To Become a Dwarf
by Akiluna
Summary: To become a dwarf you need several things…first of all, having one of them to vouch for you is compulsory. Then it's cooking lessons, cultural misunderstandings and lots of yelling, shouting and laughing. I had been lucky for once, since I met three of them…and they introduced me to their world./ starts pre-quest. slow romance. Nori/OC
1. Journey to the center of Middle Earth

**Everything belongs to JRR Tolkien, except for my OC and unrecognisable parts of the plot. **

**Minor edits of this chapter done on October 1st, 2015. As usual, A/N at the end.**

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><p>I really couldn't remember how it all had started. My memories were blurry at best. One thing I knew for sure though was that I could be home right now, listening to my friend's banter and happily doing whatever was to be done. Maybe I would be preparing some stew, cleaning a bit around the living room or simply writing notes in my book.<p>

If I closed my eyes tightly enough, I could almost imagine the warmth of the hearth, the smell of the stew, and sounds of cheeky voices; I could hear them bantering, complaining, joking. I could hear the tankards clang loudly, smell the smoke rise from the pipes, and listen to the songs and instruments. And people laughing, yes, I could hear them laughing so loudly.

It was what I thought of when my mind drifted to think of home. Home meant warmth. Home meant laughs and loud discussions. Home meant them being around.

Funny how I had so quickly forgotten the rest. The far past, or so I called it.

Home will always be there now, in the heart of the mountain and never would I be able to think of my birth place as something else than a dreamlike experience. Yes, deep, deep down under the mountain was where I felt at ease. I had tried so hard to escape the protection of the stone walls, and now, I wished for nothing else than just go back there.

I wanted to be home with them.

Yet those memories didn't explain how I ended up in this situation.

My head was hurting and I could feel the blood dripping and coating my long brownish hair. My lungs were burning and I gasped to try and breathe some more but my chest was painfully crushed under the beast's fingers.

I felt its grip on me tighten and I couldn't help but let out the little air I had in my lungs in a painful whimper. With my eyes I tried to look for something that could help me, someone that would save me.

But my gaze only met the terrifying sight of a fire burning high.

Fear coursed through me. A fear that was unlike any I had felt before.

The creature lifted me higher and closer to its face and took a whiff at my hair while I had to concentrate hard to avoid puking. Being hung upside down, near such a stinking creature apparently had a churning effect on my stomach.

My situation couldn't be worse. I was going to die, alone in the wilderness and no one could or would come and help me. Nothing could save me now.

The creatures were talking together but I didn't pay attention. I could feel the blood rushing to my head and was steadily growing dizzier and fainter.

I could only see black dots clouding my vision. My heart clenched painfully and my brain stopped looking for solutions to this situation. I couldn't explain why, but I thought about my friends. They would never know what happened to me, where I went and disappeared. I knew they were going to be sad and most likely feel slightly guilty too.

Guilt rushed through me. It felt as if everything that had been done, everything that had happened, meant nothing. Every difficulty I had unexpectedly overcome, every painful lesson I had learned, all of it…in the end it meant nothing. I was going to die in the most stupid way possible, and it was my fault.

Yeah. I really outdid myself this time and I messed up once again.

I wouldn't even have the chance to apologize for being stupid enough to run in the wilderness by myself. There wouldn't even be a body left behind.

Their faces appeared in front of my closed eyes and I addressed each of them a silent apology, praying for them, hoping they would at least be safe.

My ears seemed to stop working and the only sound that registered in my brain was a rushing noise. My eyes were unseeing. The burn in my chest was all consuming. The pounding in my head was stronger than ever.

And then nothing...

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><p>*** two years before***<p>

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><p>I really should have listened to my instinct. Really who would be stupid enough to follow someone in a dark, humid and scary cave for fun? Well, clearly I would.<p>

I would admit that I had been curious to go in and see the famous stalagmites and stalactites, which formed together a renowned natural architecture. The plan had been to come in, follow the guide and the path, enjoy the view and go back out with nice memories.

Now my luck or stupidity had decided for me to be slightly behind the group when a strange whizzing noise occurred and all artificial lights suddenly shut down. For a second there was an airy silence and I caught my breath, both surprised and if I were honest a bit scared. Even though the lights had nothing to do with the room temperature, I suddenly felt cold. A shiver ran down my spine and I brought my arms around me protectively.

I was starting to feel really uneasy when I heard the guide's voice, instructing to the group to stay close together and wait patiently.

Why, oh why hadn't I just stood there?

Why did I think I'd be able to join with the group in the pitch black cave?

I really was stupid, wasn't I?

Wandering aimlessly in the direction where I thought the voices were coming from, I ended up walking slowly, hands in front of me to try to find a wall or a cord or anything really that would indicate where in the natural room I was.

I couldn't tell how long it took me to realize that each time I heard the guide's or the others' voices, they seemed to be further away from me. I kept on walking though, not even thinking about how strange it was for me to not even be able to touch anything.

What were the odds really? I was walking blindly in the dark, in a cave, and still hadn't hit a wall. That didn't sound logical, especially not for me and my blasted nonexistent luck.

At the moment where I started to ponder about those issues, I saw from the corner of my eyes a light flickering on my right.

I didn't even bother to think this through I just went directly towards it, walking with renewed energy and purpose.

The funny part was that the further I seemed to walk, the further the light seemed to be. Well others might have found it funny, but in reality that was damn annoying and creepy. I could tell that my hands were starting to shake a bit and I clenched my fist to stop it.

What was going on?

I was starting to doubt my sanity when that useless speckle of light went out completely.

Now, I had to say that the noise I made was not a whimper, nor a shriek. Nope. It was an awkward mix of both.

I stilled completely and stood in the suddenly oppressing darkness and silence. I couldn't hear the voices of the group anymore, hadn't heard them in awhile actually. I had no idea what to do. Should I stay there and wait for the guide to find me? How far had I ventured in my attempt to find the group?

I took a tentative step forward. I didn't know it, but apparently I was afraid of closed, silent, dark places. Now was not a good time to discover I had some claustrophobic issues.

I swallowed the lump that was forming in my throat and blinked several times to keep the tears at bay. There was no shame in admitting that I was quite afraid at that moment.

My eyes were wide open but it made no difference whatsoever as there wasn't even the tiniest bit of daylight. I took a deep shaky breath and started to wonder in which direction I should go, for I couldn't bring myself to wait here. Trembling I decided to go forward in the general direction where I'd seen a light, intensely hoping it hadn't been my brain playing a trick on me.

I felt my chest tighten and my heart started to beat wildly. I was not scared. I was terrified.

After a few steps my head painfully got acquainted with the wall and I fell to the ground with a yelp. Bringing my hands to my left temple I felt a wet and sticky substance under my fingers. Great, a head wound was just what I needed.

The pain did manage to take my mind from the fear I had been feeling but my respite didn't last long. I felt cold, colder than I ever had felt before. I clenched my fist tightly and bit my lower lip. I had to control this anxiety or I'll be stuck in this bloody cave forever. It took me quite a while and many deep calming breaths before I felt slightly better.

Gingerly I tried to find back my handbag that had fallen from my hands. After several long minutes of me crawling around, not finding anything but rocks under my fingers, I gave up. I would have to find a way back to the hotel without my phone, car keys and credit cards. I pulled a face at the thought.

Damn my luck. Damn. Damn. Damn.

I put my hands on the wall and slowly rose to my feet again. With one hand on the rock and the other extended in front of me, I started to walk again. I felt dizzy and my head hurt, but sitting wouldn't help me now so I had no other choice but to keep on going. I couldn't help but wonder how big this cave was. Were there miles and miles of unexplored tunnels? If this was the case, I would most certainly meet a dreadful death.

After awhile, and several more bumps in various walls, stalactites and stalagmites, I finally saw a light in front of me. It was nothing but a small, clearer point in my sight, but my hopes were high again and I walked with more energy, though carefully.

This time, the light didn't move away and the more I walked, the closer I was to it and the clearer my surroundings became.

I could finally avoid the natural traps and further injuries. It did take me quite some time, but I ended up in a large cave and I could see a small hole in the distance whence the light came. As I stepped in the cavern and away from the dark tunnels, I felt a soft breeze on my face.

Immediately I smiled and didn't lose time. I made my way as quickly as possible toward the hole that provided light. It was on top of a rocky and clearly unstable slope so I ended up half climbing half crawling on the sharp rocks that scratched my palms and were digging painfully in my knees.

When I finally reached it, I realized the hole was barely wide enough for me to go through. As I was forcing my way out, the stone dug in my back and I had to muffle a cry. This clearly was not my day and I was going to give that creepy guide an earful. This cave was clearly not safe and the path of the visit was not properly signalled. It was dangerous and I couldn't fathom how they could dare bring people down in the caves in such conditions.

My grumpy thoughts were brutally stopped when I tumbled out, falling on the side of a slope and rolling all the way down without being able to stop my fall. I rolled down before my body painfully came to a stop.

I remained on my back, unmoving, breathing heavily. I wanted nothing more than to take a hot bath and then curl under my covers on my bed while watching whatever movie would catch my interest. Yet I couldn't find the strength to move away from my landing spot. Actually I couldn't find the strength to even move away from the rock that was painfully digging in my lower back.

I didn't know how long I had walked in this bloody cave but I was exhausted and my whole body was hurting both from the wandering and the fall. My head was pounding, miserably reminding me that I had hit it against a wall.

I felt my eyes close and didn't fight it, though it probably wasn't such a good idea to fall asleep after a head injury.

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><p>I didn't wake in a jolt. Nope. I woke slowly. Though I didn't, or rather couldn't open my eyes I could still hear voices around me.<p>

Thank whatever deity or deities out there, some good Samaritans had found me. If I had had the strength I would have cried from relief.

I tried to force my brain to focus on what they were saying, though it took me some time.

"Poor lass." A first voice said.

"What happened to her?" This second voice sounded much younger.

"Well, we better make sure she's safe for now." That was the first voice once again.

I realized that I probably lost consciousness once again after hearing them, because the next time I started to wake, I could feel the ground below me was softer than before. There was something heavy and warm on my chest and I could hear the voices not too far away. At least I wasn't cold anymore, but the sounds around where different than the ones I would have expected to hear. There was no beeping sounds indicating a monitoring of my body, nor were there any movements or sounds that could be interpreted as being in an ambulance. Instead I could hear birds chirping not too far from where I was. Maybe the ambulance was on its way? Well, thankfully at least, someone had found me.

I tried to force my eyes open and blinked several times. My vision was blurry at first and when I stupidly tried to sit up, I moaned loudly from the pain and let myself fall back. My head had just hit the ground when I heard ushered footsteps coming closer. My eyes that had closed back on their own volition were forced once again to open.

I blinked some more until I could focus on the blurry shape next to me. As soon as the shape took a human form I forced a small smile on my lips.

"Hello"

Wow, my voice was so hoarse I sounded like a frog. I cringed and tried to clear my throat, only eliciting a coughing fit that had my whole body trembling and all my nerves sending pain signals to my brain.

"Easy there missy, drink this."

The old man seemed nice enough and I smiled weakly at him when he helped me into a sitting position. I could feel his large hand supporting my back while he brought a cup to my lips.

The feel of water against my lips suddenly brought to my attention how thirsty I truly was. I was so thankful for the clear, cold water that I could have cried. It occurred to me that I was turning into a cry-baby and I didn't like it in the least. I drank the whole cup quickly enough and the old man helped me lay back with gentle and careful moves.

"Thank you." I croaked softly.

"T'is nothing miss, now, are you feeling particularly faint or hurt?" He said in a soft, kind voice.

"My head, I remember hitting my head. I think…" I tried to touch my forehead but gave up as I felt too weak.

"Aye. I took care of that already. Were you hurt elsewhere?"

His soft tone and gentle eyes almost immediately made me trust him. I was really a trusting fool and this was no exception. But this man, this kind old man, had helped me; he gave me water and took care of me so far. I didn't see any reason not to trust him.

I slowly shook my head to answer his question, even though I couldn't move, I was fairly certain my assessment of my own health would be accurate.

"Just a few bruises, nothing much."

He simply nodded, smiled and then muttered just one word.

"Good" His smile was kind and I felt once more as if I could trust him. "So, do you feel strong enough to join us around the fire and have a bite of some warm stew?"

Fire? I looked at his grey, almost white hair and quirked an eyebrow. Wasn't he a tad too old for camping? Still I couldn't say no to the idea of warm food in my stomach so I nodded. I was perhaps too eager as I winced from a sudden pain in my head.

"There, there. Don't move too fast. I'll help you."

When had standing become such a painful process? I bit on my own lip and limply made my way to a fallen log where the old man helped me sit.

When he helped me walk, I realized he was quite short for a man, actually we were approximately the same size and I wasn't known for being tall, quite the opposite actually. Apparently I had gained my nickname of pixie from my mother's side of the family; from what my very short aunt had told me. All the women in my mother's family had been short. Really short.

I looked up and saw two other men, or rather a man and a younger one. The second one couldn't possibly be older than me. They were both staring at me so I averted my eyes, choosing to look at the fire instead of observing them. I didn't really like to be the centre of attention. I shifted slightly, trying and failing to be comfortable on the log.

When the old man gave me a bowl with a spoon and hot stew I smiled largely at him.

"Thank you Mister…hem, sorry I forgot to ask your name." I felt my cheeks heat up a bit at this sudden realization.

"Oh, no worries Miss." He once more smiled at me. "I'm Dori, at your service." He bowed as he spoke and I frowned a bit at the oddity. "And these are my two younger brothers."

He made a gesture towards the two others and I forced myself to look at them. I felt my eyes widen at the sight. I hadn't paid attention at first but these men were probably the strangest persons I ever encountered, what with the hair and beards and weird clothes?

"I'm Nori, at your service."

The older one said the corners of his mouth quirking slightly upwards before he bowed his head. He had probably the oddest hairdo I had ever seen; his hairs were shaped in a design that reminded me immediately of a starfish, though there were only three branches in his star-shaped hairdo.

I looked at the youngest one when he spoke.

"I'm Ori, at your service." And he too, bowed his head as he spoke.

Were those actual names? It sounded more like nicknames to me. How odd. Usually when people greeted each other they used their real names. And what was this weird bow they had made each time? The three of them looked at me intently and I felt yet another blush creep up my cheeks.

"I'm Amelia, pleased to meet you." I chose not to give my whole name, considering what they had given me.

They seemed a bit put out by my greetings but didn't say anything. I wondered if it was because I didn't bow to them. Instead of pondering on this though, I started to eat the stew which ended up being rather tasty. I kept glancing in their directions, observing them without really realizing it.

I didn't know whether to be scared or amazed at their sight. The older, gray haired man, Dori, had a beard and moustache that were braided quite prettily I must say. His beard even adorned an impressively long metallic bead. He was talking with his brother so my gaze shifted to the second one, Nori.

I was utterly shocked to see such a masterfully braided beard. The whole beard and moustache were braided in multiple tresses that were then held together in three distinct parts with large metallic beads. That must have taken quite some time to do. I did wonder what the matter was with this man and the number three, for it seemed like a significant number in his hairdo.

When my gaze shifted slightly upward from his beautiful beard, I met his eyes and felt myself blush again at being caught blatantly staring at him. I thought he would glare at my rudeness but he simply smirked and winked at me cheekily before focusing on his own stew.

"Lady Amelia, if I may ask, why is it you were alone in these lands?" Dori's voice forced me to look up.

I frowned slightly at the whole "lady" part but still managed to answer.

"Well, I was visiting the caves nearby when I lost the group and the guide. I don't know how long I've been stuck in there, but let me tell you I was damn glad to see daylight again."

Looking at the sky I realized it must have been quite a long time, for the night was quickly falling now. How come no one had alerted the authorities yet? Surely a lost visitor was some kind of priority right? They had to know I had lost my way, right?

The three men reacted strangely at my words. Frowning and clearly puzzled by something I had said. Maybe they didn't understand why I decided to visit a cave, after all none of my so called friends had wanted to come with me. An unwelcomed feeling of shame started to blossom in my chest and I had the urge to explain myself, which was utterly preposterous.

"You see, I just got the results for my finals and I failed. I wanted to change my mind and I thought that a holiday and the visit of this cave would cheer me up. It did actually at first. It's truly an amazing sight, the columns and stuff…"

I stopped talking entirely as I saw that they seemed even more lost than before after my little explanation. Now that I was actually able to think relatively properly, I wondered at how it could be possible for me to meet three weird looking men who spoke perfect English, albeit strongly accented, in the middle of the French countryside.

One of them asked me a question though, thus stopping that trail of thought.

"I'm sorry milady, but what cave?" It was the youngest one who spoke softly.

"It must be close by, though I forgot its name and lost the prospectus in the dark. Actually, I lost everything in the dark…" I sighed silently cursing myself, how unlucky could I be to lose my handbag and all my belongings in a dark dingy place?

I had absolutely no chances to ever see them again.

Glancing up I saw the three men exchange glances as they clearly seemed surprised by my answer. I started to frown. Something was wrong. Well, something aside me getting lost and ending up with such a crowd.

From their appearance to the fact that they were camping in the middle of nowhere, something just wasn't right. It started to worry me slightly to say the least.

My gaze shifted from the cauldron, yes cauldron, on top of the fire to the metallic bowl in my hand that was beautifully crafted. Then I glanced at the men, their beards and hair, their strange looking clothes, their weird apparently leather boots.

As I was observing intently my companions for the first time, I finally ended up looking at a strange looking wooden stick. Analyzing it I realized it was more of a sort of hammer than a walking stick, with the dangerous looking metallic end of it that even had some spikes.

My eyes widened slightly and wandered to a very lethal looking sword near Dori.

Ok, now there was a problem.

Who were these guys?

Starfish, or Nori if I wanted to be polite, apparently saw that something was suddenly wrong with me. Well, the fact that I let a perfectly good bowl of stew falling on the ground was sort of a dead giveaway.

I wasn't really proud of my reaction. My hands had started shaking violently as images of violent deaths started to play in my mind.

"Milady, are you alright?" The old man worriedly enquired.

My gaze fixated on Dori and I felt my mouth dry and a large lump form in my throat. I could guess that I was turning pretty pale too. I felt faint and light headed, but now was not a good moment to lose consciousness. I forced myself to swallow the lump and muttered in a sickeningly shaky voice.

"Who…who are you guys?"

"I'm sorry, milady?" Dori seemed genuinely surprised by my sudden change of mood.

"What…why do you have those?"

I pointed at their weapons and idly wondered if I should try to stand and prepare to dash away. I was really starting to freak out. They had the indecency to look surprised by my question. As if wandering around with medieval and most importantly lethal weapons in our days and age was a common occurrence.

Dori answered, he was the only one who was really speaking with me so far, the other two simply looking at the exchange. Though the youngest, Ori, looked at me with curiosity and wonder, while the other, Nori, seemed more serious in his appraisal.

"Do not fear us milady" Dori gently tried to calm me. "We only travel with those for our own protection."

Yeah, right. I could bet many victims heard this speech before.

"Protection? Against what?"

I managed not to snort, but barely. These guys took me for an imbecile if they thought I was going to believe them. I just had to try and play for time, I needed to bolt away but right now I knew I couldn't. My whole body protested at the simple thought of running away in the forest.

When Dori answered though I realized I was in a bigger problem than I previously thought.

"Well, orcs, goblins or other creatures found in these parts, mostly wolves around here."

These men were mad.

They believed they were living in some kind of magical land with monstrous creatures. It was just my luck to end up being rescued by such weirdoes.

Now, how should I play this? Bluntly telling them orcs and goblins didn't exist might generate reactions I didn't care to witness. Should I make them believe I was living in the same fantasy as them? It might be safer for now to act along.

"Right, how silly of me." I forced a smile on my lips as I replied.

There was a short silence before I cleared my voice. I wasn't sure this would be a good idea, but it truly seemed that I wouldn't have much choice anyway so I had to ask them for help.

"Do you think you could…hem" What was the word to use with medieval freaks? "Yes, hem, would you mind escorting me to the nearest city or town?"

"Of course not milady, we wouldn't let you travel along these parts alone. It's far too dangerous; as I said, wolves have been seen recently in these mountains."

"Right. Wolves. Hem where is the nearest town, I'm a bit lost." I tried to put aside the unbelievable bits of information he clearly thought were true.

"We are a few days away from the village of Beinne, milady."

That made me pause for a minute. I had never heard of such a village, but on the other hand I wasn't very familiar with the area. Maybe I had walked under that mountain longer than what I had previously thought.

"I'm not sure where we are exactly." I admitted.

"We're north of Forlond milady."

This man was an expert with answering questions in a way that I had no choice but to ask him some more.

"I'm sorry, but where is that?" I insisted.

"North of the Gulf of Lune, in the southern area of the Ered Luin." He replied patiently, though I could tell that his brother was becoming more suspicious after each new question I asked.

I didn't pay attention to the brother though. I wanted to scream right now. This man was not making any sense, I had never heard of any of these places and there was no gulf in the close area. Even the names sounded foreign.

I could see that Nori was observing me with a deep frown, while Dori seemed to wonder why we apparently couldn't understand each other. The old man talked once more, breaking my musing.

"Milady, where do you hail from?"

He was starting to seriously annoy me with the 'milady' he uttered at each sentence and all the other silly vocabulary and notions he seemed to enjoy using. Seriously these creeps were living in their fantasies quite thoroughly. Well, anyway there was no harm in answering that question.

"I'm from UK. I came here for holidays. As I told you I wanted and needed a change in atmosphere."

Why did they look like I was talking in Chinese every time I spoke? It was starting to grate on my nerves, my tiredness not helping me being patient.

"We are … not familiar with such city. Is it in the southern parts of Eriador?

"Nope, it's Western part of Europe, the islands west from France and Belgium. And it's a country not a city."

Here it is again, that annoying look that says 'we really don't get a word you're saying'. Who didn't know Europe or UK for that matter? These men were camping in France and were unaware of its geography? I was seriously wondering whether they were actually sick and not just weird. Maybe they had escaped from a nearby mental hospital?

Oh, I did not want to think about the creepy possibilities such a thing entailed. Nope, I'd rather believe they were happy dudes living their dreams during their holidays.

"We never heard of such a country. But you said it's an island in the West? Are you by any chance an elf?" The youngest, Ori asked in a sweet voice.

I couldn't help it. Really I couldn't.

I laughed. I couldn't remember when was the last time I laughed so much that my stomach started to hurt like this. These men were both scary and awesome in their craziness. That was quite a feat. It took me quite some time to calm down my sudden laugh and I brushed away some tears that had spilt on my cheeks. Catching my breath I looked at them, checking the expressions on their faces.

"Wait, you're serious?" I startled at the realization.

"No, I'm sorry milady, I spoke without thinking." Ori kindly shook his head.

I sighed, relieved, that he admitted he had been joking. Though his next words made me freeze and realize these guys had serious troubles.

"You couldn't be an elf, you're clearly too short and don't look like one at all."

It probably was the young one's serious nod that told me to listen to my instincts this time. I felt a growing sense of dread pooling in me and I frowned deeply. After gathering what little courage I had, I looked the old man, Dori, in the eyes.

"Are you actually serious?" I asked completely serious myself.

He seemed both surprised and a bit offended by my question, so I spoke some more, trying to explain myself.

"I mean, you're not joking right? You really believe…I mean you really thought…"

I stopped right there, actually unsure of what to say or how to say it.

"Milady, you should probably lie down, I think the hit on your head was maybe harder than we previously believed." He said instead of replying.

Now I was offended.

I huffed but had to agree with him with one point; the hit had been hard and I still felt slightly dizzy. And the truth was that I was indeed tired and that awkward discussion had not helped in that matter at all, quite the opposite actually. I nodded at him and he politely came to help me stand once more.

My muscles were horribly sore and standing up made my head spin a little. I grabbed him for support and he nicely provided it without saying a word. He guided me toward the woollen blanket where I had previously been and gently patted my shoulder once I was lying down.

"Don't worry milady, you're perfectly safe with us."

I smiled at him, not entirely believing his words but not wanting to show it to them. They had been nice so far and hadn't hurt me in anyway. I should at least be thankful for that.

To my utter surprise it didn't take me long to swiftly drift asleep that night.

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><p><strong>AN: Welcome to all new readers! This is my first fanfiction in English (which isn't my mother tongue) and my first Hobbit fanfiction too. When I first started it, I hadn't written in ages to be perfectly honest.  
><strong>

**October 1st, 2015: I edited some parts, added and corrected some spelling and the dialogues. I'll try and edit the other chapters as well, but it isn't yet a high priority (I guess we'd all agree that I'd better write the next chapters)**


	2. Of Dwarves, Dresses and Contracts

**I don't own anything except for my OC and the plot. **

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><p>When I opened my eyes the following morning it took me a moment to gather my thoughts and remember the previous day's events. I groaned while getting in a sitting position. My head didn't hurt so much and the various scrapes and scratches I had on my hands and cheeks were easily forgotten, but my muscles protested loudly when I slowly stood.<p>

I really wasn't used to any kind of physical effort. I was a bookworm at heart and I had spent the previous months with my heads in medical books, preparing for my final exams. Well my failure at said exams had made it all meaningless anyway.

I sighed. I had decided to take holidays alone in France in order to put it all past me. My aunt and uncle, who had raised me after my parents' death, had been so disappointed in those results it had hurt to see it. I couldn't blame them though. They had paid for all my expenses and the university fees, they had done everything they could to help me, proudly stating to everyone they knew that I would one day be a brilliant surgeon.

Coming back home with the bad news had been one of the worst day of my life, truly. I could easily remember my aunt's face; sad and disappointed. My uncle had just stood up from the couch and left to go in the garden, his silence spoke volume to me. It had hurt me to see them hurt; all because I couldn't do it, because I wasn't good enough.

Well there was no point in dwelling on it and I had been given the possibility to retake the courses anyway so I'll have a second chance. The prospect of retaking all the courses and exams depressed me greatly. I had somehow, at some point in time, lost the will to follow this path and it disturbed me greatly.

It was Ori who stopped all those depressing thoughts, coming to me and asking in a sweet voice.

"Milady, do you wish to join us for breakfast?"

I smiled at him and nodded. I was starving actually and was pleasantly surprised to see the sausages and bacon that were being prepared by Dori.

Nori eyed me suspiciously but I tried to ignore it. I was almost sounding cheerful when I spoke next.

"Hello Dori, Nori. Thanks for yesterday.

-Did you sleep well milady?" Dori asked.

"I slept like a log." I nodded, still smiling.

"Are you hungry? As you can see, breakfast will soon be ready.

-I'm starving.

-Good, good." He laughed before Ori asked me if I wanted some bread.

"Oh yes please. And I'd love some sausages too. I love sausages."

I smiled some more, trying to be both polite and showing my gratitude. But then I realized that Nori's suspicious glance had changed to a true glare. It shocked me, really, because I didn't understand what I could have said.

"I'm sorry…I didn't mean to ask for more. Bread would be great."

Dori sent me a surprised look, apparently not understanding why I had just changed my mind. Then I saw him glance toward his brother and he huffed, obviously exasperated.

"Oh Nori, for Mahal's sake!" He grumpily said before turning towards me. "Don't worry milady, there's enough sausages for all the four of us, even though my brother here is especially fond of them. I apologize for his rudeness."

I dumbly nodded before glancing at Nori who didn't seem regretful at all. Dori sighed before muttering to his brother.

"Mother would be ashamed. And think about the example you set for Ori."

I was amazed to see that those two comments made Nori's cheeks slightly blush and he started to look sheepish. He glanced at me and shifted uneasily.

"I apologize for my rudeness milady." He muttered.

I couldn't help but smile back at him. I don't know if it was the star-shaped hairdo, the braided beard or his mischievous grey eyes that met my green ones shamelessly, but there was something about him that made me smile.

We all ate silently. I smirked when I saw that Nori used his brother's inattention to steal one sausage directly from his plate and ate it quickly. Seeing that I had caught him red handed, the man shrugged and winked at me. I shook my head, smiling to myself.

When Dori realized the theft, he glared at his brother who was the perfect picture of innocence and it made me laugh softly. Nori's wink in my direction only made me smile more.

Shortly after the men gathered all their supply and broke the camp quite efficiently. Then I could see them putting on leather coats and shouldering leather bags. Well I guess it was consistent with their fantasies at least.

Then we silently started to walk.

The silence was quickly broken though when the youngest, Ori, came to me and shyly asked.

"Milady, you said you came from another country?

-Hem, yes. UK." Seeing his puzzled look I elaborated. "You know, the United Kingdom, England, the Queen, London, tea, Big Ben…"

Wow, he actually looked like he never heard of it before. Then, to my utter surprise, he took out a small notebook and a piece of what I guessed to be charcoal, and started to write in it.

"You have a queen as a ruler? How fascinating. And your clothes are they the normal garb or do they represent a particular cast or clan?

-Hem, I'm sorry, what?

-Your clothes. Is it usual for women to wear such garments where you come from?"

I looked at my tattered jeans, shirt and hoodie and then back at him. He was waiting for my answer, his hand hovering over his notebook, and ready to write whatever I'll tell him. I noticed too that his cheeks were a bit pink.

"They're quite common actually.

-Fascinating"

I was hesitating between surprise and fondness. This young man was really sweet and so eager to know things about me. But his questions were strange at best. I frowned and then took the time he wrote to ask a question that had been nagging me for awhile.

"What is it you're doing here?"

Dori and Nori, who were walking a few steps further, turned to glance at me and Dori answered.

"We're going to Beinne to renew some contracts, milady.

-Contracts?"

These men actually worked? I couldn't believe it.

"Aye. We've had some trade agreements there for decades now but the merchant we used to trade with died. We now have to renew the contracts with his son."

His explanation did nothing to silence my disbelief.

"I'm sorry your…partner died." I said hesitatingly.

"Well it is sadly usual for us to see our trading partners die."

That comment made me stop. I actually froze on the spot. Who would say something like that? And with such a tone... He actually sounded like it was the most natural thing for their partners to die when working with them. Who were these guys?

"Milady?"

Ori looked at me curiously, clearly not understanding what was happening in my mind.

Well I couldn't be surprised by that, my mind was a mess. Were these men part of some sort of sect? Mafia? They seemed so nice, was that an act?

"Milady, are you alright?" Dori asked and I as I looked at him, I saw his eyes widened when he recognized the sudden fear in mine.

"Milady?

-Are you…are you going to kill me?"

I agree that was probably the worst and stupidest question I could have asked. But at the moment it seemed perfectly coherent in my mind.

They seemed shocked, bewildered even, that I dared asked them this.

"What, why? I mean, why would you ask such a thing milady?

-Well…you said you're used to people you know dying so…

-Men, milady, we're used to men dying earlier than us."

I think my eyes were as wide as saucers. Did he actually believe this answer would quiet down my anxiety? He said it with such finality too, as if his words were evident, as if this would explain everything. It didn't even start to answer my question.

"Right, so you don't kill women?"

I admit it, using irony wasn't probably my best idea but apparently I was in a pretty stupid mood right now. Dori white brows almost disappeared in his hairline.

"I meant men kind milady."

Men kind? What was that suppose to mean? Not even bothering to think about a potential answer I asked.

"Men kind? As opposed to what exactly?"

The three brothers glanced at each other before Dori answered me once more.

"Well, men as opposed to elves, dwarves or hobbits for example…"

Blank. I think my mind actually went totally blank for a few seconds. Were these guys for real? Apparently they were far sicker than I had previously thought. I guessed that my previous strategy was safe as I hadn't been killed or hurt yet. So once again I played along.

"Of course. Dwarves and elves. How silly of me."

Dori and Nori seemed to have a silent conversation and Nori nodded ever so slightly before his older brother turned towards me again and asked.

"Milady, I feel I have to ask you. Are you by any chance entirely foreign to our land and its inhabitants?"

I don't know what it was, his tone or his eyes maybe, but something suddenly made me doubt myself. I hesitated for a moment. These men didn't look sick, yet everything they said and their behaviours just didn't make sense. I took a deep breath and decided to be truthful.

"To be honest mister Dori" I paused a bit, not for dramatic purpose, but simply because I was unsure of what to say. "I'm not entirely certain of what to tell you."

Dori nodded and Nori's suspicious gaze was back, though no sausages were in sight. Ori had stopped scribbling in his notebook since the whole discussion started and simply looked at me and his brothers alternatively.

"Well, I'm sure we'll find more answers for you in Beinne."

And that was it. Dori and Nori started walking once more and Ori followed. Still unsure of what to think but clearly afraid to be left alone I simply joined them.

I was exhausted when we paused for a brief lunch around midday and I can honestly say I was sleepwalking when we finally stopped that evening.

My mind couldn't get around the fact that I hadn't seen anything even remotely close to civilization during the whole day. No roads, fences, electric or phone cables, streetlight or whatever. Not even a plane in the sky. Nothing was there but the pine forest, muddy and grassy ground with large mountains looming not too far from us.

When the three brothers decided to stop, I'm not proud to say I actually let myself fall on the ground. Completely exhausted I didn't even try to look around for a log or rock to sit on. I dozed off while they prepared some stew and shamefully accepted a bowl of their tasty food even though I hadn't done anything to earn it.

"Thank you. You're all being very nice.

-It's perfectly fine milady, we wouldn't leave you alone in the mountains. We'll be in Beinne in a few days and we'll find somewhere for you to inquire about your kin."

There he went again with the strange speeches. I looked at him, raising my eyebrow and asked.

"What do you mean?"

He seemed genuinely puzzled by my question.

"Milady, surely you hope to meet with your escort once more.

-My escort?

-Do you mean to say that you were wandering alone in these parts? Without the protection of your kin?"

When I nodded I distinctly heard Nori say something that sounded like a curse, though I didn't understand which language he had used.

I understood easily enough that yet another weird thing was going on, but I really couldn't fathom what it was. Every time I spoke with these men they said weird things and seemed not to understand what I said.

A soft voice in my head was starting to whisper that maybe, just maybe, something far stranger than I thought was going on. I shut that stupid voice down. I was just lost somewhere in France, nothing more. If I started to believe that something else had happened, it would mean I was becoming as ill as those men were. Maybe their illness was contagious?

I shook my head and looked at Nori who seemed angry about something. Quite tired and not used to avoid speaking my mind, I asked them.

"I'm sorry. I feel something's going on. Why are you all so surprised that I travel alone?"

Surprisingly it was Nori who answered this time.

"Our kin takes care of its women. We would never let them wander the wilderness alone. We protect them. It is…shocking for us to think of a woman left to fend for herself.

-My uncle and aunt gave me money, and France is quite safe."

He scoffed before replying

"Money would not save you from wolves' teeth. And what is Furans anyway?

-France. The country we're currently in. France, where they eat baguette bread and cheese and where the people have an awful temper. And seriously I can't believe the French authorities would let that many dangerous wolves wander around freely.

-We are not in that country you speak of milady" Dori intervened. "We're close to the Elvish land of Forlindon."

I shook my head. There was no use speaking with them, they were far to engrossed in their fantasy world. I sighed and saw quite clearly that the elder brothers were as upset as I was with our communications issues.

Even though we spoke the same language it felt as if we weren't. I ate the stew in silence and was asleep soon after, trying not to think too much about all those weird facts my mind was steadily registering; their ability to speak flawless English was puzzling me already and I didn't want to think about other oddities.

The next three days were spent in a similar fashion. We walked a lot and spoke together politely but not much. Every time we tried, one of us would say something that either I or they didn't understand.

It was in the early afternoon of the third day that Dori said something that forced me to look around.

"Here's Beinne milady. Surely you'll find answers here."

I looked forward and saw what could only be described as a village, certainly not a town. From afar I couldn't see any electric post, paved roads, parking or supermarket. There weren't even any advertisement signs or tall buildings, just small houses that appeared to be built with wood. These small houses had mostly one floor, though a few were slightly higher but none were reaching more than three storeys. There were pastures around and I could see horses and what I guessed to be goats and sheep.

The closer we got to the village, the more dread I felt.

What was this place?

There was only one way to describe the muddy paths, the dirty roads and shabby walls. Only one word came to my mind. Ancient. It looked like a medieval movie stage, complete with the tall men walking around with swords, bows and guiding cows and pigs in the middle of muddy streets.

I stopped dead in my track.

Yep, something was clearly wrong. I don't know why I did what I did next; I can only say my body reacted on its own volition.

I extended my hand and strongly gripped Nori's sleeve. The man looked at me with a questioning glance.

I swallowed the lump in my throat and managed to say in a little, unsure voice.

"Mister Nori, I think I'm really, really lost."

He seemed to see something in my face for he gently took my hand in his and squeezed it lightly.

"Come milady, we'll try to help you find your way back home."

I nodded and followed him. I became suddenly aware of many curious glances and insistent stares sent in my direction and it unnerved me greatly. They weren't so much glaring actually as they were leering at me which made my skin crawl.

What was wrong with these people? I was probably going to yell at the folks around to leave me alone when Dori and Nori both started to walk close to me, Dori at my left and Nori at my right.

Ori I noticed was close behind and was sending fierce glares at every man we encountered and who was looking at me.

"I don't understand why are they staring at me?

-They believe you to be a dwarvish lady, milady, and they're not used to see them.

-What?" I knew I was short with my 5 feet 1, almost 5 feet 2, but still, it was not a reason to stare at me in such a rude way.

"Your foreign clothes are not helping either milady" Nori told me before looking at his brother. "Maybe we should try to find her something more…suitable for this crowd?"

Dori nodded and I felt hugely offended. Looking around once more I realized I was probably the only woman around who wasn't wearing a heavy dress that covered basically every inch of her body.

Looking at my attire I had to admit it was quite different from this place's trends. Still there was nothing indecent in my clothes.

"My clothes are fine." I said angrily.

Nori glanced at me from the corner of his eye before shrugging.

"They might be alright where you come from milady, but here they're … slightly indecent.

-Indecent? In what way are my clothes indecent?" I was shocked.

My jeans were forms fitting but the waist band was quite high and my shirt and hoodie covered me completely. My shirt's neckline wasn't even low and my hoodie reached almost the top of my thighs. There was absolutely no skin showing, nothing.

Surprisingly Nori's cheeks coloured slightly and he cleared his throat before glancing at his brother. Dori didn't seem as nervous but was quite obviously uneasy.

"Well, milady, women around here don't usually wear breeches.

-Breeches?' I chose to ignore that. 'What, why?

-They, hem, they are too…well you see it's considered indecent that, well, we can pretty much see everything."

I frowned. Were they seriously thinking that jeans were indecent? Wow, that was weird.

"Alright" I drawled, unconvinced.

We walked quickly to an old dingy looking house with a larger window at the front. All the time I tried to avoid looking at the copious amount of dirt, mud and waste that covered the streets and smelt awful.

Dori opened the wooden door and I heard a bell ring inside, an actual bell that hung on the other side of the door. Nori gently pushed me with his large hand between my shoulder blades and I was obliged to enter this strange building.

"Master Dori, master Nori!" A booming voice exclaimed from the other end of the room. "Even master Ori came!"

I didn't pay much attention as I was too busy looking around. This was a shop I realized. They were selling metallic objects of all sorts. There were bowls, plates, spoons and knives. I could see cups, tankards, vases too. The only common factors to all those objects were the materials used to create them.

I gingerly approached a table filled with cups of all sorts and I took one in my hands. It was similar to the ones the three brothers had used during our short journey. I couldn't say which metal had been used but still the design, though simple, was greatly enhanced by the carvings decorating it. It was simple yet really pretty.

I looked at the brothers who were discussing with a middle aged man, surely the owner of the shop. So they really were merchants? I had seriously doubted that information. Looking back at the cup in my hand I let my fingers caress the intricate carvings, just lines really, that curved and crisscrossed on the surface in what reminded me vaguely of Celtic patterns.

"Lady Amelia?"

Ori's voice woke me from my observation and I blinked a few times, looking at him.

"Yes?

-Do you wish to stay here or will you join us upstairs for a drink?

-Oh, sorry Ori, I'll follow you."

I put back the cup on the table, cautious not to let it fall though I doubted it would break it. I then followed Ori towards wooden stairs and quickly found myself seated between Ori and Nori at a large wooden table.

"Do you want some chamomile milady?"

Dori asked, already serving himself a cup. I nodded and smiled. I wasn't that fond of this drink but my aunt loved it and to simply smell it from afar brought me fond memories of her. I idly wondered how my aunt and uncle were doing. I had left their house without a word or a message. Basically I had run away and was now ashamed of it. I really hoped they wouldn't worry too much about me for I was starting to have this feeling that I wouldn't see them in awhile.

Dori gave me a cup full of warm yellowish liquid and I thanked him with a smile. The man, the owner of the shop, came in at that moment with a plate full of cheeses and bread.

After he sat down, we all drank and ate in silence for a bit. Nori and the man were drinking from tankards what I guessed to be beer, and Ori hadn't been given a choice, his eldest brother giving him a cup of chamomile. I couldn't help but smile when I saw his doubtful look. A short while later Dori spoke.

"We wish to let you know how sorry we were to hear of your father's passing.

-Thank you Master Dori. He had been sick the whole winter, it was no surprise though we had hoped he'd come through it."

Dori and Nori nodded, both serious and quite grim looking. Dori enquired further a few minutes later.

"How is your family faring Tom?

-It's been hard these past few years. My wife works with me but we don't sale as much as before. The lads are working in the barns and fields too.

-We hadn't heard the situation was complicated for your family.

-T'is not just us. The elves don't come as much in our parts, the trades aren't what they used to be. Without the elves, it's almost half of our sales that are left over. Not many people travel these days, least of all here."

I listened absentmindedly, quite surprised to see that no one was shocked to hear about children working in barns and fields. What was this place? I asked myself for the umpteenth time. This man seemed as crazy as the three others, what with his speech about elves not coming anymore?

I imagined an army of tiny little creatures with pointy hats buying bowls and cups and almost snorted.

When I heard my name though, I forced my brain to concentrate once more on the discussion.

"We'll review the contracts tomorrow if you wish. Today we have to help the lady Amelia.

-Oh I don't want to disturb you all." I intervened blushing.

Nori smirked and Dori gave me a sweet smile.

"Do not worry milady, we promised you we'll help.

-If you want to buy her clothes, you might want to go by Ruth's shop. She's my wife's cousin and does an honest job. She's the best seamstress around.

-Then we'll go there now."

Seamstress? I sighed wondering why I was still surprised. Until now everything was quite consistently strange, there was no use being constantly surprised. As they kept on talking, an idea came to me and I waited for a lull in their conversation to ask the man.

"Excuse me, but do you have a map of this country?

-Country?

-I believe she means a map of our land." Dori gently provided and I nodded.

Apparently the brothers had understood what I wanted to do and eagerly helped the man when he came with a large parchment that he unrolled on the table. Yes, parchment, there was no other word for it. I said already I would not be surprised anymore…

It took me maybe a minute to look at the strange map before I glanced toward Dori. He looked at me expectantly and I felt strangely sorry to disappoint him.

"I don't recognize anything on this map." I said sadly.

"Nothing? Nothing at all?

-No Mister Dori, I don't recognize the area, the mountains, and the cities. It makes no sense whatsoever to me.

-How is that possible? This map represents Middle Earth quite thoroughly, even though the eastern and southern parts are missing."

I shook my head and sighed, rising my hands to cover my eyes. I was starting to grow tired of this whole stunt already. There was no indication as to where I was. People around spoke English, an oddly accented English, but English nonetheless and that was highly incoherent with me being supposedly in the middle of France.

The map didn't make sense, the people didn't make sense. Even the landscape didn't make sense as it didn't look even remotely like it should have been looking.

Ori awkwardly patted my shoulder, trying to cheer me up I imagined. I smiled at him, he was a nice person. His brothers had been nice too. It really wasn't their fault that I was in such a mess.

Looking at them I pondered my next decision for a few minutes. I didn't say a word though until the man left the room once more, going back downstairs. Then I sighed heavily and spoke my mind.

"I'm sorry Mister Dori. I really don't understand where I am. Everything here is unfamiliar. Your clothes, this village, even the way you speak. It's really strange for me and I don't understand how it could be. It shouldn't be. Before I ended up lost in that cave I was in a perfectly known and normal place for me. It's been strange since I got out actually."

The brothers stayed silent until Nori spoke.

"You're strange to us too milady.

-Trust me, I believe that."

They smirked and snorted while I smiled. We all knew something odd was happening, but there truly was nothing I could think about that would change my situation.

"Have you ever met someone like me? I asked them.

-Never milady.

-And you don't know anyone that could help me?"

They looked at each other before Dori answered.

"No one comes to my mind milady.

-Well…"

I stayed silent for a bit and closed my eyes. I could feel many emotions bubbling inside me. I was scared, had been almost constantly scared since I was in that cave. I was nervous and anxious and that feeling of helplessness only worsened it. The lump was back in my throat and I could feel tears starting to burn behind my eyelids.

What was I going to do?

I realized I had spoken aloud when, some moments later, Dori's soft voice told me.

"We understand you're lost and alone milady. If you wished we could talk to the men here and see if you could stay with them."

His answer didn't comfort me in the slightest. I didn't like these people. They stared at me weirdly and were all tall. In my city I was used to be small, but I wasn't the only one. Here the only small people I had met were the three brothers, all the others were towering over me. And the place was beyond dirty. I didn't like it.

My silence must have let them know what I thought of their idea for Ori cleared his throat and talked next.

"Or she could come back home with us."

I opened my eyes and stared at him, utterly surprised. Apparently I wasn't the only one for the two others were staring at the poor Ori who shifted awkwardly on his seat before starting to talk again.

"Well, we found her so she's somehow our responsibility. And she could almost look dwarfish if she had a beard…"

I chose not to pay attention to that last part about a beard and looked at Dori and Nori. Truthfully I didn't know what I was hoping for them to say. I didn't even know if I was hoping for them to say something.

Dori was the first to break the silence.

"T'is true that we are responsible of the lady Amelia.

-How so?" I couldn't help but ask.

Nori pondered before answering.

"We're the ones who found you. You're obviously alone here and we're the only persons you know.

-I don't want to impose on you because of some twisted logic.' I grimaced.

-That's not it. We told you, our kin is very protective of his women. Abandoning you here when you're alone would be wrong.

-You could come back to the mountains with us milady if you so wish." Dori said finally, nodding to himself as if he had taken a very important decision.

I took some time to think about it. I didn't seem to have much choice; either I stayed there by myself, or I followed them back to wherever their home was. The real question here was whether or not I could really trust them.

They had indeed seemed quite protective of me earlier and seeing that the whole area was apparently stuck in a medieval bubble somehow reassured me about their sanity, even if it was only slightly.

I really couldn't make my mind for both choices seemed absurd in some way. Yet I felt in my bones that I couldn't stay in that village. I shivered, thinking back at the stares. The people around here were probably nice and all. But they really had left me with a very, very bad first impression, whereas Dori, Nori and Ori had been nothing but friendly and nice if slightly strange.

I looked Dori in the eyes and asked him.

"Do you really have no idea where my home could be?

-No milady. We share the same impression you do. You're not from these lands, but we don't know anything else than that.

-And you would really offer me to follow you back to your place?

-Yes milady."

I took a deep breath as my next question might offend them.

"What would my coming with you entail exactly?"

Nori smirked and Dori smiled at that. They didn't seem offended in the slightest, which surprised me greatly. I was even more puzzled when Ori joyously said.

"We could draw a contract!"

* * *

><p>Three hours later I was still sitting with the three men, an impossibly long parchment unrolled in front of Ori who was happily scribbling on it.<p>

"So, we have already covered the issues of lodging, food, daily expenses and bonds and boundaries between the two parties and their interactions." Dori recapitulated before Ori spoke.

"Should we add a paragraph for the funeral arrangements?

-Absolutely not!

-Sure"

I stared wide eyed at Dori who wanted to add this paragraph and I couldn't help but ask

"Do you plan to kill me?

-No but we should cover all grounds milady. Don't worry; we dwarves are quite efficient at drawing sound contracts.

-I'm sure you are."

I was starting to have a headache and the three brothers were clearly enjoying themselves. Well Dori and Ori were enjoying themselves, Nori was simply amused.

After two more hours we finally decided that the contract was ready to be signed. It did cover everything that came to mind when thinking about the close future. They even added a part about petty money and a special paragraph stating that any additional paragraph could be added under the strict agreement of all four concerned persons…

Whatever… I had studied to become a surgeon, not a lawyer. Anyway I was happy to sign their contract and be done with it, even though I slightly felt like I had just agreed to be a kept house wife…without the wife part thankfully. Basically they'd take care of me and wouldn't ask anything of me in exchange of a private room in their house except keeping it clean or taking care of the daily shopping.

They hadn't been disturbed by the idea that I could live with them without paying them anything for the lodging or food. It had been quite the opposite actually; they had looked offended when I had asked how I could earn money to pay them for their help.

When I had inquired and insisted about that they had simply repeated that they had grown up learning that women should be pampered. That was probably supposed to explain as well the line that went saying that they would not abandon me under any condition and will care for me until one of my kin or a potential suitor presented itself.

Well I was not such a feminist anyway and in this unknown environment I didn't mind much our agreement. Though the 'suitor' part had me laugh for a good ten minutes. I had refused to explain to them that it was unlikely that such a person would pop out here, seeing as none had been interested where I came from.

After all I was considered a prude by my acquaintances. Well they called it prude, I called it shy and study focused.

After my signature was written next to Dori's, Nori's and Ori's I strangely felt as if a weight had been lifted from my shoulder.

I didn't really understand why I felt like this. After all many people would not trust a piece of paper to protect them and they would be right not to. Still I had this feeling that I could trust the three brothers not to break our contract.

They then decided that it was high time for me to buy some appropriate clothes so I followed them back outside.

We walked past a small market where the main merchandises were fruits and vegetables. I saw some sorts of wooden objects and furs too from afar but didn't pay much attention. Dori lead the way toward a small house nearby the market and gestured for me to enter.

The tiny bell rang above the door and a middle aged woman appeared from behind heavy curtains in the back.

"Hello there. What can I do for you Masters Dwarves?

-Would you have some dresses fit for our kin?

-I might have some dresses I made for the baker's daughter. She didn't take them all though so I guess I could show you a few I have left.

-May we see them please?"

I had stayed hidden behind Dori during the whole exchange. Turning my gaze toward Nori I frowned. He was eating an apple, yet I couldn't remember seeing him buy one. Apparently Dori had seen the fruit too for he started to whisper angrily.

"Nori, can't you stop these awful habits for a minute? We've been here merely a few hours and outside only a few minutes and you're already doing it!"

Nori simply shrugged and bit in the fruit, a smile gracing his lips. He winked at me when he saw I had observed them. I shook my head and my attention turned to the woman who was coming back to us. Dori was still admonishing his brother who clearly didn't even bother listening.

"Here Master Dwarves…oh! I'm sorry milady, I hadn't seen you. Oh…I see. Do you wish to try them?"

The way she had looked at my clothes had me blush furiously. Seriously was it so wrong around here to wear trousers when you were a woman?

I didn't like dresses much and these ones especially were not to my taste. They were made from thick wool and didn't look comfortable at all. One was in dark blue colour, the second mud brown and the third was dark green. So cheerful…

I followed the woman to the back of the shop, still hearing Dori complaining about his brother's behaviour in ushered tones. She asked me to strip and brought me some sort of white linen dress and underpants. Were those supposed to be underwear? I bet even my grandmother never had to wear such…things.

I point blank refused to strip from my panties and bra and just gingerly put the linen dress and the underpants on top of them before trying the dresses. I wondered silently when and even if they had been washed, and if so how, for their smell was… not quite fresh. Everything was a little tight; the dresses were too small for me and highly uncomfortable, clearly not suited for my silhouette.

They compressed my chest and stomach uncomfortably and I could barely move my arms for fear of tearing the sleeves.

The seamstress tried to smile at me, but failed, and told me to put on my own clothes back before leaving me to go and talk with Dori again. I could hear her explaining she had some work to do on the dresses and that they'd be ready for the next day in the late morning.

I walked back toward the brothers, my hand already in my hoodie's pocket, ready to retrieve one of the only objects I had with me; my wallet which contained a few bills and coins. I had some pounds left and some euro. Though I had the feeling those currencies would be useless here. I was right when I saw Dori give a few metallic coins to the woman. Those had been copper or maybe silver, I hadn't seen properly and I didn't feel like asking.

"You don't look really happy milady. I thought all women liked to buy new things."

Nori's voice behind me startled me and I would have fallen flat on my face after ungracefully stumbling on my feet if he hadn't catch my waist just in time. The idiot even dared to chuckle while I glared at him.

"So?"

He asked once more after letting me take a few steps back.

"Nori, we just signed a contract that stipulate I'm quite basically dependant on you guys. Plus your brother is currently paying for my clothes and what is apparently considered underwear here. I think you can forget the 'milady'."

He laughed softly. I was starting to realize that Nori was always moving around fairly noiselessly, didn't speak loudly and didn't even laugh loudly. His brothers were quiet too but not to his extent. I was pondering on this new thought when he winked once more at me. Was it going to become a habit, I wondered.

"Aye. T'is true. What shall I call you then?

-Amelia, it's my name you know." I deadpanned.

He chuckled some more while Ori made his way towards us.

"What is it brother, Milady?

-I was just telling your brother that you could all call me simply Amelia. It's really strange for me to hear all the 'milady this' and 'lady that'.

-Don't you use such terms in your lands, mi…Amelia?" Ori asked curiously.

"Not really no. we just use our names, sometimes we add a title but as I pointed to your brother, we signed a contract so…

-You mentioned us seeing your underwear too." Nori interrupted.

I have to say, the deep red blush that covered poor Ori's face was quite cute and fun to observe. Yet I did glare at his brother.

"I don't recall mentioning you seeing anything.

-Well paying, seeing…t'is the same thing.

-Not really."

Dori's arrival stopped our discussion and I let a blubbering Ori trying to explain his blush to his oldest brother while Nori and I sneaked back outside.

The four of us spent the rest of the afternoon wandering around in the town and the market. Well actually I wanted to wander around and the brothers had to buy supplies. Nothing major happened and I felt like I was in some sort of medieval fair, except these guys were for real.

The intense staring crept me out quickly though and I didn't leave Nori's side, oddly enough I found his presence reassuring. Ori was always close by and Dori was busy talking with suppliers and buying food for our travel back to their home.

Later that day we went back toward the first house we'd been in and Dori didn't wait for the shop owner to welcome us and directly went upstairs. I followed while he explained the owner usually let them use a room when they happened to pass by.

We entered a small room with just one small bed as Dori explained that they usually took bets to know who'd be using the bed. Yet, he said, this time they'd let me use it while they'd sleep on the floor.

I am not ashamed to admit I didn't even try to fight their gracious decision. After three nights spent sleeping on the floor, I was really glad to have something resembling a mattress to sleep on.

Now I had just one thing to ask Dori and I was slightly nervous. He must have realized that something was bothering me for he directly came to ask me.

"What is it Miss Amelia."

I tried not to smile, I really did. Yet the fact that the sweet Dori just couldn't help but be somehow polite and formal was funny. I knew he didn't mean anything with it. It was apparently just deeply ingrained in his skull that he had to be polite with women. Weird for someone like me but fun nonetheless.

"Dori, I'd like to know. Is there a place where I could…you know…wash?"

And this simple sentence had me a short hour later in quite an unpleasant situation.

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><p><strong>AN: First of all I'd like to thank the three amazing reviewers Nori'sLilTheif, VanessaAndEllieTheVamps, and the Guest who wrote the first review. Thank you, I hope not to disappoint you. And yes, the lack of Nori/OC fics was actually what motivated me. :) I believe a dwarf with such and hairdo shouldn't be forgotten...**

**This chapter was quite long, but I didn't want to cut it before that point, the others won't usually reach this length.**

**About the OC, I don't know exactly how medical studies go. I didn't study such topics. I just believe they do have exams. If not, well...sorry for the mistake.**

**I hope there isn't too many English mistakes, and sorry if I end up mixing US and UK vocabulary...**

**The next chapter will be posted sometimes during the week.**


	3. The King in the Mountain

**Nothing belongs to me, except my OC and the plot of this story.**

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><p>I had been standing there for at least ten minutes, looking at the…wooden bathtub filled with water that was in the middle of the room. It didn't look dirty per se. it just didn't look clean at all. I could see some dirt floating in it, and a twig too. Wait, was that? Dear lord there even was some kind of dead insect in that water.<p>

I swallowed, wondering whether I should risk it. I suddenly felt like staying dirty and smelly for awhile. It was a middle age area, or so it looked, so I asked myself what exactly I had been expecting to find when I asked to wash. Apparently the water came from a well, an actual well, a hole in the ground really, that was being used by almost half of the population around at least. I had been shocked to say the least when the shop owner asked his sons to bring the water upstairs, one bucket at a time.

I put my hand in the water, it was barely lukewarm. I stifled an annoyed groan and decided to go for it. I was dirty, I hadn't had a shower in days and I stank. Besides I was quite certain I had twigs in my hair from sleeping outside. I silently cursed the brownish mane I called hair and that was probably resembling a vulture's nest right now…yes with the dead animals in it.

I had to wash, this wasn't even an option.

I removed slowly my clothes. I wasn't a neat freak, but this was hard. Stepping in the tub was an actual trial. I muttered a curse when the definitely too cold water hit my bare skin. Seriously could anyone tell me when pipes and heaters would be invented? Or better yet, couldn't anyone invent them already?

I quickly grasped the bar that was supposed to be soap and quickly washed my body, standing in the tub to minimize my contact with the water. It might have been ridiculous of me to behave like this but I really, really couldn't react in any other way. I was used to comfort, and comfort meant heated water in a pristine white tub and scented bubbles and soap.

This soap was scentless, which was really unusual for me, but it did its work fairly well. The hardest part though was yet to come, as I wanted to wash my hair. Seeing twigs and dirt starting to float around in the cloudy water quickly decided me and I almost jumped out of the tub, hair dripping water but still unwashed.

I put the linen towel around me and tilted so that only my hair would touch the water, quickly washed and rinsed them as best as I could. Cringing all the while at the thought of the dirty liquid I was using to clean myself.

I was relatively clean and felt ten times better once it was all over. I dried my body before rolling the towel around my hair. I glanced at my clothes, they were tattered and muddy, yet I had nothing else to wear. I put on my bra and used the little basin full of cold water that was on a table in the room, to wash my panties.

I wouldn't wear them wet though so I grimaced and put on my jeans directly. I hated the sensations and feelings of it against my bare skin, yet I didn't have much choices. Looking at my shirt I put it aside, hoping to keep it and clean it later on and I put directly my hoodie. The neckline was significantly lower than that of my shirt, but you couldn't see anything really.

I took what belonged to me and stepped through the door. Now came the moment of the awkward question to Dori. What should I do with the water? I knew the shop owner had been nice enough to go and pick it for me, but where should we throw it away?

I swear it made my stomach churn when Dori told me they wouldn't throw it and would just use it for themselves. Water, especially for a bath, was a luxury and there was apparently no way they would just bath once and threw the water.

Ewww.

I am still unsure whether I should have been relieved or disgusted when Dori told me that him and his brother wouldn't bath tonight…

After that charming discussion I was sitting by myself in our room, trying to untangle the mess of my hair with my hands, when Nori entered.

He smirked and walked straight toward me. His steps faltered slightly when he came closer and I only saw he was looking in my direction. I quirked an eyebrow at him but he simply cleared his throat and clearly avoided to look in my direction. I wondered what was happening to him but hadn't the time to ask.

"Here"

He said before holding a comb in front of my face. It was nicely crafted, entirely sculpted in wood and with a nice design on each side that represented flowers. I took it carefully and looked at Nori, amazed.

"It's beautiful! Where did you get that?

-Here or there, who knows?"

I lifted one eyebrow and looked at him suspiciously which only served to make him chuckle. I swear this man was never taking anything I said seriously.

"I'll give it back to you quickly.

-No need. It's yours.

-What?

-Call it a gift for celebrating our new contract." He said punctuating his words with a wink.

I looked at the comb and back at him, uncertain of what to say.

"Are you sure? It's a nice comb and you have a much more complicated hairdo than I have."

He snorted and I could see his grey eyes twinkle with amusement.

"I already have one. Now you got yours.

-Thanks then."

We remained silent for awhile and I painfully combed my hair, grimacing and wincing each time it got stuck in a knot. Nori was sitting with his back against the wall and he had produced small knives and daggers as well as other indiscernible tools and what looked like a sort of stone. He had carefully disposed them on the floor in front of him and analyzed them intently.

I concentrated on my hair and simply didn't pay attention to him and his doings. I don't know how long it took me to unknot the whole length but I was quite tired by the end of it. I was starting to ask myself whether having hair that reached the middle of my back was such a good idea.

"I probably should tie or braid them like you guys do." I half said to myself half told him.

"Aye, you probably should." He answered absentmindedly.

I glanced at him. He was cleaning or at least taking care of one of his daggers when my eyes drifted to his braided hair and beard.

"Can you braid my hair for me please?"

The dagger fell on the ground in a loud clatter and he looked at me with eyes wide as saucers and his mouth slightly open. I could see a small dust of red colouring his cheeks.

"Did I say something wrong?" I asked him after a long awkward silence.

Apparently my question shook him out of his daze and I watched him shaking his head as if to clear it.

"Yeah, no.' He cleared his throat loudly before frowning.'I mean no, you didn't say anything wrong. Don't you know how to tie your hair?"

Was that what had shocked him? Did he think I wasn't even able to do such a simple thing? I huffed and replied slightly angry.

"Of course I know how. It's just your beard looks nice, and I only know how to do a very basic braid. It'd be nice of you if you would braid my hair in a nice, stylish way.

-Basic is good. Very very good. Do your basic braid and sleep."

Now I was clearly offended. Who did he think I was? Some child that he could order around?

I probably would have started to snap at him if Dori and Ori hadn't entered the room at that moment. I grumpily braided my hair, ignoring the curious glances Dori and Ori sent my way. Muttering a 'good night' I turned my back to them and quickly fell asleep in spite of my angry state of mind.

* * *

><p>I woke up alone in the room the following morning and used that alone time to quickly put on the now dried panties. I stepped toward the kitchen area and could hear the men talking together. Well actually Dori and Ori were discussing with the shop owner and Nori was nowhere to be seen.<p>

It took only one glance from afar to the long roll of parchment for me to guess that they were discussing their renewed contract. I didn't even bother to talk to them; they were so busy with their talk that they hadn't even noticed my presence.

I went slowly downstairs to look around the shop in order to pass the time.

Nori was there, going around in the shop and noting things on a small parchment. He smiled at me when I approached and let me look over his shoulder. I couldn't understand what he wrote, he was using some weird symbols, but it did somehow look like a list.

"What's this?

-A list" he simply answered and proceeded to write some more on his parchment.

"I can guess as much. But what are you listing?

-Products we should craft and send here.

-What? What do you mean?"

I looked at him, clearly surprised. Surely he didn't mean to say that he was the one crafting those beautiful cups and bowls?

He glanced at me and laughed at my obvious disbelief.

"Aye. We're one of this shop's main suppliers. We provide them with almost all their copper products.

-Really? You did this?"

He snorted while I held a finely engraved cup in my hand.

"I didn't. But I know the dwarf who did. We're merchants, or at least Dori is. We trade the products crafted by the others and take our share of the income. "

I chose to ignore the dwarf comment. My mind wasn't even close to be ready to start thinking about this. I continued to ask him some more questions though.

"You said 'Dori is'. What are you supposed to do then? And Ori? He looks quite young, what does he do?"

Nori barked a laugh at that. He was even clenching his stomach with one hand leaning on the table next to him. It shocked me to see him being so loud after days of being relatively quiet.

"Don't worry about Ori's age. Trust me, he's old enough to work, he's a clerk, he mostly works with merchants, doing listing, accountings that sort of things, but sometimes he's asked to help write down contracts. Though he writes down almost everything he can think about. I swear that lad cost a fortune in parchment."

Nori's eyes reflected pride as he spoke of his little brother and it was easy to see that he cared greatly about him. I was surprised though by all those information to say the least, but it didn't quench my curiosity so I kept on bothering Nori.

"And what do you do then, besides writing list?

-I'm in trades too…sort of.

-Sort of?

-Sort of"

As he clearly didn't want to talk more I simply hummed and let him alone to his work. I was quite occupied really, looking at the beautiful craft. Each cup, bowl and vase had lots of details, each time different than the others. I felt like I was in a museum and time flied without me taking notice of it.

It was already late in the morning when Dori came up next to me, a package rolled in his left hand and a seemingly empty leather backpack in the other.

"Hello Dori.

-Hello Miss Amelia. Here are the clothes we bought yesterday. I thought you might wish to change before we leave. And here's a backpack for you too.

-Are we leaving now?" I asked him simply while taking the package and then the back pack he was holding out to me.

"We'll take some lunch and leave soon after. We have a long walk back home.

-I thank you for the clothes Dori, and the bag, really. But when it's just the three of us on the road, would you mind if I keep wearing my current clothes? It'll be more comfortable to walk with my jeans than with a dress."

The older man seemed to hesitate a bit before looking over at my clothes.

"I guess it'll be easier for you to walk with these indeed. You'll have to change quickly before we enter the first town though.

-I don't mind, really, I'd rather walk in jeans than in a dress." I quickly said, nervous that he'd change his mind.

It might sound silly for me to ask for his advice about my clothes, but I really didn't want to disturb them about such a stupid thing. I somehow felt kind of indebted toward the three brothers. I didn't particularly like the feeling, but it was true that I owed them a lot, so I decided now to do my best not to bother them…too much.

* * *

><p>I was exhausted. The three brothers were as short as I was, but they were walking fast, really fast compared to me. I was at least thankful that my backpack only contained my clothes and a cup, bowl and spoon they had insisted to buy for me.<p>

We had been on the road for the past four or five days, I didn't actually remember which was scary, and we were supposed to arrive in a few days in another town that had established itself close to their home. I was starting to get used to the brothers' antics and it was quite entertaining to observe them.

We had been following small paths and then a larger way they called a road and that had brought us to the feet of the magnificent mountains before making us cross them to their other side without much difficulty. The landscape was simply amazing and, had I not been so tired all the time, I would have greatly enjoyed it.

The mountains' tops were high and there was snow and ice on them that glinted blue in the sunlight. We didn't go high before crossing to the other side though and I remember being grateful for that. The rocks around had a very nice blue tinge to them which gave the whole area a peculiar atmosphere. Forests of pine trees mostly covered the plains nearby and I remember stopping at some point simply to take in the scenery.

It had been an amazing and breathtaking sight.

Though it had been scary to see so far away, and not being able to pinpoint anything that could be related to any sort of technology.

I might be a fool and I might come to regret it, but I was seriously starting to trust my three companions. In all honesty I appreciated their company. They even managed to make me forget about my home, though that never lasted.

During our wandering days I had had quite a lot of free time to think about my situation. I had no idea where I was and the clear absence of civilization was quite scary. But more than the actual fact that I was lost, it was the thoughts of my uncle and aunt that haunted me.

I didn't know when I'd meet with them again and I deeply regretted to have run away without saying goodbye. They were amazing people, they had taken care of me as if was their own child and I was ashamed of how I had repaid them their kindness. First failing my exams and letting them down, and then this; running away wordlessly and getting myself in such a situation…

Oh god, I would become one of those disappearing people who came back decades later and couldn't adapt to their previous habits anymore.

I shook my head. I missed them. I missed them terribly.

They were my parents, my family.

It was my aunt who had taught me how to put make up, how to brush and braid my hair in a basic way but still, how to cook sweets and pastries. She had been the one to listen to me when I had troubles in school and the one to hold me when I cried. She had always been a calm, peaceful person and I could always find an attentive listener to my thoughts in her. She had replaced my mother.

My uncle on the other hand had always been a cheerful presence in my life, encouraging me with small gestures instead of long speeches. He had brought me snacks at midnight when I was preparing my exams; he had taught me how to drive, shown me all his favourite movies, brought me to the library every week and bought me all the books I wanted to read. It had become our private joke that I should open a library of my own with all the books I already had.

I couldn't even start to imagine what life could be like without them close to me. I felt like an awful person to have abandoned them like I did. It was ungrateful and cruel of me.

My feelings must have shown on my face because Ori decided to come and talk with me a bit.

"Amelia I wanted to ask you something.

-Hmm" I nodded, waiting for the ever curious Ori to speak his mind.

"You said you were wandering alone in the wild, why is that?

-Again with the alone part?" It was starting to become a tad too repetitive for my taste.

"No, I'm wondering about why you would wish to wander in the wild. Where you looking for something in particular?

-No, I told you I was on holiday.

-Holiday?

-You don't have those?" I was stunned when he shook his head.

That was harsh. I couldn't imagine I would enjoy working every day of my life without ever having the prospect of nice holidays in some sunny parts of the world.

When I saw him taking his notebook out of one of his pockets I smiled and started to explain what holidays were, where people would go, what they'd do, those sorts of things. We were still talking about it when Dori and Nori decided we ought to stop and prepare to camp for the night.

"So you were there to enjoy the scenery and some time by yourself. Fascinating. Your people have very strange habits."

I laughed at his comment and nodded, I guessed it would appear strange to them.

"And what do you do when you are not on holiday?

-Well, people in general are working.

-Yes, I understand that, but what were you doing? Did you work?

-I was studying. I wanted to become a surgeon but it didn't really work out.

-What's a surgeon?

-A doctor. You know, those people you go to when you're sick and they patch you up, help you heal." I was certain he hadn't understood all the words I had said, but apparently 'heal' was a word they all knew for Dori and Nori looked at me slightly impressed.

"You're a healer in training?" Dori asked me with wide eyes.

"Well you could put it like that, yes. But I failed the last part of my training so I was depressed and decided to go see some new places and…you found me." I resumed head held low. I was still upset about the whole exams failure apparently.

"Did you, you know, kill someone?" Ori inquired in a whisper.

"Ori, you don't ask such things!" Dori admonished him while I reacted in a rather strong way.

I jumped away from the stone I'd been sitting on and looked at Ori with horrified eyes, answering quickly.

"God no! I wouldn't talk about it so casually if I had killed someone!

-But, you said you failed the last part of your training…

-My exams, it consists of questions asked on paper and discussions and other stuff…nothing to do with actually healing someone.

-But how can you train to heal if you just read and discuss?"

I opened my mouth to answer to Ori's honest question but no sounds came out. I closed it back and frowned, starting to check in my mind all the arguments I could come up with. I had the feeling it would be a pain to try and explain med school to them, especially the whole intern and then thesis parts, and I wasn't sure they'd understand. I was also certain they wouldn't agree with my points, so I simply shrugged and didn't bother to answer.

After a while Dori spoke softly to me

"Well, if you wish to continue your training, we could introduce you to one of our healers back at home. He'd take you as an apprentice."

I pondered on this new information for a bit. It could be interesting and it would certainly be a more useful activity than simply cleaning their house. Besides if I cleaned the house every day it would soon shine and I couldn't believe that three men could dirty it quickly enough for me to be occupied all day long and all week long.

"That would be really nice Dori. I'd love to continue my, hem, training here."

He nodded and we stayed silent as I helped him prepare some vegetables we had for a soup. Nori and Ori groaned. None of them looked particularly happy that evening which surprised me as they were usually quite merry during dinner times.

I was quickly adapting to this sort of life and it scared me a bit, but on the other hand wasn't the ability to adapt a particularity of humanity?

The following days were all so similar that I couldn't at some point remember for exactly how long we'd been walking.

I was trying to recall each day that had passed when Dori and Nori stopped and turned towards me.

"Miss Amelia, you should go change into your dress now, we'll soon arrive in the town that's close to our home.

-Oh, sure"

I looked around and found some bushes big enough to hide me from view while I'll basically be stripping. I adjusted the bag on my shoulder and went to hide myself.

"Don't hesitate to shout if anything happen.' Dori told me as I walked away from them.

-Don't worry." I reassured him while Nori muttered something that sounded like "stop fussing…"

It didn't take me long to change, mostly because I wasn't exactly fond of parading around naked, and we were soon back on the road.

I soon realized I had been totally right in deciding to wear my jeans until now. The dress was adjusted to my side but its hem kept on brushing on the floor, getting stuck in twigs and other tall grass. It hindered my movements greatly and considerably slowed me down. It was a pain to walk with it in such an environment.

The three brothers were patient enough, but Nori couldn't help but smirk mockingly at me which caused me to glare at him endlessly.

I was relieved to see the first smoke from chimneys when we arrived close to the town. I expected to find another creepy village with people starring at me in odd ways. I was happy to see I'd been wrong.

This village was significantly bigger and, though I did receive some surprised and curious stare, they weren't nearly as bad as what they'd been in the other place.

The first thing that caught my sight though, was that this time we weren't the only shorter people around. There were quite a lot of us actually and all of them had massive and impressive braided hair and beards. And somehow seemed for most of them to have impressive bellies too…

"Home isn't far now, just a little walk left." Dori informed me while we didn't even slow down in the town.

"Is it on the other side of this town?' I asked curious

-It's in the mountain. It's a city independent from this town. This is a men's town, we live within our own halls." Dori explained with a smile.

I didn't really understand what he had meant, but didn't ask further for I'd soon see the answers for myself anyway. I kept on glancing around the town we crossed, slightly amazed when I saw stands with amazing jewels on display. Looking around I realized that metallic items and jewels were present everywhere.

I followed them along a paved road, the first I had seen so far, that went all the way to the mountain. As I glanced forward I startled and stumbled. Hadn't it been for Ori's very good reflexes I would have fallen flat on the road.

"Are you alright Amelia?' Ori asked me worried.

-There's a door in the mountain!" I couldn't help but exclaim, pointing at the massive door I could already see from afar.

Nori and Dori laughed and the eldest one took me by the arm, gently forcing me to follow him while he explained.

"Aye. I told you we leave in the mountain. Not outside but below the ground. It's the way of dwarves, though the halls here are fairly smaller than in our other realms.

-Inside. Dwarves. Right.' I was completely stunned but Dori didn't stop his explanations.

-You are about to enter Thorin's Halls. He's our king. We'll have to meet with him as soon as we enter for our agreement might not please him much.

-What, why?

-You're not a dwarf, or at least we don't think you are, even if you are really short for the race of men. It's unheard of, a man leaving in one of our halls."

I decided to ignore the whole 'race' part and concentrate on this new problem. Did this mean what I thought it meant?

"Are you telling me that your king might forbid me from staying with you?"

Dori's face was deadly serious, bordering on grim, when he nodded and answered.

"He could very well do so.

-But…but what then?" I was actually scared to think the brothers might in the end abandon me at the entrance of their home.

How stupid and unlucky would it be for me to have walked so far to end up facing a closed door? I was starting to get nervous and anxious. I bit my lower lips and clenched my fists. Dori had no difficulties to find out those news had upset me and he patted my shoulder softly.

"Don't worry missy, Thorin is fair. He will understand.

-What if he doesn't?' I couldn't help but ask.

-Then we'll just have to find another solution. He might ask you to live in the men town we just crossed."

Obviously this would be a nice compromise but it didn't sit well with me. I didn't really understand it myself, but I had in a short time span come to trust and appreciate the three brothers. They were the first and only really friendly faces I had met and I didn't like the idea of being kicked out simply because I wasn't part of their fantasy world of dwarves and elves.

The closer we got to the massive door, the more anxious I got. I didn't even pay attention to the impressive display of mastery those doors and their immediate surrounding presented. I didn't even see the stone statues on each side that were as high as the stone and wooden doors, that is, at least ten meters high if not more.

I didn't look up to see the carved ceiling; neither did I look around to observe the richly decorated walls and columns. The blue tinge of the rocks was more pronounced in there but I didn't pay any attention to it for the three brothers took me straight toward large doors and then walked me up decorated stairs and through some more corridors and stone bridges to an enormous room.

At the other end of the room, just facing the entrance, was a throne like carved stone and in front of it I could see men discussing together. Their talk stopped though when they saw us enter the room.

Dori walked straightforward, putting my left hand in the crook of his elbow and patting it reassuringly. Nori was walking on my other side and I could feel Ori's presence in my back.

When we stopped a few steps away from the group of men, Dori, Nori and probably Ori too, bowed slightly, which encouraged me to do the same. I had no idea who I was bowing to though.

"Master Dori, Nori, Ori, how is the trade faring in the south?"

The man who spoke had barely glanced at me with his cold blue eyes.

He was scary. Really scary. I guessed he was the king and all my hopes flew out the windows, this man would never bend his traditions for good old me. I cast my eyes downwards, not even paying attention to their discussion and trying to imagine what my solitary life would be like.

I hoped Dori, Nori and Ori would visit me from time to time, but I had to be realistic, I would have to live by myself in this foreign land without their help to try and adapt. The sound of my name brought my attention back to the present moment.

"This is the Lady Amelia. We met her some time before we arrived in Beinne. She was hurt and alone in the mountains." Dori explained.

I was slightly surprised to hear hisses and several whispers when he said that though I really shouldn't have; what with all their talks about woman being protected and so on.

"She's entirely alone and foreign to our lands. None of her kin followed her here."

I think this time I heard a curse and I glanced around. There were three other men aside from the one I thought to be the king. Dori continued.

"When we arrived in Beinne, the men were especially rude to her due to her size and she was scared and upset."

At this the men frowned, one with an impressive white beard nodded sadly.

"Thus we thought it our responsibility to take her in our care. Here is the contract we drew and signed."

At this Dori produced the roll of parchment we had signed and handed it to the white bearded man who quickly unrolled it and skimmed through it after putting some strange looking glasses.

"It's a thorough contract Thorin and there is the possibility to add new binding paragraphs if

they all agree to it.

-Aye' Said Dori before adding 'and we were thinking about adding another already. The Lady Amelia had been a healer in training before coming to our lands and she would agree, even wish, to continue her training here."

All the men stared at me then, slightly impressed though I couldn't understand what was so impressive. The king, Thorin, was staring at me and gestured me to come forward. I swallowed the lump in my throat and let Dori's reassuring arm go, taking a few steps toward the king.

His presence was intimidating and I didn't like it one bit, but his stern face became slightly softer quite suddenly and he asked me in a deep rumbling voice.

"Why don't you wish to go back to your home?

-I do. Wish to go back there that is, but I can't. I don't know the way back."

I had stated the truth I had known all along but it somehow broke my heart to hear it aloud for the first time. I didn't know the way back home. I had no way to go back. I was truly lost.

I hadn't pay attention to the hurtful glances the men exchanged. I didn't know that I had said something that would tug at their heartstring quite strongly. I didn't know they longed for their own home, far away in the east.

I felt a heavy hand on my shoulder and brought my head back up to stare in the cold blue eyes. They were slightly warmer now.

"I would agree for you to stay here, but you will have to swear an oath to me and sign a contract. I cannot accept you in my halls without some reassurances."

I thought about it and I think they appreciated that I took the time to ponder this new information before talking. I had to clear my throat several times though and it was quite embarrassing.

"I wouldn't mind swearing an oath and signing a contract, but I cannot promise you I will do it until I know exactly what conditions it will entail."

Strangely enough they all seemed pleased by my reaction. I would have thought they'd feel offended by my lack of trust. Yet the king nodded ever so slightly and I could see approval in the other's eyes.

"The young lass has the mind of a dwarf." The white bearded one chuckled.

Dori and Nori seemed especially proud and pleased. Then the king spoke once more, but to the white bearded man, not to me.

"Balin, take her to your study and start to draw a contract with her.' Turning back towards me he added 'You can ask one of the brothers to accompany you if you so wish."

I nodded and glanced at Dori who simply smiled proudly. I was certain I hadn't understood everything that had happened for a lot of unsaid information had apparently been exchanged under my nose. Yet the confidence in Dori's eyes made me realize the king would actually allow me to stay after some formalities had been taken care of.

Suddenly I could breathe with more ease and the ever present lump in my throat lessened.

These men were imposing and scary, even though they were all just as short as me. But even if I found them slightly weird, I had to admit they were nice enough. Yes, these people had been nothing but kind with me so far.

As I walked behind Balin and Dori I realized I had just talked to a king in quite a casual way.

The lump and scare were brutally back with a vengeance.

Will they punish me for being so unceremonious?

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><p><strong>AN: Thank you to everyone who reviewed/favorited/followed/read this story. All the encouragements are a huge motivation. I hadn't planned on posting this chapter so early in the week, but after reading your nice reviews, I couldn't help but edit it and update it. **

**I cannot promise the next will be updated tomorrow, but I know it will be posted at least by Saturday. **

**I welcome criticism, I'm sometimes unsure about the sentence and I fear they don't really sound English. Don't hesitate to PM me if you see mistakes.**


	4. Of Bearded Women and Ageless Folk

**I don't own anything, it all belongs to JRR Tolkien, with the exception of my OC and the plot**

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><p>"I, Amelia Stanson, swear solemnly on my honour and that of my family that I would be faithful to the King Thorin Oakenshield, son of Thráin, son of Thrór, and Heir to Durin's line. I swear to be faithful to his line and heirs and to never divulgate the secrets of the Halls to men, elves or any creatures who isn't a dwarf of Thorin's Halls. I swear to bear true allegiance to the King and his kin. I swear never to break the trust put in me and swear my life to my King and his kin. I swear to act in accordance with and in the respect of his laws. I swear to act for the benefits of the King and his kin and never act against the interests of the Dwarves of Thorin's Halls. From this day onwards to the end of my life I take this oath and pledge my allegiance to Thorin Oakenshield, his heirs and successors."<p>

I couldn't believe I was uttering those words. It felt foreign on my tongue. It was awkward to say the least to pledge one's allegiance to a king, especially for someone coming from twenty-first century. This oath had sounded so cheesy, so corny, had I not been the one kneeling on the stones, I think I'd have snickered. Who was I kidding? I would have been rolling on the floor laughing.

I had the feeling those words had a deep meaning in here and I was entirely aware that, were I to break my oath, I'd be in trouble. Real trouble. Potentially lethal troubles if I were to believe the cold sword's tip, which was currently touching the hollow of my throat.

I was kneeling in front of Thorin Oakenshield, looking in his cold blue eyes while he held his sword against my throat.

I had already signed an enormous contract stipulating quite thoroughly what I was allowed to do and what I wasn't. From what I had gathered I had somehow been placed officially under the care of the Dwarves of Thorin's Halls. Thorin was now my King. In all intent and purpose I was becoming something akin to a refugee who just acquired limited citizenship. Hurray.

If I were to be entirely honest though, I had troubles accepting the fact that he actually could order me around and I would have no choice but to obey or risk breaking our contract and my oath, and subsequently sort of forfeit my life.

Dori and Balin had reassured me, saying that they had added a clause in the contract stipulating that all life altering orders from my King were to be approved by my two appointed direct guardians; Dori and Balin. The only exception being a bit of a repetition; in case of me breaking the contract, Thorin could basically do whatever he wanted without Dori or Balin stepping in.

And why had I two guardians? I had asked. Well, to put it simply Balin had been appointed in name of the King and, they had argued, there wouldn't be any tie if they were to discuss my future. Awesome…it really didn't sit well with me that those three men would hold my life in their hands until, and here I quote those bloody contracts, 'a suitor releases me from their guardianship.'

Great…

So here I was.

Saying in as clear a voice as possible my oath, in front of quite an assembly I would say.

And I have to add I still hadn't had time to take a break, or a shower for that matter, since we arrived. Thorin had been adamant, I wouldn't be allowed further into his halls without the oath being spoken and the contract signed.

Troublesome but understandable I guessed.

"I, Thorin Oakenshield, son of Thráin, son of Thrór, Heir to Durin's line, accept your oath, your allegiance and your presence within my Halls. I accept to become your King and I swear to protect you as one of my people, from this day onwards until your death. You are now welcomed within my Halls."

Had Dori not prepared me psychologically, I swear I would have yelped and crawled backwards at what came next. I simply bit my lower lip and clenched my fist, trying my best not to squeak when I felt the tip of the sword swiftly pierce my skin just enough to draw a few visible drops of blood.

The king then brought his sword to his hand and pierced the pad of his left thumb. He then handed his sword in one graceful move to a younger blond man, who I had been told was his nephew and heir.

"From this day onwards until the end of your life, I accept your oath and bind it in the blood drawn willingly."

He then pressed his thumb under the small wound he had given me. During the whole time his eyes hadn't left mine. I swallowed when he extended his hand to help me stand. I was quickly facing the audience and King Thorin spoke what would be the final words of the ceremony.

"I present to you the Lady Amelia Stanson. She is now under the guardianship of Master Balin son of Fundin, and Master Dori son of Kori."

I jumped slightly at the sudden common shout of welcome that came from the small dozen of men around. Thorin glanced at me from the corner of his eyes and released my hand while Dori and his brothers were coming towards me.

"Who are these people?' I asked them in a whisper

-They are the heads of the major important families and clan. They were here to witness your oath and will now be able to communicate the King's words to their families and kin.

-Oh"

There was nothing else to say and I sighed, feeling all the exhaustion of the trip hitting me at once. I was starting to daydream about bed, possibly some food, and clear water to remove the blood from my skin. I wondered idly if I should fear an infection because seriously, who knows where this man's sword had been.

"Dori, when can we go to your place?' I didn't want to appear ungrateful, but I felt like falling asleep right there.

-We can go now actually. There is nothing else required from you tonight so I suggest we simply tell Thorin we'll be going."

I nodded, extremely relieved to hear that. Nori patted my shoulder while Ori was scribbling madly in his notebook; no doubt he was documenting everything that had just occurred.

"You did well,' Nori said simply to me.

As we were just a few feet away from the king, who was busy talking with Balin and the blond man, I whispered to Nori

"What shall I call him?"

Nori's right eyebrow quirked while he looked at me questioningly, I had to force my eyes away of the strangely interesting sight of his braided eyebrows going up in his hairline.

"The king, how should I call him' I pressed, shaking my head slightly.

-Thorin" A deep voice then answered me, forcing me to face the blue eyes that had been looking at me not too long ago.

"You don't need to use titles unless we're in a formal setting. Balin will explain you later.' He then proceeded to ignore me splendidly and turned to Dori. 'Dori we'll need to speak more about the new trade agreements, come to me tomorrow.

-Aye.

-And keep an eye on your human, I don't want her to wander around the forges and mines unaccompanied."

I was red with embarrassment at first when I had realized that he had heard my questions to Nori, but his last comments had me stunned. I had just taken an oath to him and he didn't trust me. Well I could agree that oath taking didn't mean much for me but still. Even though it was true that such habits were obsolete for me, I would still try and respect them here.

After all I didn't want to be left alone. Still he could have had the decency to trust me at least a bit. Besides, I wasn't a pet that the men would have to walk around with a leash. Who talked like that? Keep an eye on your human? Seriously? And anyway, why would I want to visit mines and forges? What was the point? And why did he specify those places? Were they really that important? I mean seriously, forges and mines, who in their right mind would want to go there?

In my mind, I was hissing and screeching quite loudly at such rude comments. I didn't say a word though, simply too scared to utter anything.

I was really glad when Nori and Ori guided me back through corridors, stairs and bridges but I was so tired I didn't bother looking around. We stopped in front of a small wooden door and Nori produced a gigantic key that was almost as long as my hand. He opened the door widely and made a flourish and a bow to gesture me in.

I rolled my eyes at his antics and entered the threshold gingerly, sincerely curious about seeing their house and not sure what to expect. The first thing I realized was that it was completely dark inside, which annoyed me slightly, especially when Nori snorted. The only light was coming in from the door in my back and the corridor's torches. I heard Nori and Ori rummaging behind me, they made some more noise before Nori lighted a candle and handed it to me.

The warm light allowed me to see that I was in a large room with a relatively low ceiling, even though I probably couldn't reach it even if I stretched, it was low compared to the height of the halls' ceilings anyway. There was a very large hearth on the wall at my right. I could see a large plush carpet on the floor and several comfortable looking chairs with big, plush cushions on each of them. There were some shelves on the far wall and a large wooden trunk not far from me at my left that was just next to a large wooden wardrobe. While I was scanning the room, Ori had been busy lighting some more candles and Nori was already pilling wood in the hearth and readying it to light a warm fire. Overall the room was dark but not gloomy and I found a very cosy quality to it.

Ori gestured for me to follow him and I saw a door on the left wall, which had been partly hidden by the wardrobe until then. There I entered in a large kitchen that obviously served as a dining room too. It was as big as the first room, with just a door on the far wall, next to a basin that served as a sink I guessed, and lots of cabinets, trunks and closets. There were huge cauldrons hanging here and there and what I believed to be dried plants too. A small door on the side opened on the cellar Ori told me.

I hadn't much time to look around as Ori guided me immediately in a corridor with several doors and pointed at each of them.

"Here's Dori's room and study. Then it's Nori's and then mine. Here we have a second cellar and then it's your new room. It's a bit dirty as we used it as storage and for friends. Tomorrow we'll have to put some order in there.' He explained while I followed him in and he continued 'You have some shutters that are closed right now, you'd be able to open them during the day if you wish."

I nodded absentmindedly, looking at what was to be my room. It was small. It was longer than it was large. There was enough space though, to have the bed at the far right corner, against the right wall and with a small bedside table next to it. There was an impressive mess of clothes and blankets on the bed as well as various unidentified objects on the floor and in the corners.

"We'll have enough space to put a trunk or a small wardrobe here' Ori said pointing at the foot of the bed 'and if you wish we can have a small study table and chair there, and we could add some shelves or cabinets too."

He seemed to pause and then blushed slightly.

"Well, you're a girl so…I guess you'd like to have a washbasin too. Mama used to have one in her room."

His cheeks were pink and he was fidgeting, avoiding my eyes. Ori really was a nice and considerate person. I smiled softly at him though he still refused to look at me.

I could imagine what the room might look like while he had successively pointed at the right corner of the room and then gestured at the walls. He had been looking at me with expectation shining in his eyes before becoming suddenly shy at the mention of the washbasin and his mother.

"It'll be perfect Ori." I reassured him.

To be honest it was small but I had the feeling that I could, with their help, transform it into some very cosy place. I heard steps behind me and turned to look at Nori and Dori

"So you like it then?' Dori asked

-Sure! After some small changes I bet it'd be the best around!" I was enthusiast about this whole topic and I let them witness it shamelessly.

Nori smirked and Dori smiled. They were both pleased to see me like this, I could easily tell as much. Meanwhile Ori had gathered the clothes that occupied the bed and quickly got out of the room. I became suddenly serious as I looked Dori in the eyes.

"I really ought to thank you. I understand what happened today was quite big, though I'm unsure why. You all did a lot to help me and I don't know if I could ever repay you for your help.

-You won't need to. We explained countless time already" Nori started to say while shaking his head.

I interrupted him, my voice calm and steady which surprised me.

"But you're wrong. I know you said that it was your responsibility to take care of me, but it's really not. It's not your fault I ended here and you could very well have let me in this first village we were in. Nothing forced you to take me in, but you chose to do it and for that I can't thank you enough."

I saw Dori attempting to cut in but I stopped him by raising my hand. I wanted to at least finish this.

"I don't know how or when or even if I'll be going back to my home. I might very well be stuck here, especially as no one can understand or explain where I come from and how to go from here to there. So what I'm trying to say is that, you taking me in, it is a big deal for me. So…thank you. I'll try my best not to shame you and not to bother you. I'll try to learn your ways and adapt…

-You don't have to forget who you are in order to live here. Thorin would not ask you to forget about your home. You are welcomed here and soon you'll feel better. Dwarves are not a very welcoming race, but when we swear to protect something or someone we mean it.' Dori finally managed to say.

-We promised you not to leave you alone, to protect you and to take you under our care. So we'll see to it that, if you can't find your way back home then you'll find a home within this realm.' Nori's words made tears well up in my eyes.

-And I wish to thank you for that."

The two men gathered me in their arms as I felt a few tears roll on my cheeks. They patted my back and told me not to worry. I was already calmer when Ori's voice came from the corridor.

"Can I come in with the clean blankets now?"

We all chuckled at hearing his muffled voice from behind a mountain of linens and blankets held in his arms.

That night I slept peacefully. My heart was still broken at the simple idea that I might never go home; but the words and promises of my new friends were like a calming balm on my pain.

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><p>The following morning I awoke to the clatter of plates and cutlery and laughing voices. I managed to light a candle with the little ember that Dori had put on mosses in a small metallic bowl on the bedside table. I quickly put on the dark green dress that Dori had bought and opened the door to my room a little. The volume of noise was surprising and I took a second to marvel at the fact that my room was almost soundproof.<p>

I took a few tentative steps in the dark corridor, choosing to blow the light of my candle as the door to the kitchen was clearly visible and I left it on a small table which was already covered by countless unlit candles. I took a small peak in the room and marvelled for a minute that so few people could make so much noise.

I could easily recognize Dori, Nori and Ori among the group, but there were a few new faces. There was a man who was laughing loudly, leaning on the table to avoid falling from the wooden bench. He had dark braided hair and an impressive moustache. I could see the back of a massive ginger man sitting at the end of the table and with a plate full of various foods in front of him.

Then there was another ginger man, with an impressive beard that I had seen briefly the previous day, talking with the king. He was sitting, his arm thrown around the shoulder of the man next to him. That second man had dark brown hair and a small, finely braided beard that was decorated with beautiful beads.

Then there was a younger man, probably younger than Ori, who had a growing ginger beard and who was laughing with the first man I had observed.

"Ah, here she is!' Dori's voice suddenly said and I jumped slightly 'Come on in, Miss Amelia, come and have breakfast with us."

I pushed the door as the silence grew in the room. I felt strangely nervous to meet all these people. Yet I stepped in and joined the three brothers on the bench facing the one with all those new faces.

"Here is the Lady Amelia, who prefers to be called simply Amelia." Dori said while I sat.

I blushed under the gazes and cleared my throat before speaking.

"Hello, pleased to meet you all."

They seemed surprised by my greeting and it reminded me of the time I had met the three brothers. How long ago had that been? Barely two weeks? It felt like decades had passed since. Dori's voice stirred me from my thoughts and I listened to him.

"Amelia comes from a far away land and their customs are quite different from ours, or from the ones men around have."

They all nodded as if this simple sentence could explain the oddity that I, apparently, was. Then the first man I had seen winked at me and said

"I'm Bofur, and this' he pointed at the large man who hadn't stop eating 'is my brother Bombur, at your service."

Bombur gave me a warm smile before continuing to munch on a large piece of ham.

I nodded slightly at both of them when Ori asked me.

"Aren't you hungry? Do you want sausages for breakfast?

-What?' Nori interrupted 'You said there wasn't any sausage left." He pointed an accusing finger at his younger brother who didn't seem impressed.

"If I had cooked what we had left, you would have eaten all of them and Amelia wouldn't have the possibility to have some." Ori bluntly stated and I couldn't help but chuckle.

Bofur laughed heartily while the other ginger and the man next to him laughed too. Nori glared at his younger brother and I finally laughed loudly.

"It's fine Ori, I'll have some if there's enough for your guests and brother too.

-Don't worry about us Amelia' the man, Bofur, said. 'Ori just cook one for the lass."

It was obvious he had said that just to annoy Nori. Ori nodded and went to cook the meat while I winked at Nori. I don't know where it came from, but between the brothers' antics and Bofur's laugh, I simply felt good that morning. For the first time in what seemed an eternity, my home and family were far from my thoughts as I simply tried to enjoy the present moment.

The ginger man in front of me cleared his throat loudly and I looked at him when he bowed his head slightly.

"I'm Gloin, at your service.

-Pleased to meet you' I answered, bowing my head similarly to what he had done.

-This is my wife, Danà, and our son Gimli' He continued.

-Pleased to…wait what?"

My head, which was bowing already, snapped back up and I starred with eyes wide as saucers at the man or woman in front of me. He or she dared to wink playfully at me.

Thank god I hadn't offended them, I thought, struggling to close my mouth and gather my wits. Now that they had pointed it, I could see that her face was more finely defined than the others, her nose smaller, and her beard seemed thinner and softer too. Still, a bearded woman? Really?

They laughed cheerfully at my surprise and I quickly muttered an apology for being so openly rude.

"Don't worry lass' Bofur said 'It's quite rare that humans can discern between men and women in our race.

-Still, I'm sorry. I didn't mean to offend you.

-T'is fine missy. Don't worry." Her voice was a tone graver than I had expected, but it was still clearly a woman's voice.

"That's why some men believe dwarves are born from the mountain rocks' laughed Bofur.

-Dwarves" I repeated, still stunned.

Apparently my brain had decided now was a good time to finally pay attention to their weird comments. I think it was the bearded woman who finally convinced me to give a little credit to their talks and claims. They were all silent as I looked at each of them in turn, my gaze returning quickly to Danà though.

"You believe you're dwarves" I said in a whisper.

They stayed silent for a second before Dori spoke.

"It's because we are dwarves Amelia. We told you that already.

-I'm sorry I just thought… I mean you don't look like dwarves."

That stunned them and Nori was the first one to speak after that.

"What do you mean? What did you expect us to look like?

-I don't know. Shorter to begin with"

That made them laugh some more and Bofur exclaimed in between laughs

"Are you saying you think we're tall?

-Well, where I come from we call dwarves some humans who are really short. Being a dwarf is not, it's not a race and there are very few of them.' I hesitated, unimpressed by their laugh.

-Well I can assure you we're dwarves alright' Dori said, patting my hand.

-But then, those other things you said about elves being real, is it true too?"

That put a damper to their mood. They looked gloomy suddenly when Dori answered.

"Yes they exist, but we aren't really on friendly terms with them."

I nodded, understanding this was a topic for another time even though I had to admit I was curious. Would elves look like what I pictured or will they be something else entirely? Trying to forget about elves for now, accepting these people were dwarves was tough enough, I looked back at the little family in front of me and said the first thing that came to my mind.

"Then you all have beards, even children' I was astounded as I glanced to the round face of Gimli.

-I'm not a child' he protested before adding ' I'm 60 already".

Sweet mother of…What?!

I startled at this information so violently that I actually jerked and fell from the bench. Too stunned to actually register the pain coming from my back as Bofur booming laugh resonated in the room. Ori quickly came to help me sit up as I squeaked a little 'what?' Dori and Ori were patting my back, hovering over me worriedly when Nori finally decided to answer my question.

"Dwarves have a long life span. That's the reason why we're used to our humans' partners dying before us. T'is not because we kill them."

Had Nori been close enough, I'd have kicked him in the shin or slapped him to make his mocking smirk and playful glint in his eyes disappear. He had apparently a good memory and remembered clearly one of our earlier discussions.

They all laughed though I could feel they didn't mean it in a bad way for me. They were just amused at some of my words and I didn't think they were mocking my ignorance. My gaze turned toward Ori and I asked the question I had on my mind.

"But then, how old are you?"

Nori's smile softened, obviously remembering our little chat in the shop back in Beinne.

"I'm 93" Ori answered proudly, making my head spin.

I glanced toward Nori and he simply said

"144"

I couldn't believe it. One of my hands was now permanently fixed over my widely open mouth and I turned, disbelievingly toward Dori, the oldest brother.

"I am 162 my dear.

-Holy crap!"

I couldn't help it and my curse both surprised and amused the dwarves around.

"I can't believe it. It's impossible." I muttered while my brain was struggling to register all those information.

I suddenly had the urge to poke Dori in the shoulder to make sure he actually was alive. If elves and dwarves existed, why not ghosts too? Right? I resisted this urge though; I didn't want to offend anyone here.

I had huge difficulties to wrap my head around those facts. The worst part being that I realized how far I actually was from my home and its familiarity. I hadn't simply stepped into a sort of retarded part of the globe or not even into a time hole that had brought me back to medieval Europe.

Nope.

That would have been way too easy.

I was apparently in a whole other world.

"There, have some chamomile, it'll sooth you."

Dear, sweet Dori. I gave him a shaky smile when I took the warm cup from his hands. The silence was quickly broken by Danà who gently told me.

"Dori asked me whether I could show you around and help you adjust to life here. If you so wish we could go see the seamstresses so that you could buy proper clothes and then I'll show you to the market."

I nodded, smiling softly but not trusting my voice to speak yet. Though I did glance curiously at my clothes, wondering what was wrong with them again. She apparently understood my gesture and answered my unasked question

"Your clothes are fine, but obviously human made. It'll help you fit in to have clothes cut in our fashion. Your lack of beard will be quite the beacon to you being human already."

I looked at her with wide eyes and she laughed

"All dwarves women have beard Amelia, not just me.' I really was too astounded to even try to reply.

-After you're done adjusting to this place, in a few days maybe, I'll take you to meet my brother' Gloin said gruffly 'He's one of the few healers we have, he'll decide whether to take you as an apprentice or not after talking with you.

-Thank you' I answered after several minutes spent attempting to clear my throat 'I'm thankful for your help.

-Don't worry, it'll be in our interest to have another trained healer.

-Is it that rare? To be a healer I mean?' I asked turning instinctively towards Dori.

-Well, dwarves are miners, merchants, crafters, smiths. We like to build things with our hands and we have a close affinity to the earth and its jewels." He said calmly and seriously

"So you have few people bothering to learn how to heal, right?

-Yes. It is not usual for a dwarf to choose such a career.

-Then I'll have to do my best to be useful." I simply said while munching on some bread.

I realized then that there was a sausage in front of me and I hadn't even seen Ori come back with it. I smiled to him while I happily ate the meat, playfully glancing at Nori who glared at me. I swear his love for sausages was disturbing.

I laughed softly, silently thanking him for making me laugh when I really felt shell shocked and slightly down, and cut the remaining part of the meat in two. Then I simply took the untouched part and put in his plate.

A very heavy silence fell. Even Bombur had stopped to eat and was staring at me. Glancing towards Nori I saw his cheeks slightly starting to redden.

"What? What have I done now?" I asked nervously.

Was it considered rude to give a bit of your own food to someone else? Had I done something potentially offending? Way to go Amelia. First day in your new place and you're already the oddball who offends everyone, I admonished myself.

Dori cleared his throat quite loudly and reassured me.

"Nothing. It's nothing don't worry."

But this time I wasn't buying it. I looked at Bofur's cheeky grin, Danà and Gloin's surprised yet highly amused faces and Ori's red face while he was avoiding looking at his brother. I turned toward Dori and narrowed my eyes at him.

"Alright, what is it? Last time already he reacted like this. What have I done?'

I heard Nori choke and cough loudly behind me when various voices spoke at the same time.

"Last time? What last time?' Bofur asked leaning on the table, his eyes twinkling with mirth.

-You really haven't done anything bad.' Dori repeated before Danà interjected.

-You're not helping her Dori. What if she does the same in front of someone else? Or worse, does it to someone unaware of her situation?"

Nori's coughing fit redoubled and Ori was impossibly red while Bofur laughed loudly and Dori sputtered an incomprehensible answer. I was stunned by their reaction and turned my gaze to Danà. I could have bet she was my best shot at understanding the situation. The men were obviously too shocked by whatever had happened.

"What did you mean by last time?' Bofur insisted

-Don't answer that!" Nori squeaked between two coughs.

Unfortunately I had already opened my mouth and the words were flowing out before my brain registered his warning.

"I asked him to braid my hair and he point blank refused even after I insisted."

There was a short silence before Bofur, Bombur and Gloin exploded in fits of uncontrollable laughter. Danà was eyeing Dori with a 'See, I told you so' look on her face while Dori was apparently deeply embarrassed. His embarrassment was nothing though compared to his brothers'.

Ori's face was purple. How could someone really turn purple? I quickly shoved a glass of cool water in front of him and encouraged him to drink it while glancing at Nori. Nori was avoiding looking at me and was almost as red as his younger brother had been minutes before. He wasn't coughing anymore though, which I wasn't sure was a good sign or not. Was he still breathing?

I waved my hand in front of him and he pushed me away, not even looking at me. I frowned. I would have lied if I said it hadn't hurt me to see him reject me and my concern like he had just done.

This situation was starting to piss me off.

Ori wouldn't look at me. Nori was apparently angry at me. Dori was speechless and that stupid Bofur was still laughing. At least Bombur and Gloin had calmed down a bit. Right now, Bofur's laugh wasn't cheering me. I wanted him to shut up so that someone, probably Danà, could explain to me what was happening.

I glared at the laughing dwarf, making him laugh some more.

That was it.

I had been patient enough. I grabbed back the glass of water I had put in front of Ori and that had been left untouched and swiftly threw the whole content to the dwarf face.

"Shut up, will you?" I snapped.

Well that did it. I believe he was so shocked by my reaction that it killed his laugh immediately. Ignoring his wide, surprised eyes, I turned to Danà and calmly asked her.

"Please, what is it?"

She didn't wait a second before answering.

"Well you just told him you'd be agreeable to his courtship and the braid was just you asking him plainly to court you."

What?

"I'm sorry. Courtship? What?

-You asked him to marry you. Sharing his favourite meal is an old way to confess your interest. Asking a man to braid your hair is like asking him to marry you.' Bofur's good mood had apparently survived the water.

-I…' I turned towards Nori with wide eyes. 'I proposed to you? Twice?!" I shrieked.

Looking at all their faces I could see they weren't joking, even though that damn smirk was still in place on Bofur's face.

An awful wave of dread, shame and embarrassment overpowered me and I couldn't stand being in this room any longer. I quickly and swiftly stood up and rushed back to my room, closing the door behind me and praying for the earth to open beneath my feet and swallow me.

I leaned on the door with my back and hit the wood repeatedly with my head, cursing myself, dwarves and their stupid customs.

I sighed and went to sit on my bed, pulling my knees to my chest and my arms around my legs. I let my head fall on my knees, closing my eyes.

For a short while I had been happy and had forgotten my situation, but it had all came back to hit me in the face. I had made a fool of myself without even knowing it. In some rational part of my mind I knew I was probably overreacting but another, prominent part was whispering incessantly in my ears.

I had realized in the short time I had been with them that the brothers had a very different sense of propriety than mine. Apparently it was the case for their whole culture, seeing as how they still used and believed in obsolete concept akin to middle aged chivalry, with all their honour oaths and blood willingly drawn or whatever.

I couldn't be certain, but I was almost positive that asking a man to marry you after having met him three days before was not considered proper in this place. Furthermore I had said that loudly to everyone and I had apparently even confessed some inexistent feelings in front of his friends and family.

I was extremely shy when it came to such matters and I was an ardent believer in the concept of privacy. Knowing the meaning of what I had said and done was a terrible blow to my pride and personal beliefs. I had put myself on display without even knowing it.

Shameful wasn't even close to describe how I felt.

I whimpered feeling tears burning my eyes.

I wanted to go home more than ever. I could never face those people ever again and I had nowhere to go. With a groan I suddenly realized that I even had thrown a glass of water at the face of someone I had just met.

I started to mentally kick myself, thinking about how I could possibly sneak away from this place, definitely. I was clearly overreacting, but at that precise moment I wasn't really in control of my mind and actions anymore.

I sniffed, ashamed at my own reaction when I felt tears slowly falling on my hidden cheeks.

Why, oh why was I such a cry-baby? I hadn't cried once during all the difficulties I faced in my studies. I didn't cry because of my loneliness during my years at school and uni. I hadn't even cried when I learn of my failure in those last exams.

I hated feeling so weak, but I couldn't seem to control my feelings properly since I had put a step in this blasted land.

I was just about to stand up and prepare a backpack to leave, already planning to wait for the cover of the night. My heart hurt thinking of abandoning the three brothers so ungratefully after all they'd done for me.

My brain and heart were fighting a raging, silent battle and were leaving me quite befuddled and hesitant.

Then I heard a strong, confident knock on my door. I startled, looking and feeling aghast as it slowly opened with a low creak.

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><p><strong>AN: You can't believe how happy I was to see that some people enjoy this story as much as I do. So HUGE thanks to everyone one who reviewed/favorited/followed. Really thank you for your support.**

**Now, I know the brothers' age isn't specified, yet i'm going a bit AU here, especially for Ori, because the only thing we know about their age is that they're 50 years older than Fili and Kili. Well, sorry to anyone who is offended by Non-Cannon but well...I guess this whole story is AU anyway so...**

**The oath was partially inspired by a British oath of Allegiance. **

**That aside I hope you all enjoyed this chapter. I only posted it because all the reviews made me so happy that writing was fairly easy today. :) Thus the update earlier than I expected. **

**Once again, give me a few days maximum to update the next chapter, if I'm motivated though, I might post it tomorrow. **


	5. The Dwarves' Market

**I'm repeating myself, but I don't own anything except for my OC and the plot.**

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><p>I didn't know what I expected when the door opened, but it certainly wasn't Danà. Though I had to admit I was glad it was her and not one of the other dwarves. I could see her smile warmly at me when she entered without waiting for me to invite her in.<p>

She closed the door behind her and silently came to sit beside me. She looked at me, appraising me and she nodded to herself.

"No need to go and hide, like a rabbit in its hole. You shouldn't be ashamed. The men are always stupid about those topics. It's entirely Nori's and his brothers' fault.

-What? No, it was me…' I tried to defend them before she stopped me.

-You behaved normally according to your own traditions. Had Nori explained to you that first time what you had done, it wouldn't have blown in his face today.

-I'm sorry I shamed him' I whispered, hiding my face once again.

-For Mahal's sake girl, it wasn't your fault. It isn't a big deal anyway. Wait, listen to me. It is not a big deal because it happened here and between close friends. Bofur and Bombur have known Nori for decades. I can still remember them all playing in the dirt together."

I tried to imagine Bofur, Bombur and Nori as children running around; did they already have those hairdos? The picture of a small Nori with a starfish hairdo forced a smile out of me, but unfortunately Danà's voice brought me back from my reveries.

"And my mother married their uncle. We are kin, cousins, I have known Dori since we were children and he came to visit us.

-But Bofur…' frowned, still somewhat disturbed by the man's, well dwarf's, laugh.

-What about him?

-Well, he did laugh quite a lot' I averted my gaze, looking anywhere but at her.

-Bofur is one of the nicest dwarves I know, but he's an idiot. He didn't laugh to mock you, but Nori has been swearing for as long as I've known him that he would never bother to marry anyone. Surely you can see the irony of the situation in our eyes."

Danà was gently patting my knee while telling me all this. I looked at her with wide eyes, suddenly more curious to learn about their lives than to worry about my actions. I still had unanswered questions though, and I really didn't want to be so ashamed in the future.

"Danà, I don't get it. How is it that me simply giving food to Nori is like…' I blushed a bit, I couldn't help it. 'Is like…like writing a love letter?

-Hmm, it's not really sharing the food, more the way you did it.' She replied simply.

-I don't get it.

-Well. Simply put, you ate a bit of it before cutting it in perfect halves. Then you offered the untouched half to Nori discreetly and put it directly in his plate, in front of him. You didn't throw it, you didn't joke or yell or anything. You did it calmly and inconspicuously."

Alright, so I didn't throw my food at people's face, big deal. Honestly, what decent person would throw food across a table? Except maybe teens in school during food battles and I always ran away during the few times it occurred. Seeing that I remained silent, Danà continued her explanation.

"Dwarves are, by nature, loud, except in few occurrences. The fact that you did share your food in such a way is considered in our older traditions as a way to share your feelings, love usually.

-So next time I can't finish my plate I just throw it to his face?" I deadpanned.

Danà roared with laughter and took some time before answering between two chuckles.

"No, just tell loudly around that you don't want it anymore, trust me, in a matter of seconds it'd be gone. Or you might just let him steal it…"

I chose not to answer. I was contemplating those peoples' weird traditions when another thought was brought back to the forefront of my mind.

"He's so old and hasn't ever wished to marry?"

Danà laughed once again and started to caress her beard pensively.

"He's not that old considering our life span.' She said jokingly before becoming suddenly more serious 'You know these three boys never have had to deal with a woman besides their Ma. Poor woman died awhile ago now. I think it'll do them good to have you here. You might actually be able to put some sense in their heads.

-I don't think I'll ever be able to face Nori' I muttered forlornly

-Oh, stop it already. You live among dwarves now, so act the part. We are blunt and honest folks. If you do something wrong, you apologize and eventually repay the debts. You did nothing wrong, you don't have to worry." She said in a stern voice.

I couldn't help but nod at her, a tiny bit afraid of what she'd do if I were to disagree with her. It didn't register in my mind that she hadn't really answered the question I had asked.

"Besides, I already admonished these idiots for making you run away to your room. I'd wager you were even ready to run away with your few belongings, weren't you? You're a sensitive little thing…"

My silence apparently spoke volume to her and she sighed before giving a sharp slap on my thigh.

"Listen Missy, you have to toughen up. Dwarves are a merry folk, but we tend to be blunt. If you run away at every difficulty you encounter…

-It's not that…Danà, it's not like that.

-Then what is it?

-It's just.' I hesitated and bit my lower lip.

-Come girl, out with it. I won't bite you and it might help me if you explain yourself a bit.' She was so sweet, so motherly at that moment that I felt confident I could speak to her.

-I'm not used to people laughing with me. Usually they laugh at me and my first reaction has always been to turn around and avoid them. Avoid the confrontation." I whispered shamefully.

Danà simply hummed and played absentmindedly with one of her beads. She didn't speak for several long minutes and I wondered what she was thinking of me.

"Come girl, it's time for you to show you deserve your place among us."

I looked at her questioningly and felt slightly reassured by her soft motherly smile.

"Dwarves don't run away from a fight. Come, stand up proudly, square your shoulders. You have it in you, I know it. Now, I said it'd do them good to have you, but I believe you'll learn quite a few things from them too."

I wondered how she could be so confident about my so called qualities, when I had always been doubtful and highly critical with myself. I seriously doubted I had anything in me but chose to stay silent. I was mortified when she added.

"Oh, by the way, I loved how you shut Bofur's bloody mouth. I'll use this method more often from now on. Very easy and efficient.

-Oh my god' Right now I hated her for reminding me 'Have I offended him?"

To my utter surprise she snorted

"Offended? The idiot will only love you more if you stand up to him. I told you, dwarves appreciate courage, wit and bluntness, and we see them as qualities. Thank Mahal we aren't elves who speak riddles and answer a question by yes and no both."

While she continued to speak, she had guided me through the door and corridor back to the kitchen, which was now empty. I didn't have time to ask where they had all disappeared for Danà answered directly.

"I sent those idiots out to work. They were incredibly stupid and managed to make you feel bad in less than an hour. Trust me, they got an earful. Well, I was thinking to go see the seamstresses now. Feel like it?"

I felt a bubble of warmth spread in my heart for this woman who was so strange yet so helpful and kind to me.

"Thanks Danà, that'll be great.

-Come then, we have a lot to do."

* * *

><p>If I had to use just one word to express how Danà was, I'd say intense. That woman was always doing, saying, thinking something. It was impressive how she managed to know before me what I hadn't realized I was thinking. It was quite disorientating actually.<p>

She was a really nice person and had this sort of no-nonsense mind that was both scary and amazing. She could put someone back in his place with a few sharp words and be all motherly with me the next second.

The best example being when we were at the seamstresses' quarters; we entered the large room and were saluted by three women, all bearded I wish to highlight. They smiled warmly to Danà but eyed me strangely. Immediately they started to whisper in an unknown language and I had this strange hunch that my lack of beard will easily be noticed.

Yep, it apparently was quite the oddity in the halls.

The seamstresses though didn't comment much and smiled warmly at me when we explained I'd need several sets of dresses. The real troubles started when two younger women with sumptuous dresses and jewels came in, still bearded I insist to note. One of them had really pretty black hair while the second was a ginger head. As soon as they saw me they looked down their nose at me and started to whisper unintelligible words.

Well I thought they were unintelligible, but I found out quickly that I was the only who couldn't hear and understand what they were saying. Apparently dwarves have some sort of super-hearing capacities. Lucky them.

I could see the seamstresses shift uneasily behind me and Danà, who had been in the back checking some newly arrived fabric came back next to me. She quickly assessed the situation and heard what the women were still whispering. She snapped, startling me at the same occasion.

"Being rude to the King's guest and Masters Balin and Dori's ward is not appropriate behaviour."

The two women sneered and turned away, before exiting, the ginger turned to glare at me

"Thorin is wrong to accept such vermin in our halls. Humans are filthy."

Then she left not bothering to listen to Danà's reply.

"Wow, who was this charming person?' I asked the older woman

-No one you should bother with. She's visiting from the Iron Hills; they're a bit... special there. She comes from a powerful clan, is young and stupid."

I shrugged, not too bothered about this kind of talks. Well, racism, intolerance and the stupidity that came with ignorance obviously existed everywhere. I had experienced such things before, though for entirely different reasons, and sadly enough I was slightly used to it. A few particularly bad memories crossed my mind but I swiftly turned my thoughts to other topics. As I stood with my arms extended at each of my sides to let the seamstress take measures, I asked Danà something that had been on my mind since the previous day.

"Isn't it strange for everyone to call the King by his name, without title?"

Danà grimaced and the women around pulled faces as well.

"I'm sorry, did I say something wrong?

-No, it's just linked to a dark part of our past. We don't like to talk much about it, but if you are to stay here, you should know."

She then went on narrating the story of their once great kingdom, Erebor, the awful attack by a terrifying dragon, Smaug the Terrible and the dramatic story of their royals dying one after another. King Thorin was a king without a kingdom it seemed.

At the end of her tale I felt incredibly sad, as if it had actually happened to me or people I cared about. I guessed in a way it had hurt people I was starting to care for.

"T'is why Thorin do not wish to be called King. He works daily in the forges, he's a great smith, but he's still our king and has to act as such too. He's our leader. He's the one who helped us, guided us here and gave us another mountain to call home, though the olders among us still recall Erebor."

I nodded gravely. I didn't feel pity, just sorrow for their fate. I cleared my throat.

"Have you seen it? Erebor?"

Her eyes came to look at me and I could see the deep sorrow in them. I could honestly say, I had never witnessed such pain and longing in a person's eyes before. I didn't want to ask her more details and changed back to what the topic was at first.

"So King Thorin doesn't wish to be called King unless in special ceremonies?

-Yes. You know, some humans used to mock him, calling him the Homeless King, the Crownless King, the Beggar King. At the time we were so poor that even he had to slave away in those men towns. He worked in their forges, earning barely enough to feed his own kin. We were all struggling.' She shook her head forlornly. 'Those were dark times."

I didn't want to speak some meaningless words so I kept silent. Soon the women around started to talk once more about fashion and I discussed with them the possibility to have them sew a long tunic that'll reach my knees that I could wear with breeches without shocking any sensitivities around. They seemed enthusiastic at the idea and promised to have everything ready for later in the week.

Then, as she had promised, Danà showed me around and I could for the first time actually observe the Halls.

They were breathtaking and even if Danà swore they were nothing compared to the greatness of Erebor or Khazad-dûm, I couldn't believe her. Every stone was carved, polished, engraved, and finely chiselled. The ceilings were high and there were many floors, linked together with large bridges or footbridges and massive staircases. The blue coloured stones were decorated with gold and silver and tall statues, they mostly were twice my size, guarded some of the stairs and corridors.

Natural light came through holes high in the ceilings and walls but most of the light came from candles and torches. Each flicker of light illuminated the words and symbols set and engraved in the stones, some even seemed to have been painted with gold and silver.

She showed me around the halls guiding me to the places I could need in the future, the first one being the public bath and an area where I'd be able to wash clothes. I had been astounded by the large hearth used to heat water contained in huge copper basins. Smaller tubes would then bring the water into separate bathtubs that were hidden behind screens to afford some semblance of privacy.

At that moment I could honestly say I loved the dwarves.

These people had taken the time to actually invent heaters and pipes. I could have cried with joy.

I used my time with Danà to ask her about the question that had been bugging me for awhile about the water and where it came from. I then found out that there was an underground river whence water was collected and distributed through a complex system of copper tube and basins. Besides, she added, rain water was collected as well through an intricate system of holes and tunnels dug into the mountain side.

I was flabbergasted to say the least and soon my head was spinning because of technical and mechanical words that she flung at me.

When she showed me the end of one of those inventions they used, it reminded me of one of Da Vinci's; it was basically a tube which encased a long piece of wood that had been carved like a screw. By making the wood inside spin, the water at the bottom would come up almost effortlessly, following the path made by the carvings.

It was pure genius.

Now I understood how the three brother's house could have water accessible in their kitchen and how the public washbasin and baths worked.

Danà told me though that not all dwarves had access to water in their own apartments. Dori, Nori and Ori were apparently lucky enough to have come from a relatively respectful and rich family. Or rich at least before the fall of Erebor, she whispered lastly.

I walked all day long with Danà, exploring the halls. I had never seen such architecture and it was impressive. Thinking about the obvious ingenuity of the dwarves I was properly astonished. Though, each time I wondered at the size of the halls, the beauty of the carvings or anything really, Danà would give me a patronizing look and would gently explained it wasn't actually anything grand at all.

I couldn't believe her. She was actually telling me they lived in the equivalent of a barn. It made me laugh and she agreed she might be exaggerating but I could feel she still believed it not to be anything special.

We agreed to disagree.

Then she brought me to the market which was in the first large hall, at the very entrance of the whole underground city. I was impressed by the number of stands and listened distractedly as Danà explained that only dwarves were allowed to sell their products here and that it was frowned upon, though allowed, for men to come shop here. More often than not though, the humans who dared to come up to this market stayed at the few first stalls at the entrance and didn't dare go further in.

Dwarves and men lived close by and needed each other for trade purpose but that didn't mean they had to appreciate to mingle together.

Danà was explaining that it hadn't always been like this, and that once men from a city called Dale were friendly with the dwarves of Erebor, but I honestly didn't pay much attention.

I was too occupied looking around like a child discovering a toy factory at Christmas.

There were the usual stands selling food, mostly meat I noticed, and some selling other 'daily products' such as quills, ink, and parchments. But I was delighted to find various stands covered with music instruments, there even was one selling instruments made in what I believed was silver.

There were lots of items made of leather too and Danà helped me to choose fitting shoes and boots. They were surprisingly far more comfortable than my current trainers and I quickly stepped into the new comfy ones, agreeing with Danà that I didn't need the boots yet for it was still summer.

Passing next to one of the few vegetables stands I could see, I came to a stop.

"Danà, wait. I'd like to buy some things here.

-Vegetables?' she looked a tad surprised.

-Well, yeah. In my contract, it's written I'll be responsible for grocery shopping. I thought it was a good time now to start doing it. Besides, I could cook dinner tonight as an apology to them.

-And you want to cook vegetables?" She looked amused now.

Choosing to ignore her Cheshire cat smile I turned to the elderly dwarf who waited patiently for us to purchase anything. And obviously, now was as good a moment as any to get embarrassed once more…

I had spotted very tasty looking tomatoes, but couldn't quite reach them across the large stall's table and the dwarf smiled warmly and handed them to me.

I replied automatically, politeness being ingrained in my brain by years of listening to my aunt's rant. I could almost hear her voice in my head 'always say thank you, it doesn't cost anything and it makes everyone's day brighter.'

So here I was, smiling back at the dwarf and opening my mouth.

"Thanks a lot sir…Ma'am, sir…hem.' My eyes widened at the old bearded face and I started to stammer.' I'm sorry, I, oh dear..."

How can you tell someone politely; 'are you a man or a woman?' I'm sure my aunt would have known. I didn't.

To my utter mortification, Danà and the dwarf both laughed heartily. I felt a terrible blush crept on my cheeks.

"T'is alright, missy. I'm a woman."

Oh, the shame.

Obviously the joyous laughs had caught the attention of several dwarves around and they were soon circling us, smiling and apparently understanding easily what this was all about. Though I noticed most of them were first curious as to why I was here.

Danà stepped up to explain the situation.

"Hear everyone. This is Lady Amelia. She's Masters Balin and Dori's ward."

There was a collective murmur of understanding and then Danà just went back to my stupid mistake.

"It's easy to discern if you're facing a man or a woman.

-How so?' I squeaked, bright red when I heard some soft chuckles

-Look at the beards missy, if not the clothes.' The old vegetables' merchant told me.

-Woman's beards are usually more decorated, with many beads made of precious stones or metals. They're thinner too.' Danà started to explain.

-The clothes, woman wear dresses.' One of the dwarves around said.

-Look at the curves!'

-She can't look at the curves, what if the woman is wearing a coat.' A third scoffed.

-Check the bones! The bone structure is different' Another added.

-How can one look at bones? Never heard anything more stupid…"

Soon, my head was spinning with all the comments and advices coming from everywhere around me. There was some heated discussion before long between several dwarves about whether a dwarf woman could be recognized at the type of braid she wore. Even the merchants from the nearby stalls joined us in this entirely too weird discussion.

The worst, and funniest I have to admit, part came when they all circled me and decided I just needed practice.

So here I was, tomatoes in hands, looking at each dwarf and having to say whether I thought him or her to be male or female. Each time I made a mistake, they'd laugh good-heartedly. Each time I didn't, they'd cheer loudly.

I was still blushing at the end of it, but I had a wide smile on my face. Instead of being offended by my mistakes, these people were laughing them off. At that moment I finally started to understand what Danà had meant earlier. Dwarves were merry people who greatly enjoyed having fun and laughing.

I hadn't felt as if they were mocking me for my mistakes, not even for a second. If anything, they would tease each others, joking about that dwarf man whose beard did look like a woman's or this dwarf woman whose belly did hide every curve.

After awhile I had realized that my embarrassment had turned into entertainment.

I was already starting to like it here.

* * *

><p>In the end I did manage to shop for food and I was finally ready to leave with salads and fresh tomatoes that I was planning to prepare as a side dish. I also intended to prepare some cabbages, eggplants and mushrooms, knowing they'd do perfectly to cook one of my aunt's favourite vegan's recipes.<p>

All the while, Danà hadn't stopped smiling. When came the time to pay though, I felt completely embarrassed to realize I didn't have any money.

"Oh, I guess I should just forget it and give it all back.' I whispered to myself sadly.

-What? Why have you changed your mind?' Danà asked me

-I don't have money.

-What? Of course you have. Silly me. Here's the money Dori gave me in case you wanted to buy anything."

She handed me a small coin purse and I smiled widely, paying the elder dwarf. I asked Danà what time it was and we both realized with surprise that our little 'guess who's what' game had taken more time than we thought. I smiled warmly at the merchants I had met before rushing back to the brothers' house.

* * *

><p>I had been happy to discover the house was empty when I arrived. I really wanted to surprise them. Danà had stayed, obviously enjoying some private joke I didn't understand. I didn't bother asking her though, I was already glad that she helped me to familiarize myself with the wooden stove.<p>

I had to light a fire in a compartment on the left part of the metallic stove. The metal would then heat naturally because of the fire and then allow me to cook on top of it or in a small oven, which was actually a second small compartment just next to the one with the fire.

Soon I was happily preparing the food and Danà left me alone to my cooking. Before she went back to her place though, she promised to come back the following day to show me the other part of the market among other places.

"I can already tell you'd be a good addition in these dwarves' life.' She said from the threshold. 'I'm sure your food will be wonderful, it smells great. Don't let them tell you otherwise."

After these few optimistic words, she closed the door and I finished preparing dinner. I had used eggplants, cheese and mushrooms to make a stuffing for the cabbage I had then put in the oven. The salads and tomatoes were cut with some more cheese and I was about to prepare some garlic bread when the door opened.

"What is this smell?' I recognized Ori's voice.

-I'm not sure…' Dori seemed worried.

-Surprise!" I exclaimed as they came in the kitchen.

They stopped and I could clearly see they were astonished to see me next to the stove.

"I prepared dinner…I hope you'll like it, you just have to sit, it's almost ready!" I tried my best to hide my anxiety; I really hoped they would appreciate my initiative.

Somehow I hadn't expected them to look quite so happy. Dori and Ori smiled warmly at me, Ori seemed particularly cheerful.

Nori had this small, half grin, which, mixed with the light twinkle in his eyes, gave him a real roguish expression. My smile grew larger at seeing him look happily at me. I hadn't known until that moment, but I really was glad he wasn't angry at me for that morning's misunderstandings.

Nori and Ori quickly crossed the room and were about to sit when Dori, who was already washing his hands in the small basin, chastised them.

"Oy lads. Come and wash up."

Nori rolled his eyes and Ori sighed, but I had to fight an amused chuckle when I saw them both obey their older brother. One was almost a hundred years old, the other older even and they still obeyed like mere children. Who would have thought?

Ten minutes later, their hands were clean and they all sat, cutlery ready to dive in what I was about to bring on the table. I started with the pot containing the stuffed cabbage.

"I'll serve my dear." Dori offered while I went to grab the large bowl of salad and the plate of garlic bread.

When everyone was served I looked anxiously at them, waiting to know what they thought about my cooking before trying it myself. Their surprised, befuddled even, faces worried me.

"What is it?' Dori diplomatically asked me with an obviously forced smile.

-Stuffed cabbage.

-Oh, the meat is hidden inside then?' Ori looked relieved while Nori gingerly poked at the food in his plate, looking unconvinced and even suspicious with what he saw.

-No' I answered slowly 'There's no meat. I thought to try this special recipe. It's only vegetables and cheese."

I swear I could see the blood drain from their faces.

Well, Dori and Nori not so much, they just paled slightly, but Ori looked actually scared by the dish I had prepared. The young dwarf even seemed to recoil from his plate.

"You…you don't like it?' I asked worriedly 'You don't want to try it?

-Of…of course we'll try it!" Nori exclaimed after hearing my defeated tone.

He then proceeded to stuff his mouth with the food, looking both sad and surprised. I really didn't know what to make of such a combination of feelings.

"It's…weird' he said, then looking at my face quickly added 'but good weird. Really good weird!"

Dori tried with more reserve but after a few mouthfuls nodded sympathetically.

"It's…different. But it's not bad."

I turned to Ori who was still as white as a paper sheet.

"Ori, try it. Come on lad, just a mouthful.'

-I'm not sure…it's, it's green Dori."

I heard his whisper and was astounded. Now that I took the time to think about it though, I realized I hadn't seen them eat many vegetables, and those had been mostly potatoes, or heavily surrounded by meat. Maybe a vegan dinner wasn't something they'd enjoy.

Then I finally realized why Danà had smiled all day long and sighed.

"I'll go prepare some bacon and eggs if you want Ori. I'm sure there's still some ham in the cellar too.

-Hem…"

Dori and Nori glared at their younger brother and I smiled, though if I were entirely honest I felt a bit disappointed.

"Don't worry; I hadn't realized you didn't eat many vegetables."

I stood up and I could hear Dori whispering in this foreign language I heard everywhere in the halls. I prepared bacon and eggs for the three of them, served them and then sat, finally enjoying my meal.

Looking at the leftovers, my heart was warmed and I smiled gratefully at Nori who had made the effort to finish all the vegetables he had been given.

Just before retiring to bed that night though, I decided to speak my mind.

"I understand you're not used to vegetables. But as I'm supposed to take care of grocery shopping, let me tell you it's about to change. You'll have to eat more of them, it's healthier.' I tried my best to sound like my aunt, stern but nice, with my hands resting on my hips.

-What?' Ori looked desperate.

-At least five of them…' I tried to bargain.

-Per day?!' They all looked bewildered, even Nori.

-Alright, alright. Five per week would be a good start already." I chuckled and left the astounded dwarves behind me.

* * *

><p>The night had fallen and though everything around was peaceful and quiet, I strangely couldn't sleep.<p>

All the events of that day were turning around in my head and now that I was lying down in my room I took the time to think calmly about that busy day.

I had realized already how my reaction this morning had been disproportioned. I still couldn't explain why I had been so frightened by this misunderstanding. In all honesty I shouldn't have. The only thing I knew for sure was that I had really wanted to make a good impression on all these men, hem… dwarves. I wanted to prove to them and to myself even more, that I could fit here.

What other option did I have anyway besides trying to fit as best as I could?

Now that my heart and mind were at peace in the silence of the night I realized that, instead of freaking out, I should simply try hard, harder than I ever had, and do my best to become someone decent here.

I had always been slightly isolated. Part of my isolation was entirely due to me, and the other part of it was due to my sad past. It had always been normal for me, if hurtful, to be an outsider. I had friends, like everyone, but it had taken me years to understand that our friendship was due to the fact that neither of us wanted to be alone. This love-hate relationship I had in school was in reality only hate and fear; fear to be lonely, fear to be too different.

Then in uni…no that wasn't something I wanted to think about right now. Some stories are best left alone. I didn't want to feel depressed. Not now.

I had so far met some pretty nice and impressive people. They seemed so different from anyone I had known before. And here I wasn't talking about the whole medieval-like time thing.

Just their behaviours, the way their minds worked, everything was both familiar and utterly different. In a way I had to admit it really felt like I had just gone back in time.

There was an air of nobility and dignity in these peoples; the way they had proudly explained the difference in their beards for example was awe inspiring. The simplest of thing could become of the outmost importance for them. They knew the meaning of honour and were proud.

How Danà and the seamstresses had looked when they had explained the story of Erebor had shown me these qualities. I had felt somehow privileged and somehow like an intruder when they let me witness the intense pain and sheer pride in their eyes when they talked about the King and his past, their past.

There was an archaic air of chivalry, honour and an obvious strength in these people. Well, archaic for me at least. Somehow I was starting to wonder whether those strange qualities would not actually be easier for me to adapt to.

Here I had a chance to become a healer, to let my dreams come true. Here I had a chance to grow out of my shy and self deprecating shell. I had actually been encouraged strongly by Danà to let my voice be heard more often. Here I had a chance to become someone, to become a member of a group, a society.

Who knows, I might as well try and become as good a dwarf as humanly possible.

I snorted slightly to myself.

How did one become a dwarf anyway?

* * *

><p><strong>AN: I really wish to thanks everyone for their support. The reviews/favorites/follows are really cheering me up each time I receive a little mail signalling them. Thank you all, so so so so much for your support. I really didn't expect Nori would be so popular.**

**About this chapter, obviously I took liberties here. As far as I know there isn't much in the story to describe the dwarves halls. I just thought, if they live in mountains, surely it wouldn't be too far-fetched to believe they wouldn't have to go out with buckets to find water, right? So here come pipes (their abilities with metal are supposed to be unequaled, so why not?) and DaVinci's invention (which is true by the way, though I'm not sure I managed to explain it properly...if not, please do say so, I'll try and rewrite that part).**

**Other than that I hope you enjoyed this chapter as much as I enjoyed writing it :)**

**The next one will either be updated tomorrow or the day after at the latest (Saturday evening).**

**Thanks everyone for your support! It really means a lot!**


	6. Meet the Humans

**Everything belong's to JRR Tolkien, except for my OC and the plot**

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><p>When morning came, I felt refreshed and oddly at ease. My mind was entirely at peace and an unusual feeling of optimism was making me cheerful.<p>

I made my way to the kitchen, noticing it was entirely too silent for many dwarves to be there. When I pushed the door, I wasn't surprised at all to only find Ori. He looked up at me from his seat at the table when I came in and we greeted each other warmly.

"Are Dori and Nori at work already?' I asked while taking a seat which faced Ori.

-Dori is."

I quirked an eyebrow at his answer and kept observing him while helping myself to a healthy serving of bread, cheese, butter and honey. Ori looked sad, though he hid it well.

"And where is Nori?' I asked softly, sensing there was some issue there.

-Nori is…Nori is out."

That stunned me. Both the answer and the utterly defeated way Ori spoke were unexpected and took me by surprise.

"Where is he?' I couldn't help but ask.

-Who knows. Nori always.' Ori sighed deeply before continuing 'He's always coming and going as he pleases. It's always been like this since our mother's death."

I felt my heart clench at the look of helplessness Ori was displaying. I didn't like to see him like this. Still I could understand a part of his feelings; I had lost my parents too, even though I had been quite young back then. Danà had told me about their mother's death, and it wasn't difficult to guess that their father was probably dead too, otherwise he'd be around surely.

I cleared my throat and softly spoke words I knew wouldn't help, but that I still felt were true.

"I'm sorry for your mother."

Ori took several minutes to answer. The mood was definitely not cheery that morning.

"Our mother, she was a strong dwarf. She used to whack Nori behind the head when he was being too cheeky. She would pull on Dori's ear when she told him off.' Ori chuckled at that and I followed him.

-Are you telling me Dori would be scolded? I can't believe that.' I smiled warmly at Ori who mirrored it with a huge toothy grin.

-Aye, it's hard to imagine, right?"

We laughed softly together before Ori started to tell me some more about them. I found myself oddly eager to learn anything I could about the three brothers.

"Dori was really reckless when he was young. He always wanted to train to be a warrior, or a mercenary.

-Really?

-Yes, he would always try and sneak out of our home to follow the caravans of traders. He didn't want to be a merchant though he really wanted to be one of the warriors hired to protect them.

-I guess it does sounds like something he'd do, protecting everyone that is.

-Aye' Ori whispered softly, looking once more sad.

-What made him change his mind?' I asked him, hoping to bring him out of his forlorn thoughts.

-Our father's death."

Oh boy.

Well done Amelia.

I bit my lower lip and took a deep breath.

"Ori, I'm sorry, really.

-T'is fine. It's no secret, really, and it's been such a long time anyway.' He stopped at that and I couldn't quite decipher what he felt at the moment.

-How long has it been?' I whispered, feeling as if Ori might want to keep on talking.

-Our father died when I was eleven. Dori was barely eighty when he had to leave home and become a trader. It's very young for a dwarf, you know?"

I nodded. Truthfully, I didn't know. Eighty was plain old for me, but I guessed that people looking so fit past 150 would believe 80 to be young. Looking at Ori, I was glad I had guessed correctly; he clearly wanted to speak about those things. It made me wonder if he ever spoke about it. From what I could gather, Ori was young for a dwarf.

I had been really young too at my parents' death and had been meeting with a psychologist for years after the accident. Maybe Ori really needed to talk to someone who hadn't known them and who wouldn't hurt in the way his brothers surely would if they were to talk together.

In the end, Ori didn't give me enough time to speak, and just talked some more.

"He was a merchant you see' He started to explain.' And one day his group simply didn't come back. It took awhile to find out what had really happened, and even then we couldn't be sure anyway. Who could know what really occurred that day?

-So Dori chose to take back your father's activities?' My voice was barely above a whisper, just like Ori's.

-Well, yeah. He had to be the man of the family. He had to help our mother bring money and food home. It was difficult already at that time.

-What do you mean?

-Well. Have you heard of Erebor?' He asked me and I nodded. 'After that, our people had to run away. They stayed homeless for almost thirty years.

-Thirty years?' I couldn't help but exclaim.

-Aye. They had nowhere to go, nowhere they could stay. Until Thorin and Thrain, Thorin's father, decided to come here. The Blue Mountains had once been home for other dwarves. Thorin's father disappeared though, and in the end Thorin and the others found the caves here.

-Are you telling me that for thirty years your family had no real house?' I was still stunned by that information.

-Aye. Humans usually mock dwarves and say we don't have homes and we are used to wander the earth. Both my brothers were born during this period of wandering, though I don't think Nori remember any of it.

-That's…' I couldn't find words to express my shock. Had no one around helped the survivors, the refugees? How awful could people in this age and place be, going so far as to mock them?

-After Thorin decided to set a settlement here, things started to get a little better, but most of the dwarves still had to wander in order to find people who would trade with us. The others had to both try to build something out of the caves and work in the mines. Things have started to look better, only thirty, maybe forty years ago."

I remained silent. Of course Danà's tale had already given me an idea of how life had been for the dwarves. But she hadn't detailed the difficulties they had encountered after the attack on their mountain. I didn't really know how to feel about all those information Ori had just provided me with.

I was shocked by peoples' lack of interest in another community's obvious suffering.

Ori remained silent for awhile before talking once more about his brother.

"Dori, he really didn't have much choice. He had to give up what he wanted for us. At our father's death, he had to help in any way he could and he had no choice but to become a merchant like our father. Contracts with partners had already been signed, you see, so he only had to follow up and develop the trading agreements.' He sighed before repeating 'Dori really had no choice…

-I'm not sure."

The words had escaped my mouth without me being able to do anything to stop them. Ori looked up and sent me a questioning glance. I shrugged and explained my thoughts.

"You could say he chose to protect you all. Sounds cliché, but might be truer than you'd think. Taking care of you, of Nori and your mother, I think that's what motivated him too."

The silence that followed my statement stretched for several long minutes until Ori attempted a small smile at me and said a bit louder than before.

"You know, one day, Dori actually managed to sneak behind our father. I think he was around 70, maybe 75. He followed our father for quite some miles too. I don't remember it much, but when I was young, Nori would tell me how grumpy Dori had looked when Mother had walked all the way down to catch him. Nori said Dori's yelps were heard in all the Blue Mountains when mother brought him back home."

I laughed good-heartedly at the image of a younger Dori being forced back home by a bearded woman.

"Where were you then?

-I was still a wee child. Nori was taking care of me at the time. Nori and Dori always take care of me.' He sounded slightly grumpy when he said this last part and it made me smile.

-Don't tell me you'd rather they didn't care.' I was still smiling, I couldn't imagine Ori without his brothers by his side.

-I'd rather they'd care but acknowledge I'm an adult too." He pulled a face and I laughed.

Soon Ori was chuckling too. I smiled fondly at him and was just about to change topics when Ori asked me a question this time.

"Amelia, are you considered an adult where you come from?

-Yes. People reach adulthood at 18, or 21 depending on the country, hem kingdom, realm?' He nodded to let me know he had understood and then asked once more.

-And do you still live with your parents until you are married?

-Well…I did live with my aunt and uncle but…' I couldn't finish my sentence that Ori immediately asked.

-You didn't live with your Ma and Pa?"

Oh, Ori you're too much like me. You have a gift for asking questions. I couldn't feel offended or hurt though. First he couldn't have known. Second, I just had asked him similar things.

"Well, they both died when I was seven.

-Oh"

We were both rescued from this awkward situation when Dori came in. He had a frown on his face that disappeared when he saw Ori and me. Nori followed soon after, his face entirely blank. He did look slightly curious though when he saw Ori's face. Ori on the other hand was clearly surprised to see his second brother; he had obviously not expected it.

Glancing at Ori I could see that, despite his surprise at seeing both his brothers, he was still feeling bad and uneasy for bringing out my own parents death.

In order to cheer him up, and because there wouldn't be any harm done in that, I looked at Dori with a cheeky grin. He sent me a questioning glance and I smiled before asking him in a sweet voice.

"So, that time you sneaked after your father, how many miles did your mother have to run before she caught you and kicked you back here yelping loudly?"

Ori laughed joyously at Dori's red cheeks and I felt my heart lighten at seeing him like this. Even Nori couldn't help but chuckle a bit. Dori recovered quickly before answering with a very sweet tone too.

"Oh, Ori was remembering our childhood then. Did he tell you about the time he decided it'd be a good idea to practice his penmanship on mother's dress?"

I roared with laughter while Ori spluttered, cheeks as red as tomatoes.

The rest of that morning was filled with memories and laughter. Looking at the three smiling and chuckling brothers, I remember thinking the day couldn't get bad after such a start.

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><p>Later that day, Danà was eager to know how the brother had enjoyed their dinner. She had come to meet with me in the middle of the afternoon, and I had spent quite some time cleaning the apartment after lunch. Who said three men didn't dirty a place much? Suffice is to say I was happy to be distracted from my duties. I mock glared at her and related what had transpired the previous day.<p>

"I told you you'd be good to them' She chuckled teasingly.

-Well, at least Nori was nice enough to eat everything in his plate.' I shrugged while I finished tidying up the kitchen.

-Was he? Hmm"

I glanced at her but I could only distinguish sincere surprise on her face, though there seem to be something else shining in her eyes. I was about to ask her why she seemed so surprised but she was quicker than me. She stood up and grabbed my elbow, smiling warmly.

"Let's go Amelia. We wouldn't want to wait for all the stalls to be empty."

She guided me once more to the market, though we arrived a bit later than the day before. This time we went further in, going slowly in the direction of the massive entrance doors. Wandering around I ended up noticing cups, glasses, bowls and other tools made in silver and copper. It wasn't too far from the entrance but probably not one of the 'human tolerated' stands.

I could easily recognize the product sold by Dori at the shop in Beinne and I couldn't resist going toward that stand in order to have a better look.

"Those are amazing' I told Danà 'They're so detailed, I love them."

I was in front of the stall when I realized the merchant, or maybe the artisan, was here, I looked up to greet him when my eyes locked on his forehead.

I swear I felt all the blood leave my face.

My medical knowledge and common sense were telling me it just wasn't possible. My eyes were screaming the contrary.

The man had what looked like a metallic tool embedded in his head. Yet he was apparently breathing and very much alive.

"Hello…'I foolishly said and he huffed something I didn't catch.

-Bifur, this is Amelia. She's Balin and Dori's ward.' Danà told the man before whispering quickly to me 'Don't comment on the axe, I'll explain later.' Then loudly she said 'Amelia, this is Bifur. He's Bofur cousin.

-Oh. Hem hello then Bifur, I'm Amelia please…no hem, at your service."

I bowed slightly and heard a grunt followed by a few strange sounding words. Looking at Danà she seemed extremely pleased with something but I couldn't put my finger on it. I decided not to think about it too much, I really couldn't guess what was in that woman's head.

I wanted nothing more than to look at the merchandises on this stand, but the axe in this man's head disturbed me greatly. It even wobbled slightly when he moved and shrugged. My eyes were comically wide I imagine the first time I saw him nod. I swear I thought the axe would fall but no, it held its ground, firmly planted in his brain.

How could he be alive?

I could understand adrenaline shots that made normal people do incredible things, but that was a tad too much. That wasn't logical.

I shook my head, staring was rude and I didn't want to offend or upset the walking and breathing medical case study I had in front of me. Oh I wished I had all the equipment to have a proper look in his head.

I had to remind myself that dissecting someone who was alive would surely kill him, especially if it was the head you opened.

Trying to get out of my daydreaming I concentrated once more on the man's products. My eyes shifted from one object to another before I found at a corner of the small stand a few painted figurines.

"Oh, Danà, look at those! They're so beautiful."

Danà snorted while I asked the dwarf in front of me if I could hold one of the figurines to have a closer look. I took his non committed shrug for a yes and carefully grabbed one of the small figures.

It was heavier than I had thought it would be. I realized the figure was entirely made of metal, which one I didn't know, and had been carefully painted with an impressive attention to the smallest of details.

I put the small dwarf warrior back next to his friends and looked at the others. There was a taller figurine, still evidently representing a dwarf though, that looked to be made in a different material. I glanced at Bifur questioningly and earned a nod and axe wobble instead of simple 'yes'.

I took the second warrior which was lighter, probably made of wood, and I was surprised to discover, articulated.

"Those are Bifur's and Bofur's creations. Bifur make them and carve them, Bofur paint them and add the small details. Though, Bofur's quite good at whittling too, it's one of his hobbies.

-Those are superb, really. Do they make the plates and cups too?

-Yes, those are actually what they sell most. The toys, well they make them because they enjoy crafting them.' She glanced at Bifur before whispering to my ear 'And it sooth Bifur sometimes to concentrate on small figurines and toys."

I nodded, still completely enticed by the toys and not really paying attention to her words.

"I don't know whether I should be surprised that Bofur actually create toys.' I said smirking slightly.

-He's a child at heart, it makes sense for them to do that." Danà answered, smiling behind her beard.

Putting back the toys I saw small metallic beads next to them and didn't hesitate to grab one.

"Danà, would it be appropriate for me to have such beads in my hair?

-Not the one you took I'm afraid' she answered sincerely

-Why?

-The material. This one is made of copper. Copper is traditionally braided in young children, boys.' She explained patiently and I couldn't discern any mockery in her tone. 'Women would use other materials. Pearls and beads made of precious stones, ribbons for the youngest, otherwise silver and gold are common to both men and women, though more used among women on a daily basis.

-I didn't know it'd be so complicated to find a bead' I smiled

-We should find you something to put in your hair. Don't you ever braid them?

-Well, I only know how to make a basic braid, and I'm not really good at it.

-You should have told me, I'll show you if you wish.

-Remember the last time I asked someone to help me? I don't think Nori forgot it." I smirked, blushing a bit as this whole story still embarrassed me a little.

Danà laughed heartily and I heard the dwarf, Bifur, grunt something while looking questioningly at us. Danà quickly and lowly spoke in this foreign language I couldn't understand. When she finished explaining whatever it was she wanted to say, Bifur started to laugh too.

He was bent in two, hands clutching at his belly, shaking with laughter. My eyes though were completely caught in the sight of the piece of axe that was positively jiggling up and down. At some point I felt my hand lift on its own volition.

I was entirely hypnotized by the sight of the piece of metal and I could only be a silent witness when my hand made its way towards the dwarf's head.

Hadn't it been for Danà slapping said unceremonious hand away, I think I would actually have pushed and probed at the poor man's forehead.

Under Danà's disapproving glance though, I cleared my throat and put both my hands behind my back, looking rather sheepish, I did send her way an apologetic smile. I was glad to realize she wasn't offended, merely amused and slightly exasperated by my antics.

Thankfully Bifur hadn't realized anything; he was way too occupied laughing. After awhile, Danà let the dwarf chuckle on his own and turned back to me. She looked pensive for a minute before shaking her head a bit.

"Anyway,' she said simply 'you should ask Dori and Balin to braid your hair.

-What? No way I'm ever going to ask that to anyone! Ever! ' I said eliciting a chuckle in Danà who explained gently.

-You need to have a braid indicating you're someone's ward. This way everyone would know you've been welcomed in our halls. Dori and Balin would have to do it soon.

-Seriously? You have a special braid to show you're someone's ward? I thought all those people were present during the oath in order to then tell everyone.

-It's different. They'll tell there's a human who has been accepted as a ward. That's not nearly as precise as you having a braid that'll claim your guardianship to all dwarves around."

Danà smirked and then continued to explain.

"Braids, hair and beards are extremely important in our culture, I'm sure you already guessed as much. Beads are an inherent part of the braids. A large steel beaded braid in a warrior's beard will indicate his rank and status in battle.

-So Gloin for example?' I asked remembering the various decorations in the dwarf's voluminous beard.

-My husband is a gifted warrior.' She said proudly 'He's captain of the guards. He's in charge of their training mostly but goes out on special mission too."

I won't lie. I was impressed.

I was starting to be really curious about their weird culture. On one hand they were loud and blunt, on the other they were putting extra attention on details and had a sort of mute sub culture that was focused only on hairdo. What a strange world.

"Then what kind of bead can I take?

-How old are you exactly?

-25."

Her eyes widened significantly and she exclaimed.

"So young? Oh dear you're a child still.

-What? I'm not! Please remember I'm human…

-Still. Well ribbons wouldn't do, unless there sewn with gold or silver threads. We could use some coloured leather first. I don't think it'll be a good idea for you to directly wear some more meaningful beads.

-I shouldn't stand out too much, that's what you mean.' I said with a smile.

-Yes.' She looked a bit sheepish 'Wait a bit and then we'll see. If Oin takes you as an apprentice and you later become a healer, then you'll have some particular braids and beads to wear.

-I'm starting to believe I'll never remember everything there is to remember about braids." I joked, making her laugh.

We discussed some more and she guided me to a stand where we bought some long leather strands that were braided together three by three in larger threads. I could use those in my hair. She handed them to me and I happily looked at the small designs that the dwarf had managed to carve even in the thinnest of those strands.

I was still analyzing them thoroughly when Danà patted my shoulder and told me.

"I have a few things to buy, food mostly' Danà then asked 'Do you wish to follow me or would you rather wander a bit alone?

-Oh, I'd like to have a look at some of the jewels over there' I said pointing toward the entrance.

-Alright but don't go wandering too far away, it wouldn't do if I lost you on your second day here."

I laughed at that, she sounded just like my aunt did when I was but a child. It felt so familiar that a nice, warm filling spread in my chest. When I saw though, that Danà was genuinely worried I put a hand on her shoulder and tried to reassure her.

"Don't worry Danà. After all, you can't lose me: I'm the only non bearded woman around."

She laughed at that and agreed to leave me alone on that side of the market before going quickly back at the other side, in the part where food was sold.

I looked at her disappearing back before gesturing a goodbye from afar to Bifur who huffed and then turned around and headed for the jewels stands. Well I was a woman in a city renowned for its jewellers. I was curious.

I hummed an undefined tune under my breath while happily walking toward the stands. Those were nearest to the entrance with the weapons smiths' stands; apparently men around bought weapons and jewels. Maybe they needed one to defend the other…who knows.

I was amazed by the quality of the products, their intricate designs, the precision and details given to each piece. I was far from being an expert but those were really the most beautiful necklaces, bracelets and brooches I had ever seen. I was awed in front of the stand.

I don't know how long I stayed there, going from one piece to the other, marvelling over each of them and saying so to the dwarf who simply smiled proudly and nicely at me.

I knew it was late in the afternoon though and I started to wonder why Danà hadn't come back already. I stepped a bit away from the stalls; I wanted to have a look at the view of the valley from the entrance. Glancing through the massive doors I could see the sky starting to darken at the horizon and some bright stars were already appearing. The entrance faced the east, I could tell as much easily; the sunset was nowhere in sight and the few sunrays were peeking from the other side of the mountains. It was late.

Down in the valley I could see the town of men that had settled here after the dwarves had come. There were fields and a small, clear river on the left side of town but not too far on the right a large forest covered the landscape in shades of green. The road getting down from the Halls' entrance to town was paved with blue veined stones. It was beautiful.

I took a few steps outside before turning slowly back inside, back to the jeweller's stall.

I was deep in thought when a hand brutally fell on my shoulder, startling me, and a gruff voice spoke loudly in my ear. A cold shiver ran down my spine.

"What are you still doing here? Come on, quickly, go back home."

I looked, startled, at the man whose hand was pushing me outside the doors. Why was he touching me? Why was he pushing me out? Who was he? I could see easily with his height that he was human and immediately hated how he towered over me. It took me some time to understand what was happening and I was already outside the doors and on the paved road when I started to struggle in his grip.

"Leave me alone' I said, trying to push his hand away 'I'm living there."

He laughed at me and I realized the sound seemed to echo around. Befuddled I looked around and saw that there were three of them.

"Right, you're a dwarf maiden living in the halls of the mighty dwarves.' one of them joked.

-Come on lass, quickly go home before the dwarves kick you out.' the third one simply said.

-No, you don't understand.' I tried to explain while pushing as hard as I could against the man's grip.

-Your family we'll be worried.' the one who held me gruffly said.

-But I don't have any family here. I'm living with the dwarves now!"

Those stupid men were really starting to annoy me, especially the one who had my shoulder in a death grip. He was hurting me and I couldn't escape his hold, especially now that his second hand held my arm.

"You're an orphan?' The third man asked, leering at me.

-Yes, well, not really. It's complicated.

-Are your parents around? He insisted.

-No, but…' I couldn't say more as the one holding me exclaimed.

-Oh. So you're an orphan and you thought it'd be nice to go have a look at the dwarves. Well you had your fun lass, so now leave them alone. They don't like humans wandering their halls aimlessly.

-But that's what you don't understand…

-No, you don't understand.' He said and suddenly turned me to face him. 'Dwarves wouldn't appreciate you putting your nose in the bloody holes they call home. If they're pissed then their prices go up and if their prices go up then I'm pissed. Do you want me to be pissed lass?"

He was shaking me violently now.

He was hurting me. My arms were held too tightly, too strongly and my neck burnt from the strain imposed by the violent shaking.

This man was mental; I knew I should have taken this psychiatry option back in uni. He was hurting me but something stopped me from yelling and calling for help. I had absolutely no idea how he'd react to me screaming and I didn't wish to die because he was too stupid to listen to me.

"Do you want to anger me lass?" he asked, still shaking me like a Polaroid picture.

"No, no I'm sorry" I managed to say.

I was immensely grateful when he stopped. I didn't dare look up at him and I couldn't help but notice he still hadn't freed me from his painful grip on my arms. I already knew I would bruise, badly. I quickly glanced at the two other men. One had long grey hair that fell like rat tails on his shoulders and a badly broken nose. He was thin and had a scary glint in his eyes.

The third had an ugly scar that ran on his cheek and chin and missed several teeth. The three of them, including Mr Deathgrip and his angry angular face, were the perfect pictures of medieval villains in movies. Dirty, terribly smelly and incredibly creepy. They reeked of sweat and other odours I didn't dare to identify.

"What should we do with her?" Scarface asked.

To my utter horror they actually started to discuss what they should do with me without even bothering asking for my opinion.

"She's an orphan, so she has no one to go to.' Rat-tails said.

-If I let you go your way, are you going to try and sneak back in the dwarves' halls?' Deathgrip asked me.

-No, never!" I replied automatically.

He seemed to consider my answer for a minute, staring at me with angry eyes. I was completely lost as to what to do. I wasn't prepared to face such a situation and these men were far from behaving in a familiar way. To me they were entirely unpredictable, and that meant they scared me.

I had just one plan to get out of this situation, and that was to try and stall for time as much as possible. Danà was bound to look for me and surely someone would have seen these men forcing me out. Then it hit me. Why would the dwarves pay attention to men's business? For the dwarves I was human, surely for them it wasn't even worth notice that I had been guided outside by three men.

I had been stupid enough not to react and make a scene. I wanted to kick myself. How could I be such a fool? Really it seemed suddenly that I deserved to be kidnapped by the three ugly villains just because I was stupid enough to let them.

Deathgrip's words brought me back to focus.

"I don't believe you"

A feeling of dread started to pool in my stomach. What were they going to do? I knew my face was white as a sheet and my situation seemed to worsen every minute. Scarface then asked his friend.

"What should we do with her then?

-If we let her go, she'll sneak in the dwarf's territory." Deathgrip grumbled.

I tried to shook my head no to make him understand I wouldn't but his glare stopped me. I could feel painful stabs in my arms where he was violently clutching me. There was absolutely no way for me to break free of his hold. He was way too strong.

"Then we can take her with us. She has no family to claim her anyway." Rat-tails said.

Scared didn't even come close to describe what I was feeling. I was properly terrified. Did this man just say what I thought he said? Did they actually think I'd follow them to whatever hole, rock or dung they called their house? Did they actually believe I could be claimed like an object or property?

Now didn't seem like a good time to realize that apparently, here, such 'claims' were natural. My mind was whirling with thoughts, yet I couldn't utter one word to express myself.

Wait, where these three men even remotely as honourable as the dwarves had been? I felt as if I couldn't breathe normally anymore.

"Aye. We ought to take her with us. Take care of her. Poor lass alone in this dangerous world" Deathgrip said smirking in a way that had a cold shiver ran down my spine.

"No" I squeaked before he shook me once, more violently than before and I yelped.

I didn't have any more time to protest as he tugged at my arms, forcing me to follow them as I tried my best to struggle away. He probably saw me inhale as much hair as I could and guessed I was about to scream for he pressed his disgusting hand on my face and squeezed my face painfully.

"Don't even try to make a scene, lass. No one can claim you, so no one will bother to ask why you scream."

I looked at him with wide eyes and I swear he smiled gleefully when he saw how afraid I was.

As I was forced to follow them in the direction of the men's village, I glanced quickly behind me, extremely upset to see the doors of Thorin's Halls disappear in the shadows of the night. Tears menaced to pool in my eyes and I swallowed them back as best as I could, biting harshly on my bottom lip to avoid screaming and thus risking angering them.

What was going to happen now?

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><p><strong>AN: Once more I want to thank the people who reviewed or added alerts on this story! It's really great to feel such support and it makes me wants to keep on writing and updating. :) Thanks to you all**

**So, I hope everyone appreciated the change in atmosphere. I wanted to add some more details about the Ri brothers, I hope it didn't disappoint anyone. **

**From now on things will start to move a bit more...**

**I'll probably update tomorrow. :) **


	7. Dwarves don't cuddle

**I do not own anything, it all belongs to JRR Tolkien. I only own my OC and the plot.**

**WARNING: Violence vaguely described. **

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><p>I was probably one of the unluckiest persons to exist. Or the stupidest.<p>

First I had found my way to this place which was oh so conveniently stuck in middle age era. Then I had embarrassed myself in front of the people I wanted to make a good impression on, repeatedly of course.

And now this.

The three awful men were still forcing me to follow them. I tried to reign on my fears and forced my brain to think about a way to get out of this situation. Surely when we'll enter the village, someone would help me if I yelled and fought tooth and nails. Maybe they wouldn't deliver me, but someone would go and tell the dwarves what was happening. Right?

My hopes were crushed in an instant when we didn't pass across the village. Gone were my opportunities to call for help. Now we were walking in the direction of the nearby forest. I had troubles following behind these men long strides. Each time I would stumble on the uneven ground, Deathgrip would yank at my arm to the point I thought he would rip it off. My shoulder was burning under the pain but I clenched my teeth, determined not to yelp.

They guided me through the foliage for awhile, entering the forest grounds. It took me some time to discern four equines forms and the low light of a small campfire further ahead. Night had fallen now and the shadows of the trees didn't help me see anything. At that moment I saw a human silhouette, crouched next to the fire.

Great, now there were four of them, I thought as my gaze fell upon the man. He was as creepy looking as the others; he was shorter and fatter, his shirt was soiled with grease and probably other substances I didn't want to recognize.

My thoughts were focused on one thing only. I was trying to find a way to escape from them when Deathgrip called Fatty loudly.

"Look what we found lurking around the Beggars' Halls." He joked before harshly pushing me towards the fourth man.

I stumbled and ungracefully fell on the ground in a heap. At that moment I realized that during all that time I had held onto the leather ribbons Danà had bought for me. The ribbons were now dispersed in front of me; I had released my grip on them when I fell, trying to use my hands to absorb some of the shock and avoid hurting myself too badly.

I had felt a sudden sting in my left palm when it connected with the ground and I just knew I had opened it on a sharp rock or another similar object. When I said I was lucky, I didn't lie…

I bit back a curse and quickly looked around for an escape route.

Objectively I knew my chances were slim, I didn't know anything about fighting and had never been good in any sports. My brain was my only chance, I had to outwit those men, but right now my mind was quite hindered by fear. Still I knew I'd be safe if I could just run back to the village, or better still, Thorin's Halls.

"Tch, look at that, the lass even brought some bracelets for tonight." Scarface exclaimed while stooping down and grabbing one of the leather ribbons and holding it for his friends to see.

What did he mean by that?

I stared at him with wide, frightened eyes when it finally dawned on me.

No. No bloody way I'd let them bind me.

I started to crawl backwards and scrambled, trying to stand up. They were laughing loudly at my obvious fear. I was just barely standing once more when Rat-tails took a few strides and grabbed me, wrenching at my wrists. This time I couldn't hold back my cry of pain. Worst though was the fact that I couldn't even have the opportunity to start running.

Hell these men had no notion of force. Every time they put their dirty hands on me they hurt, quite a lot.

I winced and tried to free my arms, just to have him squeeze my wrists more brutally. He laughed loudly at my face and threw me towards Scarface. I ended up falling on the ground at their feet once more.

Suddenly I started to feel shame as well. I couldn't believe I was so weak, so pathetic, but my blood was too frozen by fear for me to react in any kind of heroic way.

Deathgrip pulled violently on my arm to force me to stand. Between Scarface and him, it didn't take them long to bind my wrists together in front of me. The leather bit my skin and I stopped struggling quickly when I realized they had bound the strings tightly enough to cut the blood circulation and potentially break my skin if I tugged on it too hard.

"You can't do this. You have no right." I whispered, astonished at the whole situation.

I couldn't comprehend what was happening. It all occurred so fast. It was surreal. One minute I was looking at beautiful jewellery and landscape and the next these brutes were taking me away.

Oh my god, Danà. Danà would believe I had run away and would tell so to the three brothers. Dori, Nori and Ori would think I had broken our contract. They'd think I had left them. They wouldn't look for me. No one would.

No one would come and rescue me.

I started to tremble violently and fell on my knees. The men probably thought it was some kind of sign that I was resigned to my fate. They gathered around the fire, ignoring me completely and started to talk loudly together while one of them was putting a cauldron on top of the flames.

If no one would rescue me, that meant one thing, I had to rescue myself. I had to try anything I could.

I shifted slightly, testing my legs, readying myself to jump and sprint back in the direction of the village. It wasn't too far. If I was quick enough, and lucky, then maybe, just maybe I could outrun these men and reach the village. Once there, someone was bound to help me.

I took a deep breath and slowly started to stand. The men didn't pay attention to me. I observed them and, seeing that they were busy preparing their diner, I bolted.

"Hey!" I heard one of them yell before uttering a curse.

For a second I thought my plan would work.

It didn't.

I had barely run ten meters that one of them was yanking hard on my long hair.

I yelled loudly and fell on the ground as the tug had made me stumble backwards, destabilizing my precarious balance. I felt my hip painfully hit some rocks and I yelped some more. Tears menaced to fall from my eyes but I managed somehow to stop them. I even managed to send a hateful glare to the bastard, Scarface, who simply snickered.

He didn't bother to grab my arm this time and just kept on yanking on my hair as if it were some kind of rope, forcing me to crawl at his feet like an animal. He sent me back rolling on the rocky ground to his friends' feet.

Another one, Rat-tails, grabbed my hands and yanked me up again before throwing me next to a log where the horses were kept. There he attached a rope to my wrists, tugging on it to make sure I couldn't escape. When he was done I looked at him, hoping he would reconsider I whispered

"Please, please let me go. My friends…"

He backhanded me, sending me to the ground in a heap.

I didn't say anything else. Head held low I couldn't hold the tears back anymore.

My cheek was burning and sending tendrils of pain in my head. My mind was swarming with awful thoughts of what these men could possibly do to me. I was quivering, shaking like a leaf really. I do not think I had ever been so scared in my whole life. Even the cave accident was nothing compared to the terror I was experiencing right now.

Bending to the point my forehead almost touched the grass, I pressed my hands tightly on my mouth, attempting to muffle my cries as I didn't want these men to pay any attention to me.

I didn't understand. I couldn't understand. How could they treat me or anyone really, like this? It felt as if I was nothing but some meat, some animal, or some bloody object to use and discard at will.

I was completely lost in my terrified daze, which probably explains why I didn't realize at first that new people had arrived at the men's camp. The sound of a particular voice broke me free from my terror though and I looked up again.

Hope. I dared not hope, but it still welled up in me, trying to crush every other feelings.

"What are you doing here? We have no more business to do with you for now.' Deathgrip grunted.

-We are looking for one of our own.' Dori politely said.

-There's no dwarf here!" Scarface snapped

I couldn't risk it. I couldn't stay stunned at their presence and silent if that meant they might not see me. I was in the shadows, tied to a log and between horses; it was possible they simply wouldn't see me.

I had to speak up.

"Dori, Nori, Gloin!" I exclaimed, my voice strangled, trying to stand up but failing as the rope was too short. I was forced to kneel next to the log, my arms bent in an odd way to allow me to look at the dwarves.

I saw Nori's eyes find mine and I was shocked at the fury in them. I shrunk. Were they that angry with me? Did that mean they would abandon me? Surely they wouldn't have come to find me to abandon me…unless they just wanted to break the contract and be done with me. But it didn't make sense for them to do that. My mind was crowded with thoughts and possibilities to the point that I could barely think at all.

I felt my lower lip starting to tremble and I bit it. I was trying hard to focus on the discussion that took place near the fire. It felt as if my life was being gambled under my very eyes and I had no power over the result of the bet.

"I never said we were looking for a dwarf.' Dori continued unperturbed 'Now, please kindly release our ward from her bounds."

I hadn't known Dori for a long time, but I had never heard such a stern, deadly serious tone in his voice. I guessed he would have made a damn good mercenary with such a scary tone.

"She's an orphan. You have no claim on her." Rat-tails grunted.

"She's our ward and has been sworn under the protection of King Thorin. Release her!" Gloin ordered.

I could see with horror that Fatty and Scarface had drawn long swords out of their scabbards. Gloin was lazily holding on his axe, a very small axe, while Nori had his arms crossed on his chest and Dori held two small and fragile looking swords. I suddenly felt more scared for them than for myself. I wouldn't be able to live with myself if they died because of me.

"Why should I care about that Beggar King" Deathgrip snorted and then spat on the floor at Dori's feet.

Oh…bad move.

I could easily observe the effect of his words on the three dwarves. Yep, they had been angry and furious, now they were positively livid. The men had apparently broken an important cultural rule 'don't badmouth the King'.

"You. Will. Release. Her. Now." Dori enunciated in a steely voice.

"Or what?" Rat-tails stupidly taunted them.

"Or nothing" Gloin casually answered.

The ginger dwarf was playing with his small axe, lifting it and tossing it a few inches in the air above his hand before catching it again. The whole area was silent and my eyes seemed to be glued to Gloin's axe which seemed to always go higher and higher in the air at each playful throw he made. Then, before my brain could actually register his moves, he suddenly threw the small axe in Rat-tails' direction.

In the same swift move he had brought his hands behind his back and retrieved a massive axe that had been hidden until then. I gasped.

Then I turned quickly away when I saw the small axe had embedded itself deeply in Rat-tails' chest. The dwarves shouted some war cry and there was a fury of sounds. I heard rapid steps coming in my direction and I felt a hand grab my hair. I had just the time to yelp before a terrifying shout echoed from behind my back. I heard some more scuffles sounds and I could easily imagine what a gory scene was being played right behind me. I remained unmoving, entirely frozen.

Soon enough there was an eerie silence, broken by a whimper that ended in a disgusting gurgle. I didn't need to look around to know what medieval weapons could inflict and I didn't have the strength to look and see my friends' dead bodies on the ground. The thought only made my stomach churn and I suddenly felt a violent nausea.

I tried to take a deep breath but my nostrils were assaulted by a tangy smell I knew too well. Blood. Usually it wouldn't have bothered me, but knowing it might be Dori's, Nori's or Gloin's made me want to scream.

My eyes were wide open, staring unseeingly at my bound wrists. I startled violently when a hand softly pressed my shoulder.

"Amelia?"

I turned as quickly as I could; wrenching my own arms against my bonds, a burning sting made me aware I had most certainly cut my wrists on the leather strings. I didn't care though as soon as I found myself looking directly in Nori's grey eyes. The fury I had seen earlier had entirely disappeared and I was relieved to only discern concern and worry in them. From the corner of my eyes I saw Dori and Gloin coming closer.

"Nori…" I whimpered.

I realized then that Nori held two long, weirdly shaped daggers; the blades seemed to be curved at the middle. He quickly wiped them of the blood that coated them and sheathed one back before kneeling next to me and swiftly cutting the rope that held me to the fallen log. The tension I had put on my shoulders to be able to face him eased away and I breathed in relief. He was about to cut the leather strings when I whispered sadly.

"Danà bought them for me"

Nori glanced at me before swiftly sheathing his second dagger and started to silently work on the knots. It hurt when the last one fell on the ground and the blood rushed back in my fingers. I moaned and felt tears gather once more in my eyes.

The silence of the dwarves was starting to terrify me some more. The sheer amount of emotions battling in my chest was just too much for me to withstand. Suddenly I started to break into violent sobs but still managed to say or rather stutter.

"I'm so…so…so sorry…"

Nori immediately gathered me in his arms and started to caress my hair, shushing me and soothing me softly. I could feel Dori behind me, patting my back and rubbing his hand in soothing circles on it.

I don't know how long they waited for me to calm down a little but at some point I realized I had my nose buried in Nori's shoulder, basically rubbing my face on his tunic. I tried to get up, muttering another watery 'sorry', but his hand prevented me to get away.

I finally relaxed against his chest while he held me tightly against him. I pressed myself closer still, trying to lose myself in his warmth when I felt so cold with fear and shock. Nori's presence was unwavering and so real it kept me whole and soothed me. I hid my face against him, closing my eyes and feeling the beads of his beard pressed against my cheek.

I could hear Gloin speak not too far from us and his grave, gruff voice stirred me from my shocked daze.

"Well, Thorin will be glad. We finally got rid of those ruffians."

I think it was Dori who answered with a grunt while still trying to sooth me.

"We should bring her to my brother" Gloin added then.

I perked up and was ashamed to hear my own squeaky and shaky voice. I sounded like a little girl who just had a nightmare. Well I supposed it wasn't far from that.

"Are they…you know…

-Dead. Yes they are.' Nori answered matter-of-factly and I whimpered.

-I'm so sorry. I didn't mean to…oh my god what are you going to do?" I was aware I was rambling, but my mind was quite the mess at that moment.

I could only think about all the problems and troubles I had just caused to my friends. Then the very idea of them being put in jails because of me made me cry some more. In between two sobs I managed to clutch at Nori's tunic and wailed.

"I don't want you to go in jail…"

I didn't see their stunned faces but Dori patted me some more before softly speaking.

"Why would we go in jail missy?

-You ki…kill…killed those bastards…' I cried aloud

-Well, we won't go to jail for that I assure you."

That broke through my cloudy mind. I glanced up at Nori, stupefied.

"What? Why?

-Amelia, they attacked our ward. With your oath and contracts, you are now sworn under the dwarves' protection. They had no right to take you away.' Dori patiently explained in a gentle, calming voice.

-And we had every right to rip them to pieces." Gloin added with a disturbingly happy smirk.

I blinked at them and simply nodded. I seriously didn't have the willpower to ponder on this. I put this piece of information in the back of my head and chose to forget about it for now. Feeling suddenly exhausted I sighed and let my head fall back on Nori's shoulder, my eyes closing on their own volition.

I felt safe with them, even though they had just 'ripped to pieces' men who were bigger than them. I didn't care they had just killed four men, I was just glad they had came for me and didn't look like they would throw me away in the next few minutes.

I somehow registered through my hazy thoughts that Nori had picked me up and was holding me against his chest. I marvelled at his strength when I felt that he was moving, quite probably walking back toward the Halls. I dozed off for a bit only to stir and awaken when I heard another known voice.

"How's the lass?"

Was that Bofur? Were where we?

"She got quite a fright.' Dori answered while Gloin grunted.

-Bofur?' I whispered questioningly peeking up from Nori's shoulder.

-Aye."

I looked around to find out we were at the edge of the men's village. There were three other dwarves there, Bofur, Bifur and Ori. The youngest one quickly came to me and gingerly poked my shoulder.

"Are you alright?" He asked, clearly unsure

I nodded, trying to force a smile on my face but miserably failing to do so. As Nori started to walk once more, the other surrounded us, talking together. I could hear Gloin recalling the battle and found out then that Deathgrip had been slaughtered by an angry Nori while Fatty had met Dori's precise blades. Scarface had gotten acquainted with Gloin massive axe, suffice is to say that his scars were now indiscernible.

I let Nori's strides lull me back into a peaceful doze while the other's rumbling voices reassured me.

* * *

><p>I came back to reality when I felt myself being torn away from Nori's warmth. I startled and tried to jump back in his direction only to have his warm hands pushing on my shoulders and back on what I realized to be a bed. Looking around I found out we were now in an unknown room, but the ceiling was such an example of dwarf's craft that I soon relaxed. I was back within the halls and that was enough.<p>

Turning my head slightly I met with Nori's grey eyes. He was evidently worried about me and I smiled to reassure him.

"Don't worry' I managed to whisper 'It's only a few bruises, scratches and a big scare."

It felt strange in a way to be the one to reassure him. Truth was I didn't feel alright, I had been really scared by those men, mostly because of the fact I didn't know what to expect and I certainly never had thought that such a thing could happen. It had been a rude awakening to how people in this era behaved, but my rational mind could tell it had been necessary.

The whole uncertainty and surprise had made me react in such a frightened and helpless way. Now, I knew what to expect and I would prepare myself to those eventualities I hadn't thought about. Now I saw the differences between how men and dwarves treated womenfolk.

How odd to think I trusted dwarves more than men.

Nori nodded but didn't move away. He stayed beside me but avoided to look at me, I didn't understand his reaction but was frankly too tired to ask. Dori's voice caught my attention then and I turned to the other side to look at an unknown dwarf.

"She's been hurt by those scoundrels' Dori was saying

-What squirrels? There're no squirrels in the halls…"

The second dwarf's answer took me by surprise and I couldn't stop a small laugh to bubble out of my chest. The dwarf with grey hair and beard glanced at me and smiled. He had bushy hair and only two braids in his moustache and beard that curled back up at the end. He shooed Nori and Dori away, ordering them out of the room.

The two brothers clearly didn't like it but had no other choices. Oin, as I found his name was, had authority here and he didn't mind using it. When we were alone, he turned towards me once more and produced from one of his pocket a sort of trumpet like thingy. I understood what it was used for when he put it against his ear and approached the bed.

"So my dear. They tell me you're a healer apprentice."

I hadn't expected that. I thought he would want to examine me after my little meeting with the local fauna. If he saw my surprise he didn't comment on it, patiently waiting for me to speak.

"Well, I was studying the human body and the ways to heal it."

He nodded at that and gestured at my body.

"So, what do you suffer from?"

One of my eyebrows was raised as I looked at him questioningly but his face didn't give anything away. Was this really the time to have some sort of interview? I guessed for him it was.

"Well, I have some minor cuts on my hands and wrists from a fall on stones and from the leather threads. Then there's probably a growing bruise on my face right now and some more of those on my arms, shoulders and probably knees and hip too. Nothing major really."

He kept silent, nodding at my words before he hummed and asked.

"What would you do then?

-Well, the cuts are really small, I'd clean them with clear water, boiled water mind you.' I added remembering that water here was not treated before muttering. 'There's really no need to stitch them…' I went to keep on when he spoke.

-You know how to stitch wounds?

-Yes.' I answered simply.

-Good, good. Continue.

-For the bruises, well if we were in my home I know what I'd put on it to lessen the pain and quicken the healing, but here? I guess I'll just leave them alone."

He was silent again then he hummed and went to a nearby cabinet and opened it. He rummaged through it, putting out a sort of jar and a metallic bowl before taking the bowl back outside.

I stayed alone for a few minutes, hearing muffled voices from the other room, before Oin came back in with the bowl and white linens. He gestured to me to sit down and I obeyed as quickly as I could.

"The water we keep here in the wards is boiled before we store it in those corked copper vases." He said, setting what I now realized was a copper bowl on a small table closed to my bed.

He gestured for me to show my hands and I did so without complain. He looked at the wounds for a short time before starting to clean them, beginning with my left hand. I winced slightly when he had to remove a small pebble from it. I bit my lip when he tugged on a small twig that had pierced below the skin. Blood had already started to dry.

Then he quickly cleaned it with fresh water and did my slightly hurt wrists at the same time. Gingerly, he took the jar and opened it. A nice smell was brought to my nose and I tried to identify it.

"This is a balm made with thyme and witch hazel mostly. That will soothe the pain and prevent any swelling and infection.

-thyme and witch hazel, alright.' I said, genuinely curious and interested.

-Had your cuts been bigger, I would have used honey to prevent infection and help the wound to heal quicker.' He explained was bandaging my hand and wrists.

-Honey?

-Yes. Now, for your bruises specifically, you can apply this other balm' he said while standing up and rummaging some more in the cabinet 'it's made with wild indigo and witch hazel."

I nodded and took the smaller jar he handed me.

"There's no need to apply much of it, just a bit is enough' he continued 'and have Dori prepare some of his beloved chamomile, it'll do you good."

I smiled at that and nodded. Yes, chamomile will do well for more than one reason. Chamomile was familiar, it was home, and it was safety. I needed that right now. I was about to ask him some more question when the door was jerked opened and to my utter horror I saw the King stride in.

"Oin' he nodded to the healer before looking at me 'I didn't think I'd see you back quite so soon Miss Amelia."

I gulped. This man scared me horribly. I knew he wasn't here to harm me, not much at least, but still his presence was overwhelming. He seemed to note my unease and chose to sit down next to me and asked in a softer voice.

"Explain what happened."

I swallowed and looked at my hands that still held the jar of balm given by Oin.

"I don't understand what happened sir. I was just looking at the jewellery and then I took a few steps out to look at the landscape… I swear I didn't even see these men. I was coming back in when Deathgrip forced me out of the market and told me you'd be angry if a human went too far inside. He pulled me all the way down, saying that if I was an orphan then they had the right to take me. I tried to tell them sir, I swear I told them I was living here, but they didn't believe me. And then they brought me to their camp and Dori, Nori and Gloin arrived a bit later."

I had talked at an amazing pace, getting everything out in just a few breathes. I was afraid of his reaction as I had no idea how he would react. Strangely enough the first word he spoke had me look at him puzzled.

"Deathgrip?"

I blinked a few times, trying to gather my thoughts.

"You said Deathgrip forced you out' He insisted and I finally understood.

-Oh' I blushed 'It's just, I didn't know their names. And he was quite strong and…well"

I turned my gaze back to my hands, embarrassed at my own foolishness. His next gesture stunned me though.

He gently took a few strands of my hair in his hand and said.

"You should have had Dori and Balin braid your hair already. That would have not prevented these men to act, but the dwarves around would have been quicker to react."

I looked at him questioningly

"I don't understand.' I frowned.

-As Balin's and Dori's ward, they should have made a braid here, behind your ear and put one bead each in it. The dwarves around would have recognize you as a ward of our kin, they wouldn't have let you being pulled out.

-Oh" I couldn't find another word.

I cleared my throat, and seeing that the King hadn't banished me yet I gathered my courage and asked him.

"What happened? Here I mean. How did you know where to look?"

To my surprise a small smirk graced his features, but it quickly disappeared and his face was back to its usual stern expression.

"You caused quite a stir Miss Amelia. Danà was running around in worry and informed Gloin of the situation. Of course they had to tell the Ri's brothers.' He snorted here before adding 'Danà was in quite a state until Lofà, the jeweller, arrived with Bifur."

I felt my eyebrows going all the way up to my hairline. Had I really caused such troubles to so many people? The King continued his tale, not reacting to my surprise.

"Lofà went to ask Bifur who you were; he said he was surprised to see such a young and nice missy with such a crowd of renowned ruffians.' At that a smirk tugged at the King's lips, he quickly continued. 'He had seen you speaking for awhile with Danà at Bifur's stand apparently. When Bifur told him you were Dori's ward, they immediately went to tell Gloin what happened. And then they all knew where to search for you."

We remained silent for a few minutes before he spoke once more.

"I hadn't seen those three brothers so worried in awhile. Even Bofur, who had simply come to meet his cousin, was in a frenzied state once he found out what happened. Even Bifur was quite eager to go and kill those mercenaries. I believe he'd be upset to have missed the fight.

-I'm really sorry for all the trouble I caused.' I whispered closing my eyes in shame.

-What's done is done. Besides, those men were bad business. They often caused trouble in the village and have been causing fights and brawls every time they came." He said angrily, but I knew his anger wasn't directed at me.

I looked at him, stunned to see he actually didn't care at all about their death and the fact that I had been the primary cause of it.

"Be careful from now on and get that braid. I believe Oin has accepted you as an apprentice so you'd have something useful to do." He finally said, standing up.

This man was weird. I couldn't decide whether he was nice or not. He seemed gruff and stern, yet he had taken the time to come see me and hadn't even scolded me. He was a total mystery to me. He was almost at the door when I cleared my throat and told him

"Thank you. I will do my best to help master Oin."

He simply nodded before going out. As soon as he had left, the door burst open once more and I was literally buried under bearded faces. Danà was amongst the first at my side.

"Oh my poor child.' She said, caressing my face 'My poor, poor child. How are you feeling?

-I'm fine Danà, don't worry.' I smiled softly at her.

-You're hurt, they hurt you!" Exclaimed Ori sadly while he pointed at my hands.

This little sentence had quite impressive results. Danà squeezed me in her arms, while Bofur and Gloin cursed loudly and started to grumble beneath their breath. Bifur was shaking his head with a deep frown on his face, making his axe wobble from side to side. Dori was hovering close by, sadness and was it guilt? Overly present on his gentle face.

I could see that Balin was here too, and I guessed it was normal as I was his ward too. He looked really annoyed, and I hoped it wasn't because of me, but when our eyes met his soft smile reassured me.

Nori was in the back of the room, hiding in the shadows, looking angry with a deep frown on his face and his arms crossed on his chest. His position reminded me of that he had just before slaughtering the men and it made me shiver.

Oin was the one to break everyone's angry thoughts.

"Oh shush all of you. The lass is fine.

-It's true. 'I said to stop the surging contestations 'Look, I'm fine. They didn't hurt me, just frightened me. I'm perfectly fine. Besides' I said pointing at my cuts 'I did this to myself when I fell and tried to escape."

No one seemed really convinced by my small voice. I cleared my throat a bit before continuing. I turned toward Ori who looked like his puppy had been meanly kicked and said.

"Did you know that thyme and, what was it Oin, wizard hazel?' I glanced at the healer who magically heard me clearly.

-Witch hazel' he provided.

-Right, so thyme and Witch hazel are used in balms to prevent infections. See I'm already learning. I bet I'll soon become one of the best healers around. Just wait and see."

I knew I was rambling and sputtering nonsensically but it did work a bit. The dwarves calmed down and Bofur even sported a small smirk. Still, Ori looked quite upset. I disentangled myself gently from Danà's arms and spread my arms in his direction.

"Oh, come here. I need a cuddle anyway…"

I smiled when he quickly embraced me. I could feel the tension ease away from the room. Then Ori spoke, eliciting laughs from everyone and even a soft chuckle from me.

"You know Amelia, dwarves don't cuddle…"

God, I loved these dwarves, I thought with a big smile on my face.

* * *

><p><strong>AN: Once again I want to thank you for the nice reviews and PM! It's amazing to feel such support for this little monster of a story. Thanks as well for the few people who added this story in their alerts and favorites! **

**So just a few notes about this chapter:**

**First I hope no one was offended/disturbed by mentions of violence and death. I really think the descriptions were light and vague enough. **

**Second, I have no medical knowledge whatsoever. The plants and their abilities cited here were found on two different websites. Obviously I am not encouraging anyone to try and chew on them! The information about honey is true, or at least various researches have demonstrated that it helped. **

**Third... How did you find angry Nori? Was the description to your liking? :) **

**I'll try and update the next chapter tomorrow. If I can't though, I want to let you know I don't know when the next update will be. Sometime next week, but it's highly probable I won't update any chapters on Monday, Tuesday and Wednesday.**


	8. A Nightmare before Midnight

**Everything belongs to Tolkien, except for my OC and the plot**

* * *

><p>I was comfortably sitting in front of the hearth, almost disappearing in between the big cushions and with a warm cup of chamomile in my hands. Ori was back to his usual sweet self after our little cuddle and Dori was hovering over me like a mother hen. He had even decided to bake some small cookies, saying that food was the solution to every trouble.<p>

I didn't want to contradict him. Anyway I was honestly not far from actually wholeheartedly agreeing with his philosophy. Besides, I was hungry.

Dori and Ori had basically clung on my arms during the whole walk back. On one side Ori would hold my elbow slightly, blabbering about little nothings, clearly attempting to make me forget about this whole event. It was sweet and I needed it so I talked lightly back with him. Though if I were entirely honest I didn't talk much and just let his voice lull me into a sense of familiarity and safety.

Dori was holding my other arm, supporting me. His second hand was hovering a few inches away of my back. It felt as if he was afraid I'd break at any moment. His worry and guilt were hurting me slightly but I couldn't do much at that moment except for letting him care for me wordlessly.

What worried me a bit though was Nori's gloomy face. The dwarf was always more silent, more discreet than the two others. But still even I could see that something was wrong. I could only hope he wasn't too angry with me.

During our walk back, he had been several steps behind and kept walking along the wall, noiselessly. I could feel his eyes on me though and every time I glanced above my shoulders I would meet his grey eyes immediately. His face was unreadable.

Now he sat in a chair on the other side of the room. He wasn't moving or saying anything as he stared at the fire burning high in the hearth. I wanted to speak with him, to apologize for this mess and make sure his anger wasn't directed at me. If it was, I would do anything I could to be forgiven. I had to talk to him, but it didn't feel right to do it while Ori was here.

Luckily, Dori called Ori for some help in the kitchen, leaving me alone with Nori. I remained silent for a few minutes before whispering, hoping the others wouldn't hear.

"I'm sorry. I'm truly sorry."

Nori sighed before rubbing his hand on his face tiredly. He left his spot at the opposite side of the room and sat on the floor not too far from me, leaning against the wall near the hearth. He had bent one of his legs and used it to support his left arm.

"You have nothing to feel sorry for' he sighed.

-Well, then what's wrong?" I softly asked.

He frowned some more. It was sort of funny really, to see his braided eyebrows move on his face. He almost looked cute with his grumpy pout.

"We told you already, about dwarves and how they protected the women."

He didn't say more and suddenly I understood. Damn I was slow. I could have slapped myself for my sluggish brain.

"Nori' I started 'You do realize that I'm fine and safe, right?"

He grunted and shrugged. Wow, it was worse than what I had thought.

"Nori' I said in a sing song voice 'Look at me."

I waited a while and seeing he didn't make a move, I decided to stand. I put the cup of chamomile on a small table and kneeled in front of him. I put my hand on either side of his face and forced him to look into my eyes. My fingers were skimming his cheekbones while my palms rested on his beautiful beard. I could see he was surprised by my gesture but I didn't care. I wanted him to understand.

"Oy, you stubborn dwarf. You listen to me. I. Am. Fine." I said as sternly as I could.

He lifted one of his hands to brush gently on my bruised cheek. His touch was too light to make me feel pain, but the care he took to make certain he wouldn't hurt me made my heart fill with warmth.

"You got hurt.' He whispered so low I wouldn't have heard it, hadn't all my attention been turned toward him.

-Really Nori, those men were brutes. They scared me is all. Really scared me I'll admit it. But think about it that way, now at least I'm aware such things could happen." I said in a soft voice.

I was startled by his sudden move as he grabbed my elbow, though he didn't hurt me at all. He then said in a very serious tone, his eyes turning hard, but clearly not intending to glare at me.

"That won't happen again. Amelia, I swear it won't if I can do anything about it."

My heart swelled some more at his words. I was used to silent support from my uncle and aunt, they would softly encourage me, usually wordlessly, with little gestures. No one had, in my memory at least, even been so serious about protecting and helping me. It was a strange thing to witness. I wasn't used to such…fierceness. I felt my cheeks warm a little. I didn't know whether I liked it or whether I should yell at him about feminism and genders equality.

Still, I answered as logically and softly as I could.

"You can't control the world and the people living in it Nori. What happened tonight was just an unfortunate event. Nothing more.

-You could have been hurt. You've been hurt.' He insisted stubbornly, a deep frown on his face.

-Yes, and you could have died trying to rescue me." I replied.

His derisive snort at that made me want to slap some sense in his stubborn head. I couldn't understand how he would be so protective about me and so carefree about his own safety. It annoyed me greatly.

"What' I said 'You think you're almighty? Are you made of stone and steel? No! You could have been hurt too, so stop your nonsense. And for the umpteenth time, I. Am. Fine!"

He sighed and finally nodded, though I could see his mood wasn't really good and he clearly wasn't convinced about my words. Sighing, I wondered what it would take to make these unhappy thoughts leave his mind. Ori had been easy to guess. Dori, well Dori needed quite obviously to take care of me in any way he could in order to reassure himself I was alright.

But what needed Nori to be cheered up? I skimmed through my memories with him. He was a cheeky, if extremely calm and silent person. He had gotten used to send me winks in the most inappropriate moments, and other moments too when I thought about it. He would often smirk, and sometimes chuckle but rarely laughed in earnest.

What could Nori need?

Then a silly idea crossed my mind. It was the only one I had so far.

I decided a little embarrassment on my part wouldn't be too much of a price to pay if it eased his worries a bit, so I decided to give this idea a try.

"Oh, I almost forgot.' I started as he looked at me questioningly 'I am going to ask your brother to braid my hair for me."

I could have laughed as he sputtered something unintelligible before standing up and adding with a wink.

"Well, what can I do, it's the King's orders after all…"

I grabbed my now lukewarm cup of chamomile and went to the kitchen.

Dori's grateful and concerned smile told me he had heard most of my discussion with Nori. Seriously, have dwarves magical ears or something of the sort? From his nod though I gathered I hadn't done anything inappropriate this time.

Sitting on the bench near the table, I looked at Dori's and Ori's antics in the kitchen and we were soon joined by Nori. I couldn't help but smirk at the slight pink tinge adorned on his cheeks.

He sat on the other side, sighing and holding his head with one of his hands. He looked tired. We were all waiting patiently for the cookies to bake when a thought came to the forefront of my mind.

"Maybe I should learn to fight.' I mumbled more to myself than anything.

'What?' 'Why would you do that?' 'No way!' were the three immediate answers I received.

-Well, in case anything like that happens again, I would at least be able to defend myself a bit' I reasoned.

-Nothing of the sort is going to happen.' Nori groaned.

-You can't know that.' I replied softly.

-You can't learn to fight just like that, Amelia. It isn't so easy. It's a lot of constant hard work.' Dori was frowning, displeased with the idea.

-I could do it.' I insisted

-But, you said you wanted to be a healer.' Ori softly added.

-Well, yes. But…

-You should concentrate on that. We will not let further harm comes to you. I promise. This was a mistake we won't make again. Don't you. Don't you feel safe? Here with us. Don't you feel safe at all?" Dori was frowning more than ever.

I understood then that he didn't interpret or see this like I did. For me learning self-defence was logical. Where I came from it was even common for women to learn at least some moves. It was a normal reaction after such events to want to learn to fight back.

But it evidently wasn't the same for them. For Dori, and probably Nori and Ori too, the fact that I wanted to learn such things just meant I didn't trust them. They were supposed to protect me. In their minds they had failed to do so. Asking for that right now probably hadn't been the best idea to have.

"Of course I feel safe when you're all around.' I answered earnestly 'But I just thought it would be a good idea. There is no other meaning behind it, I swear.

-Amelia, we're sorry to have let this happen.' Dori whispered.

-Dori' I sighed. 'I'm fine, really. Everything is fine now. Let's just. Let's forget about it all.' I said forcing a smile to my lips. 'So, when would those cookies be ready? I'm starving and I can't wait to have some!"

None of us discussed the events of that day anymore. We were all clearly attempting to put it behind us. Still, their guilt over something that hadn't been their fault was annoying me. I didn't want them to feel that way.

Little by little, Ori and myself started to talk about various topics that were all as unrelated to what happened as possible. Before long we were chuckling together and had improvised a dinner of sort with various cold meats, cheese, honey and bread.

Life here wasn't so bad, I thought a bit later while munching on some delicious cookies freshly baked.

* * *

><p>The following day I didn't wake before midday and I was a bit ashamed to have slept for so long. Listening intently as I put on my clothes, I realized that the house was way too silent for dwarves to be here.<p>

I stepped noiselessly into the kitchen and grabbed one of the leftover cookies, well, the only leftover cookie actually. Damn these men and their appetites. I suddenly felt that there would be quite a lot of fights in the future when food was concerned.

I went to the living room and found it empty too. Humming to myself I slowly looked around. I had this hunch that if I were to simply leave the house, the three brothers would have a fit, especially if they were to come back to empty rooms. Yet I didn't feel like staying alone here.

I hummed some more, pondering on my options.

What could I do?

From this house I knew how to go to the seamstresses, maybe, and I was quite certain of the way to the healing wards.

Thinking back about the maze of corridors and stairs though, I wasn't too sure of myself. I didn't want to upset or annoy the brothers who had clearly been bothered by my disappearance the previous day.

Left alone to my own devices I had plenty of time to think about way too many depressing topics. I sat forlornly in one of the comfortable chair, facing the empty hearth. I hadn't put any candles in the room and the only light came through one of the openings in the kitchen that was carved in the mountainside.

There was no view, as it wasn't exactly a window but more a sort of long and very narrow tunnel that went horizontally to the outside, allowing both light and fresh air to come in when wooden shutters inside where open. I had one of those in my room and could only guess the brothers had them too.

The dim light in the living room didn't help me escape my gloomy thoughts. My mind turned once more to my family and I was wondering whether I would ever go back there. I was feeling extremely guilty.

Of course I hadn't chosen to come here, but I still enjoyed it, mostly. I was growing to really care about Dori, Nori and Ori who had welcomed me in their home with open arms. They were so attentive about me, all of them.

Dori and his mother hen issues was the most obvious. Ori and his insatiable curiosity and sweet smile seemed to always be ready to provide an attentive ear when I felt like speaking of home. Even Nori in his own silent, borderline gruff way was quite evidently interested in my well being; his overreaction to my failed kidnapping being quite the sign.

I had been genuinely surprised and moved when I had seen all the dwarves coming to my rescue. Their presence in the ward had been another indication of their care. Even Balin, whom I barely knew, had been there and quite concerned.

It was shocking to see that they managed quite easily to make me forget about home. And there lay my problem. From time to time I was starting to forget and it was an awful thing to realize.

The shame and guilt that riddled me were suffocating, yet Nori's wink, Bofur's laugh and Dori's or Ori's smiles managed to wipe those feelings away damn easily. It probably shouldn't surprise me that they would come back with a vengeance when the dwarves weren't there to distract me.

Feeling suddenly cold I brought my knees to my chest. My feet were bare and the hem of the long dress came to brush on my toes, I absentmindedly played with it with one hand while the other circled my legs.

I was deeply thinking when the front door opened, but I only realized it when a hand gently brushed my shoulder. Startled I looked up to see Ori's worried face, with Dori not too far behind. Nori though, was absent.

"Are you alright Amelia?

-I'm fine Ori. I was just…I was thinking of home."

They nodded and Dori went to light a fire while Ori sat in a chair nearby.

"It's perfectly normal to miss you home; you shouldn't feel ashamed of it.' Dori said softly

-That's not the problem.' I whispered

-What do you mean?' The ever curious Ori wondered.

-I feel like I don't miss it enough. When' I tried to say but had to stop to gather my thoughts. 'When I'm with you all I don't miss it much…"

I didn't expect them to understand. If anything I thought they would feel disgusted by my lack of feelings for my home. From what I had gathered in about two weeks with them, it was that the notion of home was really, really important for dwarves. Especially for those dwarves who had been kicked out of it by an angry dragon; all in all that meant almost everybody here as far as I knew.

There was a long silence before Dori asked, or rather ordered, Ori to go prepare some tea. Ori grumbled but did as he was told, I did hear a distinct 'dwarves don't drink tea' in between his grumpy mumbles but chose not to comment. Was Dori considered an oddity for a dwarf? I wondered.

As soon as we were alone together Dori took a deep breath and spoke quite simply.

"There might never be a way for you to go back home Amelia, you know that, right?

-Of course I do.' I answered, pained to hear it stated aloud by someone else than me.

-It is highly possible that you would have to stay here permanently.

-I know Dori!

-Whatever family you had, you'll never see again.' He continued in a calm, even voice.

-I know that…'

-You are alone in this world for no one knows where you come from or how to go back.

-For god's sake Dori I know all that!' I snapped, disbelieving of his sudden blunt cruelty.

-Then don't you know it's perfectly natural and sane even, for you to unconsciously adapt to life here and build new bonds with people? They might not be your family by blood, but they can and will become your kin, if you let them and allow yourself to do so that is.

-I … what?

-Amelia, I cannot say I understand what you're going through. I'm not wise or knowledgeable about such things. But I know that you can't survive here if you don't move on and accept your situation and what it entails."

I pondered on his words. My heart was beating loudly against my ribcage, and it was almost painful. I could feel tears gather in my eyes and I hated myself for being such a cry-baby.

"But…isn't accepting this situation the same as giving up? I haven't even looked for a way back. I didn't have the possibility to say goodbye. I didn't have a choice.' I choked

-Allowing yourself to have a real life here isn't giving up. It's the opposite. Living in our world will, from what I understood and guessed, be really hard for you. You'll have to fight, not with your fists but with yourself, learning new ways and most importantly learning to let the pain go.

-You're telling me to forget about them…

-No, I'm telling you to keep them in your heart but to move on with your life. You might never see them again, yet you might as well one day disappear once more.

-Then wouldn't creating bonds here just hurt me more if I were to disappear?"

We stayed silent for awhile, I was staring at the fire and I guessed he was staring at me. It was Ori, who had silently come back, who broke the silence.

"You said you had no choices.

-Because I haven't.

-Well maybe you had no choice in coming here, but then again now you have a choice to make."

I looked at him with a frown. I didn't understand what he meant by that.

"You have three choices I can think of.' He said before counting on his fingers 'First, you can choose to spend your whole time here looking for a way back to your home, knowing perfectly that you might never find one, you will probably always feel lonely, hurt and guilty. Second, you can stay here and never allow yourself to forget, feeling guilty each time you enjoy yourself and sad each time you don't."

I felt a slight blush creeping on my cheeks. It was somehow how I had felt these past days, even weeks. Ori continued though, not paying attention to my embarrassment.

"And third you can choose to live your life here fully, as if you were here to stay and if the day come you have the possibility to go back, then you'd be able to make a choice based on both your experiences. And if you're cast away, then at least you wouldn't regret anything because you'd have chosen to live. There is no painless option for you though, you'll have to grieve one way or another for one of the two worlds you know and the people in it."

I nodded at him, acknowledging I had listened. It felt slightly odd to hear Ori being so serious and so matter-of-factly. Yet I knew perfectly well that the youngest brother wasn't some child. He was more than 90 years old after all. I shouldn't be surprised if he proved to be wise too.

Ori turned back to a small tray he had set on a table nearby and he handed me a warm cup of tea before handing a second one to Dori. He then went back to the kitchen and came back with another huge tray filled with food. We were going to have lunch here it seemed.

"Thanks. Aren't you drinking with us?' I asked after he came back.

-Dwarves don't drink tea." He muttered.

I smiled when I saw Dori roll his eyes.

"Then what are they supposed to drink?' I smiled.

-Ale of course!"

I startled when I heard Nori's voice. I hadn't seen him come in. He put a small leather bag on the floor and I saw Dori frown while looking at his younger brother. He muttered something that sounded like 'shameful' but I couldn't be sure. Nori had simply shrugged and pointedly avoided to look at his older brother.

Dori was looking at his brother with hard eyes, the like of which I had never seen yet on the old dwarf's face. Nori's eyes were strangely empty of emotion, his features were blank. It oddly disturbed me not to see the usual playful glint in the grey eyes and the small, almost non-existent smirk in the corner of his mouth.

I didn't particularly feel like asking what was happening though and I wanted to keep the discussion as light as possible. Ori seemed to need to be cheered up quite quickly for his face looked sadder at every passing minute.

"Then I'm glad I'm not a dwarf.' I said with a theatrical sigh.

-Why is that?' Ori asked, apparently eager as well to keep the discussion away from Nori and Dori's obvious discord.

-Well I believe I can say that…I hate ale.

-What?' Ori looked at me with wide eyes. 'How can you?

-It's way too bitter. I really can't get used to the taste. Do you think it'll be a terrible affliction around here?' I asked with a frightened expression on my face.

-Most certainly!" he answered with a serious nod.

We managed to stay serious for a few more seconds before we both started to laugh quite loudly. Dori and Nori didn't participate and I could see both of them shaking their heads. They looked at us in a way that clearly said both Ori and I were definitely young and silly.

I didn't care and apparently Ori didn't either.

Our laughs calmed down quickly though and we started to seriously discuss dwarves drinking habits. I still believe they're borderline alcoholics…

We spent the whole afternoon together, laughing, eating and drinking. I had never experienced anything even remotely close to this. I was surprised too that they didn't have anything to do, no jobs to go to, but Dori told me grumpily they could take a day to spend with their ward whenever they wanted.

Balin came by, and stayed for dinner. The older dwarf was annoyed at himself and deeply apologized for having waited too long before braiding my hair. He was a very calm person, very wise in a way. I enjoyed immediately his peaceful presence and we finally got some time to get better acquainted.

He then found out about the details of my arrival here and how I had felt in Bienne. All in all it felt as if I had just met a very old uncle, or even a grandfather. Balin was a good listener, but different than Ori. Balin was paying attention but wouldn't ask questions, simply patting my hand to reassure me and offering his opinion with a warm smile.

I immediately came to trust him.

Anyway, he looked like a short version of Santa and who wouldn't trust Santa?

The evening was quite uneventful, especially after Balin left, but I could easily sense a tension between Dori and Nori and nothing I said, mostly silly jokes, had any effects. I was slightly offended to obtain no reaction from them whatsoever but mostly I was worried because I had no idea what had caused the apparently sudden rift between them.

I stood up and decided to leave them alone a bit. As I was slowly walking in the kitchen toward the corridor, I could only hear a few rushed words spoken angrily.

"What have you done this time? Where did you go?

-Don't ask if you don't want to know the answer.

-Ori, go to bed! Think about the example you set, Nori! Ma would be so ashamed…"

I frowned deeply. I hadn't meant to eavesdrop but their voices travelled quite easily in the silence of the apartment. I wondered what it was that Nori did, but I knew I'd never dare to ask either of the brothers.

* * *

><p>Slightly put out by the three brothers' mood I quickly retired to my room. The previous night I had slept like a log, too exhausted to think about anything. Tonight though was bound to be different.<p>

As I lay in the complete darkness, my thoughts involuntarily went back to the previous day's events. At first I was simply thinking about it in a cold, analytical way. I was just recalling the events in a sort of morbid and clinical fashion.

Little by little the darkness became suffocating and oppressing. My mind started to play tricks on me, letting me hear whispers when there was none. At some point I was almost convinced that the dwarves had made a mistake, that the men were still alive and had come to take me away.

It was all very silly and I knew it. The logical part of my brain was yelling at me that it wasn't possible, that I was perfectly safe here and those men were dead. But another, weirdly stronger part of my mind was whispering about possibilities and what ifs.

What if they weren't dead just hurt?

What if they now wanted to take their revenge?

What if they had friends who had witnessed the events and now wanted to kill the dwarves and me?

And then my mind took a tangent, thinking about what could have happened. And even if I knew it didn't, it still terrified me to think about those possibilities.

What if they had killed me?

What if the dwarves had been too late?

What if the dwarves hadn't bothered to come?

What if the men hadn't been hungry for food first? What if they had…

I shut my eyes, praying for sleep to come and take me. It did take me, but only after probably some hours spent with these nerves wrecking thoughts. At first I fell into a calm and finally peaceful slumber.

But then the nightmares started.

I was reliving all the previous day's events, re-enacting all of it. Yet some parts soon changed and the scary events turned morbid and truly frightening in a way only nightmares can. Gruesome details appeared in front of my eyes as the battle's outcome turned for the worst. Suffice is to say that in my nightmare, the dwarves didn't prevail.

I could see them lying cold on the ground while the men snickered and laughed. I could feel their blood on my face, under my hands.

Nori's grey eyes were wide open and stared back unseeingly into my green, terrified eyes.

And then I felt the men's hands on me as they threw me on the ground next to my friends' corpses.

I swear I could feel their hands.

Contrarily to what had happened in reality I did yell in my dreams. I yelled to the point I broke my voice. I screamed and shrieked, trying to fight them, digging my nails in the bloodied mud in order to crawl away from them, pushing them and their dirty hands away from me.

But I wasn't strong enough.

* * *

><p>I was screaming, tossing and turning in my bed, fighting against the blanket that hindered my move when the three brothers burst into my room. Nori was the first one in and consequently the first one to arrive next to me. He quickly gathered me in his arms and managed to awaken me.<p>

At first I was completely lost and I looked around wildly, trying to catch my breath. I even fought against Nori's hold on me before I realized it was him, not one of the men, who had me in his arms.

I was shaking and freezing. I could feel that my back was damp with cold sweat and my cheeks were probably wet with fallen tears. I was completely entangled in my sheets, which was a clear sign that I had struggled for quite some time in my bed.

Nori's hold was tight and oddly heartening. I let my head fall on his shoulder in a strangely familiar way; weird, it wasn't as if it was usual for him to hold me like this. He was silently rubbing my back, then caressing my hair, then rubbing my back some more. His presence calmed me little by little.

Ori had lighted the small candle on my bedside before disappearing behind Dori, back in the dark corridor.

While it was just the two of us, Nori softly started to hum a tune which surprisingly soothed me quickly. I wasn't clutching at his tunic anymore and my arms had slowly, unconsciously, encircled his waist. I was glad he let me hold him back.

Dori came back with a steaming cup and was followed by Ori who was holding warm looking blankets.

"Here" Dori said in a murmur, putting the cup on the bedside table before taking one of the blankets and covering my shoulders with it.

Nori had to relinquish his hold on me to wrap me in the warm cover. I apparently pulled a face at the sudden absence of his arms for he sat more comfortably on the bed, his back against the wall, and quickly gathered me in his arms, sitting me across his lap.

Dori handed me the cup then, while Ori sat next to us. I was genuinely happy to see the now familiar chamomile and I drank it silently. After I was done, probably around ten minutes later, Dori produced from one of his pocket a small vial.

He sat on the bed next to me and uncorked it. A strong, easily recognizable smell reached my nose.

Lavender.

I closed my eyes, startling a little when I felt Dori's hands on my temples, gently rubbing some lavender essence on my skin. He quickly corked the bottle back and stood up. This little massage had an almost immediate effect; I was feeling much calmer already, but the fear and unease hadn't yet left me.

"She needs calm.' Nori softly whispered.

-Aye. Call if there's something else.' Dori answered just as lowly.

-Aye"

Dori simply nodded and then silently exited the room. I don't know whether he gestured to Ori to follow him or not, but I soon heard the soft click of the door being closed and I was left in Nori's reassuring hold.

I should have been embarrassed I guess, to be behaving and consequently treated like a child by these men. Yet at that moment I only felt grateful for their help. I also had this entirely new feeling of being completely safe and I wondered briefly what was causing it exactly.

I didn't ponder too much on it though.

After awhile I felt like I should talk, explain myself, and Nori's silent presence was warm, strong and protective, letting me feel safe enough to voice my fears.

"I saw them. I heard them in my head." I whispered.

His arms tightened slightly around me and I felt his jaw clench against my right temple.

"I saw the battle and you were all dead…' I kept on explaining and he stayed silent 'I could feel your blood flowing around me and they were laughing. And then…"

I cleared the lump in my throat as fresh tears menaced to fall

"And then they were…' I choked unable to voice such things.

Closing my eyes I pressed my face in the crook of his neck, in his beard while his arms strengthened their hold some more, encircling me and pressing me strongly against his chest.

"They can't harm you anymore.' He whispered in my hair. 'We're all alive and well."

I knew he probably had no idea what to do or how to comfort a scared cry-baby like I was being, but his simple words were strangely enough for me. I wasn't silly enough to believe his whispered words would suddenly make me forget everything, and I fully expected to experience some more nightmares in the future, but for the present time it was enough.

It was more than enough actually for his very presence, when I most needed someone to be here, was something I wouldn't forget about.

The warm blanket provided by Ori and the soothing chamomile of Dori had the expected effects too and I felt most grateful for the three kind brothers.

Soon I felt peaceful and was lulled into a calm state. Feeling entirely safe I started to softly speak with Nori about my home, my world and he mostly listened only asking questions from time to time. I mostly spoke of my uncle and aunt, of the little habits and quirks they had, of how we used to wake up late on Sundays to have a late brunch all together while watching old movies. I had to explain what movies were, of course, but it didn't bother me. Nori seemed genuinely curious about me, even though he didn't display it as enthusiastically as Ori did.

He told me a bit about them too. Explaining in details how cute Ori was when he was a child, how he pouted when he didn't receive enough ink and parchment for his taste, how he would spend his childhood hidden behind books and parchments. He then told me about Dori's protective issues and how he had loudly interrupted Ori's very first training session in combat because he had deemed the instructor to be too violent. Nori had apparently laughed, sitting on the side, with Ori pouting next to him while Dori and the instructor had fought together.

My fears had entirely disappeared by then and I asked a bit more about him. He seemed to hesitate before remembering a story with Bombur, Bofur and himself when they were children. They had tried to sneak in the other two's kitchen in order to try and find where their mother hid the cookies. Bombur's incredible sense of smell, he told me, allowed them to discover the hiding place but not quickly enough for them to avoid getting caught by Bofur's and Bombur's mother.

* * *

><p>At some point I must have fallen asleep for I opened my eyes much later. I was lying on my bed, tucked into the warm blankets. Slowly I sat on the bed awakened by something I couldn't quite place, rubbing my eyes with both my hands.<p>

"You should sleep some more, it isn't dawn yet."

I hadn't realized that Nori was still there. Actually he was just next to the door and I guessed that it was his leaving that had awoken me. Registering the information he just gave me I simply shrugged.

"I'm awake now. There's no point in going back to sleep.' I yawned and I could have bet he smirked 'Unless you're going to tell me that dwarves don't wake up early…" I added as an afterthought.

To my pleased surprise he chuckled softly and shook his head.

"No, actually dwarves' day start early. Dori and Ori are already readying breakfast.

-Great!' I stirred and stood up 'Then let's go."

I was ready to follow him to the kitchen when his eyes went slightly wider and he turned away from me. Clearing his throat he simply added.

"You might want to put some clothes before wandering around."

I looked at what I was wearing. It was a long cotton shirt that reached the middle of my calves and something I would have easily called a grandmother's nightgown. It actually was one of Ori's longest shirts he had lent me while the seamstresses were working on my clothes. He couldn't actually be serious; the thing was ugly and hid everything that could have been perceived indecent to show.

I rolled my eyes and sighed

"You can't be serious. Don't tell me you call that stuff inappropriate. Besides, you saw me like this already."

He glanced at me, one eyebrow raised to his hairline.

"It is entirely different. I didn't plan on seeing you like this. Are you telling me it is perfectly normal where you come from to parade in front of males in your underwear? If so, you come from a very welcoming world…"

Well, when he put it like this…

"I'll change and come soon.

-I thought so too."

I could see his self-satisfied smirk, his previous embarrassment at seeing me like this completely forgotten and I felt the urge to tease him some. Well I couldn't exactly let him win each time now, could I?

Thus I used the fact that he was quite obviously savouring his little victory and taking his sweet time to leave against him.

"Well" I said crossing my arms on my chest and sending him a questioning glance.

He looked at me, curious, and clearly waited for me to continue. I smirked slowly before continuing.

"Is it customary for dwarves to wait in the room when a lady changes? If so I hope you'll enjoy the show."

I couldn't have hoped for a better reaction. His cheeks quickly coloured, taking a vivid red tinge, and he almost ran away from my room. I laughed at his antics while I changed, still wearing one of the 'human' dresses bought by Dori. I couldn't believe how easy it was to make him blush.

Apparently the simple fact that a 'lady' would talk about certain things, even vaguely, would be entirely inappropriate and would embarrass them. I didn't know if it was only the three brothers or the dwarves in general.

Truthfully, these kinds of light teasing were entirely new to me. I wasn't used to joke around and speak lightly about such topics. In that aspect, I had always been more discreet and shy, like the dwarves appeared to be when a lady was in the room. Still I couldn't lie, I had enjoyed the feeling that had come from our little banter.

Life here was going to be fun.

Glancing around in my room I took the now empty cup that Dori had brought the previous day. Remembering the events of the night put a damper on my mood. I had never been one to experience many nightmares, even as a child, and I could honestly said I didn't know what to expect for the nights to come.

I was fairly sure that it wasn't over, simply thinking back about Deathgrip and his other nameless friends made me shudder in horror and I was quite certain that each night would bring back creepy memories that would play tricks on my mind.

I shook my head, as if to clear those thoughts away, and then opened the door.

After just one step I heard the easily recognizable laugh that belonged to the one and only Bofur. I smiled, walking to the kitchen, silently thanking Nori for his fashion advices.

Yet I would never tell him that aloud.

* * *

><p><strong>AN: Thanks to the reviewers and every kind person who read and follow this story. It means a lot to know my 'work' is appreciated! **

**I hope you enjoyed this chapter. I wanted to portray Ori in a more adult perspective, I hope I managed to do so properly.**

**And we see yet another side of Nori :) I hope it wasn't too cheesy...**

**I don't know when I'll be able to update next. Sometime during the week, no later than next weekend.**


	9. The Healer's Apprentice

**I do not own anything except for my OC and the plot.**

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><p>Breakfast had been a cheerful moment and what remnants of nightmare still lingered in my mind quickly disappeared.<p>

After coming in the room I had been warmly welcomed by the smiling faces of Bofur, and surprisingly Bombur and Bifur. Dori quickly came to hover around me but I reassured him with a smile.

The nightmare had shaken me but I was truly fine that morning. I thanked both him and Ori with a short hug, which resulted in Ori's face to become bright red and Bofur to have a laugh fit at the sight. Sometimes I truly wondered when, if ever, that dwarf didn't laugh.

After greeting Bofur, Bifur and Bombur, I winked at Nori and remembering his words about my previous attire, I just couldn't resist adding.

"Fancy seeing you here.' I told Bofur 'I have always liked to have friends visiting without notice; you should come more often, in my world we're so welcoming to everyone…"

Nori choked on whatever it was, he had been drinking and Dori sent me a questioning glance, as did the others. I pulled on my best innocent face and sat next to Ori while Bofur was mocking Nori's apparent inability to drink properly. Bombur laughed heartily and seeing his joyous round face made me incredibly joyous too.

"You know, where I come from, older people sometimes need help to drink and eat. Maybe I should change my profession, you're all so old, you're bound to need me." I told in Bofur's direction.

His reaction didn't disappoint me for he laughed heartily while Nori sent me a glare, which disappeared quickly as he playfully winked at me. I smiled at him. I was happy I had guessed right; Nori enjoyed teasing.

The breakfast soon transformed into a weird food fight after Bofur sent a playful jab at Nori who answered by throwing a piece of cake right on Bofur's nose. I thought Dori would say something, but he simply kept on eating while Bofur, Bombur and Nori fought. Ori tried to join in the battle but Dori immediately ordered him to 'sit down and eat'.

Had I truly once believed that cleaning after these men wouldn't be too difficult?

I looked at a piece of honeyed bread that was stuck on the ceiling with wide eyes. How would I reach it?

After they calmed down, they heartily devoured what was left of food. I was once again impressed by the sheer quantity of food these men were able to eat in a short time span.

Dwarves truly never ceased to amaze me.

And let's just say that their table manners didn't amaze me in a good way.

I chose not to despair on that piece of bread stuck on the ceiling; it would come down at some point, right? Concentrating on more pressing matters, I chose to ask Dori whether it would be alright for me to go meet with Oin that morning. I really didn't want to spend a whole day alone here and I was genuinely curious about what medical knowledge they had in this place. From what I could gather it relied mostly on medicinal plants, thus indicating it might be a rather primitive kind of knowledge. Still, I had to admit that their ointments had been efficient on my wounds and bruises.

"Well, before I show you the way there, we'll need to stop by Balin's' Dori answered before adding 'We need to finalize our accord after all."

He didn't need to say more for I clearly remembered the King's words.

I was to receive my first dwarvish braid.

In all honesty I was curious about that too. They made it sound as if it was a major event so I was wondering whether there'd be some special decorum. Truly that would be awkward. Having two older men, or dwarves, braiding my hair already sounded strange enough and I really hoped it wouldn't entail speeches or any weird traditions.

The very thought of them braiding my hair brought pictures of girly pyjamas-parties and I had to shake my head to free it of such ideas. It wouldn't do to burst in laughter when they'd braid my hair.

I gingerly followed after Dori in a maze of corridors until we stopped at a small wooden door that was slightly decorated with carvings. Dori was the one to knock and we didn't have to wait long before Balin, with his prettily kept white beard and his warm smile, opened the door.

"Oh, here you are!' he said as a welcome before gesturing us in.

-Aye. Did you manage to find some?

-Yes, yes. There were quite a lot of them so it wasn't too difficult.

-Did they found a vein?' Dori sounded hopeful

-Sadly not. Just a few crystals, but enough to make beads and even a few items we'll sell at the market."

I really tried to follow their discussion, but I seriously didn't understand what it was they were talking about. I discreetly looked around to find a room really similar to the three brothers' living room. I was slightly curious about the general lack of decoration and hoped I'll remember to ask Ori about it.

From what I had seen the halls were beautifully decorated, but the inside of the corridors were quite bare, as were Dori's house and now Balin's. The corridors actually looked raw sometimes, as if the natural tunnels had been left in their natural states. Yet that didn't mean the rooms weren't comfortable, as I had previously noted, the abundance of cushions and plush carpets made it especially cosy.

Here too there was a large hearth though no fire burnt at the time and there were various chairs and wooden equipments such as cabinets and wardrobes.

I absentmindedly followed Balin and Dori to the kitchen but as they went through a back door, still talking, I stopped dead in my track. I found myself in front of a very intimidating bald man that was staring at me in a very intense and scary way.

Being here, he was quite obviously a dwarf, but he was taller than those I had met, except maybe for the King. I looked at his numerous tattoos and well kept moustache as he sat at the table and ate his breakfast.

When he glanced at me I swear I felt myself shrunk on the spot. This dwarf seemed to be as stern as the King had been and I felt like a lost child. It was quite impressive to observe that by their mere presence some of the dwarves made me feel decades younger. I didn't appreciate the feeling.

His eyes narrowed at me before he said in a grave voice, adding a nod at the end.

"Dwalin, at your service.

-Amelia, at…yours." I answered like an automat.

He grunted and went back to his food without much ceremony and we kept silent.

I kept glancing at him and soon realized he was observing me too while eating a huge amount of food. Did this dwarf ever smile? It didn't feel like he would. I was starting to feel fidgety but was trying hard not to move at all.

I was grateful when Dori and Balin remembered my presence and came back toward me. I had felt very foolish standing up like this while Dwalin ate but I couldn't muster enough courage to talk to him.

"Here my dear, come and sit.' Balin told me while taking me by the elbow and guiding me to the bench in front of Dwalin.

-Hem, shall I do something special?' I asked Dori to try and avoid Dwalin's watchful gaze

-No, you really have nothing to do." The dwarf simply answered.

I wanted him to elaborate but he quite evidently didn't catch on that. To my surprise, Dwalin's voice resonated in the room while Balin and Dori were muttering about one thing or another together.

"They're discussing about what braid to give you." He said gruffly.

I glanced at him and felt finally brave enough to ask.

"So what's going to happen?

-They didn't explain?' Came his abrupt answer while he drank from a large tankard

-Nope."

I received another grunt from the bald dwarf. He let his tankard clack loudly on the table and looked at me silently for a second. Inside I was imagining myself running away screaming loudly. I stayed immobile and silent though, meeting his eyes without a single blink. I was quite proud of my newfound acting skills.

"They're just going to take a few strands of hair from behind your ear and braid it. They'll use three beads; two made of amethyst to represent your two guardians, and a smaller one made of blue stone to represent your welcomed status within Thorin's Halls."

I nodded, suddenly forgetting about Dwalin being scary when my natural curiosity became stronger than my uneasiness.

"Is there a particular reason for the amethyst? I guess the blue stone is used because it's the colour of the mountain's rock. But what about the amethyst?

-Amethyst is the stone we use to express protection.

-Protection?' I didn't really understand what he meant.

-Aye. By braiding it into your hair, Balin and Dori put you under their direct protection and accept their status as guardians."

I nodded but didn't have the time to ask more question as Balin and Dori finally came back. At the same time Dwalin stood up and left without a word. I really couldn't tell what he thought of me, I couldn't even be sure he actually thought anything of me. For all I knew I might simply be too insignificant for him to care, but I had a hunch it wasn't the case. He did take some time to explain a few things to me after all.

"So, you don't need to do anything. Just sit and wait, it won't take long." Balin said while selecting and dividing some of my hair from behind my left ear into three equal strands.

He braided them a little before threading a small amethyst bead onto the middle strand. He then stood up, letting Dori take his place and continue with the braiding. Once more, after a few centimetres, Dori threaded the bead onto the middle strand. Then he finished to braid my hair and attached the end of it with a thin leather string on which a blue stone had been stringed.

"Luckily I have long hair." I said with a smile.

I couldn't resist touching my new hairdo. The blue and purple of the stone and amethyst were quite beautiful on my brownish hair, or at least I liked how it looked. My long hair was light brown overall, but with darker and lighter streaks here and there which gave a weird rather undefined colour for it changed and varied depending of the sun and light between really dark blonde and brown.

I always had envied people with jet black hairs. There wasn't any real reason and my aunt used to say that no woman was ever entirely happy about her hair. But that day, for the first time in awhile, maybe ever, I really found my hair to be pretty with the three stones threaded in it.

I simply felt happy.

I offered both Dori and Balin an enormous and cheerful smile and they kindly smiled back.

"Thank you, both of you." I said, earning a simple 'Don't mention it' from Balin and 'Stop thanking me all the time' from Dori which made me chuckle.

"Shall I show you to the healing ward?" Dori asked me then and I nodded energetically for I was quite eager and impatient to go there.

* * *

><p>One hour or so later I was standing in front of Oin, waiting for him to state what an apprenticeship actually entailed here.<p>

The old looking dwarf seemed quite nice but appeared to be almost completely deaf. That could become slightly annoying I mused as I had to repeat for the fourth time that I would like to train here. Not to paint, not feeling faint, and no it didn't rain. I wanted to train. I didn't even understand how he could mishear me quite so badly. The weirdest part being that, when he finally heard, he simply stated that he already knew that.

I had the feeling being his apprentice would be both exhausting and fun.

Soon though, Oin showed me around the ward. He pointed at the tools and where they were placed and explained once more that all the water I'll found in copper vases would have already been boiled. We moved between three different rooms, two of which had beds aligned along one wall. He then showed me the cabinets containing already made balm, ointments and medicines before guiding me toward a last room in the back where I found impressive quantities of varied unprepared plants.

I realized before long that a large part of what I had learnt already wouldn't be useful here, at all. What was the point in knowing about molecules, ECGs, and so many other things that were directly linked with technology? Here there was no possibility to do a simple blood analysis, no way to perform X-rays. They didn't even have aspirin.

Yet I couldn't find it in me to be truly disappointed or annoyed. If anything it felt incredibly thrilling to have so many new things to learn. I'll have to relearn all the gestures to do to check on someone's health, how illnesses were treated, everything. Somehow with the prospect of having to relearn everything from scratch, my early passion was renewed and I felt impossibly motivated.

In my mind, I had the impression I had been offered a real second chance. Here I could start my life anew. Really and completely.

My enthusiasm obviously pleased Oin but he calmed me wisely, saying I should first learn to recognize the plants and their aspects, both normal and dried. The program was quite simple and logical really, I would have to first be taught to recognize the plants, and then associate each plant with its effects. After awhile I would move on to the preparation of balm and ointments.

All the while, Oin said, I would assist him with the few patients we'd have.

I quickly found out that dwarves were hardly sick and had impressive healing capacities. It explained why so few dwarves would choose to learn about healing; they simply didn't need it. Yet we had patients every day; even though they were rarely ill, dwarves were short tempered and had a hard life. We treated mostly bruises, cuts and other similar injuries, resulting from fights, training or work.

At the same time I found out that Oin was actually one of the only two dwarves in the Halls who had an extensive knowledge of plants and healing process. All of them apparently knew the basics, just like everyone back home knew what to take for curing a simple headache. So there was only one other dwarf who had a real understanding of the more complicated healing processes. And now here I was.

From that first day onwards I spent all my days at the healing ward with Oin.

I would wake up early in the morning, usually thanks to Dori or Ori who would come and knock at my door. Then I would have breakfast with whichever of the brothers was there at the time and then I'd walk to the ward and spend almost my whole day there, having lunch with Oin, and sometimes Danà who'd come to visit me.

The second healer hadn't come in at all since I had been there and Oin had simply vaguely told me she only came when she was needed and that she usually worked elsewhere. It did make sense, most of the time Oin didn't have many patients so we had a lot of time to simply concentrate on my training.

From time to time I'll remember my discussion with the three brothers about weapon training. Seeing all those black and blue dwarves wasn't really motivating and to be honest I didn't need to learn how to fight when all I did was staying in the Halls. Besides, my days were busy and the little free time I had, I didn't want to spend it receiving bruises.

In the late afternoon I'd usually go back to the brothers' house, often stopping at the market first to buy food; that is meat in huge quantities. I often was the first back home and once there I would honour my part of the contract and clean the house and start preparing diner. And that brought quite a lot of troubles to the dwarves.

* * *

><p>One afternoon, I remember particularly well, I had been happy to find some black pudding in between two pieces of hams. I couldn't resist buying it, I wanted to try and reproduce my aunt's recipe. Going to the vegetables stands I was greeted warmly by the dwarf lady who had gotten used to see me around.<p>

That evening, Bofur and Bombur came by and I was glad I had prepared enough of my dish to feed an entire regiment…or five dwarves and a tiny human. They were all waiting as noiselessly as dwarves could be and I served my dish proudly.

"Black pudding! It's been awhile since we had some!' Ori happily exclaimed before paling slightly and taking a closer look at his plate.

-What's…this?" Bofur asked, glancing at Dori and Nori.

Dori and Nori exchanged a look that clearly said "she did it again…" Seeing as the dwarves were suddenly silent I looked at them, once more slightly disappointed in their lack of enthusiasm in regards of my cooking.

"It's just black pudding and apple.' I sighed while sitting next to Nori.

-Apples?' Bombur at least seemed curious.

-Why…why would you do that?" Ori stammered forlornly.

I looked at Nori who seemed to see how disappointed I was. In reaction he quickly tasted my dish and said quickly.

"It's delicious…really nice. Awesome cooking Amelia. Wonderful, really."

I smiled at him. Nori always seemed ready to be nice and sweet with me. I wouldn't lie, I was grateful, even though I knew it was all lies.

Quickly Dori, and Bofur followed suit and complimented my dish, though they clearly didn't appreciate it nearly as much as what they said. Bombur was the only one who really seemed to enjoy it actually and it apparently scared his brother.

"Ori, try it. It's good. It's different, but good.

-It's apple…with black pudding…"

I sighed. Obviously, for Ori's sake, I'll have to try and tune down my habit to mix tastes and to cook vegetables and fruits.

Nori discreetly patted my shoulder and I turned to face him. His face showed he felt sorry and concerned at my reaction. I smiled at him, letting him know I wouldn't let such a thing bring me down for long.

After that event I did try to avoid cooking as much vegetables, but I just couldn't forgo them completely. In the end, we all made compromises and more often than once, I prepared vegetables for me and exclusively meat for them. I was extremely pleased though, each time Nori would insist to try my veggie dishes. It was obviously costing him, and each time I would thank him with warm smiles. When I said he was nice, I didn't lie.

Even Dori tried to eat some vegetables from time to time.

* * *

><p>All in all my days were full and I came to really appreciate the time in the evenings, when we'll just sit in the living room. Nori and Dori would light their pipes and smoke, while Ori and I would discuss about one topic or another. More often than not other dwarves came to visit us, especially Bofur, Bifur and Bombur and the evenings were always spent in laughter with them.<p>

Bofur, I discovered, was a great musician, as were almost all of them really. Their merry songs would lull me to peaceful slumbers as I'd witness them dancing and laughing around the living room, that is, when I didn't join in the merriment.

The only thing I would have done gladly without were the nightmares that still plagued me. Even though they had slowly started to ease away, I couldn't count the number of times I had awoken in Nori's or Dori's arms. Yet it didn't bring my mood down.

Each time I would awaken because of my fears, the three brothers would sooth me and Nori would spend hours with me, listening to my blabber about what was once my home. Sometimes, we wouldn't even speak and he'd just hold me close to him. Little by little, I realized some time later, those talks helped me to accept the loss of my previous family.

I can honestly say that the three brothers helped me in more ways than one. Their simple presence was a rock I could hold onto.

* * *

><p>"Nori?" I asked once when we were alone together after one of my nightmares had occurred.<p>

He hummed, simply to let me know he was listening, and I felt his chest rumble against my shoulder and back.

"Thank you…for being there."

He remained silent but I felt his arms tightened slightly around my waist. He hummed once more and we didn't exchange anymore words that night. He silently let his head rest on top of mine. My cheek was resting against his shoulder, my nose buried in his beard that had such a comforting smell for me. It had become a familiar mix of tobacco and leather with something else I couldn't identify but that altogether made Nori's scent.

We never spoke of those moments. It was as if what occurred in the darkness of the night was ours only. Or at least I liked to think so.

* * *

><p>Soon a whole month had passed without me realizing it.<p>

In that time I had adapted fairly well and was now looking as much like a dwarf as I could. Considering I had no beard and had slightly thiner bones it was quite a feat to manage that level of similitude already. I was now wearing dwarvish dresses that were warm and fitting; Danà had told me dwarves women were used to those form fitting clothes.

"You should be proud of the forms Mahal gave you" she had emphasized making me blush.

The seamstresses had delivered the breeches and long tunics I had asked for and even Dori had to admit it was entirely appropriate, if unusual, to wear them. He did ask me to wait a bit before wearing them in the halls though. I quickly got to love them, they were comfortable, warm, and form fitting but the long tunic would hide what the dwarves would deem inappropriate to see.

Yet, I wore mostly the dresses, I didn't want to stand out too much, especially now that I was officially Oin's apprentice and I respected Dori's opinion.

* * *

><p>So here I was. A month after my arrival in the Halls, wearing a nice blue dress and white apron I always wore in the wards.<p>

"So, which one is it?' Oin was holding a bunch of dried flowers in front of me.

-Hem…fewfever?

-It's Feverfew and no, this isn't it.

-Equin…something…a ?"

Oin sighed deeply, clearing wondering why I just couldn't get it. Still those were dried plants. Dried, as in all brown coloured and shrivelled to an unrecognizable size. I could see Oin was slightly disappointed when he shook his head desperately.

"Think before you talk. You should know about that. There's something clearly lacking on this plant that makes it impossible to be feverfew or Echinacea.

-Ah…Echinacea that's what I… Right. Concentrate. Focus."

I'm ashamed to admit it did take me quite some time before blurting out.

"There's no flower! There's no flower!

-Good. But that doesn't tell you what plant it is and how to use it."

Killjoy.

"Maybe,' I hesitated, 'maybe I could try and write down what you teach me? It'd be easier to remember like that.

-You know how to write?' he seemed genuinely surprised.

-Of course." I scoffed.

And starting that day I meticulously started to write down in a little notebook all the information Oin gave me. I even asked him if I could sew in the thick parchment some pieces of the dried plants, to help me recognize them.

The master healer was happy to see me so serious about my studies, that much was obvious.

Ori was extremely pleased when I first asked him to give me one of his blank notebooks and I remember clearly how Dori and Nori had exchanged a worried glance.

"Amelia, do you plan on writing everything on this book?' Dori asked sweetly.

-Well, yes. I'm used to write things down to help remember them. It's too hard just trying to recall discussions.

-You'll need quills and we'll have to buy more ink too.' Ori seemed enthusiast. 'I'm sure you'll need more notebooks too.

-Yes, probably." I smiled at him.

I was with Ori while he was writing down a list of items we'll need when I heard Nori mutter in a slightly scared and resigned way.

"We got two of them now."

* * *

><p>It took me around another month to be able to recognize with undeniable certitude all the dried plants we had in our usual stocks. All things considered, we didn't have that many in the stock and I hadn't really memorized or seen the other medicinal plants that could be used. To say I was surprised about the sheer diversity of useful plants would put it mildly. Of course I had known that some plants had medicinal properties and that they were used centuries ago in my own world. But still there's a difference between knowing about it and witnessing it. Besides there was no course in med school, that covered how to recognize dried sage from goatweed.<p>

The notebooks had been immensely useful and I now had several of them, full of information and dried plants. I would often reread them and Ori would from time to time ask me questions about the plants, helping me greatly to memorize all that knowledge.

That particular morning had been spent with me finally learning how to prepare my very first ointment. Well I had been observing and assisting Oin mostly. I was quite proud of my achievements so far and Oin was even prouder, saying I was the quickest apprentice he'd seen. I'm sure he was saying it only to be nice and when I had told so to Dori, Nori and Ori they had simply told me that to become a healer, it usually took twenty years of apprenticeship.

Twenty years. Right.

Not going to happen.

The simple thought of spending twenty years without approaching a patient and simply grabbing tools for Oin was not really in accordance with my personal projects.

Still, Oin affirmed I was quick in my learning, even though the first stage had taken me quite some time to achieve and we still had many things to cover. I would admit we had actually barely scratched the surface of what I should learn about plants.

That day though, Oin had been happy to see I had no problem measuring proportions and I was quick in catching how to do an ointment. What should I say, between home cooking, chemistry and such stuff, it really didn't seem that complicated to measure quantities of plants and mix them together. Seeing my progress were faster than he had expected, Oin had told me I could go home earlier that afternoon, besides there wasn't much to do in the ward.

I was about to leave when the most awkward and strange thing happened. It started with a low, deep and faraway rumble that seemed to echo in the corridors and Halls. Then there was a sort of tremor that ran in the stone. I felt it in my very bones and could hear some of our copper tools clinking against each other slightly.

It was the first time I experienced such a thing and I turned toward Oin questioningly.

I felt dread start to pool in my stomach when I saw the expression on his face.

For the first time since I had known him, Oin was very pale, as if all blood had left his face, and I could see fear in his eyes. Before I could even react he jumped toward me, grabbed my arm, and yanked me toward the far wall, the one that was against the mountain side.

"Oin what is it?" I asked, scared by his behaviour.

He didn't answer and seemed to wait for something. At that time only, I realized there was an eerie, unnatural silence in the whole Halls. For the first time ever I couldn't hear the booming voices echoing from who knows where, there wasn't any faraway clanking sound or any sound really.

Just complete silence.

And then I heard the chaos.

Yells and shouts echoed and came to my ears, distorted by their journeys through the corridors.

"What is it? What happened?' I asked once more.

-A part of the halls, probably in the mine, just collapsed." Oin answered before rushing around in the ward.

I remained unmoving for maybe ten seconds before rushing alongside him, preparing bowls of water and clean linens and threads for bandages and sewing the wounds. I didn't even think about questioning his certitudes about the collapsing of a part of the mines.

"What shall I prepare?' I asked and thank god he heard me clearly.

-We'll need honey. Start preparing infusions of yarrow too. It'll help slow the bleeding. I'll prepare the salves and ointments we'll need.

-I come from the kitchen, they'll bring the pots of honey they have immediately."

This new voice startled me and I took a second to glance at the person who had just entered the ward. I guessed it was the second healer who came only when needed. From the fine black beard with just a few streak of grey and the curves in the body that were prettily enhanced with a grey dress, I guessed she was a woman.

I know…I could mostly guess correctly thanks to the dress.

I didn't take much time to ponder on this though as I was busy preparing herbs for infusion.

"Oin, should I add Echinacea or lavender or something?"

The woman answered me instead of the dwarf who was currently busy with his hands full of pots and jars of all sizes.

"Use the Echinacea but add chamomile instead of lavender. The soothing effect would be more important.

-Alright, hem…"

In my rush I suddenly wasn't sure which plant was Echinacea. I should have been able to recognize it though because Oin had particularly insisted on me knowing this one on sight. Behind me the woman was observing me with keen eyes, I could feel her stares burning a hole in the back of my head. I took a deep breath to calm my anxiety and finally be able to focus.

Thank god it worked.

My mind was clearer and I had no trouble grasping the proper amount of Echinacea that would once ingested help the patient to strengthen his immune system. I went to prepare the infusions and only saw her nod approvingly from the corner of my eyes. Apparently I had just passed some test I hadn't known was occurring.

I was still preparing the infusions when the first echoes of rushed steps came to my ears. Soon enough four dwarves came in holding a stretcher. A bloodied body lay on it, unmoving and silent. They managed to quickly put the dwarf on one of the beds and went back running. They had left the room for a second when a second group came in, then a third, a fourth.

In less than fifteen minutes, we ended up with a dozen of patients, all hurt to various degrees. To allow Oin and the woman time to concentrate on the most serious cases, I had instinctively started a triage of sort at the entrance as soon as the fourth injured dwarf had come in.

Then I quickly took care of those who had minor scratches and cuts. The dwarves coming with the stretcher had apparently quickly caught on what I had asked them for they continued to dispatch the wounded according to their apparent injury's status.

After a while some women came in and Oin ordered me to let them take care of the bandages, asking me to instead sew the wounds and help with the gravely injured.

Time flew without me noticing. My thoughts were entirely focused on the wounds I cleaned, disinfected and sew back before applying honey ointment and bandages on them. I had no memories of ever having to face such an intense situation before.

At some point though I ended up with no dwarf to help and I felt slightly lost. Looking around I could see Oin shaking his head in front of one unconscious dwarf and I automatically went to join him.

"What is it?

-He's bleeding inside I think' He said pointing at the rapidly darkening skin on the dwarf's stomach 'There's nothing I can do for him."

I looked at Oin, stunned. Did he mean he wouldn't do anything?

"Oin, we can open and see if it's possible to shut the wound. It might not be enough but…

-Opening him? How would that be useful?' The healer sounded almost horrified.

-Please, let me try. I know it could work. I'll just need a clean, sharp blade and lots of linen to absorb the blood, threads and the smallest needles we have. I'll need something to keep his abdomen open too.

-Are you…are you certain it could help him?' He clearly was doubtful.

-It's often done in my world." I simply answered.

Oin seemed to hesitate but seeing as this dwarf was the last one requiring immediate treatment and as there was nothing Oin thought he could do, he allowed me to try my 'barbaric method'. As a healer he really couldn't refuse to do everything that could possibly be tried.

"He has to remain unconscious and completely still.' I told Oin who nodded.

-I still have some poppy juice left." Oin simply said before rushing to grab a very small vial.

He had told me already that poppy juice was extremely sparse and had to be bought from southern states. We didn't have much and to think he'd give some to a patient he thought would die, just showed me how much confidence he had in me. It made me nervous.

I looked at him forcing some of the juice in the dwarf's mouth.

My anxiety suddenly rose.

Soon I found myself with a blade in shaky hands. That wouldn't do. I needed to be focused and precise in all my movements. I closed my eyes and took a deep breath. I tried to replay in my mind diagrams, schemas, pictures and video samples I had studied about internal wounds' treatments. They were all blurry in my memories. Fear, uncertainty, anxiety were rushing through me and I had to shut them down. This dwarf needed all my attention, he needed me to be strong and focused.

The diagrams and other schemas steadily became neat. Slowly the various procedures and their steps unrolled themselves in my mind.

I could do it.

When I opened my eyes next, sounds around faded into nothingness and my hands were steady again, my grip on the blade firm and I knew my every move would be precise. Narrowing my eyes I started to literally butcher the poor unknowing dwarf.

I have no idea how much time passed or how many dwarves came and went around me. I think I remember barking for more light at some point as well as more linen bandages. I had found the bleeding originated from his liver and had sewn as best as I could the wound in his organ.

The weird object Oin had given me to keep the wound I had made open was quickly removed and I stitched the unconscious dwarf back. Once it was all done I used the last drops of adrenaline in my blood to tell Oin he needed to be given something to help replenish blood and help his blood coagulate properly.

I stood idly silent next to the bed. My hands and forearms were red from blood, as was my chest. I probably looked like a mad butcher at this moment. The injured dwarf though was still breathing and I had hopes my little stunt would work. After all dwarves were a tough lot.

I managed to stand for a few minutes, unable to move, with my arms falling limply at my sides. And then I suddenly realized what I had just done. For the first time in my life I had operated someone, unsupervised and without any proper monitoring of the patient's conditions. I even did it in an unsterilized environment with doubtfully clean tools.

Oh dear lord.

I was most certainly the most foolish and stupidly stubborn person ever. My mind was whirling with lists of complications that could happen and I cursed myself for taking such risks with someone's life.

I wasn't authorized to perform such things in my world. What folly had made me believe I could do it here?

Black spots started to cloud my vision as I hyperventilated. I turned around to look at the mess in the wards. Injured dwarves were still lying on the floor because we didn't have enough beds; there were bloodied bandages, pieces of rocks, woods and other materials we had removed from the wounds. Overall it was chaos around me and it wasn't the moment to feel faint.

The woman healer came to me in quick strides and guided me toward the only empty corner in the room. Forcing me to sit down she then brought some clean water and linen to help me wash the blood from my arms and hands.

"Did some of them die?' I had no idea why I asked that question, my stupidity knew no limits.

She looked me in the eyes, she had clear, icy blue eyes that reminded me of someone else but that I couldn't quite place.

"Yes. We lost three good dwarves when the ceiling of one of the minor mining tunnels collapsed. We couldn't retrieve them. In the wards, we lost two."

Five. Five men had died in the last hours. That reminded me of my inaptitude at keeping tabs of the time.

"How long…I mean what time is it now? It was just the afternoon when…

-It's well past midnight. Dawn will be upon us soon enough."

My eyes widened at that. I couldn't believe I'd spent so much time in here. I looked up and counted the bodies I could see. The woman seemed to guess what I was doing and answered my unasked question.

"There are eight of them in the wards. Seven more are lying in the second room nearby where we put some makeshift beds. Ten were sent back to their homes with minor injuries."

I did the math quickly. Twenty-five people had been injured, five had died. That wasn't such a good result in my book. I wished we could have done more.

"There was nothing else to do and yes, you're as easy to read as a book right now so don't quirk that eyebrow at me. We did well today. Mines accidents happen, it's sadly a part of dwarves' lives."

I nodded, still saddened and wondering if I could have done something more, something different. Thank god I hadn't witnessed any death myself. My gaze fell on the dwarf I had operated and an awful voice whispered in my head. _I hadn't witnessed it…yet._

Hands cleaner I rubbed my forehead, exhaling an exhausted sigh. There was still a lot to do. First it was of utmost importance to clean the ward. Then we had to monitor the wounded and the absence of monitoring tools put an impressive damper on my already forlorn mood.

"We'll have to keep close attention to the wounded but for now there's nothing you can do without some sleep. Go back home."

The woman said before I shook my head no.

"I'll help clean the ward, and then I'll go take some sleep. We could as well put a makeshift bed for one of us around. It'd be better to be close in case of emergency."

She seemed to seriously ponder my ideas, which I was grateful for. She then gave a strict nod before telling me.

"We don't need your help, I asked a few dwarves to come and clean the room. Don't worry about it and just go back home to have a full sleep.' I went to protest but she stopped me and continued 'After you come back in six or seven hours minimum, we'll think some more about your other idea and we'll see with Oin whether we put it into practice or not."

I sighed. Honestly I was really exhausted and the prospect of falling asleep right here and there was already really tempting. I couldn't say no to my own comfy bed that was waiting for me welcomingly.

I stoop up, helped by the woman's strong hands and as I was leaving she gave me a light tap in the back.

"You did well."

I took a few steps before turning at the door to face her again.

"I don't even know your name.' I said simply.

-I'm Dís.

-Amelia.' I simply added.

-I know."

I nodded and left. Our greetings had been different than any I had had with dwarves before, clearly direct and to the point and without any added politeness. Well we just had spent hours close to each others with others' blood flowing between our fingers.

Who cared about decorum and politeness after that?

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><p><strong>AN: Thank you everyone for the reviews! It helped me a lot and cheered me when I most needed it earlier this week :) Thanks too to all the new followers and favorites! **

**So this chapter is kinda huge and I hope you enjoyed it.**

**I know that the last part with the operation might appear entirely too far-fetched but I honestly believe it's still possible and not too unrealistic. If you disagree, please let me know though.**

**Thanks again for everyone's support! It's really appreciated :)**

**I'll update the next chapter sometime tomorrow. **


	10. Thorin's Labyrinth

**Everything still belongs to JRR Tolkien...except for my OC and the plot**

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><p>I had the strange feeling that it took me hours to go back to the three brothers' home after leaving the healing wards. All in all it probably didn't take me more than ten, maybe fifteen minutes, but it felt excruciatingly long and slow.<p>

By the time I arrived in front of the door, my eyes were closing without my accord and I felt too tired to even lift my hand to turn the doorknob. I let my head fall against the wood with a thud, closing my eyes for just a second. Just a second was needed to catch my breath and gather my thoughts.

As I took a deep breath though, the world suddenly tilted and I fell forward. I sadly thought I would soon meet the floor in a close embrace but only fell on a hard, warm chest.

"Oy!" The chest exclaimed.

Wait…how could a chest speak? Oh dear my brain was sluggish.

"Amelia! Finally!" A second voice said.

My mind was clearly cloudier than I thought as it took me a short while to realize I was once more in Nori's arms and Dori was once more hovering over me.

"She's exhausted. Carry her in the kitchen' Dori ordered.

-Not her room?' Apparently even Ori was awake.

-She's covered in blood and hasn't had diner or breakfast. She needs to eat and wash up a bit before going to sleep.' Dori explained in a motherly, or maybe fatherly, tone.

-She doesn't look like she'll be able to eat' Ori mused and I guessed he was right.

-We'll have to help her then…

-M fnn…"

I swear it had sounded human in my head, but my mouth didn't feel like cooperating right now. Nori chuckled. Next time I was awake, I'll whack him just for that. Well, if I remembered anything that is, and if he let me too. These dwarves had awfully good reflexes and Nori's were really amazing. Just looking at him catching the plates thrown by his brother at him once, had convinced me of his abilities.

"I'm sorry, what was that?' he said jokingly.

-I said I'm fine!' I enunciated properly. 'I'm just really, really tired.'

-Really, we wouldn't have thought…"

Oh…the nerves of this dwarf. I was busy glaring at him when I realized he was actually holding me in his arms. When exactly had my feet left the ground? I sighed and put my head on his shoulder. I closed my eyes. He might be annoyingly cheeky and smug, but Nori was a very, very comfortable dwarf to sleep on.

"Oy, don't sleep yet.' Nori told me.

-I won't, you can put me down you know." I said, though I really wished he hadn't listened to me this time.

I felt a weird thing in my chest when he removed his arms from around me; I was really more tired than I thought. He helped me sit on the bench in the kitchen and I leaned on the table, letting my head rest on the cool, polished wood. I sighed contentedly at the wonderful smell of Dori's rabbit stew and I waited patiently for him to put a steaming bowl in front of me. The brothers waited just as patiently for me to eat, none of them speaking.

The warm food cleared my mind a bit and I sighed. I felt like I should tell them about what had happened.

"There were five casualties." I said blankly.

They remained silent, their faces grim as I continued.

"I don't know their names though…

-How are you?' Ori asked me, patting my forearm with his large hand.

-I'm fine really, it's just…' I started but couldn't continue, not really realizing yet what I had done.

-You just what?' Dori encouraged me.

-I did something I wasn't supposed to do. In my world I wasn't qualified yet to do it…and I just did it and doing it…

-I'm sorry' Ori interrupted 'But what exactly is it that you did?

-I operated someone."

Their blank look reminded me that I probably should elaborate a bit.

"There was this dwarf; he was unconscious and bleeding in the insides. I opened him and managed to find the wound in his body and then I stitched everything back close. In my world, you can't do that if you're not experienced enough."

They looked at me with surprised faces, clearly uncertain about what to say. Then Dori, the ever nice and encouraging Dori, gently told me.

"You did well. If this dwarf survives, then it'll be incredible. And if he doesn't, at least you'd have tried everything you could. Anyway how can you gain experience if you don't practice?"

His simple logic and words managed to calm my worries, for the time being at least. I knew I would have to think further about it on my own, when my brain would be well-rested. I ate what was left of my stew and stirred with a groan as I heard some of my joints pop loudly.

"Would one of you mind waking me in around six hours? I'll need to go back to the wards, there're many injured people to take care of.

-We'll wake you, don't worry.' Nori said, stopping Dori's protests about my lack of sleep.

-You should let your dress in front of your door after you've changed.' Ori then said, red faced.

-Aye, we'll put it in cold water to remove the blood before it stains it irreparably.' Dori added

-Thanks" I gave them my sweetest, tired smile and stoop up.

I stumbled slightly but Nori's watchful eyes and speedy reflexes caught me before I even registered I was about to fall. I smiled some more at him and he squeezed my waist lightly before releasing his hold. I staggered to my room, feeling as if I had drunk far too much even though I was entirely sober. I quickly changed into clean clothes and let my soiled dress on the floor outside my door. I was asleep already when my head fell on the comfortable pillow.

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><p>The following days were mostly spent in the healing wards and I barely went to the three brothers' home. I usually came back just to change clothes quickly and grab some extra food. Most of the time though I ate in the ward with Dís and Oin as the main kitchen, which cooked food, mostly lunches, for the dwarves working in the forges and mines delivered trays full of delicious dishes to us.<p>

At that time I found out that one of the main cooks was Bombur, Bofur's brother. I also learned that there was a general dining hall where all dwarves could go to eat at almost any time of the day.

I remember stuttering like an idiot when Dís told me she was the King's sister and she laughed quite loudly at my reaction. The days were spent tending to the injured dwarves who slowly got better, save for one who died the day following the accident in the mines. It had been quite hard finding him dead on the bed and I had to hide in the backroom where plants were stored in order to cry.

I knew that I should have been prepared for his death, anyone's death really, as I was a mere healer, not god. Yet it was a terrible experience to find out I had been trying to gently wake a dead person without realizing he was gone immediately.

The wonderful news though, was that my little try at being a surgeon hadn't had terrible results as of yet. A week after the so called operation, the dwarf was still alive, though he was still under constant care in the healing ward and wouldn't be sent back to his home before long.

I had had more time to think about my decision to operate. I couldn't say I felt confident it was a good decision, but as the dwarf was alive, I couldn't really regret it.

Oin and Dís had been impressed but I had told them I had merely been lucky; which was the honest truth as so many things could still go wrong. The both of them were clearly interested with the procedure but I couldn't really teach them anything. First I was far from being an expert and second, I couldn't exactly draw back all the schemas I knew, mostly because I was terrible at drawing. Then again, I really couldn't tell what I would do if another similar situation were to happen.

In a way I really wasn't confident in me, in the rooms and equipments here, and as I had endlessly repeated, so many things could go wrong. But on the other hand, between letting someone die without doing anything and trying everything I could even though there was only a remote chance of success…well I knew what option I'd choose.

Balir, the dwarf I had operated, had awoken once the following day before falling back asleep. He had fully awaken two days after the events and had been shocked to find out I had basically almost gutted him in cold blood.

I could already see my reputation as a cold blooded psychopath spread within the halls.

That made Dís and Bofur laugh quite a lot.

During this time I came to know Dís quite well and I realized she was probably as stern as her brother, though she let herself laugh and smile more often. This, she told me once, was mostly thanks to her two sons who were such troublemakers that she was forced to sometimes laugh or she'd explode from barely contained anger.

Danà came to help us as often as she could and the two women helped me to steadily feel more at ease in this new environment I was still discovering.

After a whole week spent almost entirely in the healing wards, I had met a good part of the dwarves' population. Each family member would come at one point or another to visit their injured kin and it would more often than not degenerate in some sort of cheerful picnic in the wards.

The first time I witnessed the dwarves coming in with whole plates full of roasted meat and barrels of ale, I was flabbergasted. Hadn't it been for Dís being here, the situation would have escalated to a full party. After repeatedly explaining we were in a ward, not a dining hall, and the patients were recovering not simply relaxing, we finally managed to ban such events.

It did take several tries though.

God, how stubborn could they be?

Still, after a week there were only three injured dwarves left in our care. The others had been more or less kicked back home with strict orders not to go to work until express clearance by one of the healers and had to come back regularly to change the bandages.

So far they had all obeyed.

Still we had now the possibility to go back to our own houses too. The three dwarves left in our care didn't need our constant monitoring and I was glad to be able to go relax with the three brothers.

Thus here I was that evening, peacefully lounging in the living room, waiting for the brothers to come back. Dori and Ori were the first to arrive and we all sat, waiting for Nori to come home. The two brothers had been in the middle of a discussion so I had to concentrate to try and catch on.

"How long will it be this time?' Ori asked before taking a long sip of ale from the tankard he had taken in the kitchen.

-Probably around two weeks at least, three more likely. It'll take time to go there with the full wagons.

-That long?

-Aye, the road isn't that good; Dwalin went to scout a bit. He'll be coming too.

-What is going on?' I finally asked.

-I'm leaving tomorrow morning. I'll be going to sell some supplies to a few shop owners in the southern towns.

-And you'll be gone for three weeks?"

I'll admit, even I could hear the worry in my voice so it was no use wondering why Dori and Ori heard it too.

"Don't worry. It's nothing new, I do it every year at the same period.

-Still…

-I have to go now. If we wait we'll risk being stuck in the mud with the wagons.

-Aren't merchants attacked on the road?' I asked, both anxious for him and curious.

-Aye. That's why we have some more dwarves accompanying us.

-Like Dwalin?

-Aye"

I simply nodded. Not really happy for I knew I'd be worried all the time he'll be away. Yet there was nothing I could, or would, do. It was his choice and he was way older than me, clearly old enough to take his decisions wisely. Besides summer was soon going to end and Ori had told me that autumn could be extremely rainy in the mountains, so it made perfect sense for the merchants' caravans to travel before the rains became too strong.

I asked them more questions about his trips and Dori told me some anecdotes about what happened during his long years travelling the roads around.

I laughed heartily not entirely believing that Dwalin had once be surprised, being attacked while he took his bath in a river and had no other choices at the time but to fight the bandits butt naked. Ori, who swore it was quite the renowned story among the Halls, seriously explained that the sheer sight might have scared the scoundrels away.

By the end of the story I was crying from mirth, Ori was laughing heartily too and Dori was chuckling lightly.

Then I asked a question that had been on my mind for a while now

"Dori' I said seriously 'What happened to Bifur? How can he still be, you know, alive?"

Dori seemed to ponder a bit before speaking. He took his pipe out and the small bag that contained the weeds he smoke.

"It's a nasty story, really. Bifur was, still is, a great warrior. He used to go with Dwalin, they usually were hired together as mercenaries. One day the caravan they protected got assailed by goblins. One of them managed to throw his axe in Bifur's head. Bifur got so mad he massacred the creatures. But once the fight was over, Dwalin told us he became suddenly quite withdrawn in an instant. When Dwalin tried to speak with him Bifur didn't react."

I was entirely focused on the story Dori was telling. I could quite clearly picture the wound with blood gushing from it. I nodded at Dori to continue as he lighted his pipe.

"Their contract wasn't honoured yet and Bifur was still functioning quite normally so Dwalin and Bifur escorted the caravan to the point they were supposed to go to. A week or so later they were back here. Bifur still had the whole axe protruding from his head; he had apparently become quite violent when Dwalin had tried to approach him to remove it."

I bit my lower lip, thinking about the hardship and pain the two had surely felt.

"When they arrived, Bofur and Bombur were immediately called and Oin and Dís examined Bifur. The four of them managed to convince Bifur to let them cut the major part of the axe but they didn't dare try and remove it for fear it would kill him.

-And he's been living like that since? Is that the reason why he never speaks?

-Oh he speaks; you just can't understand him. And yes, he's been living like that for what, twenty, twenty-five years now?

-Twenty-five years?' I was astonished. 'You said I can't understand, what do you mean?

-Since he got this axe in his brain, he hasn't uttered a word in Westron, the language we're speaking now. He only speaks few words at a time in Khuzdul and Iglishmêk.

-I'm sorry, what?"

Ori chuckled and Dori gave me a small smile, puffing happily on his pipe. Ori decided to relay his brother and explained to me.

"Khuzdul is our language, nobody besides us speaks it and we're not supposed to use it in front of strangers. Iglishmêk is a sign language only dwarves use and know."

I nodded, not even thinking about being surprised not having heard of those languages yet. Now that I thought about it though I could clearly remember various instance when I had heard dwarves speak or mutter words and curses in a language I couldn't understand. Usually I could hear those strange sounding words when I was in the market or in the corridors.

Truth be told, I hadn't paid much attention to this. My mind was already busy learning about their habits and the healing herbs with Oin, I had no time right now to even think about asking to learn a foreign language.

Knowing the dwarves I had the hunch it would be a fairly complicated language too.

We didn't see Nori that night and I wondered briefly where he was, remembering vaguely that Ori told me once it was usual for him to disappear from time to time. The following day I went to send Dori away at the entrance of the Halls. I was glad I managed not to cry, and I was really surprised to be that affected by his departure. Ori was with me as I stayed under the massive doors until Dori's figure had entirely disappeared in the forests.

For the second night in a row Nori didn't come back and Ori and I spent quite a gloomy evening.

Ori really was easy to read sometimes, his moods were freely displayed on his face. In my eyes that made him an honest and sweet person.

That evening I could see he was upset, feeling down because of something though I didn't know what specifically. It could either be because of Dori's and Nori's absence or because of something else entirely. In any case I didn't think I had any power over it.

I tried my best to cheer him up, deciding even to tell him tales of my home even though it still hurt me deeply to think of it. Yet it didn't change his mood.

* * *

><p>A whole week after Dori's departure, Nori hadn't come back and I was worried. Really worried.<p>

I didn't understand why, but the absence of the second brother was making me really fidgety and anxious. I had had one nightmare in his absence and Ori hadn't been able to soothe me nearly as much as Nori could. I had missed him sorely that night and I missed his calm and silent presence in the apartment. I wondered when he'd come back and wink cheekily while smirking and mocking me about one thing or another.

Ori was sulking and moping in the house, barely talking to me and I was somehow left alone to manage this strange and new situation. Even the sight of dinner consisting only of meat, no vegetables I swear, didn't cheer up the sweet dwarf. Seeing that Ori hadn't pronounced a word in two days, I decided that it was high time to do something, though I had no idea what to do.

I was in the wards with Oin when I asked him how to go to Bofur's place from here. Bofur was, after all, one of the cheeriest persons I knew. Besides he would probably know what was happening with Ori and I was certain he'd help me deal with this situation. He was, from what I could gather, one of the brothers' closest friend, if not the closest.

The old healer nicely told me the directions and, at the end of the afternoon, I decided to go and ask the ever cheerful man for help. I really hoped he'd be able to transform Ori back to his normal, sweet, curious and talkative way. I really missed my sweet friend.

I strode quickly in the corridors, trying to follow Oin's directions, while already thinking about what I would tell Bofur.

I should have known. I really should have. Things in my life were never that easy.

* * *

><p>Why didn't I double check to assure that Oin had understood clearly what I said? Why didn't I ask him to repeat the information?<p>

Was it left after the market's corridor and right after the statue of the dwarf maiden? Or was it straight till the dwarf warrior then twice left and down the stairs?

When had my memory become so messy and useless?

I had been turning around in dark corridors for what seemed like hours now and I was reminiscent of the day I lost my way in the caves before arriving. I felt like I would soon turn claustrophobic too.

I had tried to follow my steps back to the point where I had obviously taken a wrong turn but honestly, nothing looked more like a dwarf made corridor than another dwarf made corridor.

Couldn't they put signs?

I remembered ascending some steps but hadn't found them back. Guessing I had to go down anyway I had taken a corridor that sloped in what I thought to be the general direction of the entrance.

And I had magnificently managed to get myself lost in barely lit corridors. Torches were few and far between, and some smaller corridors were actually only lit by the remnants of lights coming from other paths. If there was light, I thought, at least that meant that someone was bound to come around.

Well apparently not.

Every time I tried to turn back and trace my way back I ended up in some unknown places. I tried to follow the torches and lights, but it didn't lead me anywhere either because those stupid dwarves apparently enjoyed to put torches everywhere, even in corridors they never went to.

I had no idea for how long I turned and walked and turned back round. I found ascending stairs, then descending ones, small passages and short unlit corridors. The more I walked, the further I got lost and I simply couldn't find my way back. Backtracking then turning around left and right, stopping often and talking to myself, I had slowly but surely become entirely confounded by this…this mountain and its dwarves.

Right now I was starting to wonder whether I'll ever find my way back or whether I'll die somewhere from starvation. The weirdest thing being that I felt oddly detached from the whole situation.

Honestly it was all so ridiculous that I couldn't find it in myself to worry at the moment. I had no idea before that day that the corridors went so deep in the mountain. I noticed that the architecture had seemed to change and once I realized why I could have slapped myself for my once again brilliant demonstration of stupidity.

I had somehow manage to find natural caves below the Halls and had, from what I could tell, been walking in paths that hadn't been set up as of yet.

I highly doubted that someone would think about looking for me here so I had only myself to rely on to find my way back.

I was as good as already dead.

The air had become gradually stuffier which indicated that there wasn't much breeze in this unventilated areas. That didn't bode well in my mind. Once more I turned back and walked in the direction I had supposedly come from. I walked back on my steps, arriving at a crossroad. Did I turn left? Or had it been straight? Damn, I was pretty sure I had turned left but this corridor seemed barely lit. I bit my lip.

After a long while, I was truly exhausted. I had been walking nonstop for hours and I didn't doubt night had long since fallen wherever the sky was visible.

It was sheer luck when I found myself on a better lit corridor. I tried to quicken my path but it didn't last long. My legs were burning and I could feel cramps coming and I honestly wished to be able to fall asleep on the floor.

As the thought struck me I eyed the rocky ground with envy. Maybe I could sleep here and find my way back on the morrow? I snorted to myself. I was really tired.

I kept on walking, my thoughts becoming gloomy. With my luck, Ori wouldn't have even realized I had gone missing and Dori and Nori weren't even here anyway. They wouldn't try and find me before at least tomorrow afternoon. In that time span I could as well visit the whole mountain's caves for all I knew.

Grumbling and cursing any and every dwarf I could think of for their inability to put damn signs in their corridors, I kept on walking and walking and walking some more until I really couldn't take it anymore.

Leaning my back against the wall I let myself slide slowly to the ground. With the back of my head against the cool rock I closed my eyes and extended my legs in front of me. It didn't take more than a few minutes for me to fall asleep.

Obviously, my nightmares couldn't leave me alone for one night and chose that exact moment to make their presence known. The deep darkness and the uncertainty of my situation had probably influenced my mind into an anxious setting.

I woke up in a jolt, hitting the wall with my head which caused me to curse loudly. I didn't know how much time had passed but I found myself in a corridor where the lights were pretty dim. I couldn't hear any noise besides the one I was making. Each little scrap of my shoes against the rocks would slowly echo, the sound being scarily distorted in the pathways.

I wondered who and when the dwarves will come to light or change the torches. What was the point to bother lighting torches around here if no one ever came? It made no sense whatsoever.

Being utterly alone in this creepy place, I felt myself grow nervous. Extremely so. The images of my nightmares were still pretty fresh in my mind and I swallowed thickly, trying to calm myself, imagining Nori was here to sooth me.

It didn't work.

Cold sweat ran down my spine and my heart was in a frenzied state. I felt my chest tightened as if imprisoned by a metal case. Suddenly I could barely breathe.

Having a panic attack in the middle of nowhere wasn't probably my best idea but I really had no control over my body at the moment and besides, I wasn't really known for my good ideas. I clenched my fists strongly, feeling some of my nails pierce the skin of my palms.

I tried to apply any trick I could think of, I even tried to hum and sing aloud to break the gloom of the corridors, but the weird echoing of my own voice only frightened me more. Tears were falling on the floor, while my open eyes were unseeing of my surroundings. I wondered at some point whether I'll have a heart attack and die from sheer panic.

That would really be pathetic.

It probably took me around half an hour to regain control over my mind and body and finally stop the uncontrolled trembles that had shaken my body. In that specific moment I sorely missed Dori and his warm cups of chamomile, Nori and his welcoming arms and Ori and his sweet smile and soothing stories.

I started to think about the evenings I had spent together with the three brothers and their friends. I wanted to forget, even for a second, the gloomy light, the suffocating silence and the maze that extended around me in all directions.

I could perfectly remember one evening, almost a month ago; it had been the week before the mine's collapsing.

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><p>Nori sat with his feet put on the small coffee table that was in front of the hearth, between the four chairs. He had taken his wooden pipe out and was filling it with what I wanted to believe to be tobacco. Well I knew it wasn't really but I didn't want to ponder on that.<p>

Dori was already contentedly smoking, puffing small rings of smoke that dissipated slowly in the air. He was looking into the fire and looked happy, simply at ease in the present setting. From time to time he would stroke his finely braided moustache or the long metallic bead in his beard, but other than that he didn't do much.

Ori was in the kitchen at the time and he silently made his way back to the living room, glaring at Nori, trying to force him to remove his feet from the table so that he could put down a tray he had been holding. Nori rolled his eyes and relented, smirking at his younger brother.

I didn't even need to look to know that there were three large tankards filled to the brim with bitter brown ale. I knew Ori would have thought of me and had as well prepared a warm cup of honeyed water, simple tea or chamomile.

It would always amuse me and sadden me both to think I had come to love this drink I didn't care for before. When my aunt would drink chamomile, I would usually take coffee or chocolate. Now though, chamomile had become my compensation to my lack of caffeine and sugary drinks. Besides it felt oddly nice to have such a bridge between my two worlds, something that anchored me to both of them.

That particular evening, I remember nothing special had happened. We had simply drunk together, watching the fire, talking about nothing really. It had been so peaceful. And then there had been a loud knock on the door.

Ori had been the one to let Bofur, Bifur and Bombur in. Peace and calm were gone in a second and I was the silent, well laughing really, witness to a drinking night the likes of which I had never seen before.

Even Dori and Ori had participated, drinking tankards after tankards, laughing loudly. Bofur had won a disgustingly funny belching contest and I swore that I'd never look at them in quite the same way.

"Won't you drink with us lass?' Bofur had asked me then.

-Nah…you lot drink enough as it is.

-We're not even close to have drink enough!' He joyously answered.

-You're already drinking like a fish!" I exclaimed laughing at the face he pulled when he heard that expression.

Then suddenly I could see a twinkle in his warm brown eyes and he laughed loudly before jumping on one of the chairs. I looked at him flabbergasted when he let a long note out and started to merrily improvise a song, clapping in his hand and hitting the table with his feet to mark the tempo. It was a very merry song about fishes living in a pond, which were drunk and wanted to become dwarves…or something like that.

I laughed heartily until Bombur stepped toward me and extended his hand.

"Will you dance a bit lass?"

My huge smile prompted him to grab my hands and we heartily span and jumped and simply danced the way young children could all around the room. I'm ashamed to say I was surprised at Bombur's ability to dance; for someone his size he was damn swift in his moves. Meanwhile Ori ended up stepping on top of the coffee table, dancing and jumping in the air in perfect rhythm with Bofur's improvised song.

After a last spin and Bofur's last note, Bombur made me swirl around. I squeaked when I felt his hands leave mines. I turned around wildly and ended up in Nori's arms, having trouble to catch my breath.

"You alright there?' He asked with his usual smirk.

-Never had so much fun I think.' I managed to answer in between gasps.

-Really?

-I'm not usually the dancing type of person.

-We'll have to change that then.' He said, his eyes seemed to sparkle with mischief as he turned to yell without letting me go 'Oy, Bofur! Another song please!"

Bofur nodded, smiling, and took a wooden flute out of his pocket while Dori grabbed another one, slightly longer. As soon as the first notes floated in the air, Nori was spinning and twirling me around the room, holding me close to him.

I laughed heartily and remember quite well how his grey eyes shined with mirth, how his lips were quirked in a smile and not a smirk. His large hands rested on my waist, guiding me through the room, between the chairs, tables and dwarves. I probably looked weird with red cheeks, completely dishevelled and breathless while laughing, but in that moment I couldn't care less.

Our antics encouraged Ori to jump on the table once more and dance but that all ended when the table broke and Ori landed brutally on the floor. Well it hadn't really ended there, everyone had a good laugh, even Dori and Ori, but then we all calmed down a bit.

* * *

><p>Thinking back, this had been one of many crazy evenings with the dwarves and I had enjoyed every minutes of it.<p>

I was starting to grow fond of life here, I even enjoyed learning with Oin much more than I had ever enjoyed med school. Being a healer here felt somehow more right than my dreams of becoming a surgeon ever had. These trails of thought allowed me to concentrate on something else than my current situation for awhile, soothing my nerves.

Attempting to be optimistic, I started to make plan for the future days and weeks. First of I needed to speak with Oin now that everything was calmer in the ward. I needed to ask him whether he'd mind if I went to ask a smith to forge some particular tools for the ward. During the collapsing event, I remember needing various things that either didn't exist here or that Oin didn't have.

My thoughts about Oin brought forth many memories of time shared with him and Dís. It probably was the thing I enjoyed most around here, never being truly alone. Even during these past weeks with Dori's and Nori's absences, I always had people around to ease my worries and simply to be here. This closeness with people was an entirely new thing for me; no one really, beside my aunt and uncle, had ever cared for me before I arrived there.

And now here I was, utterly alone and once more lost in a dark tunnel. For a second I wondered whether the moment would soon come where I'll be sent back to my world. After all I had arrived here after losing my way in the tunnels of a cave.

I glanced around quickly, checking whether there were any strange, flickering lights around and oddly enough I felt relieved that there wasn't.

Suddenly I didn't know whether to cry or laugh.

I was entirely alone in a dark place, I wasn't certain and even doubted that I would ever find the way back to the habited parts of the Halls. And yet I'd rather stay there than be sent back to my world.

How sick was that?

I closed my eyes and bit my lower lip, silently offering an apology to my aunt and uncle. I wasn't ready yet to go back to them. I was curious about this strange world, my mind was still buzzing with unanswered questions about this place. I felt like I could be someone here, not just a number on a list of students, not just another nameless face in the crowd. No I really wasn't ready to go back to my world. Was it weird, not wanting to go back home?

I shook my head; I didn't want to leave without learning more about this place. And most of all, I didn't want to abandon my friends, not without having first had the possibility to say a proper goodbye.

Sighing I stretched and stood up. I really wanted to find my way back out of this labyrinth now.

* * *

><p><strong>AN: First, I'd like to thank (like always) the reviewers: Sarah0406, BrazilianLOTRFan, and the guest who reviewed last chapter and Alicia457, Pergjithshme, and Adeleidhis for the chapter before that. It really means a lot! thanks for the support! **

**Thanks to the new followers and favorites too! **

**So I hope you enjoyed this chapter. Yes, I know, I couldn't kill the operated dwarf, but I honestly believe it's possible he'd survive. Besides, he's a dwarf, there supposed to be strong...right?**

**And yes...I do enjoy to create trouble for Amelia. :) **

**I don't know when I'll be able to update next. Maybe this weekend but I can't promise anything this time.**


	11. To drink like a Dwarf

**Everything belongs to JRR Tolkien **

* * *

><p>I would never get out of this labyrinth alive...<p>

Maybe my ghost would manage to escape, but I for one was ready to give up soon. I had the feeling I had been running around in circles, even though I couldn't recognize the place I was currently in.

I was feeling a strange mixture of despair and anger.

Anger at myself for stupidly getting stuck in another situation. Anger at the dwarves for not putting doors and signs forbidding the entrance of their maze, or at least tell people they were about to enter an intricate mix of corridors that led straight to hell.

Oh! Now I had a catchy song to whistle.

I'm on a highway to hell…crap, focus Amelia, focus.

I sighed deeply. I wondered what my friends would do when they'd realize I had disappeared. Ori would probably be quite concerned. I felt bad already for adding to his trouble. I shouldn't have tried to go like this, alone in the Halls, looking for Bofur. I should have found another way to help Ori.

Well, what was done, was done. No need to dwell on it now.

I wondered whether Oin would feel guilty or not? In all honesty, it wasn't his fault I had lost my way. I should have stopped walking as soon as I had realized I was lost. Dís would probably scold the poor old dwarf. I winced at that thought. Dís would either end up scolding me for being so light headed or she would crush me into a hug. I believed it more likely that she would scold me though. Danà on the other hand would certainly fuss over me just like Dori would if he were there.

I couldn't help but smile at the thought of the two women.

Dís and Danà had self proclaimed themselves my teachers of all things womenfolk around should know. They were usually talking about dresses and beads. They were always curious about my cooking recipes and encouraged me to try them on the three brothers. Well I knew now that they were doing it mostly because they thought Dori, Nori and Ori needed a strong woman's hand to keep them in line. I didn't know if I was strong or even able to keep them in line, but I could humour my two friends.

Most of the time though, we mostly chitchatted about our days; what was available in the market and other meaningless things. I smiled for myself when I remembered the events of two days before Dori's departure.

* * *

><p>It had been something that had started to bother me quite a bit. Of course I was the only one to see and even know about it, but it was about a notion so ingrained in my brain that I just couldn't let it pass. I had to find a bloody razor to shave my legs and armpits in a place where people loved to be hairy. Talk about a challenge.<p>

I really didn't feel like trying to use one of the wards' so called scalpel, and the huge knives, daggers and blades I could find in the brothers' apartments simply looked too...lethal. I had resigned myself then to shamefully ask Dís and Danà while we were gathered around a wonderful honey cake, Dís had baked. We were sitting in the kitchen, drinking tea and snacking while the brothers were absent.

"What is bothering you' Dís asked me before continuing 'And yes, it is easy to see something is bothering you and you're hesitating to ask us."

I bit my lower lip while they patiently waited for me to gather some courage.

"Well it's…I mean…hem. Do you know where I could find a razor?' My voice had lowered to an almost whisper.

-A razor? Dear pardon me for being blunt, but you don't have any beard to trim.' Danà looked extremely sad, as if my lack of beard was a grave affliction. Well I guess here it kind of was.

-It's not to trim a beard. It's…where I come from we shave.' I tried to explain.

-You shave?' Dís and Danà asked together, clearly not understanding what I meant.

-We shave our…legs, and armpits and … you know, there." I pointed with my finger to my pubis, cheeks already red with embarrassment.

In the silence that followed I immediately grabbed my cup of tea before gazing upwards while I sipped it.

I froze before spitting all the tea I had sipped on the table. Coughing loudly, chocking and feeling as if my face was literally on fire. Dís and Danà quickly went to me and finally understood the reason of this weird reaction I had, just after confessing an oddity they couldn't comprehend.

There, in the entrance of the kitchen, stood Nori, who was probably as red as I was. He had quickly mumbled something, sputtering some words before turning around and leaving once more.

After that, Dís and Danà had told me dwarves never shaved, merely using razors to trim their beard into intricate designs. We never talked about it again, and I looked at my legs forlornly more than once after this discussion.

To my utter shame and embarrassment, Nori disappeared the day after he overheard our odd talk. Yet I couldn't believe he had left us just because of that, it'd be just too strange.

* * *

><p>I wouldn't mind feeling shame and embarrassment right now if it meant I would get out of these tunnel-like corridors quickly.<p>

Being stuck alone in the dark wasn't really good for my sanity apparently. I wanted to yell when suddenly a strange noise echoed against the walls.

My first reaction was fear. What if there was another wall collapsing and I really ended up stuck under there forever? Well, it was true, given how hungry I already was that forever wouldn't last long but still. And it would be even worse if I ended up stuck under the collapsed rocks.

I waited for long seconds for the tremor that should logically made the walls, floors and ceilings tremble. But nothing came.

Then I realized that the sound hadn't stopped. Still it echoed in the corridors, preventing me to locate where it came from.

Concentrating on it while hope was building inside my chest, I soon distinguished different voices, though I couldn't recognized them.

"Hello?" I said, but obviously not loud enough. I repeated the same word, loudly this time, and waited.

My heart fell in my stomach when only complete silence answered me. Had I imagined the noise? Was I having hallucinations? That wasn't a good sign, and it could mean way too many creepy things. Was I breathing enough oxygen? Had I hit my head too strongly on the wall? Was I already dead? Oh please, I didn't want to die like this…it was just so stupid.

"Milady?" A strong voice reached me through the echoes.

I straightened immediately. My eyes were wide open, trying to catch some figures, some light but there was nothing. Still, I hadn't dreamed that word now, had I?

"Hey! Please can you help me?" I said in as loud a voice I could without actually shouting.

The echo ran away in the corridors while I stayed put.

"We're looking for you. Don't move. Talk lowlier."

I could have danced here and now when I heard that. I suddenly felt giddy, people were coming to my rescue, how awesome was that?

"Do you have torches with you?" I asked in a loud voice though much lower than before.

Still I could hear the difference in the echo as it didn't quite bounce around as much. I didn't feel afraid anymore, though I was wondering whether my rescue team would know the way back. That would be funny if they got lost too. Well you had to appreciate dark, morbid humour but still, it'd be ironic.

"We have two of them." The same voice informed me.

"Well I don't see anything yet if that's useful for you."

I heard a chuckle. I could swear I just heard a chuckle. The bastard was having fun. Worse than that, he was having fun at my expense.

"Oy' I said, a smirk tugging on my lips 'Next time you laugh I'll whack your head!"

This time he laughed heartily and the genuine sound made me smile.

"Do you see the torches yet?" There was a second voice and it was clearly amused.

Maybe the laugh had come from him.

"Nope. Were you the one to laugh or was it your chuckling friend?"

This time I heard the two of them laugh and I couldn't resist, I chuckled as well.

"Milady, are you sure you need rescuing? Your obvious merriment says otherwise."

"Don't you dare leave me alone here!" I almost shouted.

"Wow, not so loud, we can't locate you with the echo. Can you speak normally now?"

It was slightly awkward to have such a discussion in this situation. I suddenly remembered phone calls and how it felt to speak with someone from afar without saying his face to identify the emotions. Had I truly enjoyed that? Now that I was living here, I was getting used to actually talk with people. I enjoyed being able to see their reactions, it was much nicer like this.

"Milady? Are you alright?"

The voice sounded uncertain and it brought me back to the present time. Apparently my silence was worrying them. Choosing to ignore their question I finally asked.

"You sure you two won't get lost too?"

They were laughing when I believed I saw some brighter light flicker at the end of the corridor I was currently in.

"Wait! Don't move!" I told them before jogging toward the end of the corridor. When I arrived I could see the brightness was actually coming from another corridor.

"Milady?' One of them questioned.

-Wait!' I simply said quickly jogging along the second corridor.

-You're close by!' The second voice exclaimed and I laughed.

-I know, I can see the lights of your torches."

After one more corridor, which was definitely smaller, I turned to find myself face to face with two young dwarves. One was blond, the other dark haired. One had a nicely growing beard braided under his chin in two thin tresses with nicely chiselled beads at the end. The second barely had stubble on his chin.

"Hello there.' I said with a huge smile before adding 'Are you two real or am I imagining this?"

They looked at me with huge eyes and I gingerly poked in the shoulder of the dark haired one.

"Oy!' He said before starting to chuckle.

-You're real!' I joyously exclaimed before playfully whacking his arm. 'And that's for laughing at me earlier."

At that the two of them started to laugh heartily and I soon joined them. We took several minutes to calm down and after that I offered them a huge smile.

"I don't know if you came here looking for me or if it's just luck, but I'm glad you came.

-You're welcome milady.' The blond one said.

-You know, I'm really no lady. Call me Amelia.

-I'm Fili, and this is my brother Kili.' The blond said before bowing and chorusing with his brother. 'At your service.

-Amelia, at yours.' I gave the customary reply before asking what bugged me. 'Please tell me we're close to the surface, I'm starving and Ori is probably worried."

The two of them offered me wide toothy grins and Fili answered me once more.

"Ori's beside worried, he's running around wildly and our uncle is probably mad at being bothered by him.

-And we're actually quite far. Sorry but how did you end up here?' Kili asked with a cheerful glint in his eyes.

-Seriously? I have no idea.' I deadpanned and they both laughed

-Let's go Milady, we better go now. You've been absent a long time.' Fili said, still chuckling.

-Have I? I really couldn't tell.

-Well, Ori came to tell us he couldn't find you around sunset. By then he had already found out that Master Oin had probably given you weird directions.

-Sunset is past? Really?' I was honestly surprised by this information.

-Dawn is pretty close actually." Kili shrugged.

At those words I stopped and looked at them.

"You're joking, right?

-Nope!"

It was slightly disturbing to hear them answer in a chorus but I was more worried at that time about Ori's state. The poor dwarf was probably sick with worries. Then I remembered why I got lost to begin with and made an oath to myself to make up for it to the poor upset Ori.

In the meantime I asked the two brothers a question that had turned in my mind for quite some time while I was lost in the corridors.

"Why are there torches down there? It doesn't make sense to light torches in those obviously unused corridors.

-We lighted them this morning, hem yesterday morning. Our uncle wanted to check with several others if we could possibly try to dig in some other parts of the mountain. We're trying to find another spot to mine.' Fili shrugged and explained.

-Yeah, they hope to find some more precious stones. We can only find some crystals or very small veins. They went down there to try and determine whether they could maybe open a second mine somewhere around.' Kili was slightly more enthusiast in his explanation.

-And how did you know to look for me here?' I wondered.

-Well. The others couldn't find you anywhere and no one saw you going out. It only made sense that you were still in the mountain. We were here with our uncle earlier and we used to come and play in those corridors.' Fili started to explain.

-Play? In here?' I interrupted him, disbelievingly.

-Aye! Our Ma would usually come down there yelling and she would scold us for being reckless dunderheads.' Kili replied happily, making me smile.

-Any way, we volunteered to have a look around here and it's a good thing we did, right?' Fili smirked at me and I felt a slight blush on my cheeks, ashamed to have lost my way so stupidly.

-Thanks for that." I simply answered.

It took us one hour, or so Fili said, to walk back in the habited parts of the Halls. As we walked in the main hall where I had met the King for the first time, I saw quite a crowd and it stopped me dead in my track.

Surely they weren't here to wait for me, right?

Fili realized I had stopped and looked at me questioningly.

"Are you alright Amelia?

-Why are all these people here?' I squeaked in a low whisper and to my horror he smirked.

-Well milady, a good part of them has been looking around for you and gathered back here after I suppose."

Oh the shame. Oh the horror.

How could I face them all? I was absentmindedly playing with the beads in my braid, wondering whether I should just run away back into the dark corridors and die from shame there when I spotted a well known face among the crowd. And just because of that forlorn face I couldn't run away, I had to go to him and apologize profusely.

"Ori!" I exclaimed and quickly jogged to him.

He had turned quickly when he heard me and all discussion had stopped in the Hall, but I didn't care because Ori, once he saw me, smiled for the first time in days. I embraced him warmly and was happy to feel him respond to my hug in an equal manner.

"Ori, I'm so sorry. I got lost again in the tunnels.

-Are you alright? Are you hurt?' he asked worriedly stepping back from our hug to luck at me at arm's length.

-I'm perfectly fine, just tired and famished!"

A booming laugh resonated behind me and I blushed terribly at the scene I had just displayed for all the dwarves to see.

"Oy lass, if you want'd to 'ave a visit o' the caves, you should 'ave ask'd!"

I recognized him as one of the miners who had been severely hurt and my eyes instantly narrowed at him.

"What are you doing here? You should be in bed."

This time the laugh was coming from various well known voices. Bofur, Danà and Dís were close. Looking around to find them, my eyes met those I really wished not to see. My gaze instantly went to the floor as my blood froze in my veins.

"I remember telling Dori, while you were standing right here' he pointed at a spot on the floor nearby 'That I didn't want you to roam about alone. There was a reason to that, you're just like a child, stupidly running around and causing everyone to worry."

There was an uneasy shift in the crowd and everyone remained silent.

I really hated being scolded like a child when really my only fault was to have a supremely bad sense of directions. Suddenly the anger I had felt in the darkness of the corridors came back to bubble inside my chest. I suddenly lifted my gaze and looked straight into the King's eyes.

"I'm sorry my lord, but really, you should put doors, barriers or at least some signs to prevent stupid children to get lost.

-I beg your pardon?' Ooh he was angry, well I was too and I was the one who had spent a night worrying in those creepy corridors.

-I'm serious. It's monstrously dangerous in there. I didn't want to go down there. I got lost and I'm sorry I caused troubles to everyone, really I am. But you should put some signs, all those freaky corridors look exactly the same. I'm even surprised we managed to go back out and, I'm sorry to say, but I'm still not convinced there wasn't a shorter way back up."

The last part I had said while turning towards the two younger dwarves. Fili turned to face the King and talked before the icy eyes could kill me on the spot.

"She's kind of right there uncle. Even Kili and I got lost more than once in there and we lost time backtracking repeatedly."

This dwarf was the nephew of the King? Then he was Dís' son, one of the two troublemakers. I glanced toward the woman and she offered me a small, warm smile. I was brought back to the discussion with the King when he finally spoke.

"Very well. I'll see to it we find a way for headless people not to get lost anymore."

Hem, the last part was for me, clearly, but I couldn't be offended as he wasn't really wrong there.

Soon all the dwarves were dismissed and I stayed with Ori and the royal family in the room. I cleared my throat and turned towards the younger dwarves.

"Thank you, both of you. I was really starting to think I'll starve alone in there.' Turning back toward the King I simply said 'And I'm truly sorry for this whole mess. I just wanted to find someone's house and misunderstood the directions. I'm really sorry and I won't walk around alone again if I go in some new places, I swear."

The King observed me and nodded before answering in a calm voice that anger had left.

"You have to understand, these Halls are made, sculpted in natural cavities. There are many tricks and natural traps in some corridors. You were lucky to come out of it at all.

-I know that. I understand what you mean, and you are right of course.

-Don't go in unknown parts unaccompanied. Dwarves have a good instinct when we're underground; it's a part of what we are. You may live here with us, but you're still human. Our halls may prove dangerous for you."

I nodded, expressing my understanding silently.

"I'll be more careful, I promise. My mind was preoccupied and I didn't stop to think when I first realized I got lost. That was my first mistake. It won't happen again.

-I'm sure it won't. Go back to your place now."

I slightly bowed my head and turned toward Ori who had been, just like Dís, a silent witness. Before I could say anything though, Danà caught me in a very tight embrace and when she freed me, Bofur came to pat my shoulder.

"You gave us quite a scare there, lass.

-I'm truly sorry for that." And I really meant it.

They all ignored it and simply told me to try and be more careful. I was quite impressed by their abilities to forgive my mistakes. Still, I wouldn't complain about that. After being scolded, slightly, by the King, I was glad my friends weren't angry at me. As we were slowly retreating, I asked Ori, who was holding my arm.

"Ori, do you think we'll find something warm to eat at this time?

-I'm sure there'd be some stew, dawn isn't far and Bombur was awake all night long, waiting for news from you.' He said with a soft smile, guiding me towards the dining hall.

-He was? Oh my, I really caused trouble to many people, didn't I?' I said forlornly

-Don't be like that. We were worried because we care."

His simple way of presenting this, made tears pool in my eyes. I was thankful that Danà and Bofur had chosen to walk a bit ahead of us, it was a nice gesture. I quickly brushed the few tears away and smiled at one of my favourite dwarves.

"Thanks Ori, you're an amazing friend."

* * *

><p>What was supposed to be a quick bite of hot stew, ended up in an impossibly large improvised party. The kind only dwarves I believe are able to organize in such short notice. Barrels of ale were rolled into the room, Bombur and the other cooks presented us with roasted meat, stewed meat, braised meat, ham, cheeses, lots of breads, cakes and pastries and few vegetables and fruits.<p>

I was forced to sit at the centre of the main table when Bofur winked at me and quickly stepped on the table. Quickly people around quieted down all eyes were on him.

"Oy, lads, lasses, do you wish to hear an old, famously adventurous story?"

A general roar and a rain of applause made him bow lowly before starting with his story.

"There was once a lady, a maiden really now that I think about it. Well she wasn't so much of a maiden and more of a strange little lass. So there was this lady, who was a maiden, who was a strange little lass, who once decided to go explore the whole wide world. Well, she ended up in an old abandoned dwarf's mine."

His playful wink made me smile as I listened to his silly story.

"She ended up roaming the halls, which couldn't be called halls as it was more caves. And when I say cave, I mean dark, damp corridors that weaved endlessly in the mountain's belly. So there she was, mindlessly walking in those halls, well caves, when suddenly… an impossibly loud roar troubled the calm and peace of the place."

I was surprised to see everyone so silent, listening intently as Bofur created his story in front of us. I found myself quite engrossed in his tale, even though I knew perfectly well that he was mocking me.

"The cheeky lass, who was a maiden, who was really more of a strange little lady, came up with the idea that a wild dragon was sleeping under her feet. She didn't think twice about it, and immediately decided to do what every incredibly witted person would do…she went deeper into the mountain."

Some chuckles were already being heard around as Bofur was putting on quite the show, gesturing and mimicking wildly, kicking plates out of his way and looking around at his audience.

"After awhile being lost, well she wasn't really lost as she knew perfectly where she was, that is under the mountain in a magnificent dwarf's Hall, or more realistically a dingy corridor. She still kept on following the melodious sound of the beast's voice which roared and roared to no end."

From the corner of my eyes I could see the King's nephew elbowing each other and smirking. The King wasn't far behind them, he stood with Balin and Dís and they all were listening to Bofur.

"Arriving at a corner she realized the majestic deathly creature with wings was in the next room. The roars were gone now and she tiptoed into the corridor, preparing herself for anything and everything really. Bursting in she ended up facing two foolish dwarflings who got lost themselves in the old paths. They were dwarves though, so following their mighty instinct they had ended up in the old cellars where ageless barrels of ale had been stored. No sooner were the barrels found that they were opened as well. Lost, the three of them still are."

Bofur turned and faced me, his eyes twinkled mischievously and he asked loudly, though I knew he was speaking to me directly.

"And do you know what the moral of this tiny story is?"

I shrugged and said

"Don't trust dwarves as architects unless you wish to live in a maze?"

My silly banter was quite successful and many dwarves burst into fit of laughter. Bofur shook his head and waited for some lull in the laughs before saying.

"Nope. That wasn't it, but I like yours better so we shall keep it."

Everyone cheered as he bowed once more and jumped back on the floor, quickly grabbing a tankard of ale and entering one drinking contest or another.

* * *

><p>All in all it was quite late in the morning when Ori and I finally arrived back home. To be honest neither of us was walking straight, though my unsure steps were caused equally from tiredness and the ale I had finally accepted to drink.<p>

The dwarves' cheers as I chugged down my very first tankard of ale had been deafening. And the result was the following situation; I was tipsy, well drunk really, tired and unable to walk straight.

Ori on his part was really way past tipsy. He was totally drunk too and I had been afraid at some point that he wouldn't find his way back home. When I had voiced my concern though, he had heartily laughed and had simply started to walk.

Now we were laughing loudly without any real reason when we crossed the threshold, holding on each other. We stumbled in, wobbling on our feet and laughing at our own antics when a startled and concerned voice exclaimed.

"There you are! What were you doing?

-Nori!" I joyously cried out.

I don't believe my brain was functioning at that instant for I found it was perfectly natural for me to run to him, jump in his arm and had I not been wearing a dress, my legs would have been circling his waist. I was clinging to him strongly, obviously happy to see him back.

The surprised dwarf staggered and managed in extremis to find his balance. His arms encircled my waist, holding me up against him, and he blinked at me.

"Are you alright?"

I opened my mouth to answer but my brain decided to shut down and I couldn't find any words to say. Nori seemed to sniff slightly in my direction then glanced at Ori who was chuckling madly, leaning against a chair. Well he was actually falling on it very slowly which made me chuckle too.

"Are you both drunk? What have you been doing? I was mad with worry!

-You should ask Bofur, he made a funny tale about this girl who went in the mountain and got lost. I'm so proud, it's the first time I am someone's muse. It was so funny when he said it and then we drank and the others were laughing and…' I rambled without taking a breath.

-Stop." Nori said firmly though nicely, smirking at me.

I obeyed without even thinking and closed my mouth, awaiting the next order. I looked into his grey eyes, discerning both amusement and concern in them. I smiled widely at him. Ale and exhaustion apparently made me foolishly happy.

"Breathe" There it was.

Breathing in and out deeply, I slowly started to feel lightheaded.

"I'm tired" I whispered, letting my head fall on his shoulder.

How many times had I found myself in such a position already? At that moment I didn't care. I nuzzled my nose further in his beard while Nori gently held me up in his arms and carried me back to my bedroom. He held me close to him and I felt oddly content. I hummed slightly in his beard, eyes closed.

My mouth was apparently entirely disconnected from my brain as I started to ramble again.

"Your beard is so soft, so comfortable. I like it."

I was too tired and drunk to feel his steps falter at that. I didn't see his face either but had I been conscious of my surroundings and words at the time, I would have guessed Nori's cheeks were now red as ripe tomatoes.

I would have been right.

* * *

><p>When I woke up, I was disorientated and I had the urgent need to press both my hands on my temples, trying to make the pounding stop. I had this picture in the forefront of my mind of a small army of dwarves stuck in my head and trying to get out. I groaned and muttered an unintelligible 'stop it' to said army, to no avail unfortunately.<p>

Slowly sitting up I let my bare feet fall on the cool stone floor. The coldness of the rock brought me slowly back to reality and I could finally start to gather my thoughts. I couldn't remember anything past Bofur's story.

I slowly stood up, noticed I was still fully clothed and leaned heavily on the wall for support. With difficulties I managed to walk towards the kitchen. When I pushed the door opened, I grunted at the light and noise. I didn't pay attention to anyone and made my way to the bench, falling on it more than sitting.

Eyes barely opened and vision blurry I felt around with my hands to find something to eat. I could hear whispers and chuckles around and I groaned loudly when someone put a large tankard in front of me. I tried to push it away from my sight, earning some more chuckles when a voice I knew quite well told me.

"It's water. Drink some."

My feelings toward the tankard changed radically and I grabbed it quickly, before avidly drinking the fresh liquid. Then the same kind hand put some bread and honey cakes in front of my eyes and I could have cried from happiness.

As I ate, my brain finally decided to kick in and start working. I blinked a few times and glanced around, recognizing Bofur, Bifur and Bombur with Nori and Ori. Bofur cheeky smirk didn't help with my headache and the food and water in my stomach didn't help my mood.

"Don't you have a house?" I grunted at Bofur who only chuckled.

I sighed deeply, holding my head in my hands and eyes closed. Why did I drink so much? What happened and what time was it now? I was too tired and lazy to ask those questions but they still bugged me. I concentrated on Bofur's voice to discern the meaning of his words.

"Well, we do have a house."

I knew he was tempting me on purpose, I knew he would have a cheeky reply. Yet I couldn't find it in myself to stay silent.

"Then why, pray tell, don't you go there?

-Well after your adventures, I'm afraid to get lost in our dwarfish maze."

I glared at him and groaned loudly.

"I hate you, you know?

-Nope. You love me for I'm full of charms!" He dared reply happily and damned it but he was right.

I glanced at Nori and was slightly taken aback by his clear lack of amusement. He appeared to be quite annoyed with something. Looking at Ori I found my dear sweet friend looking both sheepish and put out. I frowned but chose to remain silent as Bofur and the other two were here.

"What time is it?' I chose to ask instead.

-A little after dawn.' Bombur gently replied while taking another serving of scrambled eggs on his plate.

-How is that possible?' I stupidly came up with.

-Well, when one sleep off his ale for a whole day and night…he tends not to remember much of the time passing.

-Bofur, I say it again and I mean it, I hate you."

He gave me a toothy grin in reply and I sighed. Nori and Ori were still silent and it was greatly disturbing me, for I felt something had happened while I slept off the alcohol. Head still pounding I drank some more water to rehydrate and then moaned to no one in particular.

"Next time, please, remind me not to drink so much.

-Oh that'd be a shame to do so lass!

-Bofur…' This man never stopped.

-You were wonderfully adapting to our culture. Chugging tankards after tankards, everyone was impressed.' He said nodding and smiling 'And you were most amusing when you started to participate in drinking games with us."

He sent me another cheeky wink before finally saying.

"Yep, you definitely drank like a dwarf back then!

-Well I'm not that proud of it you know.' I eyed him and said 'And how come I'm the only one feeling hangover now?

-Well you drink like a dwarf…but you're really just a little human girl, no way you'd be able to take your ale as well as we do!

-Bloody alcoholics" I muttered when he started to laugh heartily.

* * *

><p><strong>AN: Thanks to everyone who reads this story and those of you who reviews :) **

**I hope you enjoyed this chapter and the apparition of Fili and Kili, and don't worry, I'll explain Nori's behaviour. **

**I'll try to update Monday, but it might be complicated. Anyway you'll have the next chapter early next week. **

**Thanks for your support! It's greatly appreciated :) **


	12. Hide and Seek

**I don't own anything, except for my OC and the plot.**

* * *

><p>After Bombur finished the plates of food left on the table, he Bifur and Bofur decided it was high time for them to go to work and they left us, Ori, Nori and me, alone.<p>

I was greatly disturbed by the heavy silence and growing tension that immediately started to build up as soon as the entrance door closed behind Bifur's back.

I eyed the two brothers, feeling entirely too hangover to deal with siblings issues, I could barely remember what happened during the previous night. I sighed though, preparing myself for what would likely be a complicated and heated discussion. I suddenly wished Dori was here, he at least knew his brothers perfectly. I was certain he would only need to look at them to understand what was happening.

I had no clue why they both seemed to grow angrier and angrier. I honestly couldn't believe they were angry at me but I couldn't be sure. We remained in silence for awhile, sitting in the kitchen, each one at one of the table's corners. Nori and Ori were currently trying to burn holes in the table with their eyes and I was glancing from one to the other.

"Well, what's going on? Something's wrong?" I simply said.

How I wished I had simply shut up and had decided to simply go back to sleep. As soon as I spoke Nori's eyes found mine and I realized how upset and angry he actually was. I instinctively moved back a bit and his eyes widened slightly before he averted his look.

Ori was still silent and I repeated my question, sliding closer to him and nudging him slightly on the shoulder when Nori finally decided to speak. He didn't look at us though.

"You could have been hurt, that's what's wrong." He snapped.

I blinked. Again? We were back to that 'you could be hurt, we, strong men, protect you, poor women' talk? And here I thought something really important had happened.

"I'm fine. Are you angry at me because I got lost?" I was astonished at the idea he could be angry because of such a thing.

After all I hadn't run away. I hadn't desired to get lost. I had tried to find my way back. And most of all, I was here now and nothing had happened besides the King's scolding.

"I'm not angry at you for getting lost, I'm angry at Ori for letting it happen." He growled, rubbing his eyes with one of his hands.

At hearing his name I glanced toward Ori. Now I could see he wasn't angry as such as he was…wait was it shame he felt? Anger started to rise in my chest and I glared at Nori who still avoided looking back at me. Ori had no reason to feel guilty. He hadn't even known I wanted to go and see Bofur. Besides he had been so obviously worried and relieved when I had been found.

"I'm sorry, what? How can you be angry at him?" I snapped.

Apparently my tone both stupefied and angered Nori some more. He ended up glaring at me and I saw him exhale and inhale slowly.

"It shouldn't have happened. Ori was responsible of you in my and Dori's absence." He growled, grinding his teeth.

My eyes narrowed at him and my anger grew tenfold.

"It's not his fault I got lost in the Halls. He wasn't even here.

-That's the point, he should have!' Nori snapped back

-I'm not a child! I don't need someone holding my hand and walk me everywhere!' I shouted exasperated.

-Clearly you do!" He yelled back at me, his control finally snapping.

From the corner of my eyes I could see Ori staring at us, wide eyed and open mouthed. Clearly he hadn't expected me to yell back at Nori. He was obviously too astonished to speak. At the same time I could feel a vicious, boiling feeling brewing in my chest, waiting to explode and break loose.

I didn't know whether it was because my head was already pounding, or whether it was justified anger on my part, but I wasn't about to let Ori down. I had to defend him. I just had to.

I glared at Nori who glared right back at me.

"And where were you?' I asked in a much too sweetly tone. 'You disappeared without even saying goodbye. Ori was clearly upset and I was worried. You have absolutely no right to scold him for something he had no influence on.

-I have every right to scold him! I'm his brother!" clearly the first part of my speech had been lost in his stubborn mind.

I felt anger boil in my veins and a strange realization came to my mind. I was going to slap him, I knew it. If he kept on being so damn stubborn I might just do it. That dwarf was going to learn to behave in a proper manner, I swear.

"Being his brother doesn't give you the right to behave like an ass! I was lost, and found back! No harm was done. Now let's forget about it.' I insisted.

-You could have been hurt! You don't realize how dangerous those caves can be. Anything could have happened. It was his duty to protect you in our absence, he didn't. He didn't even manage to bring you home properly; you were both completely drunk and arrived in the morning. I was waiting for you guys, sick with worry!

-And we were sick with worry for you for weeks!' I screeched. 'If I chose to get drunk that's my business, not yours. Ori has been great, wonderful even during all the time I've known him." I shouted at him, standing up and moving around the table.

I was standing next to him right now. Pointing a finger right at his scowling face I snarled.

"And don't try and tell me what the risks and consequences are. I know them as much as you do. I am the healer. I am the one who sees injured dwarves every week. I am the one with their blood on my hands."

I knew I was exaggerating this but his reaction had been uncalled for. When I saw his eyes narrow at me and his mouth open I knew I had to say something before he actually managed to say words I couldn't forgive.

When I spoke I couldn't recognize my own voice for the one I heard was cold and unfeeling.

"If you desire so much to point fingers at guilty people, then my dear, you shall point at yourself. I got lost to begin with because I tried to find someone who could tell me where the bloody hell you disappeared and how I could cheer up Ori."

I took a step back from him, not looking at him I glanced toward Ori. The next words I said were in my most caring voice.

"Ori, I'll see you later. Take care and don't worry I would never, ever even think about holding you responsible for this mess. I just need to change my mind for now."

I managed to smile at him before turning away. I stepped out of the kitchen. It didn't take long though before Nori caught up with me and stopped me. He caught my wrist and forced me to face him. He looked furious. The fact that his wrath was directed at me hurt me more than I could have imagined it would. His grey eyes were clouded with rage and his braided brows were deeply furrowed.

"Don't you understand I'm entitled to be worried?' He growled.

-I told you already, behaving like you do is inexcusable. You're not entitled to behave like this.' I snapped.

-Can't you imagine what it felt like, coming home at dawn, believing you're all safe and sound in your rooms and waiting for you to wake up just to find out after hours that you all but disappeared? I had no idea where Ori or you were. I had no idea where to look for you. I could only wait here, useless. Can you imagine what thoughts crossed my mind?" He growled.

Even though I was listening to him, even though he managed to make me feel slightly guilty, I still couldn't muzzle my anger. Nori took a deep breath, closing his eyes for a second and then looked once more directly in my eyes.

"Then you come back after dawn, both drunk, do you imagine how I could have felt?' He groaned, teeth gritted.

-Yes, I imagine perfectly.' I interrupted him, still too angry to have a normal conversation with him. 'You left us alone without giving us a word, not even a goodbye. Maybe your brothers are used to your behaviour, but I am not. I was worried. Ori was sad. What was I to do?

-Not getting bloody lost in those unused corridors!" He snapped.

We glared at each other and I felt my heart tear slightly. It hurt. It hurt like hell to get cross with Nori. He wasn't supposed to glare at me, he was supposed to hold me safe. Still, I couldn't condone his attitude towards both Ori and me. I squared my shoulders, holding his intense gaze.

"I had to wait.' He said in a much lower tone, though still obviously furious. 'I had to wait until this morning for Bofur's bloody happy chatter to learn you had gotten lost. And then you behave like nothing happen, happily chatting away with him, like everything's normal, like you don't care.

-Because it's nothing…' I tried to say before he cut me.

-It's not! You could have died down there, and then what? What do you think I…we'd have felt like?

-You try to put the blame on me. Like I said, had you been there, had I known where you were in the first place, I wouldn't have roamed around in the Halls. Think about your own behaviour and how it affects the others before trying to change mine!" I finally snarled at him, fuming.

I turned away and felt Nori's hand trying to grab my wrists once more but I quickly jerked away from him, not even glancing in his direction, and said in the coldest voice I had ever used.

"Don't you dare touch me or talk to me until you finally understand I might be your ward but I'm not your puppet to order around. I'm not to be imprisoned for fear I'll break at the softest breeze."

I walked briskly through the main door, resisting barely the urge to slam it behind me. I roamed the corridor in an angry haste, vision blurred and my mind frantic with fury. I needed to occupy my thoughts with something or I'd go back there to slap that dwarf.

Had I paid attention I would have heard a dull thud resonating behind me. Had I been a little mouse, maybe I would have seen Nori punching the door violently behind me. Maybe I would have seen that he was just as upset as I was about our dispute. Maybe I would have seen how hurt he was.

I wasn't a little mouse though.

I saw nothing.

I couldn't know.

As I walked quickly through the corridors, the thought struck me that I could actually start to work on one of my little ideas. Now seemed actually like the perfect time for it, as it would free my mind from my current problems.

When I burst through the doors of the main hall I quickly looked around and was relieved to see the dwarf I had been looking for. I slowed down my rapid pace for I realized he was currently speaking with the King and Dís. I went as close as I dared and stopped quite some steps away, letting them continue their discussion privately.

The King had seen me and his intense gaze observed me for a while as Balin spoke. He didn't say a word, or at least I didn't see his mouth move, and he simply nodded in my direction. Balin looked around and smiled once he saw me, gesturing for me to come forward. His smile diminished though when he saw my scowl and I could see Dís was curious about it.

"How are you my dear? Is something the matter?"

His voice was kind and showed his concern. I inhaled slowly and schooled my feature into a more neutral mask. I first turned toward the King and bowed my head.

"I am deeply sorry to intrude on your conversation Mister Thorin, and I assure you my queries could wait if you have important matter at hand. I just needed to ask Mister Balin something. "

I was as polite as I could. I didn't call him King for I remembered perfectly he told me not to, but I still couldn't quite call him simply Thorin. Ori had explained to me he wasn't really King for his kingdom was far away and had been taken. Yet he remained their leader and had allowed me to stay. It was enough to deserve my respect, or some of it, at least for now.

He nodded and answered in his deep, gruff voice.

"Speak your queries; we are listening, unless you wish for me and my sister to leave you alone with Balin."

I shook my head no and turned to look at the white bearded dwarf

"I was simply wondering whether you could show me to a meticulous smith. I know there are forges, mines and smiths around but I think everyone will agree I should probably not try and find them myself."

Balin and Dís smirked while Thorin's mouth quirked, slightly before his usual frown was back.

"Why do you need a smith for?' Balin asked as I glanced to Dís.

-Well, you see, I think there could be some improvements in the ward's equipments. Where I come from there is a wide variety of tools surgeons, healers, use in order to work efficiently.

-Do you think such tools are needed?' Dís asked, instantly curious and interested by the topic.

-Some of them might not, but then again it wouldn't hurt to be prepared. It's nothing much really just smaller, precise metallic tools that could be really useful in events such as the one that happened a few weeks ago.' I explained calmly.

-What kind of tools are you thinking of?' I was surprised to hear the King ask.

-Well, first I'd like some very thin, very small and very, very sharp blades. We call them scalpels. They are really useful and allow cutting precise wounds thus diminishing the damages inflicted on the patient.

-Why would you want to cut your patient?' Balin looked surprised.

-Well…' I started before Dís intervened.

-We had the case of someone bleeding in the insides. She cut him open, sew the inside wound and the cut and he's now alive."

Apparently my reputation as a butcher hadn't travelled that far into the halls. I had to add something though for Balin and the King were clearly impressed and it made me uneasy.

"Well, it was nothing short of a miracle that he survived. Trust me on this, many complications could have happened and killed him. I'm actually surprised he survived.

-Well, he survived so take the compliments given freely.' Dís insisted and I rolled my eyes.

-Anyway, a finer blade would have been useful back then. I'd like to make some sort of pliers, if there's a wound with an object inside, stone, wood or the likes, it might prove useful. I'd like to have scissors too and different types of needles, in various shapes and sizes.

-Don't you have similar objects already?' Balin asked Dís who simply shrugged.

-You have to understand; I'd like to have them in different sizes and, if possible, made of copper.

-Copper?' The King repeated questioningly.

-I thought you knew, seeing as many pots and jars are already made of this metal.' I was truly surprised they didn't seem to know.

-What do you mean? We use mainly copper simply because there's a large vein we're currently exploiting.

-Well copper as a natural tendency to prevent the propagation of bacteria…

-Bacteria?" The three of them asked.

Oh dear.

There started a very long discussion that took too much time before it turned back from my medical explanations to a more practical discussion of what exactly I wanted to have made. During that time I discovered that the King was actually quite a competent smith, renowned around for his weapons, mostly swords.

Together with him, Dís and Balin, we went toward a study room where we discussed in more details the types of objects I would need. The rest of my day was spent with them, bent on a table looking at parchments were I tried my best to draw what I needed. The King was surprisingly interested and he soon asked me many questions. Dís helped me a lot, I could explain with more ease to her what I wanted the tools to do and she then translated in more technical terms what the smith should do.

All in all we spent the whole day all together and I soon forgot about the problems that awaited me in the brothers' house.

* * *

><p>When I went back home that night, Ori was alone and Nori had left. When Ori told me this news I felt my knees go weak and I had to quickly sit on the nearest chair. I lifted my hand to my forehead, closing my eyes for a minute. When I glanced back up, Ori was still sitting in front of me, his gaze fixed on the fire in the hearth.<p>

"Ori' I sighed 'Oh Ori I'm so, so sorry. I didn't mean…I was just. I was so upset, so angry, I didn't mean to…' Ori stopped me there.

-Don't. Don't feel guilty for that. Nori has always been like this. He's just as protective as Dori, he just hide it more. Yet he comes and goes when he wants, uncaring of what we feel, of what I feel. ' Ori sounded so bitter it physically hurt me.

-Still. I should have been more polite, more diplomatic.' I insisted softly, lowering my head.

-Actually I think he was more shocked by how close your reaction was to that of our Ma's when she was upset because of Da. Most dwarvish women have strong character, especially those living here. Exile tends to harden people." He said smiling a shy toothy grin.

I smiled back and then we remained silent for awhile before Ori went to grab his notebook and started to ask me questions about my world. It had become quite a tradition, a habit between us, to sit companionably and share our knowledge and thoughts. More often than not Ori would scribble away on his notebook and that made me smile to see him so focused.

It felt natural to see him like this. I enjoyed seeing him like this, he looked so passionate, so absorbed by his notebook. It was impressive to witness that. Ori was usually soft spoken and almost shy, but when he was writing in his notebook, he had such a serious look that you couldn't ignore the fact that he wasn't a little boy.

I smiled softly at this now usual sight.

"You should be a librarian Ori, or a scholar, anything to do with research and dusty tomes really." I finally decided to speak my mind that night.

He froze and I could see his face looked more forlorn. I quickly worried that I'd say something awful to him and I went to apologize when he spoke softly.

"I wish I could, but it's not going to happen."

That surprised me and I couldn't help but ask.

"Why couldn't you?"

Ori seemed to hesitate a bit before he closed his notebook. I could see him furrow his brows slightly and then he answered.

"You see, we have been building these halls for awhile, but we're still having difficulties, monetary difficulties mostly. Even Thorin, who should by right be our King, is forced to work daily in the forges. Fili, his heir, is working there too when he's not training with the guards, as is Kili, his younger brother.

-Is the situation that bad?

-Thorin chose to install our settlement here at first because of the natural caves. We didn't need so many dwarves to carve and dig the mountain. Like this the others could work and try to make some money. Right now there's the problem that we haven't really found anything really precious in the mines. There's silver and copper in quantities but no gold, no precious gems, no mithril, or at least not in sufficient quantities for the gems. We're highly dependent on our trades and partners.

-I see. With a situation so dire, libraries, books and research are not really things one would concentrate on to earn his share.

-Well, it's not really useful for the community in the short time future. Maybe later, when we'll be luckier, then our halls will shine with wealth and massive room would be set up, shelves of carved stone in the walls and rows upon rows of books and rolls.

-I'd like to see that.' I smiled.

-Aye. It is said that Erebor had such libraries in its depth. One day, if we're lucky enough, our kingdom will shine again and any dwarf, man or elf, would want to have the honour to walk our halls, to see our treasures, to catch a glimpse of our majestic rooms where ageless knowledge will be hidden."

I could see the light shine in his eyes and it hurt to see it disappear as soon as reality set back in his mind, shooing his dreams away too easily.

"One day Ori, I'm sure one day those dreams will come true. I'll pray for it myself.' I said in a whisper.

-You're kind Amelia." He answered just as lowly.

We didn't speak about his dream again, though I never forgot the light in his eyes and the smile of wonder on his face at the simple idea of his wish becoming true.

That day, maybe for the first time truly, I realized how deeply hurt the dwarves had been. Maybe they were the only ones who could really understand how it could pain me to have been separated from my home.

Yes.

I could understand their pain just as much as they could understand mine.

I wished then that there was a way for them to get their real home back. I wished then that I too could see this Erebor, for the more I heard of it, the more I pictured it as an Eldorado of some sort. I truly wished one day to see my friends' dreams come true.

But I was just a mere homeless human. There was nothing I could do to help them.

I could merely pray.

* * *

><p>Two days later Dori came back.<p>

We organized an improvised feast at home and many dwarves came to welcome the merchant and his team back. I knew all the dwarves present; Bofur, Bifur and Bombur were among the first to arrive and had helped us set up the table and prepare impossibly huge amounts of food.

Then Danà, Gloin, Gimli and Oin had come, arriving with hands full of bread, cheese and cakes made by Danà. Dwalin was here too and sported a new scar on his left forearm that I wanted to inspect but he gruffly refused, growling at me to step back. Hearing from Bofur I had gutted a difficult patient, he let me have a closer look at his injury though and I quickly cleaned it, all the while glaring at a laughing Bofur.

Of course, if Dwalin was here, so was Balin. And with Balin and Dwalin both at our place, I found myself facing the King with wide eyes as he passed through the threshold. My surprise was bigger though when Dís appeared, followed by her two sons who were happily rolling a huge barrel of wine in front of them.

All in all it was a nice, funny evening spent with people I was starting to grow incredibly fond of. By the end of it, I was so drunk though that I called the King by his name only and felt so ashamed that I started to apologize profusely. It went to the point where a laughing Dori guided me back to my room to sleep it off.

The dwarves' drinking habits were starting to rub on me and I wasn't sure I should appreciate that.

The only real thing I noticed though was that Nori wasn't here. I felt mixed feeling of anger and hurt set in my heart.

He didn't come back until a week later.

During this whole time though, my anger against him for leaving once more wordlessly and my hurt at that same action had grown to quite huge proportions. I was actually so angry that I simply refused to acknowledge his presence. To my utter despair, he didn't even try to talk to me.

Suddenly I realized there was quite an important rift between us. I could barely stand being in the same room as him, for his new kind of silence towards me quite simply hurt way too much. I couldn't bear to witness it.

Slowly but surely we started to effectively and efficiently avoid each other. Dori and Ori, if they were aware of the situation, and they surely were, didn't comment on it.

And thus became the longest and most painful game of hide and seek I had ever played. Surely its length and my pain were due to the fact that both Nori and I were hiding, and none of us thought to seek the other.

Nori was clearly good at it. A true expert.

He would disappear for days on end. Weeks even.

His frequent disappearances seemed to put the three of us in a sour mood. Ori would mop around once again, even though my and Dori's presence would manage to cheer him up a bit. Dori would be especially grumpy during Nori's absence, grumbling under his breath about 'Ungrateful dwarves', 'dishonour', 'despicable hobby', 'shameful' and other such things. I didn't understand and didn't ask.

His absence made me cruelly realize how much time I could share with him before this whole mess happened. Of course I was living with the brothers, but Nori seemed to always be there whenever I needed someone. Even when I didn't, actually.

He had this habit, I had noticed, to remain in the corners of the room, more often than not half hidden in the shadows. When I'd look up and around to find him he'd smirk slightly and wink at me. Those two simple gestures were enough to make me happy, and it strangely always worked. I couldn't explain why.

He would always bring me out of my gloomy mood so easily.

* * *

><p>I remembered then, that one time. It was one morning just after one of my nightmares. During that night, he had held me and listened to me as I had told him how much I missed home and especially some of my aunt's cooking. I told him how great she was at baking and how much I loved the sweet pies she made when we were on holidays.<p>

I had woken quite later than usual and was tired and slightly depressed still when I entered the kitchen. Only Nori was there.

"Hey." I said softly.

There was no point in asking any of the usual questions; 'how are you?' 'did you sleep alright?'. It was meaningless when I had woken everyone with a stupid nightmare that had included my aunt and uncle somehow. Nori, evidently, knew that perfectly. It seemed to have become a habit of him to hold me at night.

How weird did that sound?

Anyway, he remained silent, observing my every move with his attentive grey eyes. I sat next to him, still very tired from the lack of sleep, and let out a long sigh. Nori was simply nibbling at an apple, one of the only fruit he enjoyed eating, and watched me from the corner of his eyes.

I simply helped myself to a bit of cheese and bread, not much, I felt too depressed to be hungry. I was about to dive in when Nori surprised me by gently patting my shoulder, still not uttering a word.

I glanced at him but he was looking straight in front of him, munching on the fruit. He then stood up, noiselessly, and walked calmly to the door.

Around that time I shrugged and looked back down at my plate to find a small, cute looking, apple pie.

"Wha…?"

I gasped and looked up.

Nori was leaning on the wall near the door, his apple between his teeth. He looked so carefree, so roguish in that moment. I could see the playful glint in his eyes and the mirth to have managed to both please and surprise me.

I felt my mouth form a huge, gleeful smile. I was sure my own eyes reflected how truly happy I was because of this simple little pie.

He hummed slightly, bit in his apple, and smiled before winking at me and leaving the room.

* * *

><p>That simple memory still made my heart swell with warmth. But nowadays it would immediately turn back cold. My sour mood transformed every little happy memory with Nori into something very painful to think about.<p>

I hated him for leaving like this. I hated him for putting all those little moments aside because of a small mistake. I felt guilty for being quite so harsh with him, but on the other hand I still couldn't forgive how he had treated both Ori and I.

So I remained silent the few times he crossed my path in the corridors or in the kitchen and living room, and feigned disinterest and indifference.

It hurt.

A lot.

I wasn't so stubborn that I couldn't admit it to myself. I missed him. I missed him terribly. I had no idea what to do to apologize and somehow, I didn't feel like I should apologize. I still didn't believe I had been wrong in my words. I may have been blunt, but not wrong.

We were in an impasse.

I just knew Nori wouldn't come to me and apologize, it didn't fit what I knew of his character. I had no idea how he felt about this dispute and I couldn't really ask Ori or Dori about it. I was already afraid that the three brothers were having a tense relationship right now because of me and my stupid dispute with Nori.

There was no solution that I could see working. Maybe I could have simply talked with him, but the more I waited, the more difficult it seemed to become.

When had it been difficult to talk to Nori?

Why had I let that happen?

I really couldn't stand this situation.

On my part I then started to hide in the healing wards. I suddenly couldn't spend enough time there. Then one evening I decided to simply stay there for a whole night, I lay on one of the beds and fell asleep from exhaustion.

When I woke up the next morning, I saw a small cup of now cold chamomile and it brought tears in my eyes knowing Dori would have bothered looking for me. It didn't stop me though and I started to sleep regularly in the wards until the day were Dís decided she'd had enough of my overzealous attitude.

It had been exactly sixteen days since the last time I had seen Nori, and at the time I had only caught a glimpse of him as he exited the living room when I came in from the kitchen. All in all I had no idea how long this stupid situation had lasted or how long it would last still.

I was silently working in the wards when Dís came to see me.

"You have got to stop this nonsense. What has got into you these past weeks? You've been nothing but moody and gloomy these past few months. Even your new shiny tools didn't cheer you up."

Instinctively I glanced at the small cupboard where I knew my 'shiny tools' as Dís put it, were properly organized and tidied up in a leather satchel. It wasn't true what she said, I remembered being extremely happy at receiving them. The quality of the work done by the dwarves had amazed me, but maybe I hadn't expressed it that much.

I sighed and looked at Dís who continued her rant.

"Seriously, what has happened for you to turn into such a ghost of the girl we all met?

-Nothing happened Dís. I just, I miss home.' I tried to placate her worries with this thought but utterly failed.

-I don't believe you. I'm sure you miss your home, but I'd like to believe you're starting to see our Halls as a home too. Tell me what happened, I might help you solve this problem that's been eating at you for months.

-Dís please, don't. There's truly nothing you can do. It's just. I made a mess of a situation and I can't see an end to it, that's all."

Her eyes narrowed at me and I just looked straight back at her.

"Every situation can be solved.' She said seriously.

-Not true" I replied automatically.

We remained silent for a few minutes and I could feel her eyes following my every move as I readied some plants, intent on preparing some more ointments with them to replenish our stock. I could feel she was about to talk and beat her to it.

"Look Dís, I appreciate your concern, I really do. But there's truly nothing you can do to help me so please, don't insist.

-I worry for you. Danà does too. She told me she hasn't seen you in quite awhile and when she does, you're not yourself. Even Oin has realized something was up. Mahal every dwarf working at the market knows something's wrong with you!' She said in a sudden motherly tone that made my hands slightly shake.

-You really don't have to worry. I'm fine. I just need time to adapt to some things, it's all. I swear if you could help me I'd come and talk to you.

-Would you really?' She snorted slightly doubting my words.

-I swear I would."

I waited some more time before glancing at her with a small smile.

"Look, I really appreciate your concern, but right now I really want to focus on the ointments. Don't mind me, I'll stay here to prepare them and I swear I'll go back home as soon as they're done."

I saw a small smirk on her face and couldn't understand why she suddenly appeared so happy with herself. Dís had been annoyed not a second ago and now she had this strange knowing glint in her eyes that made me shiver uncomfortably. Still she decided to leave me alone in the wards for that evening.

I was enjoying the sudden calm and peacefulness that surrounded me. Listening to the bubbling ingredients I was slowly putting in a small cauldron, I was entirely focused on my task. It helped me keep my mind blank of everything else, it helped me forget for a short moment, the forlorn thoughts that plagued me.

When there was nothing for me to do but wait I started to let my mind wander. Strangely for the first time in awhile I felt glad to be alone for it allowed me to analyze my own mind and feelings.

Nori's absence and the distance between us was quite obviously the cause to my poor mood. There was no denying that and I was certain Dori and Ori knew it too.

I was a forgetful person. I wasn't stubborn, not really, not when it mattered. And Nori had mattered. Nori mattered still. I missed him and his friendly wink and his small smirks. I missed the small fights and banters we'll have, mostly about who'd get to eat the last sausage at breakfast. I missed the simple gestures he'd do to make me feel better, like forcing himself to eat whatever veggie meal I had prepared.

I missed his comforting presence by my side.

I missed him quite simply.

I suddenly wished to see him right here and then, whatever the cost may be.

Little did I know that later that night my wish would come true and our little 'hide and seek' game would end with me being the unhappy winner.

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><p><strong>AN: Huge thanks to the three reviewers :) that's always nice to receive some feedback.**

**I really hope you'll all keep enjoying this story :)**

**So... I wonder what your reactions will be about that chapter. I hope I did manage to surprise you a bit with this little dispute and I hope you enjoyed the chapter overall.**

**Any way, I just wanted to say; I know some of you wonder about Nori (What he's thinking, feeling...) but I don't think I will change the POV. I really only want to follow Amelia's POV. It's really up to you to interpret his actions. (Still, being a nice person, I do offer some hints here and there).**

**About copper: it has been proved (to my knowledge) that copper has indeed natural properties. I know that in some hospitals, it is being used (for example as doorknobs)**

**And now...I don't know when I'll update next (probably at least once before the weekend) I'm quite sick and my mind is a bit fuzzy (I apologize if this chapter and the previous one have more mistakes than usual)**

**BUT next chapter will finally answer to one of the most recurrent question I've been asked :D**


	13. Nori's Secret

**I do not own anything. Everything belongs to JRR Tolkien, except for my OC and the plot.**

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><p>I had been waiting for the preparation I had made to cool down. I was entirely alone in the wards. It had become such a usual occurrence for me to stay here at night that I really didn't pay much attention to what was going on around. The first night I had been quite fidgety, startling at each noise I heard, now I was already used to the muffled sounds that from time to time echoed through the empty halls.<p>

Putting back the dried plants I had in hands in their rightful place I tidied quickly the falling dried leaves before going back to my preparation. It took me two more hours to finish the ointment and put it in a large jar. I'll have to separate it into smaller pot but that could wait.

Remembering the promise I had given Dís, I quickly glanced around, checking everything was at its rightful place, and finally left. I wasn't afraid anymore to walk in the dark paths for I knew them quite well now.

I was absentmindedly walking, thinking about one thing or the other, and it didn't take me long to arrive in front of our house's door. I used my key and turned the doorknob, passing through the threshold while wondering why the knob had felt strangely different. I looked at my hand, walking in, to find it covered with something dark and sticky.

My frown deepened while I pushed the door back close with my feet. The only light in the living room came from the dying fire in the hearth. My eyes were focused on my hand when I stumbled over something that shouldn't be here and fell most ungraciously on the stone floor.

Hitting it quite violently I yelped and cursed loudly, wondering which of the three brothers had had the great idea to leave a large bag in the passage way. Feeling around for that stupid bag, my hands touched once more something sticky and strangely warm.

It took me a few seconds more to feel for something covered in leather.

My tiredness and the late hour were probably to blame for the time it took me to realize what I was grabbing. It was only when I felt a beard beneath my fingers that I finally found out what I was touching. There was a body on the floor.

I blinked.

What was a body doing here?

And then it all clicked in my mind. The sticky substance was obviously blood. My healer training kicked in and my brain started to gear up. I needed light, quickly and probably some help to put the injured patient somewhere else than our floor. At the time though, it didn't occur to my mind who could be lying there, bleeding next to me.

"Help! Anyone help!" I yelled as loudly as I could.

My hands were still on the body, trying to feel for his neck and check for a pulse. It's only about then that I realized who was lying cold and unconscious under my fingers. I could recognize this braided beard easily enough, even in the dark. I didn't need to feel for his hair to confirm it.

"Nori" I whispered and a lump formed in my throat.

He was lying on his side and I had apparently stumbled on his feet. I crawled a bit to get closer to him and patted his back to try and feel for an injury there. Feeling nothing I cautiously pushed him so that he lay in a flat position.

Meanwhile I could hear some noise from the rooms; clearly the two other had been awakened by my scream but were taking their sweet times to come.

"Oy! Move your asses I need you here now!" I shouted emphasizing the last word.

That did it. I heard the doors open in bangs and rushed footsteps.

"Amelia? What is going on?

-It's Nori, he's lying on the floor and bleeding." That spurred them into action.

Before the two of them could crowd me though, I ordered.

"I need light in this room. I have to see where he's hurt."

The two brothers scrambled to light candles and revive the dead fire. In a few minutes the room was as lit as could be and I tried my hardest to keep my face neutral.

There was a reason why surgeons should not operate relatives. Seeing Nori's pale face spattered with crimson blood tore my heart. My fingers froze and my gaze stared at the sight of him, unconscious, bleeding, dying. My mind went blank. Thankfully Ori let out a pained gasp that woke me from my shock induced torpor.

I shook my head and took a long deep breath. Right now I needed to be the healer, not the terrified friend. It took me a few seconds to manage to block thoughts of Nori and concentrate on the factual elements I could see.

The purple tunic and the leather coat were torn and darkened by blood. I slowly and prudently opened the coat and tunic to reveal Nori's undershirt which was rendered crimson by blood. Before doing anything else I turned to Dori and Ori, finding them right behind me and white faced.

"Ori, do you know where my instruments are in the wards?' He nodded, obviously remembering the few times he had come to visit me there and so I kept on 'I need them, run as fast as you can and bring me the entire satchel that contain them."

I had barely finished talking that he was already running in the corridor. I turned to Dori next.

"We'll need to put him somewhere else, but for now I need huge amounts of clean linens to absorb the blood and bandage his chest. I'll need water to clean the wound too, it'd be better to boil it first. You have thyme in the kitchen, right?' He nodded 'Once the water boils, put some in it."

I turned back to Nori, not waiting to see Dori leave to do as I had asked.

I let my eyes linger on his face for a second, he was so pale. I brushed my knuckles on his cheek, internally wincing at how cold he felt under my touch. Bracing myself, I shook my head and pushed all thoughts of him out of my mind.

I reached to his undershirt and slowly tried to open it. When I realized that unlacing the upper part wouldn't be enough I looked around and finally spotted one of Nori's dagger. It was on his side, hidden by his leather coat but as soon as I saw it, I grabbed it. I didn't even take the time to think about why there would be blood on the blade. Cutting the undershirt open wasn't complicated but I needed to be cautious; the wet cloth might stick to his wound and removing it forcefully or quickly might worsen the injury.

I was surprised to realize Nori had apparently attempted to heal himself. Under his shirt, his chest was messily bandaged in what I guessed to be an attempt to slow the bleeding. I bit my lower lip and proceeded to cut the dirty and bloody linens. They did stick to his wound and I swore under my breath. It took me an age to remove them completely.

Once his chest was bare in front of my eyes I gasped. I had never seen such a wound before. The flesh was torn open in no less than three distinct places and blood was steadily flowing. I moved closer to inspect the wound, looking for anything that I'd have to remove. Luckily the injury appeared relatively clean, though I was still worried about the eventual infection that would result from it.

At that moment Ori came back in, panting and struggling to catch his breath. He handed me my satchel and I took it without a thought.

"Go help Dori." I ordered before adding "Be quick about it, I need the linens now."

It didn't take me long to clean the blood away once I had the water, thyme and linens. Then I washed my hands thoroughly before preparing my tools and swiftly starting to sew the wounds shut with the clean strings I had prepared and put in my satchel.

"I'll be needing honey too. I don't want to take any chances."

I said to no one in particular, not paying attention to the brothers, knowing one of them was bound to go grab the pot of honey we stored in the kitchen's cupboard.

After a short while, Nori was patched up and I swiped the remaining blood from his chest, leaving it deathly pale, only marred by the three angry red scars and nasty bruises. I mechanically and thoroughly washed my hands and forearms, using clean linens to dry them.

I then started to probe delicately around his chest, checking to see if his ribs were broken, praying for him not to have any internal damages. I didn't find any broken bones and inhaled deeply, hoping for the best. I quickly checked him for other wounds and aside a small cut on his left hand and a rather long gash on his right biceps, there was nothing I could see.

I took the time to close my eyes and breathe before asking the other two.

"I need help to remove completely his tunic and shirt. Meanwhile, if there's still thyme in the kitchen, bring it."

Dori came forth and together we gently stripped Nori, using slow moves to avoid putting pressure on his wounds and tearing them back open. He was still lying on the dirty floor though, but I needed to stitch his arm before I could clean his back and sides from the blood. Then only we would think of carrying him elsewhere.

Dori went to pour some more water in another clean bowl and brought it to me. He had been foreseeing enough to let some water boil atop the wood stove in the kitchen. I cautiously and thoroughly, with Dori's help, cleaned Nori's upper body before we carried him with Ori's help a few steps further.

Dori was holding him upright effortlessly while I applied honey mixed with thyme on the wound and bandaged his whole chest. It was breaking my heart to see his head dangle on his side, lifelessly. I struggled for a minute to focus once more on my duty. In order not to leave any possibility out, I applied the same treatment on his arm and on his hand.

Dori and Ori then carried him to his bed and I followed. Once he lay in the dimly lit room I turned to the brothers.

"Someone should probably tell the King, and I'll need to gather some ointments and treatments from the ward. I don't think it wise to move him further than here.

-Is he going to be alright?"

It hurt to hear Dori speak in such a small, uncertain and worried voice. It hurt even more not to be able to honestly reassure him completely.

"Right now I can only keep a close watch on him. I'll need to monitor whether he breaks into a fever, whether he's cold and many other things. I can't tell you he's perfectly fine.' Seeing both of them looking so despaired I added quickly 'But, I think we treated his wound quickly enough and they were quite clean. I don't think they'll be infected."

That didn't cheer them as much as I thought it would. I sighed and insisted.

"He's a dwarf. You guys are strong and resilient. If tomorrow he's stable, then I think he'll be fine. I just have to keep a close watch for twenty four hours at least."

They both nodded, eyes on Nori, before Dori spoke.

"I'll go and tell Thorin, do you want me to wake Oin too?

-I don't think he could do more right now, so let him sleep.' I shook my head.

-Do you want me to go look for the ointments you need?" Ori's voice was so small and shaky it hurt me physically to hear it.

I hesitated for a minute. I could probably describe Ori what the jars I needed looked and smelt like, but I really didn't want to take any risk. On the other hand I was reluctant to leave Nori's side even for a minute. I bit my lip and finally nodded.

"Could you also bring me a clean dress from my room? I put them in the trunk."

Ori nodded and Dori didn't even stir at the impropriety it was for me to change in a man's room without being married to said man. Ori was back in the room with a clean dress before I had the time to even do something and I quickly explained in details what ointments I'd need.

They both left me alone in Nori's room and I gingerly sat on the bed next to his pale form once I was wearing clean, unsoiled clothes. I softly brushed his forehead, my fingers skimming over his skin, glad not to feel any fever, but frowning when I realized he did feel unnaturally cold.

I left his side only to go grab some more blankets and took extra care when I gently tucked him in.

Once I was alone in the silent room with nothing else to do but look at Nori, the shock and gravity of the situation finally settled in my mind and I felt tears gather in my eyes.

I hated seeing Nori so weak. Nori was supposed to be the strong presence in my world, the one who'd gather me in his arms and reassure me. I needed reassurance now, I needed him, and seeing him there, unmoving and deathly pale nearly had me in a crying heap on the floor. Oh, how I hated to see him like this. Yet I hated even more thinking about all the complications that could happen in the following hours. I couldn't bear thinking about how it would feel if something terrible were to happen.

I couldn't even remember what the last words I had spoken to him were.

God, were my last words to him the ones we exchanged on that awful morning ages ago?

I then realized that I hadn't spoke with Nori in more than two months, almost three.

What had I been thinking? How could I let that happen? What if I never had the chance to…

I struggled to swallow back my tears and whimper and concentrated once more on Nori. I checked his pulse, feeling it quite faint below my fingertips. Way too faint for my taste. Gingerly I let my fingers slide from his neck on top of his still beautiful beard, then on his cheek, then his braided eyebrows. I startled out of my weird daze when I heard a door bang.

Soon enough Dori came back, the King following close by, and they both entered the room silently. I quickly answered the King's question and repeated that I couldn't know whether Nori would be fine until more time had passed.

I spent the whole following day at Nori's side. Kicking out the visitors, except for Dori, Ori, Oin and Dís, the last two checked him to ensure I hadn't missed anything. I didn't mind, to tell the truth it reassured me somehow to have them agree with what I had done so far.

The sight of his broken body lying on his bed was so disturbing. He didn't look anything like Nori. Gone were the playful smirks and winks, gone was the cheeky glint in his eyes. He was so pale it scared me and the dishevelled state of his hair and, to a certain extent his beard, was oddly perturbing too. It was actually weird to see him without his crazy hairdo and I was surprised by the actual length of his hair.

I spent my day changing the bandages and cleaning the wounds, checking his pulse and temperature, looking after him and worrying. In the mean time, my brain was betraying me, sending me images of what could happen, of how the situation could worsen and how he could simply be taken away from us, from me.

I tried to muzzle my pessimist brain, tried to stay calm and simply drowned all my fears deep down in the recess of my heart. My efforts were for nothing and my worries grew tenfold when Nori broke into a fever. Sweat pearled on his forehead and a slight sheen of sweat covered his chest. Removing his bandage I gasped as I saw the swelled wounds that had obviously become infected.

I panicked.

This time I didn't care whether it was midday or midnight, I asked Ori to go call for Oin or Dís.

"What can we do…" I whispered to myself, going through all the plants I knew in my mind.

My knowledge seemed blurred in my mind and I didn't seem able to concentrate at all. I couldn't express at that moment how glad and relieved I was to see Dís stride in quickly.

"Dís, he's having a fever. What plant can I use?

-Stop fussing and think! You're a healer. You know the answer."

Her blunt and sharp answer felt as if cold water had been thrown in my face. Her eyes were hard as she gazed at me. I took a deep breath. Of course I knew what to do. I looked sternly into Dís sterner face and said in a monotone.

"Snapdragon. If I prepare a poultice with snapdragon flowers, thyme and witch hazel, it should significantly reduce the swelling and prevent the infection to spread.

-Right. And then?

-To treat his fever, I think we should try and force him to drink some infusion of Echinacea and Chrysanthemum."

Dís nodded and suddenly threw me a large satchel that I barely managed to catch before it fell. She then turned away and started to walk back out.

"Next time you simply need a delivery boy, ask Ori will you?"She called to me from the corridor.

I smiled for I knew she wasn't offended, merely annoyed by my fussing around. Gee I was spending too much time around Dori. I immediately started to prepare the infusion and the poultice. As I suspected, the bag Dís had thrown me contained all the plants I'd need.

Applying the poultice was easy enough but I found myself slightly tense when I had to make him drink the tea prepared earlier. I thought about it before gingerly lifting his head and upper body and sliding between him and the wall. I used my own body to make him lean back in a half seated position between my legs.

I felt a bit embarrassed at this weird position but chastised myself mentally, I had to help him in any way I could, regardless of any unease I might have and I wasn't strong enough to lift him with one arm and hold the cup in my other hand without spilling half its content on him.

Gently I brushed away from his feverish face a few strands of hair that had escaped his dishevelled hairdo. I placed the back of his head on my shoulder, maintaining him relatively straight, straight enough for him not to choke when I'll put liquids in his throat. First of all though, I had to try and awake him.

After many words whispered in his ears and with my cool hands on his forehead, I finally felt him stir slightly. His eyes remained closed though and he didn't really wake, for he was still clearly in a feverish daze. Not wishing to wait for him to be entirely conscious I cautiously put the cup against his too pale lips and forced a bit of the infusion in his mouth.

It tore my heart to hear and feel him cough at first. I could feel through his back and in my chest the rumble of each cough and I knew that every cough was putting an added tension on his wounds. He was trembling, obviously in pain, against me and I hated it, for it meant he was suffering and I couldn't bear this thought.

Still I forced him to drink more of the infusion. Slowly.

That night I barely slept and I was grateful to have Dori and Ori with me to sit at Nori's bedside. The two brothers stayed with me often, though they still had to keep on working during the day. I was spending all my time in Nori's room and his two brothers came whenever they could.

I had felt terrible when Ori had confessed he just couldn't stand seeing his brother in such a state. It was early on the second day and Ori and I ended up in a tight hug. It was a hard and terrible time for the three of us. Even the ever strong Dori seemed utterly defeated and I could see in his slumped shoulders that he somehow felt responsible for Nori's situation though I couldn't fathom why.

The second day, late in the evening and after many repeats of the same actions, his fever finally broke. I remember how relief rushed through me, making my legs slightly shaky. If the fever was down, then it meant Nori was getting better.

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><p>In the early afternoon of the fourth day, I was starting to doze when Nori let out a moan and started to stir. It woke me up immediately and I jumped to my feet, rushing to his side and kneeling beside the bed. This time, it appeared he was about to regain consciousness for good.<p>

"Nori!" I let out in a whisper.

I felt immensely glad to see his eyes open. It took him a few blinks and a long minute to focus his eyes on me. He was clearly disorientated and I softly spoke to reassure him. My hands were on his shoulder, making sure he wouldn't try and sit up; men I had found, and especially dwarves, could be extremely stubborn and stupid when it came to their own injuries.

"Don't move. You're in your room. I found you in the living room and I patched you up. You have to lay still."

He nodded weakly and opened his mouth to speak yet he didn't manage to utter a word.

"Hang on" I told him before quickly grabbing some fresh water Ori had brought me earlier.

"Here" I cautiously helped him drink, lifting his head slightly.

I couldn't help but wince when he choked a bit and coughed, obviously in pain. Still he needed to hydrate himself and now he was awake I would have to be careful about his intake of food too. It took us some time, but he finally managed to drink some much needed water. I wanted nothing more than to let him sleep and recover. Right now though, I needed to ask him several things.

"Nori, listen, I need you to answer some questions. Does it hurt anywhere besides your torso?

-No' He croaked, but then added 'My head.

-Headache then."

I slowly probed his chest, looking at his reactions. At the end I was glad to find out he was apparently unhurt except for the three scars he now sported on his muscled chest and arm as well as a few bruised ribs. His other bruises were already starting to fade a bit thanks to Oin's almost magical ointment.

"I'll go and prepare some more infusion for you to drink. I'll tell Dori and Ori you're awake. Don't move! I'm serious!"

He nodded, clearly too weak to do anything else and I could see he was already making an effort to just move his head.

It was great bringing news of Nori's awakening to his brothers. Their gloomy and sorrowful looks disappeared quickly and they rushed to his side, hopefully listening to my orders not to move or crowd the patient.

I took some time to prepare Nori's infusion; I wanted to leave the three brothers alone for awhile, I believed they needed it. I put some hot water in a bowl where I had previously mixed Echinacea and chamomile and slowly waited for the plants to infuse. Meanwhile I prepared some more water in a large cauldron and put it to boil. Once the infusion was ready I poured the tinted water in another cup and lathered it with honey before bringing it to Nori.

I stopped at the door when I saw the three brothers together. I didn't think I'd ever see Nori being in the position of the weakened and pampered one; usually Ori, or myself, was cuddled and taken care of by the other two. Here Nori was lying on the bed, still deathly pale while Ori was kneeling next to him, holding his right hand in his and Dori had one of his hands gently brushing Nori's forehead.

At that moment I sorely missed my old camera. I took in the sight and put it in some corner of my mind, wishing never to forget it, and then I cleared my throat softly.

They all glanced at me and I gave them my sweetest genuine smile.

"Hey there, I've got something for you to drink."

It took him some time, but with Dori's help we managed to have Nori in a half seated position thanks to a huge amount of cushions and pillows. After awhile, once he had drunk all the infusion, I shooed the two brothers out.

"Why can't we stay?' Ori whined.

-Because I say so, I'm his healer right now, not your ward. He needs sleep, lots of it. Out, both of you." I sternly said, though I smiled at Ori.

When I came back to Nori's side, I cautiously started to remove his bandage when I heard him whisper.

"Tyrant"

I glanced at his face, seeing the faded, yet still present, amused glint in his eyes. I smiled broadly at him and shrugged. I told him what I was doing and what I had observed of his wounds the days before.

After having checked his injury and being relatively happy with its state of healing, I went back to the kitchen and gathered the boiled water. Dori had already put it in one copper bowl, letting it cool down.

Coming back in the room, I could see that Nori hadn't moved an inch, proving how tired and weak he really was. I had no doubt that if he could, he would have already been moving around. I put the bowl of water on his bedside table and took a clean cloth. I could feel Nori's eyes on me when I put the cloth in the water and then wringed it above the bowl.

Then, without looking at his face, I gingerly started to clean his wound. It felt strangely different to do that now that he was awake but I guessed it was just the fact that he was observing me. It took me some time to clean away the rests of poultice and sweat from his chest and arms and during that whole time I didn't glance at him. When I did though, I couldn't help but smile.

It amused me greatly to see his pale cheeks had taken a rosy tinge and I couldn't resist playfully teasing him. I was glad to see some colours on him and didn't hesitate to tell him so.

Nori glanced at me and pouted, before pointedly looking away, making me softly chuckle.

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><p>Even though his wounds were healing well, Nori remained weak and bedridden. And I remained at his side during the whole time, taking care of him and spoon feeding him his broth the first few days wasn't easy. Really, it wasn't.<p>

"Why can't I have real food.' Nori groaned while Dori helped him into the same half seated position than earlier.

-Because, ' I answered with a smile. 'You haven't eaten in days and you're weak. Your stomach wouldn't hold anything else.

-I'm not…' I winced slightly when he struggled to get the words out, clearly in pain. '…weak.

-Amelia, I'll leave you to it.' Dori told me then.' Good luck."

I smiled at him when he left. I already knew that dwarves made terrible patient, so I couldn't hold it against Dori not to want to take care of one, even if it was his brother. I didn't mind so I sat on the bed, next to Nori and facing him, a bowl of broth on my knees.

"You are not weak. I know. But right now you're injured. Please Nori, let me help you get better." I softly told him.

I saw him hesitate, I could read his face easily right now; he was too tired to school his feature as he usually did. After some minutes he finally relented and slowly I fed him his broth. It was the only time he complained about me feeding him and I was honestly surprised. I expected him to fight me about everything.

Other than that I spent my entire days with him and his brothers came regularly too. We talked with him when he was awake, and I usually rested when he did. After a few days, I decided to massage his limbs in order to help blood circulate and to make sure the muscles were used even during his convalescence.

"What…what are you doing?' He sputtered at first.

-Massages.' I simply answered.

-Why do you do that?' He complained his cheeks once more adorning a rosy colour.

-Because I know it's good for your health.

-I'm not a child.

-It'd be greatly frightening, unsettling and even sickening to see a child with such wounds.' I replied while carefully massaging his legs. 'Stop complaining and let me do my job.

-You…you!

-I…what?" I absentmindedly asked while stopping my work.

I then simply moved on to cautiously wetting the honey bandages I had put back in place earlier and removing them. Then I started to gingerly probe at the sides of his injury.

I glanced at him as he hadn't answered and I had barely the time to swallow back a chuckle that would have angered him. Nori was currently pouting, looking away from me, staring at the wall and obviously annoyed.

I took some clean linen and softly brushed away the remnants of honey on his wounds. I saw him shiver but he didn't utter a sound. After having cleaned his wound, I decided to wait a bit before applying more honey. Using another clean cloth, I slowly washed Nori's upper body.

I couldn't help but smirk when I saw that he had closed his eyes and clenched both his fists and jaw. He was completely tense.

Was he really that angry at being unable to wash himself? Was it so shameful? Silly men…

* * *

><p>At first Nori was quite evidently ashamed each time I had to help him but after a few days of such treatments he became slightly less embarrassed though he quickly turned grumpy. All in all his grouchy face amused me greatly and when I told him so, he made extra efforts to appear cheerful.<p>

Stubborn dwarf.

He went out of his way to try and annoy me. The silly man didn't realize that his being in better health was good news enough for me to forget about his quirks…for now at least.

It took him two weeks to recover enough to be able to go out of his room and walk around. He had lost a lot of blood and I hadn't wanted to take any risks, forcing him to stay in bed for a whole week and only allowing short walking time during the second.

And it took me Nori saying I was worse than Dori to realize I might have been overreacting.

I didn't pay attention to it at the time, and I'm not sure Nori did, but all the pent up anger and hurt I had felt during months had simply vanished from my mind the night I had found him bathing in his own blood. Apparently that I took care of him had pushed away the remnants of his own anger.

It sounded so cliché to say his injuries had made me forget about our quarrel, yet it was the truth. I hadn't suddenly realized I cared for him or anything of the sort; I had known that for weeks, months even.

No. His injuries had simply been a cruel reminder that life around was dangerous and that it was stupid to waste time quarrelling over petty things.

Just like that, without a word, we put aside our dispute and forgot about it.

Another important thing that happened during Nori's recovery was that I finally found out what it was exactly he did for a job.

I was simply there when Dori, the King and Gloin came to talk with Nori about it. When I learned about his so called job, I really wasn't impressed, that's for sure.

* * *

><p>The three dwarves had come in while I was finishing putting back Nori's bandages, three days after he awoke. Quite unsurprisingly, the King spoke first after greetings were quickly exchanged.<p>

"What have you done this time?" He simply asked.

I remember looking at them questioningly but no one bothered noticing my presence. It took some time and finally a direct order from the King for Nori to speak.

"I didn't do anything. I was simply coming back and got ambushed.

-Ambushed? Who ambushed you? Why?

-Well…men. Not too far from the mountains' path, two days after I left Lunetown.

-An ambush you say. Why did they plan to attack you?" The King insisted.

I saw Nori avoid everyone's eyes and I could easily recognize the stubborn look on his face. Looking back at the other dwarves I noticed they were growing quite angry. An argument would not be good for Nori's recovery so I decided to intervene. I cleared my throat, making them all glance at me, and put my hand on Nori's before saying.

"Nori, if I was the one lying here, refusing to speak, you'd be throwing the room's furniture at me already.' I gently chastised 'I have the feeling those three already have a hunch as to what happened, why not tell them?"

He looked at me and seemed to hesitate. I was simply speaking the truth. Nori would be quite angered if I remained silent and refused to tell him who might have hurt me.

He sighed deeply before lowering his gaze to his lap.

"I had stolen a few…barely precious items from them a moon or so ago."

I blinked while the three other dwarves groaned and growled.

"You're a thief?' I asked genuinely surprised 'But you said you were in trades…oh! Oooh. Cheeky dwarf." I couldn't help but smirk, even though it really wasn't the sort of reaction that was expected in such a situation.

To tell the truth I simply didn't care at all as to what Nori did, as long as he came back relatively unharmed and didn't cause troubles for me or our friends. Well, sure, I clearly didn't agree with his choice of career and I strongly believed thieves should be put in jail. But at the moment my mind was simply clouded by my relief of seeing him in better health. Seeing him able to talk and be grumpy was much more important to me than his activities.

A thief was a thief and I didn't think there was a good excuse for being one. But how could I be angry, disdainful or annoyed at Nori for that? After all…it was Nori. The Nori who was smirking and winking at me, trying to make me cheerier, he was my friend, one of the closest I had here. He was the one to hold me when I had nightmare and the one to sooth me when I was sad or terrified. How could I hold it against him?

How could I even picture him as a thief?

In my mind I just couldn't put together the thought of Nori and the image I had of thieves. It just didn't coincide. I knew objectively that he was one, hell he said it himself, but something in my mind was whispering it couldn't be that simple. I didn't know if that little voice was just me wishing that this man I cared deeply for wasn't a criminal, or if it was a genuine and realistic intuition.

Now though I realized I could have guessed this information on my own awhile ago. It wasn't as if he was going out of his way to hide it. Memories of events started to click into places in my mind and I turned to Nori, completely forgetting about the others being here.

"Nori…remember that comb? The wooden one in that first town we went to?

-What about it?' He purposely avoided my gaze.

-Well?" I knew he had perfectly understood what I wanted to ask him.

He didn't answer, simply shrugged. I guessed he would never tell me, keeping me wondering. That sounded cheeky enough for him. There was no way I'll force the answer out of him and it made me wonder whether I really cared at all about it or not. I'll have to ponder on that later.

Right now though the other three dwarves wanted answers and they clearly were in no mind to wait.

"Did you kill the men?' Gloin asked and I jolted slightly, I hadn't even thought to ask such a thing.

-No, not all of them.

-What caused your wound?' I asked softly, squeezing his hand unconsciously.

-Spiked mace.' Nori whispered.

-How did you get away?' The King questioned him, ignoring me.

-Killed one, injured the two others."

More groans and sighs resonated in the room. I wasn't sure how to react anymore so I remained silent and unmoving. I knew already that these men viewed killing in an entirely different way that I did and I knew Nori had no qualms in killing someone who had wronged him. I guessed ambushing him was close enough to wronging him. Still their reaction was quite new to me and I had truly no idea of what to think about this whole mess. From what I could gather, they were more upset about the fact that Nori hadn't killed them all. Such a feeling was quite foreign to me. Though, if I had to choose, I'd prefer to see all his enemies dead and Nori safe and sound instead of the contrary.

Still, was it really so important right now to know whether Nori had butchered a group of men or not?

During this whole time, I hadn't realized that my hand was still on Nori's. I didn't know if anyone had noticed it, for no one commented on that fact and Nori didn't move away either. None of us paid any attention to those details.

"Nori, I swear one day you're going to get killed.' Dori said, shaking his head forlornly.

-I'm more concerned at seeing men arrives with weapons drawn to kick us out of this place.' The King snapped, explaining somehow why he was interested in the men's health.

-Lad, you have got to stop. It's really a shameful hobby you've found for yourself.' Gloin added in a sigh.

-It certainly has to stop Nori. You can't get yourself killed, or risk everyone's safety just for…for nothing. Why do you do that? For a few useless items, trinkets you then struggle to sell in some miserable alleys in men's towns?' The King's voice was as stern as ever when he spat those words.

-Nori, why don't you go back in the forges? You were so talented. Mother always said she loved the beads you created, they sold very well too. She said you had the most precise and meticulous hands she'd ever seen." Dori insisted.

I remained a silent witness, listening to the three dwarves who attempted to reason with Nori. Nori on his part hadn't said a word and seemed to have no reaction whatsoever. I chose to observe him a bit more closely because I didn't believe he wouldn't feel anything about all those talks. The three dwarves kept on ranting, not really paying attention to Nori's lack of reaction.

I for my part could now clearly see his shoulders tensing and anger brewing in the depths of Nori's eyes. Anger was not good for him. Anger would tire him and possibly undo all the progress he'd made in his recovery. I took the decision to put a stop to this interrogation, not caring about who was speaking at the moment.

"Alright everyone, time's up. Please gentlemen, leave my patient alone. You can come back some other day."

Wow, I hadn't expected such glares to be sent my way. They had all turned silent in a second too. Man, I didn't know I could have such an effect on three grown men.

"We'll stay here as long as this matter isn't solved.' The King growled at me.

-No you won't." I insisted calmly.

I faced the King's angry glare with my own steady gaze. I wouldn't budge. I was the healer here. I knew better than them what should be done and had only my patient's interest to care for.

"You dare order me around?

-I'm not ordering you around. I'm telling you to leave now. With all due respect sir, you might be my King, but I'm the healer here. And it is as a healer taking care of her patient that I respectfully tell you to go. Unless of course you wish to interrogate him further and leave him so weak that his recovery would take twice as long."

I quirked an eyebrow at him, patiently waiting for him to realize I was right and not simply challenging his authority for fun.

He took a deep breath and stared at me his frown deeper than usual, appraising me, before giving a quick nod and turning away, just like that. Gloin followed directly after him. Dori though took some more time. He looked at his younger brother, looking clearly sad and reproving. He sighed deeply and shook his head, muttering ' Ma would be so disappointed.'

I felt Nori tense next to me, but he didn't say anything and didn't even watch his brother leaving the room. I was soon alone with Nori again. Turning towards him, I saw him staring at me and I shrugged.

"Lie down please. I was serious about your recovery. You need to relax.

-I'm not that weak.' His anger was apparently using me as an outlet.

-I know that.' I replied patiently while putting some drops of lavender oil on my finger tips. 'Lie down now or I'll make you."

He gave me a doubtful look but obeyed nonetheless, deeply sighing when his head fell on the pillow. I approached him and gingerly put my fingers against his temples. His eyes snapped open and he stared at me, a strange look in his eyes.

"I'm going to smell like a woman.' He complained weakly.

-Yep. That'd be a nice change from the blood and gore." I smirked.

He rolled his eyes and hissed when he tried to shift. Seeing Nori like this was really not something I enjoyed at all.

I simply started to massage his temples silently and smiled slightly when his eyes fluttered closed and he started to finally relax. After awhile though I couldn't resist and spoke.

"So you're a thief then."

His right eye half opened and he hummed.

"Dare I ask why you decided to do something apparently not many dwarves do?

-How do you know no other dwarves are thief?' he simply countered.

-Gloin's words, and the others' reaction.' I automatically replied 'So, why giving up something you were quite good at for another job which is obviously life-threatening and not really honourable?"

He sighed and closed his eyes back again. I didn't insist. Slowly I removed my hands from his temples and readied myself to leave him alone, he needed to relax quietly. I squeezed his hand lightly before softly whispering.

"Try and relax now. I mean it. You need some sleep."

He remained silent though I felt him shiver ever so slightly and I frowned. I automatically grabbed another blanket that I put on his legs. All the while he remained unmoving, eyes closed and I thought he was fast asleep. I watched him for several seconds before turning back and heading for the door. I was almost there when he spoke, startling me.

"I'm looking for some…things. Stealing other stuffs is just a way to … cover my expenses."

I turned back and leaned on the door for a minute before walking back to him. I tilted my head slightly and asked in a soft voice.

"What are you looking for?"

He didn't answer and didn't stop me this time when I left. Still, I had the feeling he had just told me something quite important.

I left him alone, knowing I would not ask him this question again. At least not for some time.

* * *

><p><strong>AN: Thanks to those of you who reviewed last chapter! I was really happy to read how you had felt about it ^^ Thanks to the four guests, I'm sorry I can't answer to you personally, but it really was great to read each of your reviews! Thank you all for the support!**

**So….I hope you liked this chapter. I don't know how many time I edited it. Now, at least Amelia knows about Nori being a thief :)**** … if nothing else.**

**I really hope you enjoyed it, and that it wasn't too predictable or boring. I know it was probably a bit cheesy, but I couldn't help it… sorry 'bout that. **

**I've had some problem with the doc manager too, so I hope the formatting of this chapter didn't come out too weird… if it did, first I'm sorry, and I'll try to remove and upload it again.**

**I'll try and update the next chapter before the end of the weekend. **

**Thanks again so much for your support! I can't tell you how much it's motivating me to read each of your reviews :)****  
><strong>


	14. A peaceful day in Thorin's Halls

**Everything belongs to JRR Tolkien except for my OC and the plot.**

* * *

><p>Like I had thought, Nori and I didn't speak about this little exchange we had. As soon as he was feeling well enough to stand and walk, he just continued his life as if nothing had happened at all and his brother behaved similarly. After several weeks, life was back to normal. Well as normal as life could be in Thorin's Halls.<p>

At the moment I was struggling in the healing wards, trying to bandage a dwarf, who was yelling and shouting at another black haired one. The second dwarf, who was currently being treated by Oin, was yelling back just as loudly. I couldn't understand what they were saying but my ears were starting to ring from the sheer volume two dwarves could achieve when they put their heart and will in trying to obtain an unordinary level of sounds.

It was seriously starting to grate on my own nerves, while I started to envy Oin for being deaf, though now that I thought about it, maybe that's how he became deaf in the first place. I wasn't paying much attention to the two dwarves, attempting to concentrate on applying a bandage correctly to someone who clearly didn't care whether he was being bandaged or not wasn't easy.

I wondered how Dís would react in such instance. The woman was hard headed and probably more stubborn than those two dwarves put together. It probably was something running in the blood of that family, though I didn't know much of the two young brothers. Would Dís behave like Oin or would she say something? If she said anything, what would it be? How would she say it?

Remembering how she had kicked away partying dwarves after the mine's collapsing, I couldn't believe she would let herself be bullied by two angry dwarves.

"Please, could you stop moving for a minute?" I tried to no avail.

Well, I wasn't even sure these men had heard me. It wasn't as if I would yell at injured patients anyway. I sighed and focused on my work, attempting to finish it quickly and be done with it.

I was sitting on the bed next to the dwarf. My balance was precarious as the dwarf was almost bouncing on the bed in his fury. My jars of ointment were set up just next to me and I had a bowl with water in between my two knees, it wasn't so easy to keep it stable while that bloody dwarf gesticulated in every directions. I just wanted to finish healing him and go to the market, maybe go greet Bifur before going to buy some food for this night's dinner.

I was almost done with the bandage when the dwarf made a wide move with his arms, knocking me of balance. I yelped and fell on the floor, one of my hands still holding on one side of the linen I was using to bandage the stupid dwarf. The jars with ointments rolled on the floor, thankfully not breaking, while the bowl with bloodied water fell on me.

I was now on the floor, astounded, and wet with dirty water dripping from the front of my dress. Looking up I saw the dwarf's bandage was completely undone and I had to restart from scratch.

The bloody dunderhead was still yelling at the other.

Looking around I saw Oin looking at me with wide eyes while the other two kept on yelling.

Something snapped in my head.

I was usually a peaceful and calm person, I strongly believed in diplomacy and I really didn't think that violence should ever be used to solve a problem. What was the point in yelling anyway when there surely was a peaceful solution to any situation?

I admit it now.

I was wrong.

I jumped back on my feet, fist clenched on my hips and I took a deep breath, inhaling as much air as I could. Oin flinched, obviously understanding what I was about to do.

"Oy! Would you just shut up you bloody idiots!"

My voice rang above the chaos of the two dwarves and surprised them enough to make them stop yelling at each other. I saw them blink before they both looked at me in surprise.

"Look what you did! Have you no respect whatsoever for the place you're in? You're in a healing ward, not a tavern. We don't do brawls and yelling matches here. So now you'll shut it, stop moving and you'll let yourself be treated. Once you're out of here I don't care what you do to each other but here and now I don't even want to hear you breathe! Understood?"

I was looking at each of them in turn, waiting for any sign they had understood me. Finally they both nodded and remained silent.

I harrumphed and went back to bandage the dwarf's chest. He didn't move anymore and I was done in mere minutes.

"Here. Now go out and back to your place. I want you to stay in bed for two days.

"Two days? For this scratch? Surely milady…

"No. Two days for your head to cool down and for you to think about how you should behave in a healing ward. No out!"

I heard the second dwarf chuckle but he didn't do it any longer when he saw the glare I sent his way. Oin was smiling contentedly and ordered the second dwarf to stay in bed for two days too.

Once it was just the both of us, he turned to me while I was cleaning the mess made by the other two.

"Amelia I should say it's nice to find out that you have a voice too."

I looked at him, astounded, and he simply went to tidy up the cabinets of jars.

"What are you saying Master Oin, of course I have a voice.

"Oh, I knew that dear. It's just kind of you to let us hear it from time to time."

I truly didn't know how to take that so I chose not to speak about it anymore. I was still thinking about his words though; did he mean to say I should speak up more often? Sure it appeared that dwarves had no issue in letting their feelings be known loudly, but I wasn't sure I could do it too.

It wasn't that I was astonishingly shy. I just wasn't used to yell at people and I didn't think it was such a bad thing either. It had already been difficult for me to simply speak my mind in front of the King, and it wasn't really me who spoke back then, it was the healer on duty. I idly wondered whether I was developing some personality disorder; I was starting to speak up more when I was performing my duties, but it still proved difficult to voice my thoughts and opinions to others when it wasn't related to work.

Still, it was true that people around tended to find it natural to yell at each other. Even now I could remember Danà's words about that time I had thrown a glass of water at Bofur's face.

She had been right. Bofur had only seemed to tease me more after that. I had thought for some time that the dwarf had some mental issues but he was just being a dwarf. They were merry and cheeky, loved to laugh and tease the others and enjoyed more than anything else to be loud and messy.

Oin's voice broke through my thoughts and I looked up to see him already cleaning the mess done by the two dwarves.

"You can directly go home Amelia. I don't think we'll have more trouble today."

I simply nodded, eyeing my dress with obvious disgust. I wanted nothing more than to go and take a hot bath right now. I'll have to stop by the apartment though to take some clean clothes to wear. I'll have to clean my bra too seeing as how the top of my chest was dripping wet. I groaned. I hated the cold feeling that was sipping slowly from my chest to my stomach. The cloth was sticking to my skin too; I shuddered in disgust and quickly left the wards, hurrying back to my room.

Thankfully it didn't take me long to jog in the corridors and none of the three brothers were there. I quickly went into my room and grabbed a clean dress, a towel, soap…

My hands froze as it hovered over the wooden comb Nori had given me. Had he stolen this comb? Did it matter? I couldn't say I agreed with his choices but the comb had been a nice present. I didn't want to give it back or hide it somewhere just because Nori might have stolen it. I bit my lower lip, clearly unsure of what to do. I couldn't decide what to really think about Nori's activities. I was torn.

After awhile I guiltily took the comb and added it on the pile of items I'll take with me to the baths.

I felt a bit guilty, using something that might have been stolen. But on the other hand I couldn't find it in myself to see Nori in another light. I cared too much about him, I had been too upset when we quarrelled and I simply couldn't think about losing him over something like this. Nori was a thief. Well I'll have to adjust to that. Anyway it seemed that even his brother's opinion didn't matter, so I couldn't believe my opinion would.

I finished to grab my things and quickly strode in the direction of the public baths. I hoped water had been heated recently; usually they heated it twice a day in the women's baths. If I was lucky, it'd been heated in the past hour or so and the water would be perfectly warm.

When I came in though I quickly understood that I hadn't been lucky at all. The air in the room was too cold for the heater to have worked recently enough. Grumbling, I resigned myself to take a cold bath.

This day just couldn't get any better.

I quickly stripped and eyed my bra sceptically, it had seen better days. It was getting overused; it had already been an old one when I arrived here and wearing it almost every day since hadn't helped.

I couldn't see myself not using one though. I knew that Dís and Danà didn't use such things; I believed they used bindings of sorts but I couldn't get it in my head to roll myself in bandages. Maybe I could go and ask the seamstresses if they could somehow replicate it.

I shivered when I stepped in the cold mountain water and I swore loudly. Nope, couldn't get used to that either.

My bath was quick and to the point. I was particularly meticulous when washing my hair, I always was very cautious when handling my braid. I didn't know what would happen if I lost one of the beads; maybe it'd be offending? I should ask Dori about that. I played with it between my fingers. Every time I saw or felt this braid, it made a warm feeling grow in my heart. I was glad Dori and Balin had accepted me as their ward. Having this braid here always seemed to cheer me up.

Quickly stepping out of the frigid water, I was soon dressing back in a clean purple dress that Danà had described as typical of dwarvish fashion. The neckline was round and stopped just high enough to cover the breasts completely. The waist and bust was tightly fitted and then from my hips to my feet the dress fell in an ample skirt. The sleeves were puffed from the shoulder to the elbows and tight around the forearm. Dwarvish women, Danà had explained, worked hard every day and didn't want their sleeves to hinder their movements.

I was soon ready to go back to the apartment and I quickly put my clean, but wet, bra hidden on top of the pile of clothes, medieval-like underwear, towels and other items I carried.

I was glad not to meet any soul in the corridors, but my luck just had to stop when I crossed the threshold of our house.

I could already hear some known voices coming from the kitchen. Though they were friends, I didn't want them to see my dirty clothes. I took a deep breath and readjusted my hold on the pile I carried before rushing to quickly stride to my room. I almost collided with Bombur though when he was exiting the kitchen.

"Hello Miss Amelia."

"Hi Bombur, just give me a minute will you."

I muttered before almost running to my room. From the corner of my eyes I had seen that Bofur was here too, as were the three brothers. I quickly threw my dirty clothes in a basket at the foot of my bed and put the other items back in their place. I was about to go out of my room when I heard two new voices coming from the kitchen.

I knew them but couldn't quite place them. I shrugged, it didn't matter much who was there, for I would be nice and polite with anyone. I had yet to meet a dwarf I hated or disliked completely. Sure some of them freaked me out, intimidated me to no end or were just plain weird. But all in all they were a nice bunch, with admittedly no manners, but lots of honour and pride that compensated for their bluntness.

When I pushed the door and entered the kitchen though, I froze and all my nice sentiments went out of the proverbial window.

There, in the middle of the room, those bloody dwarves were studying my bra. Yes studying.

My eyes widened.

My other sense just stopped working.

I remembered the two dwarves. They were Dís' sons and heirs to the throne. Even though I remembered their faces and the time they had saved me from the maze of corridors, I wasn't certain about their names. Pili? Lili? It was something Li. Well, whatever their names, right now I didn't care.

The damn idiot, the younger brother, was holding and tugging on my bra in front of the others.

He was standing in a middle of a circle that consisted of him, his blond brother, Bofur, Bombur, who was apparently back and Ori. Dori and Nori were still sitting at the table, Dori drinking tea peacefully and Nori preparing his pipe.

My ears decided that now was a good time to start communicating with my brain again.

"Is it a slingshot?' Something Li said.

"It doesn't look like it'd be efficient, nor does it appear precise.' Ori frowned.

"Maybe it's a kind of hat?' Bofur added.

"Na… it has two sides. And it's too thin.' The blond brother pointed out.

"I wonder what you can put in that. It's way too small to be a kind of bag.' Something Li analyzed and I saw red.

"It's too big to be a pouch and it doesn't close anyway…"

My wits came back to me in a rush. I bolted and pushed the men away, making a beeline for the dark haired dwarf who appeared shocked by my sudden rush.

"Oy, Miss Amelia, how are you?' He asked me.

"Give. Me. That. Now." I enunciated.

I was entirely stunned to see a sly smirk grew on his face. He wouldn't dare.

"Now, now, Miss Amelia, it's not a way to talk to a prince."

"Prince or not I'll whack your stubborn head if you don't hand me that immediately.' I snapped while a blush crept on my cheeks.

I tried to grab the garment but he dodged my hands absentmindedly.

"Na…I don't think so." He smiled widely and cheekily.

"Kili, you should give it back.' The blond dwarf advised his brother.

"I just want to know what it is!' Kili answered in a shrug while he still avoided my hands easily.

"Give it back!" I ordered but it just made him smile more.

The other dwarves started to chuckle when Kili decided to dash away from me, jumping on the table and dangling my bra in front of me, just to remove it quickly from my sight when I attempted to catch it.

I couldn't win against his reflexes, he was way faster than me and I was starting to be so embarrassed that my movements were becoming uncontrolled. My head was probably as red as it could humanly be possible to be.

"Give it back!"

"Come on, you can catch it! Give it a try!" He joked while the other cheered.

I glanced toward Dori and Nori at that moment. Dori was starting to frown and he looked at me questioningly. I quickly glanced at Nori who was observing me attentively. At the precise moment when I was about to talk, Kili shook my bra just in front of me and I once more tried to catch it to no avail.

To my utter shame, a few tears started to well up in my eyes.

I saw that Dori was about to stand when suddenly Kili wasn't on his feet at the top of the table anymore.

He had apparently stumbled on a plate that I was certain hadn't been there a second before. I dashed to try and grab Kili before he ran away but he was still quicker than me and in a second he had bolted to the door. Still smiling he went to shake my bra in front of me again when we all froze. In his hand was a handkerchief.

"Eh?"

Where was my bra? Everyone stopped to laugh and Kili whined.

"Oy, Nori you're no fun!"

My head snapped to the side as I looked at Nori who simply shrugged. I caught his eyes and he gestured for me to come and take my bra back. In the meantime Dori was already chastising the younger dwarf.

"Kili, you should know when to stop your jokes. Amelia clearly didn't appreciate your dubious humour."

"But I didn't mean anything by it master Dori."

"Still" Dori admonished him.

I didn't pay attention to them while Nori handed me the piece of underwear.

"Thanks Nori." I whispered.

He simply smirked at me and sent me a wink which quickly made me smile softly again.

"I just wanted to know what it was! I found it on the floor…'Kili was still whining.

"Lady Amelia' The blond asked 'Can't you tell us what it is?"

"Aye lass, what is it?"

"Yes Amelia, what do you use that for?"

They were all staring at me, waiting patiently for me to tell them. Ori even had taken his notebook out and was ready to write everything I'd say. I was hesitating. Surely my embarrassment would be nothing compared to theirs, and besides it couldn't get worse for me.

"It's my bra' I muttered.

"What's a bra?"

"It's what we use instead of bindings in my world.' I groaned.

"Instead of binding what?" Kili asked.

They were all waiting for me to explain. All those grown men were paying extra attention to my every word. I simply quirked an eyebrow, wondering which one would find out first. Surprisingly, it appeared that Nori was the first one to make the connection. I heard him suddenly choke on the smoke of his pipe and struggle to find his breath again.

I couldn't stop myself, I had to glance at him.

Well, he was probably as red as I had been earlier on. He had let his pipe fall on the table and was looking at me while coughing loudly. The sight and the knowledge he knew what I had meant made me smirk.

I was surprised to see his eyes glint with amusement after I had smirked at him, though something in the depth of those grey irises promised retribution for the little teasing I was doing.

"I don't get it.' Kili frowned.

"Ask your mother, she'll explain." I retorted automatically.

At that Nori coughed some more, though this time I just knew he was trying to dissimulate his laugh. Oh yes I could picture quite well how Dís would answer. That would teach him to play with my belongings.

I wondered where this sneaky streak came from. I had never been cheeky. On the contrary I had always been rather introverted and though I laughed as loudly as everyone, I just couldn't find it in myself to laugh with people or in front of them. Teasing others in a friendly way was nothing but a notion I had heard of but never truly experienced myself.

Since I had arrived here though, I realized that I was slowly beginning to change. It felt oddly liberating to be able to laugh with others. In the end I didn't mind the embarrassment if it meant I would manage to tease others and laugh with them later. I could see they didn't do it in a mean way either, which helped me greatly in accepting the embarrassment.

Yes, I was definitely learning to enjoy life here thanks to those blunt and slightly annoying dwarves, who couldn't help but laugh almost all the time.

I looked around when I heard a short gasp.

Yep, from the red of his cheeks to the way he was biting hard on his lips to avoid laughing aloud, I could most certainly tell that Bofur had found out too. The playful way his eyes twinkled let me know immediately he enjoyed my little prank to Kili.

I was now clutching at my bra tightly, holding it against my chest protectively and thought how ridiculous it probably looked like. After all it was only a bra, an old, overused one at that; but I didn't want to let these men and boys catch it again.

I noticed that Ori was observing me, frowning, still clearly blissfully unaware. I was observing while he stared intensely at my chest and I was glad I did that. Suddenly Ori's face went from its natural pale rosy colour to a bright red. It had been so sudden that I couldn't help but laugh. Ori looked so embarrassed too…

I laughed so much that I bent in two, leaning heavily on the table in order not to fall on the floor. Bofur evidently couldn't hold his laugh anymore and he soon roared with laughter too. From his laugh and also the way he apologized discreetly, I knew the blond dwarf had finally understood too. Meanwhile Dori was still going on and on with Kili about the proper way to behave in front of a lady…and Kili was still complaining that he didn't understand.

Sending me a playful wink, the blond turned to his brother and said.

"Kili, stop complaining, I'm sure mother would be happy to explain. "

"But Fili…"

I laughed some more at the look of disappointment on Kili's face, before quickly going to put the annoying piece of lingerie in my room.

Yes, I had changed. I was changing. I could tell I was a different person already and it scared me slightly. On the other hand I couldn't help but feel relieved too. I didn't mind who I was starting to become.

As I sat next to Nori who was once again smoking rather peacefully, I wondered whether those men had any idea about the influence they were having on me. I felt better in my skin here; it felt as if I was slowly starting to find myself. At 25, you'd think that I'd know already who I was. Well apparently not. This person who was speaking aloud and scolding grown men, this person who could accept embarrassment and could tease people back…this person was someone I could start to appreciate.

I was slowly growing out of my shell and I wasn't stupid, I knew I owed it mostly to these strange and cheeky people.

While everyone, except for Kili who had left to look for Dís and Fili who had followed him, was sitting back around the table still chuckling slightly, I smiled to myself. I really enjoyed it here.

For the first time, I suddenly realized I could really grow to love this place more than I ever did my world.

I might very well be one day thankful for ending up here, with these people.

* * *

><p>A bit later, in the early evening, we were all gathered in the living room. Dori had lighted a huge fire in the hearth. I sat in a chair close to the fire, Nori facing me though he was slightly hidden by the shadows casted by the flames. The dwarves were enjoying their ale, even Dori and Ori, while I peacefully sipped at my tea. At some point, Bofur decided that our evening had been peaceful enough and thought it'd be fun to try and coerce me into drinking ale too.<p>

"Come on lass, it was so much fun last time."

"No Bofur.' I answered sternly.

"Last time? What last time?" Dori wondered.

I glanced at Ori. Had no one told Dori about my little escapade in the Halls' corridors? I was pretty certain that the King at least would have somehow found a way to tell Dori to keep a closer eye on his 'human'. Ori shrugged slightly and shook his head from side to side.

"Well, the time after she got lost in the corridors…' Bofur started.

"You got lost in the corridors?' He asked turning to look at me with wide eyes. 'Why did you get lost in the corridors?

"Hem, I was looking for Bofur and…" He didn't give me time to finish my sentence.

"Why didn't you ask Nori to show you the way?"

"Well Nori wasn't here so…' I tried to say before Dori once more interrupted me to turn towards his brother.

"You weren't there? You left Ori and Amelia alone and she got lost?"

I could already feel it was going to quickly turn into a yelling match. Ori's sad face and Bofur's dumbfounded one were clear enough to read. I looked at Nori who was glaring at his older brother.

"Ori is old enough to take care of Amelia.' He groaned.

I did enjoy the irony right then. After all, a few months ago it had been Nori who was angry after I got lost. In the mean time, Dori replied to him.

"You always leave and go do some thievery…What a shame! See where it leads you too! A thief! A dishonourable thief!" The ever sweet Dori snapped.

I didn't know why, but I suddenly felt that I had to intervene and stop this quarrel or Nori might just disappear for weeks once more. No way was I going to let that happen. I didn't want him to leave again and I sure didn't want to find him lying in his blood ever again. I spoke up quickly.

"Dori, please. Really nothing major happened at the time. Fili and Kili found me back and then we all had a good laugh and I got a bit drunk, that's it."

"Amelia, we should not take such a thing lightly. You're my ward, I have a responsibility towards you."

"Sure, I agree with that. But Dori, it really was nothing but an accident. You all have to start trusting me a little. I'm trying hard to adapt, but you have to make compromises too.' I was a bit tired of all their endless talks about my protection.

"Compromises?' Dori asked after everyone had remained silent for several minutes.

"Well yes. Where I come from, women are mostly independent. They live alone, they work and some choose never to get married. Women are allowed to take their own decisions and are not protected by kin or guardians anymore."

They all looked shocked at those few words. Of course I had already told them when we first met, that it was normal for me to walk around by myself, but I wasn't sure they really believed me back then. I continued carefully.

"I'm not saying I don't like how things are being done around here. I am just saying that, sometimes, you need to let me take my own decisions; accept that I might want to do things on my own or in my own way. And if I get hurt then so be it, you'd have no responsibility in it whatsoever. You need to respect my choices and wills. In exchange, I promise I'll always take into consideration your opinion."

"Amelia, it's not really how things are done here…"

"Are you telling me that any of you would go and order Dís around because she's a woman?' I quirked an eyebrow at them.

"Well no…"

Dori didn't have the time to finish though, for someone knocked loudly at the door. Ori quickly stood up and opened it before stepping out of Dís' way. I blinked at seeing her appear almost magically just after I had mentioned her. Then I smirked at the sight; Dís strode in, one of her hands holding tightly on Kili's right ear. The young dwarf was bent in two, a grimace on the face, but completely silent. Fili wasn't far behind, smirking slightly and eyes alight with mirth.

"Apologize immediately.' Dís snapped at her youngest son.

"I'm…I'm really sorry lady Amelia and I promise I won't ever come close to your bindings. Ow, mother…' he whined when Dís yanked slightly on his ear. 'I'm deeply ashamed at my childish behaviour. It was totally unbecoming of my status. I am really sorry and hope you'll accept my deepest, sincerest apology."

I had a hard time stopping the slight smirk that threatened to pop on my face. Bofur coughed lightly and I knew he was struggling not to laugh aloud. I didn't pay attention to him though and glanced at Dís. She looked clearly uncertain; apparently she wasn't sure I hadn't been deeply offended by her son's actions. I reassured her with a smile and a nod before accepting Kili's apology.

"I'm sorry to have intruded like this on your evening' Dís then said, nodding at each dwarf 'But this matter simply couldn't wait."

"Oh, but Dís, it's actually perfect that you're here!' I suddenly exclaimed, a sly smirk on the lips.

"Is it now?' Her face remained impassive as I nodded.

"Yes, I was just telling them that they should let me take my own decisions, even if it means allowing me to make mistakes and maybe get hurt." I said quickly, hoping Dori wouldn't interrupt me.

"And what do you all think of that?" Dís asked the dwarves.

They all shifted uncomfortably on their seats. I could see that they hesitated to tell anything to Dís who had finally let her son go. Kili was now rubbing at his ear vigorously while taking a few steps away from his mother. I glanced at the dwarves around; it was both strange and funny to see them so uncertain in front of Dís, though I had to admit that even I would be squirmy under Dís steely gaze.

"Well, we just think that Amelia should be careful in what she does.' Dori tried to be diplomatic.

"She's old enough to take her own decisions.' Dís countered.

"Old enough? She's but a child…' Nori muttered and I glared at him.

"A child that saved your life recently, if I recall correctly…' Dís stated matter-of-factly and I smiled broadly at her.

"We just don't want to see her hurt."

"And I don't want my sons to behave like idiots. They do though."

"Oy!' Fili complained before shrinking under his mother's glare.

"I'm her guardian, it's my responsibility to take care of her.' Dori insisted.

"True, but it doesn't mean you have to suffocate her. It just means that you have to be here when she does make mistakes.' Dís answered in a shrug.

"I'm not a reckless person Dori. I'm happy you're so concerned about me and that you all take care of me. But I just wish for a little more trust and liberties. I cannot ask you permission for everything I do, and I don't want you to protect me from everything. It's alright if I get hurt sometimes. That's how someone grows, by making mistake and learning from them."

Dís nodded, clearly agreeing with me, but I could see that the dwarves around were reluctant, even though Bofur did seem to understand and slightly agree with me. Dori, Nori and Ori were all frowning, pouting really, just like children. It would have been fun if I hadn't known that it meant they just didn't understand me. I glanced at Dís who simply stared back. Obviously she thought she had already said enough and that it was now my problem to solve.

Well I guess she had helped a lot already. I sighed and walked to Dori to put my hand on his arm.

"I'm not saying I want to go run around and do dangerous things. I'm not stupid, well not that stupid I mean. It's just, I want you to understand that at some point I might need to take decisions on my own and even if you think I'm making a mistake, I would like you to simply explain to me why you think so and then let me make the final decision."

"It might prove difficult to let you do something when I know it could hurt you."

"But if you don't let me experience it on my own, then I will never be able to become stronger."

"You don't have to become stronger. You have us with you.' Nori groaned, clearly upset.

"I trust you all, but I want to be strong. I want to… Everyone around is so strong, I don't want to remain the little, helpless human girls anymore."

"I don't think many people see you like that…' Ori thought aloud.

"Maybe not, but that's how I see myself.' I replied softly before turning back to Dori. ' So, what do you think? Will you all be able to let me take some decisions on my own?"

Dori was stiff and clearly grumpy, though when his eyes fell on me, I could only see concern and kindness in them. He put his large hand on my much smaller one and squeezed it slightly.

"I can't promise you anything, but I swear I'll try."

I smiled broadly at him. Knowing he would at least think about it felt like a huge victory already. I wouldn't lie and say that I didn't like the fact that the dwarves took care of me. Actually it usually felt great in a sort of odd, guilty way, to be pampered by them as if I was something precious. Yet, I couldn't forget entirely notions I had known all my life before I came up here. The fact that dwarvish women were pampered was all nice and good, but I could tell that some of them were more independent.

I couldn't put aside my need for freedom. Even though I had always been a rather introverted person and had always dutifully listened to my aunt and uncle, I had been able to take my own decisions. Considering our family's past, my uncle and aunt hadn't at first been happy with my choice of study and career. Still, it had been my choice and even though it had brought me more pain than I could have imagined, I still didn't regret choosing to follow that path.

The three brothers had to understand that I simply couldn't live a life where I would have to always follow their decisions. Saying goodbye at Thorin's Halls' entrance and then wait patiently for weeks until they came back, was clearly not the life I was dreaming of. No I couldn't picture myself in such a way. I couldn't see myself obeying their every order and never voicing my opinion, never taking choices. Of course I wasn't the kind of person to speak loudly and freely. And of course until now I had truly nothing to complain about, but I felt that it was better to state right now that I didn't intend to obey blindly to all their decisions.

Dori apparently respected my opinion and, even though it was obvious he didn't like it, Nori was grudgingly accepting it too. Ori surprised me though, because he simply smirked. He clearly was as protective of me as his brothers, but he could understand my point of view rather easily. After all, his brothers tended to over protect him too.

In the end, Dís, Fili and Kili stayed with us during the whole evening and we improvised a dinner with what we could find in the cellars. I was a bit ashamed I had forgotten to go and buy food, but in the end, there was always plenty to eat anyway.

I looked at the dwarves around and was glad we had that discussion earlier. I didn't know what was in store for me in the future, but I couldn't find it in myself to be worried. Somehow, knowing the three brothers had my back was reassuring enough. I knew perfectly well that, even if I were to take a bad decision, they would still be there for me.

For the first time I realized how at ease I felt around here. How easy it was becoming for me to speak up for myself when I had never done so. It felt strangely thrilling to be able to voice my opinion and better yet, it was exhilarating that people around would actually listen to what I said.

All in all I was in a sort of giddy state of mind all evening and just couldn't sleep. After having spent some hours turning and tossing in my bed, I decided to simply go back to the kitchen and prepare myself a calming infusion. Silence was reigning in the dark rooms and the only light that filtered was that of the moon; we hadn't shut the shutters in the kitchen that night.

I was holding a candle that I had lighted in my room; I still needed to use an ember for that, I seemed completely unable to light a fire without a proper, modern, lighter. Thus I was glad to see there were still embers in the oven and I just needed to add some wood and wait before it would warm enough.

As I was patiently waiting I felt, more than saw or heard, something shift in my back. I turned, not expecting to see anything or anyone.

"Holy cr… Nori!" I gasped, startled.

One of my hands was clutching at my tunic, above my heart, which was pounding loudly in my chest. The sneaky bastard had scared me.

"Couldn't you simply tell me you were there?' I whispered angrily, still shaken by his sudden appearance in the room.

"Sorry." He mumbled.

He was hidden in the shadows, as always, leaning against the far wall, arms crossed against his chest. I couldn't see his face clearly and much less his eyes, but I knew he was observing me. I shrugged and turned my back to him. He gave me some time for my poor heart to calm down and after long minutes of silence, he finally spoke his mind.

"Why are you so…careless about your own safety?" He whispered and I had actually trouble to hear him.

I didn't answer at first. The metal of the oven was hot now and the water I had put in a small pan was almost boiling already. I mechanically prepared my infusion of chamomile, poured it in a cup and silently went to sit at the table. After a few minutes, Nori took a seat in front of me. Now at least I could see a bit of his features.

"I could ask you the same question, don't you think?" I said in a murmur.

I looked up slightly and saw that he was turning his pipe in his hands, a frown on his face. At some point though, he glanced at me and we stared at each other for a short while before I decided to speak.

"Nori' I sighed 'Can't you see why I need to do that?"

Looking at his deepening frown I guessed we were not going to go anywhere with this discussion. I suddenly felt fear growing in the pit of my stomach. What if we ended up arguing like last time? I didn't want to go back to this awful months where we didn't speak with each other. I had to make him understand, and I had to do it without angering him. I swallowed the lump that was starting to form in my throat and told him softly.

"Nori you disappear, sometimes for weeks, and you risk your life every time you leave."

"It's not the same.' He grumbled, interrupting me.

"You're right, it's not.' I continued just as softly. 'It's not because I won't put my life at risk, I'm not asking you to let me do that. Besides I know you're leaving for a reason and I don't ask you to stop, even though it scared me more than anything else to see you…"

I couldn't manage to say the words. An image of Nori, pale, bloody and weak crossed my mind and I squeezed my eyes shut for a second. I shook my head slightly; I dearly hoped never to see him in such a state ever again.

"All I want, all I ask' I said after a few minutes. 'Is that you give me the opportunity to make my choices. Just as I let you make yours, even though it's hard, even though it's against your beliefs."

"You don't understand. I can't.' He whispered before pausing for a short while. 'I can't let you get hurt. I can't let you make a choice that I know will hurt you in the end."

He had stopped playing with his pipe now and I saw that his fists were clenched tightly. On a sudden impulse, I extended my arm and leant over the table before I took one of his hands in mine. I squeezed it lightly and Nori startled before looking in my eyes.

"Nori. It will hurt me more in the end if you never let me make my decisions." I said holding his gaze.

His eyes reflected how torn he felt at that moment and I knew I certainly mirrored his feelings. I was asking him something that quite obviously went against all his instincts. It was strange to realize that for all his fussing and worrying, Dori wasn't actually the most protective of the three brothers. I was now quite certain that Nori was. In his own quiet, discreet and sneaky way, Nori was the one that took the most risks and in counterpart tried to protect everyone the most.

Realizing that made me see our dispute on a whole new level and I finally understood what had angered him so much the last time. It wasn't me getting lost or coming back drunk with Ori the next morning. It probably wasn't the fact that I made light of the situation either. No. From what I understood now, it was the uncertainty, the lack of control and the fact that he had been entirely unable to help and protect me that had angered him so much. Now I guessed that he probably had been more furious against himself than he was against me.

"You can't imprison me here Nori. I told you already.' He winced, clearly remembering my words. 'Just like I can't stop you when you have to go out and search for whatever it is you're looking for."

"Amelia…I.' He sighed and shook his head.

"I don't like the fact that you're a thief. I can't even start to tell you how much it scares me to even think about what could happen to you because I know you'll soon disappear again. Actually, considering the fact that I found you dying on the floor, I'm pretty sure I'd rather bind you on that seat and spoon feed you for the rest of your life, than letting you go out again."

After those words, Nori looked at me and I could see a small twinkle in his eyes. He arched his eyebrow then and I could even spot a tiny smirk on his lips. I simply shrugged, it truly wasn't far from what I was feeling, and spoke once more.

"Still, even though I hate it, even though I can't agree with your choice, I won't stop you. I won't even try to do it because I know it's something you need to do. I need to be able to make my own choices. Can't you trust me at all?' I whispered, keeping my voice as soft as possible.

"I do trust you.' He sighed deeply before continuing. 'I won't stop you. I'll let you make your choices.' He sounded so defeated then that it hurt me.

"Nori, I swear I'm not going to run directly towards danger. I'm just asking you to listen to my opinion, especially when it concerns my life, just like you'd listen to Dís."

"But you're not Dís, you weren't born in this world. You know nothing of its dangers."

"And that's why I have you to advise me.' I softly replied. 'Besides, I'm obliged to be cautious about what I do; Dori would probably have a heart attack if the both of us started to run around in the wild recklessly."

Nori looked at me and I saw the corner of his mouth slightly quirk upwards. During all this time my hand had been on his but at that moment he turned his hand to grab mine.

"We wouldn't want my poor brother to suffer that, now would we?' He said, squeezing my hand and I smiled softly at him before answering.

"Aye, that's why I will stay level headed and serious while you run recklessly around and worry all of us." I mock sighed.

Nori smirked at me and I felt that we had reached an understanding of sort. I hoped he knew I wouldn't risk my life on purpose or suddenly become reckless.

"It means a lot that you trust me Nori." I whispered once more.

He didn't answer, simply hummed slightly and squeezed my hand. I felt suddenly tired and Nori must have realized it for he let my hand go and stood up. I looked at him while he slowly came to stand beside me. He put his hand on my shoulder and gently squeezed it.

"You should rest now."

"I'm the healer here, and you're the one that was injured a few weeks ago. Go to bed Nori or I'll make you." I admonished him, though a smile tugged at my lips.

He quirked his eyebrow and smirked before he leaned and whispered directly in my ear.

"Really?"

He winked at me then and simply left silently while I couldn't stop a broad smile to grow on my face.

Once I was back in my room I shook my head, still smiling. I was relieved to have been able to talk with Nori, and really glad that our discussion hadn't degenerated into another dispute. I knew I was asking him something difficult but I trusted him to respect his own words. I hoped he knew I wouldn't ask them to let me do really stupid things. It wasn't in me anyway to become someone reckless. I was too cautious, level headed and rational to ever put myself into some weird, dangerous and uncertain situation.

Still I found myself curious about my own capacities. I had always been doubtful about what I could do and had never been eager to discover things that were out of my 'comfort zone'. Now though I felt like I could, and should, be able to explore a bit more what I was capable of. I wanted to better know who I was, who I could be and become.

I now lived among people who were hardened by life to an extreme point. Most of them had seen or experienced things I hoped never to experience myself; who would actually want to face a bloody dragon or wander the wild and continuously have to fight for his life? No, those weren't the kind of experiences I wanted to have. But still, they were strong. And I didn't speak only of their physical strength. No. I respected them more than they could imagine simply because they were able to live on, to laugh and joke, despite all the hardship they encountered.

I wanted to be like that. I didn't want to be the weak girl who'd run away at each difficulty, the one who'd lower her head and walk away when she was hurt by others.

I doubted the dwarves knew it, but they were slowly influencing me.

And I really couldn't be mad with them for such an influence.

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><p><strong>AN: Hello everyone! First of all, thanks for the reviews :) You are all awesome! Thanks to Sofia, Mary and the nameless guest who reviewed too! **

**Thanks to Kapibarasan too for the tip about quotations, I hope it's more clear now like that. :P**

**Now... Most of you asked me what Nori was looking for...I won't tell you but I promise you'll have the answer at some point in later chapters :) Be patient ^^**

**About this chapter... First don't expect all the others to be so huge, this one is a bit of an exception and I just didn't want to cut it in two. That aside, I'm not entirely happy with how the two talks came out (with Dori and with Nori). I hope you're not too disappointed. I felt that both were needed, but I'm not convinced with what I made of them...anyway, what's done is done and after re-reading and editing this chapter so many times, I just can't see it anymore ^^**

**The next update will likely be on Monday or Tuesday. Starting next chapter, we'll go in slightly more adventurous waters :)**

**Thank you all for your support! It's really great and motivating!**


	15. Off to see the World

**Everything belongs to JRR Tolkien except for my OC and the plot**

* * *

><p>Time slowly passed and I realized one day I had completely lost count of the months I had spent within the dwarves' halls. It dawned on me quite suddenly and I was completely befuddled by my own lack of interest in the passing time.<p>

It wasn't really surprising actually, considering I never stepped out of the mountain. I had spent entire months living inside the halls without even feeling the need to see the sky. How odd was that? According to Ori, it wasn't odd at all; it just highlighted how perfectly I fitted within the dwarves' households. I hadn't answered to this claim, feeling that it made Ori happy to think I was adapting so well to their culture, and maybe, just maybe, he wasn't that far from the truth.

The moment I had come to realize about this time issue was a perfectly normal day; after leaving the healing wards, I had gone to the market, intent on buying some more meat for that evening's dinner. Before going to the meat and other food stands though, I went to see whether Bifur would be here. The seemingly silent dwarf had always intrigued me even though we couldn't really communicate. With that blasted axe in his head I had that odd morbid urge to check on him frequently, and I hadn't seen him in awhile. Making my way through the crowd of dwarves I suddenly realized how cold it felt.

The temperature within the halls was usually quite unchanging, which was comfortable, though I always found it a bit too cool, thus the massive use of roaring fires in dwarves' houses. Right now though, the temperature wasn't cool, it was damn freaking cold. I looked around to realize that most dwarves and the few humans I could see, were wearing long leather coats, hats, fur lined coats and other scarves and mittens.

I glanced toward the massive opened doors and found out the landscape wasn't its usual mixture of blue stones, green trees and brown grounds. Instead it was all painted in white, coated in fresh snow.

My eyes widened as I did the math in my head. I had been here for at least six months, probably closer to seven, if there was snow outside. I had arrived in early June, if I considered the time of the year hadn't changed from my world to this one.

Stepping once more in the general direction of Bifur's stand, I kept musing on this new realization. I truly hadn't been thinking about my family and world in the past month. Actually my life had been really peaceful and uneventful recently and my days were spent similarly, following a quiet routine.

The nightmares that had plagued my nights at first were all but a memory. The fright at the situation had long disappeared. I had adapted fairly well and didn't think about things I missed; electricity, chocolate and coconut had long been forgotten. I had adapted fairly well to my life with Dori, Nori and Ori. The three of them had been almost constantly here these past few weeks, even Nori, though I knew he wanted to get out and look for those…things. Yes, I enjoyed my life with the three of them, to the point where my family was pushed in the back of my mind.

I gasped at finding out how I hadn't thought about my family in such a long time. At first they had been ever present in my mind. Now though my thoughts were busy with medicinal plants, ointments recipes and people I had come to care greatly about.

How could someone change so quickly? Wasn't what I did a sort of betrayal?

I had arrived in front of Bifur but didn't really see him; actually I didn't even see Bofur smiling at me from under a weird hat I had never seen him use before. The two dwarves exchanged a glance before Bofur walked to me, stopping a step away. It took him waving his hand in front of my nose to see him.

"Bofur, hey, it's been awhile.' I said, slightly startled.

"What is it? You looked like you were miles away."

"I was … thinking… of my previous home." I answered slowly in a small voice, looking down.

I felt Bofur's finger under my chin as he forced me to look up at his exceptionally serious eyes. I really wasn't used to see his face with a slight concerned frown.

"I understand you miss your home, but aren't you alright here?"

I looked at him forlornly, riddled with guilt, and shook my head.

"You don't understand. I'm perfectly fine here, it's just I hadn't thought of it in awhile and I hadn't pay attention to the time passing. I was surprised is all."

"It is natural for you to try and adapt. It's been around eight months now…" He said before I interrupted him.

"Eight months?" I was puzzled by that information.

Eight months? Had it really been that long? How come I didn't see the days pass at all? How? Bofur clearly saw the effect such information had on me, he kindly patted my shoulder and talked in a soothing tone.

"You shouldn't let it worry you. You adapted fairly well to life here, among us. I dare say you like it too.' He paused then and a sad frown marred his usually cheery face. 'But I'm afraid you'll always have mixed feelings now, just as many dwarves living here have."

"What do you mean?" I frowned, choosing to concentrate on the last sentences he said.

"You have two homes now." He shrugged. "Same as us. We have Erebor, which we'll always long for. And we have this place that we came to love out of necessity. I wish you'll feel at home with us, but I believe you'll always miss your previous one."

Even though it was weird when Bofur spoke seriously, I felt he was right about this and I nodded to show I agreed, somehow. Yet I needed to speak with someone and he and Bifur were here to listen, so I muttered.

"There is a difference though. A major one."

"Well it's true we could still try and reclaim Erebor…"He started but I cut in.

"That's not it. You said you came to love it here because it was necessary. What disturbs me most is that I feel better here than I ever did back there. I love this place more already, and it scares me. I feel like I'm betraying…them."

Bofur's look showed perfectly how compassionate this dwarf could be. His soft smile alone warmed my heart and I couldn't resist smiling back.

"There's nothing wrong in that Meli."

I quirked an eyebrow at this new nickname and I smirked slightly.

"Meli?"

"Aye." He laughed loudly. "Amelia is definitely too long a name for someone living here with us."

"Meli it is then…" I knew a lost battle when I saw one. Dwarves were too stubborn for their own good and Bofur seemed quite happy with this newfound nickname.

I was astonished as to how a few words, a smile and a laugh from this man could so easily affect my mood and change it for the better. I sighed softly and chose to change topics.

"What's that thing on your head by the way? Is it still alive?" I joked poking gingerly at his hat.

"Oy lass, never, ever say anything bad about his hat!"

I turned to face the dwarf whose booming voice had prevented Bofur to defend his hat's honour.

"Hello Gloin. So the hat is off limits?" I said and winked at Bofur who glared at me playfully.

"Aye, he made it himself when he was a wee lad.' Gloin answered and I distinctly heard Bifur huff a chuckle behind me.

"Oh that explains the craftsmanship then." I joked.

"Well…in truth he lost a bet." Gloin started before Bofur cut in.

"Oy! I won that bet and you know it!' He complained loudly while Bifur chuckled some more.

"You're wearing that thing every winter or every time you go out. I don't consider that winning." Gloin laughed heartily.

I saw Bofur was getting ready to reply but I cut in, truly curious about this hat now.

"Stop, I'm quite sure there's a story I don't know behind this whole hat affair. And I want to hear it." I extended my arms in both their directions and looked questioningly at Gloin after sending an evil grin in Bofur's direction.

"We made a bet, how long ago was it already? Well anyway we made that bet that Bofur wouldn't be able to sew a proper hat. He ended up creating that…thing currently on his head, and asked us to pay off our losses. When we complained that it wasn't a proper hat, he put it on his head and said as long as he wore it, then it was a hat. We paid up but made sure he never had anything else on his head. Since then he became quite protective of it."

I smiled a toothy grin at Bofur, feeling suddenly in quite a childish mood, and with a swift and quick swap with my hand I managed to grab the hat. Bofur had ducked, apparently thinking I was going to slap him, easing my job immensely. I was certain that his dwarf's reflexes wouldn't have allowed me to take a hold of the offending object otherwise.

As soon as I had the hat in my hand, I dashed away, waving in the crowd, laughing because for once my tiny, smaller shape was a distinct advantage to slalom between dwarves and stands. I had heard Bofur's shout of protest and both Gloin's and Bifur's laugh. I glanced above my shoulder and squeaked when I saw the dwarf was close to catch me already.

I quickly put the hat on my head and concentrated on taking the most complicated way to reach the exist. Once I arrived at the massive doors, I stopped and turned. Bofur wasn't far behind and, to my relief, wasn't offended by my mad dash. On the contrary he seemed greatly amused by it all.

"Lass, this is a declaration of war, you have to know that."

"Nuh uh. It's retribution for all the time you made fun of me."

At that he broke into a loud laugh, holding his sides. I soon joined him for his laugh was quite contagious. It felt so good to laugh over something so silly, it was somehow so liberating. For a moment, all my worries eased away. After awhile, once we had calmed down, I threw his hat back at him and he caught it easily.

"I'm actually impressed, I'd never be able to do anything even remotely as good as that" I said pointing at his hat.

At the same time I heard known voices arriving from behind me and I quickly turned to meet with Dori, Balin, Dwalin, the King and his two nephews.

"Amelia, what are you doing here?' Dori asked me genuinely curious.

"Stealing Bofur's hat.' I deadpanned, earning quirked eyebrows from everyone and chuckles from the two younger dwarves. 'What about you?"

"We were discussing another trading trip I'll have to make soon." Dori answered simply.

I didn't know what had gotten into me that day but I suddenly blurted out.

"Oh, can I go with you this time?"

All the dwarves stared at me in silence for several long minutes and I shifted on my feet, feeling uneasy under their scrutiny. I didn't think my question was stupid though, actually it was quite legitimate. Why couldn't I go out with Dori?

"It wouldn't be wise for a little girl to do such a journey." Dwalin groaned.

"First, I'm not little, slightly short maybe but I didn't think people around would hold it against me." At that Fili and Kili smirked but I didn't pay attention to them and kept on. "Second I really want to go. I haven't been outside the halls since my arrival and the night those men…well you know." I pleaded.

"That's exactly why we do not wish for you to go on such journey. It is dangerous and you have no mean to fend for yourself." Balin tried to explain but I was having none of it.

"Maybe, but on the other hand I'll never learn if no one teach me. Plus, if this journey is so dangerous, you might need a healer. And finally I promise I'll obey everything you say and would not leave your side for a second. There'd be absolutely no risk for me to get lost in the wild."

I looked at Dori and Balin who seemed to hesitate. I glanced quickly around and mentally counted my chances. Dwalin was apparently absolutely against me leaving the halls. Bofur, Fili and Kili were smiling, which I guessed was a good sign. And finally the King still had the same unreadable frown, which didn't help me whatsoever.

I was about to try and plead my case again when Fili, the older nephew, spoke.

"Uncle, maybe if you don't agree for her to go to this trip, then she could come with us."

"For the last time, you're not going anywhere Fili!" The King grunted.

"You said we shouldn't go alone because Kili was too reckless and we were too often wounded and hurt. If she comes with us on a mission, then her presence would force us to be more careful, because we'll have to protect her."

"And if we go on a short mission, she'll be able to get out of the halls and the risks would be minor." Kili piped in.

"Fili, Kili, you're not experienced enough to go alone, especially not if that means taking an extra charge with you." The King sighed and I tried not to get offended by the whole 'charge' part.

"Amelia could go with us actually; she'd be safe in such a group and we aren't going far anyway."

Everyone's eyes snapped to Balin who was now smiling nicely. He looked at each one of us, winking at me and continued.

"I'm sure she'd be perfectly safe with us brother. Between you, me and the others, there's almost no risk for her. Besides, if Amelia gets used to travel, we might add her healer services to our mercenary skills' list. She'd be able to travel a bit, and we'd all be able to profit from it."

"But what about us?" Kili still tried unsuccessfully.

I hadn't thought about the money argument, but I guessed Balin being a dwarf would think about it quickly. In the end, that was his idea that won. Dwarves really loved their profit, though I wasn't fair by saying that. Everyone here worked hard, slaving away willingly in the mines and forges in order for the whole community to earn money and shape the halls into a kingdom to be proud of.

In the end, I was allowed to go simply because Balin was my guardian and had agreed. Fili and Kili though, were still stuck in the Halls for as long as their uncle and mother decided against them going on a mission. I felt bad for them, but at the moment I was entirely too happy to empathise that much and instead of listening to their complaints, I rushed to the healing wards to tell Oin about my absence.

Oin hadn't been too enchanted when I told him I would leave the Halls for approximately a week. He had forced me to repeat my sentences four times and I was slowly starting to believe that this was his way of punishing me. This dwarf had the uncanny habit of hearing perfectly sometimes…and not at all at other moments. I knew he was partially deaf, but still, I was starting to wonder how much he really was.

In the end he grumbled, grunted, huffed and groaned before leaving me in the middle of the healing wards to go to the back room. I didn't need to be a genius to understand that he didn't like the fact I would be leaving on the morrow and didn't want to talk about it anymore.

I didn't waste more time, Oin clearly didn't want to discuss this, and he wasn't the worse dwarf I would have to face that day.

Nope.

As I made my way towards the brothers' house, I wondered how they would react. Dori hadn't been happy earlier, but I wasn't sure what Nori and Ori would say. We had a conversation a while ago about me taking my own decisions, but I hadn't put it into practice until now. I wasn't sure how they would take the fact that it had already been decided.

When I pushed the door to enter I took a deep breath and put a large smile on my face.

Awhile later, after the endless arguments were finally over, I was finally allowed to leave; not that the brothers could have stopped me anyway but I guessed they felt slightly better to have 'allowed' me to go. Silly dwarves…

In the end, the day that had started fairly normally ended up with me borrowing a travel bag from Ori and trying to prepare it with his help while Nori was complaining and Dori worrying.

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><p>"For the last time Nori, I'll be fine. I'm going with four dwarves. One of them is Balin, I'm pretty sure he knows how to fight and even Dwalin is coming, surely he's strong enough to protect us, right? Besides we're just leaving for one small week. I'll be back before you miss me."<p>

My attempt at a joke fell flat and Nori's face was expressing quite magnificently how unimpressed he was by my attitude. He was about to complain again when I stopped him and said.

"Please Nori, I need to do this. I want to go out and see your world. Our world I think I should say, for I don't believe after eight months here that I'll ever find my way back." I had almost whispered the last part and I saw Nori frown.

"Amelia, our land is dangerous.' He told me obviously worried already. "There are bandits, wolves, goblins, orcs, elves…" He started to enumerate.

"I know. But I won't be alone. I'm sure the others will protect me. And as I said, there is absolutely no risk in this mission. We just have to go there, negotiate some new contracts and that's it. It's almost like a stroll in the halls."

"Remind me what happened the last time you took a stroll in the halls by yourself?"

"Oy, that's harsh and you know it! Come on, even you have to admit I don't risk anything with this mission and those dwarves." I insisted.

Nori didn't look convinced and left me alone with Ori who had stayed silent until then.

"He's just worried.' Ori sweetly whispered. 'We all are." He added.

"I know Ori. I know because I worry each time Dori goes or Nori disappears. But I really want to do this. I feel like it's about time for me to have a look around."

Ori smiled sadly and nodded. He then looked a bit sheepish before taking something from one of his pockets and handing it to me.

"Here, I always have one with me, I find it…reassuring? Anyway, it's just in order to keep your mind occupied or to have something to do in the evenings…And you might find something interesting to write…or not."

I smiled gratefully at Ori and took the small notebook and pencil he had in his hands.

"Thanks Ori, I'm sure I'll find things to write, and we'll have plenty of topics to talk about when I'll be back."

I was fairly sure he understood why I had insisted to go because he knew how much I had been struggling with many different thoughts at times. He had been here all along to help me put them in order. Ori was a dear friend and he knew I had been asking myself questions about this world and my oddly agreeable feelings about it.

I looked up when I heard Nori coming back in my room.

"Here, take this with you.' He grumbled while he handed me a sort of short knife.

The weapon was really short, probably not more than six inches long, the silvery blade was straight and less than two inches wide. Its handle had been wrapped tightly in a thin leather strip. It appeared to me that this weapon had been made to be useful and practical instead of pretty. Nori gave me a leather sheath too, to protect the blade and avoid cutting myself.

"It's one of my smaller daggers, be careful, I sharpened it a few days ago." He gruffly said.

"Nori, I wouldn't know how to use it." I told him, ready to refuse his present.

"Take it anyway. It might prove useful. You shouldn't go unarmed. I won't let you go without at least this."

I looked at him. His eyes had lost their usual cheeky glint. They looked incredibly worried and concerned instead. His brows were furrowed in a frown and I could easily read how much he wanted me to stay here. As I saw how much he seemed to struggle with himself at the moment, clearly hesitating between allowing me to go and imprisoning me here, I decided I wouldn't fight him about the dagger. If it made him feel better, I'd agree to take a sword even. I slowly nodded, taking the weapon, and I turned to put it in my bag when Dori rushed in.

"Here, I bought you new boots. You can't go in all this snow with your current shoes. The valleys will be fine, but the mountain paths might be tricky and icy. Put these on, try them."

"Thank you Dori" I beamed at him.

I turned my back to them, trying to hide my unshaved legs from their sight even though dwarves wouldn't actually mind that. Still, old habits die hard, besides these men would mind seeing a woman's legs anyway. I wondered whether I should chuckle at that or not, it all felt so completely different than what used to be normal in my previous life.

The boots were perfect; they fit and were made of thick brown leather and with warm and soft fur inside. It was incredibly comfortable to wear. I jumped then took a few steps before I turned toward the three men.

"They're wonderful, thanks!"

"You should put the dagger in it. It'll be safer to have it on you at all time and you can lose a bag. It's harder to lose a boot." Nori said quite obviously unhappy still. "Here, use this to strap the sheath on your shin."

He handed me some more leather bands and quickly illustrated on his own leg how I should put them properly. Imitating his moves, I was soon able to efficiently strap a dagger and hide it in my boot. Well, I would never have thought I'd ever learn anything like that.

That evening the three brothers spent their whole time giving me advices about anything and everything really. It got to the point that my head actually started to hurt and I had to stop them and retreat back in my room.

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><p>In the early morning, Dori came to wake me and guided me to the kitchen where he had prepared a voluminous breakfast. Bofur, Balin and Dwalin were here already and I slowed my steps.<p>

"We're leaving already? I'm late?" I asked my second guardian.

"No, Meli, they just decided to meet you here. No one would want you to get lost in the Halls before the journey even start. "

"Very funny Bofur…" I said ironically as he burst into happy laugh. "And why are you here anyway? Are you coming with us?"

"Nah, I just wanted to say goodbye."

I wanted to reply to him, but Nori's attention had been caught up by something else and he didn't give me the time to speak. He looked up and frowned, eyeing Bofur.

"Meli?" He glanced at me then and I shrugged.

"He said my name was too complicated for his brain to remember." I answered him while grabbing some bread.

"Oy!"

"It doesn't suit her at all!' Ori piped in, and Dori nodded.

Balin shook his head, smiling softly as if he knew already what was going to happen and Dwalin simply grunted while he kept on eating a huge plate of bacon and eggs.

"Oh … and then what would you use lad?" Bofur turned to look at Ori with a small smirk on his lips.

"Hmmm I'll have to think about it."

"Nicknames shouldn't be thought about!" Bofur exclaimed.

"Sure they should!"

"No they shouldn't!"

I sighed and chose to ignore their childish banter, concentrating on my breakfast. While the others were really arguing over a potential nickname for me, I started to eat as much as I could.

"You should wear your breeches and tunic instead of this dress." Nori whispered to me while poking at the half eaten sausage left in his plate.

He really was unhappy with me leaving if it hindered his appetite so much…

I glanced at the dress I had put on automatically and nodded. He was right of course and it'd be a nice occasion to wear them without risking everyone glancing at me awkwardly.

"I'll go change quickly."

"You have some time." He said pointing his fingers at the other dwarves. "They're not going to agree on anything any time soon and Dwalin still has to eat his third serving."

I laughed softly before finishing my breakfast and sneaking back in my room to change. When I came back they had finally stopped their stupid argument and Dwalin seemed ready to leave.

Dori, Nori, Ori and Bofur insisted on accompanying us to the massive doors and it made my heart swell with warmth and love for these dwarves.

I hugged each of them before stepping back as Balin, Dwalin, Hràr and Péri, the merchants that came with us, started to trail down the path. I quickly started to follow them, though I couldn't help but glancing over my shoulder and waving at the three brothers and Bofur one last time. I was going to miss them.

I felt a strange, unusual feeling of uneasiness and slight pain. It made me frown and if any of the other realized my mood had suddenly changed, none commented on it. We walked at a rapid pace, well as rapidly as we could, considering the layer of snow and ice coating parts of the path we followed for now.

The landscape was really amazing and the mountains' tops that were looming far above us shone in the sun. I didn't feel the cold, thanks to my warm clothes and the rapid pace we kept, but I could smell the unmistakable odour of fresh snow. Thankfully the layer of snow on the path we were walking was rather thin, a few inches only, and we could walk pretty easily without slipping on hidden ice patches.

The blue tinged stones mixed wonderfully with the white snow and the other greyish rocks. The ice at the top of the mountain glinted and added to the overall blue tones of the whole landscape. All in all I could only say it was breath taking to see such a wonderful sight.

Travelling with Dwalin, Balin, Hràr and Péri was awkward. Péri didn't speak much with me; he seemed like a real grumpy dwarf and barely uttered a few words in answer for any question asked. Actually if he could simply answer by 'yes' or 'no' he seemed perfectly fine, better yet if a grunt sufficed. I wondered many times why such an unfriendly character had been sent to negotiate new contracts. Surely the ability to act nicely and diplomatically was important? Apparently not to this dark haired and bearded dwarf…and Hràr wasn't much better. Actually he wasn't far from being worse. He sometimes glared at me and groaned about women who should stay in the safety of the Halls. I didn't even try to correct the red headed dwarf who seemed a fine example of stubbornness.

After several hours I already had decided to ignore as much as possible those two moody dwarves, letting them walk ahead while I was in the back with Balin.

Dwalin for his part remained the gruff and grunting dwarf I had met so many months ago. He wasn't mean or nice; he was just minding his own business, completely uncaring of what I could do unless it was something that was dangerous, or that he considered stupid. I didn't mind him, spending most of my time with Balin who kindly answered to every question I might have. The time was passing slowly and we walked at an easy pace now, none of us seemed in a particular hurry to arrive in that town.

"So," I asked Balin after awhile spent in silence. "Where are we going exactly? What are we going to do?"

"Well, we're going to a small town called Gorm. There isn't much there, but the master has been trading with us sporadically, mostly buying trinkets and other luxury items. He bought them mostly through one of the shops held by humans that sell our products." Balin explained with a smile. "We're supposed to try and draw complete contracts with them."

"What exactly do we want from them?" I wondered.

If that town was so small, what could they offer to the dwarves? I could understand the need to sell products, but what could we have in exchange? Only money?

"This town is located on our way when our caravans leave for the southern regions. We want them to offer free lodging and food to our caravans. It will take us only three, maybe four days to go there, but a whole caravan of merchants with full trunks and chariots will almost take double the time to go down the mountain. A warm and safe spot to stop at will be greatly appreciated before rushing in the wild."

As Balin talked I understood this really was the primary reason of our mission and I doubted they would care that much about selling other products. While I thought about it though, Balin kept on explaining our goals to me.

"We'll try and see whether we can find someone to open a shop for us too. If we manage to settle some permanent shops there, we might attract people from other towns." Balin added.

"What are you planning to offer them then? Silver items? Weapons?"

I heard Dwalin snort at that and I looked at him. He was walking slightly ahead of us but he glanced at me from above his shoulder.

"They are peasants. They wouldn't know what to do with weapons." He grunted.

I nodded, idly wondering whether Dwalin wasn't underestimating them. After all, peasants or not, people in this era surely knew how to defend themselves; it seemed to me it was necessary. This reminded me that I was entirely defenceless and I frowned a bit. Would the brothers ever agree to let me learn how to defend myself? I'm sure I'd be able to convince them over time. At that moment though, Balin answered my question, forcing me to focus on him again.

"We are going to propose our products. They wouldn't have need for jewellery or weaponry, but we can sell other things. We can produce better tools for them, leather products, and copper items and for the master specifically a few luxury products."

"How is that ever going to work?" I frowned. How could one exchange items for service? It didn't make sense. "It feels as if we're going to have a better deal than them."

Dwalin snorted once more.

"Well, my dear" Balin patted my shoulder. "It's exactly what we're going to try to have."

I felt my frown deepen. Oh, sure it was entirely logical to try and obtain the best deal possible for us, but it appeared a bit extreme to me. Would the men really be that stupid? Maybe they didn't know how much dwarves could eat? And if we had a permanent shop, then all the better for our sales, but would the town's folk be able to actually profit from this? Would they even buy our products in this shop? If they were mere peasants, what need would they have for Bofur's and Bifur's lovely carved plates? Would they even have the money to buy it?

Looking at my guardian I furrowed my brows, it didn't feel like Balin cared much about all that.

* * *

><p>That evening we decided to camp in a small area that was almost clear from snow; we had to leave the path to find it though. In this part of the mountain, pine trees were starting to grow sparingly and little by little the vegetations was turning into a dense forest; though we were still far from this part. Still, the trees were numerous enough to provide with a little protection and under their canopy, there was less snow.<p>

When we stopped, Hràr and Péri started to gather dry wood to light a fire while Dwalin disappeared. I was starting to wonder where he was when I saw from the corner of my eyes that he had reappeared and was walking to me.

At that time, I was sitting a bit away from Hràr and Péri, my back leaning against a trunk, and I had taken Ori's gift out of my bag. Balin had smiled when he had seen me starting to write on the notebook but hadn't commented on it. In truth there wasn't much to write and I had never been one to keep a journal or anything like this. Still, it did occupy my mind to describe the landscape and the day. I even decided to write what I thought of Hràr and Péri; I had found out months ago that dwarves couldn't read English, even though we spoke the same language, that they called Westron, it appeared that the alphabet I was using differed completely from the one found around here.

It hadn't bothered me too much, Ori would read with me usually, translating when the book was written in runes, and it allowed the both of us to spend time together easily. At that moment I wondered what he was doing. We had been looking through a book of old legends this past week and we had reached the middle of the old tome already, would he wait for me before reading the rest of it?

I was clearly not paying attention to what was going on around me and this was certainly part of the reason why I jolted so violently when I felt something being thrown on my lap.

In a matter of seconds I had jumped back on my feet and stared at the thing that had hit me.

It was a bunny.

A cute white furred bunny.

A cute white furred and hurt bunny.

I quickly kneeled next to the animal whose left hind leg was broken. The poor creature was probably in a state of shock because it didn't move but I could see its little furry chest moving. Maybe I could save him?

"It's still alive." I said aloud absentmindedly.

"Oh."

I looked up at that, I truly hadn't realized that Dwalin was in front of me until he said that only word. I blinked and saw him crouched in front of me. He extended one of his large hands toward the bunny and I asked myself whether such a strong dwarf could really care about a wild bunny's health. I truly didn't think anything of it when I saw him take the animal.

And then I couldn't help but squeak loudly when Dwalin broke the bunny's neck.

All the dwarves looked at me while I looked at the now dead bunny.

To my utter shame I felt my lower lip quiver slightly and I promptly bit it to stop the movement. I looked up from the animal to Dwalin who was eyeing me with a frown on his face. Then I turned my gaze towards Balin who was clearly a bit more concerned about my apparently strange reaction.

"Now you can cook it." Dwalin grunted before leaving the camp again.

I looked at the dead animal and then at Balin.

"Are you alright my dear?" The sweet old dwarf asked me and I felt a small lump in my throat.

"The bunny…"

"Yes?"

"He's dead…"

"Yes…"

I shook my head. There was no way I would tell a dwarf that killing an animal in front of my eyes did bother me…a lot. Still, it wasn't the worst part of it all. Nope. After all, I had been ordered to cook dinner, and I had no idea how to skin the thing or prepare it.

* * *

><p>In the end Balin had to show me what to do with this first rabbit and the second one Dwalin brought after a short while. I had to excuse myself at some point though, it really wasn't something I enjoyed looking at and it took me several minutes to calm my revolting stomach. Still, it was something I had to learn; I wanted to be allowed outside the Halls and it was entirely logical, now that I thought about it, that I wouldn't be able to find already skinned and prepared meat in the wild. Skinning animals was obviously a skill I had no choice but to learn, never mind how it made me lost my appetite.<p>

After Balin did the first rabbit, I did my best to manage and repeat his movements on the second one. I felt pride, which seemed ridiculous, when I managed to actually force myself to skin the second one properly. Well Balin did have to help me, but in the end I felt like I had performed a small exploit.

That evening, I had to admit that the stew we prepared was tasty…and I forced myself to forget the small, cute bunny that at some point had still been alive on my lap.

* * *

><p>It took us two more days to arrive in the lovely town of Gorm…and when I said lovely, I actually meant dreadful.<p>

Still I couldn't find it in myself to care, Balin had told me we wouldn't stay long and were likely to be back in five or six days at most in Thorin's Halls.

After my first sight of this town, I simply couldn't wait to go back home.

When we entered the town that was our destination, I couldn't help but shiver and feel completely repelled by the sight and the smells around. I wasn't convinced that this could be called a town, not even a village actually. There were a bit more than a dozen small and low houses even though most looked like barns and sheds to me. Yep, this was a real charming place to live in if one liked dirt, mud, waste and anything that looked and smelt repulsive.

There was no pure and shining snow here to hide the misery, no, the snow was high in the mountains. Here mud coated everything. I couldn't understand how men could survive the smell and I really couldn't fathom why they would agree to live in such conditions. Was it so complicated to throw the wastes a bit further away from the streets and houses? The dwarves managed to do it, so why not the humans?

The area could have been charming too, with the mountains climbing high in the sky not too far from there and the seemingly endless forests around. The town was in the middle of small fields, but all around that I could only see the dark green of pine trees and here and there, some other leafless trees. There even was a seemingly old tree at the entrance of the village. It was riddled with mistletoes I noticed absentmindedly.

I couldn't appreciate the scenery though. There was a strange gloomy atmosphere in this town that made me uneasy quite quickly. I was just about to walk to Balin just to feel reassured by his presence when my companions reacted before I could do anything. Soon I was entirely surrounded by them, but instead of feeling suffocated by their closeness, I actually felt relieved. I was a tad surprised to see Hràr and Péri react apparently protectively towards me, but after all it was coherent with all their mumbles about women who should remain in the Halls' safety.

We slowly made our way through what I believed to be some sort of main street toward a larger place, an empty area I should say, in front of which stood a slightly bigger house, it had two stories whereas the others around didn't. I soon observed that the men around were looking at us strangely and I wondered whether they were looking at all of us or whether they had recognized me as a woman already.

Between Ori's large scarf that dissimulated the lower half of my face, the heavy coat that smoothed out my forms, my hood that hid my hair and the dwarves around me, it was doubtful that the town's men would realize I was a woman that soon. Glancing around I could see that I didn't receive anymore stares than my companions, which oddly reassured me, though it really shouldn't have.

I quickly noticed that some of the stares sent our way didn't look even remotely nice or curious. I would go so far as to say that they even looked rather hateful, some scared even.

It didn't bode well for us…

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><p><strong>AN: Thanks to everyone for reading/following/reviewing this story :) it warms my heart to know some people appreciate my 'work' **

**I'm sorry I didn't update earlier...but I wasn't really happy with this chapter and the next, so yesterday I decided to remodel/ rewrite the story starting with this chapter up to the chapter 24 ... This is the reason why i might only update earliest on Friday as well. I have a bit of a writer block, and I'm hoping the remodeling of those chapters will help me solve that.**

**For this chapter, I know some of you won't like that she's not going with the Ri brothers, but I promise there's a purpose in all that. Mostly Amelia needs to grow up a bit ^^**

**I hope you did enjoy it though.**

**Thanks again for your support! You are all amazing ^^**


	16. Dwarves and Diplomacy

**As usual, everything belongs to JRRTolkien, except for my OC and the plot.**

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><p>It had been almost a month already. Three awfully long weeks, filled with tedious talks and lots of disputes. I was tired and I missed home terribly. I wanted to see Dori, Nori and Ori again. I sighed deeply, looking at the stupid rainclouds that menaced to ruin my plan if rain actually started to fall.<p>

I was sitting on the windowsill in a small house that had been freely lent to us for the time of our stay, looking forlornly outside. I wanted to go back already. At some point during that month I had realized that in my heart, Thorin's Halls had really become my home. The frightening thing was that it had never felt so right to call a place home before. I was still missing my uncle and aunt, terribly so, but the pain of their absence was slowly being eased away by other, more cheerful, feelings. Guilt still riddled me to a certain extent, but I had come to terms with the fact I could actually have a life, a real, full life here.

I had come to see these strange men, these dwarves, as family and dear friends. It was astounding how easily these short, moody, stubborn and hairy persons could just get under your skin and make a warm spot for themselves in your heart.

Bloody dwarves.

Bloody, stupid, annoying and stubborn dwarves.

Sure I was kind of happy, if surprised, to have realized how much they meant to me. But I really wished I hadn't found that out in such a way.

I groaned loudly and banged my head against the wooden wall. What was I supposed to do now? How will I get out of this mess I found myself in once more?

Bloody dwarves.

Well, I guess now was the time to prove I could have chosen a different career, though using my knowledge in such a way was making me sick at the simple thought of it. I clenched my teeth and squeezed my eyes shut, trying to ban old memories from my thoughts.

Calming slightly I sighed before letting my mind drift through the series of events that had brought me here, alone in this dark, empty room.

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><p>It was around midday when Dwalin, Balin, the two merchants and I entered the town.<p>

My hair and facial features were hidden by my scarf and purple hood. I loved that hood. Ori had given it to me just before we left, saying the colour was the same as their own hoods. I had quietly laughed at the fact that the brothers wore matching set of clothes but I had actually been overly happy in receiving such a present.

Right now though, I was thankful for the large hood simply because it allowed me to look around without it being too obvious. Even though this place was awful, I was curious about it. I started to glance around, not looking at the village itself but focusing on its inhabitants. I immediately noticed various things but the first thing that I could see was that these people looked exhausted. Their dirty unfriendly faces were pale, cheeks were hollow more often than not and I started to question their health.

Children were hidden away when we'd pass nearby but I still had enough time to notice some of them were unhealthily thin too. Their eyes didn't shine like children's eyes should and a strange feeling started to grow in my heart. The women didn't look much better though and even the men folk had this unhealthy complexion, really pale to the point they looked greyish. I could see the movements were sluggish and exuded exhaustion. Other than that they looked like medieval peasants, wearing dirty, soiled and sometimes even ragged clothes. Still I wondered whether clearly poor people would want to trade anything with us.

Besides they didn't really seem like a trusting and welcoming lot.

Seeing us enter their town they scurried away, hiding behind the closed doors of their houses. When we arrived in front of the biggest house that was somehow located in the centre of this village, Dwalin and Balin went up the stairs, Balin asking me first to follow them and then remain in the middle of the stairs. Turning around I realized I was in a sort of small no-man's land. The two other dwarves had placed themselves behind me down the stairs and Dwalin and Balin were a few steps higher than me.

These men really outdid themselves to protect their women folks and wards.

Dwalin knocked so hard on the wooden door that I thought for a second that he would punch a hole in the middle of it.

No one answered.

Well we couldn't blame them. Dwalin would scare me too.

After a few more unsuccessful tries I cleared my throat and Balin turned towards me.

"Has it occurred to you my kind sirs…that you might scare those people?"

Dwalin scoffed and grunted an unintelligible answer while Balin frowned.

"Balin, please, would you mind if I were to go ask some of the other people around?" I gestured towards the houses where I could see people observe us from the shadows behind their dirty windows.

"I'm not sure it's such a good idea my dear." Balin hesitated.

"What do I risk?"

"To die." Dwalin answered bluntly and I shrugged.

"I don't think so. The people seem harmless enough. Besides you told me they are peasants, surely their first reaction to a human girl wouldn't to kill her. Let me try this." I insisted.

As they seemed to hesitate I huffed loudly and simply went down the stairs, passing next to Hràr who complained about my behaviour. I ignored completely their comments and simply walked back towards the town's entrance. I could remember a woman and three children hiding in one of the houses there.

Gingerly I stepped in front of the door and knocked lightly on it, removing my hood to let the town's folk see the upper side of my face easily. I could hear a small whimper and a few gasps from the other side of the old, wooden door, and then hushed voices that somehow seemed upset.

Alright, something was definitely wrong around here.

I knocked some more and decided to let it be known without a doubt that I was a woman.

"Excuse me ma'am, my friends and I aren't looking for trouble. We're just here to talk."

I had to wait quite a bit before a shaky voice asked through the wooden panel.

"What do you want to talk about?" This undoubtedly was the woman who talked.

"Ma'am, why don't you open the door? I'm a healer, my companions are merchants who wish to set trading routes. You have nothing to be afraid of." I forced my voice to keep a steady and calm tone.

Several minutes of pleas on my part later, the stubborn woman finally opened her door. Seriously how could they be so scared about five people? Even though they weren't warriors, they still outnumbered us. It didn't make much sense to me that they would react so strongly to five strangers. It wasn't as if we were coming in with threatening looks either, well sure Dwalin wasn't really a cheerful sight, but still. My thoughts stopped though when I could finally have a good look at the woman. I didn't wish to be mean, but she looked terrible, frightened and skinny, so skinny.

"What is going on in that town?' I whispered without realizing it.

She didn't seem to hear me, or in any way she didn't answer. She looked terrified by me, which was honestly preposterous. I probably was among the most harmless people around. I had just barely managed to skin my first rabbit a few days ago for god's sake. As she looked at me suspiciously I decided to talk to her, keeping my voice as soft as possible. I felt as if I was trying to deal with a frightened animal, which wasn't very complimentary for this woman.

"Ma'am, I really don't wish to disturb you, as I said, I'm only here with my companions to discuss trade agreements with the town's master."

"The master isn't here." She replied while narrowing her eyes at me.

"When will he be back?" I asked while trying hard to remain as polite as possible.

"You are with dwarves." She spat, though once more I couldn't discern real hate in her words, though they contained plenty of fear.

The fact that she would mention it now and in such a way surprised me greatly. I felt my eyebrows rose to my hairline and my eyes widened a bit. Still, I answered calmly.

"I am."

"Dwarves…" She repeated and this time I could see she appeared disgusted. "You shouldn't stay here. Go away. There's nothing for you in this town!" She shouted those last sentences towards the dwarves who had walked closer to us.

"We would really wish to speak with the town's master first." I tried to calm her. "We believe some interesting trades could be made between our communities."

"We don't want anything to do with dwarves!" She spat while walking slightly outside her house. I took a step back while she snarled. "We don't have anything for you thieves! Leave us alone!"

Well, that was interesting. Why would she call us thieves? Had Nori come around here? Somehow I doubted it. Still, I kept this information in the corner of my mind and tried to calm her by keeping my voice kind and soft.

"We're just here to try and discuss about ways we could help each other. We only have the best interest of both our communities in mind." Well, I wasn't lying per se…was I?

That seemed to make her stop in her rant and she observed me suspiciously. Meanwhile people were slowly starting to open their doors and some of them were even stepping outside, slowly coming closer. My eyes slightly widened at the sight of few of them holding pitch forks and other similar objects. Were these guys planning to fight the dwarves with such tools? Seriously? Hadn't they seen Dwalin's battleaxes? Well, that'd be some fun fight to witness I guessed…

The next person to speak wasn't the woman next to me but a man, slightly younger than the others, he was probably my age or at least not much older.

"What do you want?" He all but growled.

"As I said, we just want to discuss with you all. Balin, could you?" I gestured to him to relay me.

"Sure, sure. Hmm, we came to review and discuss contracts, trade agreements and the likes."

"I don't believe you. You want to steal from us, you're dwarves! You're not reliable!"

At that my attention entirely focused on that second man who had just spoken while the dwarves reacted poorly at the insult. It was clear that people around had some pretty bad opinion of dwarves in general, though I had no idea where such preconceptions came from. It took us at least an hour, if not more to calm everyone down. And when I say 'us' I mean Balin and me. Dwalin, Hràr and Péri really didn't take well being insulted. They had no qualms in voicing their anger loudly, shouting strongly back at all the yells and stupid accusations send our way. By the time everyone put their weapons down and calmed a little, my throat was hoarse from all the yelling I did simply in order to be heard.

The young man, Hector he was called, appeared to be some kind of leader here while the master was out of town. Apparently he was supposed to be coming back in a short while, maybe a few days. Hector and the other men begrudgingly offered us to stay in an unoccupied house as the night was starting to fall. I sighed at the sight of all those glares exchanged between the two groups and I wondered how we would ever be able to come to any kind of agreement with them. Suddenly I felt as if I wouldn't see Thorin's Halls in quite awhile.

I was really tired that night, but I really felt I needed to talk with the dwarves, we all agreed on that at least.

I was sitting close to the small hearth, trying to catch some warmth from the pitiful fire we had been able to build. This wasn't a house, it was a shack and its previous owner had apparently died recently; it made me shiver just to think about it. There was just that one room and no furniture whatsoever. It was really not a place I'd call a house, much less a home, but at least it had a hearth and a roof. We would just have to camp inside, which was still better than outside.

Balin was the first to speak that night.

"These people are on edge. We'll have to tread carefully tomorrow."

The other nodded and I added.

"They don't trust us; they don't trust anyone outside of their town. This woman was truly frightened by you all. She really seems scared of dwarves." I thought aloud, and then I asked Balin. "Do men usually react like that? It was…quite surprising for me."

At that I could see the four of them tense visibly. Dwalin frowned deeply and grunted, which wasn't an unusual reaction for him, but I still felt that he was angry. Hràr and Péri didn't answer to me, but then again we barely spoke anyway. In the end, it was unsurprisingly Balin who answered, his small smile absent of his face.

"Well, men and dwarves have strained relations at best. There are quite a lot of weird beliefs that men have about us."

"Weird beliefs?"

"You heard some of them today. Thieves, monsters… because we leave apart from them and in the mountains, they think we are some kind of dark creatures." Balin shook his head while the three others growled.

"But you trade with them often…and without the dwarves, surely they would have less jewellery, precious stones and metals? Wouldn't they?" It seemed to me that the dwarves were doing the dirty jobs, but then again, I wasn't entirely impartial.

"That's part of the reason why they hate us." Dwalin added and I had to turn once more to Balin for more details.

"They think we hide riches in our mountains' fortresses. They think we are driven by our greed. Some of them remember the dragon and Erebor too."

At that last sentence, Balin's voice had become really low and he was staring at the fire, as if remembering the events. It hit me then, Balin probably knew Erebor. He probably witnessed the attack of the dragon. I felt bad for having reminded him of this but there wasn't anything I could do now.

"Well, I'm sure they'll see reason once we start to discuss with them."

My optimism didn't help lift the mood and all my companions remained silent for the rest of the evening. This whole mission really didn't start well.

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><p>A week and a half later my head was pounding from all the yelling I had witnessed. We had left Thorin's Halls two weeks ago and I was starting to wonder when we'd be able to go back. The town's Master had arrived two days after us, two days we had spent more or less secluded in the house. And right after the Master had arrived, discussion had started and my ears had started to ring because of all the shouts. To put it simply, the men didn't want dwarves in their towns but were really interested by the prospects of new tools. The master for his part clearly wanted shiny little items for himself but didn't want to pay the price we asked. What a disgustingly greedy man…<p>

All in all these men simply weren't as stupid as the dwarves had thought and they wanted everything without giving anything back.

But worst than all those talks was the way the men behaved. The master never wanted to meet with us before well after lunch, forcing us to either remain in the confine of the small house or face the town's folks fear and distrust. And in the few rare times he did meet with us in the morning, he was just ignoring the dwarves completely, letting his advisors do the talking…or yelling. In the afternoon he would sometimes stand and leave the room, uncaring of how rude he was being and clearly perversely happy to anger the dwarves.

It sickened me.

The dwarves were impressive though. They managed to remain patient and didn't outright behead the master. Dwalin would rant and growl in our house, just like Hràr and Péri would, while Balin would mumble under his breath. They were all deeply offended and I couldn't find any fault in that. Even I was starting to be royally annoyed by the master's behaviour.

I was proud to see the dwarves trying hard to rein on their anger. Even though they did yell and shout loudly during the 'discussions' they were still remaining rather polite. They countered each time the men were complaining about the prices we asked, saying that they wouldn't sell their products for anything less than their actual values. I could only agree with them on that, the men wanted to buy our items for half the price we asked at most. And obviously no agreement could be reached as long as they refused to at least offer lodging to passing dwarves, which greatly annoyed Balin who had actually come mostly for this part of the agreement. The men simply didn't even want to hear anything about this.

As he had told me, we didn't really come all the way down here just to sell a few pitch forks and hammers. The dwarves wanted free access to this town; it would really help the caravans going south to have a safe place to stop for a night.

Obviously with all the shouts taking part on the simple topic of tools' prices, the other points had barely been discussed at all. It was just sterile arguments and they were all grating on my nerves.

Well it had to be admitted though, that it was quite impressive to see these men were just as stubborn as the dwarves on certain matters.

I sighed.

Other issues bothered our little group too. Mostly the fact that the men refused to provide, even sell, food to us while our provisions were diminishing quickly. We barely had enough for one more meal, maybe two if the dwarves rationed themselves and the men had shouted bloody murder the one and only time Dwalin had thought about going on a short hunting trip in the nearby forest.

It was past ridiculous.

At first Balin, and even the three others, had thought that my being a woman and a healer would help us in our talks. They thoughts the men would naturally trust me more. Well they didn't. I couldn't approach the town's people who feared all of us really. Besides being a woman made it so that no one really listened to me when I was trying to calm everyone down. Only Balin, and to a certain extent that young man, Hector, would from time to time listen to my words. But Hector couldn't take much part in the discussions; the master was really the only one who could say anything and from what I could see, he didn't appreciate Hector much. The young man was only allowed in our talks because he was trusted by the people, not the master.

The town master was an old and fat man. One look at him had made my skin crawl at first; his grey hair were greasy, his eyes yellowy, he had this awful habit to spit on the floor and all in all looked like an horrible oversized and deformed boar. He was greedy to an unimaginable point too and wanted us to respect him just because he was the town master. That didn't really please my companions who had taken to despise him almost immediately.

And this obviously didn't help the negotiations.

At some point though I did ask Balin why we just didn't leave. Of course I knew we needed to find an agreement with the master, but surely the other dwarves would start to worry. What would we do if a group of them came barrelling into town, weapons drawn and shouting in Khuzdul?

Balin had laughed and the other snorted. Apparently I was being too paranoid. Nothing would happen, Balin repeated. And if dwarves did come, then anyway what problem could it cause?

Well I wasn't convinced with such arguments and I told Balin so.

Men around were suspicious of us already and had no trust whatsoever in dwarves. Surely the fact a group of them invaded their territory wouldn't be appreciated. And who knew how scared men would react? After all, weren't actions derived from fear among the most unpredictable ones?

But obviously no one listened to me and I was left worrying on my own, cursing at their stubbornness and their lack of common sense.

And here I was, almost two weeks had passed since we entered this town, soon it'd be three weeks since we left Thorin's Halls and I was simply certain that Dori, Nori and Ori would be really annoyed and worried by now. Maybe they would actually chain me to keep me in their care when I'd go back…

Nah…they wouldn't dare…would they?

Thinking about him made me feel slightly better so I let my mind drift away from my problems. It wouldn't hurt to wait a bit any way; the night was still too young for me to act safely. I absentmindedly took a small piece of bread from the nearby table, munching on it without appetite. It was tasteless but it did remind me of a particularly fun time I had with Dori, back in Thorin's Halls.

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><p>It was early in the afternoon when I entered the kitchen. Nori was still rather weak after having been hurt and I consistently insisted that he rested in his room. I had left him alone so that he could sleep, and he had agreed to do so grumpily. Even he had to admit that he was still easily tired, though for the past few days he had been able to stand and walk to the kitchen once or twice a day.<p>

When I pushed the door I saw Dori come in from the other side.

"Hello Amelia. How is Nori?"

I smiled at him. Even though he had seen Nori just a few hours ago, Dori couldn't help but worry and endlessly asked me how his little brother was doing.

"He's fine. Grumpy but fine. He's asleep now." I answered after adding under my breath. "Hopefully he is at least."

"Good, good." Dori was holding several packages and put them all down on the table while I came closer, curious about their contents.

"What's in it?" I asked while poking at several packages.

"Food." Dori smiled at me. "Well, mostly. I've been down to the men's town and I brought back some freshly hunted meat. Some furs and leather too. And flour."

"Flour?"

"Aye, I wanted to bake some bread today." Dori said while unpacking the items.

"You know how to make bread?" I asked, sincerely surprised.

Dori laughed heartily and patted my shoulder before answering.

"Of course, almost everyone knows how! But our family's recipe is very good and I know Nori is fond of it."

He needed not say more. Sweet and caring Dori wanted to support and help his little brother in any way he could. It was such a simple and sweet gesture. I couldn't help but beam at my guardian, oddly wondering how I could have been so lucky to end up in his and his brothers' care. I almost bounced on the spot while I asked, feeling like I was a small child once more.

"Please, oh please can you teach me how to do it?"

Dori smiled widely at me and nodded, apparently happy to share his knowledge in baking bread with me. I felt strangely proud that he would allow me to know their family's secret bread recipe too.

Baking with Dori was amazing. He would laugh of my mistake and was extremely patient. We spent the whole afternoon together, and by the end of it, when Ori came back and Nori woke up, both Dori and myself were covered in flour. The kitchen wasn't faring much better and all in all the cleaning would take ages. But the four of us didn't care because the bread tasted amazingly sweet and smooth. Dori smiled at me fondly, smiling. We had had a great time together. Ori had been pleasantly surprised by the warm bread waiting for him and the smell had awoken Nori.

At that time I couldn't care less about the cleaning I'd have to do later. Nori was smiling happily as he took large bites of the warm and freshly baked bread. Just seeing him like this warmed my heart. Yes, this simple sight was worth all the troubles and much more.

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><p>I sighed, coming back to the present. I glanced around, disheartened at the sight of the empty and silent room. Just the day before Balin, Dwalin, Hràr and Péri were still here with me. Three weeks ago we had left Thorin's Halls, hoping to be back in just about a week time. Now here I was, alone and scheming in the night. Looking again at the sky I wondered if I should wait some more or not before acting. Grumpily I stood up and stretched, thinking about the events that had finally allowed me to gain some fragile trust from the peasants before everything went downhill.<p>

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><p>It was several days ago, in the morning I decided not to join the men in their discussion, or rather dispute. I silently observed the life in the village. It was both interesting and weird to see how these people lived. They were peasants, farmers and hunters. Their life here seemed quite hard and they lacked the simplest things. I had been surprised for example not to spot any well or river around.<p>

It was Balin who had explained that this area was usually quite rainy, and the soil was clayish, in such circumstances digging a well would be more dangerous and pointless than really useful. Thus the people around collected rain water in small cisterns near their houses. I had counted six of those water tanks and had been astounded to hear that they were sufficient for the men's needs.

That morning, no one talked with me when I walked around in the village curious to see how the people actually lived, but I could tell they were observing me. I was bored out of my mind. It was past midday and I was sitting on the floor after having finished my stroll around town, leaning my back against our house's wall, when I heard shouts that didn't come from the place where the men were 'talking'. I frowned and jumped to my feet. Following the screams to one barn at the outskirts of town, I found a group of people kneeling around a young boy.

"Move!" I snapped to the men who were crowding him.

I probably shocked them enough with my tone because they moved out of my way, eyes wide. I quickly kneeled near the boy. His eyes were closed and blood was already pooling behind his head. I frowned and try to assert cautiously whether he had an injury on his neck or not. Then I gingerly palpated his scalp while calling to the people around.

"What happened?"

None of them answered.

"What are you doing to my son?" A woman screeched while coming closer and I recognized her as the first person who had dared open her door almost two weeks ago.

"I told you, I'm a healer." I said as calmly as possible. "So someone better answer my questions. And it'd be a good idea to go call one of my companions so that he can bring me my bag." The injury was bleeding profusely but it didn't surprise me as it was on the back of its head.

"You're one of them, you'll kill my son!"

I could hear some other people around starting to mumble and I really didn't think it would help this child if everyone argued about stupid prejudices concerning dwarves. I took a deep breath and looked behind my shoulder where the mother was standing, obviously hesitating between yanking me away from her child and not touching me.

"Oh, bloody hell woman. If you want me to let the boy die continue like this." I snapped before talking in a calmer voice. "Now, if you want me to heal him, go explain what happened to my companion called Balin."

I hadn't named Balin for nothing. My guardian didn't look as dangerous or fierce as the others, though I was certain this look was deceptive. At my tone, the mother seemed to hesitate only for a short while before rushing back in town. The people around were eyeing me suspiciously but a few of them seemed slightly hopeful. I asked once more what had happened and finally got my answer when a young boy spoke.

"We were playing and he stumbled. He didn't move after he fell."

That wasn't really helpful.

"Alright. I need to have a closer look at his wound. Can you find two pieces of wood, approximately this size..." I gestured to the boy's neck. "…and some linen too."

I was happy to see them obey at once this time and two children scurried away looking for what I wanted. One of the most suspicious men groaned.

"Why do you want pieces of wood?"

I barely stopped myself before I rolled my eyes. What did he expect me to do with them? Strangle the boy?

"To make sure his neck doesn't move when I'll turn him to check the back of his head. I don't think he hurts it, but I don't want to take any risk for now." I answered matter-of-factly.

"What if did hurt his neck? He'll heal just fine." A second man snarled and this time I almost snorted.

"Sure." I replied coolly. "And if he did hurt it and you make him move in a bad way, you might just snap it completely killing him at the same time. Now, if you break it and he still manages to survive just fine, then he would forever remain unable to move. So what do you think? Shall we wait? Hmm?"

I quirked an eyebrow at the man who opened his mouth and closed it several times in a row.

"That's what I thought. Now move away all of you. No need to crowd the poor child."

Approximately at that time Balin arrived, unsurprisingly followed by all the other dwarves. I couldn't help but smirk at the sight. I had the feeling that most dwarves were really big softies hiding under tons of gruffness and grumpiness and they didn't like the thought of a child hurting; it didn't matter that it was a human child.

I quickly explained Balin what had happened and what I needed. Balin, being a dwarf, had expertly managed to craft a sort of neck brace. I was impressed he was able to improvise that so quickly and with so little instructions as to what I wanted. Dwarves were actually quite handy to know. Then with his help, I refused anyone else's, I quickly bandaged the boy's head and finished to check his neck.

The boy had been fairly lucky really; he'd only have a bump, a small scar on the scalp and a massive headache. He regained consciousness a bit later and, though he seemed a bit lost, he didn't seem to suffer from any trauma.

I too had been incredibly lucky to have witnessed this event and helped heal the boy. As soon as he was back on his feet, which is the following day, the people in town looked at me gratefully.

One day after the events the town's people shared with us what little provisions they had left.

Two more days later the discussions were finally starting to go somewhere and the level of shouting had greatly diminished. The master was still as rude as ever, but he begrudgingly agreed that we might be useful sometimes. Among his advisors was the young boy's father; obviously it helped. I started to hope we'll soon leave this place and go back to Thorin's Halls.

I started to daydream about the homecoming party I was certain would occur when I'll be back home.

A giddy feeling grew in my chest when I thought about Thorin's Halls as my home. It felt so right too. I couldn't help a small smile to tug on my lips.

I wondered whether Ori had finished the book or whether he had waited for me. I missed our peaceful time together in the evenings. I really wanted to be back in our home; Dori and Nori would be close by, smoking or drinking some ale while Ori would softly read me stories. Or maybe I'll tell them what happened here, how awkward it was at first and how much I got used to Dwalin's, Hràr's and Péri's grunts. It was a language on its own, really.

I couldn't wait to see their faces when I'll tell them that the only food the people had shared with us consisted of vegetables and cheese. Dwalin's face had been memorable.

I chuckled just thinking about it. Dwalin had looked so lost, so utterly confounded by his plate of cabbage. I swear he even looked around his plate, wondering aloud where we had put the meat. Balin had simply shaken his head from side to side in disbelief.

"Where's the meat, lass? Didn't you cook the meat?" He had asked me gruffly.

"There was no meat to cook Dwalin." I tried to smile to sooth him.

"No meat? No meat?! What kind of habit is that, to eat green stuffs without meat?!" He groaned and complained.

"Dwalin, you should already be happy that I'm not cooking my favourite recipes." At that they had all looked at me questioningly.

"Why is that lass?" Balin had finally asked.

"Ask Ori about it." I replied with a toothy grin.

At the time I thought that everything would be alright and that we'll soon be on our way back to the Halls. I had good hopes then that the discussions would come to an end soon, probably in a day or two.

As I was alone that evening, the dwarves already sleeping in the far corner of the room, I started at the dying fire in the hearth and thought about how lucky we had been. Sure we had remained here for far longer than we expected, but my fears had been unfounded; no dwarves had barrelled into town with weapons in hands. Surely nothing could go bad now that we finally started to talk about a possible agreement with the men.

After I had 'saved' a town's boy, I had received a separate status than my companions. Apparently I was now someone to be trusted. It mostly meant that whenever I told everyone to shut up during the arguments, they would. More or less. Alright the dwarves barely cared and the men really stopped talking for just a few minutes but still, compared to their endless shouts it was a feat to achieve that level of peacefulness.

Well at least they were all still talking and I was trying my best to make everyone compromise. I had ended at the position of mediator and I truly had no idea how or why. Even the disgusting master was listening to me from time to time.

And after another full day of yell, my patience finally snapped.

"Seriously all of you stop!" I ended up screeching.

I had healed the boy four days ago, we had left Thorin's Halls three weeks ago and my head was pounding due to all the yells. My nerves simply couldn't take anymore fruitless arguments.

I sighed when I heard all the men around slowly stopping their talks. I had closed my eyes, and was massaging my temples with my fingers, trying to ease the pain in my head. When I finally decided to look up, I saw all their eyes on me. Some looked sheepish, some looked concerned and the others were just clearly surprised by my little outburst.

"Don't tell me you all haven't realized yet that this..." I gestured towards all of us. "Is not going anywhere… Besides you all enjoy listening to your own voices way too much."

"Hem, lady…" One of the men tried to interrupt me.

"No. Don't say anything. Starting from now, you all listen!" I hissed.

"Listen Missy…" The master started, pointing a finger at me, but I ignored him.

"Lass…"

"No Balin! I'm happy I followed you here but I certainly didn't come along to witness this circus show. So from now on, you all shut it and I'm the one talking."

To say they were flabbergasted would be quite right, though not entirely because I could see Dwalin appraising me with an approving glint in his eyes and Balin was clearly proud. Hràr was apparently finding something highly amusing which shocked me, for he usually didn't seem to appreciate anything. When I said dwarves were weird, I meant it. Talk back at them, force them somehow to shut up and they would believe you to be wonderful. Still, I didn't ponder on those thoughts, I was way too tired for these sorts of pointless banter and my outburst was clearly fuelled by my exasperation at their behaviours.

"So... To recapitulate and no I don't need help remembering what everyone in this room repeated endlessly for the past, what? I think it's almost been two weeks now. Anyway. The main issue here is that the dwarves can and are willing to sell high quality products to you all. Those items would be far better than any you own and would probably last longer too. Right?"

Everyone nodded, the dwarves eagerly while sending glares to the men who nodded too if less enthusiastically. The master especially looked as if he had been forced to eat a lemon. I continued my speech unperturbed though.

"The fact that you refuse to pay for the price asked I gather is understandable." At that, the dwarves frowned while the men looked smug. "But your propositions are simply ridiculous. Where it men selling you such fine quality items, you'd pay the price asked without questions. If you want the tools, pay for it, otherwise let's move on."

I saw the dwarves starting to look smug now but I didn't wait to hear the town's men complaints.

"Now. You say, you can't pay. Alright but what services then can you provide in exchange? If the men cannot pay then you could do something for us for free. Balin, if the men assured us we could be safely received here and provided with free lodging and food each time a dwarf from Thorin's Halls would stop by, would that be a fair compromise for the payment of some tools?"

The white bearded dwarf seemed to ponder on this option before glancing at the others and finally nodding.

"Details should be discussed but that could be an amenable solution. However it wouldn't be the same quantities of tools."

"Alright. What about you? Would such a solution be agreeable to you too?"

The men clearly weren't happy about it and the master simply glared at me. They would probably discuss this idea more in depth later on when we wouldn't hear them. Still they couldn't protest too loudly because it was the first time the dwarves didn't bluntly refuse.

"It might be an amenable option to us too."

Seriously what was so complicated about agreeing with that? Why, oh why had they spent weeks without listening to each other? Well, if I were honest I would say it was mostly the master's fault. He just didn't want to agree with anything the dwarves would say and had a clear antagonistic approach when he came in the room. But my new found friendly status had forced his hand. He had no choice but to listen to me just like his men did. Had I thought about it four days ago, I would have put a stop to those stupid banters earlier.

I slowly breathed out. Hopefully things would move on a bit more quickly from now on. No one felt like discussing it directly though and apparently everyone wanted to think separately about it.

The men all stood up and left the room, leaving me alone with the dwarves. I suddenly lost all the boldness and wit I had displayed a few minutes earlier. I swallowed thickly and waited for the Guillotine to fall on my neck, or Dwalin's axe in that instance.

Dwalin stood up, followed by the two merchants and finally Balin. While Dwalin and Hràr, went past me, they grunted, which made me raise one eyebrow; this sounded like a thankful grunt, yes there seemed to be thankful grunts in their… vocabulary. Péri winked at me and smirked before he followed the other two outside. I was puzzled by their actions until Balin patted my back reassuringly.

"You did well lass. I'm proud of my ward."

I blushed and smiled softly at him. It was weird how incredibly happy those few words had made me.

A giddy sensation made my skin prickle and I couldn't resist hugging Balin. He chuckled softly and patted my back some more.

Later that night I pondered on this. In my world I had failed lamely and disappointed my family. Here it appeared I was odd, incomprehensible sometimes and probably perceived as demented because of my quirks and my love of fruits and vegetables, but still. Balin was proud of me. Balin, one of my guardians, the King's counsellor and friend, was proud of me.

That thought made me feel incredibly happy.

The following day went on surprisingly smoothly. The master and his men were finally conceding some points and the dwarves had finally understood that diplomatic solutions required for them to at least think about making some compromises.

I would have thought they knew that already, what with all the contracts they already have. But apparently these men were really more hostile than usual, their prejudices about dwarves stronger than in other towns, thus putting the dwarves on edge. Their natural answer to hostility being hostility, it wasn't a mystery really that the talks so far had so little results.

But at the moment I truly couldn't care less about it all.

Nope, my mind was in Thorin's Halls. Oh, I could already see myself back home with Dori, Nori and Ori.

I just couldn't wait.

And then obviously something happened. My life was a joke. Problems seemed to pop out of nowhere every time things started to look good for me.

This time the problem popped out in the form of a group of grumpy, snarling dwarves.

Seeing Bofur, Bifur and some others I didn't know being brought in the centre of the village forcibly was not a sight I relish seeing again. Not at all. Not ever. They were all complaining, shouting already at the men who were using pitch forks, axes and other tools to force them to walk.

Pitch forks! I didn't know whether to laugh or cry at that sight.

I knew something bad was bound to happen. We couldn't be almost two weeks late and not expect the dwarves still in Thorin's Halls to react. We should have sent a message, anything to let them know we were fine. I had been right, what a surprise…maybe irony was not supposed to be used at that moment, but well, who cared anyway?

Looking at the dwarves being brought in front of us, it was easy to see they were a sort of rescue party. Though how they had been caught was a mystery to me.

"Let us go immediately!" One of the dwarves shouted.

"What's the meaning of this?!" Dwalin yelled in his deep and gruff voice.

"What's the meaning of this? You dare ask us that question dwarf?" The man spat, his voice full of hatred and mistrust. "You're the ones who hid in the woods. They were preparing to attack us. Look at all their weapons."

At that one of the other men threw swords, axes, mattocks and hammers on the ground. They clanked loudly and I guessed that the dwarves had been camping in the woods, planning on going in town either that night or tomorrow morning. While I thought about this, Bofur tried to sooth the men.

"We didn't hide in the…"

"You were planning to attack us! Why would you carry so many weapons? Why would you camp not a mile away from town?"

"Dwarves always carry weapons when they travel, like everyone else does." I tried to calm everyone to no avail.

"They were planning to attack us!" A woman stupidly screeched.

"What?! You're the ones who attacked them first!" Dwalin bellowed, though his words probably had no effects on the men.

"So those talks were just a plan to gain time?"

This was seriously becoming ridiculous. Why would these men react so strongly about that? I could understand they'd be upset but still, it wasn't necessary to shout bloody murder.

"They're dwarves! They only think about themselves and they'll steal all we have before leaving!"

"They'll murder us and kidnap our children to work in their mines!"

Well apparently I was wrong. Were those stupid ideas actual rumours and prejudices about dwarves? I hadn't heard them yet and really hoped never to hear something so preposterous ever again.

All the dwarves were now shouting as loudly as the crowd was and I could already see they were about to snap and attack everyone in sight. I couldn't really blame them; the insults sent their way were pretty ridiculous and downright awful. I reacted quickly though, grabbing Balin's forearm while he was shouting at some woman that no, dwarves didn't enslave humans in their mines.

"Balin!" I breathed out. "We need to calm down everyone. Fighting them will not solve anything!"

Thankfully the old dwarf nodded his agreement and quickly shouted a word in Khuzdul that no one around understood, except for the dwarves of course. The men though were still freaking out.

"Let's lock them up in the cellars!"

"Yes! They're dangerous!" "We can't trust them!" "They're beasts!" "They're monsters!"

My eyes were wide with disbelief and fear. I saw the dwarves starting to struggle when Balin ordered them something else in Khuzdul which I could only guess was something like 'don't resist lads.' I did try to intervene though.

"Wait. There's no need for that." I should have remained quiet because my intervention just brought things to a head.

"Look at her! She's obviously human, she's been kidnapped too!" "We need to save her." "Poor girl forced to work for them!"

I didn't like being pitied. And I especially hated being pitied when there truly was no reason for such sentiments. The dwarves were astounded. I was so flabbergasted that I lost my voice, staring at them all with my mouth hanging open.

In a matter of ten, maybe fifteen minutes, all the dwarves had been gathered and lead like cattle into the master's house. Meanwhile I was being perceived as a poor, helpless victim. Awesome…

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><p>And now here I was, three weeks after peacefully starting a harmless journey, sitting next to the windowsill at night, contemplating what to do next. To be truthful I already had a plan but I hated it and to say I was hesitating would be an understatement.<p>

I had spent the whole afternoon and evening trying to rationalize with the town's men but they had put it in their head that I was some victims that suffered some Stockholm Syndrome. Obviously they didn't put it in such terms but well the meaning was the same. Anyway the problem remained. I was still in the dingy house where I had previously stayed with the dwarves, and they were all chained, or at least bound, in a cellar that was in the town's master's house.

From what I had understood, there even were various men guarding the prisoners. I had no hope of freeing them using force, not that I had planned on using what little muscles I had. No, I would have to use my wit.

So there I sat at night, a healer planning to do something terrible, a healer with only one idea left to free her friends. I closed my eyes.

I could only hope my plan would work smoothly…

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><p><strong>AN: I really wanted to thank Mary who faithfully reviews my chapters :) Even though I can't PM you, I want to tell you how happy I am each time I read one of your review! so many thanks**

**Thanks as well to everyone who reads/reviews/follows or adds this story in his/her favorites. It's really nice of you all to follow this little monster of a story.**

**I really hope this chapter wasn't too terrible to read. I had trouble editing it and I'm not sure all the time skips were easy enough to follow. I'm a bit late for the update too because I wanted to add some light scenes (the one with Dori, and Dwalin eating) **

**I do hope the men's reactions isn't to unbelievable but I think that racism in ME could potentially be strong, especially against dwarves who are very secretive and suspicious of others. **

**I'm still struggling with the rewriting of the next chapters, so I'm really sorry if the updates slowed down. **

**Next update will hopefully be Monday, latest Tuesday (French time, sorry for those of you who always end up with the chapter one day later...)**


	17. A Healer's Negotiation

**Everything belongs to JRR Tolkien, except for my OC and the plot**

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><p>The dwarves had been locked up a several hours ago. The night was now pitch black and I had finally decided to leave the relative safety of the little house I was residing in. At the moment, all I could think about was how I wished the three brothers were here. I could easily picture Dori, standing close by, maybe even just next to me. He would try his best to protect me, to avoid me being hurt. Ori for his part would try to support me in any way he could.<p>

And Nori…

Nori would be furious. He wouldn't want me to do anything besides run away to get help. He wouldn't want me to get hurt in any way.

I felt a shiver run down my spine while a single tear rolled on my cheek. How I wished Nori was here. He'd find a way to sneak in and save everyone; he was a thief after all, wasn't he? I didn't know whether he was a good one, but surely he would be able to find a better plan than mine.

Yes, I wished he was here. I wanted him to hold me. I wanted him to give me strength.

But I was alone while I silently made my way to the town's entrance, walking close to walls and crouching at the sight of windows or at any suspicious noise. At some point I was reminded of all those action and spy movies I had watched in my previous world, it seemed so long ago. I didn't ponder on such thoughts for long; I had to focus on my plan. My target was an old tree with mistletoe infesting it.

To be honest I didn't trust the men around, and I was desperate. Their weird beliefs about dwarves could potentially lead them to ridiculous conclusions, the kind of which I didn't want to think about. Still I didn't believe the men would keep the dwarves locked forever and I doubted we'd be free to go as if nothing had happened. So what choices did these men have? When I had thought about this earlier I had realized that I might not have much time to act and that I really should do something to help my friends.

In the end it was up to me to come up with a plan to free all those stubborn dwarves from those stupid and ignorant men.

Coming up with this solution hadn't been easy. And it certainly was far from an ideal plan.

I had been trying to speak in favour of the dwarves, inefficiently obviously seeing as they were still captives, when I had seen the tree. At first I had no idea what to do, while I tried to speak with the master when he was walking out of town. Then I had seen the tree and had remembered rather suddenly how my dog had been killed when I was but a child. He had died because he had eaten mistletoe that had fallen from a tree in our garden. The old tree of this town was entirely riddled with mistletoe, so it would be easy enough to climb and gather leaves and fruits. I believed it was an apple tree but I really wasn't good at recognizing tree varieties so I couldn't be sure. In any cases, I didn't care because my purpose for being here was not to find out what kind of tree that was.

I had finally arrived under the bare branches and I looked up, observing what I had come here to gather. With the quantity of mistletoe in that tree, I'll be able to collect quite a lot of leaves and berries without it being too easily noticeable by the people in town. Anyway they probably didn't really keep tabs on how much parasites infested their trees. Right? I seriously hoped so in any case.

Simply looking at the tree I felt the guilt in my chest reach new heights.

How could I even contemplate doing that?

How could I believe myself to be a healer if I intentionally planned to poison people?

Painful memories of my father and then of insults and newspaper articles were brought at the forefront of my mind. I shook my head quickly, now wasn't an appropriate time to think about this. I focused on my task once more, my mind still messed up with too many thoughts.

Of course I didn't intend to kill any of them but that didn't mean there wasn't any risk. It was highly possible that one of the children, even maybe an adult, would have a bad reaction to the plant's toxin and would die. What then? What should I do? Should I go on with that insane plan?

I bit my lower lip, the real question somehow was should I take the risk to wait and see what'll happen next? From what I knew of dwarves, they were not only extremely stubborn, but they were proud to an impossible extent and seemed to solve problems by wielding axes and hammers. Not really a good option here in my humble opinion.

Still, was I ready to throw all my beliefs and promises away just to save their asses…well and probably some of the peasants' lives too? I didn't care much per se about the villagers, but we came here to peacefully find agreements, not to let an angry Dwalin loose on the town's men.

I hated this plan. I really did.

If I took one step forward I'd probably have no right to call myself a healer. Not anymore. Simply because this step would in all probability force me to do things I abhorred and that were in contradiction with what a healer should do. I would never see myself in the same light either. It would just highlight how terrible a person I could easily become. How egoistical I could be, because if I were honest with myself, I'd admit I was doing it as much as I was doing it for the dwarves.

I didn't want to lose them. I didn't want to be alone here. I didn't want them to be hurt either.

Swearing under my breath I took that step and extended my arms to grab the closest branch. I heaved myself up with quite some difficulties. I probably should exercise more to keep fit, I thought with a grimace as my muscles protested.

Climbing the tree once I was up in its branches wasn't so difficult anymore. I found a spot where I didn't risk falling down if I let go of the tree bark, slowly picking up Nori's dagger from its sheath. Looking at it for a second I wondered whether Nori would have guessed I'd use it for pruning a tree. Little by little I cut and collected bits and pieces of mistletoes, being cautious not to take too much of it in the same places. I needed the people of town to keep trusting me and a visible amount of missing mistletoe might make them suspicious.

I quickly gathered a lot of leaves and berries in the empty leather bag I had with me.

I stayed in this damn tree for quite awhile and soon I started to grow anxious. What if someone saw me? What will I do? What will I say?

I bit my lip; I needed to focus, not to worry about things that hadn't happened yet and might never happen.

"Damn dwarves" I muttered to myself when I finally lowered myself and finally jumped back on the ground. I gathered quickly all the leaves, twigs and berries that had fallen on the floor that I could see in the darkness and put them in my emptied bag with the rest of my collect. Then I rushed back to the little house I lived in. Caution was still high on my list of priorities though, so I didn't simply dash back in even though I wanted nothing more than just do that.

I felt like some sort of spy and I guess I kind of was. Well more of an assassin than a spy actually. I grimaced some more. These dwarves would owe me a huge debt; I hoped they'd realized it. What I was planning to do for their sake was just completely against every moral and personal beliefs I ever had. Maybe I should be worried of what kind of person I was becoming, planning on hurting people to save those dear to me.

I didn't like that. I really didn't.

Once I was back in the safety of the small house, I quickly took some wooden bowl the peasants had given us to use it as a mortar. I looked around the stuffs they had lent us and grabbed another tool that would do as a sort of pestle. No way was I going to put poison on my medicinal equipments.

Using the improvised pestle and mortar I slowly crushed part of the fruits and leaves into a strange mixture. I eyed it sceptically, removing all parts that would potentially be spotted easily and I transferred it into a second bowl then I repeated the same movements until that second bowl was reasonably full.

I took a deep breath then and grabbed that bowl full of juices and crushed leaves with shaky hands before standing up, taking three empty water skins with me and going outside once more.

I slowly walked to the closest cistern and remained motionless for a while. I finally put the bowl down and filled my water skins mechanically. Then I stood and stared at the water. I took a shaky breath and swallowed thickly. There wasn't that much water in it, it was maybe half full, and this time I had no idea of what proportions to use.

There was no use in hesitating now, I thought while I jerkily poured the content of the bowl into the cistern. I used a long stick found on the floor and the bowl too to stir the water, aiming to dilute the poison in it as homogeneously as possible. There were already twigs and leaves floating so the added mixture wouldn't be spotted easily.

I bit my lip and felt my hand tremble but I fought against myself. Now wasn't the time to be scared or weak. It would be counterproductive to feel guilty and regret my actions. Now I just had to wait and repeat this action for as long as it will take for the people to react to the toxin contained in mistletoe. I'll come back and pour some more mixture in that water every damn night until they'd fall sick.

I felt like throwing up at those thoughts.

I hated myself.

How I wished Dori, Nori and Ori were here to try and reason with me.

How I hoped they wouldn't be as repulsed of me as I currently felt.

There was no point in dwelling on it now. I couldn't take back my actions and I didn't want to anyway. Actually that was why I loathed myself so much right now; I was doing something distasteful and I knew I would do it hundred times over if it meant my plan would work and my friends would be free.

Yes.

I was a monster.

No need to cry over it.

That night I couldn't sleep.

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><p>The following day I still tried to negotiate for my friends' liberation, but once again I only received condescending gazes. These people really believed me to be a victim and it made my blood boil in my veins. Who did they think they were, looking at me like this, judging me and my friends? I would most likely be dead if it weren't for the dwarves. The men had done nothing but harm me, scare me or disgust me since I set foot in this world. Dwarves had protected me, welcomed me with open arms, they helped me in so many ways... My home was in their Halls. I wouldn't let them rot in this bloody town and I couldn't help but glare at every human who looked at me sadly.<p>

I hated the way they stared at me. I hated them.

Finally I ended up asking if I could at least see my imprisoned friends. Obviously the men didn't like the idea of me going to the cellar to speak with the evil dwarves that were detained. The town's master vehemently protested and I had to promise not to talk with them to eventually be allowed to see them. I was to be accompanied by two men too.

Did they actually believe little old me would free all the dwarves and kill the men guarding them using blunt force?

Seriously?

Well in any case it was late afternoon when I ended up facing a door at the end of a corridor in the town's master house. There were several men in the corridors as well as the master who was hiding somewhere in that house. The door opened on dark stairs going down and I felt a shiver crept up my spine. They had thrown my friends in a dark cave. I clenched my jaw but didn't even try to say something about these awful conditions.

I gingerly walked down the stairs behind one of the two men who was holding a torch. The light was really dim and I was glad to finally walk down the last step. I looked up from the floor and couldn't help but gasp at the sight.

"Oy, dwarves. Look up." The man holding the torch snarled before kicking strongly Bofur's legs.

Angry wasn't close to cover what I felt right now.

My friends and companions were tied with thick ropes, their hands behind their back and gagged with cloths, lying on the floor in the complete dark, the only light being that of the torch the men had just brought with them. And with that light I could easily see that the men had no qualms in detaining my friends in horrible conditions. I clenched my fists, feeling my nails almost piercing my skin.

"Have they been fed?" I asked, my voice shaking with anger.

The man behind me pushed my shoulder strongly enough to make me stumble a bit. The dwarves reacted by bouncing and groaning, fighting vigorously against the ropes. Dwalin managed to look deadly even though he really wasn't in any position to do anything much. Balin's glare was positively scary and both Bofur and Bifur struggled violently against the ropes hindering their moves. Even Hràr, Péri and the others looked as if they wanted to simply beat to death the men who had rudely shoved me.

"We said you could see them, but don't talk." The man grunted at me.

I glared at him. The guilt and regret I was feeling because of my plan diminished slightly at the knowledge of how they were mistreating my friends. I nodded to the man and took a step towards the dwarves. The second man's hand on my shoulder prevented me to walk any further in the cold room.

At least now all the dwarves were looking at me and the men were in my back. I bit my lip while I thought of what I could do next. I had to let the dwarves know somehow that they shouldn't try anything violent. I had to let them know they had to be patient. But I still had no idea how to do that while those two monkeys were eyeing my every move.

What could I do or say?

The only idea I had was pathetic but I didn't have much choice and could only hope it'd work. Besides, it had been inspired by those two stupid peasants who were still behind me. I glanced at Balin who frowned deeply and observed me, clearly knowing I was up to something.

Preparing myself for the violent shove that I hoped would come I spoke, obviously at my friends.

"Are you all al…"

I couldn't finish my sentence as the predictable man brutally pushed my shoulder once more with a loud 'Oy!' and this time I didn't try to stop my stumble. On the contrary I let myself fall ungracefully as close as possible to the dwarves who were groaning and snarling violently. All of them were furious except for Balin who was still observing me. I managed to address him a small smile before I whispered lowly.

"Be patient. Trust me."

The old dwarf's eyes widened slightly and he gave me a sharp, almost indiscernible nod before I felt two larges hands grab me by the back of my tunic. I was violently yanked back, away from the protesting dwarves, and I didn't try and stop a yelp from escaping my lips. How I hoped these two brainless brutes would be among the poisoned ones. It would really make me happy to see them sick.

My anger clouded my brain for a second but I knew that soon those very thoughts would fuel my guilt. No healer should ever think anything like that.

I stumbled once more when they heaved me up and could hear the dwarves muffled protests at how I was being treated. Their growls were quite impressive I should say.

"You saw them enough. Up you go."

The man who held the torch pushed me back towards the stairs and I had no choice but to leave when the second one pushed me some more. In my back I could hear the man who was still down speak to the dwarves.

"You monsters. You enslaved the poor girl and she keeps whining for you all!"

I heard a few thuds and a grunt. My fists clenched for I knew, I just knew, the bastard had kicked one of the dwarves again. What was it with the men here? Why did they treat prisoners so poorly? It was revolting. Frowning deeply I could only admit that seeing that only added to my fears; these men were really dangerous and I really couldn't trust their reactions toward the dwarves. It only reassured me that I had been right to take actions, even though those actions were simply wrong and despicable.

At the top of the stairs I quickly asked in a cold voice.

"Have they been fed?"

"That's none of your business." The man growled.

"It's my damn business! If any of them die down there, let me tell you, you'll regret it! You'll regret it dearly!" I snapped back.

"Are you trying to threaten us girl?' He snarled.

"Threaten? That's not a threat. I'm in no position to utter threats." My tone was sweet and misled the man to believe I was scared of him.

"That's what I thought." He said smugly.

"It's no threat. It's simple logic. Let but one of them die or suffer injuries and all the dwarves from the Blue Mountains will fall on you. They will tear this place down and burn it to the ground."

I had never used such a sharp, icy voice. My eyes met his, steely while I schooled my face into a blank mask. The man didn't like it and he violently pushed me against the wall that I hit loudly with my back. My brain was so clouded by anger at this moment that I didn't even feel any pain.

The noise alerted others who came and ultimately they argued against each others before escorting me back to the little house. I had no illusions; this house was my prison. The men didn't lock it but at least half of the town eyed me suspiciously, waiting for me to attack them while the other half pitied me. I heard the door close behind me. I was alone once more.

At that moment I wasn't feeling so bad anymore about my little poisoning of the town's water. They didn't deserve my guilt, though I knew it wouldn't stop me from feeling repelled by my actions once the anger cooled down. At that instant though, I didn't care at all. I would do everything in my power to free my friends and these men would willingly cut the ropes that bound the dwarves. They would free my friends.

Just they wait. Just they wait.

Rage coursed through my veins at the memory of my companions all huddled together, hands and feet tied. The fact that these men were cruel and stupid enough not to allow them food precipitated me into a blind rage, the kind of which I had never experienced before. I felt my body react on its own volition, needing to let out this fury I felt in one way or another. Mechanically I grabbed a chair and threw it with all my force against the wall. Then it was a candlestick, then some tools, then the chair again.

During my outburst though I apparently kept my mind clear enough not to throw the table that contained my bags, tools and the hidden mistletoe.

My little rebellion was short lived though. I had never been an aggressive person. Still the notion that all of this mess could have easily been avoided if someone had just listened to reason and just sent words to Thorin's Halls like I said we should…

I was fuming.

Damn the dwarves.

Damn the men.

Damn them all.

I forced myself to take deep calming breathes and finally managed to regain my composure.

Looking outside I could see the sky already darkening. Tonight I'll prepare some more mixture to pour in the water. The symptoms should appear tomorrow; maybe they'll even start tonight. Adding more poison tonight will ensure that the quantities would be enough to at least generate some reaction. I didn't plan on killing anyone, but I needed at least one person to be seriously sick.

I wringed my hands, obviously still disturbed by the fact, that I was being forced into such measures. My anger was actually mostly coming from this situation, and mostly directed at me I realized after awhile. No one was forcing me to act, I just couldn't take the chance and that was my choice. My choice. If someone was to be damned it would be me. If someone were to have an allergic reaction and die, I'd be the murderer.

I hated the dwarves for stupidly being caught like this.

I hated the men even more for acting like ungrateful, prejudiced beasts.

I hated myself most for being so weak that I couldn't find another solution but to disavow my own beliefs.

That night, I poisoned the first cistern once more and started to poison a second one too.

I couldn't sleep anymore.

I had never felt so lonely. Never felt so torn. I really had no idea how I would be able to forgive myself for doing this to innocents. Well, of course some of them weren't entirely blameless, but on the other hand, I knew they were acting on their fears and ignorance. Didn't that make them innocent in a way?

I took my head between my hands and squeezed my eyes shut almost whimpering until I felt something cold brush my cheek.

Immediately I opened my eyes and my hand naturally fell to the side of my head, lightly brushing my braid. The pain in my chest eased a bit. I had to do this. For Balin who was being so unfairly treated. For Dori who was waiting for me, probably beside himself with worry. For the dwarves who were slowly becoming the closest thing I could call a family in this world.

I rubbed the blue stone bead between two fingers and looked at the sky.

If this plan worked, I'd soon be back in Thorin's Halls. I'd see Dís and Oin again, though I truly hoped they would let me continue my apprenticeship even after I had used my knowledge to poison people. Then I'd be once more with Dori and Ori…and Nori.

Closing my eyes I felt a small smile tug at my lips as a memory came to the forefront of my mind and I let the images sooth me as much as they possibly could.

* * *

><p>It was rather late in the afternoon and I was tired. Nori was finally getting better and he could now spend hours out of his bed without being too tired. Things were finally starting to look better, his wound was healing perfectly and now only time and rest would be needed to heal him completely. To say I was relieved would be an understatement. I felt freed by the knowledge nothing bad could happen to him…well at least until the next time he'd go out and try to find whatever it was he needed to find.<p>

Since he was getting better, I was once more going to the healing wards, essentially in the morning, coming back here to check on Nori for lunch before rushing to the market and buy fresh products and then coming back here. I'd spent my early afternoon once more in the wards and then would go back to our apartment to tidy up the place, cook and all this while making sure that Nori didn't overdo it. All in all my days were busier than ever and my nights were short, perturbed by brand new nightmares starring a deadly pale Nori, though the brothers didn't know that part. Surprisingly enough these nightmares didn't make me shout or yell, so none of the brothers would wake, which was great because Nori needed sleep more than I did. On the other hand I would wake in the middle of the night with my face and pillow wet from tears, with fear and despair hindering my breath.

That afternoon in particular I was almost sleepwalking. It was to the point that Oin had simply sent me back home and ordered me not to come back after lunch. Still I couldn't sleep, I needed to prepare some stew and I wanted to bake some apple pie for the brothers too. I knew Nori liked apples and, though the brothers and dwarves in general, didn't really appreciate fruits and vegetables, they unsurprisingly didn't mind a nice pastry or pie once in a while.

Nori was thankfully resting in his room, and both Dori and Ori were working. Dori when he wasn't busy with travelling to sell his products was, I had found out, working with Balin. The two of them were busy during winter times, mostly scheduling the missions for our mercenaries. Ori for his part was always busy writing down many things and was called for all kind of jobs related to this; whether it was writing down contracts or inventorying stocks.

So here I was, alone in the kitchen and fighting to keep my eyes open while trying not to cut my own hand with the insanely sharp knife I was using to peel the vegetables for tonight's stew. I sighed, I was almost done…or not. I had managed to peel only two potatoes in probably half an hour and that clearly wasn't enough to feed three dwarves.

I shook my head, trying to wake myself a bit, and resumed the tedious job.

I was just so tired.

So tired…

So…

…

I woke up with a jolt and immediately felt I was falling when a strong arm encircled my waist and helped me regain my balance. Blinking I realized I was in the kitchen and had most certainly fallen asleep there. I looked around and found out that it was Nori's arm that had saved me from the fall. I really hated these benches; I always seemed to fall from them. I had to ask Dori whether we could find a nice, real chair that I could use instead.

"Nori?" I blurted out, my mind still blurred by sleep.

The dwarf hummed before removing his arm from my waist. Then I realized he was currently cutting vegetables before throwing the pieces in a large cauldron.

"You peeled them all?" I noticed aloud more than asked.

I received another hum in answer and then finally my brain decided to start kicking in. I frowned.

"You should be resting! It's my job to prepare the food."

"Aye. But you need rest more than I do." He answered simply with a shrug.

"I wasn't half dead barely two weeks ago." I replied.

"No you were half dead one hour ago when your face hit the table."

I blushed at his words. All this time he had simply continued cutting the vegetables mechanically, clearly not perturbed by my little rant.

"I…I was just taking a break." I muttered

At that Nori sighed and stopped. He put the knife on the table and shifted slightly on the bench, turning to look me in the eyes.

"Amelia, I can see you're exhausted. Dori and Ori saw it too by the way. What's going on?"

I bit my lip, avoiding his gaze. Why didn't I simply tell him that I hadn't been able to sleep correctly since the day I found him lying on the floor? Why was I keeping it secret? Well, I knew…I was mostly ashamed to react so strongly to the events. I had discovered in this world that I had a real talent to overreact.

"Amelia…" Nori softly whispered before I felt his fingers brushed my cheekbones. "Why don't you want to let me help you?"

"You've been helping me since I stepped in this world Nori. Right now you need to take care of yourself, you've been hurt." I replied, still avoiding his eyes.

He scoffed.

"I'm fine. But worrying for you does tire me incredibly."

Ooooh… the bastard. He was using my worries for him against me. I turned my gaze to him and glared at him. He smirked, clearly smug, and winked at me.

"Now, tell me what's going on." He said and I sighed.

"I'm just…" I paused, rubbing my hand tiredly on my forehead. "I'm just tired Nori, that's all."

He observed me intently for a minute, unnerving me, though I managed not to squirm under his gaze. I could see the concern in his grey eyes.

"Nightmares?" He asked though I had the feeling he already knew the answer, and he probably did.

I nodded, there was nothing else to say about the subject, or so I thought. Nori for his part, apparently believed we still had lots to say about it. I hadn't known him so talkative in a while, and to be honest at the moment I wasn't sure I liked it. Well I did like when Nori and I would talk, but I didn't want him to know what my nightmares consisted of.

"Amelia." He put one hand on my shoulder, squeezing it lightly. "You know these men will not harm you. You know we'll protect you and that you're safe here, right? No one would harm you, I promise."

His voice was so soft, the whisper so full of concern and worry. I could tell just by how he sounded how much he cared and how much he hated to learn I still suffered from nightmares. At that moment I knew I just had to let him know. I couldn't let him believe I felt unsafe here, with them.

"Nori, it's not that." I whispered so lowly it was surprising that he heard. "I don't see them anymore. Haven't in a while actually."

"Then what are you dreaming of?" his whisper was just as low as mine as he frowned.

After a long minute of silence, I bit my lip and closed my eyes.

"Amelia, what do you see?" He insisted kindly.

"You. That night. But in my dreams I fail."

I didn't need to say more. Of course he understood. In a second I found myself crushed in his arms, against his chest and even in my surprise I tried to protest.

"Nori, your wounds…"

But the only result it had was that his arms brought me closer still and I finally relented. Circling his waist with my arms I let my head rest on his shoulder, turning it so that my nose would be brushing his beard. I closed my eyes while he tilted his head to let it rest on the top of mine. I was so close to him that I could feel his heart beat strongly against his chest. I let that feeling lull me into a peaceful doze while Nori held me tightly.

Neither of us seemed to want to let go, so we remained like this for a long time, only separating when we heard the entrance door open. Then in a matter of seconds Nori was once more cutting vegetables and I was starting to peel the apples.

Dori and Ori came in, greeting us warmly before joyously helping with the preparation of our dinner.

I exchanged just one glance with Nori, but for the first time in awhile, I couldn't decipher his eyes or his face, his blank mask was back in place.

That night, I had another nightmare. This time though, I didn't let the fear and despair keep me awake for long. I fell back asleep thinking of Nori and how I had felt in his arms.

Safe.

* * *

><p>I smiled at the memory. I had no idea how Nori did it, but his ability to calm me and sooth me was rather incredible. I let my head rest against the wood of the windowsill and kept my gaze on the stars. I was still playing absentmindedly with my braid.<p>

I just needed to be patient. I had no choice but to wait.

And my patience was quickly rewarded. The first symptoms appeared the following day, in the afternoon. It was a young girl. A very young girl.

An awful feeling twisted my stomach and I couldn't eat at all that day.

It had started with mild stomach pain in the morning, or so I was told later, and had escalated to greater pain and vomiting by the end of the afternoon. Her mother to try and make her feel better, was forcing the girl to drink some fresh water. That day, no one thought much of it. After all, anyone could feel sick and have stomach pains once in awhile.

That night I poisoned three cisterns.

Sleep was but a memory.

* * *

><p>Two days later the town's people decided they should ask the "healer" for help. I had saved the young boy before, I should save them now. Even though many did not trust me, simply because I was friend with the dwarves, they all agreed that they needed help quickly. I was simply there, in the little house, the only healer for miles and miles around. They needed me and they knew it.<p>

I was sitting near the window, looking at the mountains forlornly when they entered the house, without knocking at the door. I was too tired to comment on this, by now four of the cisterns had been poisoned. The men explained the situation, not knowing I already knew more than them, and I was then asked to follow them to the town's master's house. In what seemed to usually be the living room, makeshift beds had been set up for the sick.

Hurray for me. On my very first try I had managed to poison seven people. I almost winced when I saw the seven beds and the families crowding their ill loved ones. I could see the little girl, so pale and shivering terribly, two teenagers, one old man, two women and a young adult man.

How would I ever be able to face Master Oin and Dís?

How would I ever be able to face Dori, Nori and Ori?

They would hate me for sure.

The simple idea that the three brothers could despise me brought tears in my eyes. They were so honourable, so serious about protecting weak and innocent peoples…how would they react when they would learn of my actions? I had no illusions that they wouldn't find out, I was almost certain I wouldn't be able to hide my doings if they asked me. I couldn't lie to them and telling them the truth would probably doom me to solitude. I shook my head and blinked away the tears, I needed to focus.

Thankfully the people around thought I was feeling sad for them and that I was moved by the sight of the sick. Well, it's not that I didn't feel anything for them, but knowing I was responsible for the poisoning, it would be quite hypocritical to act surprised and emotional about it now.

I was egoistical and clearly despicable but at least I was usually honest, when I wasn't lying to people after feeding them dangerous toxins.

I forced my brain to focus once more on the present. Now would be one of the most difficult parts for me. Every fibre of my being was already revolting against me poisoning water. I knew already that the next step on my plan would be worse than the previous one.

"Lady Amelia, please can you help?"

I didn't answer and I made a great show of silently palpating the ill, examining each of them meticulously. In truth I was both acting the part and stalling for time; I really didn't like what I was going to do next and was dreading my next words. All in all I made it last for more than one hour.

Once I had finished examining the last one, the little girl, all the families came back to me and crowded me. I gingerly stepped away, unsure of their reactions to come.

"Lady Amelia, what do they have? Why are they sick?" The woman sounded clearly scared.

"They have ingested a bad toxin." I replied flatly, I knew perfectly the word toxin was not part of their vocabulary.

They all looked at each other, hesitating and obviously not sure of what I was saying before one man cleared his throat and asked with a shaky voice.

"Can you heal them please?"

I observed him with an emotionless face, he had been next to the girl and probably was either her brother or father. Father more likely. I didn't blink when I answered evenly.

"I can do it."

I lifted a hand to make all the cheers and relieved exclamations stop. Oh…I really hated myself. The words burned my throat, scorched my tongue as I uttered them emotionlessly.

"I can do it. But I won't do it for free."

Wow. I could have thrown icy water in their face and I'd have the same reaction. They all stood still, facing me with eyes wide, jaws slack.

"But…but you're a healer." One of them stammered.

"Yes. I am. I have been trained by various masters, two of them being dwarves; both of them being friends with your prisoners." I stated coldly.

"You would let them die?' A blond woman screeched gesturing to the seven ill villagers.

"I never said anything remotely close to that." I was trying my hardest to sound cold and haughty. Apparently it worked.

"You know we won't pay you any money." The town's master spat, glaring at me. "We should lock you down with those filthy dwarves. We should have done so immediately."

"You could do that. But then they'd all die. That's quite a high price to pay don't you think? It might be in your best interest to hear what I have to say." I shrugged.

"Or not!" A middle aged farmer snarled before storming out of the room.

I couldn't let them see how terrible I felt. My pain had to be hidden deep inside. I couldn't let them know I was bluffing either, from the look of it, and if they didn't drink more poisoned water, these people should survive.

The master was glaring at me, disdain and hate painted quite clearly on his hideous face. He was too stubborn for his own good but I didn't plan on making him change his mind. I was banking on the families who had members lying sick behind me. They should be able to force the master's hand into agreeing with whatever I'd ask. The major problem in this plan being that those very same families should feel close to desperate right about now…and there was nothing predictable about desperate people. They could just as easily listen to me or kill me in a fit of rage, though I did hope they'd listen and bargain with me, that was, after all, my goal. I had done everything to arrive at that precise moment where they'd need my skills.

I was threatening to let their loved ones die. What would they do?

That was a terrible gamble I was taking and I could just hope I hadn't poorly bet. The room was as silent as a tomb before some ominous noises came to my ears. My heart plummeted down my stomach when I heard thuds and sounds of obvious struggling and groaning. I didn't need to see what was happening to know that at least one dwarf would soon barrel through the door unwillingly.

Damn. They had way too many hostages and if I didn't solve the matter tonight, I won't have a second chance. I didn't doubt that I'd be under some sort of heavy surveillance after my little speech and act. The master would never let me leave his house free, I knew it.

A few minutes later I saw one of the dwarves being thrown on the floor in a heap. The rope tying his feet had been cut but not the ones binding his hands. My chest tightened painfully. Of course it just had to be Bofur. Not like they could choose one of those I was less attached too. It honestly wouldn't change anything much, but at least it'd be easier to concentrate without the sight of one of my close friends with a bloody knife pressed on his neck.

It was obvious to me that he didn't quite understand what was happening. He was struggling wildly against the ropes that were probably cutting his wrists. When his gaze fell on me though, I saw him tense. He quite evidently quieted down and took the time to observe his surroundings. Then he met my eyes and I could see he was starting to catch up with my plan, even though he hopefully couldn't guess how it had started.

I didn't think I could bear to see the rejection and disgust in his eyes right now.

The man that held him on the floor pressed the blade in his hand a little bit closer to Bofur's neck.

I wanted to scream and throw myself at the man before painfully tearing his eyes away from their sockets with my own hands. I almost startled then as I was quite surprised to find out I had such a violent streak in me and I struggled not to let it show.

I could be proud of my performance. Even though I was terrified, I kept a blank face and cold, steely eyes. I was thinking about all the villains who had terrified me when I was a child watching movies and was now trying to play the role. Apparently, judging from the peasants' reaction, I wasn't doing too bad an impression.

No one spoke. The only sounds being heard were the painful moans of the sick.

I quirked an eyebrow while I struggled to remain as impassive as possible. I steeled my muscles to avoid shaking like a leaf in the wind and tore my eyes away from Bofur's.

"If you don't want your friend…" The man spat that word viciously "…to die then heal my brother!"

I looked at the peasant blankly. He glared back, pressing this blasted knife against the dwarf's neck. Then my gaze flitted to Bofur who was raising a questioning eyebrow at me. I wanted to sigh exasperatedly at him and resisted the urge to roll my eyes; I hope he could guess my sarcasm 'No Bofur, I won't let you die…not willingly at least.'

I needed to act now or who knew what this stupid peasant was going to do. Looking back at him, straight in his eyes I hummed and took a step in their direction.

The man jerked, strengthening his hold on Bofur and pressing the blade almost to the point it'd pierce the skin. I saw red inside but quickly bottled up those terrible feelings that menaced to make me lose sight of my goal. I needed my brain and my wit to work at their best right now. Rage would only hinder me and endanger both me and my companions.

"So…" I said icily "What makes you think that killing my companions would in any way help you save your brother?"

I looked at the man and saw a glint of uncertainty spark in his dull brown eyes. Then I glanced at the glowering master and finally turned around, pointedly ignoring the peasant and the master as I talked to no one in particular.

"I have something you want. Skills. Healing skills. I could save your loved ones." I paused here, purposely to let those words sink in their brains. "Now as I said, I won't offer them for free anymore. I already healed one of your children for free and look how you repaid my kindness."

I really had watched too many movies. My words were so cheesy, so corny, it was like a very cheap show and yet these people bought it. I turned back once more pointing my finger at the man who was holding Bofur. My movements were sharp and I was surprised that, despite my size, those tall men seemed to inch slightly back. Not letting such things trouble my concentration, I kept on talking, voice colder than ever.

"Threatening me and my kin, that is how you repay kindness." I forced a disdainful look on my face, which wasn't difficult at the moment considering all the negative feelings that threatened to suffocate me.

"We let you stay with us, free and safe!" An elderly man exclaimed.

"How can I be safe without the protection of my kin?" I snorted derisively.

"You're completely mad! Enslaved by the dwarves!" Someone spat.

"Well, even if you were right, which you are not, I wonder why it should matter to you."

That silenced them all for a second and I could see several exchanged uncertain glances. I forced myself not to smirk. Well, I just needed a little bit more luck. The master's was about to talk but I didn't let him enough time to utter any word.

"So, as I was saying before being rudely interrupted, I will agree to heal all these people. But I will ask for payment, and I won't require gold."

The master's eyes narrowed and I could hear some people around sighing with relief.

"Let me guess, you want us to free the dwarves, right?" The town's master said lowly.

This time I did allow myself to smirk slyly, as I stared right back at him, unperturbed by his hostile glare.

"Why should I want gold in such a situation? I wonder." I said smirking, before once more schooling my features into an emotionless mask. "Can we discuss like adults now?"

At the murmurs and whispers around, the master and I both knew he had no choice. My plan was coming along quite nicely for now. I could only hope my luck wouldn't abandon me suddenly.

"Alright." He nodded begrudgingly. "What do you want exactly?"

I took a deep breath and glanced at Bofur. He seemed calmer and had obviously guessed what was going to happen next.

"First. All my friends have to be released and fed. Secondly, I want a contract to be drawn and signed between our two communities to avoid such problems in the future. Dwarves should be able to pass through your town safely, even stay the night if they so wish and in exchange they'll provide you with better tools and other items you might want or need. You will see the details with Master Balin." As an afterthought I played my only trump card that might convince the town's folks. "I will add my healer's skills in the agreement too if you so wish."

He seemed to hesitate way too long for my taste so I kept on talking seemingly emotionless.

"I ask for nothing more than what you were ready to discuss and agree to a few days ago. I'm even offering you the skills of a true healer. Besides do you really think you can afford to offend the dwarves of Thorin's Halls? Do not doubt for a minute that if we're not soon on our way back there, many more dwarves would come down the mountain to look for us."

I could see the doubt in the peasants' eyes. Forcing a soft tone in my voice I finally said.

"An agreement will be beneficial to us all, surely you can see that."

"She's right." I was rather surprised to hear an elder man mutter.

"Aye, she is." That one was a woman.

For a second I thought no one would protest, but obviously it couldn't quite work like that.

"What about the fact they planned to attack us?"

I made a show of rolling my eyes and sighed.

"They didn't plan to attack you. They were simply worried. We hadn't thought coming to an agreement with you would take so long. The others only came to find out what was taking us so long and as we already said, dwarves always travel with weapons, surely you can understand that."

That managed to shut them up. Some of the men even looked sheepish while a few women looked uncertain. Soon at least half the people around were muttering their agreement and at long last the master grimaced and nodded before he looked me in the eyes.

"Fine. We'll draw a contract with the dwarves and we'll come to an agreement with them. Now help them."

I didn't like the way that ugly man thought he could order me around. I narrowed my eyes at him and said coldly.

"No. First, please, be kind enough to ask your friend to release mine. Let me assure you, if blood is drawn all agreements will be invalidated. Free all the dwarves who are being held downstairs and provide them with food, give them all their weapons back too. Then I believe two of your advisors and yourself should go in a separate room with Balin, Bofur and Péri. The six of you will be able to draw and sign a contract while I take care of the people here."

"You give a lot of order for someone so young." The master snapped.

"You're free not to obey. But then whatever drama happens will be on your hands, not mine." I shrugged.

He grunted in response and gestured to the man who was holding Bofur. He didn't seem happy to let the dwarf go but he obeyed nonetheless. Soon Bofur was free and I strode to him, checking him quickly for any injuries.

"You were amazing lass…"

"Not now Bofur" I couldn't help but retort rather coldly.

I was slightly relieved that my plan had functioned so far, but it didn't mean I was feeling better about it all. Anger, shame, self-loathing and so many more dark feeling were brewing just beneath the surface. If I were to lose my concentration now I truly had no idea how I'd react.

It wasn't as if it was a habit of mine to go and poison everyone around and then blame myself for it. And with my past, there was no way I could deal with such events in a carefree manner. I swallowed sickly and forced my focus on Bofur.

He sent a concerned look in my direction but I simply ignored him. Waiting with my arms crossed on my chest for the other dwarves to be freed. We didn't wait more than ten minutes before shouts began. I sighed. I was close to snapping. Really snapping.

I briskly strode to the door and I could easily hear the voices groaning and shouting. I followed the noise, Bofur next to me, and was at least thankful to hear all the dwarves calm down at my sight.

I looked at each dwarf intently.

"Is any of you hurt?" I managed to say though my cold voice seemed suddenly foreign to my ears.

"No. We're fine my dear." Balin answered hesitatingly.

"Balin, you, Péri and Bofur can arrange an agreement today. I believe if you work efficiently and calmly enough, we can all leave this place by tomorrow morning." I said quickly.

I didn't give any of them any time to talk to me further. I walked back to the sick people and faced the consequences of my awful actions. Biting on my lower lip I started by turning to face one of the woman.

"Do you have any garlic left?"

"Hem…ye…Yes I think we do."

"I'll need enough for all of them, please go and bring it back."

I took a slow, calming breath and then turned towards the other people who were healthy and still there.

"I believe this people are suffering from a form of natural poisoning." It wasn't really a lie, now was it? "It's most frequently encountered when there isn't any running water around to drink." Again…it was easier to poison cisterns than rivers, right? "When was the last time you emptied and cleaned the water cisterns?"

"Hem…I don't, I don't really remember." One of the peasants said hesitating.

"Well, I strongly suggest you go empty them and clean them now. Don't drink any more water from it. Don't even use that water to wash what may come into contact with food."

"Are you sure?" The woman who asked seemed scared. "Such a thing never happened before."

I felt a lump in my throat but did my best to remain stoic.

"Really?" How did I manage to sound so disbelieving? "No one has ever been sick before?"

"Well sure…"

"This kind of toxin will not poison everyone; some may be sick today and won't be in two years. There's nothing certain, just, clean the cisterns." I had never told so many lies in my life before.

"But we won't have any water left…"

"Isn't there any river nearby enough for a few of you to go and gather some water while you wait for rain to fall?"

"Well, we don't usually go…it's quite far and it would take so much time to bring water for everyone." One man said while rubbing the back of his head.

"I do suggest you do it, at least until rain fall once more." I insisted, I couldn't tell them that some of the cisterns hadn't been contaminated.

I saw one of them nod and leave quickly, probably to arrange buckets and other things needed. It only strengthened my guilt to know that these people would struggle to get water until rain fell.

On those words I spent the whole afternoon and night taking care of the town's folks. The fact that none of them died didn't make me feel better in the slightest. The men hadn't seen anything when cleaning the cisterns, which didn't make the huge weight on my shoulders lift either.

No.

I was still in a terrible mood.

It was early afternoon the next day when the dwarves finally decided to leave this town. Until then I really hadn't had any time to speak with them. Now though, we were already walking in the directions of the mountains and the group around me was strangely silent.

I didn't pay attention to the glances I received, walking silently, looking straight ahead and clearly not paying attention to anyone. I only wanted to be home but my heart was beating painfully and loudly. Guilt and fear were battling for dominance in my chest and both were hurting me.

At first Balin and Bofur tried to speak with me, asking how I was, clearly worrying about my sudden silence. I didn't mean to but I just couldn't speak to them. My throat was too dry, my thought too muddied. All the feelings I had bottled up in town were menacing to get the better of me. At some point even Dwalin tried to come and talk with me.

All the dwarves were clearly on edge at the sight of my sudden muteness and numbness. I was completely lost in my mind and didn't pay any attention to my companions. Among all the dreadful thoughts that whirled in my mind, among the memories and faces long gone that still haunted me, I could punctually see three friendly smiles.

I wanted Dori, Nori and Ori.

I wanted to see them so much.

I needed to see them.

I needed to know they wouldn't despise me for my dishonourable acts.

* * *

><p><strong>AN: Again, thank you all for reading/reviewing/and following this story. It is always amazing to read reviews :) I can't explain how happy I feel each time I receive one. **

**Mary: I'm glad you ended up enjoying the chapter ^^ I hope you weren't disappointed by this one, I promise lots of Ri brothers in the next chapter :P**

**So... I know some of you had guessed more or less what Amelia was going to do, and I truly hope it came out believable. You can't imagine the trouble I've had to find a poisonous plant that I could use...I did cause this trouble myself, but I needed something that grew in the middle of winter in plains nearby mountains... I truly hated myself for a moment when I wrote this chapter :)**

**I hope Amelia didn't come out too whiny...that truly wasn't my goal. Well, she does overreact and always beat herself, but I hope it wasn't too extreme and unbelievable here. **

**I added the Nori scene for all of those who missed him in the previous chapter, and because of it this chapter turned huge. It seems I can't stop the words sometime, but I truly didn't want to cut the chapter in two.**

**I still struggle with the rewriting/ massive edit of some later chapter and I decided to delete two of them completely. So the next update will probably be around Friday. I don't think I'll manage to update earlier.**

**I hope you enjoyed the update! **


	18. Confessions in the Dark

**Everything belongs to JRR Tolkien except for my OC and the plot.**

**Warning:****The opinions or topics used do NOT reflect my personal opinion in any way. Do NOT assume I am actually giving my opinion in this chapter, or wish to start any kind of debate, I DON'T.**

* * *

><p>We left that stupid town rather quickly, walking fast as if running away though I knew the dwarves were probably only eager to put as big a distance as possible between us and that damned village. They weren't afraid, that I knew for sure, but they simply wanted to quickly be home and reassure the others that awaited us.<p>

We walked until late that evening. The sun had almost already disappeared behind the horizon when we finally stopped to camp under the trees. None of the dwarves bothered me that night, though I could feel their worried eyes observing me. I simply sat, my back leaning against a trunk, and remained rather motionless while they all prepared fire and food. Bofur brought me some bread and meat, but I truly couldn't eat.

I dozed off for awhile but my thoughts were plagued by the faces of the sick peoples in that town. Guilt was suffocating me slowly, anger eating at me, and then, suddenly, brutally, the faces of my past came up to the surface of my thoughts. At the forefront I could see the newspapers displaying photos of my father just below the catchy headlines. Then the long forgotten voices rang in my ears, mocking, accusing, insulting.

_'You shouldn't be here!' 'How could they allow someone like you to try and be a doctor?''You think she'll turn like him? -Well, the apple doesn't fall far from the tree…'_

I clenched my fists. I was struggling to keep everything bottled up.

I was glad to see the sun rise the following morning. I barely ate, picking at the food Bofur brought me. My stomach was knotted and my brain clouded. I didn't speak a word that day, and I could feel that the dwarves were starting to be seriously concerned. I could hear Balin's and Bofur's whispers behind me and I could feel each of Dwalin's glances towards me. Even Hràr and Péri were quite obviously nervous about my incomprehensible silence, as were the others.

I was so tired.

Anger and fear kept me going though.

Why was I angry again? I couldn't really remember. I had been furious when I had been in Gorm, planning the whole poisoning thing, but why couldn't I let it go? What other choice did I have back then? None. At least none that I knew of. Then why was I still so angry? Was it really because of this, or was it because all those people, those voices that haunted me, had been right in the end?

The apple doesn't fall far from the tree indeed.

The fear at least was something I could deal with. I could deal with it simply because I knew what I was afraid of. Mainly I was terrified of the reactions the dwarves will have when they would know. Because they would have to react, they couldn't possibly forget about it. Could they?

This fear was tearing me apart. At the moment I didn't know what I wanted most, run towards Thorin's Halls and the brothers' familiarity and safety…or run far away, far from their judgement and their potential rejection.

At some point on the second day I realized that Dwalin, Bofur and Balin started to slow their paces and I had automatically imitated them without realizing it. We stopped early that evening and even though my mind was clouded by other thoughts, I couldn't miss the fact that all the other dwarves weren't camping with us. They were already further away, probably hurrying to give news to the King about the trade agreements and the situation that occurred in Gorm.

I for my part couldn't really care less. I seemed unable to speak as I wondered endlessly if there had been other possible solutions. Then I pondered on fate, genetics, family curses and other similar topics. My mind was buzzing with all those thoughts and it was only sheer exhaustion that allowed my eyes to close that night. When I woke up though, I felt far from rested. I didn't need to have medical knowledge to know that I needed to rest and soon or something would break, whether it was my body or my mind which will shut down I didn't know. I just knew that I couldn't last forever in such a state, but try as I might, I couldn't reign on my fears and I needed the anger to keep going.

So I fuelled the anger, remembering the hate I had felt against my father, thinking about how I hated the men of Gorm, basically focusing on negative and angry thoughts instead of the fears.

By the end of the journey I was walking like an automat, looking at my feet, not paying attention to anything around me. My eyes were open but unseeing, my ears worked but I didn't ear. I didn't even startle when a heavy hand fell on my shoulder. Glancing to my side I saw Balin worriedly look at me. I attempted to smile at him but failed utterly. He pointed forward and my gaze turned back to look straight ahead.

Glancing up I felt my chest tightened at the sight in front of me.

The massive doors of Thorin's Halls were standing tall, opened and not even twenty meters away, under the door's arch, stood Dori, Nori, Ori, among other dwarves who were all clearly waiting for us. My brain though only registered the faces of the three brothers. They were talking together but from where I stood I couldn't clearly see their faces, I didn't miss the moment they finally saw us though.

Suddenly, my body seemed to forget its exhaustion and a rush of adrenaline gave me the energy to run toward them. My fear and anger were dismissed for a moment; I needed the brothers, needed to see them, to be with them. Now. I'll worry about their disappointment later. I stumbled a few time but managed to quickly make my way towards them, and as soon as they saw me, they rushed towards me too.

I was soon crushed into a group hug with my three favourite dwarves.

Oh, how much I had missed them.

I let a shaky breath out. I was finally home. They were still here for me. They didn't know yet. I could push away the negative feelings that plagued me a little, I could forget about them for a short while still.

Dori was right here, in front of me; strong, calm, comforting.

Ori was at my right, rubbing my arm; sweet, caring, understanding.

And Nori. I could feel his hands, one on my shoulder the other on my back. I basked in the feelings he evoked; peace, safety, warmth.

The three of them protected me from the world.

Clutching Dori's purple tunic more tightly in my fists I felt as though all the barriers I had put in my mind would soon break and I didn't relish having a public breakdown. With my face still hidden in Dori's chest and the rest of my person properly hidden by Nori and Ori at my sides, I looked slightly up and whispered with my heart in my throat.

"I want to go home…" It sounded like a plea, and truthfully, it was.

Among the loud chatters and warm welcomes that were booming around us from all the other dwarves, it was a marvel that the three brothers heard me. I saw them look at each other and I couldn't miss Ori's worried glance and Nori's narrowed eyes. Apparently they didn't like how I sounded right now. Dori simply nodded and gathered me in his arms, lifting me up as if I weighted nothing, and without saying a word to the others he just walked in the direction of our home. Taking a glimpse above his shoulder I saw Nori and Ori in a heated discussion with Bofur, Balin and Dwalin, and they soon were joined by Dís and Oin.

Dori and I were already in one of the long corridors when I suddenly realized I was basically forcing an old dwarf to carry me around.

"Dori, if I'm too heavy you can put me down." I whispered glad to hear my voice was still working even if it were barely audible.

I had completely lost my voice on the way back. It was a marvel though that the simple fact of being here, with the brothers, would bring it back. Right at this instant, in Dori's arms, I felt as safe as a child being held by her parents could. Dori snorted at my whispers and simply told me I didn't weight even near as much as what he could carry.

"I'm strong Amelia, don't you worry about me."

He only put me down after having kicked our home's door open and entered the living room. He gently and carefully helped me on my feet and looked at me worriedly.

"My dear, how about I fix you some soup? Chamomile maybe?"

"Chamomile would be great Dori." I answered with a shaky voice.

He observed me while I stumbled to the chair nearest to the fire and let myself fall in it. The roaring flames in the earth did nothing to really warm me though and I let my mind drift away once more as I was alone.

When he came back, a tray in his hands, the door opened to let Nori and Ori in. As soon as they saw me, they rushed to my sides, helping Dori by handing me the warm cup that was on his tray.

Nori looked at me with intense concern and worry. He softly took my hands in his and helped me take a hold on the steaming cup.

"Can you drink by yourself?"

I simply nodded and took a sip of chamomile sugared with a copious amount of honey. Tears welled up once more in my eyes and I hated myself for it. As soon as they appeared I felt the brothers tense and I had to try and ease their worries.

"I'm fine…" I tried to convince us all. "It's just." I hesitated slightly. "It just tastes like home."

I let my gaze fall and I stared at the cup filled with warm liquid. For a moment, all my worries and fears seemed to drift away and I could only feel warmth and peace. It truly did feel like home.

"I'm happy to be back." I whispered.

"We're glad you're back."

And just like that, because of a few words whispered by Ori that warmed my heart more than I thought it would be possible, I felt tears start to gather in my eyes again. This feeling of peace clashed rather violently with all the negative ones that still battled in my mind. I was aware that Ori had taken the cup away from my trembling hands and when I started to cry Nori had already taken hold of my hands. It wasn't enough though. With a sob I almost jumped out of my chair, launching myself towards Nori who didn't waste time and encircled my waist tightly with his arms.

I clutched at his tunic, crying loudly, my face hidden against his chest while he held me against him. I could feel Ori rubbing my shoulder and arm, trying to soothe me. The poor dwarf probably looked completely lost at the moment. Dori was kindly patting my head, and the thought that they might never do that again once they would know didn't help me at all. My breathing was completely erratic by that point and I wasn't paying any attention to what was happening around me.

The three brothers were whispering hurriedly in Khuzdul and, though I couldn't understand a word, the sounds of their voices oddly started to sooth me a bit. I had no idea how long it took them, put at some point Nori started to hum and I heard the sounds of flutes. The oddity of this broke me completely out of my torpor and I blinked, looking slightly around though I didn't free Nori from my hold on his tunic. A few steps away from us, Dori and Ori were playing a soft, appeasing tune that once combined with Nori's deep hum lulled me to a peaceful state.

By the time they ended it, I was calm again and was listening to the music with my eyes half closed. Tears still escaped my eyes from time to time but it was nothing like the painful sobs that had wracked my body minutes earlier.

"You alright?" Nori whispered in my ears and I shivered.

Nori probably sensed it because he tightened his hold a bit before starting to rub my back with one of his hand. I took a long breathe and finally nodded.

"Better." I managed to croak and Ori offered me a sweet, though a bit sad, smile.

"You're home now, you shouldn't worry about anything." Dori said while coming closer and patting my head.

I felt a lump in my throat but nodded to let him know I had heard. Fear menaced to grow once more in my chest but was thankfully stopped when Nori squeezed me lightly with his arms still around my waist. I looked at him and saw his grey eyes shine with concern. His brows were furrowed too and I understood he must have felt me tense. His strong presence against me somehow managed to give me some much needed courage. I hated to see him so concerned and worried. Swallowing thickly I decided I needed to do something about it. Besides I just needed to see his smirk, I wanted to see him wink at me as if nothing had happened.

I cleared my throat a bit and tried to offer him a smile.

"You know," I squeaked. "You told me to beware bandits, wolves and trolls…"

His frown deepened a bit and he hummed.

"You never said peasants were dangerous. I think you should add it to the list next time."

I knew what I said wasn't really funny and my shaky voice just sounded miserable. But for one reason or another, I saw a small, very small, smirk tug at his lips. The relief I felt at the moment I saw it weakened my knees and Nori gently helped me back to my seat. Ori was smiling sweetly at me and Nori hovered nearby. None of them wanted to let me out of their sight apparently.

Ori was now kneeling at my right and Nori sat on the floor at my left. Dori was back in the kitchen and, by the smell of it, was preparing some stew or soup for me. I absentmindedly heard a soft knock at the door but didn't look up until I saw a form moving towards me. Glancing up I was honestly surprised to see Dís, Bofur and Balin coming closer to me, followed by Ori who apparently had been the one to open the door.

"I brought you back your bag." Balin gently said, before putting said bag on the floor beside a small coffee table.

All the dwarves observed me and my fear came back at the forefront of my mind. Swallowing thickly I felt my shoulder slump and I frowned. I worried about my friends' reactions, I was really scared about what they would say. Would they tell me the same things I heard so many times in the past? If they did I knew it would hurt me much more this time around, after all I cared for them and their opinions.

They all took some seat and Ori handed me my cup of chamomile tea with a soft, encouraging smile. He knew what this simple drink meant to me. Time passed in silence while I gingerly sipped the warm liquid. Nori now sat in a chair facing mine; he had taken his pipe out and was smoking, observing me silently. Dori came back from the kitchen some short time later and took a seat between Balin and Bofur and I could hear them whisper with Dís. Ori was seating just next to me and silently observed my every move, just like Nori did, though I guessed that they could understand the whispers of our friends whereas I couldn't.

I didn't know how long we had been silent when Ori chose to speak.

"What happened for you to be so sad?"

Ori's voice sounded probably as sad as I felt. I looked at him and felt my heart plummet in my stomach. I flinched and my fears and worries took the best part of me. I suddenly could imagine in vivid details what they would say. I pictured myself being despised and hated.

Dwarves were so honourable. They were so serious and intent about protecting innocents and weak people from harm. They took so much pride in their honesty and righteousness. They had the heart in the right place, my aunt would have said.

I might have been idealizing them a bit, but for all their flaws, they had so many more qualities. They had saved me, helped me, and protected me. They were good people.

And what I did just wasn't up to par.

It was sneaky, treacherous, and despicable.

I had intentionally poisoned people.

Dwarves fought their battles head-on. They didn't do it in such a vile way.

They wouldn't understand why I did that. They would only find me pitiful, weak and despicable.

While all those thoughts whirled in my mind endlessly, Dori apparently decided that my reaction was simply not logical and, instead of waiting for me to be able to talk, asked the others for more information.

"Balin, what happened in that town? Did the men hurt her?" Dori's voice was controlled but I could hear the cold fury beneath the calm tone.

"I truly don't think so Dori. She looked fine when we were freed."

"Aye, more than fine I'd say. She shut down on our way back. Didn't utter a word." Bofur added.

"And that didn't worry you?" It was Nori's turn to use a frighteningly calm tone.

"Well…"

"I didn't follow you 'cause you said I wouldn't be needed. You said you'd protect her." Nori continued with the same, scary voice.

"Wait, Thorin was the one who thought you shouldn't go. T'is not my fault if your face is known in certain…"

Listening to them all fight didn't help me whatsoever. I was already so tired, so anxious, and to see them so angry already didn't bode well for me in when they would find out. I was going to be completely ostracised, just like my father, worse even. I felt tears burn my eyes and a cold shiver ran down my spine.

"Amelia!" A worried cry broke their dispute.

My chest constricted and I found it suddenly very hard to breath. In a second, Nori was beside me, kneeling next to my chair, his hands taking mine while I realized I had let my cup fall on the floor. In the meantime I hadn't paid any attention to Dís who had reacted as quickly as the others and had opened my travelling bag already. She took my medicine satchel. I could hear the others speak together but I couldn't find it in me to react.

"Dís, can't you do something?" Dori asked hurriedly.

"I know she has some lavender in there, it'll sooth her a bit." She said while looking in my satchel.

My heart missed a beat and I clenched my fists. My gaze fell on Dís and observed with a very odd fascination as she took the small leather bag that contained the remnants of mistletoe. I saw her open it and heard her gasp clearly.

"What is it?" Dori asked worriedly while standing and coming beside me.

"Oh…Amelia…" Dís soft voice whispered. "Amelia what have you done?"

I looked at her, terrified, and tried to speak. A choke was the only sound I made. The dwarves were looking from me to her, not understanding what was going on, why Dís had spoken in such a soft and sad voice and why I was frozen on the spot. Only Nori didn't look at Dís, his eyes were riveted on me and I could feel his thumbs brushing against my knuckles absentmindedly as all his attention was clearly focused on me. I looked at Dís helplessly, I had no words to express what I felt at that moment and I was too scared to speak. I wasn't stupid. I knew this was it. This was the moment when they would all learn about what I did. I couldn't look at her anymore and I lowered my head, staring at Nori's hands instead.

Seeing that I wouldn't or rather couldn't answer her, Dís turned toward Bofur and Balin.

"Bofur, Balin, tell me exactly what was happening in that town when you all got freed." I saw her frown as she spoke.

"What? Well, hem…" Bofur stuttered.

"I wouldn't know much…" Balin muttered, frowning too. "I was in the cellar while Bofur was taken upstairs. Though I know that Amelia planned something to help us out, I had no idea what she did."

"Bofur!" Dís' voice was stern now as she turned to face him. "Tell me now what happened exactly!"

"Well, I don't know exactly what happened." He shrugged. "Some people were sick and they obviously needed Meli's help. She bargained her healing skills in order to free us."

"Aye, six, maybe seven of them were ill." Balin added then.

"They were sick you say?" Dís asked in a small voice and I flinched.

I knew she had already connected the dots. Nori's hands squeezed mine lightly and I glanced at him, did he know too? Apparently he didn't because his eyes only reflected worry and concern. I had rarely seen him so worried too. I felt my lower lip quiver and bit it harshly to stop it. My gaze went back to Nori's and mine hands. Will he jerk away from me when he'll understand? I remembered how people had reacted to my father after…

I squeezed my eyes shut, trying my best to forget about my past. Meanwhile, Bofur was still talking to Dís.

"Well, aye they were. They were mostly sick in the stomach I think." Bofur shrugged, not understanding where Dís' questions were getting at.

I couldn't take it anymore. I had the sudden urge to see how Dís was taking in the news that I had poisoned people. My eyes met hers. I was terrified of her reaction and she knew it. Just as I knew she had guessed my deeds.

"Oh Amelia" She sighed.

I hiccupped.

Suddenly Nori's hands let go of mine and my heart broke.

It literally broke.

He had jerked away.

But then I felt him sit on the armchair just next to me. He was so close I could feel the warmth of his body and when Nori's arm snaked around me and squeezed my shoulders I closed my eyes in relief. Maybe he hadn't understood yet, which meant he might still jump away from me, but for the moment I didn't want to think about it, I just wanted to hope. Meanwhile his other hand took hold of one of mine again and resumed brushing my knuckles lightly. His presence kept me together and managed somehow to calm me slightly, though I was still unable to face them all. A terrified looking Ori was gently rubbing my right arm, and it pained me immensely to see this look on his face.

"What is going on Dís?" Dori was getting nervous, I could tell from the way he sounded.

Dís shook her head slowly before sighing once more and finally she spoke the words I had wished never to hear.

"She purposely poisoned the people in town to make them need a healer. I guess in order to bargain for the others' liberty, right?"

I closed my eyes and bit my lower lip violently. I clenched my fists so strongly that I felt my nails pierce my skin in my right hand. The sting in my palm was nothing compared to the hurt in my chest. I didn't dare look up at them. I didn't dare see their reactions.

The people around were among the ones I held dearest to my heart and whose opinions mattered the most to me. I wouldn't be able to bear their rejection. I couldn't see the disgust in their eyes.

I was a coward.

'You reap what you sow'. My aunt used to love this idiom. She would use it all the time when I was a child. Usually she would say that when I made something silly and had to be punished for it; like that time I had chosen to paint the walls in my rooms with other colours when I was nine or ten. I wonder if she would have considered poisoning people a 'silly thing'. Probably not. Especially considering our family's past. Yet she would have said that idiom and she would have been right. Everyone has to face the consequences of his actions at some point. Now was apparently the time to face mine.

It was the feeling of Nori still close to me that gave me the courage to look around. I suddenly realized he hadn't jerked away, he was still here, supporting me, holding me. I couldn't even start to put into words how glad I truly was for his silent support. I forced myself to open my eyes, readying my mind for the evident revulsion my friends would surely display. My body was tense and my heart rate quite rapid.

When my eyes opened, they immediately fell on Dís. I gulped. Her face was unreadable. Feeling my breath caught in my throat I quickly glimpsed at Balin, Bofur and Dori.

Bofur was surprised. Simply surprised. But there was something else, another emotion. It took me awhile to recognize guilt. Guilt? Why would he feel guilty? My eyes turned to Balin who looked hurt and regretful. I blinked several times before looking at Dori. He was obviously angry and that made me flinch.

Immediately Nori's arms strengthen their hold on me but I couldn't find the courage to look at him yet, just as I couldn't see rejection from Ori's eyes. My eyes went back to Dís who decided to speak once more.

"Amelia, did any of them die?"

I shook my head but it took me some time to finally be able to voice a very weak "No".

"Amelia, what brought you to this? What did you do exactly?"

Apparently Dís didn't know exactly what had happened in Gorm, I tried to inhale and exhale slowly. It took me several long minutes before I could talk and my voice was barely audible. Thankfully for them, dwarves had good ears.

"I. I can't…Dís I'm. Sorry. So…sorry. I didn't know. Know what else to do. They. They were ter. Terrified of the. The dwarves. Any. Anything could. Could have hap. Happened." I stammered pathetically.

I realized then that Nori was brushing soothing patterns on my arm while still holding on my hand. I chanced a glance at him.

The only feelings I could see in his eyes were concern and worry. No repulsion. No disgust or suspicion.

The weight that hindered my breathing lifted.

They didn't seem to hate me at all. That shocked me more than anything else. It must have shown on my face quite clearly because Dís spoke again.

"Amelia, you shouldn't take it so hard. What you did was…unusual but you saved our kin. You helped them get out of this situation. You did well."

"It. It's not. Not honourable." I hiccupped.

Nori squeezed my shoulders once more and I could feel heat radiating from him. I was surprised to hear Ori speak next.

"Honour is a tricky thing. What is more honourable than protecting your kin by every possible mean?"

I blinked.

Dori patted my knee and I glanced at him. He was softly smiling at me, a proud glint in his eyes. Balin had the same look on his face and Bofur was openly smiling at me too. Dís was more reserved but I could easily see the concern in her eyes.

I felt my brain stop for a second.

Seriously?

Had I been worrying all this time for nothing?

I suddenly felt as if I would never understand the dwarves' logic.

I must have spoken aloud because they all chuckled at that moment and Balin sweetly patted my knee, just like Dori had done minutes ago, before speaking softly.

"My dear, it's easy to understand. We dwarves think that the outmost honourable thing to do is to always protect our kin."

"We stick together, we protect each other. Simple really." Bofur said before adding kindly. "You really did nothing wrong Meli."

"Do not dwell on this Amelia. If anything it shows how resourceful and reliable you are." Dís added with a smile. "I don't think I would have thought of using such a plan myself." She mused softly.

I saw the other nod, approving her words.

I was simply flabbergasted. To think I had worried so much about what their reactions would be. I felt utterly stupid now. I had, once more, overreacted in dramatic proportions. My pessimism and my natural ability to criticize myself had once more been highlighted. I shivered slightly and Nori, who was still sitting on the armchair, brought me closer to his chest. I felt a terribly huge weight being lifted from my shoulder and I could breathe so much more easily. Still, everything wasn't solved and I felt doubts and guilt, but there were some things I just couldn't say aloud to all those dwarves. No matter how much I cared for them, some things were best left alone.

While I was busy sorting out my thoughts, Bofur kept on relating the events.

"You should have seen her too, in that room full of angry villagers. She even managed to scare me!"

At that I felt a blush on my cheeks. I wasn't proud of it. Not at all. I winced and felt a pang of pain in my heart. Dís obviously saw it because she asked Bofur none too kindly to shut it.

"Amelia, we are not judging your actions. No one here is going to scold you, or despise you. Why do you still doubt us?"

Her words struck me and tears welled in my eyes. I didn't even try to stop them from falling.

"Dís" I brokenly tried to say.

They were all observing me, clearly not understanding why I was still so obviously hurt by the events. They were all frowning but I could tell it wasn't from anger; they were merely concerned and curious as to why I reacted so strongly to something that I shouldn't be worried about according to their moral.

Looking at them I felt now maybe was the time to explain a bit more about what was ailing me. Besides, I owed them to at least tell a little bit more about me, about my past. I let my gaze be caught by the fire and cleared my throat while Nori gently rubbed circle with his thumb on the back of my hand. Ori was now holding the second one and he was encouragingly patting it.

"I just…where I come from such acts would be considered against the law. It's very serious. And for a healer to poison people…" I took a deep breath while my heart was racing in my chest. "For a healer to poison people…"

I could see them all completely focused on me when I turned my head to gaze at them. There wasn't any judgement or any disappointment in their eyes, but somehow I just couldn't. I simply couldn't get the words out.

"It's like my… it's…" The words I wanted so badly to pronounce were caught in my throat.

Why couldn't I admit this to my friends? It wasn't such a big deal, not anymore. So many years had passed since those events and I wasn't even in the same world now. Still, I apparently was unable to admit something so painful to them.

"I just…I don't do well with poisoning." I said lamely, feeling utterly defeated.

The dwarves shifted awkwardly around me and they looked positively uneasy and confused. I knew they wouldn't understand what I had tried to say, mostly because I hadn't been able to say it. But at least with the bit of information I had managed to give, they would understand that my moral standards were once more completely different than theirs.

I felt suddenly very tired and just didn't want to talk anymore. Topics I had managed to keep away from my thoughts for so long kept coming back at the forefront of my mind and I just didn't have the strength to fight against them. I wanted to forget my past, but I just seemed unable to do it.

Without looking at my friends, I slowly stood up, and turned away from them.

I didn't really feel the anger and fear anymore, guilt had replaced them thoroughly.

The only thing that mattered was that I had done something that would have been considered terrible where I came from and that I had done it while being perfectly informed of the consequences. I had done it purposely, on my own free will. I couldn't blame anyone but myself, and I was now scared. Scared of myself, of what I could do and might do.

I really had felt too much anger and doubts these past few days and it exhausted me for nothing. I had over reacted once more, and knowing the dwarves didn't dislike me was soothing me greatly, but I now had to deal with things they couldn't help me with.

When I entered in my room, I didn't expect to feel so at ease. This was my space, my little room at the end of the corridor. I looked at the few possessions I had. A few notebooks I had filled with notes of plants and dried flowers, charcoal pencils I used to write because I still hadn't taken the time to try and write with ink and an actual feather pen. Some clothes, dresses mostly, cut in pure dwarvish fashion and in deep colours, blue and purples mostly. Leather shoes, wooden comb, leather bags, wooden bed and trunks. Suddenly, I had the urge to see something else. Something modern. Something from my world. I had to prove to myself I hadn't dreamt my life before I met the dwarves.

I let myself fall to my knees in front of my trunk and rummaged through it, not hesitating to throw my other clothes out of it and around me on the floor. I finally found my hoodie and my old tattered jeans at the very bottom of the trunk. I had cleaned them but had never worn them again after I had arrived here.

I took a shaky breath, holding them in front of my eyes. Yes, those came from my world. I came from another world. A world where poisoning people, was not normal, was not right, no matter the circumstances. I felt my back collide with the cold stone wall as I sat near my trunk, holding my clothes close to my chest.

I was deep in thought when I heard a soft knock on my door. I looked up to see Ori's head looking at me before he came in my room completely. He sat silently next to me, our shoulders barely touching.

"I don't really get it." I whispered.

Ori remained silent, he probably waited for me to explain and develop my thoughts, so I did just that.

"I understand that for you it's nothing big. I understand you believe that what I did was…normal. But I don't really get it. For me it's really not normal. I was so scared Ori. So, so scared that you'd all hate me, despise me."

I shook my head and Ori used that time to put his arm around my shoulder and speak.

"Amelia, I can understand that certain things are different here. And it's probably normal that you feel sometimes…disturbed or upset about those differences. But there's one thing you need to put in your head." Ori said calmly though his tone was incredibly serious.

I looked at him, not surprised to see him looking back. He didn't smile sweetly though, his brows were furrowed in a serious and concentrated pout.

"Whatever act you do that you might think is bad, or wrong, I can tell you that Nori has done ten times worse. And Dori too probably. Actually to be entirely honest, you have to realize that dwarves aren't a gentle peaceful folk."

I snorted, not really amused but simply thinking this was probably the biggest understatement I had ever heard.

"I'm starting to think that all the people living in this world are far from being peaceful and gentle." I said with a sigh and surprisingly, Ori laughed lightly.

"Well, except for a small race leaving east from here, I think you're right."

"Anyway, it doesn't change what I did."

"No, but it should reassure you."

"How so?" I sourly asked.

"Amelia, none of us is ever going to hate you because you did something to help dwarves. Sure, had you been trying to save elves, well that would have been another story. But even then. You didn't kill anybody. It's fine. Besides, I really don't think you could do something that would make Dori or Nori, or me, hate you. We're happy to have you around."

I pondered on his words while tears sprung to my eyes. I was so touched by his words that I couldn't stop myself, though I really wished I would stop being such a cry-baby. I sniffed a bit before engulfing Ori into a tight hug.

"Thanks Ori."

"Anytime Amee."

I chuckled a bit before leaning back.

"Amee?"

"Aye, I thought it sounded better than Meli."

"It sounds amazing Ori."

And with that we ended up hugging each others for a good ten minutes before I asked Ori to tell me what happened during my absence. We chatted rather happily, my worries and doubts put aside for the moment, until I realized that it was rather odd that none of the other two brothers had come to check how we were doing.

"Where are Dori and Nori?" I ended up asking.

"Well, Dori had to go with Balin to review some contracts, and Nori had a few things he wanted to buy at the market."

I simply nodded and smiled at Ori, asking him to tell me more about this peaceful race living east from here. Immediately I could see his eyes shine at the prospect of sharing his knowledge, though he was a bit disappointed to tell me not much was known about these weird folks called 'hobbits' because they lived in a close-knit community and didn't trade with dwarves, at all.

I didn't know how long we spent simply talking about things and others, but it felt so normal, so natural, that I truly did forget my little daddy issues for awhile. It was only when someone knocked at my door that we both looked up and realized we had spent a good part of the afternoon just chatting.

When Nori's unmistakable features came into view, he simply quirked an eyebrow at seeing us sitting on the floor.

"You'll catch a cold sitting there." He just said, slightly frowning while Ori pouted.

"I'm not a child Nori, I'm fine."

"Who said I was talking to you?" Nori replied shrugging, clearly teasing his little brother.

"Wh…what? You're trying to tell me you don't care if I'm sick?" Ori squeaked, apparently doubtful but highly disturbed at the idea that his brother wouldn't care for him.

A slow smile widened on my face as I saw the mischievous glint in Nori's eyes. He glanced at me before answering in a flat tone to his brother's shocked question.

"You always say you're an adult, I'm treating you like one…"

I shook my head still smiling at their antics. Nori loved to tease his little brother, that much had been obvious for awhile, but the fact that Ori always took it so seriously never ceased to amaze me.

"But…" Ori's face was priceless, both shocked and surprised.

Nori chuckled before coming forward and rumpling Ori's hair and gathering him in his arms.

"Ow, come here dwarfling. Of course I don't want you to get sick." He said with a smile while Ori relaxed, still slightly pouting.

"You're mean."

"Aye, I know." He smirked before turning to me. His eyes narrowed slightly and I could tell he was trying to assess how I currently felt. "We just finished preparing dinner, are you coming?"

"You cooked?" Ori and I both said.

"Is that so surprising?" he huffed at us.

Ori and I shared a glance before we both talked.

"Well…"

"Honestly?"

"Yes." We both chorused and Nori shook his head, mock glaring at us.

When I entered the kitchen after Nori and Ori, I couldn't help but gasp at the sight. The table was covered with various dishes. That wasn't unusual per se, but when I saw what those dishes were, I felt another round of tears gather in my eyes.

On the table I could easily see the black pudding cooked with apples, the salads and tomatoes freshly cut with pieces of cheese, fruits, vegetables and I could smell the amazing smell of freshly baked bread. There was some meat too but it was so obvious that this meal had been prepared for me that I couldn't stop the tears from falling.

My heart seemed to swell in my chest and I grabbed the first brother, Ori, in a tight hug.

"You're all so amazing."

I managed to gasp after I released Ori and hugged Nori instead. I felt him pat my back and I had seen the happy yet slightly smug smirk on his face.

"I love you all so much."

I felt Nori freeze in my arms for a short second but I didn't pay attention to it, I was already turning away to hug Dori who smiled softly at me and gathered me in his arms.

"It's nothing Amelia, just a few dishes."

"Still. Thanks."

I happily sat at the table. Dori and Nori had outdone themselves. It was so obvious that the whole dinner had been prepared according to my taste. I couldn't help but grin like a mad person at the sight of all the fruits, vegetables and various dishes. I felt a few tears at the corners of my eyes and I hastily brushed them away, I didn't want to cry anymore.

Those three dwarves were simply amazing.

Nori sat next to me and I smiled at him. My smile widened impossibly when I saw him smirk smugly and wink at me. I couldn't help it, I let a few giggles escape my mouth as Nori started to pile up food on my plate.

Dori and Ori were sitting on the other side and I could see Ori trying to mentally encourage himself. He was clearly not doing so well until Dori put some meat on his plate. We all started eating and I enjoyed the usual silly banter and chatter of the three brothers. They were acting as if nothing had changed. As if everything was completely normal.

And I felt so grateful, so happy, and I thought at some point that my heart was going to simply burst out of sheer happiness.

Looking at Dori trying to bargain with Ori in order to make him eat green food was just plain fun. Nori was softly smiling at the sight too. I grinned at the local thief and he smirked back, obviously relieved to see that I acted normally around them. I gently bumped his shoulder with mine, before eating more than I had in weeks, until I just couldn't even bear the thought of putting food in my mouth.

Being here, with the three of them felt right, it simply felt right. My presence around this table didn't feel odd, I didn't feel like I was imposing. It was at that moment that I first thought that I might have my place around here. It might have been a truly good thing that I had come to this world. It was hard, terrifying and disturbing, but it felt right too. I felt like I belonged around this table. And then I realized that even if some people had loved me in my old world, I had never been so unconditionally accepted. The brothers simply didn't care about what I did or could have done. They only cared about the fact that I was back. They only cared that I was back with them.

And for awhile I completely forgot about why I had been so upset a few hours ago.

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><p>A few hours later had me screaming while jolting awake, in tears once more. It took me several long seconds, a few minutes even, to realize I was lying in my bed. A nightmare. I hesitated between laughing and crying; my mind was becoming rather predictable. Why? Why when I had spent the end of the day smiling, laughing, feeling simply good, why then couldn't I just have a whole peaceful night of sleep? I needed it too. I was so tired. Why was my brain betraying me like this? Why? It seemed so unfair. So weak too.<p>

I sighed deeply, rubbing my forehead with my left hand, trying to calm though my mind was in a frenzied state. I somehow rationally knew that everything was back to normal, but I had this terrible feeling gnawing at my heart, terrifying me and my thoughts kept going in morbid or frightening directions. In the meantime I had heard crashes and scrambles, even a curse, coming from the other rooms and my door bolted open.

Nori and Dori came in first, wearing wrinkled tunics that they had obviously put haphazardly on. Seeing them, my heartbeat slowed down to a less dangerous pace and I felt my arms extend towards Nori on their own volition.

The dwarf didn't even seem to think before quickly gathering me in his arms while sitting next to me on the bed. Dori came to us, putting his hand on my forehead, removing gently the tresses that stuck on my face.

Ori came just a minute later, still wearing his long white cotton tunic I knew were his night clothes. Dori seeing this went to his brother and wacked the back of his head.

"Go put some clothes on!" he chastised his youngest brother.

His serious reprimand about Ori's inappropriate state of clothing forced a small, uncertain smirk on my face.

"Are you alright? Do you wish to have something to drink?" Dori asked me with obvious concern.

Meanwhile Nori was slowly rubbing circles on my back, keeping me close to his chest.

"I'm sorry…" I whispered. "It was just…I'm fine, just a bit..." I didn't finish my sentence.

What did I feel at the moment? Was I scared? Simply uneasy? Ashamed? What scared me most? Whose faces really haunted me right now? Thankfully Dori didn't need to hear the end of my sentence before he answered kindly.

"Alright, I'll leave you then. You need calm, we shouldn't crowd you." He told me before turning to his brother and speaking a few words in Khuzdul.

Nori replied in the same way which really surprised me. I was, of course, used to hear dwarves speak in their language now even though I didn't understand any of it and didn't try to. But the three brothers usually spoke in a language I could understand. It was strange to hear them use it, but I wouldn't even have thought to comment on it.

I saw Dori nod seriously and leave, grabbing Ori who was about to enter the room and instructing him to go back to sleep.

I distinctly heard and felt Nori's sigh when the door closed behind Dori.

I shifted a bit in his hold as I let my head fall on his shoulder, my cheek brushing slightly against his braided beard in an oddly familiar way. I felt his hand slowly caressing my hair and an extremely strong feeling of calm grew in me. I sighed contentedly without realizing it and let the peace of the instant soothe my nerves. Nori at this point had gathered me on his lap and was rocking me slightly while whispering in my ears that it had only been a dream, that nothing was real.

I didn't understand how I could feel better only after hearing him say things that I rationally knew to be right, but didn't accept until he said it.

That was most peculiar and I thought that I should one day talk to him about it.

That night though, at that moment specifically, I didn't really care about all that. I just wanted to feel better and Nori had always been the one since my arrival here, to manage to calm me down and ease my worries after a nightmare.

Strangely enough, while I was apparently unable to tell certain details of my past to all the others, I had no such qualms or problems when it came to Nori. I trusted him completely and even wanted to tell him what was hurting me; I couldn't help but hope and believe that he was the only one who might help me out of my dark thoughts. It was strange. Ori was a great listener and I had often told him about my world, but there were topics we never talked about. It was the same with Dori. But obviously there was something different in my relationship with Nori because I could speak with him freely, completely freely.

I let my eyes close and listened to the soft thud Nori's heart made. This sound combined with Nori's presence was enough to let me feel much better than I had in weeks. Patiently, just like we had done so many months ago and so many times already, I waited for my fears and doubts to ease away slightly before I spoke in whispers.

"My father was a doctor, a healer, too."

Nori's hand froze on my back and his hold on me strengthened slightly.

"My mum, she was a well respected teacher at uni, she taught history. I was seven when they died. It was an accident, but some people told it was my father's guilt who forced him to drive the car down the bridge. Other said it was God, like Mahal, who did it to punish him. Some even said he deserved it. I think, well I always hoped, it was just the fog that was thick that night, the road that was slippery, something like that."

Tears were menacing to fall from my eyes. I could once more see the headlines in the newspaper 'Killer MD kills himself. ' 'Doctor Killer went down.' How utterly stupid. How tacky. Had those people no shame? No sensibility? Didn't they care for the families?

I shivered and felt my stomach churn. I had always hated journalists since those events. They were always looking for catchy sentences in their headlines, never bothering about those it would hurt. I was seven back then, but they had followed me during my whole life. The worst memories linked to those headlines happened during med school, where I had simply been ostracised by my peers because of who my father had been. All my life they haunted me. At some point I even remembered hating my own father for what he had been…before I felt guilty for having those feelings. Still he kept haunting me, even in another world it seemed…

"They died because of the…hem…ca, cal?" Nori asked, obviously searching through his mind for the word I had explained to him months ago.

"Car. Yes. Well, my father did. He had an accident and fell in a ravine. My mom she…She couldn't stand the pain and the…shame. People around, they kept talking and talking about my father's actions. Some kids kept on writing stuff on our car, our door. I don't remember much, but I know that around then, even my grandparents stopped talking with my mum. It was just…awful Nori. People hated us. And my mum…well, she killed herself a few months later."

Nori remained silent, like he often did in those moments, he didn't ask question, didn't remark that I wasn't making that much sense sometimes. He knew I needed time to express my thoughts. I never found out how he did, but he knew exactly how to react, when to speak and when not. This dwarf had a singular ability to understand me and it was both impressive and slightly scary.

"The people. The people thought my parents deserved it. Well not mum, but they thought it was right for my father to die. Just because. Just because my father had…he had killed a few of his patients. Stopped their sufferings really, or well, that's what my aunt used to tell me. These people were so sick and in so much pain, that my father helped them. I never…I never tried to learn more about the events. I couldn't. But people they just didn't want to let me forget about it."

I felt a sudden burst of anger at remembering how people thought that it was normal to keep sneering at a young child just because her father had done something reprehensible. Hell, I hadn't understood at the time. I couldn't defend myself, and even my aunt and uncle…well, they had taken care of me, but they had tried so hard to make me change my mind when I told them I wanted to become a surgeon. At the time I had thought it was because my aunt was still ashamed of her brother's actions, now though I wondered whether they knew how much the people in med school would remember and how they'd behave.

Nori was now caressing my hair, trying to appease me while I found it hard to breathe. After a short pause, I finished the story, knowing that Nori would then know why I had reacted so strongly to the recent events.

"He helped them die. Killed his patients." I paused to take a deep shaky breath. "He used some chemicals I think to do it."

"Chemi…?"

"Like poison."

I gasped, finding it suddenly hard to breathe. Nori's arms tightened on me and he brought one of his hands under my chin, forcing my head back on his shoulder, he then turned his face and gently pressed a kiss on my forehead.

Tears rolled on my cheeks while he started to hum a low tune. He rubbed my back while his other hand was still under my chin and gently moved to my cheek. He kindly brushed the tears away and I felt better quite quickly. I remained silent for awhile, concentrating on his hand still on my cheek, on the low tune he was humming, on his lips that kissed my hair or forehead from time to time. I just wanted to savour this moment that belonged to just the two of us.

I finally felt some peace and calm.

After awhile, Nori had stopped humming and was now simply rubbing my back, his head resting on mine, and my mind drifted to other, less painful thoughts. I let Nori's presence sooth me like it always did. My head was resting against his shoulder and I was on his lap but I didn't feel uneasy or weird. If anything it felt oddly right and peaceful. One of Nori's hands was still on my back while his right one was on my knees.

When Nori decided to speak he didn't startle me, but he did surprise me a little with his words.

"You shouldn't compare your acts with that of your father. The situations were entirely different. Plus, you're not him."

I felt a slight lump in my throat and had to clear it before being able to answer.

"I poisoned people, just like he did. But I'm worse than him. He did it for them, I poisoned those people not to help them, but for me."

"No, you didn't." Nori confidently said.

"You weren't there Nori!" I snapped without really meaning too. "I poisoned those people because I wanted to free the dwarf. Because it would help me. Me, and only me."

"So, you didn't care at all about Balin, Bofur, Dwalin and the others?" Nori retorted tonelessly.

"What?"

"You said you did it for yourself. So it means you didn't care about the dwarves. You didn't even think about them. You just wanted to poison those people."

I had never heard Nori talk like that, so calmly and so much. It was strange, it really was and it befuddled me. Besides, he was speaking utter nonsense.

"No I…"

"Why did you poison these people Amelia?"

I took a second to shift my position and I looked up at him. Nori was staring back at me and I couldn't see any negative feelings on his face or in his eyes. He was waiting, patiently waiting for me to answer and there was such kindness in his gaze that it made my heart swell with warmth.

"I." I had trouble finding my words once more. "I poisoned them so that they would need my help."

"What for?"

"To heal them."

"Amelia, don't play dumb with me."

It felt odder still to be chastised by Nori and I couldn't help but blush.

"Fine, I wanted to trade my skills for the dwarves' freedom." I snapped slightly.

"And did it work?"

"You're the one who's playing dumb now." I grumbled.

"Well, it seems to me that you need it right now." He retorted still calm and collected.

I glared at him before sighing loudly.

"Yes it worked, Nori." I answered exasperated.

"And did anyone died from the poison?"

"No. But I was only lucky that no one died." I was getting annoyed with his little game now.

"So, how can you think that what you did is even remotely close to your father's actions? You're not your father. You're not in the same world. You live here now, what we believe in is clearly different. Let your past go."

I blinked at his words. The annoyance I was starting to feel melted away and was replaced by surprise and disbelief. It seemed so simple to do when he said it like this. He made it sound so logical. Still I knew I would struggle with this for quite a while. And then I strangely felt a little bit of amusement mixed with exasperation at the dwarves' reactions. They were just plain weird.

People around had doubtful moral, or at least had entirely different definitions about integrity and honour than I had. I couldn't even start to accept my actions, they were in contradiction with what I was, what I had always wanted to be. No. I couldn't accept them, but I wouldn't lie either. Right now, I was glad for Nori's dubious definition of integrity.

"It's so easy for you to say." I whispered.

"No, it's not. But I'm only saying this to help you." He answered with a saddened face.

After long minutes Nori decided to break the silence once more and I felt his arms tightened around my waist.

"Stop beating yourself over every little thing."

I didn't reply to this. I knew he was right. Sort of. I had realized that I tended to overreact quite a lot since I came in this world. But to be entirely honest, I wasn't sure how I could change that. This place scared me a bit; it was all so different from everything I had known. It felt sometimes as if I was walking on a small thread and at each steps I was taking the risk to fall to my death.

Still, I couldn't ignore that I had a few dwarves holding my hand and probably ready to jump right behind me if I did stumble.

"Please, I hate to see you suffer like this." He whispered again, and I leant back a bit to look at his eyes once more.

The intensity that I saw made my heart rate waver. I clutched one fist in his tunic and whispered my answer.

"Give me time Nori."

He didn't reply, but after a short minute I saw him nod slightly, our gazes still locked together. I offered him a soft smile then and was happy to see some of his worries and concern fade away from his face and eyes. After he smiled slightly back, I rested my head once more on his shoulder and closing my eyes. Our discussion was pushed away to the back of my mind, because at that moment we had said all that needed to be said about this issue and I just didn't want to think more about it. I felt so at ease here, so safe right then in his arms. I brought one of my hands to rest on his chest and felt the soft thud of his heart.

I was at peace.

For the first time in quite awhile, I was entirely at peace.

We remained like this for several long minutes, a peaceful eternity, and when I half opened my eyes it was only to take his right hand in mine. I let my fingers graze his knuckles and I didn't pay attention to the fact that Nori seemed to tense ever so slightly. I slipped my fingers in between his and looked down at our intertwined hands. Without looking at him I whispered.

"I'm so tired of all those nightmares…I never used to have so many."

"Well, your life did change quite a bit." He sounded like he found it amusing and I slapped his chest slightly before snorting a bit too.

Well he wasn't wrong really, my life did change quite a bit. Every little thing I had thought to be constant and certain had been left behind. Now I didn't take anything for granted anymore, Nori's injury had made sure of that. Still, there were some things that I could rely on. My gaze was still glued to our hands. I looked at how his fingers lightly held onto mine. His hand was so warm against my skin.

"I've missed this. I've missed you." I whispered suddenly, blurting the words out without really realizing it.

I didn't need to speak more nor needed I explain what I meant. The months spent without him by my side had been excruciatingly long and lonely, now that I thought about it. And even after our reconciliation, it hadn't been really the same because I was mostly tending to him. When we were slowly starting to find back this peaceful rhythm between us I had left for Gorm and it had separated us for almost a whole agonizing month. I knew I had missed him, that I had missed the feeling of being in his arms but I only realized how much now.

I felt him squeeze my hands lightly.

"I know…" he said and paused for several silent minutes. "Me too…"

I let my eyes fluttered close for a few seconds and didn't open them when I breathed out.

"I don't want." I needed to take a deep breath before continuing just as softly. "I don't want to go through all this again. Never again."

Once more I didn't need to precise that I spoke about those terrible months where we hadn't even spoke at each other. Nori squeezed my hands some more, his head resting on the top of mine, before he raised his left hand to caress my hair and then my neck, softly brushing it with his fingers.

"Me neither…"

We stayed silent his hand still on my neck, until he turned his head slightly and cautiously kissed my brow.

"Try and get some sleep now, Mizimul."

I perked up at hearing him speak in Khuzdul but he simply silently released my hands, tenderly helped me to leave his lap and lie back on the bed. He gently held and squeezed my hand once more, still sitting near me, before he stood and left without meeting my questioning glance once. I didn't know he would lean heavily on the stone wall after leaving my room. I didn't know he would have trouble to sleep that night.

All I knew was that his words and acts had, once again, helped me find peace.

I lay back on the bed and slowly fell asleep, my skin tingling slightly as I remembered the feeling of his lips.

The nightmares didn't plague me anymore that night…and I woke up without being able to remember what I had dreamed about.

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><p><strong>AN: Alright :) First a Huge thanks to Mary and the nameless guest. I was glad to hear that the previous chapter didn't come out as badly as I thought it was. Thanks too for the other reviews, readers, favorites and follows. **

**For this chapter, well first I hope you're all happy with the Ri brothers :) I did add a few last minute scenes (the diner and discussion with Ori) I hope you enjoyed it as much as I did when I wrote it.**

**Second, Yep, I finally decided to give a bit more details about Amelia's parents. Well, to be honest I had decided on this background story almost as soon as I started writing (same moment as when I decided to make her a healer) and later only did I think it'd be "interesting" to force her to poison people...maybe I'm a bit mean...**

**Third I hope you enjoyed the fluff and overall sweetness...I actually hope it wasn't too much ^^**

**Thanks to Sarah0406, she's the one who gave me the idea for the nickname Amee. I think another reviewer used it, but I'm sorry I don't remember who. **

**Well, and I put this in the warning on my profile, and I really wish to repeat it here. Please do not assume that I am in any way trying to convey my personal opinion on assisted suicide. I chose to use this topic for the plot but I do not wish to offend anyone, nor do I wish to take part in any kind of debate on the subject. If you feel offended I can simply said that I'm truly sorry.**

**I'll try and update soon. Early next week I guess. I'm almost done with the remodeling of the next 6 chapters. after that I'll be able to keep on writing :)**

**Next chapter...some more Ri brothers and a surprise...**


	19. On the Road Again

**Everything belongs to JRR Tolkien except for my OC and the plot.**

**Warning...don't kill the author please :) **

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><p>I woke up quite late but didn't lose time, as soon as my eyes popped open I was out of bed, feeling strangely giddy and refreshed. It was most surprising after the awful nightmare I had gone through during the night. I shuddered when I remembered the faces of my past mixed with the accusing glares of the town's people I had seen in dreams. I forced myself to think about something else. I hadn't lie to Nori, I just needed some time to let the shock of the situation ease away. That and to try and sort out my own feelings about poisoning these people.<p>

I stretched lazily and quickly put on some clean clothes before walking to the door. When I opened it I could hear voices clearly coming from the kitchen and arguing. The closer I got to the door, the better I could hear.

"She should be allowed to sleep after this ordeal!"

"I want to talk to her Dori. I want to hear from her too what happened…" The King sounded extremely exasperated.

"You already heard the other dwarves' explanations. Why do you need to hear hers now?" Wow, Nori sounded even worse. "She's tired and upset. She shouldn't be asked to relive through it all once again."

"I just want to ask her what she thought of these people." I recognized the King's voice as he sighed. "She's the one who spent the most time with them; I just want to know her opinion."

"I won't go and wake her now. Come back later." Dori all but groaned.

"I'm not going to interrogate her for Mahal's sake!" The King seemed to get angry now.

I sighed. I just knew that the brothers would be stubborn about it all, even if the King was yelling at them. It would once again end up in an endless and useless argument. And it was just too early in the morning for dwarves to yell at each other. Besides I had heard way too many shouts recently. I just wanted some peace and quiet in order to sort out properly my own feelings. Nori had greatly helped yesterday, but he couldn't wipe fifteen odd years of my life out of my memories just like that. I had greatly suffered from my parents' death and actions and to think I had done something both so similar and so much worse than my father had…

It made me shiver.

I was brought out of those grim thoughts when I heard that both Dori and the King raised their voices. Yep, if I didn't intervene there would be loud shouts soon enough in the kitchen. I sighed, a bit exasperated, couldn't dwarves talk normally? Were they obliged to yell and shout each time they didn't agree with something?

Opening the door widely I saw that the King wasn't the only one visiting us at that time. The others were simply wise or smart enough not to participate in the heated discussion between Dori, Nori and the King. Ori was sitting next to his brothers, the King sitting at his right while he faced Balin and Bofur.

The three silent dwarves were eating peacefully, seemingly not paying any attention to their King and the other two. I wondered how long Dori, Nori and the King would take to realize that they needed not discuss whether I should be awoken anymore. I shook my head and decided not to intervene, if they wanted to yell, that was their problem. Meanwhile I grabbed a plate before taking some of the sausages that were still grilling in a pan. I then simply went to the table, took a seat next to Bofur silently, making him startle a bit before he offered me a warm smile.

The other three were still yelling but Balin leant back to smile at me from behind Bofur's back and Ori offered me a small wave and a sweet smile before the four of us resumed our breakfast. It was somehow amazing to see that Dori, Nori and the King were so taken by their argument that they hadn't realized I was sitting among them.

While I observed them I wondered how much it would take to make them react to my presence. I wasn't surprised to see that Nori was the first one to see me, though his reaction made me chuckle.

I had just finished eating and was looking back and forth between Dori and the King while Nori stood behind his brother, arms crossed, looking positively fierce. For a minute my thoughts seemed to escape my control and I couldn't help but muse about how such a look fitted him. When Nori shifted though, my mind was brought back to the present time.

Then I saw Nori look at me and at first he didn't react, letting his eyes drift over Bofur and Balin before his head jerked once more in my direction. His eyes widened and he jolted, knocking into Dori who stumbled forward.

"Nori what in…"

I smiled at seeing how surprised the three now silent dwarves were. The King though didn't lose time and sat back before staring at me.

"Amelia, I've been told you were trusted by those people. Is that true?"

Well, we couldn't say our King wasn't direct and to the point. Our King…

I felt both my eyebrows rose. Was I thinking about this dwarf as my King? That was most peculiar. I didn't care much for kings and stuff related to politics. So why would I think of him as my King? What did that even mean? It felt natural to think of Thorin's Halls as my home now, was it equally natural to think of our leader as my King? There I went again, thinking of him as our leader.

Unaware of my thoughts, the dwarves glanced at each other in silence, clearly hesitant. They had no idea as to why I had turned mute and it visibly unnerved them. I couldn't fault them for that. In the end it was Bofur who decided to shake me away from my musing. Physically shake me. He did it so strongly too that I almost fell on the floor with a yelp, jolted out of my thoughts quite rudely.

I squeezed my eyes shut as I did fell, but instead of the hard floor, my back met with two strong arms and a hard chest.

"Ow!"

"Hello there, falling for my charms?"

At this new voice I opened my eyes to see brown, mischievous eyes twinkling at me in mirth and a wide toothy grin. He really was the only person I knew who could say something so stupid while still managing to appear rather nice and cute…

"Don't know what you're talking about." I deadpanned while still being held by Kili.

"Do you want me to let you fall?" He tried to sound threatening and serious and I couldn't help to snort.

"Do you want me to whack your head as I promised to do, so long ago?" I retorted just as seriously, though a smirk tugged at my lips.

"Was that when you lost your way in the corridors and I came all the way down to save you?" He replied mockingly.

"Oh…I always thought your brother had saved me and you just tagged along…" I said, sounding as if I was truly shocked.

"Enough!"

The King's voice snapped us back to reality and Kili helped me to sit back on the bench while sheepishly looking at his uncle.

"Sorry uncle…" He muttered.

For my part I decided that staying silent was a good option.

Looking up and around, I realized that Fili was here too, smiling at his brother's and mine antics. Bofur and Ori were smiling happily too, clearly amused while Balin and Dori shook their head, softly grinning too. Actually, the only one who appeared angry, well besides the ever-angry King, was Nori and I send him a questioningly glance which he ignored. In fact, he ignored me and sat back next to his brother.

For my part I stood and offered my seat to Fili while I went to find some more food. I had no doubt in my mind that the younger dwarves would want to eat too. During the few minutes I took to go and grab some more bread, cheese and ham, the dwarves were back to exchanging pleasantries, and here I meant insults, jokes and barbs.

While they so civilly discussed their point of views, I sat back at the table, this time facing the cheeky Bofur. I was now squeezed between Ori and Nori. The youngest brother offered me a wide, sweet smile before serving me some more bacon and sausages. The fact that a simple breakfast could last for hours around here and just melt into lunch never ceased to amaze me.

I was not hungry at all though, but remembering the events of my first breakfast around I carefully decided not to inconspicuously put it in Nori's plate, two wedding proposals already were enough between the two of us. Instead I gently nudged Nori with my feet while observing his reaction with the corner of my eyes. He stiffened at first and I knew he was still angered by something. Still he glanced at me questioningly and I discreetly pointed at my plate, pulling a face to let him know I really couldn't eat.

His anger seemed to vanish from his face, replaced by a soft smirk and a gentle gaze directed at me. I felt glad, truly glad that he wasn't angry anymore, though I really couldn't understand him. He smirked and nodded slightly, making me smile before I turned back to look at the other dwarves. I knew perfectly that the food in my plate was going to slowly diminish in quantities thanks to Nori's quick hands and unending appetite. Besides, there were sausages at stake.

To be honest, I tuned the dwarves' discussion out quickly. I really had heard and seen enough of that stupid town for awhile. Shouts and the sound of my name among them broke me from my thoughts.

"She can't go back there!" Nori snapped.

"I don't see how they'd do anything to hurt Amelia. Besides, this mission is completely harmless. There's no risk whatsoever now the contracts have been signed." The King groaned in response.

"She just came back and you want to send her away to these barbarians?" Dori's incredulous tone was quite funny to witness.

"She might be helpful. She's the one who managed to talk to them after all…" The King shrugged.

"Hem, sorry, but what's this about?" I finally asked.

The King was observing me and soon all eyes were on me. I shifted uncomfortably on the bench, waiting for them to tell me whatever it was they were yelling about.

"We have to send a group of dwarves back to the village."

"What for? We just came back, surely there's no need for more talk right now?" I said, shivering at the simple thought of more talks between dwarves and these men.

"The agreement we signed stipulated that we'd send some items soon as a sign of good faith." Balin started to explain.

"They're acting as if we were the one attacking them." Bofur said shrugging.

I ignored him, not wanting to point out that, hadn't it been for the fact that the dwarves had been caught, they would have indeed attacked the men first. Right now I had to focus on something else and besides, Bofur wouldn't have appreciated this remark.

"I just don't understand why you want me to go now, when you were so against it at first." I simply said playing with a few bread crumbs, looking anywhere but at the King.

"From what I heard, they trust you. You managed to talk them into accepting this contract…" He started before Bofur interrupted him.

"Bully them into accep…Ow!"

I glared at Bofur while he glared at Nori who had thrown him a metallic spoon that hit him square in the middle of his forehead. Nori for his part didn't care much for Bofur's glare and simply drank his ale.

"As I was saying." The King said clearly exasperated. "These people seem to trust you at least bit. And besides they asked for you to come back to check on the people who had fallen ill while you were there."

I startled slightly at that and quickly looked up, staring at the King who, from what little I could tell, didn't seem to know all the details about the mysterious illness. Balin glanced at me and I could feel the other dwarves tense around me. I send a questioning glance at my older guardian and he slightly shook his head. So the King wasn't aware of my deeds. Why? Why didn't they tell him?

I shivered and felt the blood drain from my face. I was forced to close my eyes and, with my elbows propped on the table, I quickly hid my face in my hands. I was utterly ashamed at my own reaction, especially in front of all these men, honourable warriors really, but I couldn't help it. I was far from being able to put everything behind me. From below the table I felt Nori's hand gently squeezing my knee. I caught a glimpse of his concerned face from behind my fingers. I tried to weakly smile at him but didn't quite manage to.

"Can't you see she's tired enough as it is? She already greatly helped those people, surely they can send for another healer. The poor girl was so upset about all the events that she barely slept last night because of her nightmares." I heard Dori snap.

I took a deep breath, glancing at them I saw the dwarves shift awkwardly on their seats. I strangely didn't feel ashamed to hear Dori reveal this information. That was kind of low to use one of the dwarves' weakness here; forcing them to see their actions were making a woman suffer. Dori was a mastermind that much was sure.

I really didn't mind him telling all this. It was the truth and even if it felt slightly awkward to have them all know my weaknesses, it didn't matter much in the end. Still, I decided to intervene. Clearing my throat a bit to catch their attention I spoke calmly.

"I really wouldn't mind going back there." I started before Dori, Nori and Ori protested. "Wait." I stopped their protests. "I wouldn't mind, really. But I don't think I'll be able to go now if you asked me. I need…some time."

"We don't have much time girl. We need to deliver the items now."

"She's telling you she can't."

"No she's telling me she doesn't want to." The King snapped back at Nori. "Her fears are unfounded; the men are expecting us to come, they won't attack us this time. Besides, they didn't attack her. Why are you so scared of them anyway?"

"Thorin, listen, the lass is…"

"No Balin. I don't see any reason why she couldn't go. As I said, it's entirely safe."

Dear Lord, this man really didn't take no for an answer. Who did he think he was?

Oh yeah…

Right. He was the King. It was quite obvious he was taking decisions and didn't like to be disobeyed. I wondered what he would do if he knew about the poisoning, somehow I didn't think it would change anything. And what if I refused to go? Would he consider it a breach in our contract? I remembered the oath I spoke. I did swear to obey him…

Great.

What choice had I left? Yep, none. I had sworn an oath to a King in a medieval era; I couldn't simply ignore the repercussion my refusal would have. I sighed deeply, trying to be rational about this. To tell the truth I didn't fear going back to that town as much as I feared being back there. The real problem I still had to voice was that I didn't know how I'd react to someone accusing me of poisoning. Worst even, how would I react to them thanking me? I knew I'd be as safe as could be with dwarves around, if they didn't get captured again, but they couldn't protect me from my own mind.

The dwarves were already back at shouting at each other and I even heard them starting to yell in their language when the King stood up and banged his large hand violently on the table.

"Enough! Dori, Nori, Ori are you telling me that the girl's fears are more important than our community's lives? And do you actually believe I'll send her without the certainty we would be able to protect her? If we don't send the items and the healer we promised quickly all those talks would have been for nothing. Do you want that? If we break our contract with them so soon who is to say that their hate will not fester and expand to other towns? Who is to say they won't force other men to attack us and stop all trade with us?"

Everyone was silent for a short while before Balin spoke softly, trying to calm his King while clearly still trying to protect me.

"The lass is no delivery dwarf Thorin, her presence might not be required. She already helped more than what was required of her, we should let her stay here and recover."

"She could help the sick and wounded, she's a healer and a woman, they'll naturally trust her more. They already trust her more." The King countered.

"Then can we go too?"

My eyes widened and I looked at Kili curiously. His face was strangely serious; there wasn't any hint of amusement in his eyes, no smirk on his lips. The other dwarves observed him and his brother and the King shook his head before sighing.

"Kili…"

"You said there was absolutely no risk in this mission. It's just a delivery and they are expecting us. Besides if they trust Amelia, don't you think they might come to trust two young and friendly dwarves more than old grumpy ones?" Fili interrupted his uncle and spoke calmly.

I tilted my head slightly. What he said made sense. Both Fili and Kili were charming, and here I didn't mean handsome, though they of course were really that too. But their personalities were easy, they smiled and laughed easily. There was no doubt in my mind that they would be better welcomed than Dwalin for example.

"Fili, Kili" The Kind groaned. "I told you already…" This time I was the one to interrupt him.

"I'm sorry, but what they say makes sense. The villagers would probably be friendlier with friendly people and, I'm sorry Balin but, Dwalin, Hràr and Péri aren't exactly examples of friendliness." I spoke quickly though my tone was even.

"And this town isn't that far. We've been further away when we went with you on hunting trips." Kili added, leaning slightly on the table, eager to hear his uncle's decision.

"I could go with them if you want to." Bofur said before the King could answer. "The town's people already know me and I did participate in the talks."

I saw the King sigh as he rubbed his hand on his forehead tiredly.

"Alright, alright. The four of you can go. You're leaving tomorrow morning. It shouldn't take you more than a week, no delay this time."

Well apparently the decision was made. I was going. No discussion.

When I felt Nori tense next to me I just knew another yelling match was about to start and I didn't feel it'd be productive.

"Thorin, you can't ask her to do that! She just came back for Mahal…" Nori's outburst was sharply cut by the King's angry voice.

"Nori, I tolerate a lot of things coming from you, but that's enough!" He snapped. "She's the one who so badly wanted to go at first."

At that moment I wanted to tear the King apart. I hated how he just spoke to Nori, really hated it. But there was nothing I could say. I was, after all, a mere human living as a ward in his Halls. If he wanted me gone, he just had a few words to say and I would end up out of the massive doors in a few hours. So, instead of lashing out at him, I simply stood from my seat, outwardly displaying calm features and I looked the King in the eyes.

"I'll go. Tomorrow if that's what you want. But if you believe they'll trust me…" I paused and snorted. "Then you're sadly mistaken."

At that I simply left to go back in my room. I could hear them already starting to discuss and finally yell at each other. Would they ever stop? I sat in the corner of my bed, leaning against the wall, with my legs against my chest. I rested my head on my knees, trying to think rationally and clearly about the events.

I didn't want to go but if I refused I had that feeling I wouldn't see the sky in quite awhile. After all if I said I was too afraid to go back to a normally harmless town now while escorted by three dwarves armed to the teeth, then why would they accept me going out on my own or to more dangerous parts?

Besides I did understand the King's logic. They needed to stay in the relative good graces of the men around and not respecting the contract when it had just been signed would not serve them well. After the events in that town they needed to tread carefully with these men, they needed to be diplomatic, whatever the men would say. I wasn't a diplomat, far from it, but at least I wasn't too stubborn and I didn't have this crazy habit of yelling at everyone and anyone when something displeased me. Yep, these bloody dwarves might need someone like me right now. The knowledge I might actually be useful didn't really cheer me up.

I really didn't want to go.

I sighed before perking up when I heard the door slowly creaking open. A small smile tugged at my lips when I recognized Nori's silhouette.

He shut the door closed and silently made his way towards me. Gingerly he sat next to me and gathered me in his arms. I let him do so, and if I were entirely honest with myself, I was glad he had come…and gladder still to be in his arms.

I sighed softly and shifted a bit to bring my arms around his waist, letting my head fall on his shoulder, after he lifted me and helped me sit across his lap.

We remained silent and I simply tried to appreciate the peacefulness I felt each time I was being held against his chest. Feeling his arms around me gave me strength. I could tell he was tense though, and I could only guess as to why. I tightened my hold on his waist and he responded in kind, bringing me closer still against him. I hummed a bit, feeling much better simply with him being there.

He tilted his head to let it fall on top of mine and I let my eyes flutter close.

After awhile, he decided to speak.

"I don't want you to go."

I felt his lips move against my hair, and I hummed, unsurprised by his words.

"I have to."

"You can refuse." He countered.

"Not really. I can't really disobey the King's order. Nori, the King is right. It's necessary for everyone's safety that you respect your part in the agreement quickly and diplomatically. I'm quite sure the men will not be very polite, even after the contracts have been signed."

"Still…"

"Are you trying to convince me that dwarves are famous for being amazing diplomats?"

I leaned back a bit and caught a glimpse of a smirk. This made me smile.

"That's what I thought."

He tightened his hold some more, crushing me against him but I truly didn't mind. My heart seemed to beat stronger but I chose to only concentrate on Nori for now. I didn't like seeing him so concerned and I wanted to sooth his worries.

"I'll be as safe as can be."

"We both know it isn't true." He replied in a groan.

"Nori, what would you want me to do? Remain hidden here forever?"

I felt him shrug and I sighed before talking in as calm a voice as possible, letting my friendly love for this dwarf reign over my growing exasperation; those topics were really too repetitive and those dwarves were really way too stubborn.

"Nori, I respect and appreciate your concern, I really do. But you have to understand I come from a different world where women were quite independent."

"Our world is dangerous, you've seen it yourself." He groaned.

"Nori, I'll never agree, and I really mean never, to be kept hidden behind mountain walls, prisoner in my own home."

I had whispered softly but I knew he had perfectly heard when his arms twitched and squeezed my waist a bit.

"Mizimul…" He breathed before inhaling deeply.

Hearing him use this word again made me glance up but right now we had to discuss other more pressing matters.

"You have protected me so far. You've been here for me all the time. Why shouldn't I wish to do whatever I could to help you?" I softly said before adding. "Help you all."

"Mizimul, I don't want you getting hurt…"

I don't know what possessed me to put my hand against his cheek at that moment. My palm was lightly brushing against his beard while my fingers grazed his cheekbone. I didn't stop to ponder on why I did it though and I spoke as gently and softly as I could, looking in his eyes.

"I can't promise I won't get hurt, but I promise you I'll try my best not to take any risks."

To my surprise he snorted at my words before answering.

"I think I've never met anyone who can so easily end up having troubles than you."

"Oy, I said I'll try." I replied jokingly.

We both laughed softly and it felt damn good to see Nori's worries ease a bit. Gingerly I let my hand fall back and shifted once more before putting my head against his shoulder again. He tightened his hold on me and we remained silent like this for what felt like an eternity. I knew Nori would keep on worrying but at least he wasn't going to bite everyone's head off anymore, or so I hoped.

I had hoped to be able to relax for quite some time in a bath, but it apparently wasn't meant to happen. Nope. Instead, that afternoon I received various presents from the three brothers. Well I say presents but those were useful items they threw in my arms while complaining they wouldn't have time to help me prepare properly for the trip I'll make the following day.

I now had my own leather backpack and a nice brand new bedroll. Nori had insisted on me wearing a sort of light but resistant leather tunic atop mine that'd serve as light armour. Dori and him even bought me a few other weapons and showed me how to conceal them. After a few hours my head was spinning with all their instructions and recommendations and I simply couldn't take it anymore, I looked around, trying to find help.

Ori, the smart dwarf, was observing his brothers' fussing from afar, looking quite smug at not being the one the other two fussed over. I playfully glared at him and he just smirked. The nerves…

Finally I sighed and decided to make them stop.

"Please, stop this madness."

Nori looked up at me. He was kneeling in front of me, hiding another blade in the hem of my coat. Dori was for his part adding another blanket in my bag.

"Please, I really, really appreciate you doing all this but…Nori, stop with that blade! I don't know how to use them anyway and I can barely walk without clinking as it is."

I saw him frown and he was ready to contradict me but I didn't give him the chance to do so.

"I still have the first dagger you gave me. Don't you think it's already enough for someone who doesn't know how to use it?"

He opened his mouth as if to answer, frowned some more and closed it back before finally grumbling.

"Maybe I'll have to teach you how to use those…"

My interest clearly had been caught when he said he would maybe teach me how to defend myself and I really wanted to turn his musing into a promise. But I didn't have time to answer him as Dori spoke instead.

"Amelia, we're just worried." Dori tried to explain and I had to fight back a laugh at the ridiculousness of the situation.

"Trust me Dori, I realized that. But seriously? I don't even remember where Nori hid all the blades and I don't think I'd be able to lift that bag when you'll stop adding spare clothes, blankets and whatnots." I gently chastised them.

At least they had the decency to look slightly sheepish.

"So please, can you both help me preparing for the journey and stop, just please stop, overdoing everything?"

It took us almost an hour to remove the blades Nori had hidden. Seriously how had I been supposed to find and use all those weapons? I swear he had a gift for hiding objects inconspicuously in pieces of clothing. I suddenly felt much lighter, literally much lighter once all blades were gone and Ori laughed heartily when I remarked on it loudly. Nori simply shrugged and huffed.

* * *

><p>Later that evening I lay awake on my bed, I just couldn't sleep. I was anxious about this new trip to this blasted place. I had no desire to find out whether the villagers had understood what truly happened. In my humble opinion, it was stupid to send both me and Bofur back. Though it was true that Bofur had, in the end, made a somehow good impression with his easy-going attitude, and I had been accepted as a human healer, I wasn't certain these people should be trusted.<p>

Turning once more and shifting to find a better position, I huffed in annoyance at my own brain that kept thinking about what could happen and refused to let me sleep. In the end I grumbled and ended up sitting on my bed. Maybe I should try and get something to drink? Maybe that was the solution in order to sleep…

I sighed, exasperated by my own inability to relax and I slowly stood up. I pondered for a minute about whether or not I should put on a warmer robe, but I shrugged and decided against it. It was the middle of the night, no dwarf would come and visit at such a time, and the brothers were probably asleep. And if they were not…well, they had all seen me in those long nightclothes anyway.

Silently I tiptoed to my door and noiselessly walked in the corridor. The kitchen was dark but the open door to the living room provided a little light. The fire was still burning in the hearth. I was about to take a cup when I heard the hushed voices. I hadn't paid attention at first, but now I could hear what I thought to be Dori and Nori and they seemed to be arguing about something. I frowned, wondering whether it was about Nori's unhealthy job again.

I knew I shouldn't have, but I couldn't help but to come closer to the door. I wasn't really trying to be inconspicuous and I didn't feel like I was sneaking on them. I only heard Nori's voice when I went closer to the door.

"…I'm telling you Dori. There's nothing…"

"There better not be Nori or…"

"Amelia? Is that you?" Nori interrupted his brother and I looked at him from the doorway.

Dori had turned quickly at hearing I was here and he looked at me, both kindly and surprised. Nori, on the contrary, stared fixedly at the fire still burning.

"Hey…" I lamely said.

"What are you doing here?" Dori gently asked me.

"I cannot sleep. I just wanted to have some water and I heard you were arguing. What's this about?" I glanced at the both of them and immediately saw them frown.

"Nothing much. Don't worry about it. You should go and sleep now, you'll have a tiring day tomorrow." Dori replied while walking towards me.

Nori was looking at the hearth, still frowning and I found it odd for a moment. But clearly the brothers had been talking about something they didn't want me to know about. They were entitled to have secrets between siblings, I didn't want to pry and I wouldn't.

"Yeah…I know." I grimaced and Dori smiled encouragingly at me.

His smile disappeared when he saw my attire.

"Amelia, you shouldn't walk around without a robe." He chastised and I couldn't help but blush slightly. "It's cold and really not proper."

"Sorry…" I mumbled.

Dori sighed and told me to go grab my robe while he would put some water in a pan. He helped me prepare some chamomile and stayed with me for the time it took me to drink it. I couldn't help but notice that Nori hadn't followed us to the kitchen and I could only hope he wouldn't do something stupid like, for example, disappearing for a month.

"Are you really alright?" Dori broke the silence.

I looked up and shook my head slightly.

"It doesn't matter much what I want or feel."

"It does Amelia." Dori was frowning deeply now, obviously unhappy with my words. "If you really are not feeling well about this, you should say it."

"Why didn't you tell the King about the poisoning?" I asked instead of keeping the exact same track of conversation.

Dori shrugged before replying.

"I don't know exactly. I'm not even sure he doesn't know. Balin probably told him…then maybe he didn't. Who knows about it anyway? Us three, Dís, Balin and Bofur…There's no real need for everyone to know."

I nodded, uncertain about how to feel about his words, but instead of dwelling on this I asked another question that had bugged me during the whole day.

"Why don't you come too? To Gorm I mean. You're all so worried, why not following then?"

"I wish I could." He sighed. "I cannot leave Thorin's Halls right now. Spring will soon allow us to travel to the southern lands and I have to review all the contracts and already start to prepare the deliveries."

It did make sense. Still, even though I appreciated Fili and Kili and was closer to Bofur and trusted all the three of them, I would have felt safer if Dori had been here with me.

"And what about Nori?" I asked sipping some chamomile.

"What about him?"

"Well, couldn't he come too? He's so worried, why didn't he try to follow us?"

Dori sighed and rubbed his forehead tiredly.

"You know what he does Amelia."

"You mean the fact that he's a thief?" I asked frowning too, I didn't thought much of it actually.

"Yes, because of that, I doubt that Thorin would allow him to go deal with men who already barely trust us."

It made sense. It truly did. Why would the King risk everything because of a thief? The answer was simple; he wouldn't take the risk to begin with. As much as I hated to admit it, it was clear that even the King didn't trust Nori much. I didn't like that but I could understand. Somehow I felt as if Nori was tolerated because of his brothers and who his parents were.

It hurt to think about it like that.

In the end I drank the chamomile rather quickly and quickly left Dori alone in the kitchen. As sad as it was, there was nothing I could do to help Nori. I wasn't even sure he would want to be helped.

* * *

><p>The next day I was standing in the large entrance to Thorin's Halls, facing the three brothers once more. Dori was clearly displaying his worries, Ori wasn't much better at hiding his and Nori was a perfect example of grumpiness. I smiled at them, trying to ease their concerns. I hugged them all, each one at a time, not realizing that my embrace with Nori lingered slightly more than the ones I had with the others.<p>

When I left his arms I felt suddenly colder but I brushed it off. I smiled at him and winked to try and make him smirk. It failed but well, at least I tried, right?

"Try to eat vegetables, even if I'm not here." I gently instructed.

That did it, even though he was clearly fighting it I had spotted his slight smirk. I smiled broadly at him while he made a visible effort to remain grumpy.

"The house will feel weird without you again." Ori complained.

"Try and do something to occupy your mind and hands then." It was harder to say goodbye this time and I felt a lump in my throat. I winked at Ori and told him. "How about you draw a map of Thorin's Halls for me? Like this I won't ever get lost."

Ori seemed to blush slightly at my words and avoided my gaze but I didn't understand why he would. I couldn't ask him anything though as Nori spoke.

"Do you actually know how to read a map?" Nori managed to sound doubtful, amused and grumpy. What a feat!

"Oy, I'll let you know that I'm good at reading maps." I replied, crossing my arms on my chest.

"Fine, fine." He slowly smirked. "What should I prepare for you then?"

"Be creative!" I deadpanned and warmth spread in my chest at seeing his wink.

I heard Bofur call me, telling me it was time to go already. I managed not to wince; I really didn't want the three brothers to worry too much about me. I turned one last time towards Dori and his concerned smile didn't ease the lump in my throat.

"Take care of them, alright?" I asked him, my voice turning slightly hoarse.

"I will. Come safely back to us."

I smiled sincerely at that.

"You know, I think I will. I'll come back home soon."

Dori's smile turned soft at my words and he nodded. I needed not say more, he had understood exactly what I had wanted to tell him. For better or for worse I was admitting it aloud now, this was my home. With these last parting words I left, turning away sharply, not waiting to see their looks. I reasoned that the quicker we left, the sooner we'll come back.

I felt a sharp pang in my chest when I walked away. I was missing them already. I had only been there a day and I wanted to spend more time with them. I frowned and was absolutely certain that my face reflected exactly how annoyed and upset I felt at the moment. I ended up walking in silence for awhile, not paying attention to Bofur and Fili who discussed together or Kili who walked a bit ahead of us all.

I was definitely not happy with this situation. I had hoped not to see that stupid town for quite awhile, but here I was, going straight back there. I let my thoughts remind me of the previous nights. Nori had been so nice, so helpful. He had been right too. I had to let go of my useless past. This world was so different from mine, their logic seemed so simple too, but for someone like me it truly wasn't that easy. I would love to be able to just forget my troubles. Yes, I'd love to forget about my past. But it wouldn't work; my past was what made me what I was now.

Somehow, even though I knew my father had been perceived as a failure, I had insisted on becoming a surgeon. I didn't know why and I remembered doubting myself quite a lot during my last year at uni. When I had arrived here, I had accepted to become a healer mostly because…well that was the only thing I knew how to do. That was the only thing I was. And being Oin's apprentice had helped me so much. I had discovered once more this will inside me to be a good person, to be a healer, save people. Could I consider my actions in Gorm to be a part of my will to protect and save people? Wasn't it a bit egoistical to want to save my friends first? Wasn't a healer supposed to treat everyone equally? Was I a failure like my father had been?

After probably a few hours of walking and forlorn thoughts, I stopped suddenly in the middle of the path. My companions immediately stopped too and stared at me concerned.

"What is it Meli? Are you alright?" Bofur asked me with a smile.

"We forgot the stuff we're supposed to deliver!" I said honestly surprised to be the first one to realize that.

To my utter dismay they looked at each other and started to chuckle lightly.

"Meli, we're just delivering some silver vases, plates and the likes to the town's Master. They're in mine and Fili's bags." Bofur explained.

"Oh…"

The dwarves all laughed heartily then and I felt my cheeks redden a little. It was true, I hadn't really paid attention to what Balin and the King told us and the preparations made before our departure. I had been too busy trying to stop the three brothers from fussing too much. Besides I couldn't care less about anything that concerned that disgusting master. I only knew I was supposed to follow because of my healing competencies.

We almost immediately resumed walking and I observed the landscape once more. In a month time the snow had melted a bit, the trees were now deep green instead of coated in white and shiny snow. The mountain, rocks and even the path we walked on were still covered with a white coating though. I couldn't help but enjoy the scenery but after a while I decided that looking at my three companions could be interesting too. I then observed them a little trying to be discreet.

Bofur immediately made me smile. He seemed to be on holidays, what with his hat that flapped at each of his steps, his way of whistling merry tunes and his apparent uncaring attitude about our mission. Fili seemed rather laid back too. He often joked with Bofur, though the blond dwarf clearly paid attention to his surroundings, observing more often than not his little brother.

Kili was quite the opposite. Obviously overeager to do well during this mission, he was looking around us with stern face and his hands close to his weapons. That was seriously starting to worry me. I startled violently when he drew suddenly his sword out of its sheath and then started to prowl toward a large boulder.

I glanced toward Bofur who was still lowly whistling while he waited patiently for Kili to come back to us, declaring very seriously.

"It's alright, there's no danger here."

"Sure lad, sure." Bofur simply answered already walking back on the road.

Fili simply went to put his arm around his brother's shoulder and whispered something to him with a smirk. From Kili's offended reaction, I guess Fili was teasing him for being so tense. I didn't mind though, for it was apparently Kili's very first mission with such a small group and I could understand he wanted to make things right.

A few hours later, I had enough of it all when Kili jumped to the side, sword unsheathed in a swift move for the fifth time already since we had left Thorin's Halls. Each time he startled me greatly and my poor little heart couldn't take much more of the scare.

"Kili, can you please stop being such a fidgety girl and relax a bit!" I snapped.

The part about him being a girl was probably not my best idea but Bofur intervened to smooth the edges.

"Lad, you're scaring her every time you jump like that. There's no need to be so on edge all the time."

"But what if we're ambushed?' Kili asked

"We won't be."

"But what if we are?"

"I said we won't be ambushed."

And there started the second most stupid dispute I'd ever heard, the first being the one about my nickname. Strangely Bofur had taken part in both. I sighed deeply and fell into steps with Fili who, though he was quite serious about being prudent and cautious, still smiled at me.

"Happy to be on the road again?"

"Yeah…Though to be honest I'd be happy never to step in that town ever again." I grumbled at him.

"Well you did spend a month there already. I'm sure the lovely town of Gorm doesn't have much distraction to offer." He replied lightly.

"You'd think so." I snorted. "But wherever there are dwarves, there's distraction I think."

He laughed at that and shook his head. Then he patted my shoulder before replying.

"Aye, dwarves are known for creating amazing distractions. Don't worry though; we won't stay long this time."

"I hope so. Spending almost a month there was more than enough already."

"I heard what you did." Fili said calmly. "Ma told us."

I sighed, it wasn't surprising that Dís would talk to her sons, but I just wasn't sure how to take this; did she mean well or did she warn her sons to be cautious around me? I looked at him and saw that Fili was observing me from the corner of his eye. He didn't look menacing or anything of the like though, he simply appeared rather attentive.

"She made us promise to take care of you. She was angry at uncle's behaviour. She said he was a heartless, stubborn and stupid dwarf." He chuckled a bit at the memory then continued. "She's worried about you, she's afraid you'll berate yourself endlessly for something no one else but you would deem dishonourable."

"I'm not…berating myself. I was worried about how the others would react. In my world, what I did, it isn't something natural or even remotely normal."

"But for us, what you did was a proof of your loyalty and honour."

I snorted at that and shook my head disbelievingly.

"How is it honourable to poison children?"

"It is unusual. That is true. But from what I understood, you did help and probably save the lives of the dwarves." He said remaining calm and seemingly careless, though I believed it was only a façade.

"We can't know that for sure." I insisted rather stubbornly, I'd admit that.

"No, but I'd rather never know for sure. As for my opinion, I think you're a loyal and good person. Too good maybe for our world, I'm afraid you'll suffer because of it."

Strangely when he said 'good' my mind heard 'weak'. At least that was how I felt about it; I was too weak, too helpless for this world. I had to harden and strengthen myself. Maybe that had been what he meant; that I should harden my heart, prepare myself to be obliged to act in similar ways once more.

Suddenly I didn't want to think about all that anymore. It tired me to think about this non-stop.

"Do you think there's much risk for us to be ambushed?" I chose to change the topic not really wanting to become all emotional in front of the young dwarf who was quickly and easily becoming a good friend.

Fili glanced at me and nodded, understanding obviously my need to talk about something else. I realized how serious the young dwarf could be even though he was just as cheeky as his brother. It surprised me a bit to find out that Fili was actually rather thoughtful and serious, despite being very mischievous when he was with his brother. I knew already he was a nice and reliable dwarf, but I had never seen until now his adult side. It was an interesting thing to learn about him and I was glad he let me see it.

"Honestly? I think Bofur's right. This road is used frequently, there's not much risk." He shrugged before adding with a teasing glint in his eyes. "Try to stay close though; we wouldn't want to lose you, now would we?"

"Oh I'm sure there'll be a prince around to come and rescue me." I deadpanned and he laughed.

"We'll probably be able to find one or two of those." He agreed smiling.

"Do you think they'll have white horses and shining armours?"

That seemed to puzzle him and we soon ended up in an easy discussion about fairy tales from my previous world and tales from this land. It was fun to listen to tales of Durin and other famous dwarves and I was happy that Fili liked some of the tales I told him. He particularly enjoyed the Disney story of Sleeping Beauty, but I guess that was mainly because the witch-turned-dragon ended up slain by the prince.

All in all we spent a good time. This journey promised to be entirely different than the previous one. Bofur was clearly the only experienced dwarf but he wasn't grumpy or deadly serious like Dwalin was. Quite the contrary actually. We spent more time laughing at jokes or at Bofur's improvised stories than anything else. I could really start to believe we were just going on a walk, not on a mission. And without me realizing it, these three dwarves managed to make me forget my troubling thoughts for awhile.

Kili after having been chastised had finally managed to relax and was back to his usual cheery self. It was still obvious he wanted nothing more than to prove his uncle that he and his brother were perfectly able to go on missions, but he didn't jump at each moving bush anymore.

Fili and I spent most of the day talking together though, and we had a good time asking each other questions about our lives. The only highlight of our afternoon happened thanks to him too. The idiot asked me how old I actually was, explaining it was difficult for him to guess when humans were concerned. Once I told him I was still twenty five he laughed loudly.

"Oy, what's so funny lad?" Bofur asked then, turning around as he and Kili were walking slightly ahead.

"Did you know that our Meli is only 25?" Fili chuckled while patting my shoulder.

"What? No way! Why did uncle let you go out on the previous missions! It's so unfair!" Kili immediately complained as I blushed.

"Oh, stop it! What are you, twelve?" I retorted at him as he pouted like a child.

"Actually he's 75." Bofur stated simply.

My eyes widened and I stumbled on my own feet before falling face first to the ground with a yelp. Thankfully Fili was close by and had very good reflexes. I ended up in his arms.

"See, told you you'd need a dwarf prince at some point." He teased but I didn't react.

"How…How can you be so old and so…" I blurted out looking at Kili who gloated.

"Handsome? Strong? Smart?" He provided with a toothy and smug grin.

"…so childish."

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><p><strong>AN: Huge thanks to all the reviewers :D Thank you again Mary (good luck with your new semester! And really thank you for the kind words, it cheers me up a lot to read from you.), and thanks to the nameless guest too. And thanks to all the new readers/followers and other favorites that were added. Thanks everyone for the support! (that's a lot of thanks...^^)**

**I know some of you want Nori and Amelia to just get together, but please, be patient. I swear they'll come together...Eventually. **

**As for this chapter... I know most of you will be angry that she's away once more ^^ yep, but please don't kill me. . . It won't take long before she's back and I promise some very nice and long chapters with lots and lots of Nori. **

**As for this chapter, well... I did try to keep it light and with still a good part of Ri brothers' action. Still, I wanted to develop a bit Fili and Kili's characters and well... I guess you'll see what else in a few chapters.**

**Yep.. the surprise wasn't a good one (for you all) as it's Amelia's second departure :) But I swear it's all part of a logical plot (sort of). **

**I know that Thorin might appear a bit cranky and antagonistic here, but I always saw his character as a mix of nice and honorable moments with lots of pride, stubbornness and anger...So I'm trying to keep it that way in this fic. besides...he IS the King, so he's entitled to order people around.**

**Well, I'll post the next chapter later this week (I'll try to keep updating every two/three days.) So that means either Thursday or Friday. **

**Thanks for your support! I hope not to disappoint anyone. **


	20. Of Dwarves and Men

**Everything belongs to JRR Tolkien except for my OC and the plot.**

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><p>The first day of our journey went by relatively uneventfully after Bofur and Kili's silly banter and after Kili had stopped pouting about the adjectives I had used to describe him. Late in the afternoon, Bofur decided to camp under large pine trees. There was barely any snow under the trees and we used the dried needle-shaped leaves to light a fire quickly. Soon we were gathered around nicely warm flames. This time it was Kili who disappeared for a while behind the trees and came back maybe an hour later with two rabbits that were thankfully already dead. He immediately handed them to me and I bit my tongue for a minute, trying to stop my rant about how rude it was for him to assume I would cook.<p>

Well, biting my tongue didn't work and soon I was ranting at a dismayed Kili while I quickly skinned and prepared the rabbit in the way Balin had shown me. He shouldn't think that because I was a woman, I would cook for them, as if it were my predetermined job just because of my gender. Fili and Bofur were sitting nearby, both smoking and smirking as Kili seemed a bit lost.

"But, you're doing it anyway…so why do you complain?" He asked stupefied.

I frowned then, realizing he was right. Even though I was currently telling him that there was no such thing as women's jobs or men's jobs, I was currently doing exactly what he had expected me to do; prepare the food and cook it while the men smoked and waited.

"It's a question of principle." I blurted out and heard two snorts before I glared at Bofur and Fili.

That did stop me though and I quickly put the two pieces of meat on sticks Fili had previously cut and cleaned of their barks before I put them over the fire to roast. Even though we had food with us, it was logical that we would instead try to eat fresh meat and keep the dried one in our backpacks for emergency cases.

During that evening, Bofur decided it'll do us good to keep watch and I was given the last one, simply because I was the only one unable to discern how much time had passed with the movements of the stars.

"Even you can't miss the sun rising." Bofur had bluntly said with a smirk.

I chose not to get offended, though I really wished to whack him at the time. Yet even I could admit that my internal clock was probably as good as my natural direction sense. Besides I was quite happy to be trusted with such a thing. During my first travel to Gorm with Balin, Dwalin and the merchants, I hadn't even been offered the possibility to do it. The dwarves had either assumed I wouldn't want to do it, or that I wouldn't be able to do it. In any case it would be my very first watch that night and already wondered how it would go.

As Kili settled on a boulder for the first watch, I lay down on the ground, under a tree and on a soft mattress of needle-shaped leaves that provided a nice alternative to sleeping on the rocky and cold ground. As I lay there, watching the sky through the branches of the tree, I took a moment to simply appreciate the calm of the forest. I wasn't happy about going back to that village, I was a bit upset about leaving the three brothers behind once more, I was still anxious and nervous about the poisoning, but that night, I just let it all go for a few delightful minutes. For a short time there was just me, lying on the floor in my warm bedroll, the forest around and the endless sky.

Well that lasted for all but a few minutes really as a weird noise brought me out of my reveries. I could hear Bofur's loud snores and they seemed to completely occult the noises nature could have made. I smiled and softly drifted into sleep, tired after a whole day of walking.

When Bofur woke me, the night was dark and the fire we had built was barely lit.

"Wake up lass, your turn now."

I resisted the urge to grumble and had to think hard in order to remember that I was glad I was allowed to do such a thing as keeping watch. I wanted to sleep some more. Just a few more hours, surely that would be fine? Well no. I had duties. Being torn away from my warm bedroll was pure torture as I felt the crisp air of the night. I shivered and hastily fastened my warm coat before walking towards the embers of the fire and trying to catch a bit of its warmth.

"Do you have any idea how to keep a watch?" Bofur whispered after following me to the fire.

"Well…I sit and…watch?" I yawned, uncertain of the correct answer.

He chuckled and shook his head.

"You have to keep yourself occupied, do something with your hands to keep your mind awake. Listen to the sounds around, don't hesitate to stand up from time to time to wake your legs and muscles, and warm up a bit but don't go away from the camp. Never. If you start feeling too cold, walk, jump, do whatever you want to keep warm. Alright? "

I nodded, serious, and was already trying to think about what I could do to stay awake. Thinking about Ori's gift, I smiled to myself, now seemed a good time to continue writing in my notebook. I was slowly starting to feel warmer thanks to the fur in my coat and the multiples layer of clothing I was wearing.

"If your instincts start to kick in and tell you something's up, come and wake me. Don't hesitate. I'd rather be woken up because of an owl than because a fight started and I was asleep. Understood?" Bofur continued.

"I promise I won't hesitate. I'd rather you mock me during the whole trip than have us all dead because I didn't feel like waking you up."

"Good." He said before adding with a softer smile. "Don't worry lass. This area is quite safe really."

"Quite?" I asked, smirking.

"Aye, you can't ask for too much. Besides, it's part of the fun of any journey." He walked to his bedroll when I asked.

"What is a part of the journey's fun?"

"The uncertainty"

On those motivating thoughts he turned his back to me and was soon snoring happily once more. It was quite impressive, really, to hear them all snore so loudly. I wondered whether the sound would scare animals away.

I stood up from my seat near the fire and walked a bit around the camp to warm and wake my body a bit. Dori and Nori had given me a nice fur lined coat and leather gloves to wear on top of woollen mittens. Ori had also gifted me with a thick and warm woollen scarf. All in all I really was far from freezing, still the air had this crisp quality that forced me to rub my nose when I felt it go numb.

I rummaged through my bag to pick the notebook given by Ori and decided to lean against a fallen log close enough to the fire for me to see its slightly yellowy pages. At first I didn't even think about what to write, I just looked through the previous entries, reminding myself what I had felt during the previous month in that town. I hadn't written anything related to the poisoning though, and honestly I didn't plan to write about it at all. Maybe I should have used the time I had now, being alone in a peaceful area, to try and think about these events, but I didn't feel like spoiling the calm of the night with such thoughts. My hand picked up the pencil I had left between two pages and I wrote about Bofur and Kili's quarrel. About Fili and mine discussion, about my surprise at hearing Kili's age and mostly I wrote about Bofur's advices and what I felt like during my first watch ever.

Which truly was nothing much, because nothing really happened…

The night was peaceful and the cold air kept me awake. The sounds of wildlife were muffled by the snow coating the mountains' rocks and the forest around was silent too. Everything felt incredibly calm and hadn't I had Ori's notebook, I would probably have been fast asleep half an hour after the beginning of my watch.

I had thought it would be stressful, it was actually quite boring.

Not even an owl hooted to startle me.

The hours passed slowly, painfully so, and I ended up watching the stars and thinking of home. And by home I meant Thorin's Halls. My thoughts about my previous world were becoming few and far between, the good memories fading in my mind to just be that, memories. I had given up the idea of ever going back there, I wasn't even sure that if I had the possibility to, I would leave this place. Despite the hardship, the difficulties, I had found here something I never had, and probably never would have, in my previous world; companionship.

I tore away from those thoughts and looked up.

As the sky started to lighten at the horizon, I decided to go and wake the three sleepyheads who were still snoring. I was bored and wanted nothing more than to start again with that day's journey, even though I wasn't really eager to be back in Gorm.

"So, that first watch?" Fili yawned in my direction immediately after he sat up on his bedroll.

"What of it?" I asked while putting some log in the fire and water to warm in a pan on top of it.

"Weren't you too scared or worried?" Kili enquired rubbing his eyes like a child would.

"Are you joking? It was just boring. Really, really boring. I have been thinking about faking worry and wake you all up so that we'll have an early start. Be thankful I didn't, or we'd be far by now." I ranted, smiling to let them know I was joking.

"Pay up lads, told you she was a tough lass our Meli." Bofur said, laughing while both Fili and Kili grumbled.

"You put bets on me?" I was astounded.

"Yes."

They answered in a chorus and I narrowed my eyes at them, at Bofur specifically who was now happily bouncing a small clinking pouch in his hand.

"What?" He smirked at me.

"Bofur, I want a share of that profit made on my name. If you don't pay up, I swear I'll go to both Balin and Dori. I'm sure they'll find something in their contracts with me that allow them to beat you to a pulp if you don't pay me my share."

Kili and Fili stared at me wide eyed while Bofur let a loud bark of laughter. To tell the truth, I wasn't sure why it mattered to me but it felt incredibly unfair that they would earn money thanks to me and not share the profit. Well, even if it wasn't thanks to me exactly, still, I had been the object of the bet and only for this, I deserved some payment. Bofur laughed for a long minute before he reached for the pocket in which he had put the gold that had just been earned. I saw a glint when the piece of metal caught a ray of sun and startled a bit when Bofur threw me two coins that I struggled to catch.

"Here lass, for your cheek only. You've got the mind of a dwarf, if nothing else."

"Oy, I resent that!"

We all laughed together and I happily pocketed my money, feeling cheerful just because it was my money. Not Nori's or Dori's or Ori's. Mine. Alright it hadn't been earned through hard work but still, those were my very first silver coins.

They all chuckled at my obviously content and smug face and that day started with everyone in a good mood.

It was fun being outside with Bofur, Fili and Kili. The three of them enjoyed bantering together and most of all they loved to bet about anything which promised a lot of money exchanges during the journey. And I wasn't the last to bet.

At the end of the third day, when we came in sight of our destination, I had five silver coins in my pocket and even a gold one.

I wasn't half bad at betting and the other had even agreed I'd make a good dwarf if I kept on like this.

* * *

><p>It was early afternoon when we arrived in sight of the lovely, oh so lovely town of Gorm. The fields around were just as muddy as I remembered and the houses looked just as dingy as they had before. I sighed at the sight, already thinking about when we'll be leaving. Would it be polite to just throw the objects at the master's face and then run away? Well, probably not. Especially not if I was supposed to check my previous victims' health… I managed not to cringe at the thought, which was an exploit, and calculated that we probably would have to stay around until the next day at least.<p>

When we entered the town, I immediately felt that something was amiss. I managed to catch a glimpse of some people I could recognize but none of them moved toward us. If anything they ran away quickly, entering their houses and closing the doors. Were we back to this now? It didn't make sense. I frowned and started to feel uneasy. These people knew we were supposed to arrive, they knew I was supposed to be here too, though they really couldn't see I was here under all the layers of clothes I had. Between the large scarf and my purple hood, only my eyes were visible. Still they shouldn't have reacted in such a … terrified way.

It didn't make sense…

We were approximately halfway to the master's house now and still no one had greeted us. Only then did I realize something new. There were several men around who observed us with dark glares and had overall a different appearance; they were wearing dark leather clothes that, though they were dirty too, seemed in a slightly better condition than the peasants' garments. I tensed when I saw that they also had swords and other weapons. I frowned and was suddenly really anxious to leave this place. The villagers had no weapon; they had used pitchforks the last time.

I saw two of these men gesture harshly to a family to go back inside their house. These newcomers looked healthier and far more dangerous than the town's folks. They didn't seem to belong here at all and I couldn't remember ever seeing any of them before. My instincts were screaming at me to run at their sight.

I didn't know whether they had sensed my anxiety or whether they simply reacted on instinct too, but the three dwarves suddenly stepped closer to me, circling me, Fili's and Kili's shoulders touching mine. Bofur was just a step ahead of us.

I nudged Bofur a bit and said in a whisper.

"Bofur do they look…normal?"

I didn't need to precise that I was talking about the weird, dark clothed men.

"Not really, no…" He answered lowly and I barely managed to hear him even though the whole town was eerily silent.

"I don't like them." I added glancing at a very tall and scary looking man.

"We don't either." Fili whispered too.

"We do our business quickly and leave in the hour." Bofur decided, clearly dismissing the fact I was supposed to check on the sick people. "Lads, keep close to Amelia."

Both Fili and Kili nodded and I could see the deep frowns on their face and the tension in their shoulders. The fact that Bofur had just used my name, and not the nickname he'd chosen for me and used incessantly in the past days, was quite informative as to the seriousness of the situation.

Now wasn't the time to joke anymore.

Between my thoughts and observations of the people around, we had arrived to the large house that belonged to the master without me noticing. Bofur quickly climbed the stairs two by two and we followed. It took me just a brief look above my shoulder to understand something was terribly wrong.

I discreetly put my left hand on Fili's forearm and squeezed it to gain his attention and he sent me a questioning look. Turning my head a bit I simply glanced behind me once more when I was sure he was observing me. I felt him tense under my fingers, knowing perfectly he had peeked around and registered the same information I had.

The women, children and even most of the men had all but disappeared from the streets and the only men left had been gathering in a loose half-circle that was slowly tightening around us and the master's house. I could tell there were a small dozen of them. Unsurprisingly they were the ones with weapons and wearing the dark clothes.

I shivered.

Something was terribly, terribly wrong.

I heard Fili mutter something in Khuzdul and knew from their tensed shoulders that both Kili and Bofur had understood the situation. Fili moved down one step, imperceptibly placing himself behind me and I knew he was ready to push me away if something were to happen; meanwhile Bofur was knocking at the closed door, waiting for someone to come greet us.

I concentrated on the feeling of Nori's cold and hard dagger pressed against my calf, in my right boot, and it calmed my mind a bit. Somehow I hadn't expected to potentially use this blade against men. It would never have crossed my mind that I might have to defend myself against people; I thought if I ever were to use it, it'd be against some wild animal. I knew that I should have prepared myself for this, after all my experience so far with men of this world wasn't really positive. Right now I wondered whether I would have to actually try and defend my life with such a small blade. I clenched my teeth, I wasn't stupid, if a fight started, I'd die or be captured as soon as my friends wouldn't be able to defend me. I had no illusions about this.

The door finally creaked open and a tall, thin and creepy man looked down his nose at us. I usually already hated how men appeared gigantic compared to us but this one was worse; he was taller than most men around, I could tell, and there was something about him, that made my instincts scream. He had dirty, brown hair and his nose had been broken and badly reset. The worst part of his face though was the long scar that marred his cheek and cut the corner of his lips, forcing his face into a disgusting, fiendish one sided smirk. I shivered at the sole sight of this man.

"What business do you have here, dwarf?" He asked in an incredibly hostile tone though I saw him smirk.

"We're here to see the master of this town. He requested a delivery of some of our products." Bofur answered evenly.

"The old master's dead. You're dealing with me now."

A sense of imminent danger crept in me and I held my breath. Something was wrong here, definitely wrong. Then I realized that the hate I saw in all their eyes was the kind you directed towards enemies. Did these men think we were enemies? It didn't make sense, did it? For my part I had never met them, and from the look of it, they didn't know Bofur, Fili or Kili either. Besides we weren't doing anything wrong, we had just come to uphold our part of the contract.

"That's unfortunate." Bofur replied calmly, impressing me. "If no one else wants to buy the items, then we'll be leaving now."

He was about to take a step back when the creepy man's voice stopped him.

"No. No you don't, thief."

I blinked. What did he just say? Why did he say that? The smirk he sported was simply frightening and I wondered whether he was mad.

There was no time to question his words, for as soon as he had pronounced them he unsheathed an unfairly long sword. Bofur, Fili and Kili jumped into action.

We were still in the middle of the stairs but I was now crushed between their backs as they were each facing different directions. I hadn't even had the time to register that they had unsheathed their own weapons.

"You think you can best us dwarf?" The man sniggered darkly.

Bofur's hammer was directed to the creepy guy upstairs, while Kili now held one long sword, well long for a dwarf, and Fili had one sword in each of his hands. The men had taken a few steps back at the sight of the weapons, but it was quite obvious they were still planning on fighting us. I should say that the three dwarves looked incredibly fierce and deadly serious, had I had the time, I'd have felt impressed, really.

At the moment though, my mind was busy with other matters; I was trying to count how many of them there were when Bofur whispered to us.

"When they attack, Kili I want you to take Amelia and run outta here."

"I won't leave you…" Kili started to protest voicing my own thoughts in the process.

"You take her, protect her and that's final lad." Bofur snapped, still whispering.

"Do it Kili. It's our duty to protect her first, brother. We promised."

Fili's whisper was apparently enough to make Kili obey, for when the men decided to spring into action, Bofur quickly managed to push the man we'd talk to down the stairs before yelling something in Khuzdul. For my part I had just enough time to register that the horrid man wasn't blocking the door anymore. I didn't even attempt to follow what Bofur and Fili where doing, and didn't even realize that Bofur was talking to Kili and me while fighting off some men who were trying to attack us.

I was astounded and my brain apparently wasn't able to comprehend what was happening around.

I heard the older dwarf bark something in my direction but I was frozen. The order had barely left Bofur's lips though, that Kili was turning away from the men coming at us. He grabbed my wrist with his left hand and ran upstairs with me, forcing me to follow him and rushing me through the door, straight to the back of the house.

I was on autopilot, entirely unable to process the information provided by my brain.

Fili and Bofur were shouting in Khuzdul, I could hear the sounds of metal clanking violently against metal, I could feel Kili's hand squeezing my wrist tightly, I could feel my legs move and my heart beat wildly. But it was all so surreal that I ended up just following Kili like a puppet. He rushed me straight through a long corridor towards the back of the house, kicking a door open with his foot.

In a matter of seconds really, we were in front of a window that was facing empty fields and a bit further away a pine forest. Without hesitation, Kili broke the window with his elbow, sheathed his sword back in its scabbard and jumped on the windowsill, turning to offer me his hand.

"Quick Amelia, we need to jump down."

I took his hand and obeyed simply because I was currently unable to take any decision on my own.

We both jumped together and I fell ungracefully on the ground, feeling incredibly grateful that I hadn't broken my ankles after that jump. I didn't even have the time to shake myself away from my stupor before Kili's hand was already on my wrist. He pulled me up to my feet with a quick tug on my arm before breaking into a mad run in the direction of the forest.

We crossed the field, stumbling on the uneven ground, leaving the battle shouts far behind us. Kili directed us to the forest and soon we were slaloming between trees, jumping over fallen logs, avoiding bushes and boulders covered in slippery moss. My back pack was hitting my waist at each bounce, sending shards of pain up my spine every time something hard in it would dig in my back. My heavy coat and warm scarf were now more hindering than helping. My lungs burnt like they had never burn before, my legs were not faring much better and my heart rate was skyrocketing. Kili ran fast, much faster than me, and I knew I was slowing him down. Still, he never let go of my wrist and kept balancing me every time I stumbled. Hadn't it been for him, I would have fallen numerous times.

We ran for a long time, it truly felt like an eternity, my wrist still in his hold and when Kili decided we were far enough from town he slowed our pace before we finally stopped. I was out of breath, taking large gulps of air into my lungs. My legs were burning and trembling while my feet were in a really poor state. Nausea kicked in too at some point and I had to concentrate in order not to be sick right here and there.

I let my bag fall on the ground and jerkily untangled my scarf from around my neck before I bent in half, trying to catch my breath. I pressed my hands on my knees, willing the shaking of my limbs to stop.

Nothing was worse though, than the fear in my heart and the pain I felt at the thought of our friends we had so cowardly left behind. I squeezed my eyes shut, desperately trying to stop tears from gathering in my eyes, still I could feel that some of them ran down my cheeks.

After a few minutes with only our heaving and panting to break the silence around I finally looked up at Kili.

I'm quite sure both our faces reflected perfectly what we were both feeling; astonishment, pain, fright, a touch of despair and a big dollop of guilt.

Kili was pale and his eyes were displaying how difficult it was for him to process the situation.

On my part, I was finally starting to put the events in order and analyze them. Facing Kili who remained silent I decided to speak but he beat me to it.

"What was that?" he whispered disbelievingly.

I had the feeling he didn't really see me right now. He raised one of his hands to his forehead and I could see he was entirely unable to process what had happened, what was happening. Honestly I wasn't doing much better.

"Kili?" I managed to breathe out between two gasps.

He didn't answer but I insisted, I had to bring him out of his torpor.

"Kili, we can't stay here, we've got to do something. Kili!" I didn't dare to shout, what if those creepy people had followed us and were trailing us now? I glanced around, fear growing tenfold in my heart.

I shook my head, I was entirely unable to tell whether anyone had followed us. Looking at Kili I winced at how unresponsive he was right now. In the end I had to slap him in order to wake him out of his daze. He finally looked at me and I muttered an apology before asking him.

"What do we do now?"

"I don't know. It's Fili. It's always Fili who … Oh Mahal Fili, my brother … Nadad… Nadad…" He whispered forlornly.

It broke my heart to see him like that. It broke it even more to think of our friends. I felt my eyes burn and I just knew I had to concentrate on something really quickly or I'd end up sobbing on the ground. I swallowed thickly and clenched my fists. Both of us needed to gather our wits or this would end badly for everyone. Kili was hiding his face behind his hands, whispering his brother's name in a broken hearted litany.

"Kili!" I snapped. "Focus!"

Finding him looking so broken, so lost, I felt my chest constrict. Apparently having to run away while his brother fought to protect us wasn't something he accepted easily. I really couldn't begrudge him for that. Actually I could easily understand it and empathise. It felt already awful for me and Bofur and Fili were just my friends, not my family. I squeezed my eyes shut for a second. It hadn't been hard to understand that they had ordered Kili to take me away for both our protection. Kili was the youngest, and was one of the heirs, one of the two brothers had to survive and remained free and I couldn't imagine Fili running away, leaving his little brother to fend for himself.

I turned away and blinked back tears. Fili was the kind to sacrifice everything for his brother and I simply couldn't think about what might have happened to him and Bofur. I didn't even want to believe they might be dead right now.

They couldn't be...

They couldn't!

Swallowing back the large lump in my throat I faced Kili once more and found him sitting on the floor, head hidden behind his large hands.

I kneeled next to him and pulled him in a tight hug. We clearly both needed it at that moment because he hugged me back as tightly as I held him. Trying to calm my nerves I forced my mind to display thoughts of a warm home with plush carpets, comfy wooden chairs and laughs, lots of laughs. Then I thought about a warm chest and strong arms that held me when I was afraid. I really missed Nori right now. I wished he was there to tell me everything would be alright.

I let my mind fill with thoughts of him. What was he doing? Was he off to search for those items he had been looking for? Was he still in Thorin's Halls? I wished he was there right now; somehow I was certain he would know what to do. I was sure Nori would already have dozen of plans right now; he was a dwarf and a thief, surely that was a deadly combination.

The cold and hard blade I could feel hidden in my boot was strangely soothing; it was a little part of Nori. Clenching my teeth for a minute I took my time to calm my own reeling feelings and clear my mind. I needed to focus if I wanted to analyze clearly what had happened.

The men had looked angry, hateful and different. They seemed to believe that something was our fault. The creepy man had been the first one to attack, signalling the right moment to the others who had waited until then so he quite obviously was the chef of the group, the new town master too. I absentmindedly wondered whether they had knowingly set a trap to attack us or if they had just used the opportunity. Were the men around so hateful of dwarves that they would hire people to kill us?

I freed Kili from my hug and frowned before asking him.

"Kili, these men, did they look normal to you?"

Kili seemed puzzled by my question, clearly not understanding why I would ask such a thing when two of our dearest friends, one being his brother, were potentially dead.

"Kili, please answer. I've basically no knowledge about this world. Did these men look like normal villagers would? Did they act normally for peasants?" I highly doubted that they were peasants, but I really wanted, no needed, Kili to confirm it.

"No, well, not really." He stuttered before developing a bit more. "They didn't look like farmers, that's for sure. Farmers around here don't really use forged weapons."

"So you think they aren't from around here?"

"I don't know." Kili frowned. "Probably not. They were trained and clearly organized. Peasants don't fight like that."

I frowned some more, feeling like I was onto something with the trail my thoughts were taking. Still, something was lacking. There had been something fishy going on in that town and the words of that man were not the only odd thing I had noticed. But as Kili said, these men were trained. Had they been called by the town's people after the town's master death? Had they planned all along to attack us? Had they only acted as if they were interested by the contract?

"Kili, where do town's people find money?" I asked him.

"What? I don't care about…" Kili angrily replied.

"Kili, please, it's important. Answer me."

He glared at me before snapping his answer.

"I don't know. They probably sell a part of their production, trade furs and leather. This kind of stuff…"

"How could they…" I let in a whisper not finishing my sentence aloud.

Kili sent me a questioning look, clearly not understanding what had me so puzzled and perplexed.

"So, could they have been hired to attack us…how much would it cost to hire such people?" I wondered to myself before turning once more toward Kili. "Kili didn't you think the town's folk looked weird too? Scared? And the…" I couldn't finish before he snarled.

"Why would I bloody care about that Amelia?! I'll burn their damn town down to ashes if I could!" His anger exploded in my face. "They bloody killed Fili! They killed my brother…"

His sudden fury left him almost immediately and the sob that shook him then broke my heart. I hugged him tightly once more, tears in my eyes and quickly whispering.

"Kili, I really don't think they killed Fili and Bofur. I might have an idea as to why they attacked us."

Kili pushed me away, holding me at arms' length, his hands on my shoulders.

"What?"

"Remember how they looked like? How you said that they were probably not peasants? And I really can't remember seeing any one of them before. Would it be so far-fetched to think they are some kind of mercenaries? They called us thieves…maybe the peasants thought we were stealing their money. Maybe they thought our prices were too high?"

"The trades were legit. The prices are really low and we barely gain anything from our sales. They really had no reasons to…" He defended.

"Kili, I know that. Well, I didn't know per se, but I know we're not thieves. But remember the words of the man."

"What are you trying to say?" Kili frowned.

"I'm starting to think these men believe we unfairly stole their money. And I don't believe they killed Bofur and Fili because it'll be in their best interest to use them as hostages and ask us to pay them if we want them back." I quickly whispered.

"What?" He looked completely lost then.

"Kili, they'll probably ask for ransom. These men were probably hired, but I guess hiring so many of them cost quite more than buying some tools from us. The only way they would manage to earn some money is by stealing the products we delivered and using the dwarves as hostages."

Kili stared at me wide eyed. His eyebrows knitted in a deep frown and I stayed silent, giving him the time to think about my words. I couldn't say I was a hundred percent sure I was right, but considering the situation and Kili's words, I thought my logic was sound enough.

At any rate I was hoping I was right simply because I didn't want to even start to think about the consequences if I wasn't.

The simple thought of them both being… No I couldn't bear it. Even the simple thought of them being … my stomach churned violently and I had to focus on Kili to try and forget my anxiety.

"You, you really think they're both alright?" Kili sounded like a child at the moment, clearly not daring to hope but unable to accept what could happen if he didn't hope for the best.

"I'm not sure Kili. They might be hurt, because I don't think they'd let themselves be caught without a fight. But I really think there's a possibility they're at least alive."

Kili nodded, not really cheered up by my uncertainty.

"Those men didn't look like they belonged." I whispered trying to convince both myself and Kili that my theory was sound.

After a few minutes, Kili spoke too, frowning deeply and obviously trying to analyze the events.

"You're right. They looked more like mercenaries than town folks. They had forged weaponry too, those are expensive and this town has no forge. They came from elsewhere."

"So then it's really likely that the town folks hired them to trap us?" I wasn't really cheered by the news.

Even the prospect of my friends being alive, though in the hands of mercenaries, didn't lighten my mood. I felt my heart drop to my stomach, what could two of us do against trained mercenaries? What could a young dwarf and an untrained, helpless human girl do against a dozen well trained mercenaries?

"Probably." Kili forlornly answered before frowning. "But why would they hire people if they already have not enough money to pay us?"

Kili repeated my previous thoughts but right now we were both in such a state that having trouble to think in a logical and straight way was almost normal.

"Maybe they'll be paid after…" I didn't have to add after what exactly they'd be paid. "In such a case, then my idea that Fili and Bofur would be alive is almost certainly right. They'd need the ransom to pay the mercenaries."

We both looked at each other and I just knew that the lights of hope shining in his brown eyes were glinting in mine too. Yes, with this theory we could really hope that both Bofur and Fili were alive. I'd rather believe in that than think about what else might have happened. After several minutes I shook myself out of the torpor I seemed to keep falling in.

"So. What do we do now?" I asked once more.

"I'm not sure, I'm…usually Fili…" Kili lowered his head, whispering brokenly again.

I put both my hands on Kili's cheeks and forced him to look me in the eyes once more.

"Kili. You're not alone in this, but you are the one in charge. I can't really take any decisions; remember this isn't my world, I might have adapted to life in Thorin's Halls, but this is beyond my competencies. You're the one who knows most about mercenaries, weapons and fights. You can do this. Fili needs you to do this. Bofur needs you to do this and I need you to do this too. We all trust you Kili and I'm sure that the two of us can find a way to rescue them."

I honestly wasn't as confident as I tried to appear but right now, Kili didn't need me to voice my fears and doubts. He visibly gulped and took a deep breath. He opened back his eyes after having closed them for a minute.

"Alright" He sounded much more confident right now which lifted my spirit. "First we need to know where they're being held prisoner. We have to find out a place to hide too, they're probably going to hunt us down."

"We have to get more information. Maybe this can be solved diplomatically. Is there another town nearby enough where people could maybe help us?"

"I wouldn't risk it. Men will not side with us. No one ever sides with us when we have problems; they only know how to come to us when they need our help or our talents." He sounded extremely bitter.

He was probably right. Men around didn't really express much patience and kindness towards the dwarves. I had witnessed it firsthand, but now wasn't really the right moment to ponder on this. I was quite certain that whatever we planned, we couldn't actually do anything until we either had information or someone working for us inside this town.

"We need information from the inside of that blasted town." I insisted.

"I'm telling you, no one around here would help a dwarf in need. They'd catch us and deliver us to these peasants before we even have the time to open our mouths. They don't help dwarves. No one helps dwarves." He persisted.

Honestly I was entirely convinced he was right. One of my first idea was to try and contact one of the people I had … hem … healed, and ask them to return the favour by giving me the information I wanted and needed. But there were several problems with this idea. First, it might take more time because it would first require me to try and locate one of those persons before contacting him or her. Then I would have to negotiate with said person before finally waiting for who knew how long to get what I wanted. And this would only work if the peasant I chose trusted me enough, which was already quite optimistic. Besides I had already traded my healing skills with them, technically they didn't owe me anything anymore. Well except the fact that they had broken the contract by attacking us…but I wasn't even sure it was the case; none of the town's folks had taken part in the fight.

I stifled an annoyed groan and repeated Kili's words in my head. 'No one helps dwarves.' Those were his exact words. 'No one helps dwarves.'

That was a risky thought but I had to voice it.

"Alright. But I'm not a dwarf…" A plan was forming in my mind already.

His eyed widened slightly and he looked frightened for a second. We remained silent for a moment, me thinking hard to try and develop the plan and him shaking his head and looking scared of me for a minute. I was already standing back up and he followed me, catching my wrist to force me to look at him.

"Nuh uh, no way I'm letting you go in that town alone." Kili had apparently caught on my trail of thoughts.

"Kili, it's actually perfect. I'd be able to get the information we need, I might even find out what actually happened there."

I won't lie, I was quite enthusiast about my little idea. I was happy to finally be able to concentrate on something. I wasn't really the kind of person to sit and watch. Not that I was prone to action either but still; being a surgeon, here a healer, meant having to act under pressure. It meant finding solution to life threatening problems. Somehow the situation we were in reminded me of that, except that instead of having to fight against time, viruses and medical complications, I would here have to fight against time and men.

I was already trying to map out in my mind how I could potentially infiltrate that town. Kili on the other hand was busy shaking his head wildly, obviously showing his discontent at my plan.

"They would kill me if I let that happen." Kili whined.

I didn't need him to be more specific, he obviously thought about the three brothers and probably Bofur and Fili as well as potentially every male dwarf of Thorin's Halls.

"Silly Kili, nobody would dare to kill you, besides they love you too much for that."

I grabbed my abandoned back pack and started to walk in the general direction whence we had come from, smiling softly at hearing Kili hiss.

"You're planning my death woman!" I turned to face him, fists on my hips.

"Look Kili, we have two options here. Either we do something or we ran back to Thorin's halls. You choose."

I knew that I was outwardly rather confident and calm. If I were honest though, I would recognize that I was probably as scared as Kili was right now. I knew this idea was dangerous. I wasn't stupid to think it wasn't. If we were to act on that plan, it would be a gamble. It was like playing poker; right now, we had no ace in hand and had to resort to bluff. The only thing that kept me together was the thought that we had no other choice and that wasting time might prove deadly for Bofur and Fili. Thankfully one of my few qualities was that I was able to think under pressure.

Kili was still thinking about it, I could almost see the wheels turning in his head. He took a moment, looking uncertain, before he frowned and answered.

"Alright, alright, we do something. But can we please at least think this through and bother make an actual sound plan. I know I'm supposed to be reckless, but there's a limit to everything…" He was pulling a face, obviously not convinced this was the best solution.

"Sure, now come on, let's go." I said, trying to sound confident. I heard him sigh loudly.

"Meli…"

"Yes?" I looked over my shoulder to see him point at our right.

"It's that way."

I blushed and it made him smirk. At least both of us were able to remain a bit positive even when facing some problems. That was a good thing, wasn't it? We started to walk but we hadn't been on the way for five minutes before Kili grabbed my wrist and forced me to stop.

"What is it now?" I whispered to him.

"Meli, how do you plan on going in this town unrecognized? The entire town's people know you already…"

"I wasn't. I thought…" And then I stopped.

Why hadn't I thought of that? If these people had hired mercenaries to attack us, why would any of them help me? The stakes just rose dramatically. The danger was more important than I had thought.

Damn…

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><p><strong>AN: As always, I want to express my thanks to the reviewers/followers/favourites and readers in general :) The nice comments I receive are really amazing. Thank you to everyone for your interest in this story!**

**Mary :) Your review truly made me smile, I hope this chapter wasn't updated during one of your class ;) And I hope that you enjoyed this chapter too! Thanks again for your support!**

**Nameless Guest/ and all the other who wonders about that too: I probably won't do Nori's POV. I think it's nicer if you guys make up your mind as to what he's thinking. If I were to put it into words, it would probably change your vision of the story. But I might do Ori's or Dori's. Still, this probably won't happen until I've finished this story or am fairly advanced in the chapters.**

**A small note about the previous chapter (thanks to Clumsy0132 for reminding me) I wanted to ask: do you wish for me to put the translation of the few Khuzdul words used in the story / at the end in the A.N / not at all ? I posted on my profile the 2 websites I use for Khuzdul references. For those who wonders about the meaning of 'Mizimul' Nori will tell Amelia but later...real later... I'm not even sure when exactly as of yet. **

**About this chapter, well, first I hope you liked it. I know it's slightly shorter than the previous ones..but honestly I'm giving up trying to keep the length consistent. I can just promise it will never be under 6000 words. **

**The Ri brothers will return soon... don't worry :)**

**Thanks for reading! Thanks for your support!**

**Next update either Sunday or Monday :)**


	21. The Great Escape, Dwarf Edition

**Everything belongs to JRRTolkien**

**Warning: I put the warnings for the whole story on my profile, but just in case...violence ahead**

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><p>That night we camped in the woods, well we didn't really camp, we sat close together to keep warm because we didn't dare to light a fire. Thankfully we still had our warms coats, scarves and hoods. We had managed to find some bushes which grew around a tree trunk and had crawled under the bushes to find some hidden space between them and the actual trunk. There wasn't much room and we barely managed to both get in but we didn't care, at least if felt safe…or relatively so.<p>

We had walked a large circle around town, staying deep under the forest cover at all times. Now we found ourselves at its south west, Kili had said before explaining to my confused mind that we had arrived from the north that morning and ran away towards the east after jumping out the window.

Even though I was upset and scared at the whole situation we were in, I managed to sleep a bit. Kili held me against his chest the whole night and I felt reassured by his presence. I was quite certain me being here was good for his morale too. It did bring to my mind another warm chest though, but there was no time to ponder on such thoughts.

We had spent the whole day arguing about the "Plan". I had been adamant, we needed to know what was happening in there and there was no way I'd spent two or three days running back to Thorin's Halls; in such a long period of time, those people could do anything to Bofur and Fili.

Kili had finally agreed but had let me known in no uncertain terms that he didn't like my idea, at all. Well, seeing as we had no other, we didn't have much choice but to try and hope that the villagers would feel that they owed me.

The morning came and we crawled out of our hiding place, both feeling tired and tensed.

We silently made our way to the town and stayed hidden near the forest's edge, observing the town from afar. After a few silent hours I had spent clutching at the beads in my braid though, my patience ran thin and I stood, removing slowly my coat, scarf, hood, gloves and mittens. Kili looked at me perplexed but took the items as I handed them to him each at a time.

I then grabbed a leather thread and used it to keep my hair in a low ponytail that dissimulated my braid. Once I was certain it was properly hidden, I took some mud, dirt and twigs and rubbed them on my skin and in my hair too. I rubbed some dirt on my clothes too. All this time Kili stared at me with a befuddled look.

"Alright, what are you doing? Have you lost your mind?" Kili asked perplexed.

"Nope." I answered. "But those people pitied me when I was fine and healthy, I'm just hoping that me looking tired, dirty and hurt would help them remember that."

I stood back up eyeing my clothes sceptically before nodding to myself. I was dirty enough and looked rather pathetic and helpless, which was what I'd aimed for. Then I bent to take the dagger that had been hidden in my boot this whole time.

I unsheathed it, startling Kili who had simply stared at me with wide eyes.

"Wow, what are you planning now?!" he grabbed my wrist, holding the dagger as far from me as possible.

"Kili…" I sighed. "If I'm hurt and helpless surely they're bound to underestimate me right?"

I eyed him before handing him the dagger.

"You better do it before I poke my eye out."

"What?! No! I didn't agree with this!" He almost shouted, barely resisting the urge to jump away from me.

It took some shushed arguing before Kili finally took the dagger and pulled on a face, muttering.

"I'm going to get skinned. Not killed, but skinned."

I rolled my eyes at his antics before slapping his shoulder.

"Come on, be quick." I muttered darkly.

I expected it to sting or hurt but as I closed my eyes and waited for the blade to sink in my skin, nothing happened. I opened one eye gingerly and saw Kili's stubborn and annoyed face.

"I really don't think it's necessary…" Kili persisted.

"I don't like it anymore than you do!" I hissed.

"Then really let's stop it here. I already feel terrible for agreeing with this plan."

We glared at each other. I didn't enjoy the fact that he was about to cut my face, but it just wouldn't do if I came in that town looking alright and perfectly fine. I was about to give him a piece of my mind when he said.

"I really think you look harmless, useless and helpless enough. You're a human but you're so small and without your warm coat and hood it's easy to see you're not muscled. I'm pretty sure that if you go in there they'd think nothing of it."

I glared slightly at him, I didn't particularly appreciate being considered so hopeless by my own friend, but he was unfortunately right. I looked at him and the dagger in his hand; maybe he was right. After all I really didn't relish being cut to pieces so I finally relented. Honestly it really wasn't that hard for him to convince me.

"Fine. We'll do it that way then."

He mechanically swiped the dagger's blade, showing his care for such details and gave it back to me, helping me make sure it was invisible under my boot and breeches. I had asked him whether he thought they would try and search me for weapons but he had shrugged helplessly. We had no idea as to how the people would react to my presence. If we were lucky, the simple fact that I was a woman would divert their suspicions but in all truth the peasants could be nice with me or just as well kill me.

I was ready to lie about how they had been right the last time and how I had no choice but to obey the mean dwarves…a stupid lie really, but that would play right into their beliefs and prejudices about dwarves and if it could save all our lives, I didn't mind having to act a bit.

Everything seemed ready for me to go and I stood motionless, facing Kili. There was a sudden pause, we both looked like we wanted to say something yet couldn't or didn't actually know what to say. I could easily see Kili's struggle about this risky plan and I was reminded once more of the dwarves' natural protectiveness. We didn't have much choice though; we needed to try and find our friends, and if possible free them too. Looking at each other I ended up forcing a reassuring smile on my face before clearing my throat.

"So…"

"So..."

"Well, I guess I should go then…"

I hadn't taken three steps that Kili was grabbing my arm, stopping me before engulfing me in a tight embrace. I encircled his waist with my arms and closed my eyes, taking a shaky breath. We stayed like this for a few minutes before I pulled back. Neither of us wanted to let go though, that much was clear.

"Please, be careful." He whispered, grimacing.

"I will."

"You remember the signs I taught you?"

I nodded before repeating each hand sign in front of him. That he had taken the liberty to teach me some Iglishmêk was a clear sign of what a dire situation we were stuck in. We had both agreed to deal with the consequences of me learning a few words later; surely, we had thought, my status of ward would make my pitiful knowledge bearable for the other dwarves. Still, I had agreed not to reveal anything before Kili did.

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><p>Ten minutes later I was staggering and limping toward the closest house. I did hope my acting skills would be enough for these men. Logically they should be as they had already worked once. Now if only they could be either friendly with me or stupid enough to believe some more lies. When I noticed that a few people nearby had spotted me, I tried my best to look exhausted, frightened, and helpless.<p>

That wasn't too complicated all things considered…

When a child pointed his finger at me I braced myself and made it look like I had stumbled before I let myself fall in a heap on the muddy ground. I stayed there and closed my eyes when I heard rushed steps getting towards me.

A hand brushed my cut cheek and I blinked, fluttering my eyes open just slightly.

I didn't even try to speak as I looked at the woman whom I had met several times during my previous visit here.

"Oh, missy…" She whispered brokenly. "You shouldn't have come back."

Maybe it was the look in her eyes, maybe it was her voice, I wasn't too sure about what hinted it, but something in my gut told me that something was indeed very wrong in that town. I heard other voices and knew that people were coming our way. I had to try and talk to her right now, especially now that I had seen her reaction. She seemed genuinely afraid and concerned for me. She seemed broken. I had a split second to decide whether to trust my instinct or try to stick to the plan and tell her the lie about me escaping from the dwarves' evil clutches.

It was nothing but a bet. A risky, potentially deadly bet…and I decided to gamble.

"My friends…" I murmured hurriedly. "Are they alive?"

The woman barely had the time to whisper a 'yes' when I felt two hands fall heavily on my shoulders before I was yanked brutally to my feet. I didn't even try to stop a yelp to pass my lips. This man was a brute.

"Who are you?" He growled at me, turning me forcefully so we were face to face.

For a second I didn't know what to say. I felt fear grip at my heart, mixing with the short lived relief I had felt at hearing my friends were alive.

"I…er…" I stammered helplessly.

"She comes from a small settlement further away in the valley."

I had trouble hiding my surprise when I heard the woman, whose name I still didn't know I realized, trying to protect me.

The man who held me was tall and broad shouldered. His hair was cut very short and he had stubble on his cheeks, though it only gave him a dirty, disgusting appearance. His fingers dug painfully in my shoulders and I saw him eye the woman suspiciously.

"My…" I stuttered to bring his attention back on me. "My family was attacked. I ran away."

He narrowed his eyes at me and then barked at the woman to go back to her children, though he used the term whelps. What a charming personality this idiotic brute seemed to have.

He then violently pushed me towards the town's centre and only then did I realize that a second man had been there, though completely silent, all along. Each of them took me by one shoulder and forced me to follow them.

Thinking quickly I decided to take yet another bet. The men were not looking at me, mumbling between themselves about things I didn't care about, for nothing concerned me or my friends. Slowly I inched my right hand behind the man's back, hiding it from both their views.

Quickly I signed two of the several words Kili had taught me.

_Alright._

_Safe._

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><p>A few hours later I was sitting in the town's master house, looking straight into the creepy man's face, who still hadn't put two and two together and didn't recognize me. Yet I couldn't find it in myself to rejoice; this man scared me more than anyone else. His cold demeanour, his ugly face and his eyes that leered at me made my skin crawl.<p>

Since my arrival I had been forced to face that awfully creepy man who had spent all the time asking me questions after questions. I couldn't understand what was happening. It felt as if he was the master here, not a simple mercenary hired by the town's folk.

Had Kili and I been mistaken? Was something else going on? And why had the woman been so scared? Why did she help me if these men had been hired? Was it due to her beliefs about dwarves enslaving people?

I was forced to focus back on the horrible man when he slammed his hand on the wooden table loudly.

"So, missy, where do you come from? What happened to you?" he repeated once more, narrowing his eyes at me and I had to force myself not to sigh.

How many times would he ask me the same questions? This man wasn't only creepy, he was stubborn and annoying to a point where dwarves appeared like little friendly angels.

"I lived with my family in a small settlement near the mountains. We didn't name it, it was so small, just a few families. And a week ago we were attacked. My family, they made me run and hide as soon as they saw the weird men coming. I'm alone now, all alone." As I spoke, I thought about all the terrible things that could happen or might already have happened. That did the trick and my voice broke as I lied.

I hid my faces behind my hands and held my breath as this man pondered once more on what I had said. I had been careful not to always repeat the exact same words, forcing myself to stammer, blabber and ramble. I had told this tale with small variations and hesitations numerous times already, trying not to sound as if I had rehearsed it, but he still didn't believe me.

Well I couldn't hold it against him; it wasn't exactly the truth, though it wasn't entirely lies either.

"I don't trust you."

Well, now was the right time to prove I could honestly deserve some acting reward.

I forced myself to look at him and let my lower lip tremble. I stared at him with the best puppy eyes I could make. I looked into his eyes and squeaked in a shaky voice.

"Please mister…I can work until my family comes back. They can't all have died. Can they?"

At this question I looked at the men around, trying to sound as much like a little lost girl as possible. A few of them shifted awkwardly on their feet, some looked at me with pity. But most of them stared at me blankly, clearly uncaring.

I lowered my head, looking around slightly from under my eyelashes. The room was small and crowded by these weird people. The little furniture there was, was made of wood and clearly not new. I was mostly surprised to see so much food displayed on the counters and table though. It hadn't looked like the first woman had anything in her cellar as she seemed painfully thin, yet here I could see apples, cheese, bread, meat even.

Then I saw in a corner a weird weapon that made me shiver. It looked lethal. Horrifyingly so. It was in my mind a very good example of medieval weaponry, what with all the metal that spiked the end of this weird looking metallic club. I shivered and forced my gaze away, I really didn't want to think about what that thing would do to me.

The creepy man, called Abbot I had found out, stood up and ordered for me to be put in one of the rooms upstairs.

I didn't try to resist, instead choosing to hide my face behind my hands and faking a dry sob.

The men harshly hosted me to my feet and guided me upstairs toward a door at the end of a dark corridor and pushed me brutally in a small, cold bedroom. I heard the door click shut behind me and their steps leading them away. I waited for a few minutes, still faking sobs in case they had good ears or someone was still behind the door.

I glanced around. There was just a small wooden bed that looked too old to hold my weight, a wooden table and a chair. That was it. On the bed there wasn't any pillow and just a yellowy sheet.

Then I went to the window and tried to find out whether Kili was around there somewhere. I couldn't see anything though, and I wondered what I had expected. Seeing that no men were in sight I stayed in front of the window and repeated few words in Iglishmêk.

_'Alright. Safe. Alright. Safe.'_

I could only hope that Kili, wherever he was right now, was able to see me. After awhile I stopped and looked sceptically at the window. Surely these men wouldn't be so dumb? But then, they still seemed to believe I was some sort of weak and helpless girl, which actually wasn't far from the truth, even though that Abbot clearly suspected me of one thing or another. Still I gingerly placed my hands on the windowsill and tried to slowly push, pull and basically tried any movement I could think of to open the window. Finally I managed to open it, but only enough for me to pass a hand under the glass, in the opening. The mechanism was rusted and I just wasn't strong enough to push it further upwards.

I sighed and turned away, listening for sounds around. I was about to go and try opening the door when I heard a low whoosh, followed by a dull thud.

I blinked and looked around. It took me awhile to find the dark arrow stuck in one of the bed-posts. I quickly grabbed it and smiled. This was one of Kili's arrows, I was certain of it. This dwarf truly was amazingly skilled. I went back to the window and showed the arrow. I couldn't see Kili, but we both knew the other was alright. Right now that was the only thing that mattered.

_'Wait. Look around. Alright.'_

I said in Iglishmêk and didn't wait for him to send an arrow, assuming he had seen me. I went toward the door and stuck my ear against it. No one seemed to be around. I glanced through the window, night was falling quickly, but I should probably wait for the wee hours of the morning to act.

* * *

><p>I couldn't tell what time it was, but probably around midnight, when I decided trying to open the door. I was getting impatient and waiting suddenly seemed ridiculous. I had heard some noise awhile ago and since then it had been completely silent in the house. Either everyone was asleep or they were not used to make any noise.<p>

I tried to turn the doorknob and was shocked when I realized it wasn't actually locked. It made me blink and wonder at these men's stupidity and sexism. They clearly didn't even think I'd try and leave my room or my acting skills were really good and I had really looked like a helpless and scared peasant girl. I wondered then whether they really were all stupid; Abbot had seemed so suspicious of me earlier, then again, it only took me a glance to realize that there was simply no locker at the door. Still I wouldn't complain, I didn't know how to pick a lock and it would have been rather stupid to end up being held prisoner here. I slowly opened the wooden door.

Craning my head in the small opening, I took a glimpse around.

The corridor was dark and absolutely bare of any kind of decoration. There were five doors in total, including the one I was in. A small window at the end of it allowed some moonlight to filter in.

I inhaled slowly before stepping in the corridor. I could feel Nori's blade still hidden in my boot and that calmed me down, but I took Kili's arrow with me, though I had no idea what I could use it for. Maybe open a door? Stab someone in the eye with it? Yep, that should work perfectly.

Now, I knew Bofur and Fili had probably been put in the cellar, but should I not look around in case they were detained in another room? I hesitated for all but a minute, deciding it wouldn't cost me to have a quick look around. Well, as quickly as I could.

My heart was beating loudly against my ribcage and I was concentrating on my breathing, keeping it controlled and noiseless. Images of horror movies flashed through my mind and I had to shake my head, chastising myself mentally for being so silly. Now wasn't the time to panic or anything. Unexpectedly it did feel slightly thrilling to sneak around at night. But I couldn't find any enjoyment in it; I could only be grateful for the adrenaline that rushed in my veins, keeping me focused and prudent.

It felt like I had been walking in the darkness for ages before I finally stopped, facing the door next to mine in the corridor. I swallowed and gently turned the knob, hoping it wouldn't creak, and then pushed softly. The door opened soundlessly to a small dark room. Thankfully though, a tiny window let starlight leak inside, providing me with at least a little helpful light. Apparently none of the windows around had shutters, well I wouldn't complain about what little help I could find.

I peered around but couldn't see anything particular. This looked like a study of some sort and there were absolutely no dwarves in sight, just stored trunks that I had no time to open. I shut the door back close and quickly went to the third, only to be disappointed once more; this time it was a bathroom.

My heart almost stopped after I opened the fourth a little bit carelessly; after two useless rooms, I had let myself become less attentive and cautious. I opened the door quickly, thinking there wouldn't be anything inside, only to have my eyes widened in shock. Fear coursed through me and I held my breath. There wasn't anything in this room except for three beds currently occupied by snoring men. It took me several seconds to calm my nerves enough to close the door noiselessly and I had to wait for a few minutes to let my heart rate lower slightly.

I was obviously extremely prudent when I opened the last room which was once more occupied by sleeping men, two of them. I swallowed and quickly left that side of the corridor, silently going back to the top of the stairs.

I inhaled and tried to gather my courage before deciding whether I should risk going down and come face to face with one of the other men or not. Well, I hadn't really come here to spend my time waiting for something to happen. I had to try my best and find my friends and I couldn't think of another place where they'd be held prisoners other than in this house. They had to be in the cellar, there was no other place…

I thought back about the woman's words. She had said they were alive, but I wondered whether I really should trust her or not. As doubt menaced to weaken my hopes, I shook my head. I had to simply be logical about it all; I hadn't seen any corpse, surely that was a good sign, and now that I thought about it, there hadn't been pools of blood on the stairs outside the house. Considering this era's weapons, had they been killed during the fight, then they should have bled profusely. No pool of blood meant they were alive.

Yes, my friends were alive. There was no questioning it.

Bracing myself and clearly heartened by my deductions, I walked slowly downstairs, cringing each time a step would make the slightest noise. I felt I could breathe better when I finally put my feet on the stone floor. Now, where to go? Should I go directly to the cellar? Should I look around?

I knew the kitchen, where the interrogation had taken place, was on my right and the living room was behind me at the end of the corridor. I was facing the entrance door and the corridor I had followed the previous day with Kili was longing the stairs, going to the living room where the sick people had been put when I had healed them. The door to the cellar was the one just next to the living room.

I looked at my left to see that said corridor was leading to just one other door only.

Walking to this other door, I turned the knob and pushed slightly enough to peek inside. This was yet another bedroom, but it looked unoccupied. I was about to open the door completely and enter when a soft snore made me freeze. Looking in the direction of the bed I could barely distinguish a form under the mountain of covers and furs.

It was too big to be a dwarf and my best guess was that it was the creepy man. Next to the bed, shining slightly in the moonlight that leaked from the window was the spiked weapon.

I gulped and took a minute to find the courage to actually move.

In the end it took me several minutes to close the door for I was panicking at the idea of waking that man in particular. He really scared me more than all the others put together. Once the door was shut I took a few steps away from it and placed one hand on my chest, above my heart. It was thumping hard and I suddenly wondered whether the noise of its beat could be heard. It certainly sounded loud enough in my ears.

After a short while I braced myself and walked to the cellar door, paying extra attention to the noise now that I knew for certain someone was sleeping down here.

The door opened on the dark stone steps going down, leading to the cellar and occasional cell of this house. I hesitated slightly. I didn't really feel like going downstairs without a light, knowing my luck, I'd only be able to fall and break a leg or worse, my neck. I cursed my inability to light a candle and bit my lip.

My rational brain whispered that there would be no use in going there without a light or anything even though my conscious told me my two friends could very well be down there. It was the only room left and Fili and Bofur just had to be there. I tried to concentrate and listened intently for any noise the two dwarves were likely to make. I didn't dare whisper though for fear to wake the men, or worse, someone else from their group, who could be down those stairs.

I finally decided against doing anything without a light and was slowly going back, trying to go to the kitchen to see if there were embers in the oven there, when I heard a soft thud coming from the living room. My blood seemed to freeze in my veins and I didn't know what I should do. I was in the middle of the corridor. There was nowhere to hide, unless I tried and went down the dark stairs and I couldn't run towards it, for it'd make too much noise.

I was holding my breath, stuck on the spot, observing with terrified eyes as the door of the living room slowly opened. From the soft moon light that leaked into the corridor, I saw a short shape slowly make its way in the corridor.

He wouldn't have dared?!

I cursed the stupid dwarf that had absolutely no patience and sighed. I must have been loud enough for him to hear me because I saw him startle and unsheathe his sword.

"Oh stop that." I hissed in as low a whisper as I could.

I knew dwarves' ears were good but I was still surprised to see him instantly relax. He beckoned me to show him the way to the room upstairs and I glared at him. I had no way to let him know there were people around unless I talked, and I didn't dare do so in the empty corridors. I put a finger on my lips, hoping he'd understand the gesture and slowly made my way towards him. When I was close enough I saw he was frowning, gesturing for me to go upstairs while I shook my head. There were just too many men sleeping up there.

Besides, with Kili here, we could light a candle and go in the cellar. There was no point in going back to the small room and then down once more. The young dwarf relented and followed me, closing silently the door. We both walked to the furthest wall and crouched in the shadows.

I didn't give him time to say anything as I hissed, still keeping my voice down.

"Are you crazy? If they find you here can you imagine what they'd do? There're six of them in this house, five upstairs, one downstairs. I don't know where the others are."

"There are three of them in the streets, one at the entrance door of this house. They're guarding the place." He said but he didn't have the time to continue as I interrupted him.

"I just have to check the cellar; it's the last room I can think of." I felt nervous about it all, what if they weren't there?

"I think I know where they keep them. It's not in here. I needed to come and tell you." He whispered back, unperturbed by my rant.

"What? Really? Where?" At that news, I simply forgot completely about the risk Kili had taken.

"I saw some men going into a small shed in the north-west part of the woods." He breathed out, stepping closer to me so that we could keep our voices as low as possible.

"What? When?"

"After you got here; I saw you talk with that woman first, then be taken here. I couldn't see the house properly from where I was so I had to skirt around once more. Later, just after you told me you were alright, five of them went into the woods and I found it weird they'd go at that time when night was close to fall." He explained. "I followed them from afar for maybe one and a half mile, no more than two, to a shed. Probably used by hunters, anyway there's no window in it so I don't know what's inside."

"Well, that'd be too easy otherwise, wouldn't it?" I muttered really annoyed by our lack of luck.

"The men went inside and stayed for some time, maybe one hour. Then five of them went back to town but, three of the five were different men than before."

"They're guarding them." I breathed out as I suddenly felt rather depressed and Kili nodded.

"That's what I thought. What do you think we should do? Maybe with a good diversion we could outdo them?" He started to plan.

"Well, you think we could do it tonight?" I was anxious to find our friends.

"Maybe…we could wait for the late hours, when dawn isn't here yet and the night is at its darkest. That's usually when people on watch are the most tired."

"If you say so…"

I really didn't feel like it was such a good plan. It wasn't even a plan per se and sounded more like "let's go in and kick some ass". Not much strategically speaking. But well, the one we had so far wasn't much better anyway. Still, the fact we couldn't see what was happening inside bothered me. We couldn't be certain of anything. For all we knew there were ten of them inside that shed playing cards all night long and drinking while our friends where just down here in the cellar.

Then on the other hand if there was even the remote chance we'd prevail in this fight, then maybe we should do it. My gaze fell on Kili's arrow that I was still clutching tightly in my left hand as if it helped me. I grimaced turning it between my fingers while trying to find another option.

"If there's some light, you think you could kill, or at least incapacitate them with your bow?" I asked Kili with a frown.

For all I knew he had never killed anyone and might only have shot at rabbits.

"What are you thinking of exactly?"

I explained him the idea I had and after a few changes we agreed on giving it a try. We only had one shot though so we better be lucky this time. I really hoped they weren't guarding some useless things in that shed, otherwise we'll be in trouble and they might actually kill Fili and Bofur for revenge, especially if we killed their people for seemingly nothing.

We went back toward the broken window and I was about to jump outside when Kili stopped me and quickly went out of the room, in the corridor. I followed him to the door, bewildered and saw him enter the kitchen. He came back minutes later and opened his bag to let me see a loaf of bread, cheeses and apples that he had put hurriedly in it. He was about to go to the window when I stopped him with a hand on his shoulder. I leant toward him and whispered close to his ear.

"Shouldn't we at least check the cellar here? That's where the others had been imprisoned."

I saw him hesitate for a minute. He was apparently sure the men wouldn't go so far in the woods if it wasn't to guard prisoners and honestly, I agreed with him. But I just couldn't walk away of this house knowing there might be a chance, however slight, that our friends were down there in this blasted cellar.

I saw Kili give me a sharp nod and I pointed at candles on a table nearby the hearth. Kili made quick work of lighting one and gestured for me to stay in the living room. I saw him once more disappear in the corridor but this time, the light of the candle seemed like a dangerous beacon to me. My heart was pounding louder than ever as I waited for him to come back.

I prayed for our friends to be down there so that we could just run away without having to plan and fight.

But when Kili reappeared his face was grim, obviously he too had hoped Fili and Bofur would be down the dark stairs. Forlornly we both retraced our footsteps of the day before to the window and Kili gestured for me to jump first.

Once outside I shivered from the cold but running to the forest warmed me up. Once we were under the cover of the trees' shadows, I took back my clothes and backpack Kili had hid under a bush. We both remained silent and Kili waited patiently for me to be ready before leading me in that shed's direction.

* * *

><p>One hour later we were observing the little shed from afar. It was made of wood and looked like it was about to fall to the floor. As Kili had said, there wasn't any window but light was seeping through a small space between the floor and the bottom of the door. At least we were certain that some people were inside and were likely awake.<p>

"Well, I guess we won't need the torch." I whispered.

"Unless they blow the lights out when you arrive." Kili frowned.

"Surely if we surprise them, they wouldn't have the time to react that way." I groaned, though he was right.

And because we couldn't guess how they would react, I started preparing a torch with dry branches I found close by for we had nothing better to use. Kili would light it at the last moment for me.

"So, you say there're three of them inside?" I asked for the umpteenth times.

"Well, there might be more." He repeated once more and it still didn't please me to hear it.

"Great. Something worries me though." He cocked an eyebrow at me, as if saying 'only one thing?' but I ignored him and continued. "Let's say one of them opens the door and you manage to shoot him." He nodded at that. "How can we be sure the other two's reaction won't be to immediately kill Fili and Bofur?"

His face fell at that. We really hadn't thought this through and I didn't trust my lucky star. Not tonight. Not after the events of the previous day. The both of us stared at each other and I felt as if we'd end up hugging soon. It was clear we had no idea of what we were doing; we were just improvising and had no valuable information. We were basically gambling and we knew it, the worst part of it all being that this time, the reward wouldn't be silver or money, but the lives of our friends, of Kili's brother.

Suddenly the life or death situation seemed much more real than it had been that morning when I had entered the town. Back then I had thought that in the worst case scenario I would be able to lie convincingly enough to find my way out of a bad situation and Kili was still free in any case. Now though…there was no safety net, no plan B. We would simply try and enter that shed, hoping that only three of them would be in and that they would all die quickly and quietly. There was no certainty.

"They might be mercenaries, but they're no real warriors." He tried to convince himself and we both knew it. "Besides they're not expecting us, they wouldn't have prepared any plan."

Neither of us could ignore it; we were trying to reassure ourselves more than anything else. Still, Kili made sense, and there was no point in dwelling on what could or couldn't happen. We needed to act, not worry ourselves over unknown facts.

"You might have to use your dagger though." Kili said while visibly wincing.

I gulped at that and gingerly took the blade, holding it in my right hand. I really didn't think I'd ever be able to use it in such a way. I thought about Fili and Bofur, imagined what those men might have done to them, might do to them if we were to fail in our rescue attempt.

My grasp tightened around the hilt without me realizing it. I looked back at Kili and nodded, though I perfectly knew I might at best distract the men in there with the blade, nothing more. I purposely occulted thoughts of what would happen if I found myself facing one of these men's swords. I had no illusions, with or without Nori's dagger I wouldn't survive a confrontation with one of these mercenaries, unless he only wanted to capture me, which wasn't exactly a better solution as far as I was concerned.

"Maybe you should come closer too, if you're ready to fire anyway, they won't have time to see you and then you'll be here quickly enough to help me. I'll be able to play for time but not much else I'm afraid."

We looked at each other and I stood up, clearly uncertain and worried. For a short moment I struggled to stop the trembling in my knees. I tried to square my shoulders and attempted to give myself a mental pep talk but to be honest, I wasn't very good at it.

We both walked in the direction of the shed's door, Kili had an arrow already notched and was ready to draw his bow in case one of them went out unexpectedly. When we were around ten meters away from the door we stopped and Kili bent down, eyeing the door suspiciously before letting his bow and arrow on the ground.

He made quick work of lighting the torch and gave it to me.

"Remember to stay on the side so that I can have proper shots."

I nodded and gulped. My palms were sweaty and my heart pounded in my chest. I braced myself and briskly walked to the door. My left hand was holding the torch and the dagger was in my right one. At that moment, I realized I was actually planning the death of people I knew nothing about. Wasn't that worse than anything else I might have done before? Wasn't it far worse than poisoning the villagers? What was I doing? I shook my head, wishing those ideas away from my mind. They were mercenaries; they had attacked us first and had abducted my friends. What we were planning was legitimate, defensive action. They were not innocent. They were criminals. We had no other choices.

I had to concentrate on my task, not its consequences. Not now.

Now I needed to focus.

I took a deep breath and decided now was as good a time as it will ever be to start our rescue operation. I knocked loudly at the door with my right hand, hitting the hilt of the dagger against the wooden surface and started to shout.

"Help, please. Please, open the door."

I heard shuffling and curses inside before heavy steps came in my direction. I took a few steps back, standing slightly to the side of the door.

"Please, is there anyone here? Please open the door!"

I never would have thought my voice could become so … girly. I sounded like a stupid victim in any crappy scary movie. I quickly pushed away thoughts of blood baths and psychopaths who were living in forest sheds. I really didn't need to scare myself more than I already was.

The door opened on a tall, lanky man and I quickly hid the dagger I held by turning slightly so that he wouldn't see my hand as it lay on my side.

"Who are you?" The man narrowed his eyes at me.

He was rather tall and large. He towered over me in an oppressive way. A terrifying image of him killing me rather gruesomely crossed my mind and I shivered.

"I was in the house when strange looking men came in. I escaped but they're everywhere in town. I ran here and saw this house from afar. Please you have to come and help." I squeaked in a small voice.

"What? What did they look like?" A second man came behind the first.

This one was leaner and taller than the first. His long hair didn't dissimulate an ugly scar on the side of his face and I gulped when I realized he had no more right ear. These men were accustomed to violence, that much was clear.

"Well, they were rather gruff looking and short…"

I took a step back, trying to tempt the men to step out of the shed. Kili could shot them I was sure, but right now the third still hadn't made any appearance and it worried me. Apparently Kili was thinking along the same line.

"It could be the…" started the second one, finally stepping out, slightly forcing his friend to do so too.

"Hey, who's this?" The first one interrupted him and stepping further out of the way.

The first man's hand went to his side, probably to grab the sword hanging there, looking in Kili's direction. Then everything went very fast.

Before he could even touch the hilt of his sword I heard one whooshing sound, quickly followed by a second one and then screams echoed in the night. But I didn't wait to look at the body falling on the floor. Letting the torch fall in the grass I sprinted inside the house, jumping above the large man already lying there and shouldering the second leaner one as he staggered to the floor, an arrow protruding from his chest. I felt a hand trying to grab my ankle but a swift backward kick, which was then followed by a grunt, allowed me to enter freely.

With a quick glance around I analyzed the situation surprisingly quickly.

Adrenaline rushed in my veins, allowing me to be astonishingly quick and reactive. As soon as I entered the shed, I saw the third man and jumped in his direction without missing a beat. He was already running toward a door at the back, his sword in his hand.

I ran behind him.

He pushed the door violently open and ran quickly to the back of the room. I was already close behind him when I saw him raise his sword above his head. I stared at this man's back.

I could make out two forms lying on the floor in front of him but my eyes were glued to the mercenary.

I knew what he was about to do and I saw red. A rage I had never felt before overpowered me.

Blood rushed in my ears.

I didn't analyze the situation. I had no time. I didn't hear Kili's shout from behind me. I didn't see Fili's wide eyes. I didn't see Bofur trying to move in front of the blond dwarf.

My mind went blank.

Just blank.

And then instinct took complete control over my body.

In a split second I was raising my hand far above my head, still running toward the man, not even realizing I was screaming hatefully. The seconds were ticking painstakingly slowly, but I was still running out of time.

As the man's sword was starting its deadly course towards the bodies on the ground I jumped, knocking and destabilizing him, while I brought my hand down quickly and with all the strength I could gather, using the momentum of our fall to my advantage.

I felt the short resistance as the blade pierced leather and clothes, skin and bones.

It didn't deter me at the time. I was completely lost in an entirely new feeling of blood rage. I raised my hand once more, yanking the blade free with a disgusting noise I didn't hear and then I brought it down again.

And again. And again. And again…

I felt a warm liquid splatter on me but I didn't care. I wasn't conscious of the fact that I was straddling the man's back, hitting him repeatedly as he lay motionless on the floor. Hate and rage were the only things I felt.

Only one thought swirled in my clouded mind. Protect Fili and Bofur at all costs.

It was Kili's hands on my forearms that finally brought me out of my trance and he forced me to stand and step back, pushing me to the opposite wall and forcing me to sit down.

He took the dagger, struggling against my strong grip before letting the blade clatter on the wooden floor.

My mind was completely clouded and I looked at the events happening around me without really registering anything.

Kili went to the two forms still lying on the floor and quickly freed them. Then I saw Fili and Kili leave this room to do who knows what in the other part of the shed while Bofur came to my side but my brain truly couldn't register anything at the moment. I saw the dead man, I heard the blood still rushing in my ears and my heart beating at an incredible pace.

I smelt the coppery smell of blood. I could even taste it.

My eyes widened as I drew in a quick breath.

What?

What had I...?

"Amelia. Amelia, look at me. Look at me lass." Bofur repeated until his voice finally broke into my torpor.

I struggled to focus on him and his words. His hands were rubbing my arms forcing some warmth in them and making me realize how bloody cold I suddenly felt. My gaze was glued to the form that lay still a few meters away, a pool of red blood already expending around it. There was blood on the wall. My eyes widened and I tried to look anywhere but in front of me. As I looked up I saw the trails of blood drops on the ceiling too.

A dry sob escaped my mouth and I started to shake violently.

Bofur quickly brought his arms around me and held me against his chest while I broke into heavy sobs. I didn't hear Kili and Fili come back but I knew they were around. I could hear their shushed whispers.

"Lass, I know it's hard but we need you to brace yourself for now." Bofur voice softly whispered in my ear and somehow, I heard him clearly.

"I…I…I'm sorry…" I stammered.

"It's fine, it's perfectly normal. But you can't think about that right now, we have to run away quickly. Can you stand?"

I nodded and Bofur helped me up. As soon as I was on my two feet I was engulfed in a tight hug. Blinking into the blond hair I hugged Fili's back, before he released his grip on me and Kili took me in his arms too.

It took several more minutes for my brain to start to work again, and in order to do so I had to force myself to push aside any thoughts other than those of my friends and running away. Denial truly was an impressive thing...I needed to focus now and I'll let myself crumble later, preferably somewhere where we didn't risk being killed on the spot if we were seen.

"We need to leave now. They will chase us as soon as they find out about our escape." Bofur said.

"If we're lucky, they won't find out before morning. We're too far from town for them to have heard any noise." Kili said.

"It will give us some time to put as much distance between us and them then." Fili muttered.

"Mine and Meli's bags are not far from here. Did they bring yours in this shed?"

"No. They took our weapons too." Fili angrily grunted.

"We can't retrieve them right now. Better run away and come back another time." Bofur seemed as angry and upset as Fili about it. "We should not waste anymore time. Let's go."

"Wait." Fili said stopping Bofur. "Why don't we take their weapons? It's better than nothing."

Bofur nodded and did whatever they needed to do while I went outside, purposely avoided to look at two large dark pools next to the door and the two dead bodies that had been dragged inside. I went to retrieve my bag and Kili's. My whole body seemed to be on autopilot, my brain was completely disconnected from reality and I was thankful for this small reprieve. When I came back with the bags, the three of them were waiting for me.

As soon as Kili took his backpack we started to walk toward the forest and suddenly an idea occurred to me.

"You said that they'll try to chase us, right?" At their nods I asked. "In what directions are we going right now?"

"North, towards the mountains."

Fili answered with a shrug as if it were the obvious choice; the problem was…it was the obvious choice.

"It's too predictable. They'll go looking for us in that direction. They won't even try to track us. They'll just run in the direction of the mountain, of our home. We have to go somewhere else."

They clearly seemed to ponder on this and Bofur finally nodded, agreeing with me it would be less risky for us to make a detour. After all there were only four of us and I really didn't count if we had to fight. Besides both Bofur and Fili were forced to use others weapons and I could feel they didn't like it one bit.

After some hushed discussion we, or rather they, decided to go westward, toward the south's edge of the mountains.

We walked all night long and didn't stop until the sun was high in the sky. By the time we found a place remote enough for us to hide I was exhausted. My feet hurt, my back hurt, but I was entirely too tired to complain. And too scared too. I kept looking behind my shoulder, expecting hordes of men to fall on us.

As Bofur said we should take a short break, I let myself fall on the nearest small boulder and closed my eyes for a moment. I opened them when Kili took out of his bag four of the apples he had stolen. After he distributed them, we ate in silence.

I focused all my thoughts on eating the juicy fruit, knowing it wasn't still the time for me to think about that night's events. Swallowing seemed like a feat at the moment and I coughed as an apple piece got stuck in my throat. I avoided looking at the three dwarves. I could feel them observing me, obviously waiting for the moment I'll break down.

Well, they could wait because I was rather set on keeping myself together until I was in some place safe. Preferably a place where I knew I'd find three pairs of arms ready to embrace me and hold me together. Tears burnt my eyes but I somehow managed to swallow them back.

My thoughts then shifted to Dori, Nori and Ori and how I wished they were here. Then I tried to imagine what they would say when they would find out what happened and I almost winced. It wouldn't be pretty… I took a long shaky breath and swallowed back tears once again. After having closed my eyes for a second I opened them to have a look at my three, unnaturally silent companions.

As I had thought, they had been observing me but they avoided my gaze, uneasy, when I looked back at them. I frowned at realizing that Fili had a dark mark on his left cheekbone. I stared at it intensely and I didn't pay attention to the worried glances the three dwarves exchanged as I was so focused on Fili.

Finally my brain had something to concentrate on. I stood up, frowning and went straight toward the blond dwarf, stopping just a step away and he looked at me, clearly puzzled by my actions.

"Strip"

Alright, I might have been a tad too straightforward and I definitely should have been a bit more precise about my intentions. I could only say that my mind was having trouble functioning normally at the moment.

Fili's face turned bright red and I heard something metallic clank against the rocks behind me.

"What?" Fili squeaked in a strangled voice.

"I need to examine you. Somehow I don't think this bruise is the only one you received, now obey your healer and strip."

I could see him breathe more easily and, had the situation been different, I might have snorted. Bofur apparently had no qualms in doing so and I told him without looking back at him.

"Laugh all you want, you're next."

From the strangled sound I heard I gathered he hadn't expected it. Kili's chuckle brought a small smirk to my lips. It felt both great and odd to smirk in such a moment. I didn't ponder on that feeling though, Fili was finally standing up.

I hissed when he finally relented and removed his light coat, tunic and shirt. His chest was black and blue. Anger and hate were the predominant feelings in my chest, forcing my heart to beat wildly.

I swore.

Those bastards had apparently thought it funny to beat the two dwarves. I knew even before seeing it that Bofur would be in a similar state. Fili had a few bruised and cracked ribs as well as a long cut on his arm, just below his right shoulder. I cursed myself for not seeing it before. Seriously how difficult could it be to spot a cut and dried blood on a coat? Well apparently it was too difficult for my clouded brain. I cursed myself; a healer should be able to keep his mind clear all the time. I felt like I had failed my friends.

I rummaged through my backpack, glad I had taken upon myself to bring an improvised first-aid kit, and took out several small jars and vials, as well as a few bandages. This time I had taken more things with me than I had for my first trip to Gorm. As I took some bandages out I looked at Fili. He was about to protest but the glare I sent his way placated him and he quickly shut his mouth.

"I'm the healer here, so sit down and stop acting all tough."

I cleaned his wound first, blood had dried and clotted on it and once I removed it, I put some ointment to prevent infection and quickly put a clean bandage around it. I took some time to rub another ointment on his chest. Fili was beetroot red and Kili was mocking him, though I didn't pay attention to it.

"Oy, brother, you alright there? Enjoying yourself much?" Kili guffawed.

"Why? You jealous? I can help you sport a few bruises if you are…" Fili snapped back, though there wasn't any anger in his tone, merely embarrassment.

I told him not to do too much effort for awhile and try to get some rest as soon as we'll be in a safe place. He nodded and while he put back his clothes, I turned toward Bofur. The older dwarf was already removing his own garments and I spotted his grimace when he raised his arms. I quickly stepped in to help him and didn't even need to examine him to guess he likely suffered from at least one cracked rib.

Now that I was paying attention to it, I could see his breath was slightly shallow and he was clearly in pain. I ordered Kili to put some water to boil, which only helped us realize we hadn't much left and we'd soon need to find a clear stream. This mission really couldn't get any worse at this point. Still, the lack of water didn't worry us, we'll soon be high enough in the mountains to be able to gather what clean snow we could find and melt it.

Bofur's chest and back were worse than Fili's if that was even possible, and he had three cracked ribs and so many bruises that I didn't even bother to count them. A nasty gash on his shoulder had stopped to bleed already but I removed all the dried blood and cleaned it properly before tending to it. My anger towards these men grew tenfold. I knew dwarves were strong and resilient. There was no doubt in my mind that it must have taken quite some strength and some furious energy to break their bones. My eyes turned cold and steely when Bofur put his hand on my shoulder, slightly patting it.

"T'is alright lass. Just a few bruises. Nothing I've never already have."

"It's not alright." I snapped. "They had no right to do that to you. Don't you think I know how much effort was required to inflict those bruises?"

"Ow, they had to put some efforts alright. But we gave as much as we received…and some of them were not looking that well. It was a nice little battle..." He started but I interrupted him.

"Bofur, don't patronize me and don't think I'm stupid. Those aren't battle inflicted injuries." I bristled at his blatant lies and he had the decency to look sheepish.

"You shouldn't worry about us lass. We're strong." He gently said, still smiling softly.

"I'm a healer! And your friend! Of course I worry for you!" I had trouble to speak past the lump in my throat.

"And you're a good healer and a great friend." Fili intervened with a soft tone. "I'm already feeling better."

I huffed, annoyed at their attitude towards me. They chose not to insist, probably understanding that it wasn't such an abnormal thing that I'd feel bad at seeing them like this. Looking at their wounds had even put a damper on Kili's mood.

No one made anymore comments when I cursed the men after seeing that Bofur sported some cuts on his forearms and knuckles too.

It hadn't come to my mind that they might let me groan and curse, complaining about dwarves and their silly pride, simply to let me concentrate on something else than our escape. I was apparently transparent for them and I didn't realize it. Still, if I had I would have thanked them, thanks to their attitudes my mind was as far as it was possible from the man I had killed.

Later that evening, we finally arrived in the higher parts of the mountains and decided to camp near a small stream that ran between two rocks before disappearing quickly back into the mountain side. There was barely an inch of snow on the ground, but it was enough to be horribly uncomfortable. The night was short and we had to keep watches.

All in all I barely got any sleep.

We were freezing. The men had stolen Bofur's and Fili's warm fur coats, leaving them only with their thin leather coats that really weren't adapted to the weather or the snow in the mountains. We huddled close together, trying to keep each other warm and using my and Kili's coats as blankets of sorts. Right now, there was no thought about what was proper and what was not; in such a situation, even Dori probably wouldn't have commented on the fact that I basically slept on Kili. No, propriety was far from our minds. We were more bothered that we couldn't even light a fire to warm ourselves; if we did we would take the risk of being spotted.

Bofur had explained, and it was simple logic really, that even the smallest fire on the mountain side at night would be a beacon for miles and miles around. During the day, at least, we could manage to light a smokeless fire which wouldn't pinpoint our position to our enemies. At night though, we didn't want to try our luck.

We woke up early the following morning, eating some bread and cheese but rationing ourselves for we didn't have much food and didn't really had the time to hunt.

We walked all day long, stopping only once for a short break.

It took us three more days of intense walking to find back the mountain path that would lead us straight to Thorin's Halls. I was past exhausted. The only good news was that until then we hadn't seen any sign of the men. I was relieved too because Bofur's and Fili's wounds were healing nicely.

In the afternoon during the third day, I felt a huge weight lift from my shoulder when I recognized the blue stone, marked with a dwarfish rune, which signalled the path to the Halls wasn't too far ahead of us. We'll just need to turn around a large rock and then take the left path at the fork and in about a day, maybe even earlier if we chose not to stop that night, we'll be in front of the massive doors.

We would soon be home and I'd be able to cry on Dori's, Nori's and Ori's shoulders.

I shook my head. Now wasn't yet the time to think about that. I bottled up my raging and conflicting feelings and walked with renewed energy when some noise drifted to us with the wind.

I looked at my three companions who had stopped, frozen in their spots. I silently sent them questioning glances. They didn't say a word but quickly grabbed my arms and I let them guide me toward the nearest boulder. I quickly understood they meant to hide from something. It was completely meaningless, I thought, the snow would give away our hiding spot. Still, we hid behind the large rock and Bofur whispered in my ear.

"Armed men are coming this way."

"You think they got ahead of us?" I whispered back.

"Possible."

"The snow…" I tried but stopped when Bofur nodded gravely.

Obviously they knew we were surely going to be discovered.

I gulped and closed my eyes.

I had just started to think we'll be safely home in a short time and now those hopes had been rudely crushed. Instinctively my hand found my braid and I pressed one of the beads tightly between my fingers, hoping to find some strength to face what was coming. This braid had become my lucky charm.

My three companions and I were utterly silent.

We waited, anxious to find out who would soon be coming from the path.

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><p><strong>AN: Thanks to all the readers! And a huge thanks to the reviewers/followers/ favourites. The support is welcomed :)**

**Thank you Mary for reviewing so often!**

**I'm sorry I'll keep it short ...it's 2AM here and I'm falling asleep on the keyboard...Still I promised a chapter and here it is :) and a huge one too! (Hope you enjoyed it Mary!^^)**

**I hope you liked this chapter. As you see, I'm rather cruel with Amee...Yep, her first kill ever isn't a goblin but a man. I hope I wasn't too graphic. **

**For the Khuzdul, I put the website i use on my profile and I'll put the translation there too...So if some of you don't want to know and want to wait for Nori to say it, they can.(i'll add the translation tomorrow)**

**Next update in 2 or 3 days (Wednesday or Thursday...)**

**Thanks again everyone for the support!**


	22. Home at last

**Everything belongs to JRR Tolkien.**

**Warning: Violence (no more than the previous chapter though)**

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><p>I was completely crushed between Bofur and Fili, while Kili was readying himself to fire an arrow towards the people coming. My three friends were looking positively deadly. We heard the rushed footsteps coming closer to us to the point where they walked on the other side of the boulder we were using to hide. I held my breath, waiting for the shout that was sure to come when they would see the steps in the snow.<p>

I could already envision the battle to come. This time I was certain there wouldn't be any prisoner taken, or if there was, I wasn't sure they would be in good health. My mind brought forth an image of the spiked club I had seen in the house and I felt myself start to tremble. Letting go of the bead I held until then, I pressed both my hands on my thighs, clenching my fists tightly.

Bofur placed a hand on my right one, squeezing it in what I guessed was supposed to be a reassuring way, forcing me to calm a bit. His other hand was holding the hilt of a man's sword tightly. Bofur usually fought with a hammer, I wasn't too sure how that differed from fighting with a sword, but I was pretty certain it didn't bode well for the fight to come.

I bit my lip as I felt Fili pressed a little more against me. Glancing at him I saw him force a small smile on his lips. He too was trying to reassure me though I knew perfectly well that he wouldn't be as efficient with the long sword he held now as he was with his two usual blades.

My heart threatened to stop when we heard the steps stop on the other side of the boulder.

Kili notched an arrow silently, frowning deeply and gravely.

Bofur let go of my hand to grab the hilt of the sword he held, his usual smile completely forgotten.

Fili readied himself to jump and fight, his face only reflecting determination.

Once more, I grabbed the blue bead of my braid and pressed it tightly between my fingers. I had forgotten how to breathe, and was silently praying to whatever lucky star was supposed to take care of me. Now was a good time to become useful.

I intently listened and felt tears burn behind my eyes when I heard grumbling voices and metal clanking not too far from us. At the same time as my three companions, I glanced towards the rather large group of people standing on the road, slightly further away from us.

They were short. Short and heavily armed. Short, heavily armed and hairy.

Dear lord, they were dwarves!

The relief I felt almost made me cry on the spot and I had difficulties swallowing the tears back. I could stop the surprised gasp that escaped my mouth though but I didn't see if it had made any of the dwarves react because I closed my eyes for a moment.

After several frozen seconds spent in silent shock and relief, we jumped from behind the boulder, shouting at them. When they turned to face us, weapons ready to be used, I could see they were dwarves looking ready to go to war. I saw their eyes widened and everyone was unmoving and silent for a second more before chaos exploded on the rocky mountain path.

I recognized Bifur, Gloin and Dwalin, leading the mad charge towards us but, oddly, they didn't scare me at all. Dwalin immediately came to my side and somehow that reassured me some more. His tall, bulky figure that stop just a step from me was already enough to make me feel safer. Gloin had gone straight to Bofur and was already questioning him while my head was still spinning with relief.

"We heard you were captured. What happened?" Gloin asked, voicing the other dwarves' concern but surprising us.

It was fairly easy to see we were shocked that they knew that, all our faces pictured in various ways our surprise. For my part, both my eyebrows raised toward my hairline.

"Did you receive a message already?" Bofur asked incredulity evident in his tone.

"That lad, Hector, he arrived two days ago at night saying their town had been attacked. We thought you'd need help." Dwalin added, explaining a bit more how they'd learn so quickly about the fight.

"We were attacked when we arrived, Fili and Bofur fought to let us escape." Kili said gesturing to me, smirking happily at the older warriors who now circled us.

"We got captured but then we all escaped thanks to Kili and Amelia." Fili replied, smiling widely, throwing one arm around his brother's shoulders obviously proud of him.

"Kili and Amelia?" It was Gloin's turn to sound surprised, though I would have appreciated that he didn't sound quite so disbelieving.

From the pout on his face, I could tell that Kili didn't quite like the astonished tone used by the older warrior either. On the other hand, if anyone had told me last week I would manage to help two dwarves escape from men…well, I wouldn't have believed it either.

"Aye. I must be getting old, being rescued by the two baby of the group!" Bofur's joke made all the dwarves around laugh heartily.

Bofur was soon laughing with his cousin Bifur and some other dwarves I didn't know, while Gloin was smiling proudly at the younger brothers who related with wide gestures the events. Meanwhile, to my utter surprise I found myself crushed against Dwalin's chest.

I really hadn't expected that from the grumpy dwarf.

I started to shiver as I put my shaky hand around his waist, hiding my face in the fur of his coat. I could feel emotions of all sorts bubbling and boiling in my chest and I had to concentrate in order not to let them explode. I couldn't lie though, in the exhausted and distraught state I was in, I was really glad for Dwalin's embrace. He squeezed me lightly and I heard him clear his throat. Apparently he wasn't one for public display of emotions, but the fact that he would do it for me was heartening. After a few minutes though, the poor grumpy warrior couldn't stand the silence between us and spoke.

"You've put my brother in quite a state girl." He grunted.

I peeked at him when I heard that, startled; my exhausted mind misconstrued the words as I started to think about all the worst scenarios possible. Balin was in quite a state. Quite a state?

"In a state? What state? What happened? Is it his heart? He's rather old…Oh my god, please tell me he didn't have a heart attack!" I shrieked, my voice gaining an octave as I spoke.

At that I apparently attracted everyone's attention and all dwarves stared at me both perplexed and concerned by my reaction. They all started to circle us but I didn't see them.

Meanwhile my mind focused on the worst possible scenario. After all, with the past weeks' events, I was rather set on morbid thoughts. My eyes widened in fright. What could a healer do in this world? In my head I saw a vivid picture of the sweet old Balin, his hand clutched on his chest, a painful grimace on his face.

"Lass, are you alright?" Bofur tried to ask me extremely cautiously.

"I've killed Balin…"

I'm not proud to admit I wailed quite pathetically. Had I not been too preoccupied by the imaginary death of the old dwarf, I would have laughed at the sight the dwarves made.

The mighty warriors, armed to the teeth and who were used to face everything and anything were completely dumbfounded at the sight of a short girl having a nervous breakdown. Dwalin was looking around, his fingers barely touching my shoulders, clearly afraid of moving or saying anything more. The poor dwarf was feeling guilty though he had no idea what he might have said to make me react so extremely.

Most of them looked afraid of me, not knowing what to do to make me stop crying.

Bifur was glaring at Dwalin, obviously thinking it was his fault, while Gloin was shaking his head from side to side, sighing. Apparently having a wife did make him slightly more understanding of the situation.

The others were mostly glancing from me to Fili, Kili and Bofur, wondering what could have happened to have me behave in such a way when there was clearly nothing to be unhappy about. My reaction appeared rather extreme and uncalled for as everything seemed to be ending well for us all.

Bofur shared a knowing look with Fili and Kili and the three tried to approach me as I left Dwalin's embrace to kneel on the ground, still crying and hiding my face behind my dirty hands. I wasn't sure why I was crying anymore. In some part of my mind, I objectively knew that Balin was most likely alive in the Halls. But then, why did I cry? Was it simply the relief? Or maybe it was all the pressure, stress and fear I had felt during these past days?

When Bofur put his hand on my back and I saw him and the two brothers kneeling nearby, all the memories of a dead body lying on the floor I had tried so hard to push away menaced to come back. I tried to force myself to focus on something, anything that would distract me. I glanced around feverishly, trying to spot something that would catch my attention and would make me forget for awhile longer. Then my eyes fell on Bofur's chest. Even though his coat was of dark colouring you could still easily see the large darker stain. It reminded me that he had held me after I had just…

Suddenly all the barriers I had put in my head to forget about that night's events tumbled down. I was remembering in vivid details everything that my brain had registered but that I still hadn't analyzed as of yet. Now though I could see the blade plunge repeatedly in the man's back, I saw the blood tainting my hands, my face and my coat. I felt the warm liquid pouring between my fingers. I heard the pathetic gurgle that the man had let out after the first hit. I saw the crimson blood.

I smelt it.

I tasted it.

I felt bile rise in my throat. My stomach churned violently and I desperately tried to stand up staggering away, with one hand clutched firmly on my mouth and my eyes wide but unseeing. I precipitated to the nearest boulder and leant on it to stay standing. My last effort to control my stomach failed and I ended up retching pitifully and rather violently. My stomach was almost empty after all those days walking with barely enough food to keep us going, but it didn't stop me from being sick.

I was somehow aware of hands holding my hair away from my face, while others supported all my weight because suddenly my limbs clearly refused to do the job. My whole body felt like lead and I didn't have enough strength to move it. Once my stomach decided to stop his rebellion, I lay completely numb in the arms of several dwarves, my knees had buckled at some point and I was now kneeling near the boulder. Dwalin mostly was supporting all my weight with one arm on my collarbone and one of his hands around my arm. It was Bofur who helped me hold my head and probably Fili or Kili who took care of my hair, holding them around my neck while rubbing my back soothingly.

I couldn't feel ashamed at the moment, I just felt terribly exhausted as tears poured from my eyes without me having any control of it.

At some point I registered that the dwarves around were trying to talk to me but I just hadn't enough willpower or strength left to answer them or to even listen.

The last thing I remember is one of them trying to help me drink some water but then…

I blacked out.

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><p>The feeling I experienced was probably the strangest I ever felt. I knew my body was slowly coming out of its torpor but my consciousness came back to me first. I slowly felt my mind clear from the dense fog that had obstructed it but my body just didn't respond to me. I wished my eyes to open, yet they remained close. I wished to moan or groan, yet I uttered no sound. I wished to move but my limbs remained lifeless.<p>

But even though the orders from my brain weren't obeyed, my body still managed to overflow my mind with information.

I was lying on the ground but there were probably quite a lot of coats under me because I could barely feel that stone digging in my shoulder. I was warm too, so I guessed the dwarves had put several other coats on top of me too, and probably lighted a fire as well because I could feel the warmth radiating from my left side. Then I could smell the odour of the pine and wood, so we probably hadn't move far from where we had met. I heard discussion going on around me and just knew that several dwarves were sitting quite close to where I was.

Instead of concentrating on their words though, I decided that now was as good a time as it would ever be for my body to finally wake up.

Ever so slowly I managed first to twitch my fingers and if I hadn't been the one suffering, I would have been rather curious about the difficulties I encountered. Who would have thought that moving a hand could become so hard? When I finally managed to move my right hand, I heard the discussion stop and then rushed steps that clearly came in my direction.

"Meli? Meli can you hear me?" I recognized Bofur's voice though I wasn't sure I had ever heard him sounding so worried before.

"Amelia? Amelia if you hear us, then can you please move your hand?" Was that Kili? He sounded nothing like he usually did.

It took me several excruciatingly long minutes to finally open my eyes. My eyelid felt like they were made of stone and my throat was dry and raw. I didn't have to say anything though because while Dwalin gently helped me in a sitting position, Fili brought a water skin to my lips and slowly poured water in my mouth.

I coughed a bit at first but I felt much better afterwards.

"What happened?" I croaked, my memories were completely muddled.

"You…" Kili started but didn't seem to know what to say.

"You lost it for a short while there, lass." Dwalin simply stated, still holding my back with his huge and strong arms.

"Aye, you scared us quite a bit." Fili added.

"You started to cry and then got sick." Bofur informed me while pressing his hand on my forehead. "You got a bit of fever but now it seems gone."

As I listened to them I slowly regained some strength and my brain finally started to provide me with foggy memories. The headache that was pounding behind my eyes wasn't helping either.

"I remember…Balin? Did something happen to Balin?" My brain even if it was functioning normally seemed to have occulted all the previous events.

"Balin is fine lass, right Dwalin?" Bofur quickly said, as if afraid of something but I couldn't quite put my finger on what should worry him.

"Aye, he's just reviewing the contracts."

That puzzled me and didn't help my sluggish thoughts whatsoever.

"Contracts?" I asked with a frown.

"Aye, he's looking for favours men owe us."

That didn't explain anything and it must have shown on my face for Bofur gently added while I tried to massage my temples with my fingertips.

"He's preparing to ask for favours, so that those people helped them come at our rescue. Dori and Ori are helping him apparently."

"Oh"

I had nothing more to add. I was tired, so very tired. My head hurt and I forced myself to drink the fresh water Fili had given me. The dwarves stayed close to me for the next minutes, talking between themselves. Kili only stood up to grab some bowl with warm stew in it. As Dwalin held me, Bofur helped me eat and I felt my cheeks burn with embarrassment.

"Oy, Meli, no need to blush. Nori would have my head if I don't deliver you back in perfect health." Bofur joked.

I smiled a bit at his words but it still didn't help me forget that those two grown men, those two warriors were playing nurses at my side.

"He wanted to come but Thorin forbade it." Dwalin added, but he was talking to Bofur, not me.

Bofur simply nodded understandingly and even though I was curious about this, I really didn't feel like concentrating on what would probably be a serious discussion.

The more I ate and the more strength I finally managed to gather. I had been cautious at first, afraid that putting food in my stomach would just make me sick again. After several tentative bites, I gathered that I was fine and I ate slowly the whole content of the bowl. Soon I could sit by myself again without Dwalin's help. I was grateful to see my body was quick to recover though it also meant that my memories started to clear too. At first I was ashamed and appalled at how I had reacted earlier. Then the more I stupidly thought about it, the more I replayed the events of the shed in my head.

I felt my stomach churn once again but managed to keep the stew down. I swallowed thickly while the dwarves discussed around me. I'll soon break down again, I knew it. I needed to get going and occupy my mind with something else than gloomy thoughts. A flash of red in front of my eyes made the blood drain from my face. I shakily tried to stand up but was halted by Dwalin's large hand on my shoulder.

"We stay here and camp for the night lass."

"But the others." I tried to say, thinking about how our friends in Thorin's Halls were probably worried.

"Look around lass, it's just the five of us. Gloin and Bifur went back there immediately earlier. They'll arrive maybe half a day before us in Thorin's Halls. The others moved towards that town, but that's not important. Tonight we sleep, you all need it."

"Please, Bofur, Dwalin can we go now. I want to go home." I whispered brokenly.

Bofur sent me a sad look and shook his head negatively.

"It wouldn't do you any good to go now. Night has fallen anyway. Tonight we sleep and we'll leave early tomorrow."

At his words I finally realized that the night had indeed fallen though I hadn't paid any attention to it. I just wanted to go home and I didn't understand why we couldn't. Well I wasn't being entirely honest because I knew that I wouldn't have been physically able to do much walking, but staying here while dwelling on my thoughts seemed like a terrible idea. The worst idea ever actually.

"Don't you have something in your satchel that'll help you sleep?" Bofur asked me, surprising me a bit.

"Er…"

I was shocked to realize it took me several minutes to gather my thoughts and answer. Maybe the dwarves were right, maybe I should sleep a bit. I tiredly looked around our small camp and realized that Fili was actually already sleeping. Kili for his part was rummaging in my bag until he brought out my medicinal satchel. I looked at Bofur and could only think about one thing to say at the moment.

"You should sleep too, you've been hurt."

At that both Kili and Bofur smiled wide, toothy grins.

"There's our little Amelia back." Kili said joyously. "Do you want me to wake Fili so he can strip just for you?"

I heard Dwalin choke behind me while Bofur roared with laughter. The dwarf's laughter was short lived though as he suddenly winced and brought his hand on his chest. I stared for a minute at Kili who seemed to be anxiously waiting for something until a retort found its way in my head. I licked my dried lips and hesitated for all but a second. Then I simply smiled softly before telling him.

"You're just jealous."

At that Kili's smile widened and I understood what the young dwarf had tried to do. I gave him a small grateful smile and he nodded. Kili had just wanted to cheer me up, to see I was still there, able to banter stupidly with him about silly things. To be honest I probably was just as relieved as he was when we both realized that I indeed could still tease him.

"Here." The young dwarf said next before handing me my satchel.

I rummaged through it for a bit before taking one small leather pouch and opening it. Oin always told me to check twice to make sure what plant was in the bag.

'Use your eyes and your nose!' He would always say.

So that's what I did. Even exhausted as I was I checked and smelt the plant in the small pouch before I handed it back to Kili.

"Can you prepare an infusion with this?" I told him when he took the pouch. "Just take two, no three spoons of the dried plant in a full bowl of boiling water, please." I instructed and he nodded eagerly. "And please add one spoon of this." I handed him a second pouch that contained dried mint leaves.

Kili smiled before going back to the fire that was rather close. He busied himself with putting some water to boil and I could hear him repeat softly the instructions I had given. While he was occupied the two older dwarves shifted to both face me and Bofur kindly spoke.

"Meli, Amelia, how are you feeling?"

I pondered a bit before I answered as honestly as possible.

"I'm exhausted Bofur. Just…really exhausted." I breathed out shakily. "I want to go home."

"And about…" He clearly hesitated and I felt a lump in my throat.

I squeezed my eyes shut for a second, clenching my fists tightly. I really didn't think now was a good time to think about…that. I knew Bofur was thinking well, I knew he wanted to help, but right now I didn't want to remember.

"I don't." I started before shaking my head. "I can't speak about that now."

My voice had been so low that it was a wonder the both of them heard me. Bofur just nodded but I saw Dwalin's eyes narrow at me. He shrugged and grunted before leaning slightly forward, staring right into my eyes.

"Lass, we understand."

On those simple three words, Dwalin stood and left to sit on a fallen trunk nearby. Bofur patted my knee kindly and told me softly.

"Dwalin is gonna keep watch tonight. Take the infusion and try and sleep, alright?"

"Take some of it too Bofur." I answered before rubbing my forehead with my hand. "Wait. Now we have water and fire, you should probably drink something for the pain."

"It's fine you…" He tried to say but I glared at him.

"I might be tired, but I'm still your healer. Tell Kili to put some more water to boil."

He didn't need to tell anything, Kili had heard me perfectly and was already adding water in the small cauldron that had contained the stew. He then poured the content of the second pan he had used in a bowl and brought me my own infusion. Once more I could tell they simply obeyed in order to allow my mind to focus on anything else besides my own memories. It was sweet of them to be like that, but it didn't work that well. I knew they were trying to keep my mind off certain things so I was completely aware of what those things were. Stupid brain.

Focusing on the matter at hand, I cleared my throat and tried to assess logically what should be done right now. I was a healer. I was responsible of my companions' health.

"You'll have to wake Fili too. He needs sleep and rest, but I'm rather sure he'd be entirely too sore tomorrow if he doesn't drink something now. Actually I should probably prepare a salve or ointment…maybe a poultice could be more efficient."

I was rambling and I knew it. Everyone around knew it. Still they let me ramble and think aloud about what plant would be best to use while I was rummaging around in my bag, still sitting in the same spot. From time to time I would sip my own infusion while looking at the few ingredients I had with me. It didn't take me that long to prepare a blend for them to drink and I still had some ointment left in my small jar. After Kili promised me several times that he would make sure that both Bofur and Fili would redo their bandages, I finally let myself lie down and fall asleep.

The night was short but I was glad not to have experienced any nightmares or dreams of any sort. I had been simply too exhausted. To be honest I still was exhausted. The stress of the days spent running away, worrying about human men coming back to kill us, was finally catching me.

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><p>In the end we rather silently made our way back to Thorin's Halls, walking as quickly as we could. Except for Dwalin, we were all tired but none of us wanted to spend one more night outside of our beds. So we pushed it. Maybe we shouldn't have, but truly, I didn't care. I'd rather be exhausted and sleep for three days straight than be sleeping outside for one more night. I just wanted to be home. I wanted to see Dori and Ori. I wanted to hear Nori call me 'Mizimul' and forget about this whole debacle.<p>

This time around, even the sight of the massive doors didn't manage to stir me from my tired torpor. Even though the night had fallen a few hours ago, the entrance doors were still open, which surprised me greatly. It probably meant that the dwarves were waiting for us, hoping to see us arrive even during the night. Unsurprisingly, Gloin was at the door with a few other dwarves, guarding it.

I didn't react at all and simply followed Bofur, not answering to Gloin's welcoming greetings as the doors closed behind us.

"Thorin's wants to see you all as soon as you come in." Gloin said sheepishly.

Hearing that I sighed deeply. What did the King want? Couldn't he wait a bit? Couldn't we simply go and sleep? Besides, I really had to tell Bofur and Fili to go and see Oin. Even though I had done my best, I had been tired and on the run when I had treated them. It would be better if Oin could check their various injuries at least once.

"Do we have to?" Kili moaned, voicing my exact thoughts.

"Well, he's been furious since the human lad came barging in the Halls. I'd really not advise you to upset him further." Gloin shrugged apologetically.

He was furious? And what about us? We had been attacked and had to run away like prisoners escaping. Couldn't the King just give us one night of sleep? Was it seriously so important that he knew all the details of our ordeal now?

"Does he want to see all of us?" Bofur asked, sending me a worried look.

"Aye. He wants to hear exactly what happened."

"We don't need to be all present for that." Fili tried to protest clearly trying to help both his brother and me.

During all this discussion we had kept walking towards the large room where I had sworn that oath so long ago. The King was there already, talking heatedly with Balin. As soon as he saw us though, he turned around and strode to meet us in the middle of the room. He quickly went to embrace Kili and Fili at the same time and I bit my tongue not to snap at him; Fili was injured, he should be more careful. But the embrace was short lived as the King took a step back, nodded at his nephews and then glanced at me before finally staring at Bofur.

"I've been told some things happened, I want all the details, now." He ordered sharply.

I snorted at that, I couldn't help myself, because that truly was the understatement of the century. The icy blue eyes left Bofur's face to look at me. I met with the King's gaze with my own steely green eyes. I saw him quirk an eyebrow at that but neither of us reacted more than that.

"Uncle, can't it wait a bit?" Fili sounded tired, and I knew he was.

"Fili I'm glad to see you're both fine, but right now, you have to explain yourselves. Tell me what happened."

"Explain ourselves?" I couldn't help but mutter with a frown.

Wait, did he think it was our fault? I thought that the man, Hector, had explained to him what had happened. I had imagined Hector told him that either the peasants were attacked or that they had hired the mercenaries; anything really that explained why the men would attack us on sight. At that moment I remembered the scared look of the woman, her words, and the worry in her eyes. Maybe the peasants truly hadn't hired the mercenaries. But why would mercenaries attack such a small and dingy town? And why would they call us thieves if it wasn't the villagers' own words and worries? My head was starting to ache again as too many thoughts swirled in my exhausted mind. I was brought out of my musing by the King's sharp voice.

"Aye. I want to know what you did to anger those humans."

There was a short pause at that. Alright, what had Hector said exactly?

"Wait uncle, we didn't do anything." Fili retorted, being the first to recover from the surprise.

"I thought a human lad had told you already what happened in that town." Bofur frowned.

"The man is in our jails right now. I can't trust him, much less his words." The King spat.

"So you'd rather believe we did something wrong?" I couldn't help but snort again; I was just too tired to be polite.

Diplomacy could be damned. I was tired and my mind was a total wreck. I had barely managed to push back thoughts of what had happened, I wasn't stupid, I knew I couldn't deal with it by myself. I needed at the very least Nori's arms around me, and probably Ori and Dori too to be able to talk about it. I honestly didn't care much about the King right now, and really, the situation was getting so ridiculous that it was funny.

"I don't believe anything Miss Amelia." The King growled at me while I was surprised to see Balin glare at him. "And that's why I want you all to explain what happened."

"Alright Your Majesty." I gritted through my teeth.

Balin's eyes found mine and I saw how concerned and surprised he was. I looked at Bofur who was staring at me with wide eyes while slightly shaking his head. Apparently the tone of my voice, or maybe it was the words, had shocked everyone because all the dwarves looked at me with various emotions displayed on their faces. I guessed now wasn't a good time to behave like a sarcastic child. Bofur seemed both shocked and slightly scared by my behaviour. I glared at him, annoyed by the situation, before I lowered my gaze to the floor, ignoring them all.

I knew the King was about to retort sharply or at least say something, but I didn't care at all at the moment. I only looked up when I heard noise coming from behind me. I glanced above my shoulder to see what it was as Dori came barrelling through the door, quickly followed by Nori and Ori and a little further away to my surprise, Bifur.

"Amelia! Have you been hurt? Why did it take so long for you all to come back? Why didn't you come with Gloin and Bifur?" Dori's voice expressed how afraid he had been.

My body reacted on itself, I couldn't help it. I evaded Dwalin's hand when he tried to stop me and I rushed to the three brothers. For a second, my exhaustion was forgotten as I wanted nothing more than to be with the three dwarves I had missed so much.

They probably picked up that something was wrong because their concerned yet happy faces turned full worried when I almost literally jumped in Dori's arms. The bloodied front of my coat had probably been a dead giveaway that something bad had indeed happened once again in the lovely town of Gorm. As I wrapped my arms around Dori he quickly put his owns around me, patting my back gently. I could still hear the other dwarves talking behind but I didn't care.

I did wonder though whether Thorin had told them what had been happening or if they had been kept in the dark. But this thought was short lived, right now the only thing that mattered to me was that the three brothers were there.

Nori was just a few steps behind Dori. From above Dori's shoulder I met Nori's gaze. He looked more worried than I had ever seen him. His face was emotionless but his grey eyes were speaking as clearly to me as his voice would have. The emotion was evident in his gaze as it roamed over my face, probably looking for information on what had happened. I saw his brows first rise in surprise then lower into a frown. He must have seen something in my eyes too, I don't know what exactly, but suddenly his eyes turned angry.

He walked to us and patted once on his brother shoulder. I saw Dori glance at him before he released me from his hold. At first I felt hurt but then I understood why he did it.

As soon as Nori's arms brought me against his chest I let my arms snake around his waist. I hid my face in his shoulder, just having the time to catch a glimpse of Ori's worried expression. I closed my eyes and sighed. Nori's arms held me tightly and I was clutching at the back of his tunic. I couldn't be close enough to him. I could smell a strange mix of tobacco and something else, leather maybe. Nori's familiar scent. I strengthened my grasp on him and he reacted similarly, bringing me impossibly close to him.

Being near him, being held by him made a small part of my heart alight with joy. My fears, worries and pain were still brewing just underneath the surface but I could hold them in for a short while longer. That is, if Nori's arms didn't relinquish their hold. I hadn't realized until that moment how dependent on Nori I was starting to become. On him and his brothers.

Obviously this simple moment had to be broken by the other dwarves and their stupid dispute as to whether or not we should discuss the events right now.

"She's barely back and you want to interrogate her?" Dori sounded offended and I gazed up turning my head slightly to look at the scene from the corner of my eyes.

Dori and Ori were placed in front of me and Nori, seemingly creating a barrier that the other dwarves hadn't tried to breach yet. Ori was quite impressive with his arms crossed on his chest and a very determined look in his eyes. My sweet, calm Ori looked so fierce at this moment, and I felt an odd feeling of pride for him spread in my chest. At that instant he looked every bit the dwarf warrior, just like any other dwarf around. He was impressive and he was protecting me…my heart started to swell with gratitude and warmth.

Dori was looking even fiercer. His sleeves were rolled back above his elbows and for the first time I saw the impressive size of his arms. He probably was as strong, if not stronger, than Dwalin. He had crossed his arms on his chest too but he did look way stronger than Ori. I couldn't see his face but from the tone of his voice I knew his eyes were probably glaring at the others, King included. The gratitude and warmth expanded tenfold.

From the corner of my eyes I could see that Bofur and Bifur were standing a little apart from all the others, clearly not intending to take any side in this matter. I couldn't really blame them for that. Fili and Kili were silent too, probably having decided that talking now wasn't such a good idea; what with their uncle currently growling and snarling at everyone and especially at Dori who held his ground unfazed.

Dwalin was now standing beside his King, as was Gloin, and I was impressed by their indefectible loyalty toward our groaning and snarling leader. The surprise though, was that Balin seemed to be on our side this time, trying to negotiate with the King, hoping he could simply wait for the morning before talking with the four of us. I felt suddenly so lucky to have Dori and Balin as my guardians. They were doing their best at protecting me, even from their leader.

I then looked up slightly, trying to see Nori's face.

Nori looked calm. Entirely too calm. It felt odd to see him appear so emotionless when both his brothers were angry. I trailed my eyes on his features, analyzing every little detail. His mouth was set in a thin, grim line, which told me he wasn't so indifferent as he was trying to appear. I then glimpsed at his eyes to see the same tightly reigned fury I had seen a few times only. Nori was a master at hiding his feelings, but apparently this time his emotions were just too strong to be properly hidden, at least for someone who took the time to look.

I shivered and he must have felt it for his eyes immediately looked down at me. In a heartbeat, the thunder in his gaze dissolved and I was amazed to only discern care and concern. There was something else though. Something I couldn't quite place.

My heart skipped a beat but I didn't ponder on it.

For now the only thing that mattered to me was that Nori wouldn't let his anger explode at the King's face. There was no doubt in my mind that he was perfectly able to yell at his leader and I was quite certain too that said King wouldn't appreciate the blunt honesty.

Nori seemed to observe me for awhile, looking and apparently searching for something in my eyes. I hadn't even realized our gazes were locked. I didn't know how much time we spent like this; I was completely oblivious to our surroundings. At some point, he seemed to have found what he was looking for and I was forced to blink at his next action.

Nori winked at me. Nori had just winked at me.

In this whole mess, this dwarf was cheeky enough to dare wink at me.

I couldn't fight against the small smirk that tugged at the corner of my lips.

Nori smirked back smugly in answer.

Strangely I felt as if nothing else really mattered anymore. The brothers were defending me, protecting me, even against their own King. How could I dwell on my pain in such a situation?

I couldn't forget it entirely but a small weight was already being lifted from my shoulders.

Nori squeezed my waist lightly and raised one of his masterfully braided eyebrows a bit, it was barely noticeable and I wouldn't have seen it hadn't I been looking at him directly. I interpreted it as a question about how I was feeling. I nodded ever so slightly to let him know I was as alright as could be and he seemed satisfied with this. His gaze turned stern and icy again and he went back to glare at the other dwarves who were still quarrelling around us.

I closed my eyes tightly and tried to nuzzle closer still to Nori's chest. I felt one of his hands flat against my back while his other one moved to my head. His warm fingers brushed some of my hair away, lightly grazing my neck and I felt my skin tickle a bit. I suppressed a small smile and just sighed. I was feeling so safe. When was the last time I had felt so protected? I could bet that whenever it was, Nori had been here.

At the moment I didn't even hear the voices of the quarrelling dwarves around anymore. It was only when I heard Dís shouting that I peeked up again.

My gaze fell on the princess of our Halls and I would have flinched away hadn't it been for Nori's arms around my waist. She looked furious.

"What is going on here?" Dís shouted above the noise.

The other dwarves stopped talking altogether as Kili bounced and strode quickly to his mother, a huge smile on his lips.

"Hey Ma."

Instead of a hug though, the young dwarf received a slap on the head.

"Ow, what is that for?" He complained, bringing both his hand to his head, rubbing the spot that had been hit.

"Don't 'Hey Ma' me you idiot!" Dís snapped. "Can you imagine how worried I was when this man came in, talking about mercenaries and murders and prisoners?"

She then grabbed her son's right arm and tugged him towards her. It was clear that she had been scared for them. I could see it in the way she tightly hugged Kili, clutching at him as if worried he would go away. In the meantime Fili walked towards them and I saw Dís eyes narrow at the sight of her son's face; the bruises were fading but still painfully visible. I couldn't help but smile when I saw Fili lean a bit forward, waiting for his mother to slap the top of his head, which she did, before she hugged him too.

I glanced up at Nori and saw that I wasn't the only one finding this display both funny and heart warming.

Even though I had found this little scene oddly cute, I couldn't help but cringe when Dís exclaimed next, sounding more scared than anything.

"Is that your blood?" She was looking at Kili's coat before turning her sharp eyes to Fili. "And you too! Whose blood is this, are you hurt?"

I had never seen Dís so…uncollected. But at the moment I didn't really pay attention to it. My mind was once more assailed with gory images I wished I could forget. Blood in itself didn't disturb me. I could go as far as saying that bloody wounds didn't faze me either, unless they happened to be on some specific dwarves. Death was also something I had come to term with. But it was the combination of all those elements with the added factor that I had been the one inflicting the deadly wound in a fit of sheer rage, that made my stomach churn once more and my knees go weak.

I saw black spots in front of my eyes and hadn't it been for Nori's arms around my waist, I would have fallen at that moment.

"Amelia." He breathed out worriedly, tightening his hold on me to prevent me from falling.

At the same moment the others turned to look at me and I only managed to see Dís eyes narrow at me before I closed my eyes. I had to focus in order not to be sick right now.

"Mahal, she's white as snow." Dís said and I guessed the hand I felt on my forehead was hers."Why didn't you bring her home? She needs rest!" Dís asked angrily.

"We would have if Thorin would just let us." Dori snapped then and I opened my eyes weakly.

I could see the dwarves were more or less circling me and Nori. The King was scowling but when I met his gaze I could have sworn he looked concerned…slightly concerned. That didn't stop him from frowning though. Dori was boiling with anger and I would have never guessed that Ori could look so angry. Dís was just next to me and she patted my cheek, forcing me to look at her.

"Amelia, were you hurt anywhere?" She asked and I felt Nori tense.

"She wasn't hurt Ma." Kili provided softly, apparently guessing I wasn't really thinking straight right now.

"She looks hurt to me." Ori retorted.

"And there's blood on her coat." Dori added.

"Oh god…" I managed to breathe out before my knees buckled.

Nori reacted immediately, holding me up while I heard several gasps and a worried cry from Ori. I felt my hands clutch at Nori's coat and I squeezed my eyes shut. Throwing up in front of everyone wasn't really on my To-Do list of the day. I felt bile rise in my throat and tried to focus on anything except that awful feeling, mentally repeating lists of medicinal plants and their properties. I took a deep breath and noted once more the smell of tobacco smoke that seemed to cling on Nori's clothes.

That was as good a diversion as any. Better than the lists of medicinal plants even. I took another deep breath, trying to both calm my stomach and catch a bit of the scent.

"I'll take her home now." I heard Nori say and his voice clearly stated that he didn't care about any objections anyone could have.

He scooped me up in his arms and I instantly buried my face in his shoulder. Without anymore words I felt him start to stride away from the other dwarves. Glancing above his shoulder I saw Dori and Ori still putting up quite a front against the King. I was uncertain as to whether I should be surprised to see Dís quite clearly side against her own brother.

At the moment only a few things truly mattered. The brothers were still there for me, still protecting me fiercely and I couldn't even begin to express how glad I was for that. Seeing them as they stood up against the King had both frightened me and heartened me. I was glad they had acted like this if I were entirely honest.

Right now Nori was taking me away from the whole scene and I was relieved he did it too. I couldn't begin to tell him how grateful I was. But then again I shouldn't be surprised as Nori always took care of me. Except for those months when we fought, I had always been able to count on him. Nori protected me and I relished in the happy feeling and the certitude that he would keep doing so in the future.

Nori and I remained silent while he carried me like a princess back home. I was glad not to meet anyone on our way there, but seeing as I didn't recognize most of the corridors we passed through, I found out it wasn't just luck. Nori was clearly taking a detour in order for us to avoid the curious crowds of dwarves. At that moment I felt more thankful than ever for my cheeky thief's cleverness.

My cheeky thief…

My thief?

My thief?!

Where had that come from?

Nori glanced at me when I jolted slightly in his arms but he didn't say a word.

My mind was once more whirling with one too many thoughts and I had to quickly calm down if I didn't want to have another breakdown. Gingerly I nuzzled my head closer to his neck. Hiding my face in his beard and feeling finally at peace when his particular scent hit me once more.

I would have to think about many things, analyze the feelings and the thoughts, but it could wait.

Right now I didn't want to think about where some words uttered in the safety and privacy of my mind had come from. Right now I just wanted to stay close to Nori and let all the pent-up fear and pain flow away from me. I didn't know how or why, but I had this certainty that Nori would be able to help me put some order in those specific feelings at least, if not the others more incomprehensible ones.

Right now, nothing much mattered beside the fact that I was home…at long last.

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><p><strong>AN: Hello everyone! First a HUGE thanks to you all! I'm really so happy to see that you enjoy this story as much as I enjoy writing it!**

**so thanks to every reader, amazing reviewers/followers! Thanks Thanks and Thanks again!**

**Now, I hoped you enjoyed this chapter. I wanted to upload it yesterday, but Wednesdays are rather busy days for me and I was struck by inspiration so I chose to write another chapter instead of editing this one. **

**Even I couldn't be that mean with Amelia, she deserved to have dwarves coming to the rescue, not more troubles :) Though I won't lie, it was tempting to have them caught again by the mercenaries.**

**I'm sorry for those of you who were a bit bothered by the violence in last chapter, I'm sure you understand that I can't let her forget about it quite so soon. It shouldn't happen often but do expect some of it here and there (though I'll try to avoid graphic descriptions)**

**Now, as you can see she's back in the halls and I hope you're all happy with how things are (slowly) moving along in the romance part of this story.**

**As for the lovely town of Gorm...you'll learn a bit more in later chapter(s), though I already hinted at various possibilities. **

**If everything goes as planned, I should be able to update the next chapter late in the afternoon on Sunday (or in the evening)**

**Thanks again for all the support and kind reviews! **


	23. Healer's Hands, Killer's Hands

**Everything belongs to JRRTolkien, except for my OC and the plot.**

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><p>Nori hadn't left my side since he first took me in his arms in front of the King. When we had finally arrived at the door, he had gingerly allowed me back to my feet, one of his arms still around my waist to prevent me from falling down. At the moment I felt as if I had no more strength at all and I was more than grateful for his support as I leant heavily against him. I was tired but that wasn't really what was disturbing me most right now.<p>

Nori had opened the door quickly and had swiftly picked me up again, carrying me through the threshold and into the dimly lighted room. The fire in the hearth was burning low and the bright red embers provided a warm and welcoming glow to the room.

"Do you think you can stand?" He asked me softly, tearing me from my thoughts.

To be honest, I wasn't sure my legs would cooperate, but I still nodded. Seeing my hesitation, Nori walked to one of the armchairs and lowered me slowly to the ground. He let me stand by myself just next to it so that I could sit quickly if I were to fall. My legs shook a bit at first but other than that I managed to stay upright without his assistance. Still, Nori was hovering nearby, ready to catch me, and kept observing me intently.

I took a deep breath in order to soothe my nerves a bit when Nori decided to speak once more.

"You should remove this coat."

I glanced at him and I saw how worried he was. His eyes didn't leave me for a second and he was clearly tense, as if waiting for something bad to happen, preparing himself to react quickly. His concern warmed my heart but I realized that I didn't like seeing him like that. I wanted to let him know I was fine, or at least that I would be.

I managed a small, very small and uncertain, smile at him but it didn't do anything to ease his concern. As his words still rang in my head, I swallowed thickly and looked down at myself. It was fairly easy to spot the dark stain that covered my front where most of the blood had spurted, and then the smaller stains where the blood droplets had splashed. Suddenly my face remembered the feeling of warm liquid being splattered on it and I felt lightheaded.

Immediately as I started to sway on my feet, Nori's strong hands caught my waist and helped me find some more balance.

"Easy there, you should sit down a bit." Nori sounded really scared right then and I found it odd, unnatural even while I felt my legs give away under me.

It was only thanks to Nori that I didn't painfully hit the floor. He gently held me, lowering me slowly until I sat on the ground with my back against the chair.

I could have noticed how cautious and gentle he was being, but at the moment my attention had been caught by my own appearance. The front of my coat was a strange mess of black and dark earthy brown, the fur was stuck in dirty tufts and all in all it was damn easy to see I had killed someone or something. Actually it looked as if I had bathed in the blood of a poor victim.

I shouldn't have thought that.

Why did I think of that?

Oh god…

The lump in my throat grew improbably tight and I my breathing became erratic. I felt the blood drain from my face and large, tangled knots settle in my stomach.

In a pitiful repeat of what had happened in front of Dwalin and the others, my mind drifted away from the present. All the events that had occurred during our escape came back with the same accurate and incredible details; the sounds of the blade penetrating the man's back and neck were playing once more in my ears. I could smell the tangy, coppery smell of blood. I could feel each strike reverberating in my bones.

It struck me then that I had probably resembled a mad, psychotic woman, while I had stabbed this man not once, but repeatedly.

I brought a trembling hand to my lips and managed to mutter while closing my eyes to concentrate on anything else.

"I think I'm going to be sick…"

Nori almost jumped to his feet in a mere second and I barely had the time to register he had left my side that he was already back with a wooden bucket in hands. I bent over it and emptied my stomach as my body was shaking through violent spasms, again.

In a corner of my mind I could feel one of Nori's hands on my forehead and another one holding my hair away from my face. I probably should have felt ashamed that he saw me in such a position, but at the moment my mind was otherwise occupied. His hand felt cool against my skin and I could only be grateful for his help. It took way to long in my opinion for my stomach to calm down and my cheeks were wet from tears when I finally felt well enough to sit back on my knees.

Nori helped me lean back against the armchair's side before he hurried away. He brought me a glass of cool water and helped me drink it. He was holding the glass with me, my hands were shaking rather strongly and I wasn't sure I could hold the cup myself. I was entirely too tired to react or be surprised when I felt his left hand brush away the tears that had marred my cheeks.

The soft caress was so light against my skin I thought at first I had dreamt it. Yet when I managed to focus my eyes, I saw and clearly felt his hand brushing against my skin.

We were both silent but his sole presence nearby was enough to calm and sooth me. When I had calmed down he gingerly gathered me in his arms once more and sat me in the chair I had leant against. His eyes seemed to never leave me for long, not even when he added some more wood in the fire to rekindle it.

"Do you want some chamomile?" He asked softly from his spot near the hearth.

I couldn't help but smile a bit at that. It was so unusual for Nori to be the one asking that. Still it only highlighted how well he knew me. He appeared to relax a bit when he saw my smile and only then did I realize how truly tense he had really been until that moment. I nodded and he quickly disappeared in the shadows of the kitchen.

Left alone for the moment I reclined in the chair and closed my eyes. The events of the past week seemed almost unreal. So unreal in fact that I couldn't help but wonder if they had really happen. But then from time to time the blur of colours and images came into focus, leaving me sick and scared. I remembered how I had reacted after poisoning the villagers; anger and fear had battled for dominance.

Now though I wasn't afraid of the dwarves' reaction: I perfectly knew they would find it rather normal to kill someone in order to protect another dwarf, a friend. I wasn't angry either. I wasn't that stupid; I knew the man was about to kill Fili and I'd rather kill him a hundred times over than let that happen.

No.

I wasn't angry at myself for my actions.

I wasn't angry at the dwarves for being captured either. I knew they had put up a hell of a fight in order to allow both Kili and I to escape.

I wasn't angry at the men either per se. I simply despised and hated them.

Really. This situation was just completely different.

But I was scared. More scared than ever. And what scared me was myself.

How could I not be afraid when I remembered the rage and the madness that had controlled my body for a terrifying long moment?

Who wouldn't be afraid of this sensation?

My thoughts were interrupted when Nori came back. I observed him as he knelt in front of me. I felt as if my mind was wide awake but my body didn't appear to be. I simply looked as Nori slowly worked on the laces of my coat that had been glued and stuck by clotted blood and dirt. He then gently took one of my hands in his and gingerly helped me remove one of my sleeves, then repeating the same kind, almost tender gestures with my second arm. He took the offending garment away from me and I hid my face in my hands, breathing slowly.

Nori though gently took my hands away from my face and it was only when I felt then warm cloth against my skin that I realized he was washing my hands. I hadn't even seen the small wooden bowl full of steaming water until then. I saw that my hands were shaking terribly, but I couldn't actually feel it. Still, little by little Nori removed the dirt and grime that coated them. He was completely focused on his task which allowed me to observe him.

His brows were furrowed in a deep frown, but that only managed to focus my gaze on the braids and beads in them. My eyes then slowly drifted to the other braids he adorned in his weird yet oddly appealing hairdo before I once more stared at his beard. It was so strange. I had never thought anything about beards. In my previous world, it was rather rare to see anyone sport a beard and if they did, it was nothing alike the dwarves' pieces of art. But Nori's beard was just so fascinating for me, so impressive. It was unlike the others, the multitude of braids and that wove together, intertwining, seemed to always catch my eyes.

But instead of staring at the beads that clasped the end of his braids, I let my gaze move up to look at his mouth. Hadn't I be that tired, I would have smiled at the little pout he made at the moment. It is only when my eyes looked at his though, that I felt something start to slowly stir in me. His beautiful grey eyes seemed to always hide some secret. They contained so much mischief and were so tender sometimes.

I blinked when Nori stood quickly without looking at me and I glimpsed at my hands. I hadn't even realized Nori had let them go. He soon disappeared in the shadows with my coat, and came back holding a steaming cup. Once more he knelt beside me and gave me the drink silently.

"Amelia, can you talk to me?" He whispered still so softly as I took the cup.

The warmth of the object seemed to radiate in my hands, chasing the cold away from my tired fingers. I didn't look at Nori and remained silent. I truly wanted to talk, but what should I say? 'Hey Nori, how are you? Me? I'm fine, just killed a huge dude the other day…'

I flinched.

At the same time, Nori had been trying to get my attention by grazing my cheek.

My eyes immediately found him after I had jolted and he had jerked his hand away. I saw a flash of hurt in his eyes and it pained me more than I thought it could.

"Nori" I managed to croak.

It seemed to freeze him on the spot and he waited for me to say something more. He was observing me but his face was once more completely blank.

"I…" I took a deep breath and locked my eyes in his. "I killed someone."

At the sound of it being voiced, tears welled in my eyes. My heart clenched. Nori reacted quickly. He took the cup away from my hands and put it aside. Slowly, as if afraid I would react badly, he cradled my face in his large hands, his thumbs brushing away the tears.

"Mizimul, you…"

He didn't have the time to finish his thought though, because we heard the door open. Nori's hands jerked away from me. I felt the loss intensely, which surprised me greatly. I didn't know I would react like that. Looking up I saw that Nori was handing me the cup of chamomile once more while Ori was coming in the room.

"Amee" Ori exclaimed while quickly coming to my side, engulfing me in his arms.

I smiled. Tears and pain were forgotten. My spirit lifted and I felt at home. I felt fine. Everything was fine for now and I didn't need to worry anymore. For now, I could just relish in the warmth the two brothers so kindly offered me. Nori though did admonish his younger brother slightly.

"Ori, be careful, she's holding a cup."

"Oh…sorry Amelia"

"It's fine." I managed to squeak.

"Do you want to sit here for a bit or do you want to go in your room?" Nori asked me softly.

"I want to stay with you, if you don't mind."

He quirked an eyebrow at me, as if surprised by my words, but nodded and decided to sit next to me. He leant slightly against the small coffee table while he put a comforting hand on my knee. Ori was kneeling at my right, observing me carefully. The two brothers let me finish my cup quietly, soothing me by their mere presence. Nori's hand was softly brushing against my knee and his eyes were fixed on my face. It hurt to see him so worried. Ori wasn't much better, his hands were on the armchair and he seemed to be waiting for something. His fidgeting wasn't discreet.

At that moment, Dori came in quietly and he only glanced at us before sitting in his usual chair. One of his hands was pensively brushing his perfectly braided beard and he remained as silent as his brothers. I couldn't help but note the deep frown on his face and it made me slightly uneasy.

I suddenly had the hunch that they knew what was ailing at me.

And in a second it wasn't a mere hunch anymore.

"You know." I said in a breath, certain about it.

I had told Nori, but there was no doubt in my mind that Ori and Dori had found out after talking with any of the other dwarves, probably Bofur. The three brothers looked at each other and it confirmed my thoughts. They all knew. Seeing that I had started to tremble again, Ori took the cup and put it on the table while Nori stood to sit on my armchair.

"Do you wish to talk about this?" Nori's voice was so low, like a deep rumble, yet I understood him perfectly.

I frowned, unsure about what I should answer, about what I wanted to answer. The brothers were observing me but chose to wait for me to talk instead of forcing the words out. We remained silent until Dori ordered Ori in an exasperated tone to sit down properly and to stop kneeling on the floor. Ori protested weakly as he stood up, claiming he was an adult while Dori simply reiterated his order. Their usual banter made me smirk. I knew they were doing it simply for the sake of habits. They knew it would help me, I didn't know how, but somehow they knew.

These three dwarves were amazing.

They were obviously pretty attentive to my every move. My lips had barely parted that they were all silent, eyes riveted on me.

"I…I killed someone." I took a deep, shaky breath and rambled. "I know it shouldn't bother me, he was about to kill Bofur and Fili. And I know it was more of a self defence kind of thing, even though he didn't attack me. Besides I understand that it's not such a big deal around here…I mean I remember the time when, you know, the men and you, well…"

I didn't look at them, staring at my hands as I was nervously wringing them.

"But he was going to … and I... But I didn't even face him, or he didn't face me." I frowned. "I stabbed him in the back. I literally stabbed him in the back. What does that make me? I'm supposed to heal people, not kill people. And I didn't even think about it, not even tried to stop him otherwise. I directly, purposely ran to stab him in the back…so many times too. And…and I just couldn't help it. One moment he was…and I was…and then…"

I wasn't making any sense.

I realized that.

But the words were just so tangled in my head.

Nori's hand tightened its grip on my knee. The sudden added pressure helped me clear my mind a bit. It was as if his touch anchored me in the present time, forbidding me to wallow in my memories. When I met his eyes I didn't see pity, or disgust or anything of the like. No. his grey eyes still shined with concern.

Dori cleared his throat lightly and caught my attention.

"It is something important. For everyone here and all the dwarves around, killing someone, a human, is serious. Nori cried and refused to speak for days after he killed for the first time a man. Some dwarves never do. Ori hasn't yet and I hope he would never have to. For my part, I remember refusing to eat for several days."

"We understand why you did it. Any of us would have done the same. Your reaction was perfectly normal, natural." Nori added softly and I knew he was trying to appease my mind.

"But you're not healers, and you don't kill people in the back. It is my duty to heal and save people. Not kill them savagely." I insisted.

Nori didn't answer. He frowned and averted his gaze.

"We're not healers that much is true. But as a healer your duty is toward your patient. As a friend your duty is toward your friend. As a ward here, your duty is toward the dwarves. Do you not realize you saved our prince? The heir to the throne?" Dori then asked, his voice even and calm.

Honestly? I hadn't thought of that.

Sure Fili was the heir, the first prince and Kili was the next in line to the throne. But I really hadn't seen them in that way during our journey. Maybe I had offended them in treating them just like I treated Bofur? Thinking back on it, I realized it was unlikely they'd been offended though.

Dori, Nori and Ori were waiting for a reaction. I know I had to go back to the topic. I sighed.

"It's not about duty or who I saved. Dori it's just…look where I come from killing someone, even if it's for all the apparently good reason, it's still punishable and in some country the punishment might be death."

"What? But what if the man was a criminal?" Ori couldn't help but ask with wide eyes.

"Let's say that someone comes and kills my family in front of my eyes, I am not allowed to take a gun…erm, a sword, and go after him to kill him."

"But, it's absurd! If not the family who will punish the criminal?" Dori was astounded.

"The police will catch him and he'll be judged by a tribunal. Well anyway…" I really didn't feel like trying to explain the judicial system in modern Europe. "Let's just say that for me killing someone is not something I ever prepared myself for."

I sighed as I saw how puzzled they were by our little discussion that they clearly didn't seem to understand that much. It was odd for me already to know about those differences. I could only imagine it was for them too.

The silence stretched for several more minutes before I could put some thoughts together. Frowning I tried to explain my reaction to them, not really understanding that they didn't need me to explain. They understood. As Dori had said, even for them it was something grave. Still, this explanation was as much for them as it was for me. Putting those thoughts into words, voicing them, was somehow helping.

So I talked.

"I have always kept in mind I wanted to heal people. I never even thought it would be possible for me to witness cold murder. Death, of course, it's sadly a part of any healer's life, but cold blooded murder is another thing altogether. And this time I was the one doing it. I just…I just can't believe it was me back there. I was so, so angry. I didn't think. I just…acted. This isn't me. I'm not…like this."

Even I could hear the defeat in my tone while my shoulders slumped. Still, I really appreciated the fact that they had all remained silent, letting me express as clearly as possible what I was feeling and not simply dismissing it as nothing. I could see they cared for me. It was so perceptible in Dori's worried frown, and with the way Ori would nervously play with the beads in his beard.

Nori was harder to read usually, but that evening I could see how concerned he was. He was now sitting on the small coffee table next to me, and he had taken hold of one of my hands, gently brushing his thumb over my knuckles. The regular, soft movement allowed me not to fall apart. It enabled me to talk and put some order in my thoughts but reminded me easily that I wasn't alone, that he was there for me.

My heart was swelling with all the affection I felt for those three dwarves.

After awhile in silence, Dori chose to speak once more.

"Amelia, we cannot tell you it's nothing major, because frankly it is. We cannot tell you that everything would be fine or the same, because it won't. We can only say that you won't find anyone here, and by here I mean in Thorin's Halls, who will judge you for what you did."

"This is something you have to come to term with, by yourself." Nori added sadly.

"You have to do it yourself, but just know that…you are not alone. Take your time, think about it, and grieve if you need to, but in the end you'll have to let it go." Dori said softly, he too sounded sad.

It sounded so simple and logical. Yet for me it seemed like an impossible task to accomplish.

"I'm not sure I'll be able to…" I lowered my gaze once more, ashamed.

"Nonsense." Dori immediately replied in a huff. "You're a strong girl. You'll get past this, I don't doubt it. Just take the time you need to put your thoughts and feelings in order."

After that I drank the rest of my chamomile tea, which was cold now. Dori and Nori were smoking while Ori read an old tome. I observed them for several minutes.

Their actions spoke volume to me, and somehow it seemed clearer and more effective than their words.

I was home and everything should be back to normal.

I stayed with them, enjoying the silence, the normality for awhile, but soon enough I just had to leave. I truly was grateful for their support and kindness. Yet, as much as I knew they wanted, they couldn't really help me deal with this. I had killed someone. I had to deal with it. Alone.

The only problem was…I had no idea how.

Tiredly I stood up and slowly walked to my room.

Lost in my thoughts I didn't see their gazes follow me.

It had been such a surreal week. Among all the things I thought would never happen in my life I had been certain that being a murderer wasn't going to happen to me. Well, on the other hand I would never have anticipated stumbling into another world. Still I had real trouble reconciling the person I once had been, and the one I was starting to become.

The changes at first had been rather light and barely noticeable. Well, they had been inconsequential; I had started to smile more, to trust people, in this case dwarves, more easily. I had started to laugh and joke, teasing my friends when they teased me. I had been happy with such changes; I was starting to become more confident in whom I was. My apprenticeship as a healer was going rather well and I had become acquainted with many different people, some of them I could call friends. And then there had been that splendid idea to go out of the Halls' protection.

The whole affair in Gorm when I had poisoned people willingly, actually plotting against them, had been an eye opener. I was becoming different. Was I unknowingly influenced by the dwarves' different morality? Was it this whole weird and dangerous world that influenced my mild character?

I had managed to put aside for a while the events related to the poisoning because I hadn't killed anyone. There hadn't been any long term harm done to anyone and everyone was safe and didn't know better.

And then around a week later I transformed into this berserker, letting rage overtake me.

I couldn't recognize myself, or who I thought I was, in those actions.

The door of my room closed softly behind me and I felt all my strength being suddenly drained. I took a staggering step on the side and let myself slid against the wall. I remained there for a few minutes, staring at nothing but the darkness, when the door creaked slowly opened. I craned my neck to find myself looking at Nori.

He stopped in his steps. He seemed surprised for a second as he looked at me, sitting on the floor. Then he simply entered and closed the door behind him before walking around in the dark. Absentmindedly I wondered how he could actually do anything in the darkness. But then, as a thief, he probably was used to it. I heard him rummaging through some stuffs before he lit a candle on my bedside table. He then turned back to face me and walked until he was at my feet. I wasn't surprised when he crouched in front of me.

"You'll be cold if you stay here."

I numbly looked at him and could only hum in answer. I saw him lift his right hand towards my face and he gently brushed his fingers on my cheek. My heart reacted weirdly at that but I ignored it once more. I'd have to remind myself to ask Oin for plants to help stabilize heart rates.

"Mizimul" He whispered his fingers still slightly stroking my cheekbone, "Come on, you should try and sleep."

I let him gently take my hands in his and he helped me up before guiding me to my bed.

"I don't want to sleep." I complained softly.

"You're sounding exactly like Ori did when he was younger."

I smiled at that but it didn't really last. I sat on my bed but refused to let Nori go. He was more stubborn than me though and before long I was lying on my bed with a thick blanket to keep me warm. Nori was about to leave when I jolted in a sitting position and caught his hand.

"Please, can you sleep with me tonight?" I blurted out.

Then my brain whispered to me that it might not be such a great idea to ask that quite so bluntly to a man while lying on a bed in a dimly lit room.

Nori sputtered some sounds that probably were supposed to be words but didn't quite get out of his mouth in the right way.

I couldn't see Nori's face properly but if he felt anything like me right now, his cheeks were probably red with embarrassment. Then I suddenly realized how long it had been since the last time I actually got embarrassed like this and it made me chuckle. The slight relief was much needed and I wasn't about to let it go so quickly.

Sensing somehow he was astounded, both by my demand and my laugh, I jokingly told him.

"I swear I won't ask you to braid my hair."

At first he tensed. But then it worked as I hoped it did. Hearing Nori's soft chuckle made me shiver and I squeezed the hand I was still holding in mine.

"Please." I insisted. "I just don't want to be alone right now and I know I won't be able to fall asleep."

Nori didn't move nor did he utter any sound. He seemed to be undecided about what to do and I murmured softly.

"Nori…I know if I close my eyes now, I'll see all of it in my sleep."

I didn't need to precise I would probably wake up screaming also, Nori knew just as well as me how terrible my nightmares could be.

"Alright" He finally whispered.

He then proceeded to sit at the other end of my bed. He was leaning against the wall and his feet were dangling on the side of the bed. I blinked at the sight.

"You're joking right?"

"I beg your pardon?" He asked much too politely.

"Nori please, can't you just, I don't know. Lie next to me?"

"It wouldn't be proper." He frowned and crossed his arms over his chest.

"What? You've held me in this very bed often enough." I replied.

Alright, that didn't sound quite proper. I blushed and could see his cheeks turn into a darker shade as well. He cleared his throat and avoided my eyes.

"It's not the same thing. It was to help you after you had nightmares."

"It's exactly the same." I whispered and to my utter shame my voice broke when I continued "The memories...I can't push them away Nori." My voice was barely audible as I murmured. "I'm scared."

I don't know if it were my words or the way I had sounded, completely defeated and frightened, but Nori's eyes snapped to mine. He observed me for all but a second and then quickly crawled to lie just next to me. The bed wasn't large but there was just enough space for him to fit between me and the wall. He let his head fall on the large, comfy pillow and he gently brought a hand up to caress my hair. He was still atop the blankets but I pushed them a bit lower to my waist so that I could turn to face him and put an arm around him.

His own arms seemed to find their place easily, sneaking around my waist and he brought me in one swift movement to his chest.

I was certain the position we were in right now would not be considered proper by Dori but I truly didn't care. I was lying on Nori's chest and his arms were holding my waist and back tightly. My head rested once more just below his beard and I put my hands on each of his shoulders.

I let a shaky breath out and closed my eyes. I moved my head a bit and it was now lying under Nori's chin, on his chest. I could hear his strong, relatively quick, heartbeat. I didn't know whether he did it on purpose or not, but I could feel one of his hands apparently absentmindedly brush random figures on my back.

I sighed contentedly and closed my eyes.

After awhile spent like this, I half opened my eyes and realized the dim light was actually dimmer now. The candle was clearly burning so low that I could barely see. I wasn't uncomfortable at all though. Quite the contrary actually, and slowly, very slowly I drifted into sleep.

* * *

><p>Sometime later, it was Nori's voice that finally broke the terrifying nightmare I had.<p>

"Khul, Mizimul, it's just a dream…"

His soft rumble murmured in my ears as his arms encircled me, preventing me from trashing around, managed to wake me. I blinked several times and I felt one of Nori's hands leave my back to brush the tears away. I choked a bit and looked at him, realizing only then that the candle was still lit. I searched his eyes. His grey eyes that so often observed me were now filled with worry. I felt my lower lip tremble. I was so weak. I needed him so much and only seemed to bring him worry.

His hand was still on my cheek when I buried my face in his chest.

He held me tightly, humming a soothing tune until I calmed down.

After long minutes had passed, I stammered pitifully.

"It was really awful Nori. I was back in that shed, but this time I was too late. Bofur and Fili were…and it wasn't the same. I didn't feel the rage. I remember I somehow found the man who had... He was…bound, helpless. And then I saw myself stab him, torture him really. He yelled. He yelled so loudly and I was…I was laughing and I felt like I was so happy…I'm a monster. Nothing but a monster." I was almost sobbing now.

Nori started then to caress my hair before whispering some words in Khuzdul. He sounded weird though so I tore myself from him, just enough so that I could crane my neck and look at his face. His grey eyes looked right back at me. Hurt and concern was what I could see. Something else. There was something else too. It took my breath away to look at his eyes.

I had to blink and force my gaze away.

"Mizimul, you're not a monster."

I felt a few tears blur my vision once more and roll down my cheeks. Just like he had done a few minutes ago, Nori grazed my skin with his knuckles, effectively brushing them away.

"You know you're not a monster, you're not evil. I've seen many evil creatures and you're nothing like them."

"I don't feel…I don't feel evil, but I feel like something's wrong. It's not…I'm not supposed to be like this."

He took some time to answer, clearly pondering on his words.

"It's…well, killing a human being is going to change something in you. It changes you. But it doesn't change who or what you are. It certainly doesn't change what made you before. It only adds one more detail."

I tried to smile softly but it might have come out more as a grimace of some sort.

"You sound a bit…cheesy, you know?"

I glanced at his face. He chose that moment to wink at me. It warmed my heart and he didn't say anything while I shifted a bit. Suddenly nervous I sat, looking at my hands that were now resting on my thighs. I felt him shuffle next to me until he was sitting too, his back against the wall. I knew he was observing me and my reaction, patiently waiting for me to talk. I swallowed thickly and refused to look at Nori before speaking.

"My hands…with these hands I poisoned people. I know now it wasn't such an important thing. But then I took a life in the worst, most gruesome way I can imagine. I killed someone with these hands. They were supposed to heal, to stitch and operate. How can I be a healer still? My hands are tainted. I'm not suitable…"

I looked up and my gaze was immediately locked to Nori's.

Ever so slowly, without breaking contact between our eyes, he kindly took my hands in his as he leant towards me. My heart skipped a beat when I felt his lips press soft and gentle kisses on my knuckles. His breath tickled my skin. My own breath was caught in my throat.

It took the sound of his deep voice to break me out of my numb daze.

"You are the most suitable person I know. It's natural to feel the way you do right now. Just…give it time. Give yourself some time."

I couldn't resist the urge to be in his arms at that moment and he let me lean against him. I put my left arm around his waist and my right hand on his chest. Automatically one of his arms encircled my waist too while his other hand held mine. Tears rolled on my cheeks while he started to hum a low tune. He rubbed my back and let go of my hand. He brushed away the hairs that were stuck to my face by the tears before he once more kindly brushed the tears away.

Apparently I couldn't stop crying that night.

Surprisingly, I felt better quite quickly. I remained silent for awhile, savouring this moment that belonged to just the two of us, noting absentmindedly that I really liked how he lightly brushed his fingers on my cheekbones.

My mind drifted to another thought that I just couldn't push away. It started to nag at me and I couldn't fight against it. I had to ask Nori.

"Nori, do you…" I bit my lip and hesitated. "Do you think my actions were, you know, repulsive."

I knew it was a stupid question. Still, I had to ask it.

Immediately, his arm tightened really strongly around me and he growled his answer.

"Mizimul, I'll personally hurt anyone, anyone, who'd say that."

I gasped at the fierceness and controlled anger in his voice. He forced me to crane my neck and look in his eyes. I could barely see him anymore in the dying light of the candle. He looked at me sternly, his face serious but once our gazes locked I saw him relax slightly. He let the hand that had been on my cheek previously fall to his lap. Meanwhile his grey eyes hadn't left my green ones.

He was the one who looked away first this time and then he whispered to me that I should try to sleep again. After some more pleading on my part, he agreed to lie next to me once more. After all I had just had a nightmare and was still shaken by it, even though Nori had managed to calm me.

We remained silent in the near darkness and it felt slightly awkward to lie next to Nori but with a space between us.

After some time, I stupidly wondered whether he was asleep or not.

I slowly rose a bit, arching my back to look at his face. His eyes were closed but, either because I had woken him by shifting or because he simply wasn't asleep, he opened his right eye and looked questioningly at me.

I blurted the first question that passed through my mind. I truly didn't care much, I simply wanted to talk with Nori and almost whatever topic would have been fine.

"Do you have to redo your braids every day?"

He looked slightly surprised until a slow, lazy smirk graced his features. He snorted before answering teasingly.

"Wouldn't you like to know?"

I smiled at his antics. Shook my head slightly and playfully hit his chest. He winced, though I knew perfectly well I couldn't have hurt him with that light slap.

"Come on, don't tell me it's another huge secret. How often do dwarves braid their hairs? It can't be such important information that I have to ask Thorin about it."

He chuckled at that before brushing one of his fingers against my temple.

"You just called him Thorin, I hope you realize that." He said, smirking cheekily.

I rolled my eyes and naturally, without even thinking about it, crossed my arms on his chest, resting my chin on them. Nori just as naturally put his right arm around my waist and was now using the other to prop his head in a position where he wouldn't need to crane his neck to look at me.

"Well…I did spend some time with his nephews. Surely it allows me a slip once in awhile." I lightly said.

"It'd be closer to the truth to say you saved his nephew's life."

"I couldn't have done anything without Kili you know." I answered blushing.

"You did fight trained mercenaries for his nephews' sake and that's quite an important gesture for us dwarves. You know that." He calmly replied though I could feel him tense a bit as he spoke of the men.

"How could you possibly know they were trained mercenaries?" I asked frowning a bit.

"That's what the man, Hector, told him."

"Thorin allowed you in his council room when he talked to Hector?" I was truly surprised, Thorin did seem to appreciate Nori but there was a certain edge to it, as if he didn't fully trust him.

"I…have my ways."

"You have your ways? What does that even mean?"

He didn't answer but his smirk grew sneakier and I couldn't help but be entirely certain he had somehow found a way to listen to everything. I was sure he could spy on the King's council room.

"You sly little dwarf." I breathed out with a smirk of my own.

"If you don't mind, I'd rather be called clever and stealthy. And please, avoid using 'little' when talking about me."

I chuckled, it felt so right being here, joking with Nori. Somehow his presence next to me was enough to keep my worries at bay. It even allowed me to joke about events that would otherwise make me cringe at their mere thought.

"Does Thorin know you have a way to spy on his council room?" I asked half serious and half teasing.

"Why would I want to spy on him?" He replied evenly.

"You tell me."

He sighed deeply and looked into my eyes, suddenly very serious, as if to convince me of his honesty.

"I do not spy on Thorin. I never did and never will. But that day was different. I knew the man had come from Gorm, where you went, and he had looked alarmed. The lad almost barrelled into our halls like a bull. I had to…well, anyway I was lucky to find a way to…listen, and I will tell Thorin about it tomorrow."

I nodded simply and we remained silent for a while more before I chuckled and said.

"You still didn't answer." I chastised playfully.

He didn't answer, simply humming.

"How often do you have to redo your braids and starfish hairdo?"

I slowly lifted my hand and poked at his hair, wondering how he made it stay that way, I had seldom seen it without it. Now that I thought about it actually, the only time I had seen Nori without his starfish on the head was when he had been wounded, many months ago.

Nori seemed to have only picked one word out of my whole question.

"Starfish?" He repeated arching an eyebrow.

"Starfish. You know…those weird star shaped fishes. A starfish."

"Oy."

He grinned, obviously not upset or offended by my little nickname for him. I chuckled and slapped his finger when he poked my shoulder playfully.

I didn't know how or why it felt so nice being here, joking childishly with Nori, but it did. It wasn't only the fact that I felt safe with him. No, it wasn't just that. There was something else.

When I was with Ori, I felt as if he was the brother I had never had. We talked and talked endlessly together, both immensely curious and both simply happy to share time. Ori would still pick out his notebook and write whatever I would explain about my world, from religion to mechanic, from music's stars to technology. Anything was interesting for him. Still, more than once he had shown me that he wasn't a child or a young adult like I was. That he hadn't been either of those in awhile. After all, Ori was a dwarf. An adult dwarf.

My relation with Dori was different. Dori wasn't a brother. He was like a friend, a godfather, an uncle. I might one day even go as far as saying he could be here, what my uncle had been in my world, a third father of sort. Dori was the strong presence in the background, the one I knew I could go to. He was there to listen whenever I needed to and was wise enough to let me choose my path. Though he had to battle against his protective instincts most of the time.

Nori on the other hand…

Nori was something else. He was there, always. Silent and strong. Fierce and kind.

Nori was not the one I would go to if something was wrong, Nori knew when something was wrong. I still cringed when I thought of that awful period when we didn't talk to each others. Strangely and thankfully, we hadn't gone through such a quarrel since then. Even with all this mess that had occurred recently, he hadn't been angry at me and I was immensely glad about it.

In the end nothing mattered and he was one of the three dwarves I trusted most and held dearest and closest to my heart. In the relative short time I had been here, they had managed to become something akin to family. Even Nori was a part of it, though I couldn't quite place him in any given role.

Nori was the one who would remain silent until he'd make some cheeky comment and chuckle softly. He was the one observing everyone around and quickly grabbing what he wanted from the others' plates. He was the sneaky thief who would hide in the shadows and observe what was happening around. He would pop out of nowhere and smirk, and wink and just be Nori.

I didn't understand him. I really didn't. But in a strange way I didn't seem to need to. I couldn't understand why but it didn't bother me. Nori was Nori. And that was more than enough for me.

We both stayed silent, still holding each other as if it was the most natural thing to do, and maybe it was. I knew perfectly well that Nori hadn't answered my questions but I didn't mind. I closed my eyes, relishing in the feeling of his warm hand brushing lightly on my back. I snuggled a bit closer to him. And he let me. There was no more light and the room was swallowed by complete darkness.

I wasn't afraid.

My head rested on Nori's chest. My arms held his sides. His strong arms encircled my waist and I felt safe. I was safe.

Soon enough I was lulled to sleep by the sound of his breath and heart beat.

Sleep couldn't evade me any longer and I was glad.

I was fine.

* * *

><p>My eyes fluttered open quite slowly. My mind was still clouded by sleep and the remnants of a dream that eluded me now. I tightened my hold on the warm body lying just next to me and sighed contentedly. Then my eyes snapped opened to see a well known braided beard that tickled my nose.<p>

The events of the previous day rushed through my head and I blushed.

Then I realized what position I was currently in.

Oh dear.

* * *

><p><strong>AN: Thanks a lot to all the wonderful reviewers and the new followers! **

**Mary: Thanks :) it's very nice of you to say that. I hope this chapter didn't disappoint.**

**Lilly: I know I made Thorin a bit cruel...but well, he can be rather rude and harsh. I hope there was enough care from Nori in this chapter XD**

**And thanks to the nameless guest who reviewed too ;) it's very nice of you.**

**Sooooo I hope you all enjoyed this chapter! After that, who can complain about a lack of Nori? ;) I'm sorry if some of you felt it was too fluffy but well...what can I say, I wanted some more fluff, so that chapter came up. **I really hope this chapter didn't disappoint anyone! ****

**I know it's shorter than the previous chapters but I guess you understand why I wanted to cut it here too ^^ **

**For those of you who are curious about the mercenaries...I can only say you'll have answers, here and there in the next chapter and in later ones (as usual).**

**I'll try to update soon, but honestly I don't think I'll be able to update before Thursday. I have a busy week coming and I'm not sure I'll have the time to edit next chapter. **

**Thanks everyone for your support!**


	24. A Healer's Doubt

**Everything belongs to JRR Tolkien except for my OC and the plot**

* * *

><p>Well, apparently both Nori and I had moved during our sleeps.<p>

Yep. That we had.

I was no longer sleeping on his chest. Though I wasn't sure whether this was better or worse. Well, it wasn't anything bad per se, just a bit embarrassing. I wasn't used to wake up in someone's arms.

We were now facing each other and we had managed somehow to entangle the both of us in the thick blanket. Had we rolled together in it? My legs were completely tangled with his and, even though it wasn't uncomfortable, I still felt a bit nervous at finding that one of my legs was between his. His strong arms imprisoned me against his chest and I could feel it rise and fall in time with his breath. His chin was just atop my head, his beard was probably half disappearing in my hair.

What did surprise me most though was the way my fists were clenched.

I was clinging onto him quite tightly too, as if I didn't want him to go away in my sleep. One of my hands was between us, clutching the tunic on his chest, while the other had glided its way behind his back. My fingers there were tangled in his mane of hair and I couldn't help but think about how soft and long it was.

It really wasn't the moment to ponder on that though.

Still, I couldn't help it. For a second I closed my eyes and forgot about everything.

I lightly brushed my nose against his chest. My mind was blank. I could only think about how I felt at that very instant. However strange this position was, it still felt somehow right.

I felt safe.

But then I blinked and reality crashed back. I didn't know exactly what would happen when Nori would awake, but I was quite sure he wouldn't feel comfortable with our position. And I bet if Dori was to enter the room now, he'd have a heart attack from the sight. We were quite…tangled after all. I couldn't even move my legs, the blanket and sheet were so tight around us that they were glued to Nori's.

At that realization I did feel slightly awkward.

I had never been in such a situation and had no idea what to do. Logic though told me I should simply roll away from him…

Or at least try.

I started by letting go of his hair and let my hand lightly skim along his spine to his waist. I unclenched my other fist and let my hand lay flat on his chest. My eyes opened wide at the feel of his warm skin under my fingers. Apparently I had clutched his tunic so tightly that I had managed to open it in my sleep.

I couldn't stop the blush that burnt my cheeks.

I felt his heart beat under my palm. It was steady, slow. It brought me some peace. I used it to focus on something other than the warmth in my cheeks.

Cautiously I slid my other hand from his waist to his chest and started to shift away.

I startled slightly when I heard Nori mumble something in his sleep. I couldn't stop the soft squeak that escaped my lips though when his arms tightened their hold on me and brought me flat against him.

Then to my utter horror, I felt Nori shift and I knew he was about to wake up.

Well, there was nothing to do about it now.

I could feel him shift some more before one of his hands slowly started to brush against my back and slid in my messy hair. I heard him mumble something as he buried his face in my hair too. I could feel his lips graze my skin and it sent tingles all over my body. They moved slightly as he muttered something, bringing me impossibly closer at the same time. My heart skipped a beat. Several actually as the hand still on my back started to caress it, sending shivers up my spine.

And then he suddenly froze.

Yep. He was awake.

I couldn't help but smile when I felt him try to untangle his hand from my hair, obviously being cautious not to wake me. I decided that maybe making light of the situation would help us both forget about our embarrassment.

"Nori?" I simply said.

I immediately wished I didn't though. As soon as I had uttered his name, Nori jolted, almost jumping away from me. Doing this though he only managed to tear a few of my hairs away from my scalp, which made me yelp, and tangled ourselves some more in the devilish blanket.

"Mahal!" He exclaimed while jerking away from me as if I was infested with the plague.

"Oy! Careful, I'm almost bald now!" I complained loudly while rubbing at my scalp.

I chanced a glimpse at Nori, he was redder than ever and currently busy with freeing his legs from the cover. He didn't look at me though and I had a feeling it wasn't a good sign. As he was finally able to move, I sensed he was about to bolt for the door and I just knew it wouldn't be good to let him leave like that. My chest tightened.

I quickly grabbed his wrist and yanked on it, forcing Nori to sit back on the bed.

"Let me go Amelia." He immediately said, looking anywhere but at me.

"Nori" I sighed. "It's no big de…"

"Here it is." He snapped, interrupting me.

"Seriously?" I groaned. "Nori, I don't care what you think. I needed you here last night. I hadn't slept peacefully in days. Days Nori! Granted, most of that time I was on the run but still. It matters more to me that I could sleep without nightmares than any talk about what his proper could."

Nori didn't say anything, simply looking at the door and I sighed, annoyed.

"Fine. You think that helping me is something shameful? What do you believe? That it's not honourable or something stupid like that?"

"Amelia it's…" He started to answer harshly but I didn't let him finish.

"In my eyes you didn't do more than what a friend would do for someone he cared for. You always say you don't want me to hurt, but I do Nori. It hurts like hell to even think about what happened. You gave me respite for one night. One night. That's how I see it, and I'm immensely thankful for that."

My voice had become a whisper at the end of my little speech and I released his wrist. Nori didn't leave though and we stayed in the silent room for several minutes before he spoke. He cleared his voice first and then whispered softly.

"I'm glad I helped you, but you have to understand…for an unmarried man and woman to share a bed like we did is…" He seemed to hesitate then. "It's just really frowned upon in our society. Especially for the woman."

No kidding? Women should be faithful and remain virgins before their wedding and men should not? How unoriginal. I rolled my eyes but listened to what Nori had to say.

"If it were to be known that I spent the night with you." He paused then. "No proper suitor would court you if they knew you had spent a night with a man. Especially a man like me." He muttered those last words almost inaudibly.

I could have laughed. I really could. What did he think? That I had a queue of suitors dying to ask for my hand in marriage? That I waited for them? And what about that last part? It was just idiotic to say something like that. Nori was a good dwarf. I knew it; surely I wasn't the only one. Seriously the silliness of this dwarf was astounding sometimes. Besides, I couldn't believe that someone who would love me wouldn't trust me and truly, nothing had happened. Such ways of thinking were so archaic…oh right, middle age era. Damn. Why couldn't I end up in some futuristic world?

"Nori" I said to end this discussion. "I do not plan on getting married. You can't just ignore me because of something that's unlikely to ever happen. I don't want to quarrel with you on that. Nothing happened except for you supporting me and that's final."

My words didn't seem to appease him as much as I had planned so I chose to resort to joking. It usually woke Nori from his angry and stubborn daze.

"Besides, what dwarf would like to marry a beardless woman like me?" I chuckled softly.

At that, Nori's gaze turned to look at me. For the first time in a long while I couldn't read anything on his face or in his eyes. He was entirely expressionless, blank, his eyes veiled. That surprised me. I stared at him questioningly when he sighed and finally decided to answer.

"Fine. But it won't happen again."

I stared back at him, looking straight in his eyes and saw how serious he was about this.

"Alright." I finally relented unhappily.

We remained awkwardly silent until he stood, walked to the door and simply asked.

"Can I leave now?"

I felt a slight pang of hurt at his emotionless tone and silly question, but I didn't let it show. I slowly stood up too while Nori didn't move. I was still wearing my rumpled clothes but I didn't care. I made my way toward Nori who was like frozen. Arriving at the door I paused for a second and tilted my head on one side.

Then I quickly leant forward and kissed Nori on the cheek, just above where his beard started. He jolted, eyes wide, and before he had the time to reply or react, I whacked the back of his head.

"The first was to show my appreciation for your help. The second, I hope, brought some sense in your head."

I snorted at seeing Nori completely flabbergasted, staring at me with wide eyes, mouth agape and rosy cheeks. It was a funny and cute sight. I didn't wait for him to gather back his wits and just turned toward my trunk, looking for the dress I would wear that day while he quickly got out. My heart was beating a bit quicker than usual, which surprised me, but I didn't really mind. The feeling that accompanied this rapid heartbeat was unusual but pleasant. Really pleasant, even though I had no idea what to name it and truly didn't feel like thinking about it now.

At that instant I just wanted to relish in it. Thinking about feelings could wait. I would have to sort them out soon, but not this morning, not now.

Shaking my head at my own silliness I crouched near the wooden trunk. I wanted nothing more than to take a long, warm bath but I knew I would have to wait until that afternoon at least, when they would light the heaters in the bathrooms. I was hungry and realistic. Now was not the time to joke around with Nori, nor was the time to sleep in hot and bubbly water…now was the time to face the world and the consequences of my recent actions.

I was wondering whether I should use the cold water in the small basin in my room to at least freshen up a bit when someone knocked lightly at my door.

"Amee?" I heard Ori's uncertain voice.

"Yes? What is it?"

I opened the door, surprised to see him holding a rather large cauldron. I looked at the cauldron and then at Ori whose cheeks were a bit more rosy than usual.

"I, that is, we thought you might want some warm water to…wash a bit." He blabbered and I smiled.

"Are you telling me that I stink Ori?" I teased him while leaning slightly on the door.

"What? No! It's just you're a girl and girls like to be clean and we thought that you're a girl too..."

"Ori stop." I laughed hoping to make him breathe. "I was just joking. It's actually really nice and thoughtful. Thank you a lot."

The both of us managed to pour the hot water in the basin where it mixed with the cold one. After Ori left me, I was able to 'clean' and was once more immensely grateful for the dwarves' thoughtfulness. I sighed contentedly when I felt the warm, and now soapy, water wash away a bit of the dirt and sweat of the past week. Using a wet cloth was far from the comfort a true bath would provide, but it was still damn good.

Then after putting some fresh and clean clothes on, I walked toward the kitchen, cringing when I heard loud voices. There clearly was an argument taking place around the table. Instead of barging in like I often did, I chose to stay in the shadows of the corridor, hidden by the door, as I listened to what was happening.

It sounded like a repeat of the previous yelling match they had a week or so ago. A shiver ran down my spine, I hoped the King wouldn't try and send me away once more to Gorm. This time I didn't care about my oath or the consequences, I wouldn't go. No discussion.

"You saw how upset she was!" Ori's voice said angrily.

"What you're asking of her is just plain cruel. Let her rest today at least!" Dori exclaimed.

"I want to talk to her Dori, not send her back. I want to hear from her too what happened…" The King sounded extremely exasperated.

"You're not sending her anywhere anymore!" Nori growled.

"What I order her or what she decides to do doesn't concern you Nori." The King snarled back.

"She is my ward! Of course I and my brothers are concerned by her well-being." Dori said coldly and I knew he was trying to contain his anger.

"You already heard Bofur's, Fili's, and Kili's versions. Why do you need to hear hers now?" Wow, Nori sounded even worse.

"Because…Kili told me she went in town alone after the others got captured. She might know more about…" The King seemed to talk to children at that moment.

"She what?!" Three voices yelled in perfect harmony.

I closed my eyes, cursing both Kili and the King. Now I had the dreading feeling I'll get quite an earful very soon. Damn the dwarves and their over protectiveness.

I stepped in the kitchen before any more shouts could be heard and tried to sound joyous as I greeted everyone. I did freeze for a second though when I realized that there were far more people around the table than I had thought. I had only heard the brothers' and the King's voices and I had assumed that he was the only one visiting the three brothers. I had been wrong.

Completely silent but still there, eating their breakfast, were Oin, Dís, Gloin, Balin, Dwalin and Bofur. I blinked several time while they all observed me, waiting for something. I guessed that after my little stunt in Dwalin's arms, it was quite natural for them to believe I would shatter to the ground at the littlest breeze.

Well I didn't want to.

My pain was my own and I felt already slightly ashamed to have let so many dwarves witness my breaking down. I liked them all, but there was no arguing with the fact that I truly felt completely comfortable and at ease with the three brothers only.

I swallowed and forced a cheery smile on my lips.

"Hello Dori, Nori, Ori." I said to each of them.

I walked toward Dori and hugged him quickly whispering 'Thanks for the water' in his ear. He patted my back and smiled at me. I was glad I had managed to cool down a bit of his anger. It wouldn't do to have the dwarves yell at their King for too long, I didn't think he appreciated it.

My eyes took a look around the table while Ori served a huge portion of food on an empty plate next to him and I guessed it would be mine.

The King was here, sitting at one end of the table, and his face was set in an even grimmer frown than ever. Next to him, at his right Gloin and Dwalin looked ready to kill someone; their frowns were matching that of the king. The three of them seemed ready for battle and it scared me a little.

Sitting next to the warriors, Oin and Dís were eating peacefully, though they would from time to time send a glare in the King's direction. Bofur was sitting with them and I wondered whether he was trying to disappear under his hat because I had never seen him holding his head so low. Balin was on the King's left, losing his frown just for the time he needed to smile warmly at me.

Dori and Nori were standing just behind their brother, and I was now next to them. There was enough space next to Ori for the four of us to sit comfortably.

But at the moment I wasn't really thinking about comfort. The silence was starting to unnerve me greatly and I really didn't wish to be reminded of all the negative feelings I had been feeling for days now. The brothers, Nori mostly, had managed to calm me and had helped me greatly. I was now in a relaxed state, well as relaxed as anyone could be after having killed someone.

I shook my head, pushing such thoughts away and then greeted everyone, hugging the dwarves closest to me. That meant everyone except Dwalin, Gloin and the King. I wouldn't dare hug a King. But I didn't think twice about sharing a long hug with Dís who had stood up at my approach and another longer one with Balin.

"Balin. Oh, I'm so happy you're alright." I breathed out.

"I'm glad you came back unharmed too, deary." He said while patting my back. "But why wouldn't I be alright?"

I blushed and heard Dwalin cough loudly behind me. Stepping back, I realized that Balin and the three brothers were looking at me curiously. Bofur, that damned cheery dwarf, started to laugh loudly.

"Well" He said smiling. "The lass thought Balin was dead when Dwalin told her he was in a right state thanks to her. She didn't take it well, utterly broken. Think about how my brother reacts if he's hungry and we steal his food…that's about how much she panicked."

I couldn't believe I'd ever blush more than what I did at that time. My face was burning with embarrassment while Dwalin just shrugged. Balin, the sweet man he was just patted my cheek before I complained.

"For god's sake Bofur, can't you just shut it for once?"

"Nah…you'd be bored without my charm." He replied with a lazy smile.

"I don't think so…" I retorted through gritted teeth.

"Oh lass, you're breaking my lil' heart." I rolled my eyes when he clutched his tunic above said heart.

"Deal with it." I deadpanned.

"I think I'll manage, for your sake only, I know you'd miss me terribly."

"I'm really glad you're alright." I told Balin, choosing to ignore Bofur for the time being.

"Well, well, I'm perfectly fine deary, don't worry. This just proves I'm still the brighter of the two brothers. I don't go around scaring everyone." Balin sweetly replied.

"Shorter you mean." Dwalin snorted.

I took a quick glance at the King and immediately noticed that he didn't really seem to appreciate our silly banter. I quickly shut it and sat between Nori and Ori while Dori brought me some warm tea and sat on Nori's other side. We all remained silent for awhile and I was about to start eating a bit when the King broke the silence and talk to me.

"You saved my nephew's life and greatly helped the other. It isn't something to take lightly. I owe…"

"With all due respect, Sire, you don't owe me anything. I didn't do it for you." I could have bit my tongue off.

My eyes widened as I stared at my cup of chamomile. The room was silent and I held my breath. Why had I interrupted him? How could I talk like this to him? Seeing as the silence lingered, I glimpsed at the King, expecting to see him furious at my disrespectful behaviour. The shock I received almost made me startle.

How could a King look pleased when a little girl would say something like that in his face? This man was a real mystery to me. He was incomprehensible and he behaved in no regular or logical patterns, at least none that I understood. I personally was astonished and embarrassed at my own lack of decorum. Anxiety apparently made me stupid.

"I'm sorry…" I apologized lamely but he apparently didn't care about it.

Waving a hand to stop my apology he chose to change topics instead, indicating clearly that the matter of thanks and apologies was closed definitively.

"I wanted to speak with you about the events. If that's alright with you of course…"

This tone was so different than the one he had used when I had left for the second time that it made me frown. He had sounded rather angry and rude last time, now he seemed almost…apologetic. He wasn't exasperated either, as he had been while talking with the brothers. No he was polite and almost kind.

After hearing his question, I took a quick glimpse toward Dori, Nori and Ori, and felt a cold shiver ran down my spine. The looks on their faces clearly indicated that they had just remembered what the King had said just before I entered the room.

Ori looked simply concerned, whereas Dori was clearly disapproving of whatever might have lead me to go back into the town on my own. I gulped when I turned to face Nori. He looked deadly. I swallowed thickly and attempted a sweet smile at him. His glare told me I had better have a damn good reason to put myself in danger willingly.

"If that's alright with you, Thorin, we'd like to hear it as well." Dori calmly said, though his eyes didn't lie, he wasn't happy at all.

"Well, I think we'd all like to hear about that." Balin confirmed while looking at me rather sternly, though he was calm.

At the same time, Bofur seemed to shrink a bit on his seat, his earlier smile completely forgotten. It didn't take me long to realize that Nori was glaring at him. At the moment though, I was more worried by all the stern looks I was getting. Somehow I didn't think the dwarves would approve the plan that Kili and I had concocted while we tried to find out where the others where.

To my horror, the King nodded, agreeing just like this to send me to my death.

Damn him. Damn the dwarves. Damn their protectiveness.

Was I repeating myself?

Anyway I took my time eating, while the dwarves discussed various unrelated topics. Nori's gaze though clearly displayed he knew I was trying to play for time.

Had I not been in a room with so many dwarves around, I'd have moaned and whimpered at my sudden lack of luck.

Seeing as I had stopped eating, Nori devilishly smirked and spoke in an overly sweet tone. Oh dear, he was pissed. Really pissed…

"So, would you care to explain why you decided to go back in that town after knowing Fili and Bofur were captured."

"Because, we didn't know whether they had been captured or not." I blurted out nervously without thinking.

I shouldn't have put it quite like this; I realized it the second Nori's gaze turned from angered to furious.

"You're saying you went there, knowing that these people might have killed Bofur and Fili? You went there knowing they might kill you on sight?!" Balin seemed stunned.

Hem…How to say yes, without actually saying it?

Nori was fuming; I could swear that there was actual smoke leaving his ears. Dori looked ill and Ori was extremely pale. Balin was eyeing me with huge eyes while Oin shook his head disapprovingly. Dís' face was carefully neutral and I wasn't sure whether she would approve of my actions or not. Dwalin and Gloin were both looking at me sternly, clearly not agreeing with the idea to have a woman endangering herself so stupidly, and Bofur shrank some more. The only one who was looking remotely normal was the King, and even he was glaring at me in obvious anger.

I looked at the ceiling, as if it held all the answers, trying to escape from their gazes. The silence in the room was simply suffocating.

"See Nori, that's exactly why I want to hear her." The King said sternly.

I sighed loudly. How was it possible that both Kili and I forgot about the others' reactions? It should have been obvious that they wouldn't like it. Well, if I were honest, I would admit that Kili had hated that plan and had tried to change my mind about it numerous times. Remembering his words I wondered for a second whether Nori would indeed kill him. But I was soon obliged to focus on the matter at hand. Looking at the angry faces around I swallowed thickly the lump that was forming in my throat before talking.

"I can explain…" I attempted rather weakly.

"Go on." The King said.

And thus I started to retell our tale.

* * *

><p>The past hour had been tough. I had to recall everything that happened and the dwarves had listened intently. Well, almost everything. I hadn't said a word about Kili teaching me Iglishmêk, he had almost begged me not to divulge this information to anyone. No one had stopped me to ask questions and I had thus spoken almost non-stop for a full hour. I had just finished talking when I saw them all exchange glances before their eyes locked onto me once more.<p>

"This was an incredibly dangerous plan Amelia." Balin was the first to talk and though his voice was soft, I knew he wasn't happy, at all.

"It was stupid of you to endanger yourself like this, lass." Gloin added.

"Stupid? It was suicidal." Dwalin snorted, eating a piece of bread.

I looked at Nori who refused to look back at me and Dori who was clearly unhappy.

"We really had no other choices at the time." I tried to amend but it didn't convince any of them.

"I'll deal with Kili accordingly." The King then said, ignoring completely my comment.

Dori nodded and the other dwarves remained silent. I looked at Dís for guidance but her face was still totally blank. I frowned. What did he mean by 'deal with Kili'? I remembered the young dwarf's comments once more and I suddenly felt angry too.

"You will do nothing." I said coldly glaring at my empty plate.

I had no idea where that had come from. Truly I didn't know how I could talk like this to the King without feeling fear at his reaction. The dwarves looked at me, all surprised and shocked by my reaction and the tone of my voice.

"What did you just say?" The King asked me emotionlessly.

"I said, you will not punish Kili in any way."

"He was responsible of your protection. He is a dwarf, he should know better than to send a woman into danger."

"Right. With all due respect, you weren't there. What would you have done? Run back here for backup? That would have been a stupid loss of time. Send Kili in that town? Great idea, if you don't mind both your nephew being kidnapped and killed. What other option did we have?"

"You should have waited…" Gloin stubbornly muttered.

"Oh, that would have been such a good idea." I said sarcastically. "Bofur, can you remind me how well you were treated by those mercenaries? I'm sure they provided food, comfortable lodging, and probably some nice entertainment too."

"Enough girl." The King growled. "The fact that your presence in the village was useless was proved. You went there for nothing, endangered yourself for nothing. Had you and Kili simply taken the time to analyze the situation instead of acting recklessly like stupid children, you wouldn't have needed to go in that town and put your life at risk."

I felt myself blush terribly at his rant. Of course he was right. After all the two dwarves had been held prisoners far from town, had we known this, we wouldn't have tried to find information in the village. Still, I didn't appreciate being treated like a child and berated like some silly girl. Suddenly my shame and anger made my thoughts shift. A few weeks ago I had willingly poisoned people for the dwarves. Several days ago I had killed a man for the dwarves. I wasn't proud of this, far from it, but I had still done the deed. I had survived both encounters and had proven to everyone that I was useful and resourceful. They had absolutely no right to treat me like this.

"Stop. Calling. Me. Girl." I enunciated angrily as I stood up slowly.

They all looked at me with various degrees of bewilderment showing on their faces. Even the King's eyes reflected his surprise at my sudden anger.

"I poisoned people for you. I killed a man for you. I'm not a child!" I shouted those last words angrily.

Images of the few times I had let my anger burst out sped through my mind. I could see myself in the small dingy house in Gorm, breaking and throwing things around. I could see the knife plunging in the man's back. Nausea menaced to distract me but I managed thanks to some miracle to settle my upset stomach. I simply stood and banged my closed fist on the table, rage masking the pain that shot through my arms. I saw some of them startle a bit though I could tell that Dís, Nori, Balin and Dori where observing me intently and strangely calmly for Dís at least.

"It is my life. If I want to risk it you have no right to say anything. It is way too easy for you all to say what we should have done once we're all safely back here." I managed to talk calmly, evenly now. "If you want to comment, fine, do it. You have experience that I don't, and I welcome your advises. But I won't listen to you berate us as if we're stupid children. Our actions are proof enough that we're not. Unless you believe that saving Bofur and Fili was a mistake. In that case, be my guest, kill them now."

At that I took the knife I had used for breakfast and handed it, handle first, in the King's direction. No one spoke. They all looked at me strangely but none of them spoke at that moment until Dís cleared her throat and decided to add her voice in the debate.

"My dear brother, once more you see how wrong you all are to treat women like you do."

"Dís, don't start." The King groaned.

"Thorin, we are fine with being protected, but you have to admit that we are not necessarily helpless or useless. As Amelia said, she did in the past month save quite a large number of your warriors, and she proved her strength. She has never been trained, she isn't used to this world, and yet she has proved to you how useful and resourceful she is. She proved herself. She made no mistakes in Gorm."

"Dís, you know that's not the point."

"Actually I think Dís is right." Balin said, clearing his throat and shocking everyone. "We all assume that Amelia endangered herself needlessly, but in all truth, Kili and her didn't have much room to act. Their deduction that Fili and Bofur were being held in the cellar was sound. Their plan was clearly risky, but even then, the fact that Kili remained hidden did provide them some security. As far as I can tell, had Amelia not been safe, but instead locked in the cellar too, Kili would have tried and probably managed to save her and the others."

"And what if she had been killed on sight?" Dwalin grunted.

Then the dwarves all started to talk together, arguing whether Kili's and my plan was utterly stupid or actually rather good. Apparently the fact that we had tried to plan anything was already considered rather good because Kili tended to react and not think. Still, the King, Gloin and Dwalin weren't convinced.

In the meantime, I felt Nori's hand on my arm and he tugged lightly to make me sit once more.

"I don't care for the reasons. You put yourself in great danger."

"Nori, I had no choices…" I replied sadly, knowing he was angry.

I tried to touch his forearm but he yanked it away from me. This actually broke my heart and scared me all at once.

"You promised Amelia…" He whispered to me, looking both angry and hurt.

I felt all the remnants of anger I might have melt away. Guilt replaced it. It hurt me that I had hurt him.

"Nori I..." I murmured while the others' angry shouts covered our discussion. "I'm truly sorry."

"You promised you'd be cautious Amelia." He repeated and the anger was almost gone from his eyes, replaced by hurt and betrayal. "You weren't." His tone was final, and he was right.

"Nori." I tried to speak.

I wanted to explain to him that I truly had felt as if I had no choice.

But I couldn't.

Because Nori stood up and left the room silently.

None of the others saw him stand and stride noiselessly to the living room. Though I didn't hear the sound of the door, I just knew that Nori had left completely. I could only hope he would come back and talk to me. I would try everything to make him talk to me and listen to me. I wouldn't let our relationship fade like it had months ago. Not ever. That had been another promise and I wasn't about to break that one.

My heart clenched painfully at the thought of Nori actually refusing to talk with me. What would I do then? Suddenly the simple notion that he might not talk with me seemed more dreadful than anything else. I blinked back tears and tried to focus back on the dwarves' discussion. They were still yelling at each other. After awhile the dwarves started to calm down, though it did take several long, very long minutes, approximately half an hour actually.

"Well, there's nothing to do about it anyway. It's too late to change anything." Balin sagely concluded and I was glad that this stupid argument was over. "I just hope that you would take better care of your health next time." He added, looking at me as I nodded.

"What next time?" Dori exclaimed immediately and I could sense another heated argument.

Not wanting to listen to their yells anymore, I chose to ask the first question that crossed my mind.

"What are going to do about this?"

The King looked at me gravely and answered in a gruff voice.

"We sent a group of warriors there already. I will have to talk to this human lad once more."

"Human lad? Hector you mean? He's still here?" I was surprised to hear that, I didn't think the dwarves would like having such a guest.

"Aye, that boy might have been telling the truth." The King answered pensively.

"If that's the case, we'll have to apologize." Balin commented.

"Apologize? What for?" I felt my eyebrows rise to my hairline.

"Well, we did put him straight in a cell when he told us that some mercenaries were in that town, planning to attack dwarves." Gloin explained almost pensively.

"What?" I turned to Balin, hoping he would elaborate.

"He arrived several days after you all left. He told us men had arrived in town. From what he said, the men's leader asked about dwarves and, when the master told him about our deal and our delivery, the leader killed the master. The lad told us he had run to Thorin's Halls to ask for our help and inform us of their presence." Balin explained as if it really was natural to react in such a way to such news.

"And your first reaction was to put him in jail?" I couldn't believe it.

"That's what I said." Dís nodded at me.

"Dís…" The King sighed exasperatedly.

I wondered for a moment whether I should laugh at how ridiculous this was or if I should be truly appalled that their first reaction was to imprison the messenger. I could understand that this kind of message wasn't really welcome but still. I felt slightly bad for Hector. He had been one of the few reasonable men during our negotiations there, and he had taken risks to come here and inform the King about the mercenaries. This just highlighted how terrible dwarves were when it came to diplomacy.

I shook my head, ignoring the heated argument between the King and his sister. It sounded more like a siblings' thing than something I should pay attention to.

After a while though, they stopped arguing. As no one spoke I took the time to ponder my next action. I hadn't had the time to think this through. It was a harsh decision that I had thought about when I first came back from Gorm. Now though, with everything that had occurred in that town it seemed like the logical step to take. I knew it would cause quite a stir around me but I knew that was what I needed to do. Well, at least I thought and was convinced I needed it.

Right now, I didn't care much about the dwarves' opinions, except maybe for the three brothers. I knew myself enough to be aware of what needed to be done.

Dori had been right. Nori too.

I needed to give myself some time. With time I would be able to put it all behind myself.

Possibly.

But I couldn't go back to how things were before I left just now. I wouldn't be able to sort my feelings and thoughts properly. I needed some time away of everything.

I inhaled deeply and looked up around.

The dwarves weren't shouting at each other anymore, merely grumbling here and there and still arguing about who was right or wrong. I cleared my throat once, trying to get their attention, but it obviously didn't work. I stood up and finally took a deep breath before clapping my hands loudly. All their eyes immediately riveted on me.

I cleared my throat once more and sat back.

"Excuse me, there's just one more thing I'd like to add."

I looked at each of them and felt a slight blush creeping up my cheeks. It felt a bit awkward to have them all stare at me. I chose though to only look at the King, for he was the one I needed to speak to.

"I wish to ask you whether a change could be added in both the contracts I signed."

I shifted awkwardly on my seat before squaring my shoulders as I heard a few mumbles and I continued. I knew that most of them didn't understand what I wanted yet.

"I will not work in the healing wards anymore. Not for awhile at least and maybe not ever. I hope you'll understand." I said quickly.

This time the reactions weren't silent at all and Ori was the first and loudest to talk.

"Amelia you can't! You can't give up that! You were so happy to learn in the wards!"

"Amelia, surely there is another way…" Dori tried to argue.

"Amelia, you are a bloody good healer, you can't give up that lass." Bofur finally decided to speak up.

"Can't you all just shut it!" Dís shouted louder than the others before looking at me. "Amelia, you saved my son and I'll be eternally grateful for that. You killed a man and I understand it might be difficult for you to deal with that. But don't waste your talent over such a thing. I understand how you might feel but…"

"No you don't." I shook my head. "You don't and it's alright. It is. I need time. You're all probably thinking I'm over reacting and you might be right. First the poisoning and now this…" I closed my eyes for a second before talking again. "I don't regret my actions Dís. If it meant saving them I'll do it again. But still, that doesn't change how I feel. I'm a mess. And right now I'm sorry but I'd rather concentrate on me and my needs than on yours."

After a short silence, Balin was the one to speak.

"You changed my dear."

I quirked an eyebrow at that, not sure of how I should interpret such a statement. Of course I had changed, what did he expect? The King was the next to talk.

"I might have misjudged you." He stated calmly before nodding and adding. "I'll see to it with Balin and Dori that your wishes are respected, the modifications in the contracts will be written today."

At that he stood up, nodded and simply left the room.

"You were strong back there lass, both times. I'm sorry it didn't end well for you." Gloin stated before nodding at us and leaving.

Dwalin soon followed, but not before he nodded at me and said.

"You'd do a good dwarf."

After his younger brother disappeared behind the door, Balin turned his gaze and seemed to appraise me for a short moment. He nodded to himself and cleared his throat.

"I'll be going too. I have to check those contracts. Well, that and make sure Gloin free the poor human lad." Balin stood and came to pat my shoulder as he whispered to me. "Take your time my dear, I'm proud of you."

I felt a lump in my throat at hearing his acceptance and support. I couldn't speak at that moment and simply nodded, looking at his back while he went out. In the end I was left with the people closest to me, save for Nori who still hadn't come back. Oin looked grumpy and decided to finally voice his opinion.

"I don't agree with your decision. Sure as a healer I can understand the conflict you feel, and I'm angry at those idiots for not seeing how upset it made you." He glared at Bofur at that. "But you shouldn't give up on who you are because of it. The poisoning? That was nothing you should worry about. Killing that son of a troll? That was a damn good thing. By Mahal you should be proud!"

"Oin is right. Amelia, I wished you'd think some more about it. It isn't right for you to give up. What does it even mean? You're a healer. You can't stop to be one even if you want to. What would you do if Ori got sick or if Nori got hurt during one of his stupid expedition again?"

"I'm not giving up Dís, Oin. I wouldn't refuse to help anyone in need. If anything major happen, you know you both can count on my presence in the wards. But for now I just want to take some time and think about it all. I can't think clearly right now and it's not fair of you to ask me to act as if nothing happened."

"You're running away! We don't run away and you know it."

"Maybe. Maybe I'm running away from my problems, but you tend to forget something Dís. I'm no dwarf. I'm allowed to act cowardly."

Dís and Oin both sighed and in the end they agreed with me. Bofur had been strangely and unnaturally silent during this whole discussion and in the end he just stood up and left, simply nodding at us and not uttering a word. After a short while Dís and Oin left too and I was once more alone with the two brothers. We were all silent for several minutes until Ori spoke.

"Where is Nori? When did he leave?"

"He…left while the others were arguing." I said while staring at my plate.

We remained silent for a few minutes before Dori spoke in a kind tone.

"Balin is right, you changed."

"What does that even mean? Of course people change, it's nothing worth noticing." I replied slightly exasperated.

"You are not the little lost girl we found in the wild anymore, that's what they mean." Ori explained while standing up and starting to clean the table.

It was a bit odd to hear Ori call me a little lost girl, I tended to forget he was old enough to be my grandfather. I looked at him and tried to smile but it didn't really come out right.

"You would never have stood up to Thorin at first. And you barely spoke your mind anyway. Now you behave more like a dwarf than you seem to realize." Dori added standing up at the same time I did to help Ori.

"I'm no dwarf. I'm just a human girl who got lost in another world. Until a few days ago, I could at least say I felt like I had a purpose here, I felt I could do some good. But now here I am, killing and poisoning people around."

"Amelia…" Ori tried to interrupt me but I kept talking nonetheless.

"I'm a healer no more. I have no right to be one." I sighed forlornly and rubbed one hand on my forehead. "What was the point of all this… this madness." I felt slightly desperate at this point.

"One day, several months ago, you told me that people needed to take their own decisions, needed to make mistake even if it hurt in order to change and grow. You'll get over the pain you feel and it already changed you." Dori said softly.

"Yeah, so what? Sure it changed me. And I know it was a mistake to poison them. I knew it'd hurt me. Just like killing that man is hurting me. There's nothing to help me grow in this kind of pain."

"I don't agree with you. The poisoning, it wasn't a mistake; it was a very hard choice. Choosing to go against your beliefs… it was anything but cowardly. Having to make such kind of choices doubtlessly made you grow up. And killing this man? That was simply your instincts, and the fact that you unconsciously chose to protect dwarves simply highlight that you are one of us. You were brave and loyal Amelia. Any dwarf would be proud to call you kin."

I looked up and stared at Ori. He was frowning deeply, obviously having chosen his words carefully. Dori was looking at his youngest brother and I could see from the corner of my eye that he was proud of him. That at least made me smile a bit.

"I'm sure you'll soon find it in yourself to forgive your actions." Ori added.

I swallowed the lump that was forming in my throat. I couldn't be so certain myself.

I shivered at the thought.

Still they didn't understand why I could hurt so much over such a simple thing.

Sure Dís and Oin understood a bit; for a healer to hurt willingly innocents and then kill someone in a fit of rage? That wasn't supposed to happen.

Still, Dori's words played in my head over and over again. "Your duty was to the dwarves."

Was it as simple as that? Was it only a question of duty?

If anything these people, in this era and world, believed my acts had been right. Right because I was trying to defend their own, my own. Right because I was helping my own.

"I understand, I think, what you're all trying to make me see. I understand but I can't agree with it. Not right now. I just need some time to…to make peace."

They both nodded with their faces serious and I knew they would give me all the time I need.

At the moment though, my thoughts were miles away from trying to deal with this pain. Nori had left and I had no idea where to find him. Will he come back soon? I truly hadn't thought about the promise I had made with him. It had been an honest promise, but during the events, I simply hadn't been thinking about keeping myself safe as much as finding and rescuing the others. All my thoughts had been focused on saving the others, helping them, rescuing them from the criminals who had attacked us. I had been concentrating only on their safety and protection.

I had to protect my friends, my kin.

I froze slightly. When you put it like that the murder almost sounded less terrible…

I shook my head violently. I wanted to slap myself. Nothing. No nothing could excuse the blood rage that had made me kill a man. I hadn't been entirely myself at that moment, but even that wasn't a viable excuse. I had killed a man. That was it.

I didn't have to find excuses now.

No.

I had to reconcile the person I thought I was with the person I was in reality. And truly that was much, much more difficult.

Still, right now, only Nori should matter. Only Nori mattered. He had left. I thought for a moment that maybe I should go out and try to find him. Except…I had no idea where to look for Nori.

I didn't find Nori. I never needed to. Nori always appeared when I needed him. He always found me.

It was rather sad and hurtful to realize I didn't know that much about him.

I didn't even know where he might go when he was angry or upset.

There was no need to dwell on this now though, it was too late and Nori had already disappeared. The only thing I could do was waiting. As annoying and terrifying as it sounded, I had no other option but to wait.

And so I waited.

During the whole day I stayed in the living room, in my chair, my legs bent with my arms loosely encircling them. I kept my gaze glued to the door. I had no illusion about the fact that Nori could very well enter in the room without me noticing him if I didn't keep my eyes fixed on the only entrance.

It was rather late when the door creaked open. Dori and Ori were in the kitchen, chatting together, talking about some contracts from what I heard while preparing diner. Dori had insisted that I deserved to relax and had all but banned me from the kitchen area while they cooked. To be honest I didn't mind much at the moment, I was more preoccupied by Nori than anything else.

As soon as I saw Nori's silhouette, I jumped to my feet and rushed to him. He had seen me obviously and he waited for me there, standing next to the now closed door. His face was completely blank and he was staring at the fire in the hearth. It hurt more than I thought it could to see that he so blatantly avoided looking at me.

"Nori, please listen." I whispered.

He didn't react in any way so I swallowed thickly and decided to talk. His cold demeanour pained me horribly, scared me as well.

Was he going to keep ignoring me like this?

Was he so furious, so hurt, that he would rather not talk to me at the moment?

At the thought of all those months we spent not talking, I felt my heart broke.

I couldn't let that happen again. Never!

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><p><strong>AN: Well, first of all a HUGE THANK to every reviewer! I got all happy when I received your reviews :) Thanks everyone for the amazing and kind support! Thanks to all the readers/ followers too! **

**Thanks Mary! ^^ I'm glad you enjoyed the chapter. Don't worry, even I can't be so mean all the time with Amelia :) So yeah...there would be a few light chapters ahead.**

**I hope you all enjoyed this chapter too and that you're not too surprised by Amelia's decision. (Well, I hope you're surprised but not angry about it) Maybe you can guess what's going to happen now.**

**I'm sure some of you still have questions about the mercenaries...I swear you'll have answers, I haven't forgotten about them.**

**As for Nori and Amelia's relation, I hope you didn't expect me to start writing about fluff only :P As I said numerous times already, it's going to happen but later and really slowly ^^**

**Next chapter is going to be rather long, but I'll try to update during the weekend. Probably late Sunday.**


	25. Of Dwarves' Promises and Food Fights

**Everything belongs to JRR Tolkien, except for my plot and OC**

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><p>I grabbed his arm, afraid he would leave as soon as I would talk again. Suddenly all the words I had wanted to say were lost in my mind. There was a lump in my throat and I simply couldn't talk. What was there to say anyway? I had broken that promise and it had hurt him. Saying sorry didn't seem to be enough.<p>

I understood clearly that Nori had taken this promise really seriously. It was once more something very different between this world and mine. How many times had I used the words 'I promise' carelessly in my previous life? How many times had I broken said promises without even realizing? How many times had I cared about those broken promises? Here though I could see that it wasn't something you did. Once you gave your word you kept it. Once you swore and oath, you lived with it. Once you promised something, you did your best never to break it.

I had broken mine.

Nori was right to be angry at that.

We remained silent for several minutes and Nori didn't even glance in my direction. I couldn't read any emotion on his face, and his eyes were hidden from my view.

I didn't know what to do, much less what to say.

Everything seemed meaningless.

In the end I stepped closer to him and my hands that were gripping his forearm slid down to hold his hand instead. Gingerly I slipped my fingers against his palm and squeezed slightly. He froze completely at that. I closed the gap between us and rested my forehead on his shoulder, still holding his hand while he refused to face me.

I bit my lip and closed my eyes.

"I'm sorry." I whispered though my voice sounded strange, even to me, thick with worry, pain and regret.

He didn't move for awhile and then he sighed. I lifted my forehead and took a glimpse at him and saw him frown deeply while rubbing his forehead with his other hand.

"Amelia…" He finally murmured and I held my breath. "Do you realize how dangerous it was?"

His voice sounded so tired that I took a step back, still not letting go of his hand and looked at him. I met his grey eyes and they conveyed how exhausted he was, how worried he had been, how scared maybe too. He deserved my honesty.

"I know it was dangerous. I know. I knew it all along Nori. Kili and I fought over it during the whole day and a good part of the night too."

He didn't react and I took it as a sign I needed to continue to explain.

"But we truly had no other idea and I really didn't believe they had been killed. I didn't rush there just for the sake of it. I really thought I would be fine."

"You simply hoped they had not been killed. You hoped it would be fine." He retorted at that moment.

I was honest enough to know he was right and I admitted it shamefully. Nori sighed once more but I talked before he could.

"If you had been there, instead of me, you would have tried something too. I had to do it Nori. I had to take the risk. It was worth it."

"In the end you just endangered yourself…"

"I promised you I'll try not to take any risk, and I swear I did my best to reduce the danger."

Nori didn't answer and just looked away once again. He was going to ignore me. My heart told me that Nori really was angry against me and fear crept in my heart. I feared what Nori could do. His silence would haunt me more than anything else, except maybe for his absence. I bit my lip strongly and finally decided to resort to a very low tactic…pleading.

"Please, Nori." I looked up at him and spoke in a barely audible whisper. "I can't have you hate me. Please I'm so sorry, I don't want you to avoid me, or be angry with me. I don't want a repeat of last time."

The tears that gathered at the corners of my eyes weren't faked. I did feel like crying at the thought of Nori avoiding me again. I wasn't trying to play the little damsel in distress, even though I believed such an act could be rather effective with dwarves. No, I wasn't playing an act at all. The fear I displayed, the hurt I showed were all real. Right then, I wasn't thinking about acting or dwarves' weaknesses, no, right now all my attention was on Nori. Only and solely on him.

He groaned and pinched the bridge of his nose with his free hand. I didn't move, holding my breath, waiting for him to take a decision.

"Amelia you are the most annoying person I've ever met." He growled lowly.

I blushed at that and just couldn't resist; I immediately replied.

"Oy, you're a dwarf, surely you know someone more annoying than me."

A miracle happened just under my eyes. I saw a small smirk tug at his lips and disappear just as quickly while Nori finally turned to face me, scowling. I should have been put out by his angry frown, but to tell the truth, I was much too happy that he would look at me. That seemed rather pathetic…

"I spend my time worrying for you, because you..." He emphasized on that last word before continuing. "… spend your time running after danger and problems. Do you know how worried it makes me? Can't you understand how I… we feel about you endangering yourself. Do you want to actually kill me or my brother?"

I blinked.

"But…I'm not doing it on purpose." I stammered, surprised.

He sighed, clearly exasperated and tired. He glared at me for a second but I could see the anger melt away in his grey eyes. In the end I could only see concern left in his gaze.

"Mizimul, please be careful from now on…" He gently squeezed my hand before taking a deep breath and continuing. "I can guess you'll soon leave on various missions and I can't follow you and protect you for most of them. Thorin will not allow it."

He looked so sad, so helpless at that moment that I squeezed his hand, though I didn't realize I was doing that at the time. I frowned at his words and asked him immediately.

"Why would I go on missions? I'm quite fine staying here for a bit."

It was his turn to frown when he answered.

"Well, Thorin will probably ask Balin to put your healing skills in our list of mercenary services. Oin could do it, but is usually so grumpy with humans that it's no use sending him. And Dís just doesn't do these kinds of things. So I guess now that they have you…" He trailed off clearly unhappy at the prospect of me going away on mercenary missions.

"But Nori I…" I started and frowned. "Wait. Don't you know? I…" I hesitated once more, unsure of how to end this sentence.

'I give up healing? I'm a coward? I'm too scared to continue? I feel like I'm a failure?' Was one of those expressing what I was trying to say?

"What should I know?" Nori asked.

"I will not work in the healing wards for quite awhile. I told everyone I didn't want to be a healer anymore, well for the time being at least."

I would have thought that Nori would be annoyed at me for doing this, for abandoning healing for awhile. I had anticipated that he would be grumpy and would voice his opinion without restrictions. Well it turned out that I was wrong. Completely wrong. I was as far from the truth as I could be and it just proved that Nori knew me more than I thought he did.

After I had spoken, he had simply looked at me attentively, observing my face before locking his gaze on mine. I couldn't see any disappointment, annoyance or disapproval in his grey eyes. There was only acceptance. Immediately I felt a huge lump form in my throat but I ignored it. Nori then simply nodded, humming slightly like he often did.

"Take your time." He just said.

We remained silent for several long minutes and in that time I had turned my gaze to the floor. I couldn't help but think that Nori still hadn't forgiven me, and he hadn't said anything much. His words hadn't really registered in my brain. I was too nervous about his overall reaction to actually pay that much attention to details. In the end I heard him sigh once more and he made to turn away, probably planning to go to his room. I bit my lip and called to him as he was about to enter the kitchen. My voice was still barely above a whisper.

"Do you forgive me?"

It made him pause. He didn't turn to look at me but his head did tilt in my direction and I had to concentrate and focus hard in order to hear his answer. Not seeing his face unnerved me a bit. I wanted to be able to read him as much as I could. He didn't give me the time though.

"Of course."

I felt an immense weight lifting from my shoulders and was entirely too relieved at the thought that Nori had forgiven me. I felt a huge smile widen on my face.

I couldn't resist the sudden urge I had to embrace him.

Quickly my arms encircled his waist and I pressed my face between his shoulder blades. I tightened my hold on him as I felt him freeze in my arms. I didn't care. My heart was almost bursting with happiness at the simple fact he had forgiven me and would let me embrace him. After a short while I let my arms fall back to my sides and Nori cleared his throat, twice, before striding quickly to the kitchen.

Happily, I followed him.

I still had this smile when I entered the kitchen and sat at the table near Ori. Nori had indeed escaped to his bedroom but he came back rather quickly. Diner that day was a peaceful and cheery moment.

I was helping Dori to clean the dishes while Ori and Nori were discussing calmly, sitting at the table. The two of them were enjoying one more tankard of ale each when Ori suddenly jumped and startled, well, all of us really.

"We all forgot! We have presents for you!"

At that he rushed back to the corridor leading to our rooms.

"Presents, what for?" I stammered puzzled.

"You don't remember the day you left?" Nori asked softly and it dawned on me what they meant.

"Oh, right!" I smiled broadly when Ori rushed back in with a parchment rolled in his hands.

"Ori, don't tell me you actually got the time to do a map!" I exclaimed joyously.

"Sure I did. But actually I started it when you first left for Gorm and Fili and Kili even helped me, well before they left they helped." He said, unrolling it on the table. "We went back to the corridors where you lost your way. I mapped them too. Actually Thorin thought it wasn't such a bad idea and asked me to map the whole caves."

Ori looked so happy about it I couldn't help but chuckle happily too. Dori was radiating with pride and Nori was leaning on the table, his chin resting on his left hand. He was smirking lightly and I could easily tell he was proud of his little brother too. Now I remembered Ori's little grin and his blush when I had asked him for a map; it made sense, he obviously found it funny to realize I would ask him to do something he had already started doing. And he had blushed because he really didn't know how to lie. It was rather ironic when one knew he was the brother of a thief. To think though that he had the idea before I asked him only proved how well Ori knew me.

"That's amazing Ori."

I looked at the huge parchment and was shocked at how precise the lines and plans were. Ori had separated it in various maps corresponding to the different levels in the Halls. It was easy to understand and I soon brushed my fingers against the ways I already knew.

"You should keep it with you at all time." Nori said evenly. "We wouldn't want you to get lost while your map is safely rolled in your room." He winked at me.

This wink, more than any words, told me I was truly forgiven.

"Ahah. You know, it's an amazing job you did Ori. It probably took you forever to do that."

"It really was no trouble." Ori blushed a bit and I smiled.

I looked at him shift awkwardly on his seat and Dori patted his shoulder, showing how proud he was of his little brother. It was a very sweet sight to behold and it made me happy. Just happy. And then I realized how often I was feeling like this since I had met the three brothers. I could deal with harshness, with pain and hurt. I could deal with it all if I had the brothers with me. My lucky star had definitely been shining bright and high the day I ended up in this weird medieval world and met them.

While I was lost in my thoughts, Dori had taken out another package from its hiding spot on a high shelf and put it in front of me.

"And here is a present from all of us. I asked the best artisans to do it." Dori said putting a small leather pouch in front of me.

I looked at him and he seemed curiously impatient. I took the pouch and opened it. Inside, I could see that there was something made of leather too. I gingerly took it out from the pouch and held it cautiously. It was a small band of dark leather, at each ends there was a leather thread that would allow me to attach it to my wrist. It was simple in design but I liked it until I realized something was engraved on the band.

The symbol was odd, it represented two triangles intertwined together to form a sort of hour glass figure while the triangles' peaks formed a diamond in the middle. In the centre of the figure, there were three stars made of nine branches in a line. I was beginning to see a pattern of threes here. I looked up at Dori and asked him, genuinely curious.

"Is there a meaning in the symbol?"

"Aye, there is. It's our family's crest." Dori answered lowly while Nori was carefully observing me and Ori was unabashedly staring at me, all of them were obviously waiting for my reaction.

"Your…family crest?" I was stunned. Surely there was a meaning behind him offering me that.

"Aye. We'd like you to wear it. Added with your braid, every dwarf around will know your linked with us."

Tears welled in my eyes. It was such a sweet, meaningful gesture. I stood up and embraced Dori who patted my back. I felt so happy to receive such a present. It meant that the three brothers wanted dwarves to know I was one of them. They were acknowledging me as someone important to them, someone under their protection.

I released Dori and hugged Ori before turning to Nori. As soon as my arms encircled his shoulders, I felt Nori tense. I could only guess he was still being silly about that morning's situation. I felt a pang in my heart and sadness at the thought that something like this could create an edge between us. I truly hoped Nori would be able to overcome it because I really didn't want him to grow distant with me.

"Thank you. I didn't know you had a family crest. Does every dwarf have one?"

"No" Ori answered first.

"We have one because our family has long been a merchant's family. Before the fall of Erebor, our father was at the head of the merchants' guild." Dori elaborated.

I was surprised to hear about it. I really hadn't known they came from an apparently powerful family. I guessed that being the head of a guild was quite important in this world. I glanced at Nori, wondering why someone coming from such a line would chose to enter such a line of work.

He probably followed my trail of thoughts because he frowned and glared at me for a few seconds. I simply shrugged and stared back at him. He surprised me though when he sighed and scratched his head, suddenly looking a bit sheepish. He cleared his throat, clearly uneasy and my eyes widened when I saw his cheeks turn slightly pink. He stood up and went to his room, or so I guessed, and came back quickly.

"Here, I made this for you." He said before handing me a small package.

I took it and opened the leather package to discover a beautifully braided leather belt. It was made with several strips of leathers that were braided together masterfully. The bands didn't have the same width and their colours varied from a dark brown to a much lighter one. Together with the intricate braiding it created a beautiful and complex pattern. Then I saw the buckle and realized it was similar to the ones that the three brothers wore on their own belts, the one that I now could see was a simplified version of their family crest.

I turned to face Nori and managed to squeak a few words past the large lump in my throat.

"You did that for me? It's so beautiful…"

I couldn't resist hugging him once more and this time too he tensed, but I truly didn't care. I hugged him tightly and for a long time before freeing him and embracing his two brothers in the same way.

After I finally reigned on my bubbling feelings, I asked Dori to help me attach the bracelet properly, so that it wouldn't fall. I then proceeded to change my simple belt for the one Nori had made. I felt only happiness at that moment and everything else was completely forgotten. Nothing could have dampened my mood.

A bit later that evening Bofur, Bombur and Bifur came to share a tankard of ale after their own diner. Bofur seemed extremely upset about something. This dwarf was among the loudest I knew. He was laughing loudly, talking loudly, whispering loudly. I could have sworn he even thought loudly. That evening though, and now that I thought about it earlier that day too, he was oddly subdued. It didn't take me long to find out that he was feeling awfully guilty about what had happened twice in that bloody men's town. I sighed. Bofur was one of the nicest persons I'd met and one of my closest friends here. It was unsettling to say the least to see him being so downcast.

"Hey, Bofur, don't you want to play something tonight?"

I had asked in as soft a voice as possible and managed to get him to look up at me. His eyes were so sad and regretful, it made my heart ache. If I had any doubts, now I could anymore. Bofur was feeling guilty. I opened my mouth to speak but he was quicker.

"I'm so sorry lass. I really am. I wish I could do something to help you."

His voice was so low it was hard for me to hear him. The others were silent and looked anywhere but at me or Bofur. I stared at the sad dwarf and simply answered.

"Bofur. I hope you do realize that I'm not angry at you, right?"

"Still, it's true what you told Thorin. We should have listened to you the first time, and you did well during that second time. He had no right to talk to you like that. I'm sorry you had to … you know… in order to help us. I'm sorry you're in pain."

"You can't help it if you're dwarves." I said with a small smile. "Bofur, you lot are blunt, stubborn, silly, bloody annoying and noisy. Still, you're also very funny, loyal and honest. If I were to make those choices again, I'll be honest with you, I'll poison that water once more. I'm not angry at anyone for that. And about that…other thing I did. Well, I'd do it a hundred times over if it means the four of us can again come back alive."

"You're hurt." Bofur whispered.

The other dwarves were forgotten. In my mind, strangely, there was only me facing Bofur. I understood he felt bad because I hurt. But I wasn't sure he actually knew what hurt me most. Ever so softly I answered, nodding at the same time.

"I am. The thing is, I would do it again for you all. But it is not something I thought myself ever capable of doing. I…I'm shocked at what I was capable of for you all. And it's not really a meaningless act for me. It's complicated. I just. It's just that quite a lot of things happened in a short time. It's difficult dealing with it all."

Bofur grimaced and I glanced at Nori. He was looking straight at me, his face devoid of emotions but his eyes shining with concealed feelings I couldn't discern clearly.

"Bofur, most of my anger…it was because I was afraid that you all would despise me after what I did. And then, well, killing somebody is a crime where I come from. It's hard for me to realize I didn't hesitate in becoming a criminal." I said so lowly I thought they wouldn't hear me.

"How could we despise you lass? And you're no criminal. Not here." Bofur said, shaking his head from side to side.

"Amelia. You remember when you first arrived here?" Ori interrupted us and I nodded. "Remember those men that Dori, Nori and Gloin killed?" I nodded once more though I shivered at the memory. "You did what any loyal dwarf would have done. You protected the others in any way you could, with the poisoning and the killing. No dwarf would despise you for that. We're just sad it hurt you in the process."

They all nodded solemnly at Ori's words and it made me think about it all once more.

I realized after my little talk with Bofur that everything I said was true. I would do it again. And if I were honest with myself, it scared me. Half my fears were probably coming from that actually. I had just found out I'd be able to go to extreme length for the dwarves. I didn't even hesitate before talking back to their King. I didn't know I had such…anger or violence in me. I didn't know I'd ever be capable of deceit, lies, and potentially murder for anyone's sake; but apparently I was.

It was life shattering to realize that you'd be ready to kill innocents in order to save people close to you.

I wondered how I would have reacted if Ori or Dori had been captured.

I shivered.

I had the awful certainty that had anything befallen on either of them; the villagers would have had more to worry about than mere stomach ache. I was fairly certain I wouldn't have taken any chances and would have put larger quantities of poisons in their water. And the mercenaries? I would have burn the house down and made sure none of them got out…

Then I glanced once more at Nori. He was arching his eyebrow questioningly. Obviously he didn't know what I was thinking about.

The thought of Nori imprisoned by these men…

I was shocked to feel rage course through my veins. And then fear because I knew, I just knew that I'd killed every damn villager in this town if it meant I could save Nori. I wouldn't even have hesitated. I would have found a way, whether it was by fire, poison or the blade of my dagger…all the living souls in that damn town would have been as good as dead the moment they would have taken Nori away from me.

And I wouldn't have regretted it.

If it meant Nori was safe…then there was nothing to regret.

My eyes widened and I clenched my fists tightly.

What was happening to me?

Who was I?

* * *

><p>The following day I woke up with a weird feeling. I had absolutely no idea as to what I could do from now on. I wasn't one to stay idle. Well, my aunt would argue with that; she believed that reading novels equalled to being idle.<p>

In any case, here I had no novels to read, no music to listen to, no computer, nothing really. I really didn't feel like going to the healing wards, I had been entirely truthful about it. I needed a break to think and find out what was going on in my head.

I slowly sat and took my time before standing up. It was so calm around, so peaceful. Still I didn't feel like staying in the house and doing nothing but thinking again and again about the events would change anything for the better. I wanted to take some time off of herbs, blood, medicine and anything even remotely close to this.

I didn't want to have too much free time either. I didn't feel ready to confront my own thoughts and emotions. The things I had realized the previous evening had shattered me. I was past shocked. This new found rage and protectiveness for the dwarves was baffling. I didn't want to ponder on that yet. I wanted to breathe again before actually trying to think about all those depressing and disturbing thoughts.

I put on some clothes and got out of my room, wondering what time it was and why none of the brothers had awakened me. When I pushed the door to the kitchen I was only half surprised to see Bofur, Bifur and Bombur there.

"Dori, do you think we should change the living room into a dormitory?" I heard myself ask.

"Amelia!" Dori greeted me with a smile before frowning. "Why do you say that?"

"Well, they spend so much time here, they might as well move in." I smiled at Bofur who winked at me.

Bombur was eating heartily his breakfast and I caught Nori quickly using the distraction I had involuntarily made to steal sausages from Bofur's and Dori's plate. He winked at me when he saw I had caught him red handed. I couldn't help it, it made me smile.

"Well, actually we're here for a reason today!" Bofur said while trying to poke at his disappeared food.

He looked down at his plate when he heard the clank of the fork against the metallic plate. I smiled some more when I saw him frown.

"Nori…" He groaned but the sneaky thief had already eaten everything, efficiently erasing any proof of his mischief.

"Aye?" The cheeky dwarf managed to look innocent.

Bofur shook his head while Dori, who had finally realized the theft, glared at his brother.

"So, we're here to know what you're going to do today." Bofur continued.

"Well…I'm not sure actually." I took a seat next to Ori, facing Nori.

"You could come and work with Bifur and me."

"I've never…Bofur, it's really nice and I'd love to accept. But I don't know anything about how to do what you guys do."

"We could teach you!" Bofur seemed enthusiastic about the prospect of teaching me until Bombur interrupted.

"You could come and work with me in the kitchen. Help is always welcomed there!"

I glanced around the strangely silent table. Why did they all look so horrified? Except maybe Nori who hid it better, but all the others were staring at Bombur in disbelief.

"Are you. Are you sure it's a good idea?" Dori asked.

"Well yeah, why not?" Bombur shrugged before biting a large piece of bread.

"I know how to cook too. It could be fun." I added, smiling at the ginger dwarf.

"Really Amelia. You are sure it's such a good idea?" Dori insisted.

"Do you have anything against my cooking?" I quirked an eyebrow at him.

At that Dori didn't say anything anymore. I knew of course they were thinking about the only two times where I had somehow forced them to eat odd dishes according to their taste. Still, in the big kitchens with Bombur, I would listen to him, not cook my favourite recipes.

Bombur was smiling happily at me and I mirrored it. The idea of doing something completely different and new was refreshing. I could already feel some weight lifting of my shoulders; my worries slowly being forgotten thanks to the prospect of learning something new. My concern over turning into some sort of monster was in the far back of my mind at the moment. I felt much better not having such thoughts whirling around in my mind.

I chose not to be concerned by the other dwarves' doubts either. After all, I doubted that they were culinary experts.

I was certain it was an amazing idea for me to join Bombur and work in the kitchen.

* * *

><p>I followed Bombur when he left the apartment. The round dwarf was a real nice person, but that wasn't so surprising considering he was Bofur's brother. The both of us made our way towards the main kitchen, and I was happy to find it was marked in the plan Ori had made for me. As I had promised, I kept it on me at all time, and especially when I roamed the corridors. I'm sure the King would appreciate the gesture.<p>

At the moment, Bombur was explaining how dwarves working in the mines and forges would be distributed lunchboxes during their break. It was our job to prepare the food and the boxes and some other dwarves would deliver them.

I listened intently to Bombur until he stopped in front of large doors.

"Here we are." He said while pushing the doors open.

As soon as he did so, a mouth-watering smell started to float in the air around us. Hadn't I just eaten, I swear I would have jumped on the food right then.

"Oh my, what are you cooking?" I couldn't help but ask.

"Today we're preparing honey cakes and roasted pork and beef. We'll boil some potatoes later too."

Bombur, while he answered, walked in and took a large apron that was hanging on a hook. I looked around and discovered a massive kitchen with huge ovens and hearths. Two pigs were currently roasting in two of the four hearths and I could see one dwarf taking a huge plate out of one of the ovens.

"How many dwarves work in the mines and forges?" I asked genuinely curious.

"Around two hundreds." Bombur answered while looking around.

"It's not that much." I said, honestly surprised.

"Aye. There aren't that many of us."

Bombur's face turned sad and I felt bad for putting this expression on his usually cheery face.

"Well. It's still quite a lot of people to cook for!" I exclaimed joyously.

"Sure is!" Bombur laughed loudly then.

During that morning I spent some time peeling potatoes and cutting the meat into smaller pieces so that the dwarves could eat it easily. Bombur was always beside me, talking, joking, explaining and listening to my questions and thoughts.

Soon I wondered why I had never discussed more with him; he was such an easy person to talk to.

While he cooked, he'd taste everything he'd make and forced me to do so too. I had to admit the meat was perfectly done, crunchy on the outside and perfectly roasted while the inside was tender and would melt on one's tongue. And the honey cakes were just delicious, spongy enough and sweet yet not overly so. Oh my, I could have eaten the whole batch had Bombur not kicked me away from it, laughing all the while and helping himself to a second serving.

I used to say that Bofur's laugh was incredible; the dwarf always seemed to laugh with his whole heart. Bombur's laugh was entirely similar if more impressive to witness. He put his two larges hands on his belly and let his head fall back, laughing merrily while his belly would bounce at each laugh.

Bombur seemed to laugh all the time over the simplest things too. Soon he had me brushing away tears from my cheeks for his mood was entirely too contagious.

After one of those laughing fit, I managed to catch my breath before asking Bombur.

"Do you always cook the same things?"

"Aye. More or less. Potatoes, bread or cakes. And meat. Sometimes we do soup and stew too."

"Why don't you ever try any changes?"

Bombur shrugged while he put an enormous pile of empty lunchboxes made of wood in front of us.

"Never really thought about it. The lads need to eat a lot. Those recipes are good for that. It's not banquet food."

"Sure, but for example you could try to do some stuffed meat, or meat with pastry crust." I said while putting in each lunchbox a healthy serving of meat. "Or cook the meat in a different way or with a sauce."

"Pastry crust?" Bombur asked while he added two potatoes in each box.

"Yes. You prepare crust, then for example, you roll your piece of meat in it and you bake the whole together. It's nice. Or you can bake the minced meat in pies." I replied repeating the same task over and over again.

"It does sound nice." Bombur frowned, thinking about my words.

We spent some more time preparing lunchboxes, the other dwarves in the kitchen adding cakes after we put meat and potatoes. To my surprise, all the dwarves around were as curious as Bombur about my ideas and recipes. I was shocked too when Bombur praised my recipe of black pudding with apples. The others looked at me strangely but agreed to try it once.

I smiled hugely at that. Maybe it was just the three brothers and Bofur who had weird tastes? Maybe the other dwarves would enjoy other recipes? I ended up discussing a variety of menus with the cooks and time flew quickly. Soon other dwarves came in, took the lunchboxes away and we were left discussing what to prepare for this evening's dinner.

"So, how do you make those stuffed meat with pastry crusts and meat pies?"

"We'd need something else Bombur." One of the dwarf commented.

"What about this pork roasted with honey?" Another one asked.

I smiled widely at Bombur and the cooks. So far I really enjoyed working with them all.

* * *

><p>Later that evening, I was quite proud of my achievements. With the other dwarves we had prepared minced meat pies and I was quite happy with the results. They had roasted pieces of pork with a sweet sauce made mostly of honey. It smelt delicious.<p>

I had never cooked anything in such huge proportions before and it was challenging, but thankfully, Bombur and the others were used to this. Honestly they did most of the job.

The smell of the freshly baked pies was amazing and it was hard not to have a bite. We had minced pork meat with potatoes, mushrooms, carrots we had to battle to find, and we had put all this mix in huge plates where we had first put the pastry dough. We had then recovered the pies with some more dough and had cooked all of it.

We only kept three pies for us to eat as well as some of the caramelised pork when other dwarves came to gather that evening's meal. They would serve it to the dwarves in the main dining hall. Meanwhile, Bombur divided the pies in huge pieces and gave one to each of us. Another dwarf was serving the pork. The dwarves dived in immediately while I waited for their comments.

"Oh, it's kinda weird." One of them said.

"Sure is, but it's tasty. I like it. The pork especially." The second told us.

"The pie gives a bit of a sweet taste. It's really different."

"And the carrots too."

"I can't decide whether it's salty or sweet." Another added with a deep frown looking at his food.

"It really is completely different, but I like it." Bombur said in a smile.

"I'm glad you do." I answered, smiling back and finally taking a bite of food.

We were all eating peacefully when the huge doors of the kitchen opened to let the King enter. He immediately spotted us and strode in our direction. His face was a blank mask I couldn't read.

"Bombur, what is this?" He asked pointing at the food left untouched still.

"It's minced meat pie and caramelised pork." The round dwarf answered.

I had never seen the King looking quite so tired before. He sighed loudly and rubbed his hands on his face.

"Why did you do that?"

"I gave them the idea." I answered honestly.

The icy blue eyes turned towards me, apparently surprised and annoyed. I saw him frown and silently hoped he wouldn't yell at me for having chosen to work here.

"Miss Amelia. I do understand your will to change your activities." He clearly gritted his teeth. "But would you please try not to threaten the peace of these Halls."

"Eh? What? What do you mean?" I really didn't understand what he was talking about.

"Half of the dwarves in the dining hall are currently yelling that this isn't proper food. Another part is trying to defend the cooks' honours and a last part is mocking the first one, saying they have no taste and that this is actually good. All in all I have currently a colony of dwarves fighting in my halls…over pies and pork."

Oops.

I felt bad for the King, I really did. I could pretty well imagine a group of rowdy dwarves yelling at each other and fighting over the most stupid topics. It couldn't be easy to be the King of such a group of people. Still, the idea that they were fighting over pies and caramelised pork made a small chuckle bubble out of my mouth. I quickly pressed my hand over my lips trying to stop my laugh but the harm had already been done. Hearing me laughing, Bombur started to chuckle too.

When Bombur chuckled, his belly would bounce lightly and quickly and his long moustache braid was bouncing with it. It made me laugh. After that the poor King sighed and let himself almost fall on the bench nearby, dropping his head in one of his hands.

I did offer him a piece of pie and he glared at me before taking the offending object and biting in it. I smiled when I saw first a look of surprise ghost over his features and then a deep frown. But as he always frowned I couldn't know for sure whether that was a good sign or not.

Bombur and the other cooks were silent, as was I, while the King ate slowly. He eyed the piece of pie in his hand before finishing it.

"T'is not bad." He said in his deep voice. "But please, try not to make too much of those. I really don't want to have fights because of food."

We all nodded and I thought he would leave just like that. But he didn't. He looked at me and seemed to ponder on something for a minute before telling me.

"Miss Amelia, maybe you should refrain on giving too many ideas to our cooks and try to find another activity to occupy yourself. One that doesn't put the dwarves on a war path if possible."

"I…" I was honestly shocked by his words. "I'll try to find something else sir."

At that he simply nodded and left. Bombur was kindly patting my shoulder and reassuring me that my recipes were very good and that anyone should be honoured to have the opportunity to fight over them. It was sweet and I thanked him with a smile. But at that moment I only wanted to go back home.

* * *

><p>I held my head low that evening when I went back to the three brothers' apartment. I was feeling pretty discouraged when I opened the door. Immediately I was assailed by noise, though it wasn't the usual one.<p>

"Ow! Be careful lad! That hurts!"

"I'm not a healer." Ori sighed as I entered the room.

Nori and Bofur were sitting on chairs, Bofur holding clean linen against his head while Nori seemed to be holding his arm quite cautiously. Dori was nowhere to be seen until he arrived, a bowl in hand, and a massive bruise already forming around his left eye.

"What happened to you all?"

They all startled and for a second I was rather proud to have surprised them. With their very keen ears, it was rather rare I could.

I looked at the four dwarves who stared right back. Ori was the only one who didn't seem to suffer from any injury. What had happened to the others? It seemed unlikely that they would fight against each other. I stood still at the entrance, frowning, when I finally realized something.

"Did you by any chance go to eat in the main hall tonight?"

At that question they all exchanged glances and looked rather sheepish. I rolled my eyes, seriously how silly could they be? Fighting not for food, but because of disagreement over taste? That was ridiculous.

I sighed and went in my room without uttering a word. There I took my satchel where all my tools were and went back just as silently in the direction of the living room. The dwarves looked downcast. I had no idea why they would, after all dwarves usually enjoyed a nice, friendly fight.

"What did you think of it?" I asked, attempting to break this unbearable silence.

I didn't need to explain that I was talking about the food. These dwarves were smart. They probably had guessed I was behind the recipes. Nori glanced at me and I offered him a smile. I took a seat in front of Bofur and took the bowl of water from Dori's hands. Ori, seeing that I was taking charge of this, just chose to sit nearby and remained silent.

"So? Did you lose your tongues?" I insisted.

"It was…" Dori started.

"Different?" Bofur offered.

"Nice." Nori added in a low voice. "It was nice. I liked it."

"You did?" I looked up abruptly, pleasantly surprised by his words.

My heart seemed to beat a bit harder against my ribcage and my chest seemed to tighten a bit after I heard those words. I didn't even try to analyze these feelings. Nori's words were making me happier than I thought they would and nothing else seemed to mattered.

"Aye. T'was nice." He mumbled, looking at the fire in the hearth.

"It wasn't bad, but hem…maybe not as popular as it should have been?" Dori tried to be diplomatic.

"It was better than the pudding and apple. But lass, you can't do weird stuff like that for the Halls dining room." Bofur bluntly told me.

He received a swift kick in the shin from Nori who glared at him.

"Oy!" Bofur complained and I decided to intervene before another fight started.

"It's alright. I won't work in the kitchens anymore. The…the King asked me to, erm, avoid going back there with such ideas."

I felt myself blush slightly. I was a little bit ashamed that a simple idea of mine had transformed the Halls into fighting rings. I cautiously removed the linen Bofur was holding on his head and cleaned the cut he had above his left eyebrow. It was shallow and didn't require any treatment, though I dabbed a bit of thyme essence on it for good measures. I put a fresh bandage around his head and turned toward Dori.

The older dwarf had mostly bruises and there truly wasn't much to be done. Considering the strength of the dwarves, I knew those bruises wouldn't stay long. Ori was perfectly fine too and was the first one to speak.

"If you miss those dishes, you can try them here."

I froze. Ori had always been the most reluctant of them to try my 'strange food' as he put it. For him to say such a thing just highlighted how much he cared about me. I couldn't resist. I jumped up and hugged him and closed my eyes for a second.

"Thanks Ori. I'm sorry for the troubles I caused."

"T'was nothing lass. Dwarves love a good fight from time to time."

Bofur smiled at me and I ended up hugging him too until I thought about something.

"Oy. On which side were you guys?"

"Side?"

"You heard me Bofur. Were you fighting for my dishes or against them?"

I eyed him critically, suddenly suspicious.

Bofur though reacted in his usual way. He laughed heartily, not saying an actual word. Dori was now sitting on a chair near the fire, looking exhausted, and Ori was dozing in his chair. Nori had retreated in the shadows, standing a bit away from us all and I was sure he would soon try to sneak away. Yet I was certain he had been hurt and there was simply no way I'd let him go without checking him properly. Meanwhile I tried to find out what would annoy Nori so much that he'd rather not be healed.

Bofur was finally calming down and he brushed away a few tears from his eyes before looking at me.

"Lass, it hurts me how suspicious you can be."

"Oh sure, you look like you're agonizing." I deadpanned.

"Don't be like that. Of course we defended your weird culinary ideas." He winked at me before standing up.

He stretched and finally, after saying goodbye to everyone, left to go back to his place. At the door though he turned to me and said with a smirk.

"Tomorrow, if you wish, I'll show you the workshop where Bifur and I work."

"Thanks Bofur. I'll wait for you here then." I agreed, though I wasn't sure I had many choices left.

And with just that, I ended up being with the three brothers. I observed Nori who was slowly making his way towards the door, clearly attempting to retreat in his room and I just couldn't accept that.

"Dori, Ori, you both look really tired. Don't worry, I'll clean up here you can both go to sleep. Nori, come here, I still haven't check your wounds."

"Are you sure you don't need help to clean all this?" Ori asked

"Don't worry, I'll be fine. Go to sleep, you look like you both need it." I brushed his concern off.

Dori was almost at the door when he turned and looked at me for a minute. He smiled softly before speaking.

"Don't feel bad about today Amelia, your dishes aren't bad. They're just unusual and dwarves sometime don't do well with unusual."

I smiled at Dori for his words. I knew he meant it too and I knew he was right. Dwarves were an old, ancient race, from what I had found out. They had traditions and habits and tended to stick to those. Change wasn't that much welcome in their Halls. Yet they had accepted me fairly well so far, so it wasn't even right to say that. They were strange people. That much was sure, but I liked them. I liked it here.

I realized it clearly now.

Even though I had been hurt, felt lost and different, even though I was changing into someone I wasn't sure was a good person, I still liked it. It felt right to live with the dwarves. It felt right to be with them. How many months did it take me to come to such a conclusion? Spring would soon be here. Soon it would be a year since my arrival and I found myself thinking less and less of my world as my home. The world where I had been born was starting to be just that; my birthing place.

It was very strange and it made me uneasy too.

How could anyone forget so easily about the place he had lived most of his life in? I still missed my aunt and uncle. I still suffered from my parents' death and the drama that had followed it. I still thought about them but it felt recently as if something was changing.

I frowned.

Now wasn't the time to think about that. I needed to check on Nori and his odd behaviour would probably not help.

Wordlessly Ori and Dori had left the living room and I had smiled at them both. Nori on the other hand was unmoving. Clearly he hadn't expected me to order him to stay. It was strange to see him being obviously unsure of what to do. I was used to confident, cheeky, smug, teasing Nori.

Once we were both alone, we remained motionless for a while, observing each other from the corner of our eyes.

I could feel a strange tension in the room. Strange I said, because I wasn't used to that kind of atmosphere with Nori. Eyes still locked on him, I moved slowly, sitting on the small table just near the hearth. I pointed at the chair in front of me and didn't say a word. It was fairly obvious what I wanted him to do, no point in voicing it.

It took him longer than I expected to simply come and sit just in front of me.

I kept silent too. I could guess his right arm was injured somehow, as he was cradling it protectively against his chest. Slowly, with movements that reminded me of someone treating a wounded, scared child, I took hold of his right hand. He let me but still avoided to look at me. This man was starting to be impossible to understand.

At that moment I realized how well I was starting to know him. I just knew that if I were to ask him anything right now, I'd merely receive grunts for answers. I didn't even bother then, simply gingerly touching and motioning his hand.

All the while I observed his face and even though he tried to hide it, I could see clearly the slight wince he made when I applied some more pressure on his wrist. I placed his injured hand on my thighs, sensing him tense immediately at that, as I took the time to look in my satchel for a special ointment made of Witch Hazel and Goatweed. Nori was still a perfect impersonation of a statue.

I sighed and gently applied the ointment on his wrist. Clearly something was wrong. I was persuaded he had forgiven me. He had said so, and he even managed to wink and smirk at me. So why would he be so nervous when he was near me? Every time I was touching him, Nori would tense. It didn't make sense.

I quickly finished to bandage tightly his articulation and saw that he was about to leave, just like that, without a word. I couldn't take it. His behaviour was just weird and plain ridiculous. Not waiting for him to stand up, I took his left hand in mine and spoke.

"Nori." I said softly. "If I did anything wrong, of course you'd tell me, right?"

It took him a moment to answer and still, his gaze was avoiding me.

"You did nothing wrong."

"Then, why are you so obviously avoiding me?"

A doubt started to grow in my mind. There were just two things that could annoy him and that I could think of. The first one had been forgiven. As for the second one… No. It couldn't be about the fact that we woke up together. It would be entirely too stupid; it was such an old way of thinking…oh. Right. Middle age era. When would I learn? It seemed that the longer I spent time here, the more I forgot about their bizarre and archaic ways. That was just not normal.

"Nori. Are you still, annoyed, about yesterday…" I stammered a bit, looking for the right words to say.

"It's fine." He interrupted me. "Everything's fine."

I could see a slight blush on his cheeks and hesitated between sighing in annoyance or smile. He was quite cute like this, though I would never say that aloud, he'd rather hear how handsome he was, I'd bet. Oh dear, now I'm blushing too. Time to change my trail of thoughts. I cleared my throat lightly and said.

"Please, I really don't want to lose you over such a silly thing."

"It's not…"

"I know it's not considered silly around here, but it's just the two of us who know about it. So let's." I hesitated for a second. "Let's just completely forget that it happened and move on. Alright?"

Weird, it actually pained me a bit to say that.

"Alright." He relented and I concentrated on him again.

"Sure this time? You're not going to disappear for a month or avoid me for a year?" I teased.

He rolled his eyes and finally looked at me. I was entirely too happy to see his smirk back on his lips.

"I won't avoid you, but I might disappear as you put it, soon."

His voice had lowered at the end of his sentence. I frowned and whispered back to him.

"Nori, you plan on going…thieving again?"

He didn't answer and I observed him for a while. I suddenly remembered our discussion that time when he had been injured.

"Are you even close to finding it?"

It was nothing short of a miracle that he managed to hear me. This time, it was my turn to avoid looking at him. At my words I had seen the hurt flash in his eyes and I could guess easily that this wasn't an easy topic for him. I had no idea what it was exactly that he was looking for, but it had to be something really important for him to go against the opinions of every one he knew.

"Maybe. This time I have good hopes."

I was shocked he even answered my question. My head turned back to face him and I saw him looking down. Following his gaze I realized we were still holding hands. I hadn't paid attention to that until then. I felt a slight blush cover my cheeks once more and had to clear my throat again before speaking.

"Please, at least wait until your wrist is perfectly healed before you leave."

My whispered words made him look straight into my eyes. I could see he was surprised and intrigued.

"You're not going to ask me not to go?"

In all honesty, I didn't want him to go on one of his little thieving trips. But I simply knew that whatever I would say wouldn't stop him. Nori apparently needed to do this. I had no idea what he was looking for, but he had been searching for it for decades. I had no right to stop him in his personal quest. I had no right and it would be wrong to even try.

I didn't answer him, what was the point anyway. I could only make sure he'd leave the Halls healthy enough to face what awaited him outside. I hated it but I had no choice. I had to help him any way I could. And right now, I could only ask him to wait a bit.

"Just wait until you wrist is healed." I simply insisted.

"Alright." He sighed after a while.

"You promise you'll wait?"

"I promise."

I smiled at that. In my mind there was simply no way that Nori, or most of the other dwarves for that matter, would break a promise. They were so hell-bent on being honourable that they wouldn't break a promise made to a friend if they could help it.

"Alright. Then promise me you'd let me check you for injuries when you come back."

"Amelia." He sighed exasperatedly.

"Nori." I mimicked his tone.

He glared at me and I just smirked. Finally he relented. Oh my, I was starting to be good at this, I was apparently able to break into a dwarf's stubborn head and make him actually see sense. I should receive a price for such an achievement.

"Alright. I'll tell you if I'm injured."

"Nuh huh. You'll let me check you. I don't trust you for that. I know you dwarves believe you're indestructible or something equally stupid."

"Alright, alright woman. You're entirely too stubborn for your own good."

"Oh, I've had wonderful teachers and examples in stubbornness."

Finally he smirked at me some more. The playful glint in his grey eyes was back and it warmed my heart to see it. I smiled a toothy grin at him.

"Oy, don't mock the dwarves!" He jokingly growled.

"I'm not mocking them, I'm afraid I'm becoming like one!" I said in a mock desperate tone.

At that Nori's smile widened and he even let himself chuckle lightly while shaking his head from side to side.

"Aye. You are."

I smiled at that, happy to be able to talk with him like this. It felt right and it appeared that the tension from earlier tonight was nothing but a dream. Nori stood up then, forcing me to let his hand go.

"You should go to sleep. Working with Bofur and Bifur might prove difficult."

"It's such a hard work?"

"Nah…Bofur is just terribly annoying and he and Bifur often end up yelling at each other in Khuzdul."

I chuckled at that. It was easy to imagine Bofur making wide hand gesture while Bifur would just huff and groan.

"Go to sleep Mizimul."

I looked up to see Nori was already hidden in the shadows of the kitchen. I smiled sweetly at him and nodded, to let him know I'd soon go to my room. I looked at him disappear in the kitchen and finished to gather my belongings, putting everything back in its rightful place in my satchel.

I was particularly meticulous with my medicinal satchel, I wanted everything to always be at the same place; like this if I were to use it in case of emergency, I wouldn't have to rummage around to find anything.

Not even ten minutes later, I was already in my bed.

While I lay on my back that night, I couldn't help but think about Nori and our discussion. I was glad that in the end he had managed to forget his annoyance about what had happened two nights ago. I was relieved he had forgiven me for breaking our promise too. I was really happy to be able to talk to him, joke and tease him. But I was even happier to see he allowed me to talk about private things with him. I wasn't sure, and I would never ask, but I had a hunch that not so many people around knew why Nori was a thief.

I felt somehow privileged to be able to talk to him about that. I wasn't even sure Dori and Ori knew about this thing Nori was looking for.

My curiosity made me wonder what kind of object could be so precious for someone to spend most of his life as a thief to retrieve it.

I truly hoped, for Nori's sake, that he would find what he was looking for. It hardly seemed fair for him to be looking for it for so long.

A short while later, I finally fell asleep, my mind filled with thoughts of Nori.

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><p><strong>AN: Wow! Thanks everyone for all the amazing support! I was really overwhelmed with all the reviews I received for the last chapter :) It was great! Thank you all a lot! Thanks every reader/follower too!**

**Mary: Thanks a lot! I'm glad you liked it :) I really wanted to show that Amelia was now really growing up. As for Nori...I won't say a word ;) but maybe this chapter hinted a bit more as to what he might (or not) be feeling. I hope you liked this chapter too.**

**Kyle: Thanks for the review. :) I'm really happy to see you're enjoying this story! I hope I won't disappoint you.**

**As for this chapter...well I couldn't keep on writing drama, right? So here's a rather light chapter for you. I know I may have made the dwarves overreact with the food but...well, I liked the picture of them all fighting over nothing. I hope you liked to see a tiny bit more of Bombur too.**

**I invented the crest, but I used (or tried to) the form on Nori's belt for inspiration.**

**I hope the rest of the chapter isn't too messy. It's past 1AM here and I'm just so tired that I had trouble to read and think straight...sorry if the chapter isn't so good or if there's even more mistakes than usual.**

**I'm rather busy this week and I couldn't find time to write much these days (which annoyed me a lot!)...I'll try to update the next chapter in 2 or 3 days. I think Wednesday normally.**

**Thanks a lot for your support everyone!**


	26. Stubborn like a Dwarf

**Everything belongs to JRR Tolkien except for the plot and my OC**

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><p>"So, lass, ready for a day's work?"<p>

I chuckled at Bofur's enthusiasm. It was rather early in the morning and he was already behaving rather cheerfully. I was following him in the corridor, going towards the lower levels of Thorin's Halls. He was whistling loudly a merry tune which made me smile as I walked next to him.

"Are we going to the forges?" I asked genuinely curious.

"The forges? Nah. I'm going to show you our workshop. Today we'll work mostly at the carvings. We go to the forges once a week only."

I nodded, slightly surprised. It was somehow odd to think that I had been living here for quite some time now, and I still hadn't seen the forges and mines. I knew now that those two parts of the halls were maybe the most important ones for the dwarves. They were constantly digging deeper and deeper in the mountain, hoping to find some precious stones and metals.

I knew that in their old kingdoms, they mined gold, silver and precious stones. Here though, the soil wasn't so rich and they all lived in fear of seeing the small vein of silver end soon. Dori had told me once that some dwarves were starting to wonder whether they shouldn't simply abandon their houses here and leave for the Iron Hills. It was sad to think they would be ready to leave their home for another kingdom far to the east.

When I had asked Dori what his opinion on this was, he had scoffed and said he would never abandon his king.

I remember smiling then; not because I found it funny or silly. Not at all. I had smiled because I had felt a deep affection for Dori then. He was such an honourable dwarf, so loyal to the King. I had been honestly impressed. Thinking a bit more on it though, I had realized that it was the case for most of the dwarves I knew and spoke to on a daily basis.

"Have you ever been to the forges lass?"

Bofur's voice brought me back to the present and I shook my head.

"No. Never had the occasion really. I heard it's quite impressive though."

"Impressive?" He snorted. "You'll never see anything like it anywhere else! Except maybe in other dwarves' halls." He proudly stated.

"Well, I'll have to work well today then, so that I'll come back the day you go there." I replied jokingly.

"You don't need to work well for that, lass. T'is a shame you've never seen them though. I'll show you some other time." He smiled kindly.

"Thanks Bofur."

We had finally arrived in front of large double doors. Bofur pushed one of them and gestured me to follow him. When I entered I suddenly felt like I was in Santa's toy factory. There were toys everywhere and of many different sorts, though all were in wood or metal.

I let my gaze wander from the dwarf warriors to small wooden swords, to some dwarf maid and wooden horses. It was impressive all the details there were on those.

"Bofur, that's amazing. I didn't see so many of them in the market!" I exclaimed as my eyes were caught by a dragon hanging from the ceiling.

"Aye. We sell most of them in spring and summer when we go to the humans' markets. During winter we mostly build our stock."

"How can you do that?" I asked amazed at the details and precision of the different toys.

Bofur simply laughed and beckoned me to come over. He was standing next to another open door. I followed him in the next room and couldn't stop a gasp. In this part of their workshop, they piled up all the plates, bowls and cups I loved so much. There were quite a lot of them and they reflected the light of the few torches.

"You know, I love those." I said with a smile.

"Aye. They sell well." Bofur nodded, still smiling.

He let me look around freely. My fingers were brushing against the metal and the carvings until I finally turned around to face him.

"So, what am I supposed to do boss?"

"Boss?" He repeated with a frown.

"Aye, that means…hem, leader?"

"Oh…hem right. We'll see how you fare with carving plates. Come, Bifur's probably here already."

I followed him to a third room where we indeed met with Bifur. The dwarf grunted in my direction and I greeted him with a smile. I was already used to his strange behaviour. I quickly looked around and saw a variety of unfinished objects ranging from toys to metallic plates. It looked rather messy but I had this hunch that it was the kind of usual mess that Bofur and Bifur worked in.

I wouldn't try to tidy up the place…that I knew for certain.

"So, have you ever engraved anything before?" Bofur joyously asked me while guiding me to a neat table and chair in the far corner of the room.

"Never."

"Well, there's a start to everything."

* * *

><p>Four hours later my eyes hurt from being so focused for so long on some metallic plate. Still I was quite happy with the result. Of course I wasn't even nearly as good as the dwarves were, but I was quite proud of my little achievement.<p>

During this time I had nearly had two heart attacks when Bofur and Bifur had suddenly started to shout at each other. The first time I was entirely focused on my plate when I had heard a soft grunt and then after a few seconds, Bofur had shouted something in Khuzdul, to which Bifur had replied harshly.

The second time it had been a loud clanking noise that had startled me. Of course it had been followed by the two dwarves yelling at each other. At this point I had turned to observe them. My eyes widened when I saw Bofur pick up a plate randomly before he threw it at his cousin's back. Thankfully Bifur caught it and sent it back with what I believed was a curse in Khuzdul. This little fight had lasted ten good minutes too.

Nori had been right after all. Working with Bofur and Bifur was…special.

Still, in four hours I had managed to engrave a leaf pattern on the outskirt of the plate. Bofur and Bifur had simply showed me how they worked at first and had then shoved in my hands a plate and the tools I'd need to work. Apparently they believed in learning by doing. Well, I didn't complain, and I had made sure anyway that the plate I had been given wasn't too expensive; like this at least I could buy it if I made a mess of it.

But as I said, I was quite proud with my little leafy pattern. For now I had managed to grave on the metal six leaves linked together with curved lines. It was nothing like anything I had seen made around, but it was honestly the only thing I knew how to draw reasonably easily. It reminded me of the holiday's time when my aunt would made me draw on the windows those patterns, obviously using some special pens. Sometimes we would even decorate the mirror in the entrance too. Those were sweet memories.

It explained why I was feeling quite giddy when Bofur came to see me.

"So lass, how did it…"

I looked at him when I heard him stop mid-sentence. He looked surprised, his eyes wide, and I could easily tell that he really wasn't sure what to tell me or how to react at that moment.

"Alright. What is it this time?" I sighed resigned.

"Well, it's not bad for a first try, lass. But that pattern." Bofur smiled, obviously trying to be nice."

"What about it?" I asked.

I really didn't see any problem with a Christmassy leaf pattern.

"Well…it looks entirely too…elvish."

The way he had said that made me think that Bofur was afraid he'd offend me. It took me some time to put two and two together but even then I wasn't entirely sure he was talking about Santa's elves. Surely he didn't mean to tell me that Santa indeed existed here and that he had an army of little creature decorating his toys and his factory and everything for Christmas. It just didn't make sense that such a thing would happen here.

"And it's that bad? That it looks elvish I mean."

"Well, it's really not good. Think meat pies, sugary pork and black pudding with apple all together. That's about how it's going to be perceived."

"You've got to be joking!" I really couldn't believe that.

"Afraid not." He replied calmly.

"Oh seriously? I'm starting to think that whatever those elves are, I'd be better off with them." I groaned disappointed.

The grunt and the string of Khuzdul I heard just then led me to believe that Bifur highly disagreed with me. I couldn't be sure, for I didn't speak a word of the language, but it did sound like quite a lot of swearing.

"My cousin's right. You shouldn't say that lass. It'd break the hearts of the brothers. Anyway, you behave too much like a dwarf to get along with elves." Bofur patted my shoulder kindly.

"Are you telling me I'm noisy and annoying?" I retorted, arching my eyebrow at him.

"Nah, just saying you're a good lass."

I smiled widely at Bofur. In all truth I didn't feel like slaving away in some weird place with little creatures. I felt quite fine here with the dwarves and though they were sometimes particularly annoying, I liked them. It had become my home, for better or for worse. I could now admit it shamelessly. It was coming close to a year since my arrival in this world and it hadn't overall taken me much time to come to see this place as a home.

The weirdest part being that I had the feeling I fitted better here, even with all my oddities, than in the world I had been born in. I didn't know if I would ever go back there, but if I didn't I knew I'd forever be sad for leaving my uncle and aunt behind. Still I had to admit that leaving my friends here and going back was…

It was simply unbearable to think I could leave this place and never see them again.

I just couldn't see my future without Ori to talk to, Dori to advise me or Nori to…be Nori.

At that thought a slight blush crept up my cheeks.

I didn't understand.

Nori was maybe my closest friend here, and if I were honest, he was probably the one I'd miss most if I were to leave. Well it wasn't saying much because I knew I'd miss everyone terribly.

Shaking those thoughts away, I wasn't going anywhere if I could help it, I concentrated some more on Bofur who was analysing my work.

"You got precise hands, but don't you think you could try another pattern? Like those?" He handed me a plate Bifur had just finished.

"I'm not that good at drawing Bofur." I apologized lamely.

"Give it a try lass." He said smiling.

Well, I did. And strangely enough it took me one hour of intense concentration to finally hurt myself with the tool and swear loudly. Bofur laughed loudly when he heard me and I silently cursed him.

"I didn't know you swore like a miner lass. I'll tell Dori, he's in for a surprise."

"Bofur…" I groaned in warning.

The dwarves' intricate design was oddly more complicated than my little leaves. Mostly because with the leaves I just had to do small, little cuts on the metal, whereas the dwarvish pattern needed long lines that crisscrossed in a complicated manner. It required me to put an equal and constant pressure on the tool while drawing the pattern.

I didn't count the amount of time the tool had just ripped on the plate. And now it had just ripped from the plate to the pad of my thumb.

My yelp and shout had obviously alerted the cousins that something not quite right was going on and they soon were around me, looking at my bleeding thumb and the pitiful excuse for a plate I had made.

"Well, I guess it's not really a job for you then…" Bofur simply shrugged, still smirking, and I glared at him.

"You sure?" I asked sweetly, gritting my teeth.

"Unless you want to spend quite a lot of time training first." He simply replied, smiling once more.

I sighed deeply and let my head rest on the table. I didn't want to train for another job, I just wanted to spend some time doing something, anything really, to occupy my mind.

Bofur patted my shoulder.

"Don't worry lass, I'm sure we'll find something for you to do."

Apparently Bofur understood quite well why I didn't want to go back to the healing wards. I was glad for his show of support. Even Bombur had tried to help me even though we mostly saw each other during meal times and he usually was busy eating.

I glanced up when I heard Bifur say something in Khuzdul. I glanced at Bofur who looked at his cousin as if he was really mad.

"Why would you say that?" Bofur said.

I looked at Bifur who shook his head and crossed his arms on his chest. Then he spoke several words and I looked back at Bofur. It was quite strange really to follow a discussion with Bifur speaking Khuzdul and Bofur a language I understood.

"That's ridiculous. It's a bad idea Bifur." Bofur replied.

"What is?" I intervened before Bifur could answer.

"Well Bifur was just giving his opinion on what you could do." Bofur shrugged.

"So?"

"So what?" Bofur asked me.

"Bofur, what's Bifur's idea. I'm intrigued." I explained a bit exasperated, my little cut already forgotten.

"He said you could follow the merchants' caravans."

* * *

><p>"That is out of the question."<p>

I just knew he would say that. There was just no way Dori would agree with me about this and I knew I would have to battle to do it. Still I thought Bifur had a marvellous idea.

"Oh, Dori. Please, it'd be amazing. I could go with you too, like this you'll know I'll be safe. Please. It's the only idea I have." I almost begged at this point.

"Amelia, roads are dangerous and women just don't go with the caravans." He shook his head sternly.

"Dori, we're not going to have that discussion again are we? Please, it'd be great, I'll obey everything you say while on the road. I'll hide my hair and face too. And I'm a good diplomat."

"Amelia, every time you left the Halls, you ended up being hurt. I don't want that to happen again."

That was low. It hadn't been my fault. Still I couldn't be angry at him for worrying about me, could I?

"I know." I winced. "But it'd be different this time. I'd be with you and I trust you more than any other dwarves."

"That's not the point. If we're attacked by a pack of orcs, you'd be defenceless. The same if bandits try to ambush us." He shook his head.

"Then teach me to fight."

"What? No. Just no!"

"What do you want me to do then? Waste away in the caves? Come on Dori, I'm sure I can do it. Teach me not to kill, but just to defend myself. Like this I could follow you. Please Dori, I don't want to stay here all the time. "

Strangely enough, Nori kept silent. I had been certain that he would at some point participate in the discussion, but until now he was sitting in a chair with his pipe on his lips. Ori was there too but his silence was less surprising. Still I had hoped he would help me convince Dori it'd be a good idea to occupy me. I was certain I would greatly enjoy being travelling with Dori, maybe even Nori and Ori.

The major problem with that idea was that Dori was against it. He didn't even seem ready to make any compromises of any kind. At this rate I'd grew old in Thorin's Halls without ever seeing anything except the mountains and that blasted town I had been to. Well there had been that first town as well but any way, they were both close to the mountain.

"You know."

I startled at hearing Nori's voice and turned to him, my hopes high.

"It's not a good idea."

And there went my hopes…

What had I expected? Nori was even more protective of me than Dori was sometimes.

I sighed deeply and looked at the dwarf.

"I don't understand why you're so stubborn about this. Don't you think it'd be a better idea to agree with me and help me prepare for the outside? Do you actually believe I'd stay here all my life without ever asking to go out?"

They didn't answer and Nori averted his eyes, looking back in the hearth frowning. I groaned and strode to the door.

"Where are you going?" Ori asked, surprised to see me leave.

"Don't worry, I got your map." I simply answered without looking behind me.

I started to walk aimlessly, wondering if there would be any dwarf around who would be at least slightly agreeing with me. Most of the dwarves I knew were just like Dori and Nori; over protective and too stubborn for their own good. I knew Bofur didn't agree with this idea, though Bifur would support me.

The problem was that I couldn't really ask Bifur for help with this matter. First we couldn't communicate with one another, second I had the feeling most of the other dwarves thought him a bit crazy. To be honest I wasn't certain he wasn't.

Bombur would probably side with his brother and I couldn't picture Dís or Danà trying to teach me how to fight, though I couldn't be sure. My relation with Dwalin and Gloin were strained since the whole town debacle, even though they had apologized. At any rate we had never been that close any way. Oin would probably not understand what I said, and if he did, I was certain he would tell me it was a bad idea and that I was a healer.

I thought about Balin then, the older dwarf was my second guardian after all and I should probably ask him about such things too. But something told me he would just react like Dori did. The old dwarf was so sweet and nice with me, and he had been so hurt and worried after learning what I had been forced to do. No I couldn't see him agree with me going in the wild again, and much less me learning to fight.

The way I saw it only a particularly cheeky or reckless dwarf would believe it could be a good idea to follow me on this.

Then it struck me.

I knew two extremely cheeky and mischievous dwarves that I could bet were ready to teach me how to fight. They owed me any way and I had no qualms reminding them of that little fact.

I smirked and wondered where I could find them at such a time.

I took the map Ori had made for me and looked at it, as if the names of the dwarves I was looking for would magically appear on it. Well I wasn't that lucky.

As my eyes wandered on the paper, I remember an old discussion I had once with Ori. Smirking I put a finger on the place I wanted to go to.

* * *

><p>It didn't take me long per se to find the forges. It was quite easy really, with the map, the noise and the horrible heat that was generated by the huge furnaces. What did take me some time though was to find the courage to ask a passing dwarf whether he knew where to find the brothers I was looking for.<p>

I had been sufficiently stupid in the past to know that I wouldn't be welcomed if I were to enter the forges' area without a dwarf to guide me. That was, with the mines, possibly the most dangerous area of Thorin's Halls. I knew that.

It took me some time but finally a dwarf spotted me next to the wall and came to ask me what I was doing there. He knew me obviously as the 'human ward' and was all in all quite nice with me.

"Oy lass, what are you doing here?" a gruff voice said, startling me.

"Hem, hi. I just. I'm looking for someone, and I think they might be in there." I pointed to the forges. "But I don't think I should go in by myself." I smiled softly.

The dwarf had a very nice black beard with two large beads separating it in two equal parts.

"Sure you shouldn't go in there alone. It's dangerous." He said with his gravelly voice.

"Would you mind showing me where they are? I would be extra careful."

"Sure you would." He chuckled at that. "I'm Thàlir, at your service milady."

"Amelia, at yours." I bowed my head, used to this kind of greetings now.

"Come then, missy Amelia. Who's this dwarf you're looking for?"

"Well, there's two of them really. Fili and Kili, I've been told they usually work in the forges when they aren't training."

"Sure they are. The lads aren't bad either."

When we entered the area of the forges, after passing through a long corridor and massive doors, I suddenly had difficulties breathing and the heat made me sweat almost immediately. How could the dwarves work in this suffocating atmosphere all day long? It was horrible, I felt like I had stepped in hell. It didn't stop me though and I looked around with wide, amazed eyes.

The furnaces were just massive and I could see dwarves alimenting huge hearths with wood. Further away some of them were manipulating melted and glowing metal with leather gloves for only protection. It was both madness and simply breathtaking.

"How…" I couldn't formulate words.

At that moment I saw huge hammers fall on a dwarf but he didn't dodge. The hammers' booming clank resonated through my very bones. The dwarf was alright to my utter amazement and started working once more on a piece of metal that had been slightly flattened by the hammers.

I felt my jaw go slack. This was incredible. I couldn't believe my eyes.

"That impressed missy?" Thàlir chuckled, waking me from my daze.

"How can you work in there? How can you… it's just so…"

Yep, my brain had just disconnected.

But let's be honest, it was not something I had ever had the possibility to see before. I could see trails and chariots with rocks and metal in them rolling towards the furnaces. I could see enormous hammers that loudly banged and clanked to mould the metal into various shapes. There were hearths as well that were separated from the main furnaces and were used by the smiths when they shaped and forged tools. Close to them I could see basins full of some liquid that would sizzle each time a dwarf would plunge red hot metal into it.

Thàlir remained close to me and at some point even took my arm in his wide, calloused hand. He let me observe around and gave me some time to adjust to the sounds, smells, and atmosphere down here.

Smoke coated the ceiling and the heat was almost unbearable.

After several minutes though Thàlir tugged lightly on my arm and kindly told me.

"Come missy, the lads aren't far. They're working on weapons today."

"Oh…"

I dumbly followed the dwarf while he guided me towards another area and I finally saw the two dwarves I was looking for; they were not far from another group of smiths. Alright, I had to admit it, my eyes widened some more at the sight that greeted me. Most of those dwarves were working with their chests bare, damp with sweat and you could easily see their muscles roll under the efforts they put in throwing the hammers on the metal they were forging. And they really had nicely shaped upper body muscles.

Alright, I had to be objective and honest for a second…

…That was quite a sight.

Thankfully my blush could be attributed to the heat in the forges.

Fili and Kili had just stopped working and were apparently discussing something together and Thàlir called them.

"Oy lads, the missy's looking for ya."

They both looked at me at the same time and when they smiled, it was easy to recognize them as brothers. The two of them, even though they didn't really look alike, had this same toothy grin at the moment. I couldn't help but smile right back at them. My presence though, had been noticed by the other unoccupied smiths and they all gathered around the three of us while Fili and Kili greeted me.

"Amelia! How are you?" Fili asked kindly.

"Meli! I'm glad to see you're alright!" Kili exclaimed joyously.

They didn't give me time to answer them and they were already talking some more.

"I'm sorry for what happened with uncle, I really didn't think back then it would cause you so much trouble." Kili's joy had almost instantly disappeared.

"Are you truly alright after everything that happened?" Fili asked seriously

"I heard you were behind yesterday's food battle too!" Kili then chuckled, once more happily.

"What?"

At his words, the other smiths came closer to us still and I was left standing there, mouth open to answer but not having the time to because Fili and Kili when together just bounced from one topic to another too quickly.

The other dwarves' intervention though gave me some time to finally answer.

"Hey, yes yesterday's dishes were recipes I used to make with my aunt." At that I heard curious whispers around me and I smiled, maybe they weren't entirely disdainful of my dishes.

"It's something as a traditional dish and another rather popular one. I am truly sorry it caused such an issue. No worries though, I'm not working in the kitchen anymore." I said with a small smile, Kili laughed heartily at that.

"Why don't you work in the healing wards anymore?" Thàlir then asked with a deep frown.

"Eh…I'm sorry, what?" I wasn't expecting that.

I was surprised to see Fili and Kili come closer to me in a protective gesture.

"You saved one of my cousins some months ago, Balir. He was going to die and you saved him. Master Oin said he couldn't have done so. Why would you quit being a healer if you're so good?"

At his words I felt a lump in my throat. Still I felt obliged to answer when I saw the dwarves around nod and voice their opinions. All in all, they had heard of my doings in the wards and wanted to know why I wasn't there.

"Well…" I hesitated and they all were suddenly silent, waiting for my answer.

I glimpsed at Kili and he looked torn. Obviously he knew exactly what had happened and what had been said. Fili did too. It would have been stupid of me to believe the contrary. Kili caught my glance and tried to smile encouragingly at me. That alone made me smile. Kili was a nice dwarf, if a bit over enthusiastic and tiring at times. Fili then nodded at me and smiled too and I decided to explain, briefly and vaguely, what had happened.

"I went with Master Balin on some diplomatic mission that didn't go so well. At some point I had to do something that wasn't ethical. And then…on my second mission some other things occurred." Was I making any sense? "I don't regret doing any of it, but it is just hard for me to go back being a healer as if nothing had happened. So right now I'm trying to do other things to keep my mind occupied while I sort my thoughts out."

I took a deep breath as I stopped talking. I really wasn't sure what I said was understandable or logical. I hadn't been ready to speak about it and certainly didn't expect this to happen.

The dwarves started to mumble and grumble between them at that moment and I could tell they weren't convinced by my little speech. From what I could hear, they weren't too happy to hear that one of their few healers, one that had spectacularly saved one of them, to their opinion, wasn't back in the wards.

Fili put his hand on my shoulder then and turned to face the grumbling dwarves.

"Lady Amelia first saved many of our kin during her very first mission. She had to perform acts she thought to be dishonourable to help them. And then, during her second mission, she had to kill someone, a man, for the first time in order to save me even though she set her life to healing people." He declared.

"Fili!" I exclaimed, shocked he would say that so casually. I was a bit skittish about it all.

I didn't like the fact that he would present the events in such a way; it wasn't as if I had consciously decided to save him. It wasn't a heroic act either. It was a bloody murder and it was a crime. It was morally inacceptable, for me at least, and I didn't appreciate that he would talk about it so casually. At that though, all the dwarves around had turned silent. They seemed to observe me in a different way now. My eyes widened when they simply nodded gravely and turned away. Some of them though decided to let me know their thoughts.

"We hope you'll soon be fine milady."

"You're a good lass."

Thàlir was the last one to remain with me and the two brothers.

"I didn't know 'bout that missy. I'm sorry to hear you were forced into danger. Don't worry, if we have to, we'll eat more of those weird cakes and meat if it helps you going back to the wards."

At that he nodded at me and turned back to leave the forges. I was flabbergasted. I looked at his retreating back with my mouth slightly open and entirely too surprised to realize that Kili was chuckling lightly about it all.

"Are you alright Amelia?" Fili asked, squeezing my shoulder lightly.

"I…huh…" I shook my head to gather my thoughts. "Fili, why did you say all that aloud? Why did you put it like that?"

"Amelia, you know how dwarves care for their women folks. I basically just told them that you hurt yourself in order to save one of their princes. Besides, they will acknowledge that being forced to kill someone is something grave for you. They'll respect you for your strength and loyalty." He explained with a small smile.

"You just got more popular Meli!" Kili joked.

"I don't want to be popular." I glared at him, which made him smile more and added. "Especially not if it's because of something like this."

"Anyway. What are you doing here?" Fili said, obviously trying to change the topic of this discussion. "Surely you're not hoping to work in the forges?" The young dwarf looked slightly scared that I would actually have hoped that.

"No." I immediately saw his relief. "I worked a bit with Bofur and Bifur today and Bifur gave me an idea. I wanted to ask you both if you'd agree to teach me how to defend myself?"

I looked at the both of them, studying their reactions and silently hoping they would agree. They were in all honesty my best shot. If those two didn't agree then I wasn't sure any other dwarf would.

Kili's eyes had widened visibly and he had this look of genuine surprise on his face with his eyebrows raised almost to his hairline. Fili on the other hand was frowning and had crossed his arms on his chest. I had to force my eyes away from the sight. Seriously, couldn't they put on some shirts? Still the blond dwarf seemed to seriously ponder my question and I was glad for that.

"Why do you want to defend yourself? You're safe here."

"Of course I know I'm safe here." I rolled my eyes at Fili's question. "I'd like to follow Dori when he goes with the merchants' caravans, but he won't accept because it'd be too dangerous. And when I asked him to teach me defence techniques, he said I didn't need it."

"Well, I can understand his point of view." Fili said flatly.

"Sure. But can't you see mine too? Fili, I don't want to live my life prisoner under that mountain. I love it here, but I need to move from time to time. And I want to be able to defend myself. I don't want to be weak or helpless. Please, can't you understand I just want to be stronger?"

"I do understand that." Kili finally joined the discussion and earned a frown from his brother.

"Don't misunderstand me, I don't want to learn to fight, just some techniques that would allow me to survive were I to find myself in a battle of some kind."

He didn't look convinced. I could see that in his deepening frown. I then thought about a trump card I might have against him. I lowered my head and let my shoulder slump slightly.

"Remember when we went to that town with Bofur? I felt so useless then. It was pure luck I killed that man before he killed you. What if a similar situation happens and I don't know how to react? I couldn't live with myself if someone were to die because of me."

I had said that in a very low voice and I glimpsed slightly up to see a wide smirk on Kili's lips. He looked rather pleased. Then I glanced towards Fili and I saw a little smirk at the corner of his mouth too.

"You little..." He started before he shook his head, still I could hear the laugh in his voice. "In two sentences you remind me I owe you and that it could really be useful for everyone that you learn some basic stuff. You're damn good."

I straightened and shrugged with a little smile on my lips now.

"So, does that mean you'll help?"

"Aye, we'll help you alright. When can we meet to start our lessons?" Fili said with a smile.

"Hem, when you want, but I'd rather Dori and Nori didn't know. Not yet at least."

"Yeah, that'd be better for you." Fili nodded.

"We could meet later tonight then." Kili suggested and we all agreed to meet after supper.

Kili grabbed his tunic and finally put it on before he escorted me back to the entrance of the forges and we parted with him joking about me not getting lost. He and Fili had been happy to see me use Ori's map, as they had helped him draw it, and they had pointed to me where to meet them that evening.

Later that evening I wondered how I could sneak out with the three dwarves lounging in the living room. I hadn't talk much to them that night. I believed they thought I was upset with them. It was at least partly right. I was a bit upset with their immediate refusal of my idea. But it wasn't only that. Actually I kept silent mostly because I really didn't want the brothers to know about my projects and I didn't trust myself to keep it from them.

Still as time passed I realized I would have to leave soon if I wanted to be able to meet with Fili and Kili. At some point I simply decided to stand up and I walked to the door. I felt their gazes follow me and as I opened the door, Ori spoke.

"Where are you going?"

"I just want to go for a walk. Don't worry, I have your map and I won't leave the Halls."

I didn't give them time to answer and scurried away, jogging to the point that Kili had indicated on the map.

"Ah! There you are!" I heard Kili exclaim.

"Hey, sorry if I'm late."

"T'is fine Amelia. Come, let's go to the training ground. There shouldn't be anyone there at that time."

I smiled at the two brothers as they guided me to large double doors that opened on an armoury. I looked at the impressive display of axes, spears, knives, daggers, swords, hammers and other weapons I didn't know the names of. I had been so busy looking around that I hadn't seen the brothers crossing the room to another set of doors.

"Come Meli, we're not going to use weapons tonight." Kili called me.

"What's the plan then?" I asked genuinely curious.

In the meantime we had entered a very large room with benches along the walls. Except for those benches, the room was completely bare.

"Well, first we have to agree on what you want to learn." Fili said, always more serious than his brother.

"As I said, I don't want to know any fancy stuff. I just want to be able to defend myself."

"What do you know already?" Kili asked me.

"Nothing."

They stared at me for a while before looking at each other. They seemed to hesitate now and I really couldn't let them give up before we even started.

"Oh, guys, please. You said you'll help me. Don't make me remind you why you accepted."

Fili smirked and Kili smiled at that and then the youngest one simply crouched before sitting on the floor still smiling.

"So?" I asked.

"We'll help but you have to trust us and do as we say."

"As long as it isn't stupid I'm alright with that rule."

"Fine." Fili nodded his smirk still in place.

"So, with what do we start?"

"Run."

* * *

><p>And run I did.<p>

It had been two weeks now and every evening I'd leave the three brothers to meet with Fili and Kili. I was exhausted every time I came back and slept like a log every night. At least I had the time to relax during the day as the only job Bofur and Bifur gave me was to paint some of their toys.

My training until now mostly consisted in me running circles in the training room while Fili and Kili discussed together, sometimes they sparred against each other too and for two nights now they had started to show me basic evasive movements. Those were rather simple, still as Fili put it, they could very well save my life if I had the reflex to use them.

Thus for two nights in a row I had run, because my first reaction should be to run Kili had said, and then they had showed me how to duck and jump to evade some attacks.

It was all rather fun, despite my muscles screaming in protest for being put to use after 25 years of holidays.

According to the two brothers, running would help me gain endurance, which I needed badly. As it all made sense I didn't complain and simply ran. Though if I were honest, I wasn't lasting long…at all.

That evening when I came back after having taken a quick cold bath to wash away the sweat, I expected to find the living room empty, just like I had the previous nights. I came in gingerly, trying not to make noise, happy to be finally close to my bed. I really wanted to go to sleep right now. I didn't bother to try and light a candle. I knew the setting of the room and knew I shouldn't find any obstacles, and the slight light of the embers in the hearth was enough to let me see shapes.

That was entirely not surprising in such conditions that I couldn't help but squeak when Nori popped out of nowhere in front of me.

"Are you mad?!" I whispered angrily at him. "You almost gave me a heart attack!"

At first Nori didn't say a word, he kept staring at me intensely and he took a step to get closer to me. I felt myself blush, which was weird because I had no reason to blush. It was Nori for god's sake. I was used to be in his arms. Strangely enough the thought of being held by him worsened my blush. What was going on with me?

I didn't have time to question my body's reactions further because Nori finally decided to speak.

"Where are you going every night?" he whispered, his voice strangely toneless.

"I told you, I'm walking around." I mumbled.

"Amelia…"

"I am doing nothing that you should be concerned about Nori!" I whispered, looking up at him and meeting his grey eyes.

I realized at that moment that we were really pretty close, and that he was really upset about something. He was good at hiding his feelings and his face was blank, but I had become quite good myself at discerning what he hid. I wouldn't say I could see it every time, but that evening it was obvious that something disturbed him greatly. Hurt him even.

"Mizimul, are you…" He seemed to hesitate which was entirely odd for him. "Are you seeing…meeting someone?" His voice had become quite soft.

"I…I…" I didn't know why but I couldn't answer.

Somehow I couldn't lie to him, not to Nori, and I couldn't tell him I wasn't meeting anyone. But something told me that there was another meaning at his question. I kept observing him and I saw a flash of hurt in his eyes as he averted them to look at nothing really, just anywhere except me.

As I observed him in silence I tried to repeat his words in my mind. I frowned and finally asked.

"Are you asking me if I'm meeting a suitor?"

I saw him tense but he didn't answer.

"I am not meeting anyone with that in mind Nori." I whispered and I saw him frown some more.

"It isn't proper for you to be out at such time, meeting dwarves and coming back so late." He grumbled.

"Oy, don't talk to me about what's proper or not, cheeky thief." I said jokingly and regretted my word when he tensed some more.

"Mizimul…"

"Nori, I swear I'm not doing anything dangerous or reprehensible. Really I'm not. Trust me, please?"

Nori remained silent for awhile and in the end he briskly turned away from me and went back to his room. He left me alone in the dark and I felt my heart clench. As cliché as it sounded, I felt as if someone had just stabbed me in the chest. I didn't understand those reactions. Still they were most annoying and unwelcomed.

I slowly, sadly made my way to my room, thinking about Nori and wondering what was upsetting him so.

* * *

><p>During the evenings, Fili and Kili mostly made me run to the point of exhaustion and then only they would start showing me some hand to hand combat technique. It truly felt like they were beating me for fun sometimes, but in all honesty I knew they were going easy on me, extremely easy. So it was nothing new when that evening, Fili and Kili decided to try a little spar against me after I had run what felt like hundreds of laps around the training ground. I was already tired and a part of me wanted nothing but to go to my bed, but the other bigger and highly motivated part of my brain was actually enjoying this.<p>

I was facing Kili at the moment. We were circling each other and I really didn't like the little smirk on his face. Until now I mostly knew how to dodge attacks and how to convert one opponent's force against him, for example pushing him so his momentum would make him fall. I felt that Kili was about to attack when I saw something I didn't expect from the corner of my eyes.

Completely frozen, I didn't react at all when Kili decided to send a kick in my stomach. Had I been alert, I would have evaded this easily. Distracted as I was though, I took the hit in the stomach with a yelp and felt all the air leave my lungs. I ended up on my back, coughing and gasping while I looked straight at the subject of my distraction.

"Mahal, you're more stubborn than a dwarf."

* * *

><p><strong>AN: Hi everyone! Thanks for reading and reviewing! It's always amazing to receive a little comment :) I'm really glad you enjoyed the last chapter and I hope you liked this one too.**

**So as always, Thanks to the amazing readers/reviewers/followers! Without you all, this story would be in my mind only. ;)**

**As you can see I'm offering Amelia some peaceful chapters. But I wanted to show a bit more of the halls, i'm not sure i did a good job with the forges though. I didn't want to go into a long and complicated description.**

**I know this chapter is shorter than the previous one, but you understand why i cut it here. ;) **

**I should be able to post the next one saturday.**


	27. A Training Day to Remember

**Everything belongs to JRR Tolkien, except for my OC and the plot.**

* * *

><p>That kick in the stomach had hurt. Really. Sure I wasn't really used to being kicked, but still. I was fighting hard to get any air back in my lungs while trying to forget about the dull pain where Kili had hit me. At any rate right now the fact that I was coughing loudly and gasping for air were just mere details compared to the really important matter.<p>

My teary eyes stared at him while he made his way towards me.

In a few quick strides, Nori had come to the centre of the room and was now kneeling next to me, frowning deeply. I saw him glare at Kili and I managed to think straight enough to grab his forearm and stop the harsh comments he was about to snarl. His eyes immediately turned back to me. His anger was still brewing behind the grey orbs, but it was easy to see he was mostly concerned. He helped me sit back without saying anything.

His silence was rather unnerving. Especially as I could see in his tense shoulders and deep frown, that he wanted nothing else than to loudly complain. Fili had come closer too and he was standing near Kili. The poor dwarf looked quite upset and I didn't know whether it was because he had hit me rather strongly or because of Nori's fierce glare.

"I'm sorry Meli, I really thought you'd dodge it." Kili said pitifully.

"I'm…fine." I said between two gulps of air. "I was just surprised."

"What's the meaning of this?" Nori groaned.

"Well…" Fili seemed to hesitate, looking uncertainly at Nori. "Amelia asked us to help her learn some self-defence."

"And I could see how efficient those lessons were." Nori growled.

Fili and Kili both seemed to shrink on the spot. During a second I couldn't help but be impressed at the effects an angry Nori could have on them both. Honestly I believed Nori was rather scary when he was angry. But right now I didn't want him to scare away the only dwarves who had agreed to teach me defence. I wanted to learn those things. I needed those lessons and I found it somehow oddly enjoyable.

Nori meanwhile was still glaring at Fili and Kili. I rolled my eyes and slapped him on the forearm. His eyes immediately came back to observe my face and I attempted to smile, albeit quite sheepishly.

"I'll let you know I was doing quite well until you showed up." I managed to say.

"That's true!" Kili piped in.

"And I'm glad they accepted to help me."

"Amelia, we talked about this already." Nori sighed, shaking his head.

"No we didn't. Not really. You guys decided I shouldn't learn anything. I don't agree with you and I don't mean to offend you but I'm sure the women around aren't as defenceless as you make them seem. Maybe I should ask Dís and Danà then?" I stubbornly stared at him, one eyebrow arched.

"It's different, they had no other choices. You don't need to learn that. You're safe here." He sighed.

"But I want to! I need to! Please Nori…"

I looked at his grey eyes while I tried to plead my case. I really couldn't believe that Nori wouldn't understand me. After all he was a thief and had become one because he wanted, needed to find something. It was similar to my situation in my mind. I didn't ask to be taught for fun, it was entirely logical for me that I should at least be knowledgeable about basic defence tactics.

I had witnessed the harsh reality of this world. I had done and seen things I would rather forget at the moment. I felt like I couldn't honestly remain a healer. Not after having killing someone and poisoned others. But those were only feelings. Those feelings were linked to an ideal and sets of moral rules that came from my previous world. My mind on the other hand was telling me that I was being stupid. If I analyzed my acts with logic and considered the world I was in, it was easy to understand that I shouldn't be upset at all. My inability to reconcile my mind and my feelings was rather annoying though.

I needed to clear those thoughts away. I wanted to forget about all this for awhile. And that was another reason why I didn't want to work in the healing wards for now. If I were to stay there, I would be daily reminded of this internal fight. I didn't want that. Learning self-defence, going out with Dori, those were things I could do that would help me move forward. While I fought against Kili I didn't think about anything else except the fight. When I ran, I let my mind wander. And I knew that if I were to go out with Dori, first I would be as safe as possible, and second I would be able to think about other things too.

I could still remember how my uncle always insisted that fresh air was always good for the troubled mind. It had then become a habit of his to force me out of my room when I was a child and was upset. He would oblige me to follow him in the garden or even sometimes in the park, and we would just walk or garden. He wouldn't necessarily talk. He wasn't a man of many words. But his calming presence and maybe the fresh air too, always seemed to appease my troubled mind. And anyway my aunt would prepare homemade hot chocolate for when we would come back and that was something anyone should enjoy once in awhile.

Shaking those memories away, I concentrated some more on the situation at hand. Nori was still frowning deeply and I saw he was about to speak. I didn't give him any time to do so.

"Nori, I really think it'd be better for all of us." I whispered. "I'm not going to run into danger, but at least if some comes my way, I'd be better prepared. Don't you think it'd be safer for me if at least I know how to evade attacks and kick back enough to play for time or even escape?"

I kept looking straight in his eyes and it allowed me to see the concern and worries, as well as the doubt that my words started to instil in him. His brows were furrowed and I knew he was thinking about my words. At that moment Fili cleared his throat behind me and decided to participate in the short debate.

"Maybe we could show you what we taught her so far."

"Yes!" Kili added. "We didn't do much, but still she's already showing some progress."

"After what I saw already, I'm not sure it will convince me lads." Nori groaned and I decided to intervene.

"I told you, you distracted me. You weren't supposed to be there. Please, let me show you. They're teaching me exactly what I want to learn. Like this you can see and give your opinion."

I observed Nori who was obviously battling against himself. It was clear that he really didn't want me to fight, even in a spar. He looked at the three of us and I was glad to see he was really thinking about it. It made me happy to see him actually ponder on this and not simply refusing to discuss. It showed me how much he cared; he was respecting the promise he had made so long ago. He trusted me, even though it went against his instincts to even think about letting me fight.

Somehow it warmed my heart to see him honestly pondering on this.

"Alright." He mumbled. "Show me what you did so far."

I resisted the impulse to squeak happily and hug him when I heard those words, I settled to smile broadly at Nori who simply stood up and went a few steps back. His face was set in a deep frown as he leant on the wall. His arms were crossed on his chest and his eyes were observing us.

"Alright, well." Kili started, rubbing his hands. "What should we show him first?

"Maybe we could start by the simple moves we taught you, how to avoid punches and block attacks." Fili answered his brother while looking at me with a quirked eyebrow.

"Sure." I said feeling lump in my throat.

It was somehow different to do this with Nori being there to observe it.

"Remember what we told you. Use your elbows. Deflect the blows and keep moving at all time." Fili advised me quickly.

"I'll spar with you, alright?"

I simply nodded at Kili and rubbed my sweaty palms on my thighs. I was growing nervous at the idea that Nori was going to observe and analyze my every move. I had to show him we weren't doing anything overly dangerous and that it would be useful for me to know such techniques. It was a piece of cake, right? I just had to spar like I had done several times already. Nori would easily see how useful those lessons were. He would realize that I wasn't going to be hurt that much and that he didn't need to stop me.

As I looked at the floor I felt as if a huge stone had fallen on my stomach. It suddenly felt impossible to demonstrate all that to an overprotective and stubborn dwarf.

I glanced at Kili who simply smiled encouragingly at me. Nodding at him I let him know I was as ready as could be. Fili had walked to Nori and was now standing next to him. He offered me a smile and gestured for us to start.

"Alright"

I muttered under my breath and observed Kili who slowly made his way towards me. He was circling me and I repeated in my head the advices and tips that the brothers had given me. I kept my eyes firmly on Kili, mirroring his moves, trying to always face him. My knees were slightly bent and I was ready to jump in any direction if the need arose.

After a short lull in our movements, Kili jumped towards me, his right arm raised to strike at my face. Adrenaline started to pump in my veins and I jumped quickly back, raising both my hands in order to defend myself. When Kili followed me and tried to punch me with his left hand, I deflected his blow with my elbow, wincing at the pain that shot up my arm.

It didn't stop either of us though and as he was already readying himself to attack me once more. I quickly crouched enough to side jump under his arm and quickly evaded him by running a few steps away. Obviously Kili wasn't really fighting me. We both knew I had no chance to stand up against him for more than a few seconds. But right now the point was to train me and allow me to learn a few tricks and techniques that might help me win some time. So that was exactly what I did, escaping his blows, running away, jumping on the sides and away from him.

I didn't pay any attention to Fili and Nori. My mind was entirely focused on Kili and his arms. At some point though, when we were close enough to one another, Kili called to me.

"I'm going to use the legs too. Alright?"

I simply nodded, bracing myself for what was to come. Fili and Kili had only started to show me how to evade kicks that very evening. And quite obviously I wasn't too good at it. Still I was glad he had alerted me in this change of rules. I knew it wouldn't happen in a real fight, not even in a real spar, but we weren't aiming for that.

The first kick he threw my way, I managed to jump away. But as he kept on alternating between kicks and punches, I was quickly overwhelmed and in a mere minute I was lying on my back on the floor, wincing. I did wonder for a second how I had ended there. My mind seemed to have trouble remembering whether this last blow was a kick or a punch. It didn't really matter but still, it was unsettling to realize I couldn't quite remember the exact events that had lead me to lie on my back on the floor.

I would probably be covered in bruises by the morning but I didn't mind. If it was what it took to learn and not be utterly defenceless anymore, then I truly didn't care about the colour of my skin or the soreness of my muscles.

Dear lord, was I really sounding as stubborn as a dwarf right now?

These men were really rubbing on me and I probably should be a tad scared about the potential result it would have.

At the moment though, I was more interested in Nori's opinion of our little lesson. Fili and Nori quickly came towards me while Kili helped me stand again, pulling me back on my feet. I winced once more and gingerly moved my arms and shoulders. Nothing seemed broken or torn. That was good news. It didn't mean I wasn't hurting all over though.

"You alright?" Kili asked me.

"Yeah, I'm fine. Don't worry." I replied, tense while I waited to hear Nori's decision.

Fili smiled at me and winked, putting his thumb up to show me I didn't do too badly during our little show. Nori was frowning and didn't say a word. He observed me and I felt unnerved by the seriousness on his face.

"Are you hurt?" He asked gruffly.

"Nori I…" I couldn't finish because he interrupted me.

"Are you hurt? Yes or no."

I sighed and looked straight at him before answering honestly.

"Yes. It does hurt to fall repeatedly on the floor or to receive blows in your arms and legs. But I feel fine, I'm just…sore."

I told him the truth, and was now feeling utterly defeated. I was convinced that he wouldn't let me continue with my training. I saw him nod, a deep frown still marring his features.

"You're too slow. Too small as well. You have no muscles whatsoever. You can't fight. Not like this."

I felt my shoulders slump and my heart fell in the pit of my stomach. I was really disappointed. I had failed in showing him what I could do. Worse still, he thought I wasn't even able to train. This was really disheartening. From the corner of my eyes I saw Fili and Kili were about to protest and defend me, but it didn't lift my mood. Nori didn't even let them speak.

"You can't train as a warrior. You should emphasize on endurance, speed. Better dodge than deflect."

I glanced up at that. Nori was still frowning and he wasn't looking at me. I caught a glimpse of Fili and Kili and they seemed suddenly less tensed. Looking back at Nori I arched an eyebrow and waited for him to finally give his opinion.

After several minutes of silence he sighed and I had to fight against myself to avoid jumping everywhere. I wanted to usher him a bit, I hated how he played with my nerves, though I doubted he did it voluntarily or consciously.

"Fine." He said somewhat reluctantly. "You might be right. But you'll have to be properly trained then, with real masters."

"Oy." Kili complained.

"And it won't be a few hours every evening either. If you're going to train, it's every day in the mornings and afternoons. We'll come and talk with Gloin tomorrow."

"So you'll help me convince Dori?" I asked undeniably happy.

"I can't say he'll agree about your idea of following him, but we might convince him that basic training could do you good."

"Oh thanks Nori, you're amazing!" I exclaimed.

My body acted on its own then and I realized what I had done only when it was too late. In my joy I had launched myself into Nori's arms, snaking my arms around his shoulder and hugging him tightly. My heart skipped a beat when I felt his arms encircle my waist loosely and I couldn't help but smile widely. I felt an immense joy blossom in my heart as my arms tightened their hold on him.

The moment had to be broken by the other two though and Kili cleared his throat loudly before asking me.

"Why didn't we get hugs when we accepted to help you?" He teased.

I disentangled myself from Nori and faced the dark haired dwarf who had a smug smirk on his face.

"Because I actually had to coerce you into doing it and besides you were both horribly sweaty at the time."

"Coerce them?" Nori asked making Fili smirk.

"She reminded me she saved my life…quite sneakily too."

I blushed, slightly uneasy about that little stunt. It wasn't really honest and definitely not honourable. Nori surprised me though by chuckling lightly and shaking his head in disbelief. He soon recovered though and he furrowed his brow rather suddenly.

"And what about that sweaty part?"

"Well she came to meet us in the forges…" Kili started before Nori interrupted him.

"What? You went to the forges alone?" His gaze turned to me once more, reprimanding.

"No, I didn't. I asked a dwarf to guide me in. I'm not stupid." I scoffed.

He narrowed his eyes at me and I glared right back at him. After a short while though he looked at the other two and simply asked them if they could meet with us in the morning so that they'd explain to Gloin what we'd done so far and what they'd thought of my aptitudes.

After those short words were exchanged we all went back our separate ways. As we started to make our way towards our home, I frowned a bit and turned toward Nori.

"By the way…why did you come here tonight?"

He didn't look at me and scratched his neck a bit. He clearly didn't want to answer that. I frowned some more and tried to find a logical reason that would explain such a coincidence. When I couldn't find any I had to admit one thing. It might not have been a coincidence. I stopped dead in my tracks then.

After a few steps Nori turned to face me, a questioning look on his face.

I crossed my arms and stared at him, slightly annoyed.

"Nori, how come you were here tonight at the exact same time as us?"

"Amelia…"

"Did you follow me?" I asked, not listening to him.

His silence was enough. He averted his eyes and I sighed deeply. It hurt. Not much but it hurt.

"Don't you trust me at all?" I murmured.

His eyes immediately found mine and he stepped forward before placing a hand on my shoulder.

"I trust you Mizimul. I just…" He seemed to hesitate and I was about to push him away when he talked. "I can't help it. I was worried. I had to make sure you were alright."

It halted my moves completely. Then I slowly raised a hand to place it on top of his, on my shoulder.

"You won't always be able to be here Nori." I whispered.

He took several long seconds, maybe even a minute before he answered. He was looking at me, a mix of hurt and concern in his eyes. My chest seemed suddenly a bit too tight and I had some trouble breathing but I didn't care much. I was completely focused on Nori. My personal problems were put aside for the moment. Finally he squeezed my shoulder slightly and spoke.

"And that's why I agreed with you about training lessons."

I smiled softly.

I wasn't offended at all about him following me. Sure it was odd, but well, Nori was a thief after all. Those kind of sneaky ways were somehow expected of him. And beside how could I be angry at him when he wanted to protect me? I nodded a bit and he slowly let go of my shoulder. It took me a few seconds to realize my hand hadn't left his and I reluctantly let go. Then he turned back and started to walk. Quickly I followed him.

Nori and I walked silently for a short while and after several minutes I asked him in a whisper.

"How's your wrist?"

"Much better." He answered simply.

"So you're leaving soon then."

It hadn't been a question since I already knew the answer. Nori didn't reply and kept his gaze on the floor, frowning slightly. I didn't know what was bothering him and I wouldn't ask. I knew he wouldn't answer me any way; Nori usually found a way to distract me and almost never answered my questions, or at least the personal ones.

"I'll wait for a few days. I'll stay to see how your training starts." He mumbled after some minutes had passed.

I simply nodded and smiled widely at him, my smile grew some more when I saw the familiar happy glint in his grey eyes.

"Thank you Nori. It means a lot that you're agreeing with me on this." I said and was rewarded by a small smirk.

"It doesn't mean I agree with you following Dori though."

"You could come too, you know." I simply shrugged.

He didn't answer to that and we had arrived in front of our home's door. We entered gingerly and I realized then how much Nori was actually used to this. Being sneaky actually seemed entirely natural to him. Damn thief, I smiled at the thought. Dori and Ori were probably already asleep and the apartment was completely dark, save for the embers in the hearth, like always. Before he had stepped too far away from me I grabbed Nori's arm and squeezed it lightly.

"Thanks Nori. I'm really happy about how things turned out."

I didn't say more and I hoped Nori would understand what I meant by that. I was glad I had met them that fateful day. I was glad they had brought me here. I was glad for everything they did and had done. I was glad to be here.

To my surprise one of Nori's hand slid against my cheek and Nori leant slightly. My heart skipped several beats when I realized what was happening. My eyes fluttered close as I felt Nori kindly kiss my brow. His lips lingered slightly on my now tingling skin before he stepped back and whispered.

"Sleep well, Mizimul."

After those three little words, he left the room, disappearing, melting into the shadows.

Suffice is to say that my dreams that night were filled with Nori.

* * *

><p>The following morning I was greeted by the melodious voices of Dori and Nori arguing about me. I sighed and quickly took a seat next to Ori while Nori was trying to explain to his brother why my idea wasn't actually that bad. Obviously Dori wasn't convinced and their discussion started all over again.<p>

"Hey" I whispered to Ori who was eating calmly while listening to his brothers." For how long have they been arguing like that?" I asked while taking a large piece of bread and some cheese.

"I'd say around one hour at least. They had already started when I came in." Ori shrugged.

"Oh…so I guess we won't actually go for another hour?"

"At least."

To say that I was getting used to dwarvish disputes would put it mildly. Dwarves were extremely short tempered and any disagreement would quickly turn into a dispute or a yelling match with them. Still, usually after a few hours they'd calm themselves and either would find a compromise or they would simply leave the room grumbling and growling. I had witnessed such disputes mostly in the markets when I was with Bofur and Danà and they would usually laugh and explain to me what was happening. At some point I had realized that when two dwarves argued, many others would just watch and comment. It was live reality show without having to pay for it.

As Ori and I had predicted, after one more hour of arguing, Dori finally relented and I smiled widely at Nori to express how grateful I was. That morning I had chosen to wear one of my long tunics with breeches and I giddily followed Dori and Nori to the training ground, Ori trailing behind us with his notebook. When we arrived, I was surprised to see so many dwarves currently focused on their trainings.

Yet no one seemed too surprised or shocked to see me here. We walked directly toward Gloin who was talking with Fili and Kili. Nori and Dori went to meet him directly while I took some time to look around. The room was filled with dwarves and I recognized some of them. At the far end of the room I could easily see the bald, tattooed head of Dwalin who was sparing with a young ginger dwarf I recognized as Gimli, Gloin's son.

I was awoken from my daydreaming by Nori who had just come back towards me. He gestured me to follow him and so I did.

"So, Amelia, ready to train?" Gloin's booming voice asked me from afar.

"Sure." I said with a smile.

I would have to admit it; I was feeling a bit nervous. It had been easy to be cheerful and confident when only Fili and Kili had been there to observe me. It was much more difficult to keep that confidence when the room was full of dwarves. Of warriors who knew perfectly well how to fight. I squared my shoulders and walked toward Gloin while trying to put aside the thoughts of all those warriors looking at me. And to top it all I couldn't forget that Dori and Nori where here too, waiting to haul me back home at the slightest sign of me being hurt or tired. Well, I might be exaggerating here, but still, I didn't want them to think I was weak. At least not too weak to follow Dori.

I swallowed thickly and positioned myself in front of Gloin, a few step away of the warrior. I noticed he had a sort of wooden sword in his hand and I wondered what he would do with that. He was aware I didn't have any weapon, right?

"Well, let's see what those two boys have tried to teach you first." He said and quickly came at me.

My eyes widened as I saw him raise his arm, the one holding the wooden sword, and I quickly jumped away. I hadn't made two steps though that a booming voice resonated in the training grounds.

"Stop!"

Surprised, I stumbled and fell backwards, falling heavily on my backside while Gloin was standing a few steps away, arm still raised above his head.

The ginger dwarf blinked at me then looked around.

"What is it?" He groaned and I turned my head to follow the direction of his gaze.

I saw Dori quickly stride in our direction. He didn't look happy. His arms were crossed on his chest and a deep frown marred his face. Nori was shadowing his big brother but his eyes were on me instead of glaring at Gloin. From the corner of my eye I saw that a fourth silhouette had joined Fili, Kili and Gimli at the side of the ground.

"What is it Dori?" Gloin repeated in a growl.

Somehow I did wonder too. If I were honest, I would say I was slightly glad for the interruption. Gloin was intimidating and seeing him ready to strike me with this wooden sword had my heart racing. But still, I was curious about why Dori had interrupted this.

"Are you mad? How can you go at her like that? With a weapon?" Dori was fuming.

"Oy, you said you wanted me to train her."

"Train her, not kill her you dimwit!" Dori snarled.

"Dimwit? Dimwit!" Gloin shouted. "Who are you calling dimwit you hawker!"

"Hawker?! Who do you think you are …"

I tuned them out. I was flabbergasted as I looked around. Nori was standing a few steps behind his brother, arms crossed on his chest, looking fierce, but his eyes were on me. He looked worried which surprised me. Blinking several times to gather my wits, I quickly jumped back to my feet and looked around. No one seemed ready to try and stop the two loud dwarves who had now started to yell at each other about how I shouldn't be hurt or something like this.

I turned toward the younger dwarves and realized that the silhouette I had seen was Ori. I knew he had followed us, but I didn't know he had actually planned to stay and watch me. Quickly I jogged towards the four of them who were all smirking and snorting quietly.

"What is going on here? Didn't you have to go to work today?" I asked Ori.

"Oh…well, I really didn't want to miss your first training session. I have to admit, it's rather fun to witness it all now that I'm not the one trying to train." He answered with a toothy grin.

"What do you mean?" I was stunned and could still hear Gloin and Dori shouts.

"It's exactly like my first training." His smile broadened on his face before he added cheekily. "Good luck Amelia."

Both my eyebrows rose to my hairline and I turned to observe the two elder dwarves. Surely they would soon stop, right? I really hadn't expected Dori to react like that; after all, he knew what training consisted of. He shouldn't have been surprised by anything Gloin would do. Though I had to admit, the whole wooden sword stunt had been unexpected and maybe too much for me.

It took them half an hour before they finally agreed that Gloin wouldn't use the wooden sword anymore, at least not until I was fully capable of fighting hand to hand. I frowned at hearing that though. I thought that Nori had said I should concentrate on other things than pure combat. Well, I shrugged. These dwarves had to know what they were doing, they were the trained warriors after all.

Gloin then told me we would spar without any weapon, repeating what he had just agreed upon with Dori. I nodded. It would probably be something similar to what I had done with the two brothers this time.

It took maybe five minutes for Dori to yell once more. This time he shouted 'stop it!' when Gloin's fist violently connected with my left shoulder. I wouldn't lie, it had hurt. It still did actually, but I resisted the urge to press my hand on it for fear that Dori would react more angrily.

"What did I just told you? Be careful!" He shouted.

"What do you want me to do? Train her or cuddle her?" Gloin replied in a similar tone.

At those words even Nori's face grew grimmer.

"Are you stupid?" Dori growled before starting to speak in Khuzdul. "Rukhsul menu!" He snarled which made Gloin twitch visibly.

From behind me I heard gasps and snorts. I glanced quickly to see Ori smirking, Kili and Fili grinning and Gimli scowling. What had that meant?

"Metun menu rukhas!" Gloin groaned.

I was completely bewildered and I once more found myself turning towards the younger dwarves. This time Gimli was smiling while Ori was scowling. Both Fili and Kili were still enjoying the show. I strode to them and asked no one in particular.

"What is happening now?"

Honestly I was starting to feel a bit desperate at this point. Or at least very annoyed.

"Dori just told him that Gloin was the son of an orc." Kili said, grinning widely.

"What?" I frowned.

What did that mean? It was ridiculous. Why would he insult Gloin? Beside what kind of stupid insult was that? The son of an orc? It was meaningless.

"And Gloin retorted that Dori was dining with orcs." Fili added, eyes glued on the verbal fight.

Alright, this made even less sense. Were they mad? I turned once more to see that they were still yelling. I sighed deeply and jogged to Nori who was standing slightly to the side. Clearly supporting his brother, but not taking any actual part in the dispute. As I walked to him I saw him send me a questioning glance.

"Why don't you stop them?" I whispered to him rather annoyed at my guardian attitude.

"Why should I? Dori's right, Gloin should be more careful." Nori shrugged and then his gaze fell on my still aching shoulder. "Does it still hurt?"

I rolled my eyes at him and scoffed.

"Seriously, I thought I was here to be trained, not to participate in this…circus show." I groaned at Nori who shrugged once more.

I sighed dejectedly. Apparently no one would side with me this time. Well, I guessed I just had to wait. Patience was a virtue. Now was as good a time as any to acquire it.

* * *

><p>In the end the whole morning was spent with Dori and Gloin yelling at each other. In between those verbal jousts, I got maybe all in all half an hour of training.<p>

To say that I was angry, frustrated and disappointed, when the dwarves decided it was time to go and eat, was an understatement. I was really annoyed at my friends for being so impossible. Truly was it so hard to just sit and watch while I was trying my best not to get beaten into a pulp? Apparently it was.

I couldn't even be really angry at Dori because he had been doing this with my well being in mind. Still, we had to do something about his mother hen issues.

During the whole lunch time I didn't utter a word. I didn't answer when Ori asked me questions, and I didn't react when Dori enquired about my well being. I didn't even bat an eyelash when Nori tried to make me smile by telling me funny stories about Ori's first training week.

I was aware that I was pouting and reacting childishly. But at the moment I felt as if the childish people here were the dwarves.

It probably didn't surprise the three brothers when I quickly disappeared after lunch, escaping them to walk aimlessly in the Halls.

I let my mind wander as my feet moved on their own volition. It shouldn't have surprised me when I ended up facing the wooden door leading to the healing wards. I froze though at the sight and I stayed there, looking at it absentmindedly. I couldn't decide whether I should go in or not. How would Oin react at seeing me? Would he be happy? Would he kick me out? Would he care at all? It wasn't helping either that I didn't want them to think that because I was here, it meant that I was ready to start again as a healer.

It wasn't the case.

Being there brought to the front of my mind all my thoughts about this. My decision had probably surprised quite a lot of people, that much had been obvious, and I was certain that not so many of them understood it. I wasn't sure I understood it myself. There was a part of me that had been completely shell shocked when I had realized I had killed someone. There also was a part of me that had been glad, rejoicing in this man bloody death. That had greatly disturbed me.

The epiphany I had about my complete lack of restraint whenever the three brothers were concerned hadn't helped at all.

Since I had come here, in this world, I had changed. I could admit that much. The change had first been harmless; I laughed more, made friends and didn't mind being teased. These sorts of change were completely welcomed because it had made me feel as if I was becoming a better person. And who doesn't try to become better? Who doesn't like having true friends? Who doesn't like to laugh with people instead of being laughed at?

But then I had schemed to poison ignorant villagers. But then I had stabbed a man repeatedly in the back.

By my standards, these acts didn't make me better. Far from it. It made me feel somehow dirty, undeserving.

And how could I be a healer if I was sometimes overcome with blinding rage, a rage so strong that it would make me kill people?

Too caught in my thoughts, I didn't see Danà come behind me and gently tap my shoulder. I jumped away from her and immediately clenched my fist in the fabric of my tunic, over my rapidly beating heart.

"Hey there." Danà simply said with a soft smile. "It's been a while."

I took a few seconds to calm my heartbeat and I finally answered Danà's smile.

"Hey. I'm sorry I didn't come and see you sooner." I was being honest. I had missed her a lot.

"T'is fine. I heard you had quite a lot on your mind."

With someone else, mostly with any of my acquaintances in my previous world, I would have tried to interpret these words. But with Danà there was no other meaning, no hidden message. I was so glad to see her again. Belatedly I closed the gap between us and embraced her. She gently patted my back and smiled kindly at me when I took a step back.

"So, what are you doing here? I thought you were training with my husband this afternoon."

"If these dwarves expect me to show again in the training ground this afternoon, then they're in for a long wait." I answered evenly.

Meanwhile Danà had pushed the door to the healing wards open and had stridden in. I followed suit, not bothered by my previous thoughts anymore. I was a bit surprised to see that both Dís and Oin were there. Generally Dís wasn't working in the wards unless something specific required her attention.

"Danà, have you found the herbs I needed?" Oin said by way of greeting.

"Aye. You were lucky a merchant caravan managed to come to town a few days ago." Danà answered as I realized only then that she was holding a large basket.

Dís was sitting in a chair not too far from where Oin was working on ointments, from what I could tell, but not close enough to hinder his moves. I stood a bit sheepishly and awkwardly in the way until Dís finally gestured for me to come closer. As I did she ordered me to grab two more chairs and prepare some infusion. I obeyed without blinking, not even thinking about it. It felt natural to obey the princess, though it was maybe slightly odd I didn't perceive it as such.

After maybe ten or fifteen minutes I was sitting with Dís and Danà, drinking tea, while Oin was working close enough to hear us if we talked a bit more loudly than normally.

"So Amelia, why aren't you going back to the training grounds?" Danà asked me while blowing on her tea to cool it down a bit.

"Well, let's just say that this morning's session didn't go quite as well as planned." I answered with a disappointed shrug.

I looked up when I heard Oin put the pestle he was using back on the wooden table. He then turned to face me and put on a severe frown.

"Amelia, if you do not want to resume your apprenticeship in healing for a short while, I can understand. I don't approve, but I understand and sympathise. But you should take your training seriously, especially if you wish to go out of the Halls." He chastised me as I looked at him with wide eyes.

I was flabbergasted to hear Oin giving me such a speech. I really hadn't expected him to completely agree with my thoughts. I didn't have the time to explain what had happened. I would like to train but the male dwarves of my acquaintance were bloody idiots when it came to this particular issue. Dís spoke instead and my eyes could only widen some more in shock.

"Amelia, a healer in this world is not only that. If you go out with, for example, a merchants' caravan you might end up in the middle of a battle. It is not uncommon for the caravans to be raided, by orcs, goblins or even men. A healer has to be trained, not to fight but to survive and stay unharmed. If the healer is hurt or killed, who will help him? Who will heal him?" Dís said sternly.

I was more than surprised to hear those words being uttered by Dís. I hadn't thought she would have been supportive of my choice about training. Clearly I had been mistaken. I opened my mouth to try and explain that I agreed and understood, but Oin spoke before me and I was left listening to him with my mouth half open.

"It is important that you learn enough about fighting so that you can dodge or avoid attacks and defend yourself. You don't need to learn how to attack, just how to defend yourself first. Your health in battle is as important, if not more, than that of a soldier or warrior. As Dís put it, if the healer is killed, then the casualties might end up more important than they could have been had the healer survived."

I didn't wait when he paused, and, before Dís could say anything, I finally spoke my mind.

"Dís, Oin, I know all that. I agree with you all and I've been trying to ask to be taught such things."

"Then why aren't you training right now?" Danà asked, genuinely surprised, before sipping her tea peacefully.

"Because this morning's session was a mess. Gloin first took a swing at me with a wooden sword, which resulted in Dori yelling at him and Nori glaring at him. Then he had barely started to attack me in a hand to hand spar that Dori was shouting once more. At some point I thought the two of them would fight." I replied exasperated, though my friends understood I was annoyed with the men, not them.

There was a short moment during which none of us spoke. I distinctly saw Danà blink several times while Dís sighed and shook her head and Oin grumpily mumbled. Then Danà was the first one to speak again.

"Well, I guess it explains why Gloin was so grumpy when he came back."

"What are they thinking?" Dís groaned. "Don't they realize how important it is that you are trained? They should have started months ago too."

"To be fair, Dori and Nori are just concerned I'll be hurt." I tried to defend the brothers as I did feel rather protective of them.

"Bah." Oin exclaimed. "Dori was exactly like this when it came to train his youngest brother. Poor lad had a tough time attempting to learn anything about fighting."

"I remember an occasion when Ori came to find me. Dori and Gloin were arguing and he wanted me to stop them." Danà shared with us, smiling softly.

It did make me smile even if it was short lived.

"They might think they're protecting you, but they're actually doing the contrary. If anything they should be the ones pushing for you to learn such things." Dís interrupted Danà's recollection of old memories.

"Aye." Oin agreed before looking at me. "What kind of weapon they thought you should use?"

"Hem, we didn't talk about that…Nori did tell me I should try and improve my speed and learn how to dodge and other stuff like this." I answered a bit nervously.

"They should teach you how to use daggers. Dual ones." Dís said before sipping at her tea. "That's what I use. Well, I have short swords, but I think you're not strong enough to use those. Daggers will allow you to use your smaller frame to your advantage."

I half listened, half ignored their banter. Honestly it did interest me in so far that it concerned me. But I knew that it was likely that those talks here wouldn't have any clear effect. Instead of actively participating, I stood up as I had realized we had all finished with our cups of tea and asked them whether they wanted some more. I put some water to heat on the small stove we used here and went back to the small room where plants were stored. I took my time looking through the storage area and finally deciding to add mint with the tea leaves. Meanwhile I still listened to the discussion that took place in the main ward.

"Nah. Daggers will force her to fight in close range. She'll be at more risk." Oin shook his head in disagreement and adjusted his ear trumpet. "She should learn how to use a staff. That'll allow her to use speed, agility and will keep the enemies at a respectable distance."

Dís was about to retort when the door to the healing wards burst opened. I saw it all happen from the shadows of the storage room and was at first too surprised to react.

I saw Ori coming in with intense worry painted on his face and he went straight to Dís, Danà and Oin who immediately tensed after seeing the young dwarf's face.

"What is going on Ori?" Danà just had the time to ask before Ori spoke quickly.

"Amelia disappeared. She was really quiet at lunch and I think she was upset that her training session this morning didn't quite go as she expected. And now, no one knows where she is, no one has seen her. Fili and Kili went back to the unused corridors in case she walked there and got lost again which doesn't make sense because she has a map now."

"Ori…" Dís tried to intervene but the youngest brother kept on talking, eyes wide with worry.

"And then Dori, Nori and Gloin went down to the men's town, but when I asked the merchants near the entrance they said they didn't see her, but she could have still passed. And Gimli went to tell Bofur and Bombur about it all but none of them have seen her …" He was speaking at such a pace that I had trouble to understand everything.

"Ori…" Dís tried again while Danà imitated her and Oin just shook his head and put his ear trumpet away.

"Now Bofur and Bifur are probably looking for her too, I think they went to the mines and they even told Thàlir too who went down to the forges …"

I wanted to step forward, I really did, but a loud bang coming from the entrance door startled me, and the others too, and I temporarily forgot everything. The King strode in, his frown deeper than usual, and groaned.

"Sister! What is it that I heard? Amelia disappeared again? What is wrong with this girl?"

He seemed really angry and I instinctively took a step back.

"For Mahal's sake brother!" Dís snapped loudly. "Nothing's wrong with her!"

"I have an incredible amount of dwarves running around madly trying to find her! I thought she had a map of the Halls now, how can she get lost?!" The King snarled and I saw Oin roll his eyes as Dís put her fist to her hips as she obviously prepared to yell at her brother.

"Hem…excuse me? I'm…not lost." I squeaked shyly from the door leading to the storage room.

All eyes immediately were on me and I gulped.

Now that was going to be a funny discussion…

* * *

><p><strong>AN: Hello everyone! You are all amazing :) All those reviews made me so happy you can't imagine! Thanks a lot for the comments and support! Thanks to every reader too as well as the people who added me to their favourites and the new followers :) **

**So yes, it obviously was Nori. But that much wasn't too complicated, right? **

**I know I made the dwarves overreact a bit in this chapter, but somehow I just couldn't picture Dori standing by as Amelia was getting hit repeatedly. As for the Khuzdul, I found those sentences on a website (the link is on my profile) so if there's a mistake...sorry I guess.**

**As for their reaction to Amelia's disappearance, well, for their defense she is often in trouble, right? **

**Anyway I hope you liked it...oh, and please don't kill me for the kiss between Nori and Amelia :) There was just no way I would let those two get together so easily ^^**

**The next update would probably be Tuesday at the earliest. Wednesday latest. :)**

**Happy Easter to all of you who care about that holiday :) Here we're going to eat lots of chocolate brought by...bells (we actually eat rabbits :P)**


	28. Promises and Unexpected Help

**Nothing belongs to me, it's all JRR Tolkien property, except for my OC and the plot.**

* * *

><p>It probably would have made me laugh had I not been in the middle of the whole mess. The dwarves were funny people to live with, when they weren't annoying and noisy. Currently though, the dwarves around were silent for a whole minute before Ori yelped and ran in my direction. He gathered me in his arms and brought me roughly to his chest. I was left with my arms hanging awkwardly at my side for a minute as Ori hugged me rather tightly. His action actually made me realize that despite his smaller and apparently weaker frame, Ori was really quite strong.<p>

He was babbling while hugging me fiercely, telling me how worried he had been and how frantically they had all been looking around.

During his whole speech I kept on blinking and looking at the other dwarves with surprise. The King groaned and brought one of his hands to his face before he passed it angrily through his long dark hair. He looked really annoyed right now. I couldn't help but picture him pulling at his hair in anger but managed to stop a smirk from appearing on my lips. Now wasn't really the time to daydream and portray the others in imaginary situations, especially funny ones involving the King.

I finally broke out of my daze and patted Ori's shoulder reassuringly.

"I'm fine Ori. I'm fine. Honestly I don't understand why you were so worried." I said softly.

I saw Danà, Oin and Dís nod. Obviously the three of them didn't understand this weird reaction either. Danà was clearly entertained by all the events. She was looking from the King to Ori and me with a small, twitching smirk at her lips. Dís seemed to ignore us and observed her brother's reactions while Oin was uncaring of it all.

Ori's shaky voice forced me to focus once more.

"Well, you were clearly upset and then you left and none of us knew where you went…"

"But…erm…"

I had no idea what to say. Still, they thought I tended to overreact? Well at least I knew who had rubbed off on me now. These dwarves seemed to be constantly worried about me and I didn't quite know how to react to that.

In a way I couldn't help but be annoyed that they wouldn't train me properly. It seemed logical to think that if they did train me, then they wouldn't have to worry so much, or at least they should then be able to trust me a bit more to stay safe until someone arrived. But instead of helping me in that way, I had the feeling they would rather put me in a warm and comfy cocoon and then would keep me locked forever inside a fortress. I truly didn't like this thought. It felt as if their good-hearted concern was actually belittling me and my capacities. Did they think me incapable of taking care of myself? Did they believe I couldn't learn anything useful? That was offending in a way.

On the other hand I had to admit it felt oddly good to be always protected, pampered almost, by all these grown men. I didn't mind their care, I actually enjoyed it. I liked how Dori would kindly prepare me chamomile without even asking. I found Ori cute every time he would smother me with endless questions about my well being. I even found Nori's weird over protectiveness rather endearing...sometimes. Knowing that someone would be there for me, would worry for me, would care about what might happen to me, it almost made my head spin.

Though I wasn't being entirely fair; once my uncle and aunt had been there for me in a similar way, but the dwarves just seemed to be … more.

More easily worried, more careful, more understanding…

I felt a pang of sadness in my heart when I actually realized that even though I had loved my blood family as they had loved me, my aunt and uncle just somehow paled in comparison to the dwarves.

It hurt to think that.

I felt I was betraying them.

It wasn't that they hadn't been enough; they had always done everything they could for me. I still loved them and my memories of them fiercely. I still missed them and the quiet happiness we had shared. But it seemed that I was oddly more fitted for a life around here. I felt scared, unsure of myself, often puzzled too, there was no use in denying that in the end this wasn't my world. Sometimes I barely understood what was going on around me. But at the end of the day, even though I went through quite a lot of hardship here too, I was feeling better than I ever had. I felt as if I somehow belonged here. Being here was just right. Being with the dwarves was right.

I was forced to let those thoughts aside when the King groaned once more and Ori stepped away from our embrace. The young dwarf looked a bit embarrassed right then, but the King's voice diverted all attention to him.

"I can't believe I have I don't know how many dwarves running around to find a girl and none of them thought to look for her here."

I had to bit the inside of my cheek not to laugh. The King looked really disappointed and annoyed. I could so easily picture him, banging his head on any hard surface right now. I felt a laugh threatening to come out loudly. If I let myself do that, the King would surely kill me. I managed to clear my throat and forced myself to talk normally.

"What should we do then?"

"Do? There's nothing for you to do my dear." Dís said with a shrug.

"Of course we have to do something." Her brother snapped. "I don't want to end up with a war against the men because those idiots provoked them over something that didn't even happen."

"What have the men to do with this?" I frowned.

Meanwhile Danà slowly brought one hand to her mouth and pressed her fingers tightly against her lips. At this instant I had the undeniable certainty that my dear friend was struggling not to laugh too.

"Absolutely nothing..." The King spoke in an overly sweet voice before finding his natural snappish tone once more. "Except your guardians are under the impression you're always having problems with them. Right now they're probably looking under every rock in the men's town."

"Oh…" That was the only thing I found myself able to pronounce.

What was there to say? Well, I for sure didn't know. My eyes fell on Danà. I shouldn't have glanced at her. Her shoulders were trembling and I could see it was getting hard for her not to laugh heartily. Even Dís seemed amused by it all, despite her brother obvious annoyance of it all or maybe because of it.

It was all rather funny, though the poor King clearly disagreed.

"Ori, go tell the guards at the entrance that she's been found and then go find back your brothers and the others in town. Make sure no one left further and that every one looking for her knows she's safe." The gruff command was clear.

Ori seemed reluctant to leave at first but the King's glare and my reassuring smile did wonders and he quickly left us. Once the door was closed behind him the King sighed and let himself fall on the chair I had previously occupied. He suddenly looked rather tired, which was an interesting if not positive change from his ever annoyed frown.

"Amelia, dear, do you think you could prepare us this tea now? I think my brother needs it." Dís asked me with a kind smile.

When they were next to each other, it was easy to see they were siblings. They had the same long black hair, though Dís' were wavier and had less grey strands than her brother. Another major difference was that Dís' beard was not only thinner and probably softer, but it was longer too, separated in three braids. One larger braid ended with what I guessed to be a silver bead, though it was somehow shiner, and two thin ones curled up and ended with shiny deep red stones. The King had actually a pretty normal beard. Now that I thought about it, it was rather strange to see him with such a short one, especially now that I knew how much they meant for the dwarves. Instead of commenting on this though, I chose to simply nod to Dís and started preparing tea for all of us.

Oin took his ear trumpet back and motioned for me to bring two more chairs, which I did, and once the tea was prepared, I sat with the dwarves. Danà was still smiling happily and it was easy to see in her eyes how amused she was by this mess.

At first we simply drank in silence, until the King looked at me with his piercing blue eyes and gruffly asked me.

"What are you doing here anyway? I thought you didn't want to be a healer anymore."

I sighed a bit and thought about my words before answering.

"It's not that I don't want to be a healer. It's just that for me, killing a man after having poisoned people isn't really…" I frowned. I didn't really know how to put it. "I feel like I don't have the right to call myself a healer after that."

There was a short silence and I saw the King nod thoughtfully before his sister talked.

"We already told you that we don't agree. But we do understand. Take your time to deal with it and meanwhile concentrate on that training of yours." She had motioned towards Oin and the dwarf simply nodded, Danà for her part didn't add anything.

"Training?" The King asked.

"Amelia should know how to defend herself." Oin grumpily answered before more or less repeating the conversation we had earlier to the King.

While he talked I tried to picture myself with a weapon in my hands. I was fairly certain I would not be able to even lift one of the dwarves' massive war axes and I had a terrible aim so even the smaller throwing axes were out of the question. Once when I tried to play darts I actually managed to stick one of the small projectiles in the ceiling…I still didn't understand how I did that. I had been seriously aiming at the target too. My mind went back to the original topic. I didn't know much about medieval weapons. Except for axes, bows and swords, I had no idea what could be used or even useful. I didn't think that a sword would be a good idea for me either. I wasn't really strong and I was short, wouldn't that be at my disadvantage?

But then it would be the same problem with every weapon.

I shook my head. It was pointless for me to think about all this. The dwarves were the warriors, they would know better than me what I should learn or use. I paid attention once more to the others' conversation.

"Well, I'll talk to Gloin but he isn't really the most proficient with staffs and daggers. Oin, could you spare some time to train her?" The King said before eyeing his tea with a frown.

"I can't leave the wards Thorin." The healer replied immediately.

"Bifur could maybe help with the training. He does use his spear masterfully." Danà commented.

"And how will he talk to her?" Dís countered. "I could take care of the wards in the mornings; it will give you some time." She added turning to Oin.

I listened to them. Honestly I had no idea what I could say. I wanted to train and learn how to defend myself at the very least, I didn't really mind if I had to train with one dwarf or another. Still I shifted awkwardly on my seat when Dís spoke. Kili had asked me not to reveal that I knew some words in Iglishmêk because I wasn't supposed to learn it. We had both lied after coming back from Gorm the second time, conveniently forgetting to tell anyone I knew a few words of that secret sign language. I had thought it stupid, but I understood why Kili didn't particularly feel like being yelled at by his uncle. Dwarves were supremely defensive of their secrets and treasures. Apparently that included their languages and, from what I could tell, their women too.

"Fili could help her with twin daggers." Dís then said.

"Fili is used to dual swords, though he's strong with daggers, it isn't his weapon of choice. I was thinking Nori could train her." The King commented, rubbing his chin pensively.

"Nori?" I peeked up at hearing that.

"It's true that Nori is among the bests when it comes to the use of twin daggers." Danà added with a nod.

"More importantly, it'll keep him away of his other…occupation." The King replied.

I suddenly felt indignant after hearing his words. He wanted to use me in order to force Nori to stay within the halls, conveniently obliging him to give up his activities for a while. Had it been any other people involved I might have thought the plan to be rather logical and efficient. But it was Nori and me. And because of that I couldn't help but feel slightly angry at the thought the King wanted to use me against him. Besides I knew that Nori was looking for something important to him, had been looking for it for decades actually, and I couldn't let the King hinder Nori's search.

I quickly tried to find an idea that would both show the King I agreed with him while actually allowing Nori to leave the Halls. I needed to be precise and discreet. It shouldn't be obvious that I was actually taking Nori's side against our King.

"Excuse me but…" I said hesitantly as my brain was still looking for an appropriate plan.

All eyes were suddenly on me. I inhale slowly as an idea started to form in the back of my mind.

"You don't want Nori to help you?" Dís asked sensing I was about to disagree with them.

"It's not that." I replied before licking my lower lip nervously. "It's just that I don't think it would be such a good idea for me to learn so many things at once."

"Nonsense." The King said dismissingly.

"I just mean to say that I'm obviously not used to physical activities." I insisted. "Physiologically it wouldn't be efficient for me to immediately start with a complete schedule." I knew there was no way they would understand the term physiological, but I wanted them to concentrate on my words, not Nori.

"What do you mean?" Dís asked with a deep frown that was mirrored on her brother's face.

"I'm just saying that it would be better for me to first start slowly and gradually intensify my training. From a medical point of view, it would be more logical to work like this. As for the training, I'm sure you don't train your children as if they were seasoned warriors. My abilities are closer to that of a child right now." It was all very logical.

Dís and Oin shared a glance before nodding, the both of them were still frowning slightly though and I couldn't help but wonder what they were actually thinking at the moment. Danà was observing me intently and it unnerved me slightly. Still she remained silent as a soft smile graced her features.

"So how would you train then?"

I glanced at the King. This was a stupid question. He should know what I had meant to say. The odd part was that the King was anything but stupid. It then dawned on me he was probably testing my logic. I didn't ponder on that and chose to answer quickly instead. All this attention was beginning to unsettle me greatly.

"Well, I think I should probably continue first to build up my endurance and strength and probably then start with whatever weapon you think I should know how to use first. As for the actual training, you all know what I should do better than me." I shrugged.

The King stared at me, appraising me, but I knew I was right. Everything I had said was logical. It shouldn't even have surprised them. Actually they should have thought about it themselves. I was a beginner. There was no way I could learn to use weapons and train and basically do everything at the same time. But maybe they didn't truly realize I was truly weak compared to their standards. After all, I had never really talked about my world to the King. I had never really talked to him at all. With Dís and Oin I mostly discussed medicine related topics and with Danà cultural ones. They couldn't know I was such a beginner.

But what mattered most for me right then, was that with this simple logic, I could help Nori.

The King wanted to force him to stay in the Halls. I wouldn't let him do that and once more, simple logic was really helpful.

For the first part I didn't need Nori, so they couldn't force him to stay in the Halls, and then if I insisted to learn one weapon at a time, he would be free to leave once more at some point. I was rather happy with such an arrangement but I could tell from the King's slight frown that it wasn't the case for everyone. I didn't care at the moment though, I wouldn't let them use me to chain Nori to the halls.

"It does make sense." Oin finally agreed.

He didn't comment further and I held my breath. Clearly we were all waiting for the King's decision. Even though I found him incomprehensible at times, I was certain he was following some sort of logic. My little speech should be enough to convince him, even though he clearly had started to plan for Nori to be stuck in the Halls.

"Well then…you'll start tomorrow with Dwalin and Gloin." The King relented rather unhappily.

I let a small sigh of relief escape my lips, but no one paid attention to it as Danà spoke immediately after the dwarf.

"It might be a good idea to forbid the training ground to Dori and Nori while she's trained by Dwalin and Gloin." Danà added before sipping her tea calmly.

"Why?" The King frowned once more.

Seriously sometimes I wondered whether he knew how to smile, then I remembered his life story and conceded that he might have the right to be grumpy.

Danà didn't answer and simply arched one eyebrow, looking pointedly at the King before glancing towards me. His icy blue eyes looked at me questioningly. I shrugged, there wasn't much to say about that but I couldn't help but think that Danà's idea wasn't that bad. The dwarf sighed. He didn't need an explanation after all, not after the whole debacle that involved me and the dwarves that very afternoon.

"Right." The King said. "Then tomorrow you start your training and when Dwalin and Gloin agree and think you can move on, we'll see if Bifur and Oin can both help you train with a staff."

After those words the King swiftly stood, placed his small tea cup on the table and nodded at us before striding out of the wards.

The four of us remained silent for awhile. Dís observed me carefully. Then Danà said with a sly smirk.

"Nori will be happy to learn that he can still go out of the halls."

"These brothers are definitely lucky to have you on their side…" Dís agreed with a smirk of her own.

Oin huffed and went back to his ointment while I blushed a bit as the two women kept on observing me.

I clearly wasn't as discreet as I thought.

* * *

><p>Later that afternoon, I was scribbling in my notebook, sitting by the fire in the living room, when the door finally opened to let the three brothers enter, closely followed by Bofur, Bifur and Bombur.<p>

I glanced at them and couldn't help but smile slightly. From what I had understood they had spent quite a while running around, looking for me when I was simply having tea in the healing wards. All their gazes immediately riveted on me and I could see some tension visibly leave their shoulders. These dwarves were really worrying too much.

"Hey." I said simply.

"Amelia, are you alright?" Dori immediately asked, coming next to me as if to check I wasn't hurt.

"Of course." I scoffed. "I was in the healing wards as I'm sure Ori told you."

"Are you back to being a healer then lass?" Bofur asked while taking a seat.

The others imitated him and soon we were all comfortably sitting, though Ori and Nori were on simple wooden chairs not armchairs like the others.

"I'm not. I just walked there and met with Dís, Danà and Oin." I answered simply.

"Why didn't you tell us?" Ori's voice was as soft as ever and he looked at me with big surprised eyes.

"Because I was still annoyed with you when I left…" My tone was perfectly calm, as I wrote the end of my sentence quickly, not looking at either of them.

"Why?"

That word made me look up. I hadn't paid attention to who had spoken this word, but the question was reflected in all their gazes.

"Don't you realize that the both of you just spoiled completely my training this morning?" I pointed at Nori and Dori who looked slightly sheepish. "The King said that for my next training sessions you won't be allowed on the grounds at all."

"What?! That's preposterous! I will not let you be injured by this…"

"Dori!" I cut in. "I'm going to train with Gloin and Dwalin. I'm probably going to be hurt and I don't want to hear that you went to yell at them about it. I've had enough of stupid arguments this morning. Do you want me to actually be killed next time I leave the Halls? Because I will leave the Halls again and without being trained I will remain weak. And I might not be lucky the next time. So it's your choice, either you let me train properly or you'll cry over my body once I'm dead."

The words were harsh, the tone slightly snappish though I remained calm, but the words were true and honest. I wasn't stupid. I knew I had been extremely lucky both times I went to Gorm and I had been lucky during my first weeks here when the dwarves had managed to save me from the men who took me. I knew I was weak, I knew I was desperately and pathetically unprepared to life here. If I wanted to be able to survive in this world and more importantly live, I would have no other choice but to strengthen up. I knew I had grown a bit mentally but that was far from enough.

Now I needed to strengthen my body and that meant training. That meant knowing how to fight or at least to defend myself. Otherwise I wouldn't possibly be able to survive long. Even with the dwarves to protect me, even with what little wit and luck I had, I wouldn't survive in this violent and harsh world.

Dori and Nori would just have to accept it.

They couldn't always be there to help me, to protect me.

My wit will not protect me from a blade or an arrow.

My luck was as strong as my unnatural ability to get into trouble.

They had to understand that.

The dwarves avoided my gaze and exchanged glances. Most of them looked sheepish, even Bofur though Bombur and Bifur nodded at my words, apparently agreeing with me.

"We're just worried." Dori sighed looking rather put out by my little outburst.

"I know Dori. And honestly I'm glad to know you care that much for me. Really. But it's not helping me in this instance. I'd rather be hurt by Dwalin and Gloin during training than by men outside." I replied softly.

I saw them nod at my words, even though Nori was frowning and clearly unhappy. But at least he understood and accepted my point of view.

Little by little we eased in less controversial conversations and soon Bombur, Dori and I ended up in the kitchen, preparing dinner. The others were already smoking happily. It was odd that their habit didn't disturb me. I had fervently been against cigarettes before. But what they smoked wasn't tampered with addictive products. It was just plants and the smell of the smoke wasn't nearly as bad as that of cigarettes. Actually it even smelt rather nice.

"Should we try another one of your recipe Amelia?" Bombur asked with a soft smile, forcing me to focus on the present time.

I chuckled a bit and Dori smiled too before I answered.

"I'm not sure Bombur. They spent quite some time running around to find me. I think these dwarves deserve a nice dinner."

"Aye, we did run quite a bit." Dori agreed.

I smiled at him while he brought a huge round cheese and let it loudly fall on the table.

"You know." I said. "There's actually a recipe we could try and I swear it doesn't include fruits and vegetables."

At that the two dwarves looked at me as I quickly explained what ingredients were needed and to my surprise Dori was as intrigued as Bombur.

"It does sound like an interesting idea." Bombur nodded with his usual little smile.

"Well, it doesn't require much work either, but I don't recommend you try and prepare it for the main dining hall. I really don't think it'd be such a good idea. Besides, I think the King wouldn't be pleased if I were to cause trouble again."

Bombur grinned as he started to prepare the food for our dinner, firstly putting some meat in the oven and then starting to prepare my recipe.

"Don't worry about Thorin." Dori said while cutting the cheese in pieces. "He's a good and fair leader. He knows you're not trying to cause trouble, I think he's actually starting to respect you."

"Does he?" I asked though to be honest I wasn't sure what to make of the answer either way. "I mean, he doesn't really show any…appreciation. Actually I can't read him at all, he's always acting weird for me."

Bombur smiled at that and Dori even snorted. His amusement didn't last long though and he quickly became serious again.

"Thorin is...well he's been starting to think about a lot of things recently." Dori replied frowning slightly.

"You mean with the message he received?" Bombur asked.

"Aye. I'm not sure who send it but since he received that message he's been rather…restless. Or at least grumpier than usual, he's actually been thinking about leaving the Halls alone to go meet the one who sent it, or so Balin told me."

"That probably didn't please Balin." Bombur commented as he was checking over the meat and then went back to the cauldron we used for preparing my recipe.

"Not pleasing Balin?" Dori snorted. "He's been trying to convince Thorin to at least bring Dwalin with him, but he's more stubborn than a dozen dwarves together."

I was listening intently to this conversation even though I could only understand it a bit. It felt strangely peaceful to be there, cutting pieces of bread while listening to Dori and Bombur talk. And I couldn't help but be somehow happy that they would talk about what seemed like important things in front of me. I felt as if they were considering it normal for me to be there while they discussed details of Thorin's Halls politics. I couldn't lie to myself; I was pleased because I took it for a sign of trust. It wasn't as if they had forgotten I was sitting with them, they just trusted me enough.

"How far away is the meeting point?" I asked then.

"I'm not too sure, but I can't believe Thorin would agree to go too far of the Halls." Dori shrugged.

"I wouldn't be so sure." Bombur softly disagreed.

I could easily see that they were both worried for their leader and I couldn't help but be impressed by their loyalty towards him. It was strangely clear in my mind then that these dwarves would probably follow the King anywhere if he asked them. But apparently the King wasn't one to ask for help and preferred to do things by himself. I realized with surprise that it would sadden me if something were to happen to him. Well not really sadden, I couldn't put a name to it, but something told me it wouldn't be a happy feeling.

"And when would our leader supposedly leave for this meeting?" I asked once I had finished my task with the bread.

"In a few months I think but I'm truly not sure, could as well be next year for all I know. If anyone knows it'd be Balin, but even him didn't appear certain of anything." Dori answered while putting the large cauldron over the stove as Bombur took a long wooden spoon.

Dori then came to seat beside me on the bench and I could feel he wanted to say something but felt reluctant to do so. I lightly bumped his shoulder with mine and smiled softly when he glanced towards me. His smile was a bit unsure but I waited patiently for him to talk. When he finally did, his voice was low and I immediately understood that, even though Bombur would hear, he didn't really want to express these thoughts to everyone.

"Amelia, I'm sorry about earlier." He said, shocking me at the same time. "It is not that I don't believe you capable of learning. Actually it is quite the contrary. But you have to understand, our world…there's no amount of training that could really protect you. I lost my father when he was outside our halls. He was a skilled warrior, he trained a lot. He was strong but that didn't protect him in the end."

I held my breath as I listened to him. Now I understood perfectly why he didn't want to talk too loudly, Dori was probably trying to protect his brothers; the topic was painful for the three of them obviously and he didn't want to remind the two younger dwarves of their father's death.

"After his death our mother..." He paused, visibly looking for his words. "Ori was eleven at the time. Our Ma she…she changed after our Da's death. She didn't smile anymore, only managed to do so with Ori punctually. She spent several years as a recluse until one day, after Ori's twentieth birthday, she started to go out with the caravans too. She left just like that, leaving Ori to me and Nori."

I glanced at Bombur but the dwarf remained silent. Any trace of a smile had disappeared from his features though. I tried to imagine what it must have been like, to see your mother go away while having to take care of your younger brother. Dori was still speaking though and I quickly turned my attention back to him.

"She knew how to fight. She had lived in Erebor and had survived the years of exile after all. She was strong too."

I was completely silent as Dori spoke in a forlorn voice, his face expressed how hurt he still was, how painful it was for him to speak about this. He closed his eyes and my heart clenched. Silence was oddly suffocating for a minute until Dori managed to start once more.

"She was strong. You should have seen her…she was just like Dís, stubborn and confident."

Dori's voice faltered again as he stared at the wall in front of him. He had this particular look on his face that made me realize that he was probably lost in his memories, seeing his mother again in front of his eyes. My heart clenched painfully. I knew how it felt to lose someone. I knew it. I could feel his pain and understood it all too well.

"Even though she was strong, even though she was travelling with others, she came back hurt. Her injury wasn't too bad in itself, just a deep gash on her forearm's length." He gestured to his arm to illustrate his words. "But it got infected."

I couldn't help but close my eyes, trying to swallow back the lump in my throat. I wasn't sure I wanted to hear the rest of the story but on the other hand I didn't want to stop Dori. There was a point in him telling me this and I was starting to guess what it was. I listened to him, my heart breaking at his words and as I heard the pain so clear in his voice. I knew already what he was going to say but it didn't help at all.

"Oin and Dís… they tried their best. They really did. But even though they somehow managed to heal that first infection, it left our Ma incredibly weak. She couldn't even leave her bed anymore after that and seemed always sick. It was terrible to witness her slowly decline to the point when we had to feed her because she couldn't eat by herself anymore."

Dori took a deep, shaky breath and rubbed his forehead tiredly. He didn't try to hide the guilt that he apparently felt.

"I wasn't there much back then. I had to go with the caravans much more often."

He looked at his hands that were now resting on the table. A deep frown marred his face and I couldn't tear my eyes away.

"Ori was here all the time. He took care of her. He saw her waste away. He witnessed it all."

I bit my lip strongly. Even I couldn't even start to fathom how the poor dwarf must have felt. Ignoring everything else, Dori kept talking.

"It was around then that Nori started to leave the halls, though I learned about his activities much later. Ori was only thirty four when she died. It is young for a dwarf…"

I couldn't resist anymore. Tears in my eyes I grabbed Dori's hand and squeezed it. I think I understood his point but I managed to swallow my tears and waited for him to finish.

"This is partly why I'm not fine with you going out of the Halls. I can't help but think about what could happen. If you were to disappear like our Da did, Amelia I think that I would roam Middle Earth until I find your body or died myself. I know I wouldn't be alone in this quest." His voice was strong as he spoke those words.

I could feel his utter certainty as he pronounced them. It almost sounded like a vow and it scared me slightly. I knew I was important to them. It was easy to see. But this was different. It made me feel responsible somehow. I felt like I owed them to be safe.

Dori's voice was strangled when he spoke next.

"And if you were to end up like our Ma…Amelia I know Ori would be devastated to see you like that. And I… I couldn't forgive myself if such a thing happened to you. You're not only a ward anymore. You're part of our family. I think of you as my baby sister now."

I couldn't stop the tears anymore. Slowly I lifted Dori's arm and slid closer to him before letting his arm fall around my shoulders. I then hugged him fiercely.

"I understand Dori. I feel like that too." I said with a strangled voice. "I do. But…"

I stopped. How could I tell him just after he opened like this to me that, whatever his words, I would still attempt to train and I still planned to go out? How could I be so cruel? Could I spend a life behind the protection of the mountain walls? Could I do it and not resent them later on? Sadly I knew I couldn't. I would end up hurting them either way.

"I know Amelia." Dori softly replied. "I know and I understand too. I just wanted to let you know why we reacted like this."

I nodded and I felt him hug me back. I was so moved both by his speech and the fact that he had called me his baby sister. It was such a strange mixture of feeling.

Dori cleared his throat a bit before patting my back and speaking.

"Tomorrow, I'll accompany you to the training grounds, and then I'll leave immediately. You better give it your all because I'm not going to let you follow me if you're not able to at least run away of a fight."

I let the tears fall freely on my cheeks as I embraced Dori. He was always worrying about me and would probably always be; if his behaviour towards Ori was anything to go by. But in the end I wouldn't change him because, even though he couldn't help but worry, he still fought his own instincts. And I knew he was only doing it for my sake only.

"Thanks." I managed to utter.

Bombur had been silent during the whole time, staying next to the cauldron and seemingly concentrating on the mixture that was starting to bubble in it. I was starting to know him better now. The ginger chef was a calm character but really thoughtful and kind. I could have bet that he knew what Dori was probably going to say. The fact that Dori managed to speak in front of Bombur just showed how much he trusted him. Bombur was a true caring friend in his own, silent and discreet way. He had provided us with his peaceful but silent presence and I was glad he was there.

He only turned to face us once I stopped sniffling. Dori had kept an arm around my shoulder and I didn't hesitate to lean against him. Bombur smiled at the both of us and then happily said dinner was ready. Quickly Dori and I helped put everything missing on the table and around fifteen minutes later we called for the other to join us.

Once everyone was sitting around the table, they all eyed the cauldron with caution.

"What's in that?" Bofur asked.

"Is it one of Amelia's recipes?" Ori added and I saw all those who hadn't help in the kitchen stiffen on their seats.

Well of them except for Bifur who just seemed to take a deep breath before addressing me an approving grunt and nod. Nori was looking at me suspiciously yet he schooled his features. Bofur and Ori though didn't even try to hide their fears. I sighed exasperatedly.

"Yes, it's one of my recipes. It's called 'fondue' and it's basically melted cheese and alcohol. Though this is not the right cheese and you usually use white wine and not…whatever it was that Bombur put in it."

The tension seemed to leave them a bit and I resisted the urge to roll my eyes, were my other recipes so terrible that they were scared of them now?

Still they all looked curiously at the cauldron now. Ori even was brave enough to take his fork and poked the hot mixture that was in it. I smiled at the sight.

"And how do we eat it?" Ori asked perplexed. "It's all…melted."

"It's supposed to be melted." I replied before explaining. "You take a piece of bread on your fork or knife and you dip it in the melted cheese. Then you just have to eat the bread coated with it." I showed them as I explained and, though the taste was completely different from that of my memories, it still tasted nice.

The dwarves observed me as I ate the piece of bread before they all started to imitate me. As they all plunged the bread in the cauldron I spoke once more.

"I bet one of you will lose his bread in the cauldron."

They all eyed me suspiciously and I chuckled lightly when Bofur grumpily realized he had nothing to eat.

This started a rather strange gambling game and after fifteen minutes I realized that eating fondue with dwarves probably wasn't such a good idea. Threads of cheese coated the table and when they started to throw bread at Bombur my eyes widened in horror. There was cheese everywhere. But the sight of the dwarves with their usually nicely trimmed and braided beard that now sported strings of cheese was enough to make me smile again. It was like eating with a bunch of five years old and it would be a nightmare to clean it all but well, at least we had fun.

* * *

><p>The following morning Dori woke me rather early. He had prepared a huge breakfast with assortments of meats and cheeses with fresh bread and honey and even some fruits. When I looked at him questioningly he simply smiled and told me that I needed to eat properly if I wanted to have enough energy for my first real training.<p>

Suddenly I seemed to realize that everything I had done so far was probably rather light and the training I was about to start would be much more intense. As I was about to fill my plate, Dori stopped me.

"I put all of this on the table so that you have choice. Don't eat too much."

"But I'll starve if I don't eat enough."I replied.

"The more you eat, the more chances there are that you'll be sick." Nori's voice forced me to glance behind my shoulder.

I saw he was wearing his travelling coat and it only took a glimpse at Dori's frowning face to confirm my suspicion. Nori was leaving the Halls today. He was going to look for those items he was searching. Dori glared at his brother before ignoring him completely and leaving for his room.

After a few minutes of rather awkward silence I cleared my throat.

"You're leaving today?" It seemed so pointless to ask.

"Aye."

He didn't look at me. Maybe I imagined things, but he seemed rather hesitant, his expression was guarded. I observed him for several minutes while he put a loaf of bread, some cheese and dried meat in his leather bag. I put my hand on his forearm, forcing him to halt his movements.

"Remember your promise? You'll let me check you for injuries when you come back?"

His eyes finally looked at me and I saw his hard gaze soften. A small smile pulled the corner of his lips upwards, not a smirk, a true little smile that made my heart skip a beat.

"Aye."

I nodded. There wasn't much to say truly. I couldn't, and wouldn't, stop him. He needed this and I had no right to try and force him to stay here, especially when I was complaining about them trying to force me to stay. Still, it didn't stop me from worrying even though Nori hadn't left yet. Suddenly the urge to help him in any way I could overtook me. There wasn't much I could do but I still could try.

"What plants do you have with you?" I asked him suddenly.

"What?" He turned to me with a questioning frown.

"Plants, dried ones. If you are hurt, what are you going to use?"

"Amelia, I don't plan on being…" He tried to say before I interrupted him.

"Yeah, because when you're hurt usually you planned it before?" I was clearly being sarcastic but my tone softened when I continued. "Just, give me a minute. I'll prepare a small satchel with different plants you can use."

I darted to my room, finding my abandoned bag near my trunk and rummaged through it to find my satchel. I would have to resupply it anyway but I could give Nori several pouches. I took them and strode to the kitchen where Nori was thankfully waiting for me.

"Here." I said handing him the first pouch. "This is thyme as I'm sure you know. If you're hurt, use it to clean your wound. Remember to use only boiled water."

I saw him smile once more and I swallowed thickly. At least he was being attentive to my words.

"Aye. I'll remember."

His grave voice was barely audible as he whispered his answer.

"And here you have Echinacea. Just put a spoon in a cup of boiled water, when it's cool enough drink it. It will strengthen your body against infections."

He nodded as I gave him the third and last pouch.

"And this is a preparation for an ointment. You just have to add water to make a paste. You put it on your wound after it's been cleaned. It should reduce pain and swelling, it's mostly Witch Hazel."

"Thanks Mizimul." He whispered and I saw how grateful he was in the unusual shine in his eyes.

It was at that moment only that I understood how meaningful this gesture probably was for him. Everyone was either berating him or trying to stop him, simply because he was a thief. I was fairly certain I was the first one to actively try to help him instead. I didn't like the fact that he was a thief, but I knew it was something important for him. I could relate to that. In such a case I could only try my best to support him and make sure he would come back relatively unharmed.

As he turned and put the three pouches in his bag I just observed him. In just a minute he seemed ready to leave. He remained motionless for a second, glancing at me, clearly unsure of what to do next. For the first time we faced each other awkwardly though I couldn't fathom why it would feel like that. He seemed to hesitate and probably was about to do something when I spoke, stopping whatever he was going to do.

"Just…be careful. And come back soon. Alright?" I almost whispered.

My eyes were locked to his grey ones and I was unable to look away. He stared at me for a little while, his gaze was rather intense and suddenly I couldn't stand it anymore. My eyes avoided his and I heard him clear his throat.

"I will. I promise."

I nodded, feeling already sad at his departure though he was still facing me.

"Good luck with your training." He murmured before adding. "And be careful too."

"I promise." I answered while looking at my hands.

And this time I'll really do everything in my power to keep my promise to him.

* * *

><p>I immediately felt the loss. I was counting the days since he'd left and I suddenly understood Ori's forlorn mood much more. I was actually mirroring them. Dori was for his part clearly angry, but now that I knew better what had happened to their parents, I understood his temper too.<p>

It was obvious that his anger was solely directed at Nori, and it was the fact that Nori would endanger himself seemingly carelessly that fuelled Dori's mood. Nori was not only going out, which was already dangerous, but he was a thief and even I could guess some of the problems that were related to his activities. What would happen if he were caught? From what I had understood so far, the judicial system around was almost…nonexistent.

Nori could be hanged, killed on the spot, imprisoned and what else? Even just thinking about those made my skin crawl so I didn't really need to try and find other potential punishments for thievery. What if they cut limbs like it happened in movies?

Instead of wallowing in worry I decided to truly invest everything in my training.

Nightmares plagued me and often starred Nori in various bloodied states. So I worked harder to the point I was so exhausted each evening that I barely had the energy to eat much less then to dream. I spent all my time in the training grounds, and if I wasn't seen there I would either be replenishing my stock of medicinal plants at the markets or healing wards, or I was at home cooking or sleeping.

My muscles ached, protesting against the harsh treatment they received. My lungs burnt, my legs burnt, my arms burnt, my head was light more often than I could count.

It was hard.

It was painful.

And I was still doing basic training.

At that moment only did I truly comprehend how unfit I was. But it was worth it. So I ran the laps as I was asked to, I didn't complain and ran until I would fall to the ground in exhaustion. The mornings especially were tiring. I would run for who knows how long. I had no reprieve but for a short break before I would learn how to dodge and avoid blades and blows. I was sparring with various dwarves, but it usually was Dwalin and Gloin who trained me. Sometimes I would spar with Gimli who, I discovered then, had a great sense of humour. He had the mouth of a sailor as well and clearly despised elves almost as much as orcs.

It was fun.

The sparring lessons were brutal and painful in a whole new way. Usually I would be forced to fight barehanded while a dwarf was attacking me with wooden knives or swords. From the start of the spar to the last second of it, it was jumping sideways, jumping above the blade, jumping back, crouching before bouncing back, blocking with my hands without touching the wood, paring with my forearms…

My arms and legs were black and blue and I spent much time in the healing wards just in order to resupply my rapidly disappearing stock of plants. Oin was kind enough not to comment whenever I would stumble or limp into the wards. He was getting used to seeing me rummaging through the plants and grumbling because I couldn't find any aspirin…he didn't even ask me to explain what I meant by that.

During the afternoons I wasn't sparing much though, because the grounds were used by skilful warriors, and I would simply observe them as they trained. Meanwhile Dwalin or Gloin would explain me why some movements were better than others. It was both interesting and frightening. Frightening because I couldn't fathom how someone would be able to think about all of that while fighting for real. When I voiced my fears Dwalin grunted and crossed his arms.

"That's why we train so much, lass. The more we train and repeat the right moves, the more they become instinctual."

I nodded pensively, it made sense actually.

There hadn't been any discussion yet as to when I would be given a weapon. Dwalin and Gloin agreed that I wouldn't learn how to defend myself with one until I was able to survive a barehanded spar. At the moment each spar ended with me either lethally wounded or simply dead. It was rather disheartening.

Thankfully Ori, Fili, Kili and soon Gimli too were highly supportive. They would offer me advises and would encourage me loudly. Not once did they laugh at me when I fell. Not once did they jump to stop the spar when I was being hurt.

It spoke volumes to me.

They understood and agreed with my will to learn.

* * *

><p>A month and a half after Nori's departure I was not worried anymore. I was terrified. Listening to the warriors relating their encounters with orcs and goblins finally made me understand that those nightmarish creatures were real and incredibly dangerous.<p>

Those discussions awoke me to the dangers one could encounter outside. Then there were the usual issues of leaving outside without shelter, of wild animals, and stupid men. I knew before of course, but now I heard daily stories and anecdotes of what had happened to these warriors. Why one of them had lost his right ear, how that one had ended with such a terrible scar across his face, how many comrades and friends they had grieved for…

At some point even my intensive training and my exhaustion weren't enough to ban the nightmares anymore.

Sleep eluded me more and more.

And Nori wasn't there…

* * *

><p><strong>AN: I know I repeat myself a lot, but really thanks everyone. Your support is amazing and it gives me the will to always write more :)**

**So thanks everyone! **

**So... I know, I know...Nori left. But please don't hate me :) At least Amelia is getting trained properly, right? And you got a bit more of Danà too! Alright, I swear Nori won't disappear for long...maybe ;)**

**In this chapter I really wanted to get a little bit more of Amelia/Dori time. I hope it didn't sound too... I don't know, over dramatic or anything. I mostly wanted to show why the three can be so over reacting, and I wanted to insist on the harsh part of their life. **

**Anyway, I hope you liked it :)**

**I don't know when the next update will be. I'll try to update during the weekend. I hope you'll keep enjoying this story :) **


	29. A Day to Celebrate

**Everything belongs to JRR Tolkien, except for my OC and the plot**

* * *

><p>I had slept for maybe three or four hours before a stupid nightmare woke me. I was shivering and covered in cold sweat. I sighed, my mind still stuck on the last image of my dream; Nori was lying dead, a dirty lance protruding from his abdomen. His unseeing eyes were already clouded but they kept staring at me.<p>

I rubbed my face with my hands before I decided that staying in my dark room wouldn't help. I put on a light robe and pitter-pattered quickly to the kitchen. The stone under my feet was cold but I didn't mind, it anchored me to reality, helping me forget about that awful nightmare.

Dori, since he had realized I was often waking up in the middle of the night, had started to let a red ember in moss on a metal plate in the middle of the table. I just had to blow softly on it and brought the wick of a candle close enough to light it. From time to time I would remember how easy my life had been before. If I woke up in the middle of the night, I would just have to press a button to have white light coming from the light bulb in the kitchen. I would then use water from the tap, pour it in an electric kettle, and five minutes later I would have a warm mug of tea. Maybe I would even take some chocolate from the 'hidden' box on the top shelf of the cupboard. I smiled remembering how my aunt would hide the box to prevent me from eating chocolate when I was a child. My eyes grew teary when I remembered how my uncle would then pick me up silently, sitting me on his shoulder so I could grab it. Those were good times.

Deep in thought, I mechanically took a pan and used it to take water from the tank we had in the kitchen. At least we were lucky enough to have some pipes bringing fresh water in this tank, from what I had understood not every family had this in their kitchen. Bofur, Bombur and Bifur didn't. I then silently put the water to warm on the stove and retrieved chamomile and my mug. It was getting rather embarrassing, really, to suffer so much from stupid nightmares.

As soon as my drink was ready, I slowly made my way to the living room, sitting in my usual armchair close to the dying fire, facing the entrance door. It felt as if I was waiting for Nori to cross the threshold, and maybe it was what I was actually doing. I sipped peacefully the chamomile and let my thought wander.

Almost two months had passed since Nori had disappeared and I had sometimes to remind myself that there was nothing I could do. How I wished phones existed in this blasted land. That would make everything so much easier. I would just nag Nori so that he'll call me every two days. Being forced to wait with no possibility of knowing if something had happened was tearing me apart. It was very possible that Nori was currently dying in a forest or in a mountain, and I would never know. The fact that I couldn't go out and look for him was driving me mad, but what use would I be outside? First I had no idea where to look, and second if I did go out it was likely that I would die in some gruesome way. And with my luck that would happen while Nori would be safely back here.

So I resigned myself to wait and I hated every minute of it. I truly did.

Thankfully I was progressing in my training or I would actually be very depressed. The following day, I would be allowed for the first time to train with my first weapon ever. Well, maybe.

The dwarves had decided that a spear or staff would probably suit me better. They still hesitated between the two, unsure I would be able to lift the heavier spear properly enough to actually use it. They had explained as well that these would allow me to keep the enemies further away from me, well, if I used them efficiently.

I stared unseeingly at the fire, wondering whether Nori would be coming back soon, maybe even the following day. What a nice surprise it would be to come back for lunch and find him in the kitchen, sitting next to Ori on the wooden bench.

* * *

><p>It was only when Dori gently shook my shoulder the following morning that I realized I had fallen asleep on the armchair…again.<p>

I rubbed my eyes yawning while Dori patiently waited next to me, a cup with warm tea in his hand. When I took it and finally had a proper look at his face though, I saw his frown and responded with one of my own.

"Amelia, it's the third time this week I find you asleep here. It's not healthy. I'm worried."

"You're always worried Dori." I teased with a soft smile before explaining my actions. "I just had another nightmare yesterday and…I couldn't sleep so I came here to calm my nerves. Obviously I fell asleep a bit later."

"These nightmares…" He sighed and I saw how concerned he was about them. "Is there nothing you could do about it? Have you talked with Oin and Dís?"

I took the time to think about my answer. If I was back in my old world, I probably would have tried to ask a doctor for pills or something to help me sleep. Well, if I were back there I probably wouldn't have nightmares picturing bloody battles and gory cadavers anyway. But here? There was just so much, plants could do. Chamomile soothed me and calmed my nerves. I had even started to mix a bit of lavender to try and improve the calming effects. But I knew perfectly well that I wouldn't be able to sleep until I would have asserted that Nori was safe and sound, preferably here with us in Thorin's Halls.

"There's not much to do Dori. I'm just anxious and worried. The nightmares have nothing to do with what happened to me anymore."

It had taken time but it was the truth. After a bit more than a few months now, I wasn't dreaming about the events of Gorm anymore. I hadn't forgotten, far from it, and I had even discovered I was slightly queasy when sighting blood, but at least I wasn't seeing myself thrown in fits of destructive rage anymore.

I shivered remembering my worst nightmare so far had depicted me killing Nori. I had awoken screaming and trashing in my bed and it had taken literally hours to both Dori and Ori to calm me. It had been terrible.

Objectively I didn't think so much about the man I had killed. I knew my action had been the right one, never mind how wrong it was to kill someone. I had pondered at length and had admitted at some point that if I had had the choice back then, I would still have killed him. And now that I was spending so much time with warriors, listening to them and their stories, I knew that it was just something else I had to adapt to. Battles, fights to the death and gory violence in general were an inherent part of life here. Of course everyone died and it didn't matter in which world you lived. But in didn't necessarily involve swords, axes, bows and other primitive yet deadly weapons.

I had to prepare myself to that if I wanted to survive.

And I wanted to survive. I wanted to live here.

So I had to put my self-loathing aside and forget about what was right or wrong. There was no use in wallowing in the pain I had felt. I understood now how sadly normal my actions had been for anyone born in this world. I might never have to kill anyone again, and I did hope so, but if I had to do it to protect myself or my friends, I would. The day I admitted this to myself was somehow a life shattering moment. It wasn't everyday that someone accepted the fact that he was a murderer and would gladly be one if it meant never to suffer the loss of a friend.

Dori's voice brought me out of my thoughts and I realized he had disappeared in the kitchen. I followed him and saw he was speaking with Ori who was munching a bit of cheese while Dori was by the stove, grilling some bacon and sausages.

"I heard today you'll start to train with a staff?" Dori told me as I sat next to Ori, ruffling his hair just to force a pout on his face.

"Ah…yes. Well, that is, only if I manage to last against Gloin in a spar." I muttered before a thought struck me. "Do you want to come and watch it? The spar I mean."

I suddenly realized I really wanted Dori to come and witness how much progress I had made. I was still receiving my fair share of bruises every day, but now the dwarves had to put quite some efforts in it. It wasn't so hard anymore to run laps around the training grounds, the burn in my muscles wasn't so intense. Training everyday and almost all day long had been difficult but the effects on my body had been rather quick. I had more endurance, my breath was steadier during efforts and my heart rate didn't skyrocket after one lap.

I wanted Dori to see all that.

But most of all I wanted him to see me spar. I was quicker and even though my reflexes were not on par with those of the dwarves, they were a bit better now.

"I'll come." Dori said with a nod. "And I promise I won't stop the spar." He added with a smile.

I couldn't help but chuckle, just like Ori did.

"I'll come too, if you don't mind Amee."

"Of course I don't mind Ori. I'll be happy to have you there." I scoffed before adding. "I just hope I won't disappoint you."

"I know you won't." Dori simply said as Ori nodded in agreement.

I smiled broadly at them. It was amazing to feel so supported. Had Nori been here, this would have almost been perfect. The thief was the only thing that was still missing in the happy picture. As always, thinking of him saddened me, I felt my smile falter and quickly looked down at my plate. If the two brothers realized something was amiss, they didn't comment on it.

I quickly stood up and went back in my room to put on some clean clothes. Since I had started to train, I was always wearing the long tunic and breeches that the seamstresses had done for me. I had even asked for some more. It hadn't shocked anyone to see me wear those for it was rather obvious I couldn't train with dresses.

Two hours later I was in the training ground, I had run countless laps around the room and now Gloin was calling me. Next to Gloin stood Dwalin, his arms crossed over his chest and his usual grumpy frown on his face. I jogged toward the centre of the room and only then did I realize that there were some more people today than usual.

I could see that Dori and Ori were there, along with Balin, and the three of them were talking at the side of the room. I wasn't surprised to see that Fili, Kili and Gimli were here too, they trained almost every day, unless there was something special to do in the forges. But more surprising were the presence of Bofur, Bifur, Bombur, Oin, Dís and Danà; basically all my friends were there to see me during this last test. It suddenly felt as if I was actually passing some final exam.

Their presences cheered me up a bit but almost as soon as I felt glad for it, I felt my mood drop as I realized my eyes had been looking for Nori in the small crowd. His absence was starting to tear me apart. I tried to ignore the pain in my heart and the worrying scenarios in my head, and focused on Gloin's words.

"You'll spar with me at first and then Dwalin. If you can survive both spars, we'll take your training to the next step." His tone was serious and I listened attentively.

"How long will each spar last?" I enquired.

"Ten minutes each." Dwalin was the one to answer.

I swallowed thickly, suddenly nervous about it. Ten minutes against either of them would be hellish. Until now each time I had sparred, had been rather short. I wasn't sure I would be able to last against them, much less for ten minutes. But as I had no choice and as I was the one who so badly wanted to learn how to defend myself, I would do as they said. I would obey their rules.

I nodded sharply to let them know I had perfectly understood and Dwalin stepped back, joining my group of friends as Gloin and I faced each other.

"For the first spar, I'll be attacking with one sword. You're lucky it's not my weapon of choice, lass." He said joyously and I felt a smile pull my lips slightly upwards.

I honestly doubted I was lucky because Gloin, though he usually preferred axes, was just as good and deadly with a sword in his hands. But instead of worrying about it, I took a deep calming breath and a step back. My knees were slightly bent and I was ready to jump or sidestep in any direction. My hands weren't limply hanging at my sides; I had both my arms up in front of my torso, hands open, and ready to push away forearms or feet that would undoubtedly try to hit me. The only thing I wasn't allowed to touch and deviate with my hands was the wooden sword; it was rather obvious why this rule existed. In a real fight, no one in his right mind would try to block a sharpened sword with his bare hands.

Gloin seemed completely careless, and maybe he truly was. After all he had no personal interest in the spars' results. His only goal was to train me properly, he had told me so, and he was very serious about it too. Gloin wanted me to be efficient, there was no half-good with him. Either you did something perfectly right, or you didn't. If you didn't, then you had to practice, a lot, to do it properly the next time.

Even though I was ready, it still surprised me when he quickly jumped towards me, sword raised and already lowering in a dangerous arch directed at my head. This one was easy to dodge; I just had to take a small jump backwards.

After that first attack the rest of the spar turned into a blur. It was nothing but attacks after attacks directed towards various body parts. I jumped, bent, sidestepped to the point when I lost my sense of direction. I had no idea where in the training ground I was and truly didn't dare take a look around to check, one second of inattention would be enough for Gloin to 'kill' me.

And that's how I ended up in a rather tough position when my back violently hurt the stone wall. I gasped as air was forced out of my lungs by the shock. I saw Gloin smirk at my stupid mistake and I had all but a second to react before he would hit me. It would be utterly too idiotic to lose like this but I really didn't know what to do.

Dori and Ori were watching. For them I wanted to do it right. Even though it was utterly silly I wanted them to be proud. It would be a shame to have come so far and lose because of such a mistake.

In any proper action movie, the actress would somehow manage to jump above her enemy or slide between his legs…but this wasn't an action movie and I wasn't a gymnast. I was certain that Gloin would deliver the killing blow in the following second. But to my surprise he took a step toward me and leant on the wooden sword as if it were nothing more than a walking stick. Then he looked at me with a small smirk.

"Nicely done lass. You're alive and ten minutes passed already."

I blinked and was about to smile when his small smirk disappeared entirely to leave only a deep frown on his face.

"What have I told you countless times already? Pay attention to your surrounding! Don't let your opponent guide you where he wants!" Gloin snapped and I lowered my head.

"I know, I'm sorry." I mumbled.

"Don't tell me you're sorry. I'm not the one who'll die when I first encounter an enemy. And why will you die lass? Because you don't pay attention!"

I bit my lip. Gloin was harsh but entirely right. I had been lucky and he had already repeated countless times that I should pay more attention to where I put my feet while I spared. It had often cost me a few added bruises.

"Now. Back to the centre lass." Dwalin's gruff voice interrupted us.

I quickly strode to the centre of the training ground and chanced a glance towards Dori and Ori.

Ori offered me a huge encouraging smile which heartened me immediately. Dori smiled softly too and nodded. Somehow the simple knowledge that the two of them were here, encouraging me, seemed to renew my energy and I was surprised to be actually excited to spar with Dwalin. Maybe I had taken one too many hit on the head during training sessions.

The taller and bald dwarf walked towards me, a wooden sword in each hand and I gulped. If Gloin's spar had been hellish…well I didn't know how to qualify this match. Dwalin was always scary but right now he was really intimidating.

"Ten minutes lass. Pay attention. I won't let you get away with stupid mistakes."

Well. Fair enough.

I nodded and resumed my defensive position. I needed to be entirely focused.

Dwalin jumped at me and my first instinct was to bolt away.

But I couldn't, so I dodged his attack and managed to feint to his right before sidestepping to his left. In just a few minutes I was already feeling overwhelmed. Dwalin seemed to be in my head. Each step I took in any direction, he was already there, attacking anew.

It was scary.

I did manage to stay in the middle of the ground despite the pressure he put to force me to the walls. At some point I stumbled and fell on one knee. Several things happened at the same moment then. As I stumbled at first, I somehow registered from the corner of my eye that Bofur was pointing something to Dori. Inadvertently my eyes followed the direction he pointed to as my knee slammed on the ground violently. I winced at the pain that shot up my thigh.

Dwalin took a step towards me and raised both his arms, readying himself to administer the killing blow with both his sword. I knew he would manage to slow his attack so that it wouldn't hurt too much when the wood would hit. Even though he was careful not to hit too violently, Gloin and Dwalin both believed that a few bruises were useful to help me learn.

At the moment though, I didn't think about this.

Looking away from my own fight, my eyes fell on the figure half hidden by Dwalin's large frame. Still I could recognize this silhouette anywhere.

Nori!

As Dwalin started to lower his arms I absentmindedly jumped back to my feet…which was a terrible instinct really.

It hurt!

Pain exploded in my head as my skull collided violently with Dwalin's chin. Falling on the dwarf I ended up destabilizing him and we both fell to the floor. As he fell backwards, I stumbled once more and fell on top of the older warrior, hitting my forehead against what probably was his nose. At that time though, I really didn't pay attention to such details.

I immediately rolled of him and brought both my hands to the top of my head, biting hard on my lip but not quite managing to muffle a whimper.

For a second everything was silent before a flurry of noise erupted from everywhere around. I was still clutching my own head when I felt hands on mine, forcing them away. Tears pooled in my eyes and I didn't try to prevent them from falling. Who knew that Dwalin had such a hard jaw? I didn't pay attention to the voices around until one of them caught my attention.

"Amelia, are you alright?"

"Do I look alright?" I couldn't help but snap at Dís.

Well I tried to snap but it really only was a pitiful whimper.

"Stop gesticulating and let us examine you." Oin for his part managed to snap at me perfectly normally.

"Move away all of you. Let us do our job. She doesn't need to be crowded." Dís admonished.

I guessed the other dwarves were trying to come closer to me, but at the moment with all the tears blurring my sight, I couldn't tell what was going on around me. The only things I knew for certain were that Dís and Oin were there and that my head hurt.

Ten or so minutes later Oin concluded that I will only have a bump and that there was nothing to do, except maybe put some cool water and witch hazel's ointment. He did tell me that an infusion of feverfew might help too, but all in all there was nothing to do. When I finally looked around I realized that most of the dwarves were laughing. I followed their gazes to the surprising image of Dwalin, still sitting on the floor, with Dís pressing a bloodied cloth against his nose.

Balin was the first to speak.

"Well my dear. I haven't seen anyone quite so perfectly head-butt my brother in decades."

All the dwarves chuckled and finally my gaze met the grey eyes I had been looking for in this crowd.

He was hiding in the shadows as usual, slightly separated from the group yet close to his two brothers. I immediately forgot the pain that still radiated through my skull and the one that had clenched my heart with worries these past weeks. He was frowning slightly until the moment I smiled widely at him. Then I saw the usual sparkle of mischief in his eyes and he smiled softly. My heart missed a bit and I jumped back to my feet, impatient to give him a hug to welcome him home.

Obviously things didn't go quite as planned and as soon as I was standing my vision blurred and I felt my stomach churn. I staggered and was about to fall when two arms encircled my waist and helped to stabilize me.

I looked up at Kili's face and I saw him smirk playfully at me before he teased lightly.

"And here you are in my arms yet again."

I took a moment to breathe deeply and with Kili's help I was once more stable on my feet.

"What can I say, royalty always made my knees go weak…" I said absentmindedly in a repeat of our usual banter.

As soon as I was certain I wouldn't fall again I stepped towards the three brothers. Dori immediately grabbed my elbow to keep me from loosing balance. He seemed much more relaxed right now than he had been in weeks. The older dwarf was smiling at me kindly and, even though he had no real medical knowledge, insisted on examining my head too. I let him look, bending a bit so that he didn't have any problem seeing the bump.

Ori had a large smile, the kind of which I hadn't seen on his face since Nori's departure. He was almost bouncing on his feet in excitation. To be honest I could relate to that sentiment and, had I not knocked myself stupid on Dwalin's head, I would be happily bouncing too. I winced.

Right now the simple thought of bouncing was enough to make me nauseous.

My eyes though quickly went back to Nori. I almost frowned when I saw that his expression seemed more guarded than it had been just a minute ago. He was back to smirking and he still had the same laid back demeanour, but there was something in the depth of his eyes I couldn't quite identify. It somehow felt as if he was angry about something, though I had no idea what could anger him quite so quickly.

I chose to ignore it and simply let my happiness at his return show. If Nori was back that meant I didn't have to worry anymore. I could barely resist the urge I had to throw myself in his arms. I let my eyes roam over his form, he didn't seem to be hurt anywhere; I couldn't see any cuts or any blood on his clothes. But that didn't mean he hadn't been hurt. I would have to examine him later. My mind was already reviewing what plants or ointments I should give him depending on what injury he might have. Was his wrist alright?

Unconsciously I took a deep breath and a weight that I hadn't realized was there, lifted from my chest, allowing me to breath normally for what suddenly like ages.

I was about to talk, to welcome him properly home, when Dís' exasperated voice caught my attention.

"Let me reset your nose straight you oaf. Remove your hands."

"I'b fi'e Dís. Leabe be alo'e." Dwalin grunted.

"What? I didn't get any of that. Now move your hands." She ordered once more.

When I saw Dwalin's bloodied face and Dís swiftly set his nose back in place I felt a lump in my throat. Oddly the sight of real blood didn't upset my stomach as much as I thought it would. No, what was worrying me was something else entirely. I wasn't too sure about how the dwarf would react. Would he be angry at me? From what I knew about dwarves he might actually be happy that I managed to break his nose. Yes, dwarves were weird but I was getting used to it.

As soon as Dís stepped aside, Dwalin was on his feet and strode towards me.

"You didn't last ten minutes lass, but you did well." He gruffly said and I could only nod.

"You were lucky both times. That's not good." Gloin commented.

"Well, luck is important too." Bofur tried to intervene.

I smiled at him as he winked playfully at me. It made my smile widen as I looked at Nori, expecting him to do the same gesture. I felt my joy falter when I realized he wasn't even looking at me. What had I expected? He was observing Ori, who was discussing the spars with Kili, Fili and Gimli. He probably had really missed his brother, but why was he looking at him with a small frown on his face?

I put this information in one corner of my mind as I paid once more attention to the older dwarves.

"Yeah, but luck isn't really reliable now, is it?" Gloin countered immediately. "She didn't last ten minutes against you. I say she should try it again."

Dwalin seemed to ponder on this and observed me for a moment.

I didn't want to start another spar right now. I was still dizzy after the shock against my skull and, if I were entirely honest, I wanted to go back home and spend some time with the three brothers. Nori just came back, surely they would allow me a break.

"Come on lass, back to the centre." Dwalin grunted.

I knew it must have shown on my face how unhappy and annoyed I was to obey. I glanced toward Dori but the dwarf had promised me not to intervene and, even though I saw he wanted to stop the training, he didn't utter a word. It was crystal clear that my guardian was battling with himself, but I knew I wouldn't receive help from him.

It was Balin though who decided to voice his doubts.

As the dwarves would say, 'Mahal bless my two guardians.'

"She just hurt her head brother. Surely you see how unfair it would be to force her to spar now."

"She can do it."

"You might not use your head brother, but some do. Finish this spar tomorrow if you must. For my part I think she can start training with a staff." My second guardian insisted.

"I think so too." Oin added then, looking pointedly at his brother while holding his ear trumpet firmly. "Now she should rest. Human's skulls tend to be more fragile than ours."

I reminded myself not to get offended by such a comment. 'Fragile' wasn't an adjective I liked to be used to define me, or my body. When Dís agreed, Dwalin and Gloin finally relented and allowed me to leave the premise with the three brothers. As soon as we were alone in the corridor I caught Nori's arm and started to speak with him.

"What took you so long? Where did you go?" I asked, unable to stop a huge smile from tugging at my lips.

Nori was close. He wouldn't run away. He wouldn't disappear in the next second. He was here, with me, with us. He was home.

Nori looked at me and at first, I noticed the same guarded expression and the same unidentified glint in his eyes, but both soon changed into his usual mischievous and cheeky demeanour. Still, he didn't answer and simply winked at me.

My heart leapt in my chest.

"When did you arrive? Did you see my spar with Gloin?" I kept on asking him.

As Nori didn't immediately answer, Dori gave his opinion instead.

"Your spar with Gloin was interesting. But he's right, you should be more careful." He said in a calm and serious tone.

"But she wasn't even hit once. That's quite good." Ori commented to defend me and I smiled at him.

"Aye, but she ended up with her back to a wall and no escape route." Nori dryly replied.

I looked at him when he spoke. It was strange. Maybe it was because I hadn't heard it in weeks, but I hadn't realized until that moment that someone could miss the sound of a voice. Nori's grave and soft tones were oddly soothing and calming. Maybe the hit on my head had been stronger than Oin thought. I shook my head slightly and smiled brightly at him.

"So you saw?"

He shrugged and kept his gaze on the corridor as he answered.

"Aye, I saw the end."

I opened my mouth to continue talking with him, but Dori was faster. He changed the topic completely and I didn't know how to react to his sudden cold look.

"Did you go see Thorin?" Dori asked Nori in a clipped tone.

I felt Nori tense under my finger and I unconsciously squeezed his arm a bit. He glanced at me before he looked at his older brother.

"There was no reason to. I'm still free to come and go as I want. Aren't I?" Nori's voice was tensed too.

"Sure. Made some profit this time? What did you steal? Gold from an old lady? Toys from a child?"

I looked at Ori. The poor dwarf's head was low and his face reflected his forlorn thoughts. His shoulders were slumped too and he walked without uttering a sound. My eyes shifted to look at Dori and it was easy to see how angry he was. His fists were clenched and his brow furrowed. It wasn't hard to guess that this wasn't the first time the two brothers had such a discussion. Somehow I was reminded of several occasions when I had heard Dori and Nori ushering angrily at one another.

Still, at the moment I didn't want to deal with that. Right now we should all simply be glad to see Nori was apparently unharmed. That was what mattered most to my humble opinion. And I knew that Dori was relieved to see his little brother was back and healthy. I had seen the older dwarf being more worried and concerned at each passing day. I hadn't been the only one imagining what terrible things could occur and Dori knew probably better than me what could actually happen to his brother.

I knew perfectly that Dori had been sick with worry. It had been painfully obvious in the way he looked at Nori's usual chair with a frown on his face. I knew that it wasn't anger or shame that shone in his eyes when Nori had been absent.

But apparently right after Nori's return, Dori seemed unable to express anything except for his anger towards the thief.

It was rather odd to see the both of them so unable to communicate but Dori had a knack for saying exactly what would cause Nori to stop talking entirely.

I didn't want to deal with such things that day.

I wanted to discuss with Nori and I felt that we should all simply take some time together, preferably without the two older bickering together.

"What do you want to eat?" I asked, hoping to divert their attention.

Ori glanced at me with an arched eyebrow but seemed to understand what I wanted to do. Dori and Nori though, were too busy exchanging snapped comments.

"I said, what do you want to eat?" I repeated a little more loudly.

We were almost at the door to our home and still neither of them reacted at my question. It even seemed as if Nori had forgotten I was holding his arm. I took a glimpse toward Ori who simply shrugged in a defeated way. He probably had witnessed his fair share of fights between his two brothers.

I wasn't going to let their stupid banter spoil my happiness at seeing Nori again.

As we were only a few steps away from the threshold I decided to simply yank Nori's arm as hard as I could. The dwarf stumbled and was stopped mid-sentence while I stopped walking altogether. Now that I had gathered his attention I let his arm go and crossed my own, glaring at both of them while Ori observed the scene from the side.

"Now you two listen and listen well. Nori just came back and there is absolutely no way I'm going to listen to you two yelling at each other. Understood?" I was glaring at the both of them and they looked at me, clearly surprised. "I'm going to go in, with Ori, and we're going to go in the kitchen to prepare a nice lunch to celebrate Nori's return. Either you forget about this argument and you follow us, or you go eat elsewhere." I admonished the both of them with a determined tone.

I then simply grabbed Ori's arm, opened the door and slammed it shut behind us.

Right after, I felt slightly dizzy and thankfully Ori was here to stabilize me as I staggered slightly. I looked up to thank him and frowned a bit.

Ori was looking at me with an odd expression that I simply couldn't identify. I shrugged and ignored his questioning glance. I honestly was rather annoyed by the two brothers' stupid dispute. Of course I understood Dori's point of view but why couldn't he simply say that he was worried when Nori disappeared? Maybe he had said so repeatedly and it had never deterred Nori. But then, why did I get the feeling that Nori never spoke about his motivations? I had this hunch that neither Dori nor Ori knew about those items that Nori was looking for.

Even though Dori had made clear he saw me as a member of their family now, it wasn't my place to scold them or put my nose in their businesses. If Nori never said this information to his brother, then I had no right to share the secret. If Dori wanted to react angrily, then he should be allowed to do so. That didn't mean that I had to put up with it though, and if they wanted to fight, they could do it. I was fine with it. It didn't concern me. But they would have to fight elsewhere.

"You sounded just like Ma' when she was angry at Da'..." Ori breathed out rather suddenly.

I glanced at him and felt the corner of my mouth being pulled in a small, tired smile.

"Don't tell me you enjoy listening to their arguments, I won't believe it." I replied.

He didn't say anything but the small smile he offered me was enough for me to understand he was glad I had interrupted his brothers.

We were both in the main cellar, choosing what to eat today, when we heard the entrance door open. I peered out and saw Dori and Nori enter the kitchen. They were both pouting like children would after having been scolded. It made my smile grew and I nudged Ori discreetly, pointing at his brothers. When Ori's sweet smile was completely back on his face, we both got out, arms full with a variety of food.

The four of us immediately set up the table for lunch in silence. It wasn't awkward at all, on the contrary, it felt peaceful and when I caught a look at the two older dwarves I realized that both their pouts were gone. Nori's face was serene and Dori even had a small smile. Well, apparently domestic tasks were enough to placate them, that was a good thing to know.

"So, how's the training going?" Nori finally asked me.

I smiled broadly and took the seat next to his.

"Well…"

As I started to explain to him everything that had happened during his absence, Dori put some sausages on the stove and Ori came back from the second cellar with three huge tankards filled to the brim with dark brown ale. No more heated words were exchanged during that lunch. We spent an agreeable moment all together and soon enough the dwarves were laughing loudly while eating and drinking and I was listening to them happily.

Dori was right. He had been right all those weeks ago when we had talked together.

This place was my home in all possible ways. These men, these three dwarves were my family now.

I had always been an only child, rather lonely in the little town house where I lived with my aunt and uncle. My dog had been my only friend for a rather long time but he had died when I was still nothing but a child. In my mind, what I felt for Ori and Dori were the exact feeling I would have felt for close family members. Ori definitely was as close to me as a brother could. Dori…Dori was older and was somehow a strange mix between a caring older brother and an odd and friendly uncle.

My gaze turned slightly and I observed Nori from the corner of my eyes.

If I considered Ori and Dori like brothers…what place had Nori taken?

* * *

><p>It was only later that afternoon that I had some time alone with Nori. After lunch, the thief had disappeared for a few hours and just before he came back, Dori and Ori both had to leave to go to work. Dori had quite a lot of request for mercenaries to organize and Ori was working more than ever with all the merchants and artisans, counting and recounting the supplies and products ready to be sold.<p>

For my part I remained at home. Dís and Oin had all but ordered me to stay put today and honestly I didn't mind that much. Whenever I would move too quickly, my head would spin. Thus I waited patiently in the living room, my healing satchel on the small table next to my armchair, ready to catch Nori as soon as he would pass the threshold.

To his credit, he didn't even try to complain or resist when he saw me as he entered the room.

"I swear I was careful." He said simply before taking a seat just in front of me.

I had observed him when he had crossed the room and hadn't detected any limping, I could only assume that if he had been injured, it was only minor.

"How's your wrist?" I asked immediately and with a serious tone.

Right now I wasn't Amelia, the ward, friend and maybe family member. I was Amelia the healer who had been trained in modern university as well as by the Master Healer of Thorin's Halls. Right then, I meant business and Nori was a patient.

It was both odd and difficult to see him as such.

"Fine."

I trusted Nori with many things, my life for example, but if there was one topic I would never entirely trust him with, it was his own health. I gingerly took the arm that had been injured a while ago. It should be completely healed now, unless Nori had used it repeatedly and had put some strain on it. As I put some pressure on the articulation and manipulated his hand, I observed Nori's face, looking for any twitch or slight wince he would try to dissimulate.

I couldn't help but smile when I saw nothing but his smug smirk.

"Told you it was fine." He dared to tease me.

I met his eyes and saw them twinkle with mischief. My heart missed a beat and I released his hand from my hold. Looking anywhere but his eyes I cleared my throat lightly before asking him several questions.

"Well, answer honestly. Did you participate in any fight? Are you injured? Did you hurt yourself?"

"No." He replied immediately.

I narrowed my eyes at him, forgetting about mischievous eyes and smug smirks. He had answered awfully quickly, which was odd, and a simple 'no' to answer all three questions. Nori, I was certain, was a better liar than me; he was a thief after all. Following this logic the fact that he answered so quickly was indeed strange; it felt as if something unnerved him. As if he wanted to be elsewhere too. I wondered briefly what could be bothering him but chose not to voice my concern.

"Do I have to make you strip in order to see for myself?" I asked, quirking an eyebrow at him.

I was surprised to see him blush at that. I bit my lower lip, feeling a bit awkward rather suddenly, though I honestly didn't know why. He clearly avoided to look at me for a moment and then decided to answer, a short moment later.

"I'm fine. I didn't get in any fight. I swear I wasn't injured or hurt."

I nodded. I couldn't force him to remove his clothes and he didn't appear to be wounded. He hadn't even seemed dishevelled when he arrived earlier.

"Did you…" I hesitated, whispering softly. "Did you find what you were looking for?"

I saw a flash of hurt cross his features before he managed to school them in a rather blank mask. I didn't really need to hear his answer to guess it.

"No."

Nori had tensed but immediately after he pronounced that one word, I saw him somehow deflate. His shoulders slumped and he sighed, sounding rather tired.

"Did you at least find anything that will help you?" I insisted in a soft voice.

He took a moment to answer. I met his eyes for a brief moment before the both of us looked elsewhere.

"Maybe…"

I didn't say anything. What could I say anyway? Whatever word I could utter would feel meaningless. I bit my lower lip once more and was wondering whether Nori would leave again soon when he talked again.

"This is…" He stopped, sighed and hesitated before continuing. "This is the last option I have actually. If I can't find it next time…" He shook his head, but I didn't know whether it was annoyance or sadness that made him. "If I can't find it, then I'll have to start back from scratch."

As I heard these words, and saw how upset Nori was, I felt my hand move towards him on its own volition. I gingerly took his hands in mine. I didn't look at him, staring at our hands instead, when I whispered softly.

"I hope you'll find it soon Nori."

He squeezed my hands gently in his and I found it in myself to look up and meet his eyes.

The gratitude and the intensity behind the grey orbs stole my breath away for a moment. It was uncanny how much his eyes and the feelings hidden in them could affect me.

We stayed like this, looking at each other for a moment. A rather long moment I thought, but I couldn't be sure. I truly didn't care.

It was the sound of a key in the keyhole that woke us from our daze and we both let go of the other. As Dori came in, followed unsurprisingly by Bofur, Bombur and Bifur, I quickly gathered my satchel and, after greeting our friends, went to put it back in my room.

That evening was spent rather cheerfully. As Nori was here, the other dwarves decided to play some music and I greatly enjoyed it.

I couldn't help but wonder though, what was Nori's place in my life?

* * *

><p>After Nori's return, life was once more normal. I could finally sleep again without being awoken by terrible nightmares and I concentrated some more on my training. After I managed to spar for ten minutes with both Gloin and Dwalin, my two teachers decided I could start learning how to use a long staff.<p>

The weapon wasn't really one. At least the one I was given at once wouldn't seem like much on a battlefield. It was a simple white wooden staff that had been carefully polished. It was rather long, when I put one extremity on the floor beside my feet, the other extremity was almost a foot higher than the top of my head. Learning how to manipulate such a thing was a whole new level of nightmarish training.

Every morning I would continue to train normally, running and sparing barehanded. And my whole afternoons were now solely dedicated to trainings with the staff. At first I had to learn several simple moves that I then tried to replicate endlessly until the dwarf teaching me at the moment thought it perfect enough. Dwalin and Gloin were still with me every morning, but in the afternoon, they were sometimes replaced by Bifur or Gloin who came to teach me how to use this specific weapon. When Bifur was here, there always was another older dwarf present to translate.

I was more exhausted than ever and I ended up falling asleep in the kitchen more than once, my head resting on my bent arm near my plate. The first time it happened was rather embarrassing too.

* * *

><p>Training that day had been particularly exhausting. My legs and feet still hurt from that morning's training session while I could barely lift my arms. My muscles protested at each and every move and it was a feat already that I managed to come back to our house. I limped to my room, crossing the kitchen with barely a stiff nod to greet the three brothers who observed me carefully as I passed.<p>

Once in my room I put my staff in a corner, leaning it against the wall, before I went back to the kitchen and let my body fall on the bench next to Nori.

"Hard day?" Nori chuckled and I glared at him.

"Here Amelia, eat, it'd do you good." Dori ignored his brother and filled my plate with a large portion of roast meat with potatoes, one of the few vegetables the dwarves ate gladly.

"Thanks Dori." I muttered before stifling a yawn.

"Was it that bad today?" Ori enquired gently.

I sighed and rubbed my eyes tiredly. Even that simple move hurt. Why did I want to train again?

"Dwalin decided today was a good day to start the sparing session."

"Oh." The three brothers chorused in a sympathetic way.

"I spared with Bifur."

Ori winced, expressing exactly how I would feel from now on when I would have to train against the old warrior. This dwarf might have a piece of axe in his head, but damn it, he knew how to fight. It seemed Bifur didn't know how to play nice in a fight. At first it was fine and he would stick to the moves he had shown me, but every time, at some point, he would lose it completely. Somehow I was awed by his abilities. He was a true warrior that much was obvious. And if my brain hadn't registered it, my body most certainly had. I hadn't fallen that many times in weeks. I was probably covered in bruises.

Thankfully one of the first lessons Oin had insisted I learned was to be careful of my hands, especially my fingers. I couldn't agree more. My fingers were too important if I wanted to be able to operate or heal people. After receiving several hit on my knuckles I had quickly learned to pay attention as to where the other's staff would hit mine.

Dori looked worried and narrowed his eyes at me, probably trying to find out whether I had been hurt or not. Nori for his part frowned and remained silent. I was too tired to pay attention to them, or reassure them.

I barely ate and just let my head rest on my arm while I listened absentmindedly to the brothers' talks. Soon enough I was lulled into sleep.

I awoke later with a slight start and my heart missed a beat when I realized I was currently in Nori's arms.

"What…" I gasped.

Nori looked at me and swiftly pushed my door open with his foot. He strode to my bed and lowered me gently on the mattress. I blinked sleepily at him, my brain fogged by sleep, but I managed to hear him whisper softly.

"Sleep Mizimul."

I let my eyes shut close and I thought I felt warm fingers brush my cheek, but I honestly couldn't be sure.

The next morning, Ori teased me about the event, saying that falling asleep during a meal was definitely not dwarvish behaviour. According to him, a dwarf would never forgo a meal for sleep.

* * *

><p>Weeks passed without me really being conscious of it. Dori left us for two weeks, going with one of the first merchants' caravan to a town west of the mountains. I remained in Thorin's Halls, still too weak and helpless to follow him. I took my training seriously and I did see some results as I now was able to use the long staff to deflect blows quite efficiently, even though it was the only thing I knew how to do.<p>

Nori remained in the Halls too. I knew he would leave soon again, but he apparently wasn't in a hurry.

It was a morning like every other for me. Dori had come back a week ago and everything was going on as usual. But when I woke up, I immediately realized that something was different. Usually one of the brothers would come and wake me, this time though, none of them did. I opened the small shutter and saw light stream in my little room, alerting me that the sun had probably been up for quite some time.

I frowned and quickly washed up a bit before putting on some clean clothes.

It wasn't really a problem that they hadn't woken me, from what I had observed people came and went in the training ground as they pleased. It was only because I wanted to learn and learn fast that I went all day long every day. I did wonder whether Dwalin and Gloin would grunt at me for arriving later than usual, meanwhile walking to the closed kitchen door.

I stopped for a second as I was about to push it open.

I frowned a bit and sniffed.

There was an unusual smell in the air. Nothing bad. Quite the contrary actually, it smelt wonderful though I had no idea what it was.

Gingerly I pushed the wooden door, wondering what was going on.

As the door creaked open, I froze. The kitchen was empty. Empty as in the table and benches had disappeared and there was no one around. Actually if it weren't for the fact I knew perfectly where I was, and for this maddeningly tasty smell that permeated the room, I would have thought I had entered another person's house.

My gaze flicked immediately towards the door leading to the living room. It was closed. I quickly strode there, hoping that the second room still had all its furniture. Had the dwarves been robbed? But, putting aside the fact that there was just one known dwarf thief, and that he wouldn't bother stealing his own furniture, it did seem improbable that anyone would want to steal a table and benches. Wooden ones at that, it wasn't really luxury item.

I didn't know what I had expected to see when I opened the door. But I knew it certainly wasn't that.

All the furniture had been pushed away. The small coffee tables put near the entrance door and the armchairs were either lined on the two smaller sides of the table, the benches as usual were on the two longer ones. The tabletop disappeared completely under the sheer amount of food and plates that were put on it. I could see cakes of various sides, meat and bread, as usual, cheeses, fresh and dried fruits too. My eyes widened when I saw the barrel of what could only be ale just a step away from me.

I blinked and then looked at the people around.

All their faces were displaying how happy and smug they were at the moment. I opened my mouth to talk, say anything, ask aloud what was going on, and only then did I realize that they were utterly silent. How odd for dwarves to stay calm.

I took another step in the room, baffled at the sight and feeling completely lost. What had I missed? What was going on?

I looked at my friends and realized they were all here; Bofur and Bifur were each holding one of Bombur's arms as the later was eyeing the feast with envy shining in his eyes. Danà and Gloin were holding each other and Danà smiled kindly at me when she met my gaze. Gimli was here too, smirking proudly and almost bouncing on his feet while Fili and Kili exchanged a smug and cheeky glance before smirking toothy grins at me. Just near Kili was Dís who was obviously trying to keep her sons in check and next to her stood Oin who was eyeing his ear trumpet before shaking it wildly. I could only guess that something was obstructing it. Balin was looking at the healer with amusement, shaking his head while chuckling softly.

And finally, closest to me, stood the three brothers. Dori looked smug too with his little smirk that pulled at only one corner of his lips. Ori was actually bouncing and clapping lightly with his hands in front of his chest. His smile was broader than ever and his eyes shone with mirth.

Lastly, my befuddled gaze turned to Nori who leant against the wall, half in the shadows. When I met his grey eyes I couldn't help but smile a bit. He smirked at me and winked playfully, leaving me just as flabbergasted as I could be.

Finally Dori cleared his throat and spoke.

"Amelia, we don't know when your birthday is. We never asked." He started to say in a calm voice, confusing me further.

Had they picked a date like this? It was sweet and all but still it was a bit odd. Besides, why did they want to celebrate my birthday anyway? It was a nice thought, but what had triggered it? What had made them think of this?

"So we decided to celebrate this day with you instead, for you appeared in this world a year ago."

I blinked at him, mouth agape.

A year?

* * *

><p><strong>AN : So...I have no idea how I could thank you all. The reactions for last chapter overwhelmed me. You are all amazing, and I truly want to let you know how much it helps and it means to read all your comments. THANK YOU! **

**I'm not sure whether I forgot someone when I answered to the reviews, or if I send thanks to the same person twice... In both cases, sorry and thanks :)**

**Thanks a Lot to all the guests who reviewed too! (Journey, RandomReader, Mary, the three nameless Guests and Kelwtim2spar) **

**Alright...this was actually really hard. I spent hours on this chapter, I haven't had so much trouble editing a chapter in quite a while. To be honest, I'm not sure of the quality of today's work. I hope you did enjoy it though.**

**I know some of you expected Nori to be hurt :) or maybe you didn't think I would make him come back quite so rapidly. I hope I did surprise you a bit this time :) **

**I have no idea when I'll be able to update next. I really want to add several things to the next chapter and I'm not sure I'll have time. So the next update won't probably be before next Thursday (sorry...really sorry, I know the updates are a bit slow these past weeks, but I really can't do otherwise.)**

**I hope you enjoyed the chapter.**

**Thanks a lot for the support!**


	30. Calm before the Storm

**It all belongs to JRRTolkien (except for my OC and the plot)**

* * *

><p>A year?<p>

Had it truly been so long?

As Dori said those words it dawned on me that indeed it had. It felt as if I had spent years here already and at the same time that I arrived recently.

One year only. One year already.

Somehow it felt like an ominous moment.

I was happy here, I liked it here. I liked the people and even though I had already suffered my fair share of troubles and pains, I seemed to actually like this world and time. I felt that I fit in there. Even though they had no technology, no electricity and so many other little things were missing from my life, I couldn't help but enjoy the simple life more. Of course I cursed when I happened to bath too late or too early and there was no heated water. Of course I missed modern medicinal equipments. Of course I missed fridges and microwaves and restaurants and shops and so many other facilities and objects of what had been my daily life a year ago. Of course I wouldn't know how my favourite TV show would end.

But did those really matter?

In the end they did not.

What mattered most for me was family.

And yes, most of all I missed my aunt and uncle. They had been my parents. At a time when I had been alone, they had been there. I couldn't remember my birth parents' faces. Here I had no picture with me to remind me of my mother and father. And I had none to help me remember my aunt's and uncle's. I knew it was only a matter of time before their faces became nothing but a blur in my mind. Somehow it had already started. Realizing it was quite scary.

They had taken care of me. They brought me in their home as their own. I missed them, but the ache had become somewhat dull, ever present but far from the sharp cutting pain from the first few months. I missed them, I still thought about them, but they weren't a part of my life anymore…if that made sense at all. It was as if they had died, though I knew they were, hopefully, still alive.

It wasn't a life shattering moment. It was just simply the moment when I truly realized that I had somehow given up on my previous world. It was in the past. My present, and I hoped my future too, were here. My life was now in this strange, medieval world were dwarves and other creatures apparently existed, though I still had to see any of those. It was a place where men were stupid and prejudiced, or at least those I met were. It was in here, where medicine consisted of mixing plants together and hoping for the best, where fire was the primary source of energy and where taking a hot bath was luxury.

A whole year had passed and when I thought about it, I had to admit that my friends had been right several months ago. I had changed. I wasn't the same person anymore. For one, I had killed and poisoned people. I accepted it now, even though I still thought it was wrong and despicable, I accepted that it was part of life in this world. I couldn't survive here if I didn't adapt and if I had to adapt to the cruel and gruesome violence of this era, then I would. I would cry myself to sleep after the necessary deeds were done, but I would do those despicable deeds anyway.

The simple fact I had hardened enough to accept this was proof of a change in me. But thankfully I hadn't simply turned into a blood thirsty monster. I knew I was cheerier here. The dwarves made everything seem so simple. Laugh and jokes were a part of their life here; they made me forget about all the hardships and pain. I enjoyed their happy ways a lot. I wasn't introverted anymore. I dared to tease others and didn't mind being teased so much now that I knew it wasn't done meanly.

I was even able to speak my mind now, well, most of the time at least.

Yes. This whole year had changed me.

And then I realized how much I truly meant it when I said to myself I liked this place.

I had no hope anymore to ever go back to my old world. The dwarves had no idea how to send me back, and I didn't have that much of a will to go back either. I realized I then I had never even tried to find my way back. I had followed the dwarves as if it were the most natural thing to do in the world. I hadn't tried. Maybe I had been relieved to leave my troubles behind and forget about them? Maybe it was because I was curious? I didn't have an answer. I didn't even care about it.

I was left here with a choice both hard and easy to make.

And I made it.

I let go.

I let go of my past and everything in it.

I chose to live here, with this new extended, slightly annoying and definitely noisy family that had accepted me with open arms and a contract.

My past was nothing more than that, past.

I realized I had made this choice unconsciously a while ago already, but to admit it to myself had been the final and first step. Final step of an old, dream-like life where roads were paved and asphalted, where mechanic contraptions allowed people to fly, and where you could communicate with someone at the other end of the world instantaneously. And it was the first step of another life where honour and bravery were not mere notions, where people would do literally anything for their kin, and where life was harsh but so simple at the same time.

It took me maybe a few seconds to realize all this and the dwarves all sing-sang 'happy birthday' merrily, well it wasn't really the same song I knew, but the feelings and meanings were there. Apparently it had been decided that this day would be my birthday for this world. I didn't mind. It was fitting. In an odd, metaphorical way I had indeed been born again in this world.

Ori jumped towards me and embraced me happily and I smiled as I returned the hug. All the dwarves came closer and as soon as Ori let me go, I was engulfed in Kili's arms. He spun me around, earning a startled yelp and a laugh.

"Kili you oaf, let me go." I stammered between laughs.

"Kili!" Dís intervened and the young dwarf finally relented, but not before planting a noisy kiss on my cheek.

I laughed some more at hearing the loud "mwa" he made before he let me go. I was unbalanced when both my feet met the ground again, but another dwarf was here to help me. From there on it was a series of hugs and pats on the back and the top of my head. I felt as if my heart would burst from sheer happiness if that were possible.

But among all the joy, I couldn't help but notice that Nori hadn't moved. He seemed frozen and when my gaze found him, he was staring at the floor, an odd expression on his face. No one else seemed to realize it, but I saw the strange mixture of pain, doubt and anger. What had brought this?

At that moment he shifted and his eyes met mine. His whole demeanour changed, taking this guarded expression I had seen only a few times and only recently. I quirked an eyebrow at him and he slowly smirked, before winking at me. Even though this was his typical self, something felt odd. Still I responded in the same way I did before, I smiled broadly at him.

I couldn't really ponder about this as once more the dwarves surrounded me. Dori cleared his throat and I immediately focused back on him.

"So, we know you're twenty-six and that we're not supposed to offer you any presents, but…"

I couldn't help but quirk an eyebrow when I heard that. I didn't really mind not receiving any presents. Actually, now that I reflected about it, I hadn't even thought to ask about their birthdays, and had never given them anything. I felt suddenly a bit guilty. My aunt would have admonished me severely. It was most impolite. And on a personal level I was a bit ashamed about it. Why hadn't I thought of that? Why hadn't I tried to offer them presents? Well, now that I actually pondered on this topic, I wondered what I could give to each of them.

I was brought back to the present discussion as Dori was suddenly silent. He probably saw my slightly puzzled look because he then stopped.

"Amelia?" Dori only asked, tilting his head a bit.

I quickly shook mine and put back my smile on.

"What is it? You seemed to be thinking about something."

"Well, it's nothing really. It's just that what you said surprised me." I answered truthfully.

I didn't address the matter of their birthdays. I would ask Ori when the two of us would be alone. I could count on his honesty and discretion. He would tell me whether or not the other had been offended.

In the meantime Dori frowned and seemed to think back about what he said.

"Don't you celebrate birthdays in your world?" Kili asked with what could only be described as horror on his face.

I couldn't help it and I laughed when I looked at him.

"Of course we do!"

"Then you don't offer presents at all?" Fili asked surprised.

Before I could answer Ori piped in.

"I read in a book that the hobbit folks don't receive presents but offer them. Do you do that?"

Fili suddenly mirrored his younger brother's horrified expression while the older dwarves rolled their eyes at them. Balin was the next one to speak.

"What surprised you my dear?"

"Just the fact you said you weren't supposed to offer presents." I answered awkwardly.

There was a moment of silence before Balin smiled and shook his head.

"Of course, you're human. We should have known…"

Apparently me being human seemed to explain everything, because all the dwarves chorused an 'oh right' before nodding to each others. I didn't get it and Ori probably realized it because he then smiled and quickly elaborated.

"We live very long lives. It isn't uncommon for those of Durin's line to live past their 250's birthdays."

My eyes did widen quite a bit when I heard that. Of course I knew Dori was over 160 but to think he could live for over a hundred years still. It made my head spin a little. I probably would die in around fifty years, and that was if I was lucky. Middle Age hadn't been known for its long life spans. Though I was lucky enough to have received several vaccines, and I was rather healthy and clean compared to my world's Middle Age era people. I couldn't even dream of living up to my hundredth birthday. While I was thinking about this, Ori continued his explanation.

"We usually offer presents and do huge parties every year for young dwarves. Then, after we turn thirty, it is only every five years until we come of age at seventy. Seventieth birthday parties are often quite…exuberant. After that, we only offer presents every decade. Though we still party every five years and do celebrate more privately each year. It is only close family members who offer presents each year, and they're usually little trinkets."

I nodded. It did make some sense, I guessed. I believed I would become rather bored in the end if I had to celebrate my birthday every year for more than two hundred years. Well, the good point was that it did give me some time to find a suitable present for each of them. I would still have to talk with Ori about it though.

Dori smiled softly at me before starting once more.

"So, as I said, even though we usually don't offer presents for someone twenty-sixth birthday, we decided to offer you a few little things."

"You know you didn't need to, right?" I almost shyly commented.

"Amelia, don't start." Dís warned me and I kept silent.

"It's truly nothing much Amelia." Danà said with a kind smile.

She knew me well. She had realized I was starting to become a bit unnerved with all the attention.

"Alright, alright!" Bofur exclaimed joyously. "Enough talks. Let's give you the presents now!"

I smiled at him as Oin, Gloin and Gimli approached with the first present I would receive that day. I was a bit surprised when I saw it was a staff, but then I realized it was prettily carved with runes and each extremity had been reinforced with metal. Still it was light in my hands and I could easily hold it. I happily thanked the three of them and was impressed to find out Gimli had been the one to grave the runes in the wood. They were meant to protect me, he explained really proudly.

After that I received some new dresses from Danà and Dís, as well as a few thin leather corsets I could wear over my long tunics. The embroideries on the neckline had been made by Dís and Danà themselves. That day I found out that Dís was famous for her embroideries, as was Danà. Apparently, when Dís wasn't in the healing wards, she was working with the seamstresses.

Balin kindly offered me a set of feathers with a prettily engraved inkpot. I wasn't surprised anymore to realize that he had been the one to personally engrave the metallic object. I was beginning to understand the importance of the gesture. I warmly thanked him. I had been discussing with him the possibility to learn how to write with a feather and ink. It was really kind of him to remember that little comment I had made a while ago.

It didn't surprise me when just after that, Bofur, Bombur and Bifur gave me something they had made themselves too. Though Bombur shyly admitted he hadn't participated much, he told me he wasn't the artist in the family. Bofur had warmly disagreed then, loudly claiming his brother was a true artist when it came to food. Everyone agreed easily. Then Bofur and Bifur presented me with a weird object. At first I didn't know what it was.

It was made of wood and could be opened. The wood was graved with the traditional dwarvish pattern but there were large runes prettily painted on each side. When I opened it I could see the inside was completely blank of any decoration. I quirked an eyebrow and looked at Bofur who was cheekily smiling at me.

"Erm, thanks. It's really pretty, but what is it?"

"It's only half the present lass. Ori has the other part." Bofur answered with a wide, toothy grin.

I turned toward the youngest brother and he shyly came forward, Dori behind him. Nori wasn't far either but as always he remained slightly apart from the group.

"Here." Ori simply said, handing me two rolls of parchment. "It's only charcoal, and I can redo it if it's not right. I won't mind at all."

I took the parchments and looked at it curiously. I frowned, wondering what was written on it. Slowly I unrolled the first one.

I gasped loudly as soon as my brain registered what was on it.

I couldn't help but startle and the two rolls fell on the floor.

Before anyone could react I was already kneeling. My hand hovered over the parchment rolls. Slowly, gingerly I picked them up as tears were slowly pooling in my eyes. I sniffed as I unrolled the first one again.

My heart clenched.

Looking straight back at me was the soft face of a woman. She was middle aged. Her hair was falling in loose locks around her round face. Her big eyes were expressing nothing but kindness. Her lips were full and her nose small. There were a few differences, but I could easily recognize my aunt. She was there. With me. Smiling at me.

I was crying and my hands were shaking when I unrolled the second parchment to see my uncle's visage.

It wasn't difficult to understand that Bofur and Bifur had made a frame for the pictures.

The dwarves were looking kindly at me when I finally was able to tear my eyes away from the two pictures. It was uncanny how Ori had managed to do such an amazing work. Now I understood why in the past weeks he had asked me so many questions about my uncle and aunt. Sneaky dwarf. He wasn't Nori's brother for nothing.

I was a bit overwhelmed at the moment but the dwarves were kind enough not to crowd me. They slowly stepped back a bit, discussing in small groups, while Dori, Nori, Ori and Bofur remained close by. None of them spoke. They simply gave me their silent support as they waited for me to calm down a bit. My hands were still shaking when Bofur helped me to put the two pieces of parchment properly in the wooden frame.

As soon as it was done, I clutched it tightly, bringing it close to my chest.

All the presents had been kind, considerate or beautiful.

But this was something else entirely.

I looked up to meet Nori's gaze. The thief was once more in the shadows, but I still could easily see his grey eyes. His gaze was rather intense and filled with emotion. I could only guess that it was a sensitive topic for them too. They had lost their parents as well. They understood.

Actually all of them had lost parents or family members, well, except for Gimli, maybe. They all understood.

Ori's voice brought me back from my thoughts when I was about to step towards Nori. Until that second, I hadn't even realized I was about to walk to him, it hadn't been a conscious decision.

"Come Amee, look at all the food we have." Ori exclaimed joyously, grabbing my hand. "Eating something will make you all better."

My eyes remained locked with Nori's for a second more before I was pulled away gently by his little brother.

"Can we start now?" Bombur asked expectantly in a soft voice.

I laughed good heartedly at that, only laughing louder when Bofur whacked his brother playfully and replied.

"You'd eat the whole mountain if we'd let you."

Bombur's comment actually ended up being the signal the others needed to start eating. It broke me completely out of my little emotional moment and I was soon my usual self. We all noisily took a seat and I was overjoyed at finding myself between Ori and Nori. Facing me were Fili and Kili. We all grabbed food but there was so much choice, and the table was so big, that soon enough pieces of food were being thrown from one end to the other. As I still had no ability whatsoever in food-throwing or food-catching, Ori and Nori were the ones who filled my plate.

The delicious smell I had caught earlier actually came from a mouth-watering honey cake baked by Bombur. The dwarf had even added some apples and dried fruits in it. The dough was perfectly spongy and the fruits were so well cooked that each mouthful almost melted. It was amazing. And thankfully, when he saw how much I enjoyed it, Nori actually took it upon himself to cut a large part and went to hide it in the cellar.

I wanted to kiss both him and Bombur for this. But well, considering that it might mean I would get married to both of them, I refrained myself and stayed put.

"This is amazing." I almost moaned while eating the devilishly tasty cake. "Bombur, you have to give me your recipe."

"No can do lass." Bofur answered for his brother.

"What? Why?" I was honestly surprised as I looked at Bofur who was smiling softly.

"It's a family recipe Amelia. We only share those between family members." Bofur immediately explained with a small cheeky smirk.

I blinked and looked at him. Bombur didn't even react as he ate what looked like cheese and ham. Then I looked questioningly at Ori who hesitated for a second, before he nodded. They weren't lying. I pursed my lips, thinking. Sweet food had always been an incredible incentive for me. I enjoyed food as much as anyone around here, but I could kill for a cake like this one. As soon as I thought this I halted myself, realizing that here these words would actually mean something. I shook my head. Alright, I wouldn't kill for it, but I would try to bargain for sure.

"How about an exchange?" I asked, hoping the brothers and their cousin would be amenable to such a solution.

"Nope."

Around us the discussion slowly stopped as everyone started to listen to Bofur and me. I didn't pay attention to this at first. I was too focused on the cheeky dwarf who apparently enjoyed the situation greatly.

"Don't be absurd Bofur. An exchange will benefit the both of us." I insisted.

"I don't see how." He retorted calmly while taking his tankard to drink.

"Well, obviously I'll exchange one of my recipes against this one, so…" I started but the dwarf interrupted me.

"Amelia, I hate most of your recipes." He bluntly said.

All the others silently looked at the both of us, apparently enjoying the banter as if we were here to entertain them. It didn't stop them from commenting though.

"Are her recipes so terrible?" Fili asked Ori.

"She cooks meat and fruits together." Ori answered with a shiver.

I glared at them both and it seemed to be effective. Ori shrank on his seat while Fili quickly looked elsewhere and schooled his features to remove the grimace he had pulled.

"Alright. You might not want to exchange those recipes but I'm sure I can find something else you'd want." I turned back to Bofur.

He snorted and took a large swig of ale before answering.

"What do you want to exchange? Your skills?"

A memory of my bargain in Gorm flashed through my mind. I immediately glared at Bofur.

"That's rude and offensive." I said coolly. "You know I would never do that to any of you."

He had the decency to look a bit sheepish and muttered an apology while most of the dwarves around, Dori and Nori especially, glared at him. He cleared his throat lightly and looked at me as he regained his composure.

"Alright, but I honestly don't see what you could possibly exchange for this recipe. It's an old family one. It's worth a lot. Besides you love it, it's obvious."

"Well, that's one more reason to nicely exchange it with me." I replied instantly.

"Why's that?" His answer actually shocked me.

"Because I'm your friend and you like me?" I quirked an eyebrow before I smiled in what I hoped to be a kind expression.

"That not enough lass."

I frowned and glanced at the other dwarves. They were clearly interested in this discussion, some were amused, some seriously paying attention. I looked at Dori who was among the serious ones. It seemed as if he wanted to tell me something but hesitated to do so. I then turned my head to look at my right, at Nori.

He was playing with his knife, turning it between his fingers absentmindedly. When our eyes met, I saw the usual mischief as well as some clear amusement. A small smirk pulled one corner of his lips upwards and he looked at me as if he knew something I didn't. Or rather, as if he knew what I should do but wouldn't tell me what. I mock glared at him for a second and the fact that his smirk grew a bit was enough to let me know that there was indeed something I could do to obtain this recipe.

I bit my lip while the dwarves waited. The fact that Bofur was waiting patiently, smiling at me, told me that he wasn't actually against Bombur divulging the recipe.

It dawned on me at that instant.

It was a game.

Nothing but a game for him, and I just had to find out what the rules were.

Bofur was a dwarf. He was a typical, blunt, honest, proud and honourable dwarf artisan and warrior.

My gaze flicked towards Dori who was sitting at one corner, at the end of the table next to Ori on his right and Fili on his left and he looked hesitant. He clearly wanted to both help me and let me do it on my own. As I was about to frustratingly sigh I noticed something. Fili was smirking too. He was smirking knowingly just like Nori, just as was Kili. But instead of mockingly looking at me, they seemed to be more amused at Bofur.

I observed the two young brothers before turning towards Nori.

The three of them were amused at Bofur. It wasn't me who didn't know something, it was him. My brain kicked in, my mind skimming through my memories for a time when I was in a similar situation and that included Fili, Kili and Nori.

Suddenly I had to fight down the huge smile that wanted to break on my face.

I exchanged a glance with Nori. He immediately saw that I had found something out because his smirk grew incredibly mischievous.

"Are you sure you don't want an exchange of recipes Bofur?" I asked calmly.

"Told you lass, no can do."

"That's such a shame." I said sighing deeply.

I rested my elbow on the table and my chin in my hand, looking down at my plate. I then took my fork and lazily poked at my food.

"Such a shame." I kept on, sounding sad and disappointed. "And here I thought we were friends."

"Friendship has nothing to do with it lass." Bofur said with a teasing smile, obviously certain that I wouldn't manage to get this recipe out of him.

Ha! He didn't know me as well as he thought. I would do almost anything for a sweet and tasty cake, especially in a chocolate-free world.

I told him so while I looked up at him and met his gaze.

"I would do almost anything for this recipe Bofur. I think I could even … Kill … for it." I emphasized the word kill, taking my sweet time to enunciate clearly.

I saw the smile disappear from his lips while I heard three distinct snorts as well as a few surprised chuckles.

"Oh lass… you don't play fair." Bofur finally said as I looked at him, amused.

He was smiling more widely now so I knew he wasn't annoyed, if anything he was happy.

"We should have told you Bofur." Kili said with a toothy grin. "Amelia is a mean negotiator."

"How did you think she managed to get Kili and me to train her?" Fili asked with a snort.

I sat straight and crossed my arms over my chest. I glanced towards Dori, he was amused and nodded approvingly at me. He looked proud and that made me incredibly happy. The others were commenting the discussion. Danà being forced to explain to Oin loudly what had occurred. Apparently some cheeky dwarf had inserted a nut in the poor healer's ear trumpet and he couldn't get it out. Gloin was now laughing loudly while Bombur was smiling and teasing his brother.

"How did she convince you?" Dís asked her sons.

"She reminded me the exact same thing she reminded Bofur. Admit it Bofur, we're indebted."

Bofur actually laughed before answering.

"That really was a neat trick, Meli. Good thinking on your part. You're really starting to think like a dwarf." He joyously told me.

I felt a small blush creep on my cheeks but smiled at what I took as a compliment.

"Does it mean I'll get this recipe?" I asked.

"Of course you will. I actually thought to teach you how to make it." Bombur replied before Bofur.

"Then all this discussion…"I looked uncertainly at Bofur who was looking rather sheepish.

"Well…it was all in good fun lass."

"Bofur…" I growled as all the other laughed loudly. "You do realize though, that because I'm dealing with your brother and not you, you still owe me one." I glared playfully at him.

In all honesty I didn't care much about all these 'owing' thing they had going on here. I found their logic completely twisted. When they saved my life, they found it normal, natural, they didn't expect me to owe them anything. But when I was the one helping out, it felt as if it was something exceptional and that I deserved something in return. Preposterous.

"You're harsh when you bargain." He almost whined.

"I'm not bargaining anymore. I'm telling you." I said with a smile.

"Fair enough." He laughed loudly.

"But you shouldn't use such an argument for a cake Amelia." Balin kindly chastised me.

"What do you mean?" I asked him with surprise.

"A life-debt isn't something you use to bargain for cakes." He said, sounding like one of my old lecturer back at uni.

"Ahh…but Balin, that depends on how much importance you give to said cake." I winked at him with a cheeky smile.

Laughs boomed loudly around the table and I smiled happily.

After this small discussion and once I had the verbal promise from both Bombur and Bofur that I would receive the recipe, I once more happily ate while listening to the dwarves. At some point though, this amazing breakfast turned lunch had to be over. Bombur finished some of the leftovers in the plates while Dori, Ori and I brought the food left and untouched in the cellar. At around the same point, Bofur started to play his flute and Bifur his clarinet. To my surprise, Balin took out a viol and played along a merry tune while Danà and Dís whistled and clapped their hands, marking the rhythm.

Fili, Kili and Gimli impressed me once more with their agility and reflexes as they threw the empty plates and dishes, as well as the cutlery, in the air, joggling with it before throwing it at Nori who was by the large basin in the kitchen.

In a rather short time, the table was cleaned and everything tidied up and we were all singing and laughing.

"My Lady." Kili bowed deeply, offering me a cheeky smile. "Would you care for a dance?"

His tone was playful and I knew perfectly that he was teasing me so I responded in kind.

"I would be most honoured my Lord."

As soon as the words had passed the barrier of my lips, Kili's hands snaked around my waist and he led me in a weird and slightly mad dance around the table. The others laughed at our antics; Kili would make me spin or would held me up by my waist, all the while whirling and laughing at the music.

When he finally freed me from this madness, my cheeks were probably red as tomatoes, my hair completely dishevelled and my breath short. I couldn't stop laughing and even had to lean against the wall to stay standing. Fili was now dancing with his mother, and it was much more aesthetic than my dance with Kili had been, and Danà was trying to get Gloin to accept a dance too.

I looked around and saw Nori, seating by himself in a shadowy corner. Without thinking I walked in his direction. He seemed deep in thought, his brow furrowed in an angry frown. It made my step falter a bit but I still went to sit in the chair beside his.

"Hey there." I said cheerily.

When he didn't answer but seemed to tense instead, I understood clearly that something was wrong. I had no idea what though.

"Are you alright?" I asked softly.

He didn't look at me but simply nodded. I frowned. Nori didn't usually lie to me, or at least it never had been so obvious.

"Nori?" I put my hand on his and felt him stiffen. "Hey, what's going on?"

"Nothing."

"Do you actually think I'll believe that?" I chuckled.

I startled when he glanced at me. He was angry. Not furious, but angry. Or was it hurt? I didn't have the time to see properly before he looked away. I had no idea what I had done. I wasn't even sure I was the one, who did something. Trying to appease his mind I offered him a smile.

"Will you not dance with me today?" I asked.

"I'm too old for this."

After he uttered this cold answer he swiftly stood and disappeared in the kitchen's shadows.

I blinked at his back. His answer had hurt me, deeply hurt me. I didn't understand why but his coldness towards me and his harsh dismissal had sent a pang of pain through my heart. My chest painfully clenched when he didn't even glance in my direction.

What was going on?

Why didn't he talk to me? Why did he refuse to speak his mind? Didn't he trust me? What was this about?

Suddenly my mood dropped, and even though I had been really happy until then, I now only felt sad and hurt. I didn't understand him and maybe that was what hurt me the most. Nori had always been difficult to read but recently I had thought we were close enough to understand each other, to confide in each other. He had told me details even Dori probably didn't know. Why did he leave me like that? What was this stupid comment about his age?

Danà popped out of nowhere. I hadn't seen her coming and she suddenly appeared at my side, Dís not too far behind. They both sat and turned their seats so that we didn't have to turn our heads to see each other. I didn't know what they wanted to talk about but at this moment I truly didn't feel like talking much. Nori's abrupt departure had efficiently depressed me.

"Why do you sit here all alone?" Danà asked with a soft, motherly smile.

I blinked and tried to find a reasonable answer, when I couldn't I shrugged and forced a smile on my lips.

"I'm not really alone anymore now, so what does it matter?"

The two older women exchanged a glance before Dís spoke.

"Amelia, is everything alright? Did you and Nori have an argument?"

My heart clenched but I managed to keep my smile unwavering.

"Why would we argue?" I knew perfectly well that I wasn't answering her question, and by the look she sent me, she was all too aware of it too.

"Amelia, one minute you're happy as can be and the next you seem…rather down." Danà softly replied.

"And between those two moments, you talked with Nori and he left." Dís added.

Dear lord, did women from every race and every world love to gossip? I hesitated being annoyed at the two women, because I hated gossip, or glad that they would actually care. I had no doubt though that they weren't trying to find some juicy story about someone else's argument. They were only concerned because they had seen my mood change rather quickly. I really needed to learn how to hide my feelings properly.

I sighed deeply and shrugged once more.

"There's been no arguments. He just stood and left."

Dís and Danà exchanged another glance and this time it did annoy me. I felt cornered and I didn't like it. I was about to do like Nori did, stand quickly and leave, when Dís stopped me.

"You shouldn't worry about it. Nori has always had quite a temper. He hides it better than most dwarves, that's all."

I observed Dís but she was looking at her sons who were happily dancing together, making wild gesture. I looked at them and smiled. Those two were really a strange duo. I rested my chin on my hand and observed them, chuckling at their antics. They really knew how to make people laugh, but to be honest it seemed a dwarvish trait.

I really couldn't see myself living anywhere but with dwarves now. They were a rowdy bunch, but I loved their cheerfulness. As I smiled fondly while looking at the two brothers and the merry band behind them, I didn't realize that Nori had come back. I didn't see him look at me with a flash of hurt in his eyes before anger replaced it as he glared in the direction of the others.

And neither he nor I realized that Dís and Danà witnessed it all.

* * *

><p>Weeks passed once more with nothing really happening except for Nori's suddenly rather cold demeanour. Well, he actually wasn't cold. He was just plain weird. Sometimes he would act like he usually did, smirking, smiling, winking and teasing while always being kind. And sometimes he would turn into this cold, seemingly emotionless stranger that I soon come to detest.<p>

It wasn't Nori.

Nori wasn't like this.

And even Dori and Ori noticed something was wrong with him.

The only thing I could say about this strange behaviour is that it tended to happen when we were gathered with some of our friends. Nori was himself when it was just the four of us. But sometime he would become grumpy when we were together with other dwarves. I had no idea what was going on in his head.

But when any of us would try and talk about it, Nori would just frown before leaving the room, not even bothering to answer our worried questions. And one day he just left.

Dori hadn't said a word about it. The moment he realized his brother's departure, he just frowned and turned away from Nori's empty room, not uttering a single word. Ori and I had exchanged a worried and sad glance before hugging each other, trying to find some comfort in the other's presence.

That same day, Dori came to observe me while I trained in the afternoon. He intently watched me spar against Dwalin and then Bifur before he stood and came to the centre of the room.

"Dwalin" He called over. "Do you reckon she's ready to follow us?" He asked, making me squeak in surprise.

"You want her to join with us on the way to Archet?" Dwalin enquired, raising an eyebrow.

"Well, it seems to me she did rather well today." Dori replied.

Both Dori and Dwalin were interrupted by Bifur who spoke in Khuzdul and gestured widely.

"I agree with him." Dwalin gruffly added after Bifur stopped.

"Alright then" Dori nodded and turned away.

I blinked at the three dwarves as they all left in different directions. Apparently my training was over for the day but none of them actually bothered telling me so. I pondered on my next action for all but a second before quickly jogging in Dori's direction. I was soon walking alongside him in a corridor I couldn't remember ever using.

"Dori, what's going on? Can I go with you?" I asked anxiously.

I really wished he would say yes. Nori's departure had been an awful blow to my mood that morning and I wished for nothing more than a small distraction. Leaving Thorin's Halls with Dori would allow me, not to forget about it, but to focus on something else. I couldn't lie to myself; I seemed unable not to think about Nori, not to worry about him, for him. But if there was one thing I was good at, it was focusing so hard on something that other thoughts would just seem to fade in my mind.

"Aye Amelia. You can follow me when I leave in two days time. That is, if you still wish to." Dori replied with a smile.

"Are you joking? Of course I would love to!" I exclaimed joyously. "What did Bifur say by the way?"

I saw him frown a bit before he understood what I was talking about.

"I always forget you don't speak Khuzdul." He muttered. "Bifur thinks you did good progress. He thinks you should be able to defend yourself sufficiently well against the average bandit."

"The average bandit?"

"It is a compliment coming from him. Had he said you could only defend against scum…then I wouldn't have agreed to take you with us."

I arched an eyebrow but chose not to question this further. Dwarf logic and idioms were just too complicated, even after a year. Actually it would probably require a lifetime to understand them perfectly, and even then, I wasn't sure.

"Who is coming and where are we going then?" I asked him.

"We'll be going to Archet. It's a large town east from here."

"Large town?" The doubt was clearly evident in my tone and Dori smirked.

"Aye, it is rather large. It is close to a rather large road and the trade there is good, especially weaponry." He explained and I nodded, showing my understanding.

"And who's coming with us?"

"Dwalin should be assigned as one of the mercenaries. I'm actually going to see Balin now, first to tell him you'll be joining us, and to ask who is going to be assigned to this mission."

"Is there another merchant?" I asked while we kept on walking.

"No. It's not needed. I'm only going with few items to sell. I mostly want to check some contracts with the human merchant there and see if there are some more orders."

"So it'll be just you, Dwalin and me?"

"No, there should be someone else at least. We'll have to carry the weapons there, there's no need for a cart or wagon."

I nodded again and looked around. We were currently crossing one of the high walkways that crossed the Halls. I wasn't brave enough to go near the edge, I wasn't afraid of heights per se, but this didn't mean I was happy walking far above ground with nothing to protect me from a deadly fall.

The view was quite impressive though, but I had no time to really look around as we were already at the other side, Dori quickly walking to a large wooden door with large metallic hinges. I followed him in found out that this place was what only could be described as an office of some sort.

Every wall was covered with shelves bending under the weight of numerous books and dusty tomes. Light came in from three large tunnel-like windows that were carved in the mountain side, allowing the sun, but not the rain or snow, in. The middle of the room was occupied by a large wooden desk, which was disappearing under huge piles of parchments that seemed to stay in place only thanks to some magical power.

And behind all that…Balin was sitting on a small chair, head bent to read something.

"Balin" Dori said as greetings. "Who's free to accompany me to Archet? Dwalin told me already he would and we agreed to let Amelia go too."

Well, that was quick and to the point.

Balin looked up and frowned slightly before smiling kindly at me.

"So I take it your training is going well?" He asked me.

"I managed to fight of Bifur…for five minutes." I answered, wondering whether I should be ashamed of such a pitiful achievement.

"Well, that's rather good." Balin smiled some more, apparently believing it was indeed an achievement.

"We told her so." Dori agreed proudly.

I couldn't help but smile. It was odd but each time one of my guardian was proud of something I did, it made me giddy. And here the two of them thought I did well. I felt like bouncing happily on my feet, though I restrained from doing so.

"So, who can follow us?" Dori asked once more.

"Let me check." Balin muttered while putting away the parchment he was reading and taking a long roll from the closest shelf, right behind him.

He unrolled it and started to mutter while reading. After several minutes he looked up with a frown.

"I'm afraid there's no one."

That surprised even me.

"What? Where's Gavin?" Dori asked loudly.

"Going south, to Dunlands along with Mavin, Fundor, and Thàr." Balin replied grumpily.

"You sent all of them to Dunlands? They'll be away for months!"

"Well, it's not as if we had much choice. We don't have that many mercenaries and with all the troubles we've had recently, Thorin has ordered to increase the number of guards." Balin exclaimed, clearly annoyed by Dori's tone.

"Increase the guard? Surely he doesn't expect an attack?" Dori's voice had changed, growing more concerned than exasperated.

"I'm not too sure what he expects or not, but two of our caravans have been attacked already, and the description of the attackers..." Balin answered cautiously glancing at me.

"What about them?" Dori insisted.

"Well, a few dwarves said the leader had a scar on the face that cut his cheek to his lips." Balin softly explained, looking at me.

Oh, I didn't like that. I hadn't paid much attention to what had happened in Gorm after I left. From what I had understood, the dwarves that had been sent hadn't met with the mercenaries. Actually they had been met by a scared crowd of peasants that were glad to see some dwarves. That last part had almost been fun.

Still, the idea that those mercenaries were still running around and were targeting dwarves was unsettling to say the least. But at the moment, I was more preoccupied by Nori than by a few men, even though they scared me.

Dori sighed and both dwarves seemed deep in thought when I startled them, clearing my throat lightly.

"Why don't you ask Fili and Kili, or Bifur and Bofur for that matter? They're all here and already went to other towns." I asked them.

The two dwarves exchanged a glance before Dori answered me.

"Well, Bifur and Bofur have to stay here right now. With all the caravans arriving and leaving, they have to make sure they have enough items produced."

"But maybe Fili could follow you." Balin interrupted him. "The lad's been begging me to let him and his brother go on a mission."

"I guess he could come. He's a good warrior and is serious too." Dori thought aloud.

"What about Kili?" I couldn't help but ask.

"No. Only one of them should go, especially after last time." Balin shook his head. "Besides, Fili will benefit from this, he could learn a bit more about our usual trades." He added this part to Dori.

"Well then, it'll be the four of us." Dori nodded.

Both of them discussed some more details about the coming trade but I didn't pay that much attention. I was deep in thought, wondering what Nori would say if he knew I was about to leave. He had left without a word, without so much as a goodbye, and I couldn't help but be deeply hurt by this.

I knew I probably could have spoken with Dís and Danà about it, the two women seemed to know something I didn't, but it didn't seem right. I had the feeling I should try and deal with this myself, though I had no idea why or even what I was supposed to deal with.

I was brought back to the present time by Dori's hand on my shoulder.

"Let's go home Amelia. We have plenty to prepare, we're leaving the day after tomorrow."

I nodded and followed him once more.

He was right too, we did have a lot to do…and telling Ori that the both of us were leaving was far from the easiest one.

* * *

><p>Two days later I was standing at the massive doors of Thorin's Halls entrance and my heart was clenching painfully. How could it have been different when Ori was looking at me with such a sad face? I hugged him for the third time that morning and he returned the hug strongly.<p>

"Be careful Amee." He whispered in my ear.

"I swear I will. Don't worry. Dori is with me, isn't he? That must count for something." I replied softly.

"Take care of him too, alright?" His voice was so low that I had trouble to hear him, even though he spoke directly in my ear.

"I swear I will."

I squeezed his shoulder a bit before taking a step back. We looked at each other for a second, clearly both hesitating, before we both hugged each other once more.

"I'll miss you." He told me, not trying to speak particularly low this time.

"We'll be back soon." I said while fighting back the tears that menaced to gather in my eyes.

"Amelia." Dori's voice broke our little hug. "We should go now." He said kindly, coming closer to pat my shoulder.

This time, to avoid temptation, I took three steps back. Meanwhile Dori was looking at Ori and said in a voice that conveyed both sternness and kindness.

"You be careful. Stay in the Halls and remember to eat proper meals."

"Dori, I'm not a child anymore." Ori whined while rubbing his forehead with one hand.

"And don't drink the new barrel of ale I brought back yesterday. I'll know it." Dori added, unbothered by his brother's plea.

"And remember to eat vegetables!" I couldn't help but tease him.

Ori glared at me, but his sweet smile told me I wouldn't face any kind of retribution for this little comment.

"Well, we should go now." Dori sadly said.

"Take care." I told Ori, waving at him to avoid spending ten more minutes hugging him.

"You too, both of you." He replied.

And then we left. Just like that. Because at some point we had to and there truly was nothing else to say. I walked down the path, Fili and Dwalin walking a few steps ahead and Dori next to me. I had my long staff with me, the one Gloin, Oin and Gimli had offered. I was feeling oddly proud of it. It wasn't attached on my back pack though, as it would be useless if I couldn't access it easily. For the time being I simply walked with it in hand, as if it was a simple walking staff, even if a rather long one. After awhile spent walking in silence I glanced at the oldest brother and asked him.

"Is it always so hard? Walking away I mean."

Dori took some time to answer, he cocked his head and seemed to look at the sky for a few minutes maybe before he sighed and glanced at me.

"Yes. Yes it is. But it is necessary. Ori understands. He understands why I have to go, and why you do too."

I lowered my head a bit.

"I'm not… I don't want to appear ungrateful Dori. I'm really, really glad I had the chance to meet you. But I couldn't spend a life behind walls, at least not until I saw a bit more of my new world." I explained softly.

"Even after what you already saw of it?" He enquired gingerly.

I took a few minutes to think about my answer. I wanted to be honest, both with myself and with Dori. I wouldn't lie to him.

"It's hard. Life here is so much harder than it seemed in the country I used to live in. But in a way it is less…complicated. I want to see what this world looks like. Don't worry though, I'm not going to turn into a reckless, adventurous person." I added with a smile.

After those few words we started to talk more specifically about our destination. Just like we had done during the two previous expeditions I had taken part in, we walked until the sun was lowering at the horizon. At that moment, the dwarves left the road and went further away toward the trees. When they decided to stop I was surprised to realize that I wasn't that tired. Actually, except for some general tiredness at having walked all day long, I was perfectly fine and could have kept on walking all night long. That was quite a change compared to the previous time.

When I told them about it, the dwarves smiled. Well Dori smiled, Dwalin grunted and Fili actually snorted.

"It's perfectly normal Amelia. You're getting used to running and training all day now." Dori commented while picking up some dried woods.

"Maybe we should give you some weapons to carry…the weight might tire you more." Fili teased as he walked to the small stream we had stopped by.

"I'm not the one who decided I shouldn't carry anything." I retorted.

"Because you don't need to, three dwarves are more than enough to carry the few weapons we have with us." Dori replied, sending a glare towards Fili.

"Few?" The young dwarf repeated, not caring for the glare and smiling cheekily instead. "My back is killing me, I swear the weight on my shoulders made me lose inches." He joked.

"I don't see any difference." I deadpanned.

"Oy."

We were both smiling at each other and it felt nice just being able to joke lightly like this. Fili filled a water skin with clear water before he came towards me. I had taken a pan out of Dori's pack, wondering how he could carry so much stuff and not suffer from any back pain. Fili poured the water and then silently checked that all our water skins were completely filled. Meanwhile Dori had gathered enough wood and was about to light a fire.

"Could you teach me how to do that?" I suddenly asked, remembering all those times when I needed fire or light but couldn't find any.

Dori looked at me with a small frown. His hands had stopped their movements.

"Teach you how to do what exactly?"

"Light a fire."

Fili and Dori looked at me with wide eyes before Dori muttered what sounded like a curse. Well, at least the way he pronounced it was similar to how someone would pronounce one.

"You don't know how to light a fire?" Fili seemed surprised.

"I never needed to learn before I came here, and at first, there were a few other important things to learn." I explained with a shrug.

"I always forget to show you. I've known all along but…Well, now we have time and there's nothing else to do." Dori said with a smile. "Come here, let me show you."

It wasn't easy to light a fire without a modern lighter. Not easy at all. The principle was rather basic; you had to make a sparkle close enough to small, dried twigs and leaves and hope it would catch. While I kept on trying to make the sparkle and find a way to make said sparkle fall in the direction I wanted it to, Dori and Fili discussed various technicalities I didn't care much about.

I did learn though that Gloin and Oin were apparently very good at making fire quickly. But that didn't really help me.

At some point Dori had no other choice but to start the fire; if we wanted to eat something tonight we needed it. Around the same time, Dwalin came back with a rabbit I had to skin and prepare. The rest of the evening though, I spent sitting with a small pile of twigs and dried leaves in front of me, attempting to light a fire.

I didn't manage to do it, not even once.

This time around, I was asked to take my turn and keep watch again. I didn't mind. I knew it was a proof of their trust in me. Once more I was given the last watch because I still couldn't say how much time had passed clearly. During my turn, I sat with my back against a trunk, my staff next to me. I had Ori's notebook with me; I didn't have that many blank pages left now but still enough for this little journey at least.

In the morning, when the sky slowly became lighter, I took it upon myself to rekindle the fire and to put some water to boil to prepare some tea. We didn't have a precise schedule to follow, Dori had told me, and so we could take our time. Or at least we could afford to have a warm breakfast in the morning with tea. I had just put some mint in it, not for medicinal purpose but just for the taste, when the sun started to rise at the horizon.

I walked to gently kick Fili's feet, which made him grumble and complain when he saw me kindly shake Dori's shoulder. Dwalin was already awake because of the little noise we had made.

"Why do you kick me when you're so nice to Dori?" Fili yawned.

"Because I like him more…" I teased.

The dwarves gathered quickly around the fire and my mint tea had quite some success. In the end though, we didn't spend much time and breakfast was quickly eaten. We soon were back on the road.

It took us one week and a half to arrive in Archet. It was a big town, bigger than any I had seen before. And apparently in this world it meant dirtier and creepier. The roads in town weren't paved and were muddier than the one we had walked on in the mountains. There were garbage on the sides or next to the houses and I wondered how these people could stay healthy in such an environment. When one of them loudly coughed loudly next to me and ended up spitting at my feet…I realized they just weren't healthy and were simply revoltingly disgusting.

I couldn't help but feel slightly afraid when we walked in and the three dwarves probably felt it because they walked closer to me. This place had shops of all sorts but we quickly went directly to the blacksmiths. It didn't take long for Dori to deliver our weapons and take note of the added orders and a few hours later we were standing in front of a dingy and dirty house that was larger than the others and that called itself an inn. Well, had it been my world we would have called it…a barn? Seriously the place was awful.

We ended up sharing a large room, Dori apologizing to me because there was no other room he could rent for me only. I truly didn't mind, we all had separate beds and I knew I wouldn't have liked being left alone. But when we ate in the common room and I saw the way the men around looked at me, I realized what it looked like for people here. This was actually the only noticeable thing that happened during our very short stay in Archet.

The following day we were back on the road, going home.

During the whole trip back, every evening I would try and fail to light a fire, and every morning I would wake the dwarves and prepare them mint tea.

All in all, this trip was uneventful compared to the two others I had made.

It shouldn't have surprised me then, when we arrived in Thorin's Halls roughly three weeks after we left, that Thorin asked to see Dori immediately.

As we were together and there had been no mention I couldn't come, I followed the dwarf to the main Hall where Thorin was already talking to Balin. After some very short greetings, the King spoke sternly.

"I received words that Nori is in jail."

At hearing those words my heart clenched painfully and I gasped, bringing my hand to my open mouth. My eyes widened and I suddenly felt scared. What happened? What was going to happen to him? When did the King learn about this?

Apparently though, I was the only one surprised by that information. I saw Dori's shoulder slump and a look of resigned sadness on his face.

"What happened this time?" He asked in a defeated tone.

"I don't know and don't care." Thorin snapped and Dori flinched, as did I. "I received words of this approximately a week ago. I don't have time for this. You go and bail him out, if you want to that is."

Those words clearly angered Dori and he didn't bother hiding it.

"You know very well I would never let my little brother rot in jail." He replied coldly. "Where is he exactly?"

"Lunetown"

At that Thorin turned away and simply walked out of the room, living us with Balin and Ori who strode in at that moment.

The happy mood I had been in when passing the massive doors was all but a memory.

How could I be happy?

Nori was in jail.

* * *

><p><strong>AN: Hi everyone! Thanks a lot for reading :) And just like last time, I want to thank you for the reviews! I'm really overwhelmed ^^**

**Thanks a lot to all the guests who review too. It's really nice to take the time and I'm really happy that you like this story. It means a lot!**

**Alright. First I'm sorry for the wait. As some of you already know, I'm having a bit trouble with the writing recently so that explains why I reduced the number of updates per week. **

**I hope you liked this chapter :) I know some of you really were waiting for the birthday and I hope you aren't disappointed. About the dwarves, this is clearly not cannon. I only guessed that, if you live up to 250, at some point another year doesn't mean as much. **

**Anyway :) I wonder whether you guessed what was going to happen with Nori ^^ I'm curious as to whether or not you thought that Amelia would be the one in trouble. I can't always have that, right? And well, Nori is a thief so...it was to be expected.**

**Well, as for the next update. I really want to try and keep on writing right now. I haven't written anything in a bit more than a week, and it's annoying me :P So I think I'll update either Sunday or Monday (probably Monday... But well...you never know^^)**

**Thanks a lot (again and again and again) for the support and the interest you show for this little (monstrous) story ;)**


	31. A Family's Pain

**Everything still belongs to JRR Tolkien, except for my OC and the plot**

* * *

><p>There was a short moment where everyone remained silent. I was completely shocked by the fact that Nori had been imprisoned. Of course I knew it was a possibility, he was a thief after all and all things considered, it was probably better for him to end in jail. Who knew what people in this era did to thieves? At least he was safe…well probably.<p>

Dori sighed and brought one of his hands in front of his eyes, I saw clearly that he was struggling to compose himself. If I was hurt by the information, so would Dori and Ori. At that thought I turned towards the younger brother and was met with his desperate face. His eyes were wide open and he was obviously hurt and at a loss, just like me. I let my bag fall on the floor and my staff clattered loudly against the stone as I precipitated to hug Ori.

We both needed it.

We remained like this until Balin softly spoke.

"I'm sorry Dori. I tried to appease Thorin but he had warned Nori more than once already."

"I know Balin, I know." Dori looked completely defeated. "I just wish I knew why he started doing this. Why doesn't he stop?"

"There's just so much you can do Dori." Balin tried to soothe his old friend.

I still had one arm around Ori's waist as he held me around my shoulders. It was easy to feel him shiver against me. I looked at him and saw the tears gathered in his eyes. I bit my lip as I felt tears start to pool in my eyes. I quickly blinked.

"What do we do now?" I asked after clearing my throat.

"Well, I'm going to Lunetown." Dori sighed. "Do you know how much we have to pay this time?"

"Twenty gold coins and twenty silvers." Balin breathed out.

Ori gasped loudly and I looked at him. I had no notion of how much that was. I truly had no idea. Still their reactions were quite an indication that this amount might be a problem.

"How long will he stay in jail if we don't pay?" Dori asked, shocking me.

"I'm not too sure Dori. It's the third time he's been caught or brought in Lunetown during the past decade." Balin shrugged.

"Surely you don't plan on leaving him there?" I intervened as fear made my heart beat faster. "Is it that much?" I asked them.

"Of course not Amelia." Dori gently scoffed. "We won't let him rot in there."

I felt Ori gently squeeze my waist and I looked at him as Dori looked more forlorn than ever.

"It is a lot Amelia. Well, for us that is. We weren't even close to earn half that much with the trip you just made." Ori softly explained.

Defeated wasn't even close to describe how Dori looked. It pained me to see him like this. He looked old suddenly, tired, hurt and it felt as if he was lost. And he probably was all that.

"You'll have to leave quickly Dori. I'm afraid they won't be patient with him." Balin warned shaking his head sadly.

After those words, Balin took a step forward and patted Dori's shoulder lightly, encouragingly, before turning away and leaving in the same direction the King had earlier. We were left alone and when Dori started to move, I quickly grabbed both my bag and my staff and jogged behind him, Ori in toe.

"I hope you know I'm coming with you." I told Dori as we strode towards our home.

"Amelia, I really don't think this is a good idea." He replied. "Lunetown isn't that far, and the journey there isn't that dangerous, but I don't see any reason why you should get acquainted with its prison."

"I see one. A good one too." I retorted. "Nori is there." I stated calmly. "I'm going with you."

"I'm going too." Ori then piped in.

We were in front of our door now and Dori sighed loudly as he pushed it open and strode in. I glanced at Ori. He was probably as determined as I was right now. I wasn't sure whether this was a usual occurrence, but I felt that Dori was used to go alone. I didn't see him going with Ori to bail their brother out of jail. Simply picturing him going alone to bail Nori out made my heart clench some more. At this moment I did resent Nori a bit. Why couldn't he simply tell everything to his brothers?

Ori and I quickly entered our home, finding Dori already busy in the cellar, putting some bread, cheese and dried meat in his bag.

"I am not taking you two. It's not a place for either of you." The older dwarf said sternly.

"I'm going! This time I'm going!" Ori snapped, shocking me with his cold and harsh tone, before he left to go to his room.

Dori's shoulders slumped some more and I looked at him attentively. He had stopped moving, one of his hand hovering slightly over a piece of bread. His face expressed how torn he felt and I quickly came to feel the same way. Softly I asked him, keeping my voice low because I didn't want Ori to hear.

"Why don't you want Ori to follow you?"

The look in his eyes was sad and it highlighted just how distraught Dori was.

"Amelia, if Ori sees his brother like this…" He started to say then shook his head sadly. "I don't want him to despise Nori or feel hurt at the sight of his big brother behind bars."

I held my breath for a second. To tell the truth I wasn't sure I wanted to see that. I knew I wouldn't despise Nori, I could probably never do that, but I feared what we would find.

"Dori, I don't see how Ori could ever hate or dislike his brother." I whispered my answer and I turned my gaze to the door. "As for the hurt…I think it's too late already."

Dori shook his head forlornly and I put my hand on his arm, gently squeezing it.

"Let's just all go together. At least like that, we'll all be here for each other." I softly added.

"You're right. It's still early, we can leave in one hour and we'll manage to walk quite a bit today." He said.

He was about to leave the cellar when he stopped and seemed to hesitate about something. Finally he glanced in my direction and whispered.

"You might want to replenish your stock of medicinal plants before we leave."

My heart dropped. I knew what he had wanted to say with those words. It wasn't complicated to understand the half-hidden meaning behind them. Nori would probably be injured in one way or another. I forced myself to inhale and exhale slowly to calm my nerves. I didn't know what I could expect, but Dori's words were forcing me to anticipate the worst.

As I was alone in the darkness of the cellar, I leant heavily against one of the shelves. What had Nori done? Will he be alright? How long already had he been in jail?

I felt suddenly overwhelmed by negative emotions, sadness, hurt, fear, concern, pain, fear again…so much fear.

I quickly strode to my room and poured clear water in my small basin before taking a cloth and, after plunging it in the cold water I pressed it against my eyes and forehead. The coolness managed to calm the impending panic attack. I exhaled slowly, forcing my breath to come out steadily and trying to calm the pounding heart in my chest. After the several minutes it took for me to calm down, I quickly opened my bag and took my satchel out. I still had everything I thought I might need, but I could do with some more ointments and bandages.

I rapidly strode out of my room and directly went to the healing wards.

I entered the wards without knocking at the door, one it wasn't needed here, and two Oin would probably not hear it anyway. The healer was currently busy healing a young child. There weren't many children in Thorin's Halls so I knew most of them from the time I had spent in the wards. Apparently being a dwarf didn't stop them from injuring themselves, quite the contrary. I offered the little boy a soft smile.

"Hello Bàni. You played with your father's dagger again?"

"No! I didn't!" The child protested loudly enough for Oin to hear him clearly. "It was an accident."

"Sure lad, sure." Oin said while finishing the stitches on the boy's arms. "Did you need something Amelia?"

"I need some clean bandages and probably another jar of witch hazel's ointment." I said simply, I couldn't really take it without Oin's permission, though I was certain he wouldn't mind.

"Rampage? Who went on a rampage?" Oin asked me visibly surprised.

"Not rampage. Bandage. Bandage." I enunciated as clearly as I could while Bàni chuckled.

"Bandage? Why do you need bandages?" He asked, finally taking his ear trumpet out.

"Dori, Ori and I are going to meet Nori in Lunetown." I said, not really wanting to explain all the details in front of a child.

I was quite certain that almost everyone knew what Nori did for a living, but that didn't mean I would participate in giving details about his problems. Oin understood clearly enough what I had meant and the child wouldn't repeat something that didn't sound interesting.

"Alright. Take the bandages and the witch hazel and goatweed ointment. Take the fresh batch, I'll make another one." He seemed to ponder on something before he added. "Take a jar of honey with you too. And I think we have some fresh willow bark powder somewhere."

I didn't even think about the implications of his words as he clearly told me to take more things than what I thought I would need. I quickly grabbed what I needed and offered my mentor a soft and grateful smile.

"Thanks Oin."

"Leave now, Dori won't wait for you." He replied without looking at me.

I barely had enough time to put those supplies in my satchel and grab a clean change instead of the dirty clothes I had in my bag before Dori decided we should leave. As I passed through the kitchen, behind Ori, I managed to pick the apples that were in a bowl on the table and emptied them all in my bag.

We left Thorin's Halls in a hurry and wordlessly. From the way they held their heads low, I could tell the two brothers were ashamed of this situation. I couldn't begrudge them that. I could somehow understand why they would feel that way, even though I didn't agree. But well, I wasn't a proud dwarf, and I truly was too worried to care about what others might think. Though, the fact that Dori and Ori would go to help their brother was a sure sign of their care for him.

It was now the fourth time I was living the Halls but this time around the mood was definitely different. Even if I had wanted to, I couldn't have found it in myself to rejoice about anything.

The general mood was sombre and there was no will in any of us to lift it.

That evening, when we stopped to camp, Dori walked away to gather some wood for the fire. Meanwhile, Ori was silently preparing his bedroll for the night. Quietly I went to join him and, when he saw me, he sighed deeply before sitting heavily on the ground. It was obvious that he was upset, it would have been odd if he hadn't been actually.

I sat near him and couldn't resist the urge to ask him the stupidest question ever.

"Are you alright?"

He glanced at me, as if saying 'I'm just as fine as you' and finally rested his chin on one of his hands before answering.

"I'm…angry…I think." He hesitated slightly.

That did surprise me. I hadn't expected that. I thought he was going to say that he was sad or worried.

"Angry?" I repeated questioningly.

"Nori, he…" Ori stopped, shook his head and started again. "He always acts as if I'm a child and yet he's nothing but a thief. He always told me that I needed to do a proper job, always said how proud he was that I was a clerk working with Balin even though I am young…and look at him. What is he? A thief! And not a good one at that if he gets caught by men."

I could see his anger shine in his eyes. It was unusual and a bit disturbing. I had always known Ori as a soft and kind person. He wasn't one to get easily angry. But when I thought about his words, I could only admit it was probably normal for him to feel that way. Still, I had to reply to him, and I tried to soothe him.

"Ori, he is your older brother. He will always treat you like a child and will always care for you and be proud of you. And why shouldn't he anyway?"

"But he's a thief! Do you know what some dwarves say sometimes when they think I don't hear them? They say that I'm just 'that thief's brother'…They don't even say his name Amelia! Most of the dwarves don't trust him, every time there's a minor problem in the halls, or when an idiot lose one of his belongings, they always come looking at us. They always think it's Nori's fault."

I listened attentively at his rant but each new sentence was another arrow that pierced my heart. The three brothers were supposed to stand united, always. They weren't supposed to be torn apart because of some secrets. Nori's secret suddenly felt too much for me to bear but I couldn't possibly divulge it.

From Ori's words though, I only understood how much Nori cared for his little brother, how much he wanted for Ori to have a good life and yes, how proud he was. Those were positive yet Ori felt apparently offended by Nori's care. But most of all, I could hear how much it hurt Ori that the big brother he had grown looking up to was being so badly perceived by the others. It actually hurt me too.

"Nori being a thief doesn't change the fact that he cares and worries for you. It doesn't change the fact that he is our brother." Dori's voice startled us.

"I don't care that he worries for me. He should worry for himself." Ori spat but it was easy to see that he was now more upset than angry. "And you're one to talk. You always snap at him for being a thief."

"I snap at him because he is my little brother." Dori whispered looking away from us.

"I'm sure there's a reason for him doing all this." I murmured softly, gently nudging Ori's shoulder with mine.

"I don't see what kind of reason could be good enough to force someone to become a thief." Dori commented dryly.

"Well…I don't know. But I really think Nori is a good person." I replied, lowering my head.

"He is a good brother too…" Ori whispered forlornly.

"Aye. It's too bad he's so stupid." Dori added.

I couldn't help it. Dori's dry and flat tone made me chuckle. I had been too nervous, too tense in the past hours, and it was relieving to be able to laugh about nothing in particular. Soon, Ori was chuckling too and when I looked at Dori, I realized he was smiling kindly. I wasn't far from believing he had done this on purpose, first letting me talk a bit alone with Ori then waiting for him to realize that, despite his many faults, Nori was still their caring brother. The light chuckles were short lived but did relieve some of the tension. We were still all rather upset, but at least now we managed to talk together.

Still, I couldn't sleep that night. My stomach was twisted in anxious knots and I had barely managed to eat. Now I was lying on my back, my head resting on both my hands and I gazed at the stars.

I wondered whether Nori had been given food, whether there was a barred window like in old movies or whether he was in a completely dark room. I had no idea what prison was like around here and I could only hope for the best while fearing the worst.

* * *

><p>We walked quickly. The days were long and we were travelling with light bags. Our objective was to arrive as soon as possible in Lunetown to free Nori and be gone. So we woke up early, made very short breaks, and stopped for the night rather late, waiting for the sun to be at the horizon already.<p>

After three days at this pace, we crossed a small river. Ori told me then that we were actually not far from Gorm. I realized then that this was probably the river the villagers had talked about months ago. At that point I was asking Ori questions about everything I could think of. It helped the both of us not to depress at the thought of Nori being imprisoned. It was how I learned that we had crossed the river called Little Lune and that this river would soon join another, unnamed one, to form the river Lhûn that had given its name to Lunetown.

Four more days later, a week after we left Thorin's Halls, we were in sight of what could for once really be called a town. This small city was bigger than Archet had been, approximately twice as much. Gorm was nothing compared to it. The major difference was that there were two roads that were paved in Lunetown and they crossed in the main city place that was paved too.

Some buildings were rather high and it was somehow odd to see three, four even five stories in such a place. The town was bustling with people and I couldn't help but grab Dori's sleeve when we were faced for the first time with the crowd.

Even though this place was bigger, or maybe because it was, it was dirtier than ever. There were piles of garbage, flies and mangy dogs that stayed near those disgusting piles. Some people seemed to wear better clothes but the majority was just dirty. Some people probably hadn't washed since the last time it rained and I could have bet they didn't know what soap was.

But what was worse than what my eyes saw, was the smell that seemed to permeate the whole city. I couldn't even describe it. It was probably a mixture of urine, rotten meat and fish as well as rotten vegetables, dirty bodies and animals. I had trouble breathing and was walking with my hand against my nose. It didn't do much though.

I stuck close to Dori and Ori, frightened at the thought of getting lost in here. I had no illusions that this would be a terrible, terrible thing to do.

We walked to the centre of the town and to the town's master house. His house was surprisingly made of stone, as were several others around the main place and I could only guess that it meant their owners were rich.

Remembering the master of Gorm, I was rather surprised to see that this one was wearing clean clothes and didn't seem that old. He was even friendly at first, but when Dori told him we were looking for a dwarf who had been put in jail, his whole demeanour changed. He turned cold and haughty and gestured us in the direction of the city's other side, telling us to pay the prison's warden directly and not to bother him anymore.

Dori mumbled about how he would have gone there immediately if he wasn't obliged to greet the master first. I glanced toward Ori but he didn't seem to pay any attention to his brother's angry mumbling.

We walked as quickly as we could to one of the very few stone houses further out of town, but contrarily to the others, this one was built near the river shore and only had one ground floor. We did have to walk up a series of steps before Dori could knock at the large wooden door.

My heart was pounding in my chest. We would soon see Nori. We would soon free him.

As the door opened on a fat, dirty man who was wearing a chainmail, I felt my anxiety grew tenfold. I wanted to be done with it already.

"What d'ya want?" The man asked Dori.

I realized at that moment that he was chewing loudly on something but didn't seem to swallow whatever it was that he was eating.

"We're here to pay the bail for a dwarf that was brought here some weeks ago."

The man snorted before making a disgusting gurgling noise. He came in and gestured us to follow. It was only when I passed the threshold and saw him actually spit in what looked like an old, western movie-like spittoon that I realized he was chewing tobacco. I pulled a face, this wasn't really what I would call a charming habit.

My eyes quickly looked around. The room was bare, save for a chair, a table and a trunk that was closed with a huge padlock.

"You've come for the thief! Ah. Worthless scum that one is! Tried to break in the master's house." The man seemed angry as he ranted and insulted Nori.

I felt anger rise in my chest but I managed to hide it. I couldn't say so for Ori and Dori who looked murderous as the man kept on insulting Nori.

"Where is he?" Dori finally interrupted him.

The man snorted, spat and then went toward the only other door. I was surprised to see it opened on a dark staircase. I shivered a bit, remembering the cellar in Gorm and realizing that Nori had been imprisoned in a dark place after all.

Dori and Ori went in before me, directly following the man and I was the last one to walk in. We arrived in a small room that was lit by two candles. There was no door but a corridor and on each side of the corridor there were metallic bars that formed small cells. At the other end I could see three little opening close to the ceiling, that barely let some light in. I shivered from the cold. Even though it was summer and the weather had been quite warm outside, the temperature in this place was surprisingly low and the atmosphere was damp.

I could actually see the moisture slightly reflecting the light on the walls.

I swallowed thickly and took a quick breath.

I hoped I hadn't.

The smell in there was terrible. It was actually worse than in the city. It was so strong and pungent that it almost made me gag.

Had they put Nori in here for weeks?

How could they put anyone, any living being in such a place? Did they call this a prison? I wished the prisoners who complained back in my previous world could see this. Now that was what I called inhuman living conditions.

Ignoring completely the fat man who was talking about one thing or another, playing with the dwarves' patience, I took it upon myself to step in the corridor. The little light wasn't enough to really see anything in here but I could distinguish several forms lying on the grounds in the furthest cells. I didn't think. I just walked further in, quickly going closer to the dark silhouettes. Apparently Dori, Ori and the man hadn't realized yet I had been walking to the cells.

There were two cells at the back and then four on each side of the corridor. I could see four, no five forms in the cells, two in the furthest ones, two on the right side and one on the left. The cells in the back were narrower but larger than the ones on the sides and the bars from the side cells arrived in the middle of the furthest ones' bars. My gaze automatically went to the furthest cells, in the right one, the person wasn't lying but sitting in the corner and seemed shorter. I couldn't properly distinguish his features and couldn't see whether his hairdo was particular or not.

Still my instincts screamed at me that this was Nori.

Forgetting about everything else, my vision narrowed on this figure and I strode there. I walked to the cold metallic bars and didn't hesitate to hold them, pressing myself in the angle between that cell and the first one of the right side.

"Nori" I breathed out, worry strangling my voice.

The form in the corner stirred a bit and I realized it was him, though he didn't seem really conscious.

"Nori…" I repeated softly, hoping to get a reaction from him.

"Mi…Mizimul…" He whispered but it felt as if he didn't actually see me.

My heart fell in my stomach at the horror it must have been to live in there. I felt tears burn the back of my eyes but now wasn't the time to be emotive. I needed to wake Nori, to make him realize I was real. I wanted nothing more than to grab him and ran away from this place. Nori's unresponsiveness was terrifying me. I needed him to look at me. To see me.

"Nori!" I whispered once more.

But this time I didn't have the time to observe his reaction as a filthy hand crashed on my wrist and crushed it painfully. I startled but couldn't escape the strong grip. My eyes followed the long, dirty arm that had shot from the other side of the metallic bars and belonged to a fine specimen of horrific human male. The filth that covered him blackened his skin, clung in his greasy hair and in his bushy beard. It wouldn't have surprised me to see flees and head lice crawling on his skin. My stomach actually churned at the sight of this prisoner.

I felt a scream caught in my throat and I was frozen until he tried to tug me closer to his cell. Even though he was skinny and probably weakened by his stay here, the man was still stronger than me. Just as I was about to be pulled towards him, another hand shot from between the bars that separated the two cells from one another and grabbed the man's other forearm, clutching it in a vice-like grip.

"Let her go." My heart leapt when I recognized Nori's voice in the low growl that had just been uttered.

"Leave me alone, dwarf!" The prisoner hissed, though it was certainly in pain. "Told ya everythin'."

I could see Nori's hand tightening his grip on the man's arm.

"Let her go or I'll break your wrist." Nori calmly growled.

The pressure immediately loosened and I tugged free from the man's grip. Nori still clutched his wrist for several seconds before he let go and as soon as he did, the prisoner quickly moved to the opposite side of his cell.

My heart was pounding loudly in my chest and my eyes were glued on Nori. When he slowly turned to face me I held my breath. He looked so worn, so tired. I had never seen him like this. Hurt and bleeding, yes. But like this? No. This was different.

"Amelia" He murmured and I couldn't read his emotions.

I met his eyes and my heart skipped several beats. I felt my body quickly move closer to the bars, trying my best to come nearer him, but he didn't move. I wanted to embrace him so much. I wanted to see for myself whether he was hurt or not.

"Nori" I whispered rather brokenly.

There was enough space between the bars for me to pass my whole arm through, so I did, while my eyes were still locked with his. Immediately he extended his hand and caught mine, sending a strange shiver through my body that I ignored completely. I couldn't think about anything. I was completely caught up in Nori's gaze.

The look in his eyes was so intense that I couldn't move, could barely breath. It was a strange mixture of surprise, and shock at seeing me here I guessed, but there was pain too. Nori was looking at me as if he couldn't quite believe I was there. Seeing that he had to live in such a hellhole for who knew how long, I could understand his disbelief at meeting me here.

I wondered at some point why he didn't move closer. I squeezed his hand, I wasn't about to let it go. But the distance he kept was somehow bothering me. He was staying at arm's length and I was forced to tear my eyes away from his to take a better look at him.

His hair was dishevelled, reminding me of the time he had been so hurt, but his beard was still somewhat properly braided. He was only wearing his thin purple linen shirt and his breeches. I had no idea where they had put his other clothes but I knew that with so little on even a dwarf would have felt the bitter cold of this place and shivered in the humidity. Then my eyes fell on the ground and I saw that even his shoes had been taken away from him, leaving him barefoot against the cold, humid and filthy ground.

But what made me gasp in horror and brought angry tears in my eyes was the cold, hard metallic device that I saw circling his ankle.

"They chained you?" I breathed out, my eyes stuck on the long chain that linked Nori to the furthest wall, explaining why he didn't move closer.

He didn't answer my question, there was no need to, but his silence was starting to unnerve me. Even though Nori had never been talkative, it felt odd that he wouldn't at least try to talk with me. I looked at his face more attentively and saw a small sheen on his forehead and took in the pale, almost greyish colour of his skin, the hollowness of his cheeks...he hadn't been fed properly and with the cold, humidity and the general filthiness of this place it was not really a surprise to discover he was sick.

Not being surprised didn't mean I wasn't immediately worried though.

I squeezed his hand.

Immediately after, our gazes met. My eyes were teary. Nori's grey one displayed mostly tiredness, hurt and a bit of fear. At that moment I wished for nothing more than to take him in my arms. I wanted to take him away, to protect him, to heal him. I had always been protected by him. It was slightly odd to be the one feeling such strong protectiveness towards him.

I was about to talk when a loud voice startled me.

"Hey! Ya! Get outta here! Don't touch the prisoner!" The warden yelled, making me jump.

"We're here to pay his bail, so now you will open his cell and we'll be gone!" Dori coldly said.

I realized then that the ward had been talking all this time with the two dwarves and, seeing Ori's face, they probably hadn't been talking about pleasant topics. And now they were all marching towards me.

"Fine!" The man spat. "It'll be twenty-five gold and twenty silvers."

"That's not what was asked!" Ori exclaimed outraged.

"I'm the one who decides the price! Pay up or leave." The man's grin made me shiver in disgust.

I hadn't let go of Nori's hand though and I couldn't help but strengthened my grip on it. I wasn't leaving this place without him.

"The price was twenty gold coins. That's what we'll pay." Dori coldly replied.

"If you want to reduce the price, then you better find something to offer me instead." The warden was leering at me.

As a result I pressed my back closer to the cold and hard metal behind me. I felt Nori's hold tighten almost painfully on my hand. My shoulder was starting to feel the strain from being torn in such an odd way but I just couldn't let go.

"If the lady agrees to have some quality…"

He didn't even have the possibility to finish because Dori's hand shot and grabbed him by the collar. The height difference didn't bother the dwarf because in one, hard yank he forced the man to bend down until Dori could look in his eyes without tilting his head.

"You will not ever speak about her again. You will not ever look at her and not even think about her. Is that clear?" The cold tone Dori used was frightening and even I could hear the threat hidden behind his words.

Ori had come closer to me, shielding me with his body and I realized I was slightly shaking.

"Ah…I…" The warden stammered.

"We will pay ten gold coins for my brother's bail and we'll leave after you give him back everything, and I said everything, he owned when he was thrown in here. Understood?"

I was flabbergasted at seeing Dori like this. I had thought him fierce when he had defended me against Thorin. Well now I knew that I hadn't seen anything special until now. He was looking simply ferocious at the moment and his steely gaze was promising pain if the man didn't do as he was told. The fact that he used this moment to reduce the price in half was a bit surprising, but I guessed he was right to do so.

I honestly wasn't surprised when the greasy and fat warden nodded his agreement and shakily took the keys that dangled at his side. I finally let go of Nori's hand, if reluctantly, and glanced at Nori. He was staring absentmindedly at the floor. Ori and I stepped aside as he opened the door with a loud creak and went to unlock the chain around Nori's ankle. I realized at that moment that both his ankles had actually been chained and I felt my blood boil in outrage and my heart clenched painfully.

The warden briskly walked back to the open room where there was a small desk, quickly followed by Dori. Ori and I didn't move, eyes set on Nori who took a tentative step toward his cell's door, then another. When he walked past me I brushed his hand lightly with mine and I managed to squeak in a low voice.

"Are you alright?"

"Aye." He breathed out.

That would have to be enough for now.

Ori and I did exchange a dubious look though as we each walked on one side of Nori.

It took us maybe ten or fifteen more minutes before we stepped out of this hellhole. Dori's back was stiff; I could see it as he walked ahead of Ori, Nori and me. As soon as the wooden door slammed shut behind us, Dori talked without looking at us.

"Let's get back home now."

I glanced toward Nori.

The sunlight didn't allow for anything to be dissimulated; I could see a bruise on one side of his face but it was already healing. What worried me more was that he seemed to try his best not to limp but when one knew his usual swift strides, it was easy to see something was wrong.

"I think we should find a secluded place where we could camp." I said loudly enough for the three brothers to hear me.

"And near the river too." Ori added.

Dori glanced back at us and I saw the flash of hurt in his eyes as he looked at his younger brother. His jaw clenched and he finally turned and came to stand just in front of Nori.

"Can you walk?" He whispered softly.

Nori looked up at him and obviously tried to appear fine, but he didn't fool any of us. We needed to find a safe place to camp, a place where I could properly examine him.

"I'm fine…" He muttered but I chose to voice my thoughts.

"Dori, we really should stop soon."

The oldest brother looked at me and nodded. It pained me to see the three dwarves so hurt. Even though Nori was the only one to physically hurt, it was evident that Dori and Ori were as pained as I was to see him like this. We probably were quite a depressing bunch right now.

We decided to follow the river instead of crossing town again. There was a small forest several miles further upriver and we hoped to get there before the night. After twenty minutes spent walking rather slowly though, our plan seemed unachievable.

Nori just couldn't hide his pain anymore.

When he stumbled Ori and I barely managed to catch him before he fell.

"Dori!" I exclaimed, calling the stronger dwarf for help.

In a heartbeat he was here, helping Nori to the ground gingerly.

The thief was panting quick shallow breaths and had brought a hand to his side. He couldn't quite mask the wince of pain as his hand made contact with his ribs and I immediately knew that he had at least one broken one. Nori was strong, to see him so weak could only mean he had been pretty beaten up.

I immediately started to look around in my bag and brought out my water skin. Holding it in front of Nori's lips I encouraged him to drink.

"We have to find a safe place soon." I repeated while I helped him quench his thirst.

"The woods would be safer than here. We're too exposed and I don't trust this warden."

"I don't think he'll make it to the woods Dori." I softly whispered.

"Maybe we could carry him?" Ori offered, sadness shadowing his features.

It was strange that Nori didn't even try to voice his opinion. I was certain he hated being so weak but his silence was just another sign of how unwell he actually was.

My eyes fell on my long staff.

"A stretcher" I whispered, catching the dwarves' attention. "We could do a stretcher. I think he has a broken rib, we shouldn't move him too brutally and if you carry him in your arms or on your back, you might make him move in the wrong way. With a stretcher he'll be more stable."

Dori nodded and gently helped Nori to lie on the ground. The younger brother didn't even flinch. His eyes were closed and it was now very easy to see he was more than tired. He was sick.

"We can use one of our coats and your staff, but we'll need another one." Dori thought aloud.

"I can run to the woods to find one?" Ori proposed but Dori shook his head.

"That wouldn't be safe and it might take you too much time to find."

"He could go to town." I said.

"And buy a staff?"

"No, a broom. It'd be cheaper." I shrugged.

"I don't like the idea to have you roaming alone in that men's town." Dori groaned, looking at his little brother.

"Then you go and we stay here with Nori." I replied, now wasn't really the time to deal with Dori's protectiveness.

It took several more minutes to come to an agreement but Dori finally relented and quickly left us. While he was gone, I thought I would be able to start tending to the dwarf but he had actually managed to fall asleep while we talked. I barely resisted the urge to pass my fingers through his hair and was starting to ponder on this weird feeling when Ori caught my attention.

"Amelia…"

My head snapped up to look at Ori after he all but whimpered my name. He was on the verge of tears. Quickly I walked around Nori and knelt beside Ori, hugging him strongly.

"It'll be fine Ori. Everything will be fine."

"He was in there for…more than two weeks…"

"I know." A large lump formed in my throat at the thought.

"He looks so…"

"I know." I inhaled deeply before digging what remnants of courage I had and tried to speak in a calm and even tone. "Look at the bright side of things Ori."

"What bright side?"

"You won't have to wipe his blood from the floor this time."

That managed to make him breath out a small chuckle. We stayed in the arms of one another for awhile more before I let go of him. Ori then decided to go replenish our water skin in the river and just as quickly as he decided that, he was gone from my side. As I sat near Nori I couldn't help but look at him.

I didn't have the strength to let Ori finished his sentence before, but in my mind I had heard the word.

Nori looked broken.

I knew logically that it must be the exhaustion due to the inhuman conditions of this so-called prison, but I couldn't silence the fear in my heart. Gingerly I let my hand brush against his and almost startled when he moved slightly to graze my fingers between his. I felt a strange twist in my stomach as my eyes immediately went to find his half open grey ones.

"Thanks." He whispered before dozing off again.

It left me puzzled. Why was he thanking me? Was it because of Ori? Was it because we were trying our best to make sure he was alright? It couldn't possibly be because we came, could it?

Gently, I took his hand between both of mine and held it until Ori came back, then only did I reluctantly let go. It wasn't long before Dori came back and the two dwarves made quick work of crafting a stretcher. We were forced to wake up Nori to help him lie on the stretched coat but he was so tired that he barely opened his eyes before closing them again. Dori walked behind, holding the two staffs near Nori's head and both Ori and I held on one handle each near Nori's feet as we walked in the front.

This time, we didn't stop as we walked toward the relative safety provided by the woods. I ignored the pain in my arm and shoulder. I wanted us all to be safe.

We arrived under the trees' shadows late in the afternoon but we pushed further in, trying to get as far from town as possible. After a while, Dori decided we could stop in a place where there was some decent space between the trees nearby the river shore.

Immediately we set up the camp. Dori taking care of gathering wood and lighting a fire while I asked Ori to gather as much water as possible in our little cauldron and pan and put it to boil.

Meanwhile I knelt near Nori's shoulder and gently tried to wake him.

"Hey there" I whispered with a small smile when his eyes fluttered open.

"Amelia?" His voice was hoarse as he whispered my name.

"Yes. You're fine, we bailed you out. I have to check your injuries. Can you tell me where it hurts?" I tried to speak as softly as possible.

I saw him wince as he tried to move and stopped him from doing so by putting a hand on his shoulder. He froze immediately.

"Nori, now isn't the time to show me your strength. I know perfectly well how strong you are. Now tell me where it hurts?" I kindly chastised him.

He turned his head away from me and seemed to battle against himself before he softly answered.

"My chest and back."

I nodded and told him I was going to help him remove his dark linen shirt when he grabbed my wrist.

"You should…" He hesitated. "You should let Dori do it."

I frowned but didn't lower my gaze, nor did I let his shirt go.

"I'm the healer here Nori. Not your brother. Let me do my job."

In the end Dori did have to help because Nori didn't have enough strength to sit upright without leaning on something or someone. Once we removed his shirt I gasped loudly and both my hands flew to my mouth. I didn't realize that Dori had had the same reaction while looking at his brother's back.

Nori's chest was covered in bruises and I was reminiscent of the time when Bofur and Fili were caught. This time though there was an awful mix of days old and fresh bruises, giving his skin a mismatched tone. When I managed to tear my eyes away from the sight I met Dori's furious eyes and, even though my heart fell in my stomach in dread, I felt obliged to look at Nori's back.

Ten long stripes bared his shoulder blades.

My eyes widened.

My brain didn't understand what those were. It was only when I came closer and lightly brushed one of those stripes with one finger that I realized it was dried and clotted blood.

I blinked.

What had caused such injuries?

The lines criss-crossed on his back, all of them were bloody.

It was really lucky that his shirt hadn't clung to the wounds.

I looked, uncertain at Dori. He was furious. Had anyone else been here, I was rather sure that Dori would have scared them away. Ori was now striding back, his hands holding the cauldron full of water. When his eyes fell on Nori's battered body, he gasped loudly like I had and let the cauldron fall heavily on the ground.

"They beat you!" He exclaimed but Nori didn't react.

Dori didn't either and my eyes were now riveted on those stripes.

Several thoughts passed through my mind. Could it be made with a knife? But why would anyone torture someone like this? Right, medieval era. At least they hadn't cut his limb or …

And then it dawned on me what exactly those marks were.

I jolted away, eyes wide and scared. I didn't yelp or gasp though, I had lost my voice. Dori could only look at me, he couldn't let go of his brother or Nori would fall. After several long seconds the shock wore off and I scooted quickly towards Nori.

"Oh my god…" I finally managed to whisper. "Oh my god…"

I felt blood rush in my ears as fury boiled in my veins.

"Amelia? Are you alright?" Ori managed to ask taking a step towards me.

"Ori get that water boiling! I need it!" I said sharply.

The younger brother obeyed and scuttled back to the river. Dori was observing me and I saw from his slumped shoulders that Nori was upset I had seen his wounds. So that was what he didn't want me to see. That was why he had wanted only Dori to tend to his injuries. Well, that was also why I would do my best not to let Ori see this.

"Amelia, are you alright?" Dori repeated Ori's earlier question.

"They whipped him." I gritted through my teeth. "Those bastards, those idiotic barbarians whipped him and didn't care for the wounds."

As I spoke, I pressed my hand against Nori's forehead. He was warm and his skin was damp with sweat. I moved a bit, I needed him to answer a few more questions. Fear started to spread in my heart when I saw he was dozing off.

"Nori, how long have you had this fever? Nori? Nori?" I patted his cheek to catch his feverish attention.

I saw his eyes flutter open and he looked at me. It was obvious that he was sick and in pain. The fact that he had managed to act as if everything was fine earlier was a feat.

"Nori, for how long have you feel feverish?"

He looked at me and I wasn't sure he understood until he rasped an answer.

"Days…three? Four?"

The simple fact that he didn't know exactly how long it had been told me that it was bad.

I resisted the urge to scream in anger and swallowed back my fury for the moment. There were more pressing things to do right now than go back to that town and tear it down.

I pressed my hand against Nori's cheek and felt a sharp twinge in my heart when he let his head press harder against it. Didn't he have enough force to hold his head at all?

"I'm going to patch you up. It might hurt and I'm really sorry." I whispered to him but he didn't really react.

When I looked up at Dori his face was blank but his eyes were teary.

Meanwhile Ori had managed to put some water on the roaring fire and it soon was boiling. I took my satchel and all the medicinal equipments I had taken. Silently thanking Oin for his foresight. I spread my clean coat on the floor near Nori and put everything I would need on it. Clean bandages and clean linen cloth, the jars of ointment for his bruises, the honey for his back. Then I grabbed my satchel and sorted the dried plants out. Thyme, Echinacea, lavender and mint, I would probably need all of those as well as the willow bark powder.

When Ori was about to come closer I asked him to pour the hot water in the two bowls I only used for medicinal purposes and then sent him to gather some more water. We would need it and that would occupy the young dwarf. And at least we wouldn't be thirsty…

"Thank you." Dori softly whispered.

I didn't look at him as I put thyme and mint in the water and waited for them to infuse before I started to clean Nori's wounds.

"What for?" I asked him.

"For stopping Ori to see this…" His soft answer was barely audible.

I glanced at the oldest brother and attempted to smile.

"Of course I won't let him see. No need to thank me for that."

Cleaning the wounds wasn't complicated, but I was hurting Nori a bit, I could see it every time the skin on his back would twitch and he would stir or flinch in Dori's hold. Once the dried, clotted blood was removed I realized some of the wounds were infected and I swore.

It took quite some time to clean his back properly and then apply the honey. I then took care of his bruises, applying the ointment made by Oin, being especially generous in the area of his left ribs; two of them were broken. I then bandaged his chest and asked Ori to prepare an infusion of chamomile, lavender and Echinacea as well as some light vegetable broth if he could. Luckily we had kept potatoes and carrots with us, not eating them in the first part of our journey.

Before Dori could let Nori sleep on his back, I added one extra blanket we had taken with us, spreading it on a clean area to form a mattress of sort. If it could help diminish the pain in his back even slightly, that would be amazing. I then gave him some water mixed with the willow bark powder. As Nori lay asleep, I probed his legs lightly wondering whether his limp had been caused by another injury. Not finding anything I removed his boots, remembering the chains around his ankle. I was sadly not surprised to find the skin raw and bloodied.

Once I had cleaned and taken care of all his injuries, I woke him up again and, with the help of Dori, we managed to force him to drink both the infusion and the broth with vegetables. We even offered some dried meat that I had cut in pieces and turned into mush with boiling water. If he disliked the fact that he was fed like a baby Nori didn't voice it, and soon he was back to sleep.

Dori, Ori and I remained silent for a while. I really had no idea how to deal with this situation. I had come to terms with the violence of this world, but seeing Nori like this was just wrong.

It was late when Ori finally relented and agreed to sleep, and it was only on the condition that Dori would wake him really early in the morning.

I sat near the fire, near Nori when I decided to speak. If I couldn't understand the situation, I could as well ask someone.

"Dori, why did they…do that?"

The old dwarf shrugged and rubbed his forehead, letting a long sigh out.

"I'm not sure Amelia. Dwarves usually don't treat their prisoner like this. We would have to ask Nori." He paused for several minutes before asking me. "Will he be alright soon?"

"I'm not too sure." I forlornly said. "This fever…" I shook my head and tried to focus on what should be done. "It'll be better if he could bathe properly, but that won't happen until we're back in the Halls. I think we should use the stretcher but that would slow us down quite a bit."

"What if…we stopped in Gorm?" Dori cautiously hesitated.

I couldn't help but snort.

"Well, I'm not sure this town is good for dwarves' health. But it might be necessary." I frowned. "How long would it take for us to arrive in Gorm?"

"If we go straight there…three days, two if we move fast. It isn't far, but we have to make a detour to cross the Little Lune river."

"Is there another closer town we could go to?"

"No" He breathed out in a defeated tone. "What will happen to him?"

"Nori's strong. If he can rest and eat properly, he should be fine." I replied resolutely. "I'm just…it's just that seeing him like this makes me anxious."

Dori nodded.

"Would it be safe to stay here for a few days? It might be enough for him to gather some strength again." I wondered.

"It might be our best option. Besides, he wouldn't agree to be carried on a stretcher."

Right, damn the dwarves' stupid pride.

"Tomorrow I'll go hunt for some fresh meat." Dori added.

"And Ori and I will stay here." I replied as I stared at the flames.

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><p>I was awoken before dawn by Ori. We had decided to keep watch and as usual now, I was taking the last one. I sat in the silence of the night. Not doing anything and starting to slowly doze off when I heard a noise. I couldn't tell exactly what had startled me. I sat wide awake, waiting for whatever happened to occur again. After several minutes I heard it, a muffled moan.<p>

Immediately I shot to my feet and went to kneel beside Nori.

He was awake and his face was a mask of pain. His eyes were closed and I doubted he had heard me, when I put a hand on his forehead his eyes opened and caught my own.

"Amelia?"

"Shh, where does it hurt? Is it your back?"

I slid my hand from his forehead to his cheek, focusing entirely on him. He clenched his jaw and gave a small sharp nod.

"Alright. Do you think you can sit upright if I help you?"

"Aye" He breathed out.

The bandages I had wrapped him in were bloodied and I winced. I quickly took some water we had boiled and then put in a corked water skin once cooled. I had just finished taking care of him when the sun started to rise in the horizon behind the trees.

Dori and Ori were still asleep.

I helped Nori to put back a clean shirt, thankfully Dori had taken several spare which indicated he knew more or less what we were going to find in Lunetown. After that though, Nori sat in silence for awhile.

"You should rest." I gently chastised him.

He nodded but didn't move and I started to worry. Quickly I pressed my hand once more on his forehead. It really didn't seem as if he was too feverish.

"Amelia, I…" He visibly swallowed thickly before he continued. "Why did you come?"

I tried my best not to be offended by his question, but that was hard. I couldn't believe he would actually ask me something that stupid.

"Because you needed me. Because Dori and Ori needed me. Had the role been reversed, wouldn't you have come?" I barely managed not to snap, but wasn't far from it anyway.

His grey eyes seemed to reflect so many things at that moment that I couldn't catch all the emotions it displayed. I knew there was some hurt, some concern too as well as gratitude. But there was something else, something that somehow managed to catch my breath away but that I couldn't name.

"Thank you."

Gingerly I let my hand graze his. I hesitated a bit before slowly sliding my fingers between his. It felt odd somehow. But odder still was the fact that it soothed me, that I seemed to need this simple touch.

Nori didn't say anything but I could feel his eyes on me. I refused to look at him, slightly embarrassed by my actions but unwilling to let go. After hearing his words, I squeezed his fingers lightly and swallowed back the lump in my throat to reply.

"Don't thank me, idiot. Just get better soon."

He nodded and I had to help him lie back again.

Staying awake, I let my thoughts wander.

That morning seemed as good a time as any to finally put some order in my feelings.

I knew by now that my heart considered Dori and Ori like brothers. They were family and I loved them tenderly. I knew that I liked Bofur, Bombur and Bifur too. They were good friends. My training sessions with Bifur had helped me see, even though we couldn't communicate, the fierce loyalty and the odd kindness Bifur felt for those he considered his friends. The three dwarves were now a part of my life too, just as much as the three brothers. They were maybe my closest friends.

Then there was Oin and Dís. Both of them were clearly mentors I looked up to. Dís even more so because she was as well helping me adapt to dwarvish culture, whereas Oin was helping me only with healing. Danà for her part had become something akin to a mother figure, even though we weren't that close yet. I couldn't imagine my life without the three of them. Just like I had gotten used to the quiet support Balin provided me with. I didn't see him as much as I would like to, simply because my poor guardian was drowning under tons of paperwork for our King.

I had even become somewhat close with the grunting Dwalin and the grumbling Gloin. I could now discern the praise in between the grunts and I even managed to have discussion with Dwalin without being nervous. I guessed that being at the receiving end of their ire during training sessions would release me of any anxiety when they weren't armed.

And somehow surprisingly during these past months, I had become rather close to Fili, Kili and Gimli. The three younger dwarves were obviously closer in age with me, but sometimes it felt as if Gimli and Kili were younger while Fili and I were very similarly minded. It was refreshing to be childish and silly with the three of them, especially when all my other friends and acquaintances were all far past their nineties.

God that sounded odd.

But even though I could put a name on all my relationships with the other dwarves, friends, family, mentor…I seemed unable to do so with Nori.

An idea was nagging the back of my mind but I refused to acknowledge it. I liked Nori. I loved him, just like I loved Dori and Ori. No more, no less. He was family.

Nori was family.

I should have been happy to come to a conclusion, but strangely, it only left a sort of sour aftertaste in my mouth.

Nori was family…

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><p><strong>AN I don't know how to express how thankful I am for all the kind comments and reviews I'm receiving. Thanks a lot everyone. Without your support, I'm not sure I would have come that far already :) Thanks to all the guests too! I can't answer personally to all your reviews, but I'm truly thankful for each of them. **

**I'm sorry for updating quite so late. I'm truly having trouble concentrating on writing right now. **

**I hope you enjoyed this chapter...and that all of those who wanted to hit Nori don't want to anymore :P I guess now you want to hit Amelia :D **

**About the amount of money they had to pay, I'll admit I had no idea what to put...so it's completely random.**

**I wonder whether you liked their reunion or not. I didn't want it to be fluffy or too mushy. I hope no one was shocked by the mentions of violence. I thought it was very light, so I didn't add any warning before hand.**

**I'll try to update one more chapter during the week. I'm guessing probably before the weekend. **

**Thanks for your support everyone :) You're all very kind and amazing!**


	32. Unexpected Turn of Events

**It all belongs to JRR Tolkien, except for my OC and the plot.**

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><p>The next few days were rather tiring for everyone. I didn't get much sleep. I couldn't. I had been angry at first, I had wanted to hit someone, to make someone pay, and I knew Dori felt the same. But the sad truth was there was nothing we could do, no one we could blame but Nori. So we kept silent and pushed back our anger. Who could be angry at Nori when he was covered in bruises from head to toe, and when his punishment after having been caught had been so barbaric?<p>

I still couldn't quite put my head around the fact that people were whipped here.

It was sickening.

But after the anger, the worry kept me awake too. I couldn't tear my eyes away from Nori for long, I would check his temperature often, make certain he was comfortable and force him to drink and eat properly. My thoughts were mostly occupied by him.

Thankfully I had Ori and Dori with me. The three of us were all suffering similar feelings and having to take care of Nori once again, worrying for him, was a painful experience we went through together. Dori was in charge of hunting, though Ori argued his slingshot would be more efficient for the task. But seeing that one of his younger brothers was already badly hurt, Dori didn't want to take the chance to have Ori walking around alone in the woods.

No one could begrudge him such thoughts.

Ori and I were stuck together and hadn't the situation been so serious, it would have been sort of funny. The only time we got to leave the camp was during the first day's afternoon when Dori decided to help Nori bath in the river. I did order the two brothers to be careful with Nori's wounds, but I hadn't even tried to ask to stay. For obvious reasons I couldn't help or observe what was going on, so Ori ended up coming along as we searched the woods for wild edible berries.

That first evening, everyone, even Nori, enjoyed some fresh strawberries. IT cheered us up. I teased Ori, reminding him that dwarves weren't supposed to enjoy fruits and in the end he had grumpily modified his usual statement in order not to share his portion.

We stayed three complete days in the woods.

The nourishing food, the clear water, the medicinal plants and the relatively clean environment did wonders on Nori's health. Of course it didn't mend his broken bones or didn't knit back the torn skin. But his bruises were fading slowly and there was no more sign of infection on his back. Thankfully his fever didn't last long, on the morning of the second day he had already regained enough strength to sit on his own and he didn't spend the whole day sleeping.

Of course that fact brought another issue.

If Nori wasn't sleeping, then that meant we could question him…and that first real discussion didn't go well.

We had just finished breakfast on the third day when Dori decided to speak his mind. It was easy to see he had been refraining himself during the previous days. His worries for his brother had been stronger than his disapproval. Now that Nori seemed well enough though, Dori's disapproval and anger seemed stronger than ever.

"What happened this time Nori? Who did you try to steal?" Dori's voice was unnaturally cold.

Nori frowned and shifted a bit. I glanced up from my bowl and realized that all three brothers were angry. Dori was glaring at Nori, who glared right back despite being clearly tired. My eyes didn't stay on them and I glanced toward Ori. He was clutching at his bowl tightly and was staring at the ground between his feet. I couldn't see his face but something told me he was far from being fine.

"I didn't try to steal anything." Nori retorted before Ori shocked everyone and interrupted him harshly.

"Stop it! You're a thief! Nothing but a thief! We know perfectly you're stealing good people for your own profit!" Ori spat.

My eyes widened in shock at hearing Ori rant, it was just so out of character for him. He was still staring at the ground and clearly refused to look up. Somehow I was suddenly afraid to see the expression on his face. From the lack of interruption I gathered Dori and Nori were just as shell-shocked as I was and Ori kept on ranting.

"You always talk of pride and honour, but what do you know? Where's your honour? Where's your pride? For Mahal's sake you're a bloody thief! Nothing but a thief! And a bad one at that, or you wouldn't get caught by stupid men! Don't you feel ashamed?" He spat and something snapped in me too.

"Ori!" I cried out loud.

The young dwarf finally looked up and glared at me. I didn't even twitch and met his gaze without flinching.

"Don't you dare speak like that!" I all but growled.

"What do you know Amelia? You've been here a year, he was a thief already decades before you were even born!" He narrowed his eyes at me.

"Ori!" Dori finally bellowed.

He was about to say something but Ori didn't give him enough time.

"And you," He pointed at Dori. "You're always saying that Nori is a bad example and that Ma would be ashamed!" He exclaimed angrily. "Well, I don't care for his example, and I am the one who's ashamed!"

The words pronounced seemed to ring in my ears minutes after we had all grown silent. Nori's head was hanging low, his shoulder slumped and feeling probably ten times worse than he looked. Dori was clearly taken aback by his 'baby' brother's rant, and his eyes were wide and his mouth slightly agape.

My heart was pounding loudly in my chest and I was simply flabbergasted.

The words Ori had said…I could only imagine how much it pained Nori.

I glanced towards Ori. The youngest brother shifted awkwardly and when he glimpsed at me I saw the regret and fear in his eyes, but damn that dwarf's pride he didn't say a word. Instead he jumped jerkily to his feet and strode away in the forest, leaving us in a shocked silence. After maybe a minute, Dori sent me a questioning look and I nodded, he replied in kind and quickly stood too to go after his younger brother.

I was left alone with Nori and I had no idea what to do or say.

I was pretty sure that most of Ori's words were not truly expressing what he felt. These past days had been stressful for all of us and I knew Ori was deeply hurt when he saw Nori in this hellhole. From what I understood, Nori had taken care of his brother a lot when they were both younger and the older brother had been somewhat of a hero to a young fatherless dwarf. It was possible that seeing Nori so weak remembered Ori of his late mother too and that had to be hurtful.

I sighed.

What a mess.

Slowly I made my way to sit just next to Nori, our shoulders almost touching.

"He's right, isn't he?"

This low, broken voice startled me. It was so unlike the usual confident, slightly smug tone that Nori used.

"I'm just a thief after all. My brothers would be better off without me."

The anger I had felt against Ori had abated, but Nori's word rekindled the fire and I snapped. Turning towards him I sharply whacked him behind the head and chastised him.

"Stop being so stupid! Can't you tell that Ori's upset because he cares?"

He hadn't reacted at all after I whacked him. If anything he seemed to shrink a bit.

"Why did you even come here Amelia?" He sighed. "Why did you and Ori have to come? I would have been fine."

My throat tightened painfully and I had difficulties to speak. I felt like I was on an emotional rollercoaster. Anger had simply vanished at seeing Nori like this, so defeated. I was now hurting. How could he reject us like this?

"We came because we care." I insisted before repeating. "You needed us Nori. I will never leave you to rot in such places." My emotions were so strong that they were almost suffocating me.

"Amelia, he's right. I have no honour, no status. I'm not someone any good dwarf would associate with." He whispered without glancing at me.

"Then there're plenty of bad dwarves in Thorin's Halls." I deadpanned. "Bofur will be happy to find out he's not considered a good dwarf. I guess Gloin will be overjoyed to learn about it too."

I couldn't see his face but I saw him flinch a bit.

"Being my friend is not good for them. It's not good for anyone."

His words, his tone, his whole body language hurt me deeply. Somehow I had the feeling that his words were meant for me, even though he didn't say it. That hurt. That just hurt so much.

I suddenly felt like screaming. I wanted to cry and shout. I just lowered my head and blinked several times quickly to keep the tears at bay.

"Why don't you tell any of them what you told me? About those things you're looking for."

"What would it change? I'll still be nothing but a thief." He chuckled darkly as he repeated Ori's earlier words.

I couldn't stand it, following an impulse I suddenly twisted my body so that I could snake both my arms around his neck. I felt him waver and hiss a bit as one of his hands prevented us from falling and his other ones snaked around my waist.

"You're so much more than that Nori. I wish you could see…" I chocked a bit at the end and stopped talking completely.

"Mizimul…" He whispered brokenly and I strengthened my hold on him.

We held each other for a long time, until a broken twig reminded us we were not in the safety and the privacy of our home in Thorin's Halls. I let Nori go and swiftly grabbed my staff while standing up.

…Only to see both Dori and Ori arriving while talking together.

Ori's eyes were slightly puffy and red. But the small, yet slightly sad, smile on Dori's face reassured me that everything would soon be alright. Though I couldn't help but notice that this discussion should have happened decades ago. As Ori so wisely highlighted earlier, Nori had been a thief for quite some time now, it seemed odd that the three brothers had never really talked.

I knew for a fact that Ori didn't like conflicts. It wasn't like him to shout and yell. He was a calm and peaceful person, and it his earlier rant had shocked everyone, him included. I was absolutely certain that he had never said such words to Nori or Dori before. He had kept it inside until the moment it just had to blow up.

I knew too that Nori and Dori often argued with each other. Ori had told me that from time to time the two brothers wouldn't even speak to one another for months. It had reminded me of my own argument with Nori. I knew he was a brave dwarf, but he wasn't really open with his thoughts. Apparently, Nori would shut himself away instead of fighting with his family and friend. Ori had even once confided that for awhile, Nori barely came home at all.

I could guess that after decades of being a silent witness of these brotherly conflicts, Ori had the right to let it all out. It was only natural that his fears and frustrations would at some point result in some sort of angry rant. I was only surprised because I had expected Dori to be the one to talk like this to Nori.

From what I could see though, the effects of Ori's words seemed to have a stronger impact on Nori than Dori's would.

As I was lost in my thoughts for a short time, Ori walked straight to his brother and sat next to him. I could have cried when the two of them embraced and Ori gasped a shaky 'I'm sorry'. I smiled and sighed, relieved, before I walked to Dori.

"Is he alright?" We asked both at the same time, froze and then chuckled.

"When did I become one of the adults?" I joked.

"Ah, Amelia I think you always were…" Dori answered with a smile.

"Nori was pretty shaken I think." I whispered seriously then, glancing above my shoulder to see the two brothers talking together.

Nori avoided his younger brother's eyes, and Ori wasn't doing much better. But at least they were talking softly and calmly. I was completely reassured when they both leant to embrace each other at the same time.

"Ori too." Dori whispered, observing his brothers with me. "He didn't really mean any of it."

"I know." I nodded and sighed. "I'm not sure if you know or not, but Nori isn't really proud to be, well, a thief."

"He never said but I thought as much." Dori shook his head forlornly and I arched a questioning brow at him. "He's too proud to admit anything and anyway, Nori has always been discreet and secretive. But I can tell he's hiding something. He's been doing that for Mahal knows how long."

Dori then looked at me intently, deadly serious even. He was staring and that made me nervous.

"Amelia, if you know anything…"

"Dori…" I tried to interrupt but he raised a hand and I decided to hear him first.

"I won't ask you to betray a secret. But if you know at some point that the situation is too much for him to deal with alone…please come and tell me. He won't ask me for help, he's too proud for that."

"After today I think it's not that he's too proud. He just doesn't want to…bring dishonour on you too. Or something like that." I softly replied.

Dori tensed and our gazes locked for a minute.

"He's stupid…"

"That's what I said." I deadpanned.

Then I had to follow Dori as he walked towards his little brothers.

He stood proudly next to them both and crossed his arms above his chest, looking down sternly at the two younger dwarves.

"Listen to me well you two halfwits. I do not approve of Nori's choices, but that doesn't mean I will disown you. You're my brother. We're a family. That means we're here for each other. We stand together. Always. And that includes Amelia too now. Is that clear?"

Nori and Ori exchanged an uncertain glance. Apparently it had been a while since Dori had spoken to them in such a manner, everyone was getting too used to his mother hen tendencies. He acted the part of the older, wiser and sterner brother amazingly well.

"I said, is that clear?" He almost bellowed.

"Yes Dori." Nori and Ori chorused.

I was about to let a chuckle escape my throat when Dori's stern gaze turned to me. I chocked lightly, swallowing it back, before I could mutter like a properly chastised child.

"Yes Dori."

It was quite fun to see him like this. He usually was the first one to get angry at Nori. He was the one complaining about Nori's activities. In the end, it appeared to me that Dori didn't really care about what Nori did, what he cared about was that his brother wasn't safe. Truth be told, Dori wasn't really safe either when he went on the road with the other merchants. But at least it was still better than being a lonely thief. Besides, it had to hurt to always hear complains or comments about your own brother. I knew I wouldn't like hearing people badmouth Nori, surely it was even harder for his two brothers.

Still, it was clear now that, no matter what, Dori would still do his best to protect his brother. Even if Nori didn't want it. Even if he was a thief. No matter what, Dori would protect him.

"Good." He said with a nod. "Now, I don't want to witness any useless and meaningless fights between us for the next fifty years at least. Is that understood?"

"Yes Dori." Nori and Ori chorused, both of them pulling a face.

Then the three of them looked at me as I shrugged.

"I was just wondering whether I'll be alive or not in fifty years."

That was a bad thing to say. Obviously. All their eyes widened visibly and Ori paled. Quickly I tried to amend my words, to explain them. I didn't really understand why their reaction to my words was quite so strong. It seemed like a perfectly logical thing to say, even if a bit sad.

"I mean, I'm a human. I don't know how long humans lives around here but somehow I doubt they reach their eighties. I'm already twenty-six, if I'm still alive in fifty years I think that would already be rather miraculous."

I looked at each of them and saw how much those words actually affected them. Ori was horrified and I bit my lip violently, silently cursing my stupidity. Dori was looking at me with a sad frown and teary eyes. I couldn't watch that so my eyes turned to gaze at Nori. His face was frozen and he seemed lost, completely lost. I was about to talk again and try to change the topic when Ori blurted out.

"Where will you go?"

My mouth snapped back shut and I frowned. I didn't understand his question.

"What do you mean?"

"When you die, where will your soul go?" He turned towards his older brothers, a pleading look in the eyes.

Dori was startled and opened his mouth but no words came out. Nori was still completely frozen and his eyes stared at me, clearly uncertain and even slightly afraid. I had no idea what was going on in their minds. What had they expected? No one was immortal. Everybody had to die someday. It might have been a bit blunt, but my words were perfectly normal. I tried to answer Ori, but truly, I had no idea what to say.

"I…well nowhere? I mean, I'll be dead right? So…" I had never really believed in afterlife.

But now that I thought about it, and considering the fact that I was currently living in another world, maybe I should rethink my theories about god or gods. I did believe in something, well I thought I did at least. To tell the truth I had never really tried to question my beliefs. I had never actually taken the time to ponder those topics.

"Men's souls…they're… They're not." Dori stammered, trying to tell something to his brother while obviously trying not to shock him. "Ori, only dwarves are allowed in Mahal's halls."

I didn't really know what was going on, but I knew we had to change topic right about now. This was getting everyone in a terrible mood and frankly, we already had too much problem right now to think about things that hopefully wouldn't occur before decades. I did hope to live a long life, even though the odds seemed to be against me in this world.

"Alright, I'm not planning on dying soon, so please, can we talk about something else?"

It wasn't really efficient because, even if Dori tried to help me, it was clear that Ori and Nori were still lost in forlorn and depressing thoughts.

The usual cheerfulness of dwarves was forgotten that day and I spent it next to Nori, caring for him with Ori while I tried to avoid talking about anything that had to do with death or thievery.

I suddenly wanted to be back in Thorin's Halls. The familiarity of the place would surely help us forget about everything that had happened here. I wanted and needed some happy, peaceful time with the three brothers, it felt like an eternity since the last time it happened.

We spent most of the day together, and I only left them for a short while. After lunch, in the middle of the afternoon, Ori finally managed to convince Dori he could very well hunt alone. He left with the objective to find some dinner for us. Meanwhile I argued that I could survive by myself during the time it would take me to bath. I loved those three dwarves, but I needed some time alone. After battling with Dori, he had finally agreed that I deserved some privacy. I hadn't gone far.

I had been away from the camp for a short time. I wasn't stupid and didn't want to end up in more troubles. We had already enough on our hands with Nori being still so weakened. I wasn't even sure it was a good idea to start walking back with him in such a state.

I had walked a bit upriver and had bathed quickly. If there was one thing I really didn't like about this whole camping thing, it was the fact that the only chance I had to clean myself, was in running water. It was cold and it wasn't exactly comfortable to get naked in the wild where anyone could see you. The simple thought of someone popping out in the open and seeing me had me out of the water faster than I thought possible.

As I walked back towards our camp, my hair still wet, I tried to avoid walking on twigs and rocks. I didn't want to wear my shoes right then because my feet were still damp. I was cautious not to step on anything sharp while being barefooted. I was wearing my breeches and a dark cotton tunic because I didn't have much choice, but I was holding on my other clothes. When you had to carry everything on your back, you tended to bring only what was truly necessary; a towel wasn't on my list of vital items.

I was silent and focusing on the ground as I made my way back. It was probably one reason that could explain why Dori and Nori didn't hear me as I came closer to where they were sitting. The other reason clearly was that they were completely engrossed in their argument.

I instinctively stopped on my tracks and without meaning to, overheard them.

"I can't Dori. I just… I can't…" He seemed angry.

Really angry. But the tone of his voice reflected another emotion I couldn't pinpoint. I couldn't see him, so I wasn't sure, but his voice seemed more strained than ever. Was he still hurting so much? It didn't seem to be that though.

"It's not my fault. It's not anything awful either. I don't understand how you could ask me that…ask me not to…" The words seemed to be caught in his throat as he stuttered.

"And what other choice do you have?" Dori snapped back.

There was a second of silence during which I briefly realized I really shouldn't listen to their discussion. Whatever the topic was, it didn't concern me. It was between them. I shouldn't be there. As I decided to slowly and if possible silently go back the way I came, Dori spoke once more. He didn't sound angry anymore. If anything he sounded a bit sad.

"Nori…what could you offer in your situation? Think about it! What good could come out of this? Look at yourself for Mahal's sake!" His voice softened as he finally said. "What good would it do?"

Nori didn't answer and I barely managed not to gasp loudly. After all his kind words earlier, how could Dori be saying such harsh things about his brother? Nori was a good person. Alright, he was a thief and that was a really questionable choice of career. But on the other hand he was an honourable and reliable dwarf. I loved that about him.

I loved that… well, like a sister should.

I shook my head. Strange thoughts seemed to be plaguing me recently. Forcing my mind to go back to the original topic I wondered why Dori would be so harsh with Nori.

They were family. We were family. He shouldn't say things like that. Nori had plenty to offer. Maybe not monetary speaking, but he was a good friend, a loyal one.

I looked at the foliage that hid me and felt suddenly rather sad.

I took a few steps back and after a short while decided to finally meet with them, though this time I made some noise on purpose to let them know I was nearby. The two brothers seemed rather depressed when I sat with them. Nori didn't look at me at all and after a short while stood up with difficulties to walk away a bit on his own.

My eyes followed his silhouette.

No, I didn't understand Dori's words.

Nori was a great friend, I should be happy to be a part of his family. I should be content with that.

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><p>When we finally left the small camp and started our journey back home on the fourth day's morning, it soon became painfully obvious it would take us more time than usual. Even though Nori was feeling better, three days of relative rest in a forest couldn't really erase the effects of weeks of bad treatments he had received.<p>

His broken ribs ensured he couldn't breathe normally and all his other injuries were exhausting him quickly. He tried his best not to let it show, but I was observing him and I forced the dwarves to stop regularly, allowing Nori to take some much needed break. After watching him stumble on his own feet for the fifth time in a short time, we all agreed to stop early for an extended lunch break.

As soon as we stopped, I couldn't help but smile softly as Ori rushed to Nori's side to offer him water and some fruits he had collected here and there on the way. Dori hadn't allowed him to go too far from the path, but it was easy to spot trees baring fruits in the middle of the summer season.

It was heartening to see the two of them slowly but surely mend the little tear that their relationship had suffered. Dori was clearly pleased by this and hovered nearby, his eyes never straining far from his brothers and me. Little by little, the mood of our little group became lighter.

On the fifth day after we had delivered Nori, in the evening, I overheard Ori talk to Nori, while I was near the fire skinning some rabbit Dori had caught. Overhearing their conversations was starting to become too much of a habit to my taste, but this time at least, it was heart warming, not saddening.

"I'm not ashamed of you…I'm sorry."

"I know."

"I trust you nadad. I always have."

I pointedly avoided looking at them, and only looked up as Dori came to sit beside me. We exchanged a glance, both of us had heard, both of us were relieved. I couldn't help but smile during the whole evening and even the following morning.

* * *

><p>It had been a bit more than a week since we had bailed Nori out and we were now in the forest covering the mountain's side. It would probably take us two more days, maybe three, to finally arrive in Thorin's Halls.<p>

Right now we were in a small clearing. Nori was dozing off, clearly exhausted by that day's walk. Dori had finally agreed to let Ori hunt with him and so I was left trying to light a stupid fire. That didn't quite go as well as I would have wanted.

Nori was observing me, snorting lightly after my sixth failed attempt. I glared at him, rather annoyed with my own inability to get this stupid fire going. I was just about to complain when I saw him tense. His smirk disappeared in a second and his eyes flared with fear and I was about to ask him what was going on when I heard a soft noise behind me.

"Don't move." Nori whispered tensely.

His eyes were on mine, begging me not to move. My heart clenched at the emotion I could see in his gaze. I had no idea whether it was stupid or not, but I didn't exactly obey him. Slowly, inches by inches, I let my hand drift to my side where I knew my long staff was. At the first slight movement I made, Nori's eyes were riveted to my hand. I could see his silent plea, I could see his fear. He tried to slowly move too, but he immediately winced as he put some pressure on his torso. His face suddenly reflected his helplessness.

"Mizimul…" He breathed out when my fingers brushed against the cold polished wood I now knew well.

His eyes were wide and he shook his head slightly, begging me once more not to try anything. I heard the same noise again in my back but this time it had come closer to me. I closed my eyes and forced myself to inhale and exhale slowly while my fist grabbed my staff firmly. When I opened my eyes once more I clenched my teeth and slowly turned my head to the side to finally see whatever threat had come our way.

I had a firm hold on the wooden staff and only had the time to register a dark shape from the corner of my eyes. I heard Nori's anguished cry but didn't pay attention to it. Gloin, Dwalin and Bifur had made sure that I was trained to only focus on the fight while staying aware of my surrounding. They used to attack me when I wasn't expecting it, testing my reflexes all the time. Now was the perfect moment to put my training to a test.

As the dark shape seemed to leap toward me I jumped to the side and rolled on the floor ungracefully. I felt the sharp edge of a rock painfully jab me in the ribs but I didn't have the time to cry out or worry about it when I saw the large shape come towards me again.

A part of my brain registered that Nori yelled something but I didn't pay attention to it. My mind was entirely focused on the large wolf that had appeared in the middle of our camp. Thankfully my hand hadn't let go of my staff and it was only pure instinct that saved me from the animal's teeth when he jumped at me for the second time. I jerkily brought the wooden staff in front of me in a circular motion, hitting the wolf square on its muzzle.

I heard its yelp as it took a few tentative steps back, allowing me enough time to finally get on my feet properly and quickly take a look around.

The lesson had been painfully learned; I needed to stay aware of my surroundings.

There was thankfully only one wolf.

Nori was kneeling near the place where he had previously sat, and was supporting his weight on his left hand, his right one clasped above his ribs. I met his eyes for a second and saw how much he was afraid at that moment. Somehow I doubted he was afraid for himself.

A low growl forced me to look back at the creature I was facing. Slowly I started to make my way towards Nori while the wolf was eyeing me, walking in a large circle around me.

"Amelia, leave. Slowly go in the forest and leave." Nori was clearly delusional if he thought I would abandon him to this wolf's teeth.

"Nope." I said at the same time as the wolf jumped at me.

I was ready this time and in my mind, I pictured the wolf's head as the wooden sword that Gloin swung at me mercilessly. Though this time I had to always stay between the wolf and Nori and there was no second try if I failed to dodge.

I had to protect Nori.

I had to survive this.

For Nori, for Dori and Ori…and because I really didn't want to die here.

I sidestepped and brought the staff down, trying to hit the black head but the wolf landed further than I expected and immediately turned his head to bite me. It was a simple reflex than saved my leg as I jumped backwards with a yelp. The animal was already back on me, quicker and obviously more determined to hurt me than any of my mentor had ever been.

This time though I managed to hit one of its pawns, forcing it to retreat a bit.

"Amelia I beg you leave!" The urgency in Nori's voice made several painful knots appear in my stomach.

He sounded desperate. In a second I was able to see him. He was now holding something but I didn't have the time to see what. My attention had to remain on the wolf.

"I won't!" I snapped back while dodging the animal's teeth again and hitting its rear.

But this stupid move had opened the way for the wolf, which could now easily attack Nori. My heart simply stopped as I saw the moment when it decided to go for the wounded prey instead of the one that fought back.

"No!" I screamed as I saw it prepare itself to pounce.

I didn't think.

This time once more something broke in me as a protective instinct took control of my body and I jumped forward.

From the corner of my eyes I saw the wolf pounce in the same direction.

Something heavy crashed into me and I fell backwards.

Almost immediately, pain unlike anything I had ever felt exploded in my leg and radiated in my whole body.

I literally felt torn.

I yelled. I couldn't help it, couldn't stop it. Blood rushing in my ears, fear and pain clouding my mind, I didn't hear the several other voices that shouted at the same moment I did. My body fell just in front of Nori, heavily hitting the ground. An heavy weight was crushing me to the ground.

I couldn't breathe. My mind was overwhelmed by the pain in my leg. I was thankful when I felt the horrible weight being lifted away from me. Immediately after though, I cried out when something pressed roughly on my leg. I could feel tears fall freely on my cheeks as I gasped for breath. I was chocking, unable to calm myself enough to take a deep breath. My heart rate was skyrocketing and utter terror was running freely in my veins.

From behind the blur of the tears I could make out several shapes. My hands were clutching something tightly but I had no idea what it was. As one of the shapes came closer I felt the pain in my leg burn and explode once more.

I screamed.

Then I started to babble probably incoherently.

In my head I begged Nori, Dori and Ori to help, to make it stop. I cried out, repeating how it hurt. I wanted to call for the brothers, I needed them near me, instead I cried, and cried, and cried…

It was pathetic, really, but right then the shock and pain were too much for me to deal with.

Tears were blurring my vision. I was barely able to keep my eyes open as I bit my lip to avoid crying out again. It was so strange to have my eyes open but to only be able to see blurred shapes.

At some point it felt that whoever was here was trying to move me to some place or another.

I cursed them.

Didn't they see they were making it worse? They were hurting me!

My throat was hurting too now, my head was pounding and I was starting to feel cold. I was shaking too.

Somehow my brain registered that the area that hurt most was on my thigh. I then realized that if the main artery had been torn open by the wolf, then I was as good as dead. The only healer around who could have operated such an injury with a slight chance of saving the patient was me.

As I shivered endlessly I felt a fear like no other take hold of my heart. My mind escaped my control and panic made me thought of the worst. Had I lost so much blood already? Was I dying? I didn't want to die. Not like this. Not now. I couldn't feel my leg at this point and that did scare me quite a lot. And I felt cold. So cold. Why was it so cold? Hadn't it been summer? Why was it cold? Cold…

I didn't want to die. Not here.

Where was Nori? Was I dead already? Why was it cold? Why did it hurt? Was I dead?

I didn't…

Nori…

I wanted him to be here, to reassure me.

It seemed like nothing short of a miracle when I finally heard the voice whispering near my ear. I had no idea why I hadn't been able to hear him before. Still, I wanted him to be with me so much that the sound of his voice seemed to pull me out of my shocked state.

"Mizimul, don't give up. You'll be fine. You'll be safe. Don't leave us. Mizimul please…"

At that moment I realized my eyes were actually closed and my eyelids felt like lead coated them. I was experiencing something quite new. For a minute I was completely conscious, if still blind. The pain in my leg was far from forgotten, but I was suddenly able to register other things. I knew somehow that my head was resting on Nori's thighs and he was murmuring softly near my ear. I could now even feel his hand in my hair, caressing them slowly. When the murmurs stopped I started to worry that my ears didn't work anymore. Only when I heard another voice did I realize that Nori had simply stopped because someone was coming.

"She's shivering." I recognized Ori's voice though it was quite strangled.

"I know. She won't stop." Nori's voice was sounding much like Ori's. "She's still bleeding."

"Dori and Fili should soon arrive in the Halls right? Oin will arrive in time, won't he?"

Fili? What was Fili doing here?

"Tomorrow we'll start to move towards the halls."

Who was that? Was that the King? What was going on? What was he doing here? When did he arrive?

"How's her leg?"

I didn't hear the answer as I felt a wave of intense pain rush over my body as someone quite obviously decided it was a good idea to touch my wound. I tried to scream but only let out a pathetic whimper. There was so much pain. I was so tired. Suddenly I wanted nothing more than to simply fall asleep.

I just wanted to sleep. I wanted to sleep…

* * *

><p>I only realized I had been unconscious when I was brought back by a terrible pain that shot through my leg.<p>

I screamed.

Apparently I had found my voice back.

I tried to move, tried to pry those hands away from me. They were hurting me. They were hurting me! Why were they hurting me?

"Hold her! Keep her from moving for Mahal's sake!"

Someone was pressing something against my wound, rubbing it.

"Put this between her teeth, she might bite her tongue off."

I wanted to scream once more when I felt something being forcefully inserted in my mouth, between my teeth. Then there was a strange lull before I felt as if someone was tugging at my wound repeatedly and rather brutally too. As another wave of pain hit me I bit in the object, my back arching and my whole body tensing. What were they doing?!

I wanted them to stop!

Please could anyone make them stop…

* * *

><p>Blurs and deformed shapes came in view and left again.<p>

They came and went.

Repeatedly.

Thinking was difficult. Everything seemed to hurt. My limbs felt unresponsive.

I drifted in and out of consciousness, just like those shapes that moved around, hovered nearby.

* * *

><p>For the second time, a sharp pain really woke me up. But this time it felt as if I was completely alone. It wasn't the same pain I had felt earlier either, it was duller as if it were only remnant of something stronger that still ran through my nerves.<p>

There were no more hands holding my body down but truly there was no need for that anyway. I couldn't move, couldn't talk. I felt weaker than I ever had been and suddenly so alone that it made fear once more grow in my heart. There were no more blurry shapes either. Had I dreamt those?

Where were the others? Where was I? Why couldn't I move? Was I dead?

I whimpered.

Immediately I heard some noise, a loud clatter then hurried footsteps.

Then only did I feel it. A cool hand on my face.

I could have cried from relief. I wasn't alone, someone was here. Someone was here.

As my mind drifted off once more I thought I heard a whispered word…'Mizimul'.

This simple word heartened me more than anything else could.

* * *

><p>This time it was different.<p>

The pain was still there like a fire burning low but not raging anymore. Still nothing seemed to muddle my brain or hinder my movements. I was terribly exhausted but I forced my eyes to flutter open. I had expected a harsh light to hurt them but there was nothing of the sort. I was in some dark place.

I moved my head slightly, turning it on my right side. That simple move was tiring, but it was fine.

Only then did I realize where I was.

I was in my room, in Thorin's Halls.

And that darker shape that was currently half sitting on a chair, half lying on my bed while holding my hand was evidently Nori. His hair was a dead giveaway, even in the dim light. If he was here, if we were both here then it meant we were safe. The wolf hadn't hurt him. Just me.

I felt stupidly relieved at that thought before I chastised myself. I wasn't some stupid hero, I shouldn't be glad to be hurt. But well, if that meant that Nori was unhurt and safe then I might have the right to be relieved.

I felt a small tired smile tug the corners of my lips and I couldn't stop my hand from gently squeezing Nori's. Immediately he jumped up and his gaze found mine.

"Mizimul!" He breathed out before reaching for me.

For the first time since we knew each other he was the one who hid his face against my shoulder, his hair softly brushing against my neck and the side of my face.

I felt my heart leap in my ribcage but as I seemed unable to concentrate on several things at the moment, I chose to focus on Nori, not on how I was feeling.

"Don't you ever do anything that stupid again! Do you hear me? Never again Amelia." He blurted out, pain clear in his voice. "Can't you imagine how I felt when I saw…" His voice broke and he couldn't finish his sentence.

"I know…" I managed to croak.

Suddenly he was away from me and I was left for a second, wondering why he was gone. He was back just as quickly at my side, holding a cup that I hoped was filled with water.

"Here." He softly said, passing a hand in my back to help me sit up.

Pain shot through my leg and I winced, barely swallowing back a whimper. When I felt the cold metal against my lips though, I was happier than ever to be able to drink water.

"Do you want some more?"

"No…thanks."

Nori gently lowered me back on my bed and I sighed in relief once I lay again.

I looked at Nori, there were so many things I wanted to tell him at that moment. First I wanted to apologize; it was obvious I had scared quite a few people at least and that he was upset about having witnessed the events helplessly. Then I wanted to know what had happened exactly.

But at the moment, I was only tired and my eyes started to close against my will. Nori apparently realized that I was trying to fight against myself to stay awake. Gently he caressed my cheek and whispered while his other hand took hold of mine.

"Sleep now, you need to recover."

* * *

><p>The next time I woke up, Ori was the one sitting next to me. He was scribbling away on a piece of parchment and several rolls and other sheets simply covered the bed and the floor around him.<p>

I blinked. My mind was still a bit clouded by sleep but at least this time the pain in my leg was manageable.

"Ori?" I whispered.

"Amelia!" He almost fell from his chair when he jumped to his feet.

A huge smile immediately covered half his face as he grabbed my hand with his.

"Nori told us you had awoken and were conscious! I'm so happy you're alright!" His voice trembled a bit at the end and I smiled softly at him.

"Sorry."

"Wait, let me get you some infusion. Oin said you should drink plenty of this." He babbled away as he walked to the small table in my room and filled a cup he handed me. "Here. Oh. Wait. You can't sit up by yourself. Wait, I'll help you."

It was rather funny to see Ori fret around, but it only served to inform me that I had really scared them all. The fact that I was back in my room and had no memories whatsoever about the journey back was frightening to say the least.

As Ori helped me to drink the infusion Oin had made, I wished he would explain what had happened that night in the forest. I could remember the wolf and Nori being unable to defend himself. I could remember my fear and the pain too. But that aside I had no memory whatsoever until the moment I had woken up in this room with Nori sitting next to me. Had it been earlier that day?

"Ori," I rasped. "What happened?"

He shifted awkwardly and lowered me on my pillow.

"Well," He said first. "You scared us quite a lot. When we were hunting, Dori and I ended up meeting with Thorin, Fili and Kili who were out hunting for a few days. They were close by actually. We arrived in their camp and were starting to talk with them when we heard several shouts coming from our camp. We all rushed back to you and Nori only to see you fight against a huge black wolf. We had no time to do anything before you jumped between Nori and it. Nori couldn't throw his knife because you were too close. Thank Mahal Kili had his bow and arrow ready and he managed to kill the wolf in one shot. He's quick, it was an amazing shot."

Well at least that explained how I had survived my encounter with my first wild animal. I did feel slightly annoyed with myself though. Had my long hours spent training been so useless that I couldn't fight off a wolf? What had been the point on all this? I was suddenly certain that Dwalin and Gloin were thoroughly disappointed in me and it made me sad to think of it.

"When we saw it had hurt you, Dori and Fili immediately ran back towards the halls. I don't think they stopped. In the morning we made a stretcher and tried to get closer to the halls. We were lucky that Thorin and Nori knew a bit about healing. The two of them managed to keep you alive until two days later when we met with Oin on the way. It took us one more day to come back here."

It was somehow terrifying to learn that I had no memories of so many days. I swallowed thickly while Ori continued his retelling of our arrival here.

"As soon as we arrived, we brought you to the wards. But the next day Oin said there was nothing more for us to do but wait and so we brought you back here."

"When was that?" I asked in a small, uncertain voice.

"Six days ago. And you woke up in the middle of the night earlier yesterday. It's the afternoon now."

I nodded, already tired after being awake for just a short time.

"Infections?" I managed to ask, hoping Ori would understand what I meant.

"Thorin and Nori used your supplies to clean your wound, but you got very cold. You were pale and so, so cold Amelia, I thought…we all thought you were dead at one point." He shook his head, trying probably to shoo the memories away. "Oin said it was the loss of blood. He had to stitch your wounds, but yeah, you got a fever on the way back. It only broke two days ago. You were…delirious at some point too."

I winced. I could imagine all too well what they had felt. It was exactly what I felt when I thought about one of them being hurt. That reminded me…

"Nori?"

Ori arched an eyebrow before realization flashed through his eyes.

"He's alright. Your wounds made him forget his and he overdid it on the way back…but he's alright now. Oin had a look and he's healing nicely apparently."

"Where…Dori…Nori?"

"They're in the kitchen, oh! I should tell them you're awake!"

And just like that Ori stood and ran out of my room. Soon after I heard rushed footsteps and three figures I knew all too well barrelled in my room. In a second I was surrounded by them but instead of feeling crowded, I felt completely safe. I smiled at them, trying to reassure them about my health.

"Amelia…" The broken tone of Dori's voice brought tears in my eyes.

Suddenly I remembered what he had confided in me months ago. I remembered how their mother had died and a powerful feeling of guilt overcame me.

"I'm sorry." I sobbed, letting the tears run on my cheeks. "I'm so sorry. I couldn't run. I couldn't let…"

Nori's hold on my hand tightened but it wasn't painful. Dori sat near and was caressing my hair and brushing my tears away, softly murmuring me it was alright, that he understood. I cried in his arms while clutching tightly Nori's hand. Ori was gripping Nori's tunic, standing behind him and looking sadly at me.

I was more exhausted than ever once Dori had managed to calm me down, still, the three stubborn dwarves insisted that I ate something before letting me sleep. It was only when Nori reminded me of what I would do if any of them was lying there instead of me that I begrudgingly accepted to listen to them.

"Healers do make the worst patients." Nori said, teasingly though his smirk didn't quite shine in his grey eyes.

As Dori and Ori left to prepare me something to eat, I was left alone with Nori. He still held my hand and was looking at that when I decided to speak.

"I'm truly sorry Nori. I couldn't leave you behind. I can't. You can't ask me that."

He kept silent for awhile, frowning deeply, still staring at our hands when he softly answered.

"I know."

The door opened then and Nori turned to see who was arriving, blocking my view.

"I heard she awoke." Dís voice rose clearly.

"Hey Dís…" I said to let her know I was indeed awake.

She walked towards me, placing a hand on my forehead, checking my temperature, before she pressed two fingers on my neck and concentrated on my pulse. After a short time she sighed and her gaze found mine.

"Silly child. Can't you go out and come back without problems for once?"

"How's the wound?" I asked instead of answering her question.

She quirked an eyebrow and pointedly looked at Nori who seemed to understand and left the room.

"I'm going to check it now. Thankfully your breeches were made of rather thick leather. The wounds aren't deep enough to break bones or arteries but it tore the muscles. It was close Amelia. A little deeper and you would have bled out in minutes. It'll take time for you to walk properly again. You received a few scratches on your belly and right hip too. Lucky for you the wolf only managed to bite your tunic and not your flesh."

I paled a bit. Had I truly been that close to being chewed alive?

"That bad, uh?"

"I'm not sure whether you'll limp or not." She whispered while she moved the sheets and covers away from me.

I shivered, feeling suddenly cold. I wouldn't lie, Dís words affected me, or rather, the way she said it affected me. It was unlike her to whisper and sound almost…apologetic. It made me nervous.

"The claws dug in the muscle of your upper thigh. You'll have scars, three lines."

I truly didn't care much about that. It wasn't as if I was ever going to wear bikinis or nice lingerie in this world. I wasn't even sure anyone would see my body unclothed…wow that actually was a depressing thought.

"Danà will come a bit later. Tomorrow probably. The two of us will help you bath."

I blushed at that and Dís gently swatted my arm.

"Don't blush silly girl. We bathed you already several times, thank Mahal we could too. Wounds inflicted by animals tend to fester if they aren't properly cleaned. You were lucky you were close to the Halls."

Meanwhile she had removed the bandage that covered my thigh, making me realize that I was sleeping with a large shirt that probably belonged to one of the brothers, and that reached the middle of my thighs only.

"From what Ori said, I was lucky Kili was here." I whispered, trying to concentrate on something else than the sharp jab of pain I felt when Dís examined the wound.

"Aye. You were. Apparently he shot the wolf at the same time this beast tried to bit you." She answered simply before her sharp gaze locked with mine again. "Kili said he had never seen Nori so upset about anything."

At those words, my heart beat faltered before it sped up incomprehensibly.

"Well, I was almost chewed alive in front of him. I'm sure that would upset anyone half decent." I answered with a light shrug, hiding those weird feelings.

Dís observed me and nodded, though there was a small smirk on her lips that I didn't like much.

"I'll tell the brothers they can come and feed you some meat broth now. Then sleep. I don't want to see you out of this bed when I come back with Danà. Drink, eat and sleep for now."

Quickly she put some clean bandages around my wound and covered me properly before she left without another word.

* * *

><p>The following day when she came back in the afternoon, Danà was following her and quickly engulfed me in a tight hug.<p>

"Oh sweet child!" She exclaimed. "You scared us all so much!"

"I'm sorry Danà." I softly replied.

"Hush now. Let's get you to the bathroom." Dís intervened kindly though sternly.

"How will we get there?" I couldn't help but wonder.

"Don't worry, I'm sure we'll find a dwarf or two who will agree to carry you there." Danà smiled, amused at the horror in my eyes.

"I can't… I won't bath in front of …" I stammered, blushing terribly.

"Danà, help her put a long robe while I go see who's available." Dís said, ignoring my comments.

I was horrified to see her leave the room while Danà hurried to help me put on a robe that would cover my legs once I wore it.

"Danà surely you're both jok…" I chocked on my last word when I saw the door open on Nori.

My blush burnt my whole face now, and probably a good part of my body too. Apparently Nori's cheeks were slightly pink too as he awkwardly came closer to the bed. Danà seemed rather amused by my reaction; I could see it in the twinkle that shone in her eyes. I silently cursed her as Nori approached closer. He seemed as embarrassed as I was.

"Try and sit on the bed Amelia." Dís gently instructed but I saw a suspicious glint in her eyes. "It'll be better if there isn't any pressure on your wounded leg."

I slowly managed to manoeuvre myself with Danà's help so that I was sitting with my feet dangling on the bed's edge. Nori's cheeks were a bit redder when he bent to scoop me up in his arms. Automatically my left arm wounded around his neck while my right hand lay on my stomach. I was probably redder than a tomato now. Surely they didn't expect me to bath in front of Nori right? Right?

He slowly made his way to the door, obviously careful not to jolt me.

"Wasn't there anyone else?" I softly muttered. "You're still injured."

"I'm fine." He answered without looking at me.

When I glanced above his shoulder, my eyes narrowed as I saw Danà and Dís both whisper together hurriedly.

I wondered whether he had been the only one available to help when he opened the kitchen door and a terrible feeling set itself in my stomach. What was Dís playing at?

The room was just full of dwarves.

There was obviously Dori and Ori, standing by the stove and preparing some stew from what I could tell. And around the table I could see Bifur, Bofur, Gloin, Oin, Gimli, Fili, Kili, Bombur, Dwalin, the King, and finally Balin who stood up immediately at our entrance. Actually all the dwarves I knew or was familiar with were here. That was…disconcerting. And so embarrassing too.

"Amelia, my dear, how are you?" Balin asked worriedly.

"I'm fine. I …" I answered, cheeks still bright red from embarrassment before my eyes shifted to Kili. "Thanks, Kili for…well, saving me."

"Hush everyone, we should move quickly." Dís intervened before anyone else could speak. "She needs plenty of rest."

On those words she pushed Nori slightly to force him to move. The walk towards the bath seemed excruciatingly long this time. I couldn't believe Dís and Danà would actually plan for a man to see me naked and bath me. That just could happen right? And why did they chose Nori? Why did it matter?

My heart rate was erratic when we passed the doors that lead to the public bath. Immediately I realized that the heaters had been working recently but I truly didn't care as Nori followed Dís in one of the cabins.

No way.

This wasn't happening.

I didn't want Nori to see me naked in such conditions.

Erm…

I meant I didn't want him to see me naked. At all.

Nori was family. Nori was only family. I could probably repeat that endlessly…

I was torn away from those thoughts when he lowered me on a chair that was just near the large bath.

"Alright Nori, can you wait nearby? We'll need you to carry her back home."

"Sure" He answered in a strangely gruff voice before leaving without looking at me.

Suddenly I could breathe again. After I let a relieved sigh I met Dís and Danà's gazes.

They both sported small smirks that I could see even though their beards dissimulated them a bit and their eyes shone with something akin to mischief. I didn't understand them. I knew they had planned this, I knew they were observing me but honestly I couldn't fathom what had entered their heads. And if a small voice whispered 'liar' in the back of my mind, well I could just push it further away.

I did my best to ignore them and they suddenly acted as they normally did, motherly, sternly but kindly. I loved the both of them, even though their acts puzzled me sometimes.

"Come, let's get you in that tub. Unless you want us to call Nori back in." Danà cheekily said as she helped me out of my robe.

The blush that had dampened after Nori's departure came back with a vengeance and I spluttered unintelligible words while Dís poured some lavender oil and other dried plants in the bath water.

"I feel like I'm going to be cooked…" I muttered grimly.

"Aye, and the seasoning would be just perfect." Dís retorted as she removed carefully my bandage. "You can't stay in for long I'm afraid. It's already bad that you have no choice but to wet your wound."

"I know." I replied weakly.

All in all it was horribly awkward to be naked in front of the two older women, but they acted so nonplussed that in the end I was, if not comfortable, at least less nervous. It really was a quick dive in and I had needed them to actually carry me. I couldn't put any pressure on my injured leg and any move would tug the skin painfully.

The only, really agreeable moment happened once I was wearing a clean shirt and my robes once again. I sat in a chair and Danà washed my hair in a basin while Dís took proper care of my wound, putting back some ointment before bandaging it again. Everything felt peaceful and as Danà kindly took care of my hair, I slowly started to feel better.

"Your hair did grow quite a lot. You should ask Dori to redo your braid." Danà commented as she gently passed a wooden comb through my long and heavy locks.

"Do I have to ask Balin and Dori both?" I asked, slightly dozing off, lulled by the regular movement and the warm atmosphere.

"One of them only should be fine." Danà replied. "We could add a few more braids in your hair now if you wish." She then added.

"Aye, we should do that." Dís spoke at that moment. "What do you say Amelia? Do you want us to add some braids?"

I was really sleepy at the moment but I had the feeling this was important. Anything related to braiding was important.

"I don't mind, but what would it mean?" I managed to mumble, struggling to keep my eyes open.

"The braid itself doesn't mean much, it's the beads and who braids your hair that count." Danà explained.

"If you let Danà braid your hair that means you accept her as your kin, and she you. As for the beads, I thought we could add at least these three." As she spoke, Dís took three little clasps from one of her hidden pockets.

The first was a metallic one with runes ebbed on it. The second was made of a round deep red stone. And the last was a simple small metallic circle, made of a lighter metal than the first. Pointing at the last one, Dís explained.

"This one means you are accepted as a kin to a family. Usually it is the eldest woman of said family who will make the braid. If there's no woman, then it'd be the eldest man. This one is made of garnet, and it is only ever worn in braids by healers."

Her eyes bore into mine as she said those words and I felt tears pool in mine. I was about to retort something when Danà interrupted me.

"It doesn't mean you have to go back to the healing wards. It just means you have skills and a status among our kin. Besides, Amelia you can't lie to yourself, you're a healer at heart. Look what you did for Nori. Even when you said you wanted nothing to do with healing for a while you kept patching up Gimli, Fili and Kili after rough training sessions."

I had nothing to retort. I didn't feel like I should go back to the wards. Not yet. It was still too soon, the blood too fresh on my hands. But it was true. It seemed I couldn't help myself. Every time one of my friends was hurt, I just had to do something to ease their pain. Recently I had even started to help the other dwarves after training sessions, even though I knew them less.

My attention was brought back to the beads Dís still held in her palm as she pointed at the last one and sank her gaze in mine. Her voice was even and her eyes kind as she talked.

"This one means you have seen blood…in battle. It means you drew blood."

I heard the hidden meaning…it meant I killed, that I had killed a man.

"Danà would braid this one." Dís said pointing at the first bead. "As I am a healer, I am the only one, with Oin, allowed to braid garnet in your hair. And as I am of the ruling line of Durin, I can braid your first battle bead in your hair if you allow it."

I bit my lip, knowing this was an important decision I was making. Strangely it was actually an easy choice. A very easy one.

I simply nodded and couldn't have missed Dís' smile even if I wanted to.

The two women stood behind me and made quick work of gathering my hair and plaiting them.

"It would be so much easier if you had a beard." Danà sighed while smiling and pushing my chin up a bit.

I chuckled when she winked at me.

"If you had one, I would have braided two braids on each side that met in the middle. Oh, that would have been so cute."

When they had finished I gingerly moved my hand through the brown locks. Just above my guardians' braid I now wore Danà's.

The one with the garnet had been braided in the hair of my right temple, and I could feel the stone cold, yet somehow heart-warming, against my neck. The last one was in the long hair at the top of my head. When I felt the bead that reached the base of my neck, I realized that my hair was indeed longer than before. They reached the middle of my shoulder blades, at least.

I looked up at the two women and smiled.

Emotions raged within me but I managed to find my voice.

"Thanks" There really was nothing else to say.

Danà kindly caressed my chin and then bent to kiss me on top of my head.

"Hush, child. You're kin now, there's no need for such words between us." She softly said and I could only smile.

Soon after that, Dís went to call Nori back. Even though the both of us were once more blushing, he managed to wink at me and smile when he saw my new braids. He didn't lose time though and quickly gathered me in his arms. Unsurprisingly the walk back was more comfortable now that I didn't think I would be forced to bath naked in front of Nori.

He quickly strode back home, Dís and Danà a few steps behind us, and soon I found myself sitting in an armchair that had been brought from the living room to the kitchen.

I was tired, exhausted really, but I really wanted to stay awake a bit more if only to reassure my friends. But I was so tired that my eyes closed on their own volition. I listened absentmindedly to the dwarves' voices.

* * *

><p>I awoke in a startle.<p>

At first I thought that some noise must have scared me awake. But I immediately heard what was different.

The dwarves were all silent.

The room was full of dwarves and there was no noise. At all.

I blinked several times and looked around. Most of my friends were looking at their plates, as if they were trying to ignore what was happening around them. In such circumstances it was easy to spot the three dwarves who weren't avoiding the others' gazes.

The King was glaring at Nori. His eyes shone with cold, controlled fury. I shifted slightly to look at Dori, but the older dwarf was looking intently at his younger brother. One of Dori's hands held Nori's forearm tightly, and I understood he was trying to placate Nori. To silence him.

Then I looked at Nori.

His face was blank, as usual, but he was pale, so pale. His eyes though reflected perfectly the same tightly restrained fury that I had seen in the King's gaze. Instinctively I held my breath. Something was happening.

"Nori" The King growled. "I tolerated your escapades for a long time. I did it because you're my kin." His voice was cold and I shivered involuntarily. "But enough is enough."

As I heard those words I suddenly understood what was going on.

"I forbid you to take part in such dishonourable activities."

"You can't…" Nori started to protest coldly.

"I can. Next time I hear about you doing anything even remotely reprehensible…" The King snapped before he paused for a few seconds. "Next time, I will disown you. You will be banned from my Halls forever."

There was a collective intake of sharp breaths around the table. All eyes were now glued to Thorin. My eyes though went to Nori.

He looked torn. Broken. Betrayed.

"You…" Nori started but this time Dori interrupted him.

"You wouldn't!" He exclaimed, glaring angrily at his King.

"I would rather disown my own kin than have a scoundrel among my ranks, risking everyone's safety!" The King bellowed. "Look at yourself Nori! Look at what you've become! You can't even protect yourself and because of you, your brother's ward was hurt!"

Nori took a step back, as if he had actually received a physical blow. His face was a mask of horror and I immediately hated the King for his words.

"How dare you!" I shrieked without being able to restrain myself.

Every dwarf immediately stared at me. I didn't care. My heart bled. How could he use me against Nori? How could he dare?

"How dare you utter such words?! My injuries have nothing to do with Nori!"

"Really? Hadn't he been imprisoned like the common criminal he is, you wouldn't have been hurt." Thorin said in a nasty tone.

"Right. And hadn't you been such a cruel person, then you would have bailed him out immediately and I wouldn't have had to go to Lunetown. So if you think about it, it's your fault!"

"Amelia!" Several dwarves breathed out.

The King…no Thorin, he was no King to me. Not if he was using me against my family, against Nori. Thorin's fury was ebbed on all his features. I thought for a second he was going to jump at me and strangle me. Instead he slowly stood up. Coldly staring at me. His gaze flitted back to Nori.

"Because I knew your father and your mother well and respected them, I closed my eyes and let you become the scoundrel you are now. I gave you warnings, and several chances. Now it is over. If you ever take a step in the wrong direction, I will know. And you will be cast out. Forever. I won't have any of my kin dishonouring our line any longer."

Nori swayed slightly. His eyes were wide but he didn't say anything. He didn't try to defend himself. He didn't speak of the objects he was looking for. He just stayed there, staring at the King, at Thorin. For a second no one moved until Nori slowly lowered his head. He staggered back a bit and then swiftly disappeared in the shadows of the corridor leading to the rooms.

And then only the icy glare turned towards me and I felt my heart plummet in my stomach.

"As for you. If you ever speak to me in such a way again, you'll be out of these Halls sooner than you can realize."

I couldn't know whether it was the exhaustion due to my injuries, the pain at seeing Nori like this, the fear on Dori's and Ori's faces, or a mix of all those…but something broke in me.

Slowly, using sheer willpower and the little strength I had in my arms, I rose from my seat. I could feel my arms start to shake as I forced my body to stand, leaning heavily on the table but keeping my back as straight as I could. I ignored completely Dori's cry for me not to move or Dís' order not to use my injured leg.

I didn't care about all that at the moment.

Calmly, coldly, I asked.

"Do you wish for me to leave now, Your Highness?" I said coldly and his eyes narrowed at me. "Here I thought dwarves liked honesty, I was surely mistaken." I told him while staring right in his eyes, unafraid. "If you think I would stay idle and watch from the side as you hurt my family, you're in for a rude awakening My Lord." I spat those last words viciously.

At that point, I thought that it was a matter of minutes before he kicked me out. But honestly I didn't care. I was mad. That was certain now. I was completely mad.

But before the ire of the King could fall on me I shakily let go of my hold on the table and stubbornly took a step towards the corridor. I didn't want to stay here anymore. I would say something stupid. Well, something stupider than what I had already said.

"Amelia!" Dís and Danà shouted at once but I ignored them.

Just like I ignored Dori's plea for me to sit or Thorin's odd silence.

I gritted my teeth as I put all my weight on the injured leg. Pain shot immediately through my body but I would rather bit my tongue than let them see my pain. I took a first step.

"Amelia, stop this!" Dís ordered, standing up.

"Or what? You'll cast me out for being stubborn? Might as well send the entire population of this bloody mountain away!" I snapped.

Pain was really troubling my mind as I took a second staggering step.

Ori and Dori were beside me now and when my leg gave out under me, Dori swiftly caught me and gathered me in his arms. I was honestly relieved, but I tried my best not to show it, purposely turning my head away. Ori though, could see my tears and I just knew that his hard look wasn't meant for me. Thorin had managed a real feat; he had even angered Ori quite a lot.

"If you don't mind." Dori said coldly. "I would like to take care of the injured members of my family now. Please leave."

His politeness didn't dupe anyone. It was an order. Thorin glared at us and strode away. Quickly most of them were out. Balin, Oin, Danà, Dís and Bofur were still there though.

"Dori, one of us should examine her leg, she might have…" Dís started but Dori interrupted her.

"I take care of my family Dís. If something is amiss, I'll carry her to the wards. Now please leave."

Dís seemed to tense, clearly unused to being talked to like this. Still she sighed and nodded before leaving, Oin following her, glancing at me first. I tried to smile, but my attempt was pitiful, still the healer nodded and left quickly.

"I will talk to him." Balin softly said, breaking the silence of the room. "Some of his words were…unjustified. But Dori, be careful not to anger him more in the coming weeks. And…maybe keep an eye on Nori? I'm afraid he was serious and wouldn't hesitate."

Dori simply nodded and Balin came closer to pat my cheek kindly. I felt some of Dori's tension leave him then.

"And you my dear. You were quite the sight just then. But do try not to injure yourself further."

I offered him a small smile before he too left us alone with Bofur and Danà.

"I should go too. But Amelia, you were foolish. Do not anger Thorin further." Danà softly said, gently taking one of my hands and squeezing it.

Just as she left, Dori started to walk towards my room, Ori and Bofur in toe. Both dwarves had deep, angry frowns marring their faces in an unusual way. As Dori lowered me on my bed I couldn't help but hiss in pain.

"Don't complain." Dori said sharply. "You did it to yourself."

"I couldn't let him talk like this!" I retorted angrily.

"Lass, with Thorin it's often better to let him talk." Bofur commented with a sigh. "What a mess. Nori's going to be insufferable and Thorin will be a pain in the ass for days, if not weeks."

"If only…" Dori and I muttered at the same time.

We both exchanged a glance but either the other two hadn't heard or they chose not to comment.

A heavy silence fell in the room. None of us looked at the others. Somehow I had even forgotten the pain radiating from my leg.

"What is Nori going to do now?" Ori's voice broke the silence, voicing the question that was in all our minds.

What was going to happen now?

* * *

><p><strong>AN: First of all, and as usual :) Thanks to all the reviewers! It's nice to take the time to write a comment, especially as I know some of you have a lot to do with your studies/jobs. So thanks! **

**I know I haven't updated quickly this time, but well, I hope the size of this chapter will satisfy you all :) It took me an age to edit!**

**This one is quite dense, a lot is happening, but I didn't want to cut it earlier than after Thorin's announcement. (About that, I hope it was clear, I'm not too sure about the vocabulary I used, and how I used it) I know Ori could seem OOC, but I really wanted to show that even a soft-spoken person could lash out too.**

**Amelia's wound was unexpected, truly. I hadn't planned on having her injured, but the words just popped out and well...In the end I didn't want to delete that part. I really tried not to turn it into an over dramatic moment :P But I liked the idea of Amelia trying to protect an helpless Nori.**

**I hope some of you were happy with the (short) Amelia/Nori moments in this chapter :) And well, you all can start to guess who knows/suspects what exactly ^^**

**I'm quite busy right now, but I'll try to update during the week. I guess you can expect two updates next week. (I'll try my best to post them.)**

**Thanks a lot for your support!**


	33. Nori's Purpose

**Everything belongs to JRR Tolkien except for the plot and the OC**

* * *

><p>I was sitting on my bed, looking at the small candle on my bedside table, ignoring completely the three dwarves who were still there. All was silent. I didn't look at them, but I was sure my friends were all dumbfounded by the situation we found ourselves in.<p>

It seemed that Nori had been a thief for so long that it had somehow been accepted. Well, maybe not accepted, but it was just expected of him. His family and friends had learnt to deal with it. Nori was a thief. There was nothing to do about it. Nori had been a thief for decades, and he would still be one for decades to come. That was what everyone thought.

But what now?

If I was fair, I would admit that I could understand Thorin.

It was true that Nori was a dwarf, and dwarves were apparently generally disliked by men; I had seen various example of this hate. Personally I thought men were stupid, but even like this, I knew I was prejudiced against them. Objectively it was probably bad for trades and diplomacy to have a dwarf being imprisoned for thievery in men's town. I could understand that the need of the many superseded the need of the one. That was logical. Nori's actions could bring troubles to the whole community. Because of him, men could point a bad example. They could say, 'see that dwarf, he's a thief, they all are.' It wouldn't be true. But it would probably be said and that was harmful enough for the dwarves' relations with men.

Yes, objectively Thorin wasn't entirely wrong.

But I wasn't objective.

How could I be when it concerned Nori?

"Well, Thorin might be harsh, but he's our leader. He's a good leader too. He saved us." Bofur sighed sounding tired.

"I know that." Ori muttered. "Everyone knows that."

"He's right too. Nori is endangering everyone." Dori muttered, though it was obvious it hurt him to admit it.

"What are you going to do?" Bofur then asked.

I looked up, assuming he was talking to Dori. Maybe he was, but he was looking at me at that moment, which unnerved me.

"I don't think there's much I can do. Nori will have to stay here for a while. Maybe when Thorin is calmed he'll allow him to go out with me for trades." Dori sighed, rubbing his hand on his forehead.

"What do you mean?" I frowned.

The three of them were now looking at me questioningly. His words had been quite clear, but a detail puzzled me. I frowned and tilted my head a bit.

"You just said, he will allow him to go out. What do you mean?" I repeated my question.

I saw Bofur's eyes widened a bit and he seemed to understand something. As Dori was about to answer, the artisan cut in and explained the situation.

"You were asleep lass. Thorin first told Nori that he was not allowed to leave the Halls anymore."

"What?" I breathed out.

"Many things can be said about Nori, but he never stole from dwarves. Thorin knows it." Dori softly explained. "By ordering him to stay within the Halls, Thorin ensures Nori will stop his…activities."

"He's imprisoning him!" I snapped.

That couldn't be right. They couldn't let Thorin do this. Nori would become mad if he was obliged to stay here. Even I knew that. Nori enjoyed his freedom. He liked to go away even if for a few days. I knew it and I hadn't been here long.

"No, he's free to go where he wants, as long as it is inside the Halls." Dori's voice clearly showed he didn't believe any of it.

A sharp pain in my palms made me realize I was clenching my fists too tightly. Ignoring it I let my anger flare.

"How can he?! You know perfectly well that he's all but caging him. He might as well put him a collar and chains too!" My voice rose as I spoke.

"Amelia!" Dori snapped. "You know it's not like that."

"And you know that's exactly how Nori would feel!" I retorted harshly.

They all seemed to recoil a bit at that. Then there was a short silence before Bofur spoke forlornly.

"She's right Dori. Nori won't be able to stay put for months. Not without something to focus on. He couldn't do it as a child, I remember how he would always seemed to be running somewhere. He won't be able to do it now."

Once more there was an awkward silence. I pushed the thought of a tiny Nori running everywhere out of my mind. I really had something else I should focus on right now. I had to find a way to help Nori. Surely Thorin couldn't be serious?

Even I didn't believe it. It had been fairly obvious that he had been serious.

"But we're here for him…right?" Ori finally spoke in a small, almost scared voice.

His words though almost broke my heart. What could we do for Nori? I knew no one would speak against the King. He was after all a King and it was well within his right to order his subjects around. From what I could tell, Nori had indeed been lucky all this time. Being a distant kin had allowed him more liberties.

Now was the time to pay the price.

"Of course we'll be here." Dori softly murmured and I knew he didn't believe for a second that it would help anything.

After those few words though, the three of them left the room. Well, not before Dori took the time to ask me about my leg and I promised him I would check the bandage myself.

As the door closed behind him I couldn't help but feel slightly desperate. All the happiness I had felt earlier at being given important beads had disappeared. How could I stay happy when Nori was suffering so much? Remembering the look on his face when Thorin had threatened him was tearing my heart in two. He had looked so lost, so hurt, so betrayed. I had never seen his face quite so expressive and it was terrible to know it was expressing only pain.

A cold feeling on my hand made me lower my gaze.

I looked at the round drop on the back of my right hand. It was soon joined by a second one that fell just next to the first.

Gingerly I raised my hands to my cheeks and I realized I was crying. It made me blink, freeing several tears at the same time. Was it really so surprising that I would hurt so much? Nori was so close to me, so important. I couldn't bear it. I couldn't let him suffer alone.

I wanted to be there for him. I wanted it so much…

I angrily wiped the tears away. Grinding my teeth I decided that being stupid now wasn't important. Nori was the only thing that truly mattered.

I slowly and painfully managed to stand, helping myself by clutching my bedside table. It was both embarrassing and frightening to realize I needed to take some time to find my breath again as soon as I was up. The pain in my leg was flaring and it took all my concentration to stop myself from whimpering. I didn't think I would be able to take a step. It hurt too much and I knew that putting too much pressure on my leg wouldn't be good for the healing process.

After I took several deep inhales, I calmed down my racing heart and tried to control the pain at least a bit. The mind had a power of its own. I had heard about it several times, now was the perfect moment to try and prove it. Bracing myself for the fresh pain I was going to bring upon myself, I decided to try another technique. Hopping on one foot I somehow ended up crashing painfully against the stone wall near my door. Once there it took me several long minutes before I felt I could try and go in the corridor.

I grinded my teeth against the terrible pain that radiated from my leg. I had never hurt quite so much before.

Beads of sweat already covered my forehead. I didn't care. The pain was inconsequential. The difficulty didn't mean anything. As I opened my door slowly I felt I could do it. It was going to hurt. But right now I was worried. I needed to make sure Nori was alright. I needed to see him. I wanted to be here for him as he had so often been there for me. It was only natural.

I would do it for anyone in my family. Right?

Yes, anyone would do it for a family member. I had to believe in that.

I was panting as I leant heavily against the wall.

Had this stupid corridor ever been so long?

I had to stop in my progress thrice before I finally arrived in front of Nori's door. I had to be silent otherwise I would wake Dori and Ori and I didn't want that. I didn't think Nori would want the three of us to barge in his room and force him to talk. Besides, I needed to talk with Nori about things neither of the brothers knew. Gasping for air I managed not to crash into his door, I only leant heavily on it. After I took some time to breathe a bit, I knocked lightly on the wooden door.

No one answered and for a few seconds I feared Nori was gone.

What would I do if he had decided to run away? What would I do? What could I do?

I knocked once more, still lightly. But this time I added a whispered 'Nori.' I could feel my chest constrict painfully as my fear grew. Could he really leave like that? I bit my lower lip and used the door to stay upright. My left leg wasn't hurt, but the muscles were burning from the effort I had made and I could feel that I was starting to shake lightly.

I forgot completely about it in a second though. A heavy weight lifted from my shoulders as I heard some noise from inside the room. Relieved and tired, I rested my head on the wooden door and closed my eyes for a moment.

At that instant I didn't really realize it wasn't such a good idea.

I heard the soft clicking sound of the lock being opened and only had the time to open my eyes before the door opened too and I fell right in Nori's unsuspecting arms.

I bit back a cry as Nori thankfully managed to stop my fall. I crashed against his hard chest and the shock forced the air out of my lungs. The sudden jolt changed the dull pain from my right leg into a sharp burning one though and I had to bite my lip strongly in order not to whimper. I started to tremble slightly in Nori's arms and I felt them tighten around me.

"Amelia! By Mahal what are you doing here?" Nori whispered, quickly carrying me to his bed.

I whined a bit when he lowered me on the sheets and saw how worried he was. Quickly he helped me sit but seemed to hesitate when it came to actually touch my wound. I was only wearing my robe above the long shirt, so it wouldn't be difficult to check it, but right now I didn't want to think about that. I was here for Nori only. As I was trying to ignore the pain and almost convinced myself it didn't hurt so much, Nori strode to close back his door.

"What are you doing here?" He whispered again.

I had expected him to be angry at my appearance on his doorstep. He didn't sound annoyed at all though. I looked at him, focusing solely on him. Pain was forgotten just like this.

Nori seemed tired. His whole demeanour showed how defeated he probably felt. Never had I seen him like this. In his usually expressive eyes I only distinguished exhaustion. Thorin had broken something. Since the day I had found out about what Nori did, I had known it was important to him for reasons unknown. Only now did I realize how important it had actually been.

"Nori" I breathed out brokenly.

Somehow I found my arms were now extended towards him. The look of pain and despair on Nori's face almost made me cry again. He hesitated. I saw it. I saw how he first leant slightly forward before he recoiled. Then slowly, like a wounded animal, he made a step towards me. Then another. He was almost close enough now. I could almost touch him.

I saw him raise his hand. Focused on him, I held my breath.

He was shacking.

When he gently caught my hand in his, I felt a shiver ran down my spine. A light tingle, that ran from my fingertips all along my arm and made my breath itch for a second.

Looking at him I saw only how lost he was. I felt a lump in my throat when I noticed the sadness in his eyes. I wished at that moment that there was something I could do for him. Except showing some support though, I had no idea what I could possibly do. Not caring about consequences, I tugged on his hand lightly.

My heart skipped several beats when he didn't resist the pull and stepped closer.

"Mizimul" He gasped as he sat on the bed next to me.

In all but a second he was in my arms.

I swallowed thickly and gathered him closer to me. I held him close. His head rested on my shoulder and I embraced him tightly, bringing him closer to me. His arms encircled my waist and he strengthened his grip on me. I could feel how one of his hands was grasping my robe. It was unusual for him to hold me quite so tightly. It was only highlighting how much he needed someone right now. Gently, carefully, I brought one of my hands at the back of his head and caressed his hair slowly. My left hand was clutching at the back of his tunic, ensuring he stayed close. I let my head fall against his. I couldn't help but smile softly at the impracticality of his hairdo.

I had no idea for how long we remained like this.

At some point he had started to tremble against me. It had taken all my willpower not to cry in pain. I was hurt to see him like this. But my pain was nothing compared to his.

After a while he slowly shifted and I knew he was about to move away. Regretfully I let him go, though I was happy to see he stayed rather close. I tried to shift my weight and winced when my leg painfully asked for attention.

Immediately his expression turned to worry as he observed me with sharp, knowing eyes.

"Why did you do this to yourself?" He softly chastised.

"Because I couldn't leave you alone." I said without hesitation, it was the truth.

"You shouldn't bother with me Amelia. I'm nothing but a thief." He murmured before shaking his head lightly. "Actually, I'm not even that anymore…"

"It has never been a bother Nori." I replied softly.

He remained silent for long minutes before he muttered in a strangled voice.

"I'm not worth it. I'm not worth your concern Amelia, I…"

I couldn't let him say such things.

My heart was beating wildly at hearing such awful and stupid words. I felt a turmoil of emotions inside me, I was angry at Thorin and the others, I was hurt, I was sad and I was scared. But Nori's words tore my heart. I took them somehow personally; I had no idea why, but I just couldn't let him believe, or even say, such things.

"You are. You are worth so much, you just don't see it." I was a bit ashamed of the choked sound that came out of my mouth.

Still, I meant every word.

He froze at hearing them, staring at nothing and clearly refusing to look at me.

I slowly raised my hand to his cheek. He tensed when my fingertips brushed his cheekbone. He wasn't looking at me as I lightly grazed his skin. He didn't move. Didn't say anything. I even wondered whether he was breathing or not. I lightly forced him to turn his head but his eyes remained locked away from mine. My thumb lightly grazed his cheek once more as I observed his reactions intently.

I was in a daze.

When my hand skimmed over his beard though, brushing his braids, he shivered. In a second his hand caught mine.

"You shouldn't do that."

I stared at him, slightly startled. He glimpsed at me, his eyes veiled and his face blank. He saw obviously I didn't understand what he meant because he elaborated after clearing his throat.

"You shouldn't touch a man's braids. Not like this."

"Why?" I frowned.

"It's…not proper." He muttered, looking away again.

I blushed and averted my eyes. I didn't know for sure what it meant, but I would probably have to ask someone else. For now I glimpsed at Nori and saw his cheeks were slightly red. It made me smile a bit. How come we always ended up in weird situations? I was about to tease him when I saw that his gaze was actually not staring into nothingness. No. they were actually riveted on the table near his bed. I looked at what was captivating him.

There was a dark linen sheet spread on the table. On it I could distinguish several things, objects of various size and shape. My eyes were immediately caught by the swords. There were two of them. One was broken, its blade only half as long as what I supposed it had been. The handle was made of a once shiny metal and engraved with runes. The second one's was almost identical except that its blade was only severely indented but still in one piece. I glanced at Nori. He hadn't moved.

I realized he still held my hand in his and I squeezed his fingers lightly. He did the same but his eyes didn't leave the items on the table.

From here and in the dim light, I could still see several other things. Two, no, three beads. Large ones made of metal. A large, dwarvish ring entirely made of shining gold as well as several other smaller objects I couldn't quite identify.

"Nori?"

I was looking at him now.

My breath caught when I saw tears in his eyes.

I immediately reached for him. Forgetting the pain in my leg, I leant and embraced him tightly. His arms automatically reacted it seemed and he held me once more. It was so easy to see he was really upset. Gently I rubbed his back and whispered soothing words in his ear. When I tried to move and get more comfortable, Nori realized immediately my leg was hurting me. He frowned and was about to say something when I stopped him, raising one of my hands in front of him.

Still, that stupid leg hurt. I tried to find another position. In the end I reclined against Nori's pillow. I couldn't help but sigh in relief almost immediately as I was half lying, half sitting. Slowly, Nori shifted away only to help me lie down on his bed. He cautiously helped me bring my legs on the mattress and even placed a blanket on me. I was afraid he would leave then but, to my surprise, he sat down and scooped until his back was against the wall. I suddenly remembered that night so long ago when he had been the one consoling and soothing me. It seemed ages ago. And now he was the one who needed me.

As he glanced toward me I gestured for him to come next to me. He quite obviously hesitated before he laid and seemed frozen for a moment. He didn't move when I shifted to find a comfortable position.

That ended up being on my left side and resting my head on his chest while embracing him tightly. As soon as I stopped moving I felt him relax slowly. He always seemed tense nowadays when I was close. He clearly hesitated yet again, his hands hovering inches above my skin. Annoyed by his behaviour, I grabbed his right hand and simply forced him to embrace me.

We stayed immobile and silent for long minutes.

Strangely, it didn't feel awkward at all.

Actually, if it weren't for the reason of my presence here, I would dare say it was rather comfortable.

It took some time, but after a while spent like this, Nori finally completely relaxed. I felt and heard him sigh deeply and craned my neck to look at him.

"How do you feel?" I murmured.

It might sound like a silly question, but in a way, I just had to ask. He pondered a minute before answering.

"I'm…not sure." He stopped and frowned a bit.

I thought he wouldn't say more. Resting my head once again on his chest I listened to his quick heart beat. Absentmindedly I started to trace patterns on his arm with my fingertips. In answer he squeezed my waist a bit.

I had all but forgotten my injury.

I looked up a bit when I heard Nori clear his throat lightly.

"You know about my father?" He asked before adding. "How he died I mean?"

Not wishing to disturb him as he obviously felt like talking, I simply nodded. I knew he would feel it anyway.

"We never found his body. We never knew for sure what happened."

My grip tightened on his tunic and I felt extremely sad for the three brothers.

"Our Ma, after awhile, well when I was old enough to care for Ori, she started to leave our home. She was going in the wilderness. Dori and I knew it was to look for Da. She never…accepted his death."

I couldn't stop tears from welling in my eyes. What a terrible fate, not knowing what had happened to your loved ones, and being left behind. I could somehow relate to that, though the details were clearly different. The story of their mother was truly pulling at my heartstrings.

"One evening, Dori was out, working, and Ori was already asleep. She came back and I saw her gripping that sword, the broken one. It belonged to our father. I recognized it immediately, I used to sneak out and play with it." His voice shook a bit as he talked and I could only caress his arm in what I hoped to be a soothing manner.

"It was a set of two swords. Ma didn't see me, but at that moment I knew that she was looking for our father. Several years later, after she came back hurt, I talked to her about it. She told me then. She was looking for father, but she knew he was dead. There wouldn't be any body to find I told her, but she said she wasn't looking for that."

I held my breath and stilled. Nori's voice was barely above a whisper as he recalled the night that had probably changed his life completely.

"She'd spent years looking for my father's necklace. The chain was made of silver, but she didn't care for that. She wanted the necklace because stringed on the chain were five beads. Beads of gold and silver, with runes engraved on it. Our family's beads. One for each, she said. Hers and father's were meant to be given. Father's to Dori as head of our family. Mother's to the first woman who would marry in our family."

I was completely frozen. Was he saying what I thought he was? Had he become a thief only to find those back?

"That day I swore to find those beads back. Dori and Ori would get two of them, and I one."

He stopped talking for a while. My mind was bubbling with too many thoughts. Five beads. All of this for five beads? It seemed somewhat really odd, and yet it was somehow fitting for this world's strange morals and ethics. For so long he had tried to find them and for what results? I could understand though why he wanted them back so badly. They belonged to their family. His mother had died trying to find them. And he had become a thief…

"Why?" I asked, wondering why he had chosen to become a thief instead of looking for them while being a regular mercenary. Surely the dwarves would have understood that.

Nori misunderstood the meaning behind my question though.

"It is only natural for Dori to get father's bead. And, well…for mother's…" He seemed to hesitate a bit. "A thief isn't exactly someone a respectable woman would marry. Well, any woman really." I felt him tense once more against me.

I blinked. Then I suddenly remembered Danà telling me Nori had sworn never to get married. He had been a child then, but apparently his career hadn't really made him change his mind. Well, that explained certain things, though I thought it was perfectly stupid. Still I had too many questions left and I didn't want to focus on that topic. I knew it wasn't really what was bothering Nori right now.

"I meant, why did you become a thief?" I whispered against his chest.

He relaxed a bit again before answering with a low and clearly sad voice.

"It was obvious my father's body had been robbed from all precious things. Thieves don't talk to anyone else but other thieves. If I wanted a chance to find back what once belonged to us, I had to enter certain…circles."

It made sense.

It made sense but it hurt me all the more. He had dedicated his whole life to finding lost family belongings only to be looked down by his own kin. He was despised and distrusted by most dwarves and now even Thorin was letting him down. This whole mess had hurt way too many people.

His deep rumbling voice tore me from my thoughts as he talked again.

"Over the years I managed to find back all the people who participated in the raid against his caravan. I found his other sword and one of his daggers. I found several beads, earrings, and the ring he wore as head of the merchant's guild."

"And you heard nothing about the necklace?" I asked, incapable of stopping the words from coming out.

"Around twenty years ago, maybe a bit more, I found the last participant of the raid. He had been a real young lad back then, barely old enough to wield a sword I'm guessing. And that was partly why I had troubles finding him, the boy had simply disappeared. I only found him because I had heard that an old hermit had been spotted once or twice with a dwarvish looking necklace." He sighed deeply before he continued to recall the events. "I expected to meet a lonely older man."

I held my breath, waiting for Nori to tell me what had happened when he had met the man. Why didn't he have the necklace now if he had found the original thief?

"He was old alright when I found the place he lived in. Old and dead actually. He'd been killed months maybe even a year before I arrived. I only saw a decaying cadaver and there was no sign of the necklace." Nori's voice sounded bitter, as if he still felt the disappointment as strongly as he did at that time.

I didn't realize I was now clutching tightly Nori's tunic. I felt a sharp jab of pain in my heart at the thought of the missed opportunity. The thief had been robbed. Ironic and so classic. I couldn't even start to fathom how Nori probably felt at that time. I was certain that having all your hopes crushed in such a way was one of the most painful things to experience.

"Since then I've been trying to find the man who killed him. I heard several rumours these past years about dwarvish jewellery being seen here and there, but I never found anything concrete." He sighed again and I felt him shiver a bit before he managed to control himself. "And now…now I'm forced to stay here and won't have a chance to find them before long and it'd be too late, again."

His voice broke and I could only tighten my grip on him, letting him know I was there for him.

I was completely crushed against him but I didn't mind.

I had always felt safe in his arms and I could only hope I was able to comfort him a bit at least. I wished I could help him feel at least a bit better. I only wanted to help right now. He deserved as much.

"Why did you not talk about it with Dori? With Thorin? Surely they would understand." I tried to find some solutions.

It was just too cruel to force Nori to stay here after he spent more than half his life looking for his family's belongings. Surely Dori and Thorin would understand that. I was certain Dori would want the necklace back too. And Thorin probably was among those people who understood best the will to recover something that had been unfairly taken from you. Why had Nori never said anything?

"I don't want Dori to know." Nori muttered stubbornly.

"Why?" I was truly a bit shocked.

"Because that idiot would want to help." Nori said grimly.

Alright, honestly I failed to see the problem here. If Dori helped, surely they would have better and hopefully quicker results. Didn't people usually say that there was strength in numbers?

"And that's a bad thing because?" I couldn't help but sound a bit sarcastic, but Nori apparently didn't mind that much.

"Because Dori would be incapable of doing anything dishonourable, in the end he would end up being in danger. He doesn't know how to deal with some people. He never did. He's too straightforward, too honourable." Nori replied, sighing.

Fair enough. It was true I couldn't picture Dori playing sneaky mind games. It wasn't because he was stupid, not at all. It was just as Nori had put it. He was too honourable. Some people could be sneaky, some couldn't, end of the story. In the end, Nori was just trying to protect his brothers in his own, odd and sly way.

"And Thorin isn't any better." Nori added darkly. "He's a good leader, but he's even worse than Dori when it comes to honour."

Well, that was right too. Our King really didn't seem like the kind of persons who would accept to act like Nori had.

"They wouldn't want to act the way I had to. It's the only way though. Thieves won't talk about some things, unless it's to another thief." Nori whispered, as if he was revealing some huge secret.

Maybe he was.

Frowning and thinking back about the recent events I wondered then what our local thief had been doing in that men's town. Was he looking for information? Could he get them before he was thrown in prison?

"Did you find anything in Lunetown? Why were you there?" I breathed out without looking at him.

"I didn't lie to Ori you know. I didn't plan to steal anything there." He murmured so softly that I barely heard him.

I had guessed as much. I frowned though. How did he end up in jail if he hadn't stolen anything? If he had only been there to meet with someone and find some information, then why was he in prison?

"Why did you…" I started to ask before I gasped.

An idea had just crossed my mind. It was a stupid idea. So stupid actually… but no. Surely he didn't mean that…he couldn't mean that.

I arched my back, putting all my weight on my left arm to look at him straight in the eyes. I ignored the stab of pain that shot through my leg at the sudden move. This was too important.

"Are you telling me you let yourself be caught and thrown in there on purpose?" I hissed lowly.

As I saw him avert his eyes from mine I glared at him. He was at least looking a bit sheepish but it really wasn't enough. This idiot, this stubborn and stupid dwarf had been caged in that hellhole for weeks. And he had done it on purpose!

"I needed to talk to one of the prisoners but that's not as if I could visit him there!" He retorted.

At that moment I slapped him. Hard. On the chest.

Tears blurred my eyes and I could honestly say that I hated him, or at least his behaviour and careless attitude towards his own safety. How could someone be so stupid? He could have died there. His wounds could have been seriously infected. Didn't his mother's death teach him anything? How could he? How?!

"You idiot! You bloody dunderhead!" I said while punctuating each word with another hit.

"Amelia!" He huffed but I ignored him.

"Do you know how worried I was? Do you know how painful it was to see you in there?" I was so angry at him.

To think about all the suffering he went through just to get information.

"Amelia!" He tried to stop me from hitting him, but I managed to slap him once more on the chest.

"Don't you care about how we feel? Ori was devastated!" I was devastated too, didn't he see that?

"Mizimul!" He finally hissed and caught my wrist.

I looked at him and realized I was crying.

"Nori, why don't you take better care of yourself?" I was pathetic but I didn't care.

My heart was throbbing with the pain I felt. Why was he so despised when all I could see was how great he was? Why didn't the other see how much he cared? Why didn't they see how kind he was and how hurt too?

I could see it.

I could and I had been here a bit more than a year only.

"Mizimul…" He whispered brokenly before bringing me once more flat against his chest.

I let him do it, too glad to lie once more. After that though I shivered and cried, hiding my face in his tunic as he whispered in my hair.

"I'm sorry. I had no choices. I had to, Mizimul, I had to."

"It doesn't make it hurt less, you idiot!" I retorted between sobs.

He caressed my hair, whispering apologizing words all along until I stopped crying. Around that time, the light of the lone candle faltered and suddenly we were plunged in darkness. I tightened my hold on him and Nori's grip strengthened too.

The darkness, or maybe simply Nori's presence were soothing enough. I calmed down and snuggled closer to him. He let me. Actually he brought me closer still. My head was resting on top of his chest, and I could feel his braided beard grazing me slightly. I was rather certain that this wasn't proper in the least, but I would deal with the consequences later. Right now I wanted to stay with Nori.

I wanted it…

…and I hoped that maybe, he wanted it too.

I could feel his heart beat strongly under my palm. It was soothing, reassuring. Somehow I realized at that moment how muscled he was. Under all the layers of tunics, leather coats, fur coat and so on… it was usually difficult to distinguish the body shapes with precision. But right now, Nori was only wearing one shirt and it was easy to feel the muscles under the fabric. Oddly, at that moment, I remembered the day I had visited the forges. I had seen several dwarves without tunics on. I could remember that the sight of Fili and Kili had been quite…interesting. I wondered how Nori would look then…well without the bruises and bloody gashes I had seen every time he wasn't wearing a tunic in front of me.

Suddenly I had the utter certainty that Fili and Kili were just kids and that Nori would be much, much more appealing to see.

I actually couldn't help but smile a bit at the thought of seeing Nori like that…

And then I swallowed back a surprised yelp.

My cheeks started to burn in embarrassment.

When, how, where…where had that come from? Why did I … Oh god what was wrong with me? Nori was family! I couldn't think of him like that, even though objectively he would be obviously more attractive than…

Aaaah!

I shifted awkwardly and evidently, Nori felt it.

"Are you alright? Does your leg hurt?"

I suddenly felt nervous and had to clear my throat several times before I could actually talk. This was so awkward. I felt so stupid.

"I'm fine. It's just…" I couldn't finish that sentence. Never.

"Just what?" Nori insisted gently.

"Erm…it does hurt a bit." It sounded more like a question and I hoped Nori wouldn't notice.

The feeling of his hand against my skin just made me blush harder as he placed his fingers against my forehead and cheeks. I couldn't be more thankful for the darkness, at least the redness of my cheeks wouldn't be seen.

"You seem feverish." Nori whispered worriedly and started to shift, probably to stand up.

"I'm fine." I stopped him, I really didn't want him to light a candle right now. "I'm fine really just, erm, a bit tired."

Actually now that I let myself realize it, I was exhausted. Being with Nori had allowed me to forget about pain and tiredness. I could only shove them away from my mind for so long though. I sighed as I snuggled once more closer to Nori, he had moved away a bit after he shifted.

"I should carry you back to your room." Nori murmured but didn't move.

If anything he held me a bit tighter against his chest. I huddled up closer and tried to find a comfortable position for my leg.

"Don't…" I whispered back softly, the sound muffled by his tunic.

My head and right hand were resting on his chest, close to his heart. I let my eyes flutter close and sighed lightly. Nori's hand found mine and held it against his chest. I hadn't known until then that the nerves of my hands could have effects on my whole body. Instinctively my grip on his hand tightened a bit. I wasn't nervous anymore.

I was with Nori, in his arms.

How could I possibly be nervous then?

Consequences could be damned…there was no way I would leave him alone tonight.

As I slowly drifted into sleep I wondered whether it was normal for me to feel that way when I was with a family member.

* * *

><p>I wasn't awake.<p>

No I was in this strange state where your brain starts to awake but the bed is just way to comfy to wake up and leave it yet. That perfect moment where everything felt so amazing.

And right then, I felt wonderful.

My leg wasn't hurting and the bed truly was warm and comfortable.

That is, until it started to shift and move a bit.

I frowned, still half asleep.

Now was way too early to wake up. I was so comfortable!

Quickly I tightened my hold on the moving piece of furniture and snuggled closer to it, sighing contentedly.

It was so warm. I rubbed my face a bit on it, smiling.

It had stopped moving altogether. I was glad. My hands shifted a bit and I embraced closely the source of warmth.

As I was starting to doze off again, it moved again.

I moaned loudly this time. Annoyed, I managed to bring my injured leg completely atop of the moving thing. Hooking my foot under it and snuggling closer still.

There.

It didn't move anymore.

I let out a happy, content moan as I rubbed my cheek against it once again.

It felt so wonderful.

"Oh Mahal…" I heard someone whisper almost painfully.

I knew that voice. That was Nori's. Why was Nori sounding so…strangled? I frowned and reluctantly let my brain start to think about something else than the warmth I was sleeping against.

I remembered Nori had been upset the previous night, and rightly so. I remembered I had come to see him. I remembered … I had stayed with him.

My eyes opened in a flash.

Oh dear. Oh dear. Oh dear.

I squeaked, alerting Nori that I was awake too. We both froze. Well, he froze, I couldn't move anyway. I didn't need any more help to realize I was sleeping almost entirely on top of Nori in a most inappropriate position. Still, now I was awake and aware of my surrounding. So I was aware that I really was using him as a mattress and that the robes I wore weren't covering much of anything anymore. I was also rudely made aware of the pain throbbing in my leg and I couldn't move it.

"Amelia…"

"Nori I…"

We both spoke and stopped at the same time. Nori sounded incredibly ill at ease. I was certain that my skin would be permanently red from now on as I had no choice but to ask for his help.

"I can't move my leg, it hurts." I whispered while trying to slide away from him.

Immediately Nori gingerly took the painful limb. I bit my lip when I felt his hand touch the bare skin of my thigh. My skin tingled furiously as I considered how inappropriate that was. After some shifting and sliding, we were both looking at each other. I was reassured somehow to see Nori as embarrassed as I was. I didn't think I had ever seen so much red on his cheeks.

"I'm sorry." I said. "I didn't mean to…that is, erm, I didn't plan on…well you know…strangle you in your sleep." I finished lamely after much stammering.

Nori didn't say a word as he stood up quickly and immediately started to tidy up the table were his father's belongings were. I felt as if he was ignoring me.

"Nori?"

He didn't answer but swiftly took the objects and threw them in a large trunk. There was no doubt in my mind that as soon as I would be away, he would hide them properly. Right now though, it bothered me that he wouldn't speak to me at all. I understood the situation wasn't really ideal, but even if it wasn't proper, no one had seen us. I struggled to sit and slide my legs on the side of the bed, my feet dangling near the stone floor.

"Nori!" I finally snapped, the pain burning in my leg was making me rather cranky.

"Amelia, there's no time. Dori and Ori will soon be awake, if they aren't already. I have to carry you back to your bed now. If they find you here…" He snapped right back, turning to look at me before blushing furiously once more. "Mahal Amelia! Cover yourself!" He hissed.

At that he turned his back to me in a quick move. Glancing down I saw that when I had tried to move, my robes had come undone once again and were now completely open on my large and thin shirt. My legs and one shoulder were on display and I couldn't help but roll my eyes. Though I did blush quite a lot too…

"What then?" I asked to change topics back to what they were a minute ago.

Nori didn't answer and I insisted.

"Nori, what would supposedly happen?"

"You really don't get it, do you?" He sighed but I could tell he wasn't angry, just in a hurry.

He glanced quickly over his shoulder and when he saw that I was decent, he turned to face me. I shrugged as he came closer to me and helped me to stand before scooping me in his arms.

"If they find you here Amelia, it would be dishonouring for you."

I blinked. How could it be dishonouring. I would have been with Nori. Surely Dori could understand after all the time Nori and I spent together at night. Erm. That didn't sound quite exactly as I thought it would. But still. Nori was my friend, he was family and we never did anything inappropriate. Not really. So what could be the problem?

Seeing my frown, Nori elaborated while carrying me to the door of his bedroom.

"Amelia, I told you already. I'm not someone any woman should be seen with. If it were known you spent a night here…you would be considered…you wouldn't…" He hesitated.

"What? They would think what?" I sighed a little exasperatedly.

"That you're a woman with no honour, no virtue. That you lay with any men if you lay with someone like me."

I blinked and couldn't stop the blush as the meaning of his words was finally cleared. I found it stupid. Especially, because I couldn't see Dori or Ori gossiping about that and they wouldn't think such things of me. I was certain they wouldn't. But the problem here was that Nori was apparently really serious about these kinds of things. Who knew a thief could be very traditionalist in that way?

I knew there was no way to talk to him about this. He was already aware of my personal thoughts on the matter. There was no need to tell him once more than I didn't wish to marry anyone. There was no need to highlight the fact that no one would ever find out about this. Nori was the kind of person who would say 'I know about it and it's bad enough.'

It was annoying to say the least.

So I didn't say anything when the hand holding my back slid away for a second, opening the lock and the door in one swift move. Then Nori stepped out just as swiftly.

After just one step, Nori froze.

Maybe he wasn't such a good thief.

Or maybe he was tired.

I didn't know which but one thing was certain. If Nori had paid attention to his surrounding, he wouldn't have stepped out. Even I knew how it would look. I was coming out of his room in his arms, early in the morning, wearing the same clothes than the previous evening, a robe and a very short, thin and large tunic…

Yep that did look rather suspicious.

I felt Nori tense.

Danà blinked.

Several seconds passed like this. In silence while we all stared at each other.

Then Danà turned away and walked back to the kitchen. As the door closed behind her even I could hear her speak.

"She's still sleeping. No need to wake her quite so early Dori…"

I looked up at Nori but he didn't say a word. He didn't have to. I could easily read the regrets in his eyes and it simply broke my heart.

"Mahal…" He whispered before striding to my room.

He didn't say a word as he lowered me to my bed and left as quickly as we had come in.

He didn't look at me once.

* * *

><p>An hour or so later, someone softly knocked at my door.<p>

My throat was dry but I still managed to call the person to enter. I was still in the exact spot where Nori had left me. I hadn't moved. I was unsure of what was going to happen, but something was telling me that Nori wouldn't take it well whatever it was.

I wasn't surprised to see Danà come in. I was a bit more intrigued though to see that she was balancing a tray on her hand as she closed the door behind her. Silently she lay the tray down next to me on the bed and I realized it was full of food. Apparently I was allowed breakfast in bed today.

"Eat Amelia, you need to."

I swallowed thickly. I couldn't decipher Danà's tone or expression and it scared me.

"Danà…" I started but she stopped me with a smile.

"Amelia, eat first and we'll talk after."

I really wanted to obey her, but my stomach was suddenly full of anxious knots. Not listening to her I started to babble.

"Danà, I was so concerned for him that I went to see him yesterday. And then I was just so tired that I fell asleep. Nothing happened. Please tell me you didn't tell anyone. Nori is already barely talking to me now and…"

"He's barely talking to you?" Danà frowned, interrupting me.

I hesitated for all but a second before speaking again.

"Well, yes. He said something about being improper and that if anyone knew I would be dishonoured even though nothing happened."

"Mahal" Danà gaped at me. "He really is stupid."

I blinked at that.

"What?"

"Nothing." Danà shook her head and smiled at me. "Do not worry about anything Amelia. I didn't tell Dori. I know Nori. I've known him since he was a child. I know that despite appearances he is an honourable dwarf and I know that he wouldn't do anything he shouldn't do. Especially when you're concerned. So now eat and stop worrying."

I observed Danà as she grabbed a cup of steaming tea and handed it to me. Slowly I sipped the liquid, recognizing the taste of several medicinal plants. I nibbled at some bread roll. I wasn't hungry. I was just a bit lost. I had no way of really understanding this part of their culture. Well, I understood it but it was just too different from where I came from. It was odd.

I was lost in my thoughts when Danà kindly took the bead she had braided in my hair in her hand. She was smiling softly while turning the small bead between her fingers.

I didn't try to stop the smile that spread on my lips. Danà was looking at the bead as she frowned suddenly.

"Well, I won't tell Gloin about this though, that's for sure."

I blinked, surprised, and stupidly asked.

"Why? You said you knew nothing happened."

"Oh, I know that." She replied with a smile before she shook her head. "But Gloin would have to beat Nori to a pulp if he found out."

"What?" I squeaked, startled by this.

"Well, you did spend the night in his room and with him Amelia. As one of your kin, Gloin will take it as his responsibility to defend your honour. Dori obviously can't do it as he's Nori's brother. The responsibility in this case falls to Gloin."

I was flabbergasted. Honestly? They would actually fight over such a thing? That seemed like a perfect example of overreaction.

"Yes." She whispered to herself. "I won't tell what happened to any of these idiots. They don't understand such things."

She looked then at me and smiled some more.

"Amelia, eat." Danà remembered me as I was still trying to understand why people would fight over such a silly thing.

I took a piece of bread and swallowed it quickly before other thoughts crossed my mind.

"Danà, what's going to happen now? With Thorin I mean."

The older woman looked at me with sharp eyes before she sighed and shook her head once more. For a second I was distracted by the way her braids and their beads swayed with the movement. But then her voice brought me back to focus.

"Amelia, the things you did yesterday…" She started and hesitated for a second. "It was very reckless. Thorin is a good leader, he's fair and honourable. But he has a bad temper. When he's angry it is better not to say a word. Not immediately at least."

"He used me against Nori Danà!" I snapped, remembering the awful words he had said.

"I know. I know and it wasn't right. Sometimes he tends to…speak harsh words too quickly." Danà tried to calm my sudden anger. "Still, Nori had it coming. For decades Thorin has looked away when Nori was being brought back in chain. For decades he paid or helped Dori pay to bail him out. At some point though he stopped. He tried to talk Nori out of it. He gave him several warnings too Amelia."

"Has anyone of you ever tried to understand why he did it?" I asked both curious and angry.

"Of course we asked him!" She sounded slightly offended and I winced. "Nori never said a word. His lips are more sealed than a dwarf's vault!" She shook her head then and sighed. "Recently with all the troubles we've had with our caravans being attacked and the problems with men in general…well it's only normal that Thorin doesn't want Nori to create more."

"But what of Nori?"

"He'll finally stop to put himself in danger." Danà said calmly. "And you, for one, should appreciate that."

I chose to ignore her words. Sure Nori wouldn't be in danger within the Halls, but I knew all too well that this wasn't what he wanted. How could I not feel sad for him when he was going to be locked in here? After all the time I had spent convincing the dwarves to let me out…well I could only relate to his feelings now. And I hadn't my life running in the wilds to try and find back items belonging to my father.

Remembering the words I had exchanged with Nori I realized truly at that instant how complicated everything actually was. He wanted to give the beads to Dori and Ori. I was now quite certain he didn't want to hurt Dori and Ori if nothing was ever found back. I believed he was right about Dori; the kind dwarf wouldn't have been able to really help his younger brother. And Nori hadn't said a word about it, but I was certain he didn't want to disappoint Ori. If he never found the necklace back, he wouldn't have to face the hurt in his younger brother's face. If he never found it back, there wouldn't be any disappointment. Well except his own…

What a mess…

"And then?" I softly whispered. "He stays here and then what?"

The sad look Danà sent me was clear enough. She had no idea.

"Don't worry too much." She tried to reassure me. "I'm sure Balin and Dís will be able to make him see reason."

I nodded, though it didn't make me feel any better at all.

After this discussion I really wasn't hungry anymore. Plus I wanted to see if Nori was alright. With Danà's help I put on some decent clothes; she was the one to choose a nice purple dwarvish dress from my trunk too. Then I leant heavily on her in order to hop to the kitchen. It was a slow process and I was tired before I arrived at the door, but I didn't want anyone to carry me.

As she pushed the door open I wasn't surprised to see several other dwarves, namely, Bofur, Bifur and Balin, who sat with Dori, Nori and Ori. I was pleasantly surprised when I realized Nori hadn't run away, before I remembered that he probably couldn't run away anywhere.

Dori stood to come and help me as soon as he saw me.

"Amelia, here, let me." He said while extending his arms toward me.

As I saw Dori's face I really couldn't say no. The poor dwarf had had a tough few weeks and it was showing. I smiled softly at him, allowing him to scoop me up and carry me to the armchair that was still here.

"How are you today my dear?" Balin asked kindly.

"I'm fine."

"Did you sleep well lass? Did your leg bother you at all?" Bofur asked before turning towards the others. "I remember when I had an injury on the thigh once. It was impossible to find a comfortable way to lie down!"

I couldn't help it.

I really couldn't.

I blushed terribly.

How could I say that I had actually slept wonderfully and that it was actually really comfortable? I glanced at Nori and my blush just couldn't get brighter.

"Amee? What is it?" Ori sweetly asked me.

All the dwarves looked at me then. It didn't help. It didn't help at all. My blush actually worsened when I caught Nori's gaze and saw his cheeks were taking a slight pink tinge too. Quickly I averted my gaze. Ori was worried, Balin was frowning as if I was a problem to solve, Bofur was eyeing me with wide, surprised eyes and Dori was starting to look worried too. But the worst wasn't that. The worst was Danà who was looking between Nori and I and was now smirking knowingly.

The only answer I could give truly didn't seem like something I should say.

Actually I was pretty sure I shouldn't say anything about that night and morning to anyone. Ever.

Thankfully I didn't have to answer as Bifur decided to speak up. Everyone focused on him and I could finally breathe. Ori had explained once that Bifur was speaking only Khuzdul but that sometimes he slipped into an older form of it. The poor dwarf apparently had difficulties to talk to everyone because most of the dwarves nowadays didn't understand this older form.

Ori turned to me and translated the words.

"He said you managed well… I think."

"He said she did pretty well for her first fight." Dori corrected, while Bifur kept on talking. "A wolf isn't a what?"

"A wolf is a great foe." Danà provided.

"True enough." Bofur nodded. "Though, why did it attack you?" He asked the three brothers.

I was curious about that too. I knew nothing of wolves and their habits.

"Well, it looked like it was rather thin. I'm guessing it was a lone one that was famished." Dori shrugged as if it didn't matter much.

"A lone one?" Danà quirked an eyebrow.

"Aye. Its fur was black. It probably was kicked out of the pack. Wolves around are usually grey. It was the first black one I saw." Ori said, while taking some buttered bread before he placed it in front of me.

I didn't feel like eating, but I took the bread with a smile nonetheless. Meanwhile Bifur spoke once again.

"It's good, no…It was lucky that you survived." Balin translated frowning in concentration. "But you should train more."

I smiled at Bifur and without thinking answered him with one of the words I remembered of Iglishmêk.

'_Alright.'_

Bifur's eyes seemed to twinkle happily and he repeated that word too. My smile widened and I repeated it once more, earning several gasps.

My eyes turned to the other dwarves who had just realized I had used Iglishmêk. They were all shocked to say the least. I blushed some more. Only now did I remember it was supposed to be a secret between me and Kili.

The dwarves around me exchanged glances and were clearly unsure of how to react. It was Balin who spoke first.

"Amelia, where did you learn this?" His voice was kind so it calmed my sudden anxiety.

"I, erm, first I want to say that I only know a few words. Kili taught me. Like this I could ask for his help if something happened in Gorm back when Fili and Bofur were captured."

I saw the white bushy eyebrows of my guardian rise to his hairlines. Obviously he was surprised but then he didn't seem angry. A quick glance around told me none of them were actually and I sighed in relief.

"Why didn't you tell us earlier?" Dori asked genuinely curious and surprised.

"Because Kili was afraid you would all be rather angry." I answered quickly, holding my breath, waiting for their reactions.

"It is true that it shouldn't be taught to any strangers." Balin said pensively. "But then again, you've lived with us for a year now…"

"We should still ask Thorin about it." Dori frowned.

"I'm not sure it is such a good idea right now…" Danà retorted, looking at me pointedly.

"Well, Amelia is a ward and received several braids already. Surely teaching her Khuzdul and Iglishmêk won't be an issue." Bofur commented.

"I'm not saying it's an issue. But after yesterday…I don't think now would be a good time to talk to Thorin about it." Danà shook her head as both Dori and Balin agreed.

It was true that diplomacy hadn't been my priority yesterday. For my defence I could only say that it had been a rather sore topic and that I really was exhausted. Still, I didn't think the King would see it like that. I looked up to see Dori's frown and Nori's curious and suspicious look. He was staring right at me but I turned my attention elsewhere. I wasn't sure how Nori would react to me being stupidly snarky for him. Angering a King was never a good thing. I should know better, it was simple logic. But logic always seemed to run away from me whenever the three brothers, and especially Nori, were involved.

"Maybe we should keep that to us for now, and wait a bit before talking to Thorin about it." Balin proposed and everyone agreed.

"Amelia, just don't use those words you know in front of others. It might cause problem. You know how we are protective of our secrets."

I looked at Danà and nodded silently.

After that everyone started to leave. Dori helped me to go sit comfortably in the living room while Ori went out and Nori hid back in his room. As Dori went back in the kitchen to fetch me some chamomile tea, I realized Bofur was still there. He came to stand just beside me and bent at the waist to speak directly in my ear.

"Don't think I forgot that pretty blush of yours…I'm most curious as to why my old sneaky friend was blushing too."

My eyes widened. I glimpsed at Bofur. His eyes were twinkling with mischief and his smirk told me he wouldn't let me live it down. I felt my heart rate increase as I realized he would do everything to find out what had made me blush. Seeing my sudden anxiety, Bofur's smirk grew cheekier.

"And your reaction just told me that this was a secret I really want to know about…"

"Bofur…" I tried to threaten but only managed a small squeak.

"Yep, I'm really curious as to why you both blushed, especially when it was just after I talked about how comfortable your sleep had been." He looked incredibly amused before he winked at me. "See you later, Meli. Have sweet dreams tonight."

I looked slightly afraid as Bofur retreated and left me alone. He even happily whistled a merry tune as he closed the door behind him.

My heart was still beating rapidly.

Not only did Danà know, but Bofur suspected something too.

And I was quite certain that the cheeky dwarf wouldn't give up until he found exactly what had happened. I could already picture him nagging me every time we would see each other until I gave up and told him.

In Nori's words… Oh Mahal…

* * *

><p><strong>AN: I'm repeating myself, but it's always sincere so... Thank you a lot everyone :) I'm always happy to read your reviews, and I want to tell you that I'm always reading your comments carefully. Thanks everyone for taking the time to leave those comments. Thanks to the new readers/followers and favourites too :)**

**So...Here's the chapter that some of you have been waiting for quite a while. I hope Nori's reason didn't disappoint anyone. I know it's not overly original, and I'm sure not that many of you would be surprise. I just hope it makes sense.**

**I know, I know... I already had them spend a night together once...but I just couldn't help myself :P At least you can't say there wasn't enough Amelia/Nori moments ;) As you probably guessed, we're back for some peaceful chapters ^^ and this time Nori can't run away...hehehehe :P **

**and yes, Bofur is annoying and observant :)**

**I'm sorry I couldn't update sooner. I'll try to post the next chapter either this Sunday, or Monday at the latest :)**

**Have a nice weekend everyone, and thanks for all the kind support ;)**


	34. Family or not

**It all belongs to JRR Tolkien, except for the OC and the plot**

* * *

><p>Being injured in the thigh was more bothersome than I could have thought. I barely could move by myself and usually ended up more hurt than anything else when I tried to take a few steps.<p>

Thankfully Dori came home on the second day with a wooden crutch that Bifur had apparently whittled. When I saw it, I immediately smiled, until Bofur jumped from behind Dori with his damn cheeky smile and bright eyes.

"How are you today Amelia? Slept well?"

"Marvellously Bofur." I forced myself to keep the smile on my face. "How are you today? No work to do? No places to go to?"

"I thought I could keep you company. I know how being hurt in the thigh can be…uncomfortable." He waggled his eyebrows and I barely swallowed back an annoyed groan.

He was barely here a minute and I already felt like throttling him. It didn't bode well for his health…or my sanity.

"It truly isn't. You shouldn't bother." I said through gritted teeth.

I was starting to become really annoyed, or rather really unnerved. I didn't like Bofur's teasing, not that time. I knew it wasn't meant in a mean way, but it was a rather touchy topic and I knew that Nori wouldn't like everyone to know.

"It's no bother Meli. It's never a bother when it's for you." He blinked playfully while patting one of my hands.

"What has got into you Bofur?" Dori asked, surprised by Bofur overly cheery self.

"Nothing. I just love to see Amelia. She brightens my day with her natural pink glow. She makes everything seem so comfortable."

I glared at him while I felt a blush creep up my cheeks.

"See. The pink glow is back!" He exclaimed before chuckling.

Dori looked at Bofur with wide eyes, clearly unsure of what to think. I clenched my teeth but still tried to smile while Bofur went on and on about how much he loved me. At some point I sighed and chose to turn away from him. Being stuck in my armchair though, I could only turn my face. I ignored Bofur's love confession and let my eyes wander until they met a grey, angry gaze.

I quirked my eyebrow. I was surprised to see Nori staying hidden in the kitchen doorway. His anger surprised me even more. But as I caught his gaze, I smiled at him and tried to discreetly point at Bofur before rolling my eyes and sighing deeply. It apparently was enough to give Nori a small, a really small smirk. Anger left him, but he seemed to deflate and my heart clenched painfully when I saw him tiredly go back in the kitchen's shadows. He didn't reappear for the whole day after that.

Thankfully, Dori was exasperated, and probably a bit afraid, by Bofur's antics and he threw him out. He even ordered him not to come back if he was drunk. I didn't like Bofur's stunt, but seeing Dori take Bofur by his collar and literally throw him outside…well, that was fun.

I could only hope he wouldn't try again the next day.

* * *

><p>Thankfully, the crutch allowed me some more freedom inside our home but I didn't dare try and go out yet. Hopping around from my bedroom to the living room was difficult already. I was quickly tired and it wouldn't help anyone if I ended up waiting in the corridor for someone to pass by and carry me back. Besides, my leg was hurting almost all the time at first. And when it wasn't hurting, it was itching and I wanted nothing but to scratch but knew I couldn't. I settled for biting my nails but even that was stolen from me when Dori caught my wrist the first time he saw me.<p>

"Don't do that. It's unbecoming of a lady." He said, sounding terribly like my aunt did when she was about to scold me.

"I'm no lady Dori." I whined, if Dori sounded like my aunt, I could at least revert back to sound like a child.

"Then what are you? A miner?" He deadpanned while looking sterner than ever.

His eyes met mine evenly and I couldn't help but pout slightly. I felt properly chastised and it made me feel ten years younger. And definitely not in a good way.

I couldn't move, couldn't scratch, and couldn't even bite my nails. I was starting to hate being stuck in this stupid armchair.

I was glad that Dori had chased Bofur away. Two days had passed since then. Two days I had spent mostly alone in that stupid armchair, brooding over my own thoughts because Dori and Ori had to work, and Nori was hiding in his room. I sighed. More than annoyed, I was bored. Danà and Dís had come, of course, but even they had quite a lot to do as the summer season was usually the busiest period for the dwarves. They couldn't stay long, and usually they came to help me dress and clean up, before they had to leave. Gimli tried to visit too, but the poor dwarf was exhausted with his own training and busy schedule in the forges, so I kindly told him he should concentrate on that first. I didn't want him to feel guilty if he couldn't come to see me.

So here I was, alone and mumbling over stupid, prudish dwarves and stupid, overly teasing dwarves. Well, I grumbled more about the teasing ones actually. It wasn't that surprising that Bofur was the main target for my annoyance though. I didn't want him to bother me and I just knew he would try everything he could think of to find out why I had blushed.

Thinking back on that particular morning with Nori I couldn't help the heat to spread in my cheeks. It hadn't been the first time I had slept with Nori or in his arms, but somehow I couldn't shake the feeling that something had changed that specific night. I hoped Nori hadn't realized. It would be extremely awkward if he knew that my mind apparently drifted into weird territories when I was alone with him in the dark…

And there came the blush again.

I didn't know whether I should be glad or not that Nori had spent almost all his time in his room. He barely talked to any of us. He came out during meal times but he quickly went back in his room. Somehow I had the hunch that he spent his days looking at the few items he had collected. The idea that he was wallowing in what he clearly saw as a failure didn't sit well with me. I knew he was suffering, if not from his injuries anymore, at least he was pained by the King's orders and words.

But what hurt me more deeply than I thought it could, was the fact that he hadn't even glanced at me since that morning, two days ago. He was completely ignoring me, avoiding me almost.

I really didn't understand his reaction.

I hadn't meant to bother him, or to embarrass him. I just wanted to help. I wanted to help him so much. As those thoughts once again crossed my mind I sighed forlornly.

There was nothing I could do.

I couldn't help Nori. I couldn't even find myself an occupation. It was rather pathetic.

I couldn't even read the books that Ori brought me back because I couldn't read runes, or speak Khuzdul. Most of the books found in the Halls were written in the dwarves' languages, though some of them were transcription of Common in runes. In any cases it didn't help me. Usually Ori would read and translate for me but the young brother had to work. So I spent my time looking at the few pictures in the stories and at the fire in the hearth. Mostly I was worrying about Nori.

Time couldn't pass quickly enough.

* * *

><p>It had been a bit over a whole week now since I had woken up and after several days with the crutch I was now used to walk a bit around.<p>

Dori had gone for the whole day to the men's town nearby and Ori was with Balin reviewing contracts and doing whatever it was they usually did. It was unlikely that the younger brother would come back for lunch, which left me alone with Nori for the whole day. It could have been nice, except that Nori was still hiding away in his room.

Today though, I had enough of his recluse behaviour. I really didn't want to deal with it anymore. I didn't think that what happened between us was a proper reason for him to avoid me. I could understand his sour mood at being stuck within the Halls, but he didn't have to take it quite so literally. He hadn't been grounded like a child.

I was grumbling a bit under my breath as I tried to use my arms' strength more than my legs to stand. After a bit of effort I managed to stand on shaky legs. I took some minutes to calm my breath as I waited for the pain that had flared to recede. Then I slowly hobbled my way to his room.

Once in front of his door I knocked on it firmly and called for him.

I was at least happy to hear he didn't hesitate to come and open it for me.

"Hey there!" I said with a forced smile. "How are you today?"

He frowned slightly at that but answered in a sigh.

"Amelia I'm fine. Stop worrying for nothing please."

I ignored him and kept the smile as wide as possible while I looked at him. He seemed tired; I could see shadows under his eyes.

"I wouldn't have to worry if I could actually see you." I replied still smiling, though it was now tinted with sadness.

He looked down and didn't answer. I could see he was still really upset about being forced to stay here. I knew though that despite everything, he would try his best not to further anger the King. It wasn't for him he did it either; he did it for his brothers. I gingerly extended my hand to lightly brush his knuckles. He jolted and looked at me immediately, his eyes sharp despite his obvious tiredness.

"Why don't you come with me to the living room? We could spend some time together. I don't like that you hide in here all day long. And I don't like being alone when we could be together." My voice had become almost a whisper at the end.

I didn't know why. We were alone, and there was no need for me to lower my voice. Oddly though, it had seemed the right thing to do.

"Amelia, I'm not hiding…" He protested rather weakly.

"Yes you are. I barely saw you in the past week and I'm not sure you talked at all during meals in the past two days. We're all worried Nori." I locked my gaze in his grey eyes and softly asked. "Do you have any good reason for avoiding me…us?"

"Amelia I…it's…I'm…" It was a bit odd to see him stammer, and I could have sworn he was starting to blush slightly, which was odder still.

"Please. Can't you just, just come out a bit and spend some time with me?" It might be pathetic, but I resorted to pleading.

He was clearly hesitating but in the end, I won.

I couldn't stop the wide happy smile that tugged my lips. My heart skipped a beat when Nori saw it and smiled softly, kindly in answer. I could see his eyes were bright but couldn't quite name the feeling hidden away in the grey orbs. Slowly we made our way to the living room. I could feel Nori's eyes following me all the way, ensuring I wouldn't trip and hurt myself.

"What do you want to do then?" He asked, falling more than sitting in his usual armchair.

I sat in the one facing his and smiled some more. Catching one of the books with the most intriguing pictures, I handed it to him.

"Do you mind reading it for me?"

He observed me for a second before nodding and taking the book from my hand. As his fingers brushed mine I felt the now usual tingle that coursed through my skin every time I touched his.

I didn't let anything show though and comfortably sat back in the chair, looking at him as he opened the book slowly and cleared his throat.

Soon his deep, rumbling voice was telling me stories of warriors of old and their impressive deeds. Those were tales of glory and pain, of mystical quests and wondrous treasures. I was completely focused on Nori as he read. He would frown from time to time when the story related unfortunate events for the warrior, and I could see his eyes shine with hidden mirth when the hero was winning impressive battles of skills or wits. His smirk grew when the story took happy turns, and he pouted slightly when it grew more serious or sadder.

I couldn't express how peaceful I felt as Nori's voice was the only sound to be heard in our home.

I had just one thing to do; relish in that amazing feeling.

He read one whole and rather long story. As he pronounced the last words, his eyes glimpsed at me and he softly closed the book back, caressing the thick leather cover before putting it carefully on the nearby coffee table. Then only did he look at me in the eyes and he quirked an eyebrow.

I grinned happily and sat a bit straighter.

"I loved it!" I exclaimed joyously, almost childishly. "It was an amazing tale. Will you read some more to me later?"

"You liked it that much?" He asked with a small smirk.

"Of course" I answered while trying to stand up.

Immediately he was by my side, helping me carefully. Once I was standing, I realized how close to him I truly was and I had to struggle with my thoughts. I looked up at Nori to see him look away at the same moment. My heart seemed to beat loudly in my chest but I had to ignore it. I didn't want Nori to run back in his room right now.

"What are we going to eat for lunch?" I asked him, forcing him to glance at me.

He took a step back and while I grabbed my clutch and started to hobble to the kitchen, he answered.

"I have no idea."

"Great…" I deadpanned.

Still I sat in the kitchen while I observed him looking pensively at the ingredients he had taken out of the cellar. It was rather funny to see him look alternatively at the pan and then at the meat. It was funnier still when he put the meat back in the cellar and decided to simply cut some vegetables, and by vegetables I mean potatoes. In the end I discovered that Nori couldn't actually cook. At all. It was surprising to say the least, with all the time he spent alone running in the wilderness, I had thought he would be able to cook to at least survive.

"No skill is required to prepare an edible roast or boil potatoes." He answered when I told him my shock.

He stood up then, putting the potatoes he had cut in the pan with water and going to put it on the stove.

"No wonder you're skinny." I thought aloud.

At that he turned swiftly to face me. His shocked expression was rather funny and I smirked, choosing to tease him some more.

"Yep, you're really too skinny for a dwarf. Way too skinny."

"Oy!" He exclaimed, mock glaring at me though I could spot his smirk easily. "I'm no skinny elf! I'm a strong, healthy dwarf." He puffed his chest a bit and I had to bite the inside of my cheeks in order not to laugh at his antics.

"Sure…" I replied smirking widely, barely containing my laughter. "I totally agree with you."

"I'm telling you, you don't know what skinny look like until you've seen an elf." He insisted, pointing a finger at me.

"Right. I believe you."

"Oy…" He glared playfully, crossing his arms and puffing his chest some more.

"I said I believed you!" I finally laughed.

We kept on teasing each other until I forgot why we had started. It felt amazing talking with Nori like this. I was elated. Lunch was a merry moment even though it was just the two of us. All the while my heart beat loudly and would speed up every time Nori would look at me in the eyes.

What rejoiced me most though was to see Nori actually smile, smirk, wink and even laugh with me as if all his troubles were forgotten. And maybe for a short while they were.

That afternoon we stayed together. I didn't even have to ask him anything. Nori silently sat on his armchair and read me one more story before Ori finally came back, and later Dori.

* * *

><p>It became a sort of habit, something only the two of us shared. In the morning, after breakfast and Dori and Ori left, Nori would come out of his room and spend time with me until lunch. And then again in the afternoon we would find one thing or another to do.<p>

At first I couldn't move much and we soon became rather restricted in what we could do.

But I came upon an unlikely pastime after one of Danà's visits. She had only come to give me a quick hello. Gloin was outside, working for once as a mercenary, while Gimli was spending all his time between the forges and his training. Danà was in a hurry that day, but as I told her that I didn't have much to do, she rummaged through her large basket and handed me a ball of grey wool and knitting needles. Then she just left, telling me to have fun. I blinked as she disappeared through the door, thinking that she was joking.

Nori came out of his room soon after and snorted at the sight.

"What are you going to do with that?" He asked teasingly, obviously certain, that I wouldn't know how to use these.

I quirked an eyebrow and looked at him.

"What do you think those are used for?" I asked, a smirk tugging at the corner of my lips.

"Oh I know. I'm just not sure you do." He smirked smugly before sitting and taking his pipe out.

"I'll let you know that my aunt was an amazing knitter. She even made several jumpers for my uncle!" I replied proudly.

It was his turn now to quirk his braided eyebrow at me.

"Oh really?"

"Yes, really."

"Then by all means, show me how skilled you are." His smirk grew wider as I felt my face blanch.

My aunt knew how to knit. She had tried to teach me when I was young, really young. But I barely remembered. Still, it was a matter of pride and honour now. I glared at the needles in my hands.

That morning, Nori didn't read to me at all. Nope. He chuckled. He chuckled while I struggled with the wool and needles.

Still, by lunch time I was proud to show I had actually knitted a few ranks of what would be the first of many…many knitted pieces of clothing. As Ori came back for lunch and saw my work, he squealed in delight.

"Amelia! You knit?"

I startled when I heard him. I thought I was alone as Nori had left me minutes ago to go to the kitchen. I smiled at Ori.

"Well, I'm trying to." I answered showing him what I had done so far.

"Hmm, it's not very regular." He commented, looking closely as I pulled a face. "But with practice you'll be amazing, I'm sure! I'll show you how."

"You knit?" I couldn't help but ask in surprise.

"Yes." He answered happily. "But it's been awhile, so I might have forgotten some things."

"Damn." Nori's voice interrupted us. "Don't tell me you're going to start knitting again." He almost whined.

"But you always loved the things I knitted." Ori looked slightly distressed as Nori quickly strode to him.

"Of course I love them." He soothed his brother before adding in a sigh. "Knit to your heart's content Ori."

After that, the youngest brother and I spent all our evenings knitting together. It was fun.

I was glad to have found this activity. Thanks to Danà, my hands were now occupied as long as I had wool. I did hear Dori grumble at Nori that he should be the one paying for the wool since he had been the one to unleash both mine and Ori's creativity. But in the end the oldest brother was clearly happy to see Ori and me enjoying this hobby.

When Nori and I were alone now, he would either read to me or silently stay with me, smoking while I knitted. It felt homely and peaceful, though a bit odd. Nori never had been one to stay idle, and I knew he disliked staying home for too long. But he still spent his days with me, never once complaining, and it made my heart swell with a warm feeling.

After all, my leg had been badly injured and it took me several weeks before I could walk without my crutch again. Even though, I limped pathetically and tired even more quickly than with my crutch, so I kept the damn thing with me.

But Nori was already growing restless and I had no idea how to help him. Then, one morning, he arrived with two knives in one hand and two pieces of wood in the other. He put both of them in a bag and came directly to see me.

"Are you going somewhere?" I asked him, frowning at the bag he held.

"Yes, and you're coming with me." He replied with a smirk.

His eyes though, seemed unsure. I smiled to reassure him and nodded. I could see it, Nori was restless. He needed to get out of this home that was turning into a prison for him.

"Where are we going?"

At that he looked down and shifted awkwardly. Frowning he shrugged and answered without looking at me.

"I don't really know. I can't go out of the Halls, remember?" His voice was low and I could hear his annoyance and pain at this situation.

Gingerly I managed to step closer to him and brought one hand against his cheek, forcing him to look at me. I smiled softly when I met his eyes, my breath caught for a second until I found the force to blink. I let my smile grew softer still and answered in a low whisper.

"I don't care where we go Nori. As long as we don't have to talk with tons of curious dwarves, anything is fine by me."

He smiled, clearly relieved and maybe a bit grateful and my heart leapt in my chest. Then he nodded and gestured me toward the door.

"Let's go then."

In the end we started to walk in the corridors and I simply followed Nori's lead. At some point he seemed to have an idea where to go and seemed almost happy. Still, after a short while I grew tired and had to stop. I wasn't used to use my crutch for quite so long.

"Is it far still?" I asked him, catching my breath slowly.

"Yeah, quite. Maybe we should find something around here." He mumbled in reply.

He wasn't quick enough to hide his disappointment though, and I gently poked him in the shoulder, forcing him to look at me again.

"Or you could actually be a gentleman instead of a rude dwarf." I replied with a small smile.

He frowned and then quirked an eyebrow at me, clearly not sure of what to retort. He hesitated for a few seconds more before he retorted, narrowing his eyes a bit.

"I always am a perfect gentleman."

"Yeah?"

"Aye."

"You sure?"

"Absolutely certain."

"Then turn away and crouch mister, you're going to carry me there." I smiled smugly at him, happy at the prospect not to hobble for awhile.

He looked surprised at first but then shook his head with a small, disbelieving smile before he simply obeyed. Maybe it should have surprised me, but in the end it didn't. I really couldn't have walked much further and I knew Nori would have to either carry me home or wherever it was he wanted to go. He didn't even seem annoyed by this.

In an instant he was walking once more with me on his back. I had one arm around his shoulder, holding onto him, and the other was holding my crutch and his bag. I let my chin rest on his shoulder and smiled softly, whispering in his ear.

"See, much better. But we should do something about your starfish hairdo, it's not very practical."

He chuckled a bit and craned his neck to look at me. There was a happy glint in his eyes and it only made my smile widen some more.

"Admit it Mizimul…" He whispered, mischief written all over his features.

"Admit what?" I breathed out, wondering what he was going to come up with.

"You love my hair."

I blushed a bit and turned my head the other way while he chuckled. Still I couldn't help but whisper.

"Aye, that I do."

I couldn't look at him or even talk for awhile after that. My cheeks were red and it took me a bit of time to compose myself. Nori really had an odd influence on me.

He carried me silently up volleys of stairs and I wondered at that point whether he had actually hoped for me to walk up to the highest places in Thorin's Halls. The place where he wanted to go was indeed really far. I was curious about it, but no matter how much I nagged him to tell me where we were going, Nori remained silent. His damn smug smirk never left him though.

When he stopped I looked around in wonder.

We were in one of the highest spot of Thorin's Halls.

Nori had carried me all the way up to one of the rather large openings that provided natural light in the Halls. It was narrow and tall, and a fresh breeze came from the outside. It wasn't as good as being outdoors, but it was already really nice. From our spot we could see far bellow fellow dwarves rushing from one side of the Halls to the other. It was calm and peaceful. Nori slowly lowered me to the stone floor and then gently guided me to sit against the wall, where the breeze will softly blew on us both.

He sat just next to me, our shoulders touching, and I felt the urge to lower my head and rest it on him. Still I resisted and instead asked him curiously.

"Now what?"

"Now I teach you one of the dwarves' favourite pastimes." He replied, rummaging through the bag he brought.

"Drinking ale?" I deadpanned.

His soft chuckle made me smile broadly.

"Nope, whittling." He answered, handing me one piece of wood and a knife.

"I have no idea how to do that." I said in a shocked whisper.

"That's why I'm going to teach you." He replied softly.

The whole afternoon we spent together. Nori was kind and patient with me. I wasn't very good at whittling but he never seemed annoyed or exasperated, if anything he would smile kindly every time I complained about the task being too complicated.

If I were honest though, I would admit I enjoyed every second of it.

From time to time, Nori would place his hands on top of mine and gently guide them into precise moves. Then he would linger for a second before letting go. Each time my heart leapt. Each time my breath itched. Each time I remained silent and simply smiled at him.

At the end of the afternoon, Nori had made something that looked like a dwarf, but he was far from finished. My piece of wood that was supposed to turn into a wolf just didn't look like anything. Its head had been severed by an unlucky strike with the knife and its tail was probably bigger than its body. Nori actually chuckled when he saw the results.

"Well, you still have to practice a lot."

I mock glared at him. But I wasn't the least bit offended. I had ruined the piece of wood; it would end in the hearth tonight. As I looked at Nori's crinkled eyes that shone with amusement for the first time in a while, I blurted out the first words that came through my mind.

"We might as well come back here until I know how to do it then."

He seemed a bit startled and my heart clenched in fear. Suddenly I started to ask myself why I would say such things. My fear were meaningless though as I heard him whisper.

"Aye, we could do that." He answered softly, not looking at me.

He carried me all the way down, letting me walk only once we arrived in the corridor that led directly to our home. Dori and Ori were here when we entered.

"Where were you?" Dori immediately asked, clearly worried.

"I didn't go out Dori." Nori snapped.

"I never said that Nori." Exasperation could be easily heard in Dori's tone.

The old dwarf had immediately reacted to Nori's tone by crossing his arms and glaring at his younger brother. His cold stare was stern and riveted on Nori.

"Why do you even care?" Nori groaned angrily, trying to push past his brother who was still in the way.

Nori's sudden mood change didn't surprise me in the least. I knew we had it coming. He had been restless and on the edge for days. It wasn't the fact that he was here, he had stayed home for months before. No, it was that he had no choice but to be here. The fact that his choices had been taken from him was clearly what bothered him most.

He had been fine that day, or at least I thought he had. But I guessed that right now, he perceived Dori's worries as distrust. If I were him, I would probably feel cornered or under surveillance.

As I thought about that their argument was starting to escalate and I just couldn't let it. Ori was sitting on the side, observing his two older brothers with a sad frown I understood all too well. I took a few, shaky steps towards them and placed a hand on Nori's arm, glancing at him before looking at Dori.

"Why don't we all try to calm a bit? Dori, Nori you both know that's not what the other meant. Can't you all be honest with each other?" I said very softly.

The three brothers looked at me, first surprised, then slightly pained. They all looked away at once. Their gazes were directed anywhere but at each other. I sighed loudly and decided to talk first, maybe I could voice their thoughts without them needing to explain further.

"Nori, we're all worried. We care for you and we are hurt to see you forced to stay here. We'd like to help you any way we could, but we're at a loss." My voice was barely above a murmur and I felt Nori tense under my hand. "Dori, try not to worry so much. I know you trust Nori to stay within the Halls. And you know he won't get into trouble here. There's nothing to worry about."

Nori and Dori both looked a bit sheepish and glanced at each other quickly. They held their gazes for a few seconds before both nodding. Well, that was as much as I could ever get from them. I smiled at Ori who seemed relieved.

"And you Mister" I said to the youngest one. "I know you believe dwarves don't cuddle, but it would be amazing if you agreed to hug me right now."

With a soft smile, Ori obliged and quickly strode to me. I squeaked in delight as he engulfed me in his arms and made me spin a bit. I had to let the crutch go lest I hit Nori or Dori with it. After a few spins I was laughing and complimenting Ori for hiding his impressive strength so well. When we both looked up, the tension had disappeared and both Nori and Dori were smiling softly at our antics. It was easy to see their eyes shone brightly and warmly while looking at both Ori and I. And to be honest, we replied in kind.

That evening was then spent discussing various topics. At first, it was mostly Ori and me who talked. I didn't show them the piece of wood that was supposed to look like a wolf but didn't. Nori was already teasing me about it. So I ended up talking about knitting and patterns with Ori, while Dori and Nori visibly paled at our enthusiasm. Honestly, I didn't think I would enjoy knitting quite so much. I had always thought it was a pastime for old ladies and I had quickly turned away from it when I was back in my world. I briefly wondered what my aunt would have said to see me discuss patterns with Ori…she probably would have joined us.

As we sat all together, I told Ori about the latest story Nori had read for me and the younger dwarf promised to find me some more books.

"Oh please Ori, be merciful." Nori exclaimed with a grimace. "I'll lose my voice, talking so much…"

Ori was clearly finding it funny to see his older brother being more or less obliged to read lots of stories. It usually was him who did all the reading, not Nori.

"Oy! Don't try and pretend you don't like those stories." I retorted with a smile, my chin resting on the palm of my hand.

Nori's eyes were shining with amusement once more and he was about to reply when his older brother interrupted us.

"Actually, it might be a good idea to give you books about history and geography then." Dori said pensively.

"Why?" I asked genuinely curious.

Nori was looking at his older brother with a mixture of shock, disbelief and horror on his face. I wasn't sure whether it was a show or whether he really felt those, but it greatly amused Ori. Dori's face was serene as he looked at me and answered, though I could see a small twitch at the corner of his mouth.

"Nori always skipped class as a young lad. If he's forced to read and translate books for you, we might as well make up for lost time." Dori's eyes were twinkling as he answered and both Ori and I laughed heartily.

"Oy! Don't you dare!" Nori complained, though he couldn't dissimulate an amused smirk.

At that time I almost managed to forget about my injury and Nori's pain. All my worries always seemed to disappear when the four of us were together and laughing, teasing each other happily.

But as days passed and turned into weeks, Nori started to become more restless.

I could walk alone now, but not on long distance so I kept my crutch with me. Nori would still carry me on his back when we'd go to what I was starting to think as our hiding spot, near the openings far above the Halls. I was now able to whittle simple things and I knew a fair lot of dwarvish stories. But even I was starting to become bored, so I could only imagine how Nori was feeling.

He had been so free before.

I could easily picture him sneaking out of the Halls, in the darkness of night, and coming back as the sun rose. He had once been proud, smug, cheeky and confident. Now though it felt as if he was wearing invisible chains around his neck. He still managed to smile with me and his brothers, but he had grown distant of the others, even Bofur who was his closest friend. Well, that might have been because Dori banned the cheeky dwarf from coming in after he teased me mercilessly a second time. It took Dori a whole week before he accepted Bofur back in, and the other dwarf was forced to remain calm under the threat of being kicked back out if he didn't behave. Though, I could tell his eyes were observing me and Nori sharply each time he came in with his brother and cousin.

It didn't matter much in the end, because there was nothing really to observe. When other dwarves came to visit us, Nori would mostly stay silent and would quickly disappear in the shadows or back in his room. Bofur wouldn't have anything to observe. But even if he had, it wouldn't matter to me. All my thoughts or most of them at least, were focused on Nori.

I could see how tired he was. I could see in his eyes how restless he was. I could see it all…but I had no idea how to help him.

I was thinking about it late one afternoon as Nori didn't quite manage to hide his pain from me that day. His eyes were staring unseeingly at the fire in the hearth. I could see he was frowning and his body seemed tensed.

As we sat in silence in the living room, I thought about how I would react if I were treated like this. The wool and needles were forgotten on my lap as I lost myself in my thoughts. I had never been grounded, but I had never been one to go out much either. But here the problem was that Nori was used to be free. I frowned. If I were Nori, I would probably have reacted in a rather bad way. After all, he was an adult and was being punished like a teenage boy who had sneaked out at night to see his friends.

I startled.

Nori looked at me, surprised to see me smile cheekily at him.

"What?" He said, frowning suspiciously at me.

I chose not to answer. I wasn't sure how to carry out the idea I just had, I wasn't even sure I could. I needed to think a bit about it. Nori was eyeing me suspiciously. He obviously knew me well enough to know that something was going on in my mind. I could have told him but I would rather surprise him.

"Nothing, I just thought about something." I replied, trying to placate him.

He didn't seem convinced. Not at all actually. Instead of staying here with Nori observing me I decided to retreat to my room. I would have to wait until later before I could do anything. I hoped Nori would be properly surprised and would like my idea.

While I was waiting for dinner, I decided to start to prepare for my little surprise. First I had to empty my travelling bag. I would need two warm blankets. I rolled them properly and hid them in my bag. I looked around in my room. I wouldn't need my medicinal satchel, nor should I need anything I had here. Maybe I should gather some food and drinks, but that would have to wait until after Dori and Ori had gone to their rooms.

I had always been a patient person but waiting for dinner that afternoon was excruciating. I was fidgeting and I knew Nori could see it when I went back to the kitchen. I tried to help Dori with cooking dinner but I was so nervous that I ended up spilling water everywhere on the floor and knocking down plates and pots. In the end Dori exasperatedly asked me to sit and wait.

I obeyed sheepishly, still under the watchful gaze of a growingly suspicious Nori.

Soon after, we were surprised by the unexpected arrival of Bofur, Bombur and Bifur. The three of them had always come at random, but since Nori had been forced to stay, they tried to come even more often. It was very kind of them. It highlighted once more how loyal dwarves were. They tried their best cheering Nori up, well, that is, when Bofur wasn't too busy observing me. It was obvious too that they cared. That day, Bombur had prepared and cooked lots of food and a huge pile of sausages that were mostly eaten by Nori.

That evening we managed to make him act almost normally.

Still, a few exchanged glances were enough to see what no one said aloud. Nori wasn't going too well. He was obviously suffering from his lack of activities. If only the King would let him go out, at least to follow some of the caravans. Some of those didn't even go that far. I didn't see how that could be a problem to let Nori go with them.

But well, no one could change the King's decision.

Nori did manage to act as if nothing was bothering him and no one said a word. Everyone acted as if everything was perfectly normal.

Putting aside worries about Nori, dinner was rather merry that evening.

Everything went well, except for a short moment when Bofur managed to talk to me alone. I was too preoccupied by Nori and my little surprise to pay attention to the cheeky dwarf.

The dwarf had tried several times already to talk with me but I had somehow always managed to avoid being alone with him. Usually, I would hide with Dori and one glare from the older dwarf would simply forced Bofur to shut up. Until now, and after the two terrible times he made fun of me, I only had to accept his suspicious and highly amused glances.

That evening though, I ran out of luck and he managed to catch me unaware.

The meal was finished and all the dwarves were now moving to the living room with their pipes in one hand and tankard of ale in the other. I had stayed behind in the kitchen to prepare a chamomile tea for myself. I was currently putting a kettle on the stove, humming a tune to myself and not paying attention to my surroundings. I was in a safe place and had assumed all the dwarves were now talking about one thing or another in the living room. Maybe Bofur and Nori were even trying to blow rings of smoke to the ceiling.

"So, merry Meli, what are you hiding?" Bofur's cheerful voice whispered in my ear.

I startled.

Turning sharply around I saw him take a step back, chuckling at my reaction. His eyes shone with mischief and mirth and his smirk was entirely too smug for my taste.

"No need to be jumpy. Just wanted to check you were fine lass. Slept well these days?"

"Perfectly Bofur, thank you for your concern." I replied, trying to sound nice though I didn't like the fact that Bofur couldn't keep his nose away from others' businesses.

"Really? I hope you've been comfortable, what with your leg and the small bed…" His damn eyes were twinkling with mirth, I could have sworn it.

"My leg is healing well and my bed has just the perfect size Bofur." I interrupted him.

"Really?" His smirk grew impossibly smug at that and his eyes stared intently at me.

"It isn't like you to speak in riddle Bofur. Usually you bluntly speak your mind."

I couldn't help but be rather annoyed even though I was mostly anxious that the curious dwarf would manage to guess why I had blushed. I wasn't even sure why I didn't want him to know. Objectively nothing had happened. Still I didn't want anyone to learn about it. The fact that Danà had seen us getting out of Nori's room was bad enough. Still, she had been kind enough not to say a word about it, not once.

I knew that in this place it would be highly frowned upon. I didn't care about what people would think about me, I really wasn't expecting an army of suitors coming at my door. But I knew perfectly well that Nori did care about those things. It baffled me, but he cared and as a consequence I was nervous.

And Bofur sensed it.

I loved that dwarf, but right then he was nothing but a pain.

He was looking at me with a small smirk tugging at his lips but I could see he didn't do it meanly. He was just too curious for his own good.

"I know something happened, Meli. I'm just curious what it could be, especially when I see how strongly you protect the secret."

"Nothing happened and if anything did, why would I tell you?" I turned away.

I knew I had been a good liar when I had to confront men in towns. But this was different. Bofur made me nervous and he knew me. Besides, the simple thought of that night with Nori made me inexplicably blush. If Bofur saw my cheeks reddening now, I would never hear the end of it. He would ask me endlessly what was going on to the point where I would tell him just so he would leave me alone.

"So something happened…" Bofur's happy voice brought me back to the present.

"No…" I tried to retort, wondering briefly whether I had thought aloud.

"But you said…"

"I said if!" I snarled and glared at him.

"But every time someone uses 'if' it means it did happen."

My head was starting to spin. Talking about things happening, ifs and so on with Bofur was just confusing me. I tiredly rubbed my forehead with my right hand, sighing loudly. As I was about to retort something, Bofur stepped closer and put his hand on my shoulder. I looked in his eyes and the mischief was gone. Instead I saw him smile kindly at me. He was completely serious right now, I could tell.

"Amelia, I know nothing serious happened."

This was more than confusing. Was he saying that he was bothering me just for the pleasure of actually seeing me squirming nervously? As I was thinking about that, Bofur leant closer and whispered in my ear.

"Nori's an old friend Meli. I know him very well."

I swallowed, looking away. What did he mean by that? What did that imply? Why was I suddenly more nervous than ever?

To my horror, he simply winked at me and stepped away. He was whistling a merry tune when he left the kitchen. I was puzzled and silent for a moment until the door opened again. This time Nori came in, brows furrowed in a quizzical pout, and glanced at me, frowning some more.

"Are you alright?"

How to answer to that?

I was alright. I truly was. My leg was healing nicely and almost didn't hurt at all anymore. I even had good hopes I wouldn't limp at all. Even Dís had been pleasantly surprised to see me heal so well and so quickly. I was living with people who had become my family in all but blood. I was planning a surprise to one of my closest friends or family member, or whatever it was that Nori was. I was alright because I truly had no reason not to be.

But then I was rather anxious. Not only because of Bofur and his new found appreciation for hidden messages. No, that was annoying but I was rather certain that, even if he did learn everything, Bofur wouldn't talk about it. He was Nori's friend. He said it himself, one of his old friends. Surely that counted for something. I was nervous because of Bofur but not overly so. No. Nori worried me much more. I knew he was weeks, maybe days away of doing some mistakes.

I couldn't let that happen.

Then there was another issue I had to deal with. One I wouldn't speak about with any of the dwarves. It was nothing life threatening. No. it was just really annoying. Recently, well in the past months at least, I had been reacting strangely whenever Nori was close by. At first I hadn't paid attention to it, but now…now it was hard to ignore.

I knew objectively it wasn't anything grave or serious.

But it was starting to unnerve me greatly. In the past weeks, I had spent lots of time with only Nori. This time spent together had only highlighted what I knew already. Nori was a kind and calm dwarf. I believed he enjoyed our silly banters as much as I did. He was cheeky, but that wasn't a surprise, and patient, which shouldn't surprise me either.

It was obvious in the way he behaved that he was a thief. But it was easy to see when one spent some time with him that he was a dwarf above everything else. He was one to the core. He laughed easily, though maybe not as loudly as others and bluntly stated his opinion. He enjoyed ale and meat as much as any others and knew better than most how to whittle, even though his skills were surpassed easily by Bofur and Bifur.

He was a dwarf, good hearted, loyal, brave, kind, fierce and strong. He was a thief, deft, quiet, mischievous, dangerous, observant and smart. He was all that and much, much more.

"Amelia?"

I startled after hearing his voice so close to me. Looking up I saw him just steps away. He was not only suspicious anymore, he was clearly worried.

"I'm fine Nori."

I forced a small smile on my lips. It wasn't enough to placate him. That much was obvious.

He took one more steps towards me. My heart was starting to beat strongly in my chest but that was getting usual. Nori tilted his head to his side and crossed his arms over his chest.

"Mizimul" He whispered softly. "What's going on?"

I opened my mouth to answer when a whizzing noise reminded me of the kettle on the stove. Quickly I turned and prepared my tea. Nori was behind me. I could feel his eyes following my every move. I had to reassure him or I just knew he would become far worse than Bofur.

"I am fine. Bofur is just teasing me."

I faced him and looked straight in his eyes. His grey eyes were doubtful and seemed to bore into me.

"You would tell me, right? If something was going on I mean."

He looked suddenly rather worried, as if I wouldn't trust him if I had problems. Well, if I were entirely honest I didn't know what I would or wouldn't tell him. My brain was getting confused again and it was a sure sign I was tired and needed to stop this discussion. If he wanted to know whether or not I trusted him though, that was an easy question.

My eyes were riveted in his. I slowly raised my hand and rested it on one of his forearms.

I squeezed it. Just slightly.

"I trust you Nori. Always have, always will."

He pondered a bit before I saw his usual slow, teasing smirk.

"Always have?"

I blinked.

It was just like him to make me find my smile back in any circumstances.

A smile tugged at my lips as I looked at him. I was glad he found it in himself to tease me. I was glad that he was even able to smirk. I couldn't let him down.

"Well, maybe not always. For the first few days I really thought you were nothing but a crazy guy who was wearing weird clothes and weapons. But really, it didn't last much."

His low chuckle was making my heart falter. It made me smile wider. His eyes shone with amusement and mine were probably reflecting the same feelings. I was about to add something when Ori came in, wondering why we didn't come in the living room with them.

In all but a second I forgot my heart rate and the pleasant tingle that coursed through my skin every time Nori would brush past it.

Soon I was listening to their laughs and the sound of Bofur's flute. He was the only one playing until he started to sing a song about ale and the man in the moon. It was merry, funny and soon enough every dwarf was singing loudly along. And that included Nori.

All in all it was really late when everyone finally decided to stop partying. Bofur, Bifur and Bombur left, Bofur still singing happily.

Dori, Nori and Ori went back to their rooms, and I did too, though I only stayed there for the time I needed to grab my bag and make certain that the brothers would stay in theirs. Then only I went back to the cellar and put some apples in my bag as well as two bottles I filled with brown ale and then corked. Once my bag was ready I slowly made my way towards Nori's bedroom.

My leg was hurting a bit but it was easily forgettable.

I stilled for a minute, listening intently, wondering whether Dori and Ori were already asleep or not. After a short moment though, I realized that I wouldn't hear anything anyway. I knocked softly against Nori's door and whispered his name. I barely had the time to wonder whether or not he heard me when the door opened.

"Amelia? What's going on?" Immediately his voice took a concerned edge and I had to ease his worries.

"Shh, everything's fine." I whispered with a smile. "Come, follow me. Quickly, I don't want to wake Dori or Ori."

I grabbed his arm for good measure and he let me tug him toward the kitchen. Once the door was closed behind us and he saw my bag waiting for me on the kitchen, he frowned and tensed.

"Amelia, what is this? What are you planning? Don't tell me you're leaving?"

His voice was growing more concerned and I saw he wasn't only worried but almost scared too. Immediately I put both my hands on his shoulders and looked straight in his eyes.

"Hey, no worries. I'm going out, and you're coming with me." I smiled widely at the end, clearly happy to have surprised him.

"Alright. Wait…what?" He stammered, clearly bewildered.

"Come Nori, tonight we're sneaking out of the Halls." I couldn't help but be a little excited at the prospect of sneaking out with Nori.

It would be fun. I was certain of it. And maybe the fact we would be walking around in the night would make him feel a tad better. I saw a smirk pull at his lips before he grew serious again in a second.

"Amelia. We can't go out." He frowned.

"Nori" I retorted. "We're not leaving. I just want to breathe some fresh air and look at the stars. We'll be back before anyone can see we left."

I saw him hesitate. Obviously he wanted to go out as well, the thought of having to sneak out was clearly pleasing him. It was probably only the fact that we might get in trouble that stopped him. Still, I couldn't help but think it wouldn't stop him for long. It had never bothered him before.

"I'm sure you know more than one way out of the Halls." I insisted, tilting my head a bit.

"Of course." He scoffed before realizing what he had said.

He mock glared at me as I still smiled widely.

"Nori, we wouldn't go far. I prepared some snacks if one of us gets hungry and blankets in case it's cold. I just thought it would be nice for the both of us." I spoke softly.

I knew I had as many chances of convincing him as I had of not achieving this little objective. Nori was honourable, I was certain that he always tried his best to keep his word. He took promises very seriously, I knew that. But he hadn't given his words to the King. He said no word at all actually. He said nothing and that alone should have hinted all the dwarves around that Nori would make a mistake at some point.

"Nori…"

"Alright."

We had spoken both at the same time but his simple word had effectively stopped the little speech I had planned to give.

Instead I smiled to the point I wondered whether it would hurt or not. I did manage not to squeak excitedly though.

"Let's go then." I whispered not hiding how happy I was from him.

"Are you sure you'll be able to walk? Do you want me to carry you?"

"I'll manage for a bit at least." I answered honestly.

With Nori there was really no point in hiding the truth, he would find out anyway.

"Alright." He smirked and winked at me. "Follow me closely and give me that bag."

It hadn't been that hard to convince him. Now I was certain that we had been days away of a major mistake. Nori was clearly missing his freedom and this little stunt I was proposing would allow him to relax a bit. And if anyone had anything to say, I would be able to honestly answer I was the one to ask him. I was the one who insisted. Nori was not doing anything wrong.

I followed him easily. He was walking slowly in the dark corridors. More than once he crouched and I imitated him. I was impressed by his stealth. I felt like an elephant walking behind him. It was fun though to observe him, all serious and thief-like.

At some point we turned into a slightly larger corridor that led to several smaller ones. We were walking silently when the unmistakable noise of heavy footsteps startled me. I didn't even have the time to react before Nori grabbed my arm with one hand, his other one pressing against my mouth to prevent me from gasping loudly in surprise. I felt him tug me toward one of the darkest and smallest nearby corridors.

Quickly I found myself caged between the cold stone wall and Nori's warm chest. We were hidden in the shadows but what I had thought to be a corridor was actually a natural nook in the blue stone. There wasn't much space. I could feel Nori's breathe against my neck and I cursed myself when a shiver ran down my spine. I closed my eyes.

Oh damn…

It was an awkward situation.

Yet I could only hear my own heart beating loudly against my ribcage.

My whole body was tingling because Nori was just too close this time.

I was overly conscious of his body so close to mine.

I refused to look at him and was entirely too glad for the darkness that hid the redness of my cheeks.

I prayed for the dwarf who was walking around to walk a bit more quickly. As I tried to concentrate on the sound of his steps, I realized he was coming closer. Nori placed one finger on my mouth and my throat went completely dry. I glanced at him but he wasn't looking at me. As the step came closer, I felt Nori press a bit more against me. I stopped breathing entirely.

Oh damn…oh damn…

Could Nori feel my heart pounding in my chest? I hoped not.

After what seemed like an eternity Nori shifted a bit. I opened my eyes slowly and kept holding my breath as he moved away from me noiselessly. I immediately felt a pang in my chest. I was…disappointed. Why was I disappointed? I shouldn't be disappointed. I shouldn't even be feeling what I felt. It was weird. It wasn't normal.

Nori was family. Nori was just family. Nori will always be family only.

Why did these thoughts depress me so much?

It was only when I felt Nori gently tug on my arm that I realized we should keep moving. He didn't look at me and I didn't try to observe him. I was glad I had a few minutes to recollect myself.

After this little scare we didn't meet anyone else. It was rather thrilling to walk in the empty corridors. Too soon though, I started to tire and had to stop. The pain in my leg was more intense with the forced exercise. Immediately Nori crouched beside me and worriedly asked how I was doing.

"I'm fine Nori." I answered. "I'm not used to walk quite so much anymore."

It was depressing to see that all the efforts I had made to become stronger had been for nothing. I was weaker than ever. Nori probably realized how sad it made me to think about that because I felt his hand softly press against my cheek. He forced me to look up at him.

"You're doing great with your recovery. Give it time Mizimul. You'll be fine."

"I'll have to start everything back from scratch." I whispered shamefully.

"I'll help you." Nori breathed out, looking away.

I felt a few tears gather in my eyes. Strangely I was deeply moved by this little comment, this promise. Nori would help me. That heartened me more than anything else possibly could.

"Thanks." I murmured.

He only hummed in answer. He didn't give me anymore time though and he immediately turned his back at me.

"Here, let me carry you." He whispered. "We're close by."

"Alright."

I grabbed his shoulders as he stood back up while carrying me on his back. I held the bag now and, just like we had done so many times before, I let my head rest on his shoulder. Nori didn't seem bothered at all by the added weight. He was still able to move noiselessly in the corridors.

He passed through many doors and pathways I didn't know. I only realized we were going upwards, definitely not in the direction of the massive entrance doors.

"Where are we going?" I whispered in his ear, my lips so close it brushed his skin there.

I almost gasped aloud at that moment when Nori stumbled on the even floor. It was the first time he was breaking his smooth strides and it was quite surprising. He quickly recovered though and soon he was walking as if nothing had happened.

"I, erm, we're walking toward a side entrance." He stammered lowly.

"A side entrance? I didn't know there were side entrances."

"Well, of course there wouldn't only be one way in and out of the mountain." He craned his neck and smirked at me.

"But what about the guards?" I ignored his smirk and concentrated on our little sneaking out mission.

"There won't be any. You said you wanted to see the stars, right? So I'm leading us to one of the highest place. This isn't really an entrance, it's just an opening used by the guards on watch in the mountain. You can't access it from below, and the only way it leads to, is up to the mountain top."

"Won't there be more risk for us to get caught then?"

"Usually there's one, maybe two guards who come up and look around quickly per night. There's a pair of watchers in the mountain too." He explained and I didn't even find it odd that he seemed to know the guards' habits so well.

"You're not afraid they'll see us?" I insisted.

"They never saw me before. I know the ways they use."

I was surprised to hear that. So Nori was carrying me to one of his little hidden place. But if he could get out so easily, why then did he stay in? Why didn't he try to get out during the nights? I didn't say a word as we arrived at a small entrance.

I could feel a cold breeze and see the starlight outside. I couldn't resist the smile that pulled my lips slowly. Nori slowly moved towards the entrance and glanced around. Apparently satisfied that we didn't risk anything, he walked through and the cold of the night mountain air woke me completely. I was now as alert as I could be. Nori's steps didn't falter as he walked on a small path that went up.

I held my breath when I looked at the valley below. I could barely see anything, we were quite high already. We were walking on an edge and a misstep would make us plummet down to our death. Now I could see what Nori had meant. There was no way someone would attack from that side of the mountain. It would be probably too much trouble and seemed rather easy to defend. Well, easy to defend if there were guards around that is.

I couldn't help but think that there was a clear weakness here. Nori had noticed it too. Maybe he should give some advises to the King, though I didn't think they would be welcomed.

While I was thinking about defence and Nori's point of view on those topics, the dwarf had carried me a long way to the side of the mountain. The path appeared unused and when I saw how close Nori was stepping to the edge I couldn't help but hold on him tighter. He was using his left hand to lean a bit on the rocks of the mountain's side, but his right one came to gently squeeze mine. It was slightly reassuring but I wouldn't be happy until we stopped wherever it was that Nori wanted to go.

A good ten minutes later we arrived in a small area where a few people could sit without risking falling down. I realized that this small path was actually a dead end and we had reached it.

"We can't make too much noise or the guards will hear." Nori whispered while lowering me to the ground.

I nodded while I rummaged through my bag and took the two blankets out. I glanced at Nori. He was smiling softly and gazing at the sky. I could see his relief clearly. Why hadn't he come up here if that was already enough to ease his restlessness? I didn't ask him and simply handed him one of the blankets. I wished I had taken more.

It was summer and I had thought that it wouldn't be that cold outside. Obviously I still wasn't used to live in mountains. It was cold and especially windy though if I stayed close enough to the rock, I could only feel a cold breeze instead of the full force of the wind.

Nori was already sitting, his back leaning against the rock, his eyes staring unseeingly at the sky and the landscape. I imitated him and put the blanket around my shoulder before sitting next to him.

It only took me ten minutes, maybe fifteen, to shiver from the cold.

"Come here."

Nori's whisper startled me.

Feeling his arms around me startled me even more.

When I realized he was guiding me so that I would lean against his chest, between his legs, I felt my heart stop for a long minute.

I held my breath but was too astounded to resist.

He still had his own blanket that fell around his shoulders. Once I leant against him, he took mine and covered us both with it. I was suddenly in a warm cocoon.

Immediately after he did that I felt his arms encircling my waist. I couldn't help but tense and held my breath for a second. My heart was beating erratically as Nori held me close to him. He was so warm than after a few minutes I had forgotten everything about the cold. I was shivering for another reason.

He must have felt it because he let go of my waist to rub my arms kindly.

That didn't help.

That didn't help at all.

My whole body was tingling. My heart was beating wildly. My breath itched. And in my neck, where I could feel Nori's breath, my skin was just burning.

"Are you still cold?" He whispered in my ear.

I immediately bit my lower lip strongly.

That wasn't normal.

Those emotions, those feelings, they weren't normal. They weren't what I should feel for a family member. Right now I only wanted to do one thing. I felt the only way to ease the tingles and the low burning was to turn around in his arms.

Turn around and kiss him…

I wanted it.

This realization made me jolt slightly.

"Mizimul?"

Nori sounded worried by my silence. I cleared my throat and was about to talk but he was quicker.

"Maybe we should just go back." His worries didn't hide his disappointment completely.

"No. It's fine." I didn't want him to be back within the confines of the Halls just yet.

And maybe I didn't want to leave his arms just yet either. I took a slow, deep and calming breath and shifted slightly to lean comfortably against him. For a second I closed my eyes and just stayed silent.

"I'm fine. I was just a little cold." I whispered.

I felt him nod and he leant a bit forward, bringing his mouth incredibly close to my ear. At that instant I cursed him. He had no idea what he made me feel.

"Alright. Let me know if you get too cold."

I clenched my teeth and thought this might have been a bad idea. But then he brought his arms once more around me, holding me tightly against him. If it had been a bad idea, it was definitely my best bad idea ever.

We remained silent for quite a while.

The night was peaceful and up in the mountain it was pleasantly silent. There was nothing but the sound of the wind and the light of the stars.

It was magical.

I relished in the moment.

I was with Nori and I felt …

I felt better than I ever did.

Somehow I wasn't shocked to realize than I was with Nori when I felt like this.

Still I felt like I was back to square one. I knew what I felt for him was nothing like what I should feel for a family member. I didn't feel like this when Dori or Ori hugged me. I didn't feel like this either when Bofur would come close to me, and he was one of my closest friends, when he wasn't too annoying.

The little voice in the back of my head that I had pushed so far away before came back at the forefront of my mind. It whispered words of loves and showed me pictures that made me blush.

Could it be true though?

Nori was nothing like what I could have imagined for my future.

It was why I had been so adamant before that I wouldn't find anyone to share my life with in here. Well it wasn't the only reason, the main one being that I truly couldn't imagine a dwarf falling for a little human girl like me. But the second was that these dwarves, even though they had lots of qualities, were just too different from what I had known.

Like every little girl I had dreamt of love and romance. But in my mind the man I shared this love with always had been taller than me. He never had a beard, let alone a braided one. He never had long hair, let alone braided in complex hairdo. He never wore weapons, he never killed anyone. He was a far cry from what the dwarves were.

But were those reasons really why I couldn't love Nori?

I never had a precise picture of this imaginary man. But I knew I wanted him to be kind and caring. Yet I wanted him to be strong in minded. I wanted him to make me laugh and be there when I needed him most.

Thinking about it like that I wondered whether I was describing my ideal man or simply Nori.

So it could be true then.

I loved him. I knew I loved him already. But maybe, just maybe I loved him a bit more than I thought I did.

* * *

><p><strong>AN: Alright... it's the second time I'm trying to update this so I hope it works this time :)**

**First, I'm sorry if I'm a bit late this time with the update. I edited this chapter twice, because I wasn't happy with it, and I'm still not completely satisfied with the result. **

**Thanks everyone for the reviews/followers and favourites. It's really kind of you and it's really appreciated.**

**I hope you all enjoyed this chapter, it's probably the fluffiest I wrote so far. No one can complain about a lack of Nori anymore ^^ right? As for the other characters, I know I might not be writing about them as much as we would all want, but I'm honestly struggling already to try and give some space to Dori and Ori. I'm trying to allow all the characters their little time, but please understand I can't easily have all of them included in the story at all times. **

**I'm curious as to what you thought of this chapter. I know the title was a real giveaway that Amelia was starting to question herself :) I do hope you liked it.**

**I'm going to update another chapter this week, but it probably won't be before the weekend. **

**Thanks for your kind support :) and sorry for the problem with the updates...I honestly don't know what happened.**


	35. Where is Nori ?

**Everything belongs to JRR Tolkien, except for the OC and the plot**

* * *

><p>I was almost certain that I had a crush on Nori. A week ago, I had found that out while resting peacefully on his chest and gazing at the stars.<p>

That night was one I wouldn't forget about soon.

We had spent hours in silence. He was hugging me close to him and I had rested my head against his shoulder at some point. For a blissful moment I had forgotten everything about the King's orders, dwarves in general and the pain I still had in my leg. I could only hope that Nori had forgotten all this also. It was what I had wanted to do after all. I only wanted him to relax and forget for a moment he was being held prisoner in his own home.

At some point I had asked him why he didn't come here more often if it was so easy and if it could help him to feel better.

He hadn't answered immediately. Nori often took his time to think about his answers. It was one of his personality traits that I actually liked, though I couldn't explain why. It simply was a part of his peaceful and strong presence.

"Thorin wouldn't agree with me being here. No one except for the guards should come up in these parts." He said at first but I waited before talking, persuaded that there was something else. "And last time I came here, I had just found one of my father's beads and his ring. It is a place I come to when I'm…happy."

Unconsciously my hand skimmed over his forearm and found his. I squeezed lightly his fingers and looked ahead of me when I finally talked.

"I can't believe the King would be angry at you if you came here and only sat for a while. You can't stay confined Nori, I can see how it hurts you. If sneaking out to this place soothes you, then you shouldn't hesitate to come."

My murmurs were so low that I wasn't sure he heard me until he squeezed my hand too. My heart wasn't beating quickly right then. Thank Mahal it had finally calmed, though I still had this odd yet amazingly pleasing sensation rushing through my veins. Everything was right. Somehow, it felt simply right.

I inhaled slowly before continuing.

"And I'm really glad you would share such a place with me. I can see it is something important for you."

His arms tightened around me.

It felt as if he wanted me to come closer to his chest, even though it was physically impossible. I stayed silent and relished the feeling of my nerves tingling as Nori held me close.

"Thank you Umzam." He whispered softly.

His voice seemed strangled, yet it was still this low and deep rumble I loved to hear. I didn't react to the unknown word. I had no idea what the Khuzdul he used meant. I knew he called me Mizimul and I was fairly certain that this new word was yet another nickname. Another one I was sure he would never use in front of anyone else. I couldn't help but feel happy at the thought this was yet another small secret between just the two of us.

My heart clenched and skipped a few beats. I somehow found a way to snuggle closer to him and he didn't say anything, welcoming me and holding me tighter.

A bit later, we ate in silence the small snacks I had brought with me.

Everything seemed peaceful.

But soon enough I found my way back against Nori's chest and he once more held me close to him.

Unfortunately the sky lightened around that time and quickly, the sun started to rise in the east. It was time to go back home. It was time to put that night aside and resume ordinary life.

I was fairly certain at that moment that my feelings for Nori were stronger than they should be. I knew that if I let myself, I could easily fall completely in love with him. But I wasn't sure this would be a good idea. Danà had said that Nori wasn't interested with long term relationships, or at least with the idea of marrying someone. And I was still certain that no dwarf would find someone like me attractive, let alone fall in love with me.

No, there was simply no way in my mind that Nori would fall in love with me. I was already lucky to have him like me. I was already lucky to have his friendship. Yes I was lucky. I couldn't ask for more.

We walked back home quickly, though Nori carried me for at least half the way down there. When we arrived near the corridors leading to the main Halls, I grabbed Nori's arm and asked him to stop.

"Amelia, we have to go. I'm quite sure that Dori and Ori will already be awake. We'll have some explaining to do." He was frowning and I didn't feel like listening to an umpteenth speech about what was proper and what wasn't.

"That's why I was thinking we could quickly go to see if there're already some merchants in the market. If we come back with food for everyone, Dori and Ori will believe we just woke early." I explained calmly.

"You seem used to these kinds of things." Nori replied, tilting his head a bit and smirking.

"Not really, it was my first time sneaking out of home." I shrugged shaking my head a bit. "I'm feeling like a teenager right now." I couldn't help but smile happily at him.

When we arrived back home, Dori and Ori looked puzzled to see us both enter the kitchen from the living room's door. Thankfully I had decided to walk with my crutch and so it didn't seem too weird. Dori still looked at us with wide, surprised eyes and his mouth slightly agape. Ori didn't react much at first, and I soon realized that his eyes were half closed with sleep. The poor dwarf clearly wished to still be in his bed.

"Where were you?" Dori asked baffled.

"Did you wake up awhile ago?" I purposefully avoided answering his question, making my way to the table before taking a seat.

"Not too long." Ori yawned; clearly he was still half asleep.

"Amelia woke up early and I couldn't sleep. We decided to go see if there was some fresh bread in the market." Nori lied flawlessly. "We bought some honey cake too."

Ori smiled happily at those words, but Dori was suspicious for a second more before he decided to let it go and eat with us.

I felt bad for lying to Dori and Ori. I really did. But I knew that Dori at least wouldn't like the fact that both Nori and I sneaked out during the night. Dori would worry endlessly about the risks for me and the King's potential reaction if he found out.

I didn't like lying to Dori, but at that moment I felt it was necessary.

My guilt didn't matter much though when I realized that Nori was calmer and more relaxed than he had been in days. At least this little night out had helped him a bit. It had given him some more time. Now he just needed to find an occupation.

* * *

><p>It wasn't until a week later that he found one.<p>

During that week, life hadn't been much different for me. I spent my days mostly with Nori and my evenings with the three brothers and some of our friends, though Bofur was now very cautious of his words when he came. His eyes on the other hand never left me and I knew he was just waiting for me to slip and blurt out my secret.

What worried me most though, wasn't really to tell about the night I had spent in Nori's room. No. I was now worried because I wasn't certain that I wanted anyone to know about my little crush. I was still battling with the idea that I liked Nori that way. It felt both right and odd. Nori was supposed to be family, yet I appreciated him more than that. I really had no idea how to react, and I didn't want anyone to know about it until I had managed to put some order in my feelings.

So I had kept my mouth shut about it during that week and had acted as normally as possible.

The good news was that I could finally walk without feeling pain in my leg. The bad was that I had to rebuild my endurance from scratch now, and I had to train once again as if I hadn't before. I didn't really enjoy the fact that all these past training sessions were just done for seemingly nothing. Well, not really nothing entirely, it had allowed me to survive and protect Nori just long enough for help to arrive. We had been incredibly lucky. But we had survived. I could only be grateful for that.

Gloin had told me fighting off a wolf wasn't something they had prepared me for. He had apologized for it, terribly embarrassing me at the same time. Dwalin had added that I had done well and that it never was easy to fight wild animals. Both warriors had agreed to say that often it was easier to fight humans or orcs. I hadn't listened much at that moment though, I still had no idea what orcs really were, and I didn't really plan on fighting humans.

My thoughts were mostly grim, as I knew that I had to start training again.

One evening, Dwalin, Gloin and Bifur had come to say I shouldn't wait anymore before returning to the training grounds. Even Dori had agreed with them, while Nori hovered nearby, listening to the discussion attentively.

"You can't wait any longer lass." Gloin said before drinking from his large tankard and spilling ale on his beard.

"Aye. That'd be stupid." Dwalin agreed in a grunt.

The tall and bald dwarf had already eaten half of our honey cakes and seemed to still be hungry. At first I was concentrating on all the crumbs caught in his beard when I finally registered what exactly they had just said.

"I can barely walk." I frowned.

"Still, you should train again." Gloin gulped what was left of his ale before burping loudly and adding. "I'll be waiting for you tomorrow morning."

"But Gloin…" I really wasn't sure this would be a good idea.

My leg was still really painful when I used it for long walks. I couldn't picture myself running laps any time soon. I really didn't want to do it.

"You should listen to them Amelia." Dori softly intervened. "It's not good for you to stay idle. You'll lose all the strength you gained."

Idle? What did he mean idle? I spent all my days knitting or whittling or listening to Nori. I had even started to cook and clean again. My days were quite full with various activities. I was about to protest when Nori decided to join in the conversation. Until then he had been standing in a corner, smoking and lazily blowing rings of smokes to the ceiling.

"I'll train her." He simply said.

He hadn't spoken loudly, but everyone heard clearly his calm statement.

"You?" Dwalin snorted in disbelief. "You'll train her?"

Nori's eyes went to stare at Dwalin before he looked back at the fire.

"Aye. I'll do it."

I exchanged a glance with Dori. I could see he was uncertain about it all. Still, there was undeniably hope in his kind blue eyes too. Both of us clearly thought the exact same thing; this might just be the perfect opportunity to occupy Nori's mind while he was stuck in the Halls. Besides, I remembered the promise he had made to help me. That convinced me and I now agreed to train again, as long as it helped Nori. All the thoughts of eventual pain seemed to have evaporated from my head. Now I was motivated.

Gloin was about to protest when I cut in.

"It's true, you promised to help me. Alright then. We start tomorrow?"

Nori's eyes met mine for a short instant before he nodded and looked away again. After we both agreed and Dori joyously changed the topic, Gloin and Dwalin truly couldn't say anything anymore.

That afternoon, it was decided that Nori would be the one in charge of my training. Dwalin, Gloin and Bifur would only be helping if Nori asked them. Nori would be following me to the training grounds every morning and would supervise my training.

The following day, I woke up early and felt oddly refreshed. I was happy at the thought of training. Well, of training with Nori that is. I was eager to start.

One would think that kind and caring Nori would be an amazing trainer.

Well, he wasn't.

Nori was worse than Dwalin, Gloin and Bifur put together.

He didn't hurt me. I could trust him not to and I was far from starting the fights again. But he was forcing me to run laps and when I grew tired he would allow me to sit only to give me some other tasks to do.

The first day he allowed me to sit on a bench and then left me alone for a few minutes. When he came back he held a huge war hammer similar to the one Bofur used in battle. He gently placed it on my thighs, careful not to hurt me, and then smirked when I sent him a questioning glance.

"Lift it." He ordered.

I blinked before blindly obeying.

The hammer was heavy. I knew that much simply because it pressed against my thighs almost painfully. But when I tried to lift it with both my hands I understood how heavy it actually was.

How could anyone lift it with one hand, let alone use it in battle?

I was once more impressed by the dwarves' strength.

I barely moved the thing one inch before I almost let it fall on my thighs. Hadn't it been for Nori grabbing it the moment I let go, I would have gained some bruises.

"Stand up." Nori said before handing me the hammer once more. "Don't let it fall."

"Nori I can't, it's too heavy." I complained.

I was looking at him with wide eyes. I couldn't believe he would actually ask me to do something so ridiculous. The thing was impossible for me to hold.

"Yes, and that's exactly why you need to hold it and put some muscles in your arms. You have not enough strength." He calmly stated, shrugging carelessly.

"I thought I should concentrate on speed and dodging instead of fighting and blocking." I retorted.

"Yes, you should." He shrugged again before continuing. "It doesn't mean you have to be as weak as a human's newborn child."

As I was about to protest loudly, he stepped closer and whispered so only I could hear. The tone of his voice changed entirely, from his stern and matter-of-fact trainer's voice, to his usual, kind rumble.

"Mizimul, I watched you almost die in front of my eyes. It won't happen ever again. I understand I can't always protect you, but I will train you properly."

At first I was slightly shocked and I didn't react. After a few seconds, I registered his words and I nodded, a bit sad after all. How could I disagree with him when he was looking at me like this? Damn, it wasn't fair. I couldn't say no to him when his eyes shone with worry and care.

"Alright" I muttered in answer, looking down.

"And that means a lot of work on your part. I won't let you go out without me anymore if you can't learn properly what I intend to teach you."

And the nod I gave at that moment was just the starting point of a new kind of training hell.

At first, if I wasn't running, I was trying to build some muscles in my upper body. After a few weeks, if I wasn't doing that Nori was trying to heighten my reflexes. That consisted in him throwing various objects at me as I had to dodge them, or worse…catch them all. Even if I wasn't running, Nori didn't let me have long pauses and little by little I found back some endurance again.

I didn't know how many weeks passed like this with my days entirely occupied by Nori's hellish training.

Dori clearly didn't know what to think. On one hand he was happy and relieved to see that Nori wasn't too restless anymore; he didn't have the time to be restless… he was too occupied with my training. On the other hand the oldest brother was worried to see me fall asleep so early in the evenings.

For my part I hated Nori. Really. It was a nightmare to train with him. Nothing seemed good enough. If I managed to dodge all the projectiles he threw at me but couldn't catch them afterwards it wasn't good enough. If I could run without being breathless but then didn't have enough energy to lift this stupid hammer, it wasn't good enough. Even when I managed to do everything he asked, it still wasn't good enough.

It was probably around that moment that I realized how deeply scared Nori had been when I had fought the wolf in front of him. It was rather obvious to me now that this crazy training was as much for me as it was for him. He needed to personally know I was strong and able to go out again. He didn't trust the others with me…or so I liked to believe.

It was odd to feel that I loved and hated him so much at the same time.

But I was entirely too tired in the evenings to even start to think about my feelings.

I knew I loved him. I knew I hated him. That was enough for now.

I needed to concentrate, to focus on my training. For me. For Nori. For Dori and Ori too.

As the days went by, Nori grew even more demanding during training sessions. He would barely let me take any rest. It was to the point where I dreamt about running laps instead of being forced into a variety of exhausting exercises.

Then one day, as Nori was throwing small balls at me and I was trying to dodge them all, something snapped.

Literally snapped.

I yelped and instinctively brought my hands to my chest, eyes wide and forgetting immediately about Nori's training. I was just starting to realize one of my bra's straps had broken when I received one of those damn wooden balls on the shoulder.

I cursed and glared at Nori who was frowning at me. Before he could say anything though, I was running away. I clearly startled him with my reaction as he didn't even try to follow me. I dashed towards the public baths, my arms still oddly crossed over my chest, as they were slightly closer than home.

I truly hoped it was nothing and that I would be able to wear my bra once more. I knew it was already overused, but I really couldn't do without it. It wasn't as if my breasts were the biggest ever seen, but they were heavy enough for it to be uncomfortable if I didn't wear some kind of support.

As I entered the room I startled violently.

Several dwarvish women looked up at me with curiosity and I felt myself blush. I wasn't usually coming at such hours so I was often alone. It felt odd to see so many women around. I was about to retreat and make my way to my room when a voice halted me.

"Amelia? What's going on?"

"D…Danà?" I stammered, surprised and embarrassed.

She stepped out of the group of women. I had trouble to recognize her at first. Her hair and beard weren't braided yet and were still wet. It was a bit strange to see her without the intricate braids and numerous beads.

"What happened? Weren't you training?" She walked closer so that our discussion could be slightly more private.

"It's…well it's nothing important." I hesitated for a minute before breathing out. "It's my bra. I think it broke."

"Your bra? You're talking about this weird thing around your chest? I told you already you should use proper bindings. That thing you wear is probably most uncomfortable." She frowned.

She was using her maternal tone while placing her hands on my shoulders and guiding me to a private area.

"I don't know how to use those stuffs you roll yourself in." I retorted slightly petulantly.

"And I'm here to show you. Now, strip while I go gather some clean bindings for you."

I opened my mouth to protest but she had already left me alone. Sighing, I removed my thin leather jacket, my tunic and my undershirt before finally removing my bra. It had properly snapped. I looked at it forlornly. I could probably repair it, it wouldn't be that difficult. Still, I wondered what the point would be. One bra wouldn't last a lifetime. It was inevitable that at some point I would have to stop wearing it. Now was as good a time as any.

Still, I felt stupidly sad because of it.

It was one of my last reminders that I had been born in another world. I didn't want to throw it away. As useless as it was, I would keep it with my old jeans and jumper.

When Danà came back, she immediately glanced disapprovingly at my skin; the overused bra had irritated it badly, especially on my shoulders. But Danà was a kind woman, and she probably knew why I had been so stubborn about it. Wordlessly, she started to place the bindings around my chest.

It was weird.

Truly weird.

I couldn't help but be nervous at the thought the bindings would somehow unbind themselves while I walked. Still having no choices, I started to use them every day. I had to admit it was rather comfortable when I trained. My breasts didn't hinder my moves as much as they had before.

I never told Nori what had happened that day. Even though he asked why I had run away and disappeared, I never answered.

It would have been too embarrassing.

* * *

><p>Time passed without me taking much notice of it until one day, Nori decided we should try to let me spar against Bifur. Dwalin and Gloin had kept an eye on my training all along and agreed with the thief. For the first time in months, I felt my fingers close around the long wooden staff I had used to fight the wolf. Letting my fingers slid against the soft wood, I was surprised by the feeling that grew in me at that moment. It was as if I was glad to see my staff again. Shaking my head, I brushed it off and quickly strode towards the dwarves who were waiting for me. Now wasn't the time to think about anything else than the spar.<p>

"Are you ready Amelia?" Nori asked me and I simply nodded.

Bifur grunted something and took a wooden staff before huffing some other words I didn't understand.

"Bifur said he'll try to go slowly. It's been awhile since your last spar." Gloin translated for me.

I swallowed thickly and waited for the dwarves to leave Bifur and me alone in the middle of the grounds.

After the first few seconds of the fight I knew something was different.

Either Bifur was going really easy against me, or Nori's training had been really, really efficient. I dodged with ease. Even when I deflected his attacks and parried them with my staff, my arms didn't shake like they used to before.

After several minutes, Bifur obviously started to grow more serious. In all but a minute I had to jump aside, dodge, crouch and side step without having any time to catch my breath or even think. I kept this insane rhythm for maybe another minute before finally, Bifur's staff caught me unaware in the stomach.

The shock expulsed all the air from my lungs and I fell to the floor in a heap, coughing loudly and gasping to catch some air.

Immediately I was surrounded by dwarves who were asking me whether I needed to see Oin. I dismissed them with a wave of my hand. After a few minutes I only felt a dull ache in my stomach but was able to breathe normally. The dwarves were already commenting the spar. Bifur was the first to talk, well grunt, and Dwalin translated.

"He said you are doing better."

Well, it was nice of him to say so, though I truly didn't feel like it right this instant.

"That was easy to notice." Gloin laughed. "You're quicker now and obviously stronger."

Nori didn't say a word. He observed me attentively until I smiled to let him know I was as fine as could be. He just nodded while the others were still talking.

"She lasted almost ten minutes for her first spar." Dwalin commented thoughtfully.

"Against Bifur too, that's not bad." Gloin added. "Your method is quite efficient lad." He said to Nori who simply shrugged.

"You alright there lass?" Dwalin asked as I was still sitting on the floor.

All the dwarves looked at me and I sighed. I rubbed my stomach with one hand and took a deep breath.

"Yeah…I guess."

Dwalin nodded approvingly while Gloin smiled at me. Nori still hadn't reacted much and I had no idea what it could mean. Was he disappointed? I didn't have the time to ponder on this as Dwalin spoke in his gruff voice.

"Good. Stand up. You're fighting against me now."

"Ehh?"

My eyes widened and I couldn't believe it. He had to be joking. There was no way I would be able to fight against Dwalin right now. I looked desperately at Nori who actually seemed to ponder on it. When he nodded at Dwalin and helped me back to my feet I knew I didn't have any choice in the matter. These dwarves would do whatever they wanted anyway.

Once more as I sparred against Dwalin I felt the difference. They were right, I was faster and Nori's little game of throwing things at me had apparently improved my reflexes too. I could feel Dwalin becoming more serious as the minutes ticked by. At some point I made a mistake, which was bound to happen anyway, and he won the spar, which didn't surprise anyone.

As soon as this one was over, I was exhausted and facing Gloin who happily tried to hit me with the wooden swords. All in all I did my best but it just wasn't enough and at some point I fell to the floor and just didn't have any strength left in me to stand back up.

Nori was smirking when he strode to my side. He crouched and before he could ask anything I whizzed at him between two gasps for air.

"I hate you."

The bloody thief's smirk grew wider and he winked at me.

I could have hit him right now and then had I had enough strength left in my arms. He didn't seem fazed at all and his smirk grew a bit wider. How could I both love and hate this dwarf so much at this moment? His smirk and the damn twinkle in his eyes would be my death one day.

"You did really good Mizimul." He whispered before the other dwarves arrived.

"I think that should be enough for today lad. Our missy is slightly tired." Gloin laughed heartily.

I glared at him which made him laugh all the more.

"Humans really have low endurance." Dwalin grunted and I turned my glare to him.

He just shrugged as Bifur started to talk with him. Soon Dwalin, Bifur and Gloin were grunting and shouting in Khuzdul. I glanced at Nori, expecting him to translate what was going on. He simply shrugged and summarized.

"They're arguing about whether or not humans have good endurance."

I rolled my eyes and winced when I tried to sit up on my own. My body was aching everywhere already. My arms and legs were even slightly trembling. Pulling a face I managed to sit but only with Nori's help. His hand started to rub soothing circles on my back as he looked at me, still smirking, though there was a bit of concern in his eyes.

"Are you alright?" He dared ask me.

"Do I look alright?" I huffed annoyed.

He frowned and I saw a flash of guilt and regret pass in his eyes before he spoke.

"Do you want to go to the healing wards?"

I felt bad for making him feel guilty. And that annoyed me a bit. I couldn't even pout without feeling bad. I was insane. I just couldn't help it though; I had to reassure him in some ways. After all, he did all this for me and my safety only.

"No need. I have everything I need home." I replied tiredly.

I couldn't stand by myself and Nori was kind enough to help me. All my anger seemed to melt away when I found myself pressed against his chest after I stumbled into him. His arms were encircling my waist and helped me stay upright.

"Can you walk back?" He wondered worriedly.

"I might need a little help." I whispered against his chest.

A little help ended up being quite a lot of help. In the end, Nori carried me on his back. I suddenly remembered the time we spent together before he transformed into the hellish trainer I was seeing every day.

He was walking in silence and I closed my eyes. At that moment, all my hate for Nori the trainer was gone and little by little my other feelings were awakening. I missed our silly banters and our closeness. Even though I saw him every day, it was different. There were always people around us now. He was so intent in training me too.

I sighed.

This situation was a bit depressing.

Nori didn't seem to miss those little moments at all though. In my mind, this meant he cared for me like someone would care for a family member or friend. He enjoyed spending some time with me, but not overly so. He clearly didn't enjoy spending time alone with me so much, seeing as he didn't try to be alone with me at all.

Nowadays we were always surrounded by dwarves.

The long hours spent reading, the peaceful moments when he taught me to whittle, everything seemed forgotten. He never even mentioned that night we had spent up there in the mountain. I had thought about it so much. When I was alone in the dark at night, I could almost feel his arms around my waist and his warm breath against the skin of my neck. I hadn't forgotten that night. How could I? I had realized then that I loved him more than I thought. I had found out I could easily fall in love with him.

But soon after we had come back, Nori had transformed into this stern trainer.

I missed him. I missed him terribly.

It was strange to say that when I actually saw him all day long.

"Amelia, are you alright?" He asked worriedly.

I opened my eyes and realized we were home and I hadn't realized it. Slowly I let him lower me to the ground and I leant against the wall for a second. Once we passed the threshold, I realized that Dori and Ori were still working and it was rather early in the afternoon.

Nori closed the door behind us and immediately strode to stay by my side. I could tell he was ready to catch me if I fell or stumbled. Worry was now fairly obvious on his face. I wondered whether he was hiding it while we were on the training ground, but before I could think a bit more, he spoke hurriedly.

"Mizimul, are you hurt?"

I rolled my eyes but couldn't stop the smile that pulled my lips at hearing him call me 'Mizimul'. When I saw how concerned he was becoming I kindly answered.

"I'm fine Nori. Just…really tired and maybe a bit sore."

He nodded, still observing me attentively, and I limped, grimacing, to my armchair.

"You're hurt. Is it your leg?" He quickly said.

I rolled my eyes but couldn't stop the small smile that tugged at my lips.

"Yes my leg hurts a bit, but as I said, it's just soreness. It's really nothing Nori, stop worrying."

I sighed contentedly when I fell in the comfortable chair and I closed my eyes for a second. I knew somehow that Nori was still there. I opened my eyes again and met his grey ones. He was concerned, but there seemed to be something else well hidden. Something I had seen several times already but couldn't name.

I breathed in and out slowly to calm my heartbeat and I smiled at him.

"Would you mind reading for me? It seems like you haven't for ages."

I couldn't believe I was actually feeling nervous when I asked him that. It truly wasn't anything big. I was just asking him to read me a book. Yet I felt as if I was saying something incredibly awkward. My heart was once more pounding loudly against my ribs as I waited for his answer.

Nori stood silent. His gaze was still locked with mine until he slowly nodded.

"What do you want me to read Mizimul?" He turned to go towards shelves Ori had insisted we stocked with books in the living room several weeks ago.

"Anything, I just want to listen to you." I said without thinking.

I saw him falter a bit before he acted as if nothing had happened.

For my part I felt the heat that indicated I was blushing. It was true though, I didn't care much about a story right now, I just wanted to spend time with him and listen to his voice.

He grabbed a small book and came back to sit facing me. As he started to read I let my eyes roam over his face. I barely paid any attention to the story, it was one we had read already. No, I was simply relishing the feeling of peace and bliss that came to me during this moment. I was with my Nori once more. The evil trainer was far from my mind, he was back there, in the training grounds. Here, facing me was my Nori. The one who had a kind and rumbling voice. He would patiently read and translate stories for me, not showing any sign of annoyance as he was forced to sit there with me.

Here in the living room was my Nori, the one I loved so much.

I didn't even try to hide my smile. I was happy.

He read until the door opened and let Dori and Ori in. The two other brothers greeted us warmly before Dori decided now was a good time to have some chamomile tea. Nori and Ori decided to drink ale, obviously, and I waited until Dori brought me back a steaming cup. Meanwhile Nori and Ori were arguing loudly over which barrel to open first. Ori wanted to drink the dark brown ale, while Nori maintained they should start with another one.

I tuned them out completely, especially when I saw that Dori wanted to talk to me.

"Are you alright? You seem tired." He said at first.

I smiled. It didn't bother me that Dori was such a mother hen. It was a part of him and I accepted it. It was quite nice too, to know that he would always be there, kind and caring. Everything was normal, and right now this simple fact was just amazing.

"That's because I am tired Dori. Nori is really a stern trainer and today I had to spar against Bifur, Dwalin and Gloin. I'm exhausted." I answered with the smile still present on my face.

"How did it go?"

"Well I think. Apparently, Nori is more annoying than Dwalin and Gloin together, but he's a good teacher."

Dori nodded pensively before he whispered.

"Thanks to you he has something to occupy his mind. He doesn't want you to get hurt again. It forces him to focus on your training. It's a good thing."

"I'm glad I can be of use." I replied honestly. "Though, my muscles don't agree." I added teasingly.

Dori chuckled as Nori and Ori arrived back, having finally decided to each open the barrel they wanted.

"What's going on?" Ori wondered while sitting.

"Amelia was telling me about her training." He replied before looking at Nori. "You let her spar with the three of them?"

"She did well. Bifur was impressed."

I smiled widely at that. I understood now that impressing Bifur was better than receiving compliments. The old warrior might have lost a part of his mind on the battlefield, but if there was anything left in there, besides his amazing abilities in whittling and carving, that was the knowledge to fight. Watching Bifur spar was incredible. Sparing with him was a nightmare. I was a bit proud of my achievement. After all I had managed to last more this time than the previous one.

My leg was hurting a bit as a result to the strain I had put myself under, but I didn't mind much. I knew the injury had healed well awhile ago. Today's pain wasn't worrisome. Nothing right now could make me feel bad.

"If you're doing so well, then maybe you'll learn to use daggers next." Ori provided encouragingly.

It was sweet of him to be so interested in my training. I knew he didn't care much for fights. He knew how to defend himself and how to fight, like any dwarf would obviously, but he was content with only using his slingshot. He was a scholar, not a warrior. Still, he was highly supportive and that only made me love him more. The thought crossed my mind once again, that I had been truly lucky to meet those three brothers. I didn't think I could have been quite so happy with any others.

"I'm not too sure it's such a good idea for you to learn how to use daggers." Nori commented forcing me back to focus on the discussion.

"Why?" I couldn't help but ask, shocked by his words.

"Because the whole point is to teach you how to defend yourself. You can do that with a staff, it's a long weapon, it'll allow you to keep the enemies at bay and avoid injuries. With daggers you move to closer to them. There's more risk." Nori explained seriously.

"And learning how to use twin blades isn't easy. Not anyone can do it." Dori added. "If you learn to use one dagger, it won't help you much. Only when it's used in a pair is it truly interesting."

Nori nodded, highlighting that for once he completely agreed with his brother. It reminded me that the thief was supposed to be among the best users of twin daggers. Even Fili had once told me that Nori had the reputation to be deadly with the two blades in hands.

"So what? You want me to only use the staff?" I asked, slightly annoyed that they would tell me that now.

"Maybe she could learn how to use a spear?" Ori provided then, though I knew it wasn't his area of expertise, far from it.

"And what if I lose it or it breaks? Don't you think I need to learn how to defend myself with some sort of…what is it called…" I hesitated before forgetting about finding the right word. "Well, a smaller weapon too?"

It wouldn't make any sense to let me learn only how to use a staff or spear. I wasn't stupid. I knew those were rather cumbersome weapons. It might be really useful in some places, but it hindered someone's move in others.

"She's right. She needs to learn how to use a blade too." Dori muttered, frowning.

"Then I'll try to see whether you can use twin daggers." Nori sighed, apparently not overly pleased with the situation.

A short while later, Dori stood up to start preparing the evening meal, claiming I was obviously too tired to do it. When I tried to protest he forced Ori to follow and help him. I couldn't help but chuckle at the annoyed pout Ori had when he followed his older brother. All the while, the youngest kept muttering that he was an adult and he shouldn't have to obey his brother anymore. Obviously, his rant fell in deaf ears.

Once more alone with Nori I glanced at him before whispering lowly.

"Thank you for reading earlier." My voice became almost inaudible when I shyly added. "I missed it. I enjoy those moments."

At first he said nothing. He didn't even look at me. His eyes were riveted to the hearth were a small fire was burning. Hadn't I paid attention to him, I wouldn't have realized he spoke nor heard his answer.

"I do too Mizimul."

I smiled softly and leant back in my chair. These four words were enough to make me happy for the rest of the day, maybe even tomorrow.

I felt stupidly giddy.

But Nori had just said he enjoyed being with me and that was all that mattered. He enjoyed being with me. Even if it was only because he saw me as a sister or a friend, it still meant he appreciated my presence, that he appreciated me. How could I not be happy after hearing such a thing?

Nori didn't look at me but as I glimpsed at him I saw a soft smile on his lips. It was barely there, and really well hidden by his beard, but it was there. Nori was smiling kindly as he stared unseeingly at the flames.

My evening couldn't get any better.

That night, as I slowly dozed off, I knew a smile was still tugging the corners of my lips.

The following day, my training with weapons started.

* * *

><p>It had been three weeks since I started to train with twin daggers, and it wasn't going well to say the least.<p>

I was using two wooden daggers to train and even though I tried my hardest to follow advises and instructions given by Nori and the other dwarves, I just couldn't fight with the both of them.

It was rather obvious that I favoured one hand at each time. The odd thing though, was that I didn't always favour the same. I apparently could use both relatively well, but not at the same time. When I would use the right one, my left hand would often stay pitifully motionless in front of my chest. When I would then try to concentrate and use the left one, my right one would hang uselessly on my side.

Nori was becoming crazy because of this.

The only good thing was that I wasn't really that bad with them. Even though I had trouble to use both daggers simultaneously, I was still rather quick on my feet and the months of training had allowed me to gain speed and good reflexes. I was better at defending myself. Still I couldn't seem to find it in myself to riposte and attack. That last issue didn't concern the dwarves much though. They didn't want me to fight, they wanted me to be able to defend myself until one of them could finish off his enemy and come to my help.

This way of thinking had many flaws, I knew it, but I didn't voice my doubts. If I pointed out that one day I might be alone out there, they would all start shouting and yelling in protest. If I were honest though, I would admit that I was fine with it. I didn't want to kill anyone anymore. It had been hard already to move past my first and only murder. I didn't want to start it all again.

I had been able to somehow put it past me, mostly thanks to this intense training and all the issues with Nori. My brain and being had been so focused on many other things that I just didn't have the will to wallow in my self-inflicted pain.

I had killed a man.

I was a murderer.

Well, that was done. I knew I would have done it even if I had the time to think about the consequences.

At some point maybe I had realized that I wasn't becoming a monster. I wasn't a vile being. I was just living in a harsh and unforgiving world. If I wanted to live by my old world's ethics, moral and philosophy, I would probably have died. Or some of my friends would have.

I wanted to live, to survive? Then I had to deal with the fact that yes, here it was fine to kill someone who had wronged you. Yes it was fine to do everything you could, no matter the casualties, if it meant protecting your kin. Dwarves were my kin. I would do my best to help them.

That was it.

Still, it didn't mean that I was ready to go on a killing spree and would be happy with it.

For months now my mind had almost been entirely focused on my training. A major part of me was really serious about it. I simply knew it was necessary. But another, small part of me was constantly focused on Nori. And recently this part was worried. Really worried.

Nori had been fine for a while, training me was an occupation for him and he was intent on doing it properly. Little by little I saw Dori and Ori start to believe the façade Nori was putting. Because it was only that, a façade. After weeks spent with him reading and peacefully spending time together, and several months spent at his side mostly training, I could tell he wasn't feeling well.

I couldn't really explain it, but I could feel it.

He was joking with the others, talking and listening, smoking and drinking like he always did, but something felt off. His eyes didn't seem to shine with mischief as they once did. His smirk seemed forced and unnatural.

But most of all I seemed to be the only one to see how fidgety he had become. Even when we sat all together around the hearth in the evenings, Nori wouldn't stop moving. Even if it was only slightly he would cross his legs only to uncross them seconds later, he would tap his feet lightly on the floor or other little movements similar to those. Movements I knew he never used to make before.

It only told me that even though he was good at hiding it, Nori was really far from feeling alright.

The major problem was that I had no idea who I could talk to about it.

I didn't want to worry Dori. The fact that his brother was maybe days away from making a major mistake would only trouble him. Ori would be more anxious probably than Dori and wouldn't be of much help.

I was shocked though to be the only one who realized it.

Didn't those dwarves open their eyes once in awhile?

I could understand why Dori and Ori would somehow choose not to see it, though unconsciously. This whole story had been rather hard to deal with for Ori and he had been nervous and anxious for weeks at first. I was quite certain they had seen their brother's nervousness but decided not to speak about it.

I could relate to that.

After all I hadn't spoken with Nori about his growing restlessness.

Now that I thought about it, it probably was something close to a miracle that Nori hadn't sneaked out already. I hadn't tried to go out with him again after our only night spent outside. I didn't think it would have been a good idea for me. I was already feeling too much for this dwarf and one sided feelings were just a pain. I truly didn't want to embarrass myself or break the balance in our relationship. I had too much to lose. I couldn't lose Nori.

Still, even though I somehow lacked the courage to face Nori now, I couldn't let him suffer quite so visibly. I had to try and do something.

And if I couldn't speak with Dori and Ori about it, I felt that the only other person who could potentially help me was my other guardian.

So that afternoon, after my training session, I ended up walking through many corridors, map in hand. It wasn't hard to find Balin's office on the map. It was another matter altogether to go there in reality. I had to turn countless time and change from one corridor to another in the maze that was Thorin's Halls in order to finally face the wooden door.

I knocked lightly on it until I heard a well known voice shouting from the other side. I pushed the door and was surprised to see even more parchments surrounding my kind guardian than before. The dwarf was completely disappearing under papers.

"Amelia." His eyebrows rose to his hairline in surprise. "What are you doing here my dear? Is something the matter?"

He stood up and walked closer to me as he spoke until he faced me. Smiling softly I answered.

"Hello Balin. I'm fine."

As I spoke, we had both placed our hands on the other's shoulders and we lightly touched our foreheads.

I had found out about this custom only recently when Dwalin had come back from a mission and I had been there to witness his and Balin's greetings. I had been shocked to say the least when I saw them violently hit their foreheads. Afterwards they had explained how this was an old dwarvish greeting. Apparently it wasn't necessarily violent and since they had explained this I actually realized how often I saw dwarves touch each other foreheads by way of farewell or welcome.

And since that day I had the habit to greet Balin that way. I didn't dare do it with Dwalin though, as this gesture was only done between kin. I didn't hesitate with Balin and last time Dori had left for a short trip I had welcomed him this way, which had apparently pleased everyone.

They had all looked at me as if they were proud of some impressive prowess.

Anyway, after a few seconds both Balin and I took a step back as he smiled kindly at me.

"I'm always glad to see you my dear, but why did you come today?"

"First, don't worry. As I told you I'm fine." I smiled some more in answer to his.

Balin wasn't one to worry quite so much as Dori did. He was calm and I would say wise too. He was old though still young by dwarvish standards. I knew he had lived in Erebor and through the long exile. But instead of being hardened and angry, he was still a very kind and thoughtful dwarf.

"How is your training going?" He enquired while gesturing for me to sit.

I didn't hesitate and sighed before answering.

"It's tiring. Nori is really stern about it. I still can't fight with both hands at the same time." I was rather annoyed by this actually and Balin obviously realized it.

"Don't worry." He patted my shoulder before sitting in a seat facing mine. "It will take time but you put efforts in it, it will pay."

"I hope so, otherwise I'm never going to leave this place." I muttered.

Balin chuckled at that and I couldn't help but smile some more.

"Aye, Dori and Nori won't let you out if they're not entirely certain you won't risk much."

"Don't act as if you wouldn't agree with them." I couldn't help but retort, crossing my arms over my chest.

At that he shook his head before replying in a calm and caring voice.

"You scared us too much already Amelia. Surely you understand…"

I raised my hand and smiled to stop him.

"I know Balin, I know. I didn't come here to talk about that anyway. Well, not entirely."

Immediately I saw a change in him. He sat a bit straighter and looked at me seriously. I knew I had all his attention as he spoke.

"What is the matter then?" He frowned, concentrating on my words.

"I want to talk about Nori."

He seemed oddly surprised at that. He first stammered unintelligible words while looking at me with wide eyes, before he took a slow breath and finally cleared his throat to speak clearly.

"My dear, I'm not sure I'm the one you should talk with. Probably Dís or Danà would advise you more appropriately."

I stared at him.

I had no idea what he was talking about or how he would link me needing to talk about Nori to Danà and Dís. Balin looked oddly nervous right then, which struck me as really odd. I had never seen my second guardian quite so uneasy.

I frowned and shook my head.

"No. Dís and Danà won't be able to do anything about it." I said and as he opened his mouth I spoke quickly. "I understand that the King ordered for him to stay within the Halls, but surely you could try and talk with him."

That apparently surprised him some more. He opened and closed his mouth a few times before he shook his head and managed to talk.

"What exactly are you talking about my dear?"

I blinked, clearly not understanding why he didn't follow my trail of thoughts. It seemed rather obvious to me.

"Well, Nori hasn't disobeyed the King's orders, but he's getting really restless Balin. I'm quite sure he'll soon sneak out or leave the halls."

I saw Balin's eyes widened a bit at first before he nodded pensively. He didn't seem nervous anymore. He scratched his ear as he seemed deeply lost in his thoughts and I remained silent, waiting for him to speak.

"It has been a long time, hasn't it?" He muttered softly.

"Almost five months." I added to point out how long it had been.

"And what would you have me do then girl? Send him back out so he could steal again?" A deep, rumbling voice said from behind me.

I startled violently as I hadn't expected anyone to come in Balin's office. Quickly I stood and turned to find myself face to face with the King. During a few seconds, I felt frozen. Then, my brain started to work faster than ever and I straightened my back to face the King properly as he spoke.

"Nori is my kin. I knew his father well. I don't see why I should let him go back to his despicable ways." The King harshly said while striding in and closing the door behind him.

"Don't you trust him?" I couldn't help but ask.

His cold blue eyes stared at me as he seemed to ponder on his answer.

"I did, once. But how could I trust him now?"

I struggled not to pull a face. That was a rather honest and blunt answer and I'm sure Nori would have been hurt by the words.

"His behaviour in these past months should be a proof that he can be trusted." I replied calmly.

"Should it?"

His blue eyes were focused on me, making me uneasy. Still, I tried my best not to squirm under the icy gaze. Thankfully, my guardian came to my rescue.

"Thorin, he remained within the halls just like you asked." Balin commented. "Nori never stayed here for such a long period of time before."

"I know Nori is a thief, but has he ever stolen anything from a dwarf of these halls?" I asked, already knowing the answer. "I'm not trying to say his actions are honourable, but maybe you don't know everything behind them. Maybe he has reasons."

His sharp gaze didn't leave me for a second and I felt as if I was being judged.

"And you know them? What does Nori hide then?"

I swallowed thickly. Thanks to my big mouth, two more dwarves now knew that Nori had a secret. A secret I was apparently the only one to know about. I inhaled deeply, trying to steal my nerves.

"That secret is his to reveal." I replied coldly. "But you can't ignore the fact that he has followed your orders for the past months."

"So what? I'm repeating myself girl, but what would you have me do then? Send him back outside?"

"You can do that. Show you trust him, send him on a mission." I replied with a soft tone.

"And what if he sneaks away?"

"He won't. He won't but if that eases your mind, send someone else with him." I insisted.

I saw my words were interesting him. I knew the King was a weird, incomprehensible person, but he was honourable and I liked to think he was fair too. It wouldn't solve the situation completely, but sending Nori on a mission would help him…hopefully.

I knew it wouldn't allow him to look for his father's necklace anymore, but at least he won't be stuck in the halls.

"Thorin, you should think about it. I believe Amelia is right with this matter." Balin added once more. "Nori might be a thief, but he always was loyal to you."

The King observed me in silence for awhile. His presence was slightly oppressive but I didn't lower my gaze. I didn't try to offend him either. I was perfectly calm. I knew I was right.

"And we do need some more dwarves for mercenary and trading missions." Balin added.

"Alright." The King raised one hand before pointing one finger at me. "You are going with him. If he sneaks away, you'll be responsible."

"Thorin!" Balin started to protest as I felt knots in my stomach.

"No Balin. She's talking in his name, and she should have responsibilities too." The King dismissed his old friend's concerns with a wave of his hand.

"It's fine. I trust Nori completely. I know he won't disappoint you." I replied calmly.

"Good for you." The King shrugged.

"Still, Thorin. I can't send only Nori and Amelia. She's not strong enough yet. What if they're attacked on the way?"

"Then add a third dwarf if you want to." The King said before turning towards the shelves and grabbing a large dusty tome.

He then simply nodded at Balin, glanced at me and left.

Balin and I remained silent for several long seconds before the old and kind dwarf sighed and spoke.

"I know you trust Nori my dear, but are you sure he won't leave as soon as you're in the wilds?"

"I know he won't. If he is given a mission he will do it. I think… I hope he'll be simply glad to be out of the Halls." I answered, trying my best to sound convincing.

"I hope you're right."

I sighed and unconsciously started to play with one of the beads in my first braid. I really thought that it would help Nori. He would be simply glad to go out. Right? I bit my lower lip, it wasn't the right time to start having doubts. It was too late now. I hadn't planned anything much when I first arrived in Balin's office. The King's presence had forced my hand though, and now I had to deal with the potential consequences. Still, I had been honest, I trusted Nori completely.

Balin kindly patted my shoulder before going back behind his desk.

"Now, let's see what mission I could send you to."

"And we have to find a third dwarf to accompany us." I reminded him. "I guess Dori is out of the question?"

"Dori needs to go to a city south of Lunetown. He won't be able to go with you." Balin answered while looking at his list of missions. "I think you could go to Archet. It's a relatively simple mission and it's not too far either."

I nodded. I really didn't care much about what we would do or where we would go.

"As for the third dwarf…" Balin rummaged through his parchments and sighed. "There's no one experienced. But you could go with Fili. It'd be good for the lad. Thorin has been reluctant to send him anywhere after Gorm and all those attacks on our caravans."

"The attacks haven't stopped?"

"No. Those bandits will have to be stopped. We have no idea who they are though, and every time they start a fight, if it's clear they won't win they scurry away. We haven't been able to capture any of them." Balin sighed and shook his head. "Well, forget about that my dear. There's no need for you to worry. Nori might be a thief, but he's an accomplished warrior first. With him and Fili, you're quite safe."

"I know that Balin. I'm not worried about myself." I frowned.

I hadn't paid much attention to what was happening outside the halls during these past months. Maybe I should ask Nori about it before we left. He was a thief after all, so maybe he'd have an idea of who those other thieves were. Balin's voice though forced me to push those thoughts away for the moment.

"Anyway you should be fine. There's been no attack around Archet or in its area." He smiled while taking two different parchments and writing quickly on them. "Here." He handed them to me. "Take one to Fili and give the other to Nori."

I smiled at my guardian. Grabbing the parchments I rolled them properly and put them in my belt. Then I hugged the kind dwarf and we lightly bumped our foreheads again. Very lightly. I didn't want to end up with a concussion.

"Thanks a lot Balin."

"Anytime my dear."

I waved at him before I quickly left and ran away. Taking my map out I looked first what the quickest way to the forges was. I knew now that Fili and Kili worked there almost all the time. They trained early in the morning, before I even started usually and went directly to the forges afterwards. Then depending on the workload there they would come back to train in the afternoon or stay down there.

I quickly made my way down and finally stopped in front of the doors and corridor that lead to the huge forges. I looked at the dwarves around until I saw one I knew a bit. I jolted when someone lightly tapped my shoulder but I smiled immediately when I saw who was behind me.

"Kili! How are you?"

"Hello Meli! I'm fine, what are you doing here?" His toothy smile didn't disappear as he quirked an eyebrow questioningly.

"I'm looking for your brother. Fili is going to go on a mission with me and Nori." I explained simply.

"With you and Nori? How did you convince uncle to let you go?" He replied surprised. "Wait, forget it, just remind me to ask your help next time I need to ask something of him."

I shook my head dismissing his usual silly comments and simply took the two parchments out. I looked at the runes on it and suddenly felt a bit stupid. Even though I knew perfectly how to read and write, here I was illiterate. A bit ashamed I handed the two to Kili and muttered.

"I don't know whether there's a specific one for your brother."

Kili's smile turned kind and he nodded.

"You should ask Ori or Balin to teach you to read." He said softly while quickly looking at both parchments. "I don't see why you couldn't." He muttered.

I chose not to answer as he took one of the parchments. I smiled at him and asked him to give it to Fili quickly before I left to go back home. There I was almost certain I'd see Nori.

When I came in, I was rather surprised not to find him in the living room. Somehow my anxiety skyrocketed as I imagined him trying to sneak out of the Halls in the middle of the day. I strode to the kitchen and immediately saw he wasn't there. Nervous I went to knock at his bedroom door. When he didn't answer immediately, I knocked louder.

He had to be asleep.

Or maybe he was in the training ground.

But he had said that we wouldn't need to go anymore today.

And where could he go? Maybe he was visiting Bofur? Or he might be in the market?

Where was he?

Various scenarios unfolded in my mind and each of them made my anxiety grow. I had known for days that Nori was restless. I had seen it and I had waited because I wasn't sure how to act. And now here I was, in an empty home, fearing that Nori bolted away. A part of my mind told me it wasn't possible, Nori wouldn't have done that.

Another was whispering he might just have.

Oh Mahal…please…

He couldn't have left, could he?

* * *

><p><strong>AN as usual now, thanks a lot for all the very kind reviews :) I'm always happy to read them. Thanks too to all readers/followers and new favorites. **

**So ... where is Nori? ^^**

**After last chapter, you probably all guessed that Amelia's peacefulness wouldn't last that much longer. :P **

**I am awfully late in the update, so I hope the chapter was worth the wait for you all. I'm sorry for the potential mistakes (in spelling or grammar) I am really tired recently, and have trouble focusing properly. I hope it doesn't hinder your reading. **

**I truly have no idea when I'll update the next chapter. Sometime next week (during the week) but don't expect it before Wednesday evening at the earliest.**

**Thanks again and again for all the amazing support :)**


	36. A Way Out

**Everything belongs to JRR Tolkien, except for the plot and OC**

* * *

><p>Nori couldn't have left just like that. He wouldn't do that to us, to me...would he?<p>

I couldn't be too late. I had been so certain that my last idea would help him. I knew perfectly well he wouldn't be happy. How could he when he had been stolen of the opportunity to find back his father's necklace? But still, I had hoped this mission would calm him, ease his restlessness. But if he had just left, it would be all for nothing. The King would find out and then Nori would be banished.

I closed my eyes and clenched my fists as I hit the wooden door one last, hard time. I had to calm down. I was most likely overreacting. Nori could be anywhere within the Halls. The fact that he wasn't here didn't mean he had left. Nori wasn't stupid, he knew the King wouldn't forgive him. He wouldn't make such a mistake. He wouldn't.

I trusted him.

What I had told the King was true. I trusted Nori completely. There was no way he would have left us behind. He would have talked with one of us before leaving.

He was probably somewhere, smoking or drinking ale, maybe even whittling. I just had to wait peacefully for him to come back.

Because I had to trust he would come back soon.

I didn't even want to think about the consequences otherwise.

Except I did think of those. And with those thoughts came the absolute certainty that, if Nori was banished, I would follow him.

I opened my eyes and blinked several times. I couldn't believe myself. I couldn't believe the strength of those feelings I had for him. This crush was stronger than I had thought. It was rather odd to realize just now how far I'd go for this dwarf. I wondered if I would actually be strong, or crazy, enough to follow him anywhere.

Would I truly go wherever he would?

Would I walk with him, if he were to be forced to leave? Would I have the courage to travel through the wild for him?

I didn't know the answer to those questions.

I was standing, frozen, in the corridor when I heard noise in the kitchen. I startled and ran back there hurriedly.

I gasped when I saw Nori who was just coming through the door.

I didn't think for a second and simply ran to him, relieved to see him there.

"Nori!" I exclaimed as I jumped towards him.

I just had the time to see his eyes widen and his mouth open, probably to stop me, before I slammed into him violently intending to hug him strongly.

"Amelia caref..." He tried to say before I collided with him.

"Oy!" I heard someone shout at the same time.

Then there was a loud cracking noise but I didn't have the time to ponder on its cause as Nori stumbled backwards. I yelped as I felt him fall and take me with him. In a matter of seconds I was lying on Nori who was groaning, one arm around my waist and his other hand rubbing the back of his head.

I blinked several times and tried to lift myself. I placed one hand on the floor near Nori and startled. It wasn't damp, it was soaked. At that precise moment I finally heard the unmistakable voice of Bofur whine loudly.

"Oh lass, how could you? By Mahal...It took us ages to finally find one barrel of this ale. It was all thanks to Bombur we even got a chance to buy it."

I tuned him out. My brain was starting to put together pieces of an embarrassing puzzle. I had, once again, overreacted. Clearly Nori hadn't sneaked out. I was a bit out of it at the moment but Nori's voice managed to bring me back to the present.

"Amelia, are you alright?" He asked as I sat on his thighs and looked around.

The floor was now wet with a brownish liquid and behind Nori I could see the broken skeleton of what had been a wooden barrel full of ale.

"I…erm…"

The sight was rather shocking and I was at a loss for words. I was now sadly used to overreact but the result this time was rather visible. The cracked barrel that lay on the floor behind Nori still leaked dark brown ale on the floor. Bofur was looking forlornly at the liquid, pouting like a child.

"I'm sorry." I finally managed to say. "I just…I couldn't find you and I thought…"

Stammering wasn't helping at the moment. I shook my head and finally realized the position I was in. I felt my cheeks start to heat as I tried to scurry away from Nori's lap. I met Nori's eyes for half a second before I looked away, not seeing the pink that tinged his cheeks.

As soon as I was up, I glanced at Bofur. His face was unusually blank but his eyes were riveted on me. When he met my eyes, I saw a slow, cheeky grin pull at one corner of his lips. At that moment, I couldn't help but feel slightly scared. I had no idea what thoughts whirled in this dwarf's mind. Once Nori stood up though, Bofur once more looked forlorn before he started to unexpectedly chuckle.

Nori quirked an eyebrow at him, clearly wondering what could be so fun in such a situation. Then he looked around and sighed before shaking his head. Still, I could see his small smirk and guessed he would rather laugh than cry over the spilt ale. He glanced at me and I had to admit I was relieved to see his eyes twinkle with amusement.

"Meli, you're a wandering danger, I hope you know that." Bofur said between two chuckles.

"I said I was sorry." I muttered, wondering how long it would take to clean all that ale.

I scratched my head, looking at the mess. It was starting to smell quite strongly too, though I wasn't sure whether the dwarves would see this as a problem or not. I groaned in annoyance. If I wasn't so prompt to react stupidly, I could have avoided this stupid situation easily.

"What happened?" Immediately Nori was serious again and I shrugged.

I couldn't really say that I was just a tad anxious about him.

"Nothing really. I couldn't find you and …well I have good news." I decided not to detail my little panic reaction.

Nori frowned a bit but I ignored it. Instead of reacting to his obvious suspicion, I quickly found the piece of parchment hidden in my belt and handed it to him, anxious to see his reaction.

Gingerly he took it and his eyes grew wide as he read it. Then his eyes snapped to mine and he asked.

"You're the one behind this, aren't you?"

His voice was devoid of emotions and his face was blank. For a minute I wondered whether I had made a mistake. Maybe Nori didn't want to go out if it meant going on a mission such as this one. It would be rather disappointing and embarrassing if that were the case. Maybe my idea wasn't as good as it had seemed. I bit my lower lip nervously before trying to answer to his question.

"I, well…" I fumbled for words. "It's just that I…well I went to see Balin. And the King was there and I talked with him and well…"

"What's going on?" Bofur interrupted, obviously curious.

Nori didn't say a word and simply handed him the parchment while still looking at me. I couldn't read him at all, which was rare nowadays. Bofur quickly read the message and looked at me surprised.

"You convinced Thorin to let him go on a mission? How did you do that?"

"I just told him he should trust you more." I shrugged again, embarrassed without knowing why. "I'm going with you by the way. And Fili too."

"You're going too?" Bofur sounded surprised.

"What did Thorin say exactly Amelia?" Nori asked seriously.

I looked away, forcing my eyes to tear away from Nori's intense gaze. I had a feeling he wouldn't be happy about my next words. After all they proved that the King didn't trust him entirely. It would probably annoy him, if not hurt him. I sighed. There was no way I could lie to him. Not about such a matter.

"He said I should go with you. If you sneak away, he would hold me responsible. That's all he said."

Bofur sighed and shook his head, clearly annoyed, while Nori frowned. He looked really angry then.

"Amelia, you're not ready to go out." He simply groaned. "It'll be dangerous for you."

How could this silly dwarf think about such a thing right now? I was telling him he was finally able to go out, and all he had to say was that it would be dangerous for me? That was ridiculous.

"Nori I don't care. I know you won't sneak away." I rolled my eyes. "With you and Fili, I'll be safe." Safety had honestly been far away from my mind when I agreed to go.

Nori glanced at Bofur and seemed to hesitate before answering. The cheeky and curious dwarf looked suddenly highly amused. He didn't chuckle but I could see he was barely restraining himself.

"I'll leave you two alone." He said then. "I'll see you later."

And just like that, he disappeared from our living room. Nori was at first surprised by his friend's quick departure, but in a second his attention was back on me.

"Mizimul, I don't want to see you endangered." He sounded a bit anxious.

"And I don't want to see you behaving like a tiger in a cage." I retorted, looking away.

There was a short silence before Nori cleared his throat.

"A what?"

I turned to face him. He looked puzzled. I played my words back in my head and realized he might not know what a tiger was. I had no idea whether or not this animal existed here. I had never asked myself such questions. I had just assumed that the fauna and flora would be similar if not the same. Now though, I was wondering what surprises I would face when out in the wild. I was still curious about those orcs. I was starting to believe that the dwarves where just being a bit racist and that maybe the orcs were just men with peculiar features. History had proven that men could be stupid when facing different appearances. For all I knew orcs where just people with a different skin colour or 'abnormally' tall or another ridiculous thing like that.

I didn't really have the time to think about that now though. I tried to find the easiest way to explain my words to help Nori understand what I had meant to say.

"It's like a big cat." I tried to explain but his face told me it didn't help. "It's a wild animal. Dangerous but really well…pretty and it's not made to live in a cage."

His expression told me I wasn't doing a good job at explaining the meaning of my sentence. Not at all actually.

"You think I'm like a cat? That I'm pretty?"

It seemed that Nori couldn't even fathom why I would say such weird things. I blushed some more and shook my head.

"No. I'm not. Well. No. I mean, that's not the point." I stammered pathetically.

Taking a slow inhale I managed to calm my nerves a bit.

"What I mean to say it that, I know you don't like being forced to stay here. I know it doesn't suit your personality. So I thought it would help you a bit. I know you won't be able to go around freely, but at least you'll be outside the halls for a bit." I spoke quickly without looking at him. "I didn't know what else to do. I trust you Nori, but I didn't think you would be able to stay put in here for much longer."

He didn't say a word and I didn't dare look at him. My gaze was riveted to my feet and the brown ale on the floor.

I heard him take a few steps.

My eyes opened wide when I felt his arms around my shoulder and waist. Soon I was engulfed in his embrace. My heartbeat immediately sped up and I held my breath for a second.

"Thank you, Mizimul." He whispered softly before leaning back a bit.

When he lightly kissed my brow I felt my whole body tingle.

I was completely frozen on the spot.

Did he thank me? Did Nori just kiss me? Well, he didn't kiss me…but still.

Oh Mahal I was in trouble.

My feelings for him were just too stubborn to disappear. It seemed that they simply kept on growing and growing to the point I feared my heart will burst.

Slowly I brought my arms around his waist. When I hugged him back, I felt him startle a bit in my arms. But soon we were simply embracing each other tightly. My forehead was resting on his shoulder and I could feel his breath against my neck. I swallowed thickly. This was both incredibly nice and terrifying.

After a while though, we seemed to both think at the same time that we should step back. I didn't dare look at him, thus ignoring the fact that he didn't dare look at me either.

I cleared my throat and said softly.

"So you're not angry?"

"Why would I be angry?" He sounded surprised.

"Well, I don't know."

He chuckled a bit at that and I found the courage to glimpse at him when I heard the sound of parchment being unfolded. Nori was reading the paper once more.

"You don't mind going out on a mission?" I asked in a whisper.

He glanced up, looking at me kindly as he smiled a bit.

"Not at all."

I smiled a bit too and looked away. We were silent for a bit when he cleared his throat.

"Promise me you'll try your best not to endanger yourself this time." He said, sounding rather nervous.

I knew he was thinking about the wolf. I knew he wanted me to think of myself first. I couldn't lie to him though.

"I can't." I saw him frown deeply before I continued. "I promise I'll do my best not to be injured though." He hesitated before nodding but I still had to add something. "But you have to promise me something too."

His eyes found mine and I first saw a bit of surprise before he grew serious. He was clearly focusing on my words, waiting for me to tell him what I had on my mind. I swallowed thickly, unsure of his reaction.

"Promise me never to go away without me. Don't leave me behind." I lowered my gaze as I spoke, unable to face him.

"I can't." He replied with a strangled voice. "Mizimul, I would probably have to leave for dangerous missions at some point."

I looked at him then. He was looking both sad and serious. I nodded at his words.

"I don't want to be alone Nori." I murmured shamefully. "I don't want to be abandoned, left behind."

As I pronounced those words, I realized how true they actually were. It was one of my fears here, in this world. I was extremely dependant of the brothers. I couldn't imagine my life without them and Nori was simply too important to me. Being alone, without them, in here seemed worse than being out in the wild with them.

"I would never abandon you. Mizimul… Umzam, I promise to never abandon you, to never leave you alone behind."

My eyes were probably shining with emotion, just like his did as he spoke. I felt that my heart was about to jump outside my ribcage. I couldn't ask for more. I wouldn't ask for more. My crush might be silly and hopeless, but I would settle with this promise. I would settle for a life at his side, even if it was only as a relative.

The silence that followed felt a bit awkward at first, but soon enough Nori was reading the parchment once more.

"Do you know the details of our mission?" He asked calmly.

"I just know it's the three of us." I answered before remembering another thing. "Oh! And that we're going to Archet."

Nori nodded and read the paper before talking again.

"We should leave tomorrow morning. We simply need to go and check what leather and skin products they have to sell, and eventually buy them. It won't take long."

"I hope not." I muttered.

Nori's eyes immediately found me and he frowned a bit, clearly worried.

"You don't want to go? We could talk to Balin about it."

"That's not it." I cut in. "I just don't like that town. I went there once and it's really not my favourite place." I shrugged.

Nothing had happened there but I truly didn't have good memories of Archet. Now that I thought about it, I had absolutely no good memories of men's towns. I loved being in the dwarves' Halls, but I disliked the men's places. That said a lot about me. Maybe I wasn't a good human.

"Men's towns are rarely nice." Nori replied simply, though he was still observing my reactions.

"Don't we need to see Fili before we leave?" I blatantly changed the topics.

Nori nodded and then looked at the floor. The ale was now in a large puddle that went from the middle of the kitchen to the living room. I was quite certain that Dori wouldn't like it. We had to clean that too. What a bother. I sighed and looked at Nori.

"I guess you should go find Fili. I'll clean that."

Nori seemed about to protest but I rolled my eyes and gently pushed him toward the door. I knew that if he wanted to resist I wouldn't be able to make him bulge. Clearly, my dear dwarf wasn't feeling in a cleaning mood.

"And you should change too at some point. You reek of ale." I said teasingly as I could feel his leather clothes were damp in his back.

"Oy. Whose fault is that?" He protested good-naturedly.

I couldn't help but smile when I saw his cheeky grin. It felt oddly good to see it. It somehow reassured me, as if his good mood was nothing but a good sign for the future.

"You shouldn't drink so much anyway. It's bad for your health." I retorted while pushing him strongly outside.

"Oy woman!"

I didn't let him complain. With a laugh I closed the door and, still chuckling lightly, went back toward the kitchen door. The broken barrel was still lying there pitifully. With a sigh I rolled my sleeves up and started to clean.

* * *

><p>When Dori found out that both Nori and I were going on a mission he clearly had conflicting emotions. I knew he was immediately worried about me and Nori. That was easily perceived. He was somehow happy too, I could tell. But his worries were stronger than anything else.<p>

"Are you sure that Amelia is strong enough?" He asked Nori almost immediately.

Nori took his time to answer. He blew a few rings of smoke, watching them grow bigger before he finally looked at his brother.

"She improved her skills." He said at first, obviously not convincing Dori whatsoever. "She'll be with me Dori. I'll protect her."

"I know that." Dori sighed loudly before looking at me. "Make sure this halfwit stays out of trouble."

"Oy!"

I couldn't help but laugh at that, especially when I saw Nori's offended pout as he glared at his brother.

"I'll try my best Dori, I swear." I winked in Ori's direction, making the youngest smile widely.

Nori glared at me before sighing loudly. Ori patted his shoulder supportively before piping in with a smile.

"I'm not sure which one will keep the other out of trouble."

"Oy!" Both Nori and I chorused as Dori nodded.

That evening was spent preparing for the following day's departure. Dori was clearly getting more nervous as minutes passed. Ori didn't really look happy about this mission either. I knew the both of them would be really anxious during our time away. It was true that this world was dangerous, but from what I had gathered, it had been apparently especially so these past months.

I wondered at some point whether Nori could have been able to find some more information about this group of thieves if he had wanted.

The usual danger aside, there was the fact as well that Nori might take his chance to get away. I didn't believe he would. I was rather certain Dori and Ori trusted their brother to a certain extent too. But Nori had been so restless recently that I was sure they saw it too. They had just chosen to remain silent about it.

If I were honest, I would admit I was a bit anxious too. The problem was, I wasn't too sure what made me so nervous about this mission.

I knew I would be safe. I was with Nori after all, and Fili was a strong warrior.

I knew Nori wouldn't leave us. I trusted him completely.

But I was a bit nervous anyway.

Maybe it was the prospect to be spending my days and nights for weeks near Nori.

There arrived the blush.

I really had to find a way to stop this reaction. It would soon become awkward if I kept on blushing all day long. Fili and Nori would see it and they were both curious and stubborn.

I could only hope I wouldn't react like that during this mission.

* * *

><p>The following morning I woke up early. Unsurprisingly the three brothers were already awake and Fili was having breakfast with them.<p>

"Good morning." I yawned as I sat next to Ori.

The kind dwarf filled my plate while I grabbed a bread roll and started to munch on it. My mind was still fogged by sleep but I was alert enough to realize they were all silent. I stopped eating and looked at the dwarves. They were all looking at me with various expressions ranging from kind amusement to outright fun. Fili of course was apparently the merriest one.

"You know Amelia, dwarves usually pride themselves on their amazingly braided hair."

"So what?" I asked bluntly, not understanding why he was saying that.

"So maybe you should do something for the nest on your head." He deadpanned with a grin.

I blinked then looked at the three brothers.

Nori was looking slightly amused. I could see the fondness in his eyes and his gaze made my heart swell with warmth and happiness. Ori was apparently agreeing with Fili as he smiled joyously while adding yet another piece of cheese on my plate. There was no way I could see myself eating that huge pile of food.

Dori for his part stood up and looked kindly at me. I could see he was going to ask me something.

"Amelia, would you let me?" He gestured to my hair and I understood the hidden meaning.

Only family or close kin could braid your hair. I understood that already. At this moment, while I was facing Dori's kind yet slightly unsure smile, I didn't even hesitate before nodding.

"Of course"

His smile grew softer and it was easy to see he was deeply moved by my answer. I honestly didn't understand why. It was clear for me that they were family, though this still broke my heart whenever I thought about Nori. Dori and Ori at least were as close to family as one could be. I didn't see any reason not to acknowledge it in front of someone else. I didn't even glance towards Nori though. Something didn't feel right suddenly and my good mood turned a bit bittersweet. I asked myself what my answer would have been if Nori had been the one to ask.

Accepting would mean that I saw him as family. In my mind, that meant as brothers. The thought of Nori being my brother left me not only sad, but bitter as well. On the other hand, refusing would mean I didn't trust him enough with my hair. It would mean I didn't want him to be too close. That was an offense...and far from what I was feeling for him.

I didn't pay attention to the other as I was lost in my thoughts. I was honestly shocked when I realized that I actually wanted Nori to braid my hair. Now that I was thinking about it, I didn't think he ever did. Dori of course had braided my hair, well, he had only touched my ward's braid. That was about to change.

Silently Dori walked behind me and I almost immediately felt his hands work in my long wavy brown hair. He undid some braids only to braid them immediately again. The last one he made was my ward's braid. It would be slightly longer now but I didn't mind. As he worked I realized that I would enjoy this moment too if Nori did it.

But I guessed it would never happen. I didn't want to see him as a brother.

"Maybe I should wear them in a ponytail." I said absentmindedly, trying to tear my thoughts away from Nori.

"It might be easier for you to move around then. But your braids won't be hidden at all." Dori simply answered.

"I don't mind." I replied in a shrug. "I can always hide them when we arrive in a men's town, but I don't really see the point. I am travelling with dwarves after all. Men don't need the braids to realize that."

"In that case…" He whispered before standing up and leaving the kitchen.

I was rather surprised by his reaction. I didn't understand why Dori would disappear like that from the room, just because I had chosen to tie my hair. I looked at the other, unsure of how they would react.

"Did I say something wrong?"

Ori smiled and was the first to answer.

"Not at all. Though I wonder why Dori left." He then didn't seem to think much more about it as he bit into a huge piece of ham.

"After all the problems we've had recently, maybe you should still hide your braids when we'll be in town." Fili said, ignoring the other matter.

"I don't see how I could hide them all." I replied pointing to the one in the back of my head with the large metal bead. "This one especially, it's clearly a dwarvish bead and I can't really hide it. I don't want to remove them either." I muttered stubbornly.

Strangely enough I was rather protective of those braids. I liked them. But more than that I knew they were important and meaningful. It didn't matter that the last one meant I had killed someone. It was a braid that Dís had made herself. She had given me the beads and I cared for them. They were mine and were a proof of my odd life within the dwarvish culture. These braids meant a lot to me too. I was proud of wearing garnet. I was proud of being a ward. I was proud of being recognized as kin by Danà, Gloin and Gimli. And even if I wasn't proud of having killed someone, I was glad of being accepted as someone strong.

"You shouldn't remove them." Ori said, almost afraid.

"I don't want to Ori." I reassured him, though I made a mental note to ask someone what it would mean exactly if I did.

All the while Nori had kept silent. He was observing us, well observing me mostly. He seemed rather peaceful today and I could only guess that the prospect of leaving the Halls soon was putting him at ease.

"If you simply wear a hood or a hat it'll be fine." He finally said.

I smiled at him. I knew that a hood or a hat wouldn't protect me. Nori would.

At that time Dori came back and sat next to me. He was holding something in his palm and he opened it slowly.

"Here" He said.

I looked down to see a very nice string made of various braided leather strands. In the middle was a small stone. Looking closer I recognized a simplified version of their family's crest.

"Dori…it is…"

"It belonged to our mother." He softly added.

I was left speechless.

It was an incredibly sweet present and I couldn't resist the urge to hug Dori. His simple gestures were always so meaningful. It seemed to me that dwarves were loud and blunt but when it truly mattered, they remained silent and acted instead of speaking aloud.

Dori was smiling softly when I finally let go of him. Wordlessly he gathered my hair into a low ponytail and tied them with their mother's trinket.

Ori and Nori seemed just as happy as Dori and Fili remained silent, smiling kindly.

After a few minutes Nori stood up and handed me something covered in a thin and supple leather skin.

"Here. You still have a lot to work on, but we'll all feel much better if you're properly armed this time."

I gingerly took the package. It was rather heavy and I knew from his words I would find a weapon in here.

"But I already have one dagger. Isn't that enough?"

Fili and Nori both snorted at that before glancing at each other.

"The dagger I gave you isn't really a weapon. It's more of a last resort kind of blade…or a cheese knife…" Nori explained while taking a piece of chicken and biting into it.

"Why did you give it to me then?" I couldn't help but ask, feeling oddly offended by this comment, I liked my little dagger.

"I wasn't about to give you a real weapon when I knew you wouldn't be able to use it properly. But I couldn't let you go without at least a blade of some sort." He shrugged and gestured for me to look inside the package.

I cautiously removed the leather and startled a bit.

Inside there were two rather long daggers in their sheath. I could already see that the blades were slightly incurved. I took hold of one and found it surprisingly comfortable in my hand. Even though I had at first thought the package to be a bit heavy, it felt light, or rather balanced, in my hand. Gingerly I unsheathed it. The blade was indeed incurved; it was thinner near the handle before enlarging a bit and it ended in a sharp point. I could see some runes engraved on the handle but that was the only decoration.

Those were weapons. Obviously meant to kill or maim.

I felt a shiver at that thought but I surprisingly managed to calm myself. I gripped the handle a bit more tightly as I stared at the blade. With that, I might have to kill someone else.

I felt the fear and disgust almost immediately at that thought.

Yet I steeled my nerves shockingly easily.

I would do it if I was forced to.

Slowly I sheathed the blade back and looked up at Nori.

The dwarves were once more silent, appraising me, waiting for any reaction on my part. After a few seconds I smiled widely.

"Thanks Nori. I'll have to train harder when we come back so that I can properly use them."

He just nodded.

After a quick breakfast we were getting ready to leave. Nori being the oldest was the one entrusted with the money for the eventual trades we'd made. Dori and Ori started to clean the dishes. While Fili was checking his backpack, Nori came closer and took my new daggers.

"Here, let me help." He simply said.

Quickly he worked the sheaths and attached them to my belt, the one he had offered me so long ago and that I wore all the time now.

"The most important thing," He explained calmly. "It's that you're perfectly comfortable with them. You have to put them so that it'll be easy for you to unsheathe them quickly. They shouldn't hinder your movements at all. They shouldn't be in the way. Alright?"

"I understand." I nodded.

"Do you prefer to have them at your side or in your back?" He asked.

After trying both positions, I decided to place them in my back. Nori helped me to adjust the handles so that in one swift move I could grab them and unsheathe the blades.

Once I was ready I realized that both Nori and Fili had been waiting for me. Still we were in no hurry, as Nori highlighted, so they allowed me to stop by the healing wards where I replenished my stock of ointments, bandages and plants.

It was easily the middle morning when we finally left.

Dori and Ori had come to the entrance to see us off. At that moment I remembered the discussion I had with Dori once. He had been right back then. It seemed to always hurt a bit when I left the Halls.

* * *

><p>We walked in silence for awhile until Fili and I naturally started to talk about various topics. Nori would from time to time add a comment but he mostly remained quiet. He was walking a few steps ahead and Fili and I simply followed without really asking any question about the direction.<p>

At some point though I realized we weren't following the usual path. The one we were on was much smaller. The rocky ground was uneven and I had to look where I put my feet in order not to stumble. I had needed Nori's help to attach my long staff to my backpack. Like this at least I could use both my hands to help me keep my precarious balance. Fili and Nori were doing much better than me and I was really surprised when I realized that Nori wasn't actually making any noise while walking.

It was shocking and each of my steps suddenly seemed really noisy in my ears.

As I observed him though, I couldn't help but be impressed to see Nori stride so swiftly in the rocky path. Even Fili had to look at his feet. There were many tricky parts to avoid, sharp rocks or unstable ones that would make us trip and maybe fall. But for Nori it seemed completely effortless to avoid those little natural traps.

In the end I was surprised in the afternoon to realize we were already down at the feet of the mountain. When we followed the larger path, it usually took a bit more time to leave the mountain paths and reach the valley.

Still I was rather tired already. It felt as if we had climbed down more than walked.

Some parts we had to jump down rocks that were reaching up to my waist.

During those moments Fili and Nori had naturally turned to help me. It was nice of them, though at one point I had seen Fili send a surprised glance in Nori's direction. I hadn't asked why at that moment and didn't see the point now, so I simply put it out of my mind. I had gratefully accepted the offered hands each time. I didn't want to break an ankle because of some misplaced pride. When we had been going down this way, we had all been silent and focused on the path. I could see that Fili was slightly surprised too. Nori though seemed completely at ease.

It felt amazing to finally leave the mountain. I could see a forest not even two miles away from the spot we had arrived to after climbing down. But Nori didn't seem in a hurry to walk there and we ended up taking a break.

After taking large gulps of water from my water skin, I turned to Nori and asked the question that had turned in my head for hours.

"Why did we get down this way? I don't think it's the most used one."

"I can tell you it's definitely not used often." Fili said before drinking some more.

"And this is the reason why we came down here and didn't use the usual path." Nori calmly stated.

He didn't even seem to need a break. He hadn't taken his water skin out and casually leant on a huge boulder, watching around before he glanced at us.

"We have quite a nice sum of gold and silver with us. With the reports of theft activity in the region, it's possible we'll be ambushed. Where do you think thieves might wait for their preys?"

I took a second to think. Fili frowned, obviously taking Nori's words seriously. It was nice to see that Fili, being a young dwarf, didn't seem to despise Nori. On the contrary, the heir seemed quite interested to learn the thief's tricks. Ori had even told me once that Nori had shown Fili how to hide weapons properly. Considering the fact that most dwarves avoided Nori, it only made me appreciate Fili more to think he wasn't as prejudiced as others.

The thief patiently waited for us to work it out. His gaze was once more turned to our surroundings, his arms crossed over his chest. He clearly was on watch.

Fili was the first one to talk.

"They will watch the roads and main paths?" He asked with a frown.

Nori nodded, still not looking at us.

"It's the easiest way to catch something. You do it too when you hunt. You try to find the paths walked by the animals and the areas they go to, the places where they eat or drink. Then you wait and catch your prey. It's easier than trailing it." Nori calmly explained.

"So you mean that they would wait for us on the roads?" I frowned.

"Not necessarily for us." He shrugged. "But I don't want to take any risks. It's not such an easy walk, but it'd be safer and quicker to walk through less walked paths."

"Don't we risk finding wild animals on those paths? Won't it be more dangerous then?" Fili wondered.

"I'd rather fight a wolf or two than a dozen bandits." Nori simply shrugged but his eyes found me at that moment, gauging my reaction.

"The odds are more in our favour that way I guess." I tried to let him know I wasn't afraid.

He clearly knew what he was doing. After all Nori had spent decades roaming this world alone and he usually came back relatively unscathed. If there was someone we could trust, then it should be him. Besides, a thief understood other thieves' thoughts, right?

"Don't we risk getting lost though?" I couldn't help but ask.

Nori smirked and even Fili seemed to find my remark amusing.

"We don't need roads to find our way Amelia." Nori answered. "Maybe we could use this little trip to teach you a few useful things."

"Aye. Like lighting a fire. Last time you weren't really good at it." Fili chuckled.

"Oy, let me tell you that were I come from lighting a fire isn't a skill anyone need to know." I retorted.

"Maybe, but here you do." Nori commented. "And it won't hurt for you to know that anyway."

Nori looked at us for a second before taking a step away from the boulder he was leaning on.

"Alright, let's go. We'll stop soon to camp, but first we need to reach the forest."

That day we walked for a few more hours before we found a very small clearing, if it could be called that, and we decided to camp there.

Soon Fili disappeared to collect some fire wood and once he was back, they both showed me once more how to light it. The results that evening weren't convincing. While the stew we had prepared was cooking, Nori decided to force both Fili and I to do a little training session. The hateful Nori was back but for once he wasn't entirely focused on me. Fili soon came to understand why my trainings had been so painful in the past months.

Still it didn't last long and we were quickly all sitting around the fire, Fili and Nori smoking peacefully while I was sitting near them with my staff lying at my side. I was occupying myself by writing in a brand new notebook that Ori had offered me. The previous one was on a shelf in my room. When he had found out I had finished it, Ori had insisted on buying another one for me.

"What do you write in that Amelia?" Fili asked after awhile.

"Nothing special. The events of the day, some of my thoughts too." I shrugged.

"May I see it?" Fili's grin seemed deceivingly innocent.

Nori snorted lightly and I handed the notebook.

"Sure." I replied with a smile.

I immediately saw the mischievous glint in Fili's eyes.

"Really? I thought you even wrote your personal thoughts in that."

"It's fine."

"Alright then." He said taking the notebook.

As soon as he looked in it, his grin disappeared into a small pout before his natural curiosity took over.

"What is this? Is it your language?" His eyes were shining with interest and it made me chuckle.

"Yes. Did you think I wrote in runes?" I shook my head slightly.

"Well. Honestly I had never thought about that at all." His cheeky grin was back in an instant.

"Fair enough." I laughed good-heartedly.

I glanced toward Nori and saw him quickly turn his gaze away from me. I felt my heart falter for a second. Had Nori been observing me? That wasn't really unusual but why would he then turn away?

I was feeling conflicted. I was curious about what Nori could be thinking about me. But on the other hand I didn't really want to think that he might never see me as anything else than a sister. At least right now I had the possibility to dream a bit. Well, I tried to avoid it and I only allowed my mind to go down those paths during the night. But still. I couldn't help but wonder. What was Nori thinking about when he looked at me? When he observed me? When he smirked or winked at me?

Looking up I realized the stars were out and the night had truly fallen.

Nori decided then that we would keep watch during the night. As always I would have the last one, but Nori promised to show me how to count time from the stars' position.

Fili was the first one on watch. He sat by the fire, smoking peacefully.

For my part I simply lied down and closed my eyes. I could only hope I would fall asleep quickly. Nights tended to be short when one had to keep watch for a good part of it.

* * *

><p>It wasn't Nori who woke me during that night. It was an unpleasant feeling of seeping cold that disturbed me from my much needed sleep. I blinked as something tickled my cheek until I realized it was actually raining. Around the same time I realized that, I saw a shadow above me and startled.<p>

Immediately I sat up but the shadow, who turned out to be Nori, stopped my hand from reaching my dagger.

"Good reflex. But not quick enough." He murmured. "Here take this coat."

"It's yours." I stammered a bit.

"You were shivering Mizimul."

His whisper made me shiver too. But I realized then that I was really cold. I accepted the warm coat Nori handed me before I whispered back.

"What about you? And Fili?"

"I'll be fine, don't worry for me. Fili is alright too. He got some pretty warm clothes."

I nodded and yawned. I was tired but I didn't see how I could fall asleep with the soft drizzle. I looked at Nori. His face was half hidden by his hood and I couldn't see his eyes. Still I could feel them on me. I yawned once more.

"When are you supposed to wake me?"

"You could still sleep for a good hour." He murmured.

"Nonsense, I'm awake now. I might as well keep you company." I smiled at him and he shook his head.

"You should sleep Mizimul."

"I can't. Please, let me keep you company."

I saw him hesitate. I could feel he wanted me to sleep and it did hurt a bit to think he might not appreciate my company. But another part of me was quite certain that he was only thinking about my well-being. Any way I didn't care. I wanted to be with him for a bit.

He sighed and finally relented, nodding to me and gesturing me toward a large tree that would give us some protection against the rain.

I sat close to him. Our shoulders were touching and it made me slightly giddy just to be here. This was both annoying and pleasant actually. I sighed and closed my eyes for a short while. I enjoyed being there, even if it wasn't comfortable, even if the rain was annoying and cold. I enjoyed it. Nori was warm though and unconsciously I started to snuggle a bit closer to him. The smell of the rain didn't mask entirely his and I pressed my nose a little closer too.

I didn't register or even think then that I had to be really close to him in order to realize those little details.

When my eyes fluttered back open, I didn't react at first. It was still dark and the rain hadn't stopped. The remnants of our fire were pitiful; the embers had probably died a while ago. I could barely make out Fili's shape on the other side of the little clearing. The poor dwarf was probably completely drenched.

As my brain started to work more or less normally, I realized I should be cold and drenched too. I wasn't. I should be embarrassed by my position too, but I really wasn't.

I had obviously fallen asleep with my head on Nori's shoulder. I was actually leaning against him. The kind thief had apparently protected me with his own cloak as I could feel it around my shoulder.

I blinked a bit and slowly rubbed my eyes.

Nori didn't move. He was currently occupying himself with a piece of wood he was whittling.

"What time is it? Why didn't you wake me for my watch?" I asked in a whisper.

"You needed the sleep. I'm used not to sleep much." He replied as if it was evident.

"You're also the strongest one in our group. Logically you should sleep more so that you're not tired if something bad happen." I muttered half asleep.

"Being tired will not prevent me from protecting you." He whispered then before adding. "Both of you."

My heart was already doing somersaults in my chest. Damn this dwarf. How could I not love him when he said cheesy yet sweet stuff like this? Not falling completely in love with him might be harder than what I had previously believed.

A thought struck me then.

Why didn't I want to fall in love with Nori again?

Oh right.

He was family.

He was a dwarf and I was far from being one.

Putting aside the fact that we were supposed to be somewhat close to siblings now, there was still the fact that I didn't have a pretty beard or anything close to what beautiful dwarves' lady had. It was the first time in my life that I really regretted not having a beard. That was odd. And I didn't have strong arms like Dís or the sturdy body shape of Danà. It had always amazed me that someone could be both stocky and yet so feminine. Anyway, even though I was objectively rather curvy, my body was still far from stocky or voluptuous.

I sighed forlornly.

No.

I had never had a boyfriend before in a world where I was seen as normal. I couldn't see how any dwarf would want me now that I was far from the norm.

Oh, I was certain dwarves, or at least some of them, loved me and appreciated me. I was one of their wards, one of their kin. I was a damn good healer around this world because I had some knowledge they didn't. I wasn't that bad in diplomacy and I was working hard to become someone they would be proud of, someone they would trust.

But those were entirely different matters.

"You should sleep some more." Nori's voice brought me out of my depressing thoughts.

"No. It's my turn to watch now. You sleep." I shifted a bit, sitting straight.

I immediately felt the loss when I shifted away from Nori.

I sighed and stopped his coming protest by speaking first.

"Nori. Go to sleep now. It's the healer talking."

He didn't say a word and didn't move for awhile, but he slowly put his small knife back in its hiding place and the wood in one of his inner pocket. Then he crossed his arms and shifted, leaning more heavily against the tree.

In a matter of minutes I was certain he was asleep, leaving me alone with my forlorn thoughts as I waited for the sun to rise.

* * *

><p>Dawn didn't come quickly enough.<p>

I was bored, cold and drenched when the light finally started to change, announcing the sun was rising somewhere in the East. Still the rain didn't stop and it was mostly my instinct more than anything else that told me that it was time to wake my friends.

I stood up, stretching my tired and cold limbs before turning to wake Nori. He was already awake. My own movements had probably disturbed his sleep.

Fili wasn't in a good mood that morning. If I were honest I would say none of us were. It hadn't stopped raining and we couldn't light a fire to warm us or cook anything. Breakfast consisted of bits of dried meat and bread that was eaten standing under the trees. I missed my warm tea already as the cold of the rain seemed to sip directly to my bones.

It wasn't long before we started walking once more.

It was a pain to make our way through the forest and bushes with all the mud caused by this never ending rain. Right then I wished we had forgotten about security and just walked on the main road. From time to time I would slip and had to catch whatever was nearby in order not to fall. When I was lucky, it was Fili or Nori. When I wasn't it were bushes or trees that would scratch my hands.

I guessed I could have used my staff, but somehow I didn't think about it. Maybe unconsciously I didn't want to use what I considered to be a defensive weapon as a mere walking stick.

The mud was driving me mad.

I wouldn't even start to talk about the state of my clothes. Mud was a pain.

All day long rain poured on us.

For lunch too we hate cold food while standing, simply because there was nowhere dry to sit comfortably. By that time, my legs were already starting to protest about this unkind treatment. I hadn't known until then that walking in the mud was much harder than simply walking. It was sometimes a struggle to lift my feet off the spongy and sticky ground.

Mid afternoon we decided to start looking for someplace drier to camp.

I couldn't imagine sleeping anywhere covered with mud.

It was Fili who caught sight of a large and flat stone under which we found some dry ground. I wanted to immediately lie down under the boulder but Nori stopped me.

"We should use our coats to protect us from the wind. Besides if you go with your coat on, the ground will be soaking wet in no time."

His voice was kind but tired as he explained this to me. Quickly I nodded while we found some long, broken branches nearby. Cold rain was falling on my face and I could feel some drops making their ways on the column of my neck, making me shiver.

After maybe fifteen minutes we had somehow put enough branches against the boulder to create some sort of vegetal wall that protected us from the rain. Quickly we gathered some wood, though all of it was wet. Then we scurried under our makeshift hut. We removed our cloak, hanging them somehow with the outside against the branches and the inside facing us and thus being protected a bit more. We had to bend in two under the stone but once we were all sitting it was somehow comfy.

Well, not really comfy, but much better than being outside in the mud. Fili and Nori had insisted and I had been forced to sit between them. I was honestly glad for it. I was rather tired and cold and being in the middle provided me with some more warmth.

Nori tried for several long minutes to light a fire but the wood was so wet that it took him maybe thrice as long as usual before he actually managed to get a small flame going. It was a pitiful fire, considering the place we had we couldn't do much, but it was comforting to see the small flame. And it did warm us a bit.

"I hate this weather." I muttered under my breath.

"Aye…" The dwarves agreed moodily.

"Do you think this flame will be enough to warm some water and cook something?" I didn't try to hide the hope I felt.

"I'm not sure."

"We could try." Fili was always the optimist.

That evening we ate some bread and cheese. The fire had been too small.

During the night we were all huddled together. It reminded me of the time when Bofur, Kili, Fili and I were trying to run away from the men. The feeling was different though, and it didn't take me long to realize that being with Nori was what made it mostly so different.

I didn't hesitate to snuggle close to him. I had a good excuse for it. Just before my mind fell completely asleep, I would like to believe I felt Nori snuggle closer to me too. I might have held onto his arm and maybe he lightly placed his other hand on mine. But everything was so foggy that I might have dreamt it all.

And what a nice dream it was, to think he would willingly nestle against me.

* * *

><p>Nori's shortcut through the wild helped us gain some time. Instead of the week and a half it took usually, we arrived in Archet two days earlier. That didn't change the fact that out of the nine days of travel, six of them had been spent under pouring rain.<p>

We were rather pitiful to look at.

My boots, breeches, cloak and even my lighter coat were muddied.

The prospect of sleeping in a real bed with a real roof on top of my head was probably the reason why I was actually happy to see Archet. I had hated this place. I could remember the leers some men had sent in my direction once they had realized I was a woman and was sharing a room with men. I hadn't talked about it with Nori though. I could already imagine his reaction if I were to tell him that.

Still, even though those leers had really disturbed me, I knew I would insist for sharing a room with Nori and Fili. I didn't mind sleeping on the floor if it came to that but I truly didn't want to be alone in this place.

We made our way through the streets to the town's inn and entered without hesitation. That was the same place where we had stayed the last time and the man behind the counter was the same lanky old man with grey and greasy hair and bad teeth. When he informed us that he had no room Nori tried to insist. His bargains weren't of any use though and not ten minutes later we were back in the streets.

"What now?" I uselessly asked.

Fili shrugged. He was at a loss, just like me.

"Should we go back to the woods and find a place to camp?" He voiced my own thoughts.

Nori looked at the cloudy sky and frowned.

"No. It might rain tonight and I'm not sure the area is safe. I'd rather we sleep inside." He finally muttered unhappily.

"But wasn't that the only inn in this town?" I wondered, pointing at the door behind me.

"No." Nori shook his head and it was easy to see he was concerned and annoyed. "There's another inn a bit further. It's just not really the kind of place any of you should go to."

At that Fili and I exchanged a surprised glance before Nori explained some more.

"It's the kind of places I went to when I wanted to find some information or some people."

He didn't need to say more. My mind provided me with the image of a place dirtier still than the one we just left. I could see weird looking men too. I shivered. Well, it would still be better than sleeping outside. I needed to ask something now though.

"Will we…erm I mean, if it's such a place can we then, well, share a room?" I blushed a bit.

"I won't let you alone in this place." Nori answered immediately as if it was obvious. "We'll share a room. It'll be safer for all of us."

Fili nodded and I sighed in relief. Not losing anymore time we followed Nori to a dingy building that was on the outskirts of town. That was exactly the kind of places I would have avoided at all costs, but we truly didn't have much choice. The man behind the counter was surprisingly fat and tall. I hated him on the spot. His eyes shone with nothing but hate and all my instincts were screaming at me to run as far from him as possible.

When Nori asked for one room the innkeeper glanced in my direction and snorted before scratching the dirty scruff on his chin.

"I can make you a price if you share." He told Nori.

Fili glimpsed at me as I frowned. Share? What was Nori supposed to share? I looked at the thief as his fists clenched to the point his joints blanched. What was going on?

"We'll pay the usual." Nori's voice was cold and harsh.

"You sure? She's small but she'll get customers easily."

Then it dawned on me exactly what this disgusting man had meant and I froze. I wanted to leave. I wanted to sleep in the woods. I didn't mind sleeping in the mud as long as I was far away from this man and his customers. I had no illusions that they would be exactly like the innkeeper.

"I'm sure. We don't share. We'll pay full price."

Nori's tone could have frozen Thorin's Halls furnace. The innkeeper probably sensed it because he didn't add anything. Meanwhile Fili had stepped closer to me and his reassuring presence at my side gave me some more strength. I couldn't see Nori's face but his shoulder were tensed and I could easily imagine the glare he sent to the man.

"As you want." The innkeeper licked his lower lips while looking at me with a disappointed look on his face.

Hadn't Fili been next to me, I would have taken a step back. Immediately though, Nori placed himself between me and the man.

"Give us our key now." He ordered and thanks Mahal, the innkeeper obeyed.

The thief quickly snatched the key from the man's hand before the fat keeper could realize it. Nori immediately walked away and Fili and I followed him closely. I regretted dearly not to have worn my hood when we entered this place. None of us had thought of it and I wasn't sure it would have made any difference.

The place was creepy and dirty. The corridors were dark and there was a strange, pungent smell; sweat, alcohol and smoke among others that I didn't try to identify. The floor was slightly sticky and I couldn't wait to leave this place.

Nori easily found our room, there were maybe six of them, at least from what I could tell. He opened the door, which creaked and entered the dark room. Fili and I stepped in too and we both let our gazes wander on the furniture.

Two small beds, two wooden chairs, a table with a basin and a small window. That was it.

My eyes went back to the beds. I wasn't sure I wanted to sleep on that. It looked dirty and I wondered whether there would be flees in the rather obviously unwashed sheets. I could probably catch some sort of disease by simply looking at them.

Nori had already closed the door behind us and was now walking to the chairs. He took one while Fili and I observed him, and he went back to place it against the door, effectively closing it. He then went to the window and glanced through it from the side.

Fili and I hadn't made any moves yet. We were both surprised by Nori's behaviour and I wasn't sure I understood exactly what was going on.

Nori finally turned to face us and his face was deadly serious as he spoke.

"Alright. I don't want Amelia to stay alone while we're here. Preferably I don't want you to be alone either." He said looking at me and Fili alternatively. "Tonight we'll stay here, but we'll keep watch. It's too late to see the merchants today, we'll go tomorrow in the morning. If possible, we'll leave Archet tomorrow afternoon. Otherwise we'll go back to the other inn and see if they have rooms. If not and depending on the weather we'll leave for the woods."

"Is it…" I hesitated before speaking. "Is it so dangerous in this inn?"

Nori looked at me, locking his gaze to mine so I could see how serious he truly was.

"Aye." He simply answered.

That was enough to put me on edge and Fili on alert. Nori then went to check our food supply and grumpily admitted we might have no choice but to eat downstairs that evening.

"Let's go now." He said. "It's still early, there might not be as many people. I want the both of you to wear your hoods."

"You won't?" Fili asked.

"I don't need to. You both do." Nori smirked slightly but it soon disappeared.

Fili and I were really obedient. It was clear we were currently in Nori's world. Neither I nor the prince knew how to act or react in such a place, but it was clear enough that Nori was somehow used to it. We didn't even think about questioning Nori's orders. We obeyed. Not leaving any of our belongings behind in the room, we exited and walked to the large dining room.

Once we were downstairs, Nori went immediately to sit in one of the darkest booth and he gestured for me to slide to sit near the wall. Nori sat next to me and Fili faced me. It was Nori who ordered food for us. Cold meat, cheese and bread. Nothing to drink. When I sent him a questioning glance that was echoed by Fili he whispered lowly.

"Drugs."

That word was enough to knot my stomach. I wasn't hungry at all anymore. Thankfully we still had some water left in our water skin. But at least Nori was right, there was no way anyone could drug this meal.

The server brought us our food quickly and Nori paid him. People were starting to fill in the room and the noise level quickly rose. I could only say that this crowd wasn't exactly the kind I usually liked.

I was eating a piece of bread when my gaze went to the entrance door. My fingers let the bread fall on the table as my blood froze in my veins. My eyes were riveted on the man who had just got in. I didn't need to get a closer look. I was already terrified.

We had to get out of this place.

We had to.

Now.

* * *

><p><strong>AN**

**I am really sorry about this long wait. I didn't plan it (obviously) but I had some problems and a hectic life in the past month. I apologize for making you wait and being unable to answer your reviews and PMs.**

**I want to let you all know that I intend to finish this story. I won't abandon it, and especially not without posting a word (if I somehow were to stop it) I just didn't have any internet access for awhile. **

**I really want to thank all of you though. I received amazing and kind reviews and I was really moved by the worried PMs I received. It was overwhelming to open my account to find so many waiting for me. Thank you all.**

**I hope this chapter didn't disappoint anyone after this long waiting period. I hope you were a bit surprised too :) and that several things are becoming slowly more obvious.**

**I unfortunately couldn't write in the past month, so I don't know when I'll post the next chapter. I'll try to post it sooner though, probably in a week or so. **

**Once again, thank you everyone. **


	37. Troubles Come in Threes

**Everything belongs to JRR Tolkien, except for the plot and OC**

* * *

><p>I hadn't moved at all for several long seconds, maybe even a whole minute.<p>

It was only Nori's hand on mine that steered me away from my frozen state. Our eyes met and I couldn't hide the fear in mine. Immediately I saw the change in Nori's behaviour. He had been cautious and on alert before, now though it was another thing entirely to witness. His face turned blank, his eyes cold and his muscles tensed. Barely moving he glanced in the direction I had and I immediately felt him tense some more.

That surprised me though.

Nori hadn't been here when I had met this man.

I was the only one who had faced him for a long period of time. I didn't think Fili had talked to him much either, but he might remember him. Nori though, had no reason to know him. At least none that I knew of.

I followed the man's moves as he strode confidently to sit at a large table in the centre of the room. He walked as if he owned this place and the thought that he might terrified me. The scar on his face was still disgustingly frightening, marring his face in an ugly grimace. I could see the weird metallic club hanging at his side. For some reasons, this weapon was deeply disturbing me.

The man from Gorm.

The mercenary, who had killed Gorm's master and taken his home before attacking Bofur, Fili, Kili and I, was sitting five meters away from me.

Fili had seen him too now and I saw his hand slowly go closer to one of his swords handles.

I held my breath afraid the man would look in our direction and recognize us despite the darkness and our hoods. I felt Nori lightly tug on my arm and I looked at him. He discreetly gestured towards the stairs and it wasn't complicated to understand what he wanted. Slowly and walking close to the wall, the three of us disappeared from the main room and went directly to our room. During the time it took us to go back upstairs, I could feel my heart hammer against my ribcage. My brain provided me with numerous scenarios in which someone would see and point us to the man. I could imagine bloody fights ensuing. I was in a pathetic state of worry when we finally arrived at our room.

This time it reassured me to see Nori block the door with a chair. Actually I would have liked him to block it with the beds too.

Immediately once that was done he unsheathed one of his weapons. At first I didn't understand why. But then I realized that he was getting ready for being attacked. Nori was nervous. Fili imitated him and I could only swallow thickly, scared.

"How do you know this man?" I asked worriedly.

"I'm more curious about how you could both know him." Nori snapped.

I didn't feel offended by his tone. He wasn't angry at us, he was just really on edge right now and it only made me more uneasy. Nori wasn't supposed to be nervous. It didn't feel right to see him like this.

"He was the one leading the group that attacked us back in Gorm." Fili answered immediately.

I saw Nori's face pale quite visibly as he looked at me. He seemed suddenly really, really worried, probably more than I had seen him in awhile.

Quickly he strode to me and grabbed my forearm. His grip was strong, but it didn't hurt me at all. The way he looked and behaved only made me more nervous though.

"You were alone with him?" He asked and I nodded. "What did he do to you? Did he do anything?"

Nori's anxiety was only scaring me at this point and I shook my head, eyes wide in fright. It took my brain a few more seconds to put words together in sentences.

"No. No he just questioned me for hours. He was scary, but he didn't hurt me." I quickly replied as soon as I could.

Nori's relief was so evident that it surprised me. It was rare to see him so obviously displaying his emotions. He inhaled deeply and slowly calmed himself. Hadn't we been in such a tense situation, I would have found it funny to see that his mood affected both mine and Fili's so much. As soon as Nori was calmer, Fili and I relaxed. It really was odd.

"How do you know him?" I repeated and Nori glanced at me.

"I happened to have met him…several times. He used to live in Dunlands." He said at first and then added. "He's the one who ambushed me last year."

It took me maybe a minute to put things together and I gasped loudly once I did.

"The…his weird club is." I stammered. "It's that thing who did…he did this to you." I gestured at Nori's chest and saw him nod grimly.

"Aye. I barely escaped last time. He's dangerous. Really dangerous." Nori spoke in a low tone. "His group used to pillage and raid travellers in southern lands. It was already a surprise that he followed me so far north when he attacked me. You're sure he's the man who attacked Gorm?"

"There's no mistaking him." Fili said with a frown.

"I remember him perfectly." I muttered, agreeing with the young dwarf.

Nori swore lowly in Khuzdul and frowned.

"Then it's more than likely that his group is behind all the recent attacks." He groaned.

"But he's here and there has been no attack in this area." Fili commented.

Memories of my old world flashed through my mind. Now wasn't really the time to think about TV-shows I would never see anymore, though there might be some truth in what had been said in some of them.

"If they are behind the attacks on our caravans, it might make sense they don't attack us in the area they reside in." I said before explaining further. "If they live here, they won't attack caravans around this place, simply because like this we won't suspect anyone from this area. Thus they are protected, somehow, from our suspicions."

In any case that didn't matter much right now. It didn't help us either. I had no idea what would be the better course of action for us. Should we stay here for the night? He hadn't seen us so he couldn't harm us. But wouldn't it be better to leave quickly, using the darkness of the night as a protection? We could quickly go back to Thorin's Halls and tell the other about our findings. That way, the dwarves could come back and surprise him here, hopefully capturing him too.

"You said you met him several times?" Fili asked, breaking my trail of thoughts.

"Aye. I bought information from him. None of them were useful though."

"Why did they ambush you?" I asked him with a frown.

If Nori paid them, it didn't make sense they would try to kill him.

"Each piece of information he sold was expensive and useless. I got tired. When I had the opportunity to earn some money on their back I agreed. I stole back something they had taken from a rich merchant of Lunetown."

"How could they know it was you?" I wondered.

"They went back to Lunetown, and killed the merchant after forcing him to reveal my identity." Nori shrugged as if it were perfectly evident.

My eyes widened at that and I shook my head while Fili voiced exactly my thoughts.

"Are you saying that you were hired to steal it back?"

Nori shrugged and didn't answer, clearly concentrating on the matters at hand. That probably was wiser. Still, it wasn't something I had expected to learn. I knew Nori was a thief and would probably have guessed it was the reason behind most of his injuries. But this was different. He had been hired. I was still pondering on that when Nori spoke.

"We'll stay here tonight and we'll leave early in the morning."

"What about the leather and skins?" I couldn't stop myself from asking.

"I don't care about those. Right now my first objective is to get the both of you back home safely. We have to let Thorin know that the mercenaries attacking us are hiding here too." Nori answered sharply.

His tone softened a bit when he looked at me and then glanced at Fili.

"You both should sleep. I'll take the first watch. Fili you'll take the second. We'll leave before sunrise."

Fili nodded and threw his cloak on the bed closest to the window, covering the dirty sheets and lying on his cloak instead. In a matter of minutes the dwarf was softly snoring. It would never cease to amaze me to witness how quickly Fili could fall asleep. Still, at that moment I had other things to think about. I turned toward Nori who was still standing in the middle of the room, staring at the wooden floor with a deep frown.

I slowly made my way to him and gingerly put my arms around his waist. The fact that he let me hug him was quite telling; Nori knew how much I had been scared and needed him now. He embraced me strongly with one arm, his other hand still holding his dagger.

"You should sleep Mizimul." He whispered against my temple.

"I don't think I'll be able to." I murmured so lowly I wondered whether he'll hear. "I'm scared."

"I won't let him go near you. I'll protect you."

I tightened my hold on him and nodded. I knew that. But I still believed I wouldn't be able to sleep right now.

"Can't we leave now?" I breathed out.

I wanted to be as far away from that man as possible.

"He'll probably see us if we leave now. And I know you're tired. You need to rest."

I couldn't sleep. Not when I knew that the man who had almost killed Nori, Bofur and Fili was just here, laughing and drinking. I clenched my teeth and hid my face in Nori's neck. His braided beard was brushing against my cheek but I didn't mind. I actually like the slight ticklish feeling it caused. Nori slowly brought the hand that was on my waist to the back of my head. Then he kissed my temple and whispered in my ear.

"Rest, Umzam. I'll stand guard."

I inhaled shakily before I stepped away from him. Immediately I felt less secure, less warm. Lonely. Without looking at him I nodded and walked to the second bed where I lay on my spread cloak, just like Fili. I forced my eyes closed and swallowed back the lump in my throat. Anxiety wouldn't leave me, even though I was probably quite safe at the moment.

Sleep was rather hard to find that night but in the end my tiredness won over my fears.

* * *

><p>When Nori gently woke me, I immediately remembered the previous evening's events. My level of anxiety rose suddenly and I sat up in a jolt, almost head butting Nori in the process. With a quick glance around I calmed a bit. Nori was near me and Fili was standing close by. Both were fine and there was no sound around. There was only one candle to provide a dim light in our room, but it was enough to see the sombre expressions on the dwarves' faces.<p>

"We're leaving now. Drink and eat a bit quickly." Nori instructed and I nodded, eager to leave this place.

I grabbed the old piece of bread he gave me and ignored the bland taste. Now wasn't the time to think about gourmet food. Not fifteen minutes had passed when we stepped out of our room.

The inn was eerily silent and I didn't like it one bit. I guessed it should have been a good sign, but this absence of sound only made me more nervous than I already was.

We were walking in a line. Nori coming first and I was in the middle. Both Nori and Fili had unsheathed their weapons and were obviously ready to fight. Unthinkingly I reached for the beads that lightly grazed my neck and chin. Grabbing the one offered by Balin and Dori a while ago, I silently tried to gather some courage from the cold stone.

It did work a bit and I silently took my staff and held it with one hand, carefully avoiding hitting anything with it. Now really wasn't the moment to be clumsy.

When we arrived in the large dining room downstairs, I was relieved to see that it was completely empty. Quickly I followed Nori to the main door.

Only when the dwarf muttered a curse did I understand that something was wrong.

"What is it?" Fili muttered so low that I barely heard him.

"There're three locks on that bloody door." Nori groaned annoyingly in answer.

Fear filled my heart.

"How are we going to leave?" I whispered while lightly grabbing Nori's coat.

The thief gave us a small reassuring smirk before he grabbed something from one of his numerous pockets. In a second he was concentrating on the highest lock, inserting two thin pieces of metal in it and softly turning them. He was concentrating on it intently and I realized he had mostly been annoyed by what he considered to be a waste of time.

Fili and I were completely befuddled as we watched Nori calmly pick each lock at a time. It didn't seem to give him too much trouble either and soon enough, we were outside.

The night air was cold but none of us minded that. Thankfully the sky was clear and the moonlight was bright enough to allow us to see. I sighed in relief once I got out of this awful inn.

I felt as if we were out of troubles already.

I probably shouldn't have. This false sense of security wasn't good at all in our situation. Thankfully Fili and Nori weren't caught by it and they were clearly attentive to our surrounding.

Even though we were outside now, we still tried to be quiet. The atmosphere in the dirty town was getting creepier as minutes ticked by and we slowly made our way through empty streets. There was no light save for that of the stars and moon in the sky. There was no noise whatsoever save for the ones we made involuntarily. I found out quickly that Nori wasn't guiding us towards the town's entrance. It was probably smarter as the wooden doors were probably closed and guarded at night. Nori was probably hoping to leave this place as quietly as possible. I had no idea in what direction we were going though. There was a wooden wall surrounding this town, hence explaining the use of a door at one side of it.

Still I followed the thief blindly, just like Fili, because the both of us trusted him completely.

After all, if there was one dwarf who could get us out of this town in the middle of the night, it was Nori.

We turned around the corner of one of the furthest houses and walked through the small garden. We were finally facing this wooden wall and I had no idea what Nori wanted to do now. Surely he didn't think to climb it. I knew without a doubt that I wouldn't be able to do that. I anxiously waited for his explanation.

Instead of talking to us, Nori crouched near the wall and put his ear against the wood.

Fili and I glanced at each other. We were both speechless and uselessly waiting for something to happen.

I was starting to think about terrible scenarios in which the men would find us and kill us on the spot. It wasn't good for my mood and worse still for my nerves. I looked up and around. The emptiness and darkness should have reassured me. It meant no one was here to stop us from running away. But I wasn't reassured in the least. The shadows were menacing. The quietness was ironically too loud in my ears.

Suddenly I reached for Fili and grabbed his tunic.

Immediately he looked at me.

It wasn't hard to realize I was simply getting too nervous.

Kindly he smiled at me and stepped closer. His presence wasn't as soothing as Nori's, but Nori was otherwise occupied. Right now the thief was lightly tapping the wood panels with one knuckle. He was clearly looking for something, but I had no idea what that could be. Finally after what seemed like an eternity a small creaking sound broke the eerie silence and my eyes instinctively looked for what had made that noise.

Nori was a bit further, he had walked down the wall, and he was now pushing lightly one wood panel. Several of those creaked and as Nori pushed a bit more, I could see the hole it created in the wall. We would be able to pass through.

I smiled.

Trust the thief to know about such things.

Fili and I quickly walked to him and Nori gestured for Fili to go first.

Soon the blond dwarf had disappeared to the other side of the wall and I didn't waste any time following him. While I passed next to him, I exchanged a glance with Nori. I smiled softly at him and he nodded. He was clearly focused on his task but he winked at me. I felt better just seeing that and quickly ducked my head to pass through the small passage.

Fili was a few steps away, looking around. As we waited for Nori I did the exact same thing.

The wall was in my back and I was facing a dark forest that was maybe ten or twenty metres away from the wall. In between it was a simple grass field with here and there taller grass and small bushes nearby the forest trees.

I heard a creak and a thud behind me and turned to see that Nori had followed us and closed the way, letting the wood panels slide back in their place.

"We're going to go through the forest. We won't stop much until late tonight. We have to be careful and walk fast, alright?" Nori said looking at Fili and me in turn.

"You think they'll try to find us?" I swallowed thickly at the idea of being tracked once again.

"Yes. If only because we're dwarves and disappeared in the middle of the night."

I took a deep breath.

Alright.

I was with Fili and Nori. I was safe. I could deal with this. Nori and Fili wouldn't let anything happen to us. They were strong and I knew that Nori might not be a warrior but he was still one of the best users of twin daggers of Thorin's Halls. That had to count for something. I was the weaker link of the chain, but I had already survived through the exact same situation once, there was no reason why I couldn't now.

"Amelia." Nori's voice caught my attention immediately. "I want you to hide this, take it."

I looked at what his hand was holding and my eyebrows rose in surprise. It was yet another dagger, though this one didn't resemble those I had been gifted recently or the one that was already hiding in my boot.

"But I already have three of them." I whispered.

"I want you to hide this one where it'll be easy for you to grab it." Nori was serious and I relented easily.

I took the blade.

It was really light and small. It was just the size of my hand. It wasn't a dagger but a knife. I had seen some of those when I trained next to the other dwarves, but very few of them used those weapons. Nori and Fili were probably among the few who did. It was a throwing knife. Fili had once trained while I observed him and I had seen how he held it. I had been impressed to see the dwarf almost reaching the centre of all the targets he had aimed at. I had no doubt that Nori was even better at throwing those.

"Where should I hide it?" I whispered.

"It has to be a place where you can easily reach it, but where it absolutely won't be seen." Nori explained in a low voice.

I nodded and thought for a short while.

In the end I looked at the small sheath and pressed my fingers against one of my beads. I smiled. I always wore the leather bracelet that Dori had offered me a while ago. It wasn't really a bracelet as the leather band was rather large. I quickly fumbled with the small leather cords that held it and after a few minutes I managed to attach the small blade with it. The metal of its handle was pressed against my skin and the point of the blade was just a bit longer than the leather band. Still with my tunic's sleeves, it was perfectly hidden and even I could barely feel it against my skin.

I tried to move my wrist in different positions, and when I was convinced the blade wouldn't hinder my moves or cut me, I nodded to Nori.

We turned toward the forest. In the darkness we could only see a wall of shadow from where we were. It seemed rather ominous.

Still we walked towards it.

I adjusted my bag on my back so that it wouldn't annoy me or hit me as we jogged more than walked.

Thankfully Nori's training had been so hellish that it didn't seem too difficult now to face such a situation.

I knew I could jog like this for hours with little to no break.

I was holding tightly my wooden staff. I wouldn't have to use it. At least not anytime soon and maybe not at all if we were lucky, but I still felt better with the cold wood against the skin of my palm.

We were quickly crossing the field.

The dark forest seemed to be both an enemy and an ally right now.

As we were about to reach the trees' protection, I heard a weird whooshing noise.

My brain barely had the time to wonder where this noise was coming from that I felt Fili and Nori each grab one of my arms. At the same time they yanked me brutally, forcing me to stop my course and step back.

It hurt my shoulders.

I had to bit my lip to avoid yelping.

When I saw a thin stick that protruded from the ground exactly where I had been a second before, I realized that the dwarves had just saved my life.

Who was firing arrows at us?

My eyes widened in shock and I took a few stumbling steps back. Nori and Fili placed themselves at the same time between me and the trees.

I held my breath as I saw several shadows slowly making their way towards us. They were facing us, stepping out of the tree line. I quickly made the count. There were five of them, including the archer that was recognizable easily with the bow he held snugly at his side. I did the maths. I didn't doubt that Nori and Fili could hold their ground against two opponents at the same time. The only unknown was whether I'd survive long enough against one of them for either of the dwarf to come to my help.

I slowly grabbed my staff with both hands.

I knew the feeling of the smooth, cold wood under my fingers. I took a deep breath and let the known sensation soothe me. It would be nothing but a spar.

A simple spar. In the dark. On uneven ground.

Against someone who probably wanted me dead.

Oh Mahal…could you please help me survive this night?

Maybe it wasn't such a good idea to beg, but right now I was a bit on the edge.

The men came closer but stopped several steps away. No one moved or said a word for a little while. Then one of the men took one more step. My gaze immediately followed his moves. I felt my muscles tense and my grip on my staff strengthened.

It was one of the men who spoke first. I couldn't see their faces but I guessed it was the one who had come closer to us.

"You won't go further dwarves."

After some time, Nori decided to answer in a cold tone.

"And why is that?"

"Because there's someone who wants to talk to you." Another voice snapped.

After that there was a long minute of utter silence. I didn't know what was going to happen. I had no idea whether Nori and Fili would act and attack soon. It didn't take long to guess that if 'someone' wanted to talk to us, then more men would soon pop out of the dark. We had to act or we would be fighting against terrible odds. I had no doubts we would fight. And I somehow knew that Nori and Fili were hesitating because of me.

I swallowed and inhaled slowly before exhaling the air through my mouth. Taking one of the defensive stances I had learned I whispered so low that only the dwarves could possibly hear.

"I'm fine."

In a second, the situation changed.

Silence and immobility turned into utter chaos.

The signal for this change was a single, swift move from Nori that was immediately followed by a gurgling yelp and a dull thud as the archer fell on the ground. Well, the numbers seemed already much better.

I saw two men unsheathe their swords as they shouted and ran towards Nori. The two left each chose a target. The one who went towards Fili clearly was unluckier than the one who ran in my direction.

During a second everything seemed to freeze around me. I let panic overtake my heart. I was going to die here. I would die in a pathetic, painful way in the middle of a field near a disgusting town. I would die stupidly because I was weak and this world seemed rather harsh with the weak people.

A bellowing shout brought me out of this dangerous daze.

"Khayamu!"

That was Nori's voice. That was Khuzdul. I smiled devilishly. I didn't understand this, but it seemed to bring back some courage in my heart. When the man arrived upon me, I was ready to spar. Because it was only that, a spar, and if I could last against Bifur when he went crazy, I could last against a stupid, stinking man who didn't even properly hold his sword. Even though I had never held a sword, I had observed warriors often enough to know that this guy fought like a pig.

But his blade would kill me just as well if it hit.

So I focused on what I had been taught.

Stay focused. Stay aware. Stay alive.

The man slowed down as he arrived closer and seemed to appraise me. I should have felt offended by his derisive snort when he looked at me and saw that my only weapon was a wooden staff. But well, at the moment I had other things in mind than being offended and I used the time he took to mock me to remove the backpack that would surely have hindered my movements. I then waited for him to move first. I knew I was at a disadvantage here. First, this man was taller than me. There was no questioning it as I barely reached the middle of his chest. Second he was swinging a sword at me and I was sure the wood from my staff would last long against cold steel. Third, if I were to use my twin daggers, my size and lack of strength would put me in greater danger.

I sidestepped quickly when I saw him swing in the direction of my head.

After a few missed blows, the man started to get angry. For my part I was heartened by one thing; I was quicker than him. As soon as I realized that I kept on dodging but now I used my reflexes to hit him each time he missed. It didn't take me long to understand this man wasn't a good fighter. He would let his body entirely open when he tried to hit me. Successively I managed to avoid his blows and hit his arms and shoulders.

All of this was happening rather quickly. I knew barely a few minutes had passed since the start of the hostilities.

I used a second to assess the situation around me instead of hitting the man's wrist.

The man fighting Fili was having trouble avoiding the blond dwarf's twin swords. It reassured me to see that the taller being was being forced to move back and defend itself as Fili was attacking him mercilessly.

I avoided another blow and hit my opponent's right knee, ignoring the insults he swore at me, and glimpsed in Nori's direction. The thief had already disabled one of his enemies; the man lay lifelessly on the ground. The second one was apparently rather evenly matched with the dwarf but Nori was quick on his feet and a master with his twin daggers. Soon the man would tire while the dwarf would still be as fine as when he started to fight.

Dwarves were more resistant and enduring than men and that was an undeniable advantage.

My own opponent was furious.

His face was a mask of hate and viciousness. His blows became less predictable and more frantic as he tried harder than ever to hit me.

I didn't have time to retaliate anymore.

I could barely dodge the flurry of blows that were aimed at me.

The man was swinging right and left and I felt true fear when I saw the arc drawn by his sword come closer to my face. I jumped backwards trying to raise my arms to at least slow his movements a bit. I wasn't fast enough.

The tip of his sword was approaching my head in a deadly move at an incredible speed.

At first I felt nothing as I stumbled backwards.

My eyes were locked on the point of the man's sword. My heart thumped loudly against my ribcage.

There was blood on it.

Only then did I realize my left cheek was stinging. My breath became suddenly ragged and my eyes widened in fear while my hand started to tremble.

He had managed to hit me. He had touched my face. Had I been one inch closer to him I would be dead. Had I been half a second late to jump I would be dead.

Adrenaline coursed through my veins, overflowing my whole system.

The man smirked and jumped forward.

His moves were more precise suddenly, he was faster too.

I could only yelp in surprise when I felt the cold steel graze my biceps.

My ears rang when I heard his gruff laugh. I wasn't a dwarf. I was getting tired. The lack of proper sleep, the fear and anxiety that had eaten my nerves, all of it was taking its toll on me right now. My stance wasn't so precise. My moves weren't so quick. I was going to get killed by this stinking man if I couldn't suddenly find a solution.

As my brain went in overdrive to try and find something that would help me, my body kept on reacting to his attacks. I finally understood what Dwalin had meant when he had once said that those spars were important to help my body learn automatism. I managed to hit the man's wrist once more before my luck abandoned me.

I slipped.

I stupidly fell on my back, hitting the ground heavily. All the air was forcefully expulsed from my lungs as I rolled away from the man's blade. It hit the ground a few inches away from my face and I struggled to stumble back up. My staff was still on the ground. The man's smirk grew cruel as he took one slow step towards me.

Not even registering that I was gasping for air I let my hands grab the handles of my daggers. The man's arm was already raised and starting his deadly descent towards me when I swiftly unsheathed the two blades and managed in extremis to bring them in front of my face. Sidestepping I used the twin weapons to deviate the course of the blade. It hit my shoulder instead of my head with its flat part and I was glad for it. The force of the blow resonated in my bones and I stumbled once more though.

I was exhausted.

My legs were starting to shake now.

His next blow was so strong that it forced me to drop my left dagger. The right one had almost followed it. The man was eyeing me with so much hate that I shuddered. His last swing wasn't as strong, but it brought me to my knees nonetheless.

I gasped loudly as I gripped tightly to the handle of my right dagger. I was trying to stand back up as the man prepared to deliver the last blow.

I was going to die.

He laughed as he raised his hand and witnessed my pitiful attempt to stagger away.

In a second his mean glare turned into a surprised and shocked stare.

I blinked at the sudden change in the man's behaviour.

And in half a second he spluttered dark blood all over his front and fell to his knees while trying to turn. As soon as he was down to his knees, I saw a hand grab his hair from behind and a bloodied blade press against his throat. In one swift move the man's throat was slit and blood gushed from the wound. The hand released its hold and the lifeless body fell to the ground with a thud. His sword was next to him and my blood was soon covered by his.

My heart was pounding.

I looked up to see Nori precipitating towards me. He knelt at my side and I saw him raise his hand to my face. He didn't touch me though. His fingers lingered a hairbreadth away from the cut on my cheek and his eyes were riveted on it.

"Mizimul" Nori breathed out.

Even through my half panicked state I could see he was about to lose it. It didn't take a genius to understand that Nori was shocked to see me hurt. I had almost been killed for the second time right under his eyes. I was still terrified. Then another thought breached through the fear and shock that froze my mind. I was alive. I had survived my first, real fight.

I locked my gaze in Nori's grey eyes and with a speed that surprised even me, I hugged him tightly.

"Oh Mahal…Oh Mahal…" I whispered repeatedly. "Oh Mahal I'm alive. Oh thank God, thank Mahal."

Only a second later did I realize that Nori was hugging me quite strongly too. I opened my eyes to see Fili coming closer to us. He seemed unharmed. Nori seemed fine too. I was relatively unscathed. Thank Mahal we were all safe. I swallowed back relieved tears and whispered in Nori's ear before Fili could come closer.

"Nori"

My still troubled mind, the exhaustion or maybe both were probably the cause of my next move. Quickly I turned my head and pressed my lips against Nori's jaw. It was a bit odd to feel his beard under my lips. And even though it all happened in a second, the feeling lingered on my lips as I quickly leant back and stood up. I staggered a bit before engulfing Fili in a hug too. I didn't register the fact that Nori was frozen on the spot. I hadn't seen his shocked face or his wide eyes either. Right now I was overjoyed by simply being alive and safe with my two friends.

"Amelia, I'm glad you're alright." Fili murmured before his eyes travelled from my cheek to my arm. "You're hurt."

"I'm fine, it's simple cuts." I turned to Nori who was only standing up now. "What should we do now?"

"We leave quickly before their friends arrive." Nori managed to say though he was clearly disturbed by something.

Fili and I immediately looked around to find our bags. I asked the dwarves to help me find my two weapons too. Their eyes were better than mine, and Fili's were very good even for a dwarf.

I didn't know how long the fight had lasted but I was exhausted.

Slowly I made my way towards where I could see the bulking form of my bag.

It was probably because I felt so tired at that moment that I didn't pay attention to what was going on around me. I had this very strange feeling that even though my body was there, my mind wasn't entirely.

While Nori and Fili were cleaning their blades, my mind drifted slightly away from the bloody display of corpses lying around. It was weird to feel my brain completely disconnect from the reality. Those forms I could see lying on the cold ground had been alive and well a few minutes ago. The world was painted in shades of greys thanks to the moonlight. The blood was already being absorbed by the ground, yet I could see the darker puddles under the dark bodies.

I didn't avert my gaze.

My mind objectively knew that they were dead and that Nori and Fili had killed them. But I didn't really care about it all. It was rather strange to feel so detached of everything.

Was it only my exhaustion that made me like this?

Was I simply desensitized to this world's cruelty?

Was it because they had attacked us?

Seeing these men lying lifeless didn't even bother me. I didn't feel anything about them. I wasn't angry or hateful. I wasn't scared or hurt. I didn't even feel the need to help them. That truly wasn't ethically right. I was looking at them as someone might look at dead plants; the sight is somewhat pitiful but easily forgotten.

I crouched to grab my bag and quickly checked that nothing had fallen from it.

Nori soon arrived at my side.

"Are you ready to leave?" He asked urgently.

I simply nodded and he helped me to stand back up. I saw his eyes trail over the cut on my cheek and I couldn't help but feel embarrassed. I froze when I felt his fingers lightly graze my skin. His touch was as light as a feather. I blinked before looking at him. My heart was pounding in my chest and I wondered whether Nori could hear it.

When our eyes met, I felt my heart rate falter. His grey eyes were somehow able to stop time around me. It was frightening. It was thrilling. But it wasn't really the right moment for this.

Nori held my gaze with his for a second more.

Then reality hit back.

Fili jogged to us and handed me my weapons. I quickly sheathed my dagger and grabbed my staff. As soon as I held it Nori quickly gestured us to follow him and we started to run at a slow and steady pace in the forest. It was harder for me. I could barely see where I was putting my feet.

Thankfully Nori was right next to me, and each time I was stumbling he would caught my arm. Fili was on my other side. Each of them would regularly look behind them. Personally I was trying to avoid thinking about the other men. Besides, I needed to concentrate on the ground and my feet.

I didn't know how long we ran.

To tell the truth it wasn't as if we were sightseeing. I was once more glad that Nori had been so serious during my training. Even if we were running, I was barely tired. My heart rate was high but steady, as was my breathing. It couldn't be more different than the last time I had run away in the woods. If I remembered correctly, it was with Kili.

The bigger problem I had right now was that the trees were preventing the starlight to come through. The further we ran, the less I could see. I could only distinguish general shapes around and it was all in shades of grey. It wasn't really ideal. And because I could barely see a thing, what was supposed to logically happen, happened.

My right foot caught on a root and Nori didn't have the time to catch me this time. My hand tightened its grip on my staff and I amortized my fall with my left one. I hit the ground painfully on my left side. The feeling of the heel of my hand hitting a rock made me wince. I bit my lip and took a deep breath.

"Nori. We can't go on like this." Fili whispered. "Amelia is as good as blind in here."

I didn't know why they whispered. Did they think that the men were already on our trail? Surely they couldn't. The night was pitch black. I couldn't see my own feet, there was no way men could follow our tracks right now. We had some time, right?

"Don't you think I know that?" Nori replied angrily. "But would you rather we get caught tonight?"

"She's going to break her neck! Can't you think of her?" Fili spat.

I knew I had to intervene. Fili was a bit out of line here. Alright, it was true I couldn't see much, but I wasn't about to break. I was stronger than before. I could deal with this situation. There was no need to use me as an argument against Nori.

The problem was, I wasn't quick enough to react and Fili had clearly said the wrong words. Nori was furious.

"What do you think will happen to her if these men catch her?" He stepped closer to Fili and glared at him. "It's because I think of her, and her only, that I'm pushing it right now."

"Right, and running in the dark in a forest is such a good idea." Fili sarcastically replied crossing his arms on his chest.

"Don't try to tell me what I should do to protect her lad, you're a century too young for that."

Fili's fists clenched before he uncrossed his arms, his face reflected his anger. I managed to stand at the perfect moment, just before he could find the words to retort.

"Alright. Both of you stop it." I snapped lowly. "Don't you two think we have enough problems for the moment? We don't need to deal with the two of you fighting over pointless things."

They ignored me completely and kept glaring at each other. I couldn't help but roll my eyes. I knew the both of them meant well, but they really weren't helping.

"Oh please, snap out of it!" I simultaneously hit each of them in the shoulder, wincing at the pain that shot from my left hand and arm with the sudden move.

That apparently was enough to break through their anger. If I had to make a guess, I would say that they were more nervous than actually angry. After all, the situation wasn't really ideal. We really had a knack to end up in trouble.

Nori looked at me and seemed to appraise me.

"Amelia, are you alright?"

I rolled my eyes and glanced at my left hand. It was bleeding and I had now yet another wound to clean when I'll have the opportunity. The cut on my cheek was stinging, especially each time I would talk. The movement would tug on the wound and the sting would turn sharp. I had more trouble with my shoulder, I knew I would at least have a bruise and the articulation was still a bit stiff after the blow I received. The cut on my arm was throbbing but the pain was rather dull unless I moved. The same could be said from the pain radiating from the heel of my hand. All in all I wasn't feeling that bad. Sore and tired, but alright.

"I'm fine. I can keep going, but it's true I can't see where I'm stepping that much."

Nori nodded and started to rub his forehead in an unusual display of worry and anxiety.

"Do you think the men would follow us during the night? They probably can't see any better than Amelia can." Fili voiced my own thoughts.

"I don't want to take any chance." Nori grumbled.

"Are you even sure they would try to catch us?" I then asked. "Last time, they ran away from Gorm and didn't try to follow us. From what I understood, each time they attacked a caravan, they ran away if they were losing."

"The situation is different." Nori sighed.

"What do you mean?" I frowned.

A feeling of dread started to pool in my chest. Until now Nori had seemed rather fine, he was in charge of the situation. Clearly something had changed. Was it the fact that the men had been outside the town that disturbed him so much?

"He clearly wanted to catch us. These men were waiting for us. I could bet that many others were hidden around the other exits. He wouldn't go to such extents if he didn't want to catch us."

"So you're saying that right now, he'll trail us as long as it's relatively safe for him?" Fili groaned.

"Aye. And we won't be safe until we reach the mountain paths." Nori nodded grimly. "He knows it's just the three of us. Unless there's a real obstacle to stop him, he'll try to catch us. He knows the risk is low for him, at least while we're far from the mountain. In a week or so, if he doesn't catch us, he'll leave."

I frowned. I could understand that the man wouldn't run away from Archet right now, it was logical. But I honestly didn't see how he could be a threat for us as we had been running away for quite some time now.

"But, we've a good head start. As Fili pointed out, they can't follow us during the night."

"Amelia." Nori looked in my direction. "They probably have horses or dogs. They won't hesitate to use torches either."

Oh damn. I hadn't thought of that.

I sighed. I was starting to consider going back in order to kill them all and be done with it. It was quite clear right now that this group was behind quite a lot of trouble in the whole area. We might not have any proof, but it seemed evident that these men were the ones creating so much trouble for the dwarves. Why did they? That was a question I couldn't answer. I had no idea whether they were attacking only dwarves or if they attacked humans too. Maybe I should have paid more attention to Balin's grumbling when he read his reports.

We needed to let the King know about them, about their whereabouts. Still I couldn't help but wonder; wouldn't they just disappear? The King and the other dwarves already knew there was a group that raided caravans. They already knew about the leader having a scar on the cheek. If we escaped and took the time to go back to the mountains, the men would have the time to leave and move to another location. Nori had said so himself; in a week or so, they would go. The problem would still be the exact same. The only difference would be we would once more ignore where they were hidden.

While I was thinking about this, Fili and Nori had calmed down and were now discussing what we should do next.

I hesitated a bit before talking.

It wasn't that I was shy about voicing my opinion. With Nori and Fili, there was no way I would be shy about such things. But I knew perfectly well that neither of them would like what I had to say. They would probably dismiss it entirely.

That didn't stop me from trying.

"Maybe we should go back to that town." I said hurriedly.

The two dwarves stopped talking entirely and seemed to be frozen for a second. Quickly though they reacted. Fili was the first one to voice his thoughts.

"Are you crazy?"

I could see that Nori was focusing his gaze on me.

"Amelia, what are you thinking?" He whispered to me.

It made me smile for a second. He trusted me enough to know I wouldn't say anything like that without reason.

"If we go back to the mountain, they will probably move away. You said it, they'll leave. We would have lost them once more." I said quickly, letting the words out of my mouth in a breath.

Fili was about to say something, but then he simply shut his mouth back and crossed his arms once more, tilting his head.

"She's right." He simply stated, though he didn't sound happy about it.

"You might be right, but that doesn't change anything." Nori replied calmly. "I won't lead you two back in there."

"But, Nori…" I tried to protest.

"You're already injured. Fili is our Prince and you're my brother's ward. There's no way I would lead you both into such a dangerous situation." Nori insisted.

"We're already in a dangerous situation. If we leave it like that, it won't be dangerous for us it will be dangerous for everyone. If we stop them now, then the caravans will be safer." I explained. "This means that Dori, Dwalin and all the other who follow the caravans will be safer."

Nori sighed loudly and mumbled something I didn't quite catch. I wasn't really playing fair. I was using his brother's safety against him. I knew perfectly well that no matter what, his brothers were more important than anything to Nori. It was the case with all the dwarves actually. Kin, family, those were the people they were the most loyal to. I knew that Fili would easily do anything if it meant that Kili would stay safe and uninjured. Just like I knew that Nori would do about everything he could think of if it meant he would be able to protect Ori and Dori.

My words had an obvious impact on the two dwarves. But Nori was more perturbed by them than Fili. In the end I wasn't being fair with him. I was asking him to choose between his duty and his family. He had to choose whose safety would come first. It was cruel, but I didn't do it to make him hurt. I was just persuaded that we couldn't leave a situation like that behind us. Too much was at stake. And if I were entirely honest, I wanted to get rid of these men too.

They were a threat to the dwarves. They attacked our caravans. I knew three dwarves had died already and five more had been severely injured during the various raids. It was only a matter of time before one of the dwarves I was close to would be injured as well. I wouldn't let that happen to Dori, Dwalin or any other if I could. I wasn't that close to Dwalin, but he was Balin's brother and I did appreciate and respect him. I didn't want him to die because of stupid bandits.

"I can't let either of you go back there." Nori finally said with finality in his voice.

"But…"

"Fili, do you think you could guide the both of you back to the Halls safely?" He continued without paying attention to my protest.

"Wait, what?" I frowned at his words.

"Nori, this isn't a good idea." Fili replied, shaking his head.

"Can you or not?" Nori insisted.

"We won't leave you behind!" I hissed while grabbing his sleeve.

My heart was pounding in my chest.

This dwarf truly was stupid. If he thought I would run away and leave him behind me, he really, really was stupid. The simple thought of abandoning him made my stomach twist painfully.

He brought his hand over mine and gently squeezed it. It felt as if it was my heart that he was squeezing in his hand.

"Amelia, you're right. I can't let these men go away. But don't ask me to take you with me. It's too dangerous."

The tone of his voice was soft, kind, and it hurt me. This idiot was tugging at my heart strings. How could I do something that would hurt him? He was using the exact same trick that I had just used against him.

I had no idea how long we had stayed here, but apparently we had lost quite some time.

As I was about to reply, Fili startled and took a step to get closer to us.

"Wait." He whispered lowlier than before. "I think I just saw some light."

Oh please, couldn't we catch a break?

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><p><strong>AN: Thanks a lot everyone! All your reviews were very kind and helped me stay motivated ^^ I hope this chapter didn't disappoint anyone. Some of you had properly guessed who the man was :) I told you I hadn't forgotten about the men who had attacked Fili, Kili, Bofur and Amelia ^^**

**I'm really grateful for all those reviews and the support. **

**I want to add a quick note here about the updates.**

**As you obviously realized, they are much slower right now. I am NOT going to abandon this story. But right now big changes are happening in my life, I'm preparing to move away from my country and travel to the other side of the planet (literally, I don't think I could go further away) All the preparation, planning and everything related to that is taking me a lot of time. The chapters are long and it's taking me time to write, so the updates are probably going to stay slow and sometimes a bit erratic. I apologize for that, but I'm sure you all understand why I can't do otherwise.**

**On a more cheerful note, I'm letting you know that I started (FINALLY) the part with the quest. I've got a few chapters written, I still have to edit them though, so you will just have to be a little bit more patient. Things with Nori are going along as I wanted it to, so right now I'm quite happy with this story.**

**I know I'm being mean with Fili, Nori and Amelia...but well...you know me by now, I like to be mean with the characters :D**

**I'll try and update in a week/a week and a half. :) Please don't give up on me.**


	38. A Dangerous Midnight Bath

**Everything belongs to JRRTolkien, except OCs and the plot.**

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><p>As soon as Fili's words left his mouth Nori tensed.<p>

The three of us crouched immediately and Fili pointed in the direction he thought he had seen a flickering light. I held my breath and squinted my eyes. After maybe a few minutes I saw it too. A faint blinking light appeared and disappeared almost immediately.

"They're on our tracks." Nori breathed out.

I realized then only that I was holding on his hand. Unconsciously I squeezed it. I really didn't think that it would be good for any of us, if we were caught. Still, I personally had no idea what we could do. If we went on a mad dash through the forest we would make quite enough noise for them to trail us easily. And that was if I didn't break my neck after falling.

"Quick. Follow me." Nori whispered then.

He stood up and tugged at my arm. I didn't even hesitate as I jumped to my feet, grabbed my staff and followed him. My little injuries were already forgotten. I was trying my best not to stumble and not to make too much noise. Fili was just behind me and Nori didn't let go of my hand. I had no idea where the thief was leading us, but I could only hope he would find a place where we could hide. I wouldn't be able to avoid the men for long. I knew I would at some point trip and fall or something equally stupid.

I chanced a glance above my shoulder and almost cursed loudly.

The light was slowly but steadily getting closer to us.

We were jogging at a slow pace, and I knew it was only because I couldn't go faster than that without risking a noisy fall. I was slowing our escape. I hated myself at that moment. If anything happened to the dwarves, it would be my fault.

I didn't want that. I really didn't.

I held onto Nori. As I squeezed his hand tightly he quickly looked at me but I had nothing to say. I just didn't want to ever let go. I was just really scared that he would be hurt because of me. I would never forgive myself.

As we were making our way through the trees I suddenly realized that we were coming closer to something quite noisy. Something that actually could cover the sound we were making. At that moment, I felt Nori tug my arm slightly and we sped up. Concentrating on the noise instead of the burn in my lungs and legs, I could recognize such a sound easily. Running water. We were close to a river. And a big one, as much I could tell.

That probably was a good thing.

If the men had dogs, hopefully we would lose them as they couldn't follow our scent if we crossed water. Well, that was assuming that we could cross the river. It might be stupidly dangerous to try at night. Rivers were usually dangerous and tricky enough to cross during daylight. Diving in the stream at night might just be suicidal.

I was lost in my thought when we arrived at the riverbank.

Thankfully I could at least see a bit more here. There were fewer trees and the starlight was strong enough to bathe the river in a hollow light. The river was quite large. Its waters were dark and I wasn't sure I could actually distinguish the other side. Trees and bushes covered the bank giving it an inhospitable aspect.

Nori stopped for a second and seemed to ponder on our next course of action.

The logical thing was to cross the river. But even I could see it would be dangerous. The river bank was abrupt and there were bushes that fell on the river, there was even a fallen tree that hanged over the water a bit further downriver. Its dead branches created a net that had stopped other branches and dead leaves. I could already see that the water was flowing quickly and I could guess that the river was running deeply. It would be dangerous to attempt to cross. It would be dangerous not to do it.

I glanced over my shoulder and could see that the light of what could only be torches, was coming closer to our location.

"Quick. Follow me." Nori whispered as he stepped closer to the river.

I hesitated only for a second but it was enough for Nori to turn towards me and squeeze my hand.

"We won't cross. We're going to hide there." He explained in a whisper as he pointed toward the mess of dead branches and bushes that were stopped by the dead tree.

Nori quickly took my staff from my hand and handed it to Fili who nodded simply and took it. The thief was the first one to jump in the water. He didn't utter a sound but I just knew it would be cold. I looked at him. He turned to extend his arms toward me and I swallowed before quickly following him in the dark waters.

I had to bit my lip when I felt the cold bite of the river. It actually took my breath away for a few seconds as the freezing water splashed over my face. The water was coming up to shoulders once I stood. I couldn't even shiver at first. The cold was freezing my body and my blood. I was having trouble to move and stay upright as the strong current was threatening to take me away and my feet struggled to stand in the stones and mud that covered the riverbed. It was even harder to resist the current with my bag on my back. I heard a small splashing sound nearby and knew that Fili had jumped in. It didn't help me to react in any way though.

Nori was facing me and he seemed completely oblivious to the cold or the strength of the river. He placed his ice cold hands on my cheeks and forced me to look at him. His tone reflected his worries as he whispered urgently.

"Amelia. Breathe."

I wanted to. Obviously I wanted to, but the coldness of the water had shocked me and was making it difficult. My body was struggling to recover from this initial, brutal contact and breathing suddenly seemed like an impressive challenge. I managed to take a few shallow breathes but that wasn't good. As I felt that I was about to breathe a bit better again, I started to shiver violently in Nori's arms. My whole body felt growingly numb and I cursed myself once more. Now wasn't the time to suffer from hypothermia. I should have thought about it before I jumped. Running in the forest had made me sweat and my body was warm. Well, it had been warm. The river was obviously going to be cold. It should have been evident that I was going to brutally lower my body temperature by jumping in.

I felt Nori's arms around me as he gathered me closer to his chest, his cold, wet beard feeling like ice on my cheek.

I knew Fili was close too but was unsure of where he was exactly.

Why didn't they feel as cold as me?

Was it because they were dwarves? Damn, that wasn't fair.

"What's going on?" Fili whispered somewhere nearby.

"Go hide quickly. Under the bushes." Nori ordered instead of explaining anything.

I felt Nori was holding onto me as he moved towards the dead tree and I could see Fili's shape disappearing in the water from the corner of my eye. For a second I thought that he had just drowned and was about to say something, but then I heard his voice.

"Come, there's enough space under there."

My heart was starting to pound loudly against my ribcage. Fear made its appearance too. I was too cold.

From a corner of my mind I realized that Nori was slowly guiding me toward the dead tree. Hadn't he been here, I had the growing suspicion that I would have been swept away by the current. Once we arrived near the tree I felt him squeeze my waist. I hadn't even realized he was holding my waist until then. I hadn't stopped shivering and I was getting number as minutes ticked by.

"Mizimul, I'm sorry but we have to go underwater." He whispered in my ear.

He had to be joking.

I felt his lips against my temple, as he pressed a soft kiss on my cold skin. That didn't help my rapid heart rate.

"Take a deep breath and hold it."

Oh dear lord, he wasn't joking.

I sluggishly turned my head to look at him and met his eyes. He was serious about it. Slowly I nodded. I knew Nori wouldn't hide without me. I had to do this. I had to do it for him, for his safety.

I shakily took a deep breath and held it. Quickly, I felt Nori push me underwater. When my head was immersed I struggled not to let the air out of my lungs immediately. I felt two pairs of hands that yanked and pushed me but I was too cold to really process what was going on.

"Mizimul, breathe." I suddenly heard in my ear.

Breathe? How could I breathe underwater? As the words were being repeated I slowly recognized Nori's voice. I could trust him. I let out the air I had been holding. The shivers were getting stronger.

"Mahal, she's freezing." Another voice whispered.

I felt myself being held tightly against a strong body. I had water up to my chin now and I couldn't see anything around, though I knew my eyes were open. Was I in a dark place?

I felt someone's lips…no, Nori's lips, it had to be Nori's lips, on my temple once more. The person who held me, it had to be Nori, strengthened his grip on me.

"Mizimul, please…"

He sounded so worried.

I felt my head loll forward and my forehead suddenly rested against what I could only guess to be Nori's shoulder. I could feel the water splashing my mouth and nose, sending small shards of cold through my face.

"Nori..." I whispered in a shaky voice.

"Hold on for a bit Mizimul." He answered, holding me closer still.

I was freezing. I was so cold. I felt as if my body was trembling so strongly that it would be heard miles around.

After what seemed like an eternity, but was probably only several minutes, I saw some light pierce through the dead foliage. I tried to hold the shivers but it was a lost fight. My numb fingers tried to grab Nori's tunic but my limb were heavy as lead. I gave up while Nori held me tighter still. I was completely flush against him. I could feel his damp hair against my face.

The light grew a bit more until we could hear the noise of steps and voices.

I was struggling to focus and concentrate on something else than the cold.

My whole body was trembling against Nori and I could only hope that the noise of the river would cover any sound I could involuntarily make.

"Their track stops here!" One man said.

"They jumped in the river." Another one added. "They can't be far, those are looking really fresh. The ground is still wet from the splashed water."

I could distinguish the light of their torches. They were so close to us. Still I was too numb to feel fear. I heard their voices but didn't really understand the meaning. I was so cold.

So cold…

A violent shiver coursed through my spine. Almost immediately Nori's arms tightened impossibly around me and I felt his lips press against my temple. The soft kiss didn't make my heart beat any faster. I didn't even feel the usual spark against my skin.

"Damn dwarves." I heard someone spat really near to where we were hiding.

"It's the second time he escapes us. Someone cares to explain why?" A deep, gruff voice said.

Hadn't I been so cold, this man's tone would have made me shiver too. I knew this voice. I couldn't place how or when I heard it, my memories were becoming foggier as time slowly passed.

"We almost had him this time."

"Almost?" The same gruff voice said.

"We couldn't know that three of them would manage to fight of five of our men, Rod. Bert said there was a tiny woman with them." A calm voice explained.

"Damn that stupid innkeeper. Why couldn't he drug them?! Why did he wait to give me that information? I'll have to teach him …" The dangerous man, Rod, spat angrily.

Even through my muddied brain I could still guess that this Rod was their leader. A memory of the man with the scar crossed my mind and I wanted to whimper. I managed to stifle the noise against Nori's neck. He must have felt or heard it because one of his hands came to my cheek and he turned his head once more to press another kiss on my forehead.

His hands were cold but still warmer than the river. Though, I was starting not to feel it so much anymore. My body was barely shivering now. I was slowly starting to forget about the coldness of the water. I wasn't sure this was a good sign.

"What do we do?" Another voice said.

"You two, cross that river and try to find back their tracks." Rod ordered.

There was a second of utter silence. My eyelids were starting to feel a bit heavier and I was actually wondering whether I could just close them while I waited for them to leave. Surely it wouldn't be a big deal if I just closed them for a second?

"But…in this night?" One man started to protest.

"I don't know how to swim…" A second voice said shakily.

"Then you better learn quickly. Cross. Now." Rod spat.

"Rod, it might be better to…"

"Cross!" He snarled.

There was another short silence before I heard two splashes and immediately after I heard two voices shouting about the coldness and the strength of the current. Another angry order and the two other voices stopped. I heard some more splashes before one man whined in a trembling voice about the cold once more. Soon after, the whines were followed by the noise of struggles and someone's cry. Near our hiding spot I could hear men mumble and mutter. After a few more minutes I heard another cry for help that remained unanswered.

I felt my lip start to tremble against Nori's neck and his hand tangled itself in my hair.

Even through my numb mind I could guess that the two men had suffered from the same fate that would have befallen me hadn't Nori been there. There was no way I would have been able to cross that river through that cold. Knowing how to swim wasn't what mattered. The water was the threat, of course, but worse even that the strength of its current, was the icy temperature.

That man, that Rod had just lost two men stupidly.

"Useless." I heard him groan before his voice bellowed, piercing the night. "Oy dwarf! Don't you want another tip? This one will be free! That fucking necklace you want so much, it's around my neck! It's been around it for a good decade now! Come and get it coward!"

I felt Nori tense against me. His grip turned strong. He was frozen against me.

"Come and get it! You afraid? Stupid dwarf! Bloody midget!" He shouted for some long minutes, mostly insults and I stopped to listen.

I knew that those words were important, but I was so cold. So, so cold… I couldn't really understand what they were talking about.

I had no idea how long the men stayed on the river bank. I heard their leader, Rod, yell for quite some time before they finally went back in the town's direction. Quickly the source of light disappeared and I was left in darkness. Nori's presence was the only thing that managed to keep my mind anchored to the present. Somehow I knew I had to fight and that I shouldn't sleep. I had to stay awake, no matter how much I wanted to sleep right now, and Nori was somehow helping me. I focused on him. On him only. But oh Mahal, how I wanted to just sleep…

"Mizimul? Mizimul?" He whispered against my ear.

I tried to answer him, to reassure him while my shivers had almost entirely stopped. I could only manage to utter a disarticulated whimper.

"Mahal, we have to get her out of here."

"Here" This was Fili's voice.

I felt their hands grip my tunic as they pushed and pulled me, fighting against the river's strong current once more. I wish I could have helped them, but my limbs were numb. I was as good as a dead weight.

I heard some splashes and grunts and then Fili's voice came from a place above my head.

"Here, I'll pull her up."

"Be quick." Nori's anxious voice said.

I felt something grip me around my waist and guessed that Nori was trying to push me up. In the meantime, I felt hands grab my arms. I was torn away from the frigid water but the dry air didn't help me warm up. My wet clothes were clinging on my body, encasing me in an icy wet cocoon. My bag was heavier than ever. My hair clung to my cheeks. I was still weakly shivering from time to time while my eyelids were now slowly closing against my will.

I heard another grunt and splashes before two hands pressed against my cheeks.

"Mizimul. Mizimul! Look at me. Mahal, please look at me."

I heard the urgency in Nori's voice. I struggled and it was sheer willpower that made me open my eyes to meet his grey ones.

"No…ri…i" I muttered. "m co…old…"

"She's not shivering so much." Fili commented. "That's good, right?" He sounded worried.

A part of my brain wanted to tell him that it wasn't good. It wasn't good at all. But I couldn't. No matter how much this tiny, slowly disappearing voice in my head wanted to yell at him that no, it was good, quite the contrary actually, I couldn't.

Thankfully, Nori did.

"No. It's not. We have to remove her clothes. Do you have some drier clothes in your bag?"

I heard someone rummage in something while I felt hands struggle to untie the wet leather cords that hold my tunic together. Apparently it wasn't an easy task. I probably should have been embarrassed or ashamed. Maybe Nori was feeling like this at the moment. After all, he was currently stripping me and he was doing it in front of another dwarf too. Maybe it was lucky, but at the moment I could barely feel anything at all.

"I have only that shirt, but it's a bit damp … Erm… Should we really do that?" Fili seemed to hesitate.

"I'd rather have her furious at me, than have her dying on me." Nori snapped.

My mind was somehow registering what was happening around, though I really couldn't have reacted to anything even if my life depended on it. I did know that Nori had removed my hood, coat, leather tunic and was currently working on removing my cotton long shirt. I knew I was wearing nothing under it except for bindings around my chest. Danà had finally won and I had discarded my bra for those damned bindings.

When he finally removed my shirt there was a small lull. No one said anything or moved.

"We have to make her warm." Nori finally muttered.

"How?" Fili said in what I could describe as a strangled voice.

There was a short pause before Nori swore in Khuzdul and answered hurriedly.

"We can't light a fire. Those idiots might see it."

He swore once more before Fili cleared his throat and spoke.

"What about bo…body warmth?" He stammered a bit and there was another pause during which none of them spoke.

I was starting to fall asleep. I could barely stay awake. If they kept silent I wouldn't have anything else to anchor me to consciousness. I couldn't really understand their words, but the simple fact I could hear the tones of their voices was already enough to keep me awake. Especially Nori's. Right now I needed them to talk, to keep on talking, moving, doing anything really as long as it could help me focus on something. If my brain fell asleep, I wasn't sure it would do any good.

There was some shuffling near me and then I felt something warm against my skin. I didn't know whether it felt warm because it really was, or because I was just that cold.

"Try to light a fire, but hide it well. We don't want these men to see it." Nori's voice was really close to my ear right now.

Hadn't I been that cold I might have shivered from the sensation. As if it registered that thought, my body slowly started to shiver again sporadically.

"I'll take care of it." Fili answered Nori.

In the meantime I realized that there really was a source of warmth near me and I instinctively tried to come closer to it. I felt something encircle my waist while my chest was brought flush against the warmth's source. My head was resting on it too and I nuzzled my nose closer to it.

The warm thing seemed to tremble a bit as my cold nose pressed against it.

"Mahal…" I heard Nori mumble.

After a bit of time had passed, I started to shiver more and more. That was a good sign, my brain whispered to my foggy mind. It meant my body was starting to fight the cold, it meant it was starting to work again. I then felt something warm press against my back and rub circles on it. I had no idea how long it took for my brain to finally start to work normally again, but little by little I felt the fog that clouded my mind lift. It could have been minutes, it could have been hours, I had no idea of the passing time.

When I realized that the warm stuff I was now clinging to was actually Nori, I jolted. A strong blush started to burn my cheeks, and maybe that was good because it was helping me a bit. I felt my heart start to pound rapidly in my chest and my trembles lessened as I was feeling more embarrassed than ever. I didn't know what was more embarrassing, being in such a position with Nori, or actually admitting I rather liked it.

"Nori?" I whispered with an annoyingly squeaky voice.

"Mizimul? Oh thank Mahal…" He breathed out and I felt his arms tighten a bit around me. "How are you feeling?" He asked.

I hesitated a minute, I was trying to sort out my feelings between those I could voice aloud and those I should keep to myself.

"Cold. Tired too…"

My body reacted on its own and decided to snuggle closer to Nori.

"How long…" I started to ask but didn't finish my sentence, unsure of what exactly I wanted to know.

Nori cleared his throat once, then twice, before he finally replied.

"We stayed for a bit in the water, maybe twenty minutes or even more. We got you out at least half an hour ago, maybe even a bit more than an hour now."

So I had spent approximately one hour freezing, maybe more. I still had cold and wet breeches on, and my hair dripped water on Nori's back. The poor dwarf had to be freezing because of me. Strangely though, his body still appeared very warm to me.

"Why you…aren't you cold?" I forced myself to construct real sentences and it was alarming that such a simple one was actually hard to form in my head.

"You know that dwarves are more resistant than men." He replied softly.

I could still feel one of his warm hands rubbing my back. My eyes were closed as I let the feeling of being held by Nori warm my whole body. I was feeling better already.

"I managed to get some water boiling." Fili's voice suddenly popped out of nowhere.

"Maybe drinking warm water would help you?" Nori said, obviously speaking to me.

I struggled to focus for a minute and tried to think about which plant I had in my satchel. I wondered at that moment whether they were still dry or not. I probably mumbled that aloud because Nori answered my queries.

"The inside of the bags was partially protected. We should check."

I opened my eyes but the night was still too dark for me to see anything except some dark shapes around. I wondered then where Fili had lighted a fire, because I really couldn't see it.

"Here" The blond dwarf said. "Your satchel is damp, but the inside of the different pouches should be fine."

"Amelia, can you tell us which plant to give you?" Nori softly asked while one of his hands came to the top of my head.

I still had some trouble to keep my eyes open. I wasn't freezing anymore, but I was still shivering quite strongly. Drinking something warm would help. I concentrated for a while and finally breathed out a few words.

"Thyme, mint…Echi…Echinacea" My voice was still annoyingly weak.

"Mint I know." Fili said before adding. "But the other two…"

"Here, let me."

I couldn't feel Nori's hand on me anymore. After a few minutes though I heard he talk some more.

"That's thyme. And I think this one is Echinacea."

I felt him push me a little and I frowned at being torn away from his warmth. Then he placed something under my nose and talked to me.

"Amelia, is this Echinacea? Amelia, wake up. Focus."

I groaned slightly as he insisted. His voice was forcing me out of my doze. I was about to fall asleep when he gently shook my shoulders and repeated his question. I tried to glare at him, but then I realized that with my half opened eyes, it probably wasn't very efficient. I did notice that his hairdo was completely dishevelled, but that wasn't important.

He repeated his question once more, a small leather pouch under my nose. I breathed in and frowned. Why was he putting this here? Oh right… now it made sense why he was asking me that question. My frown deepened as I finally realized how muddled my brain was. I nodded at him and muttered while trying to enunciate properly.

"Yes…Echin…a…cea…" My teeth were chattering, rendering my speech rather difficult.

Immediately the pouch disappeared from under my nose and I was once more crushed against his chest. I smiled softly as I felt his warm skin under my cold fingers. I snuggled closer to him, not caring for anything else other than the fact that I was cold and he provided warmth.

"Are the clothes dry?" I heard Nori ask.

"No, but the damp shirt probably soon will." Fili answered but his voice seemed odd, as if he was annoyed or embarrassed.

"Bring it quickly. And the drinks too."

"Aye"

I sighed as Nori held me close. Slowly my mind drifted off and I was lulled in a half asleep state. I was only awoken from my peaceful slumber when Fili came back and both dwarves forced me to drink warm water were plants had infused. I felt the hot liquid warm me from the inside and I instantly felt a bit better. Soon after Nori helped me to put on a large cotton shirt before he took me in his arms again.

I could remember snuggling close to him as he placed me across his lap and I fell asleep.

* * *

><p>It was still dark when I woke up, but I could tell that soon, the sun would come up at the horizon. I first opened my eyes tiredly. I felt a bit odd. I was fine but really tired. Slowly the events of the previous night came back to me. I probably had slept only a few hours on Nori's lap. I looked at him and realized he was still asleep.<p>

His eyes were closed and his face only displayed a calm expression. His mouth was slightly open and I couldn't help but smile at the sight. He was … dared I say cute? His hair fell on his shoulders in a weird dishevelled mess and I realized for the first time how long it actually was. I had completely forgotten the situation we were in.

Slowly, gingerly, I raised my finger and lightly touched the tip of his nose.

He frowned in his sleep and I smiled some more.

It was so childish of me to do that, but I just couldn't help myself. I was tired and slowly processing the events of the night. I knew I had suffered from a light to mild case of hypothermia but right now I felt fine. I looked at my finger tips, they seemed normal. I would check my feet later on, but even now I could feel and move all my toes, or so I thought at least.

I blushed a bit at the thought that Nori had actually held me while I was only wearing my breeches and bindings. At that moment only did I realize that Nori wasn't wearing any shirt. I froze for a second before my eyes went to the place where my hand was touching his skin. I couldn't even try to stop the blush that crept to my cheeks.

I remembered how I had thought about his chest during that second night we had…spent together. Well, I had been right then. Nori was definitely what one could call a strong dwarf. I didn't even notice that my hand was slowly following the trail my eyes were doing. I grazed his skin, lingering slightly on the various scars I could see here and there, including the terrible one he had received the previous year.

I suddenly saw him shiver and I immediately removed my hand from his chest. I held my breath, a bit ashamed at my actions, while Nori's eyes slowly fluttered open. As soon as he was awake, his eyes found me and I smiled softly at the relief that was so evident on his face.

"Amelia…" He breathed out and squeezed my waist. "How are you feeling?"

"I'm fine, don't worry." A sharp sting in my cheek reminded me that I had been cut there, but I didn't pay any attention to it.

Without thinking I had placed my hand on his chest. I felt his muscles tense under my fingers and I stupidly blushed as I averted my gaze for a second. When I looked back at him, Nori was the one avoiding looking at me. Slowly I moved my hand away from him.

"Amelia, I…"

"Nori…"

We both talked at the same time and both stopped when we heard the other. There was an awkward silence until I cleared my throat and decided to ask him whose shirt I was wearing. I didn't actually care much about the answer, but it was the only question I could think of right now that seemed fairly neutral.

"Erm, Nori? This shirt is…"

He didn't let me finish and rather suddenly helped me to move away from his lap. I bit back a rude comment as he all but shoved me away. Just before he was about to stand he glanced at me. I was completely befuddled by this reaction.

"Amelia. I'm really sorry. I didn't know what else to do. I hope you can forgive me."

I blinked and tried to process his words when I saw him stand. Realizing he was about to leave I frowned. Alright, this felt a bit déjà-vu. I scrambled to my feet and staggered. Standing too quickly was probably not a good idea, I thought as I felt light headed. Immediately Nori's hands prevented me from falling and I grabbed his arms for support.

"Be careful." He breathed out.

I knew he was about to add something but I really didn't want to listen.

"Nori. Do you realize what you did last night?" I asked in a whisper, not looking at him at first.

I felt him tense under my fingers. Then only did I glance at him. He seemed embarrassed, ashamed. I resisted the sudden urge to whack his head only because I needed to be quite calm if I wanted him to listen to me.

"Amelia. I'm truly sorry. I didn't mean to embarrass you or shame you. Your honour is …"

"Forget my honour and all those silly notions for a minute Nori." I couldn't help but snap.

When he heard the tone I was using he finally looked at me. He was clearly surprised. Honestly, I understood that honour was important here. I liked this too. In my previous world, honour had been an old notion and not many people seemed to truly care about it anymore. Before I arrived there, honour had been something related to chivalry in my mind. It had been something I hadn't expected anyone to respect.

Here things were clearly different and usually I loved some of those differences, but right now, it was just plain stupid to react the way Nori did.

"Amelia, I…"

"Nori" I interrupted him. "Do you realize that you saved my life? I would have died from the cold if you hadn't done all this."

My voice wasn't snappish anymore. If anything it was sounding quite weak. I wanted him to understand so much. If anything was embarrassing, it wasn't the fact that Nori had stripped me, though it wasn't helping right now. Now, what embarrassed me was that I didn't mind that much… how complicated was I?

"You saved me once again, can't you see?"

I looked directly in his grey eyes. I was quite sure that many emotions were battling for dominance in my gaze as it was the case in his. I held my breath for a second when I saw the intensity contained in his eyes while his face didn't show much. Nori always seemed to have expressive eyes. I unconsciously tightened my grip on his arms while he squeezed my waist.

"Amelia, listen, such a situation…if people were to know about it…"

"I don't care about the people." I softly murmured tearing my eyes away from him as I felt tears threaten to pool in them. "They can think whatever they want, though I'm not sure how you expect them to learn about this." I added with a frown.

There was once more an awkward silence between the two of us. My heart was beating quite wildly in my chest. I inhaled slowly and looked down.

"Nori, I don't care what people think." I repeated. "I only care about what you think."

My voice had been so low that I wasn't sure he would hear my words, but when I felt him tense once more I knew he had. I closed my eyes and decided that, after saying this, I better kept going. The words had come out of my mouth on their own; I hadn't really wanted to say that aloud. Now it had been said though, I had to explain myself a bit. I had no choice.

"I know you don't care for me…" I started to say, attempting to let him know I knew he saw me as a family member, when he interrupted me.

"Amelia" His voice was hoarse and I looked once more in his eyes. "It's really not that. I…"

I didn't have the opportunity to know what he wanted to say as a loud sneeze startled me and I jolted away from Nori who reacted in much the same way.

Looking around I then heard another sneeze and finally saw Fili through the coming trees in our direction.

He was looking at the ground and probably hadn't realized that both Nori and I were already awake. I took the chance to glance at Nori just as he looked at me. He was frowning, and I wasn't certain what was annoying him right now. For my part, I knew I would have to talk with him at some point. I frowned too. I had spent quite some time trying to avoid talking about certain topics with Nori, but maybe that hadn't been the right path to follow. I probably should speak to him, a bit at least, and I had started already anyway.

The problem was, I didn't know what I should say.

I wasn't even sure about what I was feeling right now.

I knew I loved him.

A part of me thought it could be more than that.

Another part that it probably shouldn't.

I was human. He was a dwarf. We were family. I shouldn't even be thinking about feelings for him.

I didn't have the opportunity to think about this anymore though, because Fili finally saw us and spoke. At that moment I felt an odd mixture of relief for the interruption and annoyance. His expression when he saw me helped me forget about both feelings and I couldn't help but smile tiredly after seeing his own tired grin. I had completely forgotten about the cut on my cheek until then. I would have to check it, and the bruise on my shoulder too. Gingerly moving it, I was reassured that nothing at least had been broken. All my muscles were sore though, especially those in my arms.

"Amelia! Thank Mahal you're awake!" Fili said before sneezing once more.

"Are you alright?" I enquired worriedly.

"The night was a bit cold, that's all." He answered dismissively.

I rolled my eyes. Men. Was he trying to appear strong? I sighed tiredly.

"Can we build a fire?" I asked before frowning. "Didn't…didn't you light a fire last night?"

I wasn't sure of my memories. Most of it was blurry. I could remember mostly impressions, some events too…but even then, I wasn't sure whether I had dreamt anything, or maybe even hallucinated. Clearly I hadn't dreamt the sudden warmth that had cocooned me, nor had I hallucinated when the two dwarves had more or less forced me to drink something warm.

I had no memories of a fire, but how could have I drank something warm otherwise?

I looked at Nori when he was the one to answer.

"Fili did. But it was a small one."

"We didn't want it to be spotted by the men. So I went further upstream and dug a hole to place the wood. Like this the light would be less easy to see." Fili explained between two sneezes. "It didn't really provide any warmth."

I nodded.

In the end I had been lucky once more. The two of them had completely forgotten about themselves and had tried their best to help me. Now was the perfect time to repay the favour. I was really tired, but not incapacitated.

"Is it safe to have a bigger fire now?" I asked Nori.

"We should try to find a better spot to stay, but yes, it should be fine. The men won't come back here."

"I found a small clearing maybe half a mile away, upstream." Fili informed us before showing what he had hunted. "And we'll have rabbit for breakfast."

That did cheer me up a bit. As quickly as possible we gathered our damp belongings; Nori and Fili had put them out of the bags to try and dry them. Then we left. The clearing wasn't far, and it truly was a charming place. The forest overall was far less grim looking when the sun shone bright in the sky. I could see many varieties of flowers, some I knew, and many I didn't. But now wasn't the time to be curious.

Nori didn't take long to gather wood and light a bright and warm fire. Even though the day was quite warm, the three of us were quite happy to sit as close to the flames as possible. I cooked the rabbit in a stew and quickly prepared an infusion for all of us to drink. I knew Nori seemed to be fine, but I didn't want to take any chances. I wouldn't take bets about Nori's health.

Fili seemed really grateful for the hot beverage and Nori didn't complain either. All in all we were rather silent while we waited for the rabbit stew to be ready.

I was still really sleepy and I didn't fight it when my eyes slowly closed for a bit. I was awoken this time by Nori who gently shook my shoulder.

"Amelia, you need to eat."

I looked at him, he seemed just as tired as I felt. Fili wasn't much better. I took the bowl of stew he handed me and started to eat a bit.

"What are we going to do now?" I wondered aloud, looking at them.

"We can't stay here long." Nori answered. "We'll leave for Thorin's Halls as soon as possible."

"What about the thieves?" I asked with a frown.

"What about them?" Nori's voice was completely different than his usual tone.

My brows furrowed some more. I had this hunch that I was forgetting something quite important. The issue with the thieves was the same as what it had been during that night. I was persuaded that if we left, the thieves would disappear and would remain a danger to the dwarves. But I couldn't shake away the feeling that something else had happened. Something that I shouldn't forget.

There was a tense silence until Fili cleared his throat and decided to speak.

"Didn't you find it odd yesterday?"

My eyes focused on the blond dwarf. He was pensively scratching his beard and I saw from the corner of my eye that Nori had tensed.

"What was odd?" I asked Fili.

"Nothing." Nori snapped at the same time as Fili answered.

"This man, he was talking as if he possessed something that belonged to us, or at least something we were looking for."

I froze.

From my hazy memories I remembered an angry voice that was shouting. The words were unclear, but now that I concentrated on it…hadn't he said something about a necklace?

I glanced at Nori. I could see it now. He seemed torn. There was no other word to describe him. He was staring at the ground between his feet. His brows were furrowed and his fists clenched together in front of him. When he finally looked up and our eyes met I held my breath.

"He has the necklace?" I breathed out without really realizing it.

"Yes! He talked about a necklace." Fili exclaimed joyously. "Wait. You know about this necklace? Amelia is it yours? How did he get it?"

I ignored Fili's questions completely and stared at Nori with disbelief. Sadness and rage were clearly battling in his eyes and that made my heart hurt.

"Did you know?" I couldn't help but ask him.

He took a while to answer. Fili had gone completely silent. He probably had felt that something rather important was going on. I observed Nori while he looked at his hand and seemed to ponder for a second. Events suddenly seemed to click in place and things I hadn't really understood were now clearer. I remembered my anger when I had found how Nori had been thrown in prison on purpose.

"You were arrested in order to talk with a prisoner." It wasn't a question. Not really. I knew the answer already but still couldn't quite fathom all the consequences and facts.

Nori glanced at Fili then sighed before he relented and finally decided to talk.

"Aye. He's one of Rod's men. I had been paying Rod for information for awhile now, but each time they turned out completely useless. I started to suspect he was deceiving me years ago, but I couldn't really find any proof. This whole mess started a bit after that. I stole jewels I knew they had stolen from a merchant's in Lunetown. It helped me earn back a good part of what I had paid them." Nori rubbed one of his hands against his forehead and sighed.

Fili and I were utterly silent. We didn't even dare to move. It was rare for Nori to talk so much, let alone when it was about his deeds and in front of someone he wasn't that close to, namely Fili.

I listened attentively to his words, understanding little by little all the consequences and effects Nori's association had generated.

"I hadn't expected this son of a troll to follow me back up North. He attacked me not too far from Lunetown but I managed to escape. Soon after, he killed the merchant, who had paid me. From what the prisoner told me, he went to Gorm only because he knew the small town had troubles with dwarves and then had made a deal with us."

Nori then craned his neck and seemed to stare unseeingly at the sky. He didn't say a word more.

After a while, Fili cleared his throat and decided to ask Nori some questions.

"So he just started to attack dwarves like this? Without any reasons?"

"I'm a dwarf. That's a reason enough for him. He's been trying to …well, to catch me for some time now."

"That's madness…" I whispered before looking up at Nori. "And he has the necklace?"

"That's what he claimed yesterday." Fili was the first one to reply.

"I can't be certain. He might have said that to spite me and force me back." Nori said without looking at me.

"Nori" I called him calmly. "What did the prisoner in Lunetown tell you? I'm quite sure you didn't go in there just to ask him about Gorm. If you did, I swear to god, I'm going to hurt you…"

There was another lull in the conversation as Nori clearly hesitated to tell me the truth. I guessed he knew me as well as I knew him. He sighed once again and looked at me sadly.

"Rod has a dwarvish looking necklace. He never separates from it. That's…that's probably how he knew details about it that made me trust him and buy information."

"Oh Mahal…" I couldn't help but whisper, placing a hand over my mouth.

Fili cleared his throat and when I looked at him, I saw that his face was completely serious. All traces of grins and joy were gone.

"What necklace?"

Nori didn't answer and I wasn't sure it was my place to talk. I opened my mouth only to close it almost immediately. What could I say? It wasn't my secret to tell. But was it still a secret? As I pondered on this, Fili grew impatient.

"What necklace?" Fili repeated before looking at me. "Clearly it's something important, so again, what necklace?"

I glanced at Nori and sighed. There truly was no point in hiding anything now. Fili wasn't stupid, for all his jokes and cheeky behaviour, he was actually a rather smart and attentive to details. He would find out, connect the dots, alone if he needed to.

"Nori…" I softly murmured.

"It's a necklace that belonged to my father. It's made of our family's birth beads."

Fili swore in Khuzdul while Nori looked down once more. It seemed that right now, nothing was more fascinating than his own hands to him. The silence this time wasn't awkward, just really tense. The situation was dire. I couldn't believe that those events were all linked, though it made more sense, somehow.

Those mercenaries had been looking for Nori all along. That was why they didn't linger when the fight proved to be too complicated. That was why they had fled from Gorm so quickly. That was why they had called us thieves. All along they had been after Nori.

It seemed weird.

I could understand the will to take one's revenge. But this appeared a bit too extreme. Maybe this was yet another oddity of this world, but I couldn't really fathom how anyone would go to such length only for revenge. I frowned a bit more and looked at Nori.

"These men created so many troubles only because you stole one item from them?"

I observed him closely and I knew him well. It was maybe instinct only, but I knew Nori was hiding something. When he glanced at me and our gazes met, I just knew for certain that there was more to the story. I frowned some more and quirked an eyebrow, patiently waiting for him to speak.

At that precise moment, we both knew he would.

He sighed and looked away yet again.

"I may have taken a bit more than that…" He said vaguely.

"Nori…" I groaned while taking my head in my hands.

This was a mess. If the King found out that all those troubles had been caused by Nori's activities, I didn't think he would let it pass. What would be the thief's punishment this time? Would he be banned? At that thought fear crept up in me and I felt my heart clench painfully.

"What did you take? How much?" I asked sternly, looking up at him.

We exchanged a glance and he had the decency to look rather sheepish. Fili was so silent that I had almost forgotten his presence. Nori cleared his throat and after a rapid movement I couldn't quite follow, he held a dagger in his hand.

"Among other things, I believe this is one of the items he's quite angry to have lost."

"Mahal!" Fili exclaimed, loudly reminding me of his presence.

I looked at the dagger. It was rather pretty, I could easily admit that. But still, this was only a dagger. Just a simple weapon could have caused so many consequences?

"You're telling me that this simple dagger is the reason why that man is so hell bent on killing you?" I was rather sceptical and Nori's smirk didn't really appease my annoyance.

As I looked at him at this moment, I could see once more the smug and cheeky thief. Even if his hairdo was completely undone, even if he only was wearing a thin cotton shirt, even if he wasn't half hidden in the shadows…At this precise moment he looked more like a master thief than ever.

I shifted a bit awkwardly as something seemed to stir in me at the sight of him like this.

"It's not just any kind of dagger Amelia." He replied with a small smirk and a happy twinkle in his grey eyes.

I frowned and glimpsed at the weapon. It did look pretty and finely chiselled, but still…

"So what? It's silver and it's pretty, but really, this man would risk his men's lives just for that?"

"It's not silver Amelia." Fili breathed out.

"Definitely not silver." Nori agreed.

I looked at the younger dwarf. He seemed enthralled and amazed by the simple sight of the weapon. His eyes were wide open and seemed to follow the dagger whenever Nori would move it. It was more than a little surprising and slightly disturbing too to see Fili like this.

"What is it then? Platinum?" I asked, though I doubted it.

"Mithril." Nori answered. "This metal is the most precious one of all. Dwarves used to have access to lots of it, in Khazad-dûm. But since we lost the city, we couldn't find much of it, if any, anywhere else. Even Erebor riches were only gold and precious stones. Nowadays, a simple ring of mithril would be worth enough to buy a small town at least, if not even a city."

"You can't be serious."

"This dagger, Amelia, is worth more than you can imagine."

I realized I was gawping at him slightly and quickly shook my head.

"A dagger made of mithril. I can't believe it." Fili whispered clearly amazed, and now I understood a bit better why even though it still seemed rather preposterous. "Why didn't you tell uncle Thorin about it?"

"I don't think your uncle would have appreciated how it came to be in my possession. Besides, I fully intend to take back the rest of it before I tell Thorin about it."

"The rest of it?" I repeated, arching an eyebrow in question.

Nori's face turned suddenly very grim, almost deadly.

"Aye. It's another reason why I started to suspect Rod's treachery. It was already odd enough that all the information he gave would only lead to dead ends. But after awhile I discovered he had quite a collection of dwarvish items. Precious ones. It took me some time, but I found out most of those are family heirlooms."

There was a pause for a second and I tilted my head a bit on the side before voicing my question.

"How could he find those? I thought men were rarely accepted inside dwarves' Halls. Wouldn't such theft be reported?"

"I don't think he acquired them in any of our Halls." Nori said darkly. "He never bought any of those either, that's for sure. No, I believe all the original owners are now dead."

"He killed them." Fili spat before swearing in Khuzdul.

"Yes." Nori replied before adding. "Or found their graves."

I couldn't help but grimace in disgust. This man terrified me already, finding out that he was a murderer didn't surprise me in the least. The fact that he stole from the dead wasn't shocking either. It didn't make it less disturbing though. I could accept many things. I could understand that in this world ethics and moral were different. I understood the fact that killing someone might be perceived as a natural solution to a problem. But stealing from the dead? Robbing their graves? Nope. That I couldn't accept.

Of course those people were dead. They didn't need such items as the shiny dagger that was now in Nori's possession. And maybe, if it had been a matter of survival, I would think that stealing a weapon, food or even clothes from them could be necessary. Disgusting, but necessary. But here it wasn't a matter of surviving. It was only the greedy will of an individual that had him raid the caravans, kill the dwarves and rob their belongings.

Yes, this was properly shocking and disgusting.

"What were you planning?" I managed to ask Nori.

He seemed to ponder a bit. He was turning the dagger in his hand, observing the engraved runes. Fili was still muttering curses under his breath when Nori decided to answer.

"I didn't really have the possibility to plan anything. I found out all of this only after I talked with that prisoner in Lunetown. And after that…well I couldn't really do anything."

Thinking back on those months spent idly in Thorin's Halls, I could now understand Nori's mood much better. I was actually surprised that he hadn't left the Halls altogether. It was once more a proof of his feelings towards his family. Nori knew all along that his departure would mean that Dori, Ori and I would follow him and consequently be banished from the Halls too. He had been forced to choose. I was glad he had chosen his family, but I could now see how much it had probably hurt him to know his goal had been within his reach yet impossible to achieve.

"I don't get it. Why didn't you tell all of that to uncle?" Fili asked again.

"Because I honestly doubt that Thorin would believe any word I say, especially if my only proof is a stolen mithril dagger that happens to be in my possession." Nori snapped angrily.

We all kept silent after that.

Honestly I believed Nori didn't have much choice in the matter. From where I stood I could easily picture the King doubting his every word. It would be easier to think that Nori was just trying to find a way to go out after being grounded. Every dwarf would think that Nori was lying. I could guess that even Dori wouldn't have trusted his brother's words. Not after Nori had spent decades as a thief. No one trusted him anymore. The King would have thought that the dagger was stolen by Nori for his own profit.

Once again…what a mess.

Now, there was only one way to clear everything out. I could only see this one solution. It wasn't ideal, far from it. But at least the dwarves would have no reason not to trust Nori's words after that. It would clear it all.

Yes. There was only one way to clear this whole mess. There was only one thing we could do right now.

I slowly stood up and took the time to stretch before I placed my hands on my hips and looked at Nori. I smiled softly at him.

"So" I said. "How exactly are we going to get these beads back?"

* * *

><p><strong>AN: <strong>

**First of all, I know it has been a while since I last updated. I apologize for the wait. As you know, I have spent the last month traveling and trying to settle in a new country where I don't know anyone. Everything is fine, but I'll be honest and bluntly admit that this fic wasn't my priority during that time.**

**That said, do not fret :) It doesn't mean AT ALL that I plan to abandon it. Actually, today I managed to write half a chapter and I'm quite happy with the results. I'm more or less back on track :) **

**I have to warn you though, Please, do not expect me to post as frequently as I did for the first 20 or so chapters. First of all, the chapters are almost twice longer now. Second, I don't have as much time now as I had back then to write. I will however try my best not to let you wait too long. If I manage one chapter a week, I'll be personally happy though.**

**Secondly, I really, really want to thank the reviewers. I am not the first writer to say that, but I mean it as much as all the others, those reviews are really helpful. It's really important to me to know how you found the chapters, what you thought, what you expect, what you think will or won't happen. ...**

**All that said, I hope you liked this chapter, you certainly all waited quite a long time to read it.**

**To all of you who didn't give up on me and are still reading this story after more than a month... THANK YOU :)**


	39. Not Such a Gentleman's Game Anymore

**Everything belongs to JRRTolkien except for the OCs and the plot**

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><p>The two dwarves looked at me with different expressions ebbed on their faces.<p>

Fili was serious, a deep frown forced his eyebrows down as he looked at me with determination. I could see he agreed with me completely. His blue eyes were shining and it was easy to guess that his mind was set like mine. Calmly he let his arms rest on his bent knees. I could tell he was waiting, observing Nori's reaction, still I knew we both agreed. The only course of action we could take right now was to get those family beads back. For various reasons too.

First of all, those beads belonged to Dori, Nori and Ori. There was no questioning that. It would be simply stupid to be so close to them and run away, losing them once more. Then there was the fact that without those beads to support his words, Nori probably wouldn't be believed by the others. With the beads in hands he would be able to explain easily how and why he became a thief and how he came to know about Rod and his group.

These beads were important. I might not have understood why when I first arrived here. But now I did. I didn't even want to imagine running away without them.

I looked at the two silent dwarves.

Obviously Fili was all for taking action against the thieves.

Nori on the other hand seemed rather shocked by my question.

His braided eyebrows were almost disappearing in his hairline. His mouth was slightly agape and his eyes wide as he looked at me in disbelief.

"Amelia, you can't be serious." He finally managed to say.

I sighed, my hands were still on my hips and I was the only one of us standing.

Objectively looking at our state, I could tell the situation was far from perfect.

To be perfectly honest I was still rather tired after the previous night's ordeal. My muscles were stiff and sore and I was feeling exhausted. The memories of the cold river engulfing me were making me shiver from time to time too. Both my body and my mind were tired and screaming for me to let them rest. And it would be so easy. I only had to say the words aloud and even Fili would immediately agree to hide and run back to Thorin's Halls.

But there was no way I would let Nori down. I wouldn't agree with whatever plan he had, unless it involved stealing those damn beads back. They were too important. This might be the last chance he had in awhile to get them too. Who knew what the mercenaries will do? Who knew where they'd disappear?

I couldn't even fathom how he could think about something else right now.

"Nori, there's just no way we could go back to the Halls without the beads." I was calm and tried to show him I wasn't being hot-headed.

"Amelia, we won't discuss this anymore. I already told you there was no way I would lead either of you back to face this man." Nori stood up and stared at me sternly.

I crossed my arms over my chest and met his eyes without flinching. We both glared at each other as I answered just as sternly.

"First we didn't agree on anything, our last discussion was interrupted. Second this was all before we knew about the beads."

"It doesn't change anything. It's too dangerous." He stubbornly groaned.

"It changes everything!" I snapped.

"We're going to Thorin's Halls, and that's not up to discussion!" Nori snarled at me.

I was truly astonished by his behaviour. I couldn't understand him at this instant. This was his life goal. What could be more important than that? How could he for a second think about leaving the beads behind? A quick glance at Fili told me he still felt the same way. Nori's words clearly had no effect. I was about to speak my mind, and clearly tell Nori that he was being stupid, but Fili was quicker.

"Are you joking?"

Nori's eyes immediately snapped up as he stared at Fili. The blond dwarf wasn't deterred by the thief's glare and spoke some more.

"This…this son of a troll stole your ancestors' beads and you would let him go just like this?"

"I don't have much choice, now, do I?" Nori snarled.

Fili glanced at me and I nodded. Before he could say anything more though, I stopped him, placing a hand on his arm. I took a step towards Nori and bore my eyes in his. Softly I told him with all the strength and sincerity I could possibly express.

"Nori, don't even think for a second that we would let you miss such an opportunity. If you don't go back for those beads yourself, I will. I'm not putting a foot in Thorin's Halls until that monster is dead and those beads are back in your possession."

His grey eyes widened slightly. He didn't blink. He didn't say a word. It seemed for a second he didn't even breathe.

"Amelia. I…" Nori finally broke the contact between our eyes and sighed exasperatedly. "Fili, you're our Crown Prince, I can't involve you into this. It's my duty to bring the both of you back safely to the Halls."

I was about to retort something, but Fili was quicker this time. He completely ignored Nori's comment though.

"He believes we're far away, running back to Thorin's Halls. We have the advantage. We should attack now." Fili said.

"He'll be surrounded by his men…" Nori shook his head slightly. "There's no way the three of us will be able to sneak past them, let alone fight them."

My heart clenched.

"What would you do if neither of us was here?" I asked while gesturing at Fili and me.

Nori frowned and seemed to answer without really thinking.

"I'd find a way to sneak in their hideout and I'd steal back what's mine." He groaned between clenched teeth. "I'd pay…no. Amelia, just no. We aren't doing this."

He shook his head and started to pace in front of me. It was actually painful to witness this. I could tell right at this instant that he wanted nothing more than go after the mercenaries and kill them all. It was written all over his face. But each time he would glance at me or Fili his features changed and it was then obvious he knew no more where his duty lay. He was torn between his duty towards his King and the one towards his family.

The dwarves' loyalty clearly caused them a lot of pain.

Several minutes passed, Fili was about to say something but Nori didn't let him. He stopped pacing and faced me, his eyes shining brightly with emotions as he locked his gaze with mine.

"You almost died in my arms. I won't let that happen again." His voice was a bit strangled at the end and he glared at me.

How stubborn could this dwarf be? Though, I had to admit his last comment did make my heart speed up. Thinking about how he actually held me made me shiver, though this time, the tingling feeling that went up my spine wasn't due to the cold, at all. I swallowed thickly and averted my gaze.

Fili's voice brought me out of my thoughts.

"Nori, if we leave right now, you're going to lose what might be your only chance to get those beads back."

I nodded without realizing it, approving each words pronounced by the blond dwarf.

"Don't you think I know that?" Nori snapped angrily. "And what would you have me do then, lad? Throw Amelia in the middle of a battle? How could I face my brother, and let's not forget your uncle, if either of you gets hurt?"

"Nori, you said it yourself. It's possible to sneak in their hideout." I tried to calm him and forced my gaze up.

"No, I said I could. Probably. And it's not even certain. There's a lot of them, and they're not stupid guards either, they're bandits, miscreants. They have no honour, no morals. They don't even abide to the thieves' ones. You saw how they didn't even care about two of their men dying in front of their eyes." He ranted, resuming his pacing.

Nori was right of course. Putting aside this little piece of information about thieves' codes of honour, I concentrated on his words. The major problem here was the fact that there were three of us against a much bigger group of trained warriors. We couldn't fight them in an honourable way.

There had to be a way to reduce their number quickly.

If only we could incapacitate those stupid men.

I frowned and avoided Nori's intense gaze. He was so angry, so bitter that it physically pained me. I wanted to help him. Fili too. Couldn't he see that? He should be working with us on finding a plan, not fighting us. The way I saw it, once we had the beads Nori would be relieved and happy, Dori and Ori would too, and we would be finally able to explain to those people who mattered why Nori was a thief.

I was racking my brain hard to try and find a way to reduce the thieves' numbers.

My first idea had been to use poison. And it surprised me more than I actually thought about it, than the fact that I wasn't feeling any guilt about it. If I were entirely honest, I would admit that it was shocking that my first reflex seemed to poison people I wanted out of my way. The fact that I wasn't feeling remorse about such a plan was just an after effect of living in this world. I did what I had to for my kin.

But there were several flaws to this idea. First of all I would have to find the appropriate plants. And even if I knew about some of them, it didn't mean I was an expert in the preparation of poisons. Then there was the fact that we would have to find a way to sneak in their hideout to feed them the substance. The problem would be the same; how to get in? And lastly there was the fact that such a plan might take some time to prepare and work out. Time I wasn't convinced we had. So I kept my mouth shut. Poisoning my enemies wouldn't be part of my tactics this time.

"Nori, I'm sure that with you and the two of us," I started motioning at Fili and me. "we'll find a way to get back what's rightfully yours."

"Amelia, listen…" He started, taking a step towards me.

I took a step too and we were suddenly facing each other. We were so close that I would barely have to move to touch him. I ignored the fact that Fili was close by. Actually, he was probably observing the both of us. I didn't care at the moment. I stared right into Nori's grey eyes and tried to convey all my emotions to him.

"You listen." I said softly. "I'm not going to leave this place without this necklace. So your only choice is to either leave me alone here, or stay and help me get it back."

I saw the pain and the torment I was causing him and it hurt. It physically hurt me to see the effects my words had on him. Slowly I placed one hand on his chest, above his heart, and whispered as lowly as I could, my eyes still locked with his.

"Let me help you."

I saw him glance above my head, presumably at Fili, and only after that did he raise a hand. When I felt his large calloused hand against my cheek I couldn't help but slightly lean against him. Quickly though I managed to stop my move and I looked back in Nori's eyes. As his thumb lightly grazed my cheek I saw something shift in his gaze. He was still worried and angry. But now he seemed rather determined too.

"You'll have to listen exactly to what I say." He murmured.

I nodded, silently praying for my heart to calm down a bit. I seemed to believe Nori would hear the sound of it beating against my ribs.

"Mizimul, I'm serious. I want you to do only what I ask you to. No improvisation, no last second action. You will only do what I tell you to."

"I will." I breathed out.

We were so close that if I had leant a bit I probably could have kissed him in a heartbeat. My gaze flitted from his mouth to his eyes and I saw yet another emotion there. I couldn't name it though. It wasn't the first time I had seen it in Nori's eyes, but he was the only person I had ever seen looking at me that way.

This only served to highlight the fact that I might need to talk to him. I needed to get my feelings known. I would have to. My chest was about to explode, or at least it was how I felt. I was suffocating. Each time Nori looked at me or touched me, it would become a torture. It had been pleasant once. Now it only seemed to remind me that I couldn't be with him. That my love for him probably wasn't a good thing.

I still needed to tell him. Maybe it would help me move on to something else.

And maybe…

Just maybe…

He would feel the same way towards me too.

I dared not hope too much though. It might be cowardly, but I would rather think that Nori couldn't love me in the same way. It would help me if in truth he didn't. And if he did…

But then again... I wasn't even close to be a dwarf, and I was part of their family. That much was clear. Speaking my mind, letting my feelings be known...it could be a terrible mistake. It hurt me to keep them hidden, but it might hurt others if I let them out. What if Nori changed and suddenly became awkward with me? What if the situation festered and ended up involving our friends and worse, Dori and Ori?

At some point I had to get out of my thoughts. I realized Nori and I had been standing like this for quite a while. I swallowed thickly and averted my gaze before taking a step back. I didn't see Nori's eyes fill with hurt and doubt. When I looked back at him he was looking at the ground, frowning.

When I turned to see where Fili was, I found out he wasn't even here. I was about to go find him as Nori's voice stopped me.

"He'll soon be back. He went to the river to fill our water skins. I saw him leave with them."

The thief had to clear his throat several times after he spoke, and I remained silent. We waited for Fili to come back. I didn't dare look at Nori. I honestly had been very close to simply kiss him. That would have been embarrassing. I had this feeling that kissing people wasn't something you did just like that, randomly, in this world. It probably meant you were married to the person. When I thought about it, many things meant people were married or engaged here. It was all so different from where I had come from. If one kiss or sharing food was enough to get married, I guess the whole world would be one big happy family…or something like that.

Having such silly thoughts was a proof that I was both very tired, and mostly, really anxious about my relationship with Nori. I tended to do stupid things when I was nervous. Thankfully Fili came back at that moment. He didn't really look at any of us as he placed the water skins on the floor.

"So, what did you decide?" The blond dwarf asked finally looking up.

Nori sighed and rubbed his forehead with his right hand. It clearly pained him to pronounce the next words that came out of his mouth.

"We stay, kill Rod and get the necklace back."

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><p>I was motionless, crouching in the dark nook between two wooden barrels. My hand was clamped on my mouth as I tried to stop any noise to come out of it. My heart was beating fast from the exertion and fear, and my lungs were burning, screaming for air. I couldn't gasp, it would be too loud and would give my position. I forced myself to open my lips only a little and took a slow intake of air. Slowly I exhaled. I wanted more. Needed more. But my life could very well depend on whether or not I managed to remain quiet.<p>

My eyes were wide open as I saw the three dark shadows quickly pass and turn around a corner as they ran further away from me. For now I was safe.

I could only hope that Nori and Fili were safe and unharmed too.

I really didn't like being separated from them.

Thinking back on our plan I tried to remember how exactly I had come to this place and how I could run back to where I was supposed to be. All of this, of course, without being seen or heard. Nori had been hard enough to convince, I didn't want him to be angry at me because I hadn't been able to follow his rather simple instructions.

These past few days had truly been exhausting. I really couldn't wait to be back in Thorin's Halls. After all those events, I just wanted some peace and quiet. Maybe I would go back to work in the healing wards too.

As I was waiting for my heart to calm down to a regular beat, I thought back on the previous days' events. Yes, they had been quite tiring.

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><p>After Nori had finally agreed to stay and steal the necklace back, we started to discuss strategies. Obviously, I was mostly listening while Nori talked. Fili would ask question from time to time, but we were both trusting Nori completely. He was the thief here, he had more experience than us in such matters.<p>

It was a bit odd at first to hear him talk so much and be so serious. I had rarely seen this side of him. I was used to seeing him being sneaky, cheeky and calm. I had seen a more serious part of him when he trained me. I had caught glimpses of him when he was furious and fierce too. But this was still another part of him. He was talking strategies, battle plan and tactics as I imagined an old general would. He was the thief right now, not my close friend.

"Our main problem remains." He said with a frown, while I tried to focus. "There are too many of them and too few of us. We need to diminish their number."

"How do you want to do that?" Fili asked.

"I don't see too many ways. Either we kill them one by one," I pulled a face at hearing that, "or we manage to distract them and lure them out."

"You really think we could kill so many of them?" My voice was shaking a bit as I voiced my doubts.

Nori's eyes observed me for a second. His stern gaze turned softer and I saw one corner of his lips tug upward slightly before his mouth was once more set on a straight line.

"No. It won't be useful. It'll take too much time. We have to use some kind of diversion, something that would catch their attention and force Rod to send some of his men away from him."

"Alright, do you have any idea?"

"Maybe…"

Nori's smirk was more mischievous than ever. His eyes were bright and he had this roguish look I hadn't seen on him in awhile. It was refreshing and heartening to see it. I couldn't help but smile. Despite the situation we were in, seeing Nori like this was making me feel confident and happy.

Fili was listening intently. It was quite obvious that this was quite new for him too. For all intent and purpose, we were all going to be thieves for the time it would take us to retrieve the necklace. Still, it didn't seem to bother the blond dwarf all that much. If anything I would say he looked rather excited by it all.

"So, what's your plan?" Fili asked with a smile.

Nori's smirk grew larger as he explained it all.

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><p>We spent that first day rather leisurely. As Nori had pointed out, I was still quite weak after the previous night's events. The three of us slept some more, one of us was awake at all time, to keep watch. Fili went to hunt again, and I gathered some fruits we could eat. That evening we feasted on all that food. Nori had even managed to catch two fishes in the river. It didn't look like we were preparing a robbery. If anything it felt as if we were on holiday.<p>

As the sun slowly lowered in the sky we gathered our belongings. Thank Mahal, everything was dry after a whole day in the sun. I was back to wearing my own clothes and carrying my small bag.

As the night fell, we made our way toward town.

One of our main problems was that we didn't know for sure where the men's hideout was. Obviously they had connection with the innkeeper. After Fili retold me the events of the previous night, some of it came back to me too. Clearly we had been sold to the men. Nori hadn't been surprised. He said he knew this man wasn't to be trusted.

As we walked silently, I couldn't help but wonder who Nori's informant would be. He had told us that he knew someone he could, more or less, trust in town. He wouldn't let us go in this person's house, but he would ask him details about Rod's group.

It was to be expected that Nori 'knew people'. It was why he had become a thief to begin with. It was rather odd though that none of those people ever informed him that Rod was a backstabbing son of a troll, according to Fili. I did agree with the young dwarf but Nori had simply shrugged when we highlighted this.

"I wouldn't spend money to know something like this."

Fair enough. His informants were actually to be trusted, as long as he paid. This world's never ceased to amaze me, though I guessed it was the same in mine. I was just unused to be around such crowds.

We arrived in sight of the town rather early in the night.

Nori obviously didn't want to cross the main gate, so we were back to the site of the previous night's fight. I crouched next to Fili, we were still hidden by some bushes and under the trees' protection.

"You both stay here." Nori whispered.

I wanted to protest, but the thief had already disappeared, melting away in the night's shadow.

I was stunned to see Nori so at ease in the night.

Clearly, Fili was a bit surprised too. Knowing he was a thief was one thing, seeing him in action was another matter completely.

In all but a second Nori had disappeared. Fili and I were not moving and there was absolutely no noise around us. Nori was too quiet. We had no idea where he was or in which direction he went. It was surreal in a way. I had always known dwarves to be noisy. It was in their nature to be like that. The Halls were rarely if ever calm and silent. Actually, whenever the Halls would become silent, it usually meant that something terrible had just happened or was about to occur. Yes, dwarves were meant to be noisy. Nori was different. I knew that already. It had been rather obvious that he wasn't entirely like the others. Even if he laughed, even if he smoked, even if he drank, even if he did exactly the same things as the others...he just did them differently. I wouldn't be able to explain how or why, it was just a feeling, something I knew to be true.

Nori was different. I had just never realized how much.

We waited for a while as minutes ticked by. At some point I was starting to get nervous when Fili kindly patted my shoulder. We weren't crouching anymore. My legs couldn't bare it a minute longer. Instead we sat under a tree, behind the bushes. We were well hidden and there was simply no way we would miss anyone coming our way.

Around us there were only bushes with thorns and the forest, if we didn't see someone arriving, we would hear him for sure. For that reason we had apparently silently agreed not to talk. Fili's hand on my shoulder was all the support I would get. I had no idea how long we waited, a few hours at least. It was really a difficult exercise in patience.

My mind was actually starting to doze when I once again felt a hand on my shoulder. I glanced toward Fili to see he was looking at both his hands intently.

It actually took me another good second to realize that the hand on my shoulder didn't belong to the blond dwarf.

"What the …" I started to yelp, jerking away, before a large hand covered my mouth.

Fili startled too and was quickly on his feet. In one swift move the blond dwarf had unsheathed both his swords and was looking bewildered in my direction.

My eyes widened as my heart rate skyrocketed from the fright. Both Fili and I froze though before I realized what had just happened. As soon as I did, I felt anger rise in me. The kind of anger I rarely felt.

Nori was smirking smugly next to me.

We hadn't seen him, hadn't heard him, and that idiot apparently thought it'd be fun to scare us to death.

I forcefully removed his hand from my mouth and glared at him.

"Are you out of your mind?" I hissed lowly.

Fili, to my surprise, was barely containing his chuckles.

"It's not funny." I glared at the blond. "You scared me! I can't believe it! You…" I wanted to rant some more but Nori placed his hand on my mouth once more.

"Sorry Mizimul. I didn't mean to scare you."

All my anger disappeared when I looked in his eyes. He seemed genuinely concerned. I sighed, it was rather odd, but apparently I couldn't stay angry for long. I frowned. Was this only because there truly wasn't much to be angry about, or was it because it was Nori?

That was a true question and I wasn't sure I was actually able to answer it.

I didn't even have the time to think about it, because Nori took my arm and lead me toward the depth of the forest. Meanwhile he whispered to us.

"I found out where their hideout is. We should wait for tomorrow though. Tonight, everyone is here. If we're lucky, some will leave in the morning. Apparently, they have been seen packing stuff all day."

"So they're truly running away from us." Fili breathed out.

"Aye" Nori helped me step over a fallen log before he turned his head toward Fili. "Well, they're clearly thinking we're on our way to Thorin's Halls. I guess they don't want to stay if an army of dwarves is to arrive."

"So, we wait for tomorrow evening?" I asked, trying not to pay attention to the fact that Nori was still kindly guiding me in the dark.

"Aye. We have one more day to think over our plan and rest." Nori looked at me. "Are you alright?"

"I'm fine. Stop worrying." Despite my words, I smiled at him.

Oh Mahal, I really couldn't get angry at this dwarf. I couldn't even feel annoyed about his protectiveness. What was going on inside my head? I inhaled deeply. I really wanted to talk with Nori. I wanted to get it all off my chest. I couldn't though. Now wasn't the right time. I pushed my feelings, doubts and thoughts of him further back in my mind and tried to concentrate on the path we were walking on.

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><p>For the rest of that night and the whole following day, I listened to Fili and Nori going through our plan endlessly. We rested as well and I took the time to properly clean my wounds. They weren't hurting me that much, but the one on my cheek was honestly annoying. I didn't complain though. I had caught Nori's gaze as I was cleaning the cut on my face. He had seemed genuinely upset and I couldn't add to his concern by voicing my annoyance at the wound.<p>

The whole day passed rather slowly and by the end of it, I was starting to become really bored.

It was once more only when the sun started to set that we decided to leave.

Nori was obviously leading us. He gestured for us to stay hidden more than once while he went ahead and scouted. Each time, my heart would beat faster as anxiety and worry made my hands tremble slightly.

It took us some time, or at least it felt that way, to arrive to the high wooden fence that surrounded Archet.

Nori quickly found back the wooden panels that allowed all the thieves and bandits around to go in and out unnoticed. I had questioned him earlier. I was certain that the men would have closed the path. He assured me they wouldn't.

"They're the ones who use them the most Amelia." He said kindly.

Now I had to admit he had been right all along. I looked up at him, wondering whether he remembered my doubts. Even though it was dark, the moon provided just enough light for me to see. Nori's playful wink when he met my gaze was a dead giveaway that he remembered our discussion perfectly. I wanted to glare at him, playfully of course. Instead I found myself smiling slightly.

I didn't have the time to be surprised by my own reaction though, I was already walking through the small hole, meeting with Fili on the other side.

This time we didn't stay out in the open. Nori quickly led us to a shadowy corner. There he proceeded to look around us, searching the darkness for enemies who would have seen us. Once more I was stunned to see him in action. His face was blank, his eyes focused and his mouth set in a straight and thin line. I could see his eyes dart from one spot to the other, while he stood with his knees slightly bent, as if he was ready to jump in any direction.

He fastened his hood around his neck before turning towards Fili.

"You remember how to go to the barn?" He whispered so low that I could barely hear him.

Fili simply answered with a sharp nod. The blond dwarf was surprising me too. Gone was the cheeky and joyous young dwarf. In front of me was a warrior ready to go to battle. Nori placed one of his hand against Fili's shoulder and whispered some more.

"We don't have to do this Fili. We can still go back. I'll find other ways to get back that necklace. I don't want to endanger you."

I knew it was pointless for Nori to try and convince any of us now. But I knew already that he would try at least. He might be a thief, but Nori wasn't a criminal. He was a good person, a good dwarf. He took care of his kin. He clearly didn't feel alright with having me and Fili around right now. I knew he would rather be alone to deal with all this, not because he didn't trust us, but because he didn't want to see us hurt. Fili though, just like me, thought that it was only natural to help.

"I'm not going to change my mind Nori." He breathed out before smirking smugly. "Durin's heir never back out from a fight."

Nori smirked and nodded at that.

In an instant, Fili left us. My eyes were riveted on his back as I observed him walk along the walls. He was bent and obviously trying to be quiet. I kept my gaze on him until he turned the corner of a house and I simply couldn't see him anymore.

I took a quick breath as his shadows disappeared from our view. Now, I could only hope everything would go according to plan. My grip on my long staff tightened a bit. I couldn't help but think that such a weapon really wasn't adapted to fighting in such an environment, but well, I wasn't supposed to fight anyway.

Nori's voice brought me out of my thoughts at that moment.

"Are you sure you…"

"Nori," I said while turning to face him. "I'm fine, I won't have any problem finding my way."

His frown told me he would still worry. Gently he brought his hand to my cheek and grazed the skin under the cut. His eyes were sad as he looked at it. My heart clenched painfully in my chest as thoughts I never thought I would ever have, crossed my mind. What did Nori think of that cut? Did he find it ugly? As soon as I thought that I mentally chastised myself. How vain could I be? It was a battle wound, if anything I should be glad to be alive. And right now I should be concentrating on my task, not on what Nori could possibly be thinking about me.

Apparently the dwarf hadn't followed my trail of thought. Next thing I knew, I was blinking while Nori's lips were gently pressed on my forehead. I held my breath as my whole body started to heat a bit.

"Be careful Mizimul. If anything happen, don't hesitate to run."

"Nori, I would…"

"Amelia." He interrupted me. "I'm serious. Run. I don't want you to be endangered. Remember your promise."

I wanted to discuss this and argue with him. There was no way I would run away without him, or Fili for that mattered. I couldn't run and leave him, well, them, behind. The promise I had made seemed suddenly impossible to keep. As I was about to protest and complain, his tight voice changed into a broken whisper.

"Please, Mizimul. For me."

My heart painfully clenched. How could I refuse him this little thing? I wanted to tell him no so badly. I didn't want to abandon him, or Fili, and run away by myself. It was a bad idea through and through. But when I looked in his eyes, I just couldn't bring myself to refuse. I couldn't fight him, not on this, not when it clearly meant so much.

"I hate it." I whispered. "But alright, I will. If anything happen, I will run."

The words were hard to pronounce, they burnt my throat and my mouth. They left an awful aftertaste. I pulled a face and glanced back at Nori.

It was worth it. If only to see the relief in his eyes, it was worth this horrible feeling in my chest. When Nori embraced me, right then, I brought my arms around his waist and let my head fall on his shoulder. We held each other tightly until I leant back a bit and told him seriously.

"Be careful Nori. I don't want to run back by myself."

I couldn't look in his eyes right then. I knew I couldn't deny it anymore. My feelings for Nori were strong, too strong. This damn crush was really not what I should be focusing on right now, but I couldn't help but feel hopeful when Nori was being so kind to me. I tried to calm myself. I was trying to be rational about it. Nori was probably being gentle and protective because I was his kin, his adoptive sister. It was nothing more. He couldn't possibly be feeling anything else. I couldn't be so lucky. I shouldn't hope. It would hurt too much otherwise.

Without looking at the dwarf I took a deep breath and shook my head slightly.

I needed to focus on my task, and on my task only. There would be a time to think about my feelings for Nori, but now really wasn't it.

"Do you remember where to go?" Nori asked in a strangely gruff voice.

"Yes. Don't worry." I nodded calmly, I was trying my best to be calm. I knew that if I worried, he wouldn't be able to let me go.

"As soon as you arrive there, start, and then run back here." He repeated for the umpteenth time in two days.

"I know." I patiently answered.

"Be safe."

His hoarse whisper made my heart beat falter slightly and I took a shaky breath.

"You too." I breathed out softly.

Without even glancing behind my shoulder I gripped my staff a bit more tightly and took the first step out of the shadows towards the street. As soon as I took that first step, I put all thoughts of Nori in the back of my mind. I couldn't afford to make any mistake. I had to pay attention and concentrate on my mission.

I tried my best to be quiet. I ran to the first house and crouched in the shadows. Not looking back to see if Nori was still there, I started to walk along the wall until I arrived at the corner. Once there I glanced in the next street. It seemed empty, but I knew I had to be cautious. I let my eyes wander on the different façades, making sure that there was no shadow observing the streets from behind the windows. I couldn't hear any noise, couldn't see anyone, so I decided it was safe to go.

I didn't have to go that far. After longing that street, I would have to cross another one to then walk in a smaller one that would lead me to the only water tank from that town. They didn't have wells, simply because there was no need for it. There was a river just on the other side of the town's fence if they needed; the basins were here just to save some time and efforts. If I were to believe Nori's words, it was separated between two basins; one was smaller and was used to retrieve water for cooking and drinking, the second larger one was used by the women as a washing place.

For now though, I had to arrive there. I tried to stay in the shadows as much as possible. I wore my hood and had my staff in hand. Our bags though, we had left them hidden in the forest. Obviously, Nori had been the one to hide them.

I took a small break as I arrived at the main street, the one I had to cross. This time I really had to be cautious. Nori would not forgive me if I were to be captured. I was fairly certain he would help me escape, but he would be quite angry afterwards.

After a few minutes spent observing the street and houses, I rushed to the other side and didn't wait to see whether someone had seen me. Quickly I made my way to the smaller street indicated by Nori. It was as dark as he said it would be and I pulled a face. I wasn't afraid of darkness, but it had long been ingrained in me never to walk by myself into small, dark and creepy alleys. Especially not at night.

In my world, I would have easily imagined several junkies being hidden there. Or maybe a serial killer...

Swallowing thickly, I tried to remind myself that there probably weren't any junkies in this world. I wasn't even certain they had any drugs, except for this weird tobacco that the dwarves insisted to smoke. I had to be brave, it was silly to be afraid of an alley. And, well...I could only hope there wasn't any serial killer in that specific alley right now.

After taking a deep inhale, that I immediately regretted I had taken because of the pungent smell in this town, I quickly walked in the small passage.

As soon as I stepped in though, I had to reduce my pace. I simply couldn't see where I was putting my feet, and I really wasn't certain I wanted to know. Even though I tried to be quiet, I could hear each of my steps. It felt and sounded as if the ground was spongy and humid. At some point I heard something snap under my boot. It couldn't be a twig; there were no twigs in there. I closed my eyes and tried to ignore it as I became certain I was actually making my way through various wastes and garbage.

I was glad to see the end of it.

I stood in the darkness as I observed the place I had arrived in. Apparently I was standing at the other side of that town. I could see the high wooden fence, and, just next to it, there seemed to be a small construction. It was nothing much, just a low wooden roof. There was no building under it, just the large beams that supported the whole structure. From where I was, I had to squint my eyes to see what looked like a bench under the roof. I could hear the soft sound of running water, so at least I knew I was at the right place.

It was surprising that their only water spot wasn't guarded at all.

I would have thought that people would be careful with their main water source. I guessed people around here weren't that concerned with security anyway. I looked around and dimmed it safe to cross the uncovered space between the spot I was in and the washing place. I ran until I was under the wooden roof, there I walked to the back, near the fence where I observed the whole place.

It was disturbingly dirty.

One would think that they would at least place some wooden panels on the floor to keep it relatively clean. But instead there was a thick layer of mud. I pulled a face, reminding myself that it wasn't important right now and that I didn't drink any water coming from here anyway.

The important thing was that it was the only water recipient for this whole town. Nori had told me it was supplied in water by a small stream that sprung from there and then joined the larger river a few miles out of town. The people here had built two basins around the stream, blocking the water with a system of small wooden panels. I could see one of those small panels separating the two basins. The excess of water was leaking from one lower spot in the wood. Both recipients were full and I observed the panel that was built in the continuity of the town's fence. It looked like there was a small door with a hole on top of it from where the water was falling back into a stream that then ran toward the river. If someone were to open those two panels, all the water will evacuate and the basins would take quite some time to replenish.

That was exactly what I was planning to do.

I didn't ponder on the fact that, even though I wasn't poisoning them this time, I was still targeting the town's water source. Well, it wasn't my idea any way...and besides it wasn't as if they would have to wait for rain to fall this time. Shrugging away any guilt I might have felt, I concentrated once more on my task. I took less than a minute to assess the situation.

I couldn't access the panel from where I was. There was no dwelling on it. I had to find another way to open the panels.

Gingerly I approached the slippery edge and took my staff firmly. I tried to use it to first, push against the wood. I wasn't having much success. The thing didn't budge. From where I was I couldn't see any lever or mechanism that would allow me to open it. There had to be a way though. I had to find it quickly too. I didn't know how much time had passed, but Fili would probably soon take action too. Everything would fail if I couldn't open that stupid panel.

After a few minutes, I found a weaker spot. Each time I would press against it with my staff, the panel would waver a bit. I was certain that with a bit more pressure, it would open completely. I tried to step closer. My feet were already on the edge. Taking some leverage on the fence, I leant and pushed as strongly as I could with my staff.

And what had to happen, indeed happened.

I slipped.

"Dam…" I couldn't help but yelp as I felt my right foot slip before being followed in the water by my whole body.

I heard a loud splash before my head was underwater. My feet hit the ground bellow and I tried to push myself back up. But I slipped on the ground there too. Finally I managed to kick myself upwards. I coughed and spluttered, trying to breathe some air in.

How stupid and unlucky could I be?

That water was freezing cold too. At least this time my body temperature wasn't too high and I wouldn't risk drowning.

I still had my staff in one hand as I swam toward the wooden panel. Now that I was in the water anyway, I could at least take care of this.

I was afraid I had made too much noise and that people would come to see what had happened. I couldn't lose any time. I had to open that stupid panel now. I discarded my staff and coat, throwing them on the edge of the basin and used my hands and shoulders to push on the panel. At first there truly weren't many effects, until the moment I heard a loud crack.

Suddenly, there was nothing to stop the water from rushing out anymore.

The strength of the current, coupled with the sudden fall of the panel, almost had me fell on the other side too. I barely managed to grip the fence as water rushed all around me, pushing me closer to the hole now gaping under the fence. I was dangerously close to fall over as my feet slipped again on the muddy ground.

Thankfully it only lasted for several long seconds, probably a minute but not much more.

I was now standing under the fence, in the slippery sludge that covered the ground. As I gingerly made my way toward the second basin, I fell twice. I had to swallow back the curses I wanted to use. I was already making too much noise. The feeling of the cold sludge seeping through my fingers made me inwardly cringe. I tried not to think about how this could infect the small wound on my left hand. Each time though, I went back on my feet and finally arrived where I wanted to go.

The smaller basin was still closed and full, but from where I stood, I could now easily see the small piece of wood that was used as a bar to block the entire panel. I only had to remove it and step aside and all the water would naturally flow away.

I tried not to use my left hand too much, as the small wound on it was still fresh and would bleed if I tugged on it too much. It hurt me already after I used it to grip my staff tightly.

I made quick work of opening the second panel and I let the water flow while I put my hands in its way, cleaning them at least a bit. Then I unstably made my way to the edge. I struggled to get out of the basin. I was too small and I ended up more or less crawling my way out. My hands, arms, torso and legs were covered in mud when I finally managed to get out. My face was probably as dirty.

I grimaced and tried my best to at least wipe my hands on the back of my breeches before I took my coat and staff back. I quickly left the place to go back in the small, dark and creepy alley. I was leaving a trail of water behind me. Hopefully the men wouldn't see it in the night. Once in the dark alley, I tried to wring my long coat that dripped water everywhere.

As I was concentrating on that, I suddenly saw a small shimmering light coming from another part of town.

Fili had started.

I had to quickly go back to the hiding place where Nori would find me. Fili was probably back in the forest already, or at least I hoped that he was out of town.

The plan was to meet back with him in the place where we had hidden our bags.

I would have to wait for Nori though.

Without wasting any time, I ran back along the alley, and crossed the street after a quick glance. In the silence of the night I could already hear some noise coming from further away. Dogs were barking loudly and I even heard a few men shout as well. I wasn't feeling bad about this. I didn't like this town. They apparently didn't mind having men like Rod there and from what Nori had said, this place had been built by bandits mostly. That was the reason why we traded so many weapons here.

No, I didn't feel any guilt. Besides, the building that Fili had targeted was far from the others. Risk was minimal.

Nori's plan consisted in drawing people out of their houses, drawing the thieves out of their hideout. A huge, inextinguishable fire in town would provide the perfect distraction.

I had asked whether or not Rod was likely to watch the fire, or try to help, but Nori had been certain he would send his men, but stay behind. To me, that spoke volume about the kind of person he was.

My only job had been to make sure the men wouldn't have access to water to extinguish the fire. We needed it to burn high and long. Fili had been the one to put the barn on fire, and he had supposedly run away immediately, using another passage in the fence, one that was hidden by a bush, near the barn. I could only hope that Nori's information had been enough for the blond dwarf to find his way.

Now I was almost back to my meeting point with Nori when three men barrelled out of the house I was running by. Immediately they spotted me and pointed towards me.

"Oy, you! What's going on?" One asked with a gruff voice.

For a second I had no idea what to do as I was forced to stop.

My heart missed a beat as I squeaked. I couldn't let them take me. Thankfully the darkness might help me, as well as my size.

Trying to speak in a tiny, squeaky and girly voice I pointed toward the town.

"Quick. There's a fire. A huge fire. Da asked me to get people to help." I managed to say between gasps for air.

"What?!" The three men bellowed before taking off in the direction I had indicated.

Immediately I started to run in the other direction. My heart was beating fast because of my sprint and the shock from seeing those three men pop out of that house. My anxiety level skyrocketed as I heard one of them yell after me.

"Oy! Where're you going?"

I didn't even try to glimpse above my shoulder as I turned around a corner and sprinted through that street. I turned several more times until I spotted a group of large barrels that were placed in the shadow near a house. Without hesitating I hid between two of those.

My heart rate was high and I had trouble breathing. I tried to be as quiet as possible in order to ascertain whether those three men had followed me or not. As I was about to lean and glimpse out of my hiding place, I heard voices and the distinctive noise of people running in my direction.

I closed my eyes for a second.

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><p>Now my heart had slowed down. The men had taken a wrong direction several minutes ago and everything seemed calm in this area of town. I could hear shouts coming from where I supposed the fire was. I wondered whether Nori was safe, whether he already had stolen the necklace and killed Rod.<p>

It oddly didn't disturb me to think that Nori was about to kill that man. I knew that the leader of the bandits was a terrifying person. He had seemed cruel, and slightly insane in a way. Even though I didn't objectively know that much about him, I couldn't help but think he was more a monster than a man. Who would order his subordinates to jump in a cold torrent at night? Thankfully I couldn't remember the cries of his men who had drowned in the river. Fili had told me about them though and it had greatly disturbed me to find out that someone could be so cruel, so mad, that he would go to such length to catch someone.

No. I didn't mind that Nori was planning to kill him. It somehow reassured me. It meant I would never have to face that Rod's ugly face anymore. I shivered at the memories of him in that small kitchen in Gorm. I wished I would never have to see him ever again.

I waited for a few more minutes before I stood up. I had to find my way back to the meeting point. Nori would go mad if I wasn't there when he would come back.

Trying to be silent with my dripping wet clothes was difficult though. And it was extremely uncomfortable too. I shivered from the cold as I slowly made my way through several streets.

Thankfully I wasn't lost. I just had to turn and cross two more streets. I had run quite far because of these three men.

I was slowly coming closer to my goal when I heard some creaking noise behind me. I startled violently and was about to turn to see what was coming my way when a large hand grabbed my shoulder and pulled me deeper in the shadows.

I couldn't even yelp as another calloused hand was pressed tightly against my mouth.

My eyes widened in the dark as the first thought that crossed my mind was Nori's name…

What was going on?

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><p><strong>AN Alright, like usual I want to sincerely thank the reviewers, as well as those of you who favourited or followed this story :) It's always nice to know people out there are interested!**

**I wanted to thank cookiezncream and Noriah too for their reviews :) **

**I hope you liked this chapter. It's not my favourite, far from it, but well... It is a necessary one. Still, I hope you enjoyed it.**

**I have two news; The first, completely useless, is that I already wrote more than a thousand pages! I must say I never thought, when I started this story, that it would be THAT long. And to think I'm just at the start of the quest -_- ... well, that means a lot more of Amelia and Nori for everyone :)**

**The second is, that I am moving slowly along the story and I just wanted to let you know I have indeed started the second part, the one with the quest :) So you just have to be a little bit more patient and we'll move onto that part soon.**

**I'll try and update next weekend :) Thanks a lot for being patient and for being so supportive and kind!**


	40. To Belong

**Everything belongs to JRRTolkien, except for the OCs and the plot.**

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><p>I struggled against the hold this unknown person had on me. I was clearly shorter and weaker than him though, which didn't help at all. The hand on my shoulder was now holding me tightly around the waist, blocking my left arm against my side. I didn't even try to analyze what was happening. I had to react, and I had to do it quickly. Adrenalin pulsed through my veins, and for a second I had the strange feeling that I could actually get rid of this person.<p>

With my right hand I tried to pry away from my mouth the dirty hand that prevented me from breathing correctly. At the same time I started to struggle, hoping to dislodge the arm that was locking me against this man's chest. I stepped on his feet and tried to kick him. I did everything I could to try and get away from his hold.

I didn't want to call for help.

I knew no one would actually help me, unless it was Nori, and yelling might give away his hiding place.

So I was left having to deal with this myself.

Besides...his hand against my mouth prevented me from yelling or even biting him. It was frustrating. Well, a bit more than just frustrating maybe.

I kept on thrashing around in his arms. I honestly did the best I could. I was trying everything I could think of. I tried to find some leverage somewhere to push him. My feet kept on slipping on the dirty ground and I quickly gave up that idea. I finally managed to kick the man's shins, after repeatedly stepping on his feet. I scratched his hand with my nails. I was certain I drew blood but it was nothing that could actually bother that man. Desperate, I hit him with my elbow, trying to find his ribs.

Except for grunts and muttered curses, that stupidly strong man didn't react to my attacks.

Little by little he was forcing me to step back. I had no idea where he was leading me, but at some point I heard the same creaking noise in my back. Suddenly, the man turned and literally threw me through a door into a dark corridor. It took me by surprise and I didn't react quickly enough. Instead of simply reeling through the door, I tumbled and crashed into one of the wooden wall before falling in a heap to the floor.

The shock had been nothing but violent.

My head was spinning.

I was completely disorientated.

I tried to stand back up, but my efforts were useless. My legs apparently couldn't keep me up and I was slipping and scrambling uselessly in the dirt. Another loud creak informed me that the door was probably closed now and the man would soon attack me again. I was dizzy and my sight was so fuzzy that I could barely distinguish my opponent. The darkness didn't help.

For a second I was truly afraid.

I had to get up.

My fingers dug in the dirt as my legs gave out under me again.

Blinking rapidly I tried to find anything on the wall that would help me stand up.

I wasn't quick enough though.

As soon as I felt two large hands grab my tunic just above my chest, I tried to send a kick in the man's legs. I gripped his wrists and didn't hesitate to dig my nails in his skin. He grunted and insulted me but at the time I really didn't care much about that. I felt him start to lift my body. Immediately I let go of his left wrist. I tried to send a pathetic punch in his face but he avoided it. Instead of trying that again, I grabbed the first thing I touched, his ear, and started to tug on it fiercely. He swore loudly. I sent another kick in the general direction of his legs while he quickly heaved me up and rammed me into the wall.

The shock forced the air out of my lungs. I heard a resounding crack when my head connected with the wooden surface. Black dots clouded my vision. My limbs lost all strength. He repeated the exact same move once more. That second time was just as violent as the first. Pain shot through my body. I could barely breathe.

I felt like a puppet in his hands, hanging lifelessly there with my head lolling on my shoulders. When he let go of me, I fell pathetically on the ground. I heard him grunt before he grabbed one of my arms and one of my legs and easily thrown me over his wide shoulders. This man was huge. It was as if he was carrying some lamb to the butcher. I was tiny compared to him and it clearly was no trouble for him to carry me around like that.

My weak attempts to fight back were barely noticeable after that. I had no idea where my staff was. I had lost it at some point but I couldn't remember when exactly it had happened. Had it been before or after I was thrown in there? Did I have other weapons? Of course I had. My whole brain seemed to have been properly shaken and I had troubles thinking clearly.

I still tried to stubbornly push him away, but I had lost all strength at the moment. He grabbed both my wrists in his right hand and used his left arm to block my legs. I was too weak to struggle.

I had this feeling we went downstairs and walked for awhile, but it didn't make any sense and I was so out of it anyway that I really couldn't rely on those feelings.

As the man walked, I slowly started to recover but I tried not to show it too much. It wasn't really a recovery per se, but my vision slowly cleared a bit. My thoughts too. I knew I couldn't fight this man. The back of my head could attest it, I wasn't strong enough. My only other solution was to wait and see where he was leading me. If he thought I was still unable to walk by myself, he wouldn't be careful. Eyes half closed I tried to look where we were.

My head was pounding but I tried my best to stay focused.

I was almost certain we were underground. This impression was strengthened when we finally arrived to a large room without any windows. I turned my head to the side, trying to find out as much as I could about the place I was in. My lessons were still fresh in my memories, I had to know and pay attention to my surroundings.

The ceiling was surprisingly high; even if I were to stand on top of this man's shoulders I wouldn't be able to reach it. There were large wooden beams supporting it and crisscrossing above our heads. Candles were lit here and there, providing some lights but leaving large spots of darkness. I could see several other doors and there was even a ladder at one end which probably led to a hatch. As I craned my neck a bit more, I managed to see where we were going. In the middle there was a long wooden table with benches on both sides and at the other side, a man was patiently drinking his mead.

My heart skipped a beat.

Rod.

I would recognize his scarred face everywhere and at any time.

At his side I could see his terrible weapon, the one that had caused so much pain to Nori. The one that could cause irreparable damages...

I clenched my fists and tried to calm my now rapidly beating heart. Swallowing thickly I closed my eyes for a second. I wasn't ashamed to admit I was afraid. This man was terrifying.

The one who was carrying me suddenly threw me above his head, on the floor, not too far from Rod's feet. I didn't even have a chance to catch anything as I hit the ground heavily. Pain erupted in my side. A yelp escaped my mouth before I could even think of stopping it. I turned as quickly as I could, so that I was on my knees and facing Rod. It was mortifying to find myself in such a position. I tried to reassure myself, after all I still had my two daggers hidden by my coat, the third one in my boot and Nori's knife hidden under my wristband.

They might find the twin daggers, but they would never find the other two. Or at least, I hoped they wouldn't, because if they did...it meant I would be entirely naked in front of them.

Pushing those frightening thoughts away I repeated in my head that there was no way they could find all those blades before I did at least injure them a bit.

Oddly enough it did reassure me a bit.

I let my eyes wander around the room. Except for Rod, there were only two other men; the one who had carried me and another one with long blond hair. My carrier truly was a sort of giant. He was the tallest man I had ever seen and he had an impressive musculature. He looked barbaric. There was simply no chance I would have done him any sort of damage. The blond one was rather tall too, but he was nothing like the one who had kidnapped me.

I was forced to look back at Rod when he cleared his throat and spoke.

"I must say, your little stunt last time was interesting. When that idiot of an innkeeper told me a young human looking girl was with the dwarves, I hoped it was you." He smirked and the sight made me shiver. "So, what is it this time? Is your dad sick and you just had to find a healer for him so you just happened to arrive in Archet escorted by two dwarves." He was clearly mocking me. "Or have you been attacked by mean bandits once again?"

I took a sharp breath and licked my lower lip. I had to think quickly. What would be the better way to approach this situation? I had truly no idea. I was tired and my head was still pounding thanks to the giant. My mind was blank.

"What is it to you?" I asked, trying to waste his time.

His eyes narrowed at me and the giant whacked my shoulder. Pain shot through my upper body, but it was short lived. Apparently this hadn't been the right answer. I could only be glad that the brute hadn't hit my head.

"What are you planning here, girl? Where are the dwarves? Why did you come? Was it for this?"

At these words, Rod rose one hand to his collar and took something that had been hidden under his tunic until that moment. Immediately my eyes were riveted to the necklace he wore. Could it be Nori's? The chain wasn't really long, and stringed on it I could distinguish five metallic beads. It could be a coincidence, but from what I could see it looked a lot like the way I had imagined Nori's necklace.

My heart was hitting my ribcage almost painfully.

My eyes shot back up to meet Rod's.

"I'm not planning anything. I came here for trades. I have no idea why you believe this…thing is of any interest to me." I tried to muster as much strength and anger as I could to convey them in my voice.

I had to sound convincing right now.

I clenched my fist, digging my own nails in the flesh of my palms, trying to hide the shaking of my hands.

I wondered where Nori was. Clearly, Rod was still alive and in possession of the beads. It meant that Nori was either hidden somewhere close by…or not here at all. I didn't want to think about other possibilities. I didn't want to believe he could have been caught. The tall blond spoke then, catching my attention.

"Why are you interested in her?" He shrugged and seemed completely bored by the events.

"Because this girl," Rod pointed a finger at me. "Has killed three of my men, back in Gorm."

"That girl?" The blond said disbelievingly while the giant behind me snorted.

Rod shrugged and made a gesture towards the giant. Fear coursed through my veins as I felt the man grab my collar and easily heaved me up again. I wavered a bit, my knees apparently too weak to hold me up at the moment. I swallowed back the lump in my throat and tried to defend myself.

"I didn't do anything! I don't know what you're talking about!" I exclaimed. "What do you want from me?"

Maybe the little lost girl act would work this time too? I could only hope it would, because I truly had no idea what I could do otherwise. The thought of me fighting those three was nothing but a joke. A sick joke.

I heard the blow before I actually felt the burn spread through my cheek. The gigantic brute had just slapped me, and of course, he had chosen to hit the cheek that had already been cut. I lost my balance for a second and I stumbled a bit. I was quite proud to realize I hadn't even yelped. It hurt a lot though. I had the odd impression that my eyeball had almost popped out of its socket. The white hot searing burn wasn't helping my headache and I really had some trouble to concentrate for a short minute.

"You'll find it easier to tell me the truth, girl. I'm sure Bert will agree to hit you all night long if that's what it takes."

The sound of his voice made me cringe. He was having fun, I realized. This bastard found it funny to look at a giant man while he hit a tiny girl. I had no idea what it would take to appease him. This man was mad. Seriously mad. No one in his right mind would act like he did. He didn't care about his men's death, of that I was certain. I could have bet that his anger about Gorm was related to the fact that two dwarves managed to escape him. He was angry his plan back there hadn't worked.

I swallowed difficultly.

I was completely lost. What could I do?

The men had apparently completely overlooked the fact that I had weapons on me. Why? Did they think I was no threat to them? Did they think I wouldn't have weapons? Or were they so crazy that they wanted me to try and use them? At that second my hands twitched. An almost unbearable need to use my daggers coursed through me. I clenched my fists once more. I had to calm myself. I had to think clearly. Using those weapons wouldn't help me in the least right now.

I could hear my heart pound loudly in my chest.

I gritted my teeth and instead of saying anything else, chose to stay silent for now. I had the hunch that whatever I would say would earn me some more bruises. It would hopefully be better for me to wait quietly.

"Alright, I don't care that much about you anyway." Rod snickered before drinking from his tankard. "Where's the little thief? Was it your plan to get me out of here to try and fight that stupid fire?"

I forced myself to breathe slowly and tried to keep my face completely blank. My eyes though, were burning with fury as I glared hatefully at Rod. I just couldn't help it. After a few minutes Rod nodded in Bert's direction. Not even a second later I felt his hand hit my other cheek in a painful slap. A few tears gathered in my eyes against my will and I glared at the giant who was looking at me blankly.

"Where's the thief?" Rod repeated.

This time I chose to look down at my feet. Maybe it wasn't my silence but my glare that had caused the painful retribution. Not even a minute later I knew my assumption was wrong as yet another slap connected with my face. At least Bert was kind enough to alternate between the two cheeks…I felt my jaw clench and tried my best to keep the tears at bay. It was humiliating.

I wasn't a small child anymore.

Nori had trained me to fight.

I should be able to take them…

As soon as that thought crossed my mind, I realized how stupid I was being. Even with training, I wasn't experienced or strong enough to fight them. I knew it. It wasn't a surprise. But the problem was that each blow I received was apparently pushing logic and caution out of my mind. It was the second time already that I barely stopped my hands from grabbing my daggers. How long would I manage to stop myself? How many more slaps would I be able to endure before I lost all logic and grabbed my weapons? I knew that the moment I would wield them, I was as good as dead.

I inhaled deeply through my nose before letting it all out through my mouth.

I had to keep my head calm and collected. I had to be ready, because Nori would surely find me here very soon now. Unless of course he wasn't looking at the right place…

I remembered the dark underground corridor and the other doors that connected with this room. Maybe Nori's lead had been wrong or incomplete. Maybe he was out there somewhere, waiting in an empty house while Rod was happily waiting in this secret room. I clenched my fist at the thought while yet another loud slap could be heard in the otherwise silent room.

"I'm getting bored…" Rod whined, clanking his tankard loudly against the table. "I know the thief's here girl. My men are currently looking for him in town. Why do you think Bert grabbed you? As soon as the fire erupted, I knew you and those two midgets were around." He grabbed a knife and started to absentmindedly play with it, then, after a loud sigh he stabbed the table and leant back. "Edmund, your turn."

Bert grunted and turned away from me. He shrugged and walked to the table before he sat and started to eat. I blinked. Then my eyes caught movement in my peripheral vision and I just had the time to jump backwards and dodge a punch before it hit my stomach. My eyes widened as I saw the blond man taking one step closer to me. Still sitting, Rod applauded and laughed loudly.

"Oh! She wants to fight back! Great! Edmund, don't damage her too much, I still want her to tell me where that damn little rodent is."

I felt fear and doubt rise inside my chest but I pushed back pessimistic thoughts away from my mind. I might not be able to fight him. But maybe I could be lucky enough to survive a while. Still, I hesitated to take my twin blades out. The man was clearly stronger than me and taller too, but he wasn't holding any weapon. Should I use this to my advantage? Was it some sort of trap?

My mind was overcrowded with thoughts. My eyes were riveted on Edmund's figure while he slowly walked to me.

My hands were trembling slightly.

I was scared.

No.

I wasn't scared, I was petrified.

In a short second my brain provided me with countless scenarios that ended in a similar, painful way. Painful for me of course.

"Don't you want to tell me where that fucking dwarf is? I might tell Edmund to stop if you do." Rod snorted as he crossed his arms over his chest.

Edmund slowly smirked as he took another step.

I forced my lungs to keep on breathing as I automatically took a step back.

"No need to ask anymore, I'm right here Rod."

My heart missed a beat when I heard this voice. There was no doubt about it. Nori was here. I felt relief course through my veins, though my eyes didn't leave that Edmund character. He, on the other hand, was looking around, trying to spot Nori.

I didn't dare feel relieved. Not yet. Nori and I still had three enemies in this place and I wasn't sure we would be able to defeat them quickly. I didn't know the situation outside, I just knew that the fire had been a distraction. We had hoped the men of Rod's group would go outside to help. Apparently this part had worked pretty well, even though Rod had sent them to find Nori, which had been a stupid move. But now, we had to be quick or they would come back and surround us.

I quickly shot glances around.

Nori was nowhere to be seen.

I didn't understand where he was or how he came in. I hadn't seen him or heard him at all. Clearly none of the men had. Once more I was impressed by the dwarf's stealth.

"Show yourself little thief!" Rod growled.

Only then did I realize that he was now standing. He had his mace in hand and was turning wildly in all direction, trying to spot Nori. He looked like a mad animal.

I didn't know where it came from, but I suddenly couldn't help but say loud enough to be heard.

"Please refrain from calling him little."

There was an eerie silence that lasted several long seconds. The three men stared at me with various expression displayed on their face. I could easily recognize stupor and disbelief on the blond man's. The giant looked at me with a quirked eyebrow, but other than that his face was blank. Rod's expression sent a shiver down my spine. He was glaring at me with such hate and disgust that it scared me some more. I hated this man, he was creepy. He snarled at me and was about to talk when a dark shape fell from the ceiling right on top of the giant.

It all happened in just a few seconds.

At one moment Bert was standing there, looking at me, the next he was drowning in his own blood on the floor, letting out strangled gurgles while blood gushed out of the wound on his neck.

And Nori was standing there.

For a short time my breath was caught in my throat.

It wasn't because I was scared or disgusted. Actually my eyes barely glanced at Bert. No. all my attention was suddenly riveted on Nori. And if I were honest, I would say the sight was simply breathtaking.

He stood there proudly as if nothing had just happened. He seemed to completely disregard the fact he had just killed someone in a matter of seconds. For an odd moment I felt that he looked taller than he actually was. He was holding his two daggers. Both blades were dripping droplets of blood and I could see that Nori's sleeves were stained too. He was wearing his coat and his hood but I could easily see his face. His stance seemed careless, but I knew better. His expression was completely blank, except for his eyes that were burning with contained fury.

Nori's eyes had always been the most expressive part of his face. Tonight they were filled with hate and contempt. I seemed unable to look away. And then for the smallest of moment he glimpsed at me. During a short second our eyes met. Emotions flashed in his eyes, too quickly for me to name them. I only hoped he realised I was fine. Or well, as fine as anyone could be in my situation.

Then his eyes were back on Rod who finally shook his head and glared at Nori.

"There you are midget." He snarled. "Here for the beads or the girl?"

It was a bit sad really that he wouldn't blink at the death of one of his men.

Nori didn't say a word. He didn't move either. I was completely focused on him, but luckily I saw Edmund move from the corner of my eyes. He was jumping in my direction and it was only my reflexes that allowed me to escape his extended arms.

Nori hadn't moved but I knew his eyes had followed my every moves.

I glared at Edmund and took several steps back.

The situation was unsurprisingly tense.

Suddenly I saw Rod jump forward. Nori moved quickly, stepping back in a bounce while his arm made a strange, wide move. Then Edmund was on his knees, grunting and holding one of his thighs. I didn't even try to pay attention to what was going on around. I was completely certain that Nori would deal with Rod. I sprinted toward the still kneeling form of the blond man while swiftly unsheathing one of my daggers. I stopped when I found myself in Edmund's back, my blade against his neck, my other hand grabbing his hair.

"Do not try to move or I'll cut your carotid. You'd bled out in seconds." My voice was unnaturally cold, almost clinical.

I pressed the cold metal against the side of his neck and glanced towards Nori.

I felt fear rise in my heart as I saw him fight against Rod. The man was wielding his spiked mace with deadly accuracy, aiming precisely at Nori's head. Nori was quicker but he was clearly disadvantaged by his shorter stature. Right now the dwarf was busy dodging.

I felt more than saw Edmund's stance shift and I pressed the blade closer to his neck, drawing a small drop of blood.

"Don't move. I will kill you if you do." I seemed oddly calm about it.

Edmund clearly didn't believe it at all.

He snorted and made to raise his arms toward my hand holding the dagger.

I narrowed my eyes. I didn't even hesitate for a second. I felt the blade cut through the flesh and sliced the side of his neck. My move was swift and precise, almost chirurgical in the most gruesome yet ironical way. I knew exactly where to cut to get right through the muscle to the artery. Immediately blood spurted from the wound and splattered on the floor. As I had said, after several short seconds, Edmund was lying, dead, on the ground at my feet.

I looked at his form and inhaled deeply.

I waited for the guilt, the disgust, the contempt and the regrets to kick in and overwhelm me. They didn't. It was curious to say the least. I didn't understand it at first. I had been so distressed, so upset after the events of Gorm. And now here I was, I had killed yet another man and I was feeling strangely empty. I didn't have the excuse of the blood rage this time. I had been perfectly calm when I had done it. Even now, my heart rate had only quickened slightly. It had been a perfectly conscious move.

I glanced at the blood that had inevitably spurted on my hand and on my blade. It slowly dripped on the floor, leaving small, round drops.

As I looked at the man's body I wondered what had become of me.

I wondered whether it was a monstrous thing to do, killing someone and not feel anything. In my previous world, I would have said only murderers and monsters were like this. Right now though, entirely different thoughts crossed my mind.

I didn't have much choice. I had told him I wouldn't hesitate. He chose not to believe me, he was wrong. His death was his own doing. I couldn't feel guilty about it.

Gingerly I brought my left hand to my hair. I skimmed over the braids on my temple, rolling the beads between my fingers. I did what any dwarf would have done. Then I let my fingers touch the braid in the back of my head. I grazed the large metal bead there. I had seen blood. Twice. And this time it felt as if I truly had killed someone in a battle of sort. I probably hadn't deserved this bead until this very moment. The first man I killed had been an accident. It had shocked me because I had never believed myself capable of doing this.

The body at my feet told an entirely different story. I had chosen to kill him. Calmly I had stated my intentions. It had been my choice. Not an accident. My body hadn't acted on its own. I had controlled my every move. I glanced at Edmund's now pale face. His eyes were open as was his mouth.

No. I didn't regret anything. He had planned to hurt me, to hurt my kin. He was a threat for Nori, for me, and for the other dwarves. I had done nothing wrong. I only protected my own. I could very well be the one lying, dead, on the cold floor. I was rather glad it was him instead of me.

I didn't feel conflicted anymore.

It was time for me to leave my old world's ethic and logic behind. I was leaving with the dwarves now. I was wearing their beads. I loved them and had an embarrassingly strong crush for one of them. My old world seemed far away. It was far away. Too far away to matter anymore. It was a distant past and it shouldn't influence my future anymore.

My future was with the dwarves and if the body at my feet protected it, then it was a good thing.

I took a deep inhale and closed my eyes for a second. It felt as if a weight I hadn't known existed was lifted from my shoulders. I had consciously accepted my actions and it felt amazingly freeing. When I opened my eyes again, it was only to concentrate on Nori's fight.

I hadn't forgotten about him, but I couldn't really help him in any way.

Now that I had only him to focus on though, I felt my heart rate rise. A large lump grew in my throat as my eyes tried to follow the fighters move. I held my breath and my hands clenched reflexively each time Nori barely avoided an attack. My muscles were twitching. I wanted to help. It was pure torture to stay here, uselessly witnessing the fight between the two enemies. But I had to suffer through it. I knew perfectly well that if I tried to help, chances were I would end up making a mess of things. So I had to stay here. Stand motionlessly as Nori fought for his life.

It hurt. It hurt terribly.

My eyes wouldn't leave him. Anything could have happened right then as my whole body and mind was only focusing on Nori. His hood had fallen from his face and I could easily see him. He was entirely focused on Rod. I could see blood on his right arm, where one of the spikes of Rod's weapon had managed to cut him. Thankfully Rod was clearly starting to tire and I easily spotted one bloody injury on his right thigh and another one on his side.

Nori didn't even seem to be tired at all.

I had no idea how long the fight lasted, but suddenly Rod lost his balance and stumbled backwards.

Nori didn't waste a second and jumped at him.

Even though everything happened quickly, my brain seemed to register plenty of details.

I saw a spark of triumph alight in Nori's eyes. I saw fury and disbelief on Rod's face. I saw Nori's burrowed brows and his small smirk. And I saw how Rod tried belatedly to lift his spiked mace to hit Nori.

And then Nori crashed into Rod and both fell to the ground, behind the table away from my sight.

I didn't wait to see the outcome, I immediately ran to the other side of the table. The sight I was met with was slightly disturbing, but it didn't matter.

Nori was straddling Rod's torso.

His face and the front of his tunic were splattered with blood. His hands were crimson and still clenched around his daggers. I shivered. Nori had never looked so dangerous, so murderous. But oddly I felt myself breathe normally again. I hadn't even realized that I had been holding my breath until then. Even drenched in his enemy's blood, Nori couldn't scare me away.

Quickly, I rushed to kneel next to Nori.

His eyes were riveted to Rod.

I turned to look at the man. My gaze travelled from the various bloody injuries on his chest, proof that Nori had hit him repeatedly, to his face. He died with a frightening expression plastered on his features and I quickly averted my eyes. Nori still hadn't moved, hadn't talked.

He seemed frozen.

Gingerly I grazed his shoulder.

That seemed to awake him.

I heard the clattering sound of his daggers hitting the ground as Nori's hands lifted toward Rod's neck. I saw that he was trembling and heard his shuddering breath. Looking up I could easily spot tears in his eyes. That made my heart clench as my gaze turned toward the necklace Rod wore. Was it the right one? Was Nori's reaction due to relief and happiness or despair?

I could only look helplessly as Nori's fingers skimmed a hairbreadth away over the beads.

He seemed to stop then and as I observed him, I realized he was looking at his bloodied fingers. Following a hunch I quickly took my dagger and tore a part of Rod's shirt. Nori still hadn't moved when I slowly, cautiously started to wipe away the blood from his fingers. He wasn't looking at his hands anymore and I wondered whether he realized what I was doing. I felt him shudder and he squeezed my hands lightly. Clearly he was at least conscious of what was going on around him. His gaze though didn't leave the beads.

Then slowly he leant and took the necklace away from Rod's neck. I heard him gasp, forcing me to look back at him. He was crying. Tears were silently running from his grey eyes to his cheek before disappearing in his beautiful beard. The sight made my heart clench but I couldn't say whether it was from pain or from another emotion. I wanted to wipe his tears away. My hands were slightly shacking at the moment and I wasn't sure why they were. I bit my lip and looked back at Nori. Damn it. Seeing him like this was making my heart clench and somersault oddly in my ribcage. The way I saw it, these tears didn't portray him as weak. On the contrary. If I hadn't had a huge crush on him before that, I was quite certain that I would have after seeing him like this.

I held my breath and hesitated only for a second before I placed my hand on Nori's arm. Immediately his eyes met mine. He must have seen my hesitation because he silently nodded.

I felt happier then than I had in a very long time.

It was the right one.

Nori's quest had finally come to an end.

I let out a disbelieving, happy chuckle and felt tears prickle in the corner of my eyes.

Nori apparently couldn't detach his eyes from the beads for a long time because he was already staring at them in wonder and disbelief.

I was truly happy for him. Actually, happy didn't even come close to describing what I felt at the moment. I could only imagine what Nori could be feeling. It was all too intense. It felt almost like a dream. I couldn't help but squeeze Nori's arm, chuckling some more. I wanted to hold him, to hug him, but I refrained to do so. It wasn't the right time for me to let my crush take over my brain.

At some point though, an annoying voice in my head whispered that we shouldn't stay here. The other men would probably come back at some point and if they found us in the middle of this bloodbath I didn't want to think about what they would do. I stood up and looked around. My headache had been forgotten for a short while, but it was still present, if not as painful as earlier. I looked at my dagger and pulled a face at the sight of the blood on it. I couldn't sheath it back like this. I let my gaze slide over the various items and things that littered the floor or were hanging on the walls. I took a piece of cloth that had been on the table and used it to wipe the blood of the blade before I sheathed it back. There seemed to be nothing of importance in this room.

Well, at least that was what I thought until my eyes caught sight of something unexpected on the floor nearby where Bert's body lay. I actually did a double take because I had discarded this object at first. But now that I was walking towards it, I felt a large smile pull at my lips. Bert had been kind enough to take my staff with him. It was probably why I had been left alone for a minute before he closed the door of the corridor. The giant most likely hadn't wanted to leave any trace of my presence behind. I felt undeniably happy to see my wooden weapon here. I would have been sad to lose it. It had been given to me by my friends, my kin. Gimli had carved the protections' runes on it.

I didn't hesitate to grab it and then I let my fingers travel along the cold wood. I traced the runes and smiled wider still. Then only did I turn back towards Nori. In the back of my mind I wondered how strange it was for someone to be happy because of a wooden staff. I didn't care much whether it looked crazy or not, but I cared about these weapons.

Nori was now standing too. I came closer to him and found out he had wiped his face and sheathed his daggers. The necklace was now in his hand and he seemed to hesitate.

I cleared my throat lightly, catching his attention.

"Do you want me to put it around your neck?"

He didn't answer at first and he looked back at the five beads stringed on the metallic chain. Then he nodded and I stepped closer. His eyes still shone with emotions. Kindly I smiled at him and cautiously took the necklace. It was heavier than what I would have thought. I didn't waste time even though I really wanted to have a proper look at it. I would have time later. As soon as the necklace was secured around his neck, Nori took the beads in his hands and only hesitated for a second before he tugged them under his tunic.

"We…" His voice was strangled with emotions and he cleared his throat before continuing. "We should go."

I nodded and asked him.

"Where did you come from anyway? I didn't see you."

He pointed at the ceiling and as I craned my neck I saw the wooden beams in an entirely new way.

"How did you arrive here anyway?" He frowned. "You weren't supposed to come here. Amelia, you promised me…"

"I know." I cut in. "I'm really sorry, but I didn't really have a choice. That giant caught me as I was running back to the meeting point." I was a bit annoyed that he would think I had come here willingly, still I continued. "Rod said he knew when the fire started that we were behind it. He sent his men outside to catch us, I just happened to pass by where that huge oaf came out."

He glared in direction of the dead giant, sighed and caught my wrist.

"Are you alright?" He asked, observing me intently.

I couldn't lie to him, not when he looked at me that way. Still, we both knew now wasn't the time for this.

"I'll be fine."

His face hardened and he sent yet another useless glare in the cadaver's direction before he spoke again.

"Come. Let's go. We'll talk later, once we're safe."

I pursed my lips and nodded. He was right.

I followed him to the ladder and he quickly went up as I followed him. I was a bit slower than him but he didn't seem to mind. He opened the hatch carefully and noiselessly disappeared in the room. I was less quiet than him too, but it didn't matter much. The room I arrived in was completely empty. We closed the hatch back and once more I found myself crouching behind Nori as he guided me through the corridors and later the streets.

This time, maybe luck was on our side or maybe our plan had just worked in our favour in the end, but it didn't take much time before we were running in the forest.

Nori held my hand tightly, helping me with my balance, guiding me through the foliage until we finally arrived to our meeting point. I felt my heart froze at first when I realized than Fili wasn't here. Immediately terrible thoughts started to cross my mind as I imagined we now had to plan a rescue mission for our friend. I was just about to talk about it to Nori, when he spoke.

"Get down lad. You're no monkey. Come, we're leaving this place tonight."

I blinked before I looked up. I couldn't see anything through the dense foliage. Even if it hadn't been the middle of the night, I was certain I wouldn't have seen anything. I didn't hear anything either. For me the forest was simply its usual peaceful quiet. How could Nori actually know that Fili was up there? Was Fili really up there?

I was starting to doubt it when I heard the branches shake and after a short while, Fili fell down nearby along with a rain of twigs and leaves. Some even stuck out of the blond dwarf's mane. I couldn't help but smile.

"Amelia!" He immediately said. "Where were you? I waited for you at the edge of the forest for awhile before I came here." All the while he walked toward me and as his gaze fell on my sleeves he exclaimed. "Mahal! Is that blood? What happened?"

"She ended up in Rod's hideout." Nori answered in my stead.

He was about to add something but I saw him hesitate before he bit his lip. That was not something I was used to see him do. He put his hand on Fili's shoulder and patted it before he spoke.

"Please, Fili. Can you go gather our bags?"

Fili's eyes passed from me to Nori and he paused for a second before he nodded and simply left. He was close by, I knew that though. Nori stepped closer to me and our eyes met. Suddenly he looked uncertain, worried even and I couldn't understand why. I didn't move or speak when I saw his hand rise. He gingerly caressed my cheekbone with his knuckles before he whispered.

"Mizimul, are you alright?"

I tilted my head and tried to forget about my rapidly beating heart. I swallowed thickly before I decided to answer.

"Of course."

"Did they hurt you?" His voice was tinted with an edge of anger.

"They're dead. I'm fine Nori." My voice was barely above a whisper and I saw him flinch before he shifted uneasily.

He avoided my gaze for a second and I wondered what had him so worried. He should only be feeling happiness and relief right now. It didn't make sense for him to be so concerned.

"Amelia, Mizimul…How do you feel? I mean about…" He trailed of, clearly unsure.

Suddenly the pieces fell into place and I understood what he meant. I didn't even realize that one of my hands was now pressed against his left cheek. I locked my gaze in his and tried to convey how serious and honest I was.

"I'm fine Nori. Really. If you're worried about this blond man I killed, don't be. I'm fine with it."

"Really?" He searched my eyes, probably for any sign of uncertainty.

"I'm not happy about it. I didn't enjoy it. But I'm fine with it." I repeated.

I hadn't realized how close we stood to one another until then. I could feel my stomach tighten in knots as my heart was beating wildly. My breath itched and it was slightly disturbing to realize that I wanted to kiss him right here and then. It just wasn't the right time for this. Still, I wanted nothing more.

It suddenly dawned on me how strong my crush for him actually was.

I blushed and looked away. His emotions, the ones reflected in his eyes, were just too intense. I couldn't bear to look at them right now. His eyes, his emotions, it made my heart somersault in my chest.

I had to step away.

It was somehow frightening to realize just how much I could feel for him. I was honestly afraid. These feelings were too strong. It scared me.

We both stepped back at the same time. I was glad we did because Fili chose that moment to reappear.

The three of us remained silent for an awkward moment before Nori finally took charge of our little group again. In a matter of minutes we were back on the road, so to speak, and heading towards home.

We pushed it a bit that day. We spent a good part of the night walking, only stopping at dawn for a quick, cold breakfast, and then continued on our way to the Halls. We stopped to camp only in the late afternoon and I was truly exhausted by then. The night had been long, eventful, and I was tired. Even if I understood perfectly why Nori might want to be in the Halls as soon as possible, right now I couldn't have taken a step further even if I wanted to.

It was in those moments, when I was incredibly tired by a crazy day spent entirely walking, almost jogging, in the woods, that I missed my past world's technology the most. What would have I given right now for a bottle of fresh soda, or fresh juice. And a bar of chocolate! Oh Mahal, the sweet bliss it would have been right then. And after eating and drinking such marvellously sweet food, I would just have to light a flashlight and use some campers stuff to light a fire in a short time.

But right now, I couldn't have any of those, probably never would ever again. As I let my bag slip to the ground I stretched a bit and groaned as I felt my stiff muscles protest. Then I looked at Nori. He seemed completely out of it, his fingers were holding the beads that still hanged around his neck. It seemed as if his eyes were unseeing completely.

Fili was already gathering wood and I decided to give Nori some time. I didn't really remember how long he had spent looking for this necklace, but I could understand how shocking it must be for him. After decades spent working towards one goal, how life shattering it must be to see that goal finally achieved.

Fili glanced at me and grinned joyously. It was obvious he was tired, but clearly the mood was light that night. And to be honest, despite my exhaustion, I was happy too. Gathering all the energy I had left, I stood back up and nodded at the blond dwarf. The both of us started to circle in the woods near the camp, gathering wood. I followed Fili's instruction, grabbing the pieces of wood he pointed at me; dry wood would burn better than green. And together we prepared the camp. Nori was sitting, his back against a trunk, and his face hidden in the shadows. I decided to leave him alone some more while Fili handed me the tools I would need to light the fire.

"Come on Amelia, you won't learn if you don't practice. And you should really practice a lot."

He was smirking as I took the flint and steel I hated so much. Why couldn't they have matches? That would be much easier. I sighed as I sat in front of the pile of dry twigs and leaves. At least I could sit. After gathering the wood, I didn't think that my legs would carry me anywhere else that evening. I forlornly made a pile of twigs in front of me.

"It's not that hard." Fili sat next to me, clearly anticipating a funny entertainment.

"Easy for you to say." I groaned.

His smile broadened and he lightly patted my shoulder.

"Actually, it took me ages to get the hang of it. Kili took way more. As a dwarfling when he couldn't light his fire he would pout and glare at it. I swear his eyes could have lighted the thing better than his hands."

I chuckled while the blond dwarf smiled and recalled events of his childhood. All the while I was absentmindedly trying to get a stupid spark to fall on the twigs. But honestly I wasn't focusing quite as much as I usually did.

Well, until I caught something from the corner of my eyes while I was laughing about one of Fili's stories.

"Oh my god!" I exclaimed and jumped to my feet, all tiredness suddenly forgotten.

Immediately, Nori snapped out of his daze and was standing nearby.

"What? What is it?"

"I did it! Look Nori, I did it!" I joyously explained, pointing at the small pile of twigs that was now slowly burning.

Completely lost in my happy moment, I bounced and threw my arms around Nori's neck. I hugged him while I laughed. I couldn't believe I had managed to light that damn pile of twigs. Apparently, my reaction was the funniest thing ever for Fili, who was holding his side while laughing loudly. Nori was clearly surprised at first but then I felt one of his arms around my waist. When I stepped back, cheeks pink, I saw he was smiling kindly at me.

It always made my heart beat faster when he smiled like this. It was so different from his usual smirk. It was gentle, sweet, almost tender.

"Good job Amelia." Fili managed to say between two chuckles. "I didn't think you'd react quite like that though."

"Too bad you have to start all over again." Nori's smirk was back.

"What do you mean?" I asked.

"Look."

My gaze followed the direction his finger was pointing to and I could help but curse when my eyes fell on the now extinguished and burnt pile of twigs.

"Ow shit. You got to be kidding me."

It truly was rare for me to speak like that. My aunt had hated it and each time I would curse or swear, I would have to hear a long rant about how a young girl shouldn't speak that way. Apparently it surprised both Nori and Fili, but their reaction was different. The both of them chuckled and Nori kindly patted my shoulder.

"Go on. You know you can do it now."

"I know I can." I said bitterly. "But I still have no idea how I did."

Around that time Nori disappeared in the forest. I had no idea where he went, but when he came back he had a rabbit in his hand and Fili had lighted the fire. I had managed twice more to burn the twigs, but I couldn't get them to light the whole wood. It truly was an art I was far from mastering.

After dinner, Fili immediately went to sleep while Nori took the first watch. At first I tried to sleep too, but as minutes passed and my eyes were still wide open, I decided that there was no use in trying. Even though I was tired, my body apparently didn't want to sleep.

I walked closer to Nori who was sitting at the edge of our camp, hidden in the shadows as usual.

"You should be sleeping."

"I can't."

I sat next to him. Our shoulders were almost touching and I could feel the heat from his body. I wanted to lean against him and close my eyes. I glanced at him and saw his fingers were once more holding the beads.

We remained silent for awhile.

There were many things I wanted to say. Yes, there were many things that I had to tell him. I hadn't forgotten our discussion that had been interrupted by Fili. I wondered what Nori had been about to tell me. My heart clenched painfully at the thought that my crush was one sided. But fear crept in me when I dared hope it might not be.

Everything was so complicated, almost impossible when I thought about it.

Putting aside the fact that Nori might or not want to have a relationship with anyone, let alone me, there was also the fact that I was far from being a dwarf. And then again, not being a dwarf didn't simply mean I didn't look like what was supposed to be pretty. If only it was only the matter of my missing beard...but no. Things were more complicated than a stupid question of facial hairiness. Sadly there was the matter of our ages too. I didn't care that Nori was over a hundred years older than me, though that was quite the age gap. No, what I thought about was the fact that I would die maybe a hundred years before him. And that was if I was lucky. From what little I knew about dwarves, they were extremely loyal. Did that mean that they wouldn't remarry? Could I ask these kinds of questions to someone? Dared I? I knew that the answers would probably scare me anyway...

I didn't realize I had let out a forlorn sigh until Nori spoke.

"What has you so sad?" He whispered.

It startled me a bit at first. Then I pondered on my options. Should I say something now? When we were in the middle of nowhere and there was no possibility to avoid each other for the next coming days? If I waited to be in Thorin's Halls and things grew awkward between me and Nori, at least I would have some places to go to in order to hide from him and the awkwardness. It was far from an ideal solution, I knew, but I couldn't help but behave slightly cowardly right now.

"How are you feeling? About the necklace I mean."

Yes. I was a coward. Nori wasn't stupid and I saw him glance at me and quirk an eyebrow. I held my breath, wondering whether he would insist or not. Thankfully he didn't and I could breathe again.

"I'm not sure." He muttered. "I've been spending so long…hoped for so long. I can't believe it."

I smiled, my heart was swelling with all the emotions I was feeling right now. I had no idea why, but my body seemed to take control over my mind. I saw my hand kindly press against Nori's left cheek as I twisted my upper body to get a better look at him. Then slowly I leant and kissed his right cheek, just above his beard. It tickled my lower lip a bit and I found I liked the feeling. My thumb slowly skimmed over Nori's cheekbone as I was careful not to touch his braided beard. I still wasn't certain what that would mean.

As I leant back away, I saw that Nori's eyes were wide open and staring at me in slight disbelief.

I didn't wait for him to gather his wits back. Apparently my cowardice had no limit that day. I quickly stood and went back to my bedroll. Sleep eluded me for awhile longer but I remained as immobile as I could.

Finally I fell asleep, still thinking about Nori.

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><p>I was glad to see the massive doors of Thorin's Halls again.<p>

The trip back hadn't been really pleasant. Of course the mood was rather joyous, but we could have cut the air between me and Nori with a knife. He seemed unable to be close to me and I was as fine with it as I hated it. My mind was a mess.

I wanted him close, but his closeness frightened me.

I had no idea what I could do or how I should act.

Fili had probably realized it, but the kind dwarf was trying to keep the mood light and cheery. The two of us spent quite some time simply talking about our childhoods. I found out that he had been really young when his father died and that Kili could barely remember him. He told me about how Kili was his best friend and how he had more than once been in a fight with his brother by his side.

Nori was mostly silent. Guiding us back through yet another weird and tricky path, he was either holding on his beads or frowning, clearly thinking hard about one thing or another. From time to time I could have sworn that I felt his eyes on me, but each time I turned my gaze towards him, he was looking elsewhere.

I was starting to believe I was crazy. It probably explained the relief that washed over me when I saw the paved way that went up to the entrance of the Halls and its massive doors.

There was no one waiting for us this time. It wasn't as if anyone had expected troubles and they had no idea that we had to deal with the mercenaries. I followed Nori, with Fili at my side, as we passed through the main Hall and the market towards the King's Hall.

We probably had quite a lot of explaining to do. I wondered for a brief instant what Nori would say about the necklace. Would the King be angry that Nori put Fili in danger for the sake of some beads? Would he banish Nori in his wrath? Or would he understand? From what I had experienced of the King's moods, it could be any of those reactions. I truly didn't know what to expect of him and it made me suddenly a bit nervous.

As we went further in the Halls and passed through the doors that led to the King's Hall, I tried to guess what would happen. My thoughts were broken when I heard voices I knew well call us as we approached the dais.

"We didn't expect you before a few days still!" Balin said while smiling kindly at me.

Nori was about to speak but the King was quicker. His icy blue stare hadn't missed the state of our clothes. We looked downright awful. None of us had felt the need or the will to clean the blood and soot away at first, and then later we only wanted to go home. Washing ourselves could wait. When I thought about it though, I felt a bit ashamed, especially as I had never been quite so lenient with cleanliness and hygiene before I ended up here. I hadn't much time to think about it as the King's words made everyone frown.

"You all look like you've been through battle." He stated sharply before looking at each of us.

His eyes lingered on my face, still marked by the cut and the dried blood, and then my muddied tunic, which was drenched in dark, dried blood too. He then looked at Fili's dishevelled state, his sooty clothes and the few cuts on his tunic before he finally set his gaze on Nori.

"What happened this time?" He sighed and pinched the bridge of his nose in annoyance.

Fili and I exchanged a glance before we looked at Nori, but the thief seemed to hesitate. It wasn't hard to guess that Nori didn't want to tell his King how the Crown Prince had been endangered by his personal problems. Well, to my opinion it wasn't entirely like that, but I somehow knew that was how Nori saw it.

Words blurted out of my mouth before I could think and all eyes were suddenly on me.

"We got rid of a small problem, that's all."

There was a short, eerie silence in the room until the King took a step in my direction. His intense blue stare had the tendency to make me squirm. This time was no exception.

"A small problem?"

Before either Nori or I could talk, Fili spoke up.

"The man from Gorm. The leader of the group that has been causing us problems." He said after clearing his throat.

"What about him?" Gloin's frown couldn't get any deeper.

"We kinda...killed him?" It sounded like a question and I felt myself blush.

"You kinda killed him." The King repeated disbelievingly.

Nori sighed and pressed two fingers on his eyes.

"First night we arrived in Archet, we couldn't get in the regular inn. We made our way to the second one…"

"The second one? You brought Amelia in that place?" Balin spluttered, clearly shocked and not happy at all.

"We didn't have much choice. It was that or sleeping under the rain once more." I defended before Nori continued to explain the events.

"In there we saw Rod. The man that attacked them in Gorm and that I knew to be the leader of a band of honourless miscreants." The King snorted at that but Nori ignored him. "We waited for the night to fall in order to leave Archet safely. They were waiting for us outside and they chased us far into the woods."

"When did you kill that leader?" The King asked sharply.

"That was later." Fili answered as Nori had remained silent.

"Later?"

"We, that is, Fili and I, decided that it would be stupid to come back here. The men would leave and we would lose them again. They were attacking our caravans, so Fili and I convinced Nori to go back to Archet, kill Rod and come back here." I said as quickly as I could.

The blue eyes were once more staring at me and I tried my best to stay collected and calm.

"You and Fili decided." The King said alarmingly calmly. "You. A girl. A human girl with no experience of these things whatsoever decided."

Ouch. Put like this, it really didn't sound good. Still I squared my shoulders and lifted my chin to look in the King's eyes.

"Do you mean to say you'd rather we lost them?"

His glare made my heart beat faster in fear. These dwarves really weren't good for my health. I would die of heart failure before anything else.

Nori surprised everyone then when he spoke up.

"The three of us decided. There are other reasons why we went back. Getting rid of Rod for the caravans' safety was but one of them."

"What was the other?" The King turned to face the thief.

Nori slowly took the necklace from his neck and held it firmly in his fist. It was obvious to all that he was reluctant to show it, and much more to hand it over to anyone. Gloin and Balin looked curious but stayed a bit back as Nori extended his arm towards the King. When he opened his fingers to reveal the beads, I heard the sharp intake of breath that our King took. Immediately Balin and Gloin came closer and their reactions were rather similar.

The silence was heavy for a short while until the King spoke.

"I know these. I remember how your father carved them himself. I remember how proud and happy he was to wear so many."

His fingers hovered inches above the metal, yet he didn't dare touch them. After taking a slow breath he put one hand on Nori's shoulder and looked straight in his eyes.

"I am glad that they found their way back to your family. You made your ancestors proud by reclaiming them."

Nori didn't say a word but nodded.

The King turned then to look at Fili and me. We were still standing next to each other, waiting patiently.

"And I'm proud of the two of you too." He said before embracing his nephew with one arm.

For a short second I was afraid he would bring me into his embrace too, that would be awkward, but to my relief he didn't.

"You might not be such a bad addition to our Halls in the end." He said while staring at me.

I saw a small, short lived smirk tug at the corner of his lips. It was the only sign that he didn't mean any offense. I took it as an apology of sort and inclined my head.

"I told you I would do my best to be useful."

He nodded then in acknowledgement to this backward way we apparently chose to apologize to each other. He then talked a bit louder at the whole group.

"Nori, you should go back bring the news to your brothers. We can all wait a few hours before we get to hear a detailed tale of your mission. We will talk about it tonight."

The King's words were obeyed immediately as Nori gestured for me to follow him. I meant to go with him but a sudden hunch made me grab his arm.

"I'm not sure I should follow you Nori." I said softly. "This is something important for you, Dori and Ori. I think you should be all left alone."

"It is important for our family. You're part of it." Nori whispered back, though his voice was slightly strangled when he said the last part.

My voice sounded so sad when I spoke then, that I barely recognized myself. But worse than that, the next words that came out of my mouth came out completely unexpectedly. I had no idea where they had come from.

"Am I?"

Two words. Two simple words. Yet they held so much meaning right then.

I suddenly let go of Nori's arm, as if I was burnt by the touch, and took a step back. I forced a smile on my face and avoided looking at Nori.

"I'll be with Gloin and Danà." I breathed out before turning my back to Nori and walking back to the other dwarves.

Nori didn't say anything, or at least I didn't hear him. I didn't see the sheer hurt that crossed his face either, nor did I realize that he seemed to recoil a bit. Feeling suddenly sick I thought for a second that I would fall on the floor. Somehow I managed to keep my two feet grounded and stood a bit straighter.

Inside I was crying. Inside I was yelling. Inside I felt like I was slowly dying.

I didn't want to be a simple part of this family. Yet I wanted it. My emotions were all over the place. I didn't know what to think or feel anymore. Turning back around to face the other dwarves, I quickly forced a smile on my lips and went to hug Balin, then Gloin.

I could only hope they didn't realize that I lingered a bit simply because I just needed to be hugged right then.

"So, lass. Fili was telling us about this battle. How did you fare?" Gloin gruffly asked.

My mind was a complete mess as I was still trying to fathom why I would say such a thing to Nori. I considered Dori and Ori like I did uncle and brothers. They were family for my heart. But Nori was different. This crush was muddling my brain. I couldn't be Nori's sister. I really believed I couldn't, not until that silly crush was under control. Right now, it was murmuring in my head that Nori wasn't really family, even though I hoped he would one day, and that Dori and Ori weren't either, and so that it wasn't wrong to hope.

I hated myself.

Sighing deeply and struggling to keep the smile on my face, I looked up at Gloin and shrugged.

"I survived."

That made him laugh loudly as he patted my shoulder so strongly that it almost sent me flying across the room. Fili and his uncle had left, probably to meet with Dís and I was left alone with Balin and Gloin. None of them commented on the fact that I had stayed with them. I was glad for their silence on that matter, even though I wasn't entirely sure it was intentional.

"Have you had the time to clean that wound properly, my dear?" Balin pushed my chin a bit to get a better look on my cheek.

"I cleaned it with thyme. Don't worry. But I couldn't really bandage my whole head." I replied with a small smirk.

I really missed modern things from time to time. Here, the only way I could apply a bandage on my cheek to keep the cut clean, would be if I rolled said bandage around my whole head. That would look stupid, especially for a simple cut. So I had let it like this.

"What happened to the man who did this?" Balin inquired, his eyes suddenly rather hard.

"Nori killed him." I didn't even blink as I looked at my older guardian.

"Good."

After that simple exchange, Gloin insisted that I followed him back to his house. Honestly I was glad. I wanted to see Danà. The older woman's presence was soothing and maybe I would find it in me to talk with her…or maybe not.

As soon as she saw me, she started to fuss over me and I had barely passed the threshold to their home that I was ushered back outside, towards the baths. Gloin had kindly kept my bag and staff as Danà all but pulled me out of their home. She was just next to me, holding a large, fluffy towel, some soap and a clean dress that she would lend me for the evening.

I thought that she would just accompany me to the entrance of the baths, but she actually pushed me in and followed me before she closed the small door behind her.

"Now. In you go. And start to talk."

I blinked at hearing her kind, yet somehow sharp, voice. I stood there, frozen, for several seconds before she sighed.

"I can guess something happened. Why aren't you with Nori, Dori and Ori? You wouldn't have come directly to us if you were perfectly fine. Now out with it. What happened?"

I didn't know how I felt right then. It was an odd and inexplicable mixture of relief and fear. I remained silent but turned my back to her and started to open my tunic. Only then did I realize that my hands were shaking slightly.

Danà was right, it was odd for me not to be with the brothers. I wondered whether Ori and Dori would be hurt by my actions. Probably not. They would be too moved by the beads. Nori for once would bring back something they would be really happy about. My mind wandered a bit while I removed my tunic and breeches, then the cotton shirt I wore, and was left in my undergarments and bindings.

Even though the seamstresses had found it peculiar, well weird actually, they had agreed to help me sew undergarments that were closer to the panties I used to wear. I really had no idea how I could have spend my life with the extremely weird and long garments women here wore. So I was now standing in front of Danà with bindings around my chest and panties-like garments. It should have been embarrassing, but at this instant, I didn't care. Maybe that, more than anything else, made me realize that I really wasn't thinking straight. Had I been my usual self, my face would have been bright red right then.

Danà had remained silent. She knew I could be very reluctant to talk. That woman was as stubborn and strong headed as any dwarf I knew, but she was more patient than most. Her quiet presence was already starting to calm me a bit. Finally I turned my head slightly until I could see her from the corner of my eye.

"Danà, what does it mean when someone touch another one's braids?"

She quirked an eyebrow at my question and crossed her arms over her chest. I averted my gaze and chose not to look at her while she answered.

"It can mean a lot of things. When I'm braiding your hair, or when one of your kin is braiding your hair, then it means we care. It means we see each other as kin and family. It means we trust each other. It is something really intimate, you wouldn't let a stranger, someone you don't know, trust or care deeply for, touch your hair."

I nodded. I knew that already.

"But what if you touch someone's braids? I don't mean when you braid it, I just mean touching the braid in someone's hair." My throat was rather tight and my voice really weak.

Danà remained silent and took a seat on the small bench, next to where she had put the towel and clean dress. She gestured for me to get inside the bath. I knew she wouldn't answer until I obeyed so I quickly finished undressing, removing the bindings first and jumped in the water. It was blissfully warm. Not hot, but just warm, and that was amazing after the cold midnight bath in the river and the cold rain showers I had experienced in the past weeks.

I sighed contentedly.

Then I heard Danà stand up and she started to untie my hair while she spoke. Softly she let her fingers brush them, untangling knots, before she started to remove my beads one by one. She silently started to undo my braids before she spoke.

"There might be several meanings. A brother touching a sibling's braid means they're close. Once again it shows their care. A mother touching her child's, it shows her love too. All in all it is a very tender gesture."

I shuddered when I heard that.

Images of that night I had spent with Nori came back to me. At that time I had carelessly caressed his braided beard. And he had stopped me. He had asked me not to do that. He didn't want me to do that.

I tried to swallow back the lump in my throat to no avail.

Tears were menacing to pool in my eyes.

Quickly I ducked under water, not caring that Danà hadn't finished removing my braids.

"Amelia!" She exclaimed as I inadvertently splashed water around.

When I came out of the water, she had walked to the side of the bath and was now standing there, eyes narrowed at me. I couldn't hide my face from her. It would be stupidly childish to turn my back to her, not to mention very rude too.

"What happened during that bloody trip to make you so skittish?" She asked sharply.

I sighed and tilted my head, removing the water from my eyes and ears.

My cheek and hand burnt a bit, the cuts weren't perfectly healed yet and I had several purplish bruises. Actually I had a lot of bruises. Ignoring the small stinging pain I pondered on what I should do right then. If I were back in my old world, I probably would talk to my aunt. Or at least I thought I might. Maybe not. I didn't want to talk about it. Incidentally Danà's question wasn't really touching my problem. So I chose to answer, in detail. I told her about the rain and the fact we didn't follow the main road. I told her about the disgusting barn they called an inn. I told her about Rod and our escape in the night, about the fight and the river, about the hypothermia and how I woke in Nori's arms, and ultimately about our plan and what had happened that night.

When I finally stopped, Danà had had the time to wash my hair and braided them again. I was now standing in the fluffy towel, all clean and refreshed, and feeling somehow a bit lighter. It was strange. I hadn't talked about anything that really concerned me, but I felt as if I had poured all my frustration and sadness out. It let me feeling significantly better and my mind was suddenly clearer.

"Well, that was an eventful trip." Danà commented evenly. "I'm truly glad you and Fili convinced Nori to stay there until you had the beads."

She was looking at me intently and it was a bit unnerving. I blushed a bit as she helped me with my bindings, I really wasn't that good with those, and I quickly dressed.

"Amelia, you did well. I can't begin to tell you how much it means for us. Those beads…they are carved at a child's birth. When someone marries, he will add a rune on his bead. The parental beads are given and kept by the children after their deaths. I'm still wearing my mother's." She explained before pointing at one seemingly classic bead in her hair.

I could understand, or guess at least, the importance of those beads. It had been fairly obvious that they were when I knew that Nori had spent most of his life looking for them. I hadn't told that bit of information to Danà though, that was Nori's to tell to whom he wanted to. I had only recalled the past week's events.

"I still don't understand what had you so upset though." Danà finally said. "You had some eventful weeks, but I don't understand why it would make you unwilling to see Dori and Ori. Is it…" She seemed to hesitate a bit before she asked. "Is it because of that man you killed?"

I blinked. I had honestly not even thought twice about him. I had even already forgotten his name. Was it Ed? Burt? No, that had been the giant…hadn't it? Well, it didn't matter.

"No. I truly don't care much about him." I answered with a shrug.

I didn't even feel guilty about it. He had wanted to hurt me, I had killed him. End of the story.

"Then, why accompany Gloin back to our home?" Danà insisted, clearly wanting some answers.

"Is it so unbelievable that I might simply want to see you?" I replied, grabbing my dirty clothes and already moving to the door.

Danà halted me, a hand on my shoulder and narrowed eyes observing me sharply.

"Amelia. Dear child, Mahal knows I love you, but I hate liars." Her voice was cold and it reminded me of my aunt when she scolded me. "I know you. I know you love me, Gloin and Gimli. But I know you love the brothers more." Her tone was kinder now. "So, why risk and hurt them and yourself by not going directly home?"

"Because. Nori is bringing back their beads. It's a moment to share with your family, not strangers." I replied a bit distressed and snappishly.

Suddenly the turmoil inside that had been calmed down by the bath and the discussion raged again.

"But, you're no stranger. You're fam…" Danà started to blurt out before I completely snapped.

"No I'm not! I'm not family! I'm not of their blood! I might be Dori's ward, but I'm not from their family. Dori isn't my father or brother. Ori isn't my brother." I almost yelled before my voice shamefully broke. "Nori…Nori isn't…he isn't my brother! He isn't!"

I bit my lower lip, tears in my eyes as I refused to look at Danà. My arms were tightly holding my bundle of clothes, as if they could protect me from anything. My breath was a bit ragged and my brain once more completely clouded.

Nori wasn't my brother...he wasn't...he wasn't!

My heart was throbbing painfully now that I had finally voiced this simple sentence. Nori wasn't my brother. He wasn't. It wasn't wrong for me to like him, to love him. My crush for him wasn't something dirty. It wasn't anything wrong or dirty because I wasn't his sister and he wasn't my brother. We were strangers. Nothing but two strangers who came to live together because of weird circumstances.

I had the right to feel like this.

I …

Had I? Could I?

I groaned, grabbing a fistful of my hair and shutting my eyes. I had to control those feelings. I had to find a way to make them stop. Nori probably didn't want this. He had pushed my hand away. He froze every time I touched him. He didn't want people to imagine things about us. Who was to say that he thought about my honour and not his? After all, I was no dwarf. Putting aside everything else, I was still a human. A human, with a stupid human face and stupidly weak...and with a stupidly short life span.

It was the feeling of two strong arms encasing me close to a chest that broke my mind from its whirling thoughts.

"Oh child…" Danà sighed sadly. "Of course they're not your brothers. But you do belong here with us. You know that, right? You belong here."

She kept talking lowly, whispering in my ear as I let my head rest on her shoulder. I let her hand soothingly caress my hair and I listened to the sound of her voice.

I wanted so much to believe her words. I wanted to belong.

To belong here, with them…

With…

* * *

><p><strong>AN: Hi everyone! Thanks a lot for all the kind reviews :) it's always a pleasure to know what you like, dislike or think when you're reading those chapters!**

**I'm a day late with the update, but I hope that the chapter's length will be a good apology. **

**I hope you enjoyed it :) and yes, I know, I'm mean and annoying because for each step in the good direction, Nori and Amelia make two steps backwards. But well... I swear you won't have to be patient for too long anymore :) I do hope that it was clear in this chapter how much Amelia has changed, and as well how disturbed she is by her feelings. **

**Just to be clear, and because I forgot whether I said it before, I started with the second part of this story: the quest. Also, if ever you see my updates slow down, you can always check my profile. Whenever something changes or happens, I write it in the notes concerning the fic. **

**Next chapter next weekend :)**


	41. The Spy Master

**Everything belongs to JRRTolkien**

**Special thanks to Huntressofhope who's now sort of my Beta :) I hope you'll like the edited version!**

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><p>Being in Danà's arms brought me back memories of my aunt. Sometimes, she too would just hold me tightly against her chest. It always made me feel so perfectly protected. Danà was maybe just a bit shorter than my aunt had been. But her hug was just as comforting. I had my eyes closed while she kept on caressing my hair. She kept murmuring kind words in my ear too.<p>

I had no idea how much time had passed. I didn't really care. I didn't want Danà to push me away, I needed the contact right then.

Still, at some point, I felt her shift slightly before she placed her hands on my shoulders and kindly pushed me away a bit. She sighed and softly cupped my cheek with her hand. I saw her gaze move over the cut there before our eyes met.

"You belong here Amelia." She said most seriously and I thought she would stop there, but clearly she had more to say. "You shouldn't fear talking with Nori. He's a good dwarf."

"I know that." I blurted out before blinking several times rapidly. "Wait. Who said I was afraid?"

"It's written all over your face."

Danà's kind smile put me at ease and I sighed. I took a step back and looked around us. I wasn't comfortable talking about Nori, and especially not in here where anyone could walk in on us and hear our words. Biting my lower lip in worry, I weighed my options. I could either talk or keep doing what I had done until then. It wasn't difficult to see that the results so far hadn't been really good. Clearly working on this problem on my own wasn't a good solution.

Then I suddenly remembered Balin's words when I had first gone to him to talk about Nori. 'You should talk to Danà or Dís.' At the time I had completely discarded this comment, I had too many other things to think about. But now I couldn't help but wonder why he had told me this. Why would he advise me to talk with Danà? What did he think I had wanted to talk about? Could he maybe…suspect something? Was I obvious?

I hoped not.

Nervously glancing up at the older woman, I swallowed the lump in my throat and spoke in a small voice.

"I don't know what I should do. I think I might…"

My voice refused to work right then. I just couldn't get the words out. Saying them aloud would give them power and the little voice in my head was powerful enough. I shifted awkwardly on my feet and, hadn't I had to carry my dirty clothes, I would be wringing my fingers anxiously right then.

"Oh, I know you actually do." Danà cryptically said, forcing me to look back at her once again. "Actually, I'm not the only one who knows that."

I gasped at her words, suddenly growing more nervous.

"Wh…what do you mean?" I stammered, looking away, suddenly worried someone, anyone, would pop out of nowhere and hear us.

"Amelia. You can't ignore it for much longer can you?" She softly whispered, caressing my cheek kindly.

"But what should I do?" My voice was barely above a murmur.

Hadn't Danà been a dwarf, she probably wouldn't have heard a word I said. She heard though, and her answer wasn't at all what I was expecting, or even hoping for.

"I can't tell you that Amelia. It's your choice to make. You're an adult. Take whatever decision feels right."

"But what if I end up making a mess of all this." I sounded like a small child right then, lost and afraid.

"It is your decision." Danà was oddly calm compared to me. "You can decide to take a risk, or you can decide not to. That's about it."

"It's not that simple." I whispered.

"Actually it is."

We stood in front of her home's door and she only smiled once before she pushed it open and I followed her. This discussion hadn't helped me much. Still, I couldn't help but feel slightly glad that Danà hadn't given me any advises. It might sound completely stupid, but I'd rather take such important decisions on my own. She was entirely right though. I couldn't stay a coward for much longer. I had to take a decision. I didn't have any other choice, I saw that clearly now. It didn't help with the doubts and fears I felt at the whole situation, but there was no way I could change that right now.

I had to take a decision.

I had to speak with Nori…probably.

I forced all sad thoughts out of my mind as soon as I stepped inside Gloin's and Danà's home. Their house was quite similar to ours, but maybe a bit larger. The living room was similar to ours, but instead of bookshelves, I could see racks holding axes and other weapons. Clearly this house belonged to a warrior. The furniture was almost identical to ours, wooden chairs and wool carpets, some cushion here and there; all in all there was nothing fancy here. I wondered whether this was the norm in the Halls. I frowned for a second. It suddenly struck me as slightly odd. I had never questioned the hierarchy here. There was the King and his sister. They were obviously at the top. But then, in my mind, I would say that Balin had an important role too, maybe as a counsellor. Gloin and Dori were equally important too. Their statuses were clearly superior to those of others. Yet now that I actually thought about it, there was absolutely nothing grand or precious around here. The chairs and tables were quite basic, just like every other piece of furniture in their homes.

Was it normal? I then recalled several discussions about the problems dwarves were having with money. I had never paid much attention to it, but clearly the mines weren't producing anything really precious. The smiths could only work on weapons or furniture and kitchenware. There were maybe a couple of jewellers and they hadn't much to work with.

The situation in the Halls was maybe not as good as what I might have felt it was. I clearly would have to pay more attention to that in the future.

I was torn away from those thoughts when Danà patted my shoulder and grabbed my dirty laundry to take it away, probably to their kitchen where she would let it soak in cold water.

Gimli was nearby, grumpily holding a tray with tankards on it. The young dwarf apparently didn't like being the waiter here. Next to him, Fili was teasing him about this before he grabbed one of the tankards. It surprised me a bit to see Fili here and soon after I realized that Dís, the King and Balin were here too. They all sat near the raging fire and Gloin soon joined them. Looking around, I realized that I couldn't see Kili anywhere though. It was rather odd as Fili and Gimli were both there and the three of them tended to spend most of their time together.

I didn't stay alone near the entrance for long. As soon as she spotted me, Dís quickly stood up and walked right to me. Wordlessly, she grabbed my chin and looked more closely at my cheek.

"Did you clean it properly?" She asked with narrow eyes.

"Of course." I scoffed. "I don't really wish to die of an infection."

She nodded before smirking slightly and squeezing me in a tight hug.

"Fili told me what happened. He was rather vague, always is actually when he thinks it'll worry me."

I smiled softly and shook my head.

"Fili was amazing. Really. He's strong." I wasn't lying, far from it.

"You're not too bad Amelia." The blond dwarf teased loudly before turning to the others. "You should have seen her during that first fight. In the night, with only her staff and then her daggers, she managed to…"

I blushed terribly as he started to recall the events and cut in.

"I managed to survive long enough for someone to come and help me." I said with finality, pointedly looking at the blond dwarf, who immediately closed his mouth.

Gloin and Balin congratulated me then, saying that it was exactly what training me was all about. As they spoke and I smiled to them, my mind was elsewhere. I couldn't stop thinking about Danà's words earlier.

Thoughts about Nori, family, and belonging kept whirling around in my mind. It was hard to stay focused on what was going on around me when there was such turmoil inside.

I was thankfully brought out of my thoughts by Fili's arm heavily falling on my shoulders. I startled slightly and looked at him. His eyes were crinkling as he smiled hugely and dimples appeared on his cheeks. Quickly he guided me closer to the hearth, where the others were.

"See uncle, I told you that the three of us would be perfectly fine." He calmly stated, though his smile betrayed his pride at our achievements.

"You aren't exactly fine though." The King said calmly, observing both me and Fili attentively.

"We didn't do so bad, considering it was only the three of us." I replied evenly.

At that moment I didn't know really how I was feeling. Somehow I was tired. Really tired. Talking with Danà had both relieved and exhausted me. My mind was a mess of thoughts and most of them were about one dwarf. Always that one dwarf.

"You should have seen Nori too." Fili then exclaimed joyously. "He was just amazing."

My lips pulled into a smile against my will at the simple mention of his name. It was true. Nori had been amazing, he was amazing. When my gaze fell on the other dwarves though, I could see that they didn't really know how to react to this statement. Dís and Danà kept silent, as they usually did. Balin was frowning, probably deep in thought and the others were frowning too. Fili clearly felt the change in the mood and he glanced at me uncertainly.

"He really was." I affirmed softly, smiling at Fili.

The young dwarf lightly squeezed my shoulder, hugging me slightly closer to him for a second. I glanced at him before the King's caught my attention again.

"Even if reclaiming his family's beads is an honourable quest, I don't see how a thief's way could be amazing, as you put it." The King didn't even look at us as he spoke rather grimly.

An odd thought I could remember having awhile ago, crossed my mind once more. I was too tired to think it through though and spoke without even asking myself whether it was wise or not.

"The warrior's way might be honourable, but sometimes it might only lead you to death faster."

There was an eerie silence that fell heavily in the room after I spoke those words. Of course it had been stupid of me to say that. I was in a room full of warriors. Dwarves were very serious about honour and pride and I had somehow just said they were rather stupid. Glimpsing around, I saw that Gloin and the King above all others weren't happy with my words. Even Gimli was pouting unhappily. The King was just about to speak when his sister interrupted him.

"Wait, brother." She raised her hand before looking at me. "Amelia, what do you mean?" Her eyes and expression were similar to her brother's but she clearly trusted me enough to know I hadn't meant any offense.

"I just think that sometimes, it might be safer and quicker to use other ways." As they all looked at me I swallowed and tried my best to gather my wits. "I…well, remember when I went to Gorm the first time?" It was a rhetorical question, of course they remembered. "Well, when I poisoned those people, it wasn't honourable. It was…sneaky…it wasn't the way a warrior would have done it. But it worked."

I could see they were all really attentive to my words now. I felt nervous when I realized that they were actually listening to me so seriously.

"And…and the second time. It was the same, Kili and I couldn't just barge in and fight."

Fili seemed to agree with me as he nodded pensively while he crossed his arms over his chest.

"And once more this time. We were outnumbered. We couldn't possibly fight against all the men. So we used other means to win, sneaky means, thieves' means you could say."

The King was looking at me intently, his fingers slightly brushing his upper lip as he frowned. Balin and Gloin were frowning too, but it was easy to see that Gloin wasn't actually really going to agree with me. It didn't surprise me. He was a warrior to the core. Balin though, seemed to have the same pensive look that Fili had. What disturbed me most was the way Danà was looking at me with a small smirk. Dís, who was sitting next to her, was showing a completely blank face, her gaze travelling from me to her brother repeatedly.

"I guess…I'm just…" I stammered before taking a deep breath. "I guess I just want to say that certain specific situations require specific actions and that the honest and predictable way a warrior might act isn't necessarily the best way to approach such situations."

The King narrowed his eyes at me while I stopped. I had no way of guessing what was going on through his head at the moment. I could only hope I wasn't currently offending him to the point where I would be kicked out, banished from the Halls. I nervously glanced around once more, trying to discern on my friends' faces who might help me out and who wouldn't understand me. No one spoke for awhile until the King gestured at me. I looked back at him immediately, awaiting his words.

"Go on." He simply said, his eyes riveted on mine.

I swallowed once more as I looked into those icy blue eyes. My brain was working faster than ever and I blurted out the first thoughts that passed through my mind.

"If you'd let him, Nori could be much more useful to you than you seem to believe he can."

"How so?"

"Look at the present situation. If you trusted him, and his abilities, I'm quite sure that Nori would have been able to tell you ages ago who the thieves attacking us were, and where they were hiding. The fact that he's such a good thief should be considered an asset. He could help you. He could find information for you, he could tell you whether you had enemies or not and where they are. He could help you find strategies or give you information on people you wish to negotiate with. Having a spy that you can fully trust could only be an asset, nothing else."

I inhaled deeply after my rant as I was slightly short of breath. My eyes were wide as I looked at the King. His face didn't show anything about what he was thinking. Still, he nodded slightly and repeated lowly, as if to test the word as it rolled off his tongue.

"A spy."

Our discussion was interrupted though as there was a loud knock on the door and shortly after Dori and Ori burst in. As soon as they saw me, they rushed to my side and I was crushed into their embrace.

It felt bittersweet to be held by the two of them.

I was happy to see them again, overjoyed to see their joyous faces. But it hurt a bit to remember I had somehow avoided them since I came back. Even if it had been only for a few short hours, I still felt guilty about it. Dori and Ori were just too important for me. I had been stupid to react like that to Nori's words. I knew that. It had only been that though, a reaction. As I squeezed Dori in my arms, I could only be glad that he and Ori weren't angry at me. I had been worried. But the moment I had truly dreaded only happened a short minute after, as Dori finally let me go, my eyes met with the grey ones I hadn't dared look into earlier.

Nori's face was blank as he looked at me.

His eyes though were different.

I felt like screaming and crying aloud when I saw them. He looked so hurt, so damn hurt as he stared at me and I couldn't help but wince slightly. Thankfully no one was observing me. All eyes were on Nori who finally stepped through the door and into the light. Immediately he gazed around and was about to go in one of the room's corners when the King halted him. Meanwhile, Dori was hugging Fili fiercely and the young prince was laughing loudly. It should have been a cheery moment, but I felt only sad and tired. Right then I just wanted to disappear in a hole and sleep...just sleep without waking up. But I felt compelled to listen as I heard the King's voice.

"Nori" He said, forcing everyone into silence. "I am truly glad you found those beads back."

Nori didn't answer. He simply inclined his head in a nod, acknowledging the words.

"How did you find out this man had the beads?"

That was a completely logical question and Nori shrugged before he answered, seemingly carelessly though I knew he was on edge.

"I asked."

I could have laughed at his answer if my feelings weren't all over the place. I could tell the others were slightly put out, but thankfully, Danà decided that we should celebrate this good news instead of talking, and soon enough ale was being poured in large tankards to make every dwarf around happily drunk.

Even though the mood was rather light, I couldn't help but feel slightly depressed. I was lurking around in the shadows, staying at a distance from the others. I simply didn't feel like talking to anyone. My thoughts were running in circles in my head and I just couldn't stop thinking about what I had said. I knew my earlier words had deeply hurt Nori. That much was obvious. To be honest, they hurt me too. They hurt because, even though it had been very poorly phrased...well, not phrased at all... they had been sincere. Knowing that Nori saw me as family was both heartening and devastating. I was pretty sure that when he said family, he meant it in the way of blood relatives. I felt honoured and happy that he would love me that much at least. But my stupid, resilient crush just couldn't accept that. It was breaking my heart, tearing it in small pieces, to think that Nori would never love me the way I might love him.

I shook my head slightly, fighting against the tears that menaced to pool in my eyes. I glanced around and saw the three brothers. Ori's smile was simply huge while he spoke with Fili. And seeing pride and utter joy shining in Dori's eyes was something I would love to see more often. My heart clenched again. I could only hope Nori hadn't told those bloody words to Ori and Dori. I bit my lower lip, cursing my own stupidity. Seeing as the two other brothers seemed to have no troubles in the world, I guessed Nori had held his tongue.

I hadn't meant to be hurtful. I lowered my gaze again, looking pitifully at the stone floor.

The words had come out unwillingly. I hadn't really been the one to pronounce them. Though, I had to admit that it was the main topic tormenting me recently. I saw Dori and Ori like brothers, like family. But I loved Nori in a different way. It wasn't planned, it wasn't logical, it just was.

There was nothing I could do against it, but even though there logically weren't any blood ties between us, it disturbed me a bit. I couldn't see him as a brother. I didn't want him to see me as a sister. Matters concerning blood weren't relevant. Not to me. Not then at least. The simple possibility that he would see me as a sister was unbearable. My thoughts were rather messy right then, but there wasn't much I could do about it.

I looked around again and could see that Nori was smiling mischievously while Fili explained once again how impressive Nori had been. Even the King seemed a bit interested.

I turned away from them though. I was tired.

No.

Actually I wasn't tired. I was exhausted. I couldn't stand here anymore. I had to leave. I wanted to sleep...just fall into darkness and forget everything.

Sighing I sat on a chair and forlornly drowned in my depressing thoughts.

When Dori came to talk to me I was sitting on a large chair by the fire. He sat by me and we remained silent for awhile. I knew he wanted to talk but apparently wasn't sure what to say exactly. Slowly he patted my hand before he caught it in his much larger and stronger one. He squeezed it lightly and cleared his throat.

"There's no word to tell you how thankful I am." His gruff voice forced me to look at him.

His head was low and he was staring at the ground. Even though I couldn't see him clearly, I saw that his eyes were gleaming with unshed tears. Slowly I turned my hand so that I could squeeze his back.

"I didn't do anything Dori. It was Nori." I was surprised to hear my voice being so steady.

"It was his secret all along."

I didn't need to answer that. It was pretty obvious and Nori might have told them already.

"I should have known. I should have been with him, helping him..." Dori softly started to murmur before I interrupted him.

"You helped him in other ways."

Dori looked at me then. I was slightly taken aback; it was odd after all to see this strong dwarf look uncertain and almost scared. Dori clearly was deeply moved by the events of that day and felt like he had let his own brother down.

"Nori wouldn't have had it any other way. And you helped him by keeping Ori safe. He didn't have to worry for you and could stay focused, stay safe." I calmly said. "You helped him Dori."

Dori nodded, though he probably wasn't entirely convinced.

I was about to add something when the King's voice caught my attention.

"I can't grant you a pardon now, but if you prove yourself to me, I will."

Immediately after, silence fell in the room. All eyes were on the King and Nori who stood nearby. Nori's arms were crossed and he was looking terribly serious with his slight pout and his furrowed brows.

"One day may come when I'll call for your help..." The King started in a gruff voice.

"And you know I'll answer your call, like anyone would for his kin." Nori cut in.

The King only nodded, though his piercing blue eyes seemed to scan Nori's face for any signs of lies. I could tell that Nori was serious. He wouldn't lie about this. I knew he would honour any vow taken or unspoken. He wouldn't let his King down.

After that there was a short lull in the party and as the dwarves were just starting to be noisy again, I stood up, intent on leaving. There was no point in staying if I was sitting in a chair alone. I might as well just go hide in my room and sleep. I made my way slowly towards the door when a heavy hand on my shoulder halted me. I looked over my shoulder to meet the piercing blue eyes that I both respected and slightly dreaded.

"Come." He ordered. "I want to talk with you."

After those words, he gestured towards the door and the both of us exited the room in silence. I didn't know what to think of this or how to feel about it. Until now, it felt as if my interactions with the King had mostly been involuntary. I couldn't remember another time when we had been alone together, except maybe that one time when I was injured. Maybe I was forgetting something, but right now it seemed a bit odd to be alone with him. I could only wait to find out what he wanted with me. We walked for awhile through the dark corridors before he finally decided to talk.

"You knew about the beads."

Once again, it wasn't a question, but I answered nonetheless.

"I did."

"Why didn't you tell me, or Dori, or anyone else?" He asked sternly. "It would have saved Nori some troubles."

I frowned a bit and looked at my feet.

"It wasn't my secret to tell." I replied before adding softly. "And I'm not sure it would have changed anything."

I bit my lip. I hadn't meant for my words to sound offensive or accusing. But in the end they did. It wasn't that I thought that the King was unfair, but I believed that even if he had known about the beads, he still would have punished Nori. The King just wasn't one for such underhanded tactics. He probably fought his battles head on. He wasn't the kind to hide in the shadows to spy on his enemies.

No. I couldn't see him condone Nori's actions, even though he had a good reason.

"You're loyal and honest. I like these qualities."

I almost stumbled when I heard him speak those words. It felt a bit surreal. It proved yet again that I couldn't guess what this dwarf was thinking. I would have thought he was angry at me for keeping the secret. But in the end he was...praising me. It was odd. Well, it was even a bit scary.

"What are you going to do now?" I was surprised to find myself brave enough to ask him that.

He took some time before he answered. I saw him glimpse at me from the corner of his eye too, as if to gauge my reactions.

"I might think a bit about your idea."

I was properly shocked by that piece of news and stopped in the middle of the corridor. The King took a few more steps before he stopped too and turned to face me.

"You will really think about it?" I enquired, genuinely surprised.

"Certain circumstances might ensure I need certain ... skills in the future." He frowned before locking his gaze with mine. "Nori will have to work to gain his pardon."

"More than for his pardon, I'm sure he'll work for you, for his kin." I said calmly, still a bit surprised.

"I'm sure he will." The King agreed with a nod. "I will probably have to send him away for awhile though." He muttered this last part to himself probably, as he wasn't looking at me anymore.

My heart clenched painfully when I heard him speak, but I didn't let anything show on my face. This was good news. The King would employ Nori. It really was great. I shouldn't feel sad or pained or scared. Nori was an adult and a very strong dwarf. He didn't need me to worry over him, especially not in such a situation, and especially not after tonight. Suddenly I was fairly certain that he wouldn't want to have anything to do with me after what I had said. This thought truly didn't help my already sinking mood.

"What will you do?"

The King's question startled me a bit. I had been so caught in my own thoughts that I hadn't paid that much attention to him at all.

"What do you mean?" I replied with a frown.

"Do you still wish to go with the caravans?" He explained his thoughts and I took a second to think about my answer.

"I...I don't know."

Honestly, I still wanted to go out of the Halls. I still wanted to have a look at this world. And I still couldn't think of spending my life behind walls forever. Nothing had changed concerning these feelings. But on the other hand I was rather tired of all the harshness that came with leaving the safety of the Halls. Even though I had been safe several times when I went out, it was still tiring to sleep on the hard ground. The journey to Archet had been even worse with all the water that poured on us endlessly. Even if I was glad I had followed Nori and Fili, I couldn't help but be hesitant to go out once again. Or at least in the near future.

Suddenly I found myself missing the quiet time spent with Oin in the wards.

Maybe it was time for me to go back there.

I was a healer after all.

The King had been silent while I pondered on my answer, but I knew he was listening to me when I decided to talk.

"I think I should go back to the wards. I would like to still train, and I still would like to follow caravans. But if I do go on trade's journeys, I'd like it to be useful." My voice was calm and about this at least, my thoughts were quite clear. "There's no point in me trailing behind a caravan if I can't use my skills."

The King nodded and replied softly.

"If you agree to it, we'll let the towns and communities around know that we have a good healer here. You are of course allowed to train with the others."

I nodded too. I didn't have much else to say and we both remained silent for awhile until the King stopped and made me realize we were in front of a door I knew well now.

"I'll let the brothers know you're back here."

After these words, the King nodded sharply and swiftly turned back to the direction we had come from. I looked at his retreating form for awhile, wondering whether the few words we exchanged were really that important that he needed to talk to me this very evening. Nothing had seemed of particular importance to me though.

I shrugged.

Trying to understand this dwarf would be a waste of time and energy. I couldn't do it. Sighing deeply I pushed the door and smiled softly at the sight of the room.

I was home.

I let my eyes wander on the furniture and the walls.

This truly was a place dear to my heart now. I walked in slowly, lightly touching the top of my chair. It was odd that I thought of it as my chair. Still, it was. Just next to it was Ori's, facing me was Nori's and completing the small square in front of the hearth was Dori's. This was where we were a family and I felt my eyes burn slightly at how I had denied this earlier.

I couldn't help but feel afraid to lose it somehow, to lose this place. In my mind, if Nori found out about my feelings and felt too embarrassed by them, then I might have to leave. The simple thought of Nori pushing me away was already rather painful, but if it was added to the possibility of being kicked out of here...maybe it explained why I was so reluctant to talk to Nori. Besides, I had to think about Dori and Ori too. Who was to say they would agree? Maybe there were customs I didn't know about these kinds of things. What if I wasn't suitable for Nori? What if I couldn't let my feelings known for a reason or another? In this world, from what I could tell, certain things were just not talked about. What if I confessed and it was perceived as a terrible thing to do? What if it made the dwarves think less of me?

There were so many things I should think about.

I couldn't just go to Nori and tell him everything. I had so many other details to consider. And I wasn't certain I would ever find it in me to be bold enough to confess.

I cringed as I realized I sounded like a lovesick teenage girl who was dealing, poorly, with her first crush.

All the while I had walked back to my room and was already lying in my bed. Soon enough, I drifted off to sleep, thinking that the next day I would have to talk to Nori, if only to explain my earlier words.

The following morning, when I woke up and went to have breakfast with the others, I met two very giddy brothers. Dori was so happy about the beads that he had even baked different types of breads and cakes. The kitchen suddenly looked and smelled like a bakery and I loved it. Ori's smile was the widest I had ever seen. It made him seems quite younger and I couldn't help but smile widely too. Then, the two of them almost suffocated me in their arms.

I could see tears gathered at the corners of Ori's eyes too.

"Thank you Amelia." The youngest brother whispered in a choked voice.

He squeezed me tightly and it made me chuckle a bit for a second. I hugged him back, feeling happy just because he was too.

"Stop it. I didn't do anything. It was all Nori's work." I replied while patting his back.

"You knew about it all." Dori said with a knowing tone, shaking his head slightly.

I had told him that the previous night, but I guessed that it meant a lot that I had, somehow, ended up being the only one knowing about this.

"I did. I'm sorry, but I couldn't tell you. It was Nori's secret, not mine." I looked at the oldest brother, and smiled at him.

I was relieved to see that he wasn't angry at all. He was looking at me oddly though, as if he was trying to solve some sort of puzzle or mystery and it did unnerve me a bit. I couldn't ask him why he was behaving like this because Ori forced me to sit and eat with him. At the first bite of one of Dori's amazing homemade breads I forgot it all and concentrated on the food.

Maybe the dwarves were starting to influence my behaviour a bit too much.

As I thought about that, I absentmindedly listened to Ori and Dori. The two brothers obviously continued their discussion as if I hadn't interrupted them with my arrival.

"And when is he coming back?" Ori asked while cutting yet another piece of bread from the big loaf freshly baked by Dori.

"I don't know. I was surprised when he told me about this new mission." Dori shrugged as he sat facing me and grabbed some honey cakes.

"Thorin could have waited." Ori grumbled, clearly unhappy with our King. "He barely had the time to rest at all." His mood was reflected in the way he meticulously tore his piece of bread into small crumbs without eating it.

This made me frown. Ori wouldn't do that unless he really was bothered by something. I kept silently eating my breakfast, but now I was concentrating on their discussion too. What was going on?

"Apparently there were items that couldn't be left there, in their hands." Dori clearly wasn't too happy either, but he was obviously trying to act rationally. "And anyway, we need to be certain the menace is completely gone."

"I know." Ori pouted. "I just wished we had more time to see each others."

"He'll be back soon." Dori's kind voice tried to appease his younger brother.

I choked and coughed loudly when I finally understood what they were talking about. Immediately Ori handed me a tankard of ale and I accepted it gladly for once. I drank a bit messily but didn't care, this was a dwarvish home after all. After swallowing a large amount of the bitter liquid, I inhaled deeply and looked up at Dori quickly.

"Nori left already?" I asked with a hoarse voice. "But we just came back!"

"See!" Ori exclaimed immediately. "Even Amelia thinks it was too soon to leave."

Dori sighed loudly and pinched the bridge of his nose. Ori and I exchanged a glance. Clearly we were both annoyed by Nori's sudden departure, though it probably wasn't for the exact same reasons.

"Ori…" He groaned before looking at me. "Yes, Nori left. Thorin asked him to go back to Archet. They agreed that it was the right time to try and definitely get rid of that problem."

I nodded. It was probably the best course of action, but Nori's departure was leaving me with conflicting emotions. I wasn't sure whether I was relieved to avoid the confrontation or sad that I wouldn't see him for awhile.

Actually it only took me a few seconds to decide that I was sad and worried. I tried not to let it show too much though. I buried my face in the plate of food in front of me and didn't say another word. Maybe I could use this time to put some order in my feelings and thoughts. Maybe I could take a decision while Nori was away. This way, when he would be back, I would not waste too much time hesitating dumbly. I would be able to talk to him. This future discussion already filled me with dread but I knew it was inevitable. A feeling of guilt started to wake in me but I crushed it down. Nori's quick departure probably had nothing to do with me, with the terrible words I had pronounced. I really hoped they didn't, because otherwise it would just highlight that I was right. It would show that I couldn't say anything or I would otherwise risk losing everything.

The rest of that morning was spent cleaning and repairing my clothes. I quickly went to grab them at Danà and Gloin's place. Only Gimli was here and I ended up having to drink some ale with him while I recalled our journey. It made me smile to see him like this. Even though he was trying hard to behave like an adult, Gimli was still pretty much like a teenager and he loved to hear tales of battles. I didn't mind it much. It was nice to speak with him but at some point I just had to leave. I had quite some work to do on my clothes after all.

That was yet another thing I had learned since my arrival in this world. Here, there was no supermarket where one could find large quantities of clothes at almost any time. Of course I could have bought another tunic to replace the one cut in several places. But this would cost too much compared to the little money we earned. I, for one, hadn't earned much these past months. My participation in several missions had helped me at first, but after I had been hurt, I had spent all my time worrying about my training and hadn't earned any money at all.

I didn't want to ask Dori or Ori for a new tunic. I knew that, even though the both of them had a somewhat steady inflow of money, they weren't rich. Most of their savings was spent in food and then the priority went to pieces of equipments that couldn't just be repaired easily. A simple cut on a tunic could be stitched back, a broken blade was another matter. It could be repaired, but the work might weaken the blade. Luckily I knew how to sew basic stuff.

I worked wordlessly on my tunic, smiling and nodding at the few women I knew who passed by me. Thankfully it didn't take me long to work on my clothes.

After I came back from the large baths, I was happily surprised to see that Bombur, Bifur and Bofur where here to have lunch with us.

"Amelia!" Bofur exclaimed when he saw me.

He didn't have the time to say or do anything as Bifur surprised everyone by pushing him away and hugging me fiercely. The slightly odd dwarf let out a string of Khuzdul that I couldn't understand, but I didn't care much. I was a bit shocked but really happy with his welcome.

"He said he was proud of you." Bofur translated with a kind smile.

"Thanks Bifur." I told the old dwarf. "But really, I didn't do much."

His finger was pointed at my face when he next talked and I glanced at the others, waiting for one of them to translate.

"He said you should be proud of your battle wound." Bombur said while he stood next to the stove.

"I'd rather she didn't have it." Dori grumbled, suddenly frowning.

I blushed a bit and felt somewhat self conscious at that. I knew it was stupid and that Dori was most likely not commenting on the aspect of the wound that would probably leave a scar. Still, I couldn't help but think that this wouldn't help me in the future. I had no beard and a scar on the face, surely no dwarf would like me. As I thought that, I had to admit I didn't care much about the dwarves in general. Only one of them seemed to matter and his brother didn't like the scar.

I was forced out of those forlorn thoughts as Bifur huffed and Bofur retorted loudly.

"Nonsense." Bofur was surprisingly frowning. "It proves that Amelia is strong and deserves her beads. You should be proud Dori."

"I'd rather she didn't need to fight!" Dori replied. "Surely you won't tell me you like to see her hurt."

Bofur frowned some more when he heard this. It was a strange sight somehow. I was used to see him cheeky or happy. I rarely saw him offended or annoyed, which he clearly was a bit right now.

"Oy, don't put words in my mouth."

There was a short, awkward silence before Bombur decided to speak.

"Well, Amelia, while these idiots are busy sprouting nonsense, why don't you come and sit. Tell me a bit about this trip. How was it?" The kind and level tone he used clearly let the other know he didn't care much about their small disagreement.

I smiled at the round dwarf and quickly related to him the highlights of our little mission. As I talked, I was glad to see that Dori and Bofur had calmed down. It had been a bit odd to see Bofur and Dori almost snapping at each other, and I couldn't help but think that maybe there was something else that was annoying them. It didn't make sense for them to be angry over such a little thing.

Fortunately lunch was peaceful and the roasted meat prepared by Bombur was perfectly juicy and tender. It was delicious. Soon though both Bifur, Bofur and Dori left, leaving me, Ori and Bombur to clean everything.

"It's fine Bombur, I'll take care of it." I said, placing a hand on his shoulder to stop him from standing. "You cooked, it's only natural you don't clean the dishes."

"I don't mind." He replied with a shrug though he didn't move to stand. "So, now that the older brothers are outside, can you tell us how you're really doing?"

I looked up and glanced at Ori. The kind dwarf was looking at me rather sternly, as was Bombur actually. It surprised me a bit.

"I…what? I'm perfectly fine." I blurted out.

Ori and Bombur exchanged a glance. The two dwarves seemed to talk silently with each other. I remained silent until Ori looked back at me. His eyes narrowed slightly and right now he looked nothing like he usually did. It was easy to see that he was older than he seemed. I tended to forget his age, but right now I remembered it perfectly. I suddenly felt like a child.

"Amelia, what's going on? What happened? You looked really sad yesterday. Dori might have not realized but I doubt it." Ori was gathering the dishes as he spoke very calmly. "I believe he spoke with Nori about it, but I'm not sure."

Hearing this made me blush and I quickly turned away.

"Is it because of the man you killed?" Bombur asked softly.

He truly was a kind dwarf. But what I liked most about him, beside this genuine kindness, was that he was also honest and to the point. He didn't beat around the bush. Even if I had been upset about this man I had killed, I wouldn't have been offended by his question because the tone of his voice was just too kind and caring.

I shook my head slightly to answer.

"No. It honestly doesn't matter much. I'm just tired, I guess." The last part was obviously a lie, but I didn't feel comfortable enough to speak with them about Nori.

They both looked at me suspiciously before Bombur once more spoke.

"If something was bothering you, do you know someone you'd be comfortable talking with?"

Clearly I didn't lie well enough for Bombur. I thought about Danà and I nodded.

"Yes. I already talked with Danà."

"Good." Bombur smiled kindly while Ori pouted a bit.

"I trust you both, you know that right?" I couldn't help but add and I was glad to see Ori smile at me.

After a few minutes spent washing and drying plates, I finally broke the silence. Bombur was still drinking ale while Ori was busy putting everything back in place after I cleaned it.

"So, did anything happen here while I was away?"

"Mahal! It's true you don't know." Ori exclaimed giddily.

"Know what?" I turned to face them, surprised by Ori's tone.

I glanced at Bombur and saw him blush. That was unusual. I quirked an eyebrow as I observed the colour on his round cheeks. Ori was chuckling lightly and I turned my gaze to him. It warmed my heart to see him behaving like this. It was as if everything was perfect in his life, as if he had no more troubles. Maybe that was the case. I hadn't thought of the effect that Nori's achievement would have on his brothers. Clearly it was positive for Ori. I would have to speak with him about it. Still, knowing that Nori had done all this only for his family's sake clearly would change Ori's opinion of Nori's activities. The youngest brother had been a bit angry when he didn't understand his brother, now I would bet he didn't feel like this anymore.

But my mind came back to the matter at hand. I was curious to know what could make Bombur blush after all.

"So? What's going on?" I repeated.

Bombur loudly cleared his throat before he started to nervously scratch his beard, just under his cheek. He looked up at the ceiling and seemed rather shy about whatever topic we were about to discuss.

"Well…" He started before shyly looking at his hands. "I'm now engaged."

I felt my eyes grow wide as my mouth was agape. Then my brain that had been frozen by the surprise finally decided to work again.

I would probably later be ashamed by my reaction, but I let out a very girlish squeal as I bounced on my feet. I didn't know why I reacted this way, but I was truly happy for Bombur. I bounced slightly and forgot all about the dishes that were still wet behind me. I immediately went to sit in front of Bombur.

"Tell me, tell me!" I squeaked happily. "Who is she? When did you propose? How did you do it?"

Until that very moment, I hadn't known I was so curious about weddings and things related to it. Maybe the fact that it was Bombur's wedding made a difference. My reaction made Ori laugh and Bombur blushed some more. Soon enough though, the three of us were sitting around the table, Ori and Bombur drinking ale while I drank chamomile. Ori had even found some more cakes in the cellar.

"So?" I smiled happily, resisting the urge to bounce on my seat.

"Well, erm, I don't think you know her." Bombur said, smiling shyly as he looked at his tankard. "She works at the market; she sells one of the best ale around. It's made by her family."

A memory of a broken barrel came to my mind but I pushed it away quickly. Bombur obviously refused to look at us. His gaze was riveted to the ale in his tankard. From the small smile on his lips, it was easy to see how truly happy he was. I glanced at Ori and smiled some more. The cheeky smirk on his face was completely unusual but it suited him too. I looked back at Bombur when he cleared his throat again.

"I formally received an answer about a week ago." He looked up then and his shy smile turned into a loving one. "Now we can get engaged and then we'll get married."

It was really sweet to see him like this. Yet I couldn't help it; I frowned a bit at his words. Ori hadn't seemed to react. Still I chose to ask, maybe this was a good opportunity for me to discreetly find out a bit more about dwarvish traditions.

"What do you mean when you say you formally received an answer?"

Ori quirked an eyebrow at me and was the one to explain.

"Don't you ask the question in your world?"

"Of course we do. The tradition is that the man asks the woman whether she wants to marry him. She answers. They get engaged and then they marry."

Both dwarves blinked and quickly I realized that some things probably were different.

"How do you do it here?" I felt a lump start to form in my throat as I asked that question.

"First the dwarf has to court the lady informally. During the court, he usually offers several small trinkets. If the lady accepts them all, then he can ask her whether she agrees to be formally courted." Ori started to explain and I was left flabbergasted.

Neither of them seemed to realize how shocked I was. They continued to explain as if nothing was wrong with this.

"If she accepts, then obviously the dwarf keeps courting her." Bombur continued with a calm and steady voice as his blush and embarrassment had now disappeared. "But starting then, he is allowed to offer her beads and jewels. If the lady is still agreeing after a while, then the dwarf has to ask formally both her, her family and his family too whether they agree on the match."

Ori was peacefully eating a piece of cake and was completely oblivious to my inner turmoil. Their words didn't really make that much sense to me. Bombur was still explaining the whole process while he drank.

"Once the family agrees, both families will meet to discuss the complete agreement. After the agreement is finished, they can get engaged. After that, the dwarf has to prove he is able to provide for her and protect her. He basically has to prove himself. Usually it lasts around five years. And after all that has been proved, they can be married."

I felt as if some heavy lead had fallen on my shoulders and on my heart. Five years? Courting? Agreement?

What the hell was all that?

My stupor was probably quite evident on my face as Bombur and Ori looked at me with surprise. It had taken them quite some time, but finally they realized that something was amiss.

"Amelia?"

I knew I had to react or talk in some ways, but I honestly had no idea what to say. I opened my mouth before I almost immediately closed it again. I had to say something. Ori was starting to stare at me in the oddest way. I blushed and ended up blurting out the first sentence that came to my mind.

"It seems … really complicated."

And I felt at that moment really stupid. Thankfully Ori and Bombur didn't comment on my strange behaviour. I stood back up, purposely ignoring the intrigued glance they exchanged. For a second I had no idea what to do. I remained there, standing next to them. In the end I concentrated on cleaning and tidying the kitchen, which was already quite tidy.

Ori and Bombur didn't stay for long after that but I still kept myself busy. The house had never been as clean and shiny as it was that day.

As I was alone that evening, the information whirled in my mind incessantly.

I felt like crying.

Even if I dared hope that Nori liked me back, how could I possibly go through all those things? It was just impossible. And it seemed to take ages too. If they needed an engagement of five years, then who was to say that courting didn't take years as well? This was yet another wall standing on my way and I was now mostly convinced that this had to be a sign. Yes, a sign that I should just completely forget about all this.

With a forlorn sigh I rolled in my bed. That night, I had trouble finding sleep.

* * *

><p>Days, weeks even, passed before I found myself face to face with the one dwarf that confused me most at the moment. I really hadn't expected to see Nori that day as I entered the kitchen. The afternoon had been long and tiring and it was quite late. I had spent the day in the healing wards and there had been an accident in the mine early in the morning. A few dwarves had been half crushed under a rock and thank Mahal there was no dead. We had been obliged to amputate one of them though and it had been terrifying. I felt nauseous still and could hear the noise of the saw cutting the bones. It still rang in my ears hours after it was all over.<p>

I was exhausted and couldn't wipe the memories away from my mind.

Dís, who hadn't been there to help during the operations, had kindly decided to stay with the injured for the evening and part of the night. I wasn't about to fight her on that as I was content with going back home. I needed a break from the blood and gore. Even though I had known technically and theoretically what to do, it was another matter altogether to do it. Sounds, odours and feeling the resistance in your very muscles and bones was just the kind of memories I could perfectly do without.

In short, one could say that I really wasn't paying attention to my surroundings when I entered the kitchen. I jolted violently when I saw Nori pop out of the corridor's shadow. I gasped and pressed one of my hands against my heart. There was an awkward silence for awhile as we both observed each other. Instinctively my eyes searched for injuries and I was glad to find none, though I could spot several new cuts on his tunic that had obviously been made by sharp weapons.

His beard and hair were impeccably braided. Under his eyebrows I could see his grey eyes observing me intently too. But what disturbed me most was the emotionless façade of his face. I could see the strong emotions he felt in his gaze but they were simply invisible on his features. His mouth was set in a thin line that instantly made me miss his usual grin terribly. His whole demeanour was guarded, as if he waited for me to yell or verbally attack him. He seemed extremely cautious, wary of me.

It hurt terribly.

I had to concentrate to fight back tears that threatened to come to my eyes.

Neither of us moved or made any sound for the longest time.

At some point though, one of us had to break the silence.

"There was an accident in the mines?"

His voice was distant, emotionless too. I barely managed not to cringe when I heard him. I had to clear my throat before I answered in a tiny and weak voice.

"Yes. No one died, but there were a few serious injuries."

I hated that the first thing he had to say to me after several weeks, was about the mines. I hated myself, because I knew it was my own doing. If I hadn't said those words, then we wouldn't be here now, behaving like strangers. I almost didn't see him nod as he started to walk toward the door. I knew he was going to leave without talking with me and I just couldn't let that happen. Quickly I pushed the kitchen door close and stepped in front of it.

"Wait." I said loudly. "Nori, wait. I'm…" I started to pathetically stammer. "I'm sorry. I…"

There was yet another tensed silence until Nori decided to speak.

"Listen, Amelia. I heard you clearly the last time. You don't need to explain." His voice was so cold that I flinched. "I understand that you don't want to be seen as a member of my family, especially with the reputation I have and…"

"That's not it!" I interrupted him sharply.

I was angry that he would think that way, though I had to admit that it might be understandable after my stupid little speech.

"That's not at all what I meant or intended to mean." I was able to speak clearly now, thanks to the anger I felt. "It's not about your reputation or anything like that. It's not about anything you did. It's just…it's not…" Now that I was supposed to explain myself though, the words remained stuck in my throat.

I suddenly felt quite lost. I looked around and tried to find words to describe my feelings. Why was it so complicated?

"What is it Amelia?" He almost groaned. "Why don't you just say what's on your mind?"

I glared at him. He was one to talk. He never said what was on his mind unless I forced him to. Didn't he see how uncomfortable I was? How utterly embarrassed I felt? Couldn't he see that it was far from easy for me to talk?

"Just say it, whatever it is." His voice was once more cold and emotionless.

"I can't Nori...I'm..." I was stammering pathetically, trying my best to convey my thoughts and failing utterly. "It's not about you. Well, no…I mean, yes…I mean…this family is…"

I took a deep breath and closed my eyes, refusing to look at him. Oddly enough, it helped.

"Nori, I'm so glad I was lucky enough to meet you." I said truthfully. "You and your brothers."

"If you're so glad, then why do you refuse to be seen as a member of our family?" He coldly asked and I flinched once again.

His words were like physical blows. It physically hurt me to hear him speak this way, ask those questions.

It wasn't difficult to explain. It shouldn't be difficult. I just had to admit my feelings for him. I just had to tell him that it made me uneasy to be perceived as his family, his sister, because I saw him in a whole other way. I knew obviously that we didn't share the same blood, and that it wouldn't be seen as odd for me to have feelings for one of my adoptive family members. But in my mind I just couldn't accept being perceived as his sister, especially not by him and most certainly not when I felt this way towards him. It was stupid, probably illogical, but well…that was how it was in my head.

I swallowed thickly, looking down at my feet, while I murmured softly.

"You don't understand."

And how could he when I was unable to explain? There was a long silence and I wondered whether Nori heard those words or not at all. I bit my lower lip, I was nervous and weighing the pros and cons of just letting it all out. I wanted to be strong enough, to forget about the consequences.

I wasn't.

He sighed loudly and I felt my heart clench. The next time he spoke he sounded completely different, tired and sad mostly.

"Amelia, listen, I … I don't know what you expect of me. I…" He sighed again. "I don't know what I should do, what you want me to do."

I blinked back tears and looked at him. His eyes were once again shining with unnamed emotions. His brows were furrowed as if he was in pain, and maybe he was. It was hurting me even more to see him like this.

"I don't want you to leave me." I breathed out. "I don't want you to stop talking with me, or to avoid me. I don't like that. I…" It was as if a dam was slowly breaking as the words strangely came out without any effort on my part. "I don't like it when you avoid me. I don't like it."I repeated more strongly. "I lo…like…you."

I turned away and held my breath once those words were finally out. I was suddenly both relieved and scared. I had no ideas what reaction I should expect of him. Quickly I turned away, afraid to see his face and the expression on it. The minutes seemed to stretch for quite a long time until I felt his fingers brush lightly over my shoulder. I managed not to startle when he gently forced me to turn and face him again. I still refused to look at him though.

Slowly he embraced me and I let out a shaky breath before I let my head fall on his shoulder. I lightly and hesitantly placed my hands on his shoulders as he held me loosely.

"I won't leave you." He murmured in my ear. "I won't avoid you anymore. I'm sorry Mizimul."

The tears in my eyes were threatening to fall as I gave a sharp nod.

"I'm sorry too." I whispered.

I knew he was about to ask me why I said that when once again the sound of a door opening forced us away from each others. Silently I escaped to my room. I needed a bit of time for myself.

My heart was beating faster than ever and I was slightly light headed. I was somehow glad for the interruption. I didn't think I would have been able to explain what I was apologizing for. I knew though. I was dependant on him. I needed him. Even after two years I didn't know half of what I should about dwarves and their customs. Even though many things had changed, in some aspects I was still the same lost girl as when I arrived.

I could only hope that Nori didn't mind too much.

After that day, things slowly changed for the better. Nori and I would at least be able to talk more or less normally, but we hadn't been alone together since the day we had both apologized.

Nori unfortunately had to leave again soon after. The King had given him a special mission and he still hadn't finished it. From the way I saw it, Nori basically had to hunt back the thieves and bandits. The stolen items had been scattered around after the bandits just stole what they could and dispersed. Their group didn't stick together after their leader's death, which probably was a good thing as it had considerably weakened them. But it meant that Nori had to find each of them again. It was obviously dangerous and I couldn't stop the fear I felt every time he left. I could only be glad to see that the King was somehow giving him another chance. I couldn't decide whether he was now working as a spy or something else. From what I gathered he was not only bringing back stolen trinkets, but information for the King too about a certain secret matter.

Little by little, things between us went back to normal.

When he was here, he would once more smirk smugly, joke and wink teasingly. He would still hide in the shadows when we were with others and would once more enjoy his ale in the living room with Dori, Ori and me. Life was back to what it was, but it still felt a bit different. Nori didn't try to avoid me anymore, quite the contrary actually, and I couldn't begin to say how glad I was. From time to time he would even bring back something for me.

Once he came back with a new satchel from Lunetown. Another time it was simply some nice pastries from the market, and there were as well some juicy and sweet apples he brought back once too. Those little presents were always kind and thoughtful and it never fell to make me smile.

I thought nothing of it, except that it made me happy.

Life was good.

Everything was almost perfect, even though I hadn't been able to clearly confess my feelings, for now I felt as if it wasn't the most important. I was content with the knowledge that Nori and I were slowly learning to become close friends again.

One night, two months or so after we had come back from Archet, something odd happened. As I was coming back home quite late after having spent half the day with Danà and Dís, I stepped in on a strange scene. I had pushed the entrance door slowly, trying not to make too much noise in case the brothers were already asleep. I immediately noticed that there was still a light shining in the kitchen though, and I frowned as I heard Nori and Dori argue in angry whispers.

"Why are you so set against it?" Nori clearly sounded annoyed, almost offended.

"Do you really have to ask?" Dori snapped back. "Are you really planning on going through with this? I swear Nori, if you hurt…"

"How can you even for one second think that I would hur…" Nori interrupted before Dori cut in too.

"Because I have eyes! I saw it already happened several times! It's a bad idea Nori. It won't work. You can't expect it to work!"

I could tell that Dori was more anxious, almost afraid, than actually angry. It was odd, and I didn't really understand what they were talking about. I wasn't comfortable with listening on their conversation though, so I loudly cleared my throat to let them know I was here. Both of them startled and looked at me with wide, worried eyes.

"Amelia? How…when…when did you arrive?" Dori asked nervously.

"Just now." I replied with a smile. "What's going on?"

"Nothing you should worry about." Dori smiled as Nori glared at him.

"You sure?" I couldn't help but insist.

"Yes. How are Danà and Dís?" This was clearly a random change of topic, but I didn't comment.

"Dís is worried. Kili left almost two months ago." I answered with a frown. "She told me it's the first time that he went out without Fili and she's really nervous about it all."

"It's natural." Dori replied.

"The lad will be fine." Nori added, clearly seeing that I was feeling worried too. "He's not alone. Dwalin left with this caravan too. They went to Dunland, right? It's perfectly normal that it's taking them some time."

"Yes, I know." I sighed. "Dís told me she gave Kili a talisman, for protection. She made him swear to be careful." I added before smiling. "But clearly she doesn't believe he will."

Nori smirked at that.

"Well, he's not known for being careful." He smiled a bit more before adding. "Dwalin will keep him in line though."

I smiled too at the thought of poor, hyperactive Kili being forced to stay calm by a very serious and intimidating Dwalin. It made me forget the discussion that Dori and Nori had been having when I came in.

It probably didn't concern me anyway.

The following day I was back in the wards after an intensive training. The discussion between Dori and Nori was forgotten as soon as I woke up. I had many more things to think about that were more important than an argument between the two brothers.

I waved tiredly at Oin as I came in and took a deep breath. The first time I had stepped back there months ago, after the Archet mission, it had actually felt like I was coming back home. Well, not entirely, but I knew then that I had truly missed it.

There was this light herbal smell that I now realized I loved, and the room was peaceful. I had missed this so much. Even Oin's grumpiness couldn't deter my cheery mood. He had put me to work immediately and I happily obliged, crushing dried leaves to a powder. I didn't need to chat with Oin. The dwarf was partly deaf anyway. I just had to let my hands work on their own while I emptied my mind.

With the passing of weeks and months, this had become somewhat of a routine. Oin now trusted me entirely, even more so after the several operations I had performed. I still couldn't avoid a shudder when I thought of the amputation; I had mostly needed his help for the tasks that required more strength. There had also been several burns or training wounds that I had taken care of since then.

But more than the awful operations that I had to do from time to time, I enjoyed best to take care of the preparations of ointments and infusions.

The small, menial tasks I was performing were perfect for emptying my mind and forget about eventual worries. Hours passed in the wards before I finished the preparations for a few salves and I finally looked up. Oin was working silently next to me.

I couldn't stop the smile that grew on my lips. I liked this, the companionable silence and the implicit trust in my work. Even though I hadn't worked with him in months, Oin still trusted me to do a perfect job and didn't hover over me to check what I did.

I cleaned the table I had used and put everything back in their rightful places. Once everything was tidied I looked through one of the high slits that were allowing some air and light in the room. I didn't know the exact time but I knew it was late afternoon. The fact that I didn't have a watch didn't bother me anymore. I actually found it somehow freeing not having a tool to tell me exactly what time it was. I liked the freedom of thinking in terms of 'early morning', 'lunch time', 'afternoon' and 'late afternoon' among others. It was less stressful than thinking about exactitude and minutes and seconds.

I decided that now was a good time to start preparing some tea.

I concentrated on this new task until I realized that Oin had finished with the infusion he had been preparing and was now waiting for me. He was sitting on his wooden chair, his hands crossed over his belly while he patiently waited for me to serve the tea.

It only took me a few minutes to serve it and sit.

Oin grunted his thanks and blew on his tea. He took a small sip before nodding in approval and it made me smile. He should know by now that I knew how to prepare tea to suit his taste. I held my cup, warming my fingers around it when he decided to speak.

"It's been several months now. How do you feel about being back here?" My mentor asked.

I looked up at him. He was staring at me with a serious frown on the face. I was a bit surprised at first, but the question was simple enough to answer.

"I'm fine. Happy even." I replied while softly blowing on my tea to cool it.

"No more guilt then?" He grunted before sipping the hot beverage.

I quirked an eyebrow then. It was true. Guilt had plagued me for awhile. Now that time had passed, I couldn't understand why I had reacted quite so strongly to various events. Well. That wasn't entirely true. I could understand it, I had felt those things after all and I remembered how messy my thoughts were, but I just didn't feel like that anymore. I had changed. I grew up maybe.

I shook my head slightly, there was no need to dwell on those thoughts. Not anymore.

I smiled a bit sheepishly at Oin who was observing me.

"No more guilt. I promise."

He grunted but didn't add another word.

I smiled and drank my tea peacefully. No. I wouldn't feel guilty for such acts anymore.

* * *

><p>Time passed and around me I could see that something was happening. In the past month the life within the Halls had slightly, but undoubtedly changed. It was a very subtle change too. All of a sudden the King would spend time with my two guardians and my mentor. They would speak in hushed tones, whispering and clearly arguing with one another. Winter was settling in the mountains and Dwalin and Kili finally came back, only for Dwalin to start disappearing with the King and the aforementioned dwarves.<p>

They were clearly planning something, but I had no idea what it was or what it could be.

I had to wait for quite some time before I found out what was going on.

It was in the middle of winter that I stepped in involuntarily with Dís on a meeting the dwarves were having. Dís had wanted to discuss with her brother the possibility of letting me learn Khuzdul and the runes used by dwarves. I had been left alone in the healing wards that day, Oin having disappeared to some meeting, when a young hurt dwarf had came in. He didn't speak common, which was usual with children who usually spent their times with their mothers and siblings. It shouldn't have been a problem, but the child was not from our Halls. His parents were merchants visiting from another settlement. The child was refusing my help and I had no idea what was going on until Dís arrived, the child's parents following her. As they saw me try to treat their kid, they started to yell in Khuzdul and freaked me out completely.

Thankfully Dís managed to calm them down. She asked me to wait in the second room while she took care of the problem. I waited for an hour maybe until she came back to explain what had happened. Apparently, these dwarves believed in some old traditions that only a dwarf would know. The child had been telling me in Khuzdul that I shouldn't use certain plants on him, but I couldn't understand him. This could have created a small diplomatic problem and this merchant had threatened Dís. Our trading agreements with them were important. Just because I couldn't speak Khuzdul, I had almost broken those agreements.

After understanding that the matter was cultural and not medical, I had at first felt a bit lost. Then I had profusely apologized but Dís had been stern. I couldn't wait anymore for her brother to decide whether or not I was trustworthy. He had to allow me to learn Khuzdul. So I followed her as we barged in one of the smaller council rooms.

As she opened the door without knocking, we heard just two words.

"…retake Erebor!" The King exclaimed.

Then many faces turned to face Dís and me.

I could see Dori, Nori and Ori, as well as Dwalin, Balin, Gloin and Oin. To my surprise, because I hadn't known they were involved in all those secretive talks, I saw Bofur, Bombur and Bifur too.

Dís frowned and tugged me in before she slammed the door behind me.

"Have you lost your mind?" She hissed immediately. "Retake Erebor? Brother, have you forgotten Smaug? Is your brain completely fried?" The King glared at her.

"It is our home!" He snarled back at her. "The dragon hasn't been seen in decades. The right time is coming for us to go back home and retake what's ours."

"What's ours? And how do you plan on doing that?" Dís snorted. "Have you forgotten how even the best soldiers of grandfather's guard burnt and died helplessly? Have you forgotten the fire and the screams? The smoke, the pain and the fear?"

Clearly this was a sore topic for the princess and I could only step back and watch as the two royal siblings started to yell at one another. Soon enough, the other dwarves joined in the argument. I wasn't surprised at all, it was in their nature to be loud.

From what I understood nothing was really planned yet. The King wanted to meet with some people before he did anything, but he had received words that a man wanted to see him. Apparently, Nori had been the one to bring words that the dragon hadn't been spotted or heard for awhile. Clearly nothing was certain, but from what I could tell, the dwarves were rather interested in the idea of marching back to their mountain and reclaim it.

I truly didn't have any opinion about it.

Well, I didn't really want to imagine them facing a dragon, but other than that, I truly didn't know enough to have an opinion. I patiently waited, observing them yell at each other. I was standing next to the door and was becoming increasingly bored by all those shouts but there truly was nothing to do.

After quite awhile though, everyone started to calm down and they all left the room little by little. Dori wanted me to follow them, but Dís grabbed my wrist and yanked me to a chair. Wordlessly I sat and waited some more until the room was finally silent again. All the dwarves had left, and there was only the King, Dís, and Balin left in the room. There was a lull in the conversation. Dís and the King were glaring at each other. Then only, Balin decided to clear his throat.

"Amelia, why did you come my dear?" He kindly asked me.

Dís hadn't forgotten about the reason why we came in and the question seemed to remind it to her. She quickly explained the situation we had faced and the King dismissively agreed for me to learn Khuzdul. It was slightly annoying to see such a reaction. If I had known it would be so easy to have his authorization, then I would have asked already. It felt completely anticlimactic.

I quickly left the council room after that, leaving Dís, Balin and the King behind.

I silently walked back to my home and quickly went in my room. I didn't know where the brothers were, but I didn't mind being on my own for once. It was quiet late and I realized that I had spent a good part of the afternoon in this council room, waiting for the King to calm down. Instead of sleeping though, I lit a few candles and decided to write down everything that had happened that day and how happy I currently felt. The notebook Ori had again gifted me was once more almost completely full. It was the second one already. Looking a bit back at previous pages and entries, I realized how much time had truly passed and how much I had truly changed. I looked through the first one too, and I felt a bit lightheaded when I read how much had happened in my life in a bit over a year and a half.

I didn't think I was anything like the person I had once been when I arrived. True I was still rather easily embarrassed and I barely managed not to shame myself in front of those dwarves, but I could see the changes clearly now.

I was stronger, that much was clear. Oh, I still was a weakling when it came to fight or anything similar. But I didn't fear people as much as I once did. I didn't fear myself that much anymore either. I knew I was capable of turning into some sort of vengeful fury if someone I cared for was threatened, and somehow that included quite a large part of Thorin's Halls population. I might not be able to fight physically, but I knew more or less how to defend myself a bit. Well, I knew a bit more than that actually. Trainings were still intense, though now they were a bit more technical too. I was proud of my achievements. I could use my staff rather well and I was much more comfortable with my daggers now. I even managed to use the both at the same time nowadays.

I realized that I had come to care deeply for some of those dwarves too.

Yes. I loved some of them even.

And probably a bit more than that for one of them too…

My crush for Nori hadn't diminished in the past months. Quite the contrary actually.

I jolted when I heard someone knock lightly at my door and I blushed slightly after realizing what I had been thinking about. Closing back the notebook I cleared my throat and called for the person to enter.

I wasn't really that surprised to see Nori come in at that moment.

He seemed nervous, or at least uneasy, which was entirely unnatural for him. He looked as if he had no idea what he was doing here or why he had even decided to come in. I was puzzled to see him behave in such an odd way but decided to stay quiet, waiting for him to talk.

After several silent minutes, he finally shifted on his feet and cleared his throat.

"I made this for you." He mumbled before rummaging through his pocket and handing me something.

Both my eyebrows rose to my hairline at that. Had he really made a gift for me? My heart started to beat a bit more loudly in my chest and I had to struggle with myself to keep my focus on Nori's acts and words. I gingerly took what he held in his hands before looking at it. My heart was starting to almost hurt when I saw his present and I could only smile broadly at the sight of a pretty leather necklace.

Nori had braided together numerous threads of coloured leather and had threaded some beads in it. I would never have been able to make such an intricate design using only threads. It was beautiful. The three beads were carved in wood and engraved with small runes. There were five of them. It was impressive and so, so beautiful. Most of all, it had been made by Nori and it automatically became one of my most precious belongings.

"What does that mean?" I said pointing at the runes after having cleared my throat lightly.

I looked up at him then and he seemed to be completely calm now. It was really strange to witness the changes in his behaviour.

"Now…what would be the fun in telling you?" Nori smirked a bit before winking.

"You…" I tried to think of something witty to say but I just couldn't.

I ended up mock glaring at him while his smirk grew. He looked entirely too smug at this moment, but honestly I didn't care much. I was happier than ever even though I still felt that something was odd with Nori's behaviour.

I didn't ask him to help me put the necklace on, not that I didn't want to, but Nori soon disappeared after he gave it to me. It only made me more curious, it really was strange for him to behave like that. After all we had been through it felt unnatural for him to be so tense when he was with me.

I chose not to ponder on it though. I didn't want to spoil this moment.

Keeping the necklace firmly in my hand I lay on my bed, a small smile on my lips…

…And with thoughts of Nori whirling in my mind…

Unfortunately, this was the last time I saw Nori for quite some time.

The following morning he had already left Thorin's Halls when I woke up. The only thing I knew was that he had been sent outside by the King once more, probably about this business of retaking Erebor. I had been flabbergasted when Dori told me about it. And I was deeply hurt that Nori hadn't said a word. He had to know he was going to leave in the morning. The anger lasted for days, but the longer Nori's absence lasted, the less angry I was. My anxiety though was reaching new highs. I knew that Nori was more than capable of taking care of himself, but that didn't mean I wouldn't worry for his safety.

I was still spending most of my time between the healing wards and the training grounds. I didn't want to stop training altogether, it wouldn't be wise anyway. So I had started to wake up early and trained early with the warriors. I usually spent two to three hours there before I quickly ran back to clean up. Then I was running to the wards.

The wards…I hadn't really realized it before then, but I had missed them so much. I understood now, why Dís had said that I was a healer and that it was a part of me I couldn't change. She had been right. Being a healer, and being thus in the wards, was something I couldn't and wouldn't change.

Between my time spent in the wards and the training grounds, I soon became fairly well acquainted with many dwarves.

All in all, I was now a part of the dwarvish community. Everyone more or less knew someone that I had treated, trained with or even knew me personally. Dwarves were used to see me working with Oin, training with Fili, Kili, Gimli, Gloin and Dwalin or even talking with Bofur and Bifur in the market. None of them seemed shocked when I slowly started to learn Khuzdul. It clearly felt natural for everyone that I did.

In the market, some old ladies would smile kindly at me when I tried to remember and pronounce the names of products in front of me. In the training grounds, I now had to name the weapons that dwarves would point at me. Fili and Kili enjoyed this new game a lot. And in the wards, I had to learn back everything I already had about plants, but this time in Khuzdul. The dwarves thought it was completely natural for me to learn all this and more than once, they would help me. Some of them even enjoyed to tease me, speaking only in Khuzdul to force me to learn faster.

It didn't work.

Khuzdul was probably the most difficult language to learn I had ever heard. I was certain Chinese would have been easier. Especially the guttural pronunciation was hard to articulate. But I did my best anyway.

Meanwhile winter had settled completely in the mountain, before the ice and snow melted once more.

Time was passing without me actually realizing it and spring would soon be there.

Nori spent most of his time outside the Halls, tracking the bandits that had run away and stealing back the dwarvish trinkets that had been taken from graves or dead bodies. The King appreciated that, though the poor dwarf probably had many other things to think about.

His sister, for one, was pestering him. Dís was clearly disagreeing with the King about this whole reclaiming Erebor business. Even worse was the fact that, once they had found out about the fight and its reasons, Fili, Kili and Gimli had been set on following their elders. I had to agree with Danà and Dís though, it seemed like a mad quest and I personally wasn't too happy with the brothers for thinking of going. And I wasn't shy to let them know.

I wasn't too nervous though, because the three of them soon started to reassure me that nothing was certain yet and that they probably wouldn't leave. I trusted them. I knew Dori was a reasonable dwarf, as was Ori, and anyway I couldn't imagine the oldest brother placing his two younger ones in danger for the sake of a mountain far away.

Everyone seemed happy enough here in the Blue Mountains.

Life was sometimes hard, but it wasn't so terrible.

I liked it here.

I had started a new life here. This place was my home too now.

The King did disappear for a month at one point and it really annoyed Dís. I had taken the decision not to participate in the debates. I had the habit now to tune the discussions out when Bofur and Dori spoke with Danà and Dís about it all.

My life was blissfully peaceful as spring arrived. I even went on two short missions as a healer in men's towns and nothing bad happened. I was immensely happy to bring back the payment for my help each time and Balin congratulated me.

That day, I knew for certain that I had my place here, with the dwarves.

They were my kin now.

My kin.

My crush for Nori had grown stronger each time I saw him. And each time he was away too. I had placed his necklace around my neck and only removed it when I was bathing. It was always there, under my tunic. I knew that from time to time, I would absentmindedly brush it through the cotton and leather I wore.

My hair had grown too and Dís had kindly proposed to braid them back for me. I knew it was an important gesture and I didn't even have to think about it before I agreed. Dís was, just like Danà, important to me. Both older women were kin too. That day, as Dís was busy brushing my hair, I finally asked what would happen if I were to cut my braids or remove the beads from my hair.

"Why would you want to do that?" The princess exclaimed worriedly while she was braiding my hair back.

"I don't want to do it." I appeased her. "I just want to know what it means. Clearly, from your reaction, it's not something to do lightly."

She snorted and replaced back the large metallic bead in my hair.

"No it's not. Cutting your braids, or removing them without redoing them or having someone to redo them…well…simply put, it means that you disown everything they stand for. For example if you removed yours, it would mean that you don't recognize Dori and Balin as your guardians." Her voice lacked any kind of amusement and I knew she was deadly serious. "And that Gloin, Danà and Gimli aren't your kin anymore. It'll mean too that you disown your allegiance to Thorin, because your beads were acknowledged by him as well."

I guessed I understood the importance of the gesture then.

"So it's truly not something I should ever do, right?"

"Not unless you are really angry or offended and you don't want anything to do anymore with any of us." Dís was speaking matter-of-factly and I nodded to show I understood.

"And what if the King banishes me?" I couldn't help but wonder, still thinking about the events that had happened with Nori ages ago.

"That won't happen. But if it were to, then yes, he'd ask you to remove your beads yourself in front of everyone. It's really shameful."

She was obviously right and I could only hope never to have to suffer through such an ordeal. We quickly changed topic, clearly neither of us wanted to think about such things for too long. Soon after my braids were done, I had to leave to prepare dinner for the brothers. I had bought some sausages and potatoes in the market that day, and I knew that Nori, for one, would love such a meal. He had just come back two days ago and I wanted to prepare something for him.

Dinner that night was nice and peaceful. Still, the day had been long so I went in my room early. Besides, the three brothers, well mostly Dori and Ori, had been behaving in an odd way all week long and it was tiring me. I glanced at them as I closed the door behind me and frowned. They were whispering to each other, frowning and gesturing sharply. I could tell that something was going on, but I had no idea why. I would have to ask them, but I just couldn't be bothered right then.

Much later that night I was turning around in my bed. I couldn't sleep. Something was bothering me, but I couldn't quite put my finger on what it was. I was trying to think about what it could be when I heard some noise coming from the corridor. Even though I felt perfectly safe here, I couldn't help but hold my breath for a second. Then I slowly stood up, intent on investigating the noise.

Before I opened my door, I pressed one of my beads between two fingers. I took some force from this. I stepped out calmly, knowing rationally that it was most likely one of the brothers and that I didn't risk anything. I walked noiselessly towards the kitchen and opened the door slowly. Silently I stepped in and realized that the noise was coming from our main cellar. Frowning, I walked straight towards it, not bothering to hide my presence.

I ended up facing Nori as he was pillaging the cellar. He hadn't noticed me, which showed he was either very tired or troubled. It was surprising that he wouldn't even feel me being here. I chuckled lightly and he spun around, startling when he saw me.

I couldn't quite discern his face in the dark, yet the feeling that something was wrong came back stronger than before. Forgetting about everything else I took a few steps and went to him. I wasn't entirely that I was controlling my body right then.

He didn't move.

He seemed completely frozen.

Even when my hand decided on its own volition to go on his cheek, he didn't seem to react. When my fingers touched his skin, I noticed his eyes fluttered shut for a second. My heart was hammering against my chest. I couldn't have looked away if I wanted to. Then he opened his grey eyes to meet my gaze with his intense one. A shiver ran down my spine. I had to concentrate to be able to formulate coherent thoughts.

"Nori?" I whispered. "Are you alright?"

He gently, even tenderly, took hold of my wrist. His hand was warm as his fingers closed around it. His thumb softly caressed the soft skin from the inside of my wrists and I had to hold my breath for a second. It was my turn now to be completely frozen. I looked wordlessly when he brought his own hand on my face, lightly caressing my cheek before grazing my braids on my left temple.

I blushed.

I knew now how tender and private a gesture this was.

"Nori?" I squeaked.

"You should be asleep."

His low whisper made me shiver and there was no doubt in my mind he felt it. I could feel his hand press a little bit more on my cheek. I tried to search his eyes for something, anything that would tell me what was happening, but I found nothing. Nori was a master thief, he knew where precious objects were hidden, and it was in his nature to hide them well in return.

I realized right then that, even though I was good at reading him, I still wasn't good enough.

"Go back to sleep Mizimul." His eyes didn't leave mine as he spoke softly.

"Nori…" He quickly turned away from me and was about to leave the room entirely when I caught his wrist.

He gently tugged away from my grasp and I followed him to the threshold.

"Nori, where are you going?" An intense feeling of dread overwhelmed me and he must have heard it in my plea for he stopped and faced me once more.

"Nori? When, when will you be back?" I knew my face was displaying how hurt I was to see him leave like…a thief in the night.

"I…" He hesitated, avoiding my gaze as he was clearly looking for his words. "Mizimul, I have to go."

Though I didn't understand this word in Khuzdul yet, I shivered at the sheer intensity in his voice. It had become something only the two of us shared and he used it when we were alone, or when he was particularly upset. The way he had pronounced it though, made my heart miss a beat. Several beat actually.

"Nori" I was aware I was almost whimpering now.

My heart understood something big was happening, but my head couldn't quite catch what it was.

This last plea seemed to break something in Nori because he let his pack fall on the floor and turned suddenly. In a second he embraced me tightly. My arms automatically encircled his waist and I buried my nose in his neck, in his beautifully braided beard.

I didn't want to let go.

I didn't know how long our embrace lasted, I only knew how close we were to one another and it felt like I should be closer still. I could feel him shiver when I strengthened my hold and I felt a shiver of my own when his hands slid from my waist to the small of my back and then up my spine. I couldn't help a sigh to escape my lips then.

Then suddenly he broke away, and my hurt at his sudden move was reflected in his own eyes.

Wordlessly he caressed my face with his warm, large hands. He tenderly stroked my cheeks, my nose. My breath caught in my throat when I saw his eyes stop and stare at my mouth. My heart stopped entirely when I felt his thumb brush lightly against my lower lip.

He approached me slowly, painfully so, and I closed my eyes when I felt his breath tingle my skin. I had to concentrate not to whimper when I felt his warmth so close to me.

He put his forehead against mine and whispered brokenly.

"Âzyung…"

My hands clutched at him fiercely and my eyes opened to meet his. I had no idea what it meant but the intensity I saw in his eyes made my knees go weak. The sound of his voice, so broken, so intense and sad, had my heart clench painfully. Hadn't it been for his arm that had sneaked back around my waist, I could have fallen in a heap at that exact moment.

He seemed to hesitate, hovering over me and I was about to inch towards him when he moved. His mouth fell on the corner of my lips, barely touching them in a painfully tantalizing way and my eyes closed once more as I concentrated on my feelings.

I wanted more.

This realization made me open my eyes in shock. I wanted more of him. It felt as if I'd never have enough.

My fists clenched on his tunic, attempting to hold him back, while I closed my eyes once more, sighing contentedly. We shifted slightly and his lips skimmed over mine, not really touching. My heart was about to burst.

I needed to be closer to him.

I needed to kiss him.

As my body inched forward, I felt him jerk away from me just as our lips would have pressed together. I opened my eyes just in time to see his back as the door was closing behind him.

"Go back to sleep, Sanmizim." His hoarse whisper sent tingles through my spine.

I was so puzzled by what had occurred that I didn't even think about going after him. My heart was beating wildly for awhile and I could feel heat burning my cheeks. I didn't know at the time whether to hate him for leaving like this or … to let my other scarily growing feelings take control over all the others I might have felt. I probably couldn't deny what I felt anymore now.

No, I just couldn't deny it anymore. I couldn't ignore it, not now, not ever.

I didn't only love him.

I didn't have a silly crush either.

I was in love with him.

Completely and utterly in love with him.

The thought made me giddy and a broad smile forced itself on my lips when I thought about what had just happened. Clearly Nori felt something for me too. And it was probably stronger than what I had been hoping for until then.

Only the fact that he was leaving for some unknown destination dampened my mood.

That night, Nori left me and my aching heart alone in a room that suddenly felt too cold, too dark and too small.

I couldn't wait for him to come back, even though I wasn't sure how I would react. I could only wait. I knew he would probably be back in a few weeks at most.

Two days later Dori and Ori went to renew some contracts in the south, arguing I couldn't go with them for one reason or another and leaving me alone in the suddenly too big and dreadfully silent apartment.

The day after that, Bofur, Bifur and Bombur left with Balin to deliver some products somewhere in the east. It struck me as odd to know that Bombur had accompanied them, but he had claimed it would be good for the opinion his betrothed's family will have of him.

One week later, Dís, Danà and I finally realized what was occurring…

Those bastards were gone.

All thirteen of them…

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><p><strong>AN: Thanks again for everyone's support and kind reviews. It's always amazing to read your comments!**

**Alright, this was probably the hardest chapter to write so far. I wrote it several times, and it took me four days to completely edit it. I really hope you liked it, because it was a pain to write! But I enjoyed every minute of it. :) Don't expect me to write such long chapters all the time though!**

**And no, they didn't really kiss...but come on, you should know by now that I just can't make it too easy for them ;)**

**I skipped quite a lot of time with this one, I just couldn't make Amelia's life in Thorin's Halls stretch on too many chapters anymore.**

**So, you don't need to be patient anymore about the quest ;) This chapter is the last one for the first part, next one will be the quest. I hope you won't mind to wait maybe a bit more for it, because it is yet another one I have to edit quite a lot. I'll update it probably sometime next week. **

**Thanks again for following this story :) **


	42. The Beginning of a Peaceful Journey

**Everything belongs to JRRTolkien.**

**I'd also like to thanks HuntressofHope for her help :)**

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><p>I woke up slowly.<p>

The cold made me shiver. Blinking a few times, it took me a short moment to realize where I was. I groaned and rubbed the sleep away from my eyes. The night hadn't been comfortable. I had been worried and a bit scared if I were entirely honest. It took some time to get used to sleep outside the Halls alone. There was no one to keep watch at night, no one to wake me if danger came my way. I didn't rest properly and I was still tired every time I woke up.

Looking around I could see that I was still in the same, very small clearing in the middle of whatever forest I had entered two days ago. Unfortunately I hadn't dreamt all the events that had lead me there. Nori had left after almost kissing me. Dori and Ori had disappeared soon after too, just like Balin, Fili and Kili, Oin and Gloin, Dwalin and the King and Bofur, Bombur and Bifur. Thirteen dwarves had left our Halls in one short week. Thirteen dwarves had lied or left wordlessly, which wasn't really better.

It shouldn't have been worrisome. It was actually rather normal, especially at the start of spring when the trades' roads were opening again after the winter period. Dwarves needed trade. They needed to leave the safety of their Halls in order to survive. It was twisted and sad, but it was true. Maybe it should have been completely normal, hadn't it been those thirteen dwarves.

I knew for a fact that Oin never went outside. Never. He was too grumpy to deal with other people, and the fact he was deaf wasn't really considered as strength. Gloin only left for special missions, just like Bifur, and from what I knew Bombur had never been on any mission at all. But all those were just a few facts that hinted something was going on.

The real problem was that Dís and Danà knew very well where all those idiots were running. As soon as we had realized the thirteen dwarves had disappeared, Dís and Danà had told me all about it. They wanted to go back to Erebor, their lost kingdom. During the past months, Dís had at length worried about the fact that the King received several letters before he met with someone in some men's town. She had spent her time these past weeks bothering him about it. After he came back he hadn't been the same, or so Dís said.

I sighed and took the time to look around, scratching the back of my head and yawning loudly. This forest was rather charming right now, and only my thoughts troubled its peace. I quickly brushed my hair with my fingers, not really worrying all that much about the tangles, but still taking the time to remove the leaves and twigs.

My thoughts were almost entirely focused on the past weeks events.

I had known, of course, about the discussions. Only a complete deaf or stupid person wouldn't have known about them. I was after all living with three of those thirteen dwarves and most of the others spent lots of time in our home. So yes, I had heard here and there words whispered or discussion abruptly stopped. At some point I had started to worry about all those secrets. But Dori had told me it was only talks, that they wouldn't go anywhere. I had trusted him. How could I not trust Dori?

I should have realized when Nori left. How blind could I be? It was obvious that something was amiss that night. Nori's behaviour had been nothing like usual. I should have told Danà and Dís back then, when the others were still around, that Nori had left without a word in the night. I didn't know why I had kept quiet about it. I hadn't even said a word to Dori or Ori. Maybe it was because of the circumstances of his departure. I wanted to keep it to myself. It belonged to us. I didn't want to share it.

I had kept my mouth shut and it had taken us quite some time to put the pieces together after the dwarves' departure.

Dís and Danà had reacted quite strongly when we had realized what was happening. I had never seen either of them behave in such a way before. Dís had always been a steady and strong person. I could still remember the confident way she had entered the healing wards when I first met her. She had looked as if nothing could scare her. And Danà was quite similar; though she was calmer than Dís she still was obviously a tough dwarf.

Seeing both of them shattered in such a way had greatly disturbed me.

The truth was neither Dís nor Danà wanted their loved ones to be hurt or die. It was only natural. Dís had lost too much already, and she was furious against her brother for taking her two sons along on this mad quest. I hadn't argued with her but I knew that Fili and Kili had probably forced their ways in their uncle's company. Still, I understood her worries. I was already worried for the three brothers who had abandoned me behind.

Thankfully, Danà had managed to catch Gimli as he tried to sneak out after his father. The young dwarf hadn't been aware of his father's plan until it was too late and was clearly upset about it. He had apparently been deemed too young by the others to go.

I sighed and went to my saddle bags. I grabbed my water skin and drank a bit. I needed to get going. Even though my thoughts were once again going through the events, I couldn't afford to take my time. I let my memories come back to the forefront of my mind while my body mechanically went through its usual tasks.

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><p>Danà and Dís words kept replaying in my mind.<p>

I couldn't help but bit my lower lip in worry. After discussing it with them we had all agreed that those thirteen dwarves were probably going to that mountain, Erebor. I couldn't believe it took us so long to realize that. I couldn't believe the three brothers lied to me. It hurt to realize that they actually wouldn't trust me with such a secret. I was scared for them now. I was angry at them too. I didn't know what to think or feel anymore.

Dís' entrance in our kitchen tore me away from my thoughts. She strode quickly to the table and I looked down on the parchment that she swiftly unrolled on the large kitchen table. The paper was dry and the ink was barely visible in some parts. My heart was hammering in my chest as I let my eyes wander on the map. It hadn't stopped beating strongly since I had realized that the brothers had left without me.

Taking a slow inhale, I tried to calm myself a bit and concentrated on the map.

I let my fingers graze the parchment, following some imaginary route between the Halls and Erebor.

It would have been a long journey if I had a car and if motorways existed. Attempting to go there without it seemed completely crazy to me. There were mountains to cross, rivers and forests too. It was miles and miles away. The map wasn't really precise either and only the biggest obstacles were drawn on it. That was nothing like the maps available in my world. The more I looked at this map, the more it just looked like an old painting and the less it appeared to be a map for me. This just couldn't do.

Danà was uncharacteristically biting her lower lips and wringing her hands. I could see in her eyes how afraid she was. It seemed like a bad omen that she would behave like this. After all, Gloin was a very strong warrior. Danà wouldn't be even half this worried if Gloin left for a regular mission. It was only a slight relief to know that Oin was with the group. At least he would be able to help heal their wounded. Because apparently, there was no doubt in Dís and Danà's heads that some of the dwarves would be wounded.

"This is madness." Dís kept on muttering, wringing her fingers too.

The two of them were doing nothing to help me stay calm.

My heart hammered some more at the thought of Nori, Dori or Ori being killed on the roadside. Just after that, fury boiled in my veins. These three idiots had all but abandoned me when they left. And I could clearly remember Dori's appeasing words that they would probably not go anyway. I knew only one thing for certain at that instant; he and his brothers were going to wish they hadn't lied to me. Dori and Ori had even told me they had left for the south. And I could already picture myself wandering aimlessly in that direction after having spent years waiting for their returns.

"We're not even sure which way they're going to take." Danà whispered.

"Where do you think they'll pass the mountains?" Dís asked the other woman.

I tuned them out. I couldn't participate in their discussion anyway. My mind was too busy thinking about the end of their quest. The dwarves were hoping that the dragon was dead. A dragon! I could barely believe it existed. I still couldn't help but think it was only a sort of very fat lizard that looked nothing like what I understood a dragon should be. The thought of going anywhere near it seemed like pure madness and I could only agree with Dís.

A broken sob made me look back at my two friends.

It was the first time I saw Dís actually cry.

She looked completely broken as she sobbed. Her back was hunched and she seemed to be smaller than she was. Faint tremors agitated her and I felt my chest tightened at the sight. She was so certain she would never see her two sons and her brother ever again. There was no way, she repeated endlessly, that any of them would survive against the dragon. And that was if they survived long enough to arrive there.

My heart plummeted in my stomach and I felt sick at seeing the princess in such a state. Danà was clearly worried, but it was nothing like this. No. Seeing Dís so broken, so desperate, made me want to slap the King and his nephews. Maybe I would do it too.

Dís' cries were not loud. But in the silence of the room it felt as if she was shouting and yelling.

I swallowed thickly before I softly spoke. I had taken my decision. In a second the idea had been ingrained in my mind and was now deeply rooted.

"I'm going after them."

My voice had barely been above a murmur but both Dís and Danà heard it clearly. Danà's eyes were wide and her mouth hanged open. She was quite obviously speechless. Dís didn't say a word either at first. But then her eyes shone with a dangerous gleam.

"Bring them back." She said, catching my arm in an almost painful hold.

I looked into her red rimmed eyes. The pain and fear I saw made my heart ache some more. I had taken a decision and was determined.

"Amelia. Bring my sons and brother back to me alive." She insisted.

I gingerly placed my hand over hers and nodded.

"I will. I promise."

This promise, I made it to myself too. I would do everything I could to find the dwarves and bring them back, all thirteen of them.

After those few words, everything seemed to happen in a blur. The words had been spoken and a promise made to a dwarf was as binding as a contract somehow. I had given my word to Dís, the princess of the Halls, and now I had to act accordingly.

Danà didn't blink as she strode to my room and started to prepare travel bags for me. Meanwhile, I followed Dís down to the men's town and she bought a horse. A real horse. She didn't even seem to think about it. The three of us seemed to be completely dazed.

Not even two hours later I was on top of that horse and I was leaving the high stone doors behind me. I didn't even try to glance back. I knew both Dís and Danà were there, watching me leave. My eyes were riveted on the horizon. I hadn't taken a second to think this through. It had been a reaction.

I had no idea what awaited me ahead.

I couldn't know but I would keep going until I either found the dwarves or had no other choice but to go back.

* * *

><p>Remembering the events reminded me how I felt that day. The anger and the doubt were as strong now as they had been then. My ears could still hear the sound of Dís' cries and when I closed my eyes I had no problem seeing the scenes repeat endlessly behind my closed eyelids.<p>

I shook my head to clear my thoughts and stretched my aching limbs. I groaned when I felt my back crack a bit and heard a loud pop. Sleeping on the ground was really not comfortable.

Simply recalling the past week's events was making my heart ache. Nori, Dori and Ori had left me. They had abandoned me. What did they think I would do if they died? What if they never came back? They hadn't even said anything. They had just left!

Absentmindedly I tried to calculate how long I had been on the road.

A week.

Just a mere little week and so many things had changed.

A week after this terrible discussion with Dís and Danà, here I was.

Alone.

In the wild.

I could squint my eyes all I wanted, I wouldn't see anything around. No houses. No roads. And damn it all, I couldn't even see any dwarf.

Crouching once again I quickly rolled the blanket I had used that night and then went to my horse. The animal was really tall for me, but it had been the only one that was available. I scratched him under his mane for a few seconds. It was a good natured horse and in a week I had already come to love him. I pressed my forehead against its neck and closed my eyes.

I felt as if my mind was trapped. It was as if I couldn't physically think of anything else but the thirteen dwarves and my decision to go after them.

It had been a spur of the moment decision. I just couldn't bear the thought of waiting for news. Maybe it was a terrible mistake, but at that instant, while Dís was crying, I had decided to follow them, or at least to try to find them. I had been certain that the two older women would try to stop me. And I wasn't sure how I felt when they hadn't.

I wasn't a warrior or an adventurer. I knew it of course. I was under no delusion that this would be easy. Not at all. But compared to the average skills a regular person in this world had, I wasn't so bad. I probably was one of the best healers around, well, that I knew of. Even Dís' skills weren't on par with mine. My knowledge of plants might be less important than hers, but I was able to operate internal wounds and open wounds better than any of them. Most of all, I was able to ride that huge horse better than any dwarf could, and I was probably the only one with a chance to change some of these suicidal idiots' minds too. After all, guilt was a powerful feeling and some of them would learn it the hard way. I had no intention of being nice with any of them, least of all the three brothers.

I looked up, taking a step back from the horse. The sun was still rather low in the horizon. I couldn't see it behind the trees, but I knew from the light. Even though days were getting warmer, mornings were still rather chilly and I couldn't help but shiver a bit.

I saddled the horse and thanked my aunt yet again for her kindness. I could still remember how she had wanted me to learn how to ride. It was soon after my parents' deaths. I could guess my aunt thought it would take my mind off things. It hadn't, but it had been a sweet gesture. At any rate it was rather useful now. Besides, my pitiful riding skills had improved quickly after a week riding almost non-stop.

The skin of my thigh was a bit raw and some muscles I had never used were aching all day and all night long. My back hurt me a bit too and I could barely walk normally. My knees felt weak every time I put my feet back on the ground. All in all it was far from a pleasant experience, but at least I was going faster with that horse.

I had to take care of it and myself at the same time. Taking a proper care of the animal wasn't bothering me. One thing was certain though, the horse wouldn't go hungry. I on the contrary was forced to ration my food to make it last as much as possible. Until now I had been lucky enough to find some streams and I hadn't needed to ration water.

I fastened my bag and blanket to the saddle, grabbed an apple from one of the smaller side bags, and quickly jumped on the horse. I had to readjust the stirrups once I was on the saddle, but it took me less than a minute. As I pressed my heels against the horse's flanks, I bit in the apple and munched my breakfast peacefully while the animal started its slow pace. Every so often I would check behind me that my bag, blanket and staff were still properly fastened, I didn't want to lose any of them.

After awhile I took the map Dís had given me and wondered where exactly I was. After a week spent riding, I should have reached a town called Bree. It was a large town not too far from Archet. What worried me though, was that I might have already travelled further as I had done my best to avoid Archet. I had intended to avoid the bloody town and its forest but the result was that I was unsure of where exactly I was.

I was probably too far north. I had to try and find this 'east road' that Danà had pointed to me. My finger skimmed over the old parchment as I read once again the foreign sign. I said read, but in all truth I was just remembering where Danà had placed her fingers as she spoke. This handicap was yet another problem. I sighed and folded the map before I looked around. The previous evening I had reached the border of a forest. I had the choice then between camping at its edge and going back under the canopy's protection for the night. I had chosen the later and I was now once more facing green rolling hills.

I bit my lip.

I didn't like the fact that I would be completely defenceless. There was nowhere to hide once I left the forest. I didn't have the choice though. There were neither roads nor dwarves in sight. I had to find them. I had to convince them to go back, or at the very least I had to follow them. I could only hope they would see reason because I really didn't want to cross half the world to go to a stupid mountain that was supposedly inhabited by a dragon.

Well, if the worst came to happen, at least I knew how to deal with burns and cuts of all kinds. I just didn't have enough qualification to stitch back chewed limbs and heal roasted bodies. I shivered and quickly tried to push those thoughts away. I could still hope that dragons didn't exist…but well, dwarves did so…

I patted the horse's mane. Harràs was a kind animal. I forced him to canter and let the landscape pass under its hooves as we quickly rode up and down small hills. After awhile, I slowed him down. I knew I shouldn't let him gallop too much even though I wanted to quickly find the dwarves. All week long I had alternated between paces and I knew that I should have seen a sign of the dwarves already, had I been on the right road.

According to the sun, I was going in the right direction. I was riding towards the East. But I had no idea if I would find the dwarves and I truly didn't know up to which point I should go before giving up. I couldn't possibly ride to that stupid mountain on my own. First of all I wouldn't have enough food to last for such a trip and I didn't know how to hunt. Second, I had no illusions; the longer I stayed in the wild, the more I risked being attacked. I still didn't know what those orcs were supposed to look like, but if the dwarves' stories were true, I didn't want to meet any of those creatures.

My little decision seemed to be stupider as minutes ticked by.

Being on my own was odd.

I wasn't used to this anymore.

It gave me way too much time to think.

And my thoughts that had once been completely messy were now clearer than ever.

I was in love with Nori. I couldn't hide it. I couldn't deny it. And from what I could tell, I had reasons to hope he felt at least slightly the same.

Now the problem was that the idiot had run away on a mad quest which would most certainly end with his death.

I hadn't told Dís or Danà, but I wasn't entirely going after the dwarves for any of their pleas. I wasn't such an altruist. I wanted to kick some sense into Nori. I didn't want him to die. And I was so mad at him. I wanted to slap him for leaving me behind. No I wasn't going for Dís' sons or Danà's husband. I was going for my own sanity. I had realized it and was honest enough to acknowledge it. I couldn't possibly see any future for me in the dwarves' Halls if Nori, Dori and Ori weren't there.

From my first day in this world I had been with them. Every damn time I had been separated from them, something bad had happened. Every damn time. That wasn't to say that nothing happened when the four of us were together; that would be a lie. But at least when they were with me, when Nori was with me, I was confident enough. I was stronger with them. I wouldn't survive without them. I didn't want to.

If they wanted to go on this quest so badly, then I would follow. I didn't care what they would think; there was just no way that they would leave me behind once I found them.

I couldn't let them go in the wild without me.

I just couldn't.

I shook my head and looked ahead. Who knew that finding dwarves could prove so difficult?

Three more days passed without any dwarves in sight. I had left the low hills behind me a day and a half ago and I was now facing a large river that snaked between higher hills, large boulders and trees. Harràs waited patiently for me to decide whether or not we should attempt to cross it. According to the map, I should have found a road and a bridge that crossed the river. I hadn't found any and I was reluctant to walk up or down river. It would make me lose time and possibly miss the dwarves. On the other hand, I had no idea where they could be right then and I doubted they would cross the river anywhere; they were most certainly on the road.

I sighed and rubbed my forehead tiredly.

My food supplies were running low. If I rationed myself, I could probably go on for another day or two before I had no other choice but to gallop back to the halls. And even then, I probably would be hungry before I arrived there.

I didn't want to give up.

I had that terrible fear that I would never see the dwarves again. Well, Nori, Dori and Ori mostly. Though I cared for the others, they just didn't matter as much as the three brothers. It might have been terrible to admit it, but if was the blunt truth. Thinking that I might never see Nori ever again made me want to cry already. My chest tightened painfully.

Maybe it was the pain.

Maybe it was the fear.

Maybe it was some sort of instinct.

I couldn't tell, but something made me take the decision here and then. Slowly I pressed Harràs' flanks and the kind horse took a first tentative step in the water.

The river was large but didn't seem to be too deep. I trusted Harràs to know what to do anyway. Half way in the river, the water arrived up to the middle of my calves. Still, Harràs valiantly walked to the other side where I let him have a break.

In front of me I could see the rocky hills slowly becoming mountains and forests.

I took the time to get down and filled the water skins I was carrying. Even though I didn't have much food left, at least I had enough water to calm my hunger. Before long I was back on Harràs and he was trotting in the forest's direction. I had tried to go a bit towards south to find the east road, but it felt pointless.

My mood was ever changing between anger, pain, worry, optimism and pessimism.

That night I had trouble sleeping. Something was making my skin crawl. I was afraid of the darkness for the first time in awhile but I didn't dare try and lighten a fire. I didn't know how long it would take me, I still had troubles with that, and I didn't want to alert anyone or anything of my presence. Until then I had merely felt uncomfortable at night, but right then something made me feel truly anxious.

Maybe I had made a mistake in going in the wild by myself. Now that I thought a bit about it, Dís and Danà were probably too upset to think properly. Dís was clearly overwhelmed by sadness when she asked me to go out to find her sons and Danà was clearly a bit lost too. For my part, I hadn't really taken the time to think. I had just decided to leave.

How could I stay in the brothers' house with the thought that they might never come back?

But now that I was on my own in the wild, I couldn't help but realize it had been slightly stupid at the very least. How could I expect to find them? I wasn't even sure they were going in that direction. They might have decided to go south or north first. They might be days ahead or I might be walking just a mile away from them. There was actually no way for me to find them. There were no phones or radios here. No motorway to follow. No one to ask if dwarves had come around.

How could I be quite so stupid?

How?

Nori would be furious if he knew…

Well, good for him. I was furious against him too. That idiot had left me. He had left me alone in the night after almost kissing me. Almost. He hadn't even kissed me.

Tears prickled my eyes as I thought of that moment we had shared.

It was bittersweet in the most painful way possible.

I was torn away of these thoughts as Harràs whined and started to pull on the rope I had attached to a tree. I frowned. Standing up I stumbled on the saddle that I had settled on the ground, before I managed to reach the horse. I tried to calm him but nothing I did seemed to have any effect. He seemed rather intent on running away and that put my own nerves on edge. What was scaring him? My anxiety suddenly reached new heights.

I let my gaze trail around in the darkness and then only did I realize that there was a small flickering light further away. My heart leapt. There were two possibilities. Either this was the light of the dwarves' fire, or not. The simple thought that it might be the dwarves overjoyed me.

Finally my luck was turning and I might actually find them. I wanted to run toward the light, but my practical and cautious mind forced me to take some other measures. I gathered my bag and took my long staff that was attached to it. I already had my two daggers and my knife, but the staff was usually attached to my bag when I rode.

Holding it made me feel a bit safer.

The light weight of my backpack on my shoulders wouldn't hinder my moves and I slowly started to make my way towards the light. As I came closer I could hear some noise and I could smell that something was being cooked. Maybe Bombur was preparing some stew or soup. No, it wasn't that. It smelt like a roast. The simple idea of eating Bombur's roast made my mouth water. But this thought was quickly pushed away by the fact that I might very soon see Nori again.

I could have cried of joy right then.

As I came closer, I could see that the fire was made in a clearing with large rocks around it. I tried to be silent as I walked. I wasn't sure how the dwarves would react when they would see me. I could only hope they wouldn't kill me at first sight. They might overreact though.

I stepped over a fallen log and pushed some bushes away to look at the clearing.

My heart stopped for a second.

My brain froze.

For a moment that seemed an eternity I could have been as good as dead.

Then adrenaline started to pump through my veins and my heart rate skyrocketed as my eyes widened. Pure, primal fear grew in my stomach, twisting it painfully. My gaze was riveted on the most frightening sight I had ever witnessed.

Nothing could have prepared me for this.

Right in the middle of the clearing, three massive creatures were roasting something that definitely looked human if the long torso, legs and arms with a head were anything to go by. I couldn't move at all as I saw one of the huge, great beasts extend a hand before ripping the arms off the poor man that had been roasted. My brain registered every gruesome detail; the sound of the bones breaking, of the burnt flesh tearing, the colour of the burnt skin, its smell, the way juices seemed to drip here and there as if it were nothing but some lamb or beef meat and the awful, terribly awful way the man's jaw was set, as if stuck in a permanent silent scream.

I felt something break in my mind.

My fingers lost all strength and I let my staff clatter loudly on the rocks. Immediately the three creatures turned their heads towards me. There was a short fleeting minute before my brain started to work again. This was undoubtedly a fight or flight moment and right now, 'flight' seemed like the only option. Somehow I still found it in me to quickly bend and grab my staff before I dashed away through the forest.

My only chance was to ride Harràs. Only the horse could possibly distance those giants.

As soon as I started to run away, I heard voices immediately followed by a deafening cracking noise. The ground trembled under my feet and a quick glance above my shoulder informed me that two creatures were on my trail and a few trees were now down.

I was almost halfway to my camp when the tree I had just ran past cracked loudly and started to fall in my direction.

I screamed and jumped to my side. My heart was beating loudly, pumping adrenaline in my veins.

I fell painfully against a rock before leafed branches slammed and slapped against my back, forcing yet another yelp out of my mouth. I tried to extricate myself from under the broken foliage when my eyes saw huge grey fingers coming my way. I cried out and rolled on my back, ignoring the pain in my limbs as small branches and stones jabbed me. My hair was caught in some branches, but I ignored the pain and just kept moving. My bag was stuck somehow and the more I struggled the less I seemed to be able to move. The large hand removed the branches easily and I took the opportunity to hit it with my staff. It wasn't nearly as strong as what I could have done. I didn't have any space around me to actually swing my weapon, but it apparently still did the trick.

The creature let a pained, or maybe annoyed, grunt out before it tried to grab me again.

I was so terrified though, that I was suddenly quicker and after hearing another crack, I felt that I was suddenly free. Immediately I was crawling my way out of this trap. Scrambling to my feet, I found myself facing the second monster and my first reaction was to bat the hands away with my staff before running in a random direction.

My brain didn't register that I was running right toward their fire until I found myself facing the third one. This time, I couldn't avoid the hand that slapped me. I felt as if I had hit a wall as all air was rushed out of my lungs.

One second I was running, the next I was violently hit.

It was only when my body crashed loudly in a nearby bush that I realized the creature had sent me flying quite far. Even though I tried to get back on my feet, I couldn't. In my mind, I could imagine I looked like a disarticulated puppet right then. My vision was blurry and I couldn't quite decide where the sky and the ground were.

My head kept spinning.

It was quite disheartening to realize that the only hit I had received had been already too much for me.

I couldn't fight the fingers that snaked around me and pulled me out of the bush. The thorns bit my hands and arms but I barely felt it. I tried to blink and clarify my vision but nothing I did seemed to work.

I could feel blood trickling on the side of my face but I really had trouble registering what was currently happening to me. In a matter of minutes I had been chased, beaten and caught by creatures I hadn't known even existed. Were they orcs? If they were, I would have to tell the dwarves that their descriptions were really, really terrible.

A broken sob escaped my lips as I thought that I might never see the dwarves ever again.

Pain erupted in my chest as I tried to breathe deeply and it was echoed by the dull pain throbbing in my head.

Suddenly I really couldn't remember how all this had started. My mind was blurred by fear and pain. I didn't want to end up roasted and eaten by monsters, but apparently it would be my fate. My lips trembled as I thought that I could be home right now, listening to my friend's banter and happily doing whatever was to be done. Maybe I would be preparing some stew, cleaning a bit around the living room or simply writing notes in my book.

If I closed my eyes tightly enough, I could almost imagine the warmth of the hearth, the smell of the stew, and sounds of cheeky voices; I could hear them bantering, complaining, joking.

I could see two grey eyes looking at me with this cheeky light twinkling in them and that small smirk that would always manage to warm my heart.

Yes, it was what I thought of when my mind drifted to think of home. Home meant warmth. Home meant laughs and loud discussions. Home meant them being around.

It was funny how I had so quickly forgotten the rest. Now that I was facing such a terrible situation, I could admit it too. The far past, or so I called it held nothing but memories for me. And those memories were fading quickly compared to those of my new life. Home will always be there now, in the heart of the mountain and never would I be able to think of my birth place as something else than a dreamlike experience.

Yet it didn't explain how I ended up in this situation.

My head was hurting and I could feel the blood dripping and coating my long brownish hair. My lungs were burning and I gasped to try and breathe some more but my chest was painfully crushed under the beast's fingers. Its skin seemed as hard as rock and scrapped my tender flesh while its grip was probably stronger than anything I could imagine.

What were these creatures?

I felt its grip on me tighten and I couldn't help but let out the little air I had in my lungs in a painful whimper.

The creature lifted me higher and closer to its face and took a whiff at my hair while I had to concentrate hard to avoid puking. Being hung upside down, near such a stinking creature apparently had a churning effect on my stomach.

My situation couldn't be worse. I was going to die, alone in the wilderness and no one could or would come and help me. My mission, or let's say attempt, to find the dwarves had been a failure. A complete failure. I hadn't found them and I would end up being eaten.

Oh dear Mahal, if only you could help.

Tears gathered in my eyes as I realized with certainty that no one would help me. This would be it.

The creatures were talking together but I didn't pay attention. I could feel the blood rushing to my head and was steadily growing dizzier and fainter.

I could see black dots clouding my vision. My thoughts were suddenly filled entirely with my friends. They would never know what happened to me, where I went and disappeared. I knew they were going to be sad and most likely feel slightly guilty too. I wanted to use guilt against them, but right now, knowing they would feel it when it was my own stupidity and lack of discernment that had lead me here, made me feel actually worse than I already was.

Then it hit me; I would never see them again, I would never see Nori again.

I wanted to scream but I could barely breathe already.

Remorse rushed through me. It felt as if everything that had been done, everything that had happened, meant nothing. I was going to die in the most stupid way possible, and it was my fault.

Yeah. I really outdid myself this time and I messed up once again.

I would never have the chance to apologize for being stupid enough to run in the wilderness by myself. How could I think for even a second that I would be fine? How could I believe that I would be able to find them? I had been doomed even before it even started. I wasn't from this world. I knew nothing of true survival. Experimented dwarves died in the wild. I wasn't one of them and this gruesome outcome should have been obvious from the start.

Friendly faces appeared in front of my closed eyes and I addressed each of them a silent apology, praying for them, hoping they would at least be safe. The last one would probably haunt me until my heart finally stopped.

Nori…

Oh, how I wished now that I had told him everything when I had the time. I should have taken the decision faster. I should have waited for them. Surely Nori would have done his best to come back to me.

Surely…

He wouldn't have left me alone in the Halls.

He probably loved me too.

Yeah, he probably did.

The idiot…

What a waste it all had been.

My ears seemed to stop working and the only sound that registered in my brain was a rushing noise. My eyes were unseeing. The burn in my chest was all consuming. The pounding in my head was stronger than ever.

And then nothing.

* * *

><p>When I opened my eyes again, I couldn't see anything.<p>

Blinking didn't change the fact that everything around me was dark. I didn't know if it was a good thing or not that I was apparently still alive. How did I know I wasn't dead? Well, I was hurting way too much to be dead. My body was probably black and blue if the stiffness and the lingering pain were anything to go by. My head was pounding and I was dizzy even though I was lying motionless on the ground. My left cheek was pressed against the cold floor and I didn't know whether I should try to move or not. My thoughts were foggy at best.

As my senses slowly came back to me I realized that there was a terrible smell permeating the heavy, stiff air around me. My empty stomach lurched and I gagged. Even though I tried, I couldn't stop myself from being sick.

The bile rose up my throat and I tried to sit up to retch. Only then did I realize that my hands were bound tightly by thick ropes and that my body was hurting so much that I could barely move. The sudden jolt of pain didn't help my stomach and I ended up being sick just where I was. Thankfully my mind was clear enough that I rolled completely on my side and avoided choking myself.

Tears were rolling on my cheeks before long and I rolled away, wincing as I felt every damn muscle in my body protest loudly to this rude treatment. I winced at the pain that flared from my limbs and upper torso. It was made worse when I felt some sorts of objects jab in my flesh as I rolled a bit further. Even those slight moves had my head spinning, as if I had been on a roller coaster.

I tried to concentrate on something, anything that would keep my mind busy and give time to my stomach to settle.

The ground felt odd. It was a bit crunchy, as if I was lying on dry twigs, branches and leaves, but it didn't feel like it under my fingers. It was completely uneven and I could feel the rock and dirt between those weird twigs. Some of them seemed rather long and thick too. I gave up quickly on finding out what those things were. It didn't really matter.

There wasn't enough light for me to see anything. Actually there was no light at all and the only thing I could see with my opened eyes was the darkness. Maybe I had become blind. I seemed to recall hitting my head and I could feel the sticky and still slightly humid mess against my temple. That wasn't encouraging at all.

I lay on my back, eyes open and staring at nothing.

What was going to happen now?

My empty stomach, the tiredness and the pain in my head and body were probably all parts of the reason why my eyes fluttered close and I lost consciousness again.

Oddly enough, just as my mind drifted off, I seemed to hear Nori's voice.

* * *

><p>The second time I awoke was to a blinding light that seemed to painfully pierce my skull. At least I wasn't blind. Tears immediately pooled in my eyes but I forced myself to look around. My neck protested vehemently but I ignored the pain. I was in a small cave, very small, and it was closed by some weird bars. I would probably be able to stand but wouldn't be able to stretch my arms up without touching the ceiling. It wasn't very wide either, probably around two meters, but it was longer, maybe more than thrice longer than it was wide actually. I craned my neck despite the pain and checked the bars that closed the small cave. It didn't look like they were made of metal, and the floor seemed covered by the same material, though the rock and dirt were still apparent here and there. It was an odd material. It clearly wasn't metal. Maybe it was some sort of wood, but it was more yellowy than brown. I turned my head to look at the thing against which my cheek was resting.<p>

My breath was instantly caught in my throat and I felt as though I would be sick once more.

Bones.

Human bones.

I was lying in a cave covered and closed by human bones.

I whimpered in fear, only to recoil when a huge face looked at me through the bars, partially hiding the light source.

I tried to crawl to the back of the cave, even though it was completely pointless. At this moment though, any rational thoughts had left me. Fear dictated my actions. I probably looked like some worm aimlessly gesticulating on the floor.

"Why can't we eat her now?" The face said with a heavy, almost incomprehensible accent.

I whimpered once more and tried to press my back further against the back wall. I was trembling.

"Because we got the mutton to eat tonight." A second voice said.

"We'll keep her for tomorrow." A third voice added and I whimpered again.

As the three voices argued together I closed my eyes and sobbed. There was no way out of this situation. I was going to be eaten. I was going to be roasted. Images of the previous night came back to my mind. Soon enough I would be the one screaming in pain and fear as I would be slowly roasted on a stick over a fire. Vivid memories forced their way to the forefront of my mind and I felt bile rise up my throat again. The smell, the sounds…everything was heightening my panic and I found it suddenly hard to breath.

My mouth was dry and my lips cracked. I was hungry and dizzy at the same time, which wasn't a nice feeling. My head was still hurting me, the pain pounding loudly in a steady rhythm as if to mimic a drum. But among all those issues, nothing mattered because I would die, eaten and cooked alive by monsters.

My life was forfeit.

"Amelia."

I whimpered as my ears started to ring.

"Amelia."

I opened my eyes slightly at the sound of my name. Looking up I startled at the sight of Nori calling me from the other side of the bars.

"Amelia. What are you doing here?" He asked me, his eyes wide open and looking terrified.

"Nori?" I couldn't believe it. How had he found me?

"Amelia! Quickly, come, we have to leave this place."

"I know." My speech was slurred.

"Amelia!" He insisted.

It was Nori. My brain was trying to tell me something but I ignored it completely. My eyes knew what they saw. It was Nori. Nori was here. Once again he was the one saving me, helping me, protecting me.

Slowly I crawled in his direction, ignoring the pain in my muscles and the way bones would painfully jab me. It felt like an eternity, but Nori was there, encouraging me, urging me to him.

"Amelia. Quick." He whispered, suddenly seeming more afraid.

I looked up as the light seemed to flicker before it went out completely. The last thing I saw was Nori's worried face. I yelped as everything went black.

"Nori? Nori?" I kept calling when my ears started to ring again.

Suddenly I heard a long, terrible cry that froze my blood in my veins. What was going on? Where was Nori?

"Nori!" I cried out.

The only answer I received was another terrible whine.

I cried myself to oblivion that night, or was it day time? I didn't know. As soon as Nori had left, I had been abandoned in complete darkness once more.

* * *

><p>My limbs were aching. I didn't know how long I had been bound in the same position but it was a real torture. My arms and shoulders were bent in an unnatural angle and the pressure had been painful for awhile now. I had thought to try and get free, but I could barely move my fingers.<p>

Nori kept bothering me about it though. He was pestering me. He kept asking me to try. At least the sound of his voice helped me to fight the fear the darkness created. I tried to tell him that I couldn't move, and that my arms were bound so tightly that I feared I would lose the use of my hands. He didn't care. It was as if the strict trainer was back. I couldn't see him, but his voice was ever present. I had asked him why he didn't help me, but he hadn't answered. I had no idea where he was or why he was here. I had no idea where he went sometimes as he seemed to disappear.

During one of the times when he left me, I tried to assess my situation more methodically.

My daggers and boots had been taken from me. I was bound in my light under tunic and breeches. I had no idea where my bag or other clothes were. My staff and weapons had disappeared too.

Even the cold feeling of my beads against my cheeks and neck, and the feeling of Nori's necklace on my skin, weren't enough to cheer me up. Nori had been silent for a while now. I was almost certain he was gone. Or had he been there at all? I tried to remember whether I had seen him or dreamt his presence. I couldn't be sure and it scared me.

What if I had dreamt his presence? What if I had hallucinated? What if I hadn't but he had left? What if he had been killed by the monsters? Where were the others? Why had Nori been alone here? Were they dead?

For a second, I seemed to regain some lucidity.

The pain in my head was pulsating but I suddenly knew that Nori had never been there. I knew that it had only been a dream, or a hallucination. Then the reality of my situation hit me.

If anything it just broke my heart in smaller pieces to know that I would never see Nori or the others again because I would end up in those monsters' stomachs. There would be nothing left of me. They would never know, never find my body. I would be eaten and my bones would be thrown in this cave.

A broken sob racked my body again, the slight movement sending tendrils of pain throughout my body.

I had seen the light flickering a bit earlier and had heard the voices talking about finding some fresh mutton that night. I had guessed it meant my life was prolonged for another day. Strangely enough, I didn't care.

I didn't see how it would change anything for me.

A lonely tear rolled on my cheek.

This time, I was glad when I finally lost consciousness.

* * *

><p>A part of my brain knew I was hallucinating, but my whole being believed that what my eyes saw was real. Nori was back. He was there, on the other side of the bars again. He was gripping the bones tightly and was obviously trying to break them. His eyes seemed terrified as they looked at me. I was lying motionlessly on the ground, staring at him as he was trying to speak to me. I could see his lips move but no sound reached me.<p>

He seemed to turn at some point and yelled something in another direction.

I blinked and looked at him. It was as if I was watching a movie, I couldn't seem to react to anything I saw. I didn't even twitch when several other dwarves appeared in my line of sight.

The King was there. I easily recognized Dori, Bofur, Ori and Balin too.

They all started to speak at the same time but I still didn't react.

Actually the only thing that made me move was the sight of a large grey hand suddenly appearing and grabbing Ori. I jerked and sat, screaming while Ori convulsed. More grey hands appeared and the dwarves couldn't do anything as they were grabbed and thrown through the cave.

I could only scream as they all died in front of me. My eyes were widely open and riveted on Nori's face, on his neck that was twisted in an unnatural angle. Tears burnt my cheeks and a rushing noise kept covering any other sound.

Then the light went out and the darkness finally hid my friends' bodies from my sight.

I remained there, breathless, motionless, and more terrified than ever. Would this nightmare ever stop?

* * *

><p>Hallucination or not, I couldn't help but try to beg Nori to go away when he appeared again. I couldn't watch him die another time. The events were always different. Sometimes Nori wasn't even the first one to appear. Sometimes it was Dori, Ori, Balin or even the King. Sometimes I would hear their voices before they arrived. But always, always the hands would come and grab them. Always they would die. All of them. After that first time where I had only screamed I tried to crawl their way. I tried to tell them to go away. Nothing I did ever worked.<p>

Little by little I was losing all my strengths.

My head wasn't really hurting anymore, but it felt light from the lack of food and water. Even if I suddenly found a way to unbind myself, I probably wouldn't have the strength to crawl away. The last time the dwarves had appeared I had tried to break free only to realize that I could barely move anymore. At least two days had passed since the last time I had drunk and eaten anything. Maybe I would die from thirst or starvation first. I didn't know what would be the best way to go.

Minutes, and probably hours, ticked by.

Nori didn't appear in the darkness. The others didn't either. He didn't try to speak with me anymore. Maybe the last time I saw them die had been real?

My heart hammered against my chest at the thought.

It was terrifying to realize that I would rather be completely demented than know that they were dead for real.

The silence was deafening but I didn't dare move. I didn't want to hear the bones crunch under my weight. It would be too much for my mind. I couldn't avoid the sickening images of that man being eaten to replay in my thoughts endlessly. When the dwarves weren't there, it was this man that haunted me. Each time the details were as vivid as the first time I recalled them. Each time my pulse quickened as I thought that it would happen to me too.

Fear and exhaustion paralysed me.

Still, I couldn't help but wince and recoil when I heard some noise echoing in the cave.

I saw a short flickering light too and knew instantly that the monsters were back. I let out a dry sob and pressed myself against the rocks, wishing nothing more than to be swallowed by the wall. I had realized by now that my hallucinations mostly happened while there was light. The darkness allowed me some reprieve from the hallucinations, if not the memories of the roasted man.

I closed my eyes tightly. I didn't want to hear or see my friends being killed again.

Even though I was terrified, I tried to listen to the discussion I could make out. It might have been morbid curiosity, but if they talked about my death I wanted to know. I didn't want to be painfully surprised. If I knew what to expect, maybe the horror of it all would be lessened. I could only hope it would anyway, because I couldn't hope for anything else anymore. And if I was hearing the dwarves' voices again, the small joy it would bring would help me for a minute before the nightmare started again.

It took me a few minutes to realize that I wasn't hearing the monsters.

There were voices, but they weren't as heavily accented as the three monsters' horrible speech had been.

My heart started to hammer against my ribs as thoughts crossed my mind. Was I hallucinating again? That was the most logical possibility. Hunger, thirst, exhaustion and pain had finally won over my sanity. Being bound and left alone in the dark for days probably hadn't helped either. I was mad and hearing voices of old friends. They were talking in my mind. I knew it. I had realized it awhile ago. But I still couldn't help but hope I wasn't. I couldn't help but hope that this time maybe it would be real. Maybe the dwarves would be there, maybe they would manage to open the cave, maybe they would save me.

But as soon as I thought that I knew it was nothing but a terrible hallucination.

My hopes were crushed almost instantly by what little logic my brain was still able to provide.

The knowledge that I had lost my mind wasn't as painful as the certainty I was about to witness my friends' death again. I started to weep. I wasn't making too much noise though; I didn't want to remind the monsters of my presence if by chance they had forgotten me. Still, I was so far gone that I kept my mind focused on the discussions I was imagining. There was something about a shovel and Nori. This was different. My brain wasn't only recreating the same events ever and ever again. I wasn't sure what I could expect right now, so I kept listening silently. I could only hope that this hallucination would allow me to somehow escape the cruel reality of my situation.

They kept talking about some gold. Then something about weapons that were the finest… and then I hiccupped when I heard Nori's strangled voice.

"Wait! … this dagger!" He suddenly exclaimed.

There was a short second of complete silence before I heard another, shocked voice.

"What? Impossible!" That was Bofur, as usual my friend was present in the hallucination.

"It cannot be…" Nori's voice rang loud and clear in my mind.

There was rummaging noise around, clanking sounds and metal clattering loudly. I heard the voices almost yelling at each others, arguing over whether or not it was possible. There was an unknown voice too that was asking questions that remained largely unanswered. I frowned and stopped to breath for a second. Could I be imagining things like that too? Could my brain create an unknown voice? Probably…

"Here!" Bofur said. "That's…no, that can't be. Nori…That's…" His voice seemed completely broken.

"No. Mahal, no!" I had never heard Nori's voice sounding quite so terrified, so hurt. "How…why?"

It pained my heart to hear that, yet I wondered why I would chose to imagine something so different yet so painful. Was it the guilt I felt? I could barely breathe as I imagined Nori's pained face. He probably would react that way when he would realize I wasn't in Thorin's Halls. Would he hate me for leaving? Would he hate me for abandoning him?

I hated myself too.

I was frozen, broken from pain. My eyes were unseeing until I realized that the light was brighter, as if it was coming closer, and fear overtook me again. Panic froze my lungs for a minute as I held my breath. The beasts were back. And if not, I was quite certain that my hallucination would soon turn into some violent repeat of the previous ones. My shivers were strong and I feared I was making too much noise. The beasts would kill me. The hallucination would show me Nori's death again.

They would roast me alive and eat me. My heart will break again.

One or the other would happen and I didn't care.

I whimpered loudly and started to sob once more. I was unable to remain silent for a second more. I just couldn't keep the panic and pain at bay anymore.

"Here!" A booming voice said while I closed my eyes and pressed myself in a tight ball against the furthest wall.

I didn't even startle with the sudden, loud noise. I didn't have the strength to do so anymore. This had happened too many times already.

"Mahal…" The same voice whispered before bellowing. "Nori! She's there! She's alive!"

"Who is she? How do you know her?"

I blinked right then. I turned my head so quickly that I thought for a second I would get a whiplash, but I didn't care much as my eyes widened.

There, on the other side of the bones' bars, the King stood with an old looking man. How could my brain create such a detailed person? The King shook the bars but they didn't budge. Suddenly my brain started to kick in, adrenaline rushing for one last time in my veins and I whimpered before I opened my mouth and croaked out.

"Please go…monsters…eat…" I couldn't recognize my voice and it hurt to talk but I had to tell them. I couldn't bear witness them die like this. Not again. "Please leave."

I tried to plead but my voice was so weak, and it was so painful to speak, that I was obviously not being clear enough for them. It didn't stop me from trying though. Even though this illusion would probably not be influenced by my input, I still had to try. Even in a dream I needed to do everything in my power to try and save them.

Then Nori appeared. His eyes were open wide as he looked at me and it hurt more than anything I had ever experienced to think of him being killed by those monsters. Every time the pain was fresh in my heart. Every time it felt as if someone was tearing my chest open. He looked properly horrified to see me and, to be honest, I was horrified to see him here too. Yet it was nothing new.

I closed my eyes, tears running down my cheeks.

I wanted this to end.

I just wanted it all to end.

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><p><strong>AN Oh my... this had been a more complicated chapter than I thought. It took me ages to edit it, and to rewrite parts of it. At first I hadn't planned to make Amelia hallucinate quite so much, but HuntressofHope placed the idea in my head and then I just couldn't get it out :P I hope you all liked it!**

**Also, I want to tell you all thank you. I was really overwhelmed by the response to the previous chapter. I am truly glad you liked it. It was one of the chapters I wrote earlier on. (Half of it was actually written right when I started to update this fic on ffnet...so as you can see, it's been awhile). Actually, if some parts of it seem familiar...well I can only say that it was on purpose :D and yes, the timeline is now back to the beginning of chapter 1 (remember, all those 41 chapters were just a huge flashback... -_- )**

**I know that the updates are rather erratic recently and I can only apologize yet again. Just know that those chapters are strangely much harder to write and much longer too. Don't expect to have chapters as long as the previous one often :P **

**I can't say when the next chapter will be posted. Hopefully sometime between next week and the week after.**

**Thanks a lot for your support!**


	43. The Charming and Polite Side of Dwarves

**It all belongs to JRRTolkien except for the OC and the weird parts of the plot**

**Thanks Huntress for your support.**

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><p>Everything that was happening felt a bit surreal.<p>

The King, Nori and an old man were on the other side of the bars that closed my cage.

I could see them clearly, just like I could see clearly all the previous illusions. But this old man annoyed me. I didn't know him. Was he how my brain pictured the roasted man? I didn't like this idea, but it could very well be true.

I kept staring at them, waiting for the grey hands to appear and smash them around. I didn't want to see that happen again. I couldn't. I couldn't witness that anymore.

Even though I tried to plead endlessly for them to leave, albeit in a very weak and shaky voice, Nori didn't listen. Quickly he started to work on the knots that maintained the bones' door shut. This was new too. Usually he just shook the bars until the monsters appeared. In a matter of minutes he finally managed to open it. I could hear the others talking but I truly didn't pay any attention to it. As soon as he opened the door, Nori ran towards me and knelt in front of me.

Was I still hallucinating? Should I hope? No, no I couldn't hope. But it didn't mean that my eyes couldn't feast on the sight. Seeing him from so close after so long was incredible. I feared what illusions my brain would create to tear him away from me.

"Mizimul" He whispered disbelievingly. "Mizimul"

For a few seconds, his hands hovered over my face. He clearly was hesitating to touch me. I didn't know if his hands were really trembling or if my eyes were starting to fail me too. Then I started to wonder whether or not he would be able to touch me. Could a hallucination be physically felt? I had no idea. If he touched me, did it mean that he was real?

Maybe. Maybe not.

I was so scared to find out.

"Nori…" I squeaked with tears blurring my sight.

He took his dagger out and quickly cut my bounds. I whimpered as my limbs were forced into another position after being bound for days. I was crying weakly as Nori cautiously gathered me in his arms and took me out. My mind was in complete turmoil. I had no way of knowing whether this was another illusion or not. I could very well be dreaming.

I was so light headed, and so weak that I only registered I was out of the cave when I realized the air smelt oddly. Actually it smelt fresh and clean and it made me cough.

"Mahal!" Several voices shouted.

My eyes were half closed and I had trouble to keep my head up. Right now it was lying against Nori's shoulder, my forehead brushing against his beard. I could feel tears against my cheeks but not much else. I was shivering rather strongly. From the corner of my eyes I saw various forms rushing in my direction and instinctively I whimpered and weakly recoiled, pressing my face against Nori's shoulder. I wasn't certain whether or not I was still hallucinating, but even if I was, then Nori was the only one able to reassure me and protect me.

I could feel his arms holding me tightly, though they weren't crushing me painfully. As I whimpered, he pressed me a bit closer to his chest. Then a loud voice bellowed above the others.

"Move away you idiots! Stop crowding her! Nori, you too. Put her down."

"I'm not going anywhere Oin." I heard Nori immediately reply in a low growl.

His voice was so tight that I was certain Oin wouldn't argue. I could feel Nori's arms tighten around me. He held me really close to his chest. It probably should have hurt me but I actually felt better than I had in weeks. I didn't know what was going on, but it felt as if no dwarf came close to me as I was being held by Nori. I barely registered what was going on, but it felt as if every time a voice was coming closer, Nori would move away. I was half conscious until Ori managed to come close enough to give me some water to drink.

"Slowly Amelia. Drink slowly." His kind, slightly shaking voice said.

I felt something press against my cracked lips and I instinctively opened my mouth. Water had never tasted so sweet than it did at that very second. The fresh liquid was reviving me. I coughed and choked a bit at first, but with Ori's help I managed to drink mouthfuls of clear water. When he took it back I sighed and closed my eyes. It would take more than mere seconds for me to feel better but drinking a bit of water was already enough to clear my mind a bit. After what I guessed were several minutes, Ori helped me drink some more. Little by little I started to pay more attention to what was happening. Eyes still closed, I was free to try and concentrate on the sounds around me for a minute.

"We gathered all her stuff I think." Bofur said from afar. "We found back a few things."

"What is she doing here?" That was the King's voice and he clearly was angry.

"Who is she?" I didn't know this one.

"She's our ward. She should be back in the blue mountains." Dori explained shakily and I could tell he was quite close.

"A human?"

I tuned this discussion out as my mind slowly cleared. The water was doing wonders on my health and I dared open my eyes again. I blinked to see Nori staring at me with his grey eyes full of fear and disbelief.

"Hey…" I half whispered half croaked to him.

I realised then that Nori was now sitting on the ground and had gathered me on his lap. He leant and pressed his forehead against mine and I didn't close my eyes. I didn't know whether I was imagining all this, but if I was, my brain was doing an amazing job at recreating Nori's wonderful grey eyes. After a few seconds spent looking in each other eyes, he shifted and whispered near my ear with a pained voice.

"Mizimul, what are you doing here?"

I had to tell him the truth. Even if he was a figment of my imagination, this would be my last chance to tell him why I had died so stupidly. I had trouble forming complete sentences though and I ended up speaking with a hoarse voice.

"Looking for you. Saw a fire. Not you but…but…monsters." I stammered before swallowing thickly. Then I cried out. "They killed him Nori. They killed a man and they are going to kill me too."

I didn't realize that my fists were clutching tightly at Nori's tunic until then. I hid my face against his chest and I was glad to feel his arms strengthen their hold around my waist and shoulders. He let me cry for a short while, holding me tightly before I calmed down a bit. When I opened my eyes, I had to blink several times before I recognized Dori and Ori kneeling just next to us. Balin was standing right behind Dori and basically all the other dwarves were hovering around us in a rather tight circle.

Bombur handed me an apple that I ate slowly; not because I wanted to, but because when he saw me almost jumping on it, Nori held my hand and forced me to slow down. Once I had finished, I was thankful he did that as I could have been sick otherwise. Ori handed me some more water and after a few more minutes spent sipping it slowly, my mind was clearer. At least as clear as it could become without proper rest and nutrition. Now, I had to face the dwarves.

"What in Mahal's name are you doing here?" The King asked with barely controlled anger.

"It is not the time to ask such things." The old man I didn't know said. "We should keep moving."

As soon as he said those words, one of the dwarves shouted something about someone arriving our way. Immediately Nori jumped to his feet after he had pushed me down and I found myself crowded by him and his brothers.

Honestly my reactions were really slow. I was completely out of it. My mind already had difficulties wrapping around the fact that I hadn't found the dwarves but they found me instead. At some point though, I realized that there was this terrible crashing sound that was coming our way. Fear coursed through my veins and I scrambled to my feet, holding against Nori's tunic I spoke as quickly as I could.

"Nori, we have to leave. These are monsters, giants. They'll smash us."

Before he could reply though a huge sleigh busted through the dense foliage and landed near the dwarves. I blinked several times when I realized that rabbits were pulling the thing and that another odd old man was behind. I felt my knees weaken as I let myself fall on the ground in a heap. The dwarves were already moving toward this strange sleigh, only Nori was still behind with me.

It didn't matter one bit though.

I hadn't been saved.

I was just so mad that the hallucinations were too realistic. I was probably shivering from fever in the cage covered of bones. Maybe I was actually roasting around a stick and I just hadn't realized it yet.

It was Nori's hands against my cheeks that forced me to look up. I met his grey eyes full of emotions, among which concern and worry were the strongest.

"Amelia, look at me. Look at me." His voice was so kind, so caring, that I couldn't stop tears from pooling in my eyes.

"Nori…I think I'm mad." I whispered.

The pain on his face made my chest tighten. I felt his thumbs brush my cheekbones before he leant closer and pressed a kiss on my forehead. He lingered there for a second and I closed my eyes. Warmth pooled in my chest.

"You're not mad Umzam." His murmur was barely audible. "We're here. I'm here. I'll protect you."

"The monsters…"

"They were trolls. They're dead. We killed them last night."

I looked up at him and, even though I couldn't fathom how they managed to do that, I knew I could trust him. For a second I lost myself completely in Nori's eyes. Then someone cleared his throat and I was forced to look away. The sight wasn't so bad, as the person who had interrupted us was Dori.

"Dori" I breathed out.

And then, just like that, my mind seemed to clear a bit more. I looked around and saw the others that were standing nearby. Closest to me and Nori, there was Ori and Dori who were holding my belongings, and then there were Balin and Oin. The healer was frowning at Nori. The others were a bit further away.

"Amelia, you should put on your clothes and shoes back." Dori said while handing the items to me.

I could tell easily that these weren't the words he wanted to pronounce. I wasn't sure whether he wanted to yell at me or smother me in a tight hug. Instead of asking, I extended shaky arms and took my boots, tunics and leather coat.

"I should check you're not too hurt." Oin's grumpy voice said while I was putting on my tunic. "You obviously took a nasty blow to the head."

I looked up at him and blurted out the first words that came through my mind.

"No, I just hit a bush."

After I said that I occupied myself with lacing my leather coat. I wasn't paying attention to the silent dwarves around me.

"You…hit a bush…" Ori repeated uncertainly.

"Well, the monster hit me and I hit a bush."

Alright. Maybe my mind wasn't that clear, because it sounded weird even to me. I tilted my head and tried to rub my forehead, only to feel something weird under my fingers. It took me seeing the odd, brownish dirt to realize it was actually dried blood. I probably looked rather beat up. Well at least that explained partly why all the dwarves around me were clearly freaking out.

"Why…how…"

I didn't pay attention as I quickly put my shoes back on.

"It doesn't matter right now." Dori interrupted Ori and gestured to Oin to come close.

"Amelia. Where does it hurt?" The old healer asked me.

I tried to concentrate for a second. It was quite difficult to formulate coherent thoughts in my mind, and putting them into sentences was an achievement.

"Erm…"

I didn't have the time to answer though as I heard shouts and a loud growl. Before I could understand anything of what was happening, I was pulled back on my feet and thrown on Dori's shoulder. I squeaked as the voices around were talking a bit too fast for me to follow. I only had the time to catch sight of a huge and frightening animal that looked like a wolf before Dori started to run away.

It was most uncomfortable to bounce on his shoulder like a bag of potatoes. But I kept my mouth shut as I glimpsed at the worried faces of the dwarves around. It didn't take a genius to gather that we were running away from something. I started to feel afraid once more. I also started quite quickly to feel dizzy and it became my priority to think about anything that would help me keep that apple in my stomach.

I had no idea how long Dori ran, but when he stopped and let me down, I was pushed behind him and Nori against a large rock. I bit my lower lip to avoid squeaking when I felt crushed between their backs and the hard rock behind mine.

Thank Mahal my mind was clear enough to order my mouth to shut up because the next thing I knew another huge wolf-like animal was being smashed into a pulp by Dwalin and Bofur. As soon as I realized that, I felt Dori's hands on my waist and in a short second I was thrown back on his shoulder as he sprinted away.

This time though, I pushed myself up in order to have a look at what was chasing us. From afar I could only see some huge hounds. Some of those were mounted but I couldn't see clearly what these men looked like. All around Dori the dwarves were dashing away. I didn't have to look for long before I found Nori, who was running close to his older brother, and Ori, who was slightly behind.

I couldn't stop a small yelp when Dori brutally stopped and let me down, or rather, threw me down.

"Amelia, stay behind us!" He quickly ordered before shoving me behind his back.

I almost fell down but managed to catch myself against a rock. I looked around. The dwarves were all in a large circle and I was more or less in the middle. The wolves and men mounting them were slowly starting to come closer. We were encircled. Something told me that the situation was really bad right then.

I swallowed thickly and instinctively took a step back.

Well, I tried to at least. But instead of concrete, rocky ground, my foot met with air and I tumbled down a large hole. I rolled down a small slope and only stopped at the feet of the same weird, old looking man I had seen before.

I blinked and tried to clear my brain, but this fall hadn't really been helpful. I could feel fresh pain blossom from various spots in my body.

"Where are the others?" The old man asked me at the same time as I heard a voice, Nori's, bellow my name.

"Up there." I breathed out and tried to go back to my feet and climb back up the slope.

"Stay here, you fool." The man said, literally grabbing me by my collar and forcing me down.

"But…" I tried to protest before the man climbed back up quickly.

My legs were too weak and I stumbled back to the ground. I had absolutely no idea what was going on. I couldn't understand the trail of events that had lead me here. One minute I remembered sitting on the ground in the night, looking at Harràs, the next I was down a hole with a tall, old man ordering me around. Nothing made sense. I managed to stand back up only when the first dwarf glided down the slope, quickly followed by others. Nori was almost immediately next to me, with Dori and Ori hovering nearby too. They quickly helped me to stand back up and pushed me a bit further away from the slope.

It was maybe shameful, but I was glad and relieved when I felt Nori's arm around my shoulder. Almost immediately I leant against him. I didn't really realize it, but Nori was clearly supporting me. My legs were weak and shaky. My mind was still fuzzy. I looked at the dwarves and some of them observed me too.

They didn't have the time to say anything though because the King arrived then and almost at the same moment, a large dark shape fell down the slope.

I hiccupped loudly when I saw it and grabbed Nori's arm without realizing it.

"Wh…what's this?" I breathed out.

No one said a word as they had all jumped when it fell. The King grabbed something from the weird and freaky corpse after a few seconds.

"Elves" He grunted.

"This is an elf?" I couldn't help but exclaim as I looked at the disgusting and scary looking creature on the ground.

It was huge. But more importantly it was dark skinned, but not a natural dark…more like a dirty, muddy and oily colour that seemed to leak from its skin. The skin colour underneath was a sort of sickly grey. The face was deformed by a grimace that let me see the pointy teeth and the bluish tongue. Its eyes were open on dark pupils that seemed to stare at me. I gulped and was already starting to shudder when Dori's voice forced my eyes away from the creature.

"Amelia, this is an orc."

An orc? Alright, that made more sense. My brain was still busy registering what an orc was supposed to look like while the dwarves were talking and grumbling around me. I nodded absentmindedly before I was suddenly rushed away from the creature through a small path.

Everything was going too fast.

I could understand why no one was stopping to explain the situation though. Those orcs really didn't look friendly and I didn't want to meet a breathing one. I was stumbling behind Dori while Nori's hands were carefully guiding me, helping me to keep some balance as my legs were still very weak. One of his hands was on my waist and it somehow reassured me to feel it. I concentrated on Dori's back. I didn't try to understand what was going on or where we were going. For now I was with the dwarves and that was all that mattered to me.

After a while we finally exited the small pathway and we arrived on some sort of natural balcony that opened on the mountain. Facing us was a valley encircled by high mountains with peaceful looking forests and waterfalls. Nested in the middle of the gorgeous scenery I could clearly distinguish some buildings that looked like they were a part of the place, and not as if they had been added afterwards.

It was breathtaking.

I took a few steps forwards before Nori's hand stopped me. Only then did I realize how close to the edge I was. I stepped back and bumped against Nori's chest. Instead of moving away though, I let my head fall back against his shoulder. I felt one of his arms snake around my waist and he held me close to him. I turned my head slightly, my nose brushing against his braided beard.

"Nori" I whispered. "Am I truly awake? Are you truly here?"

I couldn't help but fear that I was somehow still in the hole with the monsters ready to eat me.

"I'm here Mizimul, don't worry."

The soft murmur sent a shiver down my spine. His arm tightened around me and I sighed. Whether I was awake or not, I suddenly didn't care. Because if this was to be my last dream before my death, then I should be grateful my last moments would somehow include Nori and the others.

I didn't let go of Nori's arm when we walked down toward the valley. I was stumbling and had troubles simply walking. The apple given by the dwarves was not enough to give me energy after several days. My stomach was still clenching painfully. My head was pounding. My whole body felt too heavy to move. Each step was a struggle. But that was nothing compared to the sudden fear I felt when we had to cross a narrow bridge. A very narrow bridge.

Nori probably felt my hesitation because he turned to face me before we stepped on it.

"Do you want me to carry you?"

It took all my courage to say no, but I still had to follow the dwarves. The thought that I could die stupidly by falling down the bridge was enough to give me the will to cross it quickly. I couldn't help but breathe in relief when we stepped on the other side though. The dwarves gathered in the middle of some sort of small place. For my part, the sight was too enthralling and I walked a bit aside. From the corner of my eye I saw that the dwarves were all gathered together as I took a few steps away. They seemed rather focused on their surroundings and obviously didn't realize that I was wandering aimlessly and absentmindedly.

It honestly wasn't a conscious thought that made me leave Nori's side. I just couldn't help it.

The buildings I could see were majestic. It gave a feeling of light and the open arcs that criss-crossed were breathtaking and full of magnificently carved details. It was like a dream. Reality couldn't possibly be quite like that. Doubt rose again in my foggy brain. I was busy trying to figure out whether I was hallucinating or not when some noise caught my attention. I turned around as I heard voices in my back. I hadn't realized how far I had walked away from the group until a thundering noise made my heart beat faster. Instinctively I hid behind the nearest pillar, which actually was a statue of some tall man, and only peered around when the sound lowered down.

The dwarves were now surrounded by horses and men.

Clearly the hit on my head and the lack of proper nutrition for the past days had a worse effect on my mind than any of us could have guessed. Instead of staying hidden, like any relatively sane person would have done while the dwarves were clearly on the defensive, I stumbled out of my hiding place and crashed flat on the ground.

It hurt.

I didn't know whether my body or my pride hurt most though.

But the worst part wasn't that I had fallen so stupidly. No. The worst part was that I remained motionless for long silent seconds. Then I started to shakily try to stand. I was pathetic until helpful hands kindly helped me. In a matter of seconds, I was protected by Dori and Nori and more or less pushed back in the dwarves' direction. Nori's arm was around my waist and Dori had his right hand on my shoulder.

"And who's this?"

I blinked when I heard the voice. It was rather unlike any I had heard before. It was somehow melodious and light, which weren't words anyone should use to describe a voice. Immediately after that person spoke, Nori's hold strengthened protectively on my waist and a gruff voice I knew well rudely answered.

"No one you should concern yourself with."

Thanks my King…

It took me a good minute to gather my wits and find some balance. I was leaning heavily on Nori when I finally looked up to glimpse at those men.

As soon as my eyes found one of them, I gasped and felt my mouth open widely. My eyes were riveted on him.

His face was flawless. His eyes shone with something I could only call wisdom and kindness. His long dark hair fell on his shoulders and I could see some sort of finely crafted circlet on his head. Clearly this was not a man.

He was beautiful.

Not handsome. Beautiful.

Looking at him my brain somehow provided me with the memory of an old discussion I once had with Ori. I couldn't detach my eyes from him. It was as if his mere presence commanded my attention. I had to look at him.

"Are you one of the Valar?" I blurted out, eyes wide as the definitely not human person smiled kindly at me.

There was immediately a heavy silence that surrounded me. Then very melodious chuckles and kind smiles popped out of the beautiful creatures while disbelieving and angry grunts came out of my dear dwarves. It was hard to tear my eyes away from those perfect persons, but I had to look at my friends.

Their expressions ranged from disbelief to utter disgust.

Nori clearly hesitated between those and he was looking at me with more than a bit of concern too. Dori was covering his eyes with one of his hands and Balin shook his head at me. I could hear Gloin grumble and Dwalin grunt something as my eyes saw that the King really wasn't pleased, he looked furious actually. I averted my gaze quickly. Fili and Kili were gaping in disbelief at my question and the only other dwarf I could see, Ori, seemed rather nervous.

"Amelia…" He cleared his throat. "They're…erm…they're not…" He stammered before the melodious voice interrupted him.

"We're elves young lady."

Elves?

No way.

Where were the tiny little creatures helping Santa?

It was only when Nori caught my hand and brought it back down that I realized I had extended it toward the elf that clearly was some sort of important figure here. Apparently, poking him was out of the question. I was about to say something when Gloin spoke gruffly.

"Clearly the lass hit her head. She's not thinking straight."

"I can see to it that she's treated by one of our healers." The elf offered politely, gesturing to another amazing creature next to him.

"We've got our own healers." The King rudely retorted.

"Lord Elrond is our host and offers his help. Surely you wouldn't refuse." The old man snapped at the King.

I still had no idea who this weird bearded man was, but he was either strong or stupid to talk like this to our King. My fragile thoughts shattered as noise erupted around me. All the dwarves complained and clearly refused to let me leave their sight. Among those who complained the most, of course, there were the three brothers.

I suddenly whimpered and strongly grabbed Nori's tunic.

"Nori…I…"

The noise, my overall dizziness and exhaustion all combined made my head pound.

Rather suddenly my knees gave out under me and, hadn't it been for Nori's strong grip on my waist, I would have fallen once more. I blinked rapidly to try and clear the black dots that clouded my vision, but it didn't really work and I soon lost consciousness.

* * *

><p>I awoke with a violent jolt and immediately shot up from my lying position. As soon as I sat, blood rushed to my head and I felt dizzy. I closed my eyes to fight down the waves of nausea that hit me. Under my clenched fists I could feel soft sheets, but as my brain registered that, I didn't pay much attention to it. Strong hands gently pushed on my shoulders and I obeyed the silent order and lay back down.<p>

The pillow under my head was fluffy and the mattress was soft. It was how I imagined it would feel like to sleep in a cottony cloud. The air was clean, fresh, with an herbal sent that immediately made me feel better, safe, as if I was back in the healing wards. I hoped for a minute that all this had only been a nightmare. Maybe I would wake up facing Oin after having hit my head somewhere, but I doubted it. Beds weren't that soft and comfortable in the Halls. I sighed and let my eyes slowly flutter open. They adjusted to the soft light and almost immediately met the grey gaze I had missed so much in the past weeks.

Nori was right next to my bed, his eyes paying attention to my every move.

He seemed relieved but I could tell that he was feeling many conflicting emotions right then. Probably just like I was.

His hands were still on my shoulders and instinctively I brought mine to his. My fingers were colder than his as I grazed his skin. Holding his hands I sighed in relief. The clouds that had blurred my mind were gone. I was finally able to think straight again. I wasn't dreaming. I couldn't be. He squeezed my hands a bit and leant forward to press his forehead against mine.

"Mizimul"

We both closed our eyes and I let myself drown for a second in the warm and happy feelings I felt. I had found him back. Well, probably not in the way I had hoped I'd found him, but still. I was with Nori and that was all that mattered. The memories of monsters and orcs were foggy at best right now and didn't matter at all.

"Nori" I whispered softly squeezing his hands in mine.

A few minutes stretched while we remained like this, our foreheads touching and our eyes closed.

But the peaceful moment had to be broken at some point. Nori sat back as I opened my eyes and his gaze was sterner than it had been.

"How are you feeling?" He asked first, clearly concerned.

I took a second, expecting to suddenly realize how much my limbs ached or how weak and light headed I felt. But nothing came. If anything I was a bit tired and sore, but other than that I felt perfectly fine. I let go of his right hand and gingerly touched my head, were I knew I had a wound, but aside from a slight piece of soft fabric I didn't feel anything under my fingers and no pain disturbed me.

"I'm fine. A bit tired but that's it."

He nodded before his gaze grew sterner still.

"Amelia, what happened? What were you doing so far away from the Halls? Was someone else with you?"

It probably was only natural that he would ask me so many questions. I knew I had a few bones to pick with him too, but right now I could understand that I had some explaining to do first.

"I was alone, well, with my horse Harràs. I was sent to follow you, or try to at least. I know it was stupid." I added before he could say it and chose to continue the story. "One night, I saw firelight and I thought it might be you so I went to see. I ended up facing those three monsters." I shivered when I recalled the events and Nori squeezed my hands a bit tighter. "I tried to run away but they were faster and I couldn't fight them. They caught me but I don't remember much after that. Everything is unclear. Then I remember you and the others and…the running and…and meeting elves."

Nori sighed loudly and shook his head. I could feel that his hand was slightly shaking.

"We don't have time to discuss this." He said in a low tone. "But don't even think that anyone will be happy to hear this tale. One of those elves is going to arrive soon. They healed you. We arrived earlier this morning and now we're invited for lunch." He snorted derisively at that and I didn't know why.

He clearly expected me to be scolded for my stupidity, whether it would be by him or another dwarf was unclear. Somehow I felt a spark of anger revive in me and I looked at him sternly too.

"Oh, don't think for a second that I don't have things to settle with you all." I said calmly.

He had the decency to look away at this point.

"Mizimul, this was madness. Surely you…" He started but I interrupted him.

"I perfectly know how stupid and useless it was. But Nori, if you believe that I won't have a few words to say about your behaviour, then you're sadly mistaken."

We glared at one another until I heard a door open.

My gaze immediately fell on one of those magnificent creatures, an elf, and my anger disappeared.

He had long dark hair and an angular and finely defined face. His blue eyes were the colour of a summer sky. I held my breath for a second when I saw him. How could someone be so beautiful? It was inhuman.

"Master dwarf" He nodded towards Nori before looking at me. "My lady, I hope you are feeling better."

I was hypnotized by his melodious voice for a second and I had to mentally shake myself in order to answer. I heard Nori grunt but I ignored him.

"I'm much better. Thank you for your help, it was most kind."

I didn't have to look at Nori to know he was frowning deeply. His low groan was enough of an indication on his mood. The elf didn't seem to pay attention to it though, and he smiled at me kindly. My heart fluttered a bit and I could feel heat in my cheeks. I averted my eyes, suddenly feeling shy only to see Nori staring angrily at the elf. I didn't have the time to think about it though, as our kind guide spoke some more.

"I am glad to hear your health improved." He said kindly. "I am here to escort you back to your friends if you so wish. Lunch will be served shortly."

Looking at him, I smiled back and nodded.

"Thank you for your help."

I sat with Nori's help and tentatively tried to stand. I was expecting to feel dizzy, but aside from weaker legs than usual, I was perfectly fine. Nori hadn't said a word and kept his suspicious eyes on the elf, who did his best to ignore him. I honestly didn't understand why Nori was behaving this way. After all, the elves had helped us, well me.

I took a few shaky steps. Nori was hovering near me, his hands inches away from my shoulders, ready to catch me. Everything seemed alright and I smiled softly at him. I saw his eyes immediately soften and we were soon following the elf outside.

I stopped as I crossed the threshold and my eyes widened.

The dwarves Halls had been impressive in their own rights, but this was breathtaking.

There was light and vegetation, water trickling here and there from streams into fountains carved magnificently in stone. Buildings and nature just seemed to be mixed together in an intricate pattern that seemed natural, harmonious even. Statues beautifully carved seemed almost alive and the high ceilings were pieces of art. I gaped at the sight.

There was also an immediate and intense feeling of peace, of home, that welled in my heart and I felt a genuine smile on my lips as my eyes took in the wonderful sight.

Kindly, the elf waited for me to look around, but I could tell that Nori wasn't happy by my sudden enthusiasm for this city. He gently but insistently pushed me to force me to move. I glared at him and immediately saw how grumpy he was, but I ignored it. Turning to look at our escort, I smiled and apologized.

"I'm sorry, but this place is… it's unlike anything I've seen before."

The elf smiled and gestured for us to follow him.

"Rivendell is the name of our home in the common tongue." The elf told me. "Its beauty is renowned in these parts of the world. You'd be safe here my lady."

"Please, you can call me Amelia." I ignored Nori's low grumbling and concentrated on being polite with our kind guide.

I truly didn't understand why Nori was acting this way. He was being rude. I didn't like it at all. These people, these elves, were being really nice from what I could tell. The elf nodded before he replied.

"You might call me Lindir. I am Lord Elrond's Chamberlain."

"Is Lord Elrond your King?" I asked, both curious and worried to meet yet another King similar to our own.

"Lord Elrond isn't our King. But he's the Lord of this place. Imladris we call it in our language."

Clearly, Lindir didn't mind answering my questions and I soon completely ignored the grumpy dwarf that kept on mumbling next to me and concentrated instead on the kind elf.

"I am sorry to ask this, but I think you said you were elves?" I blushed a bit as Lindir chuckled.

"Had you never seen or heard of elves before?"

It was evident in his tone that he wasn't mocking me in a mean way, so I didn't feel embarrassed at all. On the contrary I felt almost immediately at ease here, in Rivendell with this elf. It was odd, but I felt almost at home.

"Please don't be offended by my lack of knowledge. I had never seen a dwarf before I met those of Thorin's Halls."

"Really?" Lindir seemed genuinely surprised. "I never heard of a human being allowed in their Halls, it is most surprising. Were you young when you met them?"

Clearly Nori didn't like the fact that we spoke of dwarves in front of him.

"It doesn't concern you." He rudely snapped at Lindir and I stared at him completely bewildered by his behaviour.

Lindir didn't reply to that. I frowned but chose not to speak my mind to Nori in front of Lindir. Instead I cleared my throat and tried to change topics.

"I'm a bit surprised to be feeling already so much better. Nori told me I didn't stay unconscious for long?"

"Over the ages my people have gathered a lot of knowledge. Healing wounds as minor as those you suffered was no trouble at all. One of our apprentices healed you quickly."

"Do you have many apprentices?" I wondered.

"Currently there are three of them." He replied kindly with a smile.

Either there were many more elves than dwarves, or they were more interested in healing. I was a bit surprised to hear that there were three apprentices here right now. Hadn't I appeared from nowhere, I doubted that Oin would have had one. I was genuinely curious to find out more about this.

"So the elves know a lot about medicine? I mean, healing?"

"You could say that." Lindir smiled again before adding. "You seem curious about this topic."

Nori grumbled something about it not being his business, but once more I ignored him completely and smiled broadly to the elf.

"I'm a healer myself." I replied. "I still have a lot to learn though."

"If you wish, I could ask Lord Elrond whether it would be alright for you to have access to one of our libraries."

I felt myself blush terribly and I averted my gaze. I didn't want to say aloud that I didn't know how to read the languages of this world. It might be stupid, but I felt ashamed at the thought that I was illiterate here.

Nori glared at Lindir and groaned louder than before.

"We won't stay long. Don't bother yourself."

I didn't have the time to reply as Lindir sighed and stopped in front of large doors.

"Here we are Master Dwarf, Amelia. I hope you'll enjoy your lunch. The healers said you should try and not eat too much yet Amelia, but I guess you knew that already."

"Thank you Lindir." I smiled at him before I was pushed away by Nori.

"What's the matter with you?" I whispered angrily at him as he forced me away from the kind elf.

"I should be the one asking you that!" He growled back angrily.

We glared at each other until we stepped on a large balcony were several tables were set. Most of the dwarves were here and I could easily tell that they weren't happy. They were glaring or eyeing their surroundings suspiciously. I rolled my eyes, annoyed at their rude behaviour. I really couldn't picture the elves as enemies, even though I objectively didn't know them.

"Amelia!"

I turned around just in time to be engulfed in Ori's arms.

I smiled and hugged him tightly. I was really happy to see him, and glad that he was alright. I didn't pay attention to the mumbles around us. I knew that as soon as we would have the time, I would have to face those thirteen dwarves in a yelling match. I didn't like it, but I wouldn't have much choice. I guessed we all had reasons to be angry at each other. I quickly glanced above Ori's shoulder and met with Dori's eyes.

He was looking at me both sternly and kindly. I didn't know it would have been possible but the old dwarf apparently had mastered the ambiguous gaze after decades spent dealing with Nori. Still he approached us and soon I was crushed in a group hug with him and Ori.

"I'm so glad you're alright." Ori told me with a strangled voice.

"I'm fine, don't worry." I tried to reassure him.

"Amelia, why did you leave the safety of the Halls?" Dori asked, his tone indicating it was a reprimand.

"I…" I opened my mouth to retort when Balin intervened.

The usually kind old dwarf didn't even look at me as he spoke directly to Dori. More than anything, this behaviour told me that my second guardian was just as angry at me as the other.

"We'll discuss this later." He said calmly but I knew I shouldn't even try to contradict him now.

Obviously he wasn't going to be an ally if his stern frown and cold behaviour were anything to go by.

I squared my shoulder and finally met his eyes without flinching as he glanced at me. I shouldn't be afraid of any of them. After all, I had a few arguments they wouldn't be able to complain about. Before I could say anything though, Dori turned towards Nori and grunted.

"Where were you?"

"I sneaked in their healing wards." Nori replied in an annoyed tone. "I thought you would appreciate Amelia not being left alone there."

Dori narrowed his eyes at Nori but before I could even think to intervene, he muttered something I couldn't hear but that made Nori tense.

Ori and Dori then wordlessly guided me to a table and forced me to sit between them. I could see how tense they were. Dori especially. He glared at the elves around while Ori was observing them, distrust obvious on his usually kind face. Glancing quickly around I realized two things; first the dwarves, without exception for those I could see, were angry at me. Second they were behaving as if we were in the middle of a trap and they were expecting an attack at any moment.

I frowned and looked at the elves.

They seemed completely peaceful, though a bit tense too.

My eyes widened when I saw that there were musicians who were about to start playing. There were women with them. They were all so beautiful. Actually everything around me was magnificent, delicate, beautiful…well, everything except for the dwarves. I didn't know where to look, there were too many things that caught my eyes. I knew I somehow behaved like a child in a toy or sweet factory, but in all honesty everything was simply amazing. The statues especially fascinated me, they were so life like that it was almost scary, yet I couldn't find it in myself to be afraid of anything here. I was at peace.

Each elf that met my eyes smiled kindly at me, though I quickly noticed that their smiles were only directed at me and that each time they looked at the dwarves their faces were politely emotionless.

Something odd was going on.

Still I didn't think that asking aloud what was happening would have been smart at that moment.

I heard some voices and saw the old man from earlier, an elf and our King walking past us to a smaller table. The King glared at me as he walked by and I averted my gaze. Now wasn't the time to give Dís' message to him.

Most of the dwarves were studiously ignoring me. I let my gaze trail quickly on them, noticing that some child was apparently invited too, but decided to pay the dwarves no mind. If they were so angry that they couldn't speak with me, then there was nothing I could do at the moment. Actually, only Ori was kind enough to smile timidly at me. Apparently I was being punished for the crime of doing the exact same thing they had done; running in the wild.

I shrugged and looked up when elves brought large plates of food. I didn't look at it but thanked the elves first. They all smiled kindly and when my gaze turned to the dwarves I saw that the glares directed towards me were slightly sterner. I sighed. I had the ominous feeling that this day was going to be very long and very tiring.

And then problems started.

I for one was happy to see the menu. I hadn't eaten so many vegetables in quite awhile and I happily placed the food on my plate. Complains started to rise almost immediately from my friends though.

"Where's the meat?" I heard Dwalin repeat several times between groans.

Ori's face was almost as green as the cabbage in his plate. Dori tried to encourage him, leaning behind me to talk to his brother. I ignored it all and ate happily, though I paid attention not to eat too much in quantity. Each slow bite was torture, I wanted to just eat about anything I could. Alas, soon I started to feel a bit dizzy and had to stop altogether.

Looking at my intertwined fingers on my lap, I wondered how long I had stayed with the monsters.

If I were entirely honest, I would admit that I felt a bit sad right now. Well, more than a bit sad actually. Of course our meeting hadn't been ideal, but I felt estranged in the group of dwarves I thought I knew well. Even Dori was giving me the cold shoulder treatment. I glared at my plate, refusing to look at any of them when I suddenly heard a commotion. Looking up I saw Bofur standing on a small table in the middle of our group.

I felt the blood drain from my face.

The elves had been kind. They had been playing a soft melodious tune which I had enjoyed. They clearly behaved in entirely different ways than those of the dwarves. I would bet everything I had that they usually didn't step on their tables during lunch and probably wouldn't participate in loud food fights.

Surely what I dreaded wouldn't happen.

I looked with wide eyes at Bofur as he started to sing loudly. The elves were obviously surprised, and not in a good way. I couldn't blame them. Having someone sing while standing on top of the table during meal time was definitely something not everyone would enjoy. My embarrassment was nothing though until the first dwarf threw some pastry in the air. I closed my eyes and hid my face in my hands when the food fight started. I was embarrassed, and for once it wasn't because of something I had done. No, it was the people I was with who embarrassed me terribly.

I sighed.

My face was probably quite red right then. I could feel the heat in my cheeks.

Suddenly, I felt very tired.

I had been through quite a lot recently and I just didn't want to deal with the shame I felt at seeing my friends behave like this. As they were all too busy making a mess of the previously beautiful balcony we were on, I stood up silently.

All the dwarves were looking at Bofur, yelling, singing along and throwing food at him and around. None of them saw me as I gave a tiny, apologizing smile to one bewildered elf and quickly scurried away.

As soon as I stepped out of the balcony and back in one of the long corridors I started to walk as fast and as far away as possible.

I loved those dwarves.

I was in love with one of them.

But their behaviour greatly disturbed me.

Damn it, but if I could, I would have yelled at them to stop and be a bit more respectful towards the friendly elves.

I hated that they made me feel as if I had committed a crime in following them. I hated how they dared glare at me as if I was a mere child who had done something stupid. I was adult enough to admit that my plan had been terrible, but I didn't deserve to be glared at in such a way. Besides, most of them had simply no right to comment on my behaviour. I would accept critics from Dori, Nori, Ori and Balin. Well, maybe from the King too, but the others were just friends. Of course Oin and Gloin would as well have things to say, but as for the others, they just had no rights.

As I walked aimlessly from corridors to balconies I felt my anger spark and finally burn in my chest. The feelings I had when I left Thorin's Halls hadn't disappeared. The fear and pain had just dissimulated them. I was especially angry with the three brothers. Of course I was grateful for their rescue, but it wasn't an excuse for abandoning me.

I wasn't really paying attention to where I was, or where I went. Little by little I went further and further away into the gardens, leaving the beautifully decorated corridors behind. Here and there I could still see statues but they were now hidden below trees or in the middle of flower bushes.

After awhile I found myself near a small pond. Looking around I realized I was in a small, hidden garden with rose bushes encircling it almost completely except for the small passage I had come through. It seemed a wonder that I had found this place at all. The grass was soft as I leant to caress it with my fingertips. There were many flowers around and a tall weeping willow at the extremity of the pond. Its thin branches created a green curtain that grazed the grass and water. This was probably the ideal spot to hide and think for awhile.

I looked at the grass and, answering to a sudden urge, I removed my boots and walked barefooted to the tree. Carefully parting its branches I smiled when I saw a wooden bench near its trunk.

The bench was beautifully crafted and I spent several minutes letting my fingers run on the smooth surface before I lay on it. As soon as my back was flat against the wood, I let out a long sigh and closed my eyes.

I felt entirely safe here.

No one could see me.

There was no threat.

An intense feeling of peace grew in my heart.

For a moment, time seemed to stop. Everything seemed to fade. Nothing was important anymore.

Then an odd melancholy forced tears in my eyes. I felt one roll on my cheek. Absentmindedly I brushed it away and my fingers stayed on the scar I now had on my left cheek. It wasn't an ugly scar, but it was still there. A sudden feeling of unease made me frown as I rolled to my side, tucking my hands under my head, my eyes fixed on the branches that grazed the water.

So many things had happened.

I had believed so strongly that I belonged with the dwarves. Still at this moment I wondered whether I truly did or not. A heavy weight constricted my chest and hindered my breathing. Silently I started to cry. I didn't truly know why I was crying, or why the dwarves' behaviour with the elves bothered me so much. It felt good to cry though and as I was alone, I felt free to do so.

The sun could barely filter under the curtain of branches but I didn't feel cold or hot. As my tears fell on the ground and disappeared there, I slowly started to feel the weight melt away. I knew more or less what had me feel so sad. It probably was the dwarves. It always was the dwarves. They managed to both make me feel incredibly happy and incredibly sad. It was a feat in its own right.

I was somehow disappointed in them.

I was angry at them.

I felt ashamed that they had to save me in that way.

Many conflicting emotions whirled in my chest and the tears were just what I needed to let some of it out.

After awhile I calmed down and just remained there, emotionless, while my mind wandered. I didn't actually think about anything in particular. Thoughts passed through my mind without me stopping any of them. It was only when I heard a soft noise nearby that I awoke from this odd contemplative state.

My eyes that had been riveted on the tree's branches, hypnotized by their movements in the wind, quickly glanced around to see where the noise had come from.

Of course I saw nothing but tree branches.

Then I heard a melodious voice.

"Would you allow me to step closer lady Amelia?"

I jolted a bit and quickly sat on the bench. I blinked several time. How could this elf, it was obviously an elf, know that I was here? I didn't really have the time to think about it though and I cleared my throat a bit before answering.

"Erm, sure." I had no idea what to say anyway.

Branches moved to my right and I saw the elf who had spoken with the King step under the tree. His eyes were immediately on me and I felt that I would have trouble hiding anything to him. He offered me a kind smile before he walked completely in.

"This is one of Lord Elrond's daughter favourite places." He said calmly, walking closer to the pond's edge. "She often comes here when she needs time alone."

I swallowed thickly, a bit nervous and embarrassed. This elf seemed important and I didn't know whether I was allowed to come here or not.

"I'm sorry, I didn't mean to disturb anyone…" I started before he raised a hand to stop me.

"You are allowed to go anywhere in Imladris my lady. You are perfectly safe as long as you stay within our borders." He didn't really seem to pay attention to anything as he said that.

Still, he offered me a kind smile. I breathed a bit more easily and I nodded, smiling in gratitude.

"Your friends were worried about your disappearance though." He added calmly.

I frowned and looked away. Of course the dwarves would be worried. They were always worried. I would admit that they sometimes had reasons, but at this moment I really didn't want to think about those. Still I knew that worried dwarves could be rather bothersome. Glancing at the elf I sighed before speaking.

"I hope they haven't annoyed anyone. They can sometimes be a bit…" What word could I actually use?

As I mused on my little vocabulary issue I heard a soft chuckle and looked at the elf.

"Yes, they can." He nodded clearly amused. "Don't worry, but the next time, maybe tell one of them where you intend to go. They've spent their afternoon running everywhere in our domain to find you."

My eyes widened in surprise as I looked at this elf. He was wearing fine clothes, but not that much finer from the others from what I could tell. He had a circlet on his head though and I realized I had to be speaking to the Lord of this place.

"You're Lord Elrond?" I blurted out before quickly blushing as I hadn't thought about this at all.

He blinked and for a second I thought I had offended him. Then he chuckled, clearly finding the situation funny, before he replied.

"I am not." He shook his head. "My name is Erestor." He bowed his head gracefully as I felt my cheeks heat up once more. "And you're the human girl who lives within the dwarves' Halls." He added, looking at me curiously.

I nodded, unsure of what to do until I quickly stood up. I found it oddly disturbing to see such a beautiful man bow while I sat on a bench. I had no idea how this could be perceived either. Was it even polite? I quickly brushed my clothes, trying to look a bit more presentable in front of this graceful person but his hand on my shoulder stopped me.

"You've been through a lot recently." He said. "From what little King Thorin told our Lord Elrond, you're an interesting person."

"I'm no one, really." I blushed. "I was just lucky to meet dwarves when I arrived here."

I saw him quirk an eyebrow and I bit my lower lip. I didn't know whether my unusual circumstances were meant to be kept secret or not. In a split second I chose not to say anything about my previous world.

"Were you?" He asked, obviously slightly curious.

"They helped me a lot. They taught me a lot." I replied softly.

He remained silent after that.

After a minute or so I suddenly started to feel a bit less nervous and slowly I calmed down. The peacefulness of the place was once more working its magic on me.

"Lindir told me you were interested in healing?" Erestor said after awhile.

It was a surprise that Lindir would remember something I said. It was even stranger to think he would repeat it to another elf, especially one who looked important like Erestor. For a second I was shocked at the thought and took my time to answer.

"Yes." I finally replied. "I'm a healer, but probably not nearly as good as the healers around here."

"If you wish, you are welcome to consult our libraries, I'm certain that some of our apprentices would not mind showing you around them."

I blushed a bit and bit my lip. There was no point in lying to him. If I refused I might offend an important person. I had to tell the truth.

"I would like that Lord Erestor, but unfortunately I don't know how to read."

He seemed slightly surprised by that and looked at me from the corner of his eyes.

"How did you learn healing then? A lot can be taught from practice, but much has to be learnt from books. I am quite sure that even the dwarves possess tomes on the topic."

"I…it's complicated. I learnt from different people." I tried to explain lamely.

It clearly didn't convince him though, but he didn't say anything about it. Once more we remained silent for awhile until he turned to face me.

"Would you require someone to escort you back to your friends?" He politely asked.

I didn't want to disturb him. He was an elf and most likely an important one, unless they all had fine clothes, jewels and circlets. Besides he seemed to talk easily about their Lord Elrond and Lindir, who was a chamberlain, talked to him too. I had no idea who this Erestor was, but I felt he wasn't just a random elf, if that even existed. But he had said the dwarves were looking around for me. It meant I had to come back to face reality at some point. Instead of bothering another elf who would have to come down to this place I nodded and replied.

"If it's not too much of a bother, would you please show me the way?"

He nodded and offered me his arm.

I blushed a bit and hesitantly placed my hand in the nook of his elbow. It felt surreal. I was walking from under a weeping willow with an elf escorting me back to the dwarves. In moments like this, it truly hit me how weird my life had become. I took the time to look a bit more around as Lord Erestor guided me through the maze of gardens and corridors. This place was probably as tricky as Thorin's Halls. I would love to have a map.

As we arrived in front of a long building, Lindir met us and bowed his head slightly. Hadn't I been looking at him, I probably wouldn't have noticed it.

"Lindir will show you to your friends. I hope you'll enjoy your stay here lady Amelia."

"Thank you Lord Erestor. This place is so amazing, I don't see how I couldn't." I replied honestly, though something told me the dwarves wouldn't agree with me.

The lord left us and I observed him for a second. It was almost disturbing to see him move so graciously, and it seemed perfectly natural for him. I glanced at Lindir. I felt less nervous with him and so I smiled and asked him without hesitation.

"Lindir, who is Lord Erestor?"

"Was he the one to ask you to call him that?" Lindir asked with a smile.

"He said his name was Erestor." I frowned, confused.

"Yes, it is his name." Lindir smiled kindly. "But you don't have to call him Lord. He's in charge of our libraries, among other things."

It explained maybe why he had been told about my interest in medical tomes. Then I suddenly seemed to remember why I was going back from the garden to the dwarves.

"Have the dwarves created problems because of me?" I asked, dreading the answer.

The elf seemed to ponder his answer which was enough to let me know that there had indeed been several problems while I was gone. I wasn't surprised. I had witnessed several food fights in the dwarves' Halls, but today it had felt almost forced. It wasn't due to merriment and cheerfulness. It hadn't been because of an excessive amount of ale either. No. Something had felt odd since I woke up in the elvish room. The dwarves were restless and restless dwarves meant trouble.

"Not more than what we expected."

I glanced at Lindir while I took the offered arm.

His answer was ambiguous. I frowned. The way he had said it told me that they expected the worst from dwarves. Somehow I felt a bit offended for my friends, even though I was also ashamed at their behaviour. Still I had to defend them.

"They are rude, noisy, blunt, and not used to live the way you do." I said purposely bluntly. "But they're the most loyal people I ever met."

Lindir's piercing gaze didn't disturb me. I had stated it like this because I didn't want any misinterpretation; I was with the dwarves, no matter how rude they were or how kind the elves had been. In the end he looked away and chose a diplomatic and short answer.

"Indeed."

I couldn't help but smirk slightly but I turned my head to the other side to hide it. In order to change topics I looked a bit around and at some point, I just couldn't help but realize the difference between my clothes and Lindir. It wasn't so much the difference in fashion but the one in cleanliness that disturbed me. Embarrassment once more made me blush and I cleared my throat before asking very low.

"Lindir, is there a place where I could bath and clean my clothes? My time with those monsters really didn't help."

"Of course." He replied immediately. "But I believe your " He paused for a second before continuing, "…friends would appreciate that you see them before."

I had noticed his hesitation, of course, but didn't comment on it. At this very moment I too was unsure of what to call them.

"Ask for me later, and I'll show you the way." He added before he stopped in front of a large door.

At that exact time two elves opened it and exited the room. One was very tall and had broad shoulders. His hair looked honestly like molten gold. My eyes were riveted on him and I lost my trail of thoughts for a second.

"Ah Lindir!" He exclaimed and broke my strange daze.

I shook my head and glanced at the second elf. He was tall too, but much thinner and his hair had a dark brown colour that seemed much more natural.

"Glorfindel. Are they all here?" Lindir asked the blond elf.

"Yes, but they're restless. They believe, for whatever reason, that we've done something to their human friend." He sighed loudly and his green eyes settled on me. "I hope she's the one, because I honestly don't want to deal with those noisy dwarves any further."

I frowned and suddenly the elf named Glorfindel lost all his appeal to me. I didn't see him as a beautiful man anymore. I felt offended by his tone and comment. Sure the dwarves could be very rude, but still, it wasn't necessary to put it quite like this. He didn't even seem to notice my glare as Lindir answered.

"Yes, this is the lady Amelia." He then turned to me before adding. "Your friends are waiting for you. This room was prepared for them. There is another one we prepared for you." He pointed at another door further down the corridor. "We will leave you now."

"Thank you Lindir. You were very kind and helpful." I said while opening the door. "I had never met any elves before you. Thankfully for the others you were the one I met. My impressions would probably have been different otherwise." As I spoke I looked coldly at the blond elf.

He stared back evenly but I didn't react at all. I could stare at him emotionlessly too. At some point though I let a small smirk tug at one corner of my lips and I turned away before closing the door behind me.

I wondered whether my not-so-thinly veiled insult had been too much. Was it inappropriate? The elf had only said the truth, dwarves were noisy. But well, I didn't see why he would have the right to say that. I hadn't truly insulted the elf anyway, though I knew he understood perfectly well the meaning behind my words. It wasn't really hidden.

I frowned, wondering whether my words would worsen the clearly tensed relationship between those elves and the dwarves. Still thinking about potential effects I took a few steps inside, looking at my feet.

As soon as I looked up though, I froze.

All the dwarves were looking at me.

Some were glaring, others merely frowning. There wasn't any kind smile, smirk or wink in the horizon though. I clenched my jaw and squared my shoulders. My gaze found the icy blue one of our King. His eyes seemed to promise me endless pain if I did anything he didn't approve of.

"You."

Me.

"Where were you?" He growled angrily.

I quickly glanced around. A second was enough to make sure that no dwarf would help me in this situation. Not even the three brothers. This realization hurt me but it also rekindled the fire of my anger. I would need that anger if I were to face them all. Finally I locked my gaze to the King's.

"I was in one of the gardens." My tone was as cold as possible and I had to remind myself that he wouldn't hit me.

His glare seemed to intensify.

"What are you doing here? Why in Mahal's name were you so far east?"

"I am here to find you all. I was trying to find you and before you say anything, yes, I know it wasn't the best of plans." I replied quickly, trying my best to keep my tone even and calm.

"Before I say anything?" The King repeated before bellowing. "Who do you think you are girl? Do you think any of us have the time to take care of you? Why did you follow us?"

I chose not to answer his first question. I knew it probably was useless to tell him I wasn't a little girl he could scold like this. His comment about taking care of me made me blush in anger and I crossed my arms over my chest.

"I am truly sorry to cause you any unnecessary worry. I wouldn't want to have you disturbed by my presence." I drawled sarcastically before adding in a snarl. "I followed you because I was aiming to bring you back, even though I perfectly knew you wouldn't."

He took several steps, marching on me, and stopped a step away. I heard some noise around but I was completely focused on the King.

"Beware your tone. Being away from the Halls doesn't mean I can't banish you." He groaned.

Oh…he wasn't going to like what he was about to learn…

"Actually, that's exactly what it means." I retorted angrily. "I am here on Dís' orders. In your absence she's the regent and her orders are to be followed. Isn't that what you wrote to her before you left the Halls with her two sons?"

I was surprised to see him slightly taken aback for a second as he glanced around. I knew right then that Dís had been right. Her brother hadn't thought everything through. He was wary of his sister, especially when Fili and Kili were concerned. The King's protectiveness of the two young dwarves was probably as great as Dís' own.

"I am here as a messenger as well actually. I am to let you all know that several ladies are aware of your destination and do not agree with your quest. Dís' words were especially explicit concerning retributions if Fili and Kili weren't immediately sent back on their way home."

The King took a step back and turned away. It gave me the time to look at the others. Fili and Kili seemed horrified. Bombur's face was red and he had clearly guessed that his intended was among the ladies. Gloin was coughing loudly and Oin was hitting his back absentmindedly. But my eyes kept looking around until I found three faces.

Three dwarves that seemed to hesitate between their anger and their guilt.

"From what I understood" I started once more. "Some of you are to be reminded of certain vows, or so I was told." Gloin's coughed some more at that. "It was explained to me once that dwarves respected their ladies above all else. I was told to let you know you forgot this little custom."

Ori looked away and Dori looked sheepish. Only Nori met my gaze but he didn't hold it for long and he turned away. I knew he had to remember some of his words to me.

There was a short moment of silence before the King cleared his throat and turned back to face me and glare once more at me.

"You spoke your message. When we leave this place you'll have the choice to stay here and wait for us or to ask for an escort back to…"

I didn't want to let him speak for nothing so I interrupted him. If he thought it rude, then at least I would have a small revenge for the shame I had felt earlier during lunch.

"Are you continuing this quest?"

Before the King could bellow in anger at me, Balin stepped in.

"Amelia, this quest is important to us all and…"

"Then I'm following you too." I said matter-of-factly with a shrug.

Immediately there was a chaos of protest before the King's shout shut everyone up. He pointed a finger at me and gruffly exclaimed.

"I am not giving you permission to follow us."

"I'm sorry, but I don't think you can do anything about it." I shrugged, though my heart was beating strongly against my ribs. "Is my bag around here?"

As I asked this question I turned around and after a short moment Ori almost jogged to bring me my belongings. Immediately I opened a hidden pocket inside that had been put there by Nori. Inside I found the wrinkled parchment that was supposed to help me convince the King, or so Dís had said. The scroll was rather thick and had barely fitted in the hidden pocket, so I had trouble to take it out but after a short struggle with the damn paper I was able to hand it to the King.

It was rather fun to see him pale as soon as he unrolled it and read the first lines.

"This…" He stammered.

"As you can see it was signed appropriately with two witnesses and sealed with blood too, as per the ancestral custom." I repeated Dís' words and showed my left thumb where a small cut was now barely visible. "I am officially appointed by the regent and head healer of Thorin's Halls to this company. The contract was signed in blood and binds me to the other signatory's kin. It can only be broken by the signatories, me and Dís, and no, I don't intend to break it. I am now responsible of several members of this company's health."

"This is ridiculous!" The King bellowed, throwing the parchment to the ground but not destroying it. "Oin is our healer! We don't need you. What madness befell my sister?!"

"Oin is undoubtedly better than me when it comes to plants. But ask him who is better suited to treat major injuries that are likely to happen to the members of this company."

My shout had clearly surprised everyone. Soon though, all eyes were on Oin. The old healer's words would probably be the last said on this topic. If he agreed with me, I was in, if he didn't, I'd still have to argue.

Begrudgingly the old dwarf glared at me and groaned.

"She'll be helpful Thorin. She does have more knowledge than me when some types of wounds are concerned."

I couldn't hide my triumphant smirk even if I had wanted to. The dwarves didn't hide their disapproving pouts and frowns either but they all knew that they couldn't do much, especially since Dís had chosen to make me sign a contract. Dwarves respected contracts.

Dís' idea had worked. She had insisted before my departure that I entered a blood contract with her. Thankfully the King hadn't taken the time to read all the side notes, as his sister had predicted, or he would have realized that this piece of parchment wasn't really binding me to the fates of Dís' line as an ordinary blood contract would. Had we signed an ordinary blood agreement, I would have sworn on my own life to protect her kin. But Dís wasn't cruel or stupid, she knew what her brother was like, she knew what this quest could entail. She had asked me what I planned to do once I met with the dwarves, what I would do if they didn't come back immediately. It was only after I told her that I would follow them no matter what, that she came out with this idea of a contract.

In all truth it didn't bind me at all. The terms were not precise, and the whole thing was riddled with loopholes that protected me from having to commit suicide if I couldn't keep the dwarves safe. But now, they didn't need to know that…did they?

Seeing as how the King had barely looked at the parchment, I felt as if I had won a small victory. The feeling was short lived though when most of the dwarves turned away and ignored me.

It hurt.

Silently I took back the contract and rolled it properly. I didn't want to let them see that their behaviour was painful to experience. I grabbed my bag and only then did I realize that my staff was still attached to it. I had seen my daggers inside too. Except for those weapons, a change of clothes, several random things and my satchel containing my tools, there wasn't much in the bag. Still I was glad that my satchel was completely intact, I would place the contract in it, to keep it safe. I placed the bag on my shoulder and with a sigh turned to leave.

I was at the door when Nori stopped me.

"Where are you going?" He whispered.

His face was blank but his eyes showed how uncertain he felt. Clearly the thief didn't know whether to be angry, upset or something else.

"In my room. I'm clearly not welcome." I murmured for his ears only.

He frowned and looked around us, undoubtedly seeing the same things I did, he was sadly used to these behaviours.

"Alright, I'm coming with you."

I quirked an eyebrow. Did he really think that I would let him? Well, if I were honest I would say that I would like it, but right now I wasn't too sure of how I should react with him. Should I tell him about how angry I was against him and his brothers? Should I explain the hurt I felt because of the dwarves' behaviours? Should we speak about what had almost happened when he left?

"I'm not leaving you alone in this place." He insisted with a stern look as I clearly hesitated.

I rolled my eyes and went outside. He followed me silently as I closed the door and walked to the one Lindir had indicated.

"Honestly, what's going on here? You've all been rude earlier. I don't get it." I didn't know why we spoke in hushed tones, but it seemed oddly appropriate.

"Thorin doesn't trust the elves. He hates them."

It didn't sound like a proper excuse. Far from it actually. I felt as if there was more to this than Nori was telling me, but I didn't really care to find out what was happening in our King's head. Besides, as far as I could tell, all the dwarves were behaving in the same odd way. Obviously it wasn't just distrust. I glanced at Nori and quirked an eyebrow.

"And you?"

"I don't trust anyone, except for a few people." He frowned and looked around, as if he was readying himself for an attack.

Fair enough. I was about to speak again when we heard the door behind us open. Both Nori and I turned to face the dwarves that had come outside. I honestly wasn't surprised to see Dori and Ori. I was surprised though to see Dori glare at his younger brother. Nori didn't seem to care at all, so I chose not to ask. Clearly their little quest was making all those dwarves grumpy in one way or another.

"Where are you going?" Dori asked, still glaring at Nori.

"I'm escorting Amelia to her room. I can do that, right?"

Alright, something was definitely going on. Last time I had seen Dori and Nori, their relationship was good, if sometimes a bit tense. Right then, it felt as if we were back a year in the past, when Dori didn't yet know why Nori was a thief.

"Her room?"

"Lindir told me they had prepared one for me." I said while gesturing to the door behind me.

I glanced at Nori when I heard him grumble something that sounded oddly like "damn skinny elf" and I saw that he was frowning. I suddenly felt like screaming. These dwarves were annoying me to a point where I actually wanted to scream. That was a feat. Without waiting for them I sharply turned and opened the door, striding in quickly.

I knew they followed me in. I didn't pay attention to them while I walked to the small, magnificently carved bed that was in the middle of the small room. I let my bag fall on the floor and I turned, crossing my arms and facing the three brothers. Ori was clearly behaving in a sheepish way. I was almost certain that the youngest brother wasn't that proud of his lies and behaviour.

Dori, though he wasn't completely hostile, obviously displayed his disapproval. I knew he didn't want me to follow them. I knew he was going to scold me for attempting to find them by myself. I fully expected him to berate me, but I wouldn't let him do all the yelling.

Nori remained slightly apart. His face was still completely blank and he was staring at the ground. I honestly didn't know for sure how he would react to the recent events. I was almost certain he would agree with his older brother. Nori was one of the most protective persons I knew. And a small voice in the back of my mind was whispering that this side of him was stronger when I was concerned.

Well…

I wasn't going to let them get away with abandoning me and lying to me.

This discussion was going to be tense.

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><p><strong>AN: Thanks everyone for all the support you're showing. It's a constant motivation.**

**I know I am making you all wait. I can simply thank you all for your patience. I am doing my very best to keep this story interesting. I can't promise you when the next chapter will be updated. It probably will be sooner than it was for this one, as it will be shorter (But I don't think it can be decribed as a short chapter, you all know me by now... and my chapters' size)**

**I really hope you enjoyed this chapter and the introduction of the elves. Next chapter...huge discussion with the brothers :D **

**Soon Bilbo will appear too... And Finally the quest will properly start ;) **

**Thanks a lot everyone! I can't express how happy it makes me to read your reviews. Thank you all.**


	44. Let Them Talk

**Everything belongs to JRRTolkien.  
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><p>I didn't want to be the first one to talk. I knew that the three dwarves, or probably only two of them, would start to argue with me quite soon. I could tell that this discussion wasn't going to be pleasant. Somehow, I wished we could avoid it, but there was no way around this. I knew full well that Dori and Nori would have to say something about my decision of following them. From what I had experimented of dwarves' culture so far, I could tell that they weren't really what one could describe as patient. I was. So I waited, knowing full well that Dori would be the first to speak.<p>

He didn't disappoint me.

"Amelia." He started with a stern voice. "Contract or not, you are not coming on this quest with us. We'll find another solution."

"Dori I…" I tried to interrupt but the dwarf surprised me by raising his voice.

"This is not a mission or a joke Amelia. This is serious. You are not ready for such a quest." He was speaking in sharp, short sentences and some of his words were punctuated by a swift move of his hand. "We almost died twice already. That includes you. We've been lucky so far, but no one can tell what awaits us. I am not going to let you join us." He turned and paced for a few seconds, his anger clearly visible on his features. "Do you even realize how important this quest is? Do you realize why we are going? Where we are going? This is not some mere bandits or wolves we are fighting. These are orcs! Orcs and a dragon and a thousand more dangers stand between us and our goal! I will not watch you die! I couldn't stop Ori from joining us, but I refuse to let you go!"

Ori had blushed when Dori named him. I saw him glare a bit in his brother's direction and I could guess that this had indeed been a sore topic for them. I quickly looked to the side of the room where Nori stood, half in the shadows. He remained completely impassive and I averted my gaze. There would be another time to speak with him privately. For now I wasn't going to let Dori dictate my fate.

"Don't you think I realize all that?" I coldly said. "Don't you think I know very well I could have died while alone? Don't you think I saw those creatures, those orcs, when they were chasing after us? I might have been hurt back then, but I was still conscious."

I couldn't say that right now, those memories were blurry at best. It was irrelevant anyway.

"Then you will perfectly understand why I don't want you to come." Dori interrupted my rant.

"Oh, I understand perfectly indeed." I nodded before adding. "But that doesn't mean I'm going to obey. Even if there wasn't this contract I wouldn't let you go without me." I saw him open his mouth but I didn't let him speak. "What do you think I thought when I realized you all lied to me? How do you think I felt?" I accused while glaring at him and I saw him step back. "You lied to me! Sure, if you had told me the truth, I probably would have insisted to come too. But that's not the point. The point is you lied. You looked me in the eyes and lied." I could hear venom in my voice and I took a quick breath to try and calm down a bit.

Dori seemed quite taken aback by my accusations. They were all true as well, which probably made him feel quite guilty. Still, I could tell he wasn't about to change his mind so I breathed deeply and tried to reason with him.

"Right now though, it's only logical that I come along. As you said, this is going to be a dangerous quest and let's be honest, some of us may die. But if I'm here, I might reduce the risk."

"Amelia, I'm sorry we lied to you, but this changes nothing." Dori retorted.

"You're right." I cut in. "It doesn't change anything because I will not listen or obey to you. I'm here on Dís' orders. The king agreed already. Oin agreed too. There's nothing you can say that would change the fact that, whether you like it or not, I'm coming along on this mad quest."

"Enough! Stop behaving like a child!" He suddenly bellowed, startling Ori.

Nori didn't move and, surprisingly, me neither. Instead I took a step forward.

"You can't stop me from following you!" I shouted right back as Nori finally decided to move, coming closer probably to calm the both of us.

"Sure I can!" Dori snapped, glowering at me.

"If you dare leave me behind once more," I coldly hissed. "I'll follow you even if it means crossing this bloody world on my own!" I snarled viciously. "By Mahal I swear I will!" I finally promised in a shout.

An eerie silence settled in the room as my last words seemed to ring in my ears. My fists were clenched to my side and I glared at Dori who was in a similar position. Neither of us wanted to lower his gaze. In the end, it was because of Ori that we did. The sweet, usually peaceful dwarf stepped between me and Dori while he cleared his throat loudly. He was looking between the two of us, unsure of what to say or do. Thankfully for him, Nori finally decided to intervene.

I felt his hand fall lightly on my shoulder before he spoke.

"Are the both of you done? Can we speak now?"

It was a bit odd to see him act quite so calmly. Usually he was the one shouting at Dori, and I was the one playing intermediary. As that particular thought crossed my mind I had to bit my tongue to stop a cynical jab to escape my mouth. I had to calm down or things would get ugly.

"Don't tell me you agree with this madness!" Dori exclaimed, throwing his hands up in the air and rolling his eyes before turning away.

I glared at him and was about to retort when Nori spoke in a cold and calm voice.

"No I don't agree with it. I don't want Amelia to follow us." I was going to interrupt him when his cold gaze fell on me, effectively stopping me. "But I know her." He continued. "If we don't allow her to come with us, I'm fairly certain she'll find a way to follow us."

I nodded and smirked triumphantly until I met Nori's eyes again. He wasn't happy. My mood dropped suddenly too while Nori kept on talking.

"She'll be safer with us. I'll protect her Dori."

Dori seemed to calm down a bit, though it was still obvious that he wasn't agreeing at all. He breathed out loudly and rubbed his forehead with one of his hands.

"I don't agree with that either Nori."

I frowned when I heard those words and looked at the two dwarves. Dori glared at his brother and I felt the thief tense next to me. Suddenly I had the odd feeling that they weren't exactly talking about the same topic. Dori's words had been strange and as I took a second to think about it, I grew certain that he wasn't only talking about the quest anymore. But I had no idea then what he could be disagreeing with. I frowned and looked at the youngest brother, trying to assess whether he knew what was going on or not.

Ori was still silent and had walked to the side of the room. The younger dwarf was absentmindedly looking out the window. I was wondering why Ori didn't take part in the discussion when Dori spoke again. He sighed loudly first and then pressed his fingers on the bridge of his nose.

"We'll all protect her Nori, but that's not the point. We're not on a simple mission. This is too dangerous." His voice was calm now, and he sounded tired.

"It's too late to change it now." Nori shrugged. "She's as stubborn as any of us and you know it."

I wasn't sure this was a compliment, but as I saw Dori sigh loudly again I decided not to comment. This was obviously hard for the older dwarf. I felt slightly bad about it all, but I couldn't really do anything about it. There was just no way I wouldn't follow them. Thankfully Dís had thought about the contract, otherwise I was certain that the dwarves would have all tried to send me away. At least with Dís' plan I had the King and Oin more or less on my side.

"You shouldn't have come Amelia." Dori said again softly before he just turned away and walked to the door. "I'm not sure when exactly Thorin plans to leave. You should sleep while you can. This journey won't be as easy as the missions you had."

He looked suddenly utterly defeated. His shoulders and head hung low and he didn't even look at me. I felt a pang of guilt and pain at seeing him like this. Dori was supposed to be strong. He was my guardian. I loved him as a brother, or uncle, or whatever, but I loved him. I hated that we had to fight. After those encouraging words, he simply left us three behind and went out. The room was silent for a long minute before Ori decided to face us and speak.

"I'm not really sure you should have come, but I'm glad you did."

Looking in his eyes I only saw kindness and understanding. Of course. If any of them could understand me, it probably was Ori. He had to go through the horror of waiting at home while his brothers were risking their lives outside. He wasn't a warrior. He probably was the only one who could truly relate to my feelings. He probably was the only one who would understand.

I smiled softly, if a bit hesitantly, in his direction.

His own smile was hesitant too but obviously genuine and I felt much better. We both took a step at the same time and in a second we were holding each other tightly. My heart swelled with affection for this dwarf and tears gathered in the corner of my eyes.

"I'm so glad I found you." I whispered in his ears.

"Well, technically you didn't." He replied and leant back with a cheeky smile.

I smirked and playfully punched his shoulder.

"Be careful Ori, I'm still mad at you for leaving me behind."

"And I'm still mad at you for following and now joining us." He retorted immediately.

Our gazes locked for a moment and in that short time span we seemed to understand each other perfectly. We didn't agree with the other choices, but we were happy to be together. We both knew we would support each other. We were a family. Ori was my brother. My older brother. He would always somehow be on my side even if he didn't truly agree. He would always understand, or try to at least. Oh Mahal, I knew for sure at this instant that I would do almost anything for him.

"Fair enough." I nodded as he imitated me.

After another moment of silence he looked behind me at Nori and seemed to hesitate. Then he just smiled at me, hugged me once more and simply turned away. He left without adding another word.

I was a bit perplexed by his behaviour to be entirely honest. I turned to ask Nori about it but I stopped, my mouth slightly open, and I froze.

Nori had walked to the other end of the room and was now looking out the window. His arms were crossed over his chest but I could see in his tense shoulders and the whiteness of his knuckles that he was really annoyed, angry even.

Furious, maybe?

I closed my eyes for a second. I swallowed thickly and felt anxiety rise in my chest. Somehow, I knew that this discussion was going to be harder than all the others put together.

It was really strange how Nori and I would always go from one extreme to the other. Sometimes I didn't even need to say a word because he would immediately understand me. We would in those moments be closer than ever. Some other times we would barely be able to speak to each other, our differences in opinions violently clashing. Unfortunately, today was closer to the later extreme.

I looked at him.

Really looked at him.

I realized then that he was trembling slightly and I could only guess it was from barely contained anger. His hair was slightly dishevelled but they were still up in their weird, yet oddly appealing hairdo. His beard was as always intricately braided and my eyes caught how his mouth was drawn in a thin line. I noticed the tense, broad shoulders and the way his muscles moved under the layers of clothes as he finally turned to face me.

"You shouldn't be here."

I barely contained a sigh. I thought we were past that. It suddenly appeared to me that I was going to have the exact same discussion over and over again. I could only hope it wouldn't be the case with all the dwarves, otherwise I would soon become really bored and annoyed. I didn't like to repeat myself, but I could tell it was about to happen anyway.

"You shouldn't have left." I replied automatically, parroting my own earlier words.

"You promised to stay safe, you said you wouldn't endanger yourself stupidly." He groaned, his frown more impressive because of his braided eyebrows.

"And you promised not to leave me alone. You said you wouldn't abandon me and that's exactly what you did." I shrugged before I walked past him towards the large window.

The sun was shining outside and the valley seemed so peaceful. It was in complete contradiction with how I was feeling at the moment. My heart was clenching painfully in my chest. Whatever I had unconsciously hoped this reunion would be, I knew for sure this wasn't it, at all. Even though I tried to act nonchalantly in front of him, I was genuinely upset by his actions.

"Amelia, I didn't leave you." I could hear his annoyance in his tone.

I didn't look at him. At this moment I couldn't. I leant on the windowsill and grasped the wood tightly until my knuckles became white. I glared at nothing, refusing to face Nori. Tension rose between us.

"You did Nori." I said rather coldly, anger was slowly surging back in my chest, pushing anxiety and pain away. "That night…that night you could have told me, you could have said something. You chose not to. You deliberately left me behind, alone, in the dark." I knew he would understand the metaphors and I didn't even want to bother being subtle with him.

"Amelia, this isn't a simple mission. What was I supposed to tell you?" He was getting angrier too. "Sorry, but I'm going on a quest and I might never return, please don't wait for me?" His snarky comment only made me mad.

"That would have been a good start." I retorted sharply.

"Don't be ridiculous!"

"You're one to talk!" I barked, turning swiftly to find him closer to me than he had been previously.

There was a long silence after that. Our eyes were locked and his glare was just as intense as mine. I crossed my arms over my chest and lifted my chin a bit, daring him to complain or say anything. Rather suddenly he sighed and closed his eyes. He rubbed his forehead tiredly and I could easily see that he was not only angry, but really tired too.

Clearly this quest was already taking its toll on the dwarves.

"This talk is pointless." He groaned exasperatedly.

"You think?" I usually didn't use sarcasm all that much, but right then it seemed like the best option.

The problem apparently, was that Nori really, really didn't like sarcasm. The glare he sent my way was even stronger than the previous ones and I slightly stepped back.

"Enough Amelia! You're not helping!"

"What exactly do you want me to say?" I retorted heatedly. "Sorry I tried to find you? Sorry I was worried? Sorry I got caught by those beasts? Because obviously all this is purely my fault!" I threw my hands up in the air in pure annoyance.

"Can't you at least see that you shouldn't be here? You really don't realize how dangerous it is?"

"Oh stop it!" I snapped. "If you really cared all that much for me, you wouldn't have left me behind, all alone in the Halls. You would have at least had the decency to tell me the truth. What do you think would have happened if I didn't see either of you come back? You're all basically telling me that this is a suicide mission. But what then Nori? What did you expect me to do once you were all dead somewhere and I was left all alone, forever wondering what happened? Does this story sound familiar to you at all?" I ranted angrily, tears burning in the back of my eyes as my voice lowered significantly. "You wouldn't have forced me to suffer like this if you cared even a little bit." I finished almost in a whisper.

This was quite untrue and completely unfair. I knew. I was perfectly aware of the fact that Nori would never hurt me on purpose. One glance was enough for me to realize that he was really taken aback by this attack. He recovered quickly though and soon he was replying viciously.

"Right, because it is clearly so much better to take you along. Of course you're the only bloody woman I know who's so damn suicidal! Are you actually trying to have yourself killed? Because let me tell you, you're doing a bloody fine job if that's the case."

"Oh please! Your journey isn't that dangerous right now, is it?" I snorted and crossed my arms before looking at the view from my window once again.

Apparently this was the perfect thing to say if I wanted to infuriate him. From the corner of my eye, I saw him close his fists tightly to the point that his knuckles turned white once more. His hands were even shaking slightly. One glance at his eyes made me shiver and I averted my gaze, suddenly uncomfortable.

"If I had known you would love those fucking elves so much, I would have brought you here earlier. Good riddance!"

I jolted.

Those two words pronounced with such hatred broke my heart.

A sharp pain pierced my chest as I felt all air leave my lungs.

I felt the blood leave my face completely and I could tell I was trembling a bit. Thoughts were travelling in my mind at light speed. Was Nori really so angry at me? Would he really leave me here without looking back? Did he really not care?

I staggered backwards before I finally looked back up at him.

I didn't know what to expect. I felt both numb and terrified.

Did he really hate me so much? Didn't I mean anything to him?

One of his hand was extended in my direction and I could see on his face that he was honestly suffering from the words he had just said. I had trouble breathing as I looked at him. Our eyes met and I was quite sure that the both of us were hurting just as much right then.

"Amelia, Mizimul I…"

"Nori, you…"

We looked at each other for a while before I spoke softly, with a tiny, uncertain voice.

"Would you really leave me here gladly?"

He closed his eyes for a second, as if in pain and shook his head.

"I, no…just, no."

There was another lull in the conversation as I suddenly felt weak and tired. I took a deep breath, trying to gather some courage.

"After all this time, all these talks and promises...how could you just leave like that? How..." I almost whispered.

"You broke promises too!" He spoke in a soft tone, though I knew he was still angry.

"I guess we're even then." I replied tiredly.

We were at an impasse. This discussion was going in circle and was utterly pointless. I sighed loudly and my exasperation was probably a bit too annoying for Nori, as were the words I had just said. His anger seemed to come back strongly as he spoke again, this time not as softly as before. Clearly both our emotions were on a rollercoaster that day. One second I felt tired, the next I was sad, then hurt, then furious, then back to exhausted...all in all this wasn't healthy.

"Do you think this is some kind of contest between the two of us?" He spat the words before laughing humourlessly. "Yeah, you definitely won that round! Amelia, I found you in some trolls' stinky hole. Actually no. I found your daggers first Amelia! Your daggers! Do you know what I thought, what I felt, when I saw them? By Mahal do you even know what they would have done to you?!"

My blood was boiling again in my veins as I glared at him. I hated how he was reminding me about this awful place. I purposely ignored half of his words and only concentrated on part of them. I tried to push away the memories of my prison while I held onto my anger. Anger was safer right now, I would have time to let my fears out later.

"Yes, I think I know perfectly well, thank you very much. I was the one they caught and kept in that fucking cage." I replied icily. "You're right, I shouldn't have come. I shouldn't have left the Halls. Clearly I was mistaken in my belief that you saw me as an equal. That you understood." I glared at him, deeply hurt by the thought that Nori might actually think of me as a bother or worse...as weak.

Nori was about to add something but I didn't let him.

"That night." I said before feeling a lump in my throat. "That night I knew something was wrong. Do you think I'm stupid? I knew it. And you left. Nori you left me alone!" My voice broke then and when I looked into his eyes, I saw something shift.

It wasn't anger anymore that I felt.

I didn't give him the time to reply though as I continued.

"You abandoned me Nori! You left me behind. You left me wondering and worrying...and despairing, and...and hoping, and... and..." I had trouble breathing and started to heave. Suddenly my eyes seemed to burn as I struggled to maintain my fury. It was a lost cause, right now my heart was hurting too much for me to think about anything else than the pain I had felt, the pain I still felt.

"Hoping?" Nori seemed startled by that word only and it rekindled my anger anew, though clearly not to the extent it had been.

"For fuck's sake what do you think I felt!"

He looked taken aback for a second but soon enough he frowned again while my heart broke in small pieces.

"What do you think I feel?" I whispered as anger, hurt and sadness battled for dominion over my feelings.

His eyes suddenly reflected how lost he felt for a second. I could see different emotions flashing on his face. He looked down and his next words were barely audible.

"I don't get it Amelia." He whispered sadly and it pained me to hear it. "What do you expect me to do?"

Oddly it annoyed me enormously to hear him utter such words. I was the one stuck in another world. I was the one who had to learn another way to live. I was the one learning about other cultures, languages, and basically other ways to live. I should not be the one answering such a question.

"I don't bloody know!" I glared at him before continuing with the first words that came through my mind. "You're a thief Nori! A master spy now even. I thought you knew everything! Isn't that supposed to be your job anyway?!" I snapped angrily, tears clouding my vision.

"Is that what you really want? A thief? A spy?" He growled once more furious.

"I don't want anything except..." I started to hiss before I brutally stopped and bit my lip strongly. "Except..." I repeated yet unable to say the words I wanted to say.

My heart was hammering against my ribcage and I turned away from him, unwilling to see his anger anymore and feeling suddenly more exhausted and weak than ever. My eyes drifted over the gorgeous landscape but I couldn't really see any of it. I was honestly too tired now.

I didn't like this situation. Actually I hated it.

The dwarves were all angry and unhappy about me being here. Even Nori didn't like it. I didn't know what I had expected. Honestly, I didn't. But I could tell it wasn't that. No, it surely wasn't that.

I didn't want to confess my feelings to Nori, not that way at least, and especially not while we were fighting like this.

"Except what?" His voice was now nothing but a soft murmur. All anger had left him. Still I didn't answer and he insisted. "Amelia, except what?"

"Idiot." That was the last word that left my mouth before I felt him place a hand on my arm.

"Mizimul?" I had never heard him sound like that.

His voice was heavy with hidden emotions and I was about to speak when his fingers tightened their grip on my arm.

He spun me around and our eyes met. A tear rolled on my cheek and I saw his eyes follow its trail. He leant suddenly and I blinked as I realized his lips were on my skin. My breath itched in my throat as Nori kissed the tear away. My hands reflexively went to grab his arms and I clutched at his tunic when I felt his lips slowly brushed my skin lightly. His hold on me tightened a bit, as if to hold me there, but there was no way I would have moved right now.

Slowly he placed soft kisses on my cheekbone, on my scar, before he went down a bit and kissed my jaw. My eyes were half closed as I concentrated not to move, not to speak or worse…whimper. I didn't realize that my body was pressing against his. When his lips trailed down my neck, I couldn't help but gasp as my eyes closed. It just served to make him bit lightly at the base of my throat. I felt my knees shake slightly as Nori kissed softly the place he had just bitten.

My skin was tingling. No. Actually it was worse than that. I felt feverish and lightheaded. The skin touched by his lips seemed to burn, sending too many information through my nerves. I wanted him to kiss me already but he apparently had something else in mind. Damn him, I had waited long enough already.

All coherent thoughts became harder to conjure when I felt his lips trail back up the column of my throat. He then proceeded to kiss lightly the skin just below my ear and I gripped him tighter, barely stopping a moan. I felt his lips smile against my skin and his beard grazed me, making me shiver. My breath itched as he peppered my jaw with small kisses again. I could honestly tell that I hated him when he stopped a hairbreadth away from my lips.

"Is that what you want? A sneaky thief?"

I absentmindedly nodded, eyes half closed and unseeing, but Nori was apparently in a talkative mood and I cursed him silently.

"Do you really want that? Despite all the consequences? A honourless dwarf?" His voice wavered slightly at the end and he just suddenly stopped to move.

That sentence seemed to be enough to wake me from the dazed state I was in. my eyes snapped open and I leant back to look at him in earnest. His grey eyes reflected clearly that he didn't think I would want him.

I blinked.

I was supposed to be the uncertain one. Right at this instant though, courage seemed to flow through my veins as I slowly lifted my hand. Softly I caressed his cheekbone before I let my fingers brush his beard. I couldn't help but smile when I saw pink tinge his cheeks. I let my fingers lightly trail over his braids and beads before I finally went back up to caress the skin just above the start of his beard. I smiled softly and kept my hand there before I looked him in the eyes again.

I needed him to know I wasn't lying, that I was sure.

My heart skipped a beat when I realized that his eyes were half closed. Just a simple gesture on my part meant already so much for him. As my hand had stopped to move, his eyes opened again and seemed to be alight with fire.

"You never were honourless Nori." I softly said.

I couldn't tell why but at this moment I wasn't afraid anymore. What could I risk anyway? Clearly both our actions spoke louder than any words could have. I bit my lips before I rather quickly leant forward and kissed the corner of his lips. My skin tingled where his beard lightly touched it and I could honestly say that I liked this new sensation. I didn't linger though because I wasn't sure how my action would be perceived. He was a dwarf after all.

I peered through my lashes and saw him blink several times.

Heat started to blossom on my cheeks and I was about to bolt away when he actually stopped me. His hold on me strengthened, but it wasn't painful at all. My heart was beating too fast and I was certain I would suffer from some sort of heart failure soon if it didn't calm down a bit.

In a second his hands were cupping my cheeks and he forced me to look into his eyes.

We both seemed to freeze at that instant.

I held my breath as his eyes bore into mine.

Then he leant slowly forward and there was a first, soft, tentative kiss.

I almost squeaked in delight as his lips touched mine. The gentle touch didn't last for long and I sighed loudly as he retreated much too fast to my taste. For several long seconds we looked at each other, clearly both startled ...yet I couldn't say either of us was surprised.

Then we both leant and shared a second, slightly longer kiss.

And then a third…

And a fourth…

And...

I lost count of it. I just couldn't get enough. His chapped lips felt just right as they pressed and moved against mines. His beard was tickling me, scratching my skin. I could feel at least one of his beads on my collarbone. One of his hands was pressed against my neck, pulling me closer while I clung onto him desperately. At some point I had closed my eyes as I got lost in all the sensations that were awakening in me. My whole body seemed to come alive against his even though we were simply kissing.

It wasn't a movie kiss, all proper and sweet, or all passionate. Nope. It was just a simple, seemingly endless moment that just the two of us could share.

I wanted it to never stop.

My heart was soaring with happiness. Nori was kissing me. Nori was kissing me!

How long had I waited? How long had we waited?

It all seemed so long, so pointless, now...

I lost myself in the sensations and feelings that his touch was evoking in me. His fingers on my neck sent tendrils of electricity in my skin. His hand pressing on my back was lighting a fire in me and I pressed against him some more, eliciting a low growl from him that made my stomach flutter.

I loved how he would tease me from time to time by biting lightly on my lower lip. The first time it surprised me, the second I responded by licking his lips lightly with the tip of my tongue. He seemed to enjoy it as I heard him groan lowly and at some point I just forgot I had to breathe. Finally I let his teasing tongue caress mine...and I forgot where we were or why we had been fighting minutes ago. I only felt the warmth from our embrace and the simple joy that filled my soul. Still, my lungs screamed for air but I ignored it for as long as I could.

When I was forced to lean back, gasping loudly, I realised that we had somehow moved and that my back was now pressed against the wall near the window. My arms were holding onto Nori tightly as one of my hands clung to the back of his tunic, and the other had sneaked up to his hair, forcing our chests to be pressed tightly against one another. I looked into Nori's eyes and I caught this strange emotion I had never been able to identify before. I felt my heart beat stronger still as I looked at him. I could tell I was smiling and I just happily kissed his nose, waking him from his weird, silent and dazed state.

I didn't want to speak.

I didn't want to ruin this moment.

I realized now that I had waited quite some time for this to happen and I was glad it had. Happy wasn't even starting to describe how I felt.

I leant forward and let my forehead rest against his shoulder. My nose was brushing lightly against his beard.

I smiled some more.

He slowly embraced me and I immediately snuggled up to him.

Oh Mahal I truly loved this dwarf.

At some point though we had to speak and, as I clearly wasn't going to, Nori was the first one to clear his throat.

"Amelia, are you sure…"

I didn't even look up as my fingers pressed against his lips.

I hated that he seemed so hesitant. It made me feel unworthy, even though it clearly weren't his intention. Still, it felt like we should tackle some issues right now. I didn't want to do it. I was still on a small happy, pink cloud. I could barely believe that what had happened had actually been real. But at some point we just had to speak, it was only normal. What had just happened between us was rather huge. It would surely change quite a lot of things. Now that I took a second to think about it, it would actually probably complicate our lives.

I sighed and closed my eyes.

At least right now I was content with simply being in his arms. I squeaked softly, startled, when I felt him softly kiss my fingers. I looked up at him and chuckled when I saw him wink at me, smirking proudly because he had surprised me.

Softly I caressed his cheek and then his beard.

As I let my hand trail down to his chest, I let it stop just above his heart. Damn, it was beating probably as strongly as mine currently was. I smiled some more before I frowned, thinking about Nori's words.

"I could ask the same Nori." I finally said in a very low voice.

Immediately his arms tightened around me.

"Mizimul, I am not what could be considered a good dwarf." His tone was sad, as if he was ashamed, and I hated to hear him speak like that.

"I don't care, I'm not even a dwarf." I replied immediately.

I felt him jolt slightly and I finally looked up. Did he truly forget that fact? I was no dwarf, why should I care about dwarves standards? If anything I should be the worried one because clearly, I wasn't anything close to what dwarves could consider a good wife.

"I…" He frowned and seemed to get stuck.

I was just about to talk again when my ears caught a noise that strangely enough terrified me at this very instant. Nori's reaction told me he had heard it too as he bolted away from me just in time before the door opened on Ori who came in calmly.

As I felt my whole face burn I quickly turned away and chose to concentrate on the view yet again. My heart was beating rapidly, though this time it was from fright. This reaction surprised me. Clearly, neither Nori nor I were ready to talk about this…new development to the others. I didn't pay attention to what Ori was saying as my brain focused on what the other dwarves would probably say. Considering my position in the group, it wasn't really the right time to advertise my feelings for Nori. I could already imagine what they would all have to say about it. Nope, it wouldn't be good. Not good at all.

I jolted when I suddenly felt a hand on my shoulder.

"Amelia? Are you alright?" Ori asked with his usual kind voice.

I glanced behind him only to see Nori's back before I forced a smile on my lips and replied.

"Sure. I'm just a bit tired." I felt relieved when he nodded and added. "Did something happen?"

"Yes, I just told Nori. Apparently we'll have to stay here for a few weeks."

That surprised me. Considering how the dwarves had reacted in the presence of elves, it truly was a shock to find out that they wanted to linger here. I honestly thought that they would have run away as soon as they could.

"Really? Why? Was someone hurt?" I couldn't remember any of them sporting a major injury that would require them to stay bedridden.

They had all seemed to be perfectly healthy as they threw food everywhere earlier.

"No. Everyone's fine. It's just that Thorin needs to have a map deciphered and it can only be done at night under a certain moon's light."

I blinked at his words. This didn't make sense to me, at all. How could the moon influence the way you could read a map?

"What?" I frowned, trying hard to make sense out of his words.

"I don't know more than that. I just came to tell you, and to ask whether you wanted to join us. Everyone gathered on the balcony, and Thorin doesn't want us to be alone too much around here."

At the simple thought of seeing all the others, I felt my stomach tightened painfully. I was anxious of course, I didn't really know what they would tell me. Would they still give me the cold shoulder? Would they accept the fact that, no matter what, I was going along on this quest? Still, I wanted to see them. I wanted to really make sure they were fine. And to be perfectly honest, I didn't want to be alone. I would rather face their anger and disapproval than stay here on my own. Nodding at Ori, I only glanced once at Nori as we left my room.

The other dwarf was obviously avoiding my eyes, but it didn't bother me too much. We would have to talk, but now wasn't really the right time. I wasn't angered or anxious about this. No. Nori's actions had clearly stated how he felt and this comforted me. I felt happier than ever right now, and it was as if nothing could bring my mood down at all. As I stepped behind Ori, I smiled to myself as I replayed in my head what had just happened. Without me realizing it, I brought my fingers to my lips, only waking from my daze when Nori softly brushed my shoulder.

Quickly I schooled my features a bit and let my hand fall back to my side. Nothing could shut down the warm spark that this new development had lighted in my chest though. Even if I tried my best to look as normal as usual, inside, I was feeling better than ever.

As we came in I felt many eyes on me, but none of them said a word. Obviously they knew they didn't have a choice in whether or not I would follow them. There probably wouldn't be any more discussion on the matter. My anxiety disappeared as I saw Bofur cheekily smile at me while he was busy…breaking a chair.

My eyes widened at that, but I didn't have the time to comment. Two arms fell heavily on my shoulders and I was suddenly squeezed between two dwarves.

"Amelia!" Kili happily exclaimed. "I'm glad you're feeling better." He whispered in my ear.

"You must have hit your head quite hard to confuse elves and Valars." Fili added, smirking teasingly at me.

"Poor Amelia." Kili dramatically sighed, his eyes alight with mischief.

"We thought we had lost you at that moment." Fili continued.

I rolled my eyes, trying to ignore their antics as I finally manage to wiggle my way out of their hug. I struggled to keep a smirk away from my features as I pointed an accusing finger at each of them.

"Don't try to charm me boys, your mother asked me to deliver something to each of you and there's no avoiding it."

I immediately saw their smirks disappear as they looked rather uncertain. Their entire behaviour changed. It was quite cute really. How old were they again? And to see that their mother still had such an impact on them... Yep. Really cute indeed.

"What…what is it?" Fili bravely asked.

I smirked and beckoned them both over. To their credit they only hesitated for a second before they did come closer. My smirk grew as I waited rather patiently for them to be close enough. Without waiting longer than was necessary, I swiftly slapped them both on the side of their heads, knocking them together. 'Knock some sense back into them if you have to' had been Dís' exact words. Mission accomplished. Well, at least this one was easy to do. Bringing everyone back alive, this would be trickier, but now wasn't the time to think about that.

Both Fili and Kili yelped, more in outrage than in pain, and looked at me with pouts on their faces.

"That's not fair!" Kili whined. "Mother wouldn't do that."

"Nope, she'd do worse." I retorted. "Do you want me to actually do what she would?"

His face turned white as he quickly shook his head and retreated to the back of the balcony. Fili hadn't said a word and was still rubbing the spot where his head had connected with his brother's. We were standing a bit away from the other and I was a bit surprised when he spoke.

"I'm glad you're here." He said softly.

That took me slightly aback. I honestly hadn't expected that.

"Really?" I couldn't help but doubt his words.

He pulled a face and shrugged.

"Well, I'm not glad you'll be in danger. But I'm glad you're with us. You'll be safe with us." He was speaking in a very low tone so I wasn't certain anyone could hear his words. "And…it wasn't right of us to leave you all without saying a word."

Oh, so this was an apology and a peace offering.

I smiled.

"I'm glad we're all safe." I replied just as softly. "I'll do my best not to hinder anyone, and to help you all."

He smiled and nodded.

"I'm sure you will." His smile turned rather teasing as he swooped an arm around my shoulder. "Besides, you're not the weakest member of our group." He added louder this time.

I quirked an eyebrow at him and couldn't help but smile a bit.

"I highly doubt that."

"No really." He insisted. "You haven't met him yet. Wait, where is…" he looked around before pointing someone I honestly hadn't seen before, who was currently standing quite away from the others. "There he is!"

My brain couldn't believe what my eyes were seeing.

"A child?!" I blurted out loudly enough to make several heads turn in our direction. "You're travelling with a child? Are you mad?!"

Everyone was looking at us and there was a second of eerie silence before laughs boomed from everywhere around me. I quickly glanced around. Bofur was holding his belly as he barked with laughter while Kili was leaning heavily on him. Bombur and Ori were laughing too, if a bit less loudly. Most of the others, and that included Dori, Nori, Gloin and Balin were chuckling with disbelief, even Bifur seemed to find my words very funny. Dwalin was shaking his head as if I had said the most stupid thing ever and the King and Oin just didn't pay attention to us all. Fili was barking with laughter, still holding on my shoulders as he shook with each laugh.

I felt my cheeks heat and I elbowed Fili in the ribs, which only served to make him laugh more.

I rolled my eyes and chose to ignore him. Instead I looked at the child who was now glaring at me, clearly offended by my words.

I couldn't really understand that because I honestly hadn't said anything weird.

I frowned and looked more closely to the weird child who was wearing different clothes than the ones I had seen until now.

His hair were curly and a dark, sandy blond. He was wearing some velvety looking clothes that seemed more fitted for some sort of nice house's lounge or library than for a trek in the wild. But what shocked me more was that he actually was barefoot. I opened my mouth to protest and tell my friends it really wasn't right to let a child walk around like this when my eyes actually informed my brain that something really weirder was going on.

I did a double take and ended up with my mouth hanging open as my gaze was locked on this boy's feet.

"Wha…" I actually managed to make two steps in the boy's direction before I blurted out the first words that pass through my mind. "Are those normal?"

The laughter around seemed to be stronger and I just didn't pay any attention to them. The boy seemed even more offended than before as I walked to him. Looking back up I startled violently when I finally realized that his face looked more adult-like than I had previously thought it was.

"What are you?" I said without thinking it through.

I was motionless as I observed his face turn red in obvious anger and he suddenly crossed his arms on his chest and glowered at me.

"I am a hobbit miss. A hobbit of the Shire and I would like it very much if you would please refrain on calling me a child again."

I blinked and opened my mouth again, ready to apologize to him as I hadn't intended on offending him, but he just quickly left the room, brushing past me without so much as a glance in my direction.

"Ha…" I looked around at the dwarves who were either still laughing or just simply talking together without paying attention to me anymore.

I stayed frozen on the same spot for a few seconds before I decided to walk to Ori. If I could trust someone to explain me a situation, it was Ori.

"What is a hobbit?" I asked without hesitation.

"They are a race of peaceful folk. I told you about them, remember? They leave east from the blue mountains, not too far from Archet actually." Ori explained with a kind smile. "They are smaller than us, even when they reach adulthood, which explains why you mistook him for a child."

I did remember something he had once said about some small folks leaving not too far from the Halls. But I had forgotten about it, or at least there was just no way I would have made the connections on my own.

"Who is he?" I looked at my friends, wondering what this man was doing here.

Nori who was nearby snorted and I looked at him.

"He's our burglar." He answered my question though I could tell from his smirk that he personally thought this was a joke.

"A burglar? Why do we need a burglar?"

"Well his job will be to enter Erebor and see whether the dragon is still alive, find an object or two." Bofur, who had finished destroying the furniture, supplied the information with a cheeky smile. "Or something like that." He winked at me.

"Right, because of course we don't know what await us at the end of this quest." I softly rumbled.

"No one asked you to come along." The King's voice snapped from behind me and I turned swiftly to face him.

We looked at each other for a short while but none of us decided to speak any more words on this topic. I ended up sighing loudly and lowering my gaze. There was no point in antagonizing the King more than I already had. Turning away once more I offered Ori a small smile before we both started to discuss again.

"So a hobbit who is a burglar." I softly said before frowning and looking at the kind dwarf. "What about…you know…his feet?"

"Oh, this is actually normal."

Alright. I thought I had seen a lot of weird things in this world already, but this topped it. I could get small folks who would mostly live in mines and be called dwarves. I could get tall and oddly pretty folks who would live in gorgeous places and be called elves. But oddly enough, smaller folks with freaky huge hairy feet, well that I had trouble to admit as normal.

I rubbed my forehead and sighed loudly.

"Are you alright?" Ori immediately worried.

"I think I'll just…" I didn't really know what to say after that. Looking at myself I remembered how Lindir had told me I could take a bath later and thought it actually would be a good idea. "I think I'll just go and take a bath, it'll do me a world of good."

He simply nodded as I smiled and without adding another word, I just left the dwarves and went back in the corridor.

Now though I had to find Lindir, or an elf, who could point me in the right direction. Surely this wouldn't be difficult to find, right?

* * *

><p>Almost one hour later I resented that thought. How was it possible to get lost in this place and not meet a soul? It was Thorin's Halls' maze all over again. I was getting tired of walking the small ways between high columns and windy rooms. I had seen beautiful gardens and impressive fountains, as well as breathtaking paintings and lifelike statues, but now I only wanted to relax in a warm bath. Surely it existed around here.<p>

What puzzled me most was that, so far, I had met no one. I thought I had seen the hobbit from afar, but by the time I arrived to the stairs I had spotted him on, he was long gone. Then I had gotten lost in the gardens.

In the end, and without realizing it, I had ended up going in the way opposite to the main buildings. I was now trying to go back in that direction.

After some more time I finally saw two elves who were discussing, one was sitting on a long wooden bench while the second was facing opposite to me. I walked up to them and they immediately turned my way when they heard me arrive.

I almost groaned when I recognized the rude elf from before. From what I could tell from the smirk on his face he didn't share the same sentiment.

"Well, isn't that the Lady Dwarf." He said on an even tone.

"My name is Amelia." I couldn't help but slightly snap back at him.

His smirk oddly grew and he seemed to observe me for awhile. At first I felt embarrassed and I avoided his gaze, but after a moment I got enough of his scrutiny and glared at him. He was being rude anyway so there was no point in trying to be polite. To my surprise, his smirk just grew some more until the second elf interrupted him.

"Glorfindel." She simply said with a small smile and I saw him change his behaviour immediately. "Lady Amelia, how may we help you?"

I looked at the woman. She had long dark hair and a pale, pretty face with beautiful kind eyes. I blushed a bit and felt suddenly rather shy.

"Ah, hem, I wanted to know, well…that is, Lindir told me I could go and ask him if I wanted to… well, erm, do you know where he is?"

The woman whose name I still didn't know nodded and kindly smiled.

"Of course, I believe Lindir is currently with my father. You will find him in the main house." She pointed at a direction to my right with a thin, pale hand. "That way. Do you require any help or escort to find your way?"

I honestly couldn't be certain that I would find the correct way, but I was just too uncomfortable in her presence, or in this other elf's, to say yes. So I shook my head and forced a smile on my lips.

"I'll be fine, thank you."

As I made my way towards the direction she had indicated, I finally met other elves. Well, by that I mean that I passed by them while trying to discreetly eye them. They were fascinating in my mind. One of them just needed to be nearby for my eyes to immediately look in their direction. It was honestly disturbing. I tried not to, because it made me feel like a creepy stalker, but there was apparently nothing I could do to avoid it. It was like a natural reaction, or so it felt.

At some point I just wanted to be with the dwarves again. With them I was normal, safe. With them I felt at ease. With the elves I was probably safe too…but I didn't feel at ease. I felt awkward, as if I shouldn't be here. As if my mere presence was disturbing the peace of these gardens.

I was once again lost in my thoughts when I heard a noise I couldn't mistake. The dwarves were nearby and were cheering loudly. What were they doing? I frowned slightly and walked in that direction. As I neared the noise I almost collided with two tall forms. Stepping away from them, I blushed yet again and looked up to realize I had almost knocked the lord of this place. Or at least I assumed he was.

"Lo…Lord Elrond, I'm sorry. I apologize for…"

"It's alright." He cut in with a movement of his hand to stop my words.

"Do you need anything Amelia?" Lindir, who was the second elf, asked with a kind smile.

I really wanted to ask where I could take a bath, but right then, I felt like I needed to see the dwarves more than anything. I had spent maybe two weird hours alone and half lost in this place and I just wanted a little bit of normality in my life. Oddly enough, dwarves were now what I thought to be normal. I didn't even take the time to ponder on this weird realization as I smiled at Lindir and shook my head and replied.

"No, I'm fine, thank you Lindir. I'm just going to go see my friends."

On those words I bowed my head slightly and quickly strode around them. My words seemed to have frozen them until they both turned and Lindir called me.

"Wait, Amelia, don't go there. The dwarves are…"

"I know they're there. Thank you." I cut in without paying attention to him.

I didn't even look back at him as I walked as quickly as I could in the direction of the voices. I completely ignored his cry of protest, I had no idea why he would want to stop me anyway. As I neared the place I looked up only to freeze on the spot.

For a second I stayed there, standing in the middle of the alley that led to a magnificent fountain…a magnificent fountain where my friends were currently bathing…

...bathing naked.

My eyes saw…and my brain took ages to actually register what was going on.

Some of them were playing together, splashing and pushing each other around in the fountain. Some other were jumping from a higher point into the basins. Some of them were starting to get out...Actually one of them was…

None of them had seen me…yet.

But I saw…

Oh dear Mahal!

I couldn't help but squeak loudly as my body finally reacted. I swiftly turned my back to them as I belatedly brought my hands over my eyes to cover them.

Suddenly all noise and cheers stopped and there was only the sound of trickling water to be heard.

For what seemed like an eternity there was nothing else but that sound until I heard several splashes and then a booming voice that yelled at me.

"Get out of here this instant!"

Yes Dori, of course Dori…

I wanted to reply something, but I just squeaked once more and more or less ran back the way I had come from. Only to meet with the carefully neutral faces of the elves that had waited for me…

"Can you show me where to bath please?" I whispered to Lindir without meeting his eyes.

He was kind enough not to make any comment as he nodded and gestured for me to follow him. During the whole way to the bath I kept looking at my feet, my face burning, and refused to say a word, except for a quick "thank you" to Lindir.

A short while later, as I tried to relax in the hot bath water, I thought about the quest I had joined. Well, at least the one thing I knew for sure was that it wouldn't be boring in the least.

I couldn't help but think back about the images now burned in my brain of my friends playing in the fountain…and Nori getting out of the water, his whole body…

I groaned loudly, a terrible blush spreading on my face, and sank under the water.

Nope…it would most certainly not be boring…

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><p><strong>AN:First things first, thanks to everyone who kindly reviewed last chapter :) Thanks a lot guys, it always means a lot.**

**Now I just want to say: Tadaaaaaa after so long I'm actually really, really nervous about how you will all react to this chapter. I truly hope you enjoyed it, that it wasn't too cheesy etc... Waiting so long to make them kiss actually built up a lot of pressure on me :P**

**Two more things before you close this window :P**

**First, for those who haven't seen it, I posted a short one shot last week. It's a companion piece to this fic. Inspiration just struck and that one shot got out of my brain. To answer to BookishOri's review: no this isn't a separate story, it's just a small insight in another POV. So everything said in the oneshot can be included in this fic here as well.**

**Second, I just created a poll on my profile. It'll stay on for awhile, so no pressure, but I'd like it if you just took the time to answer. The question is easy to answer :) Depending on the results, it might change the way this story will go in the future (I am undecided, and have several plot lines in my head. The results could help me to decide on one, so I count on you!)**

**Thanks again for your support! I hope you enjoyed this chapter ;)**


	45. When Night Falls

**Everything belongs to JRRTolkien, except the unrecognisable parts of the plot and the OC**

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><p>That evening, I avoided the dwarves like the plague. I could only hope they wouldn't be offended, though at the moment I believed that seeing me could actually be worse for everyone. I had only seen Fili and Kili from afar and both brothers had blushed a deep red before ducking quickly into another corridor. My face was probably still pink too when I met Dwalin. The strong warrior had glanced at me before starting to stammer some words I didn't catch. He had looked everywhere but at me and had then simply turned his back to me and left.<p>

I had been rather dumbfounded, standing in the empty corridor and watching Dwalin's back quickly disappear at the other end of it.

A few seconds had passed before I took the decision to carefully avoid the others for the rest of the evening at least. I was quite certain, if Fili, Kili and Dwalin's reactions were anything to go by, that they wouldn't try to find me. Or at the very least, they wouldn't without a very good reason.

I was now all alone in my room, trying hard not to think about the events that had occurred at that fountain…but damn some of them really were…

No Amelia. No. I really had to stop thinking about that. Though let's be honest, this wasn't the kind of image someone could forget easily, especially because I had been quite close and had unwillingly stared for quite awhile before reacting. This really wasn't how I wanted to think about some of these dwarves. Though, now that I had seen our King butt naked, he didn't seem quite so terrifying. It was a bit like this trick some students used when afraid to speak in front of a teacher, imagine him or her wearing underwear…well now, when our dear King would yell at me, I knew exactly what to picture in my mind.

I snorted at that thought before actually chuckling. I was certain he wouldn't like it, but for all his frowns and charisma, he couldn't wipe out my memories.

I blushed yet again as my thoughts turned back to Nori. I wished I could be with him right now, I honestly wanted to see him and talk to him. But even though I hadn't really been unhappy to witness the moment he went out of the bath, it would still make my brain freeze if I were to face him right this instant. For a second I let myself remember the picture of him starting to get out of the fountain. But then the image of Oin removing water from his ear trumpet made me choke back an uneasy chuckle. I groan as I felt my cheek slowly heat. I knew right then I was blushing strongly, yet again.

I sighed and lay back on my bed, trying to push away those thoughts. I closed my eyes for a second and tried to relax a bit. Had it only been a day since the dwarves freed me? It had been barely dawn when they found me, and we had arrived at the elves' place quite early in the morning.

The day had been full of emotions and had left me drained and tired. Still I couldn't quite relax. An uneasy feeling was settled in my chest, and it had absolutely nothing to do with the fountain's events. I frowned. I couldn't quite put my finger on what was bothering me. I tried some basic breathing exercises to calm me down, but nothing seemed to work. I was a bit nervous, that I could tell. Unable to sleep, I tried my hardest to pinpoint what exactly could make me feel like this.

It took me quite some time, though I hadn't really paid attention to the minutes passing, but I finally managed to put words on these odds feelings. The answer though, left me quite puzzled. Somehow I wasn't sure whether or not I should trust the dwarves. Would they tell me if they decided to leave in the night? Would they try to abandon me here? Would they actually dare leave in the night without saying a word to the elves, or to me?

I groaned. Ori had said we needed to stay here for a bit. I trusted Ori. But...but what if the others had lied to him? Or what if they had convinced him it was for the best to leave me here? Or what if…

I was exhausted. Those thoughts wouldn't get me anywhere. I knew that perfectly. Whatever the dwarves had planned or not, they would go through with it. I knew that much. I could only hope that whatever plan they had, they would include me. No, it wasn't a matter of hope. It was a matter of trust. Did I trust the dwarves? The answer was yes of course. I let out a long breath. I was tired. I wasn't really able to think logically right now. I was honest enough with myself to realize that those thoughts came from exhaustion more than actual doubts. I had to sleep. I needed to. But even if I was exhausted, I couldn't seem to relax enough.

I turned and turned in the bed until I sighed loudly for the umpteenth time. No, as strange as it was I wasn't comfortable at all here. The bed was amazing. The mattress was this perfect balance between soft and hard, the pillows were as fluffy as clouds, the sheets were soft and smelt like fresh grass. I could even hear the soft noises of a peaceful night to lull me into sleep.

Yet, I couldn't.

I was worried, anxious, restless.

Now that I thought about it the previous night I had been alone too, though I had been in a cage made of bones, waiting to be eaten. A cold shiver ran down my spine and I realized, startled, that my hands were shaking. I pressed my hands together as I sat, trying to control the shaking as cold sweat was starting to form on my back. I was shocked to find out that my breathing was starting to sound heavy and laboured. What was going on?

I shouldn't feel like this at the moment.

This place was nothing like the cage I had been thrown in.

The light of the moon shone coldly, still bright enough for me to see clearly the little room. It was nothing like the darkness of my prison. Instead of bare rock walls, I could see a small carved table and smooth walls with carved leaves decorating the ceiling. Instead of a putrid smell, I could only catch scents of fresh grass and flowers. Instead of rotting bones, I was sitting on a comfortable bed.

Rationally there was simply no way that the monsters, trolls they had called them, would come back. There was just no way that any monster could come here anyway. The elves would stop them.

Oddly enough, this didn't comfort me at all.

Didn't I trust the elves?

I swallowed thickly and tried to think about something else, even the picture of my friends bathing would be welcomed right then.

As I was about to try practicing some breathing exercises, I heard a noise. Something similar to a dry branch snapping. In my mind though, it brought me back to the prison where every move I made would make bones break and crack under my weight.

Immediately I pressed both my hands against my mouth as suddenly the fresh smell of the room was replaced by the putrid smell of my prison. My eyes were wide open. My gaze was darting quickly across the room, trying to find out where danger could come from. This room wasn't safe.

I had to get out of here.

I jumped to my feet, luckily I hadn't removed any layer of clothe because at this moment my mind was far from caring about decency. I bolted to the door and tried to open it. In my panic, I tried to pull it open, which obviously wouldn't work as I needed to push. But instead of logically trying something else, I kept on pulling at the handle, getting more and more afraid as seconds ticked by. The door was rattling quite noisily by the time something just snatched it away from my hold.

I froze on the spot.

For a second I honestly believed that the monsters were back.

Then I heard his voice and felt his arms around me as I fell in a heap on the floor.

"Amelia? What's going on? Amelia?"

My heart, I realized, was beating wildly and I had trouble breathing. I could tell I was still shaking and I probably was scaring Nori right now. I had to try and calm down. I could now, I was safe. If Nori was there, then I had nothing to be afraid of. Nori would protect me. Nori always protected me. He had been the one to save me from the dark prison. Once again he came and saved me.

"Nori? What's going on? What happened?" The worried voice belonged without a doubt to Dori.

I didn't look up though. My eyes, though they were wide open, were riveted to some point ahead of me and I wasn't really registering whatever information they sent to my brain. I wasn't able to pay attention to that right now.

"I don't know. The noise came from her door. She was trying to get out I think." Nori replied. "But there's nothing in this room." He added, probably after having looked around.

"Oy, what's the matter?" A third voice asked.

Apparently I had made enough noise to wake several dwarves. I was too out of it to feel ashamed or embarrassed though. A bit calmer now I looked up from my position, huddled in Nori's arms, to see Bofur, Dori and Bifur looking down at me. They remained silent, as if they were waiting for me to explain what had happened. It was probably the logical reaction to have.

I swallowed thickly.

I was able to talk now. Or so I thought. But what could I say? I insisted on following them on a dangerous quest and I couldn't deal with memories? That seemed preposterous. I wouldn't agree with someone like that following me on a suicidal mission, so why would they. Another type of fear entirely started to grow in my chest as I looked down, avoiding their gazes.

"Amelia?" Dori's soft voice sounded closer and a quick glance told me he had knelt next to me. "Amelia, tell us what happened. Are you alright now?"

I bit my lip and looked slightly upwards. I met Nori's grey eyes and the worry I saw in them decided me. I couldn't let him worry over me when it was my own stupidity that caused this.

"I just…it's the…" How to explain what had happened? "The monsters…"

I felt Nori's arms tightened around me as the four dwarves were immediately tense and looking around, readying themselves for any danger.

"N, no." I stammered. "The monsters…prison and, and bo, bones…"

They immediately relaxed and I could see understanding flash on their faces. I felt so stupid, so useless and weak.

"Amelia, they're dead." Dori said kindly, patting my arm.

I knew that. My brain was aware that the trolls were dead and that I was reasonably safe here. My body though was another matter altogether. The thought of being alone in the dark made me shudder. But how could I explain to him…

At this moment I was surprised to see Bofur shake his head and place a hand on Dori's shoulder.

"Dori, Nori" He said with a calm and serious voice. "Can you give us a moment with Amelia?"

I could tell that the two dwarves hesitated, but maybe it was the odd seriousness that Bofur displayed that convinced them. Thankfully I was able to bit back the whimper that threatened to escape my mouth when Nori's arms left me alone, on the floor in the dark. I shivered when I felt his fingers linger for a second on my back before he quickly stood. Almost immediately, Bifur crouched next to me and observed me for a second before he grabbed my arms, stood back up and in a swift move brought me to my feet. Slightly puzzled, I let him guide me back to the bed were the three of us sat.

Their presence wasn't as soothing as Nori's or Dori's, but at least I felt safe with them.

"Amelia?" Bofur's soft voice forced me to focus back on him. "You panicked, right?"

Even though it sounded like it, it wasn't really a question. I bit my lip and lowered my gaze. I didn't want to be left alone here, but in my mind there was simply no way that the dwarves would let someone so stupid and weak follow them.

I was forced to look back up when a heavy arm fell on my shoulder and pressed me against a strong chest. Bifur was looking straight ahead as he hugged me. His gesture had startled me. I was never sure what to expect with Bifur. I knew I surely hadn't expected him to hug me for example. Still I replied by hugging his middle and hiding my face against his chest. Sweet, incomprehensible Bifur.

"See Amelia, in our family we're quite used to this…situation." Bofur's voice was really soft, almost a murmur, as he calmly spoke. "The axe in his head isn't the only thing that hurt Bifur. Since that day, he's been suffering from a lot of…attacks and nightmares. At first it was almost every night. He would suddenly and without any apparent reason become agitated. Sometimes he even awoke and wielded his axes around as if to fight off enemies."

Gradually I forgot my problems and fears as I listened to Bofur's calm, even voice as he narrated what had to be a painful story to tell. I tightened my hold around Bifur's middle without really realizing it and kept on concentrating on Bofur's story.

"We didn't really know how to react, but we got used to it. Even now, Bifur's has trouble with some noises and some smells will bring him back to the attack. We have no idea why, it is just like that. It is partly the reason why Bifur don't go on missions anymore, we wouldn't want him to scare off little dwarfling when he wakes up shouting in Khuzdul because of a nightmare." He chuckled lightly at the end and I felt and heard Bifur huff in annoyance.

I looked up after leaning slightly away. Bifur looked down at me and I saw the corner of his eyes crinkle a bit. I couldn't really see because of his wild beard, but I guessed he was smiling so I offered him a tiny, slightly uncertain smile too.

"So I'm guessing your nightmares are about the trolls." Bofur said after a short silence.

I heard some ruffling around so I looked at him and saw that he was just about to light his pipe. Soon, the smell of the weeds and smoke rose and, even though I had never particularly enjoyed it, I took a deep inhale. Oddly enough, this smell finished the job of calming me. It smelt like home, when Nori and Dori would light their pipes and smoke in front of the chimney while Ori and I would read. I smiled gratefully at Bofur and nodded.

"Guessed as much." He grunted. "Care to explain a bit more what happened? It might help to point out what started it."

I took some time to think back and unease was starting to come back when Bofur's voice once again brought me back to reality.

"Everything's fine lass. We're here."

I breathed deeply and cleared my voice.

"I don't know. I was…I was just trying to sleep, but I don't know, it didn't feel right. I think, well at first, I think I was afraid you would all leave without me." Bofur snorted at that but didn't comment. "But then I started to think that I was alone here, and that I would be alone if you left…and I remembered that I was alone when…" my voice broke slightly and I just stopped, unable to voice those fears.

"We won't leave you here. I'll be honest lass, we don't like that you're with us. This quest is dangerous and we don't know what awaits us. We just know that what we did until now was the easy part of the journey. We'll need to cross mountains and forests before we arrive in Erebor and once there…who knows what we'll find?"

Bifur blurted a few words in Khuzdul right then and Bofur chuckled.

"Right, he said we should trust you more." The kind dwarf translated and I felt happy that at least one of them wouldn't mind too much that I was there.

Bifur spoke some more and it actually made Bofur laugh before he told me.

"Well, and you're in for intense training with Bifur for the time we're stuck here."

I didn't know whether I should be happy with that or not, but I nodded and smiled at Bifur who just grunted and went back to stare at the door.

"Nah, we won't leave without you lass. Don't worry about that." Bofur said still chuckling before he became serious again. "But I think you shouldn't stay in this room. Seems obvious to me that being alone triggered it. If you're with us, maybe we can avoid the attacks at least."

But I won't be able to avoid the nightmares I finished for him in my mind. Well, after what had happened, I could tell that nightmares would be rather terrifying. I shivered slightly and almost instantly Bifur hugged me closer to him. I smiled despite my fears.

"Thanks guys." I finally managed to whisper.

I knew they heard me, even though I had spoken very softly, because both of them grunted. Well, Bifur grunted, Bofur hummed.

We stayed there for awhile more, simply sitting in silence until I could sincerely say that I was feeling better. At some point Bofur just nodded, stood up and stretched before he emptied his pipe through the window. I felt much more at ease now than I had been before and I didn't even hesitate before asking him the question that had been bugging me for awhile.

"Bofur, why do you guys behave like this here?"

"What do ya mean?" He asked without looking at me while he pocketed his pipe.

I frowned and tried to clarify my thoughts.

"Well, you are all behaving oddly. You're different here. What is it that you hate so much about the elves?"

Bifur grunted and muttered something incomprehensible to me.

"Elves aren't as friendly as they might seem." Bofur snorted.

"Except for maybe a few exceptions, I found them quite nice and polite." I disagreed softly and peered at him through my eyelashes. "Can't say the same about you guys."

Bofur sighed loudly and scratched his head before he looked at me.

"You don't know the whole story Amelia." He simply said with a shrug.

"What's the whole story?"

"The whole story is long, sad and rather not the kind of story I wish to tell right now. You should sleep Amelia, you need it."

It was odd to see Bofur behave quite so seriously, but I liked this side of him too. No one could always be just cheeky and happy. I sighed though at his words. Looking back at the bed, I just knew I didn't want to stay here. I didn't want to sleep alone in this bed. It was silly, but I was scared. What was worse is that I was scared of having another panic attack at the moment. I bit my lip and nodded forlornly. The dwarves needed to sleep probably as much as I did anyway and it wasn't fair to ask them to stay awake just because I was too afraid to relax.

Bifur stood while I remained on the spot.

"Come on Amelia, let's go."

Bofur's voice and words forced me to look up at him. He was standing near the door and just about to open it as he gestured for me to follow him. My surprise was probably visible enough for him to smile and explain himself.

"Told you lass, we're not gonna leave you behind and you shouldn't be alone. Come now, I'm tired too and I need my beauty sleep."

I smiled at that and even chuckled as I stood up and followed him through the door.

In the corridor I immediately spotted Dori and Nori. It took me just a glance to realize something wasn't quite right. They were once again behaving oddly. Dori had his arms crossed over his chest and was glaring at the wall, facing away from his brother. Immediately my eyes noticed a lot of small details about Nori who was sitting on the floor, one knee bent and his other leg stretched out in front of him. As the door opened he instantly looked up but instead of looking at his eyes, I looked at him. I could almost immediately spot the tense shoulders, the thin line of his lips, the clenched fists that all indicated that something had happened between him and Dori. Clearly words had been exchanged and Nori hadn't liked what he had heard.

When he saw me though, his behaviour changed in a heartbeat. He swiftly stood up and quirked an eyebrow at me. I saw from the corner of my eyes that he had barely managed to stop one of his hand to reach up in my direction. I wanted nothing more than go to him and hide my face in the nook of his neck. I wanted him to hold me and tell me that everything would be alright.

I refrained to do so though. I knew that, even though I now was certain my feelings weren't one sided, we still had to be discreet. Why? I had honestly no idea. But both our reactions earlier had been instinctual and it felt right not to display anything right now. It probably was the hardest thing I had to do at this very moment. I wanted nothing more than be in his arms, than let him soothe me. I met his eyes and my heart leapt in my ribcage.

I could tell from the heat and worry in his grey gaze that my feelings were reciprocated.

It was simply torture to be a few meters away from him right now, without being able to actually go to him.

I was about to give in when his eyes flashed towards Dori who was now walking quickly towards us.

I quirked an eyebrow before I frowned.

I needed to talk to Nori.

As that thought crossed my mind, Dori's strong arms engulfed me in a bear hug that took my breath away.

"Amelia, how are you feeling? Are you alright? Were you hurt somewhere? Do we need to wake Oin?"

From above his shoulder I locked my gaze with Nori's. The thief was probably just as worried as his brother right now. I really had scared him with my little stunt.

"I'm sorry." I said, my eyes boring into Nori's, my words for him more than the others. "I'm fine. I really am. Don't worry."

He inclined his head slightly and, had I not been paying attention, I probably would have missed this movement. Still he seemed to relax quite significantly, which was not the case for the oldest brother.

"Are you sure? If you need anything you know you can tell me, right? Being on this quest doesn't change the fact that I'm your guardian."

The way he said this last part made me pause. His voice had been slightly different and as I saw Nori tense, I realized that Dori had said that as much for me than for his brother. I was puzzled by this. I had never questioned the fact that Dori and Balin were my guardians. It was a fact I accepted, I even was grateful for it.

As I was thinking about this, Bofur reassured Dori that I was fine and I was glad he didn't go into too many details. I was tired and I really wanted to forget about this embarrassing reaction. After awhile, Dori finally agreed to free me from his hug and guided me toward the balcony were the others were probably asleep.

When we passed the doors, my gaze almost immediately fell on the King who had a deep frown on his face. As I started to get nervous, memories from earlier thoughts popped in my mind and I just couldn't help it. I remembered the events of that day and instantly felt my face heat up. Seeing my blush seemed to startle our King who for a second lost his countenance and then shifted awkwardly before looking elsewhere.

Damn.

That worked like a charm…even if it was probably as embarrassing for me as it was for him.

Thankfully none of the others were awake at the moment and Bofur, Bifur and Dori hadn't realized anything was amiss. Clearly, the fact that I had awoken them because of a panic attack had been enough to make us all forget about the fountain. Bofur actually gave my shoulder a kind pat before he waved and left for the other side of the room where I guessed his bunk was. Bifur followed him after grunting slightly and nodding at me.

Meanwhile Dori guided me toward a form lying on the floor that I recognized as Ori. In a few minutes and without making that much noise, Dori helped me rearrange some blankets into a bunk where he gestured for me to lie.

I would be honest.

I had hoped to be able to sleep next to Nori. I wanted to for various reasons, some more logical and some only related to my feelings for him. But I felt that explaining that to Dori probably wasn't the best idea I could have at the moment. Silently, and slightly reluctantly, I lied back between Ori and Dori.

At that moment, Nori came in with my bag and I sat up quickly as he came nearer. Wordlessly he handed me my travel blanket.

Our eyes met as I looked up at him and our hands brushed when I took the blanket from him.

I could feel my heart beating faster as I wanted nothing more than stand up and go somewhere private where we could talk. Well…talk and cuddle…I needed a cuddle right now. As Dori shifted next to me, Nori glanced at his brother, breaking the contact between our eyes and just like that he left to go to the other side of the room.

I laid back but even from where I lay I could still see him. I didn't know whether he had done this on purpose, but anyway I was glad for it. He sat on a bench that was on the other side of the balcony and from which he probably had a good view of the gardens, though I knew he didn't care for that. His back was against one of the rare pillar and his legs were stretched on the bench. I saw him cross his arms and he seemed to simply fall asleep. Maybe he was asleep, maybe he simply remained immobile. I couldn't tell.

I closed my eyes.

I was feeling much better. I wasn't on the verge of a panic attack anymore, but something was still not right. I forced myself to lay still and tried to wait for sleep. I was tired, exhausted really, and I actually wanted to sleep. But something seemed to stop me from peacefully doing so.

For the second time that night I started to turn restlessly on my bed. I tried to concentrate on the noisy snores that came from various dwarves, though Bombur probably was the loudest, but even the knowledge that I wasn't alone wasn't enough to calm me completely.

Slowly, exhaustion finally won the battle against my buzzing mind and I fell into a restless sleep.

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><p>I jolted, suddenly awake.<p>

My breathing was laboured and I could feel that my cheeks were wet from tears. I couldn't remember what had awoken me or what I had been dreaming of. The only things I knew for certain were that it was still the middle of the night and that I hadn't awakened anyone else involuntarily.

I let out a shaky breath as I started to shiver.

Rolling on my other side I let my eyes drift in the direction where Nori had been earlier.

I shouldn't have been surprised to meet grey eyes that observed me with obvious concern.

Slowly I shifted until I was sitting on my bunk. I rubbed my forehead several times before I looked back in Nori's direction. He had moved too and was now standing, leaning against the pillar next to the bench where he had probably tried to sleep. I wanted to go to him. I needed to be close to him. I locked my gaze to his, trying to find something, anything that would help me to take a decision.

It was really strange. I had always relied heavily on Nori. He had always been my anchor. He was the first person I thought of when I wanted to share good news or my most hidden fears and doubts. He had been my best friend, my confident. He had been my protector. He had hurt me more than the others, but he was the only one able to actually soothe me, to help me forget about pain. For more than a year and a half now, he had been the most important person in my life.

So why was it that now I knew about his feelings, or at least part of them, why instead of being appeased and at ease, why did I need him even more? Why?

I saw him take half a step in my direction and I realized that a few tears had rolled down my cheeks. Quickly I wiped them off with my sleeve before I stood up as stealthily as I could.

I concentrated on where I was putting my feet, I didn't want to stupidly step on a dwarf right now. It took me ages to cross that stupid balcony, but after what was objectively a short time, I was finally standing just in front of Nori.

Maybe it was because of the weak flickering light of the dying fire, but Nori's eyes seemed to shine with untold emotions right now and I briefly wondered if mine were the same.

Slowly his hand rose to my cheek.

I closed my eyes and sighed softly when his thumb caressed my cheekbone.

Opening my eyes once more I took the last step that separated me from his arms.

He clearly didn't hesitate as he embraced me tightly. I encircled his waist and hugged him just as fiercely. I hid my face against his shoulder and shut my eyes. Feeling his arms around me was already enough to settle my fears. For awhile we didn't say a word. Motionless we stayed silent as minutes ticked by. Letting my nose brush against his beard I recognized the scent I now associated to him. I felt safer in his arms than anywhere else. A few minutes with him had better results than half an hour with Bofur and Bifur. It might be cruel and unfair for the others, but I didn't care.

I loved Nori.

He would never be the same as the others. He would never be just one of them. He was Nori. My sneaky, cheeky thief.

I felt him move slightly until I felt his lips on my temple.

It made me smile.

Slowly I opened my eyes and looked slightly up to meet his eyes. He kindly smiled at me and my heart swelled with affection and love for him. I loved his smile. Oh, I adored his cheeky smirk too, because it was just another part of him, but I loved his smiles more. Once again he brought his right hand up to caress the scar on my cheek before he actually forced me to move away. Instead of pushing me back though, he grabbed my wrist and tugged lightly on my arm as I looked at him. He winked and gestured for me to stay silent.

With a smile edged on my lips I nodded and followed him to wherever he wanted to lead me.

Slowly we made our way to the doors. Nori managed to open them noiselessly and I quickly stepped out of the balcony into the dark and silent corridor. I was amazed to find out that Nori closed the door without making a sound. His stealth always surprised me. It was maybe silly, but I couldn't help it. In this aspect, he was so different from most of the other dwarves. I wondered where he wanted to go now, but I remained silent as he guided me further away from the corridor. We crossed one garden and passed through high archways. We walked in silence until we arrived next to a small garden with high bushes all around it. From the outside, we couldn't see what awaited us on the other side of the bushes. As we entered the hidden garden, I saw it had a small, round pond in the middle. There was the statue of a woman in the middle of the pond and water slowly trickled from the bowl she held in her arms.

Still following Nori, we stepped in the garden until we were standing next to the pond.

I glanced around for a moment until I noticed that Nori was looking at me. I felt myself blush a bit and, to avoid any embarrassment, I just decided to sit. Apparently Nori thought it was a good idea as he imitated me. We leant against the stone edge that circled the pond. Nori placed his left arm around my shoulder before bringing me closer to him. I was more than happy to comply as I snuggled as close to him as possible.

We remained silent for a few minutes until he spoke softly.

"Will you tell me what is upsetting you?"

I had placed my left hand against his chest, right above his heart. When I heard his words, I unconsciously clutched his tunic tightly. Still, if I had been able to say a few words to Bofur and Bifur, I knew I would have more than enough strength to talk to Nori. Talking to him had never been an issue after all.

Taking a deep breath, I nodded and tried to think about where I should start. The events' beginning was probably a good idea…

"You know, when we realized that you were all gone, I mean, when I was alone at home…it wasn't right. It didn't feel right." I wasn't sure where I wanted to go with this start but well, I had to continue. "It's not right when I'm not with you." I didn't precise what I meant by that. "So, even though I kinda knew it was a bad idea, I left too. I guessed I failed to find you all." I chuckled humourlessly.

Nori was silent but I could feel his hand slowly drawing soothing circles on my shoulder. I closed my eyes an instant, savouring the feelings, before opening them back again. The simple gesture was enough to give me some courage.

"The monsters…the tro…trolls, they terrified me." I admitted with a shudder. "They didn't exist where I come from. They…" I bit my lower lip anxiously before shifting so that I could look into his eyes. "Nori, I really thought they would kill me. I really thought they would eat me, roast me like..." My voice broke.

In a swift move Nori brought me close to his chest. After a bit of shifting I ended up on his lap as both his arms were holding me as close to him as physically possible. I let him sooth me like he always did. One of my hands was close to his collar and my nose was once more hidden near his beard. As he started to hum lowly, I tried to let the peace of the moment wash over me. I concentrated on his deep voice, on the soft tune of the Khuzdul lullaby he was softly humming in my ear. I felt one of his hands gently rub my back and I sighed.

After a while I turned my head enough so that I could speak again.

"I keep on seeing them, hearing them. Nori, I know they're dead. I know I'm safe here, with you, but I just…I'm…" How difficult could it be to say those words? "I was alone in there. Completely alone, waiting for them to come and eat me." Tears were now rolling on my cheeks, and some disappeared in Nori's beard. "Nori" I whispered. "I don't want to be alone. Don't leave me alone."

"I won't. I swear Mizimul. I swear." His voice sounded as broken as mine at this moment as we held each other.

Only now could I really think and realize that seeing my garbs in the trolls' hole had probably terrified him too. He had most likely for an instant be certain of my death. If I tried to imagine what I would feel if I found such evidences of his demise... I shuddered at the simple thought.

"You're not alone Umzam." He repeated again.

After awhile I calmed down and let my hand trail on Nori's beard. I wasn't embarrassed of doing it. I had kissed him, how embarrassing could it be to just touch his beard? Following my own logic I was happy to finally let my fingers graze the complex braids and the cold, metallic beads that were masterfully carved into intricate designs.

Nori seemed not to mind, or so I thought until he actually spoke again.

He cleared his throat before muttering.

"Must you really do that?"

Without looking at him I smiled before replying.

"Yup. I love your beard. It's so pretty."

He groaned, which made my smile grew some more.

"Please, don't use that word." He complained with a sigh.

Amused, I glanced at him and quickly leant in his direction to place a quick peck on his cheek, just where his beard started. I couldn't see properly, but I was quite sure he actually blushed a bit. Still he sighed once more but it didn't sound annoyed. Then only he let his head fall on mine and he didn't say anything else while I kept playing with his braids.

"Nori?" I whispered some time later. "You don't want the others to…to know about…"I bit my lip, unable to finish the sentence and just waited for him to reply.

He started to rub circles on my shoulder again before he answered.

"I'm sorry Mizimul, but right now I can't." I frowned, unsure of what he meant. "I shouldn't." He seemed to be looking for his words, which was unusual for him. "I shouldn't have done that, I shouldn't even be here alone with you. It's not right."

I immediately guessed he was about to push me away. Instead of thinking about the sharp pain in my chest, I concentrated on the first problem; forcing him to stay.

"Don't you dare move." I said sternly, effectively stopping him just as he was about to push my shoulders away from him.

I was starting to feel hurt and angry. Why should it be complicated? Why? I loved him. I was quite certain he liked me a lot at least, or so I hoped. Why should it be complicated then? Why?

Taking a deep breath I gathered all my courage.

"Nori, I don't care about anything else right now, so just answer one question." I swallowed thickly before asking him what I wanted to know. "Do you regret … this?" I gestured between the two of us.

His answer was instantaneous.

"Never."

I didn't need anything else at that second.

Turning to face him, I placed my left hand on his cheek and without further ado I kissed him. I just pressed my lips to his, waiting for him to move, to do something, anything. He almost immediately brought one hand to the back of my head and kissed me back. Quickly the kiss deepened. His tongue sweetly teased my lips until I parted them. Soon it was stroking mine as I let my hands link at the back of his head, my fingers tangling in his hair. Angling my head a bit I couldn't stop a moan to rise from my throat as I felt his hand massage lightly the back of my neck.

Quickly the position became uncomfortable and I had to move slightly away from him so I could change it. He groaned and bit my lower lip as I did so. It sent sparks down my spine and for a second I forgot what I was trying to do. I let out yet another moan as I placed my hands on his shoulders. I ended up straddling him and once more let our tongues meet. His second hand immediately pressed against my lower back so that we were once more flush against each other. My hands were running from his shoulder to his back, from his neck to his hair, I needed to be closer to him, to touch him more.

I couldn't get enough of him as I pressed my chest to his while he angled away and started to kiss and lick my throat.

Oh Mahal.

I bit my lower lip to stop another, louder moan to escape my mouth and closed my eyes tightly.

He alternated between quick and slow stroke with his tongue, with small pecks and open mouthed kisses and my skin was on fire. I hadn't known until then how sensible this part of my body could be.

I arched my back without even noticing it. Both his hands were now on my hips, his fingers digging in my flesh, as I kept my eyes closed, letting the sensation wash over me. Rather suddenly his lips left my throat but I could still feel his warm breath against my skin. It sent shivers of pleasure down my spine.

I looked back at him then.

His eyes truly seemed to shine. The grey had turned darker and the sheer need in his gaze made my breath hitch. His mouth was slightly open as he breathed heavily and I couldn't help but follow the movement of his tongue as it quickly darted on his lips. I was just about to kiss him again when he decided to speak. Right then I cursed him silently.

"I don't regret anything. But this," One of his hands left my hip to gesture between us. "Is not right. Mizimul, as much as I want it, I can't right now ask anything, and without your guardians' approval, this," again with the gesture I was already starting to hate. "cannot be right."

I frowned deeply and, while his words registered in my brain, I sat on his thigh, as I was still straddling him. Looking directly in his eyes I knew how serious he was.

"Are you seriously telling me that you want to go through all the dwarves' traditions?"

"I don't want to. I have to." He murmured and it was easy to discern the pain in his tone.

I felt a pang of sadness and anxiety. I swallowed back the lump in my throat and felt my fingers cling tightly to Nori's tunic. I took a long breath, attempting to calm the sudden worries that these simple words had awoken in me.

"Nori," I softly whispered. "You do realize I'm human, right?" I said calmly before my fears turned into anger for half a second. "I don't have the time for your bloody traditions."

"I know that!" He almost snapped at me but strangely enough, I didn't take it personally. "I know that Mizimul, but I don't have a choice right now." His hand cupped my cheeks and he started to caress my skin with his thumb.

I tilted my head a bit against his hand, pressing closer to him as I tried to make sense of what was going on. There was only one excuse that could be used against him. Always the same one, the one I had never cared about, as oddly as it was.

"Is it because you're a thief?" I asked softly.

He sighed loudly and removed his hand from my face to rub his eyes tiredly.

"Yes and no. I…I am not currently considered a good, honourable dwarf."

"But you know how I feel about that, right? And in the end, shouldn't my opinion prevail on anyone else's?"

The silence between us wasn't really a comfortable one this time. I felt some sort of weight settle on my chest, making it more difficult for me to breathe.

"Can I ask you to be patient, at least until the end of this journey?" He asked without looking at me. "If we…if we retake Erebor then maybe, maybe I'll have a better status. Maybe then…"

My heart broke a little at seeing him like this. He looked ashamed of himself and it wasn't right. It wasn't right at all.

At that moment I took a minute to honestly think about all this.

We were both clearly attracted to one another. I was fairly sure his feelings were as strong as mine. The potential problem, in my opinion, didn't lay there though. We were in the middle of a dangerous quest. A dangerous quest that I personally found slightly stupid and suicidal but that clearly was more important than anything else for these dwarves. Erebor was their kingdom. It was their place. It was their home and it had been taken away from them.

This quest was important.

Even though only a dozen of dwarves were here, I was quite certain than more of them were still dreaming of Erebor.

Yes, this quest was important.

Looking at Nori I knew he wasn't following the King just because he had been asked to. I could see in all these dwarves that they were here because of their loyalty, probably because of the riches at the end too, but mostly they wanted their home back.

No matter how I felt, this quest was more important than my feelings.

If I were to just bluntly tell everyone that I wanted to be with Nori right now, I could predict some tension within the group. I wasn't certain who or why, but Nori's hesitations and doubts had to be based on something. So it meant some dwarves were against us being together. I frowned at that thought. My presence here was already creating some problems and it would be stupid to worsen the situation when it could be avoided. If Nori was so persuaded that it would not be appreciated, then I had to trust him on that.

Now the only choice I had was whether or not I cared about what the others thought.

It didn't take me long to find the answer to that question.

I cared about those dwarves. This quest was important to them, so it was to me too. I was here because I couldn't stand not knowing what was happening to them, I couldn't stand waiting alone for them to come back, or not. I hadn't lied when I said I was here to help. I would help in any way I could in the completion of this quest.

Nori hadn't moved and was looking away as he waited for me to answer his question. I could tell by the tensed lines on his face that he was already imagining I wouldn't agree with him. It was painful to see him doubt himself, and me, in such a way. I couldn't fathom why he wouldn't be confident about us. Was it so unbelievable that I might actually be in love with him? I couldn't let him wait any second longer, it would be nothing short of cruel to do so.

Wordlessly I cupped his cheek and forced him to look at me.

"I will wait until the end of this quest, because right now I'm quite sure everyone has other more important things to think about than whether or not I can be with you. I will wait before we talk about it to the others." I was glad to see some tension leave him as I said those words. "But Nori I have no intention of not being with you. I don't mind being discreet, I don't mind hiding it, but make no mistake, whether or not the others agree I don't care. If they can't accept it, fine, we'll deal with that when the time comes."

"It's not as simple." He started to protest before I cut in.

"I don't care." I enunciated clearly. "It is that simple. Unless you want to make it complicated, it is that simple Nori. Unless you're the one who changes his mind, it is that simple." I repeated the words and I couldn't be sure whether I believed them, or was trying to convince myself.

I let my forehead touch his and closed my eyes. A few minutes passed before I felt a small smirk tug at my lips.

"Or are you afraid you'll be caught, thief?" I teased him lightly.

My heart leapt when I heard him chuckle. His hands were once more on my back and one of them just went up to my shoulder, then my throat to finally end up cupping my cheek. He forced me to lean back a bit so we could lock our gazes.

"Is that a challenge Umzam?" He was smirking tenderly.

"Only if you want it to be, thief." I replied in the same way.

"Then a challenge it is." He concluded before kissing me once more.

This time though, it was a soft kiss. The heat from the earlier one had disappeared. Right now, the only thing that mattered was that we were together.

After having spent awhile just alternating between cuddling and kissing, Nori once more chose to be the serious one.

"We should go back. If one of them wakes up, we'll be in trouble. And you need to sleep."

I nodded, even though I honestly wanted to stay here with him.

I reluctantly stood up and, as he swiftly got back to his feet, I looked one last time at the small garden. The moonlight was basking the statue in a soft light, creating a peaceful atmosphere. I felt Nori tug lightly on my hand and without looking back, I followed him. Slowly we made our way back to the corridor. We were silent as we walked. This time though instead of holding my wrist, Nori was holding my hand. I smiled as I intertwined our fingers. Without even seeming to think about it, he started to caress my knuckles with his thumb. It made me smile. I wished the moment didn't have to end. But it did.

We both stopped a few steps away from the door.

"I was serious Mizimul, I shouldn't be with you. Not now, not like this." He didn't look at me as he spoke.

"And I was serious too, Nori. I'll wait, and we'll hide. I don't mind." I squeezed his hand, trying to communicate how unlikely it was for me to let go of him over such silly reasons.

"Umzam…"

"Nori, just…" I tried to find a way, anything really, that would made him relax on this topic but nothing came to my mind.

It was all so different than anything I had heard about. The dwarves had really odd traditions, and I knew already that I wouldn't be able to adapt to most of those. Right now though, I really didn't want to think about it anymore. I wanted Nori to understand I was serious about us being together, but that I respected his will of being discreet for awhile at least. I took a second before words formed in my mind and I finally spoke.

"During the day you'll just be Nori, my friend and my guardian's brother. But when the night comes…" I took a slow, slightly shaky breath before continuing. "When the night comes, you'll be my Nori, my cheeky thief, alright?" I squeezed his hand once more.

I looked at him and it scared me to see him hesitate. Our gazes met and I could tell he probably was just as worried as me. Slowly, he caressed my cheek and it was easy to see several emotions battle against each others in his eyes. During an excruciatingly long moment, I was unsure of what he would say. Maybe he would just give up. He surely seemed to hesitate quite a lot.

Finally he let his hand fall back at his eyes and shook his head.

He had taken a decision and I could only hold my breath, waiting to know what he would say.

"Alright…" He breathed out before softly leaning forward and kissing my temple. "I will."

As he walked to the door he let go of my hand.

We had enjoyed our time together, alone in our own world, but it was time to go back to the real world now. I didn't know how to feel about that.

As I lied back on my bunk between Ori and Dori, I gave a last glance in Nori's direction. We exchanged a smile before he sternly stared at me and gestured for me to sleep. My smile grew a bit but I turned my back to him and closed my eyes.

I felt more at peace than I had in awhile. Some heavy weight had disappeared from my chest without me noticing it. I was simply happy. Of course the fact that we would have to hide was annoying, but I understood why we had to do it.

I did wonder though…

I could remember a discussion I had with Balin and Danà. He had told me to speak with her, he hadn't seemed particularly angry then. Danà had said some dwarves knew about my feelings for Nori. I had no idea who though, and I didn't know to what extent they knew. Balin was probably one of them, but was he the one who disagreed? Who else knew? Did they think I had just a crush or had they really guessed it all? Why would anyone disagree to the two of us being together? Why should it matter? From hazy memories I remembered something about what Bombur had told me, something about the family having a say in the matter. But I had no family here, unless you considered Balin and Dori my family. Was kin the same thing as family? In that case it added Danà, Gloin and Oin to the mix. Did any of them disagree to Nori and me being together? It couldn't be Danà, she had…

My trail of thoughts was stopped when something hit my head lightly.

It didn't hurt and I guessed it was a pebble or something similarly small. Still I didn't understand where it could have come from. Looking up I met Nori's stern gaze once again. He gestured for me to sleep and I rolled my eyes.

How could this damn dwarf tell that I hadn't been asleep? I wasn't moving that much, was I?

Biting my tongue to avoid grumbling I shifted on my bunk and finally gave in and sighed loudly.

The damn thief couldn't know what I had been thinking about, but he was smart enough to guess properly. Begrudgingly I admitted to myself that thinking about all those questions probably wouldn't solve the issue. Right now, the best thing I could do was rest and train so that I wouldn't slow the dwarves down when we'll resume our journey.

This time, when my eyes closed, I fell asleep almost immediately.

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><p><strong>AN Thanks everyone for the reviews :) **

**It was really amazing to read them and I was relieved to see no one seemed disappointed. **

**I wanted to update sooner, but to be honest, I just didn't have the time. But well, I hope you enjoyed the chapter. I wanted to add a bit more about Bifur and Bofur, and I didn't want to only show the cheeky side of Bofur, so I hope no one was bored by the first part of this chapter. As for the second part, of course I had to put a bit of Nori and Amelia. Not too cheesy I hope?**

**Thanks as well for the people who voted on the poll. It is still active and will remain so for at least a couple more chapters (so probably a month or so) after that, I'll close it and will probably take into account the results. So if you have a look and you're not happy with what's going on, please vote (or put your answer in a review if you don't have an account, I'll note your opinion too)**

**Thanks a lot everyone :)**


	46. An Unexpected Reaction

**It all belongs to JRRTolkien**

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><p>The following morning I woke up only when someone decided to shake my shoulder lightly. Opening my eyes proved difficult as I hadn't had nearly enough sleep. I turned the other way and tried to grumble something akin to "leave me alone". Clearly I didn't make a good job at it because the annoying person just shook me more forcefully.<p>

My back felt sore and I groaned slightly, hoping I could still steal a few more minutes of peace and quiet before I had to face the day. Reluctantly I opened my eyes and pushed the hand away as I sat on my bunk. Rubbing my sleep heavy eyes I yawned loudly and stretched before I actually decided to look around. I was the only one who had still been asleep. Around me I could see a few dwarves, but most of them were nowhere in sight.

"It's already late and you didn't have breakfast." Ori softly said. "So you should at least wake up for lunch."

I nodded absentmindedly while I scratched my head.

"It's fine." I said before yawning again. "Where are the others?"

"Training." Ori replied evenly. "Dwalin wanted to wake you, but Dori convinced him to let you skip it this morning at least."

That explained why I could only see Balin, Oin and Bombur around with Ori. To my knowledge, they didn't train, though I was certain they would hold their ground like any dwarf during a fight.

"How are you feeling this morning?" Oin's gruff voice forced me to focus back on my surroundings.

"I'm fine, I just had trouble sleeping last night." As I spoke, I once again stretched my arms above my head, trying to make the soreness disappear.

The old healer nodded and handed me a small leather pouch.

"Take one spoon in warm water tonight." He simply instructed.

A quick check told me it was a simple mix of chamomile and lavender. I smiled softly, why didn't I think of that yesterday? I placed the pouch in my bag and finally walked to the edge of the balcony. Rivendell truly was magnificent. The sight was one I hoped not to forget any time soon. I was so busy contemplating it, that I jolted a bit when a hand touched my shoulder.

"How are you this morning my dear?" Balin kindly asked.

"I'm fine Balin, don't worry." I smiled softly, wondering silently how many times I would have to repeat those exact same words.

He smiled back before he looked away. I quirked an eyebrow and kept observing him as his behaviour seemed to change radically into one I had never seen him display before. He cleared his throat several time and seemed uneasy. Clearly something was on his mind, but I wasn't sure what to expect until he finally asked in a low voice.

"How do you feel after yesterday?"

I frowned slightly, unsure about what the meaning of his question was.

"I just panicked a bit Balin, but it's alright." I replied, hoping he wouldn't use my panic attack as an argument to leave me here.

He seemed even more uncomfortable and cleared his throat once more.

"Well, that sort of reaction is understandable. You're still young." He nodded. "But as a human, you're probably old enough to talk about that."

"Well, I talked with Bifur and Bofur." I said hesitantly, I wasn't sure what he had meant by that exactly.

"With Bif…" He exclaimed, obviously shocked, before coughing loudly.

This reaction baffled me but I patted him on the back, trying to figure out what I had said that might have triggered this.

"Amelia." He finally breathed deeply and turned to face me once again. "This is not appropriate at all." He was deadly serious as he spoke.

"What?" I hadn't expected that sort of answer. "What do you mean inappropriate? We just talked about it."

"Well, I should hope so!" He huffed, his eyes wide. "Amelia, you shouldn't talk about such things with someone who isn't your guardian, or at the very least a female kin."

"Wait, what?" That didn't make any sense at all. "I talked about these sorts of things with others before, you never complained." I didn't understand what the problem was.

"With others? Complained?" Balin's white eyebrow furrowed as he looked at me sternly. "Amelia, I don't think it wise of you to discuss such matters so randomly."

I was completely flabbergasted as I looked at him.

"Balin, it's only nightmares, well and now some small panic attack." I added dismissively, though I was sure that later that night, I wouldn't feel exactly the same. "Of course I don't talk about them with anyone, but I trust Bifur and Bofur. Actually I trust all the dwarves of this company." I said, shocked at the thought that Balin might not agree with me on that.

"Nightmares? What are you talking about?" Balin seemed completely lost for a second, and I felt much the same.

"What are you talking about?" I repeated his own question, frowning and wondering where our mind could have possibly taken different paths.

Balin looked away for a moment and seemed even more uncomfortable. I was at a loss. I had no idea what could make him quite so uneasy.

"Amelia, I was talking about … erm…" He cleared his throat, his unease was once more obvious. "Amelia, I was talking about the events that occurred before you had nightmares and a panic attack."

Suddenly my mind was filled with a very detailed picture of a fountain where naked dwarves were bathing. I couldn't help it. I had absolutely no control over it. I blushed terribly. My brain kept providing me with details of this specific picture and I had troubles focusing once more on Balin.

"Oh."

That was all I could pronounce at the moment. Seeing that I had quite obviously guessed what topic he wanted to talk about, and as I clearly couldn't speak at the moment, Balin cleared his throat and continued.

"As I said, you're probably old enough, on a human standard, to learn about this."

My mind was trying hard to keep on with the discussion. My embarrassment was reaching new heights. I had no idea what I could do or say to make Balin speak faster. To top it all, he clearly didn't really enjoy this discussion either.

"As you surely know, men and women are different." He said with pink slightly dusting his cheeks. "What you probably saw yesterday might have shocked you, but it was entirely normal and natural."

My eyes were going to pop out of their sockets soon enough, I was certain of that. I knew my face was probably the darkest shade of red that was possible to have on one's face. It was surreal. Suddenly I wondered whether or not I was truly awake.

Balin cleared his throat again, but kept going.

"As you are becoming older, and you are a woman, you might feel…"

Oh dear Mahal, this couldn't be happening. This couldn't be happening! Please, Balin couldn't be actually trying to give me The Talk.

"…that the way you see men change. And your body will react accordingly." Balin paused slightly and I thought I was having a stroke. "Now Amelia, as you are travelling with men, it is important that you understand that men can sometimes…"

Make him stop!

Please…

Anyone?

"Balin…" I finally managed to blurt out, effectively cutting him mid-sentence. "There's really no need for you to tell me anything."

"Amelia." He tried, obviously as embarrassed as I was.

"No, I mean it. There is no need. I learned everything there was to know about…those stuffs…years ago." A memory of my aunt sitting in front of me in the dimly lit kitchen crossed my mind.

That had been an odd talk with her too. At least I had expected it. She had been shocked, I could remember, when I had come back from school and told them at dinner about what our biology lessons had taught us that day. My aunt was an old fashioned woman. She had very strict ideas of what was proper and what was not. Talking about sexuality with kids, well, young teenagers, wasn't proper. So she had talked with me about lots of things that evening. From sexuality to morality, various topics had been discussed. It had been awkward. I could remember. For a second I had the utter certainty that my aunt and her old fashioned ideas would have really loved to meet Balin and Dori. Probably all the dwarves actually.

Balin gasped and caught my attention again.

"Years ago? But… but you're barely a child!" He seemed shocked once more and I resisted the urge to roll my eyes.

"Balin, in the world where I come from, kids hear about such things quite early." I softly explained without looking at him. "And please, remember that I'm a healer. It wasn't the first time I saw naked men." Though it was the first time I saw naked men fooling around in a fountain.

Balin coughed and mumbled some random words I couldn't quite hear. Then he sighed loudly and rubbed his hand over his eyes.

"Well, at least we won't have to talk about that anymore."

I couldn't help but let out a nervous chuckle at his words.

"I hope not." I squeaked, still deeply embarrassed.

His small, kind smile told me he felt the same way about it. Poor Balin. It wasn't hard to guess that such a discussion wasn't exactly easy for him either. I wondered briefly if it had been expected of him to talk about those things with me, as my guardian. But then, why hadn't Dori done it? I wouldn't have enjoyed it either, but it felt odd that Balin was here without Dori. I couldn't help but ask right then.

"Why were you planning on talking to me about this?"

He sighed loudly and scratched the back of his head before looking at the scenery.

"Normally, a woman should have talked with you. It is barely proper at all that I'm the one speaking about those things. But well, things are what they are."

"No, I meant to say, why is it only you? Why not Dori? Or the both of you." I clarified, I really didn't want any more misunderstandings to happen.

"I drew the short straw." He replied drily.

"You drew…"

I couldn't believe it. At this very moment I hesitated between laughing or face palming myself. These dwarves truly never ceased to amaze me. They truly were something else. Already the fact that they thought it would be needed to discuss this topic was flabbergasting. But that they would actually go to the extent of drawing straws…

Well, it was done now. Somehow I could understand why they had felt the need to talk about the events. After all, in their world, I could easily guess that young children and ladies didn't have lessons about sexuality. I wondered briefly if they could truly have thought of me as completely ignorant on the matter. Even without the lessons back at school, the simple fact that I was a healer should have be enough for them to know I wouldn't need a talk.

I sighed softly and let my gaze travel along the horizon line. These dwarves… at least I was never bored with them.

"Are you sure you want to join us my dear?"

Balin's calm voice made me turn away from the scenery to face him. I was ready to react with anger but when I met his eyes, all the fight left me. Balin wasn't saying this to anger me. He was calm, but clearly worried. His question wasn't meant to offend me, I could tell he genuinely wanted to talk about it.

It made me smile.

Balin was truly different from many hot headed dwarves I knew. He took the time to ponder and think. It was a rare quality among them, I knew that already.

Crossing my arms above my chest I thought about my answer before I spoke.

"I would rather we all went back to Thorin's Halls." I said honestly, looking at him. "But I understand the importance of this mission."

He smiled softly and sat on a bench, coincidentally it was the one where Nori had slept. He gestured for me to sit next to him and I did without hesitation.

"This is not a simple mission." He started to tell me. "No matter what signs Oin and Gloin believe in, or no matter what Thorin hopes to find, the truth is we don't know what lies ahead."

I nodded. Balin was talking to me with respect and as an equal. He deserved all my attention at this instant, so I gave it to him gladly.

"I know that the road is dangerous." I smiled sadly. "And I know I'm probably too weak to be considered an asset. But I can't just wait around to see whether you would all come back or not."

He nodded gravely at that. His bushy white eyebrows were frowning deeply.

"As one of your guardians, it is my responsibility to take care of you. Amelia, I understand the pain of waiting for news, but I believe it might be better for you to wait instead of coming. It would be safer for you. We could very well die, the whole lot of us." He shook his head, sadness evident in his tone. "I do not wish to lead you to your death."

"But Balin, think about it from my perspective." I softly replied, respectful of his feelings. "I have no one else. Sure there is Dís, Danà and Gimli. Sure the other dwarves wouldn't probably kick me out and I'm quite sure that I would be able to survive without you all but…"

I frowned and averted my gaze, looking around instead of Balin. The other dwarves had left the balcony and the two of us were alone. They had probably left more or less at the same time as Balin had started his 'Talk'. I hadn't even realized it, but it didn't really matter; I would have talked even if they had been there. Taking a deep breath I continued.

"But Dori, Nori and Ori are my family." Even if they didn't have the same place in my mind or heart... "Oin is my mentor. He's my kin now even, along with Gloin. You are my guardian, you're the one I know I can go to if I just need to talk. Bifur and Dwalin trained me, I respect them and love them for their patience. Bombur and Bofur are my friends, just like Fili and Kili. And Thorin…I don't know him but I respect him and I owe him so much. If you were to die, the whole lot as you said, well, what am I left with? You are all I knew here. I am closer to some of you than to anyone else."

I looked back up at him. My cheeks were slightly tinged as I wasn't comfortable saying such things aloud, though every word had been honest.

"I have to be with you all. I know I could die. I know we all could. But let's put it that way, I couldn't stand being alive without you all. I… Balin, I …"

A large lump in my throat forced me to stop as tears burnt my eyes. It all sounded so stupid, so cheesy. I hated it. But still, I had been entirely honest. I couldn't do anything without them. I was certain I would live and survive just fine, I would still have Danà and Dís after all. But I wasn't sure I would deal well with so much grief. I realized now that almost all my life here had been built around them. Not knowing whether they were alive and well would turn me insane. Knowing they were all dead would cripple me with a terrible grief.

I just wouldn't be alive without them, so if they all wanted to go on a mad quest, then I would follow them. I felt Balin kindly pat my shoulder before he just hugged me. It took me some minutes to calm down.

"Alright Amelia. Alright. We're going to go and join the others for lunch, but after that you are going with Bifur and Dwalin to train, intensively. And you'll do so until our departure from this place, is that understood?"

I smiled and pecked his cheek.

"Yes Balin."

"Come here my dear."

As we stood Balin turned to face me and we let our foreheads lightly bumps against one another. We stayed silent for several seconds. When we separated and started to walk out of the balcony, I knew that Balin at least understood my reasons for following them and agreed with it.

I felt relieved to just know that much. It was important to me that at least some of them would welcome me in their ranks.

As we slowly made our way through the corridors I looked at my older guardian from the corner of my eye. If anyone could and would answer some of my questions, it'd be him.

"Balin?" I asked to catch his attention, once he glanced at me I continued. "Why are you all so different here? Why don't you like the elves?"

He sighed loudly and furrowed his brow.

"It's not really a matter of like or dislike Amelia." He replied, shaking his head lightly. "Elves and dwarves have a long history, and recently especially what happened between our two races has left a lot of distrust in us."

"Have you been at war against them?" I asked, genuinely curious to learn more about the dwarves' history.

"Not recently, no. But when Erebor was attacked, Thranduil and his armies didn't help the dwarves. Thorin can't forget it. None of us really can."

I wished there was time for him to explain me things in detail. Clearly there were many more details to say about that, but I felt that I should leave it for a later moment. Tilting my head a bit in thought I couldn't help but ask him some more questions though.

"This elf, Thran…Thranduil, right?" He nodded to let me know I had caught the name properly. "Is he here? Was he the leader of the elves before Lord Elrond?"

"No, he lives in Mirkwood, a forest we'll have to cross to get to Erebor. He is the leader of the elves who live there." Balin patiently explained.

"But…" I immediately reacted. "But then the elves from here have nothing to do with it?"

That seemed to make Balin slightly pause. He stopped in his tracks and turned to face me. I imitated him, focusing all my attention on this discussion. I felt instinctively that there was something quite important about all this, though I wasn't entirely sure what it was or whether it would be useful in the near future.

"Amelia, the elves are different than us. They have lived for themselves for quite awhile now. The last alliances have been all but forgotten. Thranduil could have helped. Even if he refused to fight Smaug, he still could have given shelter to the wounded and homeless. They didn't, they went back in their forest, turning their back on us. For decades the dwarves of Erebor have wandered the world, men were looking down on us and chasing us away once they didn't need our services anymore. You can't fault us for being angry still, for being resentful."

I didn't answer at first.

I did agree with him on those points. I still remembered how I had reacted when I had first heard the tale of the dwarves' wanderings. I still felt the same way about it and simply couldn't understand why people would abandon them like this. Why would anyone do this? It was revolting.

"I understand Balin. I do." But something kept bothering me, even though I couldn't quite pinpoint what it was. "But do you really think that antagonizing the elves now is the right thing to do? I mean, they haven't helped in the past, but they helped us this time. It doesn't erase the wrong things they did, but shouldn't we at least be grateful for their help?"

Balin smiled kindly at me then and placed one of his hands on my shoulder.

"You are right my dear. But remember who we are." The last he said with a twinkle in his eyes.

Who they were? Oh, right. Dwarves…

Chuckling a bit I shook my head.

"Right, I apologize. You are all too proud and stubborn for your own good." It might sound odd, but it explained so much that it actually made perfect sense if you knew how dwarves could be.

"That we are… that we are." Balin replied softly with a small smile.

"I guess we're already lucky that the King agreed to stay here for awhile."

Balin laughed at that before we started to walk again. The discussion was over, but this odd feeling wouldn't let me go. There was something about the elves…maybe they wouldn't be allies, but I felt that they shouldn't be treated as enemies. Maybe my opinion was influenced by my own history with them, they had healed me after all, but still. I wouldn't be rude to them. Balin's voice tore me out of my thoughts just as we were about to open wooden doors to enter yet another balcony.

"You know my dear, if you are to come with us, maybe you should start to call Thorin by his name, even when you simply talk of him. He's our king, but don't remind him too much." With a wink Balin opened the door and we were greeted by loud cheers and the smell of food.

A quick glance at the table told me that the elves still hadn't prepared meat, but there was enough bread, cakes, potatoes and wine to appease the dwarves.

Almost instantly I registered the fact that, contrarily to the previous day, the dwarves were left alone to eat this time. There were no musicians or elves around. And as I had correctly guessed, their terrible behaviour had only been for the elves. Right now, my friends were back to normal. Chatting loudly, eating joyously and not anywhere near what elves would consider proper, but there clearly would be no food fight involved today.

Balin patted my back before he went to sit at the King's, well Thorin's right. I looked around and smiled at Ori who gestured for me to sit beside him. On my other side was Bombur who was eating everything he could grab and that included vegetables. I kept my promise to Nori and tried to behave normally, but it was odd to think about what I should do or not when in the same room as him. Luckily I didn't have to ask myself too many questions because he was on the other far side of the table.

As I sat, I realized that the man, the hobbit, was sitting just in front of me. I would be dishonest if I didn't admit I was really curious about him. It wouldn't be proper to just ask whether I could have a look at his feet, so I restrained myself. Instead I smiled at him and decided to start a neutral conversation with him.

"Hi, I'm Amelia. You trained with the others this morning?"

He looked puzzled for a moment and seemed to hesitate. A few dwarves around us, Dwalin and Gloin mostly, snickered at my words and the poor man glared at them before lowering his gaze to his plate and eating some more.

I blinked several times, my mouth opened but no sounds came out. Frowning I wondered whether I had said something I shouldn't have. It was Ori, sweet Ori, who gave me an answer.

"Mr Baggins doesn't really fight Amee."

"He's more interested in books and doilies then weapons." Bofur added from his place, winking at me before laughing and gulping down at least half a tankard of beer.

"Doilies?" I looked at the man who seemed to have shrunk in his seat in the past five minutes and I suddenly felt bad for him.

Clearly he had been given a hard time. Glancing around, I could see my friends and family around the long table. Most of them were warriors. Maybe not trained ones, but I knew now how hard life could be for the dwarves. All of them knew how to fight. Even Bofur, who loved to make toys but had to make plates to earn a living, was deadly with his hammer. I was quite sure that even Bombur and Ori had, to some extent, been trained too. Well, even though Ori's training had probably been cut short by Dori's mother hen's nature.

"Well, it's never too late to learn Mr…Baggins, right? I'm sure one of this lot" I made a circling gesture to include all the dwarves "will not mind training you while we wait."

Hearing my words the small man choked on the food he was trying to swallow. At first some of the dwarves laughed as his face gradually became red. After a few seconds though, as the others were still laughing, both me and Oin realized that something not so funny might actually be happening.

The hobbit had brought his hands around his throat and his mouth was wide open. He clearly was trying hard to dislodge something that was stuck in his throat and hindering his breathing.

I jumped to my feet at the same time as Oin, but he managed to get to our smaller member faster as he was sitting closer. My brain was already wondering whether Oin would know what to do. I shouldn't have worried though. Clearly dwarves loved to eat, drink, talk and laugh at the same time, so this probably wasn't the first time that Oin had to deal with such a situation. He first hit him in the back. As it didn't help Mr Baggins to cough out whatever piece of food was choking him, Oin calmly stepped behind me and in one swift move performed what I knew as the Heimlich manoeuvre.

Our hobbit could finally breathe again.

I stepped closer and placed a hand on his shoulder. His breathing was laboured, heavy and I could hear a slight whizzing sound. Under my fingers I could feel him shuddering as he bent in two and placed his own hands on his knees. After having coughed a few more times he finally took a deep breath and seemed to calm down significantly.

"Are you alright?" I asked softly, genuinely concerned.

"Fi, fine…" He coughed twice loudly. "I'm fine."

"This chunk of apple almost killed you." Oin said matter-of-factly.

"I always said that vegetables were bad for your health." Bofur joyously joked.

Just like that the dwarves went back to their lunch, joking with each other and not caring in the least about the smaller man. The hobbit glanced at me before he left the room. I stood for a short while, looking at the closed doors, until Ori called for me to come back at the table.

I didn't comment but I thought it was rather cold from the dwarves to behave like this. Still, instead of saying anything about it, I chose to wait and observe what would happen in the next few days.

But during that day, there wasn't much to observe. After lunch I stayed with Ori and ended up being hauled to the training grounds by Dwalin a couple of hours later. I wasn't surprised when I didn't see Mr Baggins there and soon, my thoughts were completely focused on my training and the little man was pushed to the back of my mind.

Later that night everyone decided to cook some meat once again. I knew it would be pointless to tell my friends that destroying the elves' property to make firewood wasn't really polite, so I just sighed and said nothing. As they prepared everything I sat on a bench at the far side of the balcony. Leaning back, I let my head rest against the stone guardrail and looked at the sky.

"How do you feel?"

I smiled softly. I didn't need to look to know that Nori just sat next to me. He lighted his pipe and started to smoke.

"I'm fine, why?" I sat back straight, glancing at him.

"You did well today during your training. Bifur said so." He said naturally without looking at me.

My smile turned into a grimace as I instinctively brought my left hand to my right shoulder. I had spent the whole afternoon sparing with Dwalin and Bifur. It had gone as well as expected and I had received a rather harsh blow on my shoulder, as well as several others on my arms and legs.

I glanced at Nori and found his eyes. We looked into each other gaze for awhile, until Nori looked away. It reminded me that the other were all awake and nearby and I sighed. This promise I had made might be more difficult to keep than I had previously thought. I wanted nothing more than to sit closer to him and lean against him. But I wouldn't have done that before so I shouldn't do it now.

Trying to distract my own brain I asked the first question that came through my mind.

"Why is Mr Baggins so distant? He doesn't talk much and is never with us."

Nori puffed out a ring of smoke and hummed slightly before answering.

"That Baggins lad isn't like us."

"So what? He's still a member of this group and part of this quest." I retorted.

It didn't make sense that the dwarves would just reject him because he was different. They had accepted me…well, it was true that I was a woman, but still. I didn't want to think so poorly of my friends and family. If the hobbit had joined their company, then surely they respected it.

"I wonder…"

Nori's murmured words forced me to look back up at him.

"What do you mean?"

Again, the thief took his time to answer. I couldn't help but smile though. It didn't annoy me in the least, it was just like him to take his time to reveal his thoughts. He wasn't looking at me, instead he leant back and let his head fall backwards so that he could stare at the night sky. His pipe was in his hand.

"He didn't want to come. He doesn't want to go with us."

"Maybe…but he's here. Isn't that enough?"

Nori sat back normally and looked at me. His grey eyes seemed darker now that the light was fading. He placed his pipe back in his mouth before he groaned.

For awhile we remained silent. It was comfortable, just being near him, even though we couldn't touch. I had somehow shifted a bit closer to him, earning a cautious glance from him as I did so. I shrugged it off, nothing I did was suspicious in my mind.

It was honestly annoying to have to think about my actions on that level. I didn't really like having to hide my happiness or my feelings. I hated it actually. But if I had to choose between hiding it or not being allowed to be with Nori at all, then well, the choice was easy to make of course. So here I was, second guessing everything I did, analyzing my own actions to try and find out whether they would look suspicious or too intimate to the others. And then of course came the third part of this whole madness when I was actually wondering whether I was actually being less intimate with him compared to how we had been before.

It was giving me headaches already and it had barely been a day.

As I got lost in those thoughts I stopped paying attention to the dwarves.

Rather suddenly, a smell hit my nostrils and stopped my trail of thoughts.

Roast meat. It smelt like roasted meat. My eyes widened immediately but instead of seeing the dwarves happily cooking some sausages, I saw the man being roasted on a branch by the trolls.

My stomach churned and I felt bile rise up my throat.

Instinctively I took a deep breath to try and calm the nausea. I could only curse myself as the smell assaulted me again. Immediately, I jumped to my feet and pressed my right hand to my mouth.

I had to get away from that smell. Now! Blindly I ran away to the door and into the corridor. Concentrating on trying to breath normally I didn't pay any attention to the yells of protest when I accidentally knocked a plate on my way out, or any of the calls that followed my sudden departure. The smell of the meat was forcing me to go through the scene all over again. That poor man's fate was forever burnt in my memories and I just couldn't make peace with it, not just yet.

Running to my room I barely knelt in front of a chamber pot in time to empty my stomach in it instead of on the floor. I coughed and realized that tears were wetting my face as I started to shake. That poor, poor man…his fate could have been mine. I felt hands gathering my hair away from my face as I started to retch again.

I couldn't tell how long it took for me to calm down and my stomach to settle, by the time I stopped being sick I had been dry heaving for awhile. I felt weak, dirty, and simply pathetic. I heard voices around me and tried to concentrate on them.

I wished I hadn't…because that was a discussion I really had never thought I would ever hear. I didn't know whether I should be amused by it or…something else.

"What's going on? What happened to her?" I identified Dori's voice easily.

"I don't know, we were just sitting and suddenly she jumped up and ran away." Nori explained from behind me and I guessed he might be the one holding my hair.

"Maybe it's something she ate?" I felt Ori take my hands as he spoke and realized I was cold and shaking. "Maybe we should try to make her eat a bit of meat; she only had vegetables since we found her."

"She got sick when you guys started to cook meat, I'm not sure she'll want to eat anything right now." Nori retorted calmly though I clearly heard the worry in his voice.

"It reminds me of the time when Danà got sick every time she smelt food." Apparently Gloin was here too.

"What had happened to her?" Dori enquired immediately.

"She was pregnant."

There was a pause and I realized that my eyes were closed as I sagged against either Ori or Nori, I couldn't really tell. It took some time for me to register what Gloin had just said and before I even could try to gather some strength to tell them all that it had nothing to do with me being pregnant, voices started to yell and shout.

"I won't have a pregnant woman following our company on this quest!" The King, well I had to call him Thorin now, bellowed and I was honestly surprised to find out he was here.

"Pregnant? How could she be pregnant?"

"Really lad? You want me to draw a picture?" Bofur's cheeky voice covered Fili's laugh after Kili's exclamation.

"How could she indeed…" Dori's voice was suddenly filled with anger and I felt the hands that were holding my hair tighten slightly.

"You wouldn't…" I heard Nori start to say before he was interrupted by a louder voice.

"Can't you all stop this nonsense for a minute! Move away, let me through!"

Just a few seconds after I had heard his voice, I felt Oin's finger on my face.

"Amelia, open your eyes. Look at me."

It took all I had for me to actually obey such a simple command. I met his gaze as soon as my eyes were open. Meanwhile he had placed his hand on my forehead, probably to check my temperature and had taken my wrist in his hand.

"No fever, she's cold." He commented before barking to no one in particular. "Grab a blanket for her."

He kept on mumbling while the other dwarves were tense yet silent.

"What happened Amelia?"

His question brought tears in my eyes and my heart beat started to go up, which he felt as his fingers were still pressed against my pulse. Images of the event replayed once again in my mind but I didn't have enough strength to heave anymore so I just started to shake violently.

At this moment I heard someone speak aloud, it had to be Bifur because I hadn't understood the word.

"Attack? What attack? The elves did this?" Dwalin growled and, hadn't it been for Bofur the dwarves would probably have rushed outside.

"Damn it, that's what it is!" Bofur exclaimed and I heard a slap, he had probably hit his own forehead. "I should have guessed. But I don't understand…" A second after he said those words, Bofur appeared in my sight and pushed Oin a bit. "Amelia, you weren't alone. What brought this on?"

My lips trembled as I tried to speak. My throat was hurting, burning, and I struggled to get one word out. The room was completely silent when I whispered just one word. Bofur's brows furrowed.

"What did she say?" Dori asked.

"I think she just said 'smell'." Ori answered. "But I'm not sure."

"Nah, can't be right." Bofur's frown deepened. "It didn't smell anything like…"

Bifur interrupted him and I heard him speak fast. When he stopped, everyone was silent for a short while and when I concentrated to look at Bofur, I found him slightly paler than before. I couldn't be too sure though.

"Erm…Amelia did you, well, the trolls. Did they, or, erm, was there…"

A tear rolled on my cheek and I mouthed two words that came out as a broken whisper.

"Man…roast…"

The silence felt rather tense around me after I just pronounced these two words. It was rather obvious now that Bofur paled. He wasn't the only one and I could feel Ori's hands shake a bit in mine. Everybody stood frozen for awhile before they finally started to react to this news.

Their reactions shocked me too, because it wasn't at all what I had expected. I had thought they would laugh at me, think about me as a useless, weak person. Once again my thoughts and fears painted them in a crueller way than they actually were. I should be ashamed in my lack of faith in them. Thorin was the first one to clear his throat and speak aloud, easily shattering my expectations.

"Bombur, Fili, Kili, go clear it all. The smell should disappear quickly enough if you remove the meat from the fire and throw it away."

I didn't hear any grunt or complain and I could tell that the three named dwarves were about to leave when I quickly reacted.

"No." I croaked tiredly.

I could feel all their eyes on me but I was too tired to care. I sighed and sat a bit straighter before I gathered my thoughts.

"It's fine. I'll be fine." My throat was sore and it pained me a bit to talk but I continued. "I have to get used to it."

"Amelia I'm not sure this is a good idea." Dori retorted immediately.

"Aye lass, it won't do you any good." Bofur agreed sadly.

"Stop it both of you." Gloin then grunted. "If Amelia says she wants to try, then respect it. She's stronger than that."

I didn't know what shocked me most at this moment. Was it Gloin's confident words or Dwalin's and Bifur's grunts of agreement? Were these three warriors really trusting me, praising me? Was it really possible that they respected me that much?

Tears prickled at the corners of my eyes as I looked up at Gloin. The ginger dwarf huffed and looked away, frowning lightly, and I couldn't help but smile a bit at the sight. His bushy beard couldn't hide completely his small pout and the growing darkness couldn't dissimulate the pink that dusted his cheeks.

I glanced around and saw Thorin nod sharply before he started to walk away.

"Alright. Bombur, let's feast tonight."

The kind dwarf nodded happily and smiled at me before he exited the room, soon followed by most of the others. Only the three brothers, Bofur and Balin remained behind. Dori and Bofur exchanged a glance before Dori spoke.

"We know you're strong Amelia. You don't have to prove anything. You don't have to hurt yourself to prove anything to us."

Bofur nodded but the others remained silent.

As I felt my strengths slowly coming back to me, I shook my head.

"It's not that Dori." I grimaced as my voice cracked because of the soreness of my throat.

Before I could say anything, Ori jumped to his feet and found on the bedside table an empty glass and a jug of water. In an instant he brought me back the glass filled with cool water. It soothed the fire that burnt my throat, and even though it still hurt a bit, I was able to speak more clearly. The dwarves had patiently waited for me to speak, which was surprising.

"I don't want to prove anything." I said tiredly. "I just can't let it happen continuously. Otherwise what would happen? Would you all stop eating meat as soon as I'm nearby? It wouldn't make sense." I shook my head and smirked a bit as Ori's eyes widened in obvious fear. "I'll just have to forget it Dori. It'll be better. With time, it'll be better." The slight shaking of my voice proved how unsure I was of my own words.

To my utter surprise, Balin was the next one to speak and I wouldn't have expected him to say the words that came next.

"It'll get better Amelia." He said with sadness. "For some time, you won't be able to avoid the memories, but with time, it'll get better."

I looked up at him and blurted out.

"How do you..." I stopped as a thought crossed my mind.

The dragon. Erebor. Dís' words came back to me too. She had said once to her brother, in front of all these dwarves, that even her grandfather's men had been helpless, burnt and killed by the dragon. Balin was old. He had lived through the attack and clearly he had suffered.

He probably guessed from the look on my face that I had connected the dots because he didn't answer my aborted question. He only nodded slightly.

"It will get better." He only repeated with conviction and I could only trust his words. "Now let's go. You should try to eat something."

I swallowed thickly as Nori helped me stand. I glanced at him. His gaze was intense, there was no other words to describe it. For a short second, my breath was caught in my throat. It was only as I felt him squeeze my arm a bit that I managed to look away. We were all silent and slightly grim as we entered the balcony. As soon as I stepped in, my anxiety rose, but I didn't have the time to let my brain recall terrible memories as Thorin called me.

"Girl. Come here." His voice was his usual grumpy and slightly snappish tone.

I immediately obeyed. I didn't even think about not doing so. It could have been worrisome, but now truly wasn't the time to question my obedience. As I came closer he gestured for me to sit on the bench next to him.

"The wind will carry the smell the other way." He simply grunted before his icy eyes settled on me. "I have to know. Is it the smell only, or is it the fire too?"

This time I didn't need any time to remember that he too had survived through the attack on Erebor. He too had suffered greatly, more than some probably.

I sniffed the air tentatively, afraid of what smells would reach my nose. When I couldn't identify anything, I inhaled deeply and was completely reassured when the smell of cooked meat didn't reach me.

"The smell. I..." Strangely, at this instant, I felt as if I could talk with him.

I frowned as I realized that I felt actually more comfortable talking to him about it than I had been with the others. He probably was the dwarf I knew the least. He was the King. The ever serious and grumpy King, who scared me sometimes and puzzled me often. Still, maybe because we weren't that close, or maybe because I knew he might understand, I felt like I could tell him what had happened.

"When I was on my own," I started softly, almost whispering. "I saw firelight one night. I thought that maybe it'll be you so I came closer." I could tell that he was listening intently to my words and it gave me some courage. "As you know it was the trolls. They were," I breathed in deeply. "they were cooking, well, roasting, a man." I swallowed the bile that had risen in my throat and closed my eyes. "The smell. Thorin it smelt like a normal roast." Those last words had been whispered so low that I wasn't sure he heard them.

I saw him nod as his eyes took a faraway look. His face suddenly reflected sadness and pain, a deep pain that had never healed. I felt my heart clench rather suddenly. I had heard stories here and there, and I could remember Dís' expression whenever she would remember their past. Clearly, whatever pain I could suffer from was nothing compared to theirs.

"You won't forget. But you'll learn to live with the memories." He simply said in a whisper.

I looked at him then and our gazes locked for a minute. For maybe the first time since we had met I felt that we truly understood each other more. It was disturbing that our understanding came from such terrible events, but it was comforting somehow to know he wouldn't cast me away because of these events. It was odd that I realized only then how much he had suffered in his life. There was no use saying the contrary, my own pain was nothing in comparison to his. I didn't feel ashamed, just maybe a bit humbled by his strength, by him. I didn't know what he saw in my eyes, but after a short while he nodded and looked away.

A few minutes later, minutes we had both spent in silence, Fili approached us with two plates. He handed one to his uncle and glanced at me worriedly before asking in a kind voice.

"Amelia, do you feel like eating something?"

I swallowed before I nodded hesitantly. I took the plate that he handed me then and looked at the sausages on it. The smell hit me once more and flashes appeared in front of my eyes. The trolls. The man. His distorted face stuck into a silent scream. I closed my eyes tightly and swallowed back the bile. Clearing my throat I took the fork and angrily stabbed a sausage before biting it quickly.

I chewed and swallowed the meat as fast as I could and then waited for a second to see if my upset stomach would keep it. I was anxious, it was obvious, but steeling my mind I decided that I would eat that stupid meat. It was only then that I realized that both Thorin and Fili had been observing me. As soon as I saw it though, they looked away. I still caught with the corner of my eye the approving nod from Thorin while Fili smiled kindly at me.

I smiled back but sighed a bit.

I didn't like this situation.

This was a weakness I would have liked to do without. I looked forlornly at the meat in my plate. Glancing back up my eyes met the grey ones that always seemed to easily find me. I could read so many different things in his gaze. It was so obvious that Nori was worried. For him, and probably because his brothers were just as worried, I forced myself to eat. At first every bite brought back memories of the man roasting on the branch. But after several very long minutes were I thought I would most certainly throw up again, I startled when I heard someone complain loudly.

I looked up to see Bofur glare at Nori who just acted as if nothing had happened.

As our gazes met once again, Nori winked at me and after evading Bofur's fork that was sent his way, he lazily strolled towards another bench. Everyone laughed as Bofur grumbled about how it wasn't right to steal sausages from a friend. I chuckled lightly and, feeling slightly better, I started to think about Nori. As I kept replaying the moments we had shared in the past day and a half, I managed to eat rather quickly. I swallowed the lump in my throat when I realized I had eaten everything without thinking about the man, stupidly thinking about him at that precise moment.

Thankfully, Bofur chose that moment to throw his last sausage at Bombur who was sitting on some wooden bench or table, I couldn't quite see. Whatever this furniture had been, it hadn't been strong enough. I couldn't help but laugh heartily with the others as Bombur crashed on the floor. Even Thorin smirked at that moment.

We were still laughing a while later when I decided to stand and stir a bit.

As I walked through the balcony, I found out only then that the little man was nowhere to be seen. I immediately frowned and double checked. I couldn't see him on the balcony. I worried instantly. Was he like me, losing his way easily? Then maybe he was lost somewhere in the gardens. I grabbed the closest dwarf to me, who happened to be Kili.

"What is it Meli?" He asked with a toothy smile.

"Kili, have you seen the little man? You know...what's his name?" I tried to recall the name, but my mind had been busy with many other thoughts that day.

"Mister Baggins you mean?" Kili calmed down a bit and looked around too. "I don't see him here."

"I know." I barely managed not to roll my eyes at him. "Do you think he might be lost?"

"Erm." He tilted his head and seemed to think. "I'm not sure. What do you want with him?"

I frowned at that. This wasn't right.

"He's a member of this group. If no one knows where he is, of course we should be worried."

Kili became slightly sheepish and scratched the back of his head. His behaviour made me frown some more.

"Seriously?" I couldn't help but blurt out, completely bewildered. "Does anyone care about him at all?"

Kili was now really uncomfortable and it was obvious. To be honest I didn't really care. I was shocked to find out that the youngest one here, the one I thought would be the easiest to get along with, wouldn't even try to get along with that mister Baggins. I had honestly thoughts that Kili and Fili would be the most open minded dwarves here. Clearly I was wrong somewhere.

"Well, you know Meli, it's not that simple." Kili tried to explain. "He's not really like us."

"I'm not like you either. Still, I don't remember being shunned by you all." I retorted sharply.

He pulled a face right then and shifted awkwardly on his feet, glancing around nervously.

"It's not the same. You were defenceless." He argued.

"Fili said he was too." I cut in, crossing my arms over my chest.

"You are a woman!" He desperately tried, taking a step back.

My eyes widened before I glared at him.

"I beg your pardon." I said through gritted teeth, glaring at him.

He startled slightly and looked around.

"Mahal, can't someone help me here?" He finally said before retreating slightly, stepping away from me some more.

"What's going on?" Nori appeared at our side seemingly out of nowhere, startling Kili.

"Nori!" He exclaimed and I couldn't help but quirk an eyebrow at that. "Can you tell her that we're not shunning mister Baggins?" The young dwarf looked pitiful as he asked Nori to take his side.

My favourite thief seemed honestly surprised, and then he glanced at me and sighed before rubbing his forehead with his left hand. He hummed lightly and seemed to think a bit before he talked.

"Amelia, I told you already, we're not being mean. The hobbit is just different."

It was Nori now facing me and somehow it didn't feel right to glare at him over such a topic. My stance changed dramatically compared to what it had been when I faced Kili. I uncrossed my arms, placing my hands on my hips, and just tilted my head.

"But look Nori," I said. "He's not around and no one cares enough to ask where he might be." I gestured at the balcony and could see Nori's gaze quickly sweep over the people who were there.

"Maybe, or maybe you could say that he didn't care enough to stay and share a meal with us."

I opened my mouth to retort, but I closed it back without saying a word. Alright. Maybe Nori was right. Maybe he wasn't. The only thing I knew for sure now, was that I didn't have enough information to make an honest opinion. I nodded and heard Kili loudly sigh. The poor dwarf seemed really relieved right then. I couldn't help but smile when a thought struck my mind and gave me a sudden idea. My smile turned into a smirk as I looked at Nori.

"Still. We should find out whether he's alright. Maybe he is, but what if he got lost?" I shook my head, hoping I wasn't overdoing it. "I'll try and find him."

I saw in Nori's twinkling eyes that he immediately caught on my idea. His face remained rather emotionless though as he spoke.

"Right, because you're obviously the right person to send looking for him. Should I remind you of what happened last time you walked around without a map?"

I had to bite the inside of my cheeks in order not to smile too much right then.

"I will not leave him alone outside. Not without knowing that he's alright." I retorted.

Nori sighed loudly while Kili watched each of us alternatively. The young dwarf seemed rather lost. But well, for my idea to work without anyone becoming suspicious, I needed a witness and Kili would be perfect for the role. I knew he wouldn't question what he was seeing.

"Alright, alright." Nori shook his head, as if he was giving up. "Let's go. If I don't go along you'll get lost. At least like this we'll have a better chance to find the hobbit, and no one will have to look for you either."

I huffed, as if I had been offended, and crossed my arms over my chest once again.

"Alright." I forced myself to sound annoyed. "Let's go."

Nori rolled his eyes and gestured for me to go first. Kili for his part seemed rather pleased to have been forgotten and from the corner of my eyes I saw him quickly retreat towards his brother. Then Nori closed the doors behind him. Suddenly the others were completely forgotten as I smiled at him and took his hand.

Even though we were still too close to the others for it to be safe, I quickly embraced him. My arms wound around his neck while he tightly embraced my waist. Without missing a heartbeat I closed the gap between us and softly caressed his lips with mine, not really kissing him, but teasing him nonetheless. He didn't care much for that as his hand tangled in my hair and brought me closer. I smiled against his lips before I kissed him back.

Much too quickly though, he leant back.

"We should go." He whispered against my lips.

"Aye." I breathed out before I kissed him again.

My right hand went up to the back of his head as I pressed my body against his. He reacted immediately, one of his hands still in my hair while the other one was trailing over my spine, sending electricity along it. I had my eyes closed and savoured each touch. We broke apart breathing heavily but my eyes remained closed.

"We should," I murmured before kissing him lightly. "really go."

"Aye." He said before kissing me again.

Honestly I wondered which one of us was the worst. Clearly neither of us had any interest in looking for the little man.

A loud noise coming from the balcony was what managed to break us apart. We both startled and stepped away from each other. My heart was beating at a rapid pace, but I honestly wasn't sure what was making it go so fast. Was it our kisses? Was it the fright from the noise? As I pressed my hand against my chest Nori leant closer to the door, clearly trying to listen and find out what was going on.

After several long seconds, he grabbed my hand and guided me away.

"Apparently it was just Bombur who broke another chair."

I smiled, glad that the noise hadn't come from curious dwarves who would have seen Nori and me. Kissing him there probably hadn't been our best idea. I bit my lower lip as I looked at him. I wanted to kiss him some more. I felt stupidly giddy at that moment. It was as if I was walking in some very realistic dream. My thoughts couldn't be further away from the mission or the little man.

Nori glanced at me and quirked an eyebrow. Then a lazy smirk tugged at one corner of his lips and I just couldn't help it anymore. I bounced lightly on my feet and tugged his arm to force him to face me. He didn't resist at all. I could see in the small twinkle in his grey eyes that he really, really didn't mind. My left hand quickly found his cheek and I leant forward, placing a soft kiss on his lips.

This time though, we both managed to behave and kept the kiss very soft and tender.

I smiled at him as I leant back.

"I thought we were looking for the hobbit." Nori teased me.

I didn't even try to answer him. I smiled at him, squeezing his hand a bit. At that moment I felt that I would never be happier than right then. It wasn't possible. My heart felt as if it was about to burst from all the feelings.

We once again started to walk, hand in hand, in a peaceful silence.

"How do you feel?" Nori asked me kindly after some time.

I took a glimpse at him and immediately guessed he was worried. My smile became a bit sad and I lightly bumped my shoulder against his.

"I'll be fine. Don't worry."

He snorted then and I looked at him once again.

"Right." He said derisively.

"What is it?" I frowned.

"That you think I don't worry for you is… laughable." He sighed and squeezed my hand before he looked at me. "Mizimul, I can't help it. Between what happened yesterday, and again today."

"Nori, it'll get better with time." I cut in. "I'm rather messed up right now, but I'll be fine." I wasn't lying, and I really wanted him to trust me on that.

"I wish I could help." He whispered while looking down.

He looked defeated. It revolted me that he would be hurt this way. Instead of reacting with anger though, I felt my heart filled with sadness. I loved him so much, it was a surprise each time I realized it.

"You are." I whispered with as much conviction as I could. "Don't you realize it? You're helping me feel better Nori." I placed a hand on his cheek and felt my heart thump loudly for him. "Don't you know it? It's nothing new. Since I arrived here, it's always been you helping me."

Our voices were so low that I had trouble hearing my own words. Still, it felt oddly appropriate to whisper in this peaceful place. After this small exchange we kept silent for awhile. I could have looked into his eyes forever without ever getting bored. I kept caressing his cheek until he placed his hand on mine. Softly he turned his face and placed a kiss on my palm. It made me feel giddy and light headed.

We had to break apart at some point though. As we walked through the gardens, I realized at some point that I knew where we were. Smiling a bit more widely, I tugged on Nori's arm once again and forced him to follow me. A few minutes later we were in front of the weeping willow I had come to the first time. Not losing a minute, I cautiously pushed the branches away and walked under the tree's foliage. When I turned to look at Nori, he was smiling.

"How do you know of this place?" He asked, letting go of my hand before he embraced me from behind.

I leant back against his chest and let the back of my head rest on his shoulder. I loved the feeling of his strong arms against my middle and I couldn't help but lightly caress his hands.

"Found it the other day, when I was running away from you all."

He squeezed my waist a bit and rested his head against mine. He hummed as I traced small circles on his hands. He shifted a bit and placed a soft kiss on my temple forcing a happy sigh out of me.

I closed my eyes for a second and thought about him. Quickly my thoughts trailed over various topics that were mostly related to either him or us. At some point though I couldn't help but think about the sight of him in the process of going out of the fountain. I could perfectly remember how the water had trailed over his muscled chest as he had started to get out. I remembered how his muscles had rippled under his skin when he pushed on his arms to get out of the basin. I bit my lip as I replayed how I had seen first his chest come out of the water, then his waist and how I had stupidly squeaked and turned away right before I could see anything else. I mentally cursed myself, biting more strongly on my lower lip.

I had probably unknowingly made some sort of noise, because Nori shifted so that he could turn his head and see my face.

"What is it?" He asked me and I shivered when I felt his lips move quite close to my ear.

A huge blush crept on my face as I pondered on whether or not I should stay silent.

"Erm..."

I wasn't sure how to put it.

"Mizimul, what happened?" He insisted and I could hear worry once again in his tone.

I looked away, entirely too embarrassed to face him.

"Mizimul." He squeezed my waist and I sighed.

I really couldn't say no to him. Blushing terribly I cleared my throat before I even tried to utter a word.

"I just thought about the other day." I let out in a rush.

"The other day?" He repeated softly, clearly confused.

"You know, when you guys...and I arrived and saw...well, you know, you..." I stammered pathetically, feeling stupider as every second ticked by.

For a moment I wondered whether Nori understood what I meant. Remembering his previous reactions when I simply slept next to him, I was more or less certain that remembering this event would make him react spectacularly too. If I were perfectly honest, I would admit that the lack of reactions from the dwarves had been more than a little surprising. Except for that evening when Thorin had been embarrassed, and the talk from Balin, none of the other had said a word about it. Considering the fact that the dwarves seemed rather old fashioned concerning such matters, this lack of comments was almost shocking. But I wouldn't lie, I was relieved. Still, I had expected Bofur to make some jokes. His silence was a miracle.

I was brought out of my thoughts when Nori startled and almost jumped away from me. I staggered a bit, not having expected him to step back, and he was kind enough to grab me before I fell.

"Wha..." I blurted out as I fell heavily against his chest.

"Mizimul." His voice was serious and I immediately froze. "Do not ever remind me of that day."

I blinked.

Why was he so angry? It hadn't been my fault that I had seen them. It was actually their fault for bathing in a fountain! Well, now that I thought of that I realized how utterly rude it had been of them to do this. I took a step away, straightening my back, before I looked in Nori's direction.

"Why are you reacting like this? I didn't witness this on purpose!" I defended myself against his anger.

"Mizimul, I am serious. Do not speak of that ever again." He all but growled.

"It wasn't my fault! Do you think I actually wanted to see all of you..." I couldn't finish that thought.

In a second Nori was in front of me, his hand against my mouth. I hadn't even realized he had moved that he was already standing there. I blinked twice before he spoke in a low tone.

"Amelia. Not a word."

I remained frozen for a short bit before I slowly nodded. Of course, I wasn't afraid of Nori. It was impossible for me to be afraid of him. But he was acting weirdly. He lowered his hand and sighed loudly, before he took my hand and intertwined our fingers. Weren't we under the tree, maybe the moonlight would have allowed me to get a good look at his face. Here the darkness hid him from me. Still, a strange thought struck me and I just had to voice it.

"Nori, are you..." I saw him look up in my direction and I held my breath as I asked, a smirk starting to tug on my lips. "Are you jealous?"

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><p><strong>AN: Here is yet another chapter. This fic is starting to become truly long, though I never expected it to reach such length. I hope you liked this chapter. I know that there is significantly less drama or action in this one and the previous one, but I didn't want to simply throw them right into the quest. I wanted to give Amelia and Nori some time, after making them both wait for so long.**

**The quest is really tricky to write for me. This is mainly the reason why you don't have fast updates. **

**I hope you enjoyed this chapter.**

**I honestly want to thank those of you who reviewed :) I know those chapters aren't the most exciting ones, so thanks for showing your support! I hope you're not disappointed by this chapter.**

**On another note, this update was slow as well because I got struck with a bit of inspiration for a companion piece centered on Bifur. You can find the link in my profile. Thanks a lot for those of you who read and reviewed it! :) **

**I'll try and find more inspiration for the next chapters, but well, you've been patient so far so I hope you'll be patient just a bit more while the dwarves are in Rivendell :)**


	47. The Hobbit

**Nothing belongs to me except my OC **

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><p>For the past five minutes I had been listening to Nori babble and stammer as he tried to explain to me that, no, he wasn't jealous, that it was a matter of principle and so on. To be honest it was cuter than anything else. He was grumbling, not even daring to look at me and I couldn't help but smile. It was completely different to see him this way, his cheeks slightly tinged with red and gesturing with his hands as he tried to prove his point. At some point I even chuckled. This was when he stopped to try altogether.<p>

"I'm not jealous." He still added with a pout.

I cradled his face with both my hands and kept on smiling as I placed a light kiss on his lips.

"You don't have to be jealous." I whispered as his hands found my waist. "As soon as I saw you there, I couldn't see anyone else."

He groaned and let his forehead rest against mine as I chuckled again.

"Amelia, this is really, really not proper."

I shrugged. I honestly didn't care much. Their ideas were just a tad too annoying for me. I probably never would get used to their ridiculous standards so I might as well stop trying. Though, it was probably those standards that had them completely silent on the matter of the fountain. For this particular instance, I was rather glad they would find it improper to even mention it. Such a discussion would have been worse than awkward for both sides. But except for this particular matter, all these silly notions were quite bothering though. Still, I understood that they were important to Nori and for that, I would make an effort. It was just for him. It didn't matter what Nori could say, I didn't really care about what the other would think. Of course I would appreciate if they all understood that I loved Nori, but if some of them didn't, well, it wouldn't change my feelings.

A kiss brought me out of my thoughts and I looked at Nori.

I could barely see his face in the darkness. My fingers trailed in his beard and I felt more than saw that he was smiling. It made me smile too of course. I was just about to lean forwards once again to kiss him when he spoke and stopped me before I could even start to move.

"We really should try to find the hobbit."

I groaned.

"Really?"

"Mizimul, remember your promise." He softly whispered. "If mister Baggins goes back to the balcony without us, the others might start to question where we were and what we were doing."

"Do you really believe any of them care? And they wouldn't think immediately that we were doing anything improper, would they?"

Nori was silent for a second and it made my heart clench painfully. I wouldn't say I was afraid of what he might answer, but maybe I was a little.

"I wouldn't be so sure Amelia."

Alright, so that meant that some of them would care and that those ones would definitely not trust Nori and me to be together. I frowned and wondered who they were and why they would be so suspicious. I could have thought about it all night, but the truth was that I had no certitude about who it could be. And it was true that I had promised Nori I would be careful and would keep us a secret. I had broken too many promises already. I couldn't break this one. Especially not this one.

I sighed and stepped back.

"Alright, let's go find this mister Baggins."

Nori's hands were still on my waist but then he let go of me to take my left hand in his instead. Calmly we stepped out of the tree's protection.

"How do you plan on finding a, what's the name? A hobbit?" I saw him nod and continued. "So how do you plan on finding a hobbit at night in a maze?"

"It's not a maze." He chuckled. "It's a garden."

"It's the same." I shrugged.

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><p>I couldn't say how much time we spent walking in those gardens. We kept on teasing each other, speaking in low voices, and talking about nothing in particular. It was both very similar to what we would have done before, and different in the way that now there wasn't this uncomfortable tension between us anymore. It felt right to walk next to him. It felt right to just be with him.<p>

In the end we did find the hobbit but it was pure luck we did. It just so happened that we were walking up some stairs as mister Baggins decided to go down.

For a moment I saw him freeze in the stairs, clearly unsure of what to do. As soon as he had caught a glimpse of him, Nori had let go of my hand and had discreetly moved maybe an inch away from me. I immediately noticed it, which was really odd. I didn't comment though. I understood.

Instead I concentrated on the hobbit, who had remained frozen on the spot. Were we that scary?

"Good evening mister Baggins." I said, trying not to be too loud while still sounding cheerful.

"G, good evening." He stammered lightly before nodding in our direction.

We were now on the steps just below his and it brought us all more or less at the same level.

"We were worried you would be lost in the gardens." I said with a smile.

That seemed to surprise the hobbit quite a lot. He glanced between me and Nori and I could see clearly that he didn't really think anyone in our group would worry for him. I briefly wondered what my sweet dwarves had done for this man to be so suspicious of them.

"There was no need to worry." He finally replied. "I wasn't lost."

His tone wasn't nearly as friendly as mine. It was obvious he was trying to remain polite. Extremely polite in fact. I wasn't used to this kind of tone anymore. To be honest, I wasn't sure I had ever met anyone quite like that mister Baggins before. He was a bit odd. It felt as if he was keeping a distance from us. As if he didn't want to be too friendly and get too close.

"Ah well, you know I would still worry." I quickly decided to try and be as nice as possible. "I'm quite famous with the dwarves for getting lost easily. Isn't that right Nori?" I turned to look at the thief.

His face worn his emotionless mask and I quirked an eyebrow at him. Nori was clearly as good at reading me as I was at reading him. As soon as I looked at him and he saw my eyes his behaviour changed. It was obvious to me that he was forcing himself to smile. He clearly wasn't comfortable right now.

"Aye. She got lost in our Halls. The dwarves spent half a day looking for her."

From the corner of my eyes I saw the hobbit's own eyes widen in surprise and I felt my cheeks heat slightly. Well, if it helped us get closer to the man, I didn't mind the shame. It was nothing after all. It was all in the past, and most people, if not all, I knew already teased me about this little adventure.

"Ah well. I have a pretty good sense of direction myself." Mister Baggins commented, his tone not really being friendly, but still obviously less tensed than before. "I wouldn't get lost in those gardens."

"You're lucky." I immediately added. "I already lost my way twice. It was only because I managed to find elves both times that I'm not still wandering aimlessly around."

My stupid chatter was apparently successful as I finally saw a small smile on the hobbit's lips. It felt as if I had accomplished something. It was silly, but really, I realized then that I hadn't seen mister Baggins smile until that moment. It was more a slight quirk of his lips than an actual smile. But well, it was at least encouraging. It meant that he wasn't unfriendly, he probably just was uncomfortable. Dwarves could be quite overwhelming and it wasn't really that easy to get to know them. They often appeared grumpy, violent, rude and downright hostile. It was only when one got to knew them that all those unfriendly traits changed to give room to how loyal, honest, and cheerful they genuinely were.

"Well." Nori was the next one to talk. "We should go back now."

Instantly the small smile disappeared from the hobbit's face and I barely managed not to groan. Nori wasn't usually so clueless. I found it odd as he ordinarily was more observant than that. It was almost as if he didn't care. Well. He probably didn't. I sighed before smiling at the hobbit.

"Let's go. We wouldn't want dwarves to start running around looking for us."

"No." Mister Baggins paled visibly; even in the moonlight it was obvious. "We wouldn't want that."

Nori snorted before he started to walk down the stairs. I followed him, the hobbit just behind me.

In a matter of minutes, maybe not even half an hour, we were back in the corridor leading to the balcony where the dwarves were. As we arrived in sight of the door, I realized that with mister Baggins there I would have to behave as if there was nothing between me and Nori. I frowned, realizing only now that I wouldn't be able to hug him before we had to separate in front of the others. This promise was already starting to annoy me terribly. It didn't feel right to act as if nothing had happened between the two of us. I hated putting on a show for the other dwarves' sake. It wasn't right. It wasn't the lie that bothered me. It was more the fact that during these moments I had to act as if Nori didn't mean that much to me. It didn't sit well with me. It hurt me deeply actually.

I glanced at Nori's impassive face and wondered if he felt the same way.

At this moment our gazes met.

Yes he did.

I clenched my fists. There was no other way. Not for now. We had to act normally and it hurt. But it suddenly appeared to me that we truly had no choice. There were too many other things that were more important than us. We were just two people. This mission was important to a whole community. It was this fact, more than any talk about proper actions, that had me act against my wishes and instinct.

While I had been having those thoughts, we had arrived in front of the doors. Nori pushed them open without looking back at me. It was better this way. I wasn't sure I would have been able to hide my feelings quickly in front of the others. Thankfully, most of them were already lying, half asleep probably, and the others just glanced up at us before going back to what they were doing. I caught Dori's frown but didn't ponder on it.

After sending a smile to the hobbit and ignoring Nori, which broke my heart, I walked to Dori and Ori and wordlessly prepared my bunk. I didn't exchange a word with Dori who seemed to observe me from the corner of his eye, or with Ori who was already asleep. I just quickly prepared my stuff and then lied down. I caught a glimpse of Nori and sighed. Then only did I close my eyes.

Thankfully, that night, I managed to fall asleep rather quickly.

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><p>I jolted awake, gasping loudly.<p>

Immediately my brain provided me with several details.

First it wasn't dawn yet. The dying embers of the small fire were the only source of light with the moon. Second, I had been crying. I could tell by the unmistakable wetness on my cheeks. Third, Nori was here. He was probably the one who had forced me to wake. I could feel his warm hand on my shoulder. Instantly as I realized that, my eyes looked for his.

Without any hesitation I sat up and turned to face him. I was against his chest in a matter of seconds and, gingerly, he helped me stand before he swiftly gathered me in his arms and carried me away from his still sleeping brothers.

He brought me to the bench where he had probably spent the night. I could see his blanket and coat there. He cautiously put me down on the bench. He was treating me as if I was some sort of fragile china that could break at the first shock. At that particular moment, I didn't mind. He placed the blanket around my shoulders before he sat and once more gathered me in his arms. He was leaning against the stone pillar, one foot on the bench, the other on the floor. I didn't even bother to think through my actions, I leant on him, bringing my feet up on the bench.

I was slightly shivering.

Nori didn't say a word, silently hugging me against him. I was glad that he was here. I was glad that he was still helping me, shooing my fears away even though the others were there too.

I sighed loudly and closed my eyes.

Memories of my nightmare came back to the forefront of my mind and I shuddered. After awhile, I felt like I could speak again. Just as we had done sadly so many times before in the Halls, I started to whisper to him. I slowly went through the images that had haunted my nightmares. I felt as if they would soon become usual. That night though, the man had been replaced by the dwarves on the stick. I had seen my friends slowly being cooked by the trolls and simply speaking about it had me in tears again. I felt weak but in front of Nori, I didn't care so much.

Nori provided some silent support. Gently he rubbed my back and arm. My ear was pressed on his chest, just slightly above his heart, and the regular thump was enough to slowly calm my nerves.

I felt Nori tense at some point, but I didn't react, I kept on softly whispering the images I had seen. Maybe they disturbed him too. When I opened my eyes though, I saw that Balin was sitting on his bunk. Oddly enough, I didn't react. I looked at him sadly as he stood up and came silently towards us.

Only when he was close did my brain remind me that my position probably wasn't proper. Then I remembered the promise I had made and my heart started to beat faster in worry of what Balin would think. I tensed and Nori sensed it. Instead of pushing me, he held me tighter, showing me that he didn't intend on letting me go just yet. Feeling reassured I sluggishly closed my eyes for a short moment until Balin spoke.

"What happened?" My old guardian whispered.

"Nightmare." Nori replied to the point.

Balin nodded and crouched to look at me in the eyes.

"Are you alright my dear?"

At this point I realized that the light had changed. The sun was probably about to rise, just like a few more dwarves just started to do. Soon, Thorin and Bofur were next to Balin. I was too tired and shaken by my nightmare to even feel embarrassed.

"What's this?" Thorin growled in a very low voice.

"Nightmares." This time, Balin was the one to speak.

The King quirked an eyebrow at me before he too, crouched in front of me. He looked me in the eyes and I didn't blink. Emotionally exhausted, I remained motionless as he observed me. I wasn't sure what he thought he saw, or what he actually saw but after a short while he stood back up and gestured at Nori.

"Explain."

I felt Nori shrug. He was probably trying to find an excuse for our position when I felt my lips move on their own accord and heard my shaky voice whisper.

"Nori helps." I closed my eyes and felt a tear roll down my cheek. "He listens."

After that I felt even more tired. I didn't want to deal with the dwarves' disapproval right now. I didn't need that. I needed Nori and I didn't care what the other thought of it. Surprisingly, Bofur's serious voice was the next one I heard.

"The trolls and the man again?" He whispered so low I almost didn't hear him.

He was probably hoping I wouldn't. I had barely been able to make out his words, but still I shuddered as they brought back memories, both real and dreamt, of the trolls and their meal.

"Aye. She saw us." Nori's rumbling voice was just as low as Bofur's.

The four dwarves were silent for a short while before Balin spoke once more.

"You seem used to it."

I wasn't sure what my guardian meant by that. My eyes remained closed and they probably thought I was falling asleep again because his whisper was a bit more audible. My mind was becoming a bit hazy, and I realized that maybe he wasn't wrong. I was starting to relax and I felt one of my hands, the one that had been on Nori's arm, loosen its grip without me consciously wanting to.

"She periodically has nightmares." Nori replied softly.

I imagined that Balin was nodding, but I didn't want to open my eyes to make sure he was. In this weird state between awareness and slumber, I wasn't really controlling my thoughts or moves anymore. As I lay there, slowly dozing off, I started to wonder what they would say. Would they disapprove of this? Would they find it improper for me to be there, in Nori's arms, even though he was helping me?

"I remember Dori said something about it." Bofur commented. "She's used to talk to you when she has them, right? Not anyone else."

I briefly wondered why Bofur would ask such a question. His voice didn't seem teasing in the least. He was definitely serious. Even though I wanted to know what was going on then, I kept my eyes closed and didn't move. I felt Nori nod. I fully expected Bofur to speak some more, but to my surprise, it was Thorin's voice that I heard then.

"She'll need to sleep when we're back on the road." He said in a grim tone. "If your presence is the one that helps, then starting tomorrow, pack your bunk next to hers. There's no point in having you sneak around our camp if we can help it."

"Aye. It'll only risk waking all of us." Bofur said and I noticed his voice was slightly more cheery then. "And maybe she'll sleep better with you there."

I heard someone sigh loudly and mutter something in Khuzdul before Bofur chuckled lightly.

"Now, now Thorin. I'll tell Dís you said that. I'm not sure she'll appreciate."

I heard Thorin groan before footsteps indicated to me that someone, probably him, was leaving. It was confirmed a few seconds later when Balin spoke.

"Be careful Nori. She's still my ward."

After those few words, I heard footsteps once more. I couldn't have opened my eyes if I wanted to. My thoughts seemed slower now. I could still hear the discussion around me, but I didn't really register the meaning of the words anymore.

"You couldn't just shut up, could you?" Nori said rather sharply.

"Ow, no need to thank me old friend." Bofur replied cheekily and I could easily picture his crooked smile.

"Dori is going to have a fit." Nori sighed.

Before I fell completely asleep I still heard one last exchange between Bofur and Nori.

"Well, it'll pass. There's not much he can do about it, right?" Bofur's voice was once more serious when he next spoke. "Is she..."

"Maybe." Nori quickly cut in.

The last thing I thought was that Bofur probably was Nori's closest friend, because the usually silent thief always answered to the cheeky dwarf's question.

* * *

><p>I awoke peacefully much later. The sun was shining brightly above the horizon. I was honestly pleased to find out that I was still in Nori's arms. I didn't move at first and remained in the exact same position than the one I had when I slept. I wanted to stay there for a little bit more and I knew that as soon as I would wake, I would have to move.<p>

At this particular instant though, I was perfectly happy with where I was.

Well, at least I was until I heard a well known voice rumble in a low tone.

"Are you going to stay here all day? I'm not sure Dwalin will appreciate you skipping training."

I groaned loudly and, admitting that I was awake, sat back up. Immediately I glanced around and saw that, unfortunately, many dwarves were here. Actually, as soon as I left the comfort of Nori's arms, I heard Ori's voice loudly call me.

"Amee!" I looked up to see him quickly walk to me. "Did you have a nightmare again?" He asked in a much lower voice when he was close enough. "Are you alright?"

I exhaled slowly and nodded, forcing my lips into a smile.

"I will be, don't worry. You know me. I always have nightmares."

I sounded resigned. To be entirely honest, I probably was. It was most annoying for me to always deal with whatever happened to me with terrifying nightmares. Since I had arrived in this world, I probably had gone through more of them than ever in my previous life. Well, I had more reasons and images to put into nightmares too, but that wasn't the point. The point was that I really would have liked to deal with my fears in another way. Nightmares weren't something I particularly enjoyed experiencing. Would anyone?

Now it seemed that I was grumpy.

I sighed and rubbed my forehead. There was nothing I could do about it, so it was best to just ignore it all.

"I prepared some chamomile, if you want some." Dori appeared behind Ori, a steaming cup in his hands.

Smiling genuinely at his kind gesture, I took the cup. It probably was just what I needed right now.

"Thanks."

I grabbed the cup and, softly blowing on the liquid, I glanced at Nori. He hadn't moved, still leaning against the pillar. I frowned, only realizing now that it had to be uncomfortable for him. He had spent half the night like this. He was looking at the scenery, seemingly not paying attention to us. I could tell that it was just an act though. His shoulders were tense, he was completely motionless, as if all his muscles were frozen in this position, waiting to bounce at the first sign he had to. It reminded me of some feline which would stop moving just before jumping on their prey...or of a rabbit caught in the car's lights.

"You should have woken us up Amelia." Dori said with a frown.

"I didn't want to Dori. I already woke Nori. Two of us having a bad night because of my dreams is annoying enough already." I sighed before sipping my tea.

"Well, don't hesitate next time." He still insisted. "Dwalin told me you should go to the training grounds as early as possible."

I nodded.

Training was worst here than it had ever been. Apparently the dwarves were intent on transforming me into some sort of efficient fighter before we left the elvish grounds. I wasn't running laps anymore. I wasn't repeating moves endlessly either. No. All this had been child's play as Dwalin had put it. And apparently, children weren't allowed on this quest, so I had to train like an adult.

Training like an adult apparently meant to spar endlessly with Bifur and Dwalin. It meant that if they were sparing with someone else, then I would spar against Gloin or even Fili and Kili. I had only trained once like this, and I could already say that I both loved and hated it.

It was really sad to realize that I was that weak compared to all of them. The good thing though, was that when I used my staff, I was able to hit them back from time to time too.

That morning, I found myself facing the imposing form of Dwalin.

"Let's start lass. Show me all your tricks."

I nodded and strengthened my grip on my staff. I allowed my mind to go blank. Well. This expression wasn't entirely correct. My mind wasn't blank. It was completely, solely focused on the fight against Dwalin. I forgot about the others sparing around us. They were still there, in a corner of my mind because I had to know where they were, but the noise they made seemed to fade in the background.

Dwalin was the first to move. He only took one step on his right side. I instantly mirrored his movement. I didn't even need to think about it. He seemed to gauge me for awhile but soon he attacked. I dodged and avoided contact at first, up until the point when I saw him leave his side open. Without even thinking I used this weakness, I stepped aside and let my staff hit his ribs. He merely grunted retaliating with a wide move that had me crouch very low to avoid being hit in the head.

I had no idea how long we spent sparing, but at some point my brain told me that the noise in the background had changed. I couldn't hear the dwarves spar anymore. I used an evasive move to quickly glance around. I reacted instinctively when I saw a dark shape behind me. Crouching yet again to dodge Dwalin's attack, this time I didn't place my staff in front of me. Instead I sharply sent it behind me, aiming to hit the dark shape.

When I jumped back to my feet I parried an attack from Dwalin, hit his wrist and turned to stop a wooden sword from hitting my back. In the same quick move I side stepped and, without even looking at my second opponent, I sent a kick in his kneecap before using the metallic part of my staff to hit his shoulder.

Then without stopping I jumped away and finally realized that Dwalin wasn't following me.

As no other attacks came my way, I took it as a sign that the spar was over.

I gathered my bearings again and, breathing heavily, I looked around.

The dwarves were all observing me. I could tell from their faces that they approved of what they had just seen. Then I looked at Dwalin. He was leaning against the large wooden axe he used for the spar. He seemed oddly pleased. Then only did I look at the other dwarf.

Immediately I paled.

I had hit the King. I had kicked Thorin in the knee and hit his shoulder.

As soon as those thoughts crossed my mind I blushed terribly.

"I'm so sorry." I blurted out. "I..." I had nothing to say for my defence.

I dared look up and met the icy blue eyes that somehow managed to make me feel like a young child. Except this time, he wasn't glaring at me. I could tell he was still gauging me, like Dwalin had been earlier.

"Not bad, girl. You might not be such a hindrance after all." He said in a surprisingly even tone. "Keep up with your training. I want you to be able to win a spar against one of us before we leave."

After he pronounced those rather ominous words, he turned away and left. I stood frozen on the spot while my friends gathered around me. Kili was particularly vocal in his praise.

"You were amazing Amelia! The way you kicked uncle Thorin was so funny!" He let his arm fall heavily on my shoulder. "And you managed to keep up with master Dwalin too!"

"You did very well Meli." Bofur complimented me and I finally smiled.

"You'll have to keep on practicing lass, but we might yet make a dwarf out of you." Gloin said, but I could tell from the twinkle in his eyes that he was proud of me.

Balin and Dori were clearly relieved to see that I wasn't completely defenceless. My eyes caught sight of Nori as he was standing slightly away. No one but me was looking at him and he used this second to wink at me before offering me one of his true, kind smile that I loved so much.

Then only did the reality of Thorin's words hit me.

Win a spar? Against one of the dwarves?

Was he crazy?

* * *

><p>I sighed loudly. Letting my head fall back I lightly bumped it against the stone pillar. I closed my eyes and sighed again. It seemed that it was the only thing I could do right then. I tried to let the silence around me soothe my worries. Thorin's words were strangely disheartening. I couldn't understand how he could expect me to win a spar against one of the warriors. What would he do if I couldn't achieve this goal? Would he force me to stay here, forgetting all about the contract? The dwarves were training again, but they had agreed to let me rest until the middle of the afternoon. Humans didn't have as much endurance as dwarves and overdoing it would be stupid. Besides I had the feeling that even a lot of training wouldn't help me to achieve this goal that Thorin set for me.<p>

I opened my eyes and let them trail over the shelves full of books and scrolls. I had found the library a bit earlier that afternoon. I liked this place. Contrarily to what it often was, this library was full of light. High openings on the walls allowed fresh air and sunlight to come in easily. There were rows after rows of high shelves that went up to the ceiling and each of those shelves was covered in books and parchments.

Under each opening there was a wooden bench and I was currently sitting on one of those. I had brought my feet up and my arms rested on my bended knees. Turning my head slightly to the side, I looked at the scenery outside. It seemed that every time I watched, my heart would feel somehow appeased.

Looking back towards the room I felt a pang of sadness. It was painful to be so close to so much knowledge and not being able to do anything about it.

I really had to ask Ori to teach me to read. Now that I thought about it, I realized that I hadn't had any Khuzdul lessons in a while either. I would have to remedy to that. Maybe it could be something that would occupy my mind when we would leave this place.

The sound of a door opening brought me out of my thoughts.

I looked up, expecting to see one of those elves. Instead I met the kind, if slightly suspicious eyes of one hobbit.

He was apparently startled to see me here.

Well, I was surprised to meet him in this library too. If I had to bet on which of my companions would find the library and meet me there, I would have placed all my bets on Ori.

We looked at each other for a second until I let my feet fall back on the ground and stood up.

"Mister Baggins," I said with a smile. "Do you by any chance like to read?"

He seemed slightly puzzled but after a second, he squared his shoulder and placed his thumbs in his jacket's pockets. Bouncing slightly on the ball of his huge feet and raising his chin, he looked at me and replied.

"I am quite the avid reader, yes."

I nodded and looked at the shelves around us.

"It's unfortunate most of those are written in the language of elves." I muttered, even though it didn't change anything to my personal inability to read in this world.

"It doesn't bother me. I can read some of it too." He said proudly before he seemed to deflate a bit. "Not that it would be useful on this...quest."

A sudden idea struck my mind and my smile widened.

"Oh, I wouldn't be quite so certain of that mister Baggins."

He glanced at me once more, clearly intrigued by my tone. He quirked an eyebrow at me and I walked to him, still smiling.

* * *

><p>I had truly no idea how much time had passed when I heard some noise coming from the corridor. Soon after, the door opened widely, and then two dwarves barged in disturbing the quiet of the place. I blinked at the sight of Gloin and Oin. The hobbit had stopped to read at the same time and we both looked rather startled as the dwarves walked to the table where we were.<p>

"Lass, do you know what time it is?" Gloin said grumpily. "You missed your training and no one knew where you were."

I blinked once again. Then I looked around and realized that the sun was quite low in the horizon. Cautiously I put the piece of charcoal I used as a pencil down and rubbed my tired eyes.

"I'm sorry Gloin, but Bilbo..."

"Bilbo? Is it mister Baggins' fault that you missed your training?" Gloin cut in.

I knew he was about to rant even before he started. So instead of letting him unfairly chastise Bilbo, I cut in sharply.

"Yes, Bilbo and I spent the afternoon together. And no, it's not his fault I missed training." I sighed loudly and looked at Oin, certain he would understand. "Bilbo was kind enough to read and translate for me some of the medical books we found here."

After saying that I took my notebook and showed the dwarves all the notes I had taken. Of course they wouldn't be able to understand any of it, but at least they could see we hadn't been idle that day.

"We found some very interesting chapters." I continued as the two brothers were silent. "Today I wanted to find out what the elves knew of the treatment of burns. It was really interesting. Bilbo even drew some of the plants that were named in those chapters."

Bilbo chose that moment to hand his very precise drawings to Oin. The healer took them and nodded.

"Aye, I know this one." He said pointing at one picture. "Never seen those though." He frowned at the other pictures.

"I am sorry for worrying you, but I thought this was important too." I looked at Gloin, sincerely apologizing for having let them wait on the training grounds. "And once we started, I just didn't pay attention to time."

He grumbled a bit before he glanced at the hobbit then me.

"Aye, well." He scratched his ear a bit before speaking. "You're a healer, not a warrior. You'll train more, tomorrow morning."

I smiled at him and didn't try to resist the urge to hug him. He staggered a bit but still patted my back kindly.

"Thanks for understanding Gloin." I said cheerily. "I'll train really hard tomorrow." I then turned to look at my new friend. "Do you mind translating some other chapters for me tomorrow?"

Bilbo cleared his throat and glanced at the dwarves uneasily before he answered.

"No. No it's fine. Those books are very interesting."

I smiled at him too. I had found out that afternoon that our hobbit was a rather calm and quiet person. It was a bit odd to meet someone like that after living with dwarves for the past years. Even Ori, who was by any account very quiet for a dwarf, was loud and blunt compared to the hobbit. We hadn't spoken much, but it was clear that Bilbo was uncomfortable in the presence of the dwarves.

He had told me that a man named Gandalf had more or less tricked him into joining the quest. Well, he had said the man was a wizard but I couldn't honestly believe those words. Bilbo had probably called him like that as some sort of insult. I had then found out that the old man wearing grey robes was this Gandalf person.

It was a bit strange that I hadn't met him in person yet since we arrived here. When I had said so to Bilbo, he had simply shrugged and replied that wizard were often busy and came and went as they pleased.

Forgetting about this Gandalf, I soon came to discuss various things with Bilbo. I would be honest and admit that I truly enjoyed finally speaking with him. He was kind, if a bit shy, and very curious about several things. He reminded me of Ori a bit. For the first part of the afternoon he had told me about the Shire and its inhabitants. I learned quite a lot about hobbits and their customs. As Ori had put it, they clearly were a peaceful folk. They couldn't be more different from the dwarves.

I truly liked spending some time with Bilbo, but I soon realized what Nori had said might be true. Even though he was here with us, Bilbo didn't really want to be. He clearly didn't know what he was doing in this company. He had no idea why he had chosen to follow the dwarves.

Somehow it reminded me a bit of my arrival in this world. Even though the situation couldn't be more different, I couldn't help but recall how I had followed Dori, Nori and Ori without knowing why. There had been no reasons back then. I was just uncomfortable with the men I had met in that first town. I had followed the dwarves on a hunch. It was nothing but a whim. Looking back, I could tell that this decision had changed my life irrevocably.

Even if I were to be magically sent back to my previous world now, I knew that I would never be the same.

I had changed.

The dwarves had noticed it.

I had noticed it.

Inadvertently my fingers moved to brush one of my daggers' handle.

I smiled. This life within the Halls had made me stronger. I smirked when I thought back about the bullies that had bothered me. At a time it had felt as if this was important. I could remember feeling that those jabs and words were hurtful and probably the most terrible things I could go through.

It hadn't been.

Now I could see it.

Those bullies would have a heart attack now if they saw me. Or maybe they wouldn't care. I knew deep inside myself that I wouldn't, not anymore. Many people now mattered in my life. Nori of course was the most important dwarf in my heart. But all the others weren't that far behind him. It was just a matter of what type of love I felt for them, not how much.

Following the three brothers had been a quick decision. At the time I hadn't even thought it through. Yet this decision had ended up being one of the most important of my life, changing me, changing who I was, deeply.

As I walked next to Oin, following Gloin and with Bilbo not far behind, I couldn't help but wonder how this would change him.

I had no illusions that this quest, no matter how it would end, would change the kind hearted hobbit. I had no idea why or how, but I was certain that, by the end of it, Bilbo wouldn't be the same. The wilderness, the struggles or the dwarves maybe, something would change forever the hobbit he was.

I looked at him and smiled slightly as we stepped in the balcony where the others were.

Yes. He'd change.

"Amelia!"

I looked up as I heard my name and saw Dori, Ori and Balin come closer.

"Where were you?" Dori asked with a relieved smile.

I could tell that, even though this place was safe, he had been worried.

"I was in the library with Bilbo. You should join us tomorrow." I turned towards Ori as I said this. "He helped me translate some medical texts. It might be useful later on, though I hope we won't need it."

"Really?" Ori hummed. "I guess I could come with you two then."

I smiled widely before Dori sternly interrupted us.

"I want you to be more serious about your training Amelia."

"I'm sorry Dori but..." I tried to say, somehow startled by his tone.

"There's no but. You want to be treated like an adult, then behave so." He chastised me. "You run off and don't take your training seriously. It is disrespectful to let Dwalin, Bifur and Gloin wait for you to arrive. This morning we let it go, because of the circumstances, but do not miss any of your trainings from now on."

I blinked at Dori's stern and rather cold tone and blushed in shame.

"I, I'm sorry." I said in a small voice.

I wasn't used to Dori speaking like this to me. It felt odd. Really odd actually. I could tell from the silence around that all the dwarves had heard his words and I felt deeply embarrassed. I felt like a child and for a second I hated Dori for making me feel this way. I glanced around and saw in the others' faces that they agreed with my guardian. I met Nori's eyes, he was whittling on the other side of the balcony, and I realized that for once he agreed with his brother too.

I looked down at my feet right then.

I wasn't a child anymore, but somehow, to these men, I would always be. Even when I would turn eighty, if I was lucky enough to live to that day, then I would still be a child compared to their age.

I wasn't a child and hated to be treated like one.

Still, I could be honest enough to realize that maybe Dori was right.

I felt as if I had to prove myself once again to them.

"I didn't pay attention to the time as we were working." I softly said before I walked away from Dori.

I shouldn't apologize to him after all. I walked to Dwalin, who was sitting next to Thorin. I looked up to meet his stern gaze and bowed my head slightly.

"I apologize Dwalin, it wasn't my intention to be rude. I will be more careful from now on."

He grunted and nodded. I knew he accepted this apology, but I only had this one chance. I really couldn't mess up anymore. I then turned to go to Bifur, Bofur and Bombur. Ignoring the later two, I looked at the dwarf with an axe embedded in his head.

"Me..." I cleared my throat and licked my lips before I tried to enunciate properly. "Men gajamu."

Bifur seemed pleased to hear me speak in Khuzdul, though I wasn't confident in my pronunciation.

"Men kemgu gajum menu." He replied and I had to glance at Bofur because I wasn't entirely certain of the meaning.

Bofur smiled and nodded approvingly.

"Well, it seems like those lessons in Khuzdul weren't completely useless then." Bofur said, winking at me. "But your pronunciation is awful, you should practice more."

"Thanks Bofur." I pulled a face.

"You're welcome." He had the cheek to reply.

I rolled my eyes and sat next to Bombur. As was common with the dwarves, the matter was forgotten as soon as the meat started to cook over the fire. The smell still bothered me and I took refuge next to Nori who hadn't moved or said anything since I came back from the library. He kept on whittling but, when I asked him what he was doing, he simply shrugged and put the piece of wood in his pocket before taking his pipe out.

I quirked an eyebrow at him but he just shrugged then smirked lightly.

"Fine, keep your secrets, sneaky thief." I whispered but I couldn't stop my lips from smiling as I said those words.

Nori snorted and winked at me.

I sighed and we both relaxed while the others cooked.

Later that evening I realized that Dori was quite angry because of the fact that Nori placed his bunk next to mine. He kept silent, but the glare he sent towards his younger brother spoke volume. It made me frown, but as Nori didn't say a word I didn't comment. Actually I turned my back to Nori, facing Ori who was scribbling in his notebook.

"Were the others really angry when I didn't show up?" I whispered as low as possible.

Ori glanced at me but then kept writing as he replied.

"Not really. They kept training any way." He whispered before glancing at me once again and smiling kindly. "Don't worry about Dori's words. I'm not too sure what it is, but he's been rather angry these past few days."

"Maybe it's the fact that I'm here." I sighed.

Ori stopped to write and thought a bit.

"I thought so too at first, but I'm not too sure anymore." He placed the notebook next to his bag and rested his head on his hand before looking at me. "I don't really know what got into him."

"Well, I guess we'll find out sooner or later." I shrugged. "Maybe he's just nervous about the quest."

"Maybe." Ori didn't seem convinced at all by this idea though. "But I don't think so."

"You know something!" I frowned.

He sent me a strange look right then but didn't comment.

"What is it?" I insisted, leaning a bit closer to him.

"It isn't my secret to tell."

My frown deepened. I observed Ori for a second and knew perfectly that he wouldn't say a word on the topic if he didn't want to.

"Fine." I sighed. "Keep your secrets too, but I'll find out what this is all about."

I wasn't really angry at him, but it did annoy me greatly that he wouldn't let me know something. It felt as if he didn't trust me. Frowning, I was honest enough with myself to admit this wasn't the case, it was just my bad mood speaking. Ori sensed that I wasn't really up for a discussion that night, and he didn't want to add anything on that topic, so he smiled kindly at me and patted my hand.

"Everyone has secrets Amelia. But most of the time, they don't stay so secret forever."

After that, Ori smiled and turned his back to me, wordlessly telling me that the discussion was over.

I lied on my back and looked at the ceiling for a few minutes. Nori wasn't there, Dori wasn't there either. I sat up and frowned. Something was going on. I would have to ask Nori, and if he didn't answer my questions, well, then I would have to find a way to make him talk.

I looked around, most of the dwarves were sleeping already. Lying back down I tried to forget about all this mystery.

I wasn't asleep when Dori and Nori came back from wherever they had gone to. From the looks on both their faces it was obvious that neither of them was happy. I smiled at Nori when he sat on his bunk. His face changed almost instantly and he smiled kindly back.

I turned to face him and, hidden by both our blankets, I grabbed his hand and squeezed it lightly before closing my eyes. I could only hope that his presence near me would be enough to soothe me into a dreamless sleep.

* * *

><p>It was Nori's hand on my cheek that awoke me. The night was still dark and I knew from the rapid pace of my heart that I had been having a bad dream. I looked at Nori and he simply came closer to me and kissed my forehead.<p>

"Alright?" He whispered near my ear, making me shiver as his lips grazed the skin there.

I nodded and scouted a bit closer to him. His thumb kept on caressing my cheek. After a short while, I was feeling better. Apparently Nori had managed to wake me before the whole nightmare experience really started. I had been feeling uncomfortable when he woke me up, but I wasn't afraid or distressed. It seemed that the idea of him sleeping closer to me might have been helping.

"Why were you and Dori fighting earlier?" I whispered.

"Don't worry about that Sanmizim." He sighed.

"Nori, you would tell me if it were important?" I asked.

"I would if you could do something about it." He answered. "For now don't worry about Dori. Trust me."

I couldn't help but frown at his words.

"Alright." I replied after a short moment.

Soon enough I was asleep again. I trusted Nori completely. I knew that he would tell me what was going on. After all, I had been the only one he had trusted with his secret before. I didn't see what he would hide from me now.

* * *

><p>The following days were all spent in the same way.<p>

I would wake early, eat and follow the dwarves to the training grounds. There I would spend my time sparing with them. I used mostly my staff, but at some point Gloin insisted that I trained more with my daggers too. We usually would train until lunch. Right after I would go to the library with Ori and Bilbo and spend a few hours with them before I had to go back to the training grounds.

I would then train again until the dwarves decided to stop. Then we would go back to the balcony, I would eat and sleep. And repeat it all the following day. Soon a week had passed since our arrival here.

And in that time I hadn't got a single moment to spend with Nori alone.

It was rather sad and annoying that we just couldn't escape away from the others for a few minutes.

I was so tired after training so much that I needed the little sleep I could get between nightmares. And no matter how much I might want it, I just couldn't find any good excuses to get away from the others on my own or with Nori.

I honestly couldn't believe it.

This secrecy thing was driving me crazy. I had been so happy to find out that Nori felt the same way towards me than I did towards him. Actually, no. I hadn't been happy. I had been overjoyed. I could still remember that I had felt as if my heart would burst out of my chest. Just thinking about those few moments spent together was enough to make me all giddy. The giddiness was short lived though, especially each time I remembered that I couldn't be open in my feelings for him.

Then there was the matter that Dori had been a bit grumpy for awhile. He and Nori had barely exchanged a word with one another during the whole week.

I didn't understand what was going on. Ori was tight lipped and just bluntly refused to say a word about it. For the past two days I felt as if Bofur and Balin knew something about what was going on, but neither of them spoke. Actually they didn't even speak with Dori and Nori either.

As the time passed I realized that the dwarves were growing more tensed and I finally understood that it probably was linked to the map. They were getting anxious to have it deciphered. They wanted to get going. Maybe Dori and Nori too were simply growing restless.

During that time, I spent long hours writing notes that Bilbo translated for me.

The hobbit was a strange man. He was so very different from the dwarves. Maybe this was partly the reason why I appreciated him quite so much. I could tell though that, even if he was a bit more relaxed around me now, he was still uncomfortable around us all. If I had to guess, I would say he didn't quite know what his role in the company was. Sure, he was supposed to be the burglar, but honestly he didn't look the part.

"Bilbo!" I called him when I saw him in the gardens. "Wait, I'm coming!" I was in stairs and quickly got down them.

I was alone. I had hoped that Nori would somehow find a way to follow me, but as soon as I said I would go in the gardens for awhile, Dori had asked his younger brother to train Ori. Apparently Ori wasn't the least surprised by this. I had quickly got out as I knew that some heated discussion was about to start and I honestly wanted no part in it.

I was happy to find my way to the hobbit.

"Hey Bilbo. What have you been up to?"

"Well, I was just wandering around." He replied in a soft tone. "I like this place. I don't really want to leave." He said melancholically before adding in a whisper, "Ever."

"I share the feeling." I said with a smile.

And I truly did, to some extent at least. Imladris was a beautiful place. It was too beautiful for my taste though, but I would never say so aloud, at least not the hobbit or in any place where an elf could hear.

He snorted.

It completely stopped my trail of thoughts.

"What is it?" I asked him, honestly surprised by his reaction.

"Oh, come on." He said, astonishing me.

Clearly he saw I didn't understand what he meant to say because he looked surprised and continued.

"You really think we share that feeling?" His eyebrows went up to his hairlines. "Oh come on Amelia. You are with them, with the dwarves."

"Yeah, just like you are too." I commented with a frown, uncertain of what he meant.

"No." He shook his head. "Not really. I'm just following them. I don't even know why I'm following them."

"Bilbo. I know they can be a bit, well, overwhelming at time." I tried to calm him as he was clearly a bit upset.

"A bit over, a bit overwhelming?" He was shocked by my words. "Amelia, they threw food over the table, they ate everything in my cellar! They came in, uninvited and then they acted as if I was the weird person. They are rude, unfriendly and really, really not the kind of person any proper hobbit would want to follow."

Wow. Clearly this had been brewing in his head for awhile.

"Bilbo, you have to give them a chance. I know dwarves can appear exactly as you described them, but once you get to know them you see how different they are." I walked toward the smaller man and placed a hand on his shoulder. "Dwarves are honest, loyal and they would do just about anything for those they care about. I'm sure you'll see it with time." I felt bad for the hobbit, who clearly had a hard time adapting to the dwarves' habits. "Just, give them a chance."

"Did they give me one?" He whispered, looking at the ground between us.

"I'm sorry, what did you just say?" I hadn't quite caught his words.

"Right from the start, they decided I wasn't worth their time. Right from the start they decided to mock me, despise me. They didn't give me a chance. Why should I let them have one?"

I was taken aback by the tone of his voice. The sweet, almost shy Bilbo could apparently feel anger too. It shouldn't have surprised me. Everyone was entitled to feel that way sometimes. But it did annoy me that he was so angry against the dwarves. I knew I wasn't being objective. I couldn't. Not when the dwarves were concerned. I just couldn't. The dwarves were my family, my kin, and I was proud of this fact.

Like I had told Bilbo, dwarves were loyal and honest. I couldn't become a dwarf, but living with them had influenced me into being similar to them.

"You know Bilbo," I said somewhat colder. "If no one makes an effort, then the situation just won't change. If you truly wanted to be a part of this, you could."

After those words I turned back and simply left Bilbo behind.

I turned behind a fence made of bushes that surrounded the area and almost collided with a tall elf. Looking up I barely resisted the urge to groan loudly. If there was one elf around I didn't want to meet, it was that one.

"Lord Glorfindel." I bowed my head slightly, forcing myself to be polite.

"Lady Amelia." He replied in a similar fashion.

We remained silent for an instant. Just as I was about to excuse myself and leave, he started to speak.

"You know my Lady, for a human, you trust the dwarves quite a lot."

He was looking at me as if he was observing some kind of interesting animal or object. At least it was how I perceived his piercing gaze. This elf was rude. Who did he think he was? It felt as if he thought he was almighty. I clenched my fists.

"So?" I almost snapped at him.

"It is unusual." He commented simply.

Tilting his head to the side slightly he kept his gaze on me, observing me unwaveringly. He didn't even seem bothered by the fact that I didn't appreciate him, or his attitude towards me.

"Dwarves saved my life. More than once." I narrowed my eyes at him.

"That's honourable." He admitted. "But maybe you should be more cautious."

"What do you want to say, my lord? Please speak clearly." I didn't have any patience for this elf. I didn't like him for some reason I couldn't really explain. It probably was just a matter of first impressions, and the one I had of this tall lord was really, really terrible.

"Dwarves have a tendency to betray those who aren't dwarves themselves. They never will fully trust any other race, no matter how much they care for the one person."

He spoke as if he was simply stating facts. He was calm and collected. I, on the contrary, was starting to feel my heart beat faster. His words, or his attitude maybe, something about this encounter was making me really uneasy.

"What do you know anyway?" This time I snapped and glared at him.

"Your hobbit friend isn't wrong in what he says. Dwarves aren't as kind as you seem to think. Remember this."

"It was a private conversation." I hissed before adding coldly. "It doesn't matter to you anyway."

My anger was quite obvious when I left him there. I was still angry when I stepped on the balcony where the dwarves were.

I didn't care what they all could say. The dwarves wouldn't betray me. I loved them. I might not be a dwarf, but I was one of their wards. I had been accepted. They were teaching me their runes and Khuzdul.

No.

They wouldn't betray me. Never.

I kept repeating those thoughts in my mind, even as I was lying between Ori and Nori. I was certain they wouldn't betray me. At the very least, the brothers wouldn't. Nori wouldn't.

They wouldn't...

So why did I somehow have this uneasy feeling in my chest right then?

* * *

><p><strong>AN: I can only apologize for the months that have passed without me updating. Just know that I have no intention of letting this story unfinished. Sometimes though, my life becomes a bit too hectic for me to be able to write. I haven't been able to, for several reasons, in the past months and I have been kept fairly busy with other things too. I can only hope that you will all understand. This story is huge and, as I have said several times already, it is honestly difficult for me to write the quest. You all know by now that I don't want to just rewrite something you've read a hundred times, but well, it can't be helped in a way and this blocks me a bit when I'm attempting to write. No worries, I will finish it, but it is just slow. Besides, I don't want to just write something quickly and post it just for the sake of posting it. I am sure you understand that.**

**Finally , I hope you enjoyed reading this chapter. **

**I would also like to thank everyone who has reviewed or sent me a PM. It really is nice to know that, even though the updates are (terribly) slow, some of you aren't yet tired of me and Amelia. **

**Thanks for reading.**

**I will try to update the next chapter sometime during the next two weeks. **


	48. The Road Goes Ever On

**Everything belongs to JRRTolkien except for my OC and weird parts of the plot.  
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><p>The following days I more or less avoided Bilbo.<p>

I really liked the hobbit, he was a kind man, but I didn't feel like we were going to agree on the dwarves any time soon. The dwarves were my friends and I cared about them. Clearly Bilbo had another opinion altogether. My own feelings and thoughts about the dwarves were influenced by my past with them. I knew it. But knowing that didn't change any of those thoughts or feelings.

I had escaped from my training, well, Dwalin had agreed to let me rest a bit.

Instead of going to the library and risk facing Bilbo, I had chosen to be a coward once again and was now lying on the wooden bench that was hidden under the weeping willow. A soft wind was making the branches shift lazily. My eyes were closed and I just let my thoughts drift away.

I was both happy and sad as Nori invaded my mind. I hadn't been able to be alone with him in awhile. Sleeping next to him was soothing me incredibly, but each night was plagued with nightmares. With the intense training, I was just too tired to stay awake at night. The little promise between me and Nori seemed completely stupid and pointless. It made me hurt to be close to him, yet unable to be honest and true to my feelings.

I sighed.

Well, there was nothing I could do anyway.

I startled as I felt something against my cheek.

I almost fell from the bench, and would have actually, if it hadn't been for Nori who caught me.

I blinked. I couldn't believe he was actually here. And the bastard was clearly chuckling at the results of his little joke. I slapped his shoulder and only made him laugh softly some more.

"You really have terrible reflexes." He teased me.

I was still lying on the bench and he was sitting on the ground. His left arm was still on my waist, as he had prevented my fall by grabbing me.

I quirked an eyebrow at him and didn't say a word. My heart was beating a bit faster just because Nori was there. I turned my head the other way and huffed in annoyance. Well, at least I was hoping he would read it as annoyance.

"Oy, don't be like that." He said, poking my cheek lightly.

I shrugged, which was weird as I was still lying. Stubbornly, I kept my gaze away. I had to bit the inside of my cheeks to prevent myself from smiling.

"Mizimul, won't you look at me?" He whispered and I could tell he had moved because his voice seemed to be closer.

I turned my back to him, mostly to hide a small smirk that I just couldn't stop.

"Umzam." He was still holding my waist, but his lips had just grazed the skin of my ear and I shivered.

I had to bit my lip to avoid smiling. I had just found out that I liked to tease Nori this way, because clearly it made him really sweet and tender.

"Sanmizim, look at me." He said just before his lips touched the skin just below my ear.

I squeaked and startled but once more his arm secured me to the bench. Then I could only guess it was his way of punishing me for my stubbornness, he peppered my neck with kisses, tickling me and sending shivers down my spine. Well, I wasn't going to complain. I started to chuckle lightly while Nori kept pecking on my throat and jaw.

"Stop it," I laughed at some point. "I'll look at you, cheeky thief." I wasn't ashamed of giving up.

"You sure you won't look away anymore." He teased me between kisses.

"I won't, I swear." I laughed.

His hold on my waist weakened and I shifted, turning to lie on my back once again. As soon as we looked at each other, he leant and kissed me lightly.

"Hey there." I whispered against his lips.

"Hello." He replied with a smile.

"Did it take you long to find me here?" I wondered, slightly apologetic to have hidden so far from the others.

His right hand was now on my shoulder and I placed my right hand on it. Absentmindedly I started to draw circles on his skin. With his left hand he brushed a strand of hair away from my forehead. I could tell he was looking at the braid on my left temple, and my thoughts were confirmed when he took one of the beads in between his fingers. He was frowning a bit as he looked at the stone beads that represented my guardians.

"Nah." He finally answered. "I guessed you'd be here if you weren't with your new little friend." He shrugged, still looking at the stones. "Why aren't you with him by the way?"

"I needed to get away a bit, I guess." I sighed and closed my eyes.

Just feeling his presence near me was enough to make me feel better. Wasn't it the strangest thing? It sounded terribly cheesy and sickly sweet, but it was still the truth. I felt better when he was close. I didn't have to ponder on that though, Nori interrupted my thoughts.

"Amelia, are you alright?" He was serious now and I could see concern in his eyes.

"I am. It's just," I sighed and brought my hand to his cheek. "Nori, what do you think is going to happen?"

I wasn't truly certain myself what I was asking. I wasn't sure whether I was talking about the quest. His gaze grew unfocused for a short while and his expression turned rather sad. He squeezed my waist a bit and finally shook his head before he whispered softly.

"I don't know Amelia. I wish I did, but..." He didn't finish and silence fell between us.

After that I decided to sit on the bench. Tugging on Nori's hand, I wordlessly asked him to sit next to me. He embraced me tenderly as we remained silent. Neither of us could possibly know what awaited us. No one could tell what our future would be like. I encircled Nori's waist with my arms and hid my face against his chest. This wasn't the most comfortable position to be in while sitting on a bench, but well, it made me feel better.

I felt him place one hand on the top of my head while the other was holding my forearm.

"Nori?"

He hummed and I closed my eyes, listening to his heartbeat for a few seconds.

"Nori, the runes written on the necklace you gave me, what do they mean?"

I looked up after a while and I saw him smirk cheekily.

"Now, now Mizimul. Let this be a motivation for you to learn Khuzdul." His smirk grew smugger as he winked at me.

"You..." I couldn't find words to retort wittily. "You do know I'll find a way to get back at you."

"I'm counting on it Mizimul..."

* * *

><p>Later that evening I was trying my best to pronounce a list of Khuzdul words that Bofur was trying to teach me. Each new word seemed more difficult for me than the precedents. It was a tiring process to learn a new language, I genuinely believed that Khuzdul was more complicated than most foreign languages I ever tried to learn before. The guttural pronunciation was especially hard for me to get right.<p>

Still, I knew what an honour it was for me to be allowed to learn it, so I did my best.

"Memul goraz" I slowly pronounced before continuing the list that Bofur tried to make me memorize. "Nanun goraz, pa, no, banud goraz, khe… khezum goraz..." I breathed out before tilting my head, looking at my friend. "What does it all mean?" I asked him.

"You should go recite it all to Dori, he'll be mighty pleased."

I probably should have been suspicious of the cheeky light that shone brightly in his eyes. At that moment though, I didn't think anything of it. Shrugging I stood back up, leaving Bofur behind me before walking to the small group of dwarves where Dori was.

My guardian was sitting with Balin, Gloin, Oin, Dwalin and Thorin. They stopped their discussion as I came closer and I swallowed thickly, slightly embarrassed without any real reason to feel this way. I cleared my throat and looked at all these dwarves. They were clearly waiting for me to speak so I took a quick breath and cleared my throat.

"Bofur taught me some Khuzdul and he said I should tell you." I blushed slightly while Dori smiled kindly. "I don't... I don't know what it means though."

"Go on, my dear, show us how you have progressed." Balin kindly gestured for me to speak.

I took a deep breath and forgetting everything about my embarrassment I listed all the new words Bofur had taught me.

"Memul goraz, nanun goraz, banud goraz, khezum goraz." I tried to get them out as fast as possible.

There was a short eerie silence before Gloin and Dwalin started to chuckle. From the noise behind me I could tell that Bofur was probably rolling on the floor right now. Balin blinked and Dori glared at someone behind me, most likely Bofur.

I groaned and hid my eyes behind my hand.

"Alright, what did he just teach me?" I sighed.

"Nothing bad my dear. You just recited several types of ale." Balin smiled kindly at me. "It isn't really necessary or useful for you to know, not at this stage at least."

I sighed. Only Bofur would waste everyone's time teaching me useless words when I struggled so much to just learn the basics of their unfriendly language.

"Your pronunciation is getting better Amelia." Dori praised me and it cheered me up tremendously.

"Just be careful not to listen to Bofur too much." Balin added.

"Aye, he'll keep on teaching you useless things." Dori agreed and I nodded, letting them know I understood perfectly.

I nodded and quickly glanced over my shoulder to glare at a still laughing Bofur. My glare only made him laugh more and I rolled my eyes in annoyance. He truly was an annoying person, and he was lucky he was such a good friend. It wasn't the joke itself that annoyed me, it hadn't harmed anyone after all. No. What was annoying was the fact that I really tried my best to learn Khuzdul and I didn't like my efforts to be wasted on such things. Of course living with dwarves I would probably have learned those words at some point, but right now I had other priorities.

Making up my mind I strode toward Bofur who laughed some more at seeing my reaction.

I stepped over bags and bedrolls, turned around the fire and stopped in front of Bofur. Seeing my anger, his laugh only became louder. I rolled my eyes and crouched before grabbing my water skin. In one swift and quick move I emptied it on Bofur's face. It brought back flashes of memories and I couldn't stop a smirk from growing on my lips.

Bofur spluttered and stopped to laugh. Then he looked at me in surprise.

"Oy lass…" The chuckle was clearly audible in his voice.

"Your face was red, I thought you needed a refreshment." I said with a shrug and a smirk.

He was about to retort when the door opened. We both turned our heads to look at the newcomer. It wasn't difficult to recognize this person, even though I could barely remember meeting him. He was old, that much was obvious. He had long grey hair and a long grey beard. His beard was nothing like the magnificent ones adorned by the dwarves though. Grey seemed to be the best colour to describe him. He was wearing some strange clothes. I could best describe them as a robe and a long grey cape.

I knew who he was, or who he was supposed to be at least.

He was the man called Gandalf.

Oddly enough, as soon as he came in his eyes found mine and he observed me for a second without saying anything.

"Tharkûn, what do you want tonight?" Thorin groaned.

I quirked an eyebrow, unsure of how this man was called now. The man, Gandalf or Tharkûn, glanced at Thorin and nodded in his direction.

"I came to meet the newest addition to this quest. I wish to speak with her."

His voice was grave yet it reminded me of the voice of a grandfather. There was no malice in it. He seemed to be the kind of persons used to be listened to. I observed him unashamedly and, seeing as his eyes hadn't left me, I could tell he was doing the same.

"What do you want with Amelia?" Dori immediately replied.

"Nothing master Dori. As I said, I just wish to speak with her."

I frowned but then I shrugged. I couldn't imagine this man would attack me or hurt me in any way.

"Alright." I simply said before I walked towards him.

As I moved closer I realized once again how short I was compared to normal people. Living with the dwarves, I tended to forget that I was shorter than the norm. I was and had always been incredibly short for a human. But I was rather tall compared to the dwarves' standards. I could see eye to eye with Nori after all and wasn't that short compared to Dwalin and Thorin. But next to the grey man I felt, well, like a dwarf.

I craned my neck to look at his face while he looked down at me.

"I am known as Gandalf," He said with a smile. "Gandalf the Grey." He added.

"I'm Amelia." I replied simply.

He nodded and gestured for me to follow him. He turned away and, without looking behind him to ascertain I was following him, he strode outside. I quickly glanced over my shoulder and immediately looked at Dori. He nodded and I shot him a quick smile before I followed Gandalf.

We walked in silence in the long corridors. They still held their magic on me and my gaze was turned towards the gardens and statues. Then Gandalf turned several times into corridors I hadn't used and we ended up in front of tall wooden doors. He pushed them and entered the new room without breaking his stride and I quickly followed.

The room was circular with small pillars going up to the ceiling. Vines grew around those columns and all in all the structure was just as magnificent as any I had seen so far in this place. In the centre of the room, there were three chairs and in one of them sat an elf with long black hair. I immediately recognized the Lord Elrond. I couldn't forget him. He was a memorable person.

I didn't hesitate to follow Gandalf to the chairs and sat in the one he pointed at me.

I sat and looked at Gandalf, wondering what was about to happen.

I didn't have to wait for long as the old man spoke almost as soon as he sat.

"Well, Amelia, would you mind telling me how you came to live with the dwarves?" He asked with a kind tone.

I felt a bit uneasy speaking about it. I had no idea why, but it was weird for me to think back about the events that had brought me in their care. It was around two years ago, but it might as well have been decades.

The two men waited patiently while I cleared my throat and shrugged.

"Dori, Nori and Ori found me when I was injured. I knew no one, and they were the first people I met. They decided to help me and I followed them back to the Halls. There Thorin allowed me to stay and I became Dori's and Balin's ward."

I spoke calmly, though a bit fast. They didn't react at all at first and both kept looking at me with a strange light in their eyes. I shifted awkwardly on my seat and tried to look around. My gaze fell on rows upon rows of shelves full of books and scrolls. I wondered for a second whether this place was a part of the library. Looking at the desk with ink, feathers and parchments on it, I thought this might actually be a study.

"Where do you come from?" Gandalf's voice forced my eyes to turn back in their direction.

"A country far away." I replied automatically.

Lord Elrond crossed his hands and stared at me oddly. Gandalf was slowly stroking his beard and seemed to be deep in thought. They glanced at each other and started to speak in a language I didn't know. From the way it sounded I guessed it was closer to the elvish language than the dwarvish one. They acted as if I wasn't there and it was starting to annoy me but there truly was nothing I felt I could do then.

Finally Lord Elrond looked back at me and spoke.

"Where you born here, in this world?"

I inhaled quickly in shock. I was a bit startled they would ask such a question. The dwarves hadn't known anything about my world. They had no idea before they met me that there was another world. I had no idea either. How could those two men just come up with such a question after a five minutes discussion together?

"Amelia, it is alright. You can talk to us." Gandalf leant forward and patted my knee in a kind and comforting manner.

"I, erm." I had no idea what to say.

"From your reaction I'm guessing you were born somewhere else then." Lord Elrond said without blinking.

"This hasn't happened in a while." Gandalf muttered with a deep frown.

I looked from one to the other, eyes wide and if I were entirely honest, I would admit to be slightly scared right then. I knew that Lord Elrond was different. He was an elf. I was starting to believe that this was more than a random name used to describe a race of tall and handsome people. There clearly was something else to it. And this man, this Gandalf, I could remember being told he was a wizard. Could it be…?

"Amelia, how did you arrive here? Can you tell us?"

I looked at the old man and shook my head. Taking a deep breath I gathered all my courage and squared my shoulders.

"I don't really know. I was visiting a cave and I got lost. I walked for awhile and ended up getting out at the side of a mountain here. I fell, lost consciousness and that's how Dori, Nori and Ori found me." It really was weird to retell those events.

"You were visiting a cave?" Lord Elrond quirked an eyebrow, as if it was the weirdest thing to do.

"Well, yeah." I shrugged once again. "This particular cave was rather famous for its beauty."

"And you heard nothing, saw nothing or no one?" Gandalf asked, leaning a bit more forward.

"No." I replied before contradicting myself. "Yes. Well, just some light, but it was far away and might as well have been my imagination." An odd feeling of uneasiness was making my voice slightly croaky.

I cleared my throat several times while the two men glanced yet again at each other. I saw Lord Elrond quirk an eyebrow and Gandalf shook his head ever so slightly. Maybe if I hadn't been so used to look for small movements in Nori, I would have missed those. But I was used to almost imperceptible gestures and thus saw it all.

"How do you know of my world?" I finally managed to ask, bringing their attention back to me.

"We don't. Not really." Lord Elrond replied as calmly as if he was talking about the weather and not the possibility of an alternate world. "But, to my knowledge, it happened once already."

I straightened at his words. Was there someone else? Someone like me? Someone who would understand me without having to spend hours explaining what I meant or what I wanted to say. Already my brain was projecting images of me and that yet unknown person talking easily together. Remembering our world, what we missed and what we discovered here. Maybe this person would have arrived through another way.

I could see it already.

I could see how such a companionship would make me feel so much better.

I loved it here and loved the dwarves. That was a given. But my previous world was still a part of me. It was still in me. To be able to meet with someone from my world would soothe a part of me that I hadn't known suffered. It was thrilling to imagine it.

I had made peace with myself. I knew I probably would never see my world ever again and it was alright. It was alright because I wasn't alone anymore. I had a life here too. I wasn't lost. So it was perfectly alright never to go back. But still, I couldn't explain the sheer happiness I felt at the simple thought of meeting someone from my world, of reconnecting with it through this person.

I quickly looked up, realizing only then that I had been completely lost in my thoughts.

"Where is he? Or she? Can I meet him, her?" I knew my eyes had to look horribly wide right then.

There was a short silence before Gandalf replied.

"Unfortunately you can't." He leant forward a bit as he said that, his eyes apologetic.

"What? Why? I could meet him, or her, after we complete this quest." I frowned deeply, unable to fathom why I couldn't meet this person.

"Miss Amelia, the man that arrived here died shortly after." Lord Elrond calmly stated.

Immediately the images my brain had provided shattered. I felt terribly sad suddenly. The uneasy feeling kept growing in my chest.

"Ho, how?" I managed to articulate weakly. "How did he arrive here?" It honestly wasn't the question I wanted to ask, but I couldn't ask the right one yet.

"He said he got lost in a forest in his world and fell through some unstable ground into a small, natural cave. When he managed to get out he was still in a similar forest, though this forest was in our world. We found him a few days later." Lord Elrond explained in a detached way.

I felt sad for this unknown man who had died here, far away from our home.

"How did he…?" I couldn't bring myself to speak the words.

"He tried to find back the cave against our advice. He was found dead not too long after that. He either starved or died from an animal attack." Lord Elrond's tone was completely even and such a lack of expression made me uncomfortable.

Trying to put aside the sadness I felt for this person I hadn't known existed ten minutes ago, I let the more pragmatic part of my brain work.

"Is there one? A way back I mean."

I held my breath as I waited for the answer. I couldn't explain how I felt right then even if I wanted to. There was a strange mixture of hope, dread, fear and something else that whirled in me like a storm.

"No."

One word.

One stupid word crushed whatever hope I might have had.

I felt my whole body freeze.

"At least, there's no way that we know of." Gandalf agreed, but I wasn't truly listening anymore.

The word pronounced with finality by Lord Elrond kept ringing in my head.

I had known for a long time now that I probably wouldn't ever see my family, my world again. I had known. I had even mourned them. I was so certain I would never go back. But the knowledge that this possibility was actually a certain fact was something else entirely.

There was no way I would ever go back to my previous world.

Then a thought crossed my mind. More than a thought it was a feeling, an urge. Wordlessly I stood up, bowed slightly and heard my voice as my mouth started to work on its own.

"Is there anything you wanted to tell me or can I go back now?"

"Miss Amelia, I wanted to tell you that you shouldn't feel obliged to follow the dwarves on their quest. If you so wish, you can wait for them here. You are welcome in my home."

"Thank you Lord Elrond, but following the dwarves is my wish." I replied before bowing again.

I then let my feet bring me back to the dwarves' balcony.

Strangely enough, I couldn't find my way if I wanted to, but my feet seemed to know it better than my brain could ever hope to.

I pushed the door open and stepped in.

The dwarves were talking loudly. They were laughing. They were drinking, eating and smoking. They were themselves. None of them had spotted me yet as I walked in completely. It was Ori who realized I was there first.

"Amelia!" He exclaimed joyously before his tone changed completely. "What happened?"

Immediately there was a heavy silence that fell on the balcony. I didn't answer and just walked towards the fire. I simply sat between Bifur and Bombur and looked in the flames. What could I say? Did something actually happen? I wasn't too sure. I wasn't even sure about how I felt right now. Was I sad? Maybe a little. Was I hurt? Maybe? Did I care? Apparently…

After turning and turning those questions in my mind endlessly I realized that I felt oddly numb actually. It was as if a part of me had somehow died. A part of me that I didn't really realize existed had come to life earlier only to be killed on the spot. It was hard. Knowledge hurt.

I looked up to see that the dwarves were now all gathered around the fire and some of them were clearly asking me what was going on.

I sighed and rubbed my forehead tiredly.

"I spoke with Gandalf and Lord Elrond." I said and immediately all the dwarves turned completely silent. "Apparently someone else from my world appeared here. He died. There's no way back." Was there anything else to say? No. Not really.

The silence grew around us until I heard someone clear his throat. I looked up to see that Thorin was standing right next to me now.

"Come." He ordered me before turning away.

If it weren't for Bifur and Bombur pushing me to my feet, I would probably have been too surprised to do anything. I staggered a bit on my feet before finding my balance and following him outside again. He glanced over his shoulder to make sure I was behind him. We walked a bit in silence before he cleared his throat.

"Amelia, you are already welcome within our Halls."

"I know that, and I can't thank you enough." I softly whispered. "If it weren't for you, I'd probably be dead too." I lowered my gaze to the ground.

"Amelia, you may not be a dwarf, but I understand how it feels to have your home stolen from you. I can't help you find your way back, but I can offer you a true home." He said gravely as we stopped.

I looked up in his eyes. He was frowning, as he usually did. Yet his eyes weren't glaring or icy cold for once. This time I could see some warmth behind the ice. It wasn't pity either, Thorin wouldn't feel pity for me and I was glad for that too.

"Once we reclaim Erebor, and if you so wish, I'll see to it that you are adopted into one of our families. Dori will probably be the best choice. The brothers would become yours rightfully then and you'll forever be one of us. You'll be able to claim Dori's ancestors as your own and will receive a family bead."

I blinked.

What?

I wasn't sure I understood what was going on right then.

The King wanted me to be adopted by Dori? What? What was I supposed to say? How was I supposed to answer?

"I'm not sure…I don't know what to say." I stammered.

Thorin nodded and placed a hand over my shoulder.

"I want you to know that, no matter what happens, you have a home. Now. There's no need to rush. We'll discuss this further after we retake Erebor."

After those words, Thorin just left. I followed him even though my brain was completely disconnected. I was on autopilot. It wasn't bad per se but it wasn't really a good thing either. The evening passed in a blur. I was awake but my brain was as good as asleep. I awoke from this strange state when I felt a large and warm hand on my shoulder and Nori popped in front of me.

"Are you alright?"

I blinked and looked around. All the dwarves were asleep and I realized that I was lying on my bunk with my eyes wide open. I looked up at Nori and shook my head slightly. In a swift move he helped me stand and I let him. I didn't even try to fight it. After a short while we were back in the small garden with a pond in its centre.

I looked around.

There were several bushes with flowers on them around us. The ground around the fountain was paved and there was a small paved path that we followed but the rest was soft, green grass that appeared grey in the moonlight.

Nori sat on the small edge around the fountain and I sat next to him.

He didn't say a word, he didn't need to. He knew that I would talk to him. It was only a matter of minutes and Nori was a very patient dwarf. When I felt that my thoughts were a bit more organized, I turned to look at him.

"Thorin wants me to be adopted."

Nori blinked and then I saw one of his braided eyebrow rose up to his hairline.

"Is that the reason why you were completely out of it tonight?" He asked kindly while he took my hands in his and intertwined our fingers.

"Yes." I sighed. "It's part of it I think." I let my head fall on his shoulder and sighed again.

"Amelia, I don't understand. Why don't you want to be a part of our family?" His voice was so sad as he spoke that I had to look up at him.

"Nori, it's not that. Think about it. If Dori adopts me what does it make me?"

"A part of our family." He replied instantly before he opened his mouth again and froze on the spot.

"Yep. It makes me your sister." I nodded, knowing he finally understood.

"Right." He frowned deeply.

A few minutes passed in silence. I looked at our hands and was deep in thoughts. The fact was, if I were to be adopted, and if I had correctly understood Thorin, it would make me in all intent and purpose Nori's sister. Blood would be forgotten. I would claim his ancestors as mine. That wouldn't do. It was one of my nightmares becoming real.

"Did he say when he wanted this to happen?" Nori's soft whisper tore me away from my thoughts.

"After we retake Erebor."

"Then we'll think about it when we'll have to." Nori squeezed my hands lightly and leant to kiss my brow. "Don't worry Mizimul, we'll find a way."

He embraced me tightly and I ended up on his lap. My nose was hidden in the nook of his neck. I felt so safe here, in his arms, against his chest.

"Mizimul?"

I hummed lightly as I closed my eyes.

"How do you feel about your world?" His voice was barely above a murmur and I could tell that he was hesitant about saying this.

I opened my eyes but I could only see Nori's skin and his beard. It was oddly comforting. I smiled and didn't think twice before I leant forward and kissed Nori's throat, just there, below his beard. As my lips touched his skin he jolted.

"Mah…" He yelped.

One second I was warm and happy against Nori's chest. The next I was completely shocked on the ground. Looking up to the place where we were sitting just a second ago I realized that Nori wasn't there anymore. At the same time I heard him swear loudly in Khuzdul. Quickly going back up on my feet I couldn't help but have a fit of laughter when I finally saw him. He was completely dishevelled and looked like a drown rat in the middle of the pond. I felt tears roll down my cheeks while I clutched my stomach with my hands.

How long had it been since the last time I laughed so much?

It felt so good.

It felt so relieving.

At some point I was gasping for air. Meanwhile Nori was grumbling as he finally got out of the pond. He was soaked and a puddle was almost instantly forming under his feet. Little by little my laugh calmed down to soft chuckles.

Nori still hadn't said a word. He was standing there, his arms crossed over his chest, looking at me. I couldn't see his face properly. I could only hope he wasn't too angry. As I took a deep, calming breath, he stepped forward and cupped my cheek with his cold hand.

Our eyes met but I didn't have the time to say a word or react in any way before I felt his lips on mine.

The moment was sweet and tender and overall too short.

"It's good to hear your laugh." He murmured as he pressed our foreheads together.

"I'm sorry." I whispered in a chuckle.

"You know I'll find a way to get back at you for this." His smirk grew cheeky and I felt myself smile some more at hearing my words thrown back at me.

"I'm counting on it." I replied in the same way he had.

He was kind enough not to hold me then, but we stayed some more in the garden. Clearly Nori didn't seem bothered more than that by the state of his clothes. At some point though, after I yawned for the umpteenth time, he insisted on going back to the balcony.

We shared one last kiss before he opened the door for me. As I turned a questioning glance at him, he pushed me in and closed the door behind me. I frowned, standing there for a moment. Then I realized that as wet as he was, he couldn't really go back in. The others would notice if there were puddles of water everywhere. I had no idea where Nori spent the rest of that night. It was a bit odd not to know, but it was nothing new.

Thankfully I didn't suffer from any other nightmares.

* * *

><p>The following days seemed to pass in a blur with nothing really specific happening. And finally the time came for me to spar against a dwarf of Thorin's company under the watchful eyes of all the other dwarves. I had no idea who was going to spar against me. I just knew that I had to win. I was nervously standing on the side of the large training ground, waiting for Thorin to decide. I was a bundle of nerves. This was important. I couldn't afford to lose. I had no idea what would happen if I did.<p>

I startled when I felt a hand on my arm.

Looking over my shoulder I saw Nori.

"Now?" I squeaked.

He nodded and observed me for a second.

"You'll be fine." He finally whispered, offering me one of his small smiles. "Just remember one thing."

"What?" I asked as my grip on my staff tightened.

"You're not a warrior Mizimul." Nori's voice was so low that no one around, not even an elf, could have heard. "Don't try to fight like one."

After those words, he spun me around and pushed me forward in the direction of the other dwarves. I took a deep breath as I walked and stopped a few steps away from Thorin. He looked at me calmly and gestured to his side.

I had expected to fight against Dwalin or Bifur, Gloin eventually, but I had to admit that Thorin's choice came as a terrible surprise.

"Dori?" I blurted out.

"Yes." Thorin said with a nod. "You know too well how Dwalin, Bifur and Gloin fight. And I can't trust Fili to fight you with all his strength. Now, defeat Dori and there will be no further discussion about your abilities."

I blinked and looked dumbfounded at my guardian. My sweet Dori looked murderous and I had to swallow back a large lump forming in my throat. Taking a deep breath I followed my beloved guardian to the centre of the ground.

"Give it your best Amelia, I won't go easy on you." He told me before we started.

I nodded and not even a few seconds later Dori jumped forward, weapons ready to strike. From that moment on, time seemed to stop. My whole being was focused on the fight. Dori was being serious. Each time our weapons would hit, I felt the shock resonate in my bones. All too soon I was forced to walk back, unable to do anything against such a trained warrior when he was being serious.

It felt as if he was playing. I couldn't do anything except jump and use my staff to avoid his blades. Long minutes passed. Thankfully I had more endurance now than I had, because it was the only positive point right now. I was still 'alive' and 'uninjured' in this spar, but I knew it wouldn't last forever. Especially as Dori's attack just kept becoming faster and stronger. Meanwhile it was starting to be harder for me to jump and pare his strikes.

Then it struck me.

Nori had given me just one advice.

He had known I would fight Dori. He knew perfectly well that there was no way I could possibly win. Unless…

Unless I fought dirty.

Dori was too strong, too fast, too experienced for me to fight against him.

In a second I took a decision.

Instead of following the same pattern I had until now; jumping back and paring with my staff, I waited for Dori's next attack. As his right sword came toward me I let myself fall on one knee and changed my hold on my staff. Throwing it like a spear in front of me, aiming between Dori's legs. I felt that his sword had barely missed my head and I could see that he was about to jump away from my staff.

I jumped forward too while still holding my weapon that swiped Dori's left feet, destabilizing him. I was on my knees next to him and had just a second to react.

Letting go of my staff I grabbed one of my training daggers and hit Dori behind the knee, then only I rolled away from him.

There was a short pause in the fight.

"You're wounded Dori." I heard Bofur's cheerful voice sing song.

Rules were rather strict. Now that he was wounded in such a place, Dori was obliged to act as if this injury was hindering his moves. In all truth, it probably would if it had been real. I didn't wait for Dori to reply and charged.

I could already hear Dwalin's disappointed comment as Dori prepared to easily strike me. But before I could stupidly 'impale' myself on his wooden swords I once again let myself fall to the floor and used my free hand to grab a handful of sand. Without hesitation I threw it in Dori's face.

The dwarf sputtered and staggered back while I got back on my feet. I winced as I felt one of his elbows painfully hit me in the side and couldn't avoid one of the blades as it hit my arm. Still I pushed forward and used Dori's inattention to sidestep and place both wooden blades on his neck.

There was an odd silence around.

I was breathing rather heavily and could only notice that Dori seemed completely fine. Well, except that he had now let his swords fall to the ground and was trying to rub his face. Immediately I let go of my weapon and grabbed his wrists.

"Stop. I'll take care of that." I said quickly before whispering more softly. "Sorry."

"Well." Thorin's voice made me jolt slightly and I turned to face him. "That wasn't perfect. You're no warrior material. But that'll do for now."

After those words, he turned away. I blinked at his back but didn't have the time to say a word before Dwalin, Gloin and Bifur all started to comment every move I had made. Soon, all the other dwarves were talking and arguing. I couldn't care less. Meanwhile I tugged on Dori's arms. His eyes were still closed as he followed me, grumbling slightly about the tactics I used.

I helped him sit on a bench and ordered him not to touch his eyes. Quickly I grabbed some clean cloth and a bucket full of clear water and went back to him. I knelt in front of my guardian and softly started to wash the sand stuck on his face. I was being particularly cautious when it came to his eyes.

"Are you alright?" I whispered.

"I'll be fine Amelia." He reassured me, but I knew he wasn't happy with me. "Why did you do that?"

"There was no way I could have won otherwise. I had to win Dori." I replied kindly.

"You're behaving like" He stopped for a second before he finished in a slightly angrier tone. "Like Nori would."

I frowned and looked at Dori. I didn't know how to read his expression. I realized then that I knew him really well, but probably not nearly as well as I did Nori. I seemed to be able to guess or feel what Nori was thinking. I couldn't do that with Dori. It was strange.

"If it helps me survive, does it matter how I behave?" I finally commented.

Dori kept silent for several minutes. His eyes were red as I finished removing the sand that was still stuck on his eyebrows.

"I guess it doesn't." His tone though seemed to contradict his words a bit.

Neither of us moved or talked for the next minutes. I was still kneeling next to his legs and as I looked up a bit I saw the sand stuck in his intricately braided beard. I hesitated for a moment and bit my lower lip.

"Dori." I softly called and waited for his eyes to meet mine. "Can I help remove the sand from your beard?"

He knew that I didn't ask this randomly. I could see in his eyes that he understood what I was telling him. I trusted him. He was my family. He was more to me than a simple guardian. I wanted, I truly wanted, to be a part of their family. Hadn't I been in love with Nori, Thorin's idea would have overjoyed me. From my understanding, if Dori accepted now then it would mean to all dwarves that Dori and I were kin and family. Of course, everyone knew it…sort of. But this was symbolic. It had been the same when Dori had once asked me whether or not he could brush my hair for me. It had taken me quite some time to realize it, but I was stunned to find out that I had never done anything similar. It was as if the dwarves had accepted me as one of their own, but I had never told them in their words that I felt the same. I had never proven my feelings through simple gestures.

Dori looked into my eyes and I saw some moisture shine on the corner of his eyes. I couldn't tell whether it was because of emotion or the results of the sand. He didn't say a word but nodded.

I gingerly started to remove the sand from the braids, trying my best not to loosen the tightly braided locks.

I hadn't paid attention to the others, but I saw from the corner of my eye that someone was nearby. I chose to ignore it.

"Some day, you'll have to show me how to braid hairs." I told Dori with a smile.

"There's no avoiding it." I heard Ori reply in my back. "Any good dwarf should know how to braid hairs."

"Yes, we'll teach you." Dori agreed with a genuine smile that warmed my heart.

After this small exchange, and once I stood back up after having finished my task, I realized that most of the other dwarves were back to their own trainings. Balin, Dwalin, Ori and Oin had gathered around me and Dori though.

"That wasn't too bad." Dwalin grunted. "But you got hurt stupidly."

"She did well, brother. She held her own." Balin immediately took my defense.

"Getting hurt stupidly won't help her survive in a real battle." The bald warrior insisted.

"But in a real battle, she won't be alone." Ori cut in.

"Who knows?" Dwalin grunted before he shrugged and left to join the others.

We remained silent for a short while. I was now sitting next to Dori. I was looking at my hands, frowning. I hadn't really been in a battle yet. Sure I had seen some fights, but could they be called battle? I doubted Dwalin would.

"Don't worry Amelia." Balin patted my shoulder and sat on my left side. "Don't listen to Dwalin. You did well. You surprised us."

"And you won't be alone if we end up in a battle. We'll be there." Dori added. "But if we end up in a battle, use every trick you can think of. Our enemies would do the same."

I looked at him then. He was clearly bothered by something. He had been since I met with them and somehow I doubted that it was only my fault. I wanted to talk with him, ask him what was wrong, but something seemed to prevent me from doing so. It was a hunch maybe, but I knew that Dori wouldn't talk with me. He would brush it off, as always, or maybe I simply wouldn't like what he might have to say. I couldn't tell where it came from, but I could hear in my head this voice telling me that right now I shouldn't ask Dori. I should just wait.

Wordlessly Dori patted my knee before he stood up and left me with Balin, Ori and Oin. I glanced at Balin who was frowning until he saw I was looking at him. He shook his head and smiled at me. Clearly the old dwarf knew me well because, before I could even say anything, he smiled at me and spoke.

"Don't worry Amelia. Everything is as fine as could be. How are your studies going? I haven't seen you in the company of our hobbit recently."

We both knew that he was trying to change topics. I let him do it though, because I knew there was no point in trying to get words out of him. If Balin didn't want to talk, Balin wouldn't talk.

I shrugged and thought about my answer.

"I haven't really talked with mister Baggins recently. I managed to take quite a lot of notes though. I hope I won't need them." I sighed and rubbed my forehead. "When do we leave?"

"I'm not sure. Thorin should be able to find out what's on our map tonight. Then he will decide." Balin replied.

"We'll probably leave soon." Oin grumbled while he prepared his pipe.

"Aye." Balin nodded. "You should make sure you have everything you might need in your backpack." He then said to me. "I don't think that Thorin will want to stay for long once we have the information we need."

"Right." I sighed.

I let my back press against the wall behind me as my eyes looked up to the sky. The days spent here had been strange. I couldn't really explain how or why, but it felt almost as if we had lived in a bubble completely disconnected from the rest of the world. The dwarves had behaved as they usually did, so there was nothing different there. Maybe it was the place itself. Here, time seemed to stop. I had been able to get closer to Nori even though there really were a lot of other things we had to think about. I had been able to train and read, while I technically was on a quest. It felt as if someone had paused our lives while we were there. I didn't know how to feel about that.

I knew that as soon as we would be on the road again, I wouldn't be able to even think about Nori. I would have to be entirely focused on this quest and my personal feelings for one of the dwarves were far less important than what we were doing. Besides, if I wasn't focused, I might end up dead. Or worse, someone might died while I was busy daydreaming.

No.

I wouldn't let that happen.

As soon as we were back on the road, my feelings for Nori would have to be pushed to the back of my mind and heart.

Balin's voice brought me out of my thoughts.

"Well, my dear. I think that's it for today. You can go keep company to mister Baggins if you want."

I tilted my head slightly and frowned a bit.

"Balin, why did you hire him?" I had been asking myself this question for awhile now.

Nori was a thief, everyone knew that, so why would they bother hire someone who didn't want to follow them? I knew that every time they had given me answers, those answers felt odd, as if even the dwarves didn't truly believe them.

I trusted Balin to be honest with me though.

He took his time to answer, pouting slightly and frowning before he finally glanced at me and smiled.

"Well, master Gandalf thought it was necessary."

I blinked.

It was the first time I heard this reason. This old man was so influent that he managed to force the dwarves into hiring someone they didn't want to take with them?

"Who is this Gandalf? I heard that he was called a wizard several times. What does that mean?"

"You don't have wizards in your world?" Ori asked, reminding us of his presence near us.

"No. I mean, we have people who call themselves magicians but they only use tricks." I shrugged.

My answer seemed to surprise my friends a bit, but soon enough Balin replied.

"Well, Gandalf is a wizard. He knows things and when he says that we will need a hobbit, and that this hobbit is a burglar, we believe him."

"Is he human?" I wondered aloud. "Gandalf I mean. He looks really old, too old to follow you all if he's human."

"He's a wizard Amelia. He's old alright, probably older than all of us, but he isn't human."

I nodded and the discussion ended there. I couldn't lie and say that I understood what he meant. His words were clear, of course, but how could I possibly know what a wizard was? It was all too odd for me. I didn't believe in magic, which was probably weird as I was living in another world where dwarves and hobbits existed. Maybe I should try and rethink my beliefs.

As I was about to leave though, another thought crossed my mind and I looked at my old guardian.

"Balin" I called him as he wasn't paying attention to me at the time.

"Yes my dear?"

"What's going to happen to Thorin's Halls? I mean, if this quest is successful and we manage to reclaim Erebor, what will happen then?"

There was a long moment of silence then. Clearly they either hadn't thought this through or worse, they didn't think they'd be able to retake their homeland.

"The doors will be closed and the people will move here." The old dwarf finally replied.

"You'll abandon the Halls?" I couldn't help but be surprised, and sad, at those words.

"We don't have a population large enough for two Halls. Erebor is much bigger than the Halls." Balin explained but I could tell that he was feeling sad too.

"There are other settlements, dwarves who didn't follow the group in the Blue Mountains, they will probably go back to Erebor if the mountain is ours again." Ori explained.

"Why didn't they go to the Halls?" I wondered aloud, surprised to hear that there might be some other similar halls elsewhere.

"After the battle of Azanulbizar, dwarves scattered everywhere. Most followed Thorin, but some chose not to. They went south, to the men's kingdoms, to try and find work there." Oin was the one to speak this time.

"Will Thorin accept them back?" I couldn't help but ask.

Loyalty was very important for dwarves. If they hadn't followed their king then, why would Thorin accept them now?

"Of course." Balin scoffed with a small smile. "At the time they left us Amelia, they didn't have much choice. We were too many. We couldn't possibly have found a place to settle and even more important, we wouldn't have been able to find so much food in a short time span. We had to go our separate ways."

I was listening attentively to his words. This was a part of the dwarves' history that was really important but I knew nothing about it. I had heard tales of their old kings and warriors, but they rarely spoke of their time in exile, which was perfectly understandable. Balin was speaking like an old professor would, he had all my attention.

"Some went back to the Iron Hills, where Thorin's cousin accepted them. Some went south to Gondor mostly. The kingdoms of men are often at war, and they always need good artisans to work stone or metal. Several families still live down there and provide shelter to our caravans when we deal with them." Balin paused for a second before he shook his head and continued. "They will all be welcome in Erebor. They are the dwarves of Erebor, just like we are."

I nodded.

I understood. Survival was what had driven those dwarves apart, but even though they lived

In different parts of the world, they were still in their heart and mind the dwarves of Erebor.

Erebor…

Somehow at this particular moment I genuinely felt curious and excited about it.

If so many people after so many years still dreamt about this place, still called it their home, then what a wonder it should be.

Yes, at that instant I felt that I truly wanted to help the dwarves, help my family, go back home.

The rest of that afternoon I spent in the library with Ori. He read aloud books that were written in Common and I took notes. My notebook was now filled with names of plants and recipes for ointments and potions. After awhile though I remembered the advice I had been given and, with Ori's help, I went to the infirmary to ask for some specific plants I had read about and didn't have in my bags.

The apprentices were kind enough to give us what they could and soon Ori and I were back on our way to the balcony where I packed everything safely in my pouch.

The next hours seemed to pass in an instant, and quite soon I was falling asleep on my bunk.

I jolted awake when I felt a hand shake my shoulder slightly.

"Amelia, wake up." Dori's voice said in a low whisper. "You have to wake up. We're leaving now. Is your bag ready?"

"Umm what?" I sat on my bunk and rubbed my eyes, completely disorientated.

I looked around and saw that my friends were all awake and clearly finishing to pack up their backpacks.

"But it's still dark." I yawned and looked at Dori.

"Thorin wants us to leave quickly and quietly. He doesn't want the elves to stop us."

Little by little my brain started to wake up and Dori's words finally started to make more sense.

"Would they try to stop us?"

"It's possible." Ori was the one to answer and I realized that he was holding my pack.

Immediately I stood up and, with the brothers help, my bunk was soon rolled and packed and I was as ready as I could be.

"Do you have everything?" Dori asked, reminding me once again of my aunt.

I nodded, still half asleep. Ori handed me the leather coat I usually wore on top of my long tunic, and my warm cloak that would protect me from wind and rain. Before I put them on though, I took my pouch and with Ori's help, I used the long leather strap to wear it over my shoulder and to hold it in place in my back. It wouldn't bother me nor would it hinder my moves as we made sure it was flat against my back, just below my shoulder blades. Then only did I put my leather coat on and my daggers. As Nori had insisted, I still wore my smaller knife hidden in my boot as well as a short blade under the leather cuff Dori had gifted me.

One minute later I had my warm cloak on and my pack was thrown over my shoulders. With my long staff in hand I was as ready to go as I would ever be.

I took a second to look around.

The other dwarves were already starting to gather near the door but I wanted to glance one last time at the view from the balcony. The night was so peaceful. Nothing disturbed the peace of this place and somehow, even though its beauty was doubtless, I knew I would have never been able to feel really at ease here. Yes, it had this odd, homely feeling that seemed to permeate the whole place, but it didn't really mean that I would be happy living here. I couldn't live here. I couldn't be truly at home here. I needed the noise, the mess, the loud cheerfulness.

I smiled softly.

Once again I could only admit that I had been somewhat lucky meeting the dwarves.

It was definitely odd how at home I was with them.

Someone cleared his throat behind me and I quickly turned to see that they were starting to leave the balcony. Nori was there, asking me silently if everything was alright. Looking into his grey eyes I could only smile wider and nod.

Silently we followed the other.

Soon enough we were on a small pathway that lead us out of the valley. As we were about to turn away from the valley I knew that now was my last chance to glance at this magical place. Stopping I looked above my shoulder. Mister Baggins had done the exact same thing. As a muffled voice ordered us to keep up, our eyes met. I offered a small, hesitant smile. I had no idea where I stood with the hobbit. Our last words hadn't really been that friendly.

His own small smile told me he wasn't sure either.

Wordlessly we each took one last glimpse of the magnificent valley before we trotted to catch up with the others.

And just like that, in the middle of the night, we went back on the road.

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><p><strong>AN: As usual I want to thank everyone. It always makes me incredibly happy to read your reviews. I honestly am addicted to them. Thanks a lot for those of you who let me know what they think of the plot. And thanks as well to the very kind reviewers who wrote that they loved this story. Thanks, a thousand thanks. I know that those past months haven't been ideal for the updates. I apologize but I honestly struggled to write those chapters. <strong>

**I had several points to tackle in this one, and I hope that it wasn't too boring. As you can see though, now we'll be getting in the quest part. Rest assured that I WILL NOT make a repeat of the movie script. As you all know by now, I'm not really one to do everything like most others do. I'll try my best to mix both movie and book. **

**Thanks as well to everyone who participated in the poll. I took my decision. There will be no Tauriel/Kili romance, though Tauriel might appear as a named elf of Mirkwood (I'm undecided). I will soon post another one, regarding the end of the battle of 5 armies. **

**As inspiration struck these past few days, I might be able to post another chapter next sunday (yay me if I manage to do that :P)**

**I wish you all a good week... Thanks to all the brave souls who read this story so far :)**


	49. Little by Little, One Travels Far

**everything belongs to JRRTolkien except for the OC and odd parts of the plot.**

**The title for this chapter is a quote from Tolkien too**

* * *

><p>Travelling with the dwarves was always an experience.<p>

When it was on a regular mission, it could be very nice. I could easily remember some moments on the road where I had a lot of fun, especially with Bofur, Fili and Kili. I also had some very nice discussions with Dori, and Dwalin, between all his grunts, would always answer my questions or provide some tips or instructions. Dwarves were cautious, but overall their behaviour didn't change much when they were travelling.

All in all I hadn't travelled all that much with dwarves, but except for a few memorable dangerous events, those missions had been rather pleasant. Or at least they usually had until the moment it all turned sour.

Balin and Dori had told me that this wasn't a simple mission. This was a quest. It was a serious matter. It wasn't supposed to be anything like what I had experienced so far. Even though the word quest made me think of video games or old myths, for my companions, this was something extremely serious. A quest was truly what this expedition was. A quest to conquer their homeland back.

I could see it now.

The dwarves were behaving slightly differently than they usually would. Dwalin was never far from the king and only spoke with him, or sometimes with Balin, Gloin and Dori. Oin was usually not far from his brother, but he didn't bother to take out his little trumpet except when we were taking a rest, which didn't happen that often.

Bofur and Bifur seemed to always hover nearby Bombur, and the round dwarf didn't seem to appreciate their concern all that much. Some other times Bofur would just walk to Nori who was walking slightly aside and the two would discuss in hushed tones. There was nothing merry about this whole journey. The dwarves were all quite serious.

It was no surprise that I ended up walking with Ori, Fili and Kili. The four of us were the youngest and were in the back of the group. We didn't discuss all that much, but at least Fili and Kili would from time to time exchange some silly banter, or Ori would gladly tell me more about one story or another.

Not too far behind us, mister Baggins walked alone. I didn't really like it, but had no idea what to do about that. Still, I was glad that the hobbit managed to follow our fast pace.

The first day we walked quite fast, Thorin was really in a hurry to leave the elves' grounds far behind us. At first only the moonlight lit the way for us. Really, if we hadn't been in such a rush, I would probably have enjoyed the walk in the fresh air while watching the stars in the endless sky. The sun rose slowly, tinting the horizon in pinkish tones, but we kept walking at a quick pace. It was only late in the morning, or even possibly in the early afternoon only, that we stopped for a short pause.

We had left the rocky paths surrounding the elves' valley and we were going in the direction of a mountain path that would lead us high in the mountains to allow us to cross them. Right now though, we were in some sort of grassy area with boulders here and there and small hills. Thorin decided to take a break near one of those boulders.

I let my bag fall to the ground and sat with my back against the rock. I wasn't tired because of the walk, but the night had been short. I closed my eyes for a second only to be forced to open them when Dori talked to me.

"Are you alright?"

He didn't even try to hide the worry and concern from his face.

"Yes, don't worry." I smiled. "Are we far from the mountain path?"

"Not too far, I think." He replied, handing me a piece of bread and an apple. "We'll probably find it in a few days, a week at most."

"Probably?" I repeated, surprised to hear he wasn't sure.

He didn't seem bothered by the fact that we didn't know where to go. I waited for him to explain a bit more while the others were all sitting nearby, discussing one topic or another and not paying attention to us.

"We haven't travelled through these parts in quite awhile." He explained with a shrug before sitting next to me. "The path we're trying to find is an old one. There's no road going east anymore. Even the elves don't cross the mountains so far north anymore."

He bit into his own piece of bread and I imitated him. The bread was soft but my mind didn't register this fact, too busy thinking back on Dori's words to actually appreciate the quality of the elvish bread.

"So we're not even sure we'll find an actual path?" I couldn't help but ask.

"Don't worry Amelia. We'll find a way across the mountains." Dori patted my knee kindly before he stood back up to join Gloin, Dwalin, Oin, Balin and Thorin a bit further away.

I watched him go until I saw Nori and Bofur come closer to sit with me.

"He's right Amelia, we'll find a way. We're used to travel now." Bofur said with a smile.

Nori sat quietly and started to eat his apple. He seemed rather careless but his eyes kept darting around, as if he was keeping watch more than relaxing. Bofur for his part was his usual, cheery self.

"Oh, I'm sure you'll find some way to cross the mountains." I replied before I added with a smile. "I'm just worried about the kind of way you'll find."

"What does that mean?" Bofur chuckled.

"It means that I've followed some of Nori's shortcuts and really I don't want to climb that mountain." I smiled broadly at Nori who quirked an eyebrow and shrugged.

He let his arms rest on his knees, holding his half-eaten apple lazily in his hand and finally he decided to take part in the discussion.

"You did fine and it was a shortcut."

I could have laughed at the way he stated this. I struggled for a second, trying to keep from smirking, but not entirely managing to stop my lips to quirk slightly upwards.

"Right… jumping from rock to rock is not what I call a path." My smile was enough for the both of them to know I was joking.

"Well, don't worry." Bofur laughed. "I'm sure Thorin will not climb that mountain. You'll see, it'll be so boring that you'll wish for something to happen."

We all laughed then.

Still, we all knew that Bofur's words were more a wish than truth. We'd probably find some trouble on the way. I knew we were being tracked, why and by what, I didn't know though. Still, we would be lucky if our enemies didn't find our trail and didn't follow us in the mountains.

A few minutes later only, we were back on the road.

I could tell from the way the dwarves were looking around that they were worried about our enemies popping out of nowhere. Oddly enough I wasn't nervous. Maybe it was because I had been so out of my mind when I met those orcs, or maybe because I trusted the dwarves so much.

The day ended up being quite boring. I busied myself looking around at whatever plants and flowers I could see. If I could spot some fresh, useful ones, it might be a good idea to pick them. My search was fruitless so far, but it did keep my mind busy and I wasn't bored so much as I could have been. There wasn't much to do except walking. So I walked. I kept pace easily with the dwarves and it allowed me to let my thought drift aimlessly. There was no need for me to think as I walked.

When Thorin called for us to stop and prepare to camp, I was quite surprised at first. The sun was low in the sky, but from what I could tell, we still had a few more hours of sunlight before sunset. It was odd that he would chose to stop when there was clearly long hours left before nightfall. As I glanced around, I realized that the other dwarves didn't comment on it so I imitated them. There was no point in voicing my surprise just yet.

Thorin had decided to stop near a few trees and bushes. Several large boulders surrounded us. I could see Dwalin and Thorin pointing at the flat top of one of those, probably discussing how to climb it, even I could tell it would be a good spot to stand watch. Our position was naturally protected by the rocks around, hiding us from sight.

"Can we risk a fire?" Bombur asked no one in particular.

"Surely we can." Gloin grumbled. "Lads, go catch some fresh meat to eat."

Immediately Fili and Kili nodded and jumped to their feet. Meanwhile I had let my backpack down and took a minute to roll my shoulders and stretch my back. I heard a pop coming from my spine and I sighed softly.

"Amelia, Ori," Thorin's voice forced me to look at him. "Gather wood for the fire." I nodded and he looked around before he continued. "Bofur, go with them. Oin, Gloin, you'll get the fire going when they come back. Bombur, wait before preparing anything. I don't want to waste food. We won't find much game in the mountains. Nori, scout around. Try to see if we were followed."

I glanced at Nori as he silently stood back and walked away. It wasn't surprising that he was the one sent to accomplish this particular task. Wordlessly I followed Ori and Bofur. I really wondered whether Fili and Kili would manage to catch something in this place. There were few trees but it was easy to spot the various small copses that were scattered around the plain. I started to look around and collect pieces of dry wood. I was used to the task now and I knew what I should be looking for. I had to be careful not to get any green wood or anything wet that would create too much smoke. We were trying to be discreet after all. Bofur and Ori were nearby when I crouched to grab a long piece of dry wood that seemed stuck in one bush.

After a few unsuccessful tries, I heard Bofur's unmistakable chuckle behind me.

"Need help Amelia? Is the bush stronger than you?" There was no mistaking the mocking tone of his voice.

"No." I said while yanking on the stupid branch. "I'm fine." I huffed and yanked again. "Tha…arrh"

As I yanked one last, brutal time, the branch finally gave and I staggered backwards before heavily falling in one huge bush behind me.

Immediately Bofur's laugh rang loudly while Ori exclaimed in a worried, yet amused voice.

"Amee! Are you alright?"

"I…"

Oh dear Mahal.

I tried to get up, but I instantly regretted placing my bare hands behind me for leverage. Thick thorns pierced my skin and I jerked, scratching both my hands and face against the vicious bush's thorns. I could feel that my hair and cloak were completely caught in it.

"Help." I squeaked while Bofur was busy laughing.

In the end it took both Ori's and Bofur's help to free me from that stupid bush. I had scratches and cuts everywhere my skin hadn't been protected by leather or wool.

"Defeated by a bush. You should be ashamed." Bofur joked as he heaved me to my feet.

"Oh, shut up." I groaned, which only made him laugh more.

My left hand had a few deeper cuts from when I had tried to free myself. I sighed.

"Go back to camp Amee, we'll take care of the firewood." Ori kindly said with a smile.

He patted my shoulder as I sighed once more loudly. Refusing to obey him, I shook my head and busied myself with gathering small woods to get the fire going. I left the larger branches to Bofur and Ori who were both still chuckling lightly. It didn't take us long to go back to camp and as soon as we stepped into view Thorin spoke.

"What took you so…" He stopped when he spotted me from behind Bofur and Ori. "What happened this time?" He sighed annoyingly.

I could feel the blush creep up my cheeks as I looked down to my feet. Wordlessly I brought the wood I was holding to Oin and Gloin. Meanwhile Bofur was telling a weird tale of me fighting off a bush fairy. Gloin shook his head in disbelief and concentrated on getting the fire going. Oin grabbed my chin and looked at the scratches and cuts on my face and grunted.

"Clean that up." He groaned before helping his brother with the fire.

I sighed loudly and went to grab a clean cloth in my bag. Dori was on the other side of the camp, talking in hushed tones with Balin, Dwalin and Thorin. I winced when I rubbed one of my cuts against the hard leather of my backpack. I felt completely disheartened by this stupid adventure. How could I not look silly and useless when something like that happened?

"Are you alright?" A small voice called from behind me.

I startled slightly and looked over my shoulder.

"Here, take this. The elves gave me two of them. They're clean." Mister Baggins softly said while handing me a clean handkerchief.

I blinked for a second before I took it.

"Thanks mister Baggins." I kindly replied, forcing a smile on my lips.

He nodded and seemed to hesitate a bit before he turned away. Before he left though, I heard him whisper something.

"You can call me Bilbo, you know."

My smile was genuine this time as I replied.

"Thanks Bilbo."

I watched him walk back to his own bunk and jolted once more when another voice surprised me, talking in my back.

"I leave your side for not even half an hour and you look like you've been through battle while I was away." Nori said sounding amused though I could tell he was genuinely concerned too. "What in Mahal's name happened to you this time?"

"You should have seen that Nori!" Bofur exclaimed, trotting towards us.

I looked up to meet Nori's eyes. Bofur was completely lost in his tale, oblivious to what was happening around him. Nori's grey eyes were so filled with repressed emotions that I felt a shiver ran down my spine. I noticed his clenched fists, a good sign that he was barely managing to contain himself. I couldn't be sure what it was exactly that he was trying not to do, but when I saw his eyes trail over my face and to the clean handkerchief I held, I guessed he wanted to help me.

My heart was beating wildly, hammering against my chest as an image of Nori tenderly taking care of me popped in my mind. My breath was caught in my throat as I met Nori's eyes. I had never felt the need to be taken care of so strongly before. It was an entirely too foreign sensation for me. I was probably about to do something stupid when Bofur suddenly walked between me and Nori, breaking the contact between our eyes and breaking the spell.

Quickly I lowered my gaze and grabbed my water skin. My hands were shaking. I poured a bit of water on the cloth and simply washed my face and hands. There wasn't much I could do anyway. Later, when there would be a fire, I would boil some water with thyme to clean the scratches more thoroughly. For now though, this would do.

I tried my best to avoid thinking about Nori. I tried my best to avoid looking at him. I didn't trust myself right now. I didn't know whether or not I would be able to school my features. Probably not.

Thankfully, Fili and Kili came back, providing a much needed distraction.

I soon found myself next to Bombur, skinning three rabbits. It wasn't much. Especially when one thought about how much a dwarf usually ate. But those three rabbits would have to do. Bombur was starting to prepare some stew. Meanwhile Ori had found, with Bilbo's help, a bush covered with berries as well as some mushrooms.

The sun was touching the horizon when we finally started to eat, rather silently, all gathered around the fire.

I was sitting between Bilbo and Ori. We were all eating quietly when Thorin spoke.

"Starting tonight, two of us will keep watch at the same time." He gruffly said. "I don't want any surprise. Gloin and Ori take the first one. Then Dwalin and Bombur. Dori and Kili. Fili and Bifur after that. Nori and Amelia take the last one. Amelia, you'll start preparing breakfast too, Nori will tell you when. One hour and a half per watch. Tomorrow we'll change."

Everyone nodded at this. I tried to concentrate on something completely different to avoid smiling broadly when I heard I would be able to be with Nori. Instead of thinking about it, I listed in my head words in Khuzdul that I could actually remember. Unfortunately it didn't take long.

I quickly finished my stew and simply didn't pay attention to the dwarves.

As soon as the food was finished, the dwarves started to prepare their bunks. We broke in small groups around the fire. Unsurprisingly, I ended up talking in low tones with Ori, Fili and Kili.

"Do you often have two persons on watch?" I asked, genuinely curious as I couldn't remember this happening in my previous travels.

"Uncle doesn't want to take any risk." Fili shrugged.

"It might happen in the longer travels, when you're crossing some particularly hostile regions." Ori added before smiling reassuringly. "But here it's just a precaution."

"I remember, in Dunland there were at least two of us per watch, sometimes three." Kili commented, grinning as usual.

"Can't you shut up about this mission to Dunland?" Fili groaned, though the spark in his eyes proved he wasn't being mean. "Since you came back it's always 'When I went to Dunlands', 'Dunland this' or 'Dunland that'."

"You're just jealous brother." Kili retorted, his grin wider than ever.

I shook my head at their antics, but it didn't stop me to watch them. I glanced at Ori and we both rolled our eyes at the same time before snorting. Thoughts of the mission were forgotten as a smirk started to grow on my lips.

"Right." Fili chuckled. "I'm jealous of my beardless, kid brother. Sure."

"I went on an important mission." Kili puffed his chest. "And you just stayed in the Halls."

I felt my smirk grew some more and couldn't resist the urge to cut in.

"Oh…he didn't. Fili went with us to Archet." I said, smiling at the blond prince whose eyes shone with amusement.

"It's not the same!" Kili protested. "It's not nearly as dangerous or adventurous."

"It was plenty dangerous." Ori drawled. "They almost got killed what, twice at least, during that mission. And they managed to get rid of the thieves that were attacking the caravans."

"Admit it baby brother. Your mission was boring compared to ours." Fili laughed while throwing his arm around his brother's shoulders.

"Why are you ganging up against me?" The youngest dwarf whined.

We all laughed softly at Kili's pout. He did try to convince us some more, but to be honest, it was too much fun teasing him. We were all chuckling softly when we sat on our bunks, still not quite tired enough to sleep. I calmly prepared some infusion to clean my wounds while Fili started to smoke. Kili was on his back, looking at the stars, pretending unsuccessfully to be angry. He smiled too much for us to believe he was pouting. Ori was already writing notes in his notebook, documenting our journey.

"I wish we were in Erebor already." Kili suddenly whispered only for the four of us to hear.

"Aye, me too." Fili agreed.

Ori just nodded and hummed. I looked at them. Neither of them had ever seen Erebor, yet they were so eager to go there. It was yet another proof, if one was needed, that Erebor meant much more to the dwarves than many could think.

"I wonder what it'll look like." I said softly.

And I was being honest. Thorin's Halls were impressive for me. I couldn't help but be amazed at the statues or carved ceilings. Yet, these Halls were rather young, especially compared to a place like Erebor. Even though I wasn't a dwarf, I felt as if Erebor was some sort of mystical land. I knew almost nothing about it, just what other dwarves had told me and it wasn't much considering that no dwarf liked to talk about their lost kingdom.

"I'm sure it'll be amazing. Uncle used to say that it was the most beautiful place." Fili commented, puffing out a ring of smoke. "I can imagine the huge stone pillars that would seem endless."

"And carved ceilings. Uncle told us about the carved ceilings." Kili added, slightly excited. "He said that no one needed to see the sky anymore once he saw them."

"I heard there were magnificent statues everywhere and that the entrance hall was huge." Ori had stopped writing.

We kept silent for awhile, no doubt all thinking about Erebor and how it could be like. In a way, I couldn't really trust my imagination. I had this odd feeling that, whatever I would imagine wouldn't do Erebor justice. It was the strangest of feelings I had, but even though I wasn't a dwarf, I felt something every time Erebor was mentioned. If the dwarves were to be trusted, then nothing I had ever seen would be able to compare to Erebor's beauty.

Wordlessly, I had packed back my pouch and had strapped it again on my back. Even asleep I didn't want to detach it. I didn't remove my weapons either. I slept fully clothed and armed. I didn't want to take a chance and, looking around, it was easy to see that the dwarves would be doing the same.

Quickly enough I fell asleep. The day's walk had been enough to tire me.

Fili was the one to kindly shake my shoulder as I awoke in a jolt.

I was breathing heavily as I sat on my bunk and looked at my friend.

"Is it time for my watch?" I whispered.

"No." He replied softly. "My watch just started. You were having a nightmare."

I nodded as I tiredly rubbed my forehead. I wiped the sweat away and shivered.

"Nori is just over there." Fili added in a low voice. "He's awake I think."

I looked where Fili pointed and saw Nori sitting up at the same time. I sighed and, with Fili's help, got up to my feet. I staggered a bit, clumsier than ever as I was barely awake. I walked as silently as possible towards Nori and sat next to him. Wordlessly he covered me with his warm coat and encircled my waist with his arm. I sighed and closed my eyes. Without exchanging a glance or a word, he brought me closer to his chest and I nestled against him.

Nori simply caressed the back of my head, letting his fingers trail over some of my braids. Slowly he managed to lull me back into sleep for a bit over an hour.

Much too soon he woke me up.

He gently pushed me away from him, rubbing my arms a bit before he swiftly stood up. I was sitting on the ground, trying to gather my wits and looking around.

As I tiredly blinked I saw Bifur and Fili going back to their bunks. Nori was patiently waiting next to me. I took the hand he offered as he helped me up and for a second we took the risk to just hold each other. He placed a soft kiss on my brow just before he stepped away. It gave me energy. Silently he walked to one of the boulders that were nearby and pointed several spots to me. Then, easily, he climbed the rock and turned to watch me do the same. Placing my fingers in the holes he had pointed I gingerly climbed up, much more slowly than he had done.

Once I was up there we both sat shoulder to shoulder.

"Are you alright?" He whispered after awhile.

As he spoke he took my right hand and softly grazed the small visible cuts.

"Yes." I breathed out, letting my head fall on his shoulder.

"Don't sleep." He warned me before he brought my hand to his lips.

"I won't."

And I knew I wouldn't. I was tired but as awake as I could be. I didn't want to sleep when I could spend some time alone with Nori. Sure, I was paying attention to the noises around and was letting my eyes trail over the landscape, but I was with Nori. I didn't need to hide for the next hour and that was enough to make me feel much better.

I took his left hand in mine and absentmindedly let my fingers draw circles on his palm.

It was quiet.

The fire had died down to ambers.

Its glow was barely visible.

The only noises that disturbed the peace of the night came from the dwarves' snores.

I couldn't see anything in the hills ahead. The night was too dark. Heavy clouds were hiding the stars from us. I briefly wondered how the dwarves knew how much time had passed when they couldn't refer to the stars in the sky, but at that time I didn't care much so I kept silent.

That was just one of the many things I loved about Nori; we didn't need to talk. I didn't feel awkward when there was silence between us. I enjoyed every moment with him at my side, even if it was spent wordlessly, like it was during our watch.

After a short while he took his hand back from me and encircled my waist, squeezing lightly my hip. I looked up and smiled at him before quickly pecking the corner of his mouth. He smiled softly and turned to face me. I was smiling when his lips brushed against mine.

The kiss ended up all too soon but I still felt much better than I had in awhile.

"You should be looking that way." He whispered, pointing behind him.

I didn't reply and simply nodded. Placing a hand on his, I held it while I turned. We were now next to each other, and facing opposite directions, but Nori's arm was still holding me close to him. I let my own left arm circle his waist and I leant against his chest, letting my chin rest on his left shoulder. I brought my knees up and placed my right hand against his arm while I felt him mimic my position. Shortly after, he let his head rest on top of mine.

Silently I let my eyes trail over the darkness. I couldn't see the fire or the soft glow of its ambers so it didn't disturb my vision. Still, there wasn't much to look at or to see. I wouldn't complain though because I was with Nori.

Time passed quickly with nothing happening.

At some point I felt Nori shift against me and I straightened up, wondering if he had spotted something. I glanced at him to see where he was looking, readying myself to move quickly. He was looking at me. Immediately my heart rate, which had sped up a bit at the possibility of an attack, calmed down.

"You should go down, revive the fire and start to prepare everything." He whispered close to my ear.

I shivered slightly against him but remembering Thorin's orders I nodded.

I was about to slide to the side of the rock when Nori quickly cupped my face. I blinked. Then I closed my eyes as our lips met and he kissed me fully after what had felt like ages. I sighed softly before I let my hand grip his tunic.

"Be careful when you go down." He breathed out against my lips.

"Don't worry." I replied similarly before kissing him once more.

Was it odd that I couldn't seem to get enough of this feeling? His lips moved against mine and once again I felt that I wanted more, needed more. Before the kiss could grow more heated though, Nori inched away. A glimpse at his eyes told me that right then he wanted nothing more than to keep kissing me. Actually…his eyes were bright, his irises appeared darker, but that could have been the night. Quickly he pecked my lips once more and neither of us had the force to break the contact.

I wanted to scream in frustration when we had to break away. We looked at each other for a second. Clearly the feeling was shared. Sighing I started to climb down. Before my head disappeared below the rock, hiding Nori from my eyes, I looked up at him.

"I can't wait for this quest to be done with."

He smiled sadly and nodded.

Carefully, I went back down, only feeling safe once both my feet were back on stable ground. Pushing all thoughts of Nori aside, I started to work on the task assigned to me. Once the fire was rekindled, I put water to boil and only then did I go towards Bombur's sleeping form to wake him up.

He grumbled a bit before his eyes opened.

"Morning 'Melia." He grunted lowly.

"I'll prepare tea and mint for everyone." I whispered to him. "Do we have leftover stew or should we prepare some more?"

"I kept some juices from the stew. It'll do with bread." He replied, sitting up and scratching the top of his head.

I left him yawning loudly and walked back to the fire.

Just as I had experienced many times before during missions, breakfast was a quick process that morning. As soon as water was hot enough I prepared tea with mint leaves. Bombur then quickly started to wake the others. He didn't need to wake Thorin though, I realized then only that our leader had a very light sleep. Half an hour later, at the most, we were packing already. Bofur, Dwalin and Nori made sure to remove traces of our camp, or at least as much as possible.

The sun was barely starting to rise when we left.

The only person who seemed to find it hard was the hobbit. Poor Bilbo clearly wasn't used to travelling with dwarves. Thinking back about his kindness the previous evening, I decided to try once more to befriend him. The previous attempt hadn't really failed, but we weren't really close.

After just one day of travel though, I truly realized how lonely Bilbo actually was. We didn't speak much while we walked, but still, from time to time the dwarves discussed in small groups. Bilbo was always left out. Whose fault it was, I didn't care anymore. I could only imagine how hard and painful it would be for me to go through all this if I didn't have my friends, my kin with me.

So it was naturally that I ended up walking next to the hobbit.

Nori was hovering not too far ahead. I knew he could hear what we would say and I didn't mind. As I started to chitchat with Bilbo, we were soon joined by Ori. The kind hearted dwarf was naturally curious and as I asked Bilbo about his home, Ori slowed down to hear the answer. When the topic changed and we started to discuss tales, Fili and Kili both sped up and joined the discussion too.

In the end, the whole morning passed without the five of us really paying attention to it.

* * *

><p>Four more days passed in a very similar fashion. The only difference being that Bilbo was starting, just merely starting, to loosen up a bit. It was barely visible really. It wasn't that he was becoming friendlier, more that he didn't tense every time one of us spoke to him. And when I said one of us, I meant Fili, Kili, Ori and me. Bilbo was pretty much tense any time another dwarf came close to him.<p>

Bilbo, Ori, Fili, Kili and I were at the back of the column. Nori was usually not too far ahead or behind us.

It sometimes felt a bit as if he was babysitting us. But I didn't say a word about that. His presence nearby was actually both soothing and terribly frustrating. When the other younger member of the group didn't manage to distract me, I wanted nothing more than just walk to Nori and walk near him. I refrained to do so though. It would probably give away too much.

So instead I tried to concentrate on my surrounding when our discussions died down.

The landscape around us changed, but not much. High mountains were looming over us and the green plains and rocky hills seemed endless. Usually, Thorin chose to camp near copses of trees. At some point we had to get further away from the mountain than what our leader wanted. We needed to find water.

He was in a terrible mood for the entire day.

With water filling our water skins, we were now once more on our way towards the mountains. They seemed inhospitable. Actually inhospitable was probably too kind a way to describe the dark peaks surrounded by mist and grey clouds almost all the time. I didn't look forward climbing up those rocks. There was no vegetations, no plants and I could bet there would be no animals either. We would probably have to ration water and food, which would result in everyone becoming growingly grumpy as time would pass.

No. I really didn't look forward to it.

For now though, we were crossing an area covered in flowers. On the way, as I kept walking near Ori, I picked up as much dandelions as I could find. I knew we could eat them. The dwarves probably wouldn't love it, but I was quite sure they would rather eat greens than starve. Ori didn't comment. Not even when I just handed him a whole bunch of them and kept on picking up more.

Not too long after that, Thorin decided to stop. There was a small stream nearby, which didn't improve our leader's mood as he grumbled about wasting time looking for water for nothing. Then his gaze fell on me.

"What do you think you're doing? We're not here to pick flowers!" He exploded angrily.

All the dwarves looked at me then and for a second I froze. Ori was holding quite a lot of dandelions, flowers and leaves as I mostly tried to pluck them. I had probably as much in my own arms.

"Do you think this is a joke? Do you think this quest is a stroll in the wild?" Thorin was getting angrier and I knew I had to stop him quickly.

"It's food." I simply stated.

An eerie silence fell on our group. Suddenly Ori opened his arms and the dandelions fell at his feet. I rolled my eyes at him and looked at the frozen king.

"Dandelions' flowers and leaves can be eaten. I just thought that it could be better to eat this instead of using some of the food we packed." I explained calmly.

"These are edible?" Thorin frowned.

"Yes." I nodded and to prove my point, I quickly took one of the flowers and ate it. "I know you won't be happy with it." I looked pointedly at Ori. "But it's better than nothing."

Thorin strode towards me and, surprising me, picked a flower and ate it. He seemed to think for a second then I saw him look over my shoulder.

"Fili, Amelia and Bofur, go pick more of those. Kili, try to see if you can find some meat. The rest of us prepare the camp."

There was an instant of silence as all the dwarves, except Thorin, seemed to freeze on the spot. It was quite funny really, if it didn't mean that they would once more complain about my weird cooking taste. I shrugged and let my bag fall to my feet. I picked up all the dandelions I had already and placed them in a neat pile near my bag. Then I simply walked a few meters away and started to pluck more out of the ground. Soon I was joined by Bofur who was whistling happily.

Fili seemed a bit lost as he started to work with us. Clearly the young warrior wasn't used to such work. I smiled at him and pointed which flowers and leaves he had to pick. Quickly we had quite a bunch of them. Bilbo had even taken upon himself to help us with this task. The hobbit wasn't nearly as perturbed at the thought of eating flowers as the dwarves were. I offered him a wide smile and I saw him grin back. Neither of us was bothered by this task. My friends, contrarily to the hobbit, were grumpy when they saw us come back with all the green food. Thankfully for them, Kili managed to catch a few birds that were soon being prepared by Bombur.

As he started to prepare the animals, he invited me to look and help him.

My reaction was nothing like it could have been a year ago and I was genuinely curious. Mahal, now I actually wanted to know how he would pluck the feathers away as I knew that this was actually the kind of knowledge I could very well need some day.

I didn't even blink when Bombur swiftly cut the heads of the dead animals. Somehow this sort of events had changed from disgusting to natural in my mind. Once I saw how Bombur was doing it, I even decided to quicken the process and grabbed one of the birds to imitate him.

Soon enough we were cooking what little meat that was to be found on the birds and Bombur was asking how he should prepare the flowers.

"They can be eaten raw, like a salad." I replied with a shrug, rinsing the blood on my hands in the cold stream. "You could steam the leaves, but I don't think it's worth the trouble."

Dinner that evening wasn't as joyous as it could have been. The dwarves had plenty to eat…they just didn't like what food they had. I had to bite back a laugh when I saw Dwalin glare at a dandelion before gingerly biting its flower off. None of the dwarves seemed convinced that it was food. Bilbo and I were the only ones who ate everything without blinking. Bombur was the only dwarf that was curious enough to ask me if I knew of some other flowers that could be eaten like this.

"Bombur, I swear if you start cooking flowers for the dining halls…" Dwalin gruffly said in a menacing tone.

The round dwarf shrugged, clearly not impressed by the bald warrior.

"Bombur isn't the one you should threaten." Bofur said with a smirk. "Amelia is behind any weird idea he might have."

"Oy." Ori intervened. "Don't you dare threaten Amelia!"

"Just sayin'." Bofur shrugged with a cheeky smile. "And everyone knows you agree with me, Ori." He added with a wink.

My kind Ori, the one I saw as a brother, started to blush a deep red and stammered an unintelligible answer while many around snorted or chuckled. I patted his knee, reassuring him a little. There was nothing to add to that. Bofur wasn't exactly wrong and I knew it already. I would have had to be both deaf and blind not to know that Ori hated most of my favourite recipes.

It wasn't as if I expected any of them to like the flowers anyway. Somehow it was equally amusing and annoying to witness their reactions to the food I had offered. But dwarves had a practical mind if nothing else when they were on a mission. Food was food. Green food was better than starvation.

After those first exchanges, dinner turned pretty quiet and we all finished quickly.

While the dwarves were already starting to settle for the night, I stood up and stretched. Glancing around, I checked that no one was paying attention to me. Silently I went to gather my bag and as I held it against my chest I swiftly went to Ori and whispered a few words for him only.

"I'm going a bit further upstream."

As he quirked an eyebrow questioningly I decided to explain a bit further, but kept my voice low enough that only him would hear.

"Just want to freshen up a bit." I couldn't help but blush.

The young dwarf blushed too and nodded.

"Be careful." He breathed out as I quickly moved past him.

"I'll scream if something goes wrong." I nodded and disappeared in the night.

It wasn't difficult to follow the stream, even though the night was dark, there was still some light filtering both from the fire and from the stars. Still, darkness was deep enough to protect me from the dwarves' eyes. I was quite certain that none of them would look my way anyway. One thing was sure though, they tried their best to respect my privacy. When I needed to escape their presence for a private and natural moment, they would always turn their back to the direction I went to, and would usually completely ignore me. I knew though that it didn't mean they weren't ready to intervene if something were to happen to me while I was away from the group.

Just before I left the ring of light provided by our fire, I glanced above my shoulder. Without even trying to I found Nori's eyes. I offered him a small smile but quickly walked away. I was still blushing and the thought, that in a few minutes I would be almost entirely naked not twenty meters away from a group of men, wasn't really something I was really comfortable with.

I had to walk a bit more slowly as the darkness swallowed me. The ground wasn't flat and I stumbled a few times. I even stepped in the stream but that wasn't too much of a trouble as I was looking for it.

Once I decided that I was both far enough and close enough from our camp, I let my bag fall quietly to the ground. I squinted my eyes and looked around. I could still see the dim light of our camp but I was half hidden behind a tree and in the dark. Slowly, because my fingers were slightly shaking, I started to untie the knots of my outer leather tunic. Carefully I also untied the satchel that was safely tied to my back and put it on the floor. Soon it was followed by my two daggers. Then down went the short and supple leather corset, the long woollen tunic. For a minute I stood in my light linen tunic, breeches and boots. I glanced around and held my breath. No noise came from anywhere nearby and my eyes couldn't see anything odd.

Quietly I sat on the ground and removed my leather cuff and placed the small blade next to it. Then I removed my boots, leaving the hidden dagger in its place. Quickly I removed the breeches I was now used to wear.

I could feel my cheeks burn.

Even during the missions with the dwarves I had never done anything like this. I had sometimes spent two weeks in missions without really having the opportunity to clean a bit. But this time was a bit different.

It wasn't that I suddenly realized that I had to clean. No. Anyway, washing oneself while on a mission definitely wasn't a priority. If you had the opportunity, it was great. If you didn't, well, then the warm baths in Thorin's Halls felt even better. Anyway, after a week walking everyone in the company smelt, so I wasn't even self conscious about that either. No. this time the problem was a typical, female issue that particularly annoyed me right then.

What would I give to get some of my previous world's pills? About anything right now.

I had started to feel cramps the day before. Previously I had always managed to avoid travelling while I had my periods. It had been a close call once or twice, especially when the trips had been unsuspectingly longer than they should have been. This time would be the first time I would have my periods while being on a mission. I really wasn't looking forward the next few days. I could tell that the next three to four days will be especially tough for me. There was nothing I could do about it.

If my calculation and my knowledge of my own body were correct, I had at least several days, maybe even a week, before anything happened. But tonight at least I could use the opportunity to freshen up a bit before my periods actually started. I could also use the time away from all those men to try and find out a way to be discreet about this. It really wasn't a topic I wished to broach with any of the dwarves.

As those thoughts went through my head, I had removed my linen tunic, bindings and lastly the weirdly cut panties that the seamstresses had made for me awhile ago.

The cold air of the night made me shiver as my skin quickly covered in goose bumps.

Quickly, because I really didn't want to spend more time here than was utterly necessary, I stepped in the stream.

"Fu…" I bit my lower lip as my body started to shake violently.

The water wasn't cool. It wasn't cold either. It was freezing. Somehow I had the feeling I had stepped in a pool filled with ice cubes. Not that I had ever done that, but it was how I imagined it could feel.

Quickly I started to move and splashed water on me. I didn't have soap or anything so it really wasn't ideal, but it was better than nothing.

My teeth were already clattering loudly. I could bet my lips were turning blue as I jogged out of the stream.

I didn't lose any second as I opened my backpack and grabbed what would serve as my towel and was actually my blanket. As quickly as possible I dressed back up. Tying knots with my fingers trembling from the cold proved as difficult as untying them when shivering because of my nerves.

When finally I stepped back in the circle of light of our camp, none of the dwarves made any comment about my short disappearance. None of them actually looked at me. I wouldn't lie, I was rather glad they acted this way.

That night, for the first time since we left Rivendell, I didn't have to take a watch. Thorin was forcing us to rotate for the watch, changing the teams as well. I hadn't been able to spend time alone with Nori since that first watch. I lay on my bunk, with Ori on one side and Bilbo on the other. I knew Nori was sleeping just a few meters away.

As I fell asleep, I couldn't help but curse my own idea once more. How had I expected to spend time with him at night on a quest? I didn't know. Clearly I hadn't thought this through when I spoke back in Rivendell. Sighing a bit sadly I closed my eyes. There was nothing I could do.

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><p>During the following days, the landscape started to change. Little by little we were leaving the green hills behind us. The paths we walked on now were rocky and muddy. We were still at the foot of the mountain when rain started to fall. Thank Mahal it wasn't a heavy downpour. Still, it was far from enjoyable.<p>

The rain was soaking everything, making my bag and coat seem heavier than they actually were. My mood had started to become slightly unstable. Even though I tried my best to remain my usual self, it felt as if everything was made to upset me.

The cramps in my lower stomach were particularly vicious this time, as if nature itself had decided to make this quest more difficult for me. The chilling rain wasn't helping, far from it actually. I was daydreaming about hot water skins pressed against my stomach. I barely spoke with the others, but to be fair, none of us were particularly chatty.

I was walking rather slowly that day and I was maybe a bit more behind than I should have been. Honestly, I hadn't been paying much attention to the others. It probably was the reason why I startled so violently when I heard Nori's voice so close to me.

"Are you alright?"

Concern was heavy in his voice and it almost instantly made my heart both beat stronger and squeeze a bit in guilt. I was the one worrying him and it wasn't fair for him at all. Forcing a smile on my lips I tried my best to reassure him. It wasn't easy. Nori knew me better than most, if not better than everyone else.

"I'm fine."

He immediately quirked one of his braided eyebrow while eyeing me from under his hood.

"I'm tired of this rain. It makes me moody." I wasn't really lying there.

"It probably won't get better when we go up the mountains." He replied evenly.

I didn't need to put my question into words. Apparently the look on my face had been enough for Nori to realize I wanted him to develop his thoughts.

"These aren't called the Misty Mountains for nothing." He pointed at the mountains."It often rains here. Usually when the sun shines, they're covered in a heavy mist. If the sun doesn't shine…well it's usually raining."

I groaned.

There was no point in trying to hide my annoyance.

Rain or mist.

I wondered silently which was the worst.

As I was about to get lost in those moody thoughts for a bit, I was forced out of them when I felt a warm, calloused hand gently catch mine. My eyes immediately went to Nori. He only glimpsed at me and offered me a small smile before he looked ahead again. I imitated him. None of the others was paying any attention to us. We were the last in the long line of our company.

Lightly, I squeezed his hand.

A small smile was now floating on my lips as warmth seemed to radiate from my hand, along my arm and to my whole body.

As we kept walking in silence, heads slightly bents to protect from the elements, I couldn't help but wonder. Wasn't it odd that from the slightest touch, Nori could make me feel so much better?

The following day, rain was still pouring on us as we started our slow ascend of the mountains.

The rocks were a dark grey. Rain turned the small path we followed into a tricky, slippery trap. At first it was alright. The slope wasn't too difficult to follow, but as we walked further up it became narrower and I more often than not had to grip the rocks on the side to avoid falling. As if the day couldn't have been worse, a sharp pain in my lower abdomen and a well known feeling alerted me that my periods had started.

It couldn't get any worse than that.

"Will this rain never stop?" I whined to myself.

"Not bloody likely." Kili shouted at me.

The wind had started to become stronger too. It whipped us, sending rain directly in our face. Each time it felt as if ice shards were thrown at me. We walked way more slowly than we had in the plains. It was to be expected though. Little by little we ascended the mountain side and the path grew impossibly trickier for each meter we gained.

Kili was walking just in front of me, behind his brother. In my back I could feel Nori's reassuring presence. Like the previous day, the two of us were the last in line. As my memories brought me back to the innocent gesture from that day, a violent gust of wind caught my long heavy cloak.

I yelped as I suddenly lost my footing, slipping on the wet rock. I felt the rumble on the side of the path give under my weight. My hands shot toward the rocks on the mountain side but only grasped air. My hood fell on my back as I felt my body inch towards the precipice. My eyes seemed suddenly riveted on the huge fall that awaited me.

I held my breath.

Then something yanked violently on my arm. It felt as if my shoulder would be dislocated. To be honest, I didn't care if it were the case. Who would complain about a dislocated shoulder when the alternative was so…definitive? In an instant my body hit another violently and the both of us stumbled backwards.

For a second my heart stopped.

Pure terror coursed through my veins and froze my blood.

Nori was about to fall to his death because of me.

* * *

><p><strong>AN: Well, just two days late this week, I'm getting better :P **

**Thanks everyone for the kind reviews. I was genuinely moved and happy when I read how much some of you like this story. And the kind comments about me, my writings and this story are really a great motivation. If you think this story is nice, let me tell you it's thanks to all those kind words too. I wouldn't have had the courage to post this story here if no one had read it. :) So thanks everyone and welcome to all the new readers (I think there's still a couple every week or so :P ) **

**On a completely random topic, I hadn't realized that it's been more than a year already... O_O Am I the only one surprised by that? Well, thanks for all the readers who stayed with me for so long :P **

**I know this chapter is slowly going back to the quest, I didn't want to rush into action without any transition, so that's why this chapter is a bit shorter, and without much happening (except for the ending ^^) and I hope it'll indicate to everyone that I don't intend to follow exactly either the movie or the book (by the way...I didn't like the last movie, so I'm probably NOT going to follow it, at all.) Anyway...well I hope you liked it (and yes, I know that talking about Amelia's periods isn't glamourous, but on the other hand...well it's natural and more realistic this way. ^^ so I hope I'm not going to lose anyone because of it.)**

**I'll try and post something new in a week or two latest.**


	50. Thunder and Darkness

**Everything is the property of JRRTolkien, except for my OC and odd parts of the plot.  
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><p>I panted heavily.<p>

My eyes were wide open but partly unseeing. I couldn't hear anything except the howling of the wind in my ears. My whole body was frozen as my mind reeled with the events that had just occurred. Then what could have happened started to play in my thoughts and my body started to shake violently. The heavy rain and the whipping wind were forgotten. They didn't matter. The only thing that mattered right now was the terrible fear that still gripped my heart tightly.

"Nori! Amelia!" I finally heard a voice shout next to me.

The same yells were repeated further away. Finally, after what seemed to be an eternity, I managed to blink and look at my side.

Kili's face was paler than I had ever seen. It was a stark contrast with his black hair. His hand was extended towards me, but he wasn't touching me. I could see his lips tremble slightly. Just behind him, Fili wasn't in a much better state. After that I could only distinguish hoods but no faces. The path was too narrow for the dwarves to double back and come closer.

"For Mahal's sake!" I heard Dori bellow. "What's going on?!"

Dori's shout seemed to shake Fili sufficiently as he half turned, his back to the rock, and shouted to be heard above the wind.

"Don't know. They're both alright but something happened. They fell I think."

Kili shook his head and looked above his shoulder to his brother. Yelling as well, he explained further.

"The wind's too strong. Amelia nearly fell. Nori barely caught her."

I heard several worried shouts, but nothing really distinguishable.

"We need to find shelter!" Fili added. "We won't be able to walk much longer in this storm uncle!"

The dwarves started to yell and shout between each other but I didn't pay them any attention.

I finally had the courage to turn my head and look at Nori.

I was currently straddling one of his legs. Luckily he had managed to twist his upper body in an odd way, and instead of falling to his death, had fallen back against the mountain. His back was probably hurting him quite a lot right now, considering the violence of the shock. Our faces were mere inches apart. His eyes were probably as wide as mine as our gazes finally met.

I felt his hold on my waist tightened almost painfully.

"I thought…" He breathed out before his voice broke.

Tears filled my eyes as a huge lump formed in my throat.

"Me too." I barely managed to squeak.

Uncaring of whom may see us, I hid my face against his neck and held onto him tightly. There was no way I would let him go right now. I thought I had lost him. Worse. I thought he was going to die because of me. I could feel his hands clutch tightly my coat. My heart was still beating at an unhealthy rhythm. I closed my eyes tightly and my grip on Nori seemed to strengthened some more. His hold on me was almost painful. He was crushing me against him but to be perfectly honest, it felt as if this wasn't nearly strong enough.

I finally let the tears run free on my cheeks.

I felt Nori's lips on my temple and realized he was trembling slightly too. Well, I was shaking like a leaf right then. As the thought of the recent events once more played in my head, I started to cry against him in earnest.

"Oh Mahal." I blurted out. "Oh Mahal, Nori I almost killed you. I almost killed you."

I felt him freeze for a second and this time I was quite certain he couldn't hold me closer or tighter to him.

"Sanmizim" He interrupted me, his lips moving close to my ear. "I'm fine. We're both alive." His words started to sooth me, or maybe it was his rumbling voice. "I'll protect you, whatever the cost."

I jolted a bit at this last part and leant back to look at his eyes.

"I forbid you to die for me." I hissed, sudden anger pushing away the fear.

Our gaze locked once again. We were glaring at each other right here and then. This really wasn't the right time or place but…well. Clearly that would be yet another topic we would have to discuss together.

The only good thing it did, was that for a minute the terror left me completely. Slowly I sat back and moved so that I wasn't straddling Nori anymore. I could honestly say that I had never felt so happy to feel cold, hard rock under my fingers. Still, one of my hands was still painfully crushed in one of Nori's. I didn't mind. My hold on him was quite tight too.

I had no idea how long we had been sitting there. Holding each other's hands and simply relishing the fact we were both alive.

At some point I felt a hand on my shoulder and I glanced up to see that Kili had knelt next to me. As soon as I looked his way I was crushed between his arms, against his chest, as he hugged me tightly too.

"Mahal, I'm glad you're alright." He half shouted in my ear.

I smiled at him, I didn't feel like screaming to be heard right now. Fili was just behind him and relief was evident in his eyes too. But the weather wasn't getting any better and we couldn't stay here forever so with an apologizing smile, the blond prince leant forward and yelled his uncle's orders at us.

"We're pressing forward. We'll try finding a place to stop soon."

I nodded to let him know I had heard.

Then Fili grabbed Kili's coat and helped his brother back up. The wind was more violent than ever. As the dwarves started to walk again I stood up too. My knees were shaking as I leant heavily against the rock, as far away from the precipice as possible. Behind me I could feel Nori was up too. His right hand was gripping the coat near my waist. Slowly, carefully I turned to face him one last time before we started back on the path.

As soon as I was looking at him I felt his lips crash on mine. This kiss wasn't sweet or tender. It wasn't passionate either. I could feel the fear and despair we had both experienced a few minutes before. I wasn't prepared for this reaction, but I welcomed it gladly. I panted heavily when he leant back.

"Be careful." He roughly said, his grey eyes darker than usual.

"You too, please." I half begged, my lips brushing against his before I kissed him quickly, more tenderly this time.

We both took a deep breath before I turned my back to him. I wasn't walking nearly as fast as I had been before. I wanted nothing more than to find shelter, stop somewhere and hold onto Nori until the remnants of fear left me completely.

I couldn't even start to explain how grateful I was to feel Nori's hand on my hip. My body was pressed against the rock as I walked not too far behind Kili. From time to time the younger dwarf would look above his shoulder, as if to check that both Nori and I were still there.

It took us around two more hours of walking under this awful storm before we finally found a place where to spend the night. It wasn't nearly as good as any of us had hoped. We wouldn't even be protected from the elements. We had just basically found a crossroad. The path became larger and separated in two and the area around the fork was flat and large enough for our group to sit against the mountain, far enough from the precipice. At least we wouldn't risk falling to our death that night. As soon as we were there, I saw two, no three, dwarves rushing in our direction.

For yet another time this day I was crushed against someone's chest. I welcomed the gesture and grabbed Dori's cloak in his back.

"What happened?" He half yelled above my shoulder.

"She slipped on unstable rocks." I heard Nori's voice answer above the wind.

My eyes met Ori's and I could tell that the dwarf had been anxious to see me. I extended one of my hands to him while I was still in Dori's protective hold. Just behind Ori I could see Balin. Ori grabbed my hand and took a step closer. He brought his other hand to my face, as if to verify that I was still alive. After a few more minutes, Dori finally let me go and I walked to Balin. Our forehead touched lightly for a second before he hugged me strongly.

Oddly enough it made me chuckle. My nerves were calm now.

"Be careful from now on." My second guardian said before patting my shoulders.

I nodded at him, glancing above his shoulder to see that most of the others, actually all of them, were looking at us. From then on I spent Mahal knew how long in the dwarves arms. It seemed all of them wanted to somehow make sure I was alright in one way or another. When I ended up facing the glowering Dwalin though, I was certain he would grunt some comments about me being stupid and useless. Instead he extended one hand and let it fall heavily on my shoulder.

"When you walk on unstable grounds," He grunted after leaning closer. "Don't put all your weight on your feet immediately. Be careful next time. Use your staff if you need to."

After those words he turned away and left me alone to face Thorin whose icy eyes stared at me. I did the only sensible thing that was to be done, I turned away and tried to forget the glare my leader was sending in my direction.

"Pay more attention next time." Thorin's gruff voice shouted at my back when I walked away.

I glanced above my shoulder and met his eyes. Carefully, I nodded. I wanted him to know that I was being serious. He nodded back and I was free to walk down the odd camp the dwarves were making, to join Nori, Dori and Ori again. I wanted nothing more than to cuddle near Nori right now. Still, I knew it would be almost impossible to do so if Dori decided that he wanted me to sit between him and Ori. The oldest brother had asked me to sleep between him and Ori several times already. I usually managed to shut my disappointment down, but I already knew that I wouldn't be able to. Not that night. Not after the events of the day. As weird as it seemed, I needed to be near Nori right now.

Thank Mahal, Bofur called my guardian more or less at the same time as I arrived near them, effectively distracting the dwarf. I had no idea whether this was luck or something else, but I didn't waste any time. Swiftly I walked to Nori and plopped down next to him. Our backs were against the mountainside. The wind and rain were still as strong as earlier and none of us would probably actually lie on the ground that night. No. Instead the dwarves sat close next to each others, back to the mountain, feet on the small rocky and slippery path, facing the precipice a few meters away.

There weren't many discussions that evening. Bombur passed down and up the line pieces of dried meat and that was all we ate for dinner.

Nori was at my right, sitting at the end of the line. Ori was at my left. I tried to keep my cloak close to me, my hood back on my head, but it didn't entirely protect me from the cold. I was glad for several reasons when I felt Nori snuggle closer to me. He pushed me a bit towards Ori and I was soon completely squished between the two of them. It felt as if I was a bit more protected from the cold, and somehow I felt a bit safer too. Most of all I let my head fall against Nori's and being so close to him was enough to make me feel better.

That night I doubted that any of us really slept well.

The cold and humidity around wasn't helping the cramps in my stomach. I knew as well that at some point during the day I would have to find a way to be a bit alone. Right now though, I tried my best to ignore any call of nature. I still had to walk a bit down the path at some point to try and get some illusion of intimacy. In my mind I once again thanked Mahal for the dwarves' sense of chivalry, if one could call it like that.

There was no breakfast except some humid bread that morning. The mood was rather gloomy, mirroring the weather. If I chanced a look down, I could see a heavy mist. Rain wasn't falling quite so hard that morning, and the wind seemed to have calmed down a bit too.

But that didn't matter much in the end.

We all walked rather silently. The only difference from the previous day was the order in which we were walking. Clearly, several dwarves wanted to keep an eye on me, so I was pushed up the line. Bofur winked at me and patted my shoulder when I passed him to join Balin and Dori further ahead. As they started to walk though, I waited aside a bit. After the previous day's events, there was just no way I would let Nori out of my sight.

I knew already I had a strong protective instinct when it came to Nori. I just hadn't realized quite how strong it was, maybe. It probably was silly of me to want to be able to see him. It wouldn't change our fate in the case one of us slipped to his death. It wouldn't change anything at all. It wouldn't protect either of us. Still. For the peace of my own mind, I needed to know he was nearby.

The start of our journey was rather slow that morning and Thorin was the first to actually leave, closely followed by Oin, Gloin and Balin. They had been discussing which way to follow for a short while. It was rather unsettling that they didn't seem to agree on which way to take. In the end they decided to follow the larger path. It felt as if they weren't actually sure this was the good way to follow but I chose not to think about it. Little by little we all started to walk. I ended up next to Nori at first. Fili and Kili were just behind us. The path was large enough for two of us to walk next to one another.

The wind wasn't as strong that day and as the hours passed, it seemed to die down a bit. The rain though didn't. Soon it turned back to the heavy downpour it had been the previous day. All too soon, Nori was obliged to step behind me as the path grew narrower once again. I forced my eyes to stay on either the path or the back of Bifur, who was just in front of me. Often I would feel Nori's hand on my waist or shoulder. Clearly he was at least as protective of me as I could be of him. I could even say he was worse than me.

The wind came back in the afternoon. Strong gusts would threaten to push us down the precipice. It felt as if I had forgotten what warmth felt like. Even with my long coat and my leather tunic protecting me from the rain, I still felt cold. It didn't help the vicious cramps in my lower abdomen. I had managed to get some privacy earlier, but I wasn't sure that the makeshift linen pad was a good idea. Actually it felt awful and I tried my best not to think of it. Using fresh bandages was the only thing I could think of, but it didn't make me comfortable. I kept silent about it my pain and discomfort though. There was no point in saying anything.

I was rather lost in my thoughts when a rumbling noise caught my attention.

I looked up to see that the grey clouds had turned into darker shades. I frowned. I really hoped that the noise I had just heard wasn't thunder. This would probably make our whole situation worse than it already was. The rumbling noise rolled again and my eyes trailed over the menacing clouds.

"Amelia, keep up."

I glanced above my shoulder at Nori. His hand was on my arm and I felt him lightly squeeze it.

"We shouldn't stay on this path if there's a thunderstorm." I half shouted at him.

"Nowhere else to go." He replied in a similar fashion, lightly pushing me.

I let my left hand trail on the wet rocks of the mountain side. My right hand was holding my hood tightly. Not ten minutes had passed when I heard a resounding crack. I jolted. Immediately Nori's hand tightened on me. Reflexively I pressed myself against the rock. I really didn't feel like going through a repeat of the previous day.

"Damn weather." I muttered under my breath as I looked up ahead.

My heart missed a beat when I saw Balin go dangerously close the precipice and pointing something further away in the valley. My eyes naturally tried to see what he was pointing at.

"What the…" I felt my eyes widened.

I could hear Balin yelling something. Bofur, slightly behind us, was shouting something too. I didn't pay attention to any of them.

This world was crazy.

There was no other way to actually put it. Crazy, scary, impossible… all those words had different meanings, but in the end the feeling they described was quite similar to me when I thought about the world I was currently living in.

While those thoughts crossed my mind, my eyes were riveted on giant, dark and rocky figures that were moving in the distance. They looked human. They had heads, arms, legs. They were moving. They were alive.

And they were playing…

Two of those creatures were throwing something at one another.

I saw one of them throw his head back and the deep, loud rumble I had heard before resonated in the air.

"Nori…" I could tell that my face was white as I blindly tried to reach for Nori behind me without actually looking at him.

I was immensely glad when he caught my hand.

"Stone giants" His disbelief was easily heard in his tone. "Stone giants…" He repeated.

Alright. At least now I could tell that this wasn't a common occurrence that I had somehow missed in the past two years. Stone giants. I was currently watching two stone giants.

They didn't seem to see us. And why would they? They were so impossibly tall compared to us that it was entirely logical that those creatures wouldn't pay any attention to what they could only perceive as insects.

Around the same time I saw one of them, the one who was further away, threw that thing quite strongly. I felt my blood freeze in my veins when the second giant didn't catch it, but simply diverted the thing.

As my heart seemed to stop, I watched what I now recognized as a huge rock come in our direction. Thorin shouted something. I felt Nori's arm encircle my waist as he all but threw me against the rock wall. My head violently hit the rock, but it didn't really matter. Not even a second later I could hear the rock crash against the mountain. I felt the tremor in the stone. And then rocks and stones rained on us.

My fingers were clutching at Nori's coat, keeping him as close to me as possible.

After what seemed an eternity but probably was only a few seconds, it calmed down. I opened my eyes, only then realizing that I had shut them tightly. I drew a sharp intake of breath. The two giants weren't playing anymore. They were fighting. As soon as I realized that, I felt the path tremble and shake under my feet.

"An earthquake now?!" I exclaimed, quite scared by the whole situation.

"Hold on!" Nori shouted, holding me tighter against him.

From above his shoulder I met Fili's eyes. The young dwarf's pupils were dilated. He was obviously as terrified as I was. As our gazes locked, a sudden determination burnt in the blond dwarf's eyes. As Kili turned to call his brother, I saw a huge gap starting to open between his feet from the edge of my vision.

"Kili!" I couldn't help but scream, holding tightly onto Nori.

I could only be a witness when Fili pushed his brother away from him. Our eyes met and there was no fear at this moment, only this cold determination as he broke our gaze to fix his eyes on his brother. I saw Kili stumble forward and just had the time to shout at Nori.

"Careful!"

I felt the dwarf brace himself, holding me against him, while Kili crashed on us. The younger dwarf was about to stagger backward when I managed to find enough courage to let go of Nori and grab Kili's collar. At this point, I was pretty sure than nothing could scare me more than I already was. How stupid of me. A few seconds after the gap between Fili and Kili opened, I felt the floor move under my feet. It was probably the single weirdest thing I ever felt. It wasn't an earthquake. It wasn't as if the whole earth was shaking and trembling. No. It felt as if I was standing on some platform that was being moved around.

As I craned my neck to look up, I finally understood why.

"What's going on?" I heard Kili shout.

"We're on one of those giants!" I yelled back as much to answer him as to actually try to convince myself I wasn't dreaming.

As the stone giant stood, he took a second to stabilize himself before he actually took a step forward. I didn't even try to stop myself from screaming. This was all too much.

"Brace yourself!" I heard someone shout from behind me.

"Amelia, get ready to run!" Nori yanked at my arms.

Adrenalin flooded my veins and I somehow found it in myself to nod at him and let him go. I grabbed his hand and his hold was painful. I could feel my bones being crushed in his much stronger hand. Then there was a shock that almost sent me flying in the precipice, but Nori was ready for it. I felt him yank my arm harshly while I felt Kili's two hands push me forward.

I felt my legs move. I felt myself jump forward as a gap was already starting to form between me and the rest of the group. I could tell Nori had jumped half a second before me. I knew that Kili was just behind me.

I felt it all.

I experienced it as if I wasn't the one controlling my body though.

Then reality seemed to crush on me at the same time as my foot touched the rock path. I stumbled forward and painfully fell after two steps as Kili crashed into me. Nori's hand hadn't let go of mine and the three of us fell in a tangle of limbs.

Kili was quick to go back to his feet though.

"Fili!" I heard him scream, pain evident in his voice.

"Ori…" I breathed out, looking at my side to see Nori's extremely pale face.

It didn't take long to know who was with us. We'd been separated from the others. They were still on the giant's leg. Fili, Ori, Bofur, Bombur, Dwalin and Bilbo were still on that thing.

Nori and I scrambled to our feet, hands still locked together. We didn't even take a second to breathe or anything, we just stood and imitated the other dwarves. Our gaze locked on the three stone giants who were now fighting and on our friends who were literally stuck in the middle of this battle.

"Oh Mahal." I whimpered, bringing my left hand up to my mouth.

We were powerless. We had to wait and witness the events. The giant on which our friends were was losing the fight. I honestly didn't care about the creature, but when it started to fall forward I wasn't the only one to cry in anguish. As one we all started to run forward in the direction where the giant was falling. The path was turning, hiding the mountain from us.

Still I saw our friends one last time before a resounding crash resonated in my bones and a violent shock made the rocks shake under my feet.

Thorin wasn't the only one to shout.

My heart seemed to stop for an instant.

Fili, Ori, Dwalin, Bofur, Bombur…they couldn't be dead, right? They couldn't die like this. They just couldn't. I could perform operations, I could amputate a limb, I could heal burns and stitch back wounds. But I couldn't save someone who was crushed between two stone walls. A loud whimper escaped my mouth.

Ori…

No, Mahal, please not him. Not Ori. Not my sweet, kind Ori. Not my brother. Please Mahal no. My heart seemed to be torn away from my chest as Thorin stopped just were the path turned.

Why did he stop? Were they all…

We all rushed forward, though I honestly didn't want to see my friends' bodies.

"They're fine! They're safe!" Thorin yelled back at us.

Oh dear Mahal, I could have kissed our king right now and then. We all pressed forward and Kili precipitated towards his brother. I finally let go of Nori's hand, but only to throw myself at Ori. I hugged him as tightly as I could, even though we were both on the ground and rain was still pouring on us. I wasn't aware of anything around us. I didn't care what else could happen as long as Ori, Dori and Nori were alive and safe. As long as we were all safe.

Then I heard Bofur's question about Bilbo. I glanced up and around, still clutching at Ori. But as Dori moved closer to hug both Ori and me I stopped paying attention to the other for a minute. I could tell, though I had no idea how or why, that Nori was standing just behind us. For a minute, just a minute, I closed my eyes and tried to dream that we were all safe in our house. I lost myself in this little fantasy for that one minute, and was rudely awakened when two hands grabbed my shoulders and forced me to let go of Ori.

"I'm fine Amee." Ori's voice finally broke through to me. "I'm fine. It's alright."

I realized only then that tears were mixing with rain on my cheeks. My hands were trembling slightly and I was shivering.

"I thought…"

"I'm fine." He placed one hand on my cheeks and smiled, though a bit hesitantly, at me.

"Come on Amelia, Ori, get up." Dori ordered us and I obeyed without thinking.

Nori helped me to my feet while Dori helped Ori. For a second I leant against my thief. I could tell he welcomed the contact as his lips softly pressed against my temple. It was over all too soon, but it had been enough for that minute to just give me back some strength. Ahead of us I saw Fili and Kili walk away.

"What's going on?" I asked and realized my voice was really weak and shaky.

"The lads are going to scout ahead." Balin replied.

"Let's hope they find some descent shelter." Dwalin groaned.

I was massively impressed at these dwarves. The recent events had shaken me really badly but they seemed pretty alright with everything. A glance around let me know that everyone was alright, though Bilbo seemed rather unwell. It probably had to do with his near death experience. I promised myself that if we found some proper shelter that night, I would try and speak with the hobbit though. I was pretty certain that after such an awful experience, he needed a friend to talk to.

We slowly started to walk up the path. We walked for maybe half an hour when Fili and Kili appeared and told us they had found a cave.

"Is it safe?" I heard Thorin ask them.

"It's dry, there's nothing in there." Fili shrugged. "Not even bones or fire remnants."

I could tell the dwarves were hesitating. I wasn't too sure why though. I turned a questioning glance to Nori who hadn't left my side since the episode with the giants.

"An unused cave in this area? It seems a bit odd." He told me, understanding my queries without me needing to voice them.

Clearly, even if it was something odd, the dwarves decided it was safe enough because we all started to follow a very narrow path up. We left the path we were on to more or less climb that mountain. It took us probably another half hour to finally arrive in front of some dark, yet dry, cave.

I wouldn't lie, I was glad to be away from the wind and rain for the night.

The dwarves looked around the place, went to the very back of it, and checked every dark corner. When I saw Bombur let his bag on the floor, I went in further and imitated him. Soon, Ori and Nori were placing their own bags on each side of mine and Dori was sitting on Ori's other side. I let myself fall next to my bag and sighed loudly. Rubbing my hands on my face I tried to make sense of what had just happened.

"You alright?" Nori's voice made me look up.

I just nodded at him, not entirely trusting my voice at this stage.

"Bofur you take the first watch. Then Nori, Dori, Bifur, Balin and I will take the last one. Everyone, try to sleep and rest, we leave at dawn." Thorin's voice was easy to hear now that the wind wasn't howling in my ears anymore.

Almost immediately, all the dwarves lied down. They only removed their coats, putting them to dry at the cave's entrance. I imitated them and lied on my back between Ori and Nori. My eyes were wide open though and I couldn't seem to find any sleep. I felt nervous, unsettled. At some point I decided that it would be better for me to just stand and do something. As I sat up, Nori's hand immediately shot up to grab my wrist.

His eyes opened immediately and he quirked an eyebrow.

I smiled to reassure him and leant a bit forward to whisper to him.

"I can't sleep. I'll just keep company to Bofur."

"You should sleep." He frowned.

I smiled and peered around. No one was looking at us. All the dwarves, except for Bofur, were actually sleeping and the artisan was currently looking outside, smoking his pipe.

Quickly I leant a bit further down and kissed Nori's nose.

"I'll be fine." I murmured against his lips before I quickly gave him a short peck.

I sat back up, but Nori didn't let go of my wrist immediately. I felt him draw a small circle on the thin skin just there and I smiled at him. I needed him to know I was fine. I was fine, but I just couldn't sleep. Not yet. Not after going through so many strong emotions. Slowly he released his hold on my wrist but let his fingers skim over my skin until he held mine. Ever so slowly, his eyes never leaving mine, he kissed my knuckles, letting his lips linger for a second. I felt my skin tingle as my smile grew wider on my lips.

After a short moment though he let go of my hand completely and I softly squeezed his arm before I stood up. I didn't bother to take my coat or anything with me. I had no intention of going outside where the rain was still falling, so my backpack could be left behind.

Bofur looked up when I came closer to him. He was holding his pipe in his right hand and slowly puffed out a ring of smoke before he smiled at me.

"Everything alright?" His voice was just above a whisper.

I walked to his right side and sat in the small corner between him and the rocks.

"Yeah." I replied, keeping my voice low. "Just can't sleep."

He nodded and offered me his pipe. I smiled at him and shook my head. They knew I didn't want to smoke, but that was a sweet gesture nonetheless.

"Do you think we'll see more of them?" I couldn't help but ask.

Bofur hummed and placed his pipe back in his mouth.

"Nah. It's pretty lucky we even got to see them."

I almost choked when I heard his reply. I couldn't believe the words I had just heard. It was simply way too weird. Especially considering where he had been during the whole event.

"Lucky?" I breathed out. "You can't be serious. We almost died."

"Bah…that happens often." He winked at me then. "That we almost die I mean."

"Right." I snorted. "It's just a question of habit, right?"

"Exactly." He nodded to emphasize his word.

I couldn't help it. I chuckled lightly. He was smiling at me when I glanced at him. I could always count on Bofur when I was in a bad mood and needed someone to cheer me up a bit. Bofur almost always seemed cheerful. He also seemed to know when someone could be teased, and when he needed some support.

"How do you do it?" I blurted out without thinking.

"Do what?" He frowned, clearly surprised by my question.

"Well," I licked my lip, trying to find a way to word this question. "How can you almost always be so cheerful?"

He offered me a kind smile. It wasn't one of his cheeky smirks. It was a genuine smile. I realized then, that maybe it wasn't so surprising that this dwarf and Nori were such good friends.

"Life is hard enough. Smiling doesn't cost me much, and it helps make life easier." He shrugged before glancing at me. "Don't you think?"

"You're wise Bofur." I smiled at him.

"Nah. I just don't like conflicts. I'd rather smile than fight."

That surprised me a bit though. I looked at him from the corner of my eyes. I could tell that there was something more. As I was about to ask him another question, a noise caught both our attention in the cave. We both looked to see that Bifur was grumbling and moving quite a lot in his sleep. For a few seconds I held my breath. I knew that Bifur suffered from nightmares too. I knew he could very well grab his weapons and start attacking phantoms in his sleep. In such a crowded space, this could turn rather ugly quite quickly. Luckily after some more grumbles, Bifur settled back and soon started to snore again.

Bofur's eyes stayed on his cousin for a short while more.

After a few minutes of silence I whispered as lowly as I could.

"It's for him, right?"

Bofur didn't reply at first. To be honest, he didn't really need to. I knew I was right. Bofur probably tried his best to always be cheerful to appease his cousin. There surely were other reasons, and I knew he hadn't lied to me earlier.

He sighed and I looked at him again.

"He needs peace."

I nodded. Bofur truly was an honourable dwarf. He probably was one of the best friends someone could hope to have.

"He's not the only one." I whispered, looking at my hands.

"No he's not." Bofur agreed.

Bofur was naturally cheerful. It was obvious he didn't force himself to be like this. But he did make his best to help people feel the same way he did. Out of nowhere a thought crossed my mind; I truly was glad that I had been lucky enough to meet him. People who genuinely tried to make other smile weren't really numerous. Bofur was like that.

After that we remained silent for quite a while. Even though I wasn't asleep, I was able to rest. I was watching the rain fall outside, its noise soothing me. Actually, the soft noise of the rain, added to the smell of Bofur's pipe, managed to calm me enough that I started to doze off a bit. I wasn't near to fall asleep, but it was close enough.

I startled slightly when Bofur suddenly vanished from my side.

He hadn't so much vanished as he had simply jumped to his feet. It took me a few seconds to understand why. I could already hear Dwalin growling at me that my reactions were too slow. Quickly I stood up too and walked where he now stood, near the entrance of the cave, facing Bilbo.

"What's going on?" I asked in a whisper.

That space wasn't really big, so I had to stay on Bofur's right, facing Bilbo. As I felt the wind I shivered slightly and both the Hobbit and dwarf took a step further inside the cave, allowing me to follow them and not feel the cold so harshly.

"Bilbo's leaving us." Bofur replied before the hobbit could.

"What?" I immediately looked at Bilbo, barely managing not to be loud. "Why?"

"I am not welcome here." Bilbo said with conviction, though I could tell he was a bit sad too.

"What are you talking about?" I frowned. "Of course you are."

If I had to be entirely honest, I knew he wasn't really. The dwarves hadn't be very welcoming with him, though recently Fili, Kili, Ori and Bofur had started to warm up to the hobbit. Still, most of the others weren't exactly friendly. To be fair though, they weren't exactly what one could call an overly friendly bunch. They were warriors. They were dwarves. They had been through a lot and those experiences had hardened them to an almost impossible extent. It wasn't surprising that Bilbo had trouble seeing the good in them, they weren't showing it easily.

"Bilbo, you're just a bit homesick." I said and saw Bofur cringe. "What?" I asked the dwarf this time.

"I said the same. You won't like the answer." Bofur shrugged.

I glanced at Bilbo who sighed heavily and shook his head.

"I'm sorry." He said softly. "I didn't mean it. I …"

"What's that?" Bofur cut in, pointing at Bilbo's side.

"Wow!" This time I couldn't help but speak aloud. "How do you do that?"

I heard someone jolt and saw Thorin sit up from the corner of my eye. Did this dwarf ever sleep peacefully? I hadn't spoken so loudly. Before I could ponder more on this topic, Bilbo caught the hilt of his dagger and unsheathed the blade. It was shining. I was in awe. I honestly was. I had seen this blade before, it was pretty but normal metal. Or so I had thought. Right now it was surrounded by a clear bluish hallow. I extended my hand and softly touched the metal. It was still cold.

I looked at the hobbit, my mouth already open to ask him how he managed to do that when Thorin's voice bellowed from behind us.

"Orcs! Everybody, wake up! We're under attack!"

As soon as these words were pronounced, I startled and my hands went almost automatically to the hilts of my daggers. My eyes immediately went towards the three brothers. Nori was already sitting up and I saw his hand go to where I should be lying. As he only grasped air, I saw him look fervently up and around until our eyes met.

I was about to go in his direction when we heard a grinding noise. There was a slight tremor in the rock and I froze. My body and my mind remembered all too well the events of this day. I could only hope we weren't currently sleeping in a stone giant's mouth. The dwarves were all sitting up or some of them were already standing when all our eyes went to the ground in the middle of the cave.

A long fissure appeared in the middle, slowly broadening.

"What's going on?" I heard Ori whisper just as I looked up at Nori.

I saw him make a step forward in my direction as I felt a large hand grab me by the collar. Just as the floor suddenly gave under my feet, I was violently thrown out of the cave. I only had the time to see Bofur from the corner of my eyes before I staggered backwards into the open path.

"Nori!" I couldn't help but shout as I was thrown outside.

Rain and wind were still going strong outside the cave but I couldn't care less at that very moment.

Destabilized by Bofur's powerful throw, I tried to regain my balance in vain. Stumbling backwards, my left feet caught a stone and my whole body tilted. My arms flailed uselessly around and I felt myself fall. My back hit the rocks painfully and I started to roll for a few meters. The pain in my bones was completely inconsequential as I knew perfectly well that I was going straight toward the precipice. The steep slope next to the path was too short.

My hands were trying to stop me by grabbing any stone they touched.

I felt my heart stop as I suddenly felt that my feet weren't touching any ground anymore. For a second that seemed to last ages, I earnestly thought I was going to fall to my death. My fingers were clawing the rocks as my momentum forced the rest of my body to follow my legs over the edge.

I screamed.

It was only because my tunic got caught on the edge that I slowed enough to grab stones around. The dark rock was cutting my palms and the edge of the path was digging painfully in my collar bone.

Time seemed suspended for a minute as my whole body was dangling in the precipice. My fingers were clutching at a small crack on the rock alongside the slope that bordered the edge.

I tried to heave myself up, using just the force in my arms, but my muscles were too stretched right now and the sharp stone dig and cut my fingers.

"Nori!" I shouted.

The wind was howling in my ears. The rain was whipping my face.

Fear grew viciously in my stomach.

Where were my friends? Were they fighting? Why had Bofur done that? How could I get out of this situation? Where was Nori?

"Nori!" I tried again to heave myself to no avail. "Anyone!" Despair was easy to spot in my voice.

I felt my feet scramble on the wet, slippery stone. I couldn't find any crack in the stone to step on. Each wiggle and move I made sent tendrils of pain in my arms as my own weight was already tiring my muscle. I could feel that I wouldn't hold long like this. As no one came and no noise except the wind could reach my ears, I realized that I was alone.

I was truly alone.

I couldn't hear the dwarves' war cries and I knew that if they were fighting, I would have heard something. Something wasn't right.

I didn't want to die right now, and certainly not like that.

Where were the dwarves? Were they in danger?

As my muscles were starting to shake a bit under the strain, I stopped moving. Several images went through my head. I could see myself dying. I could see the dwarves' dead bodies lying around in the cave.

There was no way I would let any of that happen. Not after all the problems and troubles I had already gone through. Not now that I had just found out that Nori loved me. Not when we hadn't reached that bloody mountain yet.

Hell no!

I wouldn't have been able to explain what happened right then. Renewed strength flooded in my body. I was determined to live through this.

I ignored the pain when the sharp stone cut my bloodied hands deeper. I somehow managed to use some leverage with my left foot and used all my strength to kick myself upwards. As my body jolted upwards I let go of the sharp edge I had been holding on. My hands shot forwards and grabbed another rock. I shouted as I crawled on the rock, the sharp edge digging painfully in my breasts, then belly and stomach. I had to stop for a second. I was out of breath. My upper body was now lying on the steep slope. My waist and legs were still dangling in the precipice but this time I managed to throw my right feet up and caught the edge with my heel.

I saw another sharp rock a bit further away and I used my upper body strength to heave myself a bit. I caught the stone with my left hand and then used my right leg to go further up. Little by little I managed to climb the slope. It took me an enormous amount of energy but I couldn't feel secure and relieved until I would be on the path, or better yet, somewhere safe with the dwarves.

Once my whole body was lying on the relatively flat surface of the path, I remained motionless for a long, very long minute. I was breathing heavily. Painfully I pushed myself so that I was lying on my back. I groaned as I did so. I didn't need to look to know that most of my upper body would be black and blue. I winced as I tried to take a deep breath but only felt a sharp pain from my upper torso. I could only hope no bones were broken. I would have to tell a few things to Bofur.

When I thought of him, I winced once more. Now that I could actually concentrate, I could tell that there was no way the dwarves were still around. There was no noise. Nothing. Either they were gone…or they were all dead. I had no idea where they could have gone to, but I wouldn't believe them to be dead until I saw their bodies lying cold on the ground.

I found enough energy to actually sit up. My whole body protested as I did so. Pain shot from my torso and arms. I had to use my hands as I just couldn't sit up without using my arms as support. I swallowed back a whine when I felt the burnt from cuts being rubbed on the ground. Only the thought of my friends and kin managed to give me enough strength to kneel. It was hard to breath and I shakily brought a hand to my chest. I swallowed thickly before pressing on my ribs lightly.

I winced. That hurt. Still on my knees I managed to half crawl to the cave's entrance. Using the rock on the side I got up on my legs. I needed a break, but instead I took a deep, painful breath and walked in.

I stumbled a bit at first, but the sight of the empty cave was enough to make me forget about pain.

I staggered in, looking around. There was nothing left here, no cloaks, no bags and definitely no dwarves. No one was there. It was as if no one had ever been there. Somehow, I felt a hollow emptiness grew in my chest.

"Nori?" I squeaked in a whisper.

Tears started to cloud my eyes. Quickly I rubbed them away. Walking further in, I cleared my throat.

"Nori? Dori?" I called, though I didn't dare shout. "Ori? Bofur? Nori! Nori!"

I was pretty sure that I felt what a lost puppy felt right then. Where were my friends?

How could it be possible that they would all disappear like that in a minute? Where could they have gone? How? Mahal…I needed help right now. I needed a sign of some sort. Helplessly I started to walk to the centre of the cave. I went to the back and pressed my bloodied hands on the wall. Maybe…maybe it was like in the movies I had enjoyed watching in the past. Maybe there was a door? Maybe there would be something to activate a mechanism of some sort?

I was grasping at straws. I knew that. But hope was the only thing I seemed to have left. Well, hope and my twin daggers. I felt a lump grow in my throat. Nori had given me…I pushed those thoughts at the back of my mind. I couldn't let it distract me. I needed to find them. Bofur wouldn't have pushed me away if he hadn't a good reason for it. Thorin had thought we were under attack. And now that I was calming down a bit, I could remember the gap in the ground.

As soon as the image of the fissure came back to me, I dropped to my knees and started to brush the ground. There should be some way to feel it. Rocks weren't supposed to open and close that way unless they were made to. I couldn't see anything though, and much less feel anything. The only thing I did manage to do was to bleed all over the place. I glanced at my palms and winced at the sight. It wasn't pretty. I didn't have the time to care for that right now. I bit my lower lip and painfully got back up. Crawling around was pointless. If this ground opened, then it meant that there was indeed a mechanism somewhere. I just had no idea where to look for it.

Was it some sort of trap? A weird door?

As I was musing on those thoughts I heard once more the same odd, grinding noise. The only difference compared to earlier was that it wasn't quite so strong. I glanced down and wasn't surprised to see that the fissure didn't appear in the ground.

My heart rate started to rise.

Slowly, trying my best not to make too much noise, I unsheathed both my daggers.

I was looking around me, trying to spot where the noise was coming from.

It came at me from the back of the cave. It was just a blur at first. If I hadn't been trained by Nori, Dwalin, Bifur and Gloin, I would never have been able to dodge the thing that had jumped in my direction.

I sidestepped and jumped to get my back to the wall. My eyes followed the creature. Its aspect was nothing short of repelling. It was short. Probably shorter than me. Its skin was almost white with pustules on its face. His ears and his nose were pointy. It actually snarled at me and I brought my guard up. I followed its movements, mirroring them while still trying not to turn my back to the direction where that thing had come from. More could follow. This wasn't a cheerful thought. Luckily, I didn't have to think about this too much as the thing attacked me.

My training had clearly been efficient as my body took over my brain. Any thoughts that weren't related to the fight simply vanished from my mind.

The thing was wielding a short blade that looked rusty. I really had no intention of being cut by this. I was pretty sure nothing would save me from the infection that was sure to follow. I winced when my blade parried the rusty one. The creature wasn't that strong, but the shock still sent tendrils of pain through my cut palms, up my arms and in my ribs. I grinded my teeth and used my right hand to attack while I diverted his blade with the left one. To my surprise I managed to cut its shoulder and the creature snarled and squeaked some more.

Then it jumped at me, its arms extended over its head, clearly hoping to stab me. Instead of stepping back I too jumped forward. Meeting the creature halfway. My left arm was up and easily parried the blade while I stabbed it in the chest in an upward strike. The thing blinked at me and gurgled something before it slid to the ground.

I was panting heavily as I looked at it. It had fallen on the floor like a disarticulated puppet. I realized only then that it was barely wearing anything. Dark blood oozed from the wound on its chest. I wouldn't perform any autopsy, but I was quite certain I had cut through to its heart…or at least not too far from it. At any rate it was dead now.

I took yet another deep breath. Pain was still there, but I had somehow managed to push it to the back of my mind. Right now I knew just one thing, maybe I would find my friends back.

I slowly walked to the darkest area from the cave. I was being cautious. I couldn't believe that just one of those creatures could possibly capture all the dwarves. There had to be more of them. This one had seemed pretty weak too. It wasn't as if it had been difficult for me to beat it. This more than anything else, was a sure sign that there had to be quite a number of them down there. How could the dwarves, who were undoubtedly much stronger than me, be captured by this weak creature only? So I had to be extremely cautious. I had no idea what I would find. Glancing back at the dead thing, I could only be sure of one thing, whatever it was that would be hidden under this mountain, it wouldn't be pretty or friendly.

As I stepped further in the darkness I realized that the cave seemed bigger now. Walking in further, I found out that there was now an opening in the back. The rocks were split and opened on a dark corridor. My eyes were getting used to the darkness, so I could discern a bit more. Still, there was no way I would be able to see anything if I went in this direction.

I didn't have much choice though, and there would be some light at some point. I had to believe in that, otherwise there was no way I would find my friends. I didn't even have anything that would allow me to light, or even make, a torch. Now wasn't the good time to miss electric torchlight, I still did though.

Swallowing thickly I stepped in the shadows of the corridor. With my left hand still holding on my dagger, I brushed the wall with my knuckles. At least I wouldn't walk into it.

It took me one more second to find it in me to actually step forward. The thought of my friends being somewhere down there was enough to give me courage and strength. Still, I walked in on shaky legs. After a few steps with nothing happening to me, my fears calmed down a bit. I couldn't ignore the fact that pretty much every time I had been alone in dark caves, something bad had happened. I couldn't tell how long I had been walking in this long, stone corridor. The one thing I knew was that it was going down. The air was hot and stale too. It smelt bad. The darkness was encompassing everything. I wasn't even sure I was walking in a corridor, maybe I was in a cave, maybe in some sort of room; I had simply no idea. Uneasiness and fear grew steadily in the pit of my stomach. I had to clench my fists and wince in pain in order to keep my thoughts in check. Otherwise I would soon be a shaking fool, trembling in a heap on the ground. After what seemed like ages though, even the pain couldn't really keep the fear at bay. I was getting really anxious when my eyes distinguished a shimmering light further away.

Two contradicting thoughts crossed my mind in a second.

Light was a good thing, supposedly. It would bring me to my friends. But I could still remember the time I had followed a light while walking in a dark cave. It couldn't be the same though. That elf lord had said that I couldn't go back. The old man whose name I had currently forgotten too, had said the same thing. Surely I could follow this light without risking going back to my old world? I didn't want to go back to my birthplace. I wanted to stay here. I wanted to find Nori and the others, take back their mountain, and live my life here. I wanted to live with Nori, and with Dori and Ori not too far away from us. Oh Mahal couldn't be so cruel. Tears were welling up in my eyes as I saw the shimmering light come closer to me.

It was probably my fear talking more than my brain. Still I swallowed painfully as my body froze.

My heart started to beat wildly. I didn't want to be torn away from the dwarves.

Please, Mahal, please… I didn't want to be torn away from my home.

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><p><strong>AN: Hi everyone. Thank you all for the reviews. I know I'm repeating myself, but it's always an amazing feeling to receive your encouragement. It lets me know I'm not writing this story just for myself. :) So thanks a lot and welcome to the few new readers.**

**I hope you enjoyed this chapter, I know it's late, but I honestly had trouble writing this month. It's been better these past days, but I had two weeks with nothing but emptiness in my brain whenever I would try to write. Anyway...you all know what it is. Though no worries, I'm stubborn so writer's block won't keep me from finishing this story (though it does sometime slow me down). **

**Anyway sorry for the rambling. I hope you liked this chapter, we're going back to more serious topics in the story. I'll try and post one sometime during the next couple of weeks. **


	51. The Hunters and the Preys

**Everyone knows that everything belongs to Tolkien, except for the OC and the weird parts of the plot**

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><p>Fear crippled me and I just couldn't imagine myself living in my old world again. It was maybe a cruel thought, but I just couldn't accept the possibility of being torn from this place I had come to love. I was frozen on the spot until I realized that this time, instead of going away, the light was coming towards me. This was different. Somehow it reassured me. This light didn't seem so threatening anymore. And then I suddenly thought that it might not be such a good omen actually. After all, it might be another creature holding a torch.<p>

There wasn't much I could do at this precise moment anyway. Going back to the cave made no sense as the creature was clearly going that way. I could only prepare myself for another fight and hope it wasn't a troop of enemies coming up. I tightened my hold on my daggers and ignored the pain in my palms. Taking a deep calming breath, I positioned myself in a defensive stance. I squinted my eyes and, following common sense, avoided looking directly at the light. It would be stupid to blind myself and give such leverage to a potential threat. I only had to wait now.

My heart was beating steadily.

I wasn't afraid.

I was prepared, trained by some of the best warriors I knew. I wouldn't let them down. I would fight back whatever would appear in this corridor.

The first thing my eyes caught sight of, was a greyish material that brushed the ground. It belonged to a long grey robe I had seen several times already. As my eyes trailed upwards, I noticed the familiar beard, the frown on his face and finally his grey hat. I couldn't tell what I felt right then. This man had been bearing terrible news the last time I spoke to him. Still, he was more welcomed here than the creatures.

"You!" His frown deepened at my sight and then he spoke some more. "Where are the dwarves? Are they with you?" He wasn't talking loudly, but I could hear him clearly.

"No. They are somewhere down there." I replied in a low voice, pointing in the direction he had come from.

"How did you arrive here?"

I could have asked him the same question, but I understood that it wasn't the right time for that. My surprise at seeing him appear in those corridors would have to wait, I had the feeling that the dwarves might need us soon.

"Bofur pushed me out of the cave when the ground opened under them. When I managed to get back in, the ground was flat again, as if nothing had happened. Then there was this weird creature that attacked me, coming from some sort of hole or door in the back wall." I didn't say anything but I was pretty sure that the glance I sent his way was clear enough.

He grumbled and gestured for me to follow him. Turning back he started walking down again, all the while mumbling and grumbling. We were walking at a brisk pace. Now that I had light, I could see that the corridor had been carved rather clumsily into the rock. It was nothing like the perfectly carved ones that I had seen in the dwarves' Halls. The ground was uneven too. As I glanced up toward my unexpected companion, I realized that the soft white light was coming from his staff. I felt my eyes widen, how could light come from there? I barely managed to stop myself from actually asking him, and caught one of the things he was grumbling.

"Those damn dwarves. They were supposed to wait for me before going in the mountains. They are riddled with goblins."

"Goblins? That's what they are." I whispered to myself.

The old man glanced at me then and nodded. This kind of information was puzzling, though in retrospect it made some sort of bizarre sense. If this world had dwarves, elves, hobbits, orcs and stone giants, then it seemed oddly normal that goblins existed too. I pulled a face, my brain only now grasping all the possibilities that were still left. I had never been such a fan of fantasy back in my old world, but even I knew that there were many more types of creature that could exist. It made me shiver. I wasn't sure I wanted to meet any of those other species.

Those thoughts occupied my mind a bit, distracting me from my other worries. I had no idea how long we walked but at some point we arrived at an intersection. One way was going up, the other, further down.

"I know ways under the mountain." The wizard said, pointing at the path going up. "I was planning to catch up with you all this way after I realized that Thorin hadn't waited for me." He explained calmly. "But now we have to go down to a place I had hoped to avoid."

Instead of going the way he had pointed at, he turned right and I followed him without asking any question.

"What place?" I frowned, trotting next to him to follow his long strides.

He didn't answer at first and we walked in silence for several long minutes. At some point though, I heard some noise ahead and frowned. Now I could easily see some light at the end of the tunnel. Wordlessly, the old man slowed down and I instinctively imitated him.

"Goblin Town." He groaned before stopping me with his arm.

Cautiously he walked to the end of the tunnel and I followed. The noise I heard was clearly the unintelligible mass of many voices that cheered and shouted. They were really loud and I could tell that the crowd we were about to face was incredibly huge. As we both glanced around, I was glad to see that no creatures seemed to be on the platform on which we arrived. Said platform was made of wood, but I honestly hesitated stepping on it. It didn't seem like it was a sound structure. I was slightly afraid that the whole thing would topple down if I put a toe on it.

The old wizard had no such qualms.

He didn't even slow down when he stepped on the thing.

Sighing, I didn't hesitate anymore and followed him.

As I looked around and took in the sight of the place he had called Goblin Town, I felt my stomach knot. Everywhere my eyes could see, similar structures to the one I was standing on were crowded with those disgusting creatures. A town. A whole underground city populated with goblins, that was what Goblin Town was. I couldn't even hope to fight off these things. Now though it made sense that the dwarves would have been taken away. They couldn't possibly fight such a crowd.

A graveling voice resonated in the huge cave and my eyes tried to locate it.

A painful pang surged in my heart as I finally saw my friends.

They were gathered and crowded by goblins on a platform further away from where we stood. They were facing a huge, ugly creature that was wearing some sort of weird crown. Further away, I saw some goblins who were carrying frightening constructions made of metal and wood. My stomach lurched when the fat and huge goblin pointed at one of my friends and ordered him to be tortured. The dwarves immediately started to protest and were trying to fight back. I was about to say something when I realized that the wizard was swiftly going further down on the wood platform. Quickly I caught up with him.

I wasn't looking at my friends anymore, my gaze focused on the rotten wood under my feet. I was concentrating to try and avoid the weaker looking planks. No one needed me to fall to my death right now. I wasn't paying much attention to the cheers and shouts around at that time.

Then a booming voice made me look at the dwarves again.

"Kill them all!" The creature shouted.

To my utter horror I saw the goblins starting to attack the dwarves, using whips and spears against them. My voice was lost for a second as I could only witness the events from afar. I was about to react when the wizard stopped me from jumping forward with his staff.

"Close your eyes and be ready to fight." He ordered me before joining his staff and sword in front of him.

I didn't even question it. I obeyed.

I shut my eyes as tightly as possible while I heard him mumble some sentence in a foreign language. Not a second later, and even with my eyes closed, I could tell that a very bright light had exploded in the cave. I felt some sort of wave try to push me down but I somehow managed to stay on my feet.

"Stand up!" The wizard yelled. "Fight back!"

I opened my eyes immediately to see him rushing towards a narrow wooden bridge.

"Follow me!" He ordered me once more.

Immediately I ran after him. My heart was pounding in my chest. Adrenaline was rushing in my veins. I told my brain not to pay any attention to the fact that the bridge was dangerously bouncing under my feet. I focused on following the wizard. I ignored the dark emptiness that would welcome me if I took one wrong step. As soon as we reached another platform, goblins seemed to pop out from everywhere around us.

My body reacted.

My right arm shot forward as one creature was about to attack the wizard. I sliced the side of its throat just before I had to duck under a rusty blade. I kicked another goblin that squealed as my feet hit its knee. Without pausing I stabbed it in the chest and whirled around to slice at another one that was coming in my back.

I was already getting separated from the wizard. He was further down, on another bridge, and I was still fighting off those stupid, ugly things.

"Follow me!" He shouted again from above his shoulder.

"I'm trying to!" I mumbled under my breath as I pushed a goblin away from me and jumped on the shaky bridge.

I sent a short prayer to Mahal as I ran on the wooden planks that seemed ready to fall at each step I took. Ahead I could see that the wizard was being crowded by goblins. I didn't even think, I pressed on and jumped on one of the goblins back, stabbing it with both blades in its neck. The creature's body cushioned my fall and I barely had the time to catch my breath, as I yanked my blades free from the corpse and stood back up. The wizard had gotten rid of the others and was already running towards another platform. From the corner of my eyes, I registered that the dwarves were currently running in the direction of that same platform.

I rushed.

If anyone had asked, I wouldn't have been able to tell how I actually managed to reach the platform so quickly. As I stepped on it, I tried to slow down, but ended up colliding with Bifur who grunted and pushed me behind him before slicing through a goblin with his spear.

"Amelia!" I heard before large hands grabbed my shoulder and pushed me sideways.

A rusty blade swished near my face and was stopped by a definitely dwarvish axe.

"Careful!" Another voice, Dwalin's probably, shouted before painfully squeezing my arm. "Keep up." He ordered me and I nodded.

I was with the dwarves. I was safe.

In a matter of seconds I found myself completely surrounded by my friends as we ran behind the wizard. From then on, only a few goblins actually managed to approach me close enough for me to slice them. All of those who succeeding in passing through the dwarves' protective wall were already quite wounded by the time I ended them.

Everything was a blur.

I could somehow tell that Kili was running next to the wizard, Dwalin not far behind him. Dori was next to me and Ori was just behind him. The kind dwarf was holding his own quite well. My eyes scanned the crowd around me. Bofur, Bombur, Oin and Gloin were easy to spot. I could see Thorin and not far from him the blond head of Fili was easily noticeable. My heart was beating at an incredible speed and for a second I was terrified that I couldn't find Nori. I was about to stop when a hand pressed between my shoulder blades.

"Keep running!"

My heart did a somersault in my chest. Nori was alive. He was behind me. Immediately I caught back with the others. I wasn't really paying any attention to where we were going or what was happening. I was busy trying to keep up with the dwarves and they were busy eradicating the goblins that came too close to their weapons.

"This way!" the wizard shouted and ducked in a dark tunnel.

The dwarves didn't hesitate to follow him. Dwalin and Bifur though stayed at the entrance, fighting off the remaining goblins while we rushed past them.

"We can't…" I started to complain, not wanting to leave them behind when Nori cut in.

"They're right behind us."

The tunnel was narrow, its ceiling quite low, and only the wizard's staff provided light as we rushed in the dark. We turned into another, similar one, before we ran into a larger path. We had been running for quite awhile. I wasn't going to say it out loud, but I was reaching my limit. The pain I had tried to forget was making itself known once again. My arms and legs were burning. Each breath I took was difficult and strained my chest. My hands were burning as I tightened my hold on my daggers, only because I felt my fingers starting to shake and was afraid to lose my weapons.

"Light!" "Daylight!" Several voices shouted and I looked up.

Indeed, not too far from where we were, I could see daylight stream in the corridor. We would soon leave the mountain's tunnels. We kept running as we exited the long cave. For a second I was blinded by the sun. I stopped and looked at the sky. It was mid morning, we had spent hours in those tunnels. Quickly I sheathed my weapons back in their small scabbards and was about to bend in two to try and catch my breath.

I didn't have the time to do it though.

"Keep running." Nori grabbed my wrist. "We need to go as far as possible."

I let him drag me down the mountain side. The slope wasn't too steep, but it was still quite stupid of us to run like that. Any of us could have fallen and broken his neck. We kept running for several hundreds of metres, until we reached some dry bushes and where finally under the cover of some pine trees. Only then did the dwarves slow down a bit, but we kept trotting further into the pines' forest.

I wouldn't lie.

I was glad when we finally stopped.

I was out of breath. I couldn't take any deep inhale, it hurt way too much. I was panting like a dog, taking small gulps of air. As we had all stopped I felt two arms engulf me in a tight hug.

"Ouch!" I yelped and winced while the arms immediately let me go.

"Amelia, are you hurt?" Dori asked me, his hands on my shoulders.

I wanted to reply but had trouble finding enough oxygen to do so.

"There's blood on your coat!" Ori exclaimed.

"I'm fine." I stammered between gulps of air.

"You're hurt." Nori groaned behind me. "What happened?"

Taking a few steps, I pressed my back against a tree bark and let myself slide to the ground. I could see most of the dwarves around. A few metres away, the wizard was talking with Balin and Thorin. I saw that Fili was checking that Kili wasn't injured, while Kili was doing the same with his older brother. Bofur and Bifur were sitting near Bombur. Dwalin, Gloin and Oin were already going toward Thorin. It was only when Nori repeated his question that I realized I hadn't answered yet.

Before I could, Bofur spoke up.

"How did you get in the cave? I pushed you out before we fell in that stupid trap." He seemed genuinely surprised and concern was obvious in his eyes as he looked at my battered state.

I closed my eyes for a second and sighed when Dori asked once more how I had gotten myself hurt. Tiredly I opened my eyes again before closing them almost immediately.

"I fell down the slope when Bofur threw me out."

I hadn't spoken loudly. I hadn't even thought about what I was saying. I was too tired to think properly and pain was all my brain could think of right then. As a heavy silence fell though, I found myself opening my eyes again. I blinked several time until I realized that almost all the dwarves who were close enough to hear me were either looking at me with horror painted on their faces, or glaring at Bofur. The poor Bofur was looking at me with wide, frightened eyes. His face was paler than usual.

Immediately I realized my mistake, but it was too late.

I was too tired to deal with the dwarves' over protectiveness right now.

"Amelia, I…" Bofur started but I stopped him by holding my hand up.

"It's fine." I said as I heard several gasps.

In an instant, Nori was holding my hand, looking at my palms. I felt a soft tingle going up my arm when his warm fingers closed around my wrists.

"Why didn't you wear your gloves?" He asked me, his eyes boring into mine.

"I…"

Dori and Ori soon encircled me too. They didn't have a chance to say anything though as Thorin called us all. Nori helped me stand back up and I bit back a groan when I put my sore muscles to use. The pain in my chest hadn't receded at all and the move only seemed to worsen it.

"We have to get going. I want us to be as far away as possible by nightfall." Our king said. "This place will be crawling with goblins."

The wizard and several dwarves nodded. I sighed and was about to start walking when the old wizard's voice stopped us all.

"Where's Bilbo?" He looked around, frowning. "Where is our hobbit?"

As I heard his question I immediately started looking around, realizing just then that I couldn't see the little man.

"When did you last see him?" The wizard asked once more.

"In the cave, before we fell." Bofur replied instantly.

The dwarves were all looking around and at each other. The hobbit was nowhere to be seen though.

"I saw him when we were down there." Gloin grumbled. "He was with us before the goblins arrived."

"I saw him too when we were being dragged away." Kili added.

"He sneaked away at that time." Nori calmly said.

There was a short silence before all eyes turned toward the thief. I looked at him and Nori's eyes met mine for a second before he looked back at the others.

"And you're telling that just now?" Thorin groaned.

"What should I have done?" Nori shrugged. "Ask the goblins not to separate us from him?"

The dwarves suddenly all started to shout at one another, blaming whomever they could. The wizard was actually fighting with Thorin and I heard the king reply something close to "I am not responsible for your burglar."

I could feel a headache coming up behind my eyes when I cleared my throat and shouted, loud enough to catch the dwarves' attention.

"Oy! Bilbo is still in there!" Some of the dwarves looked at me as I spoke. "He's still in there!" I repeated louder and winced slightly when I moved a little too jerkily.

Silence once more settled on us.

"We need to do something." Kili spoke up, looking around at our companions.

"We are not going back into that mountain!" Thorin shouted loudly.

"But Bilbo needs us!" I exclaimed.

I couldn't believe that we would abandon him in that hell hole. The dwarves I knew and loved wouldn't do that. They were loyal. They weren't the kind of people who would abandon one of their own behind.

"That hobbit sneaked away, he escaped on his own." Thorin snarled. "He is probably half way back to his home."

I opened my mouth to contradict him when another voice spoke up from behind me.

"No, he's not."

We all whirled around to see Bilbo calmly coming out from behind some trees. He quickly joined us and we all looked at him in silence for a short moment. Then several shouts came up.

"Bilbo!" I exclaimed with a smile, glad to see him here.

"You got out!" Kili happily bounced towards the little hobbit.

"We thought you were lost in there." Fili added, smiling widely.

We were all more or less happy to see the little hobbit back with us. Well, at least I thought we were. It turned out that some dwarves were a bit surprised by Bilbo's appearance.

"Why are you here?" Thorin suddenly asked, his eyes narrowing on Bilbo. "Why did you come back? Why aren't you running home? Don't you miss your tea and books?"

I grimaced at the tone of his voice. Melancholy suddenly started to rise in my chest. I wasn't sad because of Bilbo. No. The hobbit was, in my opinion, rather lucky. What saddened me terribly though, was the pain I could see in Thorin's eyes. It reflected in most of the dwarves. They didn't have a home to go to. It seemed that a light appeared suddenly in my mind. Maybe this was partly why the older dwarves were a bit harsher with Bilbo. They envied him. The hobbit had a home. He didn't need to fight for it. He could very well abandon us all and go back to his home. Thorin wasn't so lucky. None of the dwarves were.

It clearly astonished them that a hobbit, who had a home, would miss the chance to run back there and would instead choose to follow our ruddy bunch to a faraway mountain. I felt as though Thorin really didn't want the hobbit to follow us. But maybe for the first time, I somehow had the idea I might just know what the king was thinking. Or, to be more precise, I knew what he felt. He couldn't believe that someone might willingly help them after all those years being on their own. No one helped the dwarves. That much I knew. So if no one helped the dwarves, why would a hobbit of all things choose to help us?

I looked up as Bilbo talked. I hadn't paid any attention to his tirade and only caught the end of it.

"I want to help you get your home back." Bilbo said with a surprising confidence.

I didn't know the hobbit had it in him to look like that. It made me smile, though I wasn't mocking him. I was glad that he was standing up for himself a bit more.

Thorin nodded and for a moment, we all stayed silent. Balin ended up being the voice of reason, which didn't really surprise me, and broke the peaceful silence with his calm comment.

"We shouldn't stay here. We need to go further away from the mountain before nightfall."

"Let's go." Thorin agreed and gestured for us all to follow him.

I barely managed not to whine. I really didn't feel like walking right now. Nori glanced at me. I saw him frown, concern evident in his eyes as he looked at me. He leant in my direction and I wanted nothing more than to let him hold me. I longed to be in his arms. I ached to feel his broad chest against my back. I wanted to feel his arms around my waist. I needed to feel… but right now it wasn't possible, not without advertising our feelings to everyone. I knew my eyes were shining with unshed tears as I shook my head slightly. His movement stopped immediately. Our gaze locked for a second and I could see that it pained him not to be closer to me. Our feelings were so similar in this instant.

But the dwarves were already leaving and we had to keep up.

"Amelia, are you alright?" Dori asked, forcing me to look at him. "Do you need help to walk?"

I honestly pondered before I answered. I took a few tentative steps before I actually replied negatively.

"I'll be fine."

"You sure?"

"Yes Dori." I nodded, though I actually wasn't. "Let's go or Thorin will have a fit."

Dori frowned but he turned away and, pushing Ori gently, started to trot behind the other dwarves. Nori gently took hold of my elbow and looked at me.

"If you need to stop, let me know." He whispered and I nodded.

Running had never been so painful and hard. Nori was silently, and rather discreetly, helping me. As time passed I ended up leaning on him quite a bit, up to the point that I just couldn't go without his support anymore. Gingerly he helped me place my right arm around his neck. I almost hissed in pain when he held my waist and started to walk again. I grimaced as my muscles protested the slightest movements I made. It wasn't comfortable to run like this. But I actually needed Nori's help.

We spent the whole day alternating between running at full speed and trotting. My eyes were riveted to the ground just before my feet. I was having trouble breathing and I felt light headed. I had no more energy. I ran because I had to, because I was already doing it, because at that moment I had forgotten how to do anything else. It was as if I couldn't do anything but that.

Dwarves had endurance. I couldn't compete with that. What little energy I had left was solely focused on keeping me moving.

When we finally stopped, I almost fell on the ground. Hadn't it been for Nori, I knew I would have. He was the only thing holding me up, because my legs were just not doing their job anymore. I felt as if I would never be able to breathe normally again. My eyesight was narrowed on a small central spot, all the rest seemed lost in a dark haze. I knew I needed water, food and rest. Right now.

"Alright, we'll stop here for now." Thorin said, he too was breathing heavily. "Do we still have food?" He asked.

"Did any of us manage to grab his pack?" Balin was clearly suffering from our forced run through the forest.

His question though highlighted yet another problem we would have to deal with. We didn't have any other equipment than the weapons and clothes we were carrying. Suddenly the fact that I wore my satchel under my leather coat seemed almost like a miracle. We all looked at each other rather helplessly. Our food and most of our equipment, including warm blankets and extra coats and weapons, were lost in Goblin Town.

"Alright." Thorin exhaled loudly. "What do we have?"

"Our weapons." Dwalin replied with a grunt.

"I lost a dagger." Fili grumbled while checking all his hidden pockets.

"I got my bow, but I only have a dozen arrows left." Kili commented, checking each of them. "And three need to be repaired." He frowned.

All around us the dwarves started to mumble and grumble, loudly complaining about all that was lost. Dori and Ori came closer to me and Nori. To my disappointment, the thief stepped away from me. I didn't say anything and remained where I was. I was exhausted. My body hurt. Thankfully, my legs at least weren't painful anymore. The heavy training I had gone through had made sure that I quickly felt better after I exercised. I forced myself to stretch my legs, trying my best to avoid getting stupid cramps. I didn't even listen to the dwarves. I was more bothered by the pain in my chest, arms and hands. At that moment, a painful cramp in my abdomen remembered me of my annoying situation. I felt dizzy. After a short while though, I could talk again. Not hesitating for a second, I cleared my throat and spoke up.

"I still…"

I couldn't say anything else as a howling sound came up in the distance.

We all looked in the direction where it had come from. My blood froze in my veins as another similar sound echoed from another location, then a third, and a fourth.

"Is that…" I looked uncertainly at Dori.

"Wargs." He breathed out.

"Run!" Thorin and the old man yelled at the same time.

We all bolted.

Sharp pain immediately pierced through my chest but I ignored it. I ran. I knew I had no other choice if I wanted to have a chance of survival. I had no idea what a warg was, but from the sound of it, it probably was something similar to a hound or a wolf. My last encounter with a wolf hadn't exactly been what one would call healthy. I was sprinting behind Bombur and Bofur when I saw the other stop abruptly. I struggled to avoid colliding violently with Bombur and lost my footing. I was about to fall when one hand grabbed my right arm, and another held my waist. I muffled a cry at the pain that shot through my upper body while Fili let go of my arm, and Kili cautiously helped me regain my balance.

I took a long shaky breath before I looked up. We had only run for about ten minutes, I didn't understand why we would stop now. Surely our leader hadn't suddenly decided to fight the pack hunting us. As my gaze trailed ahead, I soon realized the reason for our abrupt stop.

We had stupidly reached the edge of a cliff.

I looked around me. Nori wasn't too far ahead. Dori and Ori were nearby too. I was about to jog to them when the next order came up.

"Climb the trees!"

My eyes widened as I looked at one of the tall pine trees next to me. There was no way I would be able to climb that. Not with my hands as they were. Not with this crippling pain in my chest at every move I made. As Fili and Kili rushed past me, they each grabbed one of my arms and dragged me to the nearest tree. I hissed in pain because of the sudden move.

Fili easily jumped and climbed up to the lowest branch before he leant down. I looked at him stupidly just as I felt Kili squeeze my waist.

"Up you go Meli." Kili managed to sound both cheery and worried at the same time.

At these words I felt the young dwarf throw me upwards.

"Your hands!" Fili tore me out of my daze.

Between Fili grabbing my wrists, and Kili helping me by pushing on my feet, I soon found myself sitting on the lowest branch of the tree. In a matter of seconds, Kili was with us and Fili was already going further up. I was still rather dumbfounded by the whole event.

"Come Amelia." Fili said.

With the brothers' help, I managed to go up that tree. I was sitting on one of the branches not too far from them when the creatures appeared. These wargs were huge and a memory of our arrival to Rivendell came back to my mind. I shuddered as the beasts ran towards the trees and started to bark loudly, jumping as high as they could to try and bite us. I held onto the tree's trunk to keep my balance. It was as if a sudden chaos had erupted all around us.

From the corner of my eye I could see that the wargs were jumping dangerously close to where Kili was. The young dwarf was even trying to kick the animals.

"Kili!" I called. "Come here."

"The branch you're on isn't strong enough for us both." He replied, barely managing to keep his feet away from the warg's teeth.

"I'll go further up." I told him.

I swallowed hard. I really didn't feel like trying to climb anything right now. I was hurting all over, but more than that, those wargs were starting to properly terrify me. Fili was on a branch on the other side of the trunk, but slightly above me, I could reach another one.

"Be careful Amelia!" Fili frowned at me as I cautiously started to climb to that other branch.

"No kidding…" I muttered between my teeth as I concentrated.

I could feel sweat beads on my forehead. My hands were burning every time I would flex my fingers. I could only curse our bad luck. As I slowly managed to reach that third branch, I heard Kili start to climb upwards too. At least the three of us would be safe for a moment. I had no idea how we would get out of this situation without a bloody fight. Those animals would probably stay under the trees for awhile, and at some point we would have to go down.

I muttered a curse as pain rippled through my chest when I heaved myself up. A few tears gathered in my eyes but I ignored them. I clenched my teeth and managed to finally sit on the branch.

"You alright?" I heard Fili but I wasn't sure he was addressing me.

I closed my eyes and let my forehead rest against the trunk. Instead of trying to take a deep breath, I took several shallow ones. It was all I could do to limit the pain in my chest. I frowned. I knew I didn't have any broken ribs, but I was quite certain that I had bruised them. It should be alright after some rest. The only problem was that resting wasn't an option right now.

"Amelia?" Kili then asked after a few seconds.

His voice managed to reach through to me, despite my lack of attention and the terrible noise made by the wargs.

"Yeah?" I replied.

"Are you alright?" Both brothers asked.

"I'm fine."

As I said those words, a long whistle seemed to calm the wargs. They remained under the trees, but they had stopped to try and climb them. Pain was forgotten once more as my eyes tried to find this new threat. There was no doubt in my mind that whomever managed to tame those wargs wasn't an ally.

From the tree line a bit further away I saw several wargs slowly walk in our direction. There were many of them, at least a dozen. As I counted them, I soon realized that they were mounted by dark figures but I couldn't properly see who it was. A memory of the chase before our arrival in Rivendell flashed through my mind. Could it be the same creatures? Could it be orcs?

As they took their time to come closer I realized one of the wargs was actually white furred. Below us, the growls and gnarls of the other beasts didn't stop until the mounted wargs came closer. I soon realized that more wargs without riders were behind the mounted ones. I frowned and shuddered.

There was definitely no way we would be able to get out of this situation without fighting.

The creatures slowly crept closer and finally stopped not too far away. Only the white one kept walking, quickly jumping on a large rock as if it was a pedestal.

I heard a loud gasp from another tree but I didn't dare turn to have a look around. At the same time, the orc mounting the white warg started to speak.

"What's this language?" I frowned and looked down at Fili and Kili.

Fili was glaring at the orc and Kili seemed a bit lost as he looked up at me.

"It's the orcs' language."

I quirked an eyebrow, though now wasn't really the time to tell Kili that I could have guessed that on my own. I couldn't understand one word that the creature spat but I could tell one thing. That tall, pale orc was really enjoying the situation. He was clearly mocking us, though his eyes didn't leave one spot.

I didn't dare try to find out who was capturing his attention so much. I was too busy trying not to fall. Then suddenly the pale orc shouted something, an order obviously, and all the wargs that weren't mounted immediately resumed their attack on our trees. As the trunk shook under the assault, I still glanced at this orc. He was smiling.

I shuddered.

"Damn!" I heard Fili groan. "There's too many of them."

I looked down and realized that there was indeed quite a lot of wargs who were relaying to attack our tree. Each time they would jump in our direction and hit the trunk, it would shake violently.

"The trunk isn't going to resist for long." The blond dwarf added, voicing my thoughts.

As if on cue, we heard a loud crack.

For a second my heart stopped beating.

Then adrenaline rushed in my veins yet again as the tree slowly started to tilt. During a brief instant, it felt as if it froze in space. Then it started its quick fall.

I yelped as the tree fell in the direction of the other trees where our friends were still hiding from the wargs' jaws.

"Amelia, jump!" I heard Fili order me.

I honestly couldn't.

My body had decided to react in the most stupid way, and by the time my brain managed to realize it, it was already too late. I was uselessly holding onto the tree trunk.

"Amelia!" I heard both Fili and Kili shout before their voices disappeared in the mess of sounds around me.

I closed my eyes and pressed my forehead against the trunk, scraping my skin. I felt branches whip my back as the tree crashed against the other one. The only positive thing was that I had managed to keep my hold on the tree through the shock. I probably looked like a stupid koala right now, hugging the trunk for dear life. Luckily for me, lower branches had stopped the fall, allowing me not to finish crushed between two trees.

Roars and growls came from the wargs that were now trying to jump on the tree I was still clinging to.

"Amelia!" Someone shouted.

I finally managed to shake myself out of my frozen state and, pushing away any thought of pain, I twisted my upper body to get a grip on the second tree's branches. One of them was just behind me, above my head. Once I grabbed it, and with agility skills I didn't know I possessed, I let go of the first tree and swung to a lower branch. My feet made a soft thump as I fell on the lower branch. I swayed for a few seconds before I leant against the trunk. I had no idea where the others were.

Breathless and completely bewildered by the whole situation, I looked wildly around.

Quickly my eyes caught sight of Fili, Kili, Bofur and Bombur. Bombur was trying hard to avoid the jaws of the wargs. Bofur was helping Kili who had lost his footing. Meanwhile Fili was trying to go in my direction. I had somehow ended up slightly above them all.

"Are you alright?" Fili called to me and I just had the time to nod before another huge crack resonated in my bones.

I saw Fili's eyes widen and his face paled. I knew my own face reflected the exact same emotions. The tree we were on was breaking under the assault and the weight of the first broken tree.

"Jump!" Fili ordered me as the world once more tilted.

This time I was more prepared, even though nothing could really prepare you to live through such a thing. My mind and body were completely focused on the task I had to accomplish, and if someone, or several persons, called my name, well I didn't hear. The growls and gnarls fell into the back of my mind. The powerful smell of pine that was all around me became some sort of background. My eyes focused on one spot. Just one spot. A branch, not too far away, that was rapidly approaching me and would be slightly above me. Maybe I should have chosen another one, but the only one below was way too close to the ground for my liking.

I tried to crouch as much as it was possible on a moving tree branch and finally jumped at what seemed to be the best moment.

During a second I feared I wouldn't make it.

Then my hands touched the wood of the branch.

My chest collided with it violently.

The air was expulsed forcefully from my lungs and I let out a pained yelp as a few tears escaped my eyes. If none of my ribs were broken after that, I could consider myself lucky. I ignored the tears and pain and tried to heave myself on the branch when a shudder preceded by a loud crack alerted me of what was to come.

I wouldn't have the chance to jump anywhere this time.

My eyes were impossibly wide as I witnessed the fall of the tree I was clinging to yet again.

I heard voices around but couldn't catch any word.

A part of my brain registered that after this tree, there were only two left before we would all fall to our death in yet another precipice.

Then reality crashed around me. Literally.

I managed to cling to the branch as my body swung in the air. Pain tore my arms and suddenly I couldn't take it anymore. My mouth opened in a soundless scream as I fell. My only reflex was to try and protect my head as I crashed against branches, needles scrapping my skin. I bounced from one branch to another. Another loud crack terrified me as I hit the ground brutally. My mind was foggy at best. The fall and the hits taken had disorientated me terribly. Pain seemed to radiate from everywhere. A thought crossed my mind and I wondered if the crack had been coming from my bones. It certainly felt like it.

As I thought this, I was hit violently on the side and back.

Everything turned to black.

* * *

><p>I coughed.<p>

Pained seared through me as my body shook and trembled.

I couldn't open my eyes yet.

I couldn't breathe either.

I coughed again. Every convulsion sent more pain through my chest and limbs.

I tried to moan, but my throat was on fire. I could feel my body burning. If the fever was already that strong, then it meant I had been unconscious for a long time.

I coughed again and managed to let out a wordless sound. It didn't make me feel any better. Sweat was dripping from my brows on my closed eyes. I couldn't open them yet. Still, my face was burning and I fought against my own body to once again control it as I should. I managed to move a hand, and as I placed it in front of my eyes, I oddly felt a slight reprieve from the heat.

Coughing some more I suddenly realized that I was inhaling fumes.

This sudden realization made me cough yet again and I finally had the strength to open my eyes.

The world around me was on fire.

I had no idea what had happened.

I only knew that I had been trying to escape from wargs when I had fallen to the ground. As I tried to move, I found out that I was smashed against the ground by a branch. The trees at my right were in flames. The fire was slowly but steadily advancing towards me and the wood that was still left untouched by the furnace.

I held my breath as much as I could as dark smoke whirled around me before going up in the night sky. I had no idea where the dwarves were. I couldn't afford to think about them now. If I didn't escape from this vegetal trap, I would soon be roasted. I fought against the memories of the trolls that came to me at this moment. Now wasn't really the time to have a panic attack.

Trying to kneel didn't do me any good. The branch pressing on my back was too large to be bent or broken. Luckily it hadn't completely flattened me on the ground. Wiggling and pushing on my feet, I managed to slide slightly to the side, further away from the fire. Alright, at least it seemed I could crawl my way out of there. It took me ages though. Crawling on the ground wasn't helping the injuries in my chest and hands at all. The pain was properly excruciating and for a long moment, that probably only lasted about a minute, I wondered whether or not I would be able to withstand it and get away from the flames. I felt the pressure against my spine slowly recede as it increased in my lower back and, finally, my legs. Thankfully, the fire wasn't any faster than me.

I was exhausted when I freed myself from the tree's prison. Still relief flood me as I extricated myself from the deadly trap.

But I wasn't saved.

Far from it actually.

From where I was, kneeling on the ground, I was completely encircled by fallen pines in flames and the precipice. The edge of the ravine wasn't even two steps away from where I was. The heat from the flames was already burning me, even though the fire hadn't reached the branches closest to me yet. Further away, I could see through the flames that the last tree that had been standing at the very edge of the precipice, was now barely hanging there. Its horizontal position froze the blood in my vein.

My breath got caught in my throat as tears welled up in my eyes.

Where were the dwarves?

Please Mahal…they couldn't have fallen.

I somehow managed to stand on shaky legs. I made one step, swaying on my feet as pain and exhaustion were becoming simply too powerful to control. My second step wasn't any better. I squinted my eyes, bringing my right hand to my face to try and protect myself from the heat. Looking ahead, I finally saw something odd about the tree.

There was a very weird branch that seemed to barely hang to the trunk. Squinting my eyes some more I finally let out a gasp as I realized that the branch was in reality two dwarves swinging in the air. A gust of wind blew the heavy smoke in my direction at this moment and I had to bend in two as I coughed heavily. My eyes were stinging and every cough made pain shot through my whole body. Still, the knowledge that two of my friends were facing their death had me take several steps in their direction.

When the smoke cleared a bit around me, I looked back up.

Now that I knew dwarves were still on that tree, I forced my eyes to focus some more to get a better view of it. I now easily spotted darker spots in between the branches. Some were moving, feet dangling in the air. I couldn't count them, so I had no idea whether or not they were all there. I was too far away from them yet to call them, and I didn't want to catch the attention of the wargs. My brain was still fuzzy when one figure slowly stood on the tree and disappeared behind the wall of flames that separated me from the wargs. I tried to shake my head to clear my thoughts, but it wasn't helping much. I was burning and I could hear my heart beat strongly and rapidly. At the same time, I heard several voices shout desperately and I feared the figure I had seen, was now in danger. I didn't have the opportunity to think about it, I had to bend once more as yet another gust of wind surrounded me with dark smoke and sparks.

This time though, I tried to concentrate on the pain I felt. I tried to use it as a mean to wake my brain. Thankfully it worked. Now that I was becoming a bit more lucid, I could hear the wargs' gnarls above the cracking noise the fire made. I glanced at the tree to realize that several dark shapes were missing. I opened my mouth but no sounds came from my throat. I would have screamed if I could when I saw the two dwarves dangle one last time before finally falling in the darkness of the precipice.

My throat was too raw to do anything else beside whimper pathetically though.

I didn't have any tears to shed.

My world seemed to freeze for an instant.

For a whole moment I forgot the flames. I forgot the wargs. I forgot the orcs.

My world was frozen.

The pain I felt was more terrible than anything I had ever felt before. Physical pain could be cured. But it was my very soul that hurt when I saw my friends disappear in the precipice.

I fell to my knees.

After the pain, despair came so quickly that I let out a broken sob as my right hand clutched my tunic above my heart. I wanted to cry. I wanted to scream and shout. I wanted to destroy those wargs and orcs. They were responsible.

As I turned a heated gaze towards the flames, I only then realized that I was now hearing some battle sounds. My heart leapt as my ears caught an unmistakable Khuzdul war cry. Some dwarves were still alive!

I made an unsteady step in the direction of the flames, but it was entirely too stupid of me to think I could cross them. They were burning high and I couldn't even get close to them without suffocating.

It slowly sunk into my brain that I was stuck on this side while my friends were probably fighting a losing battle on the other. I heard someone scream and several more shouts just as huge shadows passed above me.

I instantly whirled around only to see a huge, a really freakily huge bird come straight in my direction. It hovered above me for a short while, its immense wings creating a strong wing that pushed the flames in the other direction, making them grow twice as high in the same time. I fell to my knees and protected my head, though I knew it was stupid and useless.

When I saw the animal's claws move in my direction I honestly thought my life would end soon. Of all the different deaths that I had thought about, finishing in some eagle's stomach hadn't been one I had prepared myself for.

I was completely numb as the claws circled around me and I felt my feet and hands leave the ground. Air rushed around me but I didn't close my eyes. I couldn't as I saw for just a second the battlefield where some of my friends were still trying to escape from more huge eagles. My stomach lurched as I witnessed someone, I couldn't see who, got taken by an eagle only to be thrown in the precipice.

When I felt the animal's grip on me loosen, my heart stopped.

And then I fell.

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><p><strong>AN: And once again many readers were kind enough to leave a review. Huge thanks to all of you who read, follow, review and put this story in your favourite. It's always a pleasure to know some people like this story. I just wish to apologize, I don't really have much time to reply individually to your reviews, but know that I read and appreciate them.  
><strong>

**I do want to reply to one of the guests though, who told me that it didn't make sense that there was both a door and a trap in the cave. Well, I'm sorry you felt this way and maybe I didn't explain it properly. In my mind it just made more sense that there was indeed a door somewhere in the cave for the goblins to use, and I don't see why that would prevent them to put a trap there too. Does it truly make no sense? **

**On another note, I hope you enjoyed this chapter, which was obviously a bit more action oriented. How did you find the description of the fights? I still don't feel overly confident in it. Was it clear enough? **

**I'm slowly writing the chapters, trying to keep them long and to keep the story both different and entertaining, hence the very slow updates. My life is also very busy right now (both on a professional and personal level) and will most likely become even more busy in the coming weeks and months but I will try to update between 2 to 4 weeks from now (so in the worst case scenario it'll be in a month from now.) **

**Thanks again for showing your support!**


	52. Up in the Sky and down to Earth

**Everything belongs to JRRTolkien, except the OC and odd parts of the plot.**

* * *

><p>The wind was whipping my face, howling in my ears in a long, ominous cry. My eyes were shut tight and my whole body was numb. My heart was beating at an insane rate, and I darkly hoped I would die of a heart attack and end it all before I met the ground. There was no way that I would be able to survive this. How long still? How long before I died?<p>

Tears were barely forming on the corner of my eyes before they were swept away by the wind.

I was falling.

For an instant that seemed to last an eternity, I had the utter certainty that the short inhale I took was actually my last breath.

In that moment, I would have expected to have my life flash in front of my eyes. It was how it was supposed to happen, or so I thought. Instead of seeing memories, I saw nothing. There wasn't any tearful remembrance. There wasn't any particular feeling. Just the fear. I only felt that unaltered and crippling fear which came with the certainty that there wouldn't be any tomorrow. There was only this terrible sensation of falling, and this time I knew it was for real and not a trick of my brain before I fell asleep.

That was it.

Then I collided with something. Hard.

I bounced off the object at first, but then instinct kicked in.

My hands instinctively grabbed whatever it was that I had fell on. I didn't register any pain, but maybe it was because right now my whole brain was frozen in terror. Nothing could have loosened my grip on the weird, soft, feathery material I was holding onto. My heart was still racing. I could barely breathe. It registered in some part of my brain that I was in a state of shock.

Frozen in terror it took me awhile before I actually started to analyze what my body was feeling.

I could still feel the cold wind against my face, but it didn't come from the same direction.

It took me awhile, but after several very long minutes, I managed to blink and, still clutching tightly onto whatever it was I had landed on, I looked around. I whimpered at first when I realized that I was still very high in the sky. I shut my eyes tightly, hoping that this was nothing but a stupid nightmare. I would really love for Nori to come and wake me up right then.

As I started to pray Mahal to let me live through this, I finally heard voices. The sounds were odd, partially muffled by the howling of the wind in my ears, but if I concentrated hard enough, I could make out words, or rather names, and discern voices.

"Uncle!" Kili kept shouting.

"Thorin! Thorin!" Fili's heart wrenching call was echoed by several other dwarves.

Those shouts did nothing to appease my fears. I had no idea where the dwarves were. I couldn't find it in myself to move an inch, and as far as I could see at the right side of the giant bird I was currently on, there was no one. I was shivering, from the cold or the fear, I didn't know. As I closed my eyes again, concentrating on the voices I could hear, I finally caught something that forced my hand.

"Amelia!" Nori's broken shout tore my heart apart and filled me with hope at the same time.

I knew he was alive. He didn't have the same chance. For his sake, I would have to move. I would have to talk.

As I heard his broken voice once more, I took a slow, long inhale and tightened my grip on the bird's feather. His voice was now being echoed by Dori's. I bit my lower lip. I knew that Ori was probably getting scared too. Ever so slowly, I managed to sit. Nori wasn't shouting anymore. Dori was completely silent too. All the dwarves were actually silent. Now that I was actually trying to think about it, I hadn't heard Thorin's voice. Fili and Kili had sounded quite scared. Could it be…? No. Thorin couldn't be dead. It wouldn't make sense. It wasn't possible. This dwarf was far too stubborn and scary to die so stupidly because of a few orcs.

Thinking of our leader distracted my brain from its fears and I managed to sit on the bird's broad back. Now that I was actually looking at my unexpected mount, I could see that it was even larger than I had thought. If I stayed more or less on this exact spot, and if the bird flew straight, I probably wouldn't fall. That was reassuring.

The silence coming from the dwarves wasn't.

I looked around.

The sun was rising in the horizon. The sky was ablaze. Hadn't I been currently sitting on a giant bird, the view would have taken my breath away. I couldn't see anything except for the endless sky. That actually worried me a bit. I hadn't heard the dwarves for several minutes and I couldn't see them. Suddenly I felt anxious. I bit my lower lip. Could I have been hallucinating? There was only one way to find out. I would have to move and look under that stupid bird.

Gathering all courage I could muster, I crawled towards the bird's head. Instead of staying on my knees though, I decided to lie flat on my stomach. This would provide me with more stability. I took a deep breath before I glanced down.

The first thing I noticed was the height.

It actually made my head spin.

I clenched my fist in the bird's feather and whimpered again. I was quite sure that it was only a matter of second before I started to hyperventilate when my eyes caught sight of other giant birds. On each of them I could see dwarves. My heart hammered against my ribs. With the strength of the wind, I had tears in my eyes and my vision was greatly diminished. I couldn't really see who was where. Still, I had heard their voices, so, taking a large gulp of air, I shouted to make myself heard.

"Nori! Dori! Ori!"

Immediately I saw several figures move frantically, or well, as frantically as they could on the back of some birds. They seemed to look around.

"Guys!" I shouted once more.

This time, they were all moving and, hadn't we been in such a predicament, I would have rolled my eyes.

"Up! I'm up there!" I shouted once again before letting out a scream as my bird squawked loudly.

"Amelia!" I heard several shouts.

"Amelia, don't move!" Another dwarf ordered me, and I was all too happy to obey.

I would never move or speak again for as long as I was on this bird's back.

It was around that time that I spotted some sort of tall mount in the distance. The landscape was covered by forests and grassy plains, and in the middle of it all, there was this huge rocky mountain. Further away, the horizon line was made of huge, grey mountains. I blinked several times and admitted reluctantly that this was a sight to behold. The sky was turning orange and pink and a few clouds where turning this picture into a breathtaking sight. Then the bird I was on started to descend much too fast to my taste and I suddenly couldn't care less about the landscape. The animal flew directly in the direction of that first rocky mountain I had seen. When it started to hover before finally landing, I didn't hesitate to let go of my hold on its feather and slid to the ground. I would not be ashamed to admit I fell to my knees and rested my forehead against the cool rock for a minute.

I was so grateful to be on the ground again. I couldn't explain how relieved I felt. Maybe the bird would come back later to eat me, but right then I didn't care. I was back on the solid rock and hopefully there wouldn't be any orc or goblin nearby. I let out a choked sob in relief. I could hear my heart beat loudly in my ears. I could feel my hands shake slightly as I pressed my palms on the rock, welcoming the stinging pain from my cuts as a good sign. Feeling pain meant I was alive, and right now, being alive was something great.

I was forced to look up though when I heard the unmistakable sound of wings flapping close to me. I winced and turned as quickly as I could. The idea of being dragged back up in the sky was terrifying me. I couldn't possibly go back up without a very good reason, and I couldn't imagine any reason that could potentially be good enough. I realized only then, that I was near a large flat stone. I shakily stood up, using the stone as a support for my shaky legs. Wincing at every move I could make, I bit my lower lip and tried to focus on something else than the pain that lanced through my body.

The sight I was met with once I stood, made me forget my own weaknesses and pain.

A huge bird arrived and hovered for an instant. I could see now that it was an eagle. The old man jumped down and strode to the way opposite mine. Just behind this large eagle, I could see several others and that sight had me stop for a good minute. They were magnificent. I had to admit it. As terrifying as this whole flight had been, I wasn't going to deny the majesty of those creatures. The early morning sun seemed to cover them in a bright halo. Their brown feathers looked almost golden under its morning rays.

I was shocked by this unexpected sight.

During a short moment, the eagles didn't look so fearsome anymore.

They all flew in our direction until one by one, they all let the dwarves come down from their backs.

As soon as I saw the first dwarf, I started to make my way towards them. I couldn't really express how or what I felt. I was relieved, happy, exhausted, hurt, glad, afraid… I didn't know anymore. My legs were barely supporting my weight and I staggered clumsily towards the dwarves.

As I was about to fall, I fell against a strong chest.

Automatically my arms encircled the dwarf's shoulders. I didn't need to look to know that I was in Nori's arms. It felt wonderful. I could feel the braid falling in his neck as I hid my face in his beard. Neither of us spoke, and almost as soon as I ended up in his arms, I felt another pair encircle the both of us. I opened my eyes to see Ori, Dori being just behind him.

Nori shifted slightly and embraced both me and Ori, hiding his face between the two of us. At the same time Dori joined us. Ori and I ended up being sandwiched in a strong hug from Nori and Dori. It was painful to be squished this way, but I didn't care.

"I thought I lost you all."

The voice had been barely above a murmur. Hadn't we been all so close, I doubt we would have heard Nori's words. I couldn't look at him or at the others but I felt Nori's slight shivering and I realized that Ori was trembling a bit too. I strengthened my hold on them. I couldn't really tell what had happened, but it was obvious that the night had been quite scary for all of us. Nori had probably realized my absence when the trees were on fire. As for Dori and Ori, I couldn't tell what had happened to them, but obviously it had been perilous enough to shock Nori.

I wiggled a bit and managed to look at Dori.

He looked exhausted but relieved.

We all probably shared those feelings.

I saw him lightly bump his forehead against Nori's. The thief was looking down until that moment.

"Do you really think I would let my little brother all alone?" Dori softly said.

Nori let out a chocked chuckle.

The two older dwarves stepped back right then, though I could feel Nori's hand linger for a moment longer on my waist. Once they stepped away, I finally had the opportunity to look at Ori. My poor Ori looked shaken. Our gazes met and we immediately fell into each other's arms.

"Where were you?" He breathed out. "I couldn't see you on the tree, and then we fell…"

"You fell?" I gasped, jumping back to look at him.

Suddenly the image of two dark shapes falling from the tree crossed my mind and I looked at the three brothers.

"You were the ones who fell?!" I repeated with a strangled voice.

"Just before the eagles arrived." Nori softly murmured.

I turned my head to look at my thief then. I could see it all in his eyes. He had seen his brothers fall in the depth of a dark precipice. At that moment he probably thought them gone. He had no way of knowing they would be rescued by giant eagles. I could read in his eyes the terror and despair that had assaulted him then. I could see it all and it broke my heart.

"And you were nowhere to be seen." Nori added then, startling me a bit.

I glanced at the three of them. They had all realized my absence. They had all probably thought the worst had come to pass.

"I was by the trees." I simply replied in a soft tone.

There wasn't much to say about it. The last days and night had been exhausting both physically and emotionally. I couldn't deal with any drama right now. I just wanted to lie down and sleep. I sighed as I realized that. Then I looked around us.

The other dwarves were more or less in little groups but they were all looking at our leader. The old man, Gandalf, I remembered now, was kneeling beside him, his hand on Thorin's forehead.

It was only then that I realized he had been injured.

I swore and tried to go to him. I had only been allowed to come because I was a healer. It was my job to help them. I winced as my knees buckled and I would have fallen if not for Dori's strong arms. At this moment, more than ever, I hated being so weak, so human. If I wasn't useful, what right did I have to be here at all? I cursed my weak body. I hadn't been through more than the others. All the dwarves had fought and run. All of them had flown on the eagles' back. I was also pretty sure that most of them, if not all, had injuries too. Yet it seemed that I was the only one who could barely walk. Begrudgingly I had to admit that Dwalin was probably right. Humans were frail or weaker than dwarves at least. I obviously had less endurance than them.

"I need to help Thorin." I just said, grinding my teeth, annoyed by myself.

At that moment, our king startled awake.

We all walked to him. Dori was supporting most of my weight as I leant heavily on him. He helped me as we made our way to the small group that surrounded Thorin. Gandalf was smiling, looking rather obviously relieved, until our leader coughed and finally spoke.

"The hobbit, where is the hobbit?" Thorin managed to say between coughs.

"He's fine." Gandalf replied. "Bilbo is here with us all."

I had no idea why Thorin would think first about Bilbo. It seemed rather odd. Until then, he hadn't really cared much for the hobbit. After the ordeal we had been through I would have expected him to ask for his nephews instead. The dwarves made way for Thorin as Bilbo looked a bit sheepish. I tilted my head, finding it a bit odd that Bilbo would almost look relieved and slightly proud even. What had happened during the short time I had been away from the dwarves?

Looking at the faces around, I fully expected the king to be friendly with Bilbo.

Even Dwalin was looking at the hobbit with a kind smile.

Glancing around it was evident that all the dwarves seemed to see Bilbo in a new light.

So I could only be shocked, like the others were, when Thorin growled at the sight of the kind hobbit.

"You!" He snapped, startling me and half the dwarves. "Didn't I say that you weren't part of this company? Didn't I say you were useless and that you should never have come? Didn't I make it clear you didn't belong with us?"

I was looking at the scene unfold wide eyed. The dwarves were just as shocked. Yet, or maybe because of our surprise, none of us intervened. I was trying to form sentences in my head to defend Bilbo when Thorin surprised me yet again.

"I have never been more wrong in my life." He breathed out before embracing a shell shocked Bilbo.

Kili let out a chuckle and in an instant most dwarves were cheering happily, clapping Bilbo's back and embracing him.

"What in Mahal's name happened when we were separated?" I breathed out, glancing at Dori.

He was about to reply when Thorin's voice rose once again.

"You!" I looked at him and realized he was pointing at me. "Where were you?"

All the dwarves, Bilbo and even Gandalf stared at me right then.

"You were just behind me and then you disappeared." Fili said with a frown. "What happened?"

"I'm curious about that too." Balin said, stepping closer and looking at me with concern.

Oddly, I suddenly felt my cheeks burn as I blushed. What had happened to me was so stupid that I felt slightly ashamed to tell them all. As they were obviously planning to wait until I replied, I sighed and looked up at the sky.

"I didn't manage to jump, so I ended up under the fallen trees." I kept it short.

I didn't want to say that I had been too hurt and weak to keep on jumping. I really didn't want to say that I had been so scared that I couldn't find it in myself to keep on moving. Most of all, I wouldn't say how I blacked out for a moment and almost managed to get myself caught under burning trees.

"You were in the fire?" Bofur breathed out, clearly shocked.

I glanced around. Most of the dwarves seemed horrified, and Bilbo wasn't fairing any better. Oin probably hadn't heard, so he looked impassive, just like Dwalin though I wasn't sure why he was the only one who didn't react much. Nori's eyes were wide and riveted on me. Ori's mouth was hanging open. Fili and Kili both looked at each other uncertainly. Bifur wasn't paying attention, or at least he wasn't reacting, and both Bombur and Bofur had paled. But it wasn't them that I looked at. Gloin, Dori, Balin and Thorin were frowning and exchanging glances with each others.

Gandalf coughed loudly then and distracted everyone as he spoke to us.

"We should probably keep going." He simply said.

Meanwhile I was busy trying to avoid looking at any of the dwarves. It was more or less at that moment that I first looked at the landscape and the place we were on.

Silently praying for my legs to stay strong, I walked away from Dori's strong support. It was quite an amazing view we had from this huge rock we were on. Forests and mountains encircled us. As I looked at the horizon, ignoring the dwarves behind me, I saw a tall mountain slowly appearing from behind a veil of clouds. It stood high and mighty, its top still half hidden by those clouds.

I blinked.

I wouldn't be able to explain how or why, but seeing that mountain suddenly made me feel…something.

I frowned. It was strange that I couldn't put a name on this feeling. My heart started to pound strongly in my chest. The simple sight of that one mountain made my skin break out in gooseflesh as a shiver ran up my spine.

"Is that…" I heard Bilbo say nearby.

"Erebor…" Thorin breathed out.

Only then did I realize that the dwarves had walked close to this edge too. Still, I couldn't take my eyes away from the mountain. The Lonely Mountain. The name was appropriate. Erebor stood there, in front of us, and suddenly I really wanted to be there. It struck me unexpectedly, but at that moment I truly wanted to be in Erebor. I wanted to see the mighty mountain from its foot. I wanted to see its tall slopes. I wanted to step under its shadow. I wanted to walk the mighty Halls it sheltered. I didn't want it for the dwarves' sake. I wanted it. I, Amelia, the lost human, wanted it.

The intensity of those feelings took my breath away.

I hadn't expected that.

Was it possible that the simple sight of Erebor would make me feel this way, or was it the exhaustion that was meddling with my brain?

I couldn't tell, but I did feel tired.

We all stayed there for awhile longer before Gandalf broke us all from our daze. Then Thorin ordered us to gather and keep going. His voice sounded slightly off though. It seemed that the sight of his old home made our leader a bit emotional. I wouldn't hold it against him. Even though I had never been there, it was hard even for me to tear my gaze away from the Lonely Mountain.

"How do we get down that thing?" Gloin gruffly asked as we gathered at the centre.

"Will the eagle bring us down?" Kili wondered, looking all excited.

For my part, I honestly hoped they wouldn't. I was grateful for their help, but I wasn't about to ask for a repeat.

"We'll take the stairs, of course." Gandalf replied, striding to the other edge.

"Stairs? Who would carve stairs here?" Dori frowned.

As he asked his question, we had all followed Gandalf and were now looking at something that I wouldn't have called stairs.

"Someone very tall, obviously." Fili replied.

That was a way to put it. From where we were, it did look like stairs, but it seemed that they had been made for giants. Each step was probably as high as I was tall. The stairs seemed to go down, winding around the mount, and were directly carved in the rock.

"Let's go. We don't have much time left." Thorin pressed us and he was the first one to jump after Gandalf.

I thought for a moment that I saw him wince but he kept going. Dwalin wasn't far behind him and was quickly followed by Oin and Gloin. I looked at the stairs and wondered how I would ever be able to go down. Asking for help would be like screaming around that I was injured. But on the other hand, I was injured and I just knew that if I were to jump from one step to the next, I wouldn't go far before I would collapse to the ground in pain. I could only take shallow breaths as my ribs were hurting painfully. My hands were burning and most part of my body seemed to throb. All in all it was a wonder that I was still standing. I had no choice but to keep going though. I took a deep breath, or I tried at least, and stepped toward the edge only to be stopped by a hand on my shoulder.

"I'll go first." Dori simply said before he jumped down the step.

There, instead of going to the next one, he turned to face me and extended his arms in my direction.

"It'll be easier if you sit on the edge." Nori commented, holding my waist.

I bit my lower lip in shame and felt myself blush. I couldn't hide my weaknesses apparently. I could have been stubborn right then. I could probably have tried to jump on my own. I knew a stronger person would have ignored their help. Well, I wasn't strong and hurting what little pride I had left wasn't going to compare to the physical pain I would feel if I didn't accept their help. Listening to Nori's advice I sat and jumped directly into Dori's arms. It hurt as well, but probably much less than it would have, hadn't he been there.

Behind me, Nori and Ori jumped down, quickly followed by Bifur, Bofur and finally poor Bombur who wasn't happy with this situation.

For each step after that one, we repeated the same actions. Before long I was tired of it all. The sun was continuing its course in the sky and I wondered whether we would ever arrive to the ground. I tried my best to ignore the precipice and I kept my gaze on the steps. I had fallen enough in the past days. I didn't want a repeat.

Our descent was painfully slow. To my utter shame, I was slowing down everyone, or at least it was how I felt. The way down seemed never ending. The stairs remained just as high during the whole time. It was probably late in the afternoon when we finally jumped down the last step.

I was glad to finally arrive to ground level. I didn't want to have to climb anything for awhile.

I wasn't about to complain though. As Dori let me to the ground for the last time, I sighed loudly and couldn't help but sag a bit against him. He let me of course and brought a protective arm around my shoulders. During our way down I had had a lot of time to think. The past few days had been quite full in emotions.

But most of all they had exposed how easily we could lose some of us. I knew that I wouldn't have to try very hard to remember the two dark figures falling from a tree. I couldn't help but shiver at the thought. There was also the fact that we were being followed and tracked down like rabbits by some orcs. We could all fall during a battle just like we could as easily die stupidly. The little adventure in the mountain with the stone giants could have cost us the lives of half the company. This journey was no regular mission, I knew that already, but the past days had made sure I couldn't ignore it at all.

The vulnerability I had seen in Nori up the mount wasn't anything to be ashamed of. I actually could relate to his feelings and I was sure Dori and Ori too. They had thought they had lost their brothers. Nori probably thought at some point he had lost me too. And the sad truth was that we could actually very easily lose someone to this quest. If no one died before the end, we would be very lucky. I could see that now. It was one thing to know it logically. It was another thing altogether to experience the fear first hand.

My thoughts were rather forlorn when Thorin spoke.

"We'll look for some place to camp"

I looked at him and realized that his face was unusually pale. He looked almost grey. A quick glance around told me that not many dwarves were faring much better.

"Will it be safe?" Gloin asked tiredly.

"The eagles have brought us further than I thought they would." Gandalf spoke next. "We should be safe from the orcs for a few days."

"We should use this time to keep going and not lose this advantage." Thorin groaned while Dwalin and Gloin nodded.

"No." Oin intervened. "Too many of us are injured. We need to rest for one night at least."

No one would contradict the main healer's words, but I could tell that Thorin wasn't too happy about it. Looking around though, it was obvious he wouldn't have much choice. I was pretty sure that even our leader was just hours away from fainting. He couldn't be feeling any better than any of us. Actually, from his look I could tell that he was probably feeling worse than many.

"We have to try and find water." Balin commented then. "And food."

"Aye." Thorin agreed tiredly. "Kili."

He didn't need to say anything more. Almost immediately the young dwarf took his bow and an arrow in hand. Fili grabbed a few throwing knives, even though his uncle hadn't asked him too. The two younger dwarves were clearly appointed as hunters while we would make our way to wherever it was that Gandalf was leading us. We all started to walk and I could only grimace at the pain I was feeling at each step.

As the day grew older, the pain in my lower stomach made itself known again.

By the time Thorin decided to stop, I was simply miserable.

I wanted to let myself fall to the ground on the spot. Still, I couldn't. Thorin gave orders and several dwarves disappeared in the trees' shadows, looking for firewood and food.

I took a minute to look around.

We were in a small clearing and, if my ears weren't tricking me, there was running water nearby. It had to be real, because it made sense for Thorin to stop here if a river was close enough for us to use its water.

Dori squeezed my arm lightly and offered me a kind smile before he left to help the others.

I didn't pay too much attention to them actually. My gaze was riveted on Thorin. I saw him wince as he used a tree to slowly sit down. He was leaning back against the same tree's trunk, his eyes closed, when I decided to finally make myself useful.

Slowly and half limping, I made my way to where he was. On my way, I realized that Oin wasn't here, he had followed Gloin in the woods. Gandalf was sitting a bit further away, alone. Thorin opened one eye and groaned when I painfully knelt near him.

"What do you want?"

I was too tired to care about politeness and other similar details.

"What do you think?" I sighed as I shakily started to open my leather tunic, not entirely, but just enough to gain access to my satchel and then untie the leather cord that held it to my body.

Thorin glared at me.

"Go away. Let me rest."

"Could you please remove your coat and tunic so that I could check your injuries?" I replied evenly.

"I don't need your help. Go rest somewhere else." He grunted darkly.

I really was too tired for this. I placed the satchel in front of me and sighed loudly before finally looking at him. My gaze met his and he quirked an eyebrow at me. Enough was enough. I snapped.

"Thorin, you may be our leader, but I am in charge of the company's members' health." I wasn't afraid of his glare right then. "So if I tell you to strip so that I can see your wounds, you do it." I glanced around and saw that several dwarves were looking at us. "If you want to, we can do this here or in a more private setting. But I won't let you have the choice."

"What are you going to do if I refuse?" Thorin snorted derisively.

I painfully clenched my fist. I had no patience. I was hurt. I was exhausted. I wanted to curl in a ball and weep because of the pain and fright I still felt. I honestly didn't want to deal with the dwarves' stubbornness right now. It really wasn't surprising that I didn't hesitate to glower at Thorin.

I looked around once more before I scowled at our leader.

"Bifur, Nori, Dwalin. I need your help here." I spat loudly enough to get the dwarves' attention.

They surprisingly all came. Maybe it wasn't that surprising considering the tone I was using though.

"What is it?" Dwalin grunted when they were all around me.

"I need you three to hold him down while I strip him or Mahal help me, I'm going to have to drug him to sleep and we'll lose time."

I said it all matter-of-factly. My tone was surprisingly cold and I meant each word I had pronounced. It probably was the reason why the four dwarves stared at me with stupefied wide eyes.

"Er…Amelia?" Nori tried to intervene softly.

"If I don't check him and treat his injuries what do you think might happen? Hm? Is any of you qualified to answer? No. Because I am the healer here. I know what I am doing. I listen to you when it comes to everything else. So you are going to listen to me when it concerns your health otherwise I swear you won't like the outcome." I ranted. "I'm tired. I want to rest but I won't until I have checked all your injuries. This isn't negotiable. So you have one choice to make right now. Either you make my life easier and you do what I say, or you don't." I took a deep breath and met Thorin's stare evenly. "So which one is it?"

For a long minute he didn't say anything. Neither of them spoke actually.

Then silently, and slowly, Thorin started to undo the laces that were closing his heavy coat. I nodded at him with a very small smile. Then I glanced at the three dumbfounded warriors that were staring at their leader as if he had grown a second head. I cleared my throat, catching their attention.

"What I just said included all the dwarves of the company." They stared at me blankly as I spoke calmly. "Once I'm done with Thorin, I'd very much appreciate not to have to fight with the rest of the company so, tell the others and be prepared."

"Aye, bastûna." Bifur said with a court nod before he left.

I glanced at Nori who wore a strange expression. I couldn't really describe it, but it made me blush slightly. He was smirking a bit, his eyes shining as he looked at me.

"Aye, aye, bastûna." He said, winking at me.

Then he just left without adding another word. Dwalin simply nodded at me and followed him. I was left alone with Thorin who had opened his coat and tunic and was now struggling to remove them. Ignoring the pain in my own limbs, I helped him without giving any comment. There was nothing to say anyway. He was hurt. He needed help. I was a healer. It was my duty to him and the company. I would do my best to accomplish this duty.

Once I had also helped him remove his under tunic, his chest was left bare for me to check. I ticked at the sight of his wounds. His ribs were bruised and there were several puncture wounds that slowly bled. I gingerly prodded the area around those bruises, carefully checking his ribs to make sure none were broken. He accepted my touch silently.

From what I could tell, no ribs were actually broken. Once this was done, I looked more closely at his wounds. It looked almost as if he had been bitten. I frowned and looked up, at his face.

"What happened?" I wondered.

"Warg."

Well, that explained it. I grimaced at the thought of those creatures. Then I turned a bit and saw several unoccupied dwarves who were sitting not too far away. I was surprised to see that Oin and Gloin were back. I hadn't heard them. They had already started a fire and Oin was walking my way.

"I'll need water. Boiled water. Please." I said to no one in particular.

Oin nodded and stopped midway, turning back towards the others he started giving orders to the dwarves who, surprisingly, obeyed wordlessly. Quickly Oin then joined me and sat on Thorin's other side.

"We'll need to make sure those don't become infected." I said while I opened my satchel.

"How come you still have this?" Oin asked, pointing at my equipment. "I lost everything in those damn tunnels."

"She had it strapped under her tunic." Thorin grumbled, not even bothering to open his eyes.

I didn't pay much attention to either of them. Instead I was busy selecting plants to prepare some ointment I would later put on Thorin's wounds. Placing the small pouches near me, I then took out the thin needles I would use to stitch the biggest wounds.

I didn't even look up when someone placed a wooden bowl next to me. I was just about to put the needle and string in the boiling hot water when I startled slightly. Leaning forward I properly looked at the bowl. It was a very basic one. There was no decoration or anything on it. It seemed…unfinished. I had never seen the dwarves use anything like this.

"Where did you find that?" I finally asked, even though it probably wasn't really the right time to ask such questions.

It was Bofur who replied and I realized he was sitting nearby, a piece of wood on his knees and an impressive pile of wood chips around his legs.

"Just made it." He smiled at me before starting to work on the piece of wood.

I blinked.

Then I felt a small incredulous smile tug on my lips. These dwarves probably never would cease to amaze or surprise me in one way or another. As I glanced around, I realized that Bifur, Nori and several others were all busy carving pieces of woods into tools we would need.

My smile grew until Oin caught my attention.

"What's so interesting?" He grumbled at me as he reviewed the pouches I had placed aside.

I shrugged.

"Nothing much." I hissed as I washed my hands in the hot water, blinking back tears at the pain shooting from my palms and then placed the needle and string in the bowl before I leant closer to Thorin. "I'll stitch those ones." I said, pointing at the biggest wounds. "The others don't need any. You have a few bruised ribs too. It'll be good if you could rest a bit and avoid moving too much around."

Thorin opened his eyes and stared at me.

"Rest?" He grunted.

"Just sayin'." I shrugged and winced at the stupid move that painfully reminded me of my own injuries. "I guess I'll just have to bind them tightly." I sighed.

He didn't reply and simply closed his eyes back. Nori brought a second bowl filled with water and I placed some thyme in it. I grimaced as the only clean cloth I had wasn't really clean at all. We would have to make do with what we had. I ignored the pain in my own chest as I leant even closer and started to work on his wound, washing them with the cloth and water. Meanwhile Oin was already starting to prepare the poultice of snapdragon, houseleek and witch hazel we would later apply on Thorin's wounds. Hopefully it will help prevent any infection and would reduce any swelling that might occur. Without pausing, I let the cloth fall back in the now tinged water and took the needle and string. It was rather quick work to stitch back the wounds, even though my hands were shaking slightly due to the pain in my palms and my tiredness.

When I finished with the last stitch, Oin handed me the bowl containing the warm poultice and I could only marvel at the quick work the dwarves made. I could already count four of those wooden bowls. It was impressive how fast they carved them.

Thorin hadn't moved or opened his eyes at all when I started to put some poultice on each wound. I wasn't worried though as his chest kept rising in a slow rhythm with his breathing. I finished quickly and bound his chest with what little bandages I had. It wasn't nearly enough, and I didn't have any left once this was done.

I was having trouble keeping my eyes open, and I wanted nothing more than to examine my own chest, but the whole company needed to be tended to. I tried my best not to let my tiredness show on my face, but I wasn't doing a good job. Oin obviously saw it as he stood and helped me back to my feet.

I saw he was about to speak and I managed to cut in before he could.

"Alright, let's take care of the others."

"Amelia." He said with a warning tone.

"Let's take care of the others." I repeated stubbornly.

He sighed and nodded. He helped me to go next to the fire and then helped me down.

"Alright lads." He grumbled loud enough to catch everyone's attention. "Each one of you will come here and let us know where you're injured." He sat near me then.

It took some time, but after a while all injuries had been tended to. The dwarves had been rather lucky. The worst wounds were only scratches and cuts that needed very little work. There were a lot of bruises, but they would heal on their own. We were extremely lucky that there hadn't been any broken bones or worst wounds. I cleaned the scratches, stitched the bigger wounds, put ointment on the bruises and poultice on the bigger cuts but that was it. Once the last dwarf, Dwalin, stood back up I couldn't help but sigh loudly.

"What about you lass?" The warrior asked as he laced his tunic back.

Glancing around, I realized that most of the dwarves were paying extra attention to that conversation. I rubbed my forehead tiredly and grimaced at the sight of my palms. Sighing, I thought a bit before I replied.

"I'll be fine. Is the river close by?"

Dwalin nodded but his gaze didn't leave me.

I had to stand and it wasn't difficult to guess I probably wouldn't be able to on my own. I felt my cheeks heat when I looked at Dwalin. He was standing there, one hand extended in my direction. Blushing in shame I took it. I prepared myself to be hauled up quickly. I could only be surprised when Dwalin very gently leant forward and placed his arm around my back and very slowly brought me up to my feet.

"Thanks." I said softly and he only nodded.

I staggered a bit and went in the direction of Dori, Nori and Ori. They were sitting nearby, Nori was busy carving wood. Dori and Ori seemed to be using water and sand to polish it once it was carved. They all stopped when I came closer and looked at me. I offered them all a tired smile.

"Are you sure you're alright?" Ori asked in a small voice.

"I'll be fine." I replied, trying to placate his worries. "I'll just leave some of my stuff here while I go to the river."

Dori nodded while Nori's gaze didn't leave me. I tried to remove my leather tunic only to realize that my fingers were shaking too much for me to unknot the small leather binds. I saw that Nori stood up but before he could get closer, Dori was up too and placed a hand on his chest glaring at him.

"I'll help you Amelia." Dori said darkly and I looked at them incredulously.

"What's going on?" I couldn't help but ask.

"Nothing Amelia. Come here dear." Balin intervened. "If you want to get rid of that blood, you'll have to wet your coat." He added as he started to help with the blood coated laces.

I nodded drowsily and didn't pay any more attention to Dori and Nori. I was honestly not in a state to think about their fights. I was starting to think that the two brothers might just be like this all the time and that Nori's activities had not much to do with it. I grimaced and winced when Balin stepped in my back and helped me remove my coat. The simple gesture sent tendrils of pain in my shoulders and painfully stretched my ribcage. Once the long coat was removed though, I heard a gasp.

I was about to groan annoyingly.

If any dwarf was about to talk to me about propriety I would shout. Under the long leather coat, I was wearing a sleeveless leather corset that only reached past my hips and the long sleeved grey woollen tunic that reached just above my knees. I wasn't wearing anything that wasn't perfectly proper.

"Amelia! You're injured!" Ori cried in anguish.

"Mahal, he's right!" Kili exclaimed pointing at me.

I didn't understand.

Then I looked down, trying to find why they would think that.

In a second I let out an embarrassed squeak and let myself fall down to my knees quickly, ignoring completely any pain I felt. To be honest, my silly reaction was mostly due to my tiredness. I wasn't thinking straight anymore. Instead of staying calm and explaining things to those idiotic dwarves, I bent and ended up hiding my face behind my bloodied hands.

I could hear all the dwarves gathering around me and I groaned. I could feel tears prickle the corner of my eyes.

Those idiots were all trying to get me to stand again and I pushed each hand angrily.

"Go away!" I croaked, blushing terribly.

I had only needed a glimpse at my clothes to understand what was going on. My tunic was tainted with blood, and I knew that I wasn't injured. This blood could only come from one place and I really didn't feel like explaining to a bunch of dwarves, plus a man and a hobbit, that I had spent the last days going through my periods without anything to really clean myself or at the very least absorb the blood.

"Stop it all of you!"

I was honestly surprised to hear Gloin shout out loud. I was even more shocked to hear Thorin growl from his spot on the ground.

"Everyone just stop it."

Everyone looked at him. I glanced at our leader from behind my fingers. I was too exhausted right now and my emotions were going haywire, I couldn't control them anymore. Instead of just feeling slightly ashamed or embarrassed, I was just about to start crying. Meanwhile, Thorin was shouting orders.

"Fili, Kili, Dwalin, go check if you can find some more game around here. Oin, get a second fire started once the others have gathered more wood. We don't need to hide for now, and the warmth will be welcome. Nori, Bifur, I want the both of you to scout the area. Make sure we are safe here. Bombur, go with mister Baggins to try and find some more food. Bofur, go with them. All the others, just go gather wood."

"But Amelia…" Ori started before Gloin cut in.

"Just go gather wood Ori."

I could tell that some of the dwarves were hesitant to obey, but after one last groan from Thorin, they all scattered in the woods. I was left in the clearing with Thorin, Gloin and Gandalf who was smoking his pipe, sitting on a large rock and seemingly not paying attention to me.

"Amelia." Gloin called as he crouched near me.

To my utter shame, I sniffed right then and couldn't get a word to pass my lips.

"It's alright lass. Don't be ashamed."

As Gloin spoke he kindly took one of my beads between his fingers. I didn't need to look to know it was my kinship bead. I glanced at him but he was already standing. Wordlessly, the ginger warrior shrugged his heavy leather coat off and draped it around my shoulders.

"Go to the river Amelia. I'll make sure to shut the others when they come back." Gloin kindly said before he helped me stand. "Are you going to be alright? I know Danà sometimes suffers when this happen."

"As did Dís when she was younger…" Thorin groaned then before slowly standing up. "I remember that she placed something warm on her stomach to help with the pain. She liked to eat some fennel too."

I looked up then. I was still blushing terribly as my brain finally started to work. Of course, Gloin was married, he would know about those things. Thorin was as well Dís' brother. He had to take care of her when they were younger, or so I could guess. The two of them were used to be around women. They wouldn't make a fuss, which was exactly why I felt grateful right then. Silently I nodded at Gloin and managed to offer him a small smile before I scurried away in the direction of the river.

I was glad to be away from all those males right then.

The river wasn't too far, but still far enough that I wouldn't have to worry about privacy. Walking a bit closer to the riverbank, I saw that a bit further away there were bushes that came down to the river. They would provide a natural curtain that would hide me completely if I could get behind them. Thankfully, there were no thorns to push away and I easily pushed the branches out of my way. A few minutes later, I was safely hidden in between the bushes and could access the water without problem.

Wincing at the pain I felt, I let Gloin's coat fall to the ground and started to remove my corset. Ever so slowly I stripped. It took me much longer than usual. When I stood in just my bindings, I could see that blood stained my clothes. But instead of worrying about that, I gingerly touched my ribs. I had to check the damage.

Removing my bindings was possibly one of the most painful things I did in a while. My hands were shaking and the pain from the cuts on my palm was making me clumsy as the ache throbbed up my arms. As there was no blood on the long cloth I used as bindings, I could tell that I hadn't suffered from any cuts. But broken bones would be much more problematic than a simple flesh wound.

I felt a few tears roll down my cheeks as I gasped.

Finally the bindings fell to the ground.

I grimaced at the sight of my own chest.

A large bruise covered my left side and several smaller ones covered my breasts and my right side. I could see that the darkening bruises came up to my right breast bone. I couldn't help but let out small cries of pain when I forced myself to probe my ribs. They were clearly bruised but I was almost certain that none were broken. That was a small relief, but relief nonetheless.

I would have to make an ointment to try and soothe the pain.

For now though, I wanted nothing more than to step in the water. The coldness hit me as soon as I let my feet in. I dreamt of a hot bath but instead chose to let the cold clean the pain and blood away. Slowly I immersed myself. The cold made me shiver but I clenched my teeth. Once the water reached my chest I hissed and then sighed. The cold water was actually making me feel a bit better.

I grabbed my stained clothes while I was still in the water and washed them as best as I could. The water was tinted with blood and dirt. Soon enough, I threw my clothes on the riverbank, in the sun, hoping they would dry as much as possible quickly enough for me to wear them.

My palms were burning and I feared the injuries were infected. Flexing my fingers a bit I winced. At this point I could only hope that I would regain the full use of my hands. I let the cold water run on the wounds, washing them, clearing away the dirt that had accumulated there. As I could better see it, I grimaced yet again. Those cuts weren't clean ones. The rock had dug into my flesh quite messily. I wondered whether or not I should ask Oin to stitch them.

Without wasting any more time, I slowly removed the braid that bound my hair together. I kept the smaller ones bound as I immersed myself completely under the water. I hoped the water would wash the soot and dirt as much as possible.

I had no idea how long I stayed in the water, or how long I remained lying in the sun afterwards, hiding between the bushes. But when I finally decided that I had to stand, I groaned loudly at the pain in my sore muscles. I tried to tie my bindings around my chest, but I just couldn't. Sighing, I gave up and simply put my linen tunic and the long woollen one. Both were still damp, but there was nothing I could do about it. I placed some clean cloth in my panties, hoping it would absorb the blood I was still losing and grimaced. In times like these I could only miss terribly my previous world.

The sun wasn't so warm anymore when I stepped back in the camp, my corset, bindings, and Gloin's leather coat in my arms. I ignored the dwarves and walked to the warrior and gave his coat back to him.

"Are you alright?" He asked me kindly.

"Yes." I replied honestly.

The cold water and then the warm sun had helped me tremendously. Of course I was far from feeling perfectly healthy, but I was feeling a bit better, refreshed. There was yet another rather embarrassing matter I needed to take care of though. Instead of waiting, I chose to deal with it right then. Walking to the second fire where several dwarves were gathered, I went to talk with Oin. The three brothers all stood as I stepped closer. I ignored them.

"Oin," I said looking directly at the old healer. "I need your help."

"What's going on?" Dori immediately reacted.

Blushing slightly I looked at the oldest brother and tried to placate his worries.

"Nothing. I'm fine." This wasn't going to help much. "I just need a little help to put some ointment on."

"I can help you." Dori immediately jumped to his feet and I felt my blush darken.

"Dori, I really appreciate it, but…" I hesitated.

I didn't want to offend Dori. I could tell already that Ori was worried as well and by the look he was sending my way, Nori suspected something was wrong. I sighed loudly while Oin calmly stood next to me.

"But I'd rather have a healer's help." I finished my sentence.

"Amelia…" Ori started before Oin interrupted him.

"Oh, shush the lot of you." He then grabbed my elbow cautiously. "Follow me Amelia, let's go somewhere more private."

I nodded and we both made our way a bit further away, into the woods. We didn't go far at all, stopping just behind some lush bushes that would protect us from curious eyes, though I was once more absolutely certain that my friends wouldn't try to peak at me.

"Now." Oin sat on the ground and gestured for me to imitate him. "What do you need my help with?"

I groaned as I sat.

"I'll need some ointment to help against the bruises." I said at first. "And I'll need some help to bind my chest again. I can't move freely and…" I blushed a bit. "And I thought that a healer would be the most appropriate person to ask for help."

Oin simply nodded before giving me a warm smile.

"And don't forget we're kin. Now, show me these bruises."

I grimaced as I had to remove my tunic yet again. I heard Oin mutter something when he saw the dark colouring on my skin.

"What happened to you?" He asked before standing again. "I'll go grab the fresh batch of ointment I just made earlier."

I closed my eyes for a moment while he was gone. I heard him shush the worried dwarves before he came back. Wordlessly he sat next to me again and started to put the ointment on the bruises. I hissed in pain when he pressed his hands a bit too strongly against my ribs.

"Are you sure none are broken?" He simply asked with a frown.

"It doesn't seem like there is." I replied tiredly.

Oin didn't comment. Once those bruises were taken care of, he stood back up and sat behind me.

"Your back is bruised too." He simply mumbled, generously applying the ointment on my lower back and my right shoulder.

Once this was done, he bound my chest tightly. The thought crossed my mind that the women who wore corsets knew how I felt right then. I closed my eyes when I felt a sharp pain as Oin bound the cloth more tightly than I usually did.

"It'll be uncomfortable but I advise you keep your chest tightly bound for awhile. I'm not sure you don't have anything broken."

"I'll be fine." I sighed.

"I don't doubt that." He replied with a shrug. "Now, show me those hands you're trying to hide."

I blushed a bit and turned my palms up so he could see them. He swore in Khuzdul and gingerly took one of my hands in his.

"They will undoubtedly scar." He commented and I nodded, already knowing this. "I don't think we need to stitch them, but I'll put some poultice on it and bind them both tightly. I advise you to wear gloves for the next days to protect the bandages."

I sighed and nodded.

"If they're not healing properly in a few days, we'll be obliged to stitch them." He added, looking closely at the wounds.

"I know." I admitted. "I just hope we won't have to."

Even though he tried to be careful, it still hurt when he placed the poultice and then the bandages. It didn't take long though, and soon enough Oin was patting my knee kindly.

"Alright, let's go back before all those idiots start to imagine the worst." He offered me one of his rare smiles right then.

I snorted and winced immediately after, bringing one hand to my side.

"You know that no matter what, they will." I panted slightly and Oin patted my shoulder lightly.

"Come, we all need rest tonight."

"Let's just hope that Fili and Kili found some meat. I'd love to eat one of Bombur's stew."

When we stepped back in our camp, all the dwarves were back. To my pleasant surprise, Bombur was currently skinning rabbits. When I saw that, I felt I could have kissed the two youngest brothers.

Even though we were safe right then, the camp that evening was rather quiet. Every one of us had been hurt or injured in one way or another. Every one of us was tired, exhausted even.

Though, despite all the pain and hardships, I would have to admit one thing…the simple sight of Erebor seemed to have made it worth all the trouble.

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><p><strong>AN: And that's it for another chapter. Huge thanks to all the people who always leave a little (or a long) review. Thanks as well to the new followers and favourites. It's always useful to know what you all think of the story, what you expect and what you didn't...what you liked and what you didn't. I feel like I can't thank you all enough. I'm really moved by the reviews who compliment my writing skills and the story line, it means a lot to me. Thanks soooooo much everyone. It makes me want to try even harder.**

**By the way did you realize it's been over a year now? Wow, I hadn't paid attention to that...  
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**Anyway, I have a few specific things to say today. **

**First, a guest (PercyJ) left a review asking me whether or not I would mind to see this story translated into French. Really, I wouldn't mind at all. :) That actually surprised me though, because this story is huge. If you really want to try and do it, please contact me via PM so we can discuss it a bit before.**

**Second, another guest asked whether or not we had reached the scene of the prologue. That scene was actually the one with the trolls.**

**Third, I'm currently looking for someone who would like to beta a few chapters for me. Right now it'll only be for several chapters (five at the present time). It's mostly to get a honest opinion on the plot and the description of certain scenes I'm not entirely happy with. (though of course if I made mistakes in English, I'd be happy to have those betaed) please contact me if you're interested.**

**Fourth and last point, I put on another poll on my profile. It concerns the result of the BoFA. Once again, this is just a mean for me to test the waters, so to speak, but if a huge majority makes itself known, I might be enclined to go one way instead of the other.**

**Khuzdul: bastûna means "healing lady" **

**And that's it for today. I hope you all enjoyed this chapter and I apologize for the gruesome details and ugly topics of wounds and stuff. Next chapter will hopefully come in a couple of weeks. See you then! **


	53. A Bittersweet Respite

**Everything belongs to JRRTolkien, except for the OC and weird parts of the plot.**

**HUGE thanks to the two very kind persons who beta-ed this chapter. Eylanan and Sujammas, you were both amazing :) You really helped a lot and I hope I won't disappoint you with what I did.**

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><p>I blinked several times before groaning. The sun had probably been up for several hours, I noticed as I looked at the sky. The simple thought of moving from my spot on the ground wasn't really appealing at the moment. I could tell by the simple movement I had just made that my muscles were sore. Every one of them.<p>

Ori had obviously heard me and he quickly made his way towards me with a steaming bowl in his hands.

"Good morning Amee. Come eat, we have some leftover stew."

I smiled at him before wincing.

As I tried to sit up, pain shot through my chest and left me panting and motionless. I blinked back tears that had already gathered in the corners of my eyes.

"Wait a second Meli." I heard Bofur say right then.

I didn't look up when I felt arms help me up. I sighed in relief though once my body was once more motionless. Dizziness soon left me and I was able to open my eyes without swaying on my feet.

"Does it hurt a lot?" The kind artisan asked me then.

"I'll be fine, don't worry." I forced myself to smile then looked around.

Gandalf was frowning and seemed lost in his thoughts. He was sitting on the side of our camp, smoking his pipe. Near the fire I could see Bilbo and Bombur who were talking quietly. Dwalin wasn't far away from them, checking his weapons. Ori was just next to me with Bofur. I couldn't see any other dwarves though.

"Where did they all go?" I asked them as I walked towards the small fire that burnt nearby.

Ori was quick to sit and grab the meat that was roasting on a small stick. Bofur was just behind me when I tried to sit and he helped me again. With yet another sigh, I took the bowl Ori handed me.

"Nori and Bifur are making sure we aren't being followed yet." Bofur finally replied. "Fili and Kili are hunting. The others are talking somewhere near the river." He shrugged and sat next to me, grabbing his pipe and filling it.

"Talking?" I frowned as Bofur shrugged and looked away.

Thorin, Balin, Oin, Gloin and Dori were talking. Alright. But about what? I could only guess it had to do with the quest. I didn't really want to think about it anyway. Instead I started to eat what I guessed to be some rabbit meat.

I had fallen asleep almost as soon as my head had touched the ground yesterday evening. The lack of blanket hadn't bothered me in the least. Exhaustion had been enough to induce me into a dreamless sleep. I had no idea how long I had slept, but I was surprised that no one had woken me. I had expected to be forced to walk early at dawn. It was odd that we were still in this camp.

As if he knew my thoughts exactly, Bofur started to speak.

"Thorin decided to take this day to rest. I think Gandalf talked to him earlier this morning. Apparently he knows of someone living not too far from here that could help us, provide us some food and equipment." I nodded as he calmly explained the situation. "Thorin agreed that a day of rest wouldn't be too much after all the events."

Thank Mahal for that. It was almost a miracle that Thorin would let us rest today. I knew I was relieved to hear that. It must have shown on my face because Bofur chuckled lowly.

"We'll leave before dawn tomorrow morning though." He winked at me cheekily as I pulled a face.

"What time is it now?" I asked before starting to eat.

"Around midmorning I'd say." Bofur replied looking up. "The sun won't be at its highest for several hours."

"What are we supposed to do then?" It felt odd to stay here the whole day. I couldn't really imagine it. After the intense rush of the past week, it seemed surreal to stay here for a whole day.

"Rest." Someone grunted.

I looked up as I heard Dwalin come closer. He sat near us and stared at me evenly.

"Gimme your blades, lass." He simply ordered as he extended a hand towards me.

I nodded and put the bowl back down before taking the two daggers. I grimaced as I saw the dried blood on the blades. As I had guessed, Dwalin grunted unhappily.

"I told you to always clean them, at least a little, before sheathing them back." He admonished.

"Sorry." I muttered, looking down.

"Well, we can't blame you." Bofur tried to help. "With everything that happened…"

"A rusty blade won't help her much." Dwalin snapped.

I decided not to participate in their discussion. It was kind of Bofur to defend me, but we all knew that Dwalin was right. It wasn't serious of me to have forgotten about this simple thing. Circumstances had nothing to do with it. Wordlessly, and with Dwalin's help, I started to clean them. I had been surprised by Ori's silence at first, but when I glanced his way, I saw that he was busy writing in his notebook. I had rarely seen him write so fast before. He wasn't paying much attention to us. He didn't even blink when several dwarves came back from wherever they had been to.

"Amelia," Dori said kindly. "How are you today?"

"I'm fine Dori." I replied with a smile. "How's your knee?"

"All good, all good."

"What were you all talking about?" I couldn't help myself but ask.

I was surprised to see him tense a bit. Surely their discussion wasn't so secret that the mere fact I knew they had been talking was bad. He frowned and I realized then that Bofur, Dwalin and Ori all seemed to be waiting for an answer too. Clearly the other dwarves weren't sure what this had all been about. It struck me as odd but I didn't say anything, simply waiting for an answer.

"We were just discussing what will come next."

It was my turn to frown. I couldn't shake the feeling that Dori was keeping something from me. Something important. I glanced around. Ori was frowning, just like Bofur was, but Dwalin seemed his usual self and kept working on the blade.

It was Thorin's voice that caught my attention next.

"Alright. Nori, Fili, Bofur and Bifur, you stay here for now and keep watch. You'll go to the river after us."

I blinked, only realizing then that all the dwarves had come back more or less at the same time. It was usual. During missions, and earlier during this quest too, when a group was sent to do a task, he was also given an amount of time. After that time had passed, he had to come back, even if the task hadn't been completed yet. It was a matter of safety. At least, like this, if one group encountered some danger, the others will know if they didn't show up at the agreed time.

I looked at the dwarves as they all decided to make good use of the river and the day of rest we had. In my humble opinion as a healer, it would be a good thing for their wounds to be cleaned and it would do sore muscles good too. In my opinion as a modern women stuck in a weird world, well, it would be good for them to clean as much as possible.

I didn't move from my spot and stayed near Bofur. We were soon joined by the others. Nori sat next to me and I forced myself not to look at him. It wouldn't help me in the least.

Yesterday I had probably been too exhausted to feel anything except the pain. But now that my mind was clearer, I couldn't help but want to be with Nori. I needed him to hold me. I wanted to touch him, to make sure he was alive and well. It was most irrational. I didn't understand why I so strongly felt this need. Yet I couldn't deny that I felt this way.

I clenched my fist and stared at my knuckles as they turned slowly white.

Oh Mahal it was as though my skin was burning to be close and yet far from him.

How could I think that he wasn't alright when he was just next to me, breathing, and when I knew perfectly well that he hadn't been majorly wounded? Memories of the evening before assaulted me. I could see my own fingers tremble as I had massaged ointment on the skin of his left arm and shoulder. I could remember how tensed he had been then. I winced in pain suddenly, as the cuts on my palms reminded me that they were still there. I shook my head, trying to shoo away the last remnants of the memory. My hands were shaking slightly. I could only wonder how the other would perceive my odd behaviour.

"It's alright you know." Bofur suddenly said and forced me to look up at him.

He wasn't looking at me though. His eyes were staring at the dwarf sitting next to me, Nori. I was all too aware that Nori was probably as tense right now as I was. After all we were both sitting really close to each other, yet far enough that we wouldn't touch each other by mistake. It was maddening. If I leant a bit more in his direction, I could probably touch him, he could take me in his arms and hold me...

Bofur spoke again, helping me to change my trail of thoughts.

"I think we all know what's going on. And none of us will speak."

I frowned and looked at him. He had a kind smile ghosting on his lips. Glancing around I saw Bifur huff and nod before he took some wooden piece out and started to carve it. Then my eyes landed on Fili whose eyes were full of mischief again. He winked at me and decided to speak too.

"Yeah. You weren't very discreet back then. I didn't say a word to anyone though."

I blinked several times before glancing at the last dwarf who was there.

Nori was looking just as tense as I had thought he would be. He was staring at the ground and I could see how he was clenching his fists just as I had been earlier. He looked at me just then and I felt my breath catch in my throat. His grey eyes were shining with worry and pain. The longing I felt at this exact moment would have made my knees buckles if I had been standing. Instead it sent a shiver down my spine.

There was a second of silence before his hand shot in my direction and then very softly grazed my cheek. Without thinking I leant into this ghost of a touch. I longed for more. I ached for more. Slowly Nori slid closer to me and, his eyes trailed over my face, his hand following his gaze. Then he seemed to hesitate for a second before he took my hands in his and turned them palms up. All the while I stared at him. My eyes were riveted on his face, noting every little detail they could see. How his mouth seemed to be torn down in pain as he looked at my hands. How his braided eyebrows were almost meeting as he frowned, worry etched on every feature of his face. How his grey eyes seemed so bright. And then my gaze noted how the small bruise I had seen yesterday on his cheek had darkened. How the cut on his forehead had stopped to bleed. How he had somehow taken the time to clean the soot away from his beard and hair. This last one made me smile softly as I freed my right hand from his and started to mimic his earlier actions. I let my fingers ghost over his skin before I let them trail over his beard. My heart welled up with love as I spotted some colour appear on his cheeks as I did that.

Our gaze met right then and we both leant to let our forehead touch. I sighed contentedly then closed my eyes.

Those little touches had apparently been enough to calm my irrational need.

"Will it be alright?"

Nori's voice was hoarse and barely above a whisper as his hand lightly squeezed mine.

I opened my eyes again and we both leant back, so we were now closer to each other. I looked down at my hands and felt a spike of anxiety.

"I hope so." I replied, my voice almost completely strangled by unvoiced fear. "It should be." I added, trying to convince myself.

The truth was that it really should, but the cuts had been really bad. The flesh was torn more than cut. I couldn't be certain that it would be better. Yesterday, Oin and I had decided that for that night we would just place some ointment and bandages and check again the following day. I hadn't removed the bandages yet, but I honestly was a bit afraid of what I would find underneath. My hands were my most precious tools. If they didn't work properly, how could I expect to stitch wounds, or worse, to perform any sort of operations?

I bit my lower lip, trying hard not to think about the worst that could happen.

"Mizimul." Nori brokenly whispered in my ear as he hugged me. "I'm sorry I wasn't there."

I hugged him back and nuzzled his neck. Even the pain in my chest didn't seem so terrible right now and I didn't even flinch.

"It'll be fine." I heard myself murmur. "You've helped a lot already."

His derisive snort made me realize that Nori felt truly terrible. I leant further back and, having somehow forgotten about the others, observed Nori. He didn't meet my gaze and I immediately caught that he felt ashamed. My brain started to work faster to put pieces back together until I finally had a hunch.

"Nori." I called him in a whisper, trying to force him to look at me. "You helped a lot. Without your help, I wouldn't have survived all those trials. How could I? I can hardly believe I survived." I wasn't whispering anymore, I didn't care if our friends heard those words. To be perfectly honest, I had simply forgotten they were here. When I was so focused on Nori, nothing else mattered. "Had it been a year or two ago, I would have died at the first hardship, and now look at me. I fought against those creatures and lived to tell the story. Ain't that something? Without your help, I wouldn't be alive. I know it."

I tenderly cupped his cheek and smiled, trying to let him know how much he meant. I noticed the slight blush on his face and how he quickly glanced around. Suddenly reminded that we weren't really alone, I felt a blush of my own heat my cheeks. With just a glimpse I was reassured to see that none of the others were currently looking at us. Our friends were clearly trying to give us some privacy without actually leaving. Though I saw that, even if they weren't looking at us, the three dwarves were still listening and agreeing with me.

"You were left alone." Nori whispered shamefully, bringing my attention fully back on him.

His hand held my arm a bit tighter as I caressed his cheek with my thumb.

"Not for long." I tried to placate him.

"You almost died." He spat angrily, though his anger wasn't directed at me. I could easily tell he was angry at himself. I couldn't let that happen though.

"You too."

"Mizimul…" It sounded like he was begging me and it unsettled me greatly.

Without really thinking I gritted my teeth and, ignoring the pain in my limbs, I kneeled near him. Gingerly I hugged him, pressing his head on my collarbone. I placed a kiss on his forehead and started to let my fingers trail in his hair before I whispered as softly as I could.

"I'm alive." I murmured hoarsely.

I repeated those words as Nori hid his face in my neck and held onto me tightly. I forced myself to stay still, but oddly enough I wasn't in such pain even though he was holding me with a lot of strength. He was crushing me against him but it didn't hurt. This unexpected show of weakness made my heart melt. It forced me to realize once again how much I meant for him. Apparently I wasn't the only one who felt very odd and extremely strong feelings.

We remained like this for long minutes before Bofur cleared his throat, reminding us yet again that we weren't alone. Obviously being with Nori made me forget a lot of things.

I looked at Bofur who was blushing slightly..

Sheepishly he offered me a soft, apologizing smile.

"The others could start to come back any moment now."

He didn't need to say more. Slowly, cautiously, Nori and I moved away from one another. I cringed at the sudden pain that awoke in my body as I lowered myself back in a sitting position. Nori's sharp eyes saw it and he helped me.

"Do you need anything?" His hand stayed a bit longer than necessary on the small of my back.

"No, I'll ask Oin to help me later."

He nodded and sat back, far enough again for us not to touch and I felt my heart clench painfully. We all remained silent for a short while. I was observing the dwarves around me and suddenly felt curious.

"How did you know?" I blurted out without thinking.

Fili quirked an eyebrow at me. Clearly he found my question unbelievable. Bofur let out a chuckle and his eyes shone with mischief as he stared at me.

"Amelia, you're really cute sometimes."

I blushed.

I didn't feel complimented in the least by his sentence. Cute here seemed to mean stupid more than anything else. I glared at Bofur, though I wasn't really angry, more annoyed.

"As I said, you guys weren't really discreet during our mission in Archet." Fili shrugged before taking his pipe out of his inside pocket. "And from what I've seen so far, it's easy to guess the rest."

"The rest?" I repeated unsure of what he meant.

Of course it was obvious that he had somehow guessed my attraction to Nori during our mission together. I could now tell objectively that, hadn't I been so oblivious, I would have realized sooner that Nori was feeling the same way. Now that I thought about it though, I could only wonder at my stupidity. Was it normal that my brain had come up with so many silly theories when it was so obvious now that Nori had suffered the same way I did? Frowning, I didn't say a word as I kept thinking. I didn't pay attention to the way Bofur was coughing, or how Nori was glaring at a surprised Fili. What could he mean by the rest? Did he mean that it was easy to see how Nori and I would end up confessing our feelings? Or did he mean something else?

Fili's stammering voice was what forced me to look up.

"Ah…well, the rest…you know, erm, yeah…"

I looked at him with wide eyes. My brain was, for once, working seemingly fast. I observed my friends and Nori. Suddenly I was hit with the certainty that they were hiding something from me. And from the look of it, this was something big and it concerned my relationship to Nori.

"Alright, what's going on?" I asked with a deep frown on my face.

"Nothing you should worry about for now." Nori was the quickest to reply.

My eyes immediately met his.

I was surprised to see him look at me sternly. There was no doubt he wouldn't budge on this. Nori was keeping something from me. Something that concerned the both of us. I didn't like it one bit. I could easily live with the fact that the other dwarves kept information from me concerning the quest. I didn't mind it really, if the older dwarves were having discussions together about the rest of our journey. I wasn't their leader, I was merely a healer in their company so they had no reason to keep me informed about all the little details pertaining to this quest. But this was about something entirely different. I could feel it. This wasn't about the quest at all. What was it about though?

"But clearly it's something worrisome." I retorted in a rather cold tone, letting him know I didn't appreciate being left in the dark.

Fili cringed, feeling obviously guilty as he sent Nori an apologetic look. Bofur wasn't saying anything, suddenly finding his thumbs very interesting. Nori met my gaze without blinking and I knew for sure he would not tell me something he didn't want to. I turned slightly to look at the last dwarf, Bifur, who sighed loudly.

" Id-alnâs." He gruffly said, pointing at me before he gestured between me and Nori.

I blinked. I was certain I had never heard those words before. Well, by that I meant that no one ever taught them to me. My gaze quickly took in the faces of the others. Fili was trying hard to look at anything but at us. I could tell that he wasn't feeling comfortable at all. His cheeks were slightly pink. Bofur on the other hand was clearly struggling to contain his laugh. His eyes were shining with mirth. I felt both my eyebrows go up to my hairline. This situation was turning into something quite strange. So this wasn't some sort of worrisome information then? Bofur wouldn't laugh about something that would truly endanger us.

As I slowly turned to look at Nori, I was once more surprised by the sight that awaited me. Nori's face was red. He was glaring at the ground, looking more embarrassed than I had ever seen him. I probably made a sound, though it wasn't conscious, because he quickly looked at me and cleared his throat.

"Don't worry about it Amelia."

Bifur sighed loudly and shook his head, grumbling lowly. Bofur chuckled and told him something I didn't catch in Khuzdul. Bifur growled something back and I startled as I heard Nori snap something at him. They were arguing in Khuzdul and I had no idea what the discussion was truly about, except that it probably was linked to me somehow.

Glancing towards Fili, I was surprised to see him look slightly embarrassed. I frowned.

"What's going on?" I asked loud enough for the arguing dwarves to hear.

"I said, don't worry about it!" Nori snapped at me before his eyes grew wide. I could easily guess he hadn't realized he was snapping at me when he used that tone because he immediately looked worried and apologetic. "Amelia, I …"

"Don't!" I glared at him.

I honestly didn't like the fact that he would dismiss me like this. Now that I thought about it, it was far from the first time. Actually, he did it quite often. It wasn't only him. Dori too would sometime just tell me not to worry and dismiss me completely. As if I was a child. I felt anger bubble in me as the three dwarves were suddenly completely silent.

"Amel…" Nori tried again.

"Stop. Don't bother apologizing or explaining." I said rather coldly. "I don't care."

He was looking at me with wide eyes, clearly surprised with my outburst. To be perfectly honest, I was a little bit surprised by it too. It wasn't so often that I would let myself get angry so easily. And especially not at Nori.

But clearly, today was a brand new day, and angry I was.

"You're always telling me not to worry. Clearly there's something happening that I know nothing of and that you're all keeping from me." I growled at them. "And in case you were wondering, I don't like it." I snapped before looking at Bifur again. "Bifur, can you repeat that word please?"

The three dwarves were slightly stunned, all except Bifur who was looking at me smugly.

"Id-alnâs." He repeated calmly.

I mouthed it silently, trying to decipher what it could mean. Then Bifur gestured towards me and wrote runes in the dirt with his finger while repeating the same word again. Genuinely curious, I leant and looked at the symbols. I couldn't help but find them slightly familiar.

"What does it mean?" I asked, looking at Nori, Bofur and Fili in turn.

Neither of them seemed interested in telling me. I groaned and narrowed my eyes at Nori.

"Should I ask Dori? Or Balin?" Somehow I knew instinctively that this would sound like a threat.

"No!" Nori, Bofur and Fili exclaimed at once.

I quirked an eyebrow at them and Nori sighed. I was shocked to see him rub his face as he groaned. He was blushing and seemed embarrassed. It was almost shocking to see him this way.

"Amelia, please, now isn't the time to talk about this." His tone was almost begging. "I swear I'll explain everything, but please, for now, let it go."

"Lass…it's not really the right time to speak about these things." Bofur added sadly.

"These things?" I repeated questioningly. "Because of the quest you mean?" I sighed.

"Aye. Once we're all settled in Erebor, then you'll be able to ask Nori all the questions you want." Bofur said, a small glint of mischief in his eyes.

Nori sighed loudly before taking my hand in his.

"Please, be patient."

I frowned. I didn't really like this. In fact, I hated to be kept in the dark. Still, I couldn't say no to Nori. Not when he was looking at me with those big, begging eyes.

"Alright." I finally relented. "But once we're in Erebor, you better tell me everything or else." I pointed a menacing finger at him.

"I promise."

The discussion had to end here. From the corner of my eye, I saw Bofur erasing the word from the dirt as little by little the other dwarves arrived. Soon after, Bofur, Bifur, Nori and Fili left for the river too and I ended up sitting with Kili, Ori and Bilbo. The minutes passed by slowly and I couldn't help but feel quite jittery. It was odd. I should have enjoyed the calm and time to recover. But on the contrary it made me anxious. Even though I was exhausted and injured, I wanted nothing more than to stand back up and go. The pain in my limbs and stomach was far from forgotten, but it seemed unnatural for us all to be there, waiting with no true purpose, while we knew that orcs were chasing us.

Around lunch time, I just couldn't stand it anymore. I had to do something. In the end, I decided to check everyone's injuries. It could have been surprising that they let me, but at the time, my mind was completely focused. Even Thorin didn't comment much when I told him to sit straight and let me work.

It was obvious that I wasn't the only one feeling slightly unnerved. But contrarily to me, the dwarves were busy making or carving equipment we needed to replace. We had lost almost everything in the goblins' tunnels. My beloved staff was among the lost items. I had apologized to Gloin about it, but he had shrugged and gruffly told me not to worry about it. Gimli would be happy to help make another one, he had said.

While the others were busy carving plates, bowls and spoons, and I was checking their injuries, Oin was looking around, collecting plants. Bilbo soon joined him in this enterprise and they managed to find some useful herbs that we could use. My supplies were running low. I had blushed when the king had made comments about my idea to strap my satchel on me. It seemed that no one had expected it.

As the hours ticked by, it was obvious to everyone that we wouldn't spend the whole day here, much less the night.

"Is it really wise to leave this place now?" Balin wondered as he spoke with Gandalf, Gloin, Dori, Thorin and Dwalin.

"We shouldn't waste anymore time." Thorin growled.

"We're all able to walk." Dwalin agreed.

I felt their eyes on me at this moment, but I ignored it as Oin was showing me a way to make an ointment with fresh plants.

"We won't be able to walk far, but that still better than staying here."

"As I said earlier, I know of someone who lives nearby." Gandalf then chose to comment. "He might be of help."

"Might?" Thorin repeated.

"He doesn't care much for dwarves." Gandalf snorted. "But we need supplies, and his help would be more than welcome."

I exchanged a glance with Oin, but the old dwarf shrugged. It didn't cease to amaze me how Gandalf would speak to Thorin. He never hesitated to call the king stubborn or annoying. He never sugar coated his words. He was blunt and let the dwarves know he didn't agree with them. He even ordered them around somehow. It was shocking for me. The dwarves really seemed to respect him. I had to admit that the man, or wizard, was impressive. I could remember him fight in the goblins' tunnels. He had even performed some magic. I still could barely believe I had witnessed that.

That man was influential.

He was important.

I could tell without having to think too much about it.

As we ate, Thorin told us all we would leave right after lunch.

I schooled my features not to let show what I thought of that. To be perfectly franc I knew it was the right thing to do. But knowing it didn't mean I felt good about it. Every move I made was painful. It hurt to even breathe. My body was black and blue. I was still in pain and the thought of having to go on with our quest made me blanch. Yet I couldn't do anything about it. Keeping up with the dwarves would be difficult, but I had no choice. I wanted to fit in, so now was the time to prove I could. I might not be a dwarf, but I wasn't about to become a hindrance to them. I would show them that even a human could be resilient.

As we walked, my mind was busy thinking about the discussion I had with Fili, Bofur, Bifur and Nori. I couldn't help it. Something was bothering Nori. It wasn't new and I had known that for awhile. But now I knew that Bofur and Bifur weren't part of those that actually bothered him, or thought that we shouldn't be together. I couldn't believe that Kili would have a different opinion than Fili. The two brothers were too much alike, and besides Nori wouldn't worry about them. In his eyes, Fili and Kili were little more than kids. Similarly, it would be odd for Bombur to be against me and Nori. The chef didn't strike me as someone who would even bother thinking twice about it. I was certain he would just be happy for me and Nori.

I couldn't fathom who wouldn't allow me to be with Nori. Would it be Thorin? The king was opinionated enough for that. And with Nori's previous occupation, it seemed to be the most logical answer. Nori wanted to prove himself to our King. But why would Thorin bother thinking about such topics? And why wouldn't he allow me to stay with Nori? The more I thought about it, the less it seemed to make any sense.

Then the runes written by Bifur flashed through my mind. I was certain I had seen them before. But where?

Keeping my mind busy had been good in a way. I didn't see the time pass. I didn't think about the pain I felt. It helped a lot. Still, I was undoubtedly glad to stop that evening.

The following day, we all walked more or less in silence. Gandalf was leading us through a dense forest that finally gave way to some magnificent pastures. The grass was high and still a bright green. Colourful flowers of all sorts were blossoming. I immediately felt at ease. It was really strange, but I instantly liked this place. In the distance I could see trees growing high on a small hill. On top of that hill, it wasn't hard to see the grey smoke going high in the blue sky.

As we kept walking, Gandalf decided to break the silence.

"We're now on Beorn's territory. This is his land, his pasture and his animals. You would be wise not to hunt or take anything here without his consent."

As he spoke we finally arrived at the bottom of the hill. There he stopped and turned around to look at us. He frowned a bit and seemed to ponder on something. Then he grunted, as if agreeing to a thought he hadn't voiced and nodded to himself.

"Bilbo, Amelia, you'll come with me first." He said, looking at the two of us. "We do not want Beorn to feel like we're invading his territory."

"He doesn't sound like a friend." Gloin growled.

"He doesn't like dwarves." Gandalf stated simply. "So you're going to wait for Amelia, Bilbo and me to be up there, and then only you'll come up. In pairs. One pair at a time. You won't enter the house unless I call for you though." He added with a frown, clearly worried the dwarves wouldn't listen to him. "And remember, only come in pairs!" He insisted.

"Why should Amelia go up first if this man is so dangerous?" Ori piped in.

"Because she's human. And a woman. Beorn won't harm her. I'd be more worried for myself if I were you." Gandalf groaned before gesturing for me and Bilbo to follow him.

I blinked. I had to swallow back the lump that was forming in my throat as I automatically followed behind the hobbit. He didn't seem to like the situation either. For my part, I felt terrible for leaving the dwarves behind. I didn't like it one bit. I hated it. I felt as if I was being torn from where I was supposed to be. Glancing at Gandalf, I could only feel anxious when I saw how serious he was. Clearly the wizard wasn't sure what the outcome of our meeting will be.

"Gandalf?" Bilbo's anxiety was heard easily.

The wizard glanced down toward the hobbit before Bilbo asked his questions.

"Who's Beorn? Does he live here alone?"

"Beorn is a skinchanger." The wizard replied evenly, as if those words would explain everything.

"A skinchanger?" I couldn't help but repeat, honestly unsure of what he meant.

Suddenly I wanted nothing than to turn around and run back down towards the dwarves. What in Mahal's name could a skinchanger be? Was it even natural? It sounded...creepy.

"Sometimes he is a tall, strong man, sometimes he's a huge, black bear." Gandalf explained relatively calmly.

I staggered slightly and hissed when Bilbo helped me, the quick jolt was enough to send tendrils of pain in my ribcage. We exchanged a glance. Looking at my friend's bewildered face was enough to let me know that, no, skinchangers weren't usual in this world either. My head felt light at the simple thought of someone able to morph himself into another creature. I couldn't really grasp this new information. How could I? It wasn't…natural. It was magic. The healer in me thought it was impossible, yet I had witnessed too many impossible events and seen too many impossible creatures to doubt that such a thing could potentially exist.

Of course many things had already shocked me to the core since I appeared in this world. Elves, trolls, orcs and goblins were already magical enough. The giant eagles weren't too bad and well, I did live with dwarves. But still. This was yet another being that seemed just impossible to comprehend. My brain was trying hard to rationalize this. Maybe Gandalf spoke metaphorically. Somehow I doubted it, but well, a girl could hope.

As I was trying to comprehend just how someone could physically modify his body through his own will, I didn't realize we had walked all the way to the top of the hill.

I looked around.

We were in a clearing now. The house in the middle was entirely made of wood. The door was quite high, even Gandalf seemed short next to it. The roof was made of hatch and there was a chimney from which grey smoke came. We were currently on a small dirt path that led directly to the house, though I could see a fork that went to the back. Otherwise green grass and flowers beds surrounded the house. A movement on the right caught my eye and I just had enough time to turn and see a bunny disappear behind a bush.

I heard a neigh and could only guess that Beorn had at least one horse. As soon as I thought about that, I saw several of them trotting from behind the house. As they saw us, they neighed again before turning back and trotting away. As soon as they left, the door opened and an impossibly tall man came out.

"Who are you? What are you doing here?" His tone wasn't really menacing, but it was far from friendly.

I saw Bilbo hide behind Gandalf as I stopped. The wizard walked closer and cleared his throat.

"Good afternoon master Beorn. You may have heard of me. I am Gandalf the Grey."

"I'm no master, and I don't know you." The huge man frowned.

I couldn't help but stare at him with wide eyes as I held my breath. This man had bushy eyebrows, an incredible mane of dark hair and a beard, but unlike the dwarves, they were...well, wild. He was wearing a very simple linen shirt and trousers. A simple look at the size of his arms was enough to tell me that he wasn't just tall, but strong too. Really strong.

While I observed him, he was clearly observing us too. His frown didn't leave his face and suddenly he bent to grab something, an immense axe, and narrowed his eyes at Gandalf who sputtered before finding his words again.

"Ah well, you might know my friend and colleague more. His name is Radagast the Brown. He lives in the southern borders of Mirkwood." Clearly, Gandalf sounded hopeful.

The giant narrowed his eyes some more and finally nodded.

"I heard of him. Not a bad fellow." He pointed at me then and at Bilbo. "Who are the two little ones?"

Gandalf cleared his throat yet again and smiled before side stepping, forcing Bilbo to face Beorn.

"They are my travel companions. Allow me to introduce you mister Bilbo Baggins from the Shire. And miss Amelia a human from the Blue Mountains."

"You're short for a human." Beorn stared at me with a frown.

"My mother was too." I replied, proud to hear that my voice didn't sound nearly as anxious as I felt. "Pleasure to meet you." I added, guessing that the dwarvish greetings shouldn't be used with him. Gandalf had said that Beorn didn't care much for dwarves after all.

He grunted and looked at Bilbo who bowed his head and cleared his throat.

"It is a pleasure to meet you, mister Beorn." Bilbo said without faltering.

"A wizard, a human girl and a halfling. What are you doing here?" Beorn repeated.

I looked at Gandalf who seemed to be thinking quite hard, though he kept smiling. It seemed that even the wizard wasn't sure what was going to happen. Clearly this Beorn wasn't an enemy, but he really didn't seem friendly. Actually, even the elves had been more welcoming than he was. I had no doubt that Beorn wouldn't think twice about kicking us out of his domain.

"Well, you see, me and my friends were travelling from the west to the east when we came upon a small problem in the mountains. But I don't want to bother you with this story. It is rather long after all." Gandalf said calmly.

"A story?" Beorn repeated. "Is it an interesting one?" He looked at me as he spoke and I felt obliged to reply.

"Well, some might think so." I let out, slightly hesitant as I had no idea what this man could find interesting.

"It is certainly not dull." Bilbo agreed in a small voice.

The giant man looked from Bilbo to me and then nodded.

"Then come in." Beorn gestured for us to follow him as he turned, left his huge axe leaning against the wall, and pushed the door to his house open.

From Gandalf relieved sigh, I could tell that this first contact wasn't too bad. I wondered though what would happen when the dwarves would start to arrive. The first pair probably left already and would soon be there. Without waiting, we followed Beorn and Gandalf in.

The inside of the house was rather impressive. Everything was made of wood and was proportionate to the size of his owner. I would probably have trouble to sit on top of the bench or chair. Actually, even Gandalf struggled a bit. Glancing around, I smiled. I liked this house. Herbs and flowers were hanging from the ceiling, drying. The large table in the middle was nicely carved. There was a large hearth on the left side with a small fire currently burning and I could hear water bubbling in the cauldron that hanged in there. Two chairs were near the hearth, and there were benches and stools around the table. On the walls, shelves were full of jars and tools. Further at the back, there was a small door, and another one on the right side. I could guess that one probably was the bedroom.

I didn't have time to look anymore around as Beorn helped Bilbo to sit on the bench. As he turned to grab my waist, as he had done to Bilbo, I stopped him. I felt myself blush a bit and quickly apologized for my apparent rudeness.

"I am sorry mister Beorn. But I hurt myself during our adventure."

"An adventure?" He asked before gently seizing my waist and carefully lifting me up.

I was genuinely surprised to see him handle me so delicately. I didn't hurt at all. Actually I felt like I was a china doll. How could a man his size be so gentle with someone so little compared to him? I blushed some more as he cautiously placed me on the chair closest to the hearth. Just after that he sat in the second one.

"So, tell me about this adventure." He grunted as he sat.

"Well, as I said, our adventure began in the west." Gandalf started. "And nothing much happened there, well until we met three trolls."

"Trolls? In the west? And three of you managed to defeat them?" Beorn snorted, obviously not believing it.

"Well, we travel with some more companions." Gandalf admitted cautiously.

I swallowed nervously and looked at Bilbo. Obviously the hobbit was as lost as I was. Looking once more at Beorn, I saw him quirk an eyebrow as he leant on the armchair.

"Where are they?" He asked gruffly.

"Well, we didn't want to be rude and so, they stayed behind." Gandalf smiled kindly as Beorn shrugged.

"Call for them then." He said before ignoring Gandalf once again and staring at me and Bilbo. "Do you want milk?"

The question made me blink. I honestly hadn't expected it. It felt like I hadn't had milk in ages. We didn't have that much of it in the Blue Mountains. Milk was expensive. We couldn't afford to buy fresh milk every day, and the dwarves obviously didn't have pasture and cows. Bilbo started to stammer an answer.

"Hem, we" He looked at me before clearing his throat. "We really don't want to bother you." He finally let out.

Beorn didn't say a word and grunted. Swiftly he stood up and in quick strides went out of the room, into the one in the back and quickly came back with two goblets and a pitcher. Wordlessly he poured milk in the goblets and handed them to Bilbo and I. I had to use both hands to hold it. What had looked like a simple goblet in the giant's man hand, looked like a pitcher in mine.

"Thank you." Bilbo and I chorused, but Beorn shrugged as if he truly didn't care.

"So, how did you get rid of the trolls?" Beorn asked as he sat back.

Gandalf was just coming back from the door.

"Gandalf used the sun to turn them into stones." Bilbo replied.

In the meantime I took a sip and was surprised by the taste. The milk was warm and creamy. I loved it. I didn't realize it, but a huge smile came on my face and I drank some more before I finally saw that Beorn was staring at me. Immediately I blushed and his gaze turned back to Gandalf who was now back in his seat.

"So you turned them into stone?"

"Yes." Gandalf nodded as someone knocked at the door and opened it.

Beorn barely glanced towards Dwalin and Balin as they bowed and greeted him.

"Dwarves?" Was all he said as he glared at Gandalf.

Gandalf was already relating the events that came next.

"Yes, some of our friends are dwarves, and we were all lucky to escape the trolls. But those trolls were easy to get rid of. No, no. We started to really have trouble when we crossed the mountains. My friends and I got separated and they ended up facing stone giants. Several of the dwarves got stuck on the giant while it moved."

"You call two, several?" Beorn narrowed his eyes at Gandalf.

"Well, they are more than two actually."

And so started a very odd conversation. I realized what Gandalf was doing. He kept Beorn busy and entertained with our adventure, letting him know little by little that there were still more of our companions outside. By the time he was talking about the eagles, all the dwarves were sitting silently on the floor. Bilbo, Gandalf and I were the only guests sitting on chairs. I could feel Nori's eyes on me as I slowly and happily drank the milk. I didn't feel too bad about it. I was certain that Beorn would offer some to the dwarves once the tale was over. He was very strange, and he would sometimes stare at me. But all in all, I found him, well, interesting.

He wasn't like the dwarves, and definitely not like the elves. He was completely different from the other people I had met so far. I still wasn't sure whether this was a good thing or not, but at the very least it was interesting.

I didn't pay much attention to the end of Gandalf's tale. But I did look around when Beorn sat back and spoke.

"Well. That's quite an adventure you had." He merely stated before looking at the dwarves. "I don't like you." He said as his gaze didn't falter. "But I will allow you to stay here. You will be able to sleep and rest. Then you will be on your way."

"We thank you for your help." Gandalf said before any dwarf could take offense.

"Do not get out of this house when it's dark outside." Beorn ordered before once more looking at me.

I shifted a bit uneasily on my chair. I didn't know why the giant kept on looking at me. It made me slightly uncomfortable. Slowly, he extended his hand in my direction. From the corner of my eye I could see the dwarves were tense. Beorn grabbed the pitcher and simply put it back on the table. Then he tilted his head and huffed.

"Do you want to go down?" He asked, gesturing between me and the ground.

Looking down I saw the height I would have to jump if he didn't help me. Instead of trying I chose to nod.

"Could you please be kind enough to help me?" I looked at him with a small, apologetic smile.

He didn't say a word but nodded. Once again his large hands picked me up slowly and gingerly. I quickly found myself with my two feet back on the wooden floor. Craning my neck to look up, I offered the tall man a bright smile.

"Thank you sir."

"Beorn." He gruffly said before turning his back to us and leaving the house.

I saw him grab his axe and balance it on his shoulder before he turned away. He had left the door open, which was enough of a sign that we were allowed to go outside for now. I wondered why we were banned to do so during the night, but I was certain that we would soon find out. If not, we probably would be able to ask Beorn later. It was really, really odd, but I couldn't help but like this strange giant.

He was so very different to anyone I had met before. Yet there was something about him that just made me like him. His eyes were kind when he looked at me.

"Amelia, are you alright?"

Ori's voice tore me out of my thoughts. I smiled at him and nodded.

The dwarves were presently looking around. They were all otherwise occupied and didn't pay much attention to me. Not that I needed them to. I glanced up to the ceiling and saw the different plants that were drying there. I recognized some, but plenty of them were unknown to me.

I hesitated for a minute.

I wasn't sure that I should do what I had in mind. Still, it couldn't hurt to try. I took as deep a breath as I dared and slowly made my way outside. The dwarves were talking together in small groups. Before I stepped outside, I saw that, once again, Thorin, Dori, Balin, Gloin and Dwalin were talking together. This time though, Gandalf had joined them and they all seemed to listen rather intently to him. They were standing at a safe distance from the other and it really made me curious. I decided I would ask Dori later. For now, I had set myself another goal.

The air outside was still warm, even though the sun was already starting to go down in the sky. From what I could guess, it was still the middle of the afternoon. I looked around. Beorn was nowhere in sight. Remembering that I had seen him turn around, I followed the trail to the back of the house. Soon enough, I realized that the house was longer than I had thought. I could hear a sharp noise that seemed quite regular and decided to go in that direction. I arrived at the corner of the house to a scene that didn't surprise me. Beorn was simply busy cutting wood. I could see that there were two other buildings, though they were far smaller than the house was. Looking to my left, I startled, seeing that there were massive doors that took almost the whole wall on this side of the house. As the doors were slightly ajar, I took the liberty to glance inside.

It was a stall.

I could see cows and the horses from earlier. They were munching on some hay. It wasn't really a surprise. The milk had to come from somewhere after all. As Beorn was busy, I decided not to disturb him until he saw me or acknowledge my presence and simply sat with my back against the wall. I winced at the pain that shot through my body and sighed once I closed my eyes and simply basked in the sun. After a few minutes, my ears caught on a soft noise nearby. Glancing at my right, I couldn't stop a smile as I saw two dogs observing me. I beckoned them over silently.

It took them several minutes before they approached.

"Hello." I whispered in the closest one's ear as I rubbed his head. "How are you? You look friendly enough. Do you have a name?"

I sounded ridiculous. I knew. But honestly, I didn't care. I loved dogs. Well, I loved animals in general, but I had a soft spot for dogs. I couldn't help it. I wasn't paying much attention to my surroundings anymore. I enjoyed petting the dogs too much and I was busy as the two of them fought for my attention.

"Do you want something little one?" Beorn asked as he let his axe fall on the log, cutting it in half.

It almost startled me to remember he was there too.

"I do not mean to bother you." I said at first, but as he didn't reply and kept on cutting wood, I continued. "I was just wondering if the plants you dried were medicinal ones."

"Some are." He placed the halves neatly in a pile before grabbing another log. "Why do you want to know?"

"I'm a healer." I replied evenly. "I'm always interested to learn something new."

Somehow, that sentence made him stop. He turned to face me. I swallowed thickly when I saw his piercing stare riveted on me. He unnerved me a bit, even though I somehow couldn't help but instinctively trust him. It crossed my mind that it had been a similar situation when I had met Dori, Nori and Ori. Even though at the time I hadn't had much choice, I still had trusted them fairly quickly and instinctively. The same schema was repeating itself here. I trusted Beorn. I had no idea why, but I did. How odd.

The silence stretched between us as we were both lost in our own thoughts.

Beorn was the first to speak.

"Why are you with the dwarves?"

His tone was gruff, almost sounding like an accusation. Yet I didn't take offense. Instead I chose to ask.

"Why do you want to know?"

"You're not like them." He leant on his axe. "Dwarves don't care much for beings they deem lesser to them. They only care about what can benefit them." He tilted his head a bit and pointed at me. "You aren't like that."

I frowned. As always when someone questioned the dwarves, I couldn't help but feel a bit annoyed. This time, it felt slightly different though. I looked at Beorn and genuinely curious, asked him another question.

"How could you know?"

He shrugged but didn't reply. He kept observing me and I stared right back at him until one of the dogs got annoyed at me and licked my hand. I looked down and smiled as I started to pet them again. This time I was the one to break the silence.

"They found me when I was alone. They took me in." I replied with a shrug before adding softly, looking at the dogs. "They saved me."

Beorn grunted.

Our discussion seemed to consist mostly of long stretches of silence. Neither of us spoke for awhile. It felt oddly peaceful.

"You said you were injured." Beorn suddenly stated.

I nodded and sighed. Looking at his serious face, I decided to elaborate a bit.

"My ribs are bruised. I might have cracked one too. And I got cuts." I showed my bandaged hands as he nodded.

"There's a bathtub in there." He pointed at one of the smaller building. "I'll fill it with hot water and herbs."

I blushed deeply and shook my head.

"You don't need to do that. I'm …" I couldn't finish as Beorn interrupted me.

"You want to know what some of those plants do? You'll try their effects yourself. Wait here." Without further ado, he left me there.

I had no idea what to do or how to react.

As Beorn had left already, I chose not to move from my spot. The two dogs were lying with their heads on my legs. Letting my head rest against the wall, I closed my eyes. So many things had happened in such a short time. I could barely believe that I had survived so far.

It all seemed so impossible.

The trolls at first had been quite the challenge and they still gave me shivers every time I thought of them. The smell of meat still made my stomach revolt. Yet, thanks to the dwarves, I was safe. Then it had been the orcs, and later the elves. This world truly was amazing. It felt as if I had stepped in some fantasy world. Sometimes I even wondered whether I was truly here, but the pain I felt in my limbs was enough to assure me I wasn't dreaming all this from a hospital bed.

The second part of our journey had been genuinely terrifying.

As soon as we had stepped in those mountains, it had turned into a nightmare. I shuddered at the memories. The giants, the goblins, the orcs again… I had been lucky to survive. I could have died a hundred times. This world really was dangerous. Suddenly the little adventures that I had before seemed so silly. Why had I been afraid of men, when creatures such as goblins existed? How could I have nightmares because I poisoned some random people, and not when I ran through a town full of goblins? I snorted. It seemed like the past two years had been filled with pleasant walks compared to this one journey.

I had never been so glad for all my training.

Clearly, without it I wouldn't have survived.

A sudden noise startled me out of my musing. Looking around, I saw Beorn come out of the small house, a large empty cauldron in hand.

"You can go now." He simply said before he turned away and left again.

Smiling I moved slowly, trying my best not to make any sudden movements that would hurt me. The dogs stayed at my side as I walked back to the main house. I had to let the dwarves know where I was.

Nori, Ori, Bofur, Bifur, Bombur, Fili and Kili were all outside. The older dwarves were smoking and talking together, laughing while Fili and Kili spared. Well, they were brawling more than sparing, but no one truly cared. They were laughing rather loudly too.

"Where were you?" Bofur asked as I came closer.

I knew they hadn't been worried. His question didn't mean much, except that Bofur was a truly curious dwarf. I smiled and gestured at my back.

"Back there with Beorn. He was kind enough to warm some water for me." I said before absentmindedly petting one of the dogs, they were really tall. "I'll go now."

The dwarves didn't say a word, simply nodding before I turned and walked back. Before I did, my eyes met Nori's. I couldn't help but smile as he smirked. He seemed better. Clearly, the fact that we were safe and relatively unharmed was finally making him relax a little. If we had been alone, I would have kissed him right then. But we weren't, so, after a small nod, I just left.

The dogs escorted me to the small house and sat at the door while I entered.

There wasn't much in there. On one side, I could see a huge wooden tub, and on the other a pile of wood. There were some shelves too and, next to the tub, a towel and a basket with a bar of soap and herbs. I smiled. Beorn truly seemed like a kind hearted man. He was gruff and a bit scary, but I was used to that now. I chuckled softly at the thought. It seemed strange that I ended up being used to gruff, grunting men. I threw the herbs in the bath and without wasting any time, I started the painful process of stripping. I winced several times and was panting by the time I stood naked in the small, dark house. I used a log as a makeshift step to enter the high tub. The water was steaming. It was blissfully warm and I didn't stop a moan. Mahal, I had missed this.

As I was about to sit, I realized I had forgotten to remove my necklace. I didn't want to damage it so I quickly detached it. Holding it in my hand as I slowly sat, I looked at it. As my fingers slowly touched the small beads, I realized that I knew the runes written on one of them. My eyes widened as I gasped. I knew those runes. I had seen them before. Suddenly, I was absolutely certain that those were the exact same runes written in the dirt by Bifur. Weeks, no, months ago, Nori had given me a necklace with beads engraved with that word. What could it possibly mean?

I was completely shocked.

I tried to guess what it could be, but I honestly had no idea. Well, it could mean anything really, and with my tendency to overreact I didn't want to start imagining things that weren't true or real. I had done so too many times in the past.

As I looked at the runes, I felt turmoil of feelings; giddiness at first, simply because I had recognized the runes. Then there was a huge part of me that was curious. Clearly, the word used by Bifur was important and true. I recalled how he had gestured between me and Nori as he said it. It probably was some sort of description, and clearly Nori agreed with it if he had offered me a present with that word. I was also feeling a bit smug. I couldn't help but smirk as I thought about Nori and how he would react when I would show him those runes. He would be obliged to tell me what they meant. It was thrilling. Chuckling happily I leant back and closed my eyes. I sighed loudly and smiled. I felt really good right then.

I remained in my happy bubble for as long as I dared. That meant I stayed in the bath until the moment the water turned cold. I felt so much better. My sore muscles were refreshed. I felt rested and relaxed. The cuts on my palms weren't closed at all, but at least they didn't seem infected. The smell of the fresh herbs in the bath had lulled me in a doze and I knew I would sleep perfectly well that night. At this moment, the rest of our journey didn't seem like an impossible challenge anymore. I would have to thank Beorn profusely.

I smiled softly as I attached my necklace once again and hid it under my tunic. Softly touching it, I felt my heart swell in warm feelings for the dwarf who had made it. Deciding not to waste anymore time, I quickly bandaged my hands again, though it was a bit tricky at first, with some fresh bandages I found in Beorn's basket. I was smiling softly as I opened the door and grinned at the dogs that had stayed there. They escorted me back to the main house. The sun was now descending low in the sky. The night would soon fall.

As I entered the large living room, I looked around. It somehow felt as if nothing could break the happy bubble around me. Fili and Kili were joking with Ori, Bilbo and Bofur near the hearth. Next to them, Nori and Bifur were busy whittling while Bombur simply sat there and seemed to be taking a nap. There was nothing wrong or strange with their behaviour. Everything was as it should be and I smiled some more. But then my gaze turned to fall on the other dwarves. They were on the other side with Gandalf. And as I looked at them I realized they were all staring at me. I couldn't help but startle a bit at their serious gaze and felt my step falter a bit. Strangely, even though I was still feeling the effects of this amazingly soothing bath, an odd, ominous feeling started to grow in my heart. I could almost hear voices in the back of my head whispering words I couldn't quite catch at the moment.

I shook my head, feeling silly. Nothing could or should break this cheerful and peaceful mood I was when I came in.

I was about to ask them what was going on when a noise distracted me. Beorn came in from the door in the back and his calm, piercing stare took in the whole scene.

I frowned as he seemed annoyed and when his piercing gaze fell on me, I suddenly felt frozen.

I had no true idea why, but my instincts were screaming at me that something was wrong.

Something had been wrong for days now. I knew. I had seen the strange looks the older dwarves sent my way. I wasn't that stupid.

As I was about to talk, Thorin stepped forward and came to stay a few meters away from me. As soon as he moved, my gaze broke from Beorn's and riveted on our King.

Immediately all the dwarves turned silent and looked at us.

The older ones were mostly frowning but clearly knew what was going on. Balin looked unhappy though, and quite sad too. Dori was obviously determined, as were Gloin and Dwalin. Oin was glaring, but I wasn't sure who he was glaring at. Nori and Bofur exchanged a glance, both frowning uncertainly while the others were clearly lost and unsure of what was going on. I, for my part, suddenly felt like a deer caught in the light. My heart was slowly but steadily starting to pound in my chest. Somehow I knew I wouldn't like the discussion I was about to have with the king. Still, I couldn't believe that my good mood would vanish completely. Nothing Thorin would say could possibly bring me down from such a happy and peaceful state.

"Amelia." He said sternly. "You're not going to go any further."

...What?

I blinked several times. At first I wasn't sure I had heard him clearly, but then my brain was working fast to try and make sense of those words. I felt stupid as I frowned and asked.

"What do you mean?"

"You are not coming with us." He sighed before he continued. "This quest isn't meant for women, let alone young, human girls. The past days proved it."

"But…" I blurted out.

This didn't make sense. Why was he saying that? I didn't understand. I was here. I was already here, with them. What did he expect me to do? I shook my head, trying to clear my frenzied mind.

"Wait...I'm," I stammered before a clear thought finally crossed my mind and I held onto it strongly. "But the contract. You can't…" I said before he interrupted me.

"Even though the contract was signed by my sister, I am the king. If she signed it in my name, then I am still able to cancel it. I didn't before simply because the dangers were still manageable." He calmly, coldly stated before adding. "In the past few days, it has been obvious that this quest is just too harsh for you." He explained in a detached way before he shrugged. "Anyway, the contract was lost in Goblins Town, so I can declare this accord completely void now."

My thoughts were in a mess. In some part of my mind I was wondering why he would come up with this solution now, why hadn't he thought of that when we were in Imladris? Even though I had almost died several times in the past week, so did they. But a bigger part of my brain was concentrating on the scary information it registered. I couldn't really fathom what was happening. I couldn't understand it. They couldn't mean that, not after all we'd been through. Not now. My heart rate was skyrocketing and I felt my mouth go dry. Some cynical voice in the back of my head noted that my happy bubble was completely gone now, but now wasn't the time to focus on that.

"You can't…" I repeated, suddenly afraid. "What do you mean?" I asked again, feeling lost.

"Amelia, I asked Beorn and he assured me that you could stay here for now." Gandalf intervened, his voice too kind to my taste.

I glared at him. It sounded as if he was considering me stupid. My glare turned to the king. My fear was slowly, but steadily morphing into anger. I closed my fists tightly as I felt my hands tremble.

"You can't mean that." I shook my head. "I'm your healer. I helped you out. I'm not useless." I wasn't sure whether I was trying to convince him or myself. "I can follow you."

From the corner of my eye, I saw that Bofur, Bombur, Bifur and Nori were now standing, frowning deeply. They didn't know, my brain whispered to me and somehow, it made me feel slightly better. I saw Bofur open his mouth, a deep frown on his usually smiling face.

"Enough!" Thorin snapped at the dwarf before he even talked. "Amelia, we've talked about it between us. We all think that this quest is too dangerous for you. Gandalf here says we can trust Beorn, and I'm sure you'll be perfectly safe with him. Gandalf assured us you would be safe here and, concerning that matter, I have no reason not to trust him. As your king, I swore to protect you." He emphasized on this last part before looking at me and continuing. "I swore to protect you and you swore to obey me. Now I order you to stay here, it's for your own good."

"You can't just leave me here!" I exclaimed, fear gripping my heart, unable to accept this situation.

"I won't have you follow us anymore." Thorin growled, he was obviously trying to stay calm though.

"Amelia, my dear, you surely realized how terribly dangerous this quest was." Balin kindly intervened. "Look at you, you almost died so many times." He shook his head sadly. "I can't in good conscious let you follow us."

Eyes wide, I looked at my two guardians. Dori was staring at the ground, obviously doing his best to avoid my gaze. Balin looked apologetic but clearly wasn't about to contradict his king. But I thought he trusted me? I thought he was proud of my achievements? He had encouraged me when I went on missions, supporting me when I trained. Why this sudden change?

"Amelia. We think it'll be better if you wait here. This quest wasn't meant for you." Dori ended up saying, and I knew he meant every word.

Realizing this was like being stabbed repeatedly in the gut. Did he not trust me either? Was it so easy for him to discard me that he wouldn't only do it once, but twice? He left me behind in the halls at first and now was planning to do it again in the middle of nowhere. Why? Hadn't I proved myself time and again? Hadn't I shown them I was strong? Didn't they think I was reliable?

"You're just a human, lass. It's not your fault, but it does make you weaker." Gloin grunted, obviously thinking this would placate me.

It didn't.

"I am not some old shoe you can discard like this!" I hissed angrily at the king, glaring once more at him and focusing all my anger on him, purposely ignoring my guardians and kin.

His eyes narrowed at me and if I hadn't been so furious, I would have recoiled in fear. I was afraid alright, but what frightened me was the thought that they would just leave like that, without me.

"I've had enough of you always discussing my orders." Thorin spat coldly. "I don't want to discuss this. I don't have to discuss my decisions with you. You are a guest in our halls, and you swore your obedience! So you'll do as I said! Your king, your guardians and your kin all think it best for you." His voice was tight with barely contained anger. "You will stay here." He emphasized this last sentence by pointing at the floor, eyes narrowing.

"You can't…" I had barely uttered those words that he snapped.

"I can and I am ordering you to stay here!" He exclaimed. "Do you want me to punish you? Do you want to know how dwarves punish insubordination?" He glared at me.

There was a collective gasp. Obviously dwarvish punishment weren't a good thing to experience. My heart clenched painfully. Suddenly, I could hear several voices in my head. Dís and Danà talking to me about dwarvish customs. Glorfindel, telling me that dwarves weren't to be trusted. Beorn finally, saying how dwarves weren't interested in weaker beings. I clenched my fists so tightly that pain shot through my palms.

"You wouldn't do this." I managed to articulate through gritted teeth. "You wouldn't punish me, it wouldn't make sense. Not if you really meant to protect me." My tone seemed almost accusing, and maybe it was.

Why would he punish me? Why? I only meant to help. It didn't make sense.

"Try me." Thorin eyes were cold, uncaring.

A sad reality dawned on me. He would. He definitely would.

I glared at the ground. I felt suddenly cold. I wouldn't say I felt numb or empty, because I wasn't, not really. Instead I was inhabited by cold fury. Before I could say anything else, Nori finally decided to speak up.

"We can't just leave her here." He blurted out, while Bofur hastily agreed with him.

"She can keep up. She has so far." The kind-hearted dwarf said, nodding at Nori's words.

"Enough Nori!" Dori glared at his brother. "Amelia can't come with us. As her guardian, I forbid her to." He growled angrily. "Balin and Gloin agree too. We all agreed. We don't need to know your opinion." He spat at Nori who glared right back at him.

My eyes were darting between all the dwarves as pain shot directly through my heart. They were all starting to argue, but it was clear that even my mentors, Oin and Dwalin, were against me coming with them. I had never known what betrayal felt like until this very moment. All those men I had trusted so much were so quick to leave me behind. How could they?

"How could you do that to me?" I accused Dori, Balin and Gloin, glaring at them. My voice was tight with barely contained emotions. "How?"

"Listen, Amelia," Dori took a step in my direction at the same time as I took a step back. "It is for your own good."

"Right..." I narrowed my eyes at him. "None of you actually trust me." I venomously spat.

Things were quickly escalating as more dwarves voiced their opinions loudly.

"Enough!" Thorin bellowed, effectively shutting everyone up. "She's not going any further and that's final!"

The room fell silent instantly.

"I helped you." I whispered but I knew he heard me. "I'm useful." I added a bit louder.

"We don't need you." He snorted derisively. "You should have stayed in the halls. This quest is no place for weak human girls." His voice grew cold as his smirk disappeared. "The past days only proved to me that you're nothing," He emphasized that last word before taking a deep breath and repeating it." You're nothing but a young helpless girl. You're a distraction we don't need." His eyes narrowed at me as he took a brief pause in his speech. "I won't have you jeopardize our entire quest. I won't have a human child tag along anymore."

His words stabbed me as a knife would. I inhaled sharply. He could have hit me and I would have been less hurt. His words were more painful than what I had been through this past week. Still glaring at the ground, it took me a minute to put a word on how I felt.

Betrayed.

Bitterly, I forced my hands to unclench.

"Do I need to repeat myself yet again?" He finally asked, his voice completely even and uncaring.

"No." I replied evenly, calmly.

I looked up slowly. My sight narrowed on him. I had never felt so much pain before. He was threatening to abandon me, but in all intent and purpose, he was doing it by leaving me behind. They were leaving me here, in the middle of nowhere, in some place they had never heard of before. They were abandoning me. And they all agreed...what a bitter thought it was, that they would just agree on such a thing. How could I ever accept such a betrayal? How could I even think of ever forgiving these dwarves who so easily discarded me?

My heart was throbbing in pain, muddling my brain. Breathing was hard as I was feeling emotions I had never experienced before.

To betray me like this…it was an unbearable pain. It was crippling. But the only thing I felt beside that terrible pain, was the raging fury that allowed me to still breath and stand.

I didn't stop to think and ponder on my next move. I didn't need to, didn't want to. My decision was taken. If they were able to discard me so easily, then so be it. If I didn't mean anything more than that to them, then so be it. If they could so easily leave me behind and walk away, then so be it.

If I couldn't trust them anymore...then so be it.

The air in the room was stiff. Everyone seemed frozen, as if no one dared breathe at all. Nori was obviously flabbergasted. The smug thief looked completely lost. He was the only one I looked at. I loved him. I loved him so much. But right then I suddenly felt tired. I was tired of hiding my feelings for him. I wasn't stupid. I knew Nori's uncertainty meant that some of the dwarves wouldn't agree with our couple. Somehow, right this instant I was persuaded that it was me they found inadequate.

I felt hollow.

Had those past two years been nothing but a dream?

Were the dwarves truly how the elves and Beorn had described them?

Had I been so blind?

As my gaze once more met with the cold, uncaring one of Thorin, I felt suddenly bitter. Extremely so.

Rage and pain clouded my thoughts.

They thought I wasn't good enough. They thought I was weak. I wasn't a dwarf after all, and never would I be one. All the pain I had been through, all the trainings, the efforts I put into fitting in, nothing seemed important to them. After all this time, I still wasn't accepted. I still wasn't worthy.

Bitterness and anger raged within my heart. I didn't need to think about my next action. My body acted almost on its own.

Ever so slowly I felt my hands come up to my temple.

Silently I grazed my braids. Then my resolve hardened.

In a matter of seconds, all it took for a few, harsh tugs really, I had torn several of my beads away from my braids.

"Amelia!" I heard several calls but I ignored them.

My gaze, riveted to the king's, didn't miss how his eyes widened at my gesture. I had in hands my kinship and my healer's beads. Slowly, I let them fall to the ground where they clanked loudly in the stiff silence. In one swift move, the large bead I wore in the back of my head followed them. I was left with only one braid.

"You know what it'll mean." Thorin said lowly.

"Of course." I said, my voice sounding as hollow as I felt.

And ignoring a few pained cries and several gasps, I removed the braid and let my guardians' beads fall to the ground.

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><p><strong>... :) I'll try my best to update sometimes in the next two weeks.<strong>

**Thanks to everyone supporting me, whether it's with your reviews or when you add me or my story in your follows or favourites.**


	54. Into the Woods

**Everything belongs to JRRTolkien, except the OC **

**Huge thanks to Eylanan who patiently beta-ed this chapter**

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><p>The beads hit the floor with a clinking noise that seemed to echo around. Balin and Dori looked horrified and their stares were riveted on the beads at my feet. Gloin was glaring at them while Oin looked at me sadly, almost disapprovingly. I didn't care. I chose not to look at any of them anymore. Ignoring them I turned away and stepped outside.<p>

My heart was beating too fast and I had trouble breathing. The pain I felt was mingling with rage. I couldn't really wrap my head around what had just happened. As I heard the door shut behind me, I blinked several times, trying to gather my bearings. What had just happened? Was this some sort of nightmare? Had I truly done what I thought I had? Danà's voice seemed to echo in my head as it finally dawned on me that yes, I had. I had just broken my word. I had just disowned everything those beads stood for. I had rejected them and along with them, the dwarves.

My hands were shaking and my knees felt weak. I still forced myself to take one, then two shaky steps. I had to keep moving, keep breathing, keep fighting. I had to keep living, even though I had currently no idea how to do so. What was I supposed to do now? My mind was completely blank as I struggled to find an answer to this suddenly tricky question. I felt like a drifting boat without an anchor. The dwarves had been everything, everything to me and now what? What was going to happen? What could I do? I was only certain of one little thing, I couldn't go back in and face them. I wouldn't be able to.

A keening noise escaped my throat before I could catch myself and stop it. Unsteadily I walked down from the porch and, closing my eyes, pressed the heels of my hands against them.

A whining noise startled me and made me look at my left where I was surprised to see the two dogs. They looked sad. I smiled stiffly at them and decided to trace back my earlier steps. Night was falling, the sun disappearing behind the horizon. I shivered and hugged myself, as if the simple gesture would help me keep it together. The dogs were pressed against my legs as I staggered along the way. I was barely five metres away when I heard several voices booming from inside the house before the door opened and was almost immediately loudly closed. I forced myself to ignore the muffled shouts and tried to focus on something else. Heavy steps started to follow the same path as the one I had taken.

I didn't need to look behind to know they didn't belong to any dwarf.

"Can I stay in the small house with the tub tonight?" I hollowly asked without looking behind me.

There was a long pause but I didn't really mind. It seemed at that moment that I didn't mind anything at all. My heart felt too heavy in my chest and my thoughts were all turning around one topic. Nothing could make me more awkward or hurt me more at that moment. Or at least it was what I thought. I didn't even care that the reply to my question took a while to be heard.

"Follow me." Beorn grunted before he passed by me.

He walked slowly in silence. I didn't know what to say, or if I should say anything, so I remained silent too. At that particular moment, my brain didn't seem ready to function properly and I was really glad that Beorn didn't try and speak with me. I followed him almost blindly until I realized he wasn't exactly going where I thought he would.

Instead of guiding me to the small house I already knew, he went to the second one. He opened the door and I stepped in with him. It was a shed he obviously used as a storage area. There was hay on the floor and in the back, shelves with jars and some more plants drying. I heard some noise coming from the back and realized that the two dogs had immediately ran there. I followed them and could only smile at the sight. There was another dog lying half hidden in the hay and four puppies around her.

"When were they born?" I couldn't help but ask as I knelt.

"A week ago." Beorn replied, observing me carefully.

Maybe he thought I was just about to fall apart. Maybe he wasn't entirely wrong.

The silence made me uncomfortable. Instead of looking at Beorn I knelt in the hay next to the puppies and extended my hand for them to sniff. Two of them immediately came forward but the other two looked a bit uncertain about what to do with me. I couldn't blame them. I shook my head, trying to rid it of the gloomy thoughts that threatened to overwhelm me.

While I was busy introducing myself to the dogs, Beorn was grabbing something from the highest shelves. I didn't pay much attention to him or the jar he had in his hands until he placed it down. Wordlessly, while I observed him, he turned around to open a high cabinet and took some obviously old blankets out. He threw them in the hay near me.

"I'll go get you some milk and bread." He grunted. "You'll be safe here. The hay and dogs will keep you warm."

"Thank you." I whispered, looking at the dogs.

He grunted and left. While I was alone, I stubbornly refused to think about what had just happened. I didn't want to. Not right now. I knew if I did I would start to cry and I really didn't want to appear weak in front of anyone anymore. Beorn's kindness was touching and I felt immensely grateful. He didn't have to help me. He didn't have to, but obviously he understood why I didn't want to be in the dwarves' presence right now. The four puppies managed to distract me, the two bravest ones were currently licking my fingers and the remaining ones were finally starting to come closer. My mind was almost blank while I stared at the animals. Right now, focusing on them had more appeal than thinking about everything else. Slightly startled, I looked up as I heard the door open and was relieved to see it was Beorn again. I honestly didn't want to see any of the dwarves right now. I had no idea what I would tell them or how I would react.

Beorn placed a pitcher and a loaf of bread on a small stool that was as high as a table for me. He took down from a shelf a tall candle he placed there too and he lighted it without saying anything. I could feel him looking at me but I didn't say a word either. I didn't know what to say. Besides, we weren't exactly close. I had met the man on that very day, I wasn't about to pour my feelings out and talk about them with him. He seemed like a genuinely kind person, but still, it didn't mean I would easily confide in him.

"The dwarves won't bother you tonight." He said and I felt my heart clench painfully. "Night has fallen and they will stay inside." He added before giving me another instruction "You shouldn't leave until I come back either."

I nodded and whispered my thanks again. I heard more than saw that Beorn was leaving again. He stopped at the door though and, without turning he cleared his throat and gruffly said.

"Some of them clearly don't agree with this."

And on those words, he left. I slowly brought a shaky hand to cover my eyes. My body was trembling. I took a shuddering breath and exhaled slowly, looking up at the ceiling in a desperate attempt to keep the tears at bay. I could feel my eyes burning. A huge lump was forming in my throat as my chest tightened. Inhaling deeply through my nose I exhaled through my mouth, repeating the process in a vain attempt to calm my nerves. It didn't work. Tears started to pool in my eyes as I kept my gaze stubbornly on the ceiling. I tried my best to contain the sobs, but the pain I felt was just too deep for me to ignore it.

I started to cry, my whole body shuddering as I ended up lying on the ground near the dogs. The puppies and dogs, visibly upset to see me like this, started to whine. The two dogs started to lick my hands and I hid my face in the fur of the closest one. I had no idea how long I cried. It felt as if I had never cried so much before. At that point dark thoughts crossed my mind, half convincing me that I couldn't ever feel so much pain as I currently did.

The candle was still burning when my tears finally stopped to fall.

I was panting slightly and my head was throbbing painfully.

Somehow I was now lying in the hay, curled on myself in a foetal position. The dogs were surrounding me; one even had his head on my hip while the puppies were sleeping between me and their mother. Eyes half opened, I stared blankly at the candle as exhaustion slowly made me black out completely.

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><p>I kept my eyes closed for a moment, even though I was now awake. Somehow I was hoping that everything had been a nightmare and that I would wake up to see the dwarves lying around me or preparing breakfast. With a heavy heart I stubbornly refused to acknowledge the fact that there were no snores around and that I was currently lying in the hay. All those details clearly indicated that I was really living through one of my worst nightmares. I was alone.<p>

This couldn't be happening.

Denial was a very strong feeling but right now, I couldn't fool myself any longer.

Opening my puffy eyes, I felt my heart sank deeper in my chest when I was met with the sight of the dogs. Nope. I really couldn't fool myself. There were no more beads in my hair. There was no one here, but me and the dogs.

Sniffing, I slowly sat back. I wasn't really hungry. I was still exhausted though and my head was still pounding. I was thirstier than ever but didn't really feel like drinking or eating anything. At the same time eating something could help me focus on something else than my current situation. Some of the dogs were observing me as I mechanically opened the jar to see that Beorn had given me honey. I ate a bit and drank some milk. I was functioning as a robot would. There was no real conscious thought behind my moves. I felt no hunger. I just ate because there was food and something in my mind told me I had to. Then I took the blankets, they were obviously old and, looking at the hair on it, I would guess that Beorn usually used it for his dogs, but I didn't care. I made myself a small nest in the hay near the dogs and I quickly hid under the blankets.

I was shivering slightly when one of the puppies made his way under the blanket and nestled against me. My lower lip was quivering a bit as I sniffled again and tears fell from my eyes again. Would they ever stop? I absentmindedly let the puppy lick my hand and scratched his belly a bit.

Eyes half closed I tried to calm down the raising panic in my heart.

I didn't feel numb.

I felt a pain like I never did before.

I remembered the shame and hurt I felt so long ago when I failed my exams. It was nothing, nothing at all, compared to how I felt now. It was my first experience of betrayal. I hated it. I couldn't understand what had occurred. Everything seemed like a blur. Were dwarves truly as cruel as the other races believed? Up until a few hours ago I would have said no. They had, after all, taken me in. They had made me one of their own. Or so I thought. It was a terrible truth to realize that it had all been in my head. That everything I had come to believe was wrong.

I hated myself. I hated that I was so naive.

So gullible.

The pain in my chest made me whimper pathetically.

I clenched my fists tightly. The pain from my cuts seemed to merge with the hollow pain from my heart. I felt lightheaded. I had to make a conscious effort in order to unclench my fists and, shakily, I breathed out.

Anger was just a way to hide from the sharp, tearing pain that was menacing to turn me insane. I rather suddenly decided to fuel my angry feelings in order to best push away that emotional pain that I couldn't deal with.

With my left hand I wiped away the tears on my cheeks and barely stopped myself from reaching for the absent beads in my hair. Biting my lower lip I placed my hand on my throat trying to control the whimper that threatened to leave my lips. I felt my fingers touch something cold and opened my eyes widely.

Suddenly I realized that I still had dwarvish beads on my person.

In half a second I knew that those ones I would keep. I wouldn't be able to throw them away. They had been given to me by Nori. He had braided the necklace for me. Somehow it now felt as if he had given me a true braid. I whimpered some more at the thought of my thief. Why had I done that to him? Did he think I didn't want him anymore? This thought seemed to tear me in two and I chocked. Coughing forced me to feel physical pain as my ribs were still not healed. Tears welled up in my eyes yet again. I loved him so much. Will he think I was rejecting him? I pressed the beads more tightly against my skin. At that moment I swore it to myself; I would never part from these beads. Never will I put them aside. I would wear them for as long as I lived.

My poor Nori. How must he feel right now?

I could remember clearly his face when Thorin had first given me the order to stay behind. He had looked completely shocked. He hadn't known. Some of them hadn't known. It should have lightened the weight on my heart, but it didn't. Right now I wasn't in the right state of mind to truly appreciate that. Whatever they might have tried wouldn't have worked anyway. They couldn't do anything to change this situation, especially now that I wasn't related to any of them anymore.

I was all alone, I suddenly realized. I was in a foreign world and had no one.

No one.

I was utterly alone.

My eyes were wide open but unseeing as I started to hyperventilate. What was I to do now? What could I do? What was my life going to look like? I had never been in such a situation. I had no idea how to deal with it, how to overcome this pain. Never in my entire life had I been entirely alone. This situation was entirely different from everything I had ever experienced.

At that very moment, hadn't it been for the dogs tickling me with their nose, I would have lost my grasp on reality right then.

Slowly I started to realize that this panic attack could have been quite dangerous for my mental health.

I mentally kicked myself.

If I started to despair, I would not be able to get through this. I had been through a lot already. I had survived fights. I had crossed the path of stone giants, goblins, trolls, orcs and wolves. I might not have been on my own then, but I had survived.

I had survived.

I wasn't completely lost anymore. I still had my daggers with me, and I could probably ask Beorn to help me get supplies. I wasn't as weak as I had once been. This was just yet another painful challenge that life threw at me.

Just another challenge...

I startled violently when the door opened rather suddenly. I couldn't help but wince as pain shot through my ribs and I cursed this weakness.

Trying my best to ignore it, I blinked and looked at the open door. I was honestly shocked to see Beorn standing there. Morning light streamed in behind him as the dogs happily welcomed him, wagging their tails and yipping.

"Is it morning already?" I blurted out stupidly, unsurprised to hear such a hoarse voice coming out of my throat.

Beorn didn't say a word but nodded. He looked at me pensively and it wasn't hard to guess what he saw. I could easily picture myself with tangled hair, covered in dirt and hay, and with my face red and puffy. That probably wasn't a nice sight. Sighing forlornly, I looked down and didn't say another word.

"The dwarves left at dawn."

I hadn't expected the sharp pain that shot through my chest. I should have. Their betrayal knew no limits. I grimaced and hid my eyes behind one of my shaky hands. Exhaling softly I did my best to control the torrent of despair that rushed through me. I didn't pay any attention to Beorn, and was entirely focused on myself. I jolted slightly when he spoke and I realized he had walked closer.

"One of them asked me to give you this." He gruffly said.

I heard Beorn place something on the stool I had used as a table. Swallowing thickly I dared finally uncover my eyes, but didn't quite feel courageous enough to look at that new item just yet. Instead I busied my hands and thoughts by playing with the puppies. I hadn't realized the whole night had passed with me wallowing in despair. I felt tired. I knew I had blacked out for a bit during the night, but it wasn't what I would call proper, refreshing sleep. Far from it actually... I felt exhausted and had no energy to really do anything. The pain from my injuries aside, I also felt sore all over, even though the hay should have been comfortable I felt as if I had tried to sleep on a rocky beach.

Even though I tried not to, it still hurt to think that the dwarves had left like that. Somehow, in a corner of my mind, I had still hoped they would change their mind. It hadn't really been a conscious thought, but it had still been there. What was I thinking? That Thorin would come and apologize? That Nori would sneak out and come to me? That Dori and Balin would change their minds? How stupid could I be?

It didn't matter anymore anyway.

They won. They had what they wanted. I wasn't with them anymore.

Tiredly, I looked at Beorn who was observing me.

"Why are you so kind with me?" I couldn't stop myself from asking softly.

He didn't reply though. Instead he grabbed the loaf of bread and took a chunk of it. He dipped it in the honey and ate quietly. He gestured for me to imitate him, but I honestly didn't think I could stomach anything right then. He didn't insist and I was grateful for that. Instead of repeating my question, I let him have breakfast in peace while I scratched one of the puppies behind the ears.

"They like you." Beorn pointed at the dogs.

"I used to have a dog, back at home." I muttered absentmindedly.

Silence stretched between us again but Beorn's presence somehow stopped me from wallowing in my painful thoughts. He still hadn't answered my question, but I didn't really care. At that moment, I more or less felt like I didn't care for anything anymore. A part of me knew that this reaction was particularly stupid seeing that I was in this situation because of my own stubbornness and childishness. But a bigger part of me was indeed quite stubborn and couldn't help but resent the dwarves for pushing me this far.

"What are you going to do?" Beorn suddenly asked and I was brought out of my thoughts.

I sighed. Resting my arms on my bent knees I looked up at him, before glancing away at the door. The sun seemed to be shining and today would probably be a good day. I remained silent for a moment, pondering on Beorn's question, trying to find an answer.

"I'm not sure." I replied in a strangled voice. "I could have followed them." I whispered, looking down. "I was able to."

I wasn't too sure whether those words were meant for Beorn or me. It was hard to express it, but in a way, the dwarves' betrayal hurt because it felt as if they had discarded all my efforts too. As if my training had meant nothing… as if I had been purposeless since the very beginning. Couldn't they see how hard I worked? Couldn't they admit I wasn't a lost little girl? Why betray me in such a way?

A few tears appeared at the corner of my eyes and I cursed myself for being so weak. Maybe they had been right then, maybe I was too weak to follow. No. No I wasn't weak!

I groaned and rubbed my forehead tiredly. Thanks to this I even doubted myself.

"What's keeping you?" Beorn said before taking another chunk of bread.

I looked at him, startled. Blinking several times I tried to make sense of his words. At first I was quite surprised by his question, but anger slowly started to make its appearance in my heart.

"They forbade me." I spat out finally. "You know it, you were there."

"But Thorin Oakenshield isn't your leader anymore." Beorn pointed out calmly. "He has no power on what you can or can't do." The giant man shrugged before licking his fingers where some honey had dripped.

"I…" I was left speechless.

I looked at him owlishly. For a second I felt as if I had just received a punch. I blinked several times as Beorn's words turned around and around in my head. Thorin had no power on me. He wasn't my leader anymore. In some ways this statement hurt me more than I could have imagined it ever would. But at the same time I realized that for the first time since I had signed those contracts years ago, I was entirely free of taking whatever decision I wanted. No one could choose for me. No one could tell me what to do. I could take a decision without answering to anyone.

Somehow this newfound freedom was both terrifying and thrilling.

Terrifying because it once more highlighted how alone I was. But at the same time it was so exhilarating to think I could finally make a decision freely, like any adult could.

Suddenly a chuckle passed the barrier of my mouth.

"Beorn you're amazing." I said with a smirk playing on my lips.

I didn't need to think for ages before taking a decision. I already knew what I wanted. Even though Beorn had been nice so far, I didn't really want to stay here and wait like a damsel for someone to come and pick me up. There was no doubt in my head that I wouldn't be able to face the dark misty mountains on my own either. There was just one path open to me, and it was going forward. I had to follow the dwarves' trail. I would go to Erebor and prove that I would have been able to continue on the quest.

"Do you know which direction I should follow to go to Erebor?" I quickly asked, a new fire slowly starting to light in me. This wasn't anger. No. It was determination. I had simply found an objective, a goal that I wanted to achieve. I wanted to prove I could do it. I wanted to prove myself.

"The path is dangerous. You could die." Beorn said matter-of-factly. "You'll have to cross Mirkwood on your own." He added. "It might not be possible."

I inhaled sharply. Staying silent for a few minutes I looked at Beorn. He didn't seem to care much about what I would decide. He was just stating fact. He obviously wasn't trying to influence me one way or the other and I respected that. A part of my brain whispered that the dwarves hadn't shown me the same kindness. They hadn't even thought about discussing with me, they had decided for me, without even allowing me to defend my point of view.

"What other choices do I have?" I asked a bit bitterly, trying to focus on something else than the dwarves at that moment.

"You could stay here." Beorn shrugged once more. "You could go back." He continued as he stood back up. "You could go elsewhere."

Even though I knew that I didn't want to do it, I still toyed with the idea of staying here. It would be easy to stay. The clearing was nice and peaceful. I could let my body heal slowly. I could live here for a while and not have to worry about orcs or anything. Beorn was relatively nice too and I knew he would protect me and be kind with me. I could tell the two of us would get along rather well. He was strong, I didn't doubt that, but he was a kind hearted man. Life with him wouldn't be thrilling, but it'd be safe. A whine and a tongue licking my fingers made me look down. I couldn't help but smile. The dogs were really friendly too. I wouldn't have to worry if I stayed.

But no matter how hard I tried, I couldn't really imagine myself living here.

I shook my head slowly and a bit sadly too. Apparently I wasn't able to choose the easiest and safest option. Had I always been like this? I couldn't remember at that moment.

I didn't need to say a word for Beorn to understand. He grunted but didn't seem angry or disappointed. He didn't seem surprised either. I looked up, craning my neck a bit as he really was a giant compared to me.

"I can't go back." I shook my head, a shiver running down my spine at the simple thought of crossing those damn mountains again.

I might not know what truly awaited me if I chose to go after the dwarves, but I knew perfectly well what was behind. I wasn't about to face that on my own. I wasn't brave enough.

"What other choice do I have?" I half whispered the question, looking back down.

"The Lonely Mountain isn't the only place still standing on the other side of Mirkwood." Beorn told me tilting his head a bit. "You could even choose to go south. There are men kingdoms and several towns or villages there."

I thought about it for a moment. This was a possibility I hadn't thought about. If I travelled south I could find towns and stay there. I could meet with men and be with my own kind. Oddly enough this didn't thrill me at all. It was quite the contrary actually and I couldn't help but grimace a bit. Men I had met so far weren't exactly the kind of people I wanted to deal with. Besides, I couldn't lie to myself. If I went south, it meant that I would have almost no way to ever see the dwarves again. Maybe Nori would come and look for me, I had to believe in him, I couldn't think he would abandon me, even after I threw away the beads. Did I want him to roam around this world, looking for me? Cold sweat ran down my back at the thought of Nori spending a lifetime looking for me and getting injured in the process. Hadn't it been what happened to his mother? And who said that he would be able to leave Erebor for long period of times? What if Thorin forbade him to go out or go far? Then I would spend a lifetime in a men's town without any chance to ever see him again.

I blinked several times to avoid tears from forming in my eyes.

There was no doubt in my mind that I couldn't choose that option.

"You said you were a healer." Beorn said then, forcing my attention back on him. "You could go to a human town and people would pay for your help. Laketown is coincidentally in the direction of the dwarves' kingdom. It's the only men's town between Mirkwood and the Lonely Mountain actually."

After having said that, Beorn just left me there. I took some time to think. Even though I knew perfectly well what I wanted, it didn't mean that I should do it. I knew I shouldn't take any rash decisions. It was both an easy and a hard choice to make though. It seemed I truly had no choice but to go forward, to follow in the dwarves' steps and journey to the east. Going back didn't make any sense. Firstly, I didn't want to go near those mountains any time soon. Secondly I didn't see the point on going back to the Blue Mountains now that I didn't have my beads anymore. I pushed away thoughts of Danà and Dís. Taking a deep breath I tried to remain rational. For several reasons, I honestly didn't feel like going to the elves either, and, even though Bilbo had invited me, I saw no point in going to the Shire when he wasn't there. No, my only two options were to go forward, go south or stay there.

Staying here felt counterproductive. After so many difficulties overcome, it would be a shame to hide here. No, I definitely had to move on. Maybe it was because of Nori, or maybe it was something else entirely that dictated my choice, but I somehow knew that I couldn't go south. It only left one way. I couldn't say whether or not I was being really honest with myself. Maybe I wasn't and maybe I had more options than I thought. At that moment though, I decided to try and cross Mirkwood on my own. If the dwarves didn't want me with them, then fine. I swallowed thickly as I thought that. I tried to remind myself how lost I had been when I first arrived in this world. Well, I just had to imagine than the same thing had happened for the second time, except this time I was better prepared. Exactly, I just had to mourn my life with the dwarves. It was the past. Nothing else. My future obviously seemed to be elsewhere, even though for now it obviously stirred me in the same direction as the dwarves.

I slowly stood up, wincing as muscles and joints protested painfully. Taking a few staggering steps I walked toward the stool where there was still bread, honey and milk. Right then I remembered that Beorn had brought me something that morning. Finally, I decided to have a look at this unexpected present.

It was a bead.

My heart started to pound as my fingers hovered over it. One of the dwarves had asked Beorn to give me a bead. A wooden bead with runes engraved on it. With a slightly shaky hand, I took it and traced the runes with my finger. I had to bit my lower lip as emotions violently rushed through me. I recognized those runes immediately and didn't need to think too much to guess who had made that bead. Nori had been working on it for a while during our journey. I remembered him cheekily hiding it from me and saying I would only see it once it was done. And though I wasn't sure what exactly those runes meant, I knew they were important. My instincts screamed at me that this bead was important too. It felt as if it were a promise, a promise from Nori… maybe once all of this was over he would really look for me. Maybe …

Fighting back tears that threatened to fall again, I removed my necklace and stringed the bead on it before putting it back on. It only strengthened my resolve to follow on the dwarves' path. If only for Nori, I had to go forward. I had to follow him and be as close to him as possible. And once this stupid quest was over and done with, I'd be able to meet with him again. I'll do it, if only for Nori.

Only for him.

With a renewed goal, I took a deep breath, ignoring the pain shooting from my ribs, and walked to the door. As I stepped out in the warm sunlight, I blinked a bit and then looked around. Beorn was nowhere to be seen, so I went to the main house, hoping to find him there. I wasn't disappointed.

He was sitting on one of the huge chairs near the hearth. I could see that he was working on something but I wasn't sure what he was doing. From where I stood it looked like he was stitching something. It honestly was a bit odd to see such a huge man working on something so precise with what seemed like a tiny needle in his big hand.

"Did you make a decision?" He asked me, not looking up from his work.

I had that feeling that he knew perfectly well what decision I had taken. I stepped further in and went to stand closer to him.

"I'll go to Laketown." I said after a short moment. "You said they might need a healer there." I added and tilted my head; at least it meant I might not have to rely on charity to survive. If I could really work as a healer, I would probably be able to earn some money.

He nodded and glanced at me before continuing on his work.

"You'll need supplies for your journey there." He calmly stated, pointing out the obvious distractedly.

He didn't pause in his work. His movements were precise, showing that he was used to do this. I could only guess that when you lived alone, you became proficient in a lot of different tasks. I swallowed thickly, thinking that this would probably be my future too. I would have to live alone, eat alone, do everything alone.

Pushing all those thoughts away, I looked at Beorn and focused on my current situation. I would have time to think about the future when it came to pass.

"Would you mind helping me again?" I asked softly. "I have no idea how I could repay your kindness though." I said calmly, smiling apologetically at him.

He shrugged.

"My bees produce lots of honey. I have more plants than I need. It's no bother." He tilted his head as a smirk surprisingly grew on his face. "And if it can prove those stubborn dwarves wrong, then it is sufficient for me."

I couldn't help but laugh, even though it was a bit bitter and painful, at his words.

"I don't know if that will happen, but I promise I'll try my best." And I wasn't lying. I genuinely wanted to show those damn dwarves how wrong they were.

Beorn nodded and stood up, putting his work on the chair as he did so.

"You should wait until tomorrow. It's too late now." He said gruffly.

I nodded absentmindedly. He probably was right too. At any rate, there was no need for me to rush. Right now, I didn't want to end up meeting the dwarves on the way. I could only guess that if it happened, it wouldn't end well. We would probably end up yelling at each other and I really didn't want them to think I was sneaking up on them to stay with them. No. Their betrayal hurt me too much. It was true that I was going in the same direction as them, but it was mostly because I didn't feel like I had any other choice. Besides, I didn't want to be too far from Nori.

Right now I couldn't care less about the others. Well, that wasn't entirely true either. I knew some of them had nothing to do with what happened, but they had still left without even trying to come and see me. They had left without a word. It was hurtful too. After all that had happened in the past two years it was painfully easy for them to turn their back on me. It was crushingly easy for them to leave me behind. In a way I hated them for that.

At least Nori had left me something.

His bead was a promise. It was a promise between us. Even though there was no way for me to be sure, I knew I wasn't mistaken when I thought this way.

I spent the rest of my day with Beorn. He wasn't a talkative person, so most of the day we spent in companionable silence. The dogs were trailing us as I followed Beorn and helped as much as he let me. Clearly the giant man didn't want me to injure myself further. He allowed me to use several plants he had dried to make ointments that I mechanically put into small pots and pouches. Focusing on something, mostly menial tasks, was good for me. It allowed me to empty my head a bit and for a moment I was able to breathe more easily. While I busied myself with crushing plants into powder, I didn't need to think about the dwarves, the quest, my future, or anything else really. I could simply focus on the simple and well-known movements. I did my best to refill my healing supplies and Beorn kindly helped, even going so far as to provide me with some clean bandages.

"Why do you need to gather so many plants?" I couldn't help but blurt out at some point before blushing furiously. It wasn't really kind of me to remind the man that he was living here alone.

"Those plants can be used on animals too." He simply replied, seemingly unbothered by my bluntness.

"What was it you gave me yesterday?" I added after a few minutes.

"Fennel."

He wasn't one for long sentences. I had barely spent a day in his company, and I already knew that. When he saw that I was looking at him curiously though, he elaborated his answer.

"Fennel is a good relaxant when used in a bath." He explained and I nodded.

After a short moment of silence, he pointed me to another plant and started to explain how to use it and what it could do. We spent a few hours this way, discussing herbal remedies and plants' properties. It was extremely soothing.

Clearly, Beorn was observant enough to realize that talking about this was allowing me to be in a calmer state of mind. I could only be grateful for his help, even though it also made me dread my impending loneliness even more. The following day, and for days and weeks after that, I wouldn't have anyone at my side to help me get rid of these depressing thoughts. Quite on the contrary, I would be alone with those thoughts.

Beorn didn't allow me to wallow in my sorrow though.

After working on refilling my healing supplies, he showed me how to cook some highly nutritive bars made almost exclusively of honey, oats and nuts. He also allowed me to follow him as we fed the horses and cows with grains. Beorn then spent quite some time brushing the horses while he more or less ordered me to stay put out of his way. This turned out in an improvised nap in the hay. When I woke up, it was to realize that the dogs had found me again.

All in all I spent the day in a peaceful bubble. Thoughts of the dwarves didn't plague me that much as, every time I allowed myself to think about them, Beorn wasn't far and was extremely efficient at distracting me from my painful thoughts.

That evening, he didn't bring me to the small house. Instead of being left alone there, we shared a meal in his house. As the night fell he helped me make a small bunk with hay in the main house, near the hearth. The dogs and the puppies had followed us in and as soon as the fresh hay was placed, the puppies jumped on the bunk and started to settle in.

"Well..." I couldn't help but smile a bit. "I guess I won't be alone tonight either."

Beorn grunted but didn't reply. I made myself comfortable, scratching the dogs and puppies and blocking away depressing thoughts. I felt as if Beorn was observing me, but when I glanced in his direction, he was not looking in my direction. He removed his coat and went to the door. Before he closed it behind him, he turned once more in my direction.

"Whatever sounds you hear during the night, don't go out." He instructed before shutting the door, leaving me alone with the dogs.

I thought for a moment that I wouldn't be able to find sleep tonight either, but it seemed I was wrong. Exhaustion or maybe it was the peaceful feeling of this place, allowed me to fall asleep in a minute.

In the morning, it was Beorn who woke me up when he came back in. As he left the door open, the dogs rushed outside and I saw that the sky was slowly turning into lighter shades of blue. The sun was about to rise.

We didn't speak much as I prepared my bag, filling it with as much food as I could. Beorn insisted that I took gourds filled with fresh water too and I easily followed his instructions. It would have been stupid not to.

Barely a couple of hours had passed when we both stepped out of his house. I was surprised to see one of his horses with a saddle on.

"I will come with you." Beorn finally said. "We will take you to the old path."

I had expected to walk this morning already with simple instruction about which direction to follow. I wasn't about to complain about this unexpected help, but still, it didn't feel right to force Beorn to travel away from his home.

"It won't take us much time." Beorn calmly added, caressing the horse's mane. "We'll be back here by nightfall."

Beorn helped me up and, once I was comfortably seating in the saddle, there was an odd silence. Soon though, we were on our way. We travelled without stopping and didn't speak much. Beorn would, from time to time, point me a flower or a plant and tell me about its healing properties, but all in all we made our way toward Mirkwood without discussing much.

He escorted me to the entrance of the forest. One of the dogs had trailed along too. Once I saw what the forest looked like, I had to admit that I felt a bit scared and uncertain. Even the dog didn't appear to go too close to the immense and dark trees. I wasn't so sure I wanted to go that way anymore, but according to Beorn there was no other path through the woods and trying to bypass it would take weeks if not months of travel. I wasn't about to do that.

I stepped down from the horse and silently, Beorn helped me gather my belongings. I stood in front of the giant man for a moment, unsure of what to say.

"Stay safe." He grunted out suddenly and I smiled.

"I hope we'll see each other again Beorn." I told him warmly. "I can't tell you how grateful I am for your help."

He shrugged and then slowly, almost hesitatingly, he placed one of his huge hands on my head and ruffled my hair a bit.

Then without a word he turned away, the dog and horse following him.

It felt awkward to leave just like that. Beorn had done a lot for me. He had helped me tremendously the day before. He had given me some reprieve from my troubled thoughts. I looked at him for a moment, watching as he made his way back to his clearing. It wasn't too late to call him and go back there with him. But as I thought of this, I knew I just couldn't. I had already chosen to go through the forest. I took a deep breath, wincing a bit at the pain that still echoed in my ribs, and turned my back to Beorn and faced the forest.

As I took a few steps in the darkness of Mirkwood I could only hope that this time, my lonely journey wouldn't end up in disaster. I knew very well I didn't have a very good history.

* * *

><p>As I started to feel seriously too tired to keep on walking, I decided to stop for at least a short break. The good point of being in this dark forest was that I didn't need to bother and find a place to camp. Beorn's warnings were still ringing in my head. 'Don't eat or drink anything coming from the forest.' 'Don't stray from the path.' And he had particularly insisted on ' Don't even touch the dark water.'<p>

I wasn't sure what this dark water was, but I doubted I would want to touch it anyway. Right now, I only had to concentrate about staying on the path. This was why, when I was tired, I didn't bother look around for a comfortable place to stop, I just stopped where I was. I couldn't leave the path. Well, I could, but I didn't want to. I was pretty sure that Beorn's warning hadn't been meaningless.

I looked around and grimaced. There wasn't much to see. The trees were tall and almost completely blocked daylight. I couldn't actually be sure of the time of day. During my first day of travel in here I had gathered the pieces of dry wood that had fallen on the path and used it as makeshift torches. My fire lighting skills were far from being good, but after several tries, I had managed to get a flame going. I was grateful for it too. The darkness in this damned forest was oppressive. From my spot on the path I could only see a small flicker of light, and then the menacing shadows of the trees encased me.

Slowly I put the torch on the ground, careful of not letting it die. It had happened several times already and the sudden darkness hadn't been welcomed. Once I was certain the torch wasn't about to be snuffed out, I sat as comfortably as I could on the stones.

I sighed as I rummaged through my new bag, a very nice gift that Beorn had insisted I took. It was filled mostly with food and water when I started my lonely journey, but my supplies had already diminished quite a bit. I had rolled a warm blanket on top of it, but other than that, I only had gourds of water and food supplies in the bag. My satchel was once again securely strapped to me, it had proven to be a good idea after all. The snacks made mostly of oats, nuts and honey that Beorn and I had prepared were very nutritious. It was filling, even though I had trouble biting into it and most of all, it was still good even though I had left quite some time ago.

I had no maps to guide me, but there was just one path to follow and as long as I didn't stray from it, I shouldn't get lost. It was somehow reassuring in a way. Though I'd have to admit that a scared part of myself had to point out that it meant I couldn't hide or run anywhere if danger arose.

I let my gaze trail over the flat rocks that paved the path. Dirt, leaves and even some dead tree branches covered it. I absentmindedly played with a dry stick while I took a break.

It had been a week now. Or so I could only guess. The trees were too dense for me to keep an accurate count of the passing time. For all I knew, I might as well have been walking during the night and slept during the day. Maybe I slept too much, too often. Or maybe on the contrary I didn't sleep enough. I had no way to prove it. But I honestly didn't care much. I walked all day long at a regular pace, stopping only for small breaks during which I would ration food and water as much as possible. I didn't want to end up starving in there. I tried my best not to eat or drink often. I was pushing myself as much as I could. Thankfully it managed to distract me from other thoughts often enough. When my mind was busy pushing away thoughts of hunger and thirst, it wasn't busy thinking about the dwarves or the darkness that surrounded me.

This forest made me uneasy. I could feel eyes following my steps, as if they were waiting for me to step out of the path. It was unsettling to say the least. Sometimes, I could swear I was being followed, but whenever I stopped and held my breath, trying to hear anything that would prove me right, I would just stand there stupidly for nothing. Sometimes I would think I saw something move in the darkness, but whatever light my small torch provided wasn't enough to see past the border of the path. At some point I could have sworn I saw the light of the flame reflected in eyes too.

It freaked me out so much that I let the torch fall to the ground, snuffing the flame and ending up in complete darkness.

It had taken me Mahal knew how long to calm down enough to light the fire again.

After that I had been extra careful with my torch, clutching it as if it were my lifeline.

I wasn't stupid or superstitious. Yet I felt something was wrong with this place. The forest was playing some sort of tricks on my mind. I was sure of it.

Or maybe it was the loneliness.

And I was lonely. So very lonely…

It wasn't the same as when I had been looking for the dwarves either. This time, I wasn't hoping to see anyone in particular at the end of my journey. It would be a man's town, if I was lucky, or a lonely death.

When I wasn't thinking of my hunger and thirst, my thoughts were quite depressing. The pain that I had felt back Beorn's place hadn't disappeared from my chest. It was still as fresh as it had been back then. It probably had to do with me stubbornly avoiding to think about it all. Thankfully, I had managed to find something that helped. Oddly enough, thoughts of Nori managed to cheer me up a bit, though they were bittersweet. In a way, even though I had broken my link to the dwarves, I hadn't done so with Nori. I could only hope he knew it too. He couldn't ignore that I hadn't thrown away his beads and he had given me another one. This situation was nothing but a difficult moment to pass. I had to go through this, and once it was all over, I'd finally be with Nori. I could almost convince myself that this was certain.

What did my dear uncle use to say so many years ago? Didn't he say that life was nothing but a succession of challenges? That the way you faced them was what defined you? I could still remember him saying such things even though I was but a child. This might not have been what was expected of him when I first arrived at his home, but it was amongst the first discussions we had.

It was odd how I remembered it so perfectly so many years later.

I lied down a bit on the stone path and used my bag as a cushion. It wasn't really comfortable, but it wasn't that bad. I allowed myself some time to rest a bit, even if I didn't sleep much, I could still let my feet and legs take a break. I shivered a bit, feeling quite cold, but tried to ignore it.

As I was completely alone for the first time since I arrived here, I couldn't help but remember another time when I thought I had been abandoned. The situations were entirely different of course. I was a child when my parents died and left me seemingly alone in my previous world. But it hadn't been the same. I hadn't been alone and they hadn't chosen to leave me, to abandon me. I could never believe they did. I could easily remember my uncle telling me kindly that this shouldn't define me. He had this kind of way about him, he wasn't an academic, but in my head and heart I always saw the wisdom in his words. It didn't matter that some of the things he said weren't the kind of words I wanted to hear. He wasn't wrong, and that was what had always mattered.

A week after I arrived in their home he sat next to me as I was crying on my bed. He had been so kind at that time. I remembered some of the words he had whispered then. It was that very day that he told me life was harsh and unfair for the first time. It might not have been what a child wanted or needed to hear, but it had somehow helped me. And then he had explained that I would have to face many challenges and that my actions would define who I was.

Well. I had faced loss several times now. I had mourned my parents when I was a kid. For Mahal's sake, I even mourned for a whole world, a whole life, before. I had survived through both those losses. I had suffered failures too, just like anyone did in life. What was happening now was just another challenge, another pain to fight and overcome.

I did it before. I could do it again.

I could go through this. Yes, I definitely could.

An insidious voice though whispered in my head that this time was different. When my parents had died, my aunt and uncle had been there for me. They had helped me to get through the pain of the loss. They had helped me understand. As for mourning my previous world and life, well, it didn't take a genius to admit that it would have been harder without the dwarves. Had it not been for them I probably wouldn't have survived through my first week on this world, let alone two years. Without them here to provide me with another family, with friends and, as cheesy as it sounded, with love, I would have probably tried to go back to my previous world. I didn't need to have magic to know how this would have ended; I would have died alone in the woods somewhere, just like the other man had.

The dwarves had become my family. They had helped me through the loss exactly in the same way that my uncle and aunt had. This time I was on my own. Maybe this loneliness was the reason why it hurt so much now. Or maybe that tearing pain was due to the fact that, for the first time, those I mourned had chosen to leave me behind. My parents hadn't chosen, I couldn't believe they did. My uncle and aunt hadn't chosen either. No one even knew why I had ended up in this world. It hadn't been a choice though. But the dwarves...

I frowned. The dwarves had chosen. I had to find a way to get past this betrayal. I didn't have a choice. Taking a deep, shaky breath first, I rubbed my face, ignoring the remnants of pain in my hands. The cuts had healed quite well so far, but the flesh wasn't completely healed yet. If I could live through so many hardships, I could survive on my own too. I could live through the pain and the loneliness. I could live through the challenges. I could face anything life threw at me. Wasn't I the only person so far that had survived so long after travelling to another world? There might be others, but no one seemed to know of them.

Fueled by anger and a deep desire to prove them all wrong, I felt suddenly a bit more energetic. If I managed to survive through this, if I could live alone, then that would prove to them all they had been wrong. Yes, they were wrong to consider me weak. They were wrong to think I was useless. They were wrong and I would prove it. They would be the ones to come back to me. They would, because I wouldn't ask them to take me back in.

Apparently, my stay in the dwarvish halls had influenced me in more ways than I thought, though I had always been a bit stubborn. This was a whole new level of stubbornness; I was honest enough with myself to admit it. Still, filled with some sort of goal, I felt appeased.

I closed my eyes and drifted off into a state of semi-awareness. I knew I wasn't asleep but this was the only kind of rest I managed to get in this damned, creepy forest. I wasn't comfortable to sleep a lot, the darkness of these woods was too unsettling. So I walked and barely stopped at all usually.

As soon as the soreness in my legs and feet diminished, I slowly stood back up, gathered my few belongings and left.

Days probably passed but I couldn't be sure of anything.

At some point though, the stiffness and silence around shifted. It had been maybe ten days or more now since I left Beorn at the edge of Mirkwood and this was the first real sound I heard. I had heard, or thought I heard, animals shifting the dead leaves in the darkness, but all those sounds had been somehow muffled. It was part of what annoyed me the most in this forest. It felt as if everything was dead and even sounds didn't travel far. I was trying my best to be quiet, so maybe I was more prone to notice the unnatural absence of noise. Hearing something right then was somewhat of a relief. I recognized it easily. It was running water.

My relief was short lived though. I frowned, remembering Beorn's warning about a river of dark waters. Could it be this river? As the sound grew louder, I finally came up to a riverbank. The river was wide and I couldn't see the other side. There was a sort of dense mist that stagnated just above the rushing water that was indeed dark. I hadn't doubted Beorn, but I had somehow hoped that I would have a way to cross that river. Even without his warning, I honestly didn't want to go near it. Looking around I couldn't see any bridge. There was no apparent way for me to cross unless I wanted to swim and that wasn't going to happen.

I frowned.

What was I to do?

I couldn't cross. I couldn't swim. I couldn't leave the path.

I was stuck.

I swore, welcoming the sound of my own voice, though it was a sad fact to realize it. Annoyed I let my bag fall to the ground, a metre away from the water, and I sat there, in the middle of the path.

What should I do?

It wasn't as if I had an axe and the strength to cut a tree to create a makeshift bridge. I had no rope to use, and no skill to wield it in an appropriate way to cross that river anyway.

The area around the river was understandably damp and cool. Standing there I shivered more than once. Glancing down I was startled to see some footprints in the mud. Clearly the dwarves had found a way to cross. Somehow it annoyed me a little to know that they had managed to cross and I so obviously couldn't.

Taking a few steps back I hugged myself, trying to bring back some warmth in my limbs by bouncing up and down.

It took me a good couple of hours to come to a decision. A painful headache was starting to bother me quite a lot and concentrating on anything was becoming difficult. I felt more than knew, that I had to take a decision soon. I didn't have much choice once again. It was either going back the same way or braving one of Beorn's warnings. He had said that I shouldn't leave the path, and that I shouldn't touch the water, much less drink it. I didn't want to go back and retrace my steps towards Beorn's place. More than slightly worried, I chose to follow the river. It would obviously lead me somewhere, and hopefully this somewhere wouldn't be my death.

With a shock, I suddenly realized that thinking about my death didn't scare me as much as it should. I shook my head, angry at myself. I shouldn't let the dwarves' betrayal get to me that much. Their behaviour was no reason for me to be depressed to this point. I felt a bit dizzy as I stood back up and it took me a moment to shake away this odd feeling. I had successfully pushed thoughts of the dwarves away; I just had to do it a bit more. Right now I needed to be aware of my surroundings. I stilled as I arrived at the edge of the path. I couldn't help but look at the path. Strengthening my will, I glared at the path and then the riverbank and took a step off of the path. I froze immediately. I was waiting for something to happen. Beorn had been so adamant, it had to mean something. But nothing happened as I took a second step.

Bracing myself, I grabbed one of my daggers and unsheathed it, the familiar weight reassuring me a little. I reaffirmed my grip on my torch, which seemed to be a lifeline more than ever. Taking a deep breath I started to walk again.

I was honestly relieved that nothing happened so far.

I was walking mindlessly. It was easier to follow the riverbank than it had been following the path. I didn't have to brush away leaves to make sure I was still on the stone path. I just had to walk, keeping the river at my right. My thoughts were wandering without me being conscious of much. Still, that headache seemed quite persistent. I wasn't prone to headaches, but maybe the pain and worry I felt were just too much.

Time passed. I walked. I almost never stopped. My head was now throbbing painfully. The pain kept growing but I ignored it. I walked. I kept walking. It was as though I couldn't think of anything else anymore. My eyes were stuck to the ground in front of my feet. My sight seemed to throb with the pain in my head. I felt dizzy and slightly nauseous too.

Then at some point I staggered and my knees finally buckled under my weight.

I crashed with a pained grunt on the ground.

I didn't even have the strength to try and stand back up.

My cheek was pressed against the cold ground. My sight wavered as I looked at my torch which had fallen from my hand. For a short moment I seemed hypnotized by the flame as it slowly died out.

Darkness encompassed me.

As I slowly closed my unseeing eyes, only one thought crossed my mind. Maybe I shouldn't have left the path after all.

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><p><strong>AN: Hi everyone, first thanks for your patience. I hadn't planned to take so long in updating this chapter but real life got in the way. I thought I'd be able to update at least last week, but unexpected problems appeared. Secondly thanks to all the amazing reviews. I know I surprised you all with the last chapter and that made me incredibly happy :) If you knew everything that's going to happen it wouldn't be funny at all. **

**Anyway, this is actually the first half of what was originally chapter 54 but Eylanan convinced me (rather easily) to rewrite the chapter and cut it in two. I'm quite happy with this first half (considering what it originally was...it definitely was worth the wait). **

**Health issues are currently bugging me and I can't write as much as I'd want to. I apologize for the long wait between chapters. As a reader I can understand how annoying it is to wait so long for a chapter to be updated. As an author though I just can't bring myself to update every week a short and/or poorly written chapter. I can only hope you understand. What I'll try to do though is keep regular updates on my profile as to where I am currently in the writing process of the chapter. Do know that I don't just write and post chapters. I write, then re read and re write then send it to my awesome beta (Eylanan) and often re write before finally giving it a final edit...and all the while I try to continue writing. It takes time and I don't like to be rushed. **

**Today I'm posting this chapter without this last final edit. I just corrected what Eylanan pointed out. As I said...health issues are annoying me right now. **

**Please be patient. **

**Other than that I hope you liked this chapter, I have to rewrite more or less completely the other part of the chapter so it might take some time but the good news is that some of it (a good half) is already written. **


	55. Mirkwood

**everything belongs to JRRTolkien**

**Thanks to Eylanan for beta-ing **

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><p>I moaned.<p>

Awareness came back slowly. My eyes were still closed and I wasn't really awake yet, but somehow I knew I was about to wake. My head was pounding. It felt as if an army of dwarves was currently hammering my skull from the inside. I winced as I coughed loudly. Pain jolted in my chest and echoed in my head. I rolled on my side, realizing in a corner of my mind that I wasn't on the forest's ground. I was sleeping on something hard and not really comfortable. It took me several minutes to catch my breath. Slowly, I opened my eyes and blinked several times. The light was soft enough not to cause me additional pain. In a second I realized I was now indoors.

Suddenly I sat, eyes wide, heart beating wildly.

The sudden movement made me dizzy and was painful but I fought against that feeling. I could see I was in a small room. There was no window and the light came from a few candles that were alight on a long chest of drawers. Aside from that, there was nothing else in this room but the bed I was currently on. There wasn't even a pillow or a sheet on it. It was rather uncomfortable too, but it was still probably better than the forest's ground. What bothered me more was that my bag was nowhere to be seen. With a quick check, I found out that I didn't have my daggers anymore either. The knife hidden in my boot was gone too. My satchel was still strapped to my back though, and after a quick check I knew that my smallest blade was still hidden under my leather bracelet.

My gaze swept around. There was truly nothing here to indicate where I was.

I couldn't remember anything after I blacked out in the forest. I had no memories of being found, much less moved. It was unsettling. Clearly I had been taken away to some place and left in this room alone and unarmed. The fact that my weapons and bag had been taken wasn't really comforting. It probably meant that whomever took me, thought of me as a potential threat.

Slowly, my unease increased.

I was scared.

I had no idea where I was. I didn't know who had brought me here. I couldn't know if they were friends or foes.

For a moment I was completely frozen on the spot. What should I do? Staying right where I was didn't seem to be a very good idea. Should I try to wait for whoever took me to come? Should I try to escape? Was there a need to escape anything? Considering how lucky I had been so far, I didn't really think this was a good idea to just wait. But on the other hand I couldn't really run away without my bag and weapons. Maybe the person who took me would actually be kind enough to help me? Why would anyone who meant me harm bring me back to his place? It didn't make sense. If this person wanted to kill me, then he would have left me in the woods. Probably...

Steeling my resolve, I slowly stood up. My legs were a bit wobbly but I managed to walk to the tall wooden door.

For a brief moment I wondered whether it would open as I turned the knob. I held my breath, hoping I wouldn't be actually imprisoned in here. Somewhat surprisingly, the knob turned easily. I let out a relieved breath and blinked several times when I saw the open door and the corridor. So I wasn't a prisoner. That was good to know.

I stood there for a moment, unsure of what to do. I softly closed the door again and let my back press against the wall.

I needed to think.

What was the last thing I remembered? I was in the forest and I was stuck on one side of a river. I had no choice but to leave the path. After that…well, after that I wasn't sure what had happened. Was this the men's town, Laketown? Had I managed to get there, forgetting half of my journey? It didn't make sense. Besides, the idea I could forget half of my trip was quite terrifying. I was left hoping I was anywhere but in Laketown.

It didn't make much sense either that I would be stuck in a room that wasn't closed. Unless those people didn't see me as a threat, but then why would they take my daggers?

I groaned and annoyingly passed my hands in my hair. I ignored the pain in my palms, ignored the stab in my heart at the feel of my lack of braids, and focused on my current situation. Nothing made sense to me right now. I had a ton of questions whirling in my head, and no way to answer them.

The one thing I knew for sure was that I wouldn't get any answer if I stayed there.

Inhaling deeply, I tried to gather whatever courage was in me. Slowly and uncertainly, I opened the door again and peered outside, at one end of the long corridor. No one was in sight.

"Hello?" I called, though I was trying my best not to be loud. It was stupid, I knew that, but I couldn't bring myself to speak loudly.

I was just feeling too uncomfortable.

When I looked on the other side, I jolted violently and let out a curse. My heart hammered against my ribcage and I tried my best to calm it after the fright I just gave myself. On the other side of the corridor, almost immobile, were two sentries. They were looking at me in silence for a short moment before they decided to come closer.

They were tall and thin. I quickly noted that they were wearing some sort of light armour, as well as weapons. It made me tense a bit. Were they here, in this corridor, to keep me under watch? As they walked, I didn't move, and finally realized they were elves. I blinked and gaped at them. They were as stunning as the others had been; though this time they really didn't look friendly at all. I swallowed thickly as the two men stopped in front of me and observed me in silence for a short moment.

I had no idea what to do or say.

Their stares were making me really uncomfortable and their silence wasn't friendly. There was no smile or kind look on their faces. They looked like emotionless statues. Slowly fear started to grow in my chest.

"Now that you are awake," One of them finally said in an even tone, "Lord Thranduil will want to see you."

I looked at him and nodded, feeling suddenly shy and inadequate on top of my current nervousness. I really didn't like how elves made me feel. Right now, I still had no idea whether they were to be considered as allies or enemies. As the silence grew, I realized they were waiting for me to react in some ways. Clearing my throat, I forced myself to speak.

"I'm sorry for my lack of knowledge," I said in the most polite tone I could, there was no need to antagonize them by being impolite and rude. "But I don't know who Lord Thranduil is."

My heart was pounding in my ribcage and I honestly was anxious. These elves didn't even try to appear nice. They were nothing like those of Rivendell. At least, back in Rivendell, most of the elves had tried to appear friendly. They had been very patient with the dwarves too, which in itself prove how kind they could be. The two guards in front of me were not displaying the same sort of character. If anything they looked haughty.

They didn't reply to my question and simply gestured for me to follow them. Not seeing the point in protesting or complaining, I obeyed immediately. So far I didn't really appreciate them much. It only made me more nervous to see how they behaved. Lindir had been so different, so gallant and friendly. Those two elves seemed bothered by the fact that I existed. I was walking between the two of them, feeling like a child as I was so much shorter than them. It really didn't help assuage my anxiety.

For what seemed like an eternity but probably was barely a minute, they didn't speak.

Then rather suddenly, the one walking at my right looked down at me.

"Lord Thranduil is the King of Mirkwood." He said, sneering at me.

I did my best to ignore the sneer, though it didn't really bode well for me. If the simple soldiers treated me this way, I couldn't imagine their king to be any better. Slowly but surely, I felt my anxiety rise. I was worried. I was currently forced to follow the elves quick strides even though I had been unconscious barely ten minutes ago. They obviously didn't care much for my health. I would say that was rude and unfriendly. It was just another hint for me to guess how I was perceived.

They were hostile.

As we left that first corridor though, I had no more time to think about those words or their behaviour. My eyes widened and I staggered slightly. I stared in front of me, mouth agape, in complete awe.

The sight was…breathtaking.

Thorin's Halls were amazingly crafted and had a wondrous architecture. Rivendell was peaceful, beautiful, and its natural beauty was equal to its architectural one. Mirkwood was…I was truly speechless for a moment. It seemed impossible to distinguish were nature started and crafted building ended. Giant roots and light paths crisscrossed. Candles were alit everywhere, creating a surprising picture made of shadows. I could see elves walking peacefully on branches, or maybe those paths were high footbridges, as if they weren't walking so high that they would break their necks if they fell. I could also hear water running and, as I looked around, I saw several waterfalls and ponds.

"Lord Thranduil is waiting." One of the elves snapped as he pushed my shoulder.

I winced at the pain coming from my chest but started to walk again. I didn't dare comment that Thranduil couldn't really have been waiting, as I had been unconscious so far. It wasn't as if he knew already that I was awake and walking. I restrained myself from saying anything though, there was no point in antagonizing those two guards more than they already were. I struggled for a moment to detach my eyes from the magnificent sight. Looking at my feet, I silently trailed behind the guards until the same elf grabbed my shoulder and forced me to a stop. Startled I looked up to realize that I was now standing at the bottom of an impressive throne. My eyes widened before I hastily looked back at my feet, blushing. I was out of my depth here.

Never before had I seen a throne. Thorin might be king, but he never actually behaved like one, or rather, he never sat on a massive throne. Right then, I could safely say that I had never felt as inadequate and insignificant as I was feeling now.

There was a very strange atmosphere in this place. I clenched my feet on my tunic and swallowed thickly. The elves around were silent, but I could feel their eyes on me. I was struggling to prevent myself from fidgeting. Stories that the dwarves had told me suddenly popped in my head and I realized that in those, the elves hadn't played a friendly part. Actually, I could recall very well that the dwarves' bad behaviour in Rivendell was due to their bad relationship with the elves living near Erebor. I didn't need to be a genius to guess that the elves living near Erebor were those of Mirkwood. Now at least I knew they weren't simply unfriendly towards me, though that was poor consolation. I had this ominous feeling that did nothing to calm my nerves.

Suddenly, my association with the dwarves didn't seem to be something I should talk about. Actually, I felt the urge to not even name them if I could.

"Who are you?" A cold, unfeeling voice asked, startling me out of my thoughts.

He hadn't spoken loudly, but in here his voice carried easily. It was the voice of someone who had power and knew it. I shivered.

Slowly, I looked up and saw a man that was both the most beautiful, and the scariest I had ever seen. He had long hair so lightly coloured that the candlelight made them shimmer. On his head I could see a crone that seemed to be made of some sort of wood and berries, but it couldn't be. It had to be some sort of other material. I didn't ponder on it though, as his cold, piercing gaze stared at me.

"My name is Amelia, my Lord." I said, bowing my head lowly, even going so far as to bend at the waist. My heart was pounding and I feared he could hear it. I remained in this position for a moment before slowly straightening my back. Taking a slow inhale, I looked back up at him, though I didn't dare stare at him in the eyes.

He remained silent as his eyes narrowed. His presence was overbearing. He didn't need to talk or move for me to know deeply that he was powerful. No one could have mistaken him for a human. Silently he tilted his head and leant back on his throne. For a moment he observed me, his fingers lightly taping against his armrest. Each soft tap seemed to echo in my head as I struggled to keep my calm. I needed to be calm enough to focus on this discussion.

"What are you doing in my realm?" He finally asked.

I had never heard a voice so emotionless before. It felt as though each word he pronounced was a threat. At the same time, it also made me feel even more insignificant. How could he manage this? By using simple words he still was able to convey how unimportant I was compared to him. It was creepy.

Clearing my throat lightly, I chose my words carefully.

"I apologize for entering your realm unauthorized my Lord. I didn't know I had." I said at first, thinking it was appropriate. "I was on my way to Laketown, but couldn't cross the black river." I chose not to elaborate too much. Right now I was sure that the less I said, the better it would be for my health.

He frowned at that and placed a finger on his lips. He was looking at me in a very odd way; it suddenly seemed as though I was both completely insignificant and yet intriguing. My anxiety immediately reached new heights. I knew instinctively that I didn't want king Thranduil to be intrigued by me. I'd rather be insignificant.

"Why are you going there?" His tone hadn't changed yet, but his eyes seemed to be evaluating me now.

"I'm a healer my Lord." I softly replied. "I thought I could be of use there." I didn't dare look him in the eyes; instead I focused my gaze on a spot near his feet.

Suddenly he stood and came down the steps of his high throne. With a simple flick of his wrist, he ordered the guards away and then started to turn around me. I felt like a prey. My instincts were screaming at me, ordering me to make a run for it. I would have liked to say that nothing would happen, but right then I honestly wasn't sure. Still, I tried my best to crush down my fears. Unable to stop myself completely though, I started to fidget a bit.

"A healer." Lord Thranduil said quietly before pausing for another long moment. I felt his finger under my chin as he forced me to look him in the eye. "Why would a little girl travel there on her own? Where do you come from?"

Clearly, it wasn't usual for a woman my age to travel alone, but I already knew that. I wasn't sure what things I should say. It probably was better to speak the truth, though forgetting some details wasn't really lying. Bracing myself, I looked up and directly at the King.

"I have no one to travel with my Lord. And I come from the west, behind the mountains." His eyes narrowed at me, but before he could ask another question, a thought struck me and I added calmly. "I didn't want to abuse Lord Elrond's hospitality, so I decided to travel. A wizard, Gandalf the Grey, was crossing the mountains so I went with him." It wasn't entirely true, though it wasn't completely a lie either. "He escorted me to a place near the woods, where a giant man, Beorn lives. And Beorn told me that the closest man's town was Laketown. You already know what happened after I left this man."

Lord Thranduil was eyeing me thoughtfully. It was quite obvious that he was hesitating about what he should do with me. The fact that he didn't really seem to know how to treat me didn't reassure me in the least. It was unpleasant to realise how insignificant and powerless I was. I could only hope that this elf was friendly with the other elves I had already met. It might have been stupid of me to use their names.

"You claim to know Elrond." He looked at me suspiciously, his head tilted slightly to the side. "What can you tell me of his land?"

I swallowed quickly and took a short breath to calm my nerves. This elf's eyes were really, really freaking me out. Thorin's glare was not as frightening as that. Pushing away thoughts of dwarves, I concentrated to reply. Somehow I knew my answer would potentially define how I would be treated.

"I didn't speak much with Lord Elrond, but I did spend some time with Lindir who was kind enough to show me around Rivendell. He introduced me to Lord Glorfindel and Erestor too." I had no idea what to say, it wasn't as if I had spent any time with the elves while I was there. Using their names to appear friendly might not have been my best idea. "Rivendell is truly amazing." I ended up adding, because it was true. "I was shocked by its natural beauty, though I got lost in the gardens several times." I paused for a few seconds. "I'm not sure what you want me to say my Lord. I didn't stay there long after all." Admitting this might not be in my best interest, but it probably would be worse if he realised that I actually didn't know much about Rivendell.

The King tilted his head a bit more and seemed to be pondering something. I remained silent and as calm as possible under his piercing gaze. It was far from easy. There wasn't any noise to be heard except for the very faint sound of water trickling. It was so different from Thorin's Halls in that aspect. I had become accustomed to the forge's and mines' noises echoing in the dark corridors under the mountain. In Rivendell anyone could appreciate the soft and peaceful music made by the wind passing in the trees' leaves, by the clear sound of the rivers and fountains, and by the birds. But here, I actually struggled to hear anything. It was rather unsettling.

Suddenly, Thranduil's arm shot in my direction and his cold, long fingers grabbed my chin. He forced me to crane my neck as he stepped closer to me. He was so much taller than me that it was quite frightening. He towered over me, making me feel like an insect next to him. His presence was so oppressive that I stood frozen, completely unable to move.

"There's something…" He muttered at first, observing me as if I were some kind of odd puzzle, until his hold tightened.

I tried not to wince. The way he was holding my chin in his hand was painful, but clearly he didn't care. He tilted my head some more and I had no choice but to oblige him. Pain shot in my neck, but I knew he wouldn't care if I said anything, so I remained quiet. I was starting to really dislike this elf. He was frightening.

"Why do you have dwarvish weapons?" He snarled at me, suddenly looking slightly crazed.

My eyes widened in shock and fear. Shamefully I realized that I had started to shiver. I already thought that he might not be entirely sane, but the dwarves seemed to trigger something in him, something I didn't really appreciate to witness. Obviously it would be a terrible idea to tell him that I happened to like the dwarves most of the time.

I couldn't lie either. Something told me that he would see right through any lie I would tell. I had only one choice left, omitting details.

"It was a present my Lord." I gasped. "When I went to a town called Archet."

His hold on my chin tightened painfully once again. It would bruise, I was certain it would.

"Why would anyone give you such a gift? Who gave you those daggers?" He spat, glowering in front of me. His anger only served to show me how much he loathed the dwarves.

My heart was beating at a wild pace now and I feared what this elf would do if he found out my true relationship with the dwarves of Thorin's Halls. Somehow telling him that I used to live with them and wear their beads didn't seem like the best idea.

"A merchant my Lord. I had helped his injured brother." I blurted out as fast as I could. "I know how to stitch and heal wounds my Lord. I saved his brother. He gave them to me. I swear." I said, staying as close to the truth as I dared. This elf was terrifying me more with each second that passed.

As suddenly as he had grabbed my chin, he let it go and turned back to his throne. I staggered forward a bit. The pain in my neck and chin receeded quickly but I felt my knee go slightly weak as he sat back and looked down on me. His eyes were cold as he analysed me the way someone bored would observe an insect. At this point, I was somehow persuaded that he would never let me leave this place. My little lonely adventure hadn't gone very far.

"Where do you come from?" His voice was once again emotionless and distant.

My lips were trembling a little as I looked up at him.

"I…" What should I do? It didn't feel like he would let me go. Was he going to kill me? Why? He was so completely different from lord Elrond. He scared me so much. I licked my lip before I finally took a decision. Anyway, I didn't see any real way to get out of this, I had no idea what this man wanted to hear. So I decided to stick to what I had been doing so far; say the truth, or as much of it as I could.

"I'm not from here my Lord." I said with my voice trembling slightly. "Not from those lands." I finally added, looking up at him, certain that my fear was now clearly visible in my eyes.

At that moment though, his whole behaviour changed.

It was really unsettling to see him change moods and expressions so quickly. In a swift movement, he was back to his feet and quickly walked down his throne. His eyes were shining with some feelings I didn't dare name. I wasn't sure I liked it more than when he was looking down on me disdainfully.

"You aren't indeed." He whispered.

He extended his hand towards me slowly and I almost flinched, persuaded that he would once more grab me. Surprisingly he stopped his movement, his hand staying just a few inches away from my face. I blinked and remained unmoving. I barely dared to breath at this point. In a corner of my mind, I wondered if it was how it felt to face a giant predator. Somehow I doubted it. Facing a lion or a wolf suddenly didn't seem that frightening anymore; you could fight a wild animal. Somehow I knew that I would never be able to fight someone like Thranduil.

"You're one of them." He breathed out, his eyes widening almost comically.

I had no idea what he would do with this information. There was nothing I could do now. He knew and there was no way I would be able to influence him. It was easy to see this man wasn't going to listen to anything I might say.

Afraid, I waited, holding my breath, to see how he would treat me now.

"Elrond told me of your people." He finally said, walking around me once more, observing me.

This time though, I didn't feel like an insect anymore. No. It was probably far worse as he was now looking at me as someone would look at an interesting creature or experiment.

"He didn't tell me another one had come though." He muttered and then frowned. "When did you arrive?"

His tone was curious now and I let out a breath, feeling slightly relieved that he didn't seem so crazy anymore. I knew it didn't mean I was safe, not yet, but it was still better than before. Clearly he didn't see me as a threat anymore. I just took a very short moment to gather my thoughts before I looked up at him.

"Not even two years ago my Lord." I replied honestly. "I stayed a bit in the western towns at first. People there helped me understand what was happening. Then I met with Gandalf the Grey and he introduced me to Lord Elrond." I could only hope that he wouldn't ask me more details about those people who had helped me. I would be obliged to either lie blatantly or speak of the dwarves, and somehow I doubted he would see my experience with them kindly.

He nodded absentmindedly, his eyes taking a faraway look. He hummed, obviously lost in his thoughts until he looked at me again.

"A healer you said."

I blinked, unsure why he was back on this topic. I chose to remain quiet; I had absolutely no idea what I could say anyway. I was sure he didn't need me to repeat this information.

"Laketown could use a good healer." He nodded to himself, before turning back to his throne. "The master would owe me if I were to deliver one safely to him."

I wasn't sure whether he was aware that he was speaking aloud, so I chose to shut up completely. I was holding my breath. If this elf helped me to go to Laketown safely, I would be indebted to him. Yet, I knew I couldn't refuse his help. I was utterly powerless. He was literally holding my life in his hands. If he wanted me dead, I was sure he just had to nod in the guards' direction and I would be dead in a second.

"Yes." He said a bit more loudly, nodding again. "I'll have you escorted to Laketown. The master will know to thank me, and when the time comes that I need you" He pointed a finger at me with a disturbing smirk on his beautiful face, "Then you'll come to me."

I felt my heart beat so strongly against my ribcage that it was almost painful. At this point I wondered what exactly he would ask of me. It didn't matter how hard I thought about it, I just couldn't find what use I could possibly have for him. Well, that wasn't entirely true. Clearly he was using me right now in order to remind the people of Laketown that he was still there. Obviously he would appear to be kind and fair. He was after all escorting an apparently much needed healer to them. It was quite a good deal for him; the people of Laketown would owe him, as would I. Without doing anything specific he would have people indebted in him. It didn't matter that he might never need me. It was a political and strategical move.

Slowly, I bowed my head. Being respectful and polite would only be positive with this elf. I could tell that he wouldn't appreciate being talked back to. I was nothing, no one in this place.

"I will be thankful for your help my Lord." I said at first. "And if the time comes that you need my help, then I will come to you and help you as best as I can."

There was only one word that sprang to my mind as I saw his smile…predatory.

A cold shiver rand down my spine, but there truly was nothing I could do.

I observed him as he beckoned someone closer. A tall and handsome elf, like any other I had seen so far really, came quickly to his side.

"Make sure that the lady Amelia is escorted safely to Laketown. I want the master there to know she's under our protection. Go there yourself." He ordered calmly, though his voice wasn't quite as cold.

"What of my duty with the guard?" The blond elf asked, frowning slightly and obviously displeased at the thought of being just an escort for a human girl. "And the feast?" He added, not even sparing a glance in my direction.

"Tauriel will take care of the patrols and it won't take you so long that you'll miss anything important." The King replied dismissively before he turned his gaze towards me once more. "Is there anything else that we could do for you?"

I had the urge to say that he wasn't doing anything for me, not really, but I refrained to do so. To be perfectly fair, I was glad for their help, but on the other hand it seemed rather obvious that he wasn't doing it out of the kindness of his heart. After all, it was painfully clear that he expected to gain a lot from this. Just by having me escorted there, he assured that both I and the master of Laketown would be indebted. I wasn't certain why he would ever want my help though, but I didn't ask any question then. Instead I bowed my head again and cleared my throat softly before speaking.

"You have done a lot already my Lord, and I thank you for your help." I saw him nod approvingly at my words but I didn't stop there. "The only thing I would dare ask now is whether you would be so kind as to indicate where my belongings were placed." He frowned lightly and I quickly explained, though I tried to keep my tone as calm as possible. "I cherish those daggers my Lord, because I received them as a gift. I always try to be respectful of gifts given to me, regardless of their origins."

He tilted his head again and stayed silent. For my part, I was trying to force my brain not to conjure memories of beads I had carelessly thrown to the ground. Now wasn't the time. Then, rather suddenly he simply looked away and made a gesture towards the blond elf and the guards.

The younger elf quickly strode to me and pushed me, though not unkindly, and I knew I was being dismissed. Hastily I bowed once more, ignoring the slight pain I still felt in my ribs, before I turned away and left escorted by three elves. My heart clenched painfully at the thought of the lost blades. It seemed silly, I knew, but I cared for them. They were mine. They were a gift from Nori. I didn't want to leave them behind, but I didn't really have a choice right now.

"If we leave now, we should arrive by Laketown tomorrow in the afternoon." The blond elf said without even looking at me as he guided me from one footbridge to a corridor.

The two guards that trailed us wordlessly left when the third elf nodded at them. They didn't even look in my direction as they sharply turned into another corridor and disappeared from my view. I didn't know whether I should be relieved to see them go or offended by their clear lack of manner. I chose not to comment on that behaviour. It didn't really matter. I kept walking a few steps behind the elf that had been tasked to escort me.

At first, I didn't really know what to say, so I kept silent. He was walking rather fast and I almost had to jog to keep up. It was rude of him, but I didn't comment on that either. Still, we would spend some time together so I felt introductions were in order. There was no point in ranting over other people's behaviours. Instead I cleared my throat to catch my companion's attention.

"I know you already know this, but I'm Amelia. In my country we say 'nice to meet you' when we meet someone for the first time." I forced a small smile on my lips.

He seemed to observe me for a short moment before he slightly nodded. He kept walking and didn't say a word at first. After several long seconds of silence stretched between us, I thought for sure that he would never speak to me. I was surprised, to say the least, when he finally decided to reply.

"I'm Legolas Greenleaf." He said calmly and after a slight pause he added with a frown, as if he was trying it out more than speaking to me. "Nice to meet you."

I offered him a genuine smile then as I nodded. Somehow he wasn't so frightening at this moment. He didn't really look friendly, but at least he wasn't as scary as his king was. Finding back my courage and my voice, I decided to try and start a conversation with him.

"I really appreciate your help. I know I would have died without it." I told him in a soft tone before frowning. "Though I'm not too sure what happened."

Somehow, I had hoped he would say something to explain the events. I still wasn't too sure why I had fainted. It didn't seem normal at all. I knew I hadn't suffered any head injury and I had eaten not too long before it happened. I didn't know exactly why I had lost all strength but I was certain it wasn't normal. I really wanted this elf to help me understand.

Unfortunately, he just nodded and remained silent for the next several minutes until we arrived in front of a wooden door. Without knocking or anything, he pushed it and silently invited me to follow him inside the room. Stepping through the threshold, it didn't take me long to realize that this was an armoury. Weapons of all size and shape were hanging on racks. I could also see sets of armours, though I had never seen anything with such a design before. It was most interesting. I couldn't help but notice that the elves' armours were really beautiful too. They even seemed delicate, but I was certain they weren't fragile. What would be the point otherwise?

As I had nothing to do, I looked shamelessly around. My companion seemed determined to be silent and it made me feel slightly awkward. Instead of just fidgeting I chose to look at the beautiful armours while I waited for the elf to be ready.

Legolas walked to the back and I heard him rummage for a short moment before he came back, holding several items in his hands. My heart pounded strongly in my chest when I recognized my daggers, blade and bag. They would give them back. This oddly made me really happy right then. Seeing Nori's presents made me smile. I could remove my braids and throw away everything the beads stood for, it hurt terribly, but I could do it. There was one thing I knew I couldn't do though, and it was to break all ties I had with Nori. These weapons were part of this tie between us. It might have sounded silly, but it was how it felt to me. They were a part of a long history between me and my thief.

I felt much better now that I had them back.

"Do you even know how to use them?" Legolas said, doubt obvious on his features.

"I'm no master." I replied with a shrug. "But they helped save my life several times. The people I lived with for awhile showed me how to fight with them, though I was better with a staff." I took back the weapons he handed me before I let out a sigh at the thought of my lost weapon. "I lost my staff in the mountains. Gandalf and I were attacked by goblins and…well, I lost it."

I stopped abruptly, aware that I was rambling. There was no point in wallowing over a lost staff now. As I busied myself, putting back my weapons in their sheaths, Legolas went to a side of the armoury. I saw him take a key out and open a wardrobe. In there I could see a set of armour and several weapons too. His movements were swift and just, well, beautiful, as he took several daggers and sheathed them quickly. He also took a tall bow before he turned to face me.

Meanwhile I had quickly put back my weapons where they belonged. I longingly caressed my necklace after that. I missed Nori. As that thought crossed my mind, I realized that Legolas was looking at me. Pushing away all other thoughts I focused on him.

I saw him hesitate and frown. His eyes darted to one side and I could tell he was pondering on something, though I had no idea what it could be. Then, always as quickly, he strode in the direction he had looked at and opened yet another door. As I wasn't invited to, I didn't follow him. Instead I chose to patiently wait exactly where he had left me.

My eyes widened and I felt my eyebrows rise to my hairline when he came back. In his hands, he was holding a long, almost ebony black staff. I could see that the centre and the two ends of the staff were reinforced by some sort of silvery metal. I almost jerked back as he handed it to me. He couldn't mean to offer me that, right?

"My father placed you under his protection and you agreed to offer your services to him. To show for this," He paused slightly, clearly unsure of what word to use there. "agreement between you, I offer you this staff in his name."

I blinked.

Several thoughts crossed my mind in an instant. This staff seemed too beautiful to be used in any sort of fight or spar. I couldn't even imagine owning it. It seemed surreal. After scaring me so much, the elves were now giving me presents? Did it make sense? I wasn't too sure. And what did Legolas say exactly?

"Your father?" I stupidly asked aloud, focusing on the last question I had in my head.

There was an awkward silence for a moment, then Legolas replied to my question. Neither of us had moved yet and he was still standing, the staff in his hands.

"Lord Thranduil." He quirked an eyebrow, his gesture clearly expressed how stupid he found that question.

I blushed. It really wasn't something I would have guessed. I hadn't even tried to think about any relationship between the two. They looked alike, but to me so did every elves. I didn't want to appear even stupider than I already did so I didn't voice those thoughts.

Nodding to let him know that I had heard, I took a step closer to him. Ignoring the fact that I was apparently talking to a prince, I decided to look at the staff. He was holding it lightly, allowing me to easily grab it. I glanced at him before I made any move toward the beautiful weapon. He remained as silent and immobile as a statue. Gingerly I took the staff and almost gasped in surprise. It was so light. And so pretty too. On the whole length of it, leaves had been engraved, some were simply chiselled in the wood, but others were made of this very light and silvery metal that reinforced parts of the staff. The wood was smooth under my fingers as I trailed them over the staff's length. The metal wasn't cold to touch. Lightly, I taped one end to the floor, wondering if it was hard enough. The clear sound that echoed almost made me believe that this was actually a music instrument. It was way too pretty to be a weapon.

"I don't know how to thank you for this gift." I said in a small, uncertain voice.

I looked up at the elf who was observing me.

"There is no need." Legolas simply said before turning away and leaving the room.

His behaviour was really weird and I didn't really know what to make of it. I was too used to the dwarves' boisterous ways. The elves' quietness unsettled me greatly.

I quickly grabbed my bag and followed after him, still not really believing that such a beautiful staff could now belong to me. Contrarily to what the dwarves had said, those elves truly weren't so bad. Sure, Thranduil was scary and I wasn't certain he was entirely sane, but he hadn't been especially cruel. I wasn't sure my jaw wouldn't bruise from his grip, and I knew he fully intended on using me for his own benefit but it didn't shock me. In a way, it was what I expected of Kings. Why would he help me just for the sake of it? True, Thorin at first had seemed to do it without real reasons, but my medical knowledge had been used as an argument with him too.

In all honesty, I understood it. It was logical. It wasn't nice or kind but it was logical. Only Dori, Nori and Ori had truly been kind without asking me anything. But now…

The sharp pain in my heart was enough to force me to think about something else.

While I was lost in my memories of the three brothers, I had followed Legolas through the city until we arrived next to tall open doors. I wasn't surprised to realize that the armoury was located so close to the main gates. It seemed logical that if there ever was a need to defend the gates, the weapons should be close by. The gates were magnificent, like everything else here seemed to be. I wasn't sure which material had been used to make them, but I guessed it was wood, though it was very light in colour. Once again they were carved. On each side of each door there were beautiful trees chiselled so finely that they looked almost real.

There were guards here too, but they didn't even spare me a glance. They did bow their heads when Legolas walked past them, reminding me that my escort was actually their prince. Legolas nodded at each of them but didn't say a word and I was starting to think that my journey to Laketown would be a silent one.

We crossed a bridge that had no guardrails and I chanced a look on the side. I saw a torrent rushing under my feet and couldn't help but wonder if an elf had ever fallen in there. It seemed unrealistic that such a bridge had never been the cause of an accident. It reminded me of Rivendell. Why did elves seem to enjoy such dangerous bridges so much?

I ignored those thoughts and quickly crossed, following Legolas. As I looked up, I realized that I faced the dark woods once more. A group of elves was nearby. They were clearly warriors. I trailed behind Legolas as he walked to them. Some glanced at me when Legolas started to speak in their tongue. After a short exchange he gestured for me to follow him and we left.

We hadn't walked far yet when I decided that I didn't want to just stupidly follow someone I barely knew. Not without at least trying to discuss with that person.

"Are we going through the woods?" I finally dared to ask.

"Partly." He replied before glancing at me. "We won't use the old path. As I'm with you, we'll be able to cross directly to the lake. There we'll meet with men and we'll cross."

I wanted to ask him questions about the town, but Legolas didn't really seem like he wanted to speak with me. I followed him silently, at first mostly looking where I placed my feet. After some time though, I dared look around.

I honestly didn't know what to think of this place.

Huge, willowy trees rose up to the sky. Their roots were creating arches, bridges and formed a sort of intricate, natural architecture. Leaves covered the ground. Rocks and boulders were covered with moss. It should have been beautiful and probably magnificent. Yet, as I looked around I only felt deeply sad. As I looked at one particularly tall and majestic tree, I couldn't help but notice the odd darkness that seemed to loom around it.

"Mirkwood used to be green." A soft voice interrupted my thoughts and I realized I had stopped.

A sudden wetness on my cheeks surprised me and I quickly brushed the few tears away. From the corner of my eyes, I could see that the elf was observing me sharply. I ignored it.

"What happened?" I whispered looking at Legolas. He seemed sad too as he gently placed his hand on the tree bark.

"Sickness. Darkness." He frowned and shook his head sadly before glancing at me. "You were lucky a patrol found you."

I swallowed thickly and nodded. I could have guessed as much.

We stayed silent once more for a few minutes before we left again. I could feel Legolas' glance on me from time to time. As we walked, I realized that he steadily increased our speed. We were walking at a fast pace, but it was alright. I could breathe without too much trouble, though my breath was a bit short, and I didn't feel anymore soreness. Travelling with Legolas reminded me a bit of Nori, though I probably should never say that aloud to any of them. It was just that they both were so silent and seemed to avoid obstacles without really paying attention to it. It seemed so natural for them, so easy. The similarity stopped there though. It made my heart hurt to think of Nori, so instead I tried my best to focus on other things.

It wasn't easy.

Except for the trees, there wasn't much to look at around here and Legolas really wasn't the chatty kind.

We did exchange a few words from time to time, but nothing much really.

He wasn't really unkind or uncaring. Actually he did pay attention to what I was doing, helping me keep my balance when I stumbled on roots or rocks. But he just didn't seem to want to speak. The silence didn't bother me too much after a while and I appreciated that he would answer the few questions I would ask about the forest.

I had no idea for how long we had been walking when he suddenly decided to break our companionable silence.

"We've walked faster than I thought." He commented, glancing at me though his eyes were unreadable.

"I've been travelling for awhile." I shrugged as a way to explain why I could keep his pace.

He looked at me curiously before nodding.

"Soon, we'll leave the forest." He said calmly. "We'll stay by the riverside for some miles before we get to the lake."

I nodded absentmindedly. I was surprised to see him take a sort of small and flat gourd. He handed it to me wordlessly.

"Is it the black river?" I asked curiously before gingerly taking the gourd.

"No. This one is larger. It flows under our city." He explained before pointing at the thing he gave me. "Drink a bit of this. We'll keep walking for a few hours still."

"Thank you." I said with a smile before taking a sip. It didn't take me long to realize it wasn't water in there. The liquid felt soft and warm. It was a bit sugary too, but not overly sweet. It was very refreshing too and I felt instantly better, as if all soreness disappeared. "What is that?" I couldn't help but ask.

He smirked but didn't reply, simply taking the gourd back.

I didn't even try to stop the chuckles that escaped me then. He glanced at me as I smiled broadly.

"Fine, keep your secrets."

The small glint in his eyes told me he was amused. I snorted. This elf didn't speak much, but I found myself thinking he was not too bad. Lindir had been nice and helpful. Legolas was silent but seemed not to be as serious and cold as he made himself appear to be. Honestly it only made me curious about him. I felt courage built inside me and I was just about to ask him something when my eyes caught sight of something intriguing.

I closed my mouth and walked towards the thing that I had seen. It was white but I couldn't really fathom what it was exactly. I had first noted it as it seemed to coat one of the trees, but now that I was looking for it, I realized that further away, deeper in the forest, this white thing was on almost every tree.

"Legolas?" I called out as I extended my hand to touch the weird thing. "What is this?" I asked.

"Don't move!" He exclaimed, his tone surprised me and I jolted.

In a few strides he was next to me and was harshly jerking me away from that tree.

I let out a surprised cry when he crushed my hand in his, annoyingly reawakening the pain from my cuts.

His eyes were darting to the trees' tops. He shushed me too and I felt honestly nervous at seeing him like this. It seemed that he was waiting for some sort of attack. After a few minutes though, he tugged me behind him and we left the place quickly.

"What was this?" I asked with a frown before disentangling my hand from his painful hold.

"Those are spider webs." He replied with a frown.

I snorted.

"You don't believe me?" He seemed offended and it made me pause for a moment.

Why would he be offended if he was lying?

"It's just…" I hesitated. "The trees were covered in it." I explained myself. "How many spiders would it take to do that?"

"It's not a question of numbers lady Amelia, but of size." He was now walking fast but I could tell he kept glancing around, observing the canopy.

As I thought about it, I asked myself how huge should spiders become in order to literally coat half a forest in their webs?

"You can't be serious…" I breathed out."How big could they be?"

His glance was enough to let me know how serious he actually was.

And as my eyes widened, I couldn't help but pray that I wouldn't ever know the answer to that question.

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><p><strong>AN: Thanks to all the new readers and all the reviews. **

**It's been a hell of a week, I wanted to post this chapter earlier this week, but just like everyone else, I couldn't access my account so...well, here it comes. **

**I'm mixing the book and movie time lines, as some of you may have guessed. So even if Amelia has traveled for a shorter time in Mirkwood, she meets the elves before the dwarves do. In the book, I can't remember exactly the number of days, but they travel for quite some time before meeting the elves. **

**I really hope you like Thranduil and Legolas. They've been giving me troubles. I wanted them to really have their own characters as they're both kind of important (Legolas less so, in theory, as he doesn't appear in the book, but I find it didn't hurt too much to have him appear in this story) **

**Tauriel appears too...or at least her name does. Do not worry, I took the old poll's results into account. It's just easier for me to 'use' her character, like this I do not have to make up a name. **

**Well, other than that, I'll try to post the next chapter in about two to three weeks, depending on what I manage to write during that time. **

**Thanks for your support everyone!**


	56. A lonely Life

**Everything belongs to JRRTolkien, except for my OC and weird parts of the plot**

**Thank you Eylanan for your kind advices**

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><p>I didn't hide my relief when we finally left the woods. Legolas shot me a curious glance but I just shrugged a bit sheepishly. There was no point in telling him how relieved I felt, not having seen those spiders. It wasn't even the fact that it was spiders that had disturbed me. To be honest any insect large enough to worry an elf would probably terrify me.<p>

The night had been cut short in the end. We had stopped quite late, walking far away from the webs, and I had trouble sleeping. The threat of giant spiders attacking us was enough to transform me into an insomniac. But, who wouldn't be nervous in such a case?

We had been lucky that no arachnid spotted us.

In the morning, the sun hadn't yet risen that we were already walking.

Legolas had decided that, if I couldn't sleep, then there was no point in waiting stupidly. The elf didn't like to lose any time. It didn't matter much to me so I followed him without any complains. At first we had walked quite slowly. Legolas insisted on not using any torches. His eyes were probably as good as the dwarves, but I struggled to see anything. The clouds in the sky obscured the moonlight and it considerably slowed me down. I was thankful when the sun finally rose, allowing me to see where I stepped.

It was mid-morning when we arrived on a riverbank. The trees here were completely different from those we had left behind. Here, the leaves were green and the barks were the usual shades of browns. There were no insanely huge spider webs either. I cautiously walked to the edge and peered down. The water seemed clear enough and the broad river didn't seem as dangerous as the black one had been. As I looked around at the landscape, I noted the small bushes and the pale rocks made a very peaceful sight. At this point, I noticed that I could hear a few birds chirping too. It was a welcomed change compared to the oppressive quietness of Mirkwood.

"We'll follow the river for a bit." Legolas spoke for the first time in hours, tearing me away from my thoughts. "If we're lucky, the barge man will be nearby. Otherwise we'll have to walk along the lake shore."

He walked away as he spoke, easily jumping from the path to a large, flat rock closer to the river.

"Is the lake big?" I asked without looking at him. The ground was wet here and I didn't want to slip and fall. I was cautious as I jumped down.

"It is." He replied evenly.

I rolled my eyes. It was almost annoying that he wouldn't elaborate much when I asked a question. He probably saw my pout though, because I could have sworn he smirked right then. Just a second later, his face was back to his emotionless mask, but he decided to speak.

"Laketown was once a big city. It used to be the main harbour on this side of the lake. It still is, but there isn't much trade going on anymore."

He stepped over a puddle and kept going.

"What happened?" I hastened my pace to walk at his side, completely focused on his story.

He glanced down at me before he shrugged.

"Dwarves." He said with a disgusted grimace.

"Dwarves?" I repeated with a frown. "What do you mean?"

I didn't need to concentrate on my steps so much, we had reached a flat area. The dirt path wasn't even muddy and tall trees shadowed it from my right side. On Legolas' left, the river was flowing lazily towards the lake. It was rather nice. It almost felt as if I was simply taking a walk with a friend. Our discussion though, was quite serious and a bit depressing.

"They used to live in a mountain a few miles from the lake." Legolas sighed deeply and shook his head. "They amassed too many riches and it caught the eye of a dragon." I could see that speaking of this wasn't pleasant for him, so I kept silent while he explained what had happened. "Before the dragon arrived, Erebor was trading gold, jewels and riches of all kind with the men cities. There was another city back then, close to their mountain, but it was entirely destroyed when Smaug came."

He was frowning now.

I was holding my breath. I knew the story, of course. But hearing it from another point of view felt, somehow, different. Legolas wasn't hiding his emotions so well anymore. He almost looked as if he was angry. Whether this anger targeted the dwarves or the dragon, I didn't know.

As we walked he turned silent again for several minutes until I cleared my throat.

"What happened after Smaug came?"

"The dwarves left." He shrugged. "Men who had survived the attack left too. Only some remained in Laketown." He turned to face me then. "Life there isn't easy. It is a small town and men are easily corrupted." He tilted his head. "Being seen as a friend of my father will greatly help you."

"Why did your father agree to help me so?" I couldn't help but ask, frowning. "I know elves are good healers, I don't see how I could help lord Thranduil."

Legolas seemed to ponder his answer for a moment. Before he replied though, he gestured for me to keep following him as he started to walk once more.

"Elves have been travelling these lands for ages. In all those times, they only met one other like you. It is enough of an oddity to make you," Legolas hesitated for a short moment. "intriguing. Why my father could need you though, that I don't know."

I couldn't help but snort at that last part. Legolas glanced at me and I smirked.

"Thanks. So, you think I'm useless." I couldn't help but tease him a bit, smiling, even though we didn't know each other that much.

"Your usefulness remains to be seen." He simply replied evenly.

"Such a diplomatic way to agree." My smile broadened.

He offered me a small grin that made me snort once more.

His words resonated in my mind for a long time though. They were just a little too close to what the dwarves had meant. It was no surprise really, that people in this world were judged by their usefulness, as Legolas had put it. After all, it was the same everywhere. I knew though that my medical knowledge was useful in some communities. I just couldn't see why Thranduil would ask me to help the elves regarding this aspect.

As I kept musing on those thoughts, we finally arrived near the lakeshore. It was huge. I couldn't see the other sides. Hadn't I known better, I would have at first glance thought this was a sea. Legolas didn't stop for me to look around. He quickly made his way down to the shore and I realized that there was some sort of pontoon half hidden between large rocks. The rocks made some sort of natural barrier between the river and the lake, though obviously the water was still passing through. The river was quite large, and its stream obviously not strong, and the rocks didn't even go halfway in the riverbed.

"Are we supposed to wait here?" I asked Legolas as he helped me take the last step on the pontoon, offering his hand to help me maintain my balance.

"The bargeman should come today. He won't be long." The elf simply replied.

"How can you be sure?"

"In a few days there is an important feast for us. The bargeman is supposed to bring some supplies here, mostly wine and fruits." Legolas gestured to one side of the pontoon. "He usually leaves the full barrels here and collects the empty ones that we throw back in the river."

"How do you bring the barrels back? It seems like a rather long way."

"We have small barges too. And when the stream becomes too strong, we place the barrels on carts." He shrugged, clearly not seeing how this could be interesting for me.

It wasn't, not really, but I had been wondering how they managed to get food from the sick forest. Now I had part of the answer. Legolas went to the edge of the wooden pontoon and sat there, his feet almost touching the water. I followed him and sat in the same way, though I was much, much smaller than him.

For the next hour or so, we talked a bit but stayed mostly silent. Legolas was kind enough to answer my questions but didn't ask me anything. I was glad he didn't. I found him quite nice and I was relieved I didn't have to lie to him. He was a calm person, completely different from the dwarves. His answers were usually short, but to the point. He could have ignored me completely, and I was genuinely happy he didn't.

"Won't you be late for the feast?" I ended up asking after we had been silent for quite some time.

He didn't look at me as he shrugged a bit.

"Once you are in Laketown, I'll leave immediately. It won't take me long to come back home, and besides, our feast last for a month and a half."

I was about to ask him something else when he spoke once again.

"The bargeman will be here in an hour or so. It means that we'll be in Laketown around midday."

"How can you tell?" I blurted out, surprised.

"I can see him." He pointed in the lake's direction.

"What?" I squinted my eyes but couldn't see anything on the lake. "How? I can't see anything."

He snorted then, surprising me. From what I had seen of my companion so far, he was hiding his emotions rather well. Or maybe he only did it with people he didn't know at all? Maybe he thought I wasn't a complete stranger? Or maybe my last remark had been so silly in his opinion, that he just couldn't help it. He smirked a bit as he glanced at me.

"Of course you can't." He shook his head. "You're human."

I narrowed my eyes at him. I wasn't offended, after all, I had been used to hear such things when I was with the dwarves. Seeing that Legolas was actually loosening up enough to snort though, that made me want to reply.

"How can you make it sounds as if it's a great insult?"

He chuckled then, surprising me some more.

"It could be worse." He smirked. "You could be a dwarf."

I had nothing to reply to that.

Somehow I was glad that the elves didn't know I had been living with dwarves for two years. I wasn't sure, but I had the feeling they wouldn't have been quite as nice if they had known that fact. I couldn't help but frown. I knew why dwarves didn't like elves. Or, to be more precise, I knew why the dwarves from Thorin's Halls didn't. It all came down to the fact that the elves hadn't helped when Smaug had attacked Erebor. No one could find it abnormal to resent them for their lack of charity. Yet, clearly the elves didn't like the dwarves for some reason, and I found myself curious to know.

"Why do you dislike dwarves?" I asked Legolas before I could stop myself.

He seemed startled at first as he looked at me with a deep frown. Instead of avoiding his gaze, I tilted my head and shrugged.

"I'm just wondering what they did to you, for you to hate them so much."

"They have no honour." Legolas spat and I knew that there was some story to uncover here.

I remained silent for a while, observing him from the corner of my eye. Legolas was frowning darkly but, as our gaze met, he sighed and looked away. For a moment, I thought he wouldn't talk to me for a while, but he surprised me yet again by sighing softly.

"There was this stone they found in the mountain." He started to explain. "Their king decided to name it the King's Jewel, the heart of their mountain. He said it was a sign that he was a true King and he asked for everyone to come and bow in front of him."

I listened attentively as I could tell this story was important. Oddly enough, no one had ever told me anything about a specific jewel in Erebor. I knew from the dwarves' tales that there was quite an amount of precious gems in the mountain, but nothing precise had been named. Legolas kept explaining the story that, in all actuality, should have been told by the dwarves.

"My father didn't mind. At the time, our two kindgoms were at peace. Dwarves are an odd race, but not odder than men, so we had no qualms dealing with them." His voice was calm and emotionless until he frowned again. "But there was a deal they refused to complete."

I frowned at his words. It didn't sound much like what I had seen, though I had to admit I might not know as much about the dwarves as I previously thought.

"For a special occasion, my father had ordered a set of jewels made of the purest, brightest stones." He gazed upwards as he spoke. "I saw them." He said in an enthralled voice. "They shone as brightly as the stars we love so much." He stayed silent for a second before he shook his head and finally spat angrily. "But Thror broke our deal. He refused to deliver the jewels after he showed them to us. He broke his word."

I couldn't help but gasp slightly. It seemed completely out of character when I compared this sort of attitude with the dwarves I knew. For instance, the jewellers in the market took so much pride in their craft, that they were happy when those jewels were sold and worn. It didn't make sense that they would craft something and then keep it.

"Why?" I blurted out, somehow shocked. "Why would they do that? Did they ask for more money?"

"No." Legolas growled. "My father offered to pay more, but Thror insulted him." He sighed. "Thror was greedy. He was sick. My father told him to beware the greed of the north's giant lizard. He told him that his greed would attract the fire breather of the wild plains. But Thror had too much pride."

"What happened when Smaug came?" I swallowed thickly as I asked. There was a question I had asked myself many times, and Legolas seemed oddly chatty right now. "Did you help fight it?"

Legolas looked at me, narrowing his eyes slightly before he tilted his head.

"We came when our scouts reported seeing Smaug." He shrugged. "But it was too late. The dragon was already in the mountain. There was nothing we could do, and no more friendship between us and the dwarves. We had no reason to help them anymore."

It was completely stupid.

This whole story was just that, stupid. There was no other way to put it. When it was put plainly into words, it all came down to; the dwarves were greedy, stubborn and proud. They didn't give Thranduil what he wanted and refused to listen to his advice so the elf decided not to bother.

Well…

And hundreds of people had perished because of that.

What a sad, stupid story.

I sighed and shook my head.

Listening to this point of view certainly opened my eyes a bit. Though it was true that the elves weren't saints, they certainly weren't the monsters that the dwarves made them out to be. I was a bit puzzled to tell the truth. I wasn't sure what to think.

So far I had accepted as an undeniable truth that dwarves had honour and were kind, though stubborn and gruff. But then I had met with the elves in Rivendell. They were different. But this difference didn't really mean that elves were evil or honourless, as the dwarves had implied. Even Thranduil, who was a creepy sort of king, seemed to have a perfectly good reason to be angry at the dwarves. I felt uneasy. Somehow, thinking this way seemed like a betrayal of sorts, though the dwarves had betrayed me first.

"You know dwarves." Legolas stated with a slight frown on his face.

"Yes. I met several dwarves since I arrived in this world." I saw no reason to lie.

Neither of us added anything for awhile before I tilted my head and felt the need to speak. I had no more friends. I was alone. I needed to let some thoughts out of my mind and Legolas was here.

"Glorfindel told me not to trust them. He told me they would betray me someday. Beorn too. He said that dwarves only cared for themselves." My frown deepened, I wasn't sure what I wanted to say after that.

"I have yet to meet a dwarf that I could trust." Legolas simply commented.

"Why did you speak of the stone in the mountain?" I suddenly asked, wondering what the link between the two stories was.

He seemed a bit surprised by my question. Well, he quirked an eyebrow and I assumed it was surprise he was expressing at that moment.

"It is after he found that stone that Thror began to fall truly sick. He was greedy before, but no more than any other dwarves. After, he loved his treasure as much as a dragon would." Legolas clearly thought such behaviour disdainful. "His mind fell sick."

I nodded, thoughtful.

The dwarves I knew didn't seem that much obsessed with gold and gems. But then again, there wasn't much gold or gems in the Blue Mountains. Had I truly learned to know them? I couldn't picture my sweet, kind Ori obsessed with gold. Though old and dusty tomes were probably gold in his eyes…

And Bombur? He loved to cook, to taste new things and to prepare meals for his friends and kin. Could he become sick like Thror had? I couldn't imagine it. Nor could I see Bofur loving gold more than he loved to tell stories and sing.

As for Nori…well, a dwarf who had spent the biggest part of his life looking for family heirloom didn't really strike me as the greedy sort. Thinking of him was painful. It hurt me deeply to let my memories wander, and it hurt even more to picture my dwarves as anything but honourable.

Yet some of them had decided to abandon me. Bitterness quickly spread in my heart as tried to push away the feelings of betrayal and pain I still felt.

Thankfully, a soft lapping sound made me look up. I could now see a low barge-like boat arriving in our direction.

Trying to lighten the mood I pointed and looked at Legolas.

"There. Now I see it."

The elf snorted goodnaturedly and didn't reply. He stood up and helped me to my feet. It took around fifteen minutes for the barge to be close enough that the man navigating it called us.

"Good day my lord." He said loudly. "Are you here to check the barrels?"

"Greetings." Legolas called back, but now the barge was right near the pontoon, so there was no need to shout. "I am here to escort the lady Amelia to Laketown. Can you help us cross the lake?"

"Sure my lord." The tall man said, looking in my direction. "Just give me a moment to unload the barrels and I'll take you to Laketown."

Legolas simply nodded and moved away from the man's way. It didn't take him a lot of time to moor the boat to the pontoon and start to unload the heavy barrels. It did give me some time to observe him. As every human I seemed to have met so far, he was tall. He probably was as tall as Legolas. He had long dark brown hair and a beard, though nothing like the dwarves'. He obviously was strong as he had no real problem moving those huge barrels from his boat to the pontoon. His clothes were ragged, clearly old and often used. All in all, he looked like any hard working man in this world seemed to look.

Once he had unloaded the last barrel, he gestured for us to go onboard. Legolas kindly helped me and we were soon on our way.

"What is your business in Laketown my lady?" The man finally asked as we drifted swiftly on the lake's dark blue waters.

"I'm a healer." I replied, offering him a smile. "I was told Laketown might need someone with such knowledge."

He nodded thoughtfully.

"Well, we have old Hector." He shrugged. "But the man's so old that he doesn't see much anymore, and is actually more ill than his patients are."

"Then it is lucky that lord Thranduil thought of having the lady Amelia escorted to Laketown." Legolas stated calmly.

"I s'pose it is." The man replied evenly before looking at me once more. "I'm Bard by the way."

"I'm Amelia." I smiled at him. "Nice to meet you."

He didn't reply and none of us spoke anymore. Wordlessly I walked to the front and looked at the waters. There was fog here and there, but overall the day was clear and the sun shone brightly. I couldn't have missed the impressive sight even if I had wanted to. As I glanced up from the deep blue waters, I saw a huge, lone mountain standing high in the distance. My heart started to beat faster but I kept my emotions private. I didn't want to share this odd thrill with the two men. I didn't think that any of them would understand. I didn't understand why I felt this way myself. This mountain seemed like so much more than a pile of old rocks. It seemed alive.

I shook my head, feeling that my own thoughts were silly.

Instead of hurting myself, thinking about the dwarves, I decided to look on the other side of the boat. I was quite surprised to see huge rocks in the water. It looked as if they had been carved by men. Leaning on the guardrail, I tried to look a bit closer at the stones and realized it were actually ruins.

"What are those?" I asked no one in particular.

There was a moment of silence before Bard replied.

"Laketown used to be much bigger. I guess this is part of the old port." He shrugged while pushing on the bar, avoiding some of the ruins.

"It was." Legolas said, coming to my side he pointed at a tall structure. "This used to be a guard tower."

I nodded, trying to imagine what it could have looked like but unable to do so. Soon enough, the remnants of Laketown's past were left behind in the fog and I saw the actual town appear ahead.

My stomach clenched.

I truly didn't have good memories of men's towns so far. I could only hope that this place would be different.

I gaped slightly when I realized that the town didn't seem to be built on the lakeshore, but on the lake itself. It immediately reminded me of Venice, though Laketown was nothing like the famed city. There was neither magnificent palace here, nor anything even remotely romantic looking. The town itself was built in wood, as had been most of the men towns she had seen. From afar, I could only tell that there were only few buildings that were actually high, though several had at least three or four stories. I could see a sort of tower too, but that was it. It didn't seem big, though it was undoubtedly bigger than Archet and Lunetown. Still, it was strange to think that this town I was looking at from afar had one day in the past been prosperous enough to have stone buildings and bridges. My mind had trouble reconciling the ruins of Laketown's past to its current state.

"How many people live there?" I turned to look at Bard who shrugged.

"It isn't that big a town." He replied evenly. "Couple hundreds, maybe even three hundreds, definitely no more. It's a small town, everyone knows everyone."

It was small alright.

The fact that they lived mostly on water was surprising too. I couldn't help but wonder how they grew any sort of food here. They couldn't only live off of fish, could they? After the exclusively meat oriented life I had lived with the dwarf, I wasn't' looking forward to a life full of fishes.

It didn't take us much longer to arrive near the town's entrance. Bard navigated the barge skilfully, slowing us down to a stop in front of part wooden, part metallic gates that blocked the entrance into the town's waters. I didn't pay any attention to the men as I approached the gates, while staying on the boat, and glanced in between the bars.

I swallowed thickly at the sight.

This town was dirty and most of the buildings I could see looked as if they were just about to fall in disrepair. There was definitely nothing similar between this place and Venice.

I startled as the gate shook and started to move upwards in a grinding noise.

Looking over my shoulder I saw Legolas walk to me. He stopped just behind me, at my right, and crossed his arms.

"Welcome to Laketown." He said evenly.

I didn't reply and simply looked grimly in front of me as the barge moved forward smoothly.

Bard guided us towards one of the biggest and tallest buildings around. I could see carved figures and decorations on it but nothing really noteworthy. As we arrived near a pontoon, Bard stopped and nodded at me.

"Here you are, lady Amelia. The master of Laketown will be there."

I offered him a small smile as Legolas helped me jump on the pontoon.

"Thank you Bard, I hope we'll see each other again."

As he started to push his barge away from the pontoon he offered me a smile and nodded.

"It's a small town after all." He called at me before leaving.

I didn't have any time to even think about a reply. Legolas was already striding in the direction of the doors. He was already knocking loudly on them when I joined him there. I would have more time to observe this place later, as I was supposed to stay here for quite a while.

The door opened only a fraction and a short, frail looking man just barely looked at us as he spoke.

"The master doesn't want to see anyone today." He sounded terribly annoyed and bored. "Come back another time to complain."

As he was about to close the door back, Legolas placed his hand on it and calmly said.

"I'm quite sure the master will agree to see me."

The change in the man's behaviour was instantaneous. He startled quite violently before he opened the door widely, bowing deeply in front of Legolas. To be honest, it was sickening to witness it. I barely managed to contain a sneer at the sight.

"Master elf, of course the town master will see you." He said in an overly sweet voice. "Please, enter."

Legolas didn't say a word as he crossed the threshold and I quickly joined him inside. It seemed obvious that elves were significantly more appreciated than dwarves. The short man eyed me suspiciously, no doubt observing that I was human, because his smile was almost completely wiped off of his face when he looked at me.

"May I inquire as to why you are accompanied by this young girl, master elf?" He said, ignoring me and walking to Legolas.

"You may." Was the elf's reply.

The man clearly expected to hear something else, but as Legolas remained silent, I couldn't help but snort at the servant. He was obviously disappointed. Legolas glanced at me and, if I hadn't been used to look at Nori's expressionless face, I would have missed the glint in the elf's eyes.

My companion was both annoyed and amused. I could tell.

After a long silence, the servant finally understood that he wouldn't have any answer. Bowing once more lowly, he guided us to a room where we were invited to sit near the hearth. He informed us that the town's master would soon arrive and simply left the room with yet another bow.

I looked around only then.

The room was small, or rather quite clustered by a vast amount of items and objects of all kind. It wasn't dirty per se…but it looked like a mess. The house was obviously made of wood. The hearth, or so it was called by the servant, was actually nothing more than a wood-burner made of some sort of metal. It was small compared to the big hearth in the dwarvish halls or the huge one in Beorn's house. It worked though, sort of. The air was still cold and somewhat humid. I couldn't help but shiver slightly as my eyes roamed over the books and scrolls that were covered in dust on the shelves.

There was a heavy carpet on the floor but it was obviously old and I could easily spot dirty patches on it.

I swallowed with difficulty the lump that was forming in my throat. If this was the house of the master, supposedly the richest man in town, then I could already picture how the other people lived. Clearly poverty was an issue around here.

I had seen how men towns were, and it shouldn't have been a surprise to realize this one was just like the others. It was maybe even worse in a way, because I was here to stay…

I frowned and rubbed my hand over my forehead. What a mess my life had become.

As I was about to wallow in my memories again, the door opened widely and a fat, greasy looking man wearing ridiculous clothes came in.

"Master elf!" He exclaimed, a fake smile plastered on his round face. "It is always a pleasure to receive you. What can I do for you?"

Legolas was standing near me, his arms crossed. He remained silent for a short moment before he replied.

"Lord Thranduil asked me to escort the lady Amelia to your town." He said calmly, placing a hand on my left shoulder.

The eyes of the man immediately riveted on me. I couldn't say what he was thinking though, because he didn't seem to have any reaction.

"It has come to our attention that you may need the services of a good healer." Legolas stated in a monotone voice.

"Yes, indeed." The master said, clasping his hands together while he smiled.

"The lady Amelia is a trained healer. She is currently under Lord Thranduil's protection. We are expecting you to provide her with what she might need to settle here."

It was short and to the point. Somehow, I felt glad that Legolas quite obviously stated I was under his father's protection. I had an odd feeling that I might need such help. This man looked quite similar to the master I had met before in Gorm. He was ugly. He was fat. He was greasy and I didn't trust him one bit. As my eyes slowly trailed over him, I couldn't help but note the smears of unknown origins that seemed to cover quite a lot of his odd tunic. I wasn't used to see anything like this sort of clothing. The dwarves usually wore leather, wool and linen. Fur was only used for the warmest, winter cloaks. The elves I had met seemed to wear light clothing or leather, for the warriors such as Legolas. All in all, their clothes were made for people who worked and moved around. This man had a yellowish tunic made of velvet and fur, but not the warm kind of fur. Not at all. Here it seemed to only have a decorative purpose around his collar and at the end of his sleeves. I could see that the buttons of his tunic were made of some sort of metal and were decorated.

It honestly shocked me.

These materials were probably really expensive. I wasn't stupid. It was obvious that these sorts of clothes weren't usual. I had never seen anyone else wear anything looking quite so costly, except maybe the elves but well, they were another matter.

All in all it gave me a very bad impression of the man who stood in front of me. As he cleared his throat, I was forced to look at him and concentrate on our conversation once more.

"Very well. There is an empty house she can live in and use." The man said with a smile that looked even more forced than before.

"I am most thankful for your help." I finally spoke, though I was lying at the moment. Still, Legolas was still here and I wanted to use his presence as much as possible. "I have most of the tools I need for my work with me, but I will need supplies at first, in herbs and the likes. Will you also be able to provide those?" I had trouble forcing a sweet smile on my lips.

"Of course, of course." The man nodded hastily under Legolas intense gaze. "We will provide all you want for your settlement, young girl."

"Lady Amelia." I was surprised to hear my voice pronounce those words. "Or healer Amelia, if you require my help for any health related question."

"Right." He wasn't quite able to hide the disdainful sneer that crossed his face.

"Lady Amelia will be staying here, but as I said, she is under Lord Thranduil's protection. We will enquire about her well-being." Legolas added before turning to face me. "I will take my leave now, unless you need me."

I knew he didn't expect me to need anything else from him. It felt somehow as if all this was just a show he put for the master and I was glad he did. Somehow I felt in my very bones that I would need all the help I could get. Life was about to become quite harsh, I was certain of that. The difficulties I had faced so far would probably be nothing compared to those I would face.

I was alone now.

"It was most kind of you to escort me here." I said to Legolas, smiling genuinely at him. "It was a real pleasure to make your acquaintance. I hope I'll see you again."

He blinked before nodding slowly.

"It was most interesting to meet you, Lady Amelia." He offered me a small smile, barely a quirk of his lips, before he added. "Your kind is most unusual."

On those words he bowed his head to me and barely nodded to the master before he strode away. I took a deep breath, encouraged by his last words that I took as a compliment. My kind, he had said, and somehow I doubted he considered me in the same way he did men around here. I was a bit different after all.

As the door closed behind him I looked at the master once more. He wasn't pretending to smile anymore, but I knew that he would be at least polite. After all, I was clearly a friend of the elves and, from what I understood, these people needed the elves or at least their money.

"Would it be possible to see the house you talked about now?" I asked in a polite, yet rather emotionless tone.

"Of course, lady Amelia." I could tell by his tone he didn't like to call me that. "Do you have any belongings that need to be carried for you?"

"No. I just wish to see this place, then see what your market has to offer concerning herbs." I replied evenly.

"Alfrid!" The master suddenly bellowed.

Not a minute later the door opened on the short man who bowed in front of the master.

"Take the lady Amelia wherever she wishes to go."

The servant, Alfrid, looked at me with a sneer he hid behind a smile and nodded before gesturing for me to follow him. Taking a deep breath I nodded to the master and left.

That day was going to be long and probably unpleasant.

* * *

><p>I sighed and looked around slowly.<p>

The day had indeed been long and had taught me one thing; I really, really didn't like Alfrid. The man was a stupid, contemptuous worm. I shivered at the thought of him and decided to think of something else.

My eyes looked around me.

I was in my new house. The place was actually quite big, especially considering the fact that I would be living here all alone. There was a large kitchen and a living room on the ground floor. On the second floor there were no less than three different bedrooms. I had no idea what I would be doing with so much space. Besides, there even was a sort of balcony that ran all along one side of the building, facing the lake and barely a couple meters away from my neighbours' roof. That was one of the thing I disliked most around here, the fact that there was almost literally no space between the houses. I didn't like the fact that my balcony was a jump away from someone's roof. Granted, the jumper would need to be fit but I was certain it was possible to jump down.

Most of all I had been surprised to see that my house wasn't in fact completely on the lake. It had been one of the questions I hadn't had the time to ask Legolas, but I had wondered whether the whole town was built on the water. As it turned out, it wasn't.

The town master's house, the market, and a good two-third of Laketown's houses were built on piles. But then there were several bridges that led to a part where buildings were built on the shore. From the quick look around I had, I could tell that my house was close to the farmers' properties. A town needed more than fishes to survive, and it was only logical that some people would farm vegetables.

Well, at any rate I had been surprised to find out that my house was partly built on the beach, with a good chunk of it being built on piles. The kitchen was on the beach's side of the house, and I knew I was lucky because part of the kitchen was actually made of stone. It allowed me to have an actual hearth. The entrance gave directly to a very small patio, with one door on each side, one being the kitchen's door, the second the living room. Facing directly the entrance door were the stairs that led to the second floor. All in all it felt as if I had one of the best places around and I couldn't help but wonder how far exactly the town master would go to please Lord Thranduil.

Night had fallen now and I wanted nothing else but to go to sleep. Looking at the sheets and blankets I had bought earlier with the master's money in the market, I decided to camp in my kitchen tonight. The house was far from clean and I didn't want to dirty the clean linen by using them before I had the time to thoroughly clean the house.

The following day, I busied myself by doing just that and making a thorough inspection of my new home. It hurt to think of this empty house as my home, but for now I had no other choices. I tried my best not to think about the dwarves, but it was difficult. Having shortly experienced the harsh environment of Mirkwood, I couldn't help but worry about them. Besides, I was somehow quite sure that Lord Thranduil wouldn't be quite as kind as Lord Elrond if he had to deal with my, well, my former friends.

It took me a few days to get everything in order in the small house, and to my dismay I was forced to go thrice more to the town master's house to ask for some help.

In the short time I had been here though, I had already found out that Alfrid wasn't really liked by most people and the master was downright hated too, though no one seemed to think of saying so quite aloud. It was mostly a feeling I had when I was in the market with Alfrid and two guards with me.

The people here didn't seem really friendly, but when they spotted my escort they mostly turned really suspicious, almost glaring at me too.

It was quite hard to experience this. I was smaller than most and people would easily disregard me completely. They didn't know me and didn't trust me. I was trying my best to keep strong. I had survived my trip so far, I shouldn't be scared by people when I had faced goblins, orcs and wargs. I had to be brave, though I wasn't sure why I should anymore.

When I first started to live with the dwarves, at least I had company. I had to work hard to repay their kindness. They might not have seen it this way, but I did. As for now I wasn't certain why I was trying to work hard at all. In an odd, twisted way, I was still trying for the dwarves' sake. If I could prove to them that I wasn't weak, that I could survive without them, then surely they would…

They would what?

Accept me back? Take me with them to Erebor?

After my stunt at Beorn's place I wasn't sure that the king would show me any sort of kindness.

I suddenly felt like crying.

Swallowing back the tears I tried to think of something else.

Looking through the small window in my kitchen I could only see the sky darkening once more. Another day had passed. Looking at the small pot that was on the stove it suddenly struck me that the quantity I was cooking would never suffice to feed anyone but myself.

I was truly alone.

Not feeling hungry anymore I took the pot away from the stove and glumly went upstairs to sleep.

As I lay in the dark, tears finally rolled down my cheeks and I quietly cried myself to sleep.

* * *

><p>Days passed and now that I wasn't walking around with Alfrid or guards anymore, people slowly started to be kinder with me. As no one knew me much yet, I had to go out of my house to let everyone know I was a healer and could help them. It started by giving advices to people at the market. I was going there with a basket full of my herbs and ointments in small pouches and I would try and notice who might need some help.<p>

Considering the fact that I lived in an obviously poor community, in a place humid and cold, it was no wonder I quickly had a lot of patients.

Most people suffered from colds and coughing fits. There were few elders who also had pains in their joints and some I suspected suffered from gout. Quickly though, one of my best client became the town master himself. This man was disgusting. Every time he felt a tingle in his body, he would call for me and I had to give him some sort of medication for illnesses he made up in his mind.

People slowly started to come to my house and I didn't need to look for patients to treat anymore.

I had made the living room into a healing ward. One of the bedrooms upstairs I had transformed into a laboratory of sorts where I could prepare my ointments and dry my herbs. The second one was left with a few extra beds for patients who would need to stay here longer than a few days. So far I had been lucky and no one had needed them.

Soon enough, I had almost spent two weeks in Laketown with nothing much happening and I hadn't heard a word about dwarves yet.

Life wasn't boring, but it was without a doubt lonely.

One evening, I was just about to go to bed when someone urgently knocked at my door.

Frowning, I quickly went back downstairs and opened it. I quirked an eyebrow when I saw a young boy there, looking really scared.

"Lady Amelia, please, my sister." He said in a hurry, swallowing half the words he pronounced.

Looking behind him I saw he was alone.

"Where is your sister?" I asked in a calm voice.

"Back at home. Dad sent me." The boy gestured in the direction of the town before he started speaking very fast again. "She's feverish and she doesn't talk anymore."

I frowned.

"Give me a moment."

Quickly I gathered my satchel and a basket. Without losing any time, I grabbed pouches containing herbs that might help. The problem was I didn't know of what the girl was suffering, except that she was feverish and might have lost consciousness. The herbs I had around here were not quite the same I had access to in Thorin's Halls either, but some, like feverfew, were thankfully found everywhere.

I quickly checked in my mind that I had grabbed whatever I could think I might need before I went back to the young, nervous boy.

"Show me the way." I said, closing the door behind me.

It wasn't hard to follow the boy as he ran through town, but I was glad I had trained and travelled with dwarves. He ran fast, using possibly every shortcut he knew of. Once he realized I was able to follow him, he even took some really unstable passageways I wasn't sure were meant to be used this way. As I tried my best to keep my balance on a small plank between two boats, I cursed inwardly. This was not funny.

Soon enough he lead me to a small house, quickly running up a volley of stairs, he opened the door and immediately called for his father.

"Father, father, I brought the lady Amelia!"

I followed him inside, quickly noting that the house was indeed small. I could easily tell they weren't rich folks either. From the tools lying around in the corners, I guessed their father was a fisherman, or at least fished to feed them. I didn't have any time to think about this anymore as I heard steps and a man leaned out of a small door at the back of the room. I immediately recognized him.

"Bard!" I exclaimed. "I didn't know you had children." I commented as I quickly strode to him, guessing his sick daughter was in the room he was currently in.

"Lady Amelia." He nodded at me. "I'm sorry to call on you so late at night, but Tilda, my youngest daughter…"

I stopped him with a gesture of my hand.

"That's not a problem." I told him before concentrating on what was important at the moment. "Where is she? Your son said she wasn't speaking, is she sleeping or unconscious?"

"She was having a nightmare earlier, but for some time now she hasn't said a word. I can't wake her."

The fear was easy to spot in his voice and eyes. Walking in I realized another girl was there. I nodded at her before looking at the small, pale and feverish face that was half hidden under blankets.

I immediately went to work, feeling her throat at first, and then examining her thoroughly. After I asked Bard some questions, I was quite certain that the young Tilda was suffering from a bad flu. This was bad. Flu was deadly in my previous world, and even more so around here. Looking at Bard I realized that the two other children were still here.

"Can you please boil some water." I asked the girl before I glanced at the boy. "I also need some clean bowl, if possible clean it with boiled water too."

Once the two left us I turned towards Bard. He hadn't been fooled. I could tell by the desperate glint in his eyes that he knew I had bad news.

"She has the flu." I simply said in a low voice.

He hid his eyes behind his hand but couldn't quite hide his pain from showing through.

"She was always tired those past days." He said in a broken voice. "She started coughing a lot today and had headaches too. The fever," He paused and closed his eyes, shaking his head. "The fever started today too."

"I can help." I said softly before grimacing. "But I can't promise anything."

He nodded, still not looking at me.

"It'll be best if we move her to my place. I can care for her better there, and there will be less risks for your other children."

Bard took a few steps and knelt beside his daughter, softly caressing her hair. Numbly he kept nodding.

"I haven't…" He said before shaking his head. "I heard you accepted different types of payment." His voice was hoarse as I nodded.

Most of the people around didn't have much money. I wasn't here to take what little they had, so I had accepted several times to be paid with fresh fishes, herbs and vegetables. I had even accepted that one of my patient's brothers repaired a broken chair in my place. It was very, very weird but I knew I had to adapt.

"Sigrid" He cleared his throat. "She's working with seamstresses. Maybe you need something? Or Bain can help you. Or I could fish some…" He was rambling so I cut in.

"Don't worry about that for now. We'll figure it out later." He looked at me surprised as I continued. "Let's concentrate on Tilda, alright?"

As he was kneeling next to Tilda, it was easy for me to place a hand on his shoulder and squeeze lightly. He glanced at me and managed a small, tired smile. A short moment later, Tilda's siblings came back with the water and I immediately started to work.

I explained what I was doing to Bard, but had to ask the two children to leave the room before anything else. They weren't happy to obey, but had no choice when Bard ordered them to listen. Once I had done everything I could for that evening I looked at Bard as I stood up.

"You'll have to air this room as much as possible and clean those blankets and sheets." I instructed tiredly.

He nodded and I sighed.

"I can't believe the weather is so cold here. Isn't it summer still?"

"This year is really bad." He commented, his eyes not leaving Tilda for a second. "We haven't had such a bad summer in years, though they aren't exactly hot around here."

Quickly counting in my head, I realized I had left Beorn a month ago, bringing us to mid august. I suddenly wondered where the dwarves were but had to shake my head, forcing myself to concentrate on something else.

Every thought of the dwarves were still accompanied by a sharp pain in my chest and if ever I thought about…Him, then I started to sob loudly. It was crippling to say the least and now wasn't the moment to start weeping mournfully. Swallowing hard I looked at Bard.

"We should move Tilda to my place tomorrow."

He nodded and we both remained quiet for awhile.

I stayed at his place that night, not really sleeping as I tried my best to keep watch on the young girl. Without any alarm clock, it was difficult to get any kind of sleep, so Bard and I decided to keep watch in turns. The following morning, we moved Tilda to one of the beds upstairs and Sigrid proposed to come back that night, to help me keep watch on her sister.

The reason I had met Bard again wasn't really a happy one, but in a way I was guiltily glad I had the chance to meet him and his children.

Quickly, I found out that the oldest girl was a very kind person.

Sigrid was calm and collected. She was curious and smart too. I kept explaining what I was doing when I prepared Tilda's treatment and soon Sigrid was able to help me efficiently. She was taller than me, which was disheartening in a way, though not surprising considering that I was a midget.

Bain was something else. He adored his father, that much was obvious and he was trying hard to follow his example. He came every day to check on Tilda, often followed by Bard too. Bain wasn't interested in Tilda's treatment, he just wanted her to be healthy again. The young boy kept telling his sick and feverish sister tales about knights and princesses. It made me smile, but I often had to cut short his tales, not allowing him to stay too long near his contagious sibling. Still, it quickly became easier for Bard, Sigrid and Bain to just share my meals before Bard and Bain left for the night.

On the fourth day, Tilda seemed to get slightly better, which only mildly reassured me. Flu was a tricky illness, and I was certain that Tilda would have a relapse, which she did.

"I thought she was getting better." Sigrid murmured, tears in her eyes as she wiped Tilda's forehead.

Bard and Bain had left a little earlier, after diner, and we were now left together.

"It's often like this with the flu." I softly commented.

"When will she get better?" Sigrid looked at me pleadingly and I couldn't help but wince a little.

"I can't tell Sigrid." I sighed. "Listen, I can do everything I can, but it doesn't mean I'm Mahal." I was busy pouring some Echinacea's powder into a jar. I had been really glad to find this plant during one of my daily walks in the wood near the shore.

"Mahal?" Sigrid raised an eyebrow.

I cringed and wanted to kick myself. I was tired, but it wasn't smart of me to make such mistake. Sigrid was looking at me curiously and I shrugged.

"Er, well. I'm not a Valar. I am not all powerful." I sighed loudly again. "All I can do is my best, and sometimes it's not enough." I carefully closed the jar and placed it on one of the shelves that lined the walls.

I was finally starting to have a nice collection of dried plants in various states. It took time to gather, dry and then prepare all those plants. My eyes looked over the various pots and jars. I took out a roll of parchment and a piece of charcoal while Sigrid remained at her sister's side.

"I know." Sigrid lowered her head and looked away.

I nodded, letting her know that, even though I was doing something else, I was still paying attention to her. Quietly I checked the different lines and comments I had written on the parchment. It was an inventory of the plants I had right here in my ward. I had another one in the room upstairs concerning the plants I was currently drying. It was a simple way for me to organize myself and my products. At least, this way, I could easily keep tabs on what I had, as I used those plants much more often than I did back in Thorin's Halls. People around here tended to be sick much more often than dwarves did.

After a moment of silence, Sigrid decided to speak once more.

"I wanted to ask you something."

I encouraged her to continue with a gesture as I rolled the parchment and placed the charcoal in a small pot. Immediately, I started to check and tidy the tools I had used that day.

"Will you accept me as an apprentice?" Sigrid said quickly.

I almost hurt my neck as I quickly turned to look at her.

"I beg your pardon?" To say I wasn't expecting this would be an understatement.

Sigrid stood up and smoothed her skirts before looking me straight in the eyes.

"You have been here barely three weeks and everyone already agrees you're the best healer we ever had. I would really much appreciate if you accepted me as your apprentice." She spoke evenly though her words were a bit rushed. I could see her blush a bit too and I hesitated.

"Sigrid I don't know…" I had no idea what to think or do.

"Please, I'll work hard." She insisted.

"What about your work with the seamstresses?" I crossed my arms and tilted my head.

I had never even thought about one day having an apprentice. I didn't consider myself a master. My throat tightened painfully as one of my hand naturally went up to touch an absent bead. I closed my fist and looked away, refusing to think about Oin and Dís.

Sigrid seemed to hesitate a bit before she took a deep breath.

"I could work with them still and train with you too."

"Sigrid," I kindly chastised. "I'm quite sure this wouldn't work." I looked at her face and inwardly groaned. "Listen, I'll think about it, but I'm not promising anything. I'll give you my final decision in a few days."

She nodded and I left her alone with her sister for that night's first watch.

Once I was alone in my room I let my thoughts wander towards painful memories.

I couldn't help but wonder what Dís and Oin would do in my stead. Biting my lips I closed my eyes tightly. I had avoided thinking about the dwarves as much as I could, but it seemed that the longer I waited, the more painful it became to think of them. With trembling hands I touched the hair on both sides of my face and barely contained a whimper at the lack of braids.

Oh Mahal, how I missed life in Thorin's Halls.

Had I made the right choice in leaving after the dwarves? Wouldn't it have been better to just wait for their return? Of course it would have been excruciating to wait in Thorin's Halls, not knowing how the dwarves were doing, where they were, or if they were still alive. But at least I would have been with Dís and Danà. At least I would still be welcome in their halls. Silent tears rolled on my cheeks as I painfully thought that right now, I had no idea where the dwarves were and I was almost completely alone. Dís and Danà were a world away, and I was quite sure that they wouldn't like the stunt I made in Beorn's home. I had rejected the dwarves. It had seemed the good thing to do at the time, but now I wasn't so sure. Why in Mahal's name had I been so stupid, so stubborn? Why couldn't I just obey my king and kin?

I had to press a hand tightly over my mouth to try and contain the sounds of my sobs.

Removing those braids hadn't helped me in any way. It probably had just proved the king that I was a childish girl. And what a childish girl I was indeed.

Anger quickly rose in me though.

I had every right to be angry at them that day. Maybe I had once more overreacted, but I wasn't wrong. Not entirely at least.

Shivering, I let my hand caress the necklace I still wore. I clenched my fist as my heart painfully throbbed.

Nori…

What would he think if he saw me like this right now? He probably wouldn't appreciate it. I had to be strong, if not for me, then for his sake at least. Taking a shuddering breath, I managed to calm down a little and my thoughts cleared a bit. I was certain of several things still.

I loved Nori. I was utterly and irrevocably in love with him. Being in Laketown right now would allow me to know when the dwarves would arrive in Erebor. Even though the mountain was far from the lake, I was quite certain the dwarves would come here first, if only to resupply for food. Hopefully I would hear of their coming here. Then I would see Nori and let him know I would wait here for him. Once he was free to come back for me, I knew with certainty he would. Meanwhile I had to make sure to prove those dwarves I wasn't weak and could make a life for myself anywhere I chose. I had to show them I was resourceful. I had to make them realize I was strong.

I was an asset.

They would take me back.

They would ask me to come back.

I took a deep breath and smirked. It had taken me a good month but I felt suddenly better. I wouldn't survive around here. I would live. Smiling I decided that I would have to talk to Bard about Sigrid.

After all, maybe having an apprentice wouldn't be so bad.

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><p><strong>AN: Thanks to all the reviews and the new favourites and followers. It's great to know that I don't just write for myself. **

**I hope you all enjoyed this chapter. I'm once again mixing book and movies. I'm using the book timeline here (because in the book, the dwarves spent quite some time in jail) so it allows some time to Amelia. I'm also using some movie characters...rest assured that some of them are just making an appearance. **

**Slowly but surely the second part (the one concerning the quest) is coming to a close. I expect it to last for maybe 8 or 9 chapters) After that we'll see where it goes. I'm still not decided yet whether or not I'll do a massive epilogue or a proper third part. I mean, this story is huge already and I don't know if 1) you'll keep following me for who knows how many chapters 2) I'll have the time and courage to go for another round of 20 to 30 chapters. Any way, let me know what you think/ want. There's still time to decide so no rush. **

**The next chapter should be updated in 3 to 4 weeks. I'd like to make it a monthly update. This way I'm sure I have the time to do it and you're not feeling disappointed if I don't update in 2 weeks time. **

**Thanks again everyone for being so kind and supportive! **


	57. The Beginning of an odd Friendship

**As usual, everything belongs to JRRTolkien, except for the OC**

**Thanks to Eylanan for her help**

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><p>Two days later, I was glad to find myself alone with Bard.<p>

It wasn't even unusual for the both of us to be sharing a drink after the bargeman came to check on his youngest daughter and to be frank, I was often glad to speak with him. Even though I was busy and didn't have much time to think about my loneliness, it was always nice to become acquainted to new people. Besides, I genuinely thought that Bard was a nice and friendly man, and we saw each other often because of Tilda.

Tilda wasn't faring so well these past days, but this afternoon, her fever had finally broken. I was convinced that she would soon be feeling better. Bard was obviously glad for this and we were now both sitting in my kitchen. He was drinking ale from a few kegs I had received as a payment after helping the brewer's wife to give birth to his first son. Bard was enjoying the ale while I was drinking camomile. It still brought me peace to drink it, though now it also brought memories of happy times in Thorin's Halls.

Bard and I were silent, each lost in our own thoughts. It wasn't unusual. Even though we often discussed together, we would as often just spend quiet time like this. From what I understood, Bard worked a lot to try and get enough to feed his family. He was often tired, exhausted even, but kept going for the sake of his children. I could only respect that. What I hadn't expected though, was to realize that my job as a healer extended to more than what I previously thought. I didn't simply have to heal others. I had found out in quite a short time, that people expected me to be there for them, to counsel them or simply listen. Psychology wasn't my forte, and to be frank didn't interest me much, but I didn't have much choice. People would sometimes just come here for really minor reasons, and would end up shuffling around, talking until I offered them a drink and some peaceful and quiet time.

Bard was one of those people who sometimes needed my help in such a way, though I doubted he consciously knew it.

At some point though, I needed to break the peaceful silence to speak seriously with him.

"Tilda should soon be alright." I said at first, starting with the topic he'd expect me to talk about. "She might be weakened though, she's still young, so she will have to be careful not to catch another cold."

"Aye. I'll make sure she's careful." Bard nodded before he offered me one of his rare, small smiles. "Thank you. If it weren't for you, I'm not sure what would have happened."

"I did what I could." I shrugged, blushing a little. Clearing my throat, I added after a short time. "I wanted to speak with you about Sigrid."

"Sigrid?" He frowned. "Is she unwell?"

"No, no she's perfectly fine." I calmed his worries immediately. "But she asked me something the other day, and I wanted to discuss my answer with you."

He didn't say a word but frowned, waiting for me to continue.

"She wants to become my apprentice." I told him, noticing his surprise at that comment. "I told her I would think about it, but as I said, I wanted to talk to you before I take any definitive decision."

"She never said she wanted to become a healer." Bard seemed stunned. "Why did you want to speak with me?" His sharp mind brought him out of his surprise and he concentrated on me.

"Well, there are a few things we need to discuss." I placed my cup on the table and looked at him. "First, I can't afford to pay her." With a gesture I pointed at his ale. "As you can see, people don't pay me with money often."

He nodded thoughtfully.

"Would that be the only issue?" He asked calmly.

"No. If she truly wants to become a healer, she will have to work hard." I commented seriously. "Don't misunderstand me, I'm quite sure she's smart enough to learn." I wanted to insist on this, Sigrid was smart. "But becoming a healer is a real commitment. It takes years to learn everything, and in all honesty, you always have to keep learning. I wouldn't mind teaching her what I know, but she would have to work with me or learn on her own almost all the time. I don't think she should spend half her time learning, and the other working with the seamstresses. And if she doesn't work, that's yet another hardship for you." I added that last part in a low voice.

Bard was a proud man. I didn't want to offend him but I knew that life hadn't been easy on him. Sigrid had told me how they lost their mother a few years back and how hard life was with just Bard's income and what little money she made sewing clothes.

Bard seemed to think really hard for awhile before he looked at me, his gaze intense.

"Do you think she could become a healer? A good one I mean."

I tilted my head and pondered my answer.

Sigrid was calm and collected, as I had already noted. She was smart too and had remembered my instructions easily when we were taking care of Tilda. The fact that she was a decent seamstress made me think she'd be able to do at least decent stitches, though I wouldn't be sure for as long as she wouldn't have stitched anyone. After all, sewing muscle and skin back together wasn't really the same as sewing fabric. I had no idea how she would react to blood. I had no idea whether or not she would keep her calm under pressure.

"I won't lie." I replied, locking my gaze to Bard's. "I can't be sure. Not until she proves herself. I have no idea how she would react the first time she would need to stitch someone or help ill people." I frowned and Bard leant slightly back. "But," At this simple word he focused back on me completely. "I think she has potential."

"How long would it take to find out? About her reaction I mean." Bard asked me.

"It depends." I shrugged. "I can't really foresee when someone with a cut will come in to require my help."

"And you'd be willing to teach her?" He leant forward again.

"Yes." I nodded.

"Then please, accept her as your apprentice." He said, bowing his head and placing both his hands flat on the table.

"Are you sure?" I insisted, not because I didn't want to, but because I knew he would struggle even more without Sigrid's small income.

"I'll work even more if need be. If it means Sigrid can become a good healer, then I know she'd have no trouble later in life."

I nodded. It was true. I understood it now. Excellent seamstresses were rare and found work rather easily, but good seamstresses weren't that uncommon. A good healer though, that was something even rarer than an excellent seamstress. Many people had some basic knowledge of plants, like feverfew for example, but nothing past this point. Becoming a good healer was hard and hence you instantly became useful if you were one. She wouldn't have any trouble being welcomed in any town she wished to settle in, even if they already had a healer. The fact that the people of Laketown all knew my name and were all now kind to me was a proof of this. Nowadays, they were all at the very least polite, because they knew they might need me and there was no one else they could turn to. The previous healer, an old man, was just too old now and had been too old for several years. He was sick and his eyesight had worsened with time. I had met with him a few times, and we both knew he couldn't help the folks around, except maybe by sharing his knowledge with them.

"I'll do my best to make her a good healer." I smiled at Bard who smiled widely for the first time since I met him.

"Thank you Amelia." He said, still smiling.

"Well, just tell her I want her to come here tomorrow morning." I simply added.

Not too long after our discussion, Bard left with Tilda. The little girl wasn't healed completely, but there was no need for her to stay here at night anymore and I knew she would feel better with her family. I had given rather strict instructions about her diet for the coming week though.

The following day, I woke up refreshed after the first full night I had since Tilda had been moved here. Without any haste I put on my clothes, smiling softly as I thought about how shocked people around had been at first when they had seen me. Obviously, my long tunics and breeches weren't what womenfolk wore around here. No one had dared comment on it though. Apparently everybody knew I had been escorted here by the elves. That plus the fact that I was a good healer, well, it made people more lenient towards me and my little quirks. As I made my way downstairs, I heard someone knock at my door. It was still very early, so I frowned a bit, wondering who might be there.

I opened my door, thinking it was a patient, only to find Sigrid smiling at me.

"Thank you so much Mistress Amelia. I won't disappoint you." She bowed low as she spoke and I was left, blinking at the threshold.

"Er…" That wasn't my best moment.

To be entirely honest, this whole 'mistress' thing was really weird for me. I didn't want to be called that. I knew Oin was called 'master' sometimes, but I had never heard anyone call Dís 'mistress', though that might have to do with her usual title. Why call her mistress when she could be more simply called princess? But anyway, now wasn't the time to think of this. The only thing I knew for sure was that I didn't like that title.

"Alright." I cleared my throat. "Please, don't call me like this."

Sigrid looked at me, visibly puzzled and her smile becoming uncertain.

"I'm no mistress Sigrid." I sighed with a smile.

Actually, I wasn't even a doctor as I hadn't finished my studies in my previous world. I frowned, even now this wasn't a happy thought. I shook my head slightly and concentrated back on Sigrid.

"If you really feel the need to use a title, then call me either healer Amelia or lady Amelia while we're working." I relented, knowing well that I would have to get used to this at some point. Most people kept calling me lady anyway so it wasn't so odd to hear it anymore.

"Alright, lady Amelia." She said, her smile huge once again.

I gestured for her to come in and she followed me to the kitchen.

"First things first," I placed some water to heat as I hadn't had breakfast yet. "Do you know how to write and read?"

She blushed a little and shrugged.

"I know my letters, dad made sure we all did." She replied before adding. "But I don't use them often."

"Alright" I nodded, before pouring camomile in two cups. "It might be helpful for you to keep notes of what you learn, in order for you to remember."

She nodded and as I sat I added.

"I don't know the letters you use here." I chose to use the same expression she had. "Where I come from, we used different ones, so I won't be able to help you for awhile, though I'm planning to learn soon."

Sigrid remained silent, slowly blowing on her camomile tea and sipping a bit of it as I observed her. I wasn't sure how or where to start. I wouldn't try and make her go through a parody of medical school, nor could I really just throw knowledge at her the way Oin had done with me. I had previous knowledge she didn't have, and I didn't have books like I had in med school.

"Alright." I said, startling her. "Listen, at least for now, we're going to do this. You'll follow me whenever I go to treat patients, or when people come here. I'll explain to you everything I do as I do it." I explained to her. "If no one comes, we'll work either on your writing and reading, or on other knowledge you need." Musing for a moment I added lately. "And I'll try to find a way to make you practice stitches."

Sigrid didn't say a word and simply nodded eagerly.

"If you ever have a question, ask." I looked at her seriously. "I'd rather you do that instead of doing something wrong." Once more she nodded as I stood up. "Good, now, we have a few things to do this morning." As I spoke I rinsed my cup and left it to dry on the small, stone workbench I had in my kitchen. "We need to clean all the sheets used by Tilda. We also need to clean the healing ward and the room upstairs. Cleanliness is of outmost importance and that is one thing I will never be lenient with."

I had placed one hand on my hip and was pointing my right index at her. She nodded yet again and couldn't help but smile.

Well, so far so good. At least she was listening to little ol' me.

We were sweeping the floor and dusting shelves in the healing ward when I heard someone knock at the door. Quickly I went to open it, only to barely stop a groan at the sight of Alfrid. Instead I managed a polite smile.

"Good morning Alfrid, how may I help you today?" I asked.

"Lady Amelia," He said as a greeting and I gritted my teeth at his lack of politeness and cold tone. "The master would like to see you as soon as possible." He continued in his overly sweet yet condescending voice. "That is, right now."

I narrowed my eyes at him and crossed my arms. He seemed to falter a bit as I glared at him. I hadn't been afraid to stand under Thorin's glare, Alfrid couldn't possibly have any effect on me. I knew very well that, at first, he had thought that my short size would allow him to bully me, but I hadn't relented and now we both knew he didn't scare me, at all.

"What is he suffering from?" I kept my tone polite.

"You're the healer." Alfrid retorted rudely. "That's your job to find out." He added with a fake smile.

"I'm the healer here, that's true Alfrid." I said, using a sweet voice. "And you'd better remember who it is exactly you're talking to." I didn't want to use my trump card today, any mention of Lord Thranduil was enough to scare both Alfrid and the master, but I shouldn't use it too often or else they'd be used to it.

Alfrid didn't add anything and simply shuffled uncertainly on his feet before he finally swallowed thickly and looked back at me.

"The master is waiting."

"Wait here." I coldly replied, pointing at where he stood.

I closed the door, not bothered one bit by the rudeness of the gesture. Quickly, I walked back into the wards and went to grab my satchel.

"Alright Sigrid. You're lucky, we're going to see our best client." The tone of my voice probably was enough to let her know I was being ironic. "The master is sick." I added before grabbing my cloak.

She quickly took hers and as we left, I grabbed a small wooden plank the size of my hand. It was a simple plank where a cross had been painted in red. I used it whenever I had to step out of my house, letting people know I wasn't there. This little trick had proved useful in the past week, since I actually implemented it and I knew most people, if not everybody, knew what it meant already. If there was an emergency, people will instantly know to look for me in town. I had been surprised when I first realized just how much the people of Laketown were observing each other. It seemed impossible to step outside of your house without anyone knowing it immediately. Sometimes I even had the feeling that I was being followed but I never could prove it.

Alfrid was still there when I opened my door and I smirked slightly. He was about to speak when he saw Sigrid as she came out behind me.

"What is she doing here?" Alfrid almost snapped.

"She's my new apprentice. She's coming with me." I replied coldly.

"All apprenticeships have to be approved by the master." He retorted in his condescending tone. "And I don't think he'll approve of that one."

"Then we'll ask him when we're there, shall we?" I didn't care what he would say anyway, and I smiled at Sigrid to let her know so.

Alfrid was about to give me his opinion again when I turned to face him and growled angrily.

"Unless of course you wish for the master to come here all on his own Alfrid. Because Sigrid is following me, whether you want it or not."

He sneered and gestured for me to follow him as we crossed Laketown.

We didn't exchange any word as we made our way through the dirty streets. After several weeks spent living here I had sadly grown used to the filth. It wasn't to say that I enjoyed it or even lived without seeing it, no, I just managed to force myself not to cringe as I saw rotten vegetables or fish bones on the ground. The market was just as bad. For my part I was just glad that I lived near the shore. At least it meant that I could go to the nearby stream to get fresh water to drink. The fact that the peoples' toilets were just above the lake's water, water most of them then used for other things…

Urg, it made me gag every time I thought of it.

At least, after listening to me rant, a few people were now starting to go fetch water at the stream from time to time. Some had decided to try and use small cisterns too, but their sight always made me cringe a bit, bringing back memories I didn't feel like sharing.

We walked quickly up the stairs that led to the town master's door and came in without having to wait. Wordlessly I removed my cloak, grabbed Sigrid's and handed both to Alfrid.

"I know the way." I told him as he was about to protest. I took a step in the direction of the stairs when I turned and looked at the servant once more. "Be careful with it, it was a present." The threat was easily understandable in my voice and even Alfrid heard it.

Without further ado, I walked upstairs, followed by Sigrid, and knocked at the master's antechamber's door.

"Come in!" I heard before a wet cough.

I opened the door to find the master seated near the window. His room was quite large and his bed covered in heavy blankets and furs. Obviously, even though the town looked quite poor, the master had more than enough money to live comfortably. Drapes and tapestries covered the walls, probably as a way to insulate the place. Heavy curtains hung on each side of the window too. All in all I doubted the master would feel the cold in here, especially not when the two heaters were working. Still, he always seemed to be sick.

"Master," I said bowing my head slightly. "When did this cough start?" I enquired immediately, not wanting to spend more time than necessary in here.

"Yesterday" He replied before glaring at Sigrid. "What's that?"

I placed my satchel in Sigrid's hands and rolled my eyes, though she was the only one to see it. Walking to the master I started to work, explaining at the same time what I was doing. The master didn't say a word until I was quite sure he only needed one ointment and one type of herbs to fight this bad, probably exaggerated cold and cough.

"Sigrid is now my apprentice." My tone was clear enough, this was a statement, not a question.

"If you needed an apprentice, you could get someone else."

"Yeah, well, I'm sure Lord Thranduil would approve of my choice." I said dismissively before I walked out. "I'll give the medication to Alfrid, as usual. Keep yourself warm."

Sigrid hadn't said a word, but I honestly didn't mind. Actually it was quite smart of her, I wasn't sure the master would have appreciated it. I silently noted that I would one day have to ask Bard about the obvious hate the town master felt towards him and his family, but now wasn't the time. Once back downstairs I gave Alfrid an ointment, telling him to apply it on his master's chest regularly and a pouch containing a mixture of herbs that would help both his cough and the fever.

All in all, it had taken us an hour to go there and come back.

As we were back in my house, safely hidden from curious ears, I turned to Sigrid and offered her a small smile.

"The master is always sick." I said while I hanged my cloak back on the hook in the hall. "Mostly he suffers from cold and paranoia."

Sigrid chuckled lightly and shook her head.

"You should be careful lady Amelia, the master isn't trustworthy." She carefully told me, obviously uneasy.

Her eyes were darting around and she appeared quite nervous. It was quite kind of her to speak about a topic that obviously worried her.

"Don't worry, I know."

As we spoke I walked back in my kitchen and, rather suddenly, my eyes were caught by the staff gifted to me by Legolas. I hadn't used it at all since I came here. Actually I hadn't trained for awhile. I frowned deeply and berated myself silently. It seemed that I had pushed everything related to the dwarves so far in the back of my head that I even had forgotten about this. I wasn't happy with myself.

The dwarves wouldn't be happy either.

Well, that shouldn't have mattered, but it still did.

Wordlessly I walked to the corner where I had left the staff and caressed its dark wood. It was a pretty weapon, but I knew it could be deadly too. I had been stupid, I realized it now. I shouldn't have forgotten about my training and I definitely shouldn't have been wandering around without any sort of weapon on me. This wasn't Thorin's Halls. How could I believe people here could be trusted?

Thank Mahal I had realized my mistake before anything had happened. From now on I would train every day and I wouldn't leave this house without at least one hidden blade. Nori would be angry with me otherwise.

"Lady Amelia?"

Sigrid's voice finally reached my mind and I turned to face her.

"Sorry, I was thinking of something else." I grinned apologetically. "Well, let's get to work. I want to make some supplies, I'll show you how to prepare the ointment." I clapped my hands loudly and pushed aside thoughts of training for now, I wouldn't forget about it anymore though.

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><p>Two more weeks passed in a similar way.<p>

Every morning Sigrid would come to my place early, and we would start our day by either cleaning the wards or preparing plants. That tedious part of the job had never bothered me, and it seemed it didn't bother Sigrid either. She apparently didn't mind having to sort out the plants, placing them in neat bouquets that we'd dry in a part of my kitchen. For my part I still enjoyed sorting out leaves and flowers and then reduced them into a powder and mixing different one together. It was a good thing in my mind that Sigrid liked this part of the job. After all, it was what I did most of the time. It wasn't as if dying patient came in every hour of the day. To be fair, they didn't even come in every day.

Throughout our day, Sigrid would shadow me when I treated injuries and illnesses. But if there wasn't anyone to treat, then we would both work on our letters during the afternoon. I had borrowed several books from the town master and had forced Sigrid first to practice reading and then practice writing. For my part I had been busy learning the alphabet used by the men here. It hadn't been too difficult. They didn't use runes like the dwarves, and their letters were reminiscent of the ones used in western countries back in my world. It was just a matter of recognizing the letters, then the reading part came quite easily.

I couldn't even explain the joy I had felt when I first managed to read some words on my own. Never before had I realized the importance it had.

I could read again.

I could write again.

From that day on I started to accumulate books of all kinds. It wasn't stealing per se. The master had told me he didn't need the books related to medicine so I took them and brought them to my place. It was more logical for me to have them rather than to have to go to the town's master place every time I wanted to read something, and if some other books found their way to my place amidst the others, well it wasn't entirely my fault, was it?

I knew I should have been ashamed, but I honestly wasn't. I didn't care much for that man. The master was stupid and didn't read those books, he didn't need them nor did he care for them. It probably was one way for me to push the guilt away, but after a short time I stopped bothering. The master never even realized I had taken some more books than was strictly necessary.

My love for books was renewed and in some odd way, it felt as if I was rediscovering some old, forgotten part of myself. It was true I had enjoyed when Nori or Ori read for me. But the feeling of being all alone with only a book for company was peaceful. I was happy.

That aside, the only noticeable things that happened during those past weeks were, first that I started to train again and second that an elf, not Legolas, had come in town and had asked to see me. Apparently lord Thranduil wasn't about to forget about my existence and was clearly planning on paying attention to it. It served as well to renew the caution with which Alfrid and the master used to treat me. I was genuinely surprised though when I met with the elf who barely exchanged a few words with me before he left Laketown not even two hours after having knocked at my door.

As for my training, I was happy to exercise again, though I was on my own endlessly repeating series of movements I had been taught. The slight difference in weight and length between my new staff and the old one was soon forgotten and moving with this new one became as easy as it had been with my first staff. It probably wasn't great to be training on my own, but at least it gave me some time to be entirely alone. And it allowed me to focus my mind on myself.

If I were entirely honest I would admit that, as the weeks passed, I started to worry more and more. It wasn't normal that I hadn't heard a word about the dwarves yet. Even if they hadn't taken the same way as I did to cross the forest, they should have arrived on this side already.

Nightmares started to plague my nights again as I feared my friend had met some other dangers on their way. Another part of me was trying to be reassuring, maybe they just hadn't stopped in Laketown. Maybe they already were in Erebor. Maybe…

I felt a sharp pain emanate from my heart and resonate in my whole chest.

Since my arrival in this world I had never been away from the dwarves for so long.

I wouldn't lie and say I didn't care or didn't hurt. The truth of the matter was simply that I had a gift to be as oblivious as humanly possible. In a way I was perfectly capable of pushing aside the painful thoughts. It allowed me to live and work on a daily basis, but clearly once I couldn't suppress my own thoughts, my worries took control of my mind. At night, pain and worry were all powerful in my head.

I sighed loudly, earning a curious glance from Sigrid who was busy crushing some feverfew into a thin powder.

"Is everything alright?"

"Don't worry for me Sigrid." I dismissed her worries easily before grabbing a clean pot I would use to store some ointments. "How is your family, I haven't seen them in awhile." I changed the subject, more interested in my friends than wallowing over my pain.

"Tilda is better now." Sigrid said with a relieved smile.

I nodded, pouring the mixture I had been working on in the pot I just grabbed.

"How's your father? And your brother?"

"They're alright." She softly replied before frowning a bit. "We think father might be followed."

I immediately stopped what I had been doing. I had realized easily in the past weeks that there were some sort of peculiar tension between Bard and the master, but I wasn't sure where it came from. The obvious answer would be that Bard was quite obviously more popular than the fat, disgusting man that ruled over Laketown, but I couldn't help thinking there was more to it than that.

"What makes you think so?" I asked, crossing my arms and observing my apprentice.

"It just seems that there's always someone waiting in front of our house." She shrugged before brushing away some hair that fell in front of her eyes. "I don't know." She sighed. "Father seems bothered and he won't talk to us. He doesn't want to worry us."

"He's just trying to protect you all Sigrid." I smiled kindly, patting her shoulder.

We were about to continue our work when I heard someone knock. Usually, when people were in dire need of my help, they wouldn't bother knocking at all. Clearly it was no emergency, so I took the time to clean my hands properly and put my back my tools in their proper place, leaving Sigrid to keep an eye on everything in the kitchen.

I had to keep myself from frowning when I opened my door to see Alfrid.

Mahal, I despised him.

"Lady Amelia, the master has visitors and wished for you to come and greet them." He sneered at me and I barely swallowed back a harsh reply.

"I'll come as soon as possible." I replied as indifferently as I could.

"It wouldn't be wise to make him wait too long." Alfrid thought important to add.

I was just about to close my door back in his face when I stopped to glare at him. I couldn't help but be slightly pleased when he seemed uneasy. Before then I honestly hadn't realize I could have this effect on someone. I was short, shorter than adults, and to see that even though my size was that of a dwarf, I could still make some men react this way was oddly pleasant.

"I said I'll come, Alfrid." I almost snarled at him. "But the longer you stay, the longer it'll take me to finish what I have to do." I took a deep breath and enunciated clearly. "So go away."

He was about to retort something, but I didn't give him the time. Shutting my door strongly, I walked back to the kitchen to let Sigrid know she'd be alone for awhile. I didn't see the point in having her tagging along. Most likely the master just wanted to parade me to some other men, showing off that he had a good healer. It was ridiculous and exactly the kind of things this revolting man would do.

Mechanically I grabbed the belt and sheaths with my twin daggers and put it on. I always wore my hidden blade in my boot and a smaller one under a leather wrist band I had bought in the market weeks ago. I didn't wear the ones gifted to me by Dori, Nori and Ori, simply because it broke my heart all over again each time I did. The leather belt, the wrist band, and the hood were safely hidden in a large wooden chest in my room. The weapons though, I didn't want to leave them behind. People had looked at me strangely the first time I walked around with the twin daggers but I didn't care. I felt safer with them. I didn't use the staff daily though, it wasn't very practical in the clustered city that was Laketown.

"I'll be back as soon as possible." I told Sigrid who nodded, as always paying attention to what I said. "Send for me if there's anything happening. Don't hesitate. And if I'm not back in a few hours, just go back home." I instructed before I finally got out.

I didn't waste any time. The sooner I would meet those people waiting in the master's house, the sooner I'd be able to go back to my house.

I knocked loudly at the large door, waiting for Alfrid to open it. I barely glanced at him when I came in, walking to the room where I knew the master would be with his guests.

I knocked and couldn't help the large smile that popped on my face at the sight that met me inside.

"Legolas!" I exclaimed, not even trying to hide my happiness at seeing the elf prince here.

It was true we barely knew each other, but I genuinely appreciated the elf. He was odd, but rather nice.

"Lady Amelia." He nodded, a small quirk of his lips letting me know he was happy to see me too. "It is a pleasure to see you so well."

"I'm happy to see you too." I said, completely forgetting about the master's presence in the room. "What are you doing here? Does Lord Thranduil need something from me?" I couldn't forget that I owed the elf Lord a service.

"No." He shook his head lightly. "Lord Thranduil only sent me to review some contract and enquire about your stay here."

"What about the feast you told me about? Aren't you missing it?" I enquired with a frown, remembering he had told me it lasted over a month.

"I am only missing some minor festivities currently. The main banquets and feasts are held at the beginning of each week." He explained in his calm tone.

The master cleared his throat loudly right then, rudely reminding us that he was still there. Clearly, Legolas didn't think much of him either as he looked coldly at the fat man.

"If you don't mind," The elf said, though it sounded to me as if he couldn't care less what the master thought. "I would like to be left alone with the lady Amelia."

"Well, that is..." The master started at the same time as I spoke.

"Maybe we could go back to my place." I ignored the master completely. "I'm sure Lord Thranduil will be interested to know how my working here has been going."

"Alright." Legolas nodded quickly, clearly as eager as me to leave this stuffy place.

In about ten minutes, we were back outside and I couldn't stop myself. I sighed loudly. Legolas quirked an eyebrow at me, but I shrugged. We walked silently, side by side, towards my place. The last time we had been together, I had been tired and hadn't paid any attention to people around. Now though, things were different. As we made our way in companionable silence, I realized that people's behaviours were rather odd. They were scurrying away, almost bowing in front of Legolas and quickly turning the other way. It wasn't difficult to see that they were all either really scared or really amazed by the elf. I wasn't too sure which it was.

Glancing at the elf, I realized that he didn't even seem to realize what was going on around us. Actually it wasn't so much that he didn't realize, it was more likely that he was simply used to it. I tilted my head lightly, thinking about how different this felt, compared to when I had visited men's towns with dwarves.

As I arrived in front of my door, I didn't bother thinking about this anymore. What would have been the point anyway? It wasn't as if it would change anything, though it was admittedly interesting to notice the deep difference in men's behaviour depending on which other race they were interacting with.

I smiled at Legolas and let him in.

We quietly walked to the kitchen and I realized only then that it might have been better to tell Sigrid I had company.

The poor girl reacted in a way that reminded me of myself. Clearly, she had never seen an elf, or at least never that close. She froze mid-step. Thankfully she wasn't carrying anything at that very moment or else it would have been on the floor already. Her mouth hanged open and her eyes were riveted on Legolas. Several seconds seemed to pass before I reacted. It probably was shameful of me, but I had been too absorbed by my observation of Sigrid to do anything but stare curiously at her. The young girl finally clapped her mouth shut and blushed terribly, babbling unintelligible words.

"Sigrid." I said, trying to catch her attention and help her. "Let me introduce you to prince Legolas." Glancing at my elf companion, I smiled and continued. "Legolas, this is Sigrid, she's my apprentice."

"My lady." Legolas bowed his head politely and I feared for a second that Sigrid would faint.

"My lord prince." She squeaked before attempting a weird curtsey.

I cleared my throat, unsure of what to do in order not to appear extremely rude. I really liked Sigrid, but I doubted she enjoyed the situation she was in. Yet I wasn't sure whether she was blushing because she thought Legolas handsome or whether she was embarrassed. I decided to cut this short and walked to her.

"Sigrid. You can go home for today." She nodded at me, though her eyes were still glued on Legolas who was now looking around. "Go." I repeated, pushing lightly on her back.

Once I heard the front door close behind her, I couldn't help but chuckle a bit and look at Legolas.

"Do you have this effect on every human girl you meet?"

He quirked an eyebrow at me, once again and tilted his head. At this moment I couldn't help but wonder whether he could express other emotions on his face.

"I don't recall you acting the same way." He finally commented dryly, though a small twitch at the corner of his lips let me know he was probably joking.

"Thank Mahal for that." I laughed before paling significantly.

Legolas, who had been looking at the powdered plants immediately turned to look at me. His eyes narrowed on my face and once again he tilted his head. I couldn't read his face at all. It was blank. Even the look in his eyes was guarded and I wasn't able to know what he might be thinking at this moment.

Silence stretched between us, though it wasn't nearly as comfortable as it had been earlier.

I inwardly cursed myself for my slip.

I knew elves and dwarves weren't on the best of terms.

I knew Mahal was the dwarvish divinity, or something like that.

I held my breath as Legolas took a step in my direction.

"Mahal?"

For a moment I wondered what I should do. Obviously it would be pointless to pretend nothing had happened. The simple fact that I had reacted this way made it clear that I knew I had said something I shouldn't have. Sighing loudly I took a seat and gestured for Legolas to do the same.

"I feel this is going to be a weird conversation." I softly said, not really managing to look at him. "So you might as well sit."

He didn't say a word and didn't move at first. He took a short moment to ponder his next action and thankfully decided to sit and listen.

"You know already that I met some dwarves after I arrived in this world." He nodded sharply, his eyes judging me, evaluating me. "Well, they actually were the first people I met when I arrived. They took me in and helped me adapt to this place."

Legolas' silence was unsettling. I wasn't sure how to react and suddenly felt uncomfortable.

"I got on well with them, mostly." I cleared my throat. "They were really kind. I spent a lot of time with them. They even taught me how to defend myself." I added as I saw my staff from the corner of my eyes. "And one of them taught me about plants and medicine in this world." I gestured at the pots filled with ointments around us. "I was a sort of healer apprentice in my previous world, so it didn't take me that long to pick up what was to know here."

Legolas was listening attentively but I still had no idea what he was thinking. After all, I had been more used to boisterous and loud people in the past two years. The calm, almost cold, demeanour of the elf was now completely out of my comfort zone. Even Nori, who was one of the quietest dwarves I knew, was still easier to read than Legolas.

"Why are you here?" He finally asked.

"I didn't lie to your father." I breathed out. "I was making my way here alone. I had been travelling with dwarves until they decided that I couldn't and shouldn't follow them anymore." I didn't fake the bitterness in my tone. Clearly, even if I missed them, I still was really hurt and angry at the whole betrayal. "They thought I was too weak or something and at the time Laketown was the closest town I could go to, so I decided to try and cross the forest on my own."

He seemed to ponder on my answer and I kept quiet. I didn't want to speak about it that much, though in a way I felt as if it would do me good. Still, from what I had gathered dwarves and elves weren't really on friendly term, and that was putting it lightly. I was almost certain that the elves from Mirkwood would actually hate the dwarves. It wasn't really complicated to guess why, especially not now that I had learned some stories from the elves' point of view.

"Dwarves can't be trusted." Legolas finally declared, sneering disdainfully. "You are better off without them."

"They were kind to me." I half whispered.

"But they betrayed you when you needed them most." His cold stare forced me to look elsewhere.

"Can we not talk about it anymore?" I shouldn't be surprised by my own reaction. Even though time had passed and I missed my friends and Nori terribly, it still hurt like hell to remember that they abandoned me. "I was glad to see you, you know. Though we don't know each other, I was still glad. I don't like men around here." I half whispered before shaking my head and adding. "Well, some of them are nice, but…" I sighed and didn't finish, I still couldn't explain why I couldn't get along so well with human people when I was one.

He seemed ready to say something but didn't. I was surprised to see him sigh quietly and then he nodded.

"Are the people where you come from so different?" He asked, obviously trying to comply and change topics.

"Not so much." I finally admitted. "The world is completely different, but character wise, it's not that different." I shrugged. I wasn't lying either, people weren't fundamentally different, they were just less, well, evolved.

"Then why don't you like it here? It should be familiar." He pointed out.

"What can I say? I don't feel at home anywhere." I wouldn't tell him that I had truly loved it when I stayed with the dwarves. "Though Rivendell really was a lovely place and had this homely feeling."

He nodded understandingly. Silence once again fell in the room, but this time it wasn't as oppressive as it had been. Feeling a bit better and less skittish, I smiled at him.

"Do you want to drink some tea?"

After that, we avoided talking about anything that could be related to dwarves. For a few hours, Legolas stayed with me and kindly answered some of my questions about this world, elves, and many more topics. I also tried my best to reply to the questions he asked me too even though I wasn't sure how most of my descriptions of technology were understood. It was an interesting discussion and all in all I felt that I understood the elf a bit more. Somehow I had the feeling that this was the beginning of an odd, yet interesting and beautiful friendship. Even if I couldn't be certain, it seemed that Legolas at least respected me and that he valued my opinion, to some extent at least. One thing was sure though, we would both avoid the topic of dwarves. It was obvious we wouldn't be able to understand each other and would probably never agree.

I wasn't stupid. I knew little old me couldn't hope to change the elf's mind, especially not when it came to dwarves. After all, from what I had gathered, he had hundreds of years, if not thousands, to make his mind.

Around lunch time Legolas stayed and didn't seem offended when I only served some vegetables, bread and cheese. He even offered me one of his rare smile, assuring me that, even though he was a prince of sort, he wasn't above enjoying a simple meal. From there, our discussion changed as he explained he was more of a soldier than a courtier. There apparently wasn't a real court in Mirkwood anyway. At this point he kindly regaled me with stories of old battles and fights.

I was completely focused on our talk and didn't react at first when I heard someone knock on my door. It was when Legolas stopped and quirked an eyebrow at me that I realized I actually had to go.

I was already expecting to see one of the villagers or even, Mahal forbid, Alfrid. What I wasn't expecting though, was to open my door to face another elf. This one was a woman with long auburn hair. I blinked before I called out.

"Legolas, I'm quite sure it's for you."

From the corner of my eye, I saw the eyes of this new elf narrow on me. Her mouth was in a thin line and I could tell she was angry, or annoyed. Maybe I shouldn't have called Legolas like this, maybe I should have called him prince. As Legolas came, I observed the second elf. I hadn't met so many women folk so far. There had been a few musicians in Rivendell, and of course my brain wasn't about to forget the breathtakingly beautiful lady I had met once in the gardens. This one was nowhere near as pretty as the black haired one had been, though she was still more beautiful than humans.

"Tauriel." I heard Legolas say before he exchanged words with her in their language.

I had no idea what they were talking about, but one thing was sure, Legolas wasn't happy. His brow furrowed and he snapped at the woman who bowed her head. She quite obviously tried to explain something, or maybe she was making excuses, but Legolas didn't let her. I had stepped back, not wanting to look too much as if I was observing them, though I was. The quiet, thoughtful elf I had been talking with seemed completely transformed. Right now, Legolas was showing another part of himself altogether. He obviously had a commanding position among his people, and he was used to it. In a way, his behaviour reminded me a bit of Dis quiet anger, or Thorin cold fury.

Finally, after a lengthy discussion between the two, Legolas turned to face me. He observed me for a second and I couldn't help but tilt my head and quirk an eyebrow, silently asking him what was going on.

"Amelia." He finally said, his calm voice completely different than the tone he had been using mere moments ago. "There's been a problem and I'm afraid I have to leave you now."

"Nothing major I hope." I said, crossing my arms.

"Just a..." He seemed to hesitate on the words to use. "Small problem with some prisoners."

"Prisoners?" I repeated, actually surprised. "What happened?"

I could only hope that wanted criminals wouldn't come running around here, knowing my luck they would attack me. I felt a chill in my bones at the memories of thugs attacking and kidnapping me. I really, really didn't want a repeat of that to happen. If those people had been imprisoned by the elves, then surely they had done something really bad too. I frowned and paled. I didn't like to think about where those prisoners were. Hopefully they ran in the forest and wouldn't come back out.

"They escaped our jails and Tauriel was unable to find them so far." He glanced towards the woman who was obviously unhappy. "I have to go see the town's master. We'll see each other again."

He looked at me, almost staring, which I found a bit odd. But I shrugged, I had no way of knowing what was going on in his head anyway.

"Sure. It was a pleasure talking with you." I smiled kindly. "Thanks for spending some time with me."

He didn't say anything else, simply bowing his head before leaving. As I was closing the door behind him, I saw the strange glance the woman, Tauriel, sent in my direction. I shrugged again, choosing to ignore it completely.

That woman clearly wasn't of the friendly sort, though to be fair I was quite sure Legolas hadn't been happy with her failure.

As I walked back to sit at my table, I wondered who those prisoners were. Orcs maybe, or goblins. But I couldn't really fathom why they would keep such creatures in prison. For my part I thought that a good goblin was a dead one. If those freaky little creatures hadn't existed, I might still be with the dwarves. Automatically my hand came up to brush the beads of my necklace. It had been so long since I had last seen Nori, I wondered when I would see him again. I missed him. I really did.

Sighing loudly I chastised myself for being so pathetic.

I needed to find something to do in order to push away thoughts of the dwarves.

I didn't feel like going out of town to train, but I could still do some work out in my house. Actually it was a way to improve my ability to move within closed spaces. After all, I could always end up fighting in some sort of buildings. It was this kind of thoughts that had first made me push the furniture against the walls in the spare room I used as storage place. In there, the ceiling was high enough that I was able to dry plants and yet train without hitting the plants at every move.

I grabbed my staff and made my way upstairs.

I doubted that anyone around knew I was doing this kind of training.

That afternoon though, I didn't want to concentrate on battle stances. I had found out, in the past weeks, that I could end up in some sort of meditative state when I had my staff with me and performed simple series of moves repeatedly. I wasn't so much training as I was simply emptying my mind.

I stood motionless in the centre of the room. My staff was in both my hands and I focused on the cool feeling against my fingers.

Slowly I moved in an endless series of stances, changing smoothly from battle stance to defensive ones and back again, and again.

I didn't know for how long I did that. I never paid attention to time during those meditative sessions. All I knew was that the sun was slowly lowering on the horizon and that I would soon need to light candles.

My evenings were always lonely.

I had been used to live with three other persons. There had been noise and warmth back in our home. This place, though it was my house, felt cold. No amount of fire could warm it.

I was mechanically preparing my diner when someone urgently knocked on my door.

Instantly I stopped and strode to the door.

"Bain!" I exclaimed, opening my door more widely. "What's going on?" The look on the boy's face told me that something was happening and he was obviously nervous.

"It's Tilda. She's very sick again." He replied, his eyes barely looking at my face.

"Tilda?" The poor child, she was supposed to be alright now. "What are the symptoms? What happened?"

"She fell in the water." Bain said, following me as I went back inside to grab my satchel. "She's feverish and shaking." He paused before adding as an afterthought. "She's coughing a bit too, and she got a scratch from when she fell."

I swore under my breath. The last thing that this little girl needed was to catch the flu or something worse. Autumn would soon settle, and with the crappy summer there had been here, I feared that winter would be terribly cold. I didn't pause to think about the information Bain just gave me. I had no time to waste.

I grabbed everything I could think might be useful and gestured for Bain to come with me. He didn't need any encouragement to do so. Soon we were rushing through town in a way quite reminiscent of the first time I had met the boy.

He darted away, but this time I didn't actually need to follow his exact path. Laketown was a small town and it hadn't taken me long at all to memorize the layout. I might not know all the smallest passageways or shortcuts like Bain did, but I knew enough and I honestly didn't think that jumping on a passing boat constituted a valid shortcut. Instead I choose to cross the bridge and almost ran into a tall, lanky silhouette.

"Amelia!" Legolas exclaimed, grabbing me by the shoulders.

"Oops, sorry Legolas. A little girl is really sick and I have to be quick." I explained in a hurry, already continuing on the street.

"Do you need any help?" He inquired, striding easily at my pace.

"No, it should be alright. She probably only has a very bad cold. But she had the flu a few weeks ago." I explained and shook my head. "Did you find your prisoners?"

"No." He frowned. "I was coming to tell you about it. I will stay in Laketown for the night at least."

I could feel him staring at me but I wasn't sure why. I chose not to bother asking as I could actually see Bard's house in the distance. Stopping altogether I faced Legolas.

"Do you have a place to stay?" I asked him, feeling that if need be I should offer him to lodge in my spare room.

"The town's master always provides room for passing elves." He replied, looking at me sharply. "I'll be seeing you then."

"Good evening Legolas. Good luck in finding those prisoners."

"Oh, I'll find them. You can be sure of it."

His words sounded quite ominous and I felt a shiver run down my spine. I smiled at him before we both turned away, each going in a separate direction.

I ran up the cracking stairs leading to Bard's house. I didn't have the time to worry about Legolas' words or the tone he used. I didn't have the time to think about the strange feeling that was constricting my chest suddenly. No, I definitely didn't have the time for all those thoughts. I should only be focusing on Tilda. Bain was probably already by his little sister's bed, worrying that this time she wouldn't fight off the illness.

Tilda was so young, it was unfair that she was sick again. I sighed as I finally stopped in front of the wooden door. Life wasn't fair. I knew that already so there was no point in wallowing in sad thoughts.

I took a moment to put some order in my mind. I needed to focus. I had to, for Tilda, Bard, Sigrid and Bain.

Taking a deep breath I opened the door, not even bothering to knock. I stepped in quickly and was already pushing the door back with my foot when two things suddenly registered in my brain.

One, the house was suspiciously noisy for a place where a sick child currently resided.

Two, something was actually attacking me.

My instincts kicked in as I threw my satchel at the shadow and only had the time to step aside and punch the thing as hard as I could. It crashed on the door next to me, but I had already drawn one of my daggers before it could move again. Before my brain could analyze what my eyes were seeing, the cool hard steel of my blade was pressed against someone's neck.

Then only did I realize that the room was oppressively quiet now.

I blinked.

Then I glanced around.

My blood froze in my veins and I suddenly found it hard to breathe.

Oh Mahal…

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><p><strong>AN: Hi everyone! This chapter was a bit later than I thought, but several events I didn't expect happened in my life and prevented me from writing. Nothing major, and hopefully I'll be able to update the next chapter in 3 to 4 weeks (for real this time) and who knows, if I'm lucky I might even be able to be a bit early (though don't expect that too much).  
><strong>

**So, as usual i want to thank you all for reading this story! Huge thanks to those who take the time to review or add this fic to their favourites/followed lists. Knowing people like my work often brightens my day. **

**I hope you liked this chapter, even though not much happened in it, there's still the slow evolution with Legolas and Amelia's relationship. I'm sure you'll all want to know what happens next, though as usual I'm going to have to ask you to be patient. Good news for you is...you won't have to wait for the dwarves to appear much longer. And then... well we'll see.**

**Any way, thanks a lot for everyone's support! See you soon!**


	58. We Meet Again

**Everything belongs to JRRTolkien, except for the OC and weird parts of the plot.**

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><p>I wasn't sure how to react.<p>

For a moment that seemed an eternity, everything was frozen. No one moved. No one talked. No one dared react in any way. This definitely wasn't the way I had pictured this to happen. I had imagined hundreds of ways this could have happened, and that wasn't one.

I realized I was holding my breath when someone finally decided to move. It wasn't who I had expected to talk first either.

"Amelia!" Sigrid exclaimed, going out of her and Tilda's room.

Tilda was just behind her and now I could see Bain and Bard coming from the back of the kitchen.

"Leave her alone." Bard groaned, making his way towards me, frowning deeply. "I told you I asked for a good healer to come. You had no reasons to attack her."

"I wasn't attacking her!" Kili snapped, forcing me to realize he was the one currently threatened by my blade.

My heart was pounding loudly in my chest.

What were the dwarves doing here? Before I could ask that question though, someone else spoke.

"What are you doing here?" Thorin growled angrily at me, his glare scared Tilda and angered Bard.

"I told you, I sent Bain to her. If you'd rather your friends die, then fine by me." Bard intervened, walking between me and the dwarves I could see.

It was kind of him to try and protect me in such a way. Clearly he didn't trust the dwarves much, but then, what were they doing here in his home?

I finally stepped away from Kili, sheathing back my dagger and decided not to meet the dwarves' gazes. I wasn't ready for a confrontation of any kind. Something that Bard had just said had registered in my mind and worried me. A quick glance around easily let me know that many dwarves were in the main room, but several were nowhere to be seen. Around me there were Kili, Thorin, Gloin, Bifur, Dwalin, and Fili. Nori, Dori, Ori, Balin, Oin, Bombur and Bofur were missing as well as Bilbo and Bard's words were worrisome. Immediately I pushed away thoughts of Thorin and focused on Sigrid who was walking in my direction. She seemed uncertain and worried, but I had no way of knowing what worried her. She kept glancing in Thorin's direction, observing him and the other warriors. Had the dwarves scared her? Considering their usual grumpiness, that wouldn't surprise me.

"Why did you bring her here?" Thorin seemed furious as he walked towards Bard. "She has no business in this town. She shouldn't be there."

"I asked for a healer, as you wanted me to." Bard growled, unimpressed by Thorin's reaction.

"I don't want her here." Thorin stubbornly added.

"Then do you want your companions to die?"

I did my best to look anywhere but at Thorin and Bard. My eyes were locked on Sigrid as we both stood behind her father's back. It was odd and saddening to feel protected from the dwarves by a human.

"What's the situation?" I asked my apprentice, purposely ignoring Thorin's angry voice.

"Dad smuggled them in town. Several of them are sick though, and they were all soaked." Sigrid told me, eyeing the dwarves uncertainly but trying her best to do her job.

I glanced around once more, this time paying more attention to Thorin and the others. It was true that the dwarves were dishevelled, missing pieces of clothes and water was pooling at their feet. They looked like they had met with trouble once again during their quest.

"Where are the sick ones?" I managed to say evenly even though my heart was painfully clenched and I felt like throwing up.

It didn't take a genius to guess that most, if not all, the missing dwarves and Bilbo were sick. It freaked me out to think of seeing Nori weakened this way once again, and I didn't really want to see any of the others in such a state either.

"We placed them in the kitchen." Sigrid said, grabbing Tilda's wrist and gesturing for me to follow them. "It's warmer there and there's more space."

"Did you put some water to boil?" I asked as we left the dwarves arguing behind us with Bard.

Bain was near his father, clearly unsure of what to do. Meanwhile Bard was moving to obviously stay between me and Thorin. Clearly the man had decided to protect me and I wasn't about to complain.

"Did you see Amelia?" Tilda whispered then. "They're dwarves. They came from our toilets."

"Tilda!" Sigrid chastised her sister, though I wasn't sure why she did.

The fact that the dwarves had appeared from the toilet though, was something I would try not to forget. This was such an odd piece of information that I would have to ask for clarification later on. When we arrived in the kitchen, which was separated from the entrance by a thin wooden wall, my eyes seemed to immediately fall on Nori.

A myriad of information were gathered in a second. He seemed thinner than before, not emaciated, thank Mahal, but it was obvious that he had lost weight. His hairdo was completely gone. His braids in his beard were so dishevelled and undone, that I could see how long it truly was. He looked tired and worried. He was pale too. I couldn't see at that moment next to whom he was kneeling. Well, I could have seen it, but my eyes seemed to solely focus on Nori and the rest was just an unimportant blur.

Then he looked up and saw me.

My heart missed a beat and I breathed in sharply.

His eyes widened and he obviously startled. His mouth opened and I saw him voicelessly pronounce my name. I didn't move or didn't say a word as he tiredly brought his hand to his eyes, rubbing them then his forehead before he looked once more in my direction. His eyes were bright as he stared at me once more.

In that moment I wanted nothing more than forget about everything else and run to him. My mouth felt dry and my breathing was almost laboured as I longed to be near him, to touch him. I felt a dull ache in my heart and had to force myself to look somewhere else. Even though I wanted to be in Nori's arms, right now I had to concentrate on my friends' illnesses.

I glanced around quickly to assess the situation.

Dori, Balin, Bombur and Bilbo were clearly very sick. Bofur, Oin, Ori and Nori were next to them, currently trying to dry their hair and warm them by placing piles of blankets on them. Right at the moment Ori appeared from behind a pile of blankets, he saw me next to Sigrid and jolted violently.

"Amee?" He half whispered, forcing all the conscious dwarves to realize I was there.

At this moment I looked back at Nori who was still frozen next to his older brother. I locked our gazes and grazed my necklace. Instantly his eyes seemed brighter as he followed the movements of my fingers. The moment was quickly broken by Ori and Bofur who rushed towards me and quickly squished me between them, hugging me tightly.

"Amee!" "Meli!" They exclaimed and I let out a chuckle without even realizing it. Relief and shock were the most obvious emotions I could hear in their voices.

The pain in my chest considerably lessened right then. It didn't take me long to let go of my basket and hug Ori back fiercely. Oh dear Mahal, I had missed them so much. Oin had joined us too, though he simply patted my shoulder and my head as I smiled hesitantly at him.

The sound of a wet cough painfully reminded us that the situation wasn't that happy. I disentangled myself from their arms and looked at the three sick dwarves and the feverishly looking hobbit. Growing all serious again, I grabbed my basket and handed it to Sigrid before I turned to the dwarves.

"What happened?" I made my way to Dori and knelt next to Nori.

I held my breath for a second when our shoulders touched. I could feel the heat from his body for the first time in what felt like an eternity. I ached to turn and sink in his arms. Instead I took his hand in both of mine and squeezed it lightly. In an instant he placed his free hand on top of mine and made the same gesture I just had.

"Well, let me tell you we had quite the adventure." Bofur grinned, though I could tell he was forcing it. Glancing at his brother, worry came back on his face. "Most recently though, we spent quite some time in barrels." Bofur replied with a deep frown, obviously worried for his brother. "The water was really cold and none of us were feeling very well when we came out."

"And after that we had to swim in the cold waters to come in the house." Nori added while his thumb was drawing small circles on my hand. "But they were all already quite sick at that time."

I frowned, unsure of how it made any sense. Until then I had never seen dwarves looking quite so sick. It honestly shocked me. It wasn't that important at the moment though, so I chose to look at Dori. It hurt to see him like this. I had never seen Dori look quite so weak. It was frightening. He was strong. He wasn't supposed to look like this, all feverish and shivering. After squeezing Nori's fingers one last time I let go of him and placed my hand on Dori's forehead.

The old merchant half opened his eyes and I could tell his vision was probably quite blurry right now. Still he seemed able to focus on me for a moment as he let out a small, sad whimper.

"My poor, poor Amelia." He weakly moaned. "All alone. All alone now."

I clenched my jaw while my heart pounded in my chest. I could feel Nori's hand on my shoulder as he softly spoke.

"He's been asking for you for awhile now." It obviously hurt my thief to tell me that and witness his brother's pain.

I swallowed thickly and struggled to focus back on what was currently important. Nori's words were sending my heart in turmoil of feelings and I really didn't have the time to put some order into it right now. Shaking my head slightly, I finally managed to gather my wits and then took hold of Dori's wrist and checked his pulse.

"Has he had any hallucinations?" I looked at Oin, noticing in a corner of my mind how Ori seemed strangely subdued and distant.

"I'm not sure." The old healer shook his head tiredly, reminding me that he was old too and probably really exhausted now. "As Nori said, he's been asking for you since his fever started. He's delirious."

I nodded and then decided to take the lead here. Obviously, Oin was not in the best of shapes either. The old healer was as dishevelled as all the others but I could see that whatever adventure they had, had taken its toll on the old dwarf.

"Alright." I said before standing quickly. "Sigrid, I want you to prepare several pots of boiled water. We'll need to make different infusions, and maybe a poultice for their chests." My young apprentice almost jumped to attention and nodded before hurrying to put more pots of water to heat. I turned to look at Tilda and the young girl was observing the dwarves with rapt attention. "Tilda." I called her to catch her attention. "I want you to go back to your room or at least avoid the kitchen. We wouldn't want you to be sick again."

"But…" She started before biting her lip shyly.

"What is it?" I asked her kindly, though I honestly had no time to waste right now. I knelt to look directly at her and she looked up timidly.

"The angry dwarf is scary." She whispered bashfully.

I frowned. Well, it was true that an angry Thorin wasn't exactly the kind of dwarf you wanted to chat with. I glanced up and saw the other dwarves present in the kitchen looking at us.

"Alright, but you want to know a secret?" She nodded and I smiled. "The angry dwarf will actually never hurt a lovely young girl like you. He's scary, but he's not that bad. But if you're truly afraid, I'm sure that Ori and Oin will be happy to accompany you and protect you." I mock whispered. "And if you ask nicely, maybe Ori will even tell you amazing stories about dwarves."

"Really?" Tilda looked wishfully at me.

"Yes." I confirmed before standing back up and kindly pushing her towards Ori who didn't say a word. "Now, I would like you three to go out of the kitchen. I'll need space and already have more help than necessary."

"I can…" Oin started before I cut in.

"You can sit back there and make sure Thorin doesn't kill anyone." I pushed him before adding. "Sigrid will know how to help and Bofur and Nori are more than enough to help out with whatever I might need them to do." I turned to Ori and quickly kissed his cheek. "Please, take care of Tilda." He seemed startled and frowned, which was odd, but I truly didn't have the time right now to ponder on Ori's behaviour.

He had seemed genuinely glad to see me earlier, but right at that moment, I wondered if all was well between us. Not sparing a second on that particular thought, I pushed all three of them out and finally was able to concentrate on the dwarves left inside.

Bofur was sitting between Bombur and Bilbo, and Nori was still next to Dori, Balin lying on his other side. They both looked tired, but clearly they were healthier than the others. Bofur offered me a kind smile, even though I could see he was worried about Bombur. I sighed and tilted my head a bit.

"Now, what's this story about barrels and water? How long did you all stay in the freezing water? What happened to you all?"

In the following hours I managed, with the help of Sigrid, Bofur and Nori, to dry the sick dwarves, to make sure they were warm and to prepare several batch of different infusions that would hopefully help them heal. I had also prepared another infusion for all the other dwarves. It was probably foul tasting, but I thought it might be necessary to prevent any other illnesses, and I didn't care about the taste at the moment. I had used almost all my reserves of feverfew and Echinacea and would have to crush some more later on. As I worked mostly on the preparation of infusions and a poultice, Sigrid was by my side while Bofur and Nori were using towels to dry their family and friends' hair. As we all worked, Bofur told me tales I had trouble believing.

"You're telling me that Bombur fell into that foul looking river?" I pulled a face.

"Aye." Bofur frowned at the memories. "He was unconscious for awhile after that."

"We had to carry him." Nori added softly and Bofur nodded.

"We were all exhausted and starving." He kept telling me with a grim face. "And of course after that we just had to leave the path."

I cringed as I remembered very well my own experience with the forest. I hadn't lasted long once I left that small path. I shivered as Bofur's description was bringing back memories I wanted to push aside. There were some details I couldn't ignore though.

"And then came the spiders." Bofur said grimly, catching my attention once more. Both Bofur and Nori seemed to shiver at the thought of those spiders and I felt uneasy. Had Legolas not exaggerated then?

Nori, who was apparently paying close attention to me immediately reacted and came closer, taking my hand in his.

"Did you have troubles with them too?" He seemed really worried then and I reacted by stepping slightly closer to him, taking his hand in mine.

Our eyes were locked together as I slowly shook my head. I had to reassure him, I couldn't deal with him being so worried over me.

"No." I squeezed his hand. "No I just saw their webs. I never even caught a glimpse of them."

He instantly sighed with relief while Bofur cleared his throat. Immediately Nori went back to what he had been doing before while Bofur decided to keep on talking.

"Well, we weren't so lucky." He told me. "We all ended up being stung and hung in their webs."

"You were stung by giant spiders?" I said, turning immediately away from the mixtures I was making.

"Aye."

I paled and looked at them in horror.

"How did you all react?" I finally asked shakily, looking at Nori with renewed worry in my heart.

"Dori and Balin were quite weak after we got freed by Bilbo." Nori said.

"And Bombur was already a bit weak from hunger." Bofur added, apparently seeing what I was thinking.

It was probable that the dwarves had been weakened by their trek through the forest. But that had been a long time ago. It shouldn't have weakened them for quite so long. Even if they had badly reacted to the spiders' venom, that shouldn't have lasted, should it? I wasn't an expert in poisons and hadn't been that interested in such topics before.

"Aye, neither of them were feeling well after that." Bofur kept talking with a frown. "But Bilbo wasn't hurt."

Maybe it had something to do with their weakened state, maybe it hadn't. I had no way of being sure. I couldn't perform any real analysis of their blood and couldn't know whether the spiders' venom had a stronger effect on them than the others. There was no point in wasting time over it though, so I turned back to crushing the plants I had and checking over the infusions and poultice I was making.

Sigrid had helped a lot, preparing the infusion and following my instructions carefully. She kept an eye on the various preparations while I helped Nori and Bofur to set makeshift beds with the dry blankets and then placed the dwarves on them. I was hoping that the dwarves' natural healing abilities would help them go through the illness quickly. Bilbo's case was more worrisome as the poor hobbit seemed rather fragile compared to the usually sturdy dwarves.

The four of us had worked mostly in silence for a while and I had been able to focus entirely on the tasks at hand. I had forced my brain to forget about anything else. I didn't want to think about what was going to happen now. There was no way for me to guess anyway, so there was no point in worrying about Thorin or the other dwarves.

Dori's feverish mumbles worried me far more actually. Balin was freezing and I hadn't been able to warm him up so far. His old age could potentially be quite troublesome, but I wasn't really sure if the dwarves' sturdy health would diminish when they grew old. Bilbo was the worst; he was trembling and unconscious, his brow burning with a mean fever. Bombur, in comparison, almost looked healthy, though the round dwarf was currently sickly green and feverish too. The diagnosis didn't take me much time, as it was quite obvious that they all suffered from exhaustion, extreme cold and mild malnutrition. Even Bombur seemed to have lost some weight. The cold was quite clearly caused by their extended time spent in cold water and wet barrels, though I still wasn't sure what they had been doing to end up in such a place, and their exhaustion wasn't surprising all things considered. Bofur also kept on providing me with some more information that I added in my mind to explain why the dwarves could have been quite so weakened.

"Once we got free from those spiders, we ended up in the elves' care." He said with an humourless laugh. "There was barely anything to eat, though we weren't left to starve." He shrugged before adding with a sad looking grin. "And they rarely eat anything other than fruits and salad."

I couldn't help but frown a bit at his words.

In a way I was surprised that the elves had opened their doors to the dwarves. I was even more shocked by the knowledge that the dwarves had remained there for quite so long instead of pushing forward. And why hadn't the elves taken better care of them? It somehow didn't add up in my mind, especially when I thought about Legolas' reaction to the mere mention of dwarves. The only point that seemed logical in that weird story, was that if the dwarves hadn't eaten anything but fruits and vegetables for a month, then it wasn't truly a wonder that they had been weakened. It still didn't explain their trip in barrels, but at this point I decided to focus on my work and Bofur fell silent once more, probably lost in his memories.

Nori hadn't added anything and had glanced worriedly at me before looking down at his brother. It made me frown a bit, wondering once more whether this was all there was to know about this story. Silently I took Nori's hand in mine and tried to convey all my feelings for him through this simple gesture. The small smile he offered me in reply was enough to let me know he would be alright.

Once I had given each of the dwarves two cups of infusions each, I had not much left to do. I had to wait for the poultice I had also prepared to cool down a bit before I could use it. Once applied on the patients' chests, it would hopefully help them breathe a bit better and warm their skin. Maybe some ointment would have been more efficient, but I couldn't be certain. At this point I was experimenting a bit. As we waited, Sigrid proposed to bring the hot beverage to the other dwarves and I told her to give some to Tilda and Bain too. Right after she left with the cups in one basket and the pot of hot infusion, I finally took some time to speak with my two friends. Well, they were more than that, but that was beside the point.

I sighed loudly and sat between Balin and Nori. I gingerly wiped my old guardian's brow and let my fingers trail on his shoulder for a bit. I hated to see him this way. I hated to see all of them this way. I tried to swallow back the lump in my throat and scooted a little bit closer to Nori who immediately brought his left arm around my shoulders.

Not hesitating for a moment longer, I let my head fall on Nori's shoulder and closed my eyes for a second.

"What happened to you? Why did you stay with the elves for so long?"

"How did you arrive here?" Nori asked instead of replying. He looked horribly worried. "Why did you do that? Why did you come here?"

"I wasn't about to stay at Beorn's place." I angrily whispered before remembering that neither Nori nor Bofur deserved my anger. "I didn't want to stay behind. I followed the path in the forest." I started to tell the both of them and I instantly felt them tense.

"Amelia…" Bofur was frowning and was clearly half angry half scared as he looked at me. My own glare forced him to shake his head as he sighed. "Forget it, I'm just glad you got out of that forsaken place."

"Were you hurt? Are you sure you're alright?" Nori whispered, his right hand grabbing mine again.

"I'm fine. The elves found me and escorted me here."

If they hadn't been tense before, now they sure were. Because they both seemed really scared, I quickly told them what had happened to me, though I skipped some details on purpose. To say they weren't pleased with my little adventure would be putting it mildly. But for whatever reason they didn't loudly scream at me. They probably had missed me too and didn't want us to fight right now. It was just after that, that they told me where they had been. It left me speechless for a moment before I whispered horrified.

"You were in prison?" I squeezed Nori's hand tightly, terrifying images of Lunetown's cells crossing my mind. "Why? What did you do? What happened? Why? How?"

"Calm down Mizimul." Nori whispered in my ear as he hugged me. "We're free now."

For a short moment, I closed my eyes, Nori's warm presence calming my heart and soothing my worries away. I couldn't remain quiet for long though, as my brain kicked in and decided to point out to me several details that still didn't add up.

"But, wait." I pushed him away slightly. "If you were imprisoned by the elves, how come you're here now?" I had a growing feeling that I knew exactly the answer to this question.

"We escaped." Nori said before Bofur joined in.

"The elves couldn't catch us. We hid in barrels that Bilbo closed and then threw in the river. It was bitterly cold and quite humid of course, but the elves didn't even think to look at that." Bofur seemed stupidly proud of that fact but I didn't comment. "We spent maybe a whole night and half a day in there before we got out. Bombur, Balin and Dori weren't feeling well at all by then. And it's a wonder Bilbo was still gripping one of the barrels' tightly. Our hobbit was half unconscious by then." The toymaker added.

The whole story was barely believable, though now it didn't seem that surprising for them all to look quite so tired. Bombur's, Balin's and Dori's sicknesses also made more sense. Even dwarves would be weakened after living through so many adventures in such a short span of time. And to think that while I was here, they were in Thranduil's jails.

"The elves..." I started to say before I shook my head and sighed.

"Don't worry Mizimul." Nori whispered in my ear.

"Aye, they won't find us here." Bofur nodded. "We escaped right under their nose."

He was even smiling quite cheekily, seemingly proud of that fact. Clearly, being imprisoned and escaping the prison hadn't deterred Bofur from being his usual cheery and happy self. For my part, I didn't find this to be a funny situation in the least.

"Legolas is already looking for you and he's in this bloody town." I snapped at them.

"Legolas?" They both repeated though their tones were completely different.

Bofur was simply wondering who that Legolas was. Nori though seemed both suspicious and angry and I ended up rolling my eyes before scoffing at him. Now wasn't the time to be jealous.

"Who's that Legolas?" Nori growled, eyes narrowed at me.

"He's an elf and he escorted me here." I replied, purposely avoiding details I didn't feel would be relevant to share right then.

"What?" Nori's frown deepened.

"Lass, I'm not sure..." Bofur seemed worried but I didn't let him continue.

"I'm here, aren't I ?" I glared at him to silence him. "Legolas was even somewhat friendly."

"You're too friendly with those elves." Nori groaned but my glare forced him to shut up.

It didn't stop him from pouting though and I tiredly rubbed my hand over my eyes while Bofur chuckled a bit.

"Well, our Amelia is still so full of surprises." He cheerfully said.

Unwilling to discuss the topic of Legolas right then, I shook my head and stayed silent. Bard chose that moment to step in the kitchen. He immediately looked at me and I could tell he was wondering about my relationship with the dwarves.

"They're all starting to ask Sigrid questions about their friends." He simply said, though I was quite sure that he would want to speak with me alone at some point.

Nodding, I stood up and Nori, Bofur and Bard followed me back to where we found all the other dwarves. They were all currently drinking the infusion that Sigrid was busy distributing for what I guessed to be a second time. I had prepared quite a lot of it. Before I could say anything about my new friend and the dwarves' status as escapees, one dwarf stood up and glowered at me.

Thorin, of course, was the first one to complain about my presence here.

"What are you doing here?" He asked me in a menacing tone.

It took me half a second right then to decide how to deal with him. That split moment was all it took for me to make my mind and steel my resolve.

"I happen to be a healer." I said somewhat dryly. "I came here to heal sick people." I replied calmly.

He growled and took a step towards me, his icy glare turning more threatening.

"You know what I meant. What are you doing in Laketown, Amelia?"

Bard was about to intervene, but I didn't give him the time to do so. I wouldn't be able to avoid Thorin for long anyway.

"None of your business, Thorin." I coldly replied.

I saw his eyes widen before he glared at me once more. I didn't let him talk though and immediately added, pointing at my hair for more emphasis.

"Or did you forget our last encounter? I'm not yours to command anymore."

Thorin was about to bark something when Gloin unexpectedly intervened.

"Enough already!" He said surprisingly calmly. "Amelia, we just wanted to protect you." He stepped towards me and took something out of his pocket. "This quest is so dangerous, it wouldn't have been right for us to drag you into certain danger. You're our dear ward. You're my kin. What would Danà say if I were to bring news of your early demise? Your life will be so short already, why try to shorten it even more?"

As he talked, he kept walking towards me up until the point he was just a step away. My throat was dry and I could barely breathe as I looked at him with painful tears in my eyes. My chest was about to burst with all the emotions I was trying to keep contained. I loved those dwarves. This had never been doubted. But they had abandoned me. They thought me too weak to follow. They had hurt me so terribly after I had put so much effort into defending them every time I could. How could I move past this? How could I forget about their betrayal?

"You abandoned me." I hoarsely managed to say. In the quietness they all heard me though and some of them didn't hide the grimaces they made.

"We didn't..." Kili tried to protest before Fili muttered for him to shut up.

The two brothers glared at each other but my attention was soon caught once more by Gloin who completely ignored the others.

"We tried to protect you. This is what dwarves do." Gloin said calmly before grabbing my hand and placing something on my palm. "Agreed, we sometimes do it in odd ways, but it's still what we do."

I glanced around. Most of the other dwarves were looking away. I was somehow shocked that Gloin would want to have this discussion right here and then. I cleared my throat and tried to forget that others were listening.

"You left me alone." I shook my head, trying to find arguments to prove that I had been right in my anger. "You betrayed me." I whispered, my voice sounding more like that of a little girl than it ever did. "I am not a child for you to protect."

"We'd rather you be alone and alive, than cold in the stone." Oin gruffly voiced his opinion, clearly not caring much about my last comment.

Tears welled up in my eyes and finally rolled on my cheeks. I didn't need to look down to know that the cold, metallic item in my hand was my kinship bead. My heart was about to burst. My thoughts were a mess. I wasn't sure what I should be doing or thinking anymore; the dwarves had indeed abandoned me, they left me behind without even trying to mend the rift between us. They just left. I had been so angry, and even now I still felt that my anger was justified. But I could understand how the dwarves' warped logic would make them act this way in order to protect me. Knowing this didn't help me control the turmoil inside me.

This situation was a bit embarrassing. Besides the fact that this truly was a private conversation, I really didn't enjoy reacting in front of them like a little girl when I was precisely trying to convince them I was an adult. I couldn't really control my feelings right now. I looked around once more. Except for Kili who was observing the scene and Fili who was trying to force his brother to turn away, all the dwarves were looking elsewhere. Even Thorin was now silent and allowing us to have a somewhat private chat. Blinking several times, I focused back on Gloin who was calmly standing right in front of me.

I knew he was honest when he said he only meant to protect me. The only thing I wasn't so sure of, was whether or not I could forgive him and all the others. Just because they had been thinking of my well-being didn't mean that I couldn't be pissed at their behaviour.

But I had missed them so very much.

Never had I felt so much at home, than when I was with the dwarves.

Could I move past this and forgive them?

Did I want to?

"Danà would never forgive me if anything happened to you." Gloin finally said before I couldn't resist anymore and threw myself in his arms. He hugged me tightly, and patted my head as I felt more tears spill.

"You're such a stubborn woman." Oin finally huffed. "You won't even let us do our job properly. You just keep putting yourself in harm's way. How did you expect us to react to that?" As he said those words he walked up to us and pried my hand open before slipping two beads in it. "You're our kin and we protect our kin. Even when they don't want to be protected."

"I can't forgive you all that easily." I finally admitted, somehow ashamed by this, though it was the undeniable truth.

"Why can't you..." Kili once more started to speak, startling me slightly, before Dwalin just grabbed him and forced him to turn around. "What? I'm just...Oy!" I could hear his muffled protest as Dwalin slapped the top of his head and ordered him to keep quiet.

Gloin huffed and ignored Kili completely as he shrugged.

"You wouldn't be one of us if you could."

I was shocked by those words and startled. Looking up, my eyes met Dwalin's and the warrior sighed and shook his head but didn't say another word.

"By Mahal, you're probably as stubborn as Dís, if not more." Thorin finally sighed tiredly before sitting heavily on the nearest bench. He placed his head between his hands and groaned lowly. "What have I done to deserve such females in my life?"

Dwalin snorted but no one dared comment on that. I was still in Gloin's arms and didn't care much about Thorin right now. The king sighed loudly before he looked at me.

"How are they?"

Clearly the topic of my presence here and our previous encounter was put aside for now, though I didn't doubt that the situation would still cause trouble between us. Nothing had been solved after all. I accepted the change in the discussion easily. Suddenly I was exhausted and didn't want to spend hours yelling at any of the dwarves. I took a deep breath and stepped away from Gloin, taking a second to collect myself and wipe the tears away.

"I understand you had not many options when you travelled in those barrels, but it clearly didn't do them any good. Actually, I'm guessing that the whole mess you've been in since you left Beorn hasn't helped them at all. I'm quite sure they were already tired and weakened before your adventure in barrels." I rubbed my forehead a bit and let out a soft sigh. "Bombur is the least sick of them all. With medicine, warmth and proper food, he should be alright." I calmly stated, starting with the better news, though none of them were good per se. "I'm not sure whether or not Dori is hallucinating. If he is, this could be a really bad sign. Right now, I'm trying to bring his fever down. Hopefully it'll help and once he's not so feverish anymore, those bouts of delirium will stop." I swallowed thickly, hating that I couldn't help him more.

The other dwarves were all listening intently. Even the usually noisy Fili and Kili were quiet and serious right now. Bard and Sigrid were standing quietly at the threshold of the girls' room. Bain and Tilda were probably in said room as I couldn't see them anywhere. It was better this way. Though, they could probably hear everything anyway. I took another deep breath before I started the second part of my report. Ori was looking at me desperately from where he stood, next to Bard. None of the dwarf were happy with the news I was bringing.

"Bilbo and Balin are worrying me." I frowned. "Balin is old and I'm not sure how his body will react to the sickness. If he were a man, I'd be extremely worried. He's freezing and feverish, which isn't a good combination. As it is, I'm hoping that the dwarvish health will help. Until now, I had no idea one of you could become so ill." I shook my head, it had truly been a shock to see the dwarves so sick. "Bilbo is the unluckiest of them all. His cough is terrible and I'm afraid it'll turn into pneumonia. It's only the first night though, so right now I can't be sure of anything. I'm worried." I said and shook my head, passing my hand in my hair. "Really worried."

The silence that fell heavily in the room was extremely disturbing. After having missed the dwarves for so long, I could tell that their silence was extremely odd for me. We remained this way for awhile before I decided to breach another difficult topic.

"Where do you plan on staying?" I rather suddenly asked, forcing everyone to look at me once more.

"Here for now." Thorin replied. "But we were hoping to leave soon."

I shook my head decidedly.

"You won't be able to. Even in the best case scenario, Bilbo won't be able to stand before a week or two. Same for Balin and probably Dori too, I guess. It's the first time I see dwarves quite so sick, I'm not sure how fast or slow they'll heal." I commented, feeling that another yelling match will soon start once I said the things I knew.

"You can't stay here for too long though." Bard intervened. "We won't be able to hide you that well, not in the current situation. It'll be too suspicious if we start bringing food for twenty in here."

"Then we'll go into town." Thorin said dismissively, clearly not worried about this specifically. "We can't stay too long anyway, we lost too much time already." He added under his breath.

"You can't go into town." I cut in, trying to stay calm. "Trust me on this. You don't want to be seen in town."

"And why is that?" Dwalin frowned at me.

I wasn't sure what they had told Bard, and even though I liked the man, I couldn't be certain he wouldn't kick them out once he knew my friends were fugitives. Instead of spilling everything here and then I just shrugged and looked right into Thorin's eyes.

"Trust me. Stay hidden for now."

Thorin's eyes narrowed on me. He was obviously pondering on my words. He knew he could trust me, or so I hoped.

"Can't they go to your place?" Bard frowned at me, smart enough to know that something was going on. "You have enough space."

"I'm not sure it'll be a good idea. A lot of people come and go." I shook my head and rubbed my forehead tiredly. "Listen, it's late and I have to go back. It'll be weird if people find out I stayed the night here. I'll come back tomorrow morning."

"You can't stay alone in this place!" Kili exclaimed rather innocently and there was a short silence after his words.

"I've been living alone here for awhile now." I said evenly before I turned towards Sigrid. "I trust you to come get me if anything changes for the worst." I told her before instructing her to give plenty of infusion to drink to the patients if they woke. "And you can trust Oin, he's the one who taught me everything I know about plants." I pointed to the old dwarf before looking at him. "Sigrid is currently my apprentice, she's very thorough and precise. I'm sure she can handle things here for the night."

"You took an apprentice then?" Oin huffed, one of his eyebrows arching high on his brow.

"Yes." I turned to face the others, unsure of what to say. "Goodnight." I muttered finally before glancing in Nori's direction and leaving Bard's house in a hurry.

I was barely down the stairs when I heard the door open and close behind me. I glanced above my shoulder, wondering who was following me outside. It was only mildly surprising to see Bard stepping down to join me.

"Is everything alright?" I asked.

"I should be the one asking that." He huffed, crossing his arms over his chest, he tilted his head a bit and looked at me with concern. "What's going on here? Who are they? How do you know them and why the tension?"

I looked away for a moment. There didn't seem to be anyone around, but I still didn't feel comfortable talking about the dwarves in the open when I knew that what I said could easily be reported to the master. Sighing I finally relented. I wanted to go home, and I knew that Bard could be as stubborn as a dwarf. Besides, I felt as if he deserved to know the truth, or at least part of it.

"You probably guessed I knew them all." I said calmly and he nodded, encouraging me to continue. "Well, some of them are the closest thing I have, had..." I frowned, annoyed at my own uncertainty. "They're family. Or they used to be."

"You're no dwarf." Bard frowned and commented gruffly.

"No, but they saved my life and took me in when I needed it." I told him honestly. "We had an argument, several months back, before I arrived here. I hadn't seen them since. That's why we were shocked to meet and why the situation is a bit tense."

"Are you truly going to be alright with them here?" Bard insisted. "If you don't want to see them..." He started before I interrupted him.

"No!" I almost exclaimed. "I...Bard, you don't need to protect me from them." I smiled tiredly. "I appreciate the gesture, truly, but they wouldn't hurt me. Not intentionally at least. They need me now, and I would never abandon them in a time of need." I added, locking my gaze with Bard's to let him know how serious I was.

After a short moment of silence he nodded slightly.

"Alright. I'll trust you and your judgement then."

"Thank you, I appreciate it."

A few minutes later, I was hurrying in the streets towards my house. Soon enough, my discussion with Bard was almost forgotten as my whole mind was busy whirling with thoughts almost exclusively centred on the dwarves.

This unexpected meeting with them hadn't really changed anything. A lot had been left unsaid and none of us had really acknowledged that the other might be right. Most of the dwarves had kept silent and those who had voiced their opinions clearly hadn't changed their minds about me. This didn't sit well with me at all. I knew that we would have to talk at some point, because I was certain I couldn't and wouldn't go back with them if nothing changed. It was high time they stopped seeing me as a kid they had to protect.

I quickly made my way towards my house, trying to push aside those thoughts. I felt I had to pay attention to the sounds I could hear. I couldn't see or hear anything suspicious but my senses were on edge. The night was cold and no one was out. Oddly enough I felt relieved when I finally unlocked my door and quickly stepped in my house. I closed and locked my door before pressing my back against the wood and sighing loudly.

My thoughts were in a whirlwind.

The dwarves were here.

Some of them were sick.

They were fugitives and Legolas, my newfound friend, wanted to put them back in jail.

The dwarves were here. They were here...

I tried to put some order in all the thoughts and feelings that raged within me, but it was a lost fight until suddenly a thumping noise caught my attention. I looked upwards at the ceiling. Frowning, I wondered whether or not I had imagined this noise. I held my breath for a moment before deciding to go up and investigate myself.

I really didn't need a fight right now, but I removed my cloak and grabbed my daggers before slowly making my way upstairs.

I tried my best not to make any sound and to listen carefully. As I finally reached the last step, I could have sworn that I heard another thumping noise coming directly from my bedroom. All thoughts concerning the dwarves left me as my brain and body focused entirely on the coming fight. I had no doubt in my mind that this intrusion was anything but friendly.

I stopped for a second when I arrived in front of my door, taking a moment to decide on the best course of actions. The room behind was large enough for the intruder to hide in several spots. On the plus side, the corridor was completely dark and I could navigate it only because I knew the place so well. My room on the other end would likely be slightly lit by the moonlight, at least.

I wasn't a great tactician, and I was far from being a warrior. There wasn't much I could come up with, except go in and attack. It didn't sound like a plan at all, but it was the only thing I had. Taking a slow, calming breath I readied myself before I kicked the door, banging it against the room, and ran in, ready for a fight.

I startled when I saw and heard the wooden shutters bang slightly against the windowpane. There was no one in the room. I looked around, even went as far as to look on the other side of the bed. No one could be seen.

Odd.

I was so certain I had heard a noise, but it could have been the shutters.

Feeling stupid, I sheathed my daggers and stood silently in the middle of the room. Then the shutters banged again, forcing my eye to look that way. I jolted violently and muffled a scream in my hand before pressing the other quickly on my chest.

Nori stood there, chuckling lightly and I cursed at him.

"Now, now Mizimul, this isn't really the kind of language a proper lady would use." He looked pleased with himself and I cursed some more.

"Idiot!" I groaned. "You scared me to death."

He didn't say a word but in two quick strides he was standing in front of me. I gasped and looked at him, startled to see him move quite so fast. We didn't touch at all, but I couldn't stop a shiver from running down my spine as I unconsciously licked my lips.

Slowly and wordlessly, he brought a hand to my cheek, the pulp of his fingers lightly skimming over my old scar before his hand dove into my untied hair. He clenched his fist, grabbing a handful of my hair at the base of my skull, though he didn't hurt me, and our gazes locked.

"I missed you Sanmizim." He said hoarsely.

Both my hand shot up and grabbed the collar of his tunic. I slowly pressed my forehead against his, our eyes never looking away.

"I missed you too, my thief." I replied in the same, half broken tone.

In half a second our lips were almost violently pressed together. This kiss was almost painful, expressing how desperate we were to simply be together. I let the heat of the moment carry my hands, shutting my brain off completely. I only had one word ringing in my head again and again. Nori. Nori. Nori.

Nothing mattered but him, but us.

His free hand was painfully digging in my hip, pressing me against him as I hid one of mine in his mane of hair and the second kept him close, still fisting his collar.

The bruising kiss didn't slow down for a long time. It wasn't a battle for dominance. It was just a primal, animalistic need to prove the other was there. A need to be together.

After awhile, the bestial need diminished slowly, leaving behind the sweet desire to be close to one another. The tenderness with which he touched me, caressed me, whispered my name...it became too much and my heart throbbed painfully as tears pooled in my eyes.

"Mizimul?" He worriedly stepped away. "I'm sorry." He said hastily. "I didn't want to hurt you. Please, forgi..."

I shut him up with yet another heated kiss before I pecked his lips more tenderly.

"I love you so much." I said brokenly. "So, so much." I kissed him again, almost desperately. "Please, Nori, don't disappear from my life ever again."

He looked startled for a moment before he gingerly gathered me in his arms, pressing soft kisses against my temple, cheek, jaw and neck.

"I won't Mizimul." He kissed the place where my neck and shoulder met and I shivered against him. "I couldn't." He left a burning trail of kisses on my throat. "You're my One." He whispered in my ear before he kissed me once more. He didn't even give me the time to question his odd expression.

After that we both lost tracks of what was happening up until the point when we heavily fell on my bed. Then, there was a short pause before Nori started to hastily stand back up. My hands stopped his escape and forced him to lean back down and kiss me again. His hand somehow snuck under my tunic, touched my bare skin and I pressed harder against him, letting out a breathy moan while he was kissing and licking my throat. I had never sounded so wanton, but I didn't care. My brain was filled with thoughts of Nori, of how his hands were burning my skin, sending electricity along my spine with each touch, each kiss, each caress.

He abruptly stopped to my great displeasure when his lips met the leather of my necklace.

I opened my eyes, realizing only then that they had been closed, and observed him. His eyes were wide open as he stared at the necklace.

"Yours are the only beads I would never throw away." I whispered, feeling suddenly shy.

He was shaking a bit when he grazed the wooden and stone beads of the necklace.

"Sanmizim." He breathed out, looking at me with hope and disbelief in his eyes.

"Whatever happens, I'm yours." I cradled his face in my hands before kissing him softly.

"Id-âlnas." He repeated between kisses and at that moment I couldn't care less what it meant.

Rather suddenly, Nori's hands were caressing my bare skin again, though this time it felt more pressing, more urgent. I was trying my best to muffle my moans as his fingers and lips trailed over my sensitive skin. Soon though, it wasn't enough anymore and I decided to retaliate. After I helped him out of his tunic and found myself in a similar state of clothing, we both stopped for a second, looking at each other. His dark pupils looked at me hungrily and I felt myself blush, though a happy grin tugged my lips upwards.

"Amelia..." Nori softly murmured as I kissed his neck and caressed his muscled chest.

He seemed to hesitate before he moved to the side and lied on his back. I couldn't help myself and had to touch him though. Soon my hands were caressing his muscled chest, my lips kissing the numerous scars, and couldn't help but grin when I saw that his fists were clenching the sheets.

"Mizimul..." He groaned, his eyes closed.

"I love you Nori." I replied between two kisses, while one of my hands caressed his beard and the other kept making circles on his torso.

Hearing those words he opened his eyes.

We exchanged a glance and didn't need to talk anymore. There was no more doubt between us.

I smiled as he softly pushed me on my back and swiftly placed one of his legs between mine. His arms were on each side of my head when he leant to kiss me. I kept caressing his back while he slowly moved his mouth from mine to my throat, then my breasts and then...

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><p>I blinked and slowly gained back awareness. The sweet ache I still felt was pure bliss, especially when it brought back memories of the time I had just spent with Nori.<p>

I couldn't help the huge smile that forced itself on my face.

Nori's strong arms were holding me close to his chest in a position actually quite similar to one we had once been stuck in, back in his room a lifetime ago. This time though there was no shock or worries when I opened my eyes. I smiled and let my hands trail over his skin, revelling in the small shiver I elicited. I playfully observed the reaction that my light ministrations were creating. When my fingers lingered on his thigh, he groaned and pressed against me.

"Tease."

I chuckled at the muttered word before squeaking unflatteringly when he decided to let his own fingers trail on my skin. Turning the game back against me was obviously something he was good at and greatly enjoyed.

After awhile, once I had caught back my breath, I chuckled lightly and looked at the dishevelled yet obviously happy and contented man who was lying next to me. I was playing with his beard when a thought suddenly struck me.

"Nori?" I called him and waited for his hum before continuing. "Could you show me how to braid your beard? I..." I hesitated and felt a terrible blush spread on my cheeks. "I'd like to help you braid it again."

He froze next to me and I wondered for a brief moment whether or not I had said something I shouldn't have. I was just about to apologize when he placed a finger under my chin and forced me to look at him.

His eyes were shining and I smiled. He looked so happy as he nodded. I beamed at him and couldn't help but lean forward to press a light kiss on his lips.

"Wait, I'll light a candle." I winced slightly when I moved, but the ache faded away quickly.

"Amelia?"

"I'm alright, just give me a second." I replied, ignoring the concern in his voice while I grabbed a candle and tried my best to alight it.

It actually took me so long that Nori had to help, chuckling lightly as he did so.

"We really have to work on that." He commented derisively.

Soon enough we were sitting in the middle of my bed, facing each other. It crossed my mind then that maybe I should have felt embarrassed at being naked in front of him, but oddly enough I wasn't. It felt normal. As Nori slowly started to braid a part of his beard though, I quickly focused on other thoughts.

Neither of us spoke as I gingerly imitated his movements and started to braid another part of his beard. From time to time he would show me what to do more precisely, whispering advises.

Rather suddenly, it struck me that I finally understood the meaning this could have for dwarves. Helping Nori with his braids made me feel peaceful and as I concentrated on the neat braids, I tried to pour all my feelings for him in the quiet moment. It almost felt as if we were in a bubble of our own. The rest of the world had faded away. Braiding his beard with him was something that belonged to the two of us. No amount of words could express the deep feelings I felt at that moment.

After awhile, once his beard was once again intricately braided in its usual style, we looked at each other, both happy and smiling.

"Will you let me braid your hair?" He asked in a low tone.

I simply smiled in reply.

"Will you use that bead?" I pointed at my necklace.

He frowned for a second and reality crushed on me again. Abruptly, thoughts of our previous discussions on this topic came back to my mind. I sighed sadly and finally shook my head.

"It wouldn't be wise, right?" I murmured.

"I'm sick of being wise." He replied, his right hand caressing my cheek.

It brought a small, slightly sad smile on my lips. For a second I wanted to tell him to just braid my hair and shout to all the dwarves around that we were together, no matter what they thought of it. But then I remembered how the situation truly was currently and decided that we needed to be a little more patient, if only for a short while.

"How about you use that bead, but braid the hair at the base of my skull?" I offered the compromise. The braid would be almost entirely unnoticeable under all my hair.

He seemed to hesitate.

"I wish things were different."He muttered obviously annoyed.

"When has my life, or yours, been uncomplicated?" I shrugged, feeling entirely too peaceful to be truly annoyed right now.

It did make him smile. He kissed me lightly before nodding seriously.

"Please, turn and hold your hair up." He simply said and I complied readily.

He started by untying my necklace and he took the last bead he gave me from it. He observed it for a moment before he asked me to hold it too while he started to braid my long hair. As he reached the middle of the braid, he stringed the bead on it before swiftly finishing and tying the end with a small leather cord I handed him. Then he helped me put my necklace back on before he engulfed me in his arms.

"Mizimul." He whispered lovingly in my ear, making me hum in delight.

Neither of us wanted to sleep and we simply stayed like this, with him holding me tight, for quite awhile. After some time he softly asked me questions about my life here. It was like we were back in Thorin's Halls, when I would tell him about my previous world in the quiet of the night. I didn't hesitate to reply. I told him about my arrival here, about the master and Alfrid, about the day Sigrid asked to be my apprentice and about Tilda, Bard and Bain. I told him about the people here, how they were and how they had started to accept me slowly. I did refrain to speak about the tentative friendship I was building with Legolas. Clearly the topic of the elves was a sore one, especially after the month spent in their cells.

Once I had nothing else to say, I asked him about what had happened to them.

He held me tighter before he grudgingly told me about the forest, how half the dwarves were angry at the others for leaving me behind, and how the forest had seemed to poison their minds more, forcing them to snap at each other. He didn't detail this much, but after that he told me about how Bombur had fallen in the black waters and had consequently fallen asleep. Clearly they had spent a lot more time than me wandering in the forest before hunger made them leave the path. I shivered when he told me about the huge spiders and felt anger build up inside me when he spoke of how the elves had treated them. They had all been thrown in separate cells, and had been left there to die if not for Bilbo's help. At least they had been fed, if not much and between their time in the forest and the elves' hospitality, it was no wonder they had all lost some weight.

Finally he revealed how Bilbo had planned their escape and why they ended up stuck in barrels and finally met Bard when he came to retrieve the empty barrels.

"I thought you were a dream." Nori whispered against my hair, speaking of the moment he had seen me in Bard's home. "All this time I thought you were safe in Beorn's home."

"I couldn't stay there." I told him sadly. "I really appreciated Beorn's kindness, but I was so angry, so hurt." I shook my head lightly. "I still am." I admitted before quickly adding. "I get it. I understand that they wanted to protect me somehow, but Thorin and the others just left me behind as if I was nothing more than a useless tool. They have to understand that I'm not just a little lost girl. Maybe I was when I first came here, but I'm not like that anymore."

"It hurt them too." Nori confessed sadly. "Dori was so worried for you, Gloin was grumpier than ever and Oin spoke even less than usual. Thorin thought it was for the best. He probably thought that he wouldn't want Dís to follow him on such a dangerous quest, so why would he ask you?" He squeezed me tightly before he finally added. "When you took your beads away..." His voice broke a bit. "Mahal, Amelia I beg you, never do it ever again."

"I'd never remove your beads Nori, I swear." I hoarsely swore.

He shook his head before pressing his head against mine.

"Amelia, I'm certain that in the coming days the others will wait eagerly for you to ask your braids back. That's why Gloin and Oin gave you the beads back. You should have seen them when they picked them up. They immediately braided them in their own hair."

I felt tears spill on my cheeks at the thought. I couldn't talk right then. I knew what that gesture meant. It was their way to assure they wouldn't lose the beads. But more importantly, it was the way dwarves showed respect for their lost family. They would have mourned for me as if I was dead.

"Please." Nori begged softly. "Even Thorin was at a loss. Fili is the one who kept your ward bead, and Kili kept your battle one. And Dori..."

"I promise." I managed to breathe out. "I promise I won't do this again Nori."

I honestly didn't want to hear how my reaction had affected Dori. Maybe I was trying to hide from the truth, but denial was something I did fairly well. Clearly the dwarves had hurt as much as I had.

At that moment I took a decision.

I could be as stubborn as I wanted, but I had to be honest with myself. I had told myself during those past weeks that I would do my best so that the dwarves would ask me to come back. Well, they had. Gloin and Oin had given me the beads I had removed from my hair and I was now the one who had to choose. Either I accepted those beads or not. If I accepted them, then it meant I would be once more one of them. If I refused them, I would have no choice but to stay here with the men folks. It wasn't a difficult decision to make. Actually, I had made that decision awhile ago already.

"I will ask Gloin and Oin to braid my hair tomorrow." I finally said, breaking the silence that had fallen on us. "But it doesn't mean I forgive them." I added.

Nori smiled and nodded.

"I wouldn't ask you to, not so soon." He kissed my temple and then smirked cheekily. "Make them work for it Mizimul."

"Cheeky thief." I laughed happily before he kissed me once more.

"I'll have to go back soon." Nori suddenly whispered, frowning at the window.

It made me frown too, though I then thought about a question I had meant to ask him.

"How did you know where I lived? I didn't see or hear anyone following me."

"I was on the roofs." He shrugged before adding casually. "By the way, you really should close those shutters better. Anyone could enter your house. It's painfully easy to get in from the nearby roof."

"I know." I rolled my eyes, standing up and gathering my clothes and his. "It's not as if there are so many thieves around though." I mock glared at him before adding. "And not everyone is rude enough to jump in like you did."

"You'd be surprised." He muttered, grabbing the clothes I was handing him, he was about to add something when his stomach growled.

"Come down, I'll make you some breakfast." I smiled at him. "You've got to put some meat on your bones, or else I'll soon mistake you for an elf."

"Oy!" He loudly complained as I laughed heartily.

"My poor little dwarf, all skinny and famished." I teased him good-heartedly.

"I am going to enjoy making you regret those words." He smirked at me, his eyes shining with mischief.

"Oh, I'm counting on it, thief." I laughed. "Come, I'll show you the house."

A few minutes later, once we had both dressed, I quickly showed Nori around. He didn't say much, looking sharply around and clearly gauging whether or not men had treated me well by letting me use this place.

He didn't say a word though, so I had no way of knowing what he thought.

Once we arrived in the kitchen, he wordlessly helped me light the fire, before giving me a hand as we cooked some early breakfast. It felt so homey right then that I couldn't help but smile. It was so right for the two of us to be like this, together, and I couldn't help but wonder how things would turn out to be from now on.

I didn't want to ponder on our future too much though, so I let those thoughts go. Instead I concentrated on cooking and preparing a king's breakfast for the two of us. Lucky for me, people paid me with food products more often than not. Soon enough we were sitting at the table with an array of dishes in front of us. We had bread and cheese, of course, but I had also cooked some fishes with some vegetables and eggs. I also had some salted ham and dried sausage.

We ate companionably before I grabbed a basket and placed the leftover ham, cheese, bread and sausage in it.

"You can take that back. It's not much, but well... tell Bard that I'll try to go buy some more at the market before I come later this morning."

He nodded, a deep frown on his face.

"Is Dori going to be alright? And the others?" He asked, concern easy to discern in his tone.

I sighed, reminded of the dire situation.

"I'm not sure. I hope so." I swallowed thickly, not wanting to think about the worst case scenario. "I'll do my best. Dori is strong. If his fever goes down, he should be fine. Same goes for Balin. I'm honestly not..." I was about to continue when someone knocked at my door.

Nori frowned and glanced at me. It wasn't hard for him to realize that this was an unusual occurrence. Well, people did often come here of course, but the sun wasn't even starting to rise yet. I gestured for Nori to go back upstairs as the person outside knocked again.

'Go.' I mouthed at him, before reassuring him with a smile.

He had barely disappeared in the stairs when I unlocked my door and opened it.

My heart skipped a beat at the sight outside.

This could potentially end very poorly.

"Legolas, good morning." I greeted, forcing a smile on my lips while my thoughts were all focused on Nori. "Is there anything I can help you with?"

I silently begged Mahal to help me out. I really didn't need Legolas to find out that one of his fugitives was currently under my roof.

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><p><strong>AN: Thanks everyone for your support! It's amazing to see that people keep adding this story to their alerts or favorites. And I really want to thank all the kind reviewers! You know it, I know it, everyone knows it; reviews are always helpful and welcome, so a BIG thank you to all of you who takes the time to leave a message :)**

**I truly hope you enjoyed this chapter :) I had planned for Nori and Amelia's reunion to be just like that for quite awhile. I hope you weren't disappointed. Let me know what you thought of the dwarves too! **

**I know I was late for this chapter, but RL just messed up my schedule completely. Nothing major, just lots of minor stuff that took my time away from the story. Anyway, I just want to give you a fair warning, I'm currently a bit stuck further in the story. I just have reached a point where I have to take a decision for the main plot line...and I just haven't been able to decide what to do. So this might mean that the update schedule isn't likely to speed up in the coming months. I do plan on updating in january though. So to give myself a deadline, I'll say around the 14th of january. **

**Until then! **


	59. Of Beads and Braids

**Everything belongs to Tolkien, except the OC and weird parts of the plot**

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><p>"I saw some light and was wondering what could be keeping you awake at such a time." Legolas calmly said, walking in my kitchen.<p>

I couldn't help but glance at the stairs, hoping that Nori had left or would keep quiet at least, before I followed Legolas.

"I just couldn't sleep." I replied honestly before looking at the two empty plates on the table.

"Is someone else here?" Legolas looked at me, one eyebrow raised. "I wouldn't want to disturb you."

My heart skipped a beat.

"No, it's..." I blushed terribly and shook my head. "I came back late yesterday and I didn't clean my plate." I laughed embarrassedly before quickly cleaning the dishes away. "I'm not usually so messy." I started to babble. "But Tilda's really sick and I had a lot on my mind so, well... now you've witnessed my poor housekeeping skills."

Legolas observed me for a second before his lips quirked ever so slightly upwards.

"Do not worry about it. I was the one to come unannounced." He bowed his head slightly. "I apologize for the inconvenience."

"Please, don't." I shook my head before clearing my throat. "Can I offer you some breakfast? I have some vegetables and fruits. If you want I can cook some eggs too."

Even though Nori was probably hiding somewhere in the house, I couldn't just kick Legolas out. He would find it strange and be curious about it. At least if he were a dwarf he would just keep annoying me until I told him why my behaviour suddenly changed. I couldn't take the risk. I had to behave as normally as possible.

"There's no need, but I thank you for the thought." He said calmly. "I was simply on my way back to Mirkwood and wanted to bid you farewell when I saw you were awake."

"It's really kind of you." I smiled genuinely. "What about your prisoners?" I couldn't help but ask. "Did you find them?"

"Not yet." He frowned a bit. "Tauriel and I will just try and find their trail in the forest. I'll probably come back in the next couple of days though."

I nodded, secretly relieved to hear that.

"Well, I hope you'll be alright then."

"Don't worry, I will find them soon enough." He shrugged before bowing his head once more. "Well, I will come and visit you again Amelia. Our discussions were most interesting."

"I hope to see you soon, Legolas." I smiled at him. "I truly enjoyed our talks."

After he left, I closed back the door and waited for a full minute to pass before I rushed upstairs. I wasn't really surprised when I didn't find Nori anywhere. Clearly he had no trouble sneaking away when Legolas was there. But if my two daggers obviously placed in the middle of my bed were any indication, I would say that Nori wasn't too pleased and wanted me to keep my weapons on me at all times.

I sighed and shook my head.

I was exhausted now, but the sun would rise soon enough. Instead of trying to catch some sleep, I decided to pour myself a hot bath before I had to go back to Bard's house. Even though I had a bathtub, I hadn't used it yet to take a real, hot bath. Humans hadn't apparently understood the usefulness of pipes yet and I actually had to warm pots of water on my stove and then bring them upstairs and pour them in the tub. It was a pain and I usually just poured three pots and that was it. Today though I went as far as pouring eight of them and could actually enjoy a reasonably warm bath that soothed my aching muscles.

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><p>The sky was still dark when I made my way through the still empty streets of Laketown. Mist hadn't risen yet and the air was crisp, as it usually was, while I quickly strode in the market's direction. Even though the sun was still low in the horizon, I knew that several merchants would already be busy filling their stands with their products and I needed to buy some plants. I hadn't realized until now that it could be so complicated to obtain them. Soon after I had started my small activity here I had met with a few merchants who now knew what I was looking for and where usually kind, or rather smart enough to bring along what I might need if they found it.<p>

It didn't take me too long to find what I wanted to buy, though it wasn't as much as I had hoped. When I said so to Irma, one of the ladies' I usually bought plants from, she shook her head slightly.

"This year's bad. Autumn has barely started and the ice is already thick in some places." She looked resigned as she added. "We'll all have a hard time this winter."

"You never know." I replied, trying to sound hopeful though I knew people here weren't of the merry or hopeful kind. "Maybe spring will come early next year."

Irma shrugged, accepting the few coins I handed her and turned away.

"Let's hope so." She shrugged. "But I don't believe in our luck anymore."

I clenched my jaw. It was hard to see her looking so defeated. It was strange for me to realize how this behaviour seemed different from the dwarves' one. It might not have been fair of me to compare the two races, but I couldn't help myself. People in this town had a harsh and hard life. So did the dwarves back in Thorin's Halls. But whereas the dwarves worked hard and tried their best to stay cheerful, it sometimes felt that the men had given up. They didn't fight. I couldn't understand why no one actively complained about the master and his goons. I couldn't understand why they didn't try to find solutions and just seemed to accept their problems as fate.

I was brought out of my musing as I knocked lightly on Bard's door. I didn't wait before I entered and wasn't surprised to see several dwarves ready to attack. Though really, I never thought I would ever see Dwalin threatening to attack me with a frying pan before. It took me a few seconds to swallow back the laugh that wanted to bubble out of me.

"Amelia." Thorin greeted me.

There was no emotion behind this tone. I couldn't be sure what he thought. Ignoring him wouldn't help me in the long run, so I nodded at him.

"Thorin" I greeted him before glancing around. "How are the patients?"

"Patients?" Kili came out and looked at me in an odd way. "That's a cold way to call them, don't you think?"

There was a short moment of utter silence and I felt my heart clench painfully in my chest. Still, I didn't allow my feelings to show on my face.

"I'm here as a healer Kili." I replied calmly.

"So what?" He retorted, now growing a bit angry. "You've always been our healer Amelia, or have you forgotten?"

Fili elbowed his brother and glared at him. The other dwarves who were here didn't say a word. I stood perfectly still while Fili was obviously trying to get his brother out of the way.

"What?" Kili groaned at his brother.

"Just shut it." Fili muttered.

"She's talking about Dori and Balin! And Bombur and Bilbo are her friends too!" Kili complained loudly. "Doesn't it bother you to hear her use those words to talk about her friends? Her guardians?"

"And didn't it bother you to leave without so much as a goodbye at Beorn's?" I coldly cut in.

"It's..." Kili deflated before Fili intervened.

"Brother. Just leave it." Fili wasn't looking at me as he spoke. "We all have much to discuss, but now isn't the time. Right Amelia?" As he turned to face me I could see a mixture of anxiety and hope in his eyes.

"Right." I finally managed to say. "We'll discuss later."

The air seemed heavy with tension. No one spoke or moved for a while. Thankfully, Sigrid chose that moment to pop out of the kitchen, Oin behind her.

"Amelia!" She exclaimed with a small smile. "I already put water to boil and was just about to start the preparation for an infusion."

Immediately I focused on my apprentice and strode towards her, ignoring the others. I greeted Oin and looked up at Sigrid.

"How are they?" I repeated my earlier question.

"Bombur is much better." Oin gruffly replied. "Still feverish but he's conscious."

I smiled at the news and followed my old mentor into the kitchen where Bombur was indeed conscious. The round dwarf sat on his cot and was grimly eating some broth.

"I'm telling you I can stomach more." He whined at Bofur who was smiling kindly at him, Bifur not far behind.

"The lass said you should only eat that." Bofur kindly chastised Bombur.

I glanced at Sigrid who blushed a bit.

"When Tilda was sick, you said to only give her broth at first." She whispered at me and I smiled.

I nodded and looked back at the grumpy chef.

"I didn't know you'd make such a bad patient Bombur." I told him loudly, startling him a bit.

"Amelia!"

I handed the large basket I was still carrying to Sigrid and removed my cloak before I went to kneel near Bombur. He was smiling happily while Bofur quickly told him what had happened the day before. Meanwhile I quietly placed a hand on his forehead to check his temperature. I didn't try to hide my relief when I realized that he was better. At least one of them would be alright soon enough. After that, I repeated to Bombur that he wouldn't have anything but broth and soup to eat that day. The chef begrudgingly accepted this as a fact and didn't try to complain as I stood back up to check on Balin, Dori and Bilbo.

I was leaning over Balin when Nori and Ori came in.

"How are they?" Ori asked in a small voice.

I didn't reply at first. It wasn't an easy question and I didn't have any particularly good news to share. Dori wasn't mumbling anymore, but I couldn't be certain this was a good sign. Bilbo's cough was just as bad as it had been and I didn't expect any incredible change to occur overnight. Balin's fever seemed to have gone down though, so I could only hope he would be getting better. Still, I couldn't be actually sure that his fever was down. There was no way to adequately measure it here and I wasn't about to fool myself. It was possible that nothing had changed.

"I can't answer to that question Ori, I'm sorry." I softly told him.

"It's alright." He replied in a murmur, looking down.

Nori frowned and placed a hand on his youngest brother's shoulder, but this didn't seem to really cheer him up. I stood up and didn't hesitate to hug Ori tightly. He seemed to freeze for an instant. I had hugged him often enough to find it odd when he didn't hug me back at first. I was just about to step back when I finally felt his arm around my waist. I was relieved when he hugged me tightly, though I knew something wasn't quite right. Over his shoulders I exchanged a worried glance with Nori. The two of us were obviously feeling the same way.

The relative calm of the house was suddenly broken by grumbles and complains coming from the other room. Frowning, I stepped back from Ori's hug and looked around. Bofur, Bifur, Bombur, Nori and Ori all looked back at me with similar frowns. None of us knew what was going on. Not wasting any time, we went to investigate, except Bombur who remained behind with a strict order to rest.

When we arrived in the main room, we saw that the other dwarves were complaining loudly while Bard was starting to look annoyed too.

"What's going on?" Bofur asked, making his way to Dwalin's side.

Ori, Nori and I remained slightly apart. We were standing at the kitchen's threshold, looking at our friends who were gathered in a loose circle in the main room.

"Look at what he calls weapons!" Gloin spat, throwing some heavy item at Bofur.

Bifur intercepted the large item that appeared to be some sort of harpoon and started to examine it. As I looked down, I could see quite an amount of similar tools on the floor. The warriors were grabbing them, before throwing them back there.

"You lost your weapons?" I quietly turned toward Nori.

He frowned deeply and nodded.

"The elves." He said bitterly. "They took almost everything we had."

"Almost?" I quirked an eyebrow at him and he winked at me cheekily.

"I wasn't about to tell them were all my daggers were hidden." His smirk was back as he said that.

I smiled at him, oddly feeling proud that my sneaky thief managed to keep weapons hidden from his jailors. It struck me suddenly that I might be completely biased when it came to him, but well, I didn't really care. Ori's startled reply to Nori's comment brought me out of my thoughts though.

"What? You still had weapons?" Ori was whispering furiously, obviously trying not to be heard by the other dwarves. "Why didn't you help us escape sooner?"

"What good would it have done?" Nori frowned and murmured back at his youngest brother. "We'd have gotten out of the cell and then what? I didn't know the layout of the elves' citadel. Alone I might have been able to escape their notice, but not with all of us."

Well, to be fair, this was quite logical. There would have been no point in escaping only to get lost and caught again.

"Still…" Ori pouted, obviously unhappy with his brother's logic.

"If I had gotten us out only to be taken again, then I wouldn't have been able to hide my daggers much longer either." Nori sighed.

"Well, there's no use discussing this now." I intervened, glancing around nervously and feeling glad that none of the others had heard this discussion. "What's done is done, and you're all free now."

Nori shrugged and Ori nodded, albeit slightly reluctantly. The three of us looked back at the dwarves. During our short private discussion, they had actually decided to try and steal weapons from the master. Now, I didn't mind the fact that they wanted to steal something from that fat idiot, but really, it didn't seem like a wise plan. Especially with Legolas looking for them. I was quite certain he had told the master about their prisoners and from what I knew of him, the master wouldn't pass on the chance to do something for Thranduil. It just wasn't a good idea to let the dwarves walk around freely in town.

I was actually pondering whether or not I should say anything, but in the end decided against it.

As I had reminded Thorin, I wasn't a part of their company anymore. I wasn't their ward and they had no reason to listen to me, except when it came to healing them. Had I opened my mouth to let them know my thoughts, Thorin would have been well within his rights to tell me to get lost. I chose to let them do whatever they wanted, and resigned to having to help them out whichever mess they ended in later on.

I left the house around midday. I still had to go to my own house and make sure no one else was looking for me. I used the time alone to gather my thoughts and put them into some sort of order.

It allowed me to think back on my life here and put everything into perspective.

At first, when I arrived in this world, I had been lost. I snorted when I thought back on it. Lost didn't seem like a strong enough word to describe the helplessness I had felt at the time. Dori, Nori and Ori had appeared to be my only viable option of survival. In a way I had clung to them quite desperately. It was no wonders really that the dwarves sometimes treated me like a lost little girl. It was what I had been then. It was how I had behaved. To this day I didn't feel ashamed in the least by my behaviour. I was quite sure that no one would take such radical changes in stride.

It had taken me quite a long time to adapt to this world. And I had tried so hard to fit in with the people I had come to love so profoundly. They were my family in anything but blood. I had tried to do everything they told me to. I had done my best to be useful and not to be a hindrance to them. I had tried to learn how to be exactly like them, to fit in their society and somehow, along the way, I had lost sight of who I was and wanted to be.

Maybe my little stunt in Beorn's house had been more useful than I thought. Maybe it wasn't only some childish way to reject Thorin's orders and throw them back in his face. Now that I could calmly think about it all, I could only admit that in some odd ways, this forced separation had been good for me.

It had shown me I could survive on my own.

I wasn't a lost puppy that needed to be taken care of.

I could live in this world.

I had a trade and could be considered a master among men. I even had an apprentice now. I was a master healer and I was proud of it.

Smiling softly, I took out the bead that Oin and Gloin had given me back the day before. I let the rather small piece of metal roll between my fingers. The runes on its side were familiar. I had often let my fingers trail over it before. I knew what they meant. But maybe until now I hadn't appreciated it truly. Or they hadn't.

They only had seen me as that lost little girl, well, probably.

Now though, they couldn't have been making the same mistake.

To me, this bead was taking a whole new meaning. It meant they saw me; if not as an equal, at least as someone important to them, as kin. They recognized me for who I was, a human healer whom they found worthy of being their kin.

I smiled.

Maybe I was reading too much into it, but it didn't feel that I was.

Later that day, when I went back to Bard's house, I first checked on the sick before I went to Oin and Gloin and asked to talk to them privately. Some of the other dwarves looked at us oddly and curiously, but Oin and Gloin simply nodded and followed me back to the kitchen. The sick dwarves were all asleep and I hadn't lost any time in kicking Bofur out.

The three of us sat at the small table by the small window. We remained silent for a while until I took the bead out of my pocket and placed it on the table.

"Have you taken a decision then?" Gloin huffed guardedly. "What will it be lass?"

I smiled a bit, recognizing Gloin's impatience for what it was. The dwarf felt probably as anxious as I did. This was only another sign that I was making the right choice.

"You gave me this bead awhile ago." I said, swallowing back a lump that was forming in my throat. "And I know I haven't taken good care of it. So why are you trusting me again?" I felt that I had to ask, I couldn't assume things anymore. Besides, it would also show them that I was truly serious about this. I didn't want them to believe I was taking this honour lightly.

Oin pursed his lips and frowned. Gloin had the exact same expression on his face and it struck me that those two really looked alike right then.

"That day, we weren't able to explain to you what we did." Gloin grumbled finally.

"I reacted like a child." I admitted calmly, though a small blush was heating my cheeks.

"You felt abandoned." Oin muttered. "It wasn't what we wanted. A betrayed dwarf would react badly too."

"I'm not a dwarf." I softly said. "And I would never be one." I added a bit more strongly. "I will not always comply with what you want, such isn't my nature. I'm not a child to be ordered around either, even if it is by my kin. Do not treat me like a child simply because I am not as old as you all." I had spoken a bit more loudly without really meaning to. Oin and Gloin were paying attention to my words, obviously thinking about my words.

Gloin opened his mouth to reply, but another voice intervened before he could.

"You are more like a dwarf than you think." A weak sounding voice said before coughing lightly.

"Balin!" I exclaimed, jumping to my feet and rushing to his side.

"What…" He coughed before starting again. "What in Mahal's name are you doing here?" He asked weakly, clearly exhausted.

"It's a long story." I replied as I hastily checked his fever and pressed my fingers on his pulse to make sure it was strong.

As it often was the case when I actually needed it, I could only miss the technology I had left behind in my previous world. It was annoying to say the least, that I could only help so much when my loved ones were sick.

"Are you alright?" Balin wheezed, clearly still feverish and weak.

"I should be the one worrying right now." I muttered under my breath, though I knew perfectly well that they all heard. "I'm fine Balin. I'm just worried about you and the others."

He nodded and closed his eyes. This was enough to let me know he would be out of it soon enough. Clearly our voices had woken him, but he was still too weak and too ill to really awoken. I could bet that he wouldn't remember this little discussion, or if he did, it would be hazy at best and he would most likely think of it as a dream of sort.

I did manage to give him some herbal tea before he completely dozed off again. Oin and Gloin had stayed with me in the kitchen, both lost in their thoughts. I went back to sit with them once I was sure that Balin was fast asleep. His words were still echoing in my head. He wasn't the first one to say something along those lines and I couldn't really ignore it completely.

I sighed as I sat in front of Oin. The bead was still in the middle of the table and the three of us ended up staring at it.

Rather suddenly, Gloin let out a string of Khuzdul that I was quite certain were curses of some sort. Oin's eyebrows shot to his hairline as we both looked at Gloin, who looked up at me and locked his gaze with mine.

"Amelia." He gruffly said. "You are probably the most annoying, stubborn, oblivious and hopeless lass I've ever met." My eyes grew wide as he grumbled those charming words. He took a deep breath and let his clenched fist slam loudly on the table before he added. "But by Mahal's anvil you're my kin and I'd eat my beard before I let you go out of this house without this bead in your hair."

The silence fell heavily in the kitchen as I blinked owlishly. Gloin was more or less glaring at me and I wasn't sure how I was supposed to react.

"What my dim-witted brother is saying." Oin huffed, catching my attention. "Is that we'd be glad if you accepted our kinship braid. It's not every day we meet a worthy addition to our kin."

Gloin harrumphed and crossed his arms, now glaring at the bead.

I couldn't help it and let out a chuckle. The two brothers looked at me right then and I smiled a bit timidly.

"I'd be honoured…" It was all I got to say before they jumped to their feet and started to discuss where exactly they wanted to put my brand new braid.

I didn't move and let them trail their fingers through my hair, obviously making sure to untangle it. Then one of them grazed the braid Nori had made that morning and froze. I felt my cheeks blush a bright red when they moved my hair aside and looked at the braid. I couldn't see their reaction but could tell they were surprised.

"Does it change anything you just said?" I couldn't help but coolly ask, tilting my head to the side just so I could see them from the corner of my eyes.

They exchanged a glance and I could tell that Gloin was frowning.

"You're our kin. Not our ward." Oin huffed and shrugged.

"As long as you're sure…" Gloin started before I interrupted him.

"I am." Two simple words.

I just said two simple words but it felt as if I had proclaimed my undying love loudly. I couldn't help the soft smile on my lips. I couldn't help but let my feelings for Nori shine through, though it was a bit embarrassing.

"That lad doesn't know his luck." Gloin grumbled.

"I do actually."

The three of us looked up to see Nori coming out of the shadows that hid him by the door. I sent what I hoped to be an apologetic look his way but his quick wink let me know he didn't mind.

"You listen to me lad," Gloin started, pointing a threatening finger at Nori. "You better treat her well or even Mahal himself couldn't stop me from coming after you."

Nori smirked rather lazily before he straightened and bowed his head lightly.

"Id-alnâs men." Nori said, his voice sounding slightly hoarse as his eyes fell on me. "I wouldn't dare think of hurting her."

I blushed terribly at his words.

There was a second of silence before Oin nodded.

"Bundul menu denapdul." Gloin's eyes widened a bit before he nodded too, a small smile on his lips. Then he was back to frowning deeply "Your brother is going to throw a fit."

My world crushed at the same instant those words past his lips.

"What?" I squeaked, looking at Nori, wordlessly begging him to explain.

He swore and strode to us.

"Amelia, it's not what you think." He said.

"Dori doesn't want me to be with you?" I whispered, tears in my eyes. "He's the one who…" I couldn't finish that thought. I couldn't quite grasp it or even start to accept it.

"It's more that he doesn't want me to be with you." Nori shook his head while Oin and Gloin decided to keep quiet for awhile. "He doesn't approve yet."

Suddenly I had some sort of epiphany. All those weird discussions, all those glares, all this pent up anger between the two brothers…it couldn't be because of me, could it? I looked up at Nori and he seemed rather sad as he looked back.

"It is not your fault." He repeated lowly.

"Nay it is not." Gloin decided to add.

"Nori isn't exactly the kind of dwarf any good family will hope their daughter will wed." Oin commented as he started to braid my hair.

I wanted to be angry at the statement, but Nori's hand on mine stopped my rant before I even launched in it. I sent him a glare, though he knew perfectly that my anger wasn't directed at him, and he seemed amused. Rolling my eyes I looked away and tried my best not to think about this information.

I knew now why Nori didn't want to speak about it. It mustn't be easy on him either that his own brother didn't trust him. It was annoying and painful at the same time. Obviously Gloin and Oin weren't really thrilled either, but they were at least behaving wisely and didn't utter another word on that particular topic.

Soon enough my right temple was adorning a braid similar to the one Danà had made so long ago. The familiar weight of the bead was reassuring and I didn't fake the bright smile I sent in Oin's and Gloin's way.

"Now that you have an apprentice, don't you think you should wear that one too?" Oin asked before handing me the deep red stone that illustrated my status as a healer. "Actually, you should wear two of them now." He frowned. "You aren't my apprentice anymore, are you?"

"I'll always have things to learn." I smiled at him, though we both knew that this will always be the case for as long as I'd live.

It didn't take long before I wore once more my healer's bead.

"Once we have reclaimed Erebor, I'll get you a second bead." Oin said, gingerly holding the deep red stone that hung in my brand new braid. "Like this you'll be able to wear the twin braids that every master healer has."

"You sure?" I couldn't help but hesitate a bit.

"It's only right." Oin smiled kindly and then bent down to press his forehead against mine. "You'll be a great healer Amelia, I just know it."

His words meant more to him than I could have imagined. I felt warmth spread in my chest and I smiled brightly at him.

"I'll do my best." I swore to him and he nodded, obviously he didn't doubt my words.

As I let my fingers graze my renewed braids, I wondered if anything I had done in the past month had been worthwhile. So far all I knew was that Oin and Gloin seemed to truly acknowledge me. They weren't doing this out of duty or honour. Now that I thought about it, it was rather obvious that it was their notions of honour that had made the dwarves welcome me at first. Of course, this wasn't to say that they weren't doing it as a kindness either. But I was sure that many people in this world were lost or helpless, yet to my knowledge I had been the only human ward in their halls. Was it because I was a woman? Was it because I had no home back then? I honestly couldn't tell for sure. The one thing I could be sure of, was that in their minds, they hadn't expected me to help them or be of any use to them. The fact that I was a healer had been a bonus, but in a way I didn't think it was enough for them to really want me as a part of their community.

Now though...

Now we all knew each other better.

The fact that I had removed those beads had the unpredicted effect to actually make them think about my place within their world. And now that I was playing with my healer bead, I could tell that Oin and Gloin genuinely believed I was one of them. Not because I needed to be protected, but just because of who I was.

And by Mahal's forge, it felt good to realize that.

Oin and Gloin perceived me as one of their own. Truly. I didn't know for sure where the other stood about this, but at the moment I was already happy.

Loud voices had to break me from my thoughts again.

Gloin wasn't by my side anymore, and Nori was busy ignoring Oin's intense threatening glare.

"What's going on this time?" I asked them.

Nori shrugged but, as I recognized Bain's voice in the middle of the loud grumbles, I decided to go and investigate.

Bain was actually standing in front of the door, arms extended to bar the way. The dwarves were glaring at him and they were starting to loudly voice their annoyance. Sigrid was holding a scared Tilda slightly away from it all.

I rolled my eyes and sighed.

I knew the dwarves wouldn't hurt a child, or at least I thought so. Children and women were almost sacred in dwarvish culture. I had battled with Dori about it often enough. Hell, it was even one of the things that had caused the whole mess I was in with those dwarves. So yes, I knew perfectly well they would never hurt Bain.

But Bain, Sigrid and Tilda didn't know that.

I sighed softly and easily made my way to the boy. I placed a hand on his shoulder and smiled at him reassuringly.

"What's this?" I asked around to no one in particular.

"That child believes he can stop us from going out." Dwalin growled.

I looked at Bain while he huffed, trying to look brave though I could feel him slightly shiver.

"Da said you shouldn't go out." Bain lifted his chin as he spoke.

"Why are you trying to go?" I looked at Thorin, unsure about what they were planning this time.

His eyes were locked on my braid for a moment, then he looked at me but I couldn't decipher his thoughts. He seemed to hesitate for a moment. I somehow knew that he wanted to tell me off for being so nosy. He surprised me though when, instead of glowering at me, he spoke rather calmly and rationally.

"We need weapons. Night has fallen, we need to act."

I was surprised to realize that it was indeed night time. Where was Bard? Instead of pondering on this I squeezed Bain's shoulder and pushed him away from the door.

"But Amelia." The boy started to complain.

"There's no use trying to stop them." I kindly told him before looking back at Thorin. "Please, if you do get caught, don't mention Bard. I'll also have Bilbo, Dori, Balin and Bombur moved to my place."

"Amelia..." Bain tried to speak again but a stern look was all it took for him to be quiet.

The dwarves didn't wait long before they simply left once Bain was out of their way. As he passed the threshold, Thorin and I exchanged a glance. He didn't say a word and once again I was left wondering whether anyone in this world understood that dwarf.

I hesitated for a moment, wondering whether or not it would be wise for me to try and get the four sick persons out of here. I knew I could probably carry Bilbo and if I woke Bombur, he'd probably be able to walk to my place, but I was reluctant to do it. Yet I somehow knew that they couldn't stay here.

"Bain," I called the boy who looked at me curiously. "Does your father still have his old boat under your house?"

* * *

><p>Well, I exhaled loudly, looking at the four now occupied beds in my infirmary. This had been quite the adventure and if Bain and Sigrid hadn't helped me, I probably wouldn't have been able to do it.<p>

Bilbo and Balin had been easy enough to move. Bilbo was scarily light and Balin had been half awake and had managed to take a few steps while Bain and I supported him. Thankfully Bombur had indeed been able to walk, though really shakily, and Sigrid had been there to help him stand.

Dori had been another story altogether. In the end it had taken all three of us to carry him down to the boat where Balin, Bilbo and Bombur were already hidden under blankets. Bain had been able to manoeuvre his father's boat quite well and we had reached the shore not too far from my house rather quickly. After that though, it had been even more complicated to get the four members of Thorin's company back inside my ward. We hadn't heard from the others yet, and Bard seemed to have disappeared earlier. As I didn't want Tilda to stay alone for too long, I quickly told Sigrid and Bain to leave, though I thanked them profusely for their help.

And now I was alone, looking at the three sleeping dwarves and one coughing hobbit. I wasn't expecting anyone to knock at my door, but someone did anyway, and I was shocked to see Sigrid. She had left my place maybe half an hour ago. Why was she here so soon? She was panting and took a big gulp of air before she looked at me and said in a rush.

"The dwarves, they've been caught!"

I blinked then sighed and pinched the bridge of my nose. Why wasn't I surprised?

"Where are they now?" I asked her.

"They're all in front of the town's master's house." She said as I was already grabbing my coat and following her outside. "And dad left to go there too, as soon as he came back."

We rushed through the empty streets until we arrived at the town's centre place. It was crowded but when people recognized me, they would, as was usual now, let me pass. Once I finally managed to get through the crowd, I could see that the situation could easily turn very badly. Bard was glowering at Thorin who was glaring at Legolas who stood near the town's master. For a second I felt dizzy. Of course Legolas had to come back earlier than planned. Of course he had to be there when those dwarves were caught stealing weapons.

"They are my father's prisoners. Thranduil will not take kindly that you helped them." Legolas said at the master who seemed completely unable to deal with the situation.

"Thranduil had no reason to imprison us, and does the elf truly help the people here?" Thorin bellowed, turning to the crowd. "I remember days when this town was rich. Was it thanks to the elves? Or was it thanks to the dwarves?"

The town's people started to murmur and mutter when Bard took a step forward and decided to speak.

"You can't believe that Smaug is dead. If you enter that mountain, it'll be the death of us all."

The master glared at Bard and decided to speak.

"And what do you know, bargeman? Wasn't it your forefather's lack of skills that let the dragon live?" His voice was venomous and his hate for Bard clearly shone through.

The town's folk all started to discuss between each other but I didn't really care about what they would say. I was more focused on the situation in front of me. Clearly different powers were clashing and I wasn't sure yet who would be victorious.

"The elves have helped this town. Without our trade and our protection," Legolas started before Thorin interrupted him.

"You are the ones benefiting from those trades, elf, not the people here."

"Do not act as if you care for those humans, Oakenshield, we all know you don't." Legolas replied in calm, yet rather menacing tone.

It was going to turn into a full on fight if no one sensible intervened.

"If you go into that mountain, you'll be the cause of our death." Bard insisted though no one seemed to listen to him.

"Enough bargeman!" The master sharply ordered before turning towards Legolas and Thorin.

"If you help us," Thorin was busy calling at the people. "Then I can promise riches to all people of Laketown. This town has been surviving long enough, it is time for its people to rise again and thrive!"

The loud cheers from the crowd seemed enough to convince the master who loudly claimed he would help Thorin's company.

Legolas scowled and started to stride away. Following a sudden impulse, I rushed after him, not bothering to check whether or not anyone had seen me. The prince was fast, and I soon found myself half running after him in empty streets.

"Legolas," I called, "Legolas, wait!"

He stopped and turned, obviously angry beyond measure. I immediately stopped in my tracks. Slightly shocked by his anger, I took a step back. It was really dark in this small street, an alley really, but the moonlight was more than enough for me to see Legolas' scowl.

"Are these dwarves the ones you travelled with?" He sharply asked.

It startled me a bit, but after a second I quickly recovered.

"Yes. Thorin Oakenshield is the one who welcomed me in the Blue Mountains." I replied honestly.

"Why do you follow such a greedy, deceitful person?" Legolas coldly wondered. "Dwarves aren't to be trusted, you should know that by now."

"I can't say that they are right in all their actions," I started calmly, "But isn't that the same with everyone?" Legolas stared at me but kept silent. I sighed. "Legolas, I don't know what's going to happen next, but..." I hesitated for a second before shaking my head. "But if you were the one struggling to get back to a home that was stolen from you, wouldn't you discard whatever stands in your way? Dwarves have lived in exile long enough. They have a right to go back to this mountain."

"They are trifling with forces they know nothing about." Legolas almost spat.

"I am not saying they are right or that it isn't reckless, but can't you put yourself in their place?" I almost pleaded.

"Amelia, they can't win against a fire breather. They will all perish and will endanger everyone living in this region." Legolas shook his head.

His words made fear grow again in my chest. Legolas was old, and maybe this didn't equal to wise, but surely it meant he wasn't completely clueless. How could he be so certain that the dwarves would fail in their quest?

"Then it will be so." I heard myself say, though I was shocked by my own words.

"How can you say that?" Legolas was obviously shocked too. "We aren't talking about a dozen dwarves here, we're talking about dozen of human families, and hundreds of elves..."

"Because I know what it feels like!" I snapped at Legolas, not allowing him to continue. "Legolas, I know what it's like to be ripped away from all you know. I know how it feels to be lost, to not have any home left. I can't say that I would want to go back, not anymore, but still, hadn't those dwarves been there for me I don't know what I'd done. They have the possibility, however slim, to go back home. They should take it! You don't know how hard life has been for them! You don't know how humans treat them! You're a prince Legolas, an elf prince who never had to fight to get his home back."

"Your words illustrate well your ignorance." Legolas intervened suddenly calmly, cutting me mid-rant. He shook his head and I felt he was somehow disappointed."You have no idea how our people suffer from the growing darkness or how it affects us. You have no knowledge of the battle we fought. Neither do you k..."

"Then why can't you understand Thorin?!" I exclaimed loudly.

We both stood there, glaring at each others before I took a deep breath and sighed loudly.

"I meant what I said yesterday. I appreciate your company." I softly said. "And I know you are capable of understanding what they feel. I'm sorry if I spoke out of turn though."

He remained silent for a moment before looking at me.

"I accept your apology." He pondered for a second before continuing. "And I apologise too. It is obvious you feel strongly for those dwarves and your loyalty isn't a bad trait." He sighed and looked away before glancing back at me. "Be careful Amelia. You did swear to help my father and he won't forget those words. There might come a day where you'll have to choose, and my father has no pity for those who break their words."

"I won't break my word to him Legolas. Unless what he asks of me turns out to be impossible, I won't."

"I hope for your sake it won't turn out as I think it might." Legolas ominously said before he nodded at me and left, leaving me wondering in the middle of the street.

I looked at him until his tall, lean form disappeared in the night, and then I remained there, standing alone in the cold night.

Or so I thought...

"You're playing a dangerous game, Mizimul."

Nori's voice startled me and as I turned around I couldn't see him at first. He finally came out of the shadows in a small passage way, quite far from where I stood. I sighed and walked to him.

"I'm not playing Nori." I said tiredly.

"Allying yourself with Thranduil wasn't wise." He commented, though I knew he wasn't chastising me. He was merely worried.

"Wasn't it?"

I glanced around and, seeing no one, didn't hesitate before I hid my face against Nori's shoulder. He embraced me and pressed a kiss against my temple.

"I don't think Thorin would be happy to hear of it." He shrugged before adding softly. "And Thranduil won't appreciate your loyalty to us either. Being between the hammer and the anvil is never a good place to be."

I snorted, of course he would use such a metaphor.

"At the time I didn't have much choice. Thranduil was the only one who could help me cross the forest. And besides I talked a lot with Legolas, and I got to say that the elves' anger against the dwarves isn't completely unfounded."

Nori huffed but didn't reply.

We remained half hidden by the shadows for awhile before Nori spoke again.

"What if Thranduil makes you choose between your word and your loyalty to us?"

I clenched my fists against Nori's coat and glared at the wall behind him. Then I sighed yet again. I was doing that a lot recently.

"I will see when the time comes." I whispered and I felt Nori tense. "But you do know that whatever Thorin or Thranduil may ask of me, my loyalty first and foremost goes to you, right?" I blushed a bit as I said that, though I meant it.

Nori kissed my temple again and hummed.

"I know Mizimul. And I'll stand by you, whatever you choose."

And those words made my heart clench because I knew he meant them. At that moment I knew with certainty that I couldn't force Nori to follow me if ever I had to go against Thorin. Not if it was to obey Thranduil's orders.

Slowly I shook my head.

"Promise me to stay quiet, whatever happens, and don't you dare break your own word for me."

"Mizimul..."

"I'm serious Nori." I leant back to look at him. "I'll deal with this myself. Don't break Thorin's trust for me. You're smarter than that."

A noise indicating that someone was making its way in our direction forced us to step back from one another.

"This discussion isn't over." Nori quickly whispered at me.

"Yes it is." I whispered back and we both ended up glaring at the other, though there wasn't any heat behind those glares. We were both merely worried about the other, and we both knew it.

* * *

><p>It turned out that the master wasn't too sure about what to do now that Legolas had stormed out. In the end, he offered to help the dwarves but quickly retreated into the safety of his home, not bothering to think about where they would go. Alfrid told Thorin to come back in the morning to discuss further how the master would help them in their quest and soon enough everyone scurried away, leaving the dwarves alone.<p>

I couldn't help but snort a bit.

Of course, they all agreed to help, but insofar that they'll give weapons and then will happily await Thorin's promised riches. No one truly wanted to get a dozen dwarves in his home. I sighed and walked to Thorin who was clearly as bitter as I was about these men's behaviour.

"Well," I said softly, catching his attention, "Do you all plan to stay here or will you follow me?"

He didn't say a word as he simply nodded.

I informed him though, that our four friends were already at my place, and then we all left. As we arrived, I opened the door and gestured for them all to go in. I could see that they were all quite curious to have a look around my place and I let them enter first. Besides, Nori was slightly behind and I wouldn't miss an occasion to be close to him.

The dwarves didn't say anything at first when they entered my house, though Bofur offered me a kind smile.

"Well, it's not a bad place. You got space." He winked at me before adding. "Our little lady was well treated, wasn't she? At least you were perfectly safe here."

"Not really, anyone can come in through her bedroom window." Nori muttered lowly behind me. Obviously he was still annoyed by our discussion and didn't pay attention to his words.

There was a lull as Bofur immediately jumped to attention, thankfully he was the only one still in the entrance with me and Nori.

"And how would you know that?" The teasing glint in his eyes made me blush.

"Err..." Nori was speechless and obviously unsure of what to say, which only worsened my own embarrassment.

Bofur laughed happily at our faces and clapped Nori loudly on the shoulder.

"My friend, now I know why I couldn't seem to find you yesterday. My, my, and here I thought our little Nori had sworn off women." His teasing smile was kind as he winked at me and I couldn't help but snort.

"Shut it." Nori grumbled, pinching the bridge of his nose.

"Who wants ale?" I suddenly shouted, trying anything to distract Bofur from the topic.

"Already found it!" Kili's voice shouted back from my kitchen.

I didn't waste any time and immediately strode away to see what the others were doing. I had no intention of waiting around and let Bofur tease me mercilessly, even though I was quite sure Nori wouldn't let our friend go too far.

The dwarves had already made themselves at home, as Kili and Fili had opened the barrel of ale, and Gloin was busy lighting the fire in my stove. Most of the others were pillaging my cellar, but I didn't mind too much. I could already hear Dwalin complain about the quantity of vegetables I was hiding in there.

Thorin walked to me then and remained silent for a moment before he sighed and glanced in my direction.

"I am glad to see you accepted Oin's and Gloin's beads." He grumbled in a low tone I barely heard.

"I," I hesitated and ended up shaking my head. "I was stupid." I finally said. "I understand now, I think, what you meant." He nodded though he didn't look at me. "But I don't think I was completely wrong." I couldn't help but add stubbornly.

"Maybe you weren't." He muttered. After a while he added in a very low, very calm voice, speaking softly as if he wanted to avoid hurting me. "You're not a dwarf Amelia."

It pained me a bit to hear someone else say it. Of course I knew this, it was plain obvious, but still...

"I know." I whispered.

"And I won't have you as our ward anymore." He said with such finality that I knew he meant it.

For a second, fear gripped my heart before he sighed and finally looked at me. His icy blue eyes locked with mine and he remained quiet for long seconds before he finally voiced his thoughts.

"Here."

I couldn't believe he actually wouldn't explain what he meant. Instead he handed me something that I quickly caught and then he turned away. I didn't need to open my palm to know he had just given me a bead, though it didn't make sense. I frowned and looked at it. It was a simple one, made of some sort of metal, copper maybe, and I could only read two sets of rune on it. One, I knew, where the runes used exclusively by Durin's line, but I had no idea why he would give me this.

Instead of making false assumption, I quickly went to Bofur and Nori, who were still arguing in low voices in the corridor.

"What does this mean?" I asked, not even bothering to listen their friendly argument. I opened my palm so they could see the bead.

Bofur whistled and then smiled.

"That, lass, means you're recognized as an adult of the Longbeard's clan."

There was a short moment of silence during which I blinked stupidly at Bofur.

"What?"

"Durin's folks are known as the Longbeards' clan. Balin, Dwalin, Gloin and Oin are directly related to Durin too. Dori, Ori and I are from that clan too, though I think it was one of our great great and so on grandmother who married into the clan." Nori started to look pensive as Bofur snorted and decided to take part in the discussion.

"Aye. They're all part of the Longbeard's, either directly or through an old marriage." Bofur nodded. "Bombur, Bifur and I are another story. We're not technically descended from the Longbeards' clan. But at some point our forefather needed help and begged Durin's folks." Bofur was obviously enjoying telling this tale. "And the King at that time granted our family asylum. Durin's folk became our saviours that day and earned our unending loyalty." I could tell he was happy to speak about this. "And then, after years and years and years...well you get the meaning, so well, after years of loyalty the King granted us with beads similar to that one, allowing us to become Longbeards."

"Longbeards...what clan are you from then?" I couldn't help but ask.

"My ol' Ma loved to say we used to be Firebeards." He replied happily.

"Firebeards?"

"Yeah well, as interesting as Bofur's family history is..." Nori intervened, though he was smiling too. "That's not really the matter at hand, right?" He pointed at my bead and I nodded. "So, about the Longbeards… Well, currently, Thorin is our chief, but you knew that. When a dwarf comes of age, he or she receives a bead indicating that he or she is now recognized as an adult member of our clan. It is similar to that one. Also, as Bofur told you, a dwarf can be granted such a bead by the king. It happens when the king believes that the person deserves to be a part of our clan." Nori explained, though his eyes didn't leave my palm. "So Mizimul...Where did you get that?" I could tell he most likely had an idea and just wanted a confirmation.

"Thorin, of course." I replied. "What do I do now? What does this mean? What should I do?"

"It means that if you go to Thorin, and kindly ask him to, he'll braid it in your hair." Bofur smiled cheerfully and Nori rolled his eyes at his antics.

"And more importantly it means that dwarves will recognize you as a member of our oldest clan. It means you can claim to receive a true status within our Halls." Nori explained more seriously before lightly flicking my healer's bead. "And a healer's status is among the highest ones. Though Dís and Oin will have precedence over you."

"I don't want status." I muttered and he nodded as he completely understood me.

"You'll be accepted." He softly said, offering me one of his rare smiles.

"It means I'll have to obey whatever he orders me to do?" I couldn't but glumly ask.

"Well, as much as we all obey." Bofur shrugged. "But you'll also be able to voice your opinion and actually be listened to." He winked at me and I rolled my eyes.

"He's offering you a second chance." Nori murmured then, not saying what he thought of it, though it was clear enough. "A better chance too..."

I nodded but couldn't reply as a bad cough caught my attention. Bilbo truly worried me. I placed the bead in one of the small pockets I had on my tunic and quickly went in the ward. I was pleasantly surprised to see that Balin was actually awake, as was Bombur.

"Balin, Bombur, just give me a moment and I'll bring you something warm to eat." I told them, smiling kindly.

Balin's surprised expression let me know he didn't really remember seeing me earlier. Clearly the dwarf thought he had been hallucinating. After I forced some honeyed decoction down Bilbo's throat, I had a repeat of the previous discussion I had with other dwarves. Why was I here? How had I arrived? It seemed to be the exact same questions but I answered them again nonetheless.

"And are you going to tell me about these braids I see?" Balin kindly asked.

I blushed a bit and played with my kinship and healer's braids.

"Well, I did talk quite a bit with Gloin and Oin." I said at first before I saw a soft smile on Balin's lips. "I'm glad you're starting to feel better."

"I'm glad we had a chance to meet again my dear."

Instead of replying with words, I slowly bent down to press our foreheads together. It felt good talking again with Balin. We didn't discuss much more that day though, mainly because I still insisted for him to rest.

The dwarves were mighty pleased to see that their companions were slowly getting better. Even Dori, who still hadn't awaken, seemed to be getting better. His fever was steadily going down and I wasn't so worried anymore.

It took two more days before Bombur was back on his feet, maybe a bit weaker but definitely healthy. Balin was doing much better, and Bilbo wasn't coughing anymore and was simply bedridden. Dori had finally awoken too and I wasn't about to forget his reaction at seeing me.

I was busy rearranging some ointments in my cupboard when I heard him grumble and moan. Quickly I turned around, Dori hadn't made much sounds while unconscious so it warranted my attention. As I arrived near his bed I could see him cry in his sleep. Shocked, I placed a hand on his shoulder and tried to wake him up.

"Dori." I called as I shook him softly. "Dori, you hear me?"

"Amelia?" He moaned though I doubted he was fully conscious. "My poor Amelia...where are you now?"

I felt my heart skip a beat and a painful lump in my throat.

"Dori, wake up, I'm here. I'm with you." I insisted.

I jolted when his eyes opened suddenly. I could tell he was scared to see me though, and that didn't bode well.

"No." He moaned. "No! You can't be here. My poor, poor Amelia is all alone now. She doesn't have anyone. You can't be here. Who are you?" He was getting rather agitated and was even starting to weakly fight against me.

The problem was that, even weakened, Dori was among the strongest of the company.

"Nori!" I called out. "Nori quick, I need help here!" I was struggling against Dori who kept calling for me while not believing I was actually there. It was madness.

"Amelia what's go..." Nori came in before he swore. "Calm down Dori!"

"Brother?" Dori muttered. "Nori...where is Amelia? Why did we abandon her?"

"She's right here Dori. Amelia is safe. She's here with us." Nori was managing his brother with an ease I didn't have. "You don't need to worry anymore."

"She can't be..." Dori breathed out feverishly. "She can't..."

At this point, I could tell he was exhausted. It didn't take long for him to be asleep again. Soon enough, Ori came in and after we told him what had happened, he decided to stay with us. The others had left the room earlier that day and Bilbo was sleeping deeply. The only ones awake in this room were the three brothers and I.

When Dori awoke next, night had already fallen. He was obviously more peaceful, but I still let Nori and Ori move closer to explain the situation. Dori was shocked and seemed to hesitate between several emotions. In order to let the three brothers explain everything between each other, I quickly escape to the kitchen where I prepared a light broth for Dori. When I came back in the ward, Bilbo was still asleep and the three brothers were now all awake and silent. I gave Dori the broth and he wordlessly took it.

The four of us remained there in silence for quite a while. Dori ate and I could tell that even though he was still weak, he wasn't feverish anymore.

I hadn't spoken much with Ori so far, and there were several discussions I wanted to have with Dori. So far I had spent most of my time either taking care of the dwarves, the sick people of Laketown, mending my relationship with the members of Thorin's company or with Nori. Nori sneaked out of the dwarves' room at night to join me and we would spend most of the night outside, on my balcony.

Right then though, I shouldn't think of him and our time together because I clearly had other topics to discuss with Dori.

The only problem was that neither I nor Dori seemed to know what to say and the silence stretched in the room, almost suffocating me.

"Well..." Ori finally said. "We're lucky Amelia ended up here."

This truly wasn't how I had thought this discussion would start.

"Lucky?" Nori repeated questioningly.

"How can you say that?" Dori muttered angrily, glaring at his younger brother. "Do you realize the danger she faced coming here? Do you not realize she's been alone all this time with no one to protect her?"

"And whose fault is that?" Ori spat at Dori, shocking me by his behaviour. "Who decided she shouldn't follow us? Who decided that she had to stay alone?"

"We did it to protect her!" Dori exclaimed. "Can't you see how dangerous this quest is? How many times does she have to nearly die before you realize she could easily disappear?"

"Oy, calm down." Nori tried to intervene but neither of his brothers seemed to care at all.

Suddenly I realized what an impact the whole mess at Beorn's place had on the company. Ori had obviously a lot to say to his brother, and his uncharacteristic anger reminded me of the time he was angry at Nori for being a thief.

"You said yourself that she was all alone now! How in Mahal's name did you think she'd react when you all decided to kick her out of the company?" Ori's cheeks were now turning red in his anger. Dori's silence didn't calm him down. "Do you realize that if she hadn't decided to come here, we might never have seen her again? We're the only family she has here and you," He furiously spat, pointing an accusing finger at his brother. "You are the one who decided to leave her behind. Alone."

There was another long silence after that. Ori was now glaring at the floor while Dori seemed lost in his thoughts, clearly sad ones, and staring at the ceiling. I exchanged a glance with Nori who seemed a bit lost. He truly wasn't used to be in this position. He tended to be the one arguing with Dori and he had obviously no idea what to do right now. In a way it made me realize what an impact my little stunt had on them. Thorin was right. I was a distraction. I could see it and I honestly didn't like it. Maybe it wasn't in the sense Thorin had thought I would be, but I still was distracting some of his dwarves from their quest.

I shook my head, sighing lightly before I placed a hand on Dori's knee.

"I am alright. I am now the main healer of Laketown and this house even belongs to me." I explained calmly, though neither Dori nor Ori looked at me. "People here respect me. I even took an apprentice." I took a deep breath and looked at Nori for a moment before looking back at Dori.

Without looking at me he placed his hand on mine and squeezed it.

"I won't apologize." He muttered. "This quest isn't for you. You shouldn't have come and you shouldn't go further."

Ori was about to react angrily again, I could see it clearly, but I replied before he could.

"Yeah, well, what I do isn't really your concern anymore." My tone wasn't cold or mean. It was perfectly even. I was simply stating a fact. "I'm capable of taking my own decisions and making my own choices. I'm an adult Dori, and I'd like you to at least acknowledge that."

The heavy silence that followed was once more almost suffocating. I couldn't see any real progress being done in this discussion any way so I stood up, mechanically passing my hand in my hair. Since Nori had braided them, I couldn't keep my hand away for long. It was slightly embarrassing but well, I couldn't help it.

I glanced at the three brothers once more, unsure of what to do or say.

Somehow I could tell that by my actions, and Dori's we had created a rift in our relationship. Right now I wasn't sure how to mend it.

It had been relatively easy to accept Gloin's and Oin's bead. It had been easy, not to forgive them, but at the very least accept them again. Balin and I had talked peacefully. He had explained his acts and had clearly told me why he would do it again if he felt he had to. He also didn't have to tell me in much details how he felt when I removed his bead, because I could see it stringed on a leather necklace he hadn't worn before. He listened to me when I told him how I felt at the time. After that he had kindly smiled at me, letting me know he was proud to see me here and now. It had been so easy to speak with him that we ended up talking about my life in Laketown. He had seemed genuinely interested and proud when I told him about Sigrid. Yes, talking with him and Gloin and Oin had been fairly easy.

But it was somehow harder to do so with Dori. I had trusted him so much. In my heart he was a member of my family and his betrayal, whatever his reasons were, seemed to have hurt me far more than the others.

Whatever happened between me and the three brothers, it didn't seem that I could take it lightly or easily put it behind me. I didn't expect nor did I want Dori to apologize. I could understand his point of view. I didn't agree with it, but I understood how and why he thought this way. Still, I was at a loss. I had no idea what I should do or how I should react.

It was with a forlorn sigh that I left them alone and closed the door behind me.

* * *

><p><strong>AN: Yes I know, I'm late. This time though, I don't think it'll be honest of me to apologize, because my mind truly had other more important things to do. I lost someone who, though he was old, had been a true constant face in my world since the day of my birth and I was stricken with grief. He used to ask me why I didn't just publish my work. He truly didn't understand why I couldn't just publish this as it was a fanfiction but well...he didn't really understand what a fanfiction was. I won't wish you all a happy new year...because it's late, and because this person ended up going to the hospital on the night of the 30st of December. He died in January and I then had to write the tribute (?) and prepare a speech for the church ... so nope, I didn't feel like writing about the dwarves for a while.  
><strong>

**On a more cheerful (and interesting for you all I'm sure) note, I do hope this chapter was to your liking. It was terribly hard to write. I wrote pieces of it for months on end and I can't tell you how painful the editing felt.**

**On a side note. As you know, I'm not a native English speaker. I'm typing this though with a British dictionnary (as some if not all of you have guessed) hence the choice of spelling with "honour" instead of "honor" for example. I'm saying this because, of just one word I wasn't too sure about, "manoeuvre" the way I understand it from the dictionary I consulted, it was fine to use it in this sentence. If some of you are experts of British English or native speakers, could you please confirm that? My beta and I weren't sure but I decided to go against her advice and use it (I'm stubborn!)**

**The good news though, is that I have now decided for sure what I'm going to do with the story. I am going to write the third part, though I can't yet say how long it'll be. At any rate, I don't think the story is close to being finished. I am motivated again though and I'm starting to get excited about it. :) **

**The "bad" news is that I'm moving (again) and changing life (again) so I might not have as much time as I used to a year ago...but I guess I'm now known as that annoying writer who updates when she feels like it... Sorry for that. I do know it's annoying for you guys. I'm almost sure (major trouble happening aside) that I'll be able to update next month. **

**Thank you all for the reviews, follows and favourites. **


	60. Last Goodbye

**As usual, it all belongs to JRRTolkien, except for my OC(s)**

* * *

><p>I couldn't help but frown as I left the town's master house and went back to my place. Sigrid was following me in silence and I was glad for it. I really appreciated the girl, but I had a lot on my mind right now. My mood wasn't even due to the master or Alfrid. Since they knew I was somehow related to the dwarves and still under Thranduil's protection, I was untouchable and could say or do almost whatever I wanted.<p>

No, what bothered me was currently training in the small space behind my house that passed as my back yard.

The dwarves had been living here for a week now. All the dwarves were healthy again, or at least as healthy as they could be, and even Bilbo was doing much, much better. The hobbit was weakened by his illness but seemed on the way to completely recover. Thorin though, didn't seem to want to wait anymore and kept pestering me about Bilbo. Clearly he didn't want to kill the hobbit, but he would do something drastic if I didn't declare Bilbo was in good health soon. Some of the dwarves were getting fidgety. Clearly, they didn't like being so close to Erebor and yet stuck in Laketown.

Fili and Kili spent their days training with Dwalin, Gloin and Bifur. Oin was relatively happy to help out in the wards, though there wasn't that much to do. Balin and Thorin spent most of their time with the town's master, discussing what help the man agreed to give. Ori was often sulking, writing in his notebook or discussing in hushed tones with Nori or even Bofur. Dori was either with Balin and Thorin, or was discussing angrily with Nori and Bofur. All in all, Nori and Bofur were the ones trying to mend the rift between me, Ori and Dori.

I hadn't tried to talk again with my previous guardian. I had honestly been too busy. Besides, I had no idea what to say to him.

I hated this situation.

Dori was one of the most important dwarves in my life before we both let this stupid situation fester.

"Amelia?" Sigrid called me and I glanced in her direction, letting her know I was listening. "How did you meet those dwarves?"

I took a moment to ponder before I replied.

"They saved my life and took me in." It was the shortest way to put it, and it was the simple truth.

I kept walking as I replied. Sigrid seemed to stagger a bit at my words though, so I looked over my shoulder at her.

"They raised you?" She asked, clearly surprised.

Her eyes were widely opened and she stood in the middle of the way, shocked. I smirked at first and shook my head.

"No." I snorted. "I was an adult already when I came to live in their Halls. But since then, they protected me and took care of me."

Sigrid nodded and frowned, obviously thinking about this piece of information. I smiled softly, aware that it must be surprising to hear. Dwarves weren't really known for their kindness towards human strangers.

It had always annoyed me and still made me sad. Even now I could only hear the truth behind those words I just told Sigrid. The dwarves had always protected me and Dori especially. Though his mother hen tendencies had sometimes caused trouble between us, I couldn't deny how much he cared for me.

And this was partly the reason why I didn't know what to do right now.

I wasn't sure whether it was pride or something else entirely, but I couldn't seem to be able to simply go talk with him. It was stupid. The situation was rather tense, and maybe the fact that I knew Dori disagreed with Nori and I being a couple, didn't help.

I breathed slowly. Sigrid and I had been standing there for some time now, both lost in our thoughts. Shaking my head to clear it, I smiled at my apprentice and lightly taped her shoulder. She startled a bit before offering me a small, shy smile. I didn't say a word at first, and simply started back on our way. She quickly followed behind me.

"How's your father?" I asked Sigrid a few minutes later, trying to think about something else entirely.

"He's quite annoyed with the dwarves and the master." She said softly. "He's really worried. He thinks they're going to wake the dragon."

I could tell she was worried too. A deep frown marred her features and she was clenching her hands together. I looked away and up at the sky. To be perfectly franc, the thought of a dragon attacking the dwarves didn't sit well with me either. But worrying about it seemed to be a luxury, and it wouldn't do me any good to think too much about such things.

"The dragon hasn't been seen in ages." I replied, trying to sound confident. I felt as if I was repeating someone else's words though. "He's probably dead already." I really wanted to believe that, and I didn't want to think about the consequences if it wasn't true. Yet, a small, dark place in my heart couldn't help but doubt.

"Maybe."She sighed. "It's our ancestor who couldn't kill the dragon when it came and attacked Dale." She whispered, as if ashamed of that fact.

As I turned my head to look at her, I realized that she truly was ashamed of it. Her ancestor hadn't been able to kill a dragon and she thought it was shameful? That was somehow laughable.

"Sigrid," I called her softly. "You should be proud that your ancestor was brave enough to face the dragon, let alone try and attack it. Not many men would be so strong." I said truthfully.

She offered me a small, uncertain smile but I didn't insist. It wasn't my place to do so. Besides, we were now back at my home and I didn't think this topic would be a good one to have in front of the dwarves.

Most of them were outside and I truly wanted some time for myself right now, so I simply told Sigrid she could go back to her place and study the notes I had given her the day before. I checked on Bilbo who was napping peacefully before I quietly walked upstairs.

Taking a nap sounded like a great idea right then so I kicked my boots to the side and let myself fall on my bed. I closed my eyes and tried not to think about what bothered me. I needed to rest a bit. Since the dwarves appearance I felt as if my head was swirling with all kind of thoughts and it was tiresome. I was overjoyed to see them all, sure, but so many topics were bringing me worry and pain right now.

I had no idea how long I stayed like this, half dozing off, half conscious, but I heard a soft ruffling noise before some weight settled next to me on the bed. Oddly enough I didn't need to open my eyes to know exactly who it was. I hummed softly when he took my hand and kissed my knuckles.

"How do you feel?" He asked, not letting go of my left hand.

I opened my eyes and looked at him. Nori was currently sitting next to me, his back against the wall. I let my eyes trail over his form. His hair were up in that weird, haircut of his, and one of his braided eyebrows was slightly quirked upward. His grey eyes were looking right back at me and I could see his trademark smirk, even though it was half hidden by his beard.

"I'm alright." I muttered, though we both knew I really wasn't.

He shook his head and looked at me sternly.

"You both should talk." He finally said before tilting his head a bit. "Actually, you should talk to Ori too."

I pouted and looked away. I didn't know what to say right now.

"They both miss you, and I really don't get why you and Ori don't talk." He continued when he realized I wasn't about to talk. "Really, he obviously missed you and didn't want to leave you behind. I don't understand why you two won't speak together."

He was right. But I truly had no clue either. Why wasn't I speaking with Ori? I blinked and tried to come up with a viable reason but couldn't.

My silence was most unusual. It made Nori frown and sigh. Clearly, this whole situation was annoying him quite a lot as he kept on talking, I felt as if our roles had just been reversed.

"Mizimul, you know we'll leave soon. I'd really appreciate that you talk with them both." He insisted as I remained silent. "You three are so stubborn." He ended up groaning, pinching the bridge of his nose.

That made me snort.

"That's rich coming from you." I finally said with a smile and he shrugged.

"Maybe, but it doesn't mean I'm wrong." He retorted easily, looking at me seriously.

I sighed and looked away. I could feel the heat in my cheeks as I blushed. It was odd to feel chastised this way by Nori.

"I know." I admitted. "I just don't know what to say. I don't understand Ori's behaviour and I really don't know what to say to Dori." I finally confessed.

After a short while spent in silence I sat up next to him and let my head fall on his shoulder.

"Yesterday Balin gave me back the guardianship bead, but he engraved it." As I spoke I took the small bead made of amethyst out of the small pocket and showed it to Nori.

"This rune is for kin." He commented simply.

"I know. But the stone..." I took a moment before I finished my thought. "Does it mean he'll be my guardian again? That I'll be his ward?"

"Not exactly." Nori replied, squeezing my hand a bit. "Your relationship to him would be slightly different. You'll be less dependent on him, like a ward is, and more equal, like kin."

"Why is it so complicated?" I said, slightly exasperated and he chuckled.

Some noise right then made us aware that the other dwarves were starting to come back. Noiselessly Nori started to move away when I used the fact that he still held my hand to tug on his arm. He looked at me quizzically until I simply leant forward and softly kissed him.

"I love you." I whispered against his lips.

"I know." He replied before kissing me lightly and then standing back. "I'll see you later."

I nodded and watched him go before I stood up too and put on my boots. I had to find Ori. Nori was right, I needed to speak with his brothers. Even though it probably would be awkward, the more I waited, the worse it would become. I hadn't lie either when I told him I didn't know what to make of Ori's behaviour.

It was odd though, because the prospect of talking to him seemed terrible at that point. It shouldn't have been like this, actually, it should have been the exact opposite. I shouldn't be afraid or uncomfortable when I wanted to talk to Ori. He was a brother to me.

I walked down the stairs, nodding absentmindedly at Bifur as I did so, and went to the kitchen. I didn't have to look far to find Ori, sitting at the table and currently busy writing in his notebook. He wasn't alone either. Nori of course was here, sitting in the only shadowy corner. Bofur, Bombur and Balin were there too, though busy talking together.

I tried to stay nonchalant as I walked to Bombur and stole a piece of ham right under his nose. He smiled kindly at me. Even though I tried to ignore it, I could tell that Nori was observing me. As I turned slightly and glanced above my shoulder, I saw him raise one of his braided eyebrows. He didn't seem to be impressed by my behaviour. I rolled my eyes at him, but he didn't react.

Feeling somehow chastised once again I cleared my throat lightly and went to stand beside Ori. The youngest brother didn't even look at me and it made me sad. I placed my hand on his shoulder, hoping he would then acknowledge my presence, but I could only feel him tense and pause before he resumed writing. At this point, I felt my eyes sting a bit. A large lump was already forming in my throat and I knew that if I didn't manage to talk with Ori right then, I might just cry.

Glancing at Nori, I saw him frown before he looked at the other dwarves around. Wordlessly they all left, except Nori who remained behind with me and Ori.

The silence was tensed and heavy.

Nori was observing Ori and me alternatively. The whole situation was unsettling and I looked quite desperately at Nori who just quirked an eyebrow. Obviously he thought that I should deal with this on my own.

I cleared my throat and took a deep breath.

"Ori?" It was the only word I ended up saying.

Mentally I was screaming at myself. What was going on? Wasn't I able to speak normally anymore? Couldn't I do proper sentences? This was ridiculous.

"Yes, Amelia?" He replied tensely.

It probably was the fact that he used my full name and not the nickname he had given me that upsetted me the most at that moment. Nori nodded at me encouragingly as I glanced yet again in his direction.

"Are you..." I hesitated, looking for words though I had no idea what to say exactly. "Are you alright?"

"Why wouldn't I be?" He didn't even look up and kept writing in his notebook.

Oddly enough I felt like a little girl trying to talk to an angry adult right then. Hadn't it been for Nori who kept encouraging me silently, I would probably have run away already.

"I..." I was at a loss. "I don't know." I breathed out, looking down.

"Don't you?"

Oh my...this was turning into a real nightmare. It reminded me of the few times my uncle had been angry at me back when I was a kid. When I did something particularly stupid he wouldn't yell at me or punish me. No. He would just ignore me and then would make me understand quietly that he was angry. Instead of telling me why, he would make me say it, he would force me to acknowledge my mistakes. Right then I realized that was exactly what Ori was trying to do.

"Are you really that angry with me?" I finally whispered before taking a step back. "You know I didn't have a choice."

"Didn't you?" He muttered.

"What..." I started to reply but Ori suddenly stood up, efficiently surprising me.

I took a few steps back, absent-mindedly noticing that Nori was tense too. Ori was probably shorter than I, but right now, it felt as if he towered over me. I blinked a few times, shocked.

"Didn't you really have no other choice but to throw away those beads and everything they stood for?" He glowered at me.

Well, he was really, really angry and it was the first time I saw his anger directed at me. For a moment I was left speechless before righteous anger flowed through my veins.

"What did you want me to do?" I retorted, more than slightly angry that he would behave this way with me. "Did you think I would appreciate being abandoned and betrayed?"

"You're the only one who saw this as a betrayal Amelia!" He exclaimed exasperatedly, throwing his hands upwards.

His sudden reaction shocked me more than I would have thought. I was left looking at him stupidly, mouth partially open, and completely unable to form a thought coherent enough to put into a sentence.

"You keep saying we betrayed you, but the way I see it, you're the one who betrayed us all." Ori angrily ranted. "You threw our care right back in our faces. Can you imagine what it was like to mourn you as if you had died? Because, in case you didn't know, it's what happened. You were dead to us. Can you imagine how it felt?"

"And you, can't you imagine how I felt?" I seemed to find my voice again, though it was slightly hoarse. "I've tried so hard, I've done so much in order to be acknowledged by you all. I've done everything I could in order to be respected and accepted by you all. These past two years I did my best to fit in, to live up to your standards." I didn't look at either of them as I spoke. Oddly enough I wasn't angry anymore. Now though, tiredness and sadness were battling within my chest. "I've done everything I could." I repeated once more, very softly. "And all I got was an order to step back. I was told how useless and helpless I was. How do you think that felt?"

We were both silent for awhile.

"I had to mourn you." He repeated stubbornly, looking down and I had to swallow thickly in a silly attempt to fight back the tears that threatened to fall.

"And I was left all alone." I muttered and looked down at my feet, unable to look at him any longer.

The silence was tensed and heavy once more. I wanted to cry but was doing my best not to. After what felt like an eternity someone cleared his throat, catching both my and Ori's attention. We looked at Nori who was still sitting at the table; he was carving something into a piece of wood. He had a carefree attitude and didn't even look at us as he spoke.

"So..." He tilted his head slightly as he said this on an even tone. "Basically..." He took his time, pausing and seemingly not really paying attention to us. "You both missed the other terribly and don't want for the situation to be repeated."

He didn't say anything else and didn't even glance our way. I shyly looked in Ori's direction then and saw that he was behaving much in the same way I was. We exchanged a glance.

Suddenly, instead of standing alone I was being held tightly by Ori and I was hugging him just as tightly.

"I'm so sorry!" We both said at the same time with broken voices.

It must have been a somewhat pathetic sight, really, but being cross with Ori had been one of the worst things I did. I just couldn't stay annoyed or angry with him. And clearly the feeling was shared. Currently we were both crying against the other's shoulder. It felt good though, to hug him so tightly. I had missed him so much and I could only hope that this would be the only apology needed for us to go back to our usual relationship.

After a while we finally let go of the other, though we stayed close, both sniffing loudly and sporting puffy eyes. Nori was still there, shaking his head and smirking, but neither of us commented on what had just happened.

Still sniffing a bit, I wiped the last tears away with my sleeve and offered a small, shy smile at Ori.

"Do you want to eat something?" I said softly. "I could cook you some eggs."

"I'd love that." He replied kindly.

We looked at each other and some sort of understanding seemed to pass between us. Finally I nodded with a huge smile on my lips. After a last, short hug I quickly went to my cellar and started to cook.

It had been awhile since the last time I could cook for Ori.

As I started to prepare everything, Ori merrily chatted with me. Suddenly I felt as if we were back in Thorin's Halls. I was forced to realize how much I had missed this normalcy and how I longed for this quest to finally be over, so that our lives could continue as they should.

Yes, I longed for it all to be finally over.

* * *

><p>The next few days I spent mostly with Ori. The two of us would often walk together in town and would discuss quietly. I was truly appalled by the way the elves had treated my friends. On the other hand I knew that the dwarves had probably not been the best of guests either. Why did they always complicate everything?<p>

Along with Ori, Bilbo decided to tag along. The hobbit was finally feeling much better and walking outside was good for him, though I insisted that he wore lots of warm clothes at all times. It wasn't as if the weather was nice around here. Even if the sky was cloudless, the air was still dreadfully cold. I couldn't fathom how winter would be.

During our talks, I realized that my hobbit friend hadn't understood the dwarves. Bilbo was the only one who hadn't mourned me, I wasn't actually dead, so it didn't make any sense to him. He hadn't understood their reactions. When the two of us talked it was easy to see that Bilbo had been really unsettled by the dwarves' behaviours.

"It was slightly scary." He said softly while the two of us walked side by side to the market.

Ori had left us a moment ago. He wanted to see some of the books in the master's private library. At this point, the idiotic man was obeying to almost anything as long as it didn't cost him any amount of money. Bilbo and I were thus alone.

"I'm sorry you had to witness this mess." I grimaced a bit.

"It's not that." He quickly cut in. "It was just very weird." He rubbed his neck a bit and then put his hands in his pockets. "That first night when you left, I thought they would fight."

I remained silent at this. I couldn't say it was shocking per se. It was nothing new. Dwarves tended to be loud and blunt when they expressed their feelings. That this would translate into rather violent behaviours was rather logical.

"They were accusing each other and yelling. Bifur and Bombur were the only ones who didn't say a thing. At some point though, Bifur lost it and started to yell in that harsh language of theirs." Bilbo explained softly, looking down at his feet while he spoke.

I gasped when I heard that Bifur had lost his temper. I knew what this could mean. He was a kind dwarf, but I knew, mostly from what the others had told me, that he would sometimes become very violent. This was due to his injury, and there was nothing to be done to help him. That aside, it was also quite scary because I knew that Bifur was probably one of the very best warriors of the Blue Mountains. I had been told so, and I had seen it the few times I witnessed a spar between him and Dwalin. To be honest, I had almost feared for Dwalin's health at some points.

Obviously the others had managed to calm him down that night, and it was undoubtedly a good thing.

"I don't know what he said, but clearly it forced them all to remain quiet." Bilbo shrugged before he added. "After that they didn't fight so much, but they often got angry whenever you were mentioned."

I sighed loudly but didn't say a word. There was nothing to say or add on this topic.

Bilbo didn't seem to mind and we walked in silence until we arrived at the market.

"I think it did you good."

I startled and stopped before I looked at Bilbo.

"I'm sorry, what did you say?" I asked him, persuaded that I had misheard him.

"This whole mess seemed to have had positive effects on you." Bilbo insisted while he looked at the vegetables on the stand in front of us.

"How..." I shook my head and decided to ask another question. "Why do you think that?"

"You seem to know what you want." He shrugged but when he saw my surprised face he decided to elaborate. "When I met you, and during this whole quest, you were always thinking about the dwarves first." He calmly explained. "Whenever you did something it was for the dwarves, or how the dwarves would do it. It was a bit odd. Now though, you seem," He hesitated a bit on the word to use before he finished, "you seem different."

I looked at Bilbo while he efficiently chose fresh vegetables and paid for them. I was still silent when I trailed behind him to a fisherman's stand. We didn't speak about this topic anymore and our discussions that morning were mostly about the products we bought and how to best use them. It was somewhat refreshing and I could only appreciate Bilbo's knowledge of vegetables, fishes, and recipes associated to those products.

A little while later, I was busy in the kitchen, preparing some food while the dwarves were outside with Bilbo. I didn't know for sure what they were doing but I could guess that it had to do with the quest. I tried to keep my mind off that topic, and it was naturally that my thoughts turned back to Bilbo's earlier words.

I wasn't too sure how to feel or what to think.

Bilbo's thoughts had shocked me.

In a way though, I could tell he was right.

I had changed in the short month I had spent here alone.

I was stronger. I knew now that I was able to live alone, I didn't like it, but I could do it. It seemed silly, but somehow it made a huge difference in my relationships with the dwarves.

We had all realized that I didn't need them. I could live quite well on my own. I didn't need them, they probably didn't need me either. But I wanted to be a part of their world and clearly they wanted me to be one of theirs too. At least to some extent. I wasn't the lost human girl anymore. I was now the human healer who had somehow gained the trust of several influential dwarves. I was a good healer and could be of use. I was strong enough to be a woman living alone. I had earned respect.

This whole mess had indeed been somewhat useful.

Still, it didn't mean that I wanted to rush into danger. I was now aware of what danger awaited them on their quest. Most of all I knew what my weaknesses were. I knew my limits. Sadly enough it meant that I didn't feel strong enough to follow them when they would leave. If there truly was a dragon in that mountain, I knew I wouldn't be able to do anything. Worse even, I would probably distract some of them and that could easily get them killed.

I was so lost in my thoughts that I startled violently when someone spoke behind me. I thought the others were all outside and hadn't expected any of them to come back quietly inside.

"We're leaving." Thorin said calmly in his deep voice.

I froze.

For a second, fear gripped at my heart and I didn't know what to do or say. I didn't look at him, but I knew he was still in the room. The knife that I had been holding seemed suspended in the air as my movements had stopped abruptly. Deliberately, I forced my hands to work again, focusing on peeling the vegetables in front of me.

"When?" I finally asked.

I was glad to hear my voice didn't break. My feelings weren't as easy to control unfortunately.

"Tomorrow." He gruffly replied and my heart stopped.

I didn't know how I managed to put down the knife and not cut myself instead. Mechanically I rinsed my hands and wiped them on a towel before I placed them flat on the table. I took a slow inhale. I needed to focus on the important things. What was important right now?

"You'll need supplies." I finally said.

"The others are taking care of it as we speak." Thorin stepped further in the kitchen and walked to the window.

The small table next to which I was standing was near the opposite wall. I still couldn't find it in myself to turn and look at Thorin. I wasn't sure what I would see when I did. I had somehow avoided him for a while. We hadn't really talked at all since he had given me the beads. I wasn't sure what to say.

"You'll leave early in the morning, I guess." I commented rather stupidly.

"I don't want to waste any more time." He calmly replied. "Durin's Day is coming. We can't miss it."

"I know."

We were both silent for a moment. I wondered why he was the one to tell me this. I would have thought that Nori would let me know when they decided to leave. Why would Thorin bother coming to tell me this? I was sure he didn't want me to follow them. Why then would he come to let me know about their departure?

Once again, he tore me away from my thoughts. His words were not at all what I expected them to be and it surprised me enough to make me turn and face him.

"Aren't you going to ask me to braid your beads back?" He asked gruffly.

I hadn't been sure so far how I would react to Thorin. I couldn't be sure. Now that I had no other choice but to talk with him alone though, I was surprisingly calm and collected. Somehow I didn't need to think about my reply. It came naturally, as if it had always been obvious.

"No." I even shook my head a bit for emphasis.

"Don't you want it back?" He frowned.

"It doesn't matter what I want." I said calmly, looking at him with an assurance I hadn't known I had. "Either you think I could be a member of your clan, of your people, or you don't. It's not my choice to make."

He looked at me sharply, evaluating me.

I looked back calmly.

Then something extremely rare happened. Thorin smiled.

I blinked and looked at him as he nodded. It was odd to see him do this. He was usually so serious, and rightly so. He had so many responsibilities, so many problems, it was indeed a rare thing to see him smile at all. Clearly my behaviour met his approval.

"It would be my honour to ask you to become a true member of my clan." He said solemnly and I suddenly felt tears prickle the corners of my eyes.

"It would be my honour to accept and become a member of your clan." I replied, voice heavy with emotions.

He nodded again and then tilted his head a bit.

"If you go and retrieve the beads, I'll braid them in your hair now." He said calmly and I smiled.

"Here." I simply reached in my pocket and took out the precious beads. He seemed slightly surprised by this, so I decided to explain myself as I blushed a bit. "I wasn't about to let them somewhere where someone could take them."

He didn't comment but nodded approvingly. Without exchanging another word we both took a chair and he gingerly took some of my hair. As he slowly started to braid them, I felt strong emotions. I was proud, happy and relieved all at the same time. I struggled to keep my tears at bay.

"This doesn't mean that I will allow you to follow us tomorrow when we leave." He said calmly as he took a few strands of my hair.

"I know." I replied.

"Do you intend on following us anyway?" He sighed, separating the strands and braiding them.

I took a short moment before I replied.

"I don't think I will." It was almost a whisper as I wasn't really happy to admit this;

He seemed startled by this answer and stopped all movements for a few seconds. I didn't know what he would think of it.

"Why is that?" He finally asked evenly.

"I am a healer, not a warrior." I admitted after several seconds of silence. "I don't think I'd be able to help you much and I don't want to be a distraction to any of you." I told him honestly. "I fear you'll all need to be focused on this quest and I don't want to hinder it." I bit my lower lip and after a moment decided to add something that had been on my mind for a few days. "I'd be glad if you allow me to join you after a few days though, in case some of you are injured, I could meet you at the mountain's feet. Taking care of you all is my duty after all."

He kept braiding my hair but didn't say a word for a long time.

"It'll take us a day to reach the other shore. From then, we'll have another day to get to the hidden door. Leave Laketown three days after our departure, and meet us there."

Those words suddenly symbolised how he had truly accepted me. At that moment, I couldn't have stopped the beaming smile that popped on my face even if I had wanted to.

Bifur was the first dwarf to come back home this afternoon.

Thorin had left me alone after he finished to braid my hair. Before he left he had kindly placed his forehead against mine and had warmly welcomed me in his clan. I wanted to hug him badly at that point, but I knew he wouldn't appreciate it.

When Bifur came in, I was actually busy playing with my beads. I loved the feel of them in my hair. I didn't have as many braids as before yet, but it was still great to feel the familiar coldness of the stone against my skin, and their slight weight in my hair.

I blushed terribly though, when I realized that Bifur had witnessed my behaviour. He didn't say a word, but that wasn't really strange. He smiled and nodded, as if approving of it all, and sat in front of me.

"Do you want to drink something?" I asked him.

I really liked Bifur. He had been my mentor and I really appreciated all the help he had given me. His story was so sad that it broke my heart to think of it. I didn't know all the details, obviously, but it still hurt to see him so silent and lost in his world.

He simply nodded and I quickly stood up and grabbed a tankard that I filled with ale.

"There you go."

Sitting in silence with Bifur was peaceful. I usually appreciated it enough not to break it. This time though, there was something I wanted to know, and oddly enough, I only trusted Bifur with this particular topic.

When Thorin had said that they would leave the next morning, one of the first thoughts that jumped to my mind was about Nori. The fact that the end of this quest was so uncertain made me fear for him. I knew Nori was strong and skilled, but would it be enough if they all had to face a dragon? And if there was no dragon, who knew for sure what they would find in that mountain? After so many years, maybe other creatures had decided to hide in there. Nori was skilled, but he wasn't invincible.

Those thoughts always made me extremely unsettled. I cared for all the dwarves, but I honestly didn't know what I'd do if Nori died. It sounded cheesy and terribly stupid, but in a way I didn't think I would be able to live happily if he was gone.

I shook my head, trying to get rid of such depressing thoughts.

They were the reason why I wanted to speak with Bifur right now though.

"Bifur?" I quietly called him and continued only when he looked at me. "I'd like to ask you something. It's a bit embarrassing."

He looked at me curiously and gestured for me to continue. Blushing terribly I finally found the courage to ask him what I wanted, hopefully he wouldn't laugh too much…

But even if he did, it didn't matter, it would be worth it in the end.

* * *

><p>Much later that day, I was all alone in my room, focusing on the task I was intent on finishing as soon as possible. Bifur had laughed good heartedly, but had quickly given me the advices I had wanted. He truly was a kind dwarf.<p>

Blowing softly on the small stone in my hand, I narrowed my eyes and looked at my work. It seemed to be fine. I tilted my head a bit, wondering whether or not I should keep working on it when I heard a soft knock on my door.

Quickly I gathered the tools I had used and pushed everything in a bag that was on the floor near my bed.

"Come in." I then called, still looking around to make sure I hadn't left anything in plain sight. This slightly made me feel as if I was a teenager again, hiding things from my aunt and uncle.

"Good evening Amelia."

I looked up, startled to hear Dori's voice.

The old merchant was standing at the threshold, waiting patiently for me to invite him in. This action, more than anything else, hurt me deeply. I knew that Dori was fond of propriety, but I considered him to be family. He shouldn't have needed me to invite him twice in my room. He should have known.

Instead of commenting on his behaviour, I forced a smile on my lips.

I could already feel a headache starting to pound against my temples.

"Hello Dori." I replied softly. "How was your day?"

"Good, good." He muttered, clearly he wasn't here to talk about his day.

"Please, come in." I gestured for him to come sit near the window, next to where I currently stood.

The silence between us was awkward. Somehow, I knew it wouldn't be as easy as talking with Ori had been.

Dori slowly stepped in, as if entirely unsure about it, and glanced around. He didn't truly look or stare, it wouldn't be appropriate. But he did take his time to join me on the other side of the room. It didn't feel as if he intruded in my private space, it was more like he was making sure everything was as it should be. Finally, he sat on the small wooden chair, near the table I used as a desk, while I sat on my bed. Lacing my fingers together, I placed my hands on my knees and kept my eyes down.

"Amelia," Dori finally broke the heavy silence. "We'll be leaving tomorrow."

"I know." I muttered, not looking at him.

"Thorin told me you agreed to stay behind." He added conversationally.

I resisted the urge to roll my eyes and sighed softly. I didn't see this discussion ending well if it went in that direction. I didn't want to argue with Dori. That day spent mostly alone in my room had allowed me to think a lot.

The dwarves would leave in the morrow. They would go to Erebor and hopefully the dragon would be long dead when they would enter the old Halls. But nothing was certain, except maybe how unlucky the whole company had been so far.

In the time they had spent here, I had made my peace with everyone. Starting oddly with Gloin and Oin. Over the days and weeks I had spoken with all of them, in small groups or privately.

Bofur, Bombur and Bifur had been kind and understanding. The events at Beorn's had nothing to do with them after all. Bifur had huffed and Bofur had translated his words. Apparently my mentor thought it wasn't right to leave me behind. He thought the others had been stupid to think it would go well with me. Bofur had laughed at that. Apparently he hadn't been surprised by my reaction either.

"How could they think you'd agree with them and stay put? I knew you wouldn't!" Bofur had said joyously.

Bombur had been quieter but had whole heartedly agreed and Bifur had nodded sagely.

Dwalin had been gruff and hadn't stopped frowning, chastising me for acting without thinking. He knew I wouldn't appreciate being left behind, but it wasn't my place to discuss my king's order, he had said sternly. He had also added that I should know my own weaknesses and limitations. After listening to him I had agreed that maybe, just maybe, I could see why Thorin had taken this decision. Still, it didn't mean I thought it was the right one. Dwalin had rolled his eyes and left me alone, grumbling about stubborn and annoying women.

Fili had hugged me tightly, telling me how much he had missed me. I was, apparently in his mind, the only one he truly enjoyed talking with as an equal, besides Kili of course. It was true that our lengthy discussions during this quest and before, had brought us close. Fili was a kind and cheeky dwarf, but he sometimes was able to have truly serious discussions. He enjoyed talking with me, just like I loved chatting with him. He had made me sworn never to do a repeat of my actions, and all was forgotten between us.

Kili had been a bit more stubborn about it. He had pouted and had been obviously hurt by my acts. Clearly, he didn't appreciate the fact that I was able to give up on them, as he said. In the end Fili had to reason with him and we negotiated for a while before Kili agreed to forgive me. The young dwarf had been forced to mourn me, just like the others, and he had truly suffered from it. To be honest I hadn't thought that he would be hurt quite that much. I had no idea, before that day, that he appreciated me quite so much.

"I don't want to mourn anyone anymore." Kili had muttered sadly at some point.

Fili and I had been left speechless. Then only did I understand a bit better what might have crossed Kili's mind. I knew that the dwarf had been extremely young when his father died. So far, no one he was close to had died, except for his dad. Forcing him to mourn for me had probably forced him to remember the previous time he had felt this way. But the fact that, unlike his father, I had chosen to left him, had hurt him deeply.

Through those discussions I had truly started to understand what it had meant for the dwarves. In the end, I was adult enough to admit that they had suffered just as much as I did, if not more. At least I had hoped to see them again. They hadn't been as lucky. For them, because of traditions mostly, they had truly acted as if I was dead to them. Somehow I was starting to believe that they might not have acknowledged me if we had met in other circumstances. Or at least, they wouldn't have unless I talked to them first.

Dwarvish traditions were truly harsh.

My discussions with Balin, and later with Thorin, had been surprisingly easy.

Now that the situation with Ori was cleared, I was left with Dori who had been very polite so far, even though we hadn't cleared the misunderstandings yet.

Rubbing my forehead, deep in thoughts, I finally looked up to see that Dori wasn't looking at me either.

I sighed and shook my head.

"I'll be following you, though I'll wait three days before leaving Laketown." I started to speak calmly. "It should give you enough time to finish this quest without me to disturb you all."

Dori remained silent. He only nodded to acknowledge my words but didn't comment at first.

"I can see that you're wearing almost all your beads." He finally said and I frowned.

"I'm wearing the beads I was offered." I told him calmly. "As I understand it, I am now recognized as a full member of Thorin's clan. I'm recognized as an adult and kin."

"And you're happy with that situation then?" He spat, but I couldn't tell whether he was angry at me or not.

It didn't really matter at this point. I chose not to reply, but it only seemed to fuel his frustration. For a long moment the silence stretched between us, heavy with unvoiced thoughts and griefs. Rather suddenly, Dori stood back up. He was frowning deeply.

"I can see that you don't need us anymore." He muttered lowly before striding towards the door.

His words hit me violently.

Righteous anger lit in my chest and I stood too, fists clenched at my sides.

"How dare you say such a thing?!" I exclaimed furiously. "I have been hurt by you far more than by all the others together. I thought of you as my own brother, as my own family..." I shook my head in disbelief. "Have you any idea how I could feel? All my life I have been eaten by this doubt..." I was half whispering now, tears burning at the back of my eyes as words I had never thought I would dare pronounce just poured out of my mouth in anger and pain. "I have been wondering whether my parents abandoned me, committed suicide and left me behind, gave up on me, on us..." I looked back up and glared at him. "And you did it!" I accused him. "You abandoned me and you expected me to just agree with it." I was furious now.

Words I had never meant to admit loudly were coming out of my mouth uncontrollably. Pain and fears I had always hidden deep within my heart were coming back to the surface and I just couldn't ignore them.

"You didn't even try to talk with me. You let Thorin order me, order me!" I repeated louder. "To stay behind, to stay alone. Did you even think that maybe, just maybe, if you had thought to calmly talk with me, I might have agreed to wait there?"

"Enough Amelia!" He suddenly exclaimed. "You know as well as I do that no matter what we would have said or done, you would have thrown a fit." He growled angrily. "You say we abandoned you? Well, let me tell you that what you did isn't better! You know perfectly that I lost both my parents to grievous injuries they received while on missions, while they were outside the safety of our Halls, and you just insist on following their footsteps!"

"Yeah well, then what you're asking me is to stay put and wait for you to come back? Then what should I do if you don't? Wait without knowing for sure what happened to you?" I threw my hands up in the air in annoyance and frustration.

"You almost died for Mahal's sake!" He spat furiously, hitting the table with his fist in a clear gesture of anger and exasperation.

"And you did too!" I replied just as harshly.

For a short moment there was a quiet lull in our argument. I felt exhausted at this point. It was stupid. I knew that Dori cared. It was obvious. But we were both so stubborn, so angry, that we just couldn't seem to let this go. I knew he had missed me terribly, I knew he had hurt probably just as much as I did. It was obvious. But in the end it didn't seem to help at all. On the contrary, our pain and fears were now fuelling our anger.

"How many times do we need to have this exact same argument?" I finally whispered tiredly.

His shoulders sagged and he looked down.

"One more time apparently." He breathed out before pinching the bridge of his nose and breathing out loudly.

"I'm not a child." I added sadly, looking at him.

"I know." He replied with the same tone. "But that doesn't mean much. I still can't stand to see you hurt. I still feel it is my duty to protect you."

"I know." I used his words.

After another lengthy silence I shook my head a bit and shrugged.

"Now what?"

"I don't think you'll want this bead back." He said sadly, rolling the small purple stone between his fingers.

"I don't need a guardian anymore Dori." It pained me to admit it, but saying the contrary would have been a lie and unfair for both of us.

He nodded and placed it back in his pocket before looking at me. He offered me a small, sad smile and nodded again. Wordlessly, he turned away and left me alone in my room. He didn't close the door behind him.

For a moment I listened to his heavy steps going down the stairs. Sighing sadly, I went to close the door. As I was about to do so, I frowned. I listened intently and shook my head.

"Alright guys, what did you hear?" I called softly to the muffled voices I could barely hear coming from the next room.

The door facing mine opened slowly and Fili, Kili, Ori and Bilbo looked at me sheepishly.

"We didn't mean to pry." Fili said apologetic.

"What did you hear?" I repeated my question.

"Nothing." "Not much." "You didn't take the bead."

I ignored Kili and Bilbo and immediately looked at Ori. He was frowning deeply and pouting a bit.

"I don't need a guardian Ori." I felt as if I kept repeating myself and it was starting to be quite tiring. The pressure between my eyes was a dead give-away to the massive headache I would have if I didn't get some time to unwind soon.

"You don't need us." Ori muttered, looking at his feet.

"That's not what she said." Bilbo intervened softly, surprising us all. He didn't take part in those discussions usually, and rightly so. For a moment I thought the dwarves would be angry at him. Luckily, Fili agreed with the hobbit.

"Ori, you always complain that Dori treats you like a child sometimes. It's the same with Amelia." The blond dwarf calmly commented.

I smiled tiredly at him. During this quest, Fili was proving to be quite mature and aware of the people surrounding him and their needs. One day, he would probably be a good king...that was if Thorin didn't decide to marry and then had heirs. Bilbo's voice took me back to the present time and I shook my head a bit.

"She's clearly able to take care of herself." Bilbo added with a small gesture that indicated the house.

Ori was about to speak but I chose to cut in right then.

"You know that I don't want to stay here alone, right?" I stepped forward and gently took Ori's hand in mine.

"Then why didn't you take back the bead?" He was sad and obviously, this whole mess was becoming tiring to us all.

"Because it wouldn't be fair. I wouldn't be happy unless Dori finally realize that I'm not to be protected like a child."

"But you need to be protected." Ori complained.

"Maybe, but not all the time." I smiled and kissed his cheek. "I am able to take my own decisions Ori, and when Dori realizes that I want to be a part of your lives, but as an adult, not a child, then of course I'll be happy to accept a kinship bead."

I hugged Ori tightly.

This whole mess had created more problem than I could have imagined. It was astounding to see all the ramifications my little stunt at Beorn's had. It had been a good thing though, maybe.

"Are you going to be alright?" I whispered softly to Ori.

"Aye." He replied after a moment. "You?"

"I'll be."

After a few more minutes spent holding each other, my four friends decided to go downstairs while I remained in my room. As I told them, I needed some time alone. The door had been closed for barely a minute when I heard the window open and close in my back.

"Don't you ever use doors?" I asked teasingly, turning just as Nori gathered me in his arms.

"Are you really alright?" He ignored my question to ask.

"How long have you been on this balcony?" I sighed, letting my head rest on his shoulder.

"I arrived just after Dori." He replied, rubbing soothingly on my back. "You two know how to argue."

"You're one to talk." I said dryly and he smirked almost proudly in reply.

He smiled as he softly pressed a kiss on my brow. For a long, peaceful moment he held me against his chest and I forgot about all the things that were troubling me. It was quiet. The others were all downstairs or outside. No one would come to disturb me, hopefully.

"Mizimul, are you sure you're taking the right decision?"

I closed my eyes and hid my face against his beard. For a minute longer I wanted to ignore the rest of the world, but clearly Nori didn't want to let me.

"I have my reasons." I finally muttered. Looking back up at Nori, he quirked an eyebrow, encouraging me to explain. "I meant everything I told him and Ori. But there's also the fact that, as I understand it, if he's my guardian he has a say in the important decision I may want to take." I explained quietly before gently taking Nori's face in my hands.

For a moment I remained quiet, simply focused on him. I observed my own fingers as they trailed against his cheeks, then his braids. I felt him shiver a bit and I stopped. Locking our gazes together I smiled, though it was a bit sad.

"I won't let Dori have a say in whether or not I can be with you." I finally admitted.

Nori's eyes were shining with restrained emotions at my words. Softly, I leant forward and kissed him.

For a while we stood in the middle of my room, busy exchanging soft kisses tenderly.

I knew that Nori would leave the next morning and the thought terrified me. At some point though, I just couldn't push it to the back of my mind anymore. My thief obviously sensed it as he pressed his forehead against mine. His grey eyes looked at me with concern.

"Don't worry." He finally whispered against my lips. "I'll be fine." He kissed me before moving away slightly. "I'll be careful."

"You better be." I breathed out before grabbing his collar tightly and forcing him into a slightly more heated kiss.

Nori complied eagerly, burying his hand in my hair. I heard him groan when his fingers found the bead he had braided in my hair, at the base of my neck. I couldn't help but moan and press more tightly against him at this point.

I was starting to lose my mind. When I felt his fingers against my bare skin I jolted. Eyes wide open again, I could only see his startled expression.

"Mizimul?" He asked worriedly.

"How in Mahal's name did you manage to open my tunic without me noticing it?" I blurted out, looking at my attire.

Nori had discarded my belt and had managed to open my leather corset and my tunic enough to snake his hand under my clothes. All the while I honestly hadn't noticed anything of the sort happening. As I looked back up at him, I snorted at the obviously smug smirk he was now displaying.

"You sneaky thief." I chuckled before pecking his lips loudly.

I stepped away from him though, because otherwise I knew I would just ignore the world surrounding me again. I usually didn't mind, but tonight might be my last night with Nori in a while. I didn't want to think about it, but I just couldn't simply ignore the fact either. Obviously, Nori knew how I felt because his smirk turned into a tender smile and he gathered me in his arms again.

"I have something for you." I softly told him, disentangling myself from his warm arms and quickly padding to the table near the window.

Wordlessly I grabbed the small stone I had been working on that day and held it tightly in my fist. For a moment I brought it against my heart as I turned to face Nori.

My cheeky thief seemed to be quite curious at this point. He was looking at me, head slightly tilted to the side, waiting patiently for me to move or talk. He crossed his arms and remained silent as I walked back to him.

I swallowed thickly and looked at him, a slight blush already heating my cheeks.

"I want you to be careful. You don't know what's in that mountain." I softly said.

He smiled kindly and uncrossed his arms. With his right hand, he gingerly caressed my cheek and brushed away a stray strand of my hair. I closed my eyes when he leant to kiss my nose.

"I'll be careful." He finally said softly.

I looked up at him, worried even though I tried my best not to be. I knew that Nori was strong and smart. I knew he had survived through a lot of hardships before. Objectively he didn't need me to tell him to be careful. But even though my brain knew all that, my heart just didn't seem to be appeased in the least. I sighed softly and looked at my hands.

The cold stone was now warm under my palm.

Taking a deep breath I took Nori's hand in mine and turned it so his palm would face up. He complied obligingly and wordlessly. Then, slowly, I placed the stone in his palm and finally let go of it.

My cheeks were heated by embarrassment and I didn't dare look at Nori. I wasn't sure how he would react to this small present. I could only hope he wouldn't mock my poor craftsmanship.

The stone wasn't a precious one. It was a simple stone I had found on the shore. It was a dark grey in colour with white veins. Water had smoothed it over time and it was soft to the touch. On one side I had managed to carve Nori's name in runes, along with a rune that was supposed to bring protection to the carrier. It was that side that Nori saw first, but he quickly turned the stone and I saw him froze for an instant. On the other side I had carved the word Id-âlnas in runes. It hadn't been easy, and I had thanked Bifur profusely for his help. The old warrior hadn't even laughed in a mocking way, it was more cheerful than anything else. Once he had calmed down, he had simply looked at me kindly, huffing a few happy sounding words before writing down the word for me. I still wasn't too sure what it meant, but when I had asked Bifur whether it would be an appropriate parting gift, he had nodded vigorously.

It had been hard work, but as I dared look at Nori, I knew it had been worth the effort.

He was staring at the stone with wide eyes, his cheeks slightly pink. When he glanced at me, I saw him open his mouth, as if to talk, but he had to clear his throat several times before he managed to utter a word.

"Mizimul I ..."

"I don't know for sure what it means." I interrupted softly. "But it felt right." I added, blushing terribly before looking down. "I know the stone isn't anything precious..."

"I'll keep it as I would mithril." Nori interrupted before kissing me once again. "Id-âlnas." He whispered against my lips and I felt my heart leap in my chest.

"Id-âlnas." I repeated softly, tasting the word as it rolled easily on my tongue.

Nori immediately reacted by crushing me against him and passionately kissing me.

I sagged against him as my knees weakly gave up and Nori easily held me tightly to his chest. I was breathless and slightly light headed when he stopped after some time.

That night, Nori remained by my side.

We spent the night together, sometimes talking, often kissing, and simply enjoying each other. I apparently couldn't get enough of feeling his hands against my bare skin. Nori obviously agreed with this sentiment as he seemed to enjoy running his hands on any part of my naked skin he could find.

All too soon though, Nori tightened his hold on me and whispered against my ear.

"I have to go."

I felt a painful jab in my heart and I clenched my fists. For a moment I couldn't breathe at all.

"I don't want you to." I blurted out, unable to stop the words.

Nori didn't reply. He looked at me for a moment and I could see in the dim light that his eyes seemed to be shining with unspoken emotions. But all too soon he moved away and quickly gathered his clothes. I could only look at him, sadness encompassing me as I knew that nothing I could say would prevent him from going. He glanced at me, and smiled softly before leaning closer.

"I'll see you soon." He kissed me one last time before he stood back up.

I gathered the sheets and blankets around me, looking at him forlornly while he put back his clothes and hid his weapons. Lastly he took the stone I had carved and placed it in one of his inside pockets, in the left side of his leather jacket.

"You'll come to see us leave?" He asked and I couldn't help but roll my eyes.

"Of course." I replied with a shrug.

He seemed to hesitate then, but instead of leaving quickly, he decided to kneel on the bed and kiss me one last time.

"I love you Mizimul." He whispered softly.

"I love you too." I replied, caressing his cheek.

As he turned away to leave, I couldn't help but call him once more.

"Nori?" He looked over his shoulder questioningly. "What does mizimul mean?" I asked softly, hoping this time he would reply.

He remained silent for a while, his hand on the door knob, looking at me. I could see his eyes perfectly in the moonlight. For a moment I thought he wouldn't say another word, but he once more managed to surprise me.

"Jewel." He replied before leaving swiftly.

I was speechless and could feel my cheeks burn from a dark blush.

Well, I could admit that it could have been worse. But knowing that Nori had called me 'jewel' for so long probably meant that his feelings for me were just as old as the nickname. I blushed even more as I realized that.

With a soft, happy smile, I lied back down and closed my eyes.

I could still catch a couple hours of sleep before they left.

* * *

><p>That morning, I gloomily followed behind the dwarves as they left my house. The sky was clear and blue, not reflecting my feelings at all. The sun hadn't fully risen yet, but already the dwarves were ready to leave Laketown. They had new weapons, bags and clean clothes. They could thank the town's master for that. The man's greed was impressive. The simple thought of receiving riches from the dwarves had been enough to convince him to help. The fact that the dwarves weren't rich yet apparently meant nothing to him.<p>

The fact that they might all die and never come back wasn't mentioned either.

Apparently I was the only one to think about this possibility.

I knew that I shouldn't be quite so gloom. I had to be encouraging and I had to hope that everything would be alright. But considering the luck, or lack thereof, that the dwarves had during this quest, I couldn't help but think of the worst.

I was following them as they went to the shore, where the town's master had asked three fishermen to prepare boats for the dwarves. Food had been placed in the boats already, as well as some spare blankets. There was barely anyone up to greet the dwarves at this time. The master apparently didn't feel like saying goodbye either.

There was no music, no cheering, nothing. Clearly the men would behave differently if and when the dwarves would come back with gold and jewels. This behaviour was quite revolting, but I didn't say a word. It wasn't my place to say anything.

I was observing my friends and kins as they placed their belongings in the boats and talked together about the final leg of their journey. As the minutes ticked by, I felt my heart grow heavier in my chest.

"Amelia." Thorin brought me out of my thoughts. "We'll go now. We'll see you later this week." He nodded at me, standing proudly. Still, I could see in his eyes, and in the hard lines between his brows, that he was anxious to reach Erebor.

I couldn't even fathom what he might feel at that moment. How long had it been for him? What could he be feeling right now, as his goal was within his reach yet still uncertain? I blinked, knowing that I would never voice those questions.

"Aye." I forced a smile on my lips. "Be careful. I don't feel like being overworked after I meet with you again."

Thorin smiled and shook his head. He took a few steps and patted my shoulder a bit.

"You'll soon see the wonders of Erebor." He said with a smile. "Soon, we'll feast in the Halls of my forefather. Don't fret. We will be fine." His eyes seemed to take this faraway look, letting me know that he was there at that moment. I knew he could see it. I could only hope and pray for him to achieve his goal.

"I should hope so." I muttered, smirking a bit.

With a last pat on my shoulder and another nod, Thorin left to go towards the boat. I knew it meant I just had a few more minutes to say my goodbyes. The next minutes I managed to hug almost everyone, and that included a grumbling Dwalin. I hugged Nori fiercely too, while Bofur and Bombur were talking with Dori, and finally my old guardian was the only one I hadn't said goodbye to yet.

The other dwarves were busy placing the last bags in the boats as I walked to Dori.

"Dori." I called him softly and he turned to face me immediately.

"Amelia." He nodded.

We stood for a moment, not exchanging a word or a glance, until I finally couldn't take it anymore. In two steps I was in his arms, hugging him just as tightly as I had hugged the others.

"We have our differences, but I love you." I whispered in his ear. "Please, be careful. I couldn't stand seeing you hurt."

"I'll be careful." He replied hoarsely. "And you don't go rushing into danger."

"I swear, I'll try my best to stay safe." I told him seriously.

"Let's go." Thorin's voice forced us to let go of each others and I stepped back.

I could feel tears burning in my eyes as I looked at the three boats leaving the shore. The sun was rising as my friends grew tinier and tinier. I stayed there, looking at them until I just couldn't see them anymore. I could feel my hands tremble a bit and the tears rolling on my cheeks.

Fear settled in my chest.

Now I would have to wait.

* * *

><p>I woke up in a second.<p>

My heart was hammering in my chest and I was trembling.

I had no idea what had startled me awake or why I felt terrified. I had been unsettled during the past days, since the dwarves had left, but it didn't explain the sudden terror I felt deep within my bones.

And then I suddenly heard that sound, that sound that had probably awoken me. It was a roar. A horrifying roar that immediately made me feel like a powerless prey. It was instinct, simply primal instinct.

As the roar resonated in the distance for the third time, I forced myself to stand up and put on my clothes. My hands were shaking badly as I tried to bind the leather strings of my corset over my tunic. My brain was completely awake but I somehow seemed stuck on completing that stupid task. I had no idea why I would somehow find it important to be decently clothed. It shouldn't have mattered.

I heard that same angry sounding roar twice more before I was actually finally able to gather my wits. I hesitated for a moment before I picked my daggers. What could I possibly do with them? I had no idea, but it didn't matter. I took them anyway.

I might be terrified out of my wits right then, but I wasn't stupid. The only thing that could possibly be doing such a noise was a...and I couldn't believe I actually thought that, but it was without a doubt a dragon. A dragon! And he didn't sound friendly if the roar I heard once again was anything to go by. Those daggers would be useless, but I still sheathed them and rushed downstairs. I swore as I missed a step in my hurry and actually crashed against the wall. Pain shot in my shoulder and arm, but I ignored it. I quickly went into the wards and grabbed my healer's satchel. I had made sure everything I could need was packed up in it since the dwarves' departure. That could actually prove to be more useful than my daggers.

I wasn't sure exactly what I was doing though.

Why was I rushing through my supplies, grabbing small pouches and phials? What was I doing? My body was working on some sort of instinct and I had no idea what in Mahal's name I was doing. When someone woke up in the middle of the night because of a dragon, surely their first reaction wasn't to put on their clothes, grab their weapons and healing supplies and ... and then what?

As I stopped to ponder on this I finally realized what it was exactly that I was doing. I was apparently thinking of going to the mountain earlier than I was told to. I needed to go there. I had to go and find the dwarves. I had to, because if the dragon was awake...

I didn't finish that trail of thoughts and ushered in my kitchen to grab my long staff then I rushed through my front door and actually stopped.

I hadn't heard the dragon's roar in several, excruciating long minutes.

What did that mean?

What could it mean?

What I could now hear, was the sound of people opening their shutters, and wondering aloud about what was going on. A few townsmen had started to get out of their houses and were now, like me, looking at the dark sky. A few murmurs were exchanged between neighbours, but soon everyone quieted down.

The night seemed suddenly eerily silent. Too silent actually.

I couldn't hear anything except for the soft clapping noise made by the lake's water.

Life seemed to still. There wasn't even a soft breeze to break that calm. Then my ears caught a very strange sound. It was similar to a breath, but not quite. It was slow, steady and seemed to be becoming louder quickly. As if it was coming closer.

My heart started to hammer in my chest though I couldn't really express what was suddenly terrifying me.

There was one more second of eerie quiet before all hell broke loose.

The darkness of the night was brutally shattered by a jet of flames. Suddenly the town was ablaze. Suddenly silence turned into screams. Suddenly, the world was burning.

I stood frozen in horror.

Then that roar that had awoken me resounded once again, though this time it rattled my bones. Another jet of flames surged from the sky, lighting it enough for me to catch sight of a massive creature. It was big as a house, with wings so wide that the eagles I had met months ago would have looked small in comparison. Before I could observe it further, I realized with dread that the dragon was flying in my direction. I saw its chest light as he took in a breath.

In a second my body reacted on pure instinct.

Now wasn't the time to observe the dragon.

A dragon!

By Mahal, a dragon!

Eyes wide in pure terror I ran as fast as I could towards the lake. I could feel the air heat around me as the dragon finally spat his fire on this part of town. I closed my eyes and jumped, bringing my arms uselessly around my head while the world around me turned into a fiery inferno. The coldness of the water hit me violently and for a moment I remained stunned underwater. The temperature shock was enough to force all air out of my lungs and I was forced to swim back up. It was incredibly hard to swim with all my clothes on and with my staff firmly in one hand. My limbs felt heavy because of the drenched fabric that clung to my body. As I finally breached the surface of the lake, I managed to catch my breath, and immediately started to cough violently.

The air was burning. Ashes flew around. The world was afire.

Even the water was starting to feel warmer.

I swam as best as I could, hindered by my clothes and weapons, and reached the shore with difficulty. My long, light staff was used to help me stand at this point. Leaning heavily on it right then, I looked at the wet sand with wide eyes. I couldn't stay there. The dragon kept flying above our heads, breathing fire and death on us. The silence of the night was now filled with screams of terror and pain. Worst still, was the crackling sound of fire. I staggered to my feet, haggard for a moment, looking around me and unsure of what I should do. I couldn't go further in town, it would be suicidal. The place was burning. I couldn't help anyone. I couldn't even be sure at this point that I would survive the night.

Flames were reaching high in the sky, the house next to mine was already burning and the bridge I used to go in town was almost completely gone already.

I finally managed to move when I saw and heard people trying to swim in my direction. Immediately I ran back in the water, helping those who were coming closer to their feet. Horrified faces were screaming words of despair. No one knew what to do. As I helped a young girl to reach the shore, my heart tore at the thought of Tilda, Sigrid and Bain who were probably still in their house. I sent a quick prayer to Mahal, shockingly thinking that nothing short of a miracle could save us all.

Nothing was certain, not with a dragon breathing fire over Laketown.

Mahal...would I survive the night?

* * *

><p><strong>AN: Finally an update! And on my birthday at that! :) I've been so busy these past months that I barely managed to write a chapter :/ anyway, thanks a lot (as usual) to everyone brave enough to read this story so far. Thanks a lot to all the new favourites and follows! **

**I also want to thank you all for your kind thoughts and words. It truly warmed my heart. Thank you all.**

**To be entirely honest, I'm not too happy with this chapter. It feels a bit off, and it's obviously far from being my best. Anyways, I did put lots of work in it, and I do hope that it is enjoyable for you all to read. This one (and I fear the next two chapters) just don't want to be written and edited... **

**I'll update as soon as I can for the next one, but my work in RL is currently inviting itself during my private time so I'm not sure how it'll go. Rest assured that I will update anyway ;)**

**See you all soon. **


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